Shutdown Fullcast - 40 FOR 40: Playoffs Are Bowl Games

Episode Date: December 18, 2024

"Ryan, you're a lawyer." "Oh God."It's the unavoidable return of 40 For 40, in which we preview each college football postseason game in as much detail as they each deserveSubjected to scrutiny today: the four first-round playoff games, plus the Myrtle Beach, Potato, and Hawaii BowlsFor the purposes of this weird shambling postseason, we're treating the playoffs like bowl games, which is going about as well as you'd think. Hope you're ready to talk about Indiana municipal zoning!Holly does some Christmas shoppingA Philly-themed kitchen mystery arisesWouldn't it be funny if we got a three-loss national champion? LOL not you, BamaVawls and Buckeyes prepare to point their Carhartt-clad Spider-Man fingers at each other in the darkWhy the genuinely troubling weather forecast is the one for the Myrtle Beach BowlYou're goddamn right it's the return of the Dr. Potato BlogEither San Jose State or South Florida is about to beat a bowl-eligible team for the first time this year! Don't think too hard about thatThanks as always to Wikipedia, powering the 40 for 40 for however long we've been doing thisFullcast theme song arranged and performed by Corey CunninghamListen to Ryan's other, less harrowing show, We're Not All Like This, and check out his new narrative podcast with Steven Godfrey, Who Killed College Football? https://www.wkcfb.com/Check out Jason's free CFB Watch Grid newsletter and other work: https://www.jasonkirk.fyi/Find Holly and Spencer writing and chirping at https://channel-6.ghost.io/Purchase only the finest Fullcast gear at sunny https://preownedairboats.com/

Ryan, you're a lawyer. Oh, God. Can you explain to me what an in-REM lawsuit is? I'm going to see if I can remember what this is. I think these are the lawsuits where you sue for, like, seizure of specific piece of property. So when you see, like, United States versus 378 wolf pelts or something like that, I believe that's an in-REM lawsuit, yeah. Correct. This is a blue-sky thread via Robert McNeese at McNeese.

B-sky. social. Please don't feel bad for Robert McNeese, but he did, in fact, grow up down the street from me, go vals. And he has dropped a thread because the Justice

Department has filed a lawsuit and I'm just going to read it here. United States of America, plaintiff versus approximately two terrier mix-type dogs defendants. And Robert has just posted a running list of in rem lawsuits.

He says the best note example is United States v. one book called Ulysses, but he's also posted U.S. v. approximately 64,695 pounds of shark fins. United States v. a quantity of

copies of books. This is a quantity of copy of books at all v. Kansas. And United States v. 95 barrels more or less, alleged apple cider vinegar there's so many qualifiers in that one I got to tell you

there is no better environment into which we could step to film the episode that contains the potato bowl critical support to two terriers fuck the feds Welcome to the shutdown

You were listening to the shutdown football podcast. I'm listening to the Internet's only college football podcast. I'm Spencer Hall. That's Ryan Nanny. That's Holly Anderson. On the ones and twos is Michael Serber. Quick update from last week, Spencer. So it won't be a problem for any of you. We are here to do 40 for 40.

This is part two. He's interrupting everybody. Shit. Yeah. You feel like a woman server? Let's go, girls. I love that fucking song. I like how these are going to be parceled out over the course of the next few weeks.

So that beat by beat, separated by seven days of real time, everyone gets to hear us pick right back up at a higher point of derangement every time because let me let you behind the curtain here. Ladies and Thadies, recording these episodes

makes us insane. There's so much information. There's a lot of information. But as we discussed in episode one, we didn't even, like, there was no arc to this. We just started bad and broken. No. So that's...

Usually it takes us to the capital what used to be the capital one bull to really really snap yeah but spencer took a candy land shortcut already there already at suicide so holly has divvied these up so we have a a truly an unusual combination of bulls it's not my fault to put the games here but it is stupid that they put the games here yes yes uh so we holly i want you to decide do you want us to start by talking talking about the on-campus first round play let's keep the chronology in order let's pick up where we left off which is in the evening of friday december 20th uh because technically these are postseason games and therefore that means they they must be bowls uh i do not make the rules uh the first game is 8 p m on abc and

ESPN. It is a college football playoff first round game. It is being played in Notre Dame Stadium. In what it says on ESPN's website is Notre Dame Indiana. I don't think that's right. That feels like when... I'm pretty sure that town has a name. No, it says Notre Dame Indiana. Yeah, that feels like when a suburb decides like, we're going to break off so we don't have to pay Texas for more. This is why I learned. It's a census designated place and unincorporated community. How bucolic north of the city is South Bend

in Indiana. If you guys, this is, ooh, man, the Wikipedia on this gets weird early. The area was settled in the early 19th century by fur traders and was established as a city in 1865.

River access assisted heavy industrial development such as that of the Studebaker. The Oliver chilled plow company. What is a chilled plow? It's just relaxed, but a plow. Is it a man named Oliver chilled, or is chilled modifying plow? That's exactly, my question exactly.

The British company. Today, the largest industries in South Bend are health care, education, small business, and tourism? Are you adding the question mark or is it already there? I am. I'm adding it to Wikipedia now. man listen some real dorks wrote the south bend indiana

indiana wikipedia page i don't need to know who your first postmaster was no not important esteemed actor omar sheree unless yeah unless it was somebody cool if you're like holy shit maybe that big boss man was the first postmaster general

let's go let's go on down to to list of people from south bend indiana and see if we can't find something interesting uh the peat buddhaj is first so this is not going to be promised. Are you not promising? Vivica A. Fox. Huh.

This is picking up. Dean Norris, sex gifts. Mr. Cells out to Dean Norris. Sidney Pollock. A number of football players and baseball and basketball players of renowned, Ryan Newman.

Okay. Sportscaster Ann Doyle. Okay. Tom. Big Daddy Donahue, pioneering rock and roll radio disc jockey, record producer, concert promoter. Late boss, emo band The Merchant Ships.

I don't know. I'm all the way down to heavy industries. I think we can go ahead and talk about football. This is a fascinating little hamlet that we're having a bowl in. Did we say what this game is? Did we say the matchup? I don't remember. We're about to get to that. It's number

in Indiana versus number seven for some reason, Notre Dame, for who will be kings of this land? Indiana's from a real city. That's a great point, Holly, and thank you for bringing it up. Home field apparel. Indiana and Notre Dame have only played each other in football one time since 1958. That's some bullshit, man. That's so stupid.

I love that they're making them do this. In the early days in like the 40s and such, like played plenty. There's one game in the 90s. That's it. More fun history that I'm sure Notre Dame fans haven't heard about. Notre Dame has not won a major bowl since the 1994 Cotton Bowl. Do you know how old Marcus Freeman was who didn't, like, grow up? I'm flinching.

