Shutdown Fullcast - Boat Law, Coastal Carolina, and You

Episode Date: December 7, 2020

--Coastal Carolina and BYU played the Game of the Century --We learn about CCU's best majors, Theft and Rhetoric --Don't let your friends take the South Carolina job! --Dusty Rhodes should have played Gandalf in LOTR --Iowa State is currently having their best season ever --Another edition of "Spencer Knows Musical" Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to the shutdown to the shutdown fullcast. You are listening to the internet's only college football podcast this week we're going to expand that purview a little bit because you know we're real good and staying on topic i spencer hall do pronounce this here podcast to be a coastal carolina podcast slash myrtle beach tourism promotional my favorite myrtle do you know another myrtle it was a joke about true crime i don't know another myrtle I've never met one in real life. Guys, just let him go. Joining me, as always,

you just heard the dulcet tones of one Holly Anderson. Jason, my co-host, how are we doing? So I'm looking at Coastal Carolina University's notable alumni section of the wiki.

Oh, this is rich. It's good. What's the ratio of athletes to all other people? It's a solid five to one that's how you know it's a good school that's that's a good school we got an NFL NFL fullback on here uh I got a big time golf guy etc etc I do have a quibble because diamond Dallas page is not listed among the athletes former WCW champion is down here

with arts entertainment and media and yoga master yeah he has transitioned to aging men's health specialist also Bailey Hanks who I'm guessing is the dean of the law school. She won MTV's Legally Blonde, the Musical, the Search for L. Woods. So, I mean, I think that's as good as a law degree. Coastal Carolina, one of the top law schools in the country. Says so right there. That's also one of their top majors is my favorite combination.

Speech, communication, and rhetoric, which I'm going to go ahead and say at Coastal Carolina means Mike Skills for Wrestling. I think yeah that's by rhetoric we mean hollering yeah it's like you can you it's like half of the classes are just entering a room and going yo listen up you you you broke sons of bitches

yeah it's all yeah talking shit about Columbia South Carolina I like to think that it's yeah that's it's just talking shit the major Ryan Nanny is joining us as a guest hey Ryan Have you ever been to Myrtle Beach?

I've been once in February. Yeah. Which is not the time to go. I will tell you. Like it's lukewarm. No, it was straight up cold. Oh, but that's okay. You're on the beach.

So there's no one. No, the cold beach sucks, as it turns out. It's bad. Yeah, we did, Evie had a gymnastics thing there this February, or late January or whatever it was. And yeah, it's downright hawth out there. It's no fun at all. It's like hawth with a fud ruckers.

Which I think hoth with a fud ruckers, it's a provocative concept in the Star Wars universe. Well, they do have animals they carve up. You could pull you a fud ruckers out of one of them things. Fud ruckers, and you thought it smelled bad on the outside. General Grievous is actually a coastal Carolina alum. Except instead of lightsabers, it's just pitching wedges that he stole off of golfers. That's an honorary degree, actually.

Well, they got lightsabers with their teal. Well, that's why he has the like double weird lightsabers. Those are actually nunchucks, which is a phys ed credit at Coastal Carolina. My major, my major was pitch and wedge handling and theft and rhetoric. That's it. You say theft and rhetoric? Thief and rhetoric. Top majors at Coast of Carolina.

But I repeat myself. other schools they call that political science that's like talking your shit out of a charge talking your way out of a charge is theft and rhetoric yeah that's officer now you listen up it's a strong use of y'all won't believe

this but it's a powerful there's a whole grad course and y'all won't believe this but I lived in Myrtle Beach when I was a kid like when I was real little can you really real quick list every city you've lived in no because it was

be a window into my soul and coward are you saying that yeah i really feel like other people need to know why he thinks all good things are terrible um so like are there certain windows in the the history that uh perhaps there are still legal um and don't and no i don't i don't have any there's no outstanding words yeah i'm not that interesting according to holly um so the places i have lived are the following i have lived in uh let's see franklin tennessee i've lived in columbia south carolina i have lived in myrtle beach south carolina i have lived in canesville florida i have lived in palm harbor florida we don't talk enough about the toll that managing a mrs winters takes on a family uh well i think we're doing it right now uh i've lived in

I've lived in Kennesaw, Georgia. I've lived in Alpharetta. I've lived in Roswell, Georgia, and I have lived in Atlanta, and I have lived in Jai, Taiwan. You have the resume of a linebacker's coach who's very bad with people. And the personality. And the body. And the smell. Including the Taiwan portion.