Was he born? He was eight years old. Oh, yeah. Okay, okay. I braced for that one, but it's all right. It is like the story of Notre Dame in the postseason. over the last, God, the 30 basically years, is in big games, not likely to show up. Sometimes they'll show up in a way where it's like, oh, they lost less badly, but has no

demonstrated history of in a quote-unquote major bowl, which you can think of as sort of like the group of six bowls, no progress has been made. Some absolute stinkers in here as well. in non-major bowls they do fine they do usually pretty well but this happens to be a first-round playoff game so if this isn't a major bowl i don't know what the hell is uh that said if you look at the defensive numbers analytics-wise for notre dame they're just killer like the run defense is great they get a bunch of pass pressure like they they should be a big problem for indiana on that side of the ball.

I guess the biggest question for me is probably, hey, Curtis Rourke, how's that hand doing? Hey, I got, I went and looked on Etsy for Notre Dame Bowl. Uh-huh. And you are not going to believe what I found. What do we got? A Mobile Oil Cotton Bowl classic 1992 Libby Glass commemorative bowl. Notre Dame versus Texas A&M.

I am buying this. Please do. Absolutely do. Add to cart. Yes. Add to cart. It's an important part of history. What of you is getting this for Christmas?

Sorry, Godfrey. No, that's fair. That's fair. All right. Look, I don't think it's unkind for us to say we're all rooting for Indiana to win this game, right? No. No. No apologies given for that.

Not with anti-Catholic Spencer Hall on the show. That's correct. I don't even think particularly hopeful Notre Dame fans should be surprised at this. Like, you are playing one of the best stories in college football. year that you have as we've said you haven't played in over 60 years at this point they are not just a like fun plucky upstart but when they win they win decisively please go look at like what they did to Nebraska what they did they did most recently to Purdue frankly Google them if you will yes Google them yeah um I have no meaning like I think I'm on the record as saying

predictions are useless and it's more fun to be wrong than anything else. I really don't know how this game is going to go because I think there is a version of it where Notre Dame does kind of what Ohio State did, especially in the second half and just like puts the clamps down on Indiana's offensive line and offense and they can't, they just can't move. Can't move. Yes. And the Indiana defense, which is no slouch by its own on its own, gets hung out to dry. It has to stay on the field too Long has terrible field position, et cetera, et cetera. At the same time, I'm not going to sit here and tell you, like, that's definitely what's going to happen.

I think Indiana is full of wondrous possibilities. And I do think if Curtis Rourke is healthy in a way that he wasn't against Ohio State, that considerably changes the possibility of outcome here. Holly's doing something else I can tell. I have found. Okay, on the first page of results for Notre Dame Bowl on Etsy Past the Cotton Bowl

Bowl bowl is a glass Pyrex dish with the fighting Irish leprechaun etched into the bottom along with the words Notre Dame kick asserol Wow

Merry Christmas Spencer and then something called and again this is on the first page of results for the search Notre Dame Bowl Philadelphia Eagles bowl cozy what is a bowl cozy I'm so glad you asked I am going to read it

it looks like a pot holder with a convex curve made by Janine's creations bowl cozy is microwave safe it's made out of all cotton so you can place your bowl of food in the cozy and then place into microwave. It keeps you from having to pull a hot bowl

out of the microwave. You can even use it for your bowl of ice cream so your hands don't get cold. I can't think of anything I associate more with watching the Eagles at home and considering ending my life over football than bowl of

food. I like that you can put your bowl of food. Don't specify it. What? Okay, listen. I'm not trying to be, I'm not trying to be flip. Is taking a microwave bowl out with pot holders not a thing? Because I see a lot of these on Etsy.

I feel like this is I'm going to eat this in my lap. And I don't trust the pot holders. Okay, okay. No, that makes sense. That makes sense. I'm going to fucking eat this in my lap. Oh, my God. Okay.

Food out of my bowl. The very last thing on the front page, this is actually kind of sick, is a 1989 sun-kissed Fiesta bowl sweatshirture. that was Notre Dame versus West Virginia. I know that smells crazy. I almost want to buy this shirt just to smell it. Frame it for no reason.

Okay. Anyway, Merry Christmas, everybody. Tickets for this game are bonkers expensive, as you would expect them to be for Indiana playing a fucking playoff game. My only complaint, I'm on Sub Hub right now. The cheapest tickets that you can buy, are six hundred and sixty five dollars we were so close to doing something cool whoever listed these convenience fee convenience fee hold on let me see if i've turned fees on

or not i will buy the kick ass roll if this happens price display options include estimated fees unfortunately that sends the price skyrocketing to nine hundred and one dollars that's a lot that's that's an indulgence that's not a convenience fee we are in the wrong business where somebody is like, yeah, I made over $250. What did I do? I moved tickets from Notre Dame fans to Indiana fans, and that was it. Hey, Seat Geek used to exist. We could probably just make our own tickets company at this point. That's probably true. Literally, it doesn't seem hard. This is, yeah, I think, I do hope that this is an electric football game. I am going to be really bummed if Indiana

goes to a playoff game in Notre Dame fans like electric football game you say what a concept uh okay next ball on the increasingly stupid day of Saturday December 21st at noon

listed on TNT slash max I am not making that up either Number 11 SMU and number six, Penn State, college football playoff, first round game. Number two, being held at Bucolic Beaver Stadium in University Park, Pennsylvania. The University Park campus is located in state college, a borough and home rural municipality in Center County, Pennsylvania. It is a college town reading here, dominated economic.

Comically, culturally, and demographically by the presence of the Pennsylvania State University. Dominated. Happy Valley and Lion Country are also used to identify the state college area, including both the borough and townships of college, Harris, Patton, and Ferguson. Lots of cities are named lazily. Like, I'm not going to sit here. Like, Oceanside or rivers run or whatever. It's always water, clearly. Is state college the lazilyest name place?

I'm so glad you're asked. I'm so glad you asked. When it changed its name from Penn State College to Penn State University in 1953, its president, Milton S. Eisenhower, sought to persuade the town to change its name as well. A referendum failed to yield a majority for any of the choices proposed as a new name, so the town remains state college. They all threw up their hands and said, it's fine. I don't want to have to change my mailing labels.

State college it is forever. Watertown is still like the laziest name I've ever heard. Watertown. Watertown. I don't know because state college doesn't even have the word town in it. Sure. It doesn't even tell you it's a city or otherwise. It's just it has a college and it's in a state. That's it. All right. Some more information about the area. State College has a humid continental climate. Temperatures average 27.2 degrees Fahrenheit in January and 72.2 degrees Fahrenheit in July. annual precipitation averages 41.5.3 inches with 43.8 inches of annual snowfall on average.

The funniest possible weather outcome for this game would be 59 degrees in rain. I was going to say 53 and sunny. No, you're right. Where we spend all this time being like, oh, get ready for the big mean snowball of Big Ten country. And then it's like, oh, I guess I'll wear a jacket. Okay. Point of order. Okay. Remind me when we get two games down to come back to this because somebody brought up something interesting about this that I hadn't thought about before. But we'll wait for the Ohio State game. Meanwhile, you guys can talk about this while I am searching for. Okay. Okay. Okay. I've already gone to look for Penn State Bowl on Etsy. The first result is again the Philadelphia Eagles bowl cozy. The third result is a Penn State bong.

Inside you, there are two wolves. Which we are. I am putting this link in here. More like James Danklin. I'm going to spend so much money. I'm going to spend so much money during this episode. No, look at this thing. All right, premium glass pipe bowl.

Just to be clear. Premium. Oh, my God. Only three left. Arise by Christmas. Thank God. Oh, listen, that's a cute little, yeah. that's nice

that's just a clean little piece of glassware right there for 28 bucks that's a deal that's a deal yeah they're not so many old posties on this thing this is nothing I've ever heard of this is all you're gonna be getting in your ads now for the next month

and you see you know fine with me call me Andy smoke till Nikki I hate you I hate you know James Danklin was pretty good and I thought maybe you would stop there but it was I'm gonna keep going no we're gonna keep going No, you gave him one ounce of approbation.

Do either of you know the last time Penn State lost at home to a non-Big Ten opponent? No, but I do know that Split Zone duo thinks they invented the notion of Penn State being the first to lose a home play play play play play play play playoff game. We're going to have fun doing a joint live show with them. Yeah, especially when Stephen and Spencer play pickup basketball. Yep. Not happening. It's happening. A thing that's happening.

I think that's happening. The answer. to my query, UCF marched in to Beaver Stadium in 2013 and beat Penn State. That is the last time that a non-Big Ten opponent has beaten Penn State in their own building. SMU, on the other hand, their last win against a legacy Big Ten team on the road, a 21-20 win over Northwestern in 1970. SMU used to play the Big Ten teams a lot. And now they just don't. This doesn't, it almost, they, they played Michigan not that long ago, but most of the time, like, these are two groups that want enough.

And it kind of makes sense. Like, for so long, SMU was the face of, like, cheating and wrongdoing in football. So why would a big 10 team play them? Hmm. But I have found. Yeah, now you got it. I have found a personalized enamel bowl in Penn State Blue and White that says Dave's football snacks, but it's filled with tiny soccer balls. Oh.

I don't like these omens. There is a fun wrinkle on the Penn State's going to be the first team to lose a home playoff game. First of all, did we decide if it matters, like, if Notre Dame does it against Indiana, does it, because it's a day earlier, is that, quote, unquote, the first? Are we going chronologically? Or if they both do it in the first round, they're tied? I don't have an answer to that, but I have another ex-be-fined. Great question, Ryan.

what do you got on the second page of searching for pen state bowl is NCAA rolling tray sets with mask and tumbler which is exactly what it sounds like the first one's kentucky theme this is this is the jankiest thing i've ever seen hang on i'm going to put this in there um the whole pen state losing at home playoff game the problem is this if they win if they beat sm you and certainly that path is open to them nobody's going to care like it's not going to it's not it's not it's not really going to prove it's not really going to cast off anything about james franklin's tenure or this that and it's just going to be like well this is the team that should have been there in the first place couldn't even beat stupid old clemson blah blah blah blah blah strength essential this and oh who cares like

in some ways it will not matter i mean yes it's good to win a playoff game et cetera et cetera But it won't. Stupid old Clemson. Stupid old Clemson. Also, Penn State's offense is going to have SMU's defense in hell. Absolute hell.

Probably. They do not have the same, like, kind of horses on the phone. No, no. I see what you did there. Yeah. Yeah. Spencer, can you cue me up one more round

of podcast business, please? Podcast business. What's the business? Pocket's business. It's the business. Pocket's business. James Franklin doesn't do this because he'd have to count. And that's kind of hard for him.

Oh, my gosh. Spencer, thank you for bringing up James Franklin, who is the subject of this week's more or less, the special game we have, we play every week, sponsored by prize. Spex is a sponsor you'll hear about shortly. Holly, do you feel like playing or is Etsy too engrossing at this point? No, boy, I'm a team player. Okay. Unlike some people.

All right, Holly, James Franklin has six bowl. wins in his career as of the time of his recording. Well, that's interesting you say that. Okay. I'm going to name some coaches and you're going to tell me if they have more or less bull wins than that in their careers. Oh, Ryan, I'm going to like this, aren't I? I don't know. We're going to

find out. Oh, dear. Paul Johnson. More. Paul Johnson only has five bull wins in his career. That's less. That's okay. He didn't care about fake news. He didn't care about frivolous things like that. Dan Mullen Less

Dan Mullen has more Bull wins than James Franklin He has seven Wow Phil Fulmer More Phil Fulmer indeed does have more He has eight bowl wins in his career

Bo Schembeckler Less Bo Schembeckler has five Bull wins in his career He was awful And I can hear the Michigan fans screaming about there's definitely nothing to be thought

about the fact that I knew this one for a fact definitely not awful in bowl games Chip Kelly more Chip Kelly only has three Bull wins in his career wasn't a head coach like super long

in the in the aggregate but still not a lot in there and last but certainly not least Bob Stoops more like the Aggie get Big Game Bob more Bob Stoops Big Game Bob himself does indeed have more

10 bowl wins in his career over James Franklin's lowly six I am interested to see as I asked on a previous episode Does the national champion If you didn't get a buy If you play in the first round And you win three games

Is that three bowl wins now? Do you just like magically rocket up the bull win charts and rankings and he's like, who can we annoy them most by asking them this? Ryan, I have a counter question. I can answer a question with a question. Yeah.

Does my contract incentivize bull wins? Oh my God. Hey. Yes, they do count, says my agent. You owe me $800,000 for bull wins. That's the brilliant scheme.

Yeah, I got to give it to them. Spencer, if I don't have a incentive-laden kind, Where else can I go to enjoy some great money opportunities this bowl season? Oh, that means you can trundle on over to prize picks. That's right, prize picks. It's the best place to get real money sports action with over 10 million members and billions of dollars in awarded winning. Prize picks has made daily fantasy sports accessible to all.