That's true. like what that's it you're like yeah my only head coaching experience was this like

jv Taiwanese football team division two Taiwanese touch football this man's with the Ted lasso of Taiwan except at the end

I throw the dart right into someone's forehead and I have to leave yeah that's that's that's pretty much it yeah

I would do that right they'd be like well did they pay you and they're like well i got food they said if you come here we'll pay you in food so i went it was pretty great so yeah that's that's my resume a place to live burtel beach was one of them i'm told that um i have vague memories of this i crawled into a drain pipe on the beach and had to be fetched out fetched out with with what um coercion i think it didn't take like an implement hot dog on a fishing pole hot dog on a fishing pole catch you a spencer nice and easy with a hot dog on a fishing pole

that didn't that didn't work go get the corn go get the corn dog on a fishing pole this is actually how they invented the corn dog on a stick franchise this is spencer's dad's origin story it's a rescue device you know myrtle beach you know the merdle beach like beach police already have hot dog and corn dog on a fishing pole not specifically for me but because that works on most locals, right? Like, distract him. Hot talk about a fishing pole. I smell it.

One of those is a taser, but I can never remember which. He'll bite it into it. He'll get me. Yeah, he'll buy it into it and he'll go limp. It'll be amazing. Yeah, the reason we're talking about... I don't feel good. The reason we're talking about this is because game of the year happened.

And it didn't happen in Ann Arbor, Michigan. Certainly not there. Well, there's been some pretty memorable. Let's not discount the games that have taken place so far this year in Ann Arbor. That's true. But it didn't happen in any of the standard canonical cathedrals of this sport we call college football. No. No, the best game of the 2020 season to this point happened in Conway.

South Carolina, and it happened between Coastal Carolina and BYU, and it was scheduled in three days. I love this game so much. Everything about it was absolutely delightful, including the fact that BYU traveled 3,000 miles all the way across the country to go to Myrtle Beach when it wasn't real warm, and then to get absolutely battered and dragged by a team

named after a fancy chicken. And that's what... And fight, too. And fight some locals. Well, yeah, I mean, there's got to be something in it for BYU. Sure, right? Respect our culture.

I bring you good news! Like, well, at BYU, it's like, hey, will you come here on short notice to play football with us? And BYU is like, You need to sweeten the deal, and, you know, CCU's like, we like to fight. BYU's like, bet. See you there.

We have no vices. I think you got one. I think you like to fight. Well, that was true. We'll be there. We'll be there on Saturday. They just told their trucks, like they told their equipment trucks. Ross Delinger had an article about this.

They told their equipment trucks to just drive to the Carolinas. they weren't specific they just said you don't have to be okay we already had this discussion this is not as remarkable as it sounds you don't know enough truckers it's probably true I think we could all stand it

like we could all stand to be friend a few more truckers all I am saying is that like you don't have to worry about where in the Carolinas until the last you know eight hours of this three day drive and Myrtle Beach is not like

ooh secluded high like mortal beach wants you to know it's fucking there I just like the implication that maybe coastal was going to cancel so they were going to if that didn't work they were just going to call up like app state and be like hey you guys played on Thursday or Friday

right you want to double up you feeling spry we could go with that hey Wofford we're in your neighborhood come outside Wofford drop a pin Terriers we're just going to start

issuing fight challenges to somebody in the greater carolina's like area duke duke canceled their game with miami to play b yu yu y'all this is a religious school we're actually lucky they didn't turn up at some that like clemson and just you know to carry holy war it would have been very funny if miami had gone to duke thinking they were going to play duke and duke was like psych motherfuckers b yu you're playing instead have fun oh they have the same colors and everything yes I think that's probably way better than what actually happened to Duke this weekend. The annexation of Panera bread. We sent our second like a Carolina gentleman would.

Enjoy the duel. BYU would actually get along real well in Chapel Hill. I like that so Duke can sub out for BYU because they have the same uniforms. Because of Carolina doesn't have that luxury. No. They would be forced to sub in. Well, that's the thing. They would be forced to sub in the Jacksonville Jaguars.

and you don't ever want to do that. Oh, no, we don't want to do that. You don't want the Jags representing you. The Jags face off against BYU, and they think, are we supposed to lose to them too? Like, is this, is this tank? Is this part of the tank? Tank or no tank. Can we smoke during this game?

And then BYU's like, we like to fight, and the Jags are like, cool. We came to a right place. I have a strong feeling coastal Carolina players smoke on the sidelines. Like unfiltered American spirit smoke on the sidelines. I roll my own. There's some 19-year-old on Coastal Carolina who rolls his own cigarettes. I guarantee you this. There's a 19-year-old in every school that rolls their own cigarettes.

Not a BYU. That'd be a violation of the Honor Code. You know what is... Not if you don't smoke them. That's true. Wow. BYU law grad, Jason Kurt. Thanks.

I'm going to be competing for the L. Woods musical. Coastal... Man, the words Coastal Carole. Carolina law really make my blood run cold, though, when I think it's like, it's all boat law. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's just Kenny Powers on a jet ski. You just memorize that picture. Or it's just evangelical overlord law, right?

Yeah, right. Yeah, okay. Here, you got a million dollars in cash, and you need to get it from point A to point B without the feds getting to it. What do you do? What do you do? I put it on a boat. That's right. No, when your law professor says, what do you do?

He's got some urgency in his voice, right? Like, I need you to tell me before they break down this door. The sheriff's right outside. This is not a, this is not a test. Hurry. Let me give you a hypothetical. Let's say you're teaching a law class on some kind of insanely powerful meth. Just an idea.

Just floating this idea. Hypothetical. We're all on a boat right now. You owe money to Big Stanky. He's a guy like, you know, out in Charleston. Don't worry about whether he's real or not. He's real. You swindled an old lady out of a storage unit that has stolen European art inside.

What do you do? Now, let's say you've established a fake university called Coastal Carolina. It's strictly hypothetical. That's the name of it. What's step two? Step two is win the college world series. that's yeah and then nobody then nobody and then that's like trump winning the election like oh shit we're a real school now

right like ah fuck now we got school stuff what do we need to do well first we need some colors okay take teal the most popular color of 1991 it reads very much like they called the ncdbill and they're like hey so uh we're getting a college football program started and they're like great let's uh let's run you through the list of colors that are still available it is a thin list you should know well i like the 19 anything because like you know any a school you want to look older than you are right you want

latin in the creed and you want you know the the the school crest to look like it was designed by romans and all that shit well coast carolina which was invented eight minutes ago they look back to the ancients you know the charlotte hornets right that's that that's their idea of the classics oh yeah so who is ancient to a current car a current coastal carolina student larry johnson right i'm going somewhere with this asshole go ahead your parents right Yeah. And well, what was the, what was the biggest, you know, cultural landmark when your parents were kids? The Charlotte Hornets. I think in the Coastal Carolina creation myth, it's the great grandmamma in the sky that is shaping the land. Her name is Mrs. Winners.

She's a Tamagochi. It's a digital pet you can keep in your pocket, but also our God. See, I think they should swing the other way and start, like, saying like, yep, we're, we're. South Carolina's oldest football team, we are, we just are, and then when somebody else gets mad about it, just be like, look at you, fighting with us, idiots. I think Coastal Carolina should have a deep long rivalry with Florida Gulf Coast University. I do hope that they start leaning immediately into South Carolina's only undefeated college football team. I don't know.

Furman. Is Furman Is Furman even playing? That's called undefeated, sir That's not how it works Otherwise, UMass could have been undefeated Why didn't you tell them that?