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You're going to get a crack at doing more or less on so many good winners because of the extended college football playoff. You're going to get to decide whether Drew Aller is going to go more or less. in terms of touchdowns from you're going to get to decide whether uh nicholas singleton gets uh you know this many rush t ds or not you get to select more on ashton ginty which again i think you should just select more on all categories hell categories he doesn't even play in is ashton ginty going to have more or less than five sacks in a game more more he's he's just that talented um it is just that easy to play prize picks remember you can win up to 200 times your money and when you get that money, you can get it off MasterCard for quick and easy deposits into your account this

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As somebody who just went to Indianapolis for an event adjacent to the Big Ten Championship, That did look cool. It was cold, for sure. I will tell you that. And there were a lot of people bundling up in home field apparel gear. They looked cozy. They looked protected from the elements. They look stylish.

In all manner. And look, I feel I can say this. There are some cities you're going to go to and be like, boy, I'm worried that I can't be the most stylish person here. Indianapolis is not one of those cities. And if you're wearing home field apparel, guess what? You're going to be rocketing up the rankings with no effort whatsoever other than picking out cozy, comfortable, high quality apparel from the good brand. Should you buy something Indiana related in anticipation of their evisceration of Notre Dame? Probably.

I'm not going to stop you from doing that. I think it would be helpful to have it on hand, frankly. Hey, home field apparel, as far as I know, has never dressed. the wives of dictators for Paris Vogue in order to airbrush their images for the Western world. So that's just another leg up they have. Josh, if that is in the plans, please reach out and we will correct this ad for future purposes. Thanks, buddy. Like I said, offer code fullcast, 20% off your first order.

Go check it out today. Holly, do we have any other remnants of podcast business that we should hit before we continue through this 40 for 40? Ryan, I don't know what day this episode is dropping, so I'm going to say no. I can't multiply by seven that many times in my head. Our command of the calendar is unwavering. So where would you like us to go next? Hey, speaking of commanders and the calendar. It is now 4 p.m.

The date. Saturday, December 21st. The place. And TN Max for some reason. The thing. College football playoff first round game, number third. Number 12, Clemson, number five, Texas,

DKR, Texas Memorial Stadium, in Austin, Texas. Let's learn a little bit about our home site. The combined metropolitan region of San Antonio, Austin, has approximately five million residents. Austin is the southernmost state capitable in the contiguous United States, and is considered a gamma-plus-level global city

as categorized by the globalization in World Cities Research Network. As of 2024, Austin had an estimated population of 984,567, up from 961,855 at the 2020 census. The city is the cultural and economic center of the Austin Round Rock Metropolitan Statistical Area, which had an estimated population of 2,403-275,

as of July 1, 2023. located in central Texas within the greater Texas Hill country it is home to numerous lakes, rivers, and waterways, including Lady Bird Lake and Lake Travis on the Colorado River, Barton Springs, McKinney Falls, and Lake Walter E. Long.

Fellas, over to you. All right. I'm going to try to... And Jack shit on Etsy, by the way. What the hell, Texas? That's disappointing. Yeah. That's probably because Texas has, like, a staff of 300 lawyers actively

pursuing military action against people who infringe on the universe oh but i'll tell you what they didn't get they didn't get this souvenir texas bowl that has the alamo the san jacinto monument a sailboat for corpus christi three oil wells and the cotton bowl carved into it this might be my favorite one yet best 12 days of christmas yet um i think we have not wrangled with or at least i have not wrangled with Like spiritually? Yeah, I suppose so, actually. If Clemson, who I have no problem being in the playoff, I want to be very clear,

if they successfully make their way through the entirety of the playoff and win the national championship, we will have a three-loss team with a national title in college football. Did I or did I not, like, a month ago, say this as a joke? And we all left, although I think at the time I was talking about the Big 12. I mean, yeah, you might have, yeah. I was like three lost champion. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. To be clear, I love that this is possible.

So even in the years of like- Especially because it's not Bama. Even in the years of like split titles and weird things like that, the only thing you can sort of fumblingly grasp at to find a previous three-loss national title winner is 1981, Nebraska, which got a shared claim amongst like five other teams that season from the National Championship Foundation, which is one of those organizations

that goes back through the record books and says, yeah, we've decided this team deserves national championship season. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, does anybody know who Nebraska lost their bowl game to in the 1981 season? I know, hey, I know.

Michael Server. Too young. I know. I don't too young. Server, who is it? It was the Clemson. That's right. So seeing that bit of symmetry

makes me really think, like, makes me really think this is an interesting possibility. I don't, I think everybody will be okay with it because if Clemson does run the table, they will have won like three impressive games that get us there. But it'll still be weird. It'll still be one of the most like, oh, this is more like the NFL moments we've had to see a three-lossed team. I know how they'll do it too. You're talking about like winning a deep, every team, every score will be like 24 to 19.

And, like, the pivotal play will be like, K and Klubnick, QB, draw! I'm pre-irritated by this. Clemson's running defense has not been the best, I would say. It's okay. It's certainly not outstanding. Hey, their kicking's improved. Their kicking has improved.

I, yeah. That was a point for server. Oh, okay. Sorry, I thought you were raising your head. Yep. I did that. I have really weird. I have really weird vibes about Texas at this point.

I do, too. Why do you? They're not very good at protecting the passer. You saw that in the Georgia game, but even if you took all those sacks out, they would still be like 60th in the country and sacks allowed. They have like kind of a boom-busty feel. They are a team that's good at getting explosives, and Clemson is somewhat generous at giving up explosives. But, like, I don't know, something, maybe it's because, like, yours hasn't been healthy and now isn't going to get the extra time to rest that they would have had if they had won the SEC championship.

There is still something that just feels, like, not bad and not necessarily, like, it doesn't work, but it feels, like, slightly incomplete in some way. Does that make sense? Yeah. Yeah. So, so I don't know, like, this is not a Clemson team, especially this year. year like I don't think this is going to be one of those years where you're like oh my god Clemson beat them 40 to 7 like I don't think they have that in them I don't think they're balanced enough and I don't think Keg Klubnik has consistently put together like four good quarters enough for them

to do that but there is something that feels like a little rattley that's what it is is Texas feels like riding in a car where you hear a noise and you're like what is that like that wine before the tire blows yeah it's like maybe that's nothing Or maybe it's a problem. And that's just sort of the feel I have with Texas right now. Whereas Clemson, I know this car is fucked up. Clemson knows this car is fucked up. And it's kind of more comforting.

You got to use a coat hanger to open the door. Turn the key seven times. Like, server, am I giving a fair assessment? Should I be able to see the road through the floorboards? Don't worry about it. Hang on. Pull that carpet back. over the hole and you can't tell the difference it's letting all the heat out like is is this a

clemson team that even with the ACC championship they don't inspire significant degrees of confidence right I was starting my dad about this yesterday which is not or which is not a a good safe um thoughtful uh normal coherent place but clemson is very you are exactly right and we were like why do we feel good about this game? Why do we feel good about this matchup? One, no one expects us to win. Two, it really feels like we're due. No, it's fine. It really does feel like we're due to have a four-quarter game. We haven't done it all season. The Appalachian State game does not count. This was the worst Appalachian State team in probably 50 years. That game does not count. Even the NC State game in the second half, Clemson took their foot off the

gas and the defense gave up a lot of points to NC State. They have zero games where they've played four quarters of solid football. SMU is very close until the fourth quarter. Right. And then it almost went horribly wrong. I do think this Clemson team is capable of doing what they did against SMU for three quarters and then just not fucking up in the fourth, maybe just having one other thing go their way because it does feel like they've been in several games now, a couple plays away from, like, that being the complete game. That's my confidence here is that, like, okay, two weeks to prepare for a team that, like you said, doesn't predict the passer literally the only thing Clemson does well on defense is rush the passer. Yeah. That is,

and that is, that is something where I was about to say, if you want to point to one advantage, and I think it is just one decided advantage that Clemson has in this game, it's that their quarterback is still relatively healthy, and Texas is not. When you were's, the ankle is the known issue. If you told me there were other things like with his shoulder, I would totally believe that as well. I think he's soldiering through a lot of shit at the moment. I know the ankle has, you know,

he's got this weird brace that limits the motion so that his ankle can only move in one plane of motion. It can't really move side to side. It's braced. And he's played really well with that. But your quarterback's in much better shape than theirs. Yeah. I looked at the stats from the last time these two guys played against each other.

It was in a state championship game in Texas, and it really feels like regardless of the result, it's what the stats will very much be like. Quinn Ewer is through for three touchdowns, over 200 yards. He did have an interception and a fumble, I think, which pretty might not happen. And Cade Clubnick was 18 of 20, under 200 yards passing, ran for 97 yards, had one touchdown, and his team won. And it does really feel like Cade's not going to be the guy that wins. the game for Clemson, but just simply not falling apart might be enough.

Whereas at the same time, okay, he goes, let's say Quinn does go down, like Archmanning is primed and ready to take the top off of our defense. And I think could do that with his ability. Oh, I mean, you say that. Norris sellers-esque. With your defensive line, I have seen Archmanning live against a defensive line with some uh with with their piss hot and uh let me tell you if if it's a hot piss situation an archmanning gets thrown in yeah then uh it's not gonna be it's not good it's not good uh i don't

feel good about the positivity surrounding the tiger talk right now can okay can someone i'll i will wrap it in this neutral way i this is the one game amongst the four uh first round games where i feel like The halftime score doesn't matter at all. Close, lopsided. I'm just like, yeah, it's not going to... This is entirely going to be a, like, what the fuck happened in the second half kind of game, for somebody.

Ryan, I agree with you, but by that same token, do you think Dabo thinks Bivo's a graven idol? 100%. 100%. That's... But that's motivating. Oh. Next point.

Oh, boy. all right eight o'clock ABC and ESPN listen if ever there were any doubt we cut coming close coming close friends and neighbors coming close let me tell you something

if ever there were a doubt that the worldwide leader has it in for the Tennessee volunteers and wants them to suffer as much as possible if ever there were a doubt and there never has been, I would just like to point out

that they have Kirk Herb Street calling both of their potential playoff games before the title game, which he will also be calling. You mean Kirk Herb Street, the father of a Michigan quarterback commit? Is that what happened? Did that happen? I think the thing about that. That's accurate. Is it the one that's supposed to be good?

Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Well, listen, he hates Columbus and he hates Nashville, so now he can just move to Ann Arbor for a taste of a real college town. God. Folks, you can reach me at 38 Godfrey at 38 godfrey at www.com. This is actually the one he probably wants, so I won't tell you not to do that. This is the sun he wants?

Yeah, let's go with that. I did not prepare anything for this game intentionally, because I feel like there's no reason to like A Holly is here B we don't want to talk about it well like I think this I do think this presents like an interesting there is some element of like styles makes fights to this game oh oh absolutely I'm yeah I am very interested to see the you know they have had they have had problems creating a a full and complete offensive line all year. Tennessee's front seven has been famed throughout the season and rightly so for their prowess. Both teams have had a raft of injuries at key positions. Tennessee's receiver core is walking wounded, which is not necessarily what you want when you have a quarterback who is both built and running like a baby deer or like a haunted scarecrow coming to life, which is how my mother described him.

Uh, that said, I would probably rather be that baby deer than Will Howard at this point in time. Yeah, I don't want to, I don't want to look at James Pierce across the line getting ready to bump up his draft stock. No, thank you. Don't love it. There is also just like a weird element of like, what's the best Will Howard game you saw this year? Oh, Oregon? Probably. Yeah.

That's not a bad answer. Yeah. Do you remember how the Oregon game ended? It also ended with Will Howard, Ryan. Yeah. That's how it ended. Yeah. Yeah.

Like, Will Howard has had, I think, a perfectly fine season. But there is not, like, for lack of a kinder term, there has not been like, wow, what a magical this from Will Howard. It's a lot of, like, 270 yards, two touchdowns. And, like, in a different version of Ohio State, in like, Ohio State maybe. I don't know, 15 years ago, that'd probably be fine. But I do think there's some, there is some element of like, Ryan Day's Ohio State has seen much better and more like spectacular outings from that position that make that feel a little underwhelming right now. Driving with the parking break on. Yeah.

Ohio State gets the bong as the first search result for Ohio State goal. Never in doubt. Never. Not once. not once respectfully i i said this on the selection show but i don't i don't hate this path um this is probably if i if i had to pick my first round opponent uh from among the field this would probably would have been my second choice um in terms of vibes you really cannot find two teams further apart right now but it's tennessee and if there's one thing we know about tennessee football and that's

never been sure that it has been this year. It is that there is absolutely no way of discerning whether any element external or internal will or will not affect their play on the field. About the weather, we're getting pretty deep into the show, so this is probably time to confess. I have some cousins in the Ohio State Diaspora. Cousins, I actually love dearly. Hi, Karen. Hi, hi, Joe. I just about started listening all the rest of them. Hi, Emily. And my cousin pointed out something to me that I hadn't really considered, which is, you know, all the Ballyhoo about this one, like the Pennsylvania State College game, has been about the weather. And Joe pointed out something that I had not really thought of, which was Ohio State doesn't usually play these games either. They do not play a lot of night games.

They do not play football outside this time of year. Yeah. If we get into, which kind of, and you know, it's something that maybe you can gloss over in your brain because there are 17 NFL teams in Ohio that do play this time of year. So when you think of like outdoor football in Ohio, just as a whole, you know, as a genre, you naturally think of snow games that aren't typically being played by this team. so if we get like some real like nasty you know lake effect type whether or not that I would dare steal the valor of lake effect that could end up fucking up both teams night it feels casually it feels like that Tennessee is more comfortable or at least has a game plan that is more comfortable with that like I do know they like to take the top off and throw the ball deep you know five or six times of games. Yeah, but mostly it's listen at this finally at the end of the year.

I'm going to lay my sword against the throats of anyone who starts talking about. What is that? Guys, high rate offense. Fuck you. This is a power run team and it's been a power run team since August. You don't watch film. Watch the

linebackers against all of the little sort of games and responsibilities that they like to mess with in the run game here because that opens Hey, who's linebackers and who's they here? Ohio State. I'm sorry. Watch Simon and watch Sawyer and how they react to all of those, the play fakes, the polls.

Watch the linebackers and how they react to everything that Tennessee is trying to do in the run game, because that's going to open up all the stuff that they want to do and want to get downfield. And I'm not just talking about those big vertical passes that everyone misses from the Hendon Hooker offense. I'm talking about what they've been doing lately, which is they will be. pop out a tight end and roll for an easy five. Is Dylan Sampson going to fumble and is it going to be at a particularly ill-timed part of the game? Sure. Why not? Okay.

That's like, let's just get that. Frozen football? Sure. Why not? They don't have experience at that? Like, handshake meme, Dylan Sampson, Will Howard. Turnovers. Yeah. Like. Right. Right. Which is, by the way, I think that is this game. This is a big, ugly game.

There's going to be a lot of mistakes. The latest home game ever played at Ohio Stadium. I am ready for the most unbearable red zone turnover you've ever seen in your life in this game. Something ghastly. Yeah. I don't want to make it seem like this game will be a cakewalk. Like, I might not respect Ryan Day or Ohio State as an institution. I'm not going to think about how much of that is because it's like looking in a mirror.

But I respect the shit out of their players. They're talented. And it's not like they're not, I have a hard time thinking they won't get up for this game. Really hard time. I don't care, I don't care how bad it is in the locker room. I have a really hard time thinking they won't get up for this game. That said, don't start losing this one. If you lose it, lose it late.

No, no, start losing it. Start losing it early, please. Please. I don't think it matters truthfully. Like, no? I think because it's a home game, if you blow this late, it's gonna it's gonna be just as unpleasant like I don't if you blow this late I mean do you want the frog boil or do you want the immediate plunge yeah I think either way you're badly scalded frankly I'm gonna take I will say that I will just take this the frog boiling and late collapse because I think there's fewer opportunities for fights I that's it I understand that I guess there's players aren't going out there with pepper spray and their socks I you don't know voles that'd be a great touchdown in celebration um i i guess it's just oh this is going to come out early enough yes

my i guess mike matthews uh oh mike matthews nico dylan dante everybody i know you're listening right now max you too buddy uh just pretend to pepper spray your friends every time you score points it'll be funny that's uh oh my god just the i just the idea that you have put in my head of dillan you can't get flag for it it's non lethal and immediately pulling out pepper spray the offensive line all lining up like it's the reason i think it don't matter it doesn't matter if you lose late or early from just the like goodwill and you know maintaining your status perspective for ryan day is you are the on paper more talented team and like we are ohio state is oh okay oh no no oh i ohio state is and and this is like it's not a it's not necessarily this like yawning

between the two of them, but it will be another example of we lost at home to a team that we should be more talented then. It will kind of feel like losing to Penn State in some ways, I think. And I don't think it matters how you do it. I think it would, you know, if this was, if this was like a Georgia team that had missed the SEC championship, or if this was even Texas, you know, I think maybe you could say like, well, you know, these are the teams we have spot. to be. I think Tennessee is very good. I don't think this version of Tennessee is like, is a team that Ohio State sees as an equal. And this year is supposed to be the year for Ohio State. Mm-hmm. Life's funny. Anyway, it's funny. Next ball.

Oh, thank God. We're back to TerraFerma. And, well, the TerraFerma of Myrtle Beach. Monday Monday December 23rd 24 11 a.m. Get your ass up. ESPN.

Puk and rally God, the puk and rally bowl. Brooks Stadium Conway, South Carolina is very mean to put coastal Carolina in this bowl not because it's like

oh you get an extra home game because playoff teams get an extra home game that's fine. It's me. to put Coastal Carolina in this bowl because you are depriving a team that has never had the experience of it of seeing Myrtle Beach at

Christmas time it is listen if you've been to the Christmas mark to the famed Christmas markets of Europe if you've been to Stade Banff Man New York is Christmas

How is Myrtle Beach at Christmas time not a country song It has to be right It will be by the time Ryan by the time this episode comes out, it will be. It will be. Good. Great. Wonderful. Ha. Coastal Carolina and UTSA playing in one of the Baby Bowls in operations since 2020. The website has no events tab that we can see. I assume they just tell you it's Myrtle Beach. Get out there. I assume that's because then the cops know where to find you. Yeah.

But the offense list online. You can buy in this sad ESPN fronted website. Shirts. All sales are final. You can get better ones on the boardwalk. This is a waste. I'm going to complain about the bowl shops forever because the regionality of these games and regionality, as we all know, is what makes college football great, is being milled down into nothing.

ESPN would never do that. What are you talking about? Well, it's, the thing is, the thing that makes me crazy about it is that it would be so easy not to. Let whatever local organization is in charge of it, let them do the

store. You don't want to. You don't want to deal with the store. Look at the website. You clearly don't want to make a website. I have a feeling in Myrtle Beach somebody is making this exact store about 20 yards from the front gate. Yeah. Don't buy the shirts on the website. Kids, go get the air. Like, there's not an airbrushed logo in sight on this website. And that is a travesty on par with the vanishing monarch butterfly. I bet there's not a sleeveless tea to be found. Oh, you know, tank top. awaits you. Anyway, one last thing. I bet clear bag policy at the Myrtle Beach Bowl Stadium is a feast for the census. That's all. Of all the places to be enforcing NFL bag policy, just remember you asked for this. Football-wise, the advanced stats have these two very evenly matched, kind of across the board. Their defenses are not very effective.

Their offenses are better, but are still only middle of the road. These are two teams that I feel like have had moments in the last couple years where it's like, oh, my God, look at UTSA, look at Coastal. This is not the year for them in either regard. One thing they do love, and that will probably make this game, I have a good sense that this is going to be one of those games where you look up and you're like, how the fuck is the Myrtle Beach Bowl still on? These teams love penalties. Coastal, 104th in penalty yards per game this year. UTSA is 132nd.

There are barely more teams than that in college football. This is going to be, like, I am confident this is just going to be an absolute flag fest of a game and probably reasonably high scoring, but this has, Holly's right, this is the Pugh and Rally Bowl, and it will be appropriately messy in that. We don't, I think that is so appropriate. I'm glad they picked these teams. They both seem like exactly Myrtle Beach Bowl team. teams, both in terms of behavior and in terms of quality, we don't do enough weather shaming in terms of people having to survive a Myrtle Beach winter, right? Let's see if you're bad enough to come down here with 60% humidity and 58 degrees. You'll never know whether to wear

a sweatshirt or not, because you'll be slightly moist. You had nine beers the night before and 23 wings. The game's at 11, but at 945, you have to take the worst shit of your life the strange bathroom. Have you pissed yourself or is your crotch just that sweaty? You'll never know. Tough that out, Frosty. Holly, you're muted.

You're muted, Holly. Oh, I'm so glad that muted what I was trying to say at that moment. That's probably the best. Next poll. Yeah, was it something like you'll have to take a shit so bad it will make you limp? Because that's what will happen.

Nope. It was about getting fingered by a Carney on the Ferris wheel. Oh, no, she said it. Next bowl. Next bowl, please. And exhale. Folks, we are going to take you on a little bit of a guided meditation.

Everybody settle in. Folks who came to our Portland show, you've heard Ryan do this. And I cannot possibly live up to him, but I'm going to try my best. It's Monday, December 23rd. 24. It's 2.30 p.m. Eastern, and you're watching ESPN. It's Northern Illinois, 7 and 5, versus Fresno State, 6 and 6. Taking the blue turf of Alberts Stadium in Boise, Idaho. It's the famous Idaho potato bowl. You pull up the Idaho Potato Commission website. It's been a long year.

Life is hard. The future is bleak. And that's when you see it. The Idaho potato recipe blog has expanded to over 1,700 recipes. This is not necessarily always the greatest bowl game. But it has taken the mantle that was once held by the Beefo Brady's bowl with gusto and held onto it with astonishing force. The Dr. Potato Blog is also getting impatient. I'm not, I should back up every bowl, every 40 for 40 is someone's first.

The famous Idaho potato bowl, despite being owned by ESPN, maintains its own personality. thanks largely to its ties to the Idaho Potato Commission, which is like, you know, the mafia in Idaho, only delicious, and they only want good things for you.

They have a feature on it called the Dr. Potato blog, where you can ask potato related questions and they will tell you them, not unlike the Butterball hotline. And you can tell that the Dr. Potato blog is getting up there in internet ears because like all of us on Blue Sky,

it's getting a little impatient. I'm going to quote now. With 938 posts, chances are there's already an answer to your question. Please try searching below before submitting. Online takes a toll of us all. Here is the real welcome, however. Dr. Potato isn't a real doctor, but a team of potato experts ready to answer all your questions.

Have a question? Dr. Potato will be sure to get you an answer within a week. This is a better guarantee than any health care provider has ever. Provided me. Can I offer one pushback? Not to you, Holly, to the website. Go ahead. In 2024, given the people that are going to be in charge of our nation's health and welfare, isn't Dr. Potato a doctor? Isn't that, doesn't that feel right? Okay. Okay. Repost. Doesn't that act of pointing out that despite I having the title of a doctor, I am not an actual doctor. Doesn't that carry more inherent nobility? That's true. You're right. I, you know, I retracts my objection, thank you. That's all right. Dr. Potato forgives you.

There's a shop. This is the Idaho Potato Commission website, not the bowl website. I'm excited to make Dr. Potato forgives you merch, by the way. Just so you know. There's a shop. The Spuddy Buddy Stuffed Potato. Golf Club cover slash hand puppet is the star of the show.

And boys in. In lieu of the Beefo Brady's menu bowl quiz, we are trying something a little bit new this year. We're going to do the Dr. Potato Bowl recipe quiz in just a minute. And I know you've all been waiting for it, but we're doing a bonus quiz this year. I am going to give you a list of merch items available on the Idaho Potato Commission website, and you are going to tell me which one is fake. Okay. Page one.

a T-shirt reading Exercise I thought you said extra fries Real or fake Real Real Real Spencer This next one's for you

A baby onesie reading Homegrown in Idaho For your little potato Aw Yeah, that's real It is real. Ryan, a pair of socks showing sputty-buddy parachuting out of a biplane.

Huh, there's no reason why it shouldn't be real, so let's say real. Very true and a great attitude to approach the Idaho Potato Commission website store with. Spencer, a snow globe featuring tiny potatoes showering the giant Idaho potato truck, which carries the giant Idaho potato that we have talked about in previous years. That's so good. I'm just going to assume it's real. Fake, sorry.

No, it's going to be real. I'm manifesting it. But you know what? You can get a scale model truck carrying the big Idaho. I'm not apologizing for believing in dreams. No, you shouldn't. Ryan, a shirt in the style of the shutdown full cast South by Southwest apron

showing how to butcher a potato. Like the different cuts of potato? God, God, that's really good. It's so good. You know what? I'm going to, if it's not, I want it to be, so I'm going to follow Spencer's lead and say real. Nobody loves us like the potato bowl loves us.

Myrtle Beach, look what you could be. Look what you could achieve. Serber. Lightning round question, true or false? You can get a free potato pin if you're an Idaho resident on the Potato Commission website. More. Also true. Back to real or fake.

Spencer, French fry cup holder where it's a cup holder with a French fry box shaped attachment on top for you to put fries in so you can eat and drive. Fake. Real. Damn it. As real as God in the potato bowl. Ryan, a potato scrubber without. Eyes. Real.

Definitely real. Also real. Spencer, wildly impractical cutting board shaped like the state of Idaho. Real. Also real. Ryan, kitchen knife with potato-shaped handle. I will say it would be very fun to hit someone with a cutting board, this shape of Idaho. Sorry, what was the one that I have to decide is real?

Kitchen knife with potato-shaped handle. Fake. It is fake, because that would be impractical. Yeah, okay. Although the cutting board is also I will say I hesitate and I definitely saw a version of the knife that you described

in my mind. All right. Another new feature. What's in my kitchen? With over 17, they should pay us for this. Although we've been doing it for this long for free, I understand why they don't.

With over 1,700 recipes, there is a feature on the Potato Commission website now where you can plug in whatever you have in your kitten and it will show you a recipe you can make by adding potatoes to it. all right everybody roll your shoulders get your head adjusted you know potato pizza you remember the omish potato cinnamon roll you guys have been training for this it is the idaho potato commission doctor potato blog recipe quiz i am going to give you a recipe that is listed on the idaho potato commission website or one that i have made up and you are going to tell me Whether it is real or fake. Server, let's start with you.

Manhattan clam and potato chowder. Real. Real. Ryan, Halloween boo tatoes. Real. Real. These are little statues of piped potatoes with ghost masks on them. Spencer, potato lasagna.

Real. Real. Serber, potato pie brulee. Yes, real. Real and disgusting looking. Ryan, easy homemade potato chips and bubbly pairings. And bubbly pairings. Yep.

That's so specific, I don't think you made it up, so I'll say real. Real. Spencer, mashed potato cheddar waffles. Real. Real. Serber, potato mochi. Real. Ryan, potato popsicles.

Real. Fake. Spencer, Korean potato cheese dog. Real. Real and terrifying. Serber, roasted potato trees with loads of cheesy snow. Real.

Ryan, final question. Chocolate covered, Idaho potato and bacon sundaes. Real. Real. Oh, no. Real. Real. Real.

These people, the good people of the Idaho Potato Commission, faced the potential end of their own utility with the acquisition of their bowl game by ESPN and unlike some people, Bifo Brady's soldiered the fuck on. And if you don't believe me, you can ask them yourselves

because there's a chat bot option now down in the corner. Chat with Dr. Potato. Very briefly on this game from a football perspective. Hey, Northern Illinois is here. remember them from beating Notre Dame, the only team that's done it so far this year as the time of this recording. They have a top 15 scoring defense. They are top eight in yards per play on defense. They're 121st in red zone possessions. They do okay if they manage to get there. They are 106th in offensive plays of 20 plus yards. This is, they are not

going to put up 40 points. Fresno State, on the other hand, has been very bad in the second half the last month they the fact that they even got to bowl eligibility was extremely rocky they started 5 and 3 then they blew a 20 to 7 lead in the fourth quarter to Hawaii at home they lost to an Air Force team that is not super

impressive this year and they survived not scoring in the second half at all to be Colorado State 2822 to get win 6 this will feel I suspect like eating half of the

items that Holly listed from the rest of the blog. I think that's that's going to be the visual equivalent here. Next and final bowl of this episode. One last thing. Okay. Yes. I hope the chat bot just has one response. Potato. Potato. These are experts, sir. But it does it in different tones and chirps and whistles like R2D2. Do you have an 11-hour Christmas music playlist and on my two and a half hour journey that should have taken 45 minutes today. R2D2, we wish you and Merry Christmas, came up three times.

Oh, that's a lot. I feel like God's trying to tell me something, and I feel like when I figure it out, I'm not going to like it. You know what he's trying to tell you? That's Hawaii Bowl time. It's Hawaii, so a little, like,

pedal steel guitar there. It's December. 24th. It's Christmas Eve, babe. In the drunk tank. And on ESPN, it's 8 o'clock and it's Hawaii Bowl time. This game has always been a little bit sad and weird and shabby. But I'll tell you what, nothing gets you out of church like the looks your family gives you when you tell them you have to watch the Hawaii Bowl instead of going to Midnight Mass. It's for work. Are you proud of me? The Hawaii Bowl keeps getting

knocked down in its history. The Hawaii Bowl, it's very quick to tell you, is not affiliated with other bowl games previously staged in Hawaii. There are games that have been through multiple sponsors like the Bifo Brady's nay, magic Jack Bull.

Hawaii keeps generating and then collapsing entire bowl organizations. A brief list of games, the current Hawaii Bowl is not associated with includes the Poi Bowl from 1936 to 1939, the pineapple bowl, which ran twice 1940 to 1941, then broke off for some reason, resuming in

1947, 1952. By the way, for a good time, look up who won the Rose Bowl in 1942 and where it was played. The Aloha Bowl from 1982, 2000, and the Oahu Bowl from 1998 to 2000. How did those exist? We'll get to that in a minute. Also not related to the Hula Bowl all-star game. While the Aloha Bowl tried to move to San Francisco and was decertified by the NCAA, the Oahu Bowl moved to Seattle and was held for two years as the Seattle Bowl before it lots to certification in 2002. Additionally, this game, like Hawaii football games, is we're not going to go into all the

shenanigans and infrastructure collapse and physical collapse. that led to Hawaii playing their football in a glorified municipal complex on the Manoa campus. The Hawaii Bowl game is also being played there. Anyway, players attending it do get to go to a royal luau. These players are from South Florida and San Jose State. So they're both like, we're at the beach, but we want to see a real beach, but this one's better. So that's fun for them. There's a bit of a rabbit hole happening on the website.

This, again, is owned by ESPN. If you dive down to the bottom, you see something that you don't see on any other ESPN bowl website that I've seen so far. And that is a bowl season pick-em. If you click on it, you see a giant Scooter's coffee sticker in the corner. You heard about them last time. It's just a pick-em game for all of the bowl games, sponsored by go bowling.com, which again is about bowling, not college football games. This whole thing has a, and it's fitting for the Hawaii Bowl, and it's fitting for the

time, and it's fitting for it being the last preview of this episode, because the whole thing has a real air of, we'll get to it after the holidays, and setting an out-of-office message on December 10th, which in fact is what we were about to do. USF and San Jose State did not beat a bowl eligible team in their schedules this year. And they get rewarded by going to Hawaii. This system is great. Ryan, I have breaking news. They're gonna.

Yes, one of them is going to. Something you got to give. One of them is going to. U.S.F was much worse when they did it. They played five teams that made the postseason. They only averaged 10 points a game in those contests. San Jose State played there's a lot closer. They have a two-point loss to Wazoo, seven to Colorado State,

11 to UNLV, a game that was close into the fourth quarter. San Jose State is also kind of a special team's mess, and their third down defense is very, spotty. So this to me feels like you're going to turn this on and be like, okay, San Jose State jumped out to a comfortable lead and then USF's going to clawback. And then, yes, Spencer, one of these two things is going to no longer be true and one of them will have beaten a bowl game this college football season. That's what you can tell people. You have to decide which one is worse on Christmas Eve. You have to tell them, I don't believe in God and I don't want to go to

church, or I want to watch the Hawaii Bowl. Which one is worse? You decide. Tell them, here's what you do. I've actually done both in the past 10 years. Tell them you're supporting Ken Neumato Lolo, who used to be a troop, and therefore it's your patriotic duty to watch the Hawaii Bowl. And also, you know, by gate revenue and whatnot, you're indirectly supporting longtime EDSBSB hero, Timmy Chang.