I have out-lawyered each of you so far That was UMass's choice Don't blame you mass for Don't blame me for you mass's choices Damn, Jason, this coastal Carolina law degrees turned you into a mind samurai Yeah, next, who's next? Pretty genius.

You see, the problem with pretending to be the oldest college football program in South Carolina is it's going to be about eight minutes before you get Clemson trustees in your mentions bragging about having owned slaves right yeah yeah it's you're not milkshake duck enough yes um I think also well Clemson fans are going to say actually the universe was created 10 years ago Genesis says so sure do you even have a building named after the bondage and enslavement of your fellow humans Coast Carolina's like, no, we have, we have the Hardy Student Union. We have the dance of the ancients.

That's a different kind of bondage. We have the dance of the ancients we perform to honor our ancestors, the macarena. It's an ancient song and dance. The thing I love about this game is that it was a really mean, hard-hitting game where both teams were scraping and screaming. like scratching and clawing at each other for the better part of the first half and then it got more intense i've never seen such hostility out of nowhere i know a lot of rivalries land flat on their face because we have such expectations for them i feel like the reverse happened

here were two teams that had no reason to dislike each other or play with the content you should reserve for a vaunted foe happened instantly between these two teams because Because I don't think BYU expected to get off the bus and have to bust out the bats and razors as quickly as they did. And everything changed because the moment that things really sort of kicked up a degree was when, and you know where I'm going with the Sack Wilson through an interception on a Hail Mary attempt at the end of the first half. So really he started it.

Sure. Yeah. I'm going to use my Coastal Carolina law degree and say, Absolutely. He did start it. I mean, if he's thrown a better pass, we wouldn't have had all those problems. That's true. And once the pass is intercepted and a return begins, which it did, and a coastal Carolina player returned it and began moving up field. With some success before getting tackled around the 40-yard line,

Zach Wilson went from protected quarterback, whose safety is somewhat insured by rule. He went from that to open, the other thing, open normal football player on a kickoff return who can be smashed, pummeled, and driven into the ground, just like everyone else. Do you know what is great about this particular moment in the game, Spencer? It is that the two Coastal Carolina players closest to Zach Wilson at the time realized this at about the same time everyone else did watching at home, which means that you didn't even have to watch that closely, to see the little cartoon exclamation point light up over their heads.

They did the Metal Gear exclamation point. Yeah, they spotted a threat. He was a threat. Man's wearing a headband. That's a football player. If you don't want to be tackled, don't wear a headband. And again, he started it.

I'd forget who the other player is, but one of them is 94, who plays bandit on their defense. Jeffrey Gunter, one of the guys was like, hey, I'm going to go black the quarterback, and Jeffrey Gunter was like, I'm going to kill everyone he loves. Don't fight it. Don't fight it, Jeff. Like, just broadly.

I think it's important for young people to set manageable goals. Because they double teamed, they double teamed him and pounded him into the turf. Then what? And then did it again. And then Jeffrey Gunter began to do it a third time. And at this point, the ref kind of hauls him off like he's picking up a kitten by the scruff of his neck. And he doesn't actually seem to be that upset. It's like, you know, son, don't play with your food. So since Coast Carolina is established as a Rassland University,

the first move, the takedown of Zach Wilson, that was a rock bottom. That was the rock's pre-finisher. Yeah. With the arm, the falling clothesline. And then dude came in and dropped the people's elbow on him. So we got an entire rock match while Zach Wilson was just trying to get off the field. That's all Zach Wilson isn't trying to do anything but get up. he's just trying to get away from the situation

and they keep basically like showboating him in the middle of the ring and we're only laughing because this changed the entire game we're also laughing because it was hysterically funny but it changed the entire game it really did because after that point one coastal Carolina the governor was off

I think they were just like hey we can hit everyone anytime anywhere I think this was to the point where b yu realized they had traveled on short notice to myrtle beach where it's too cold to put putt and none of them can drink so like god damn it why did we why did we come here dad also also i thought we were just going to play this cute little team from carolina and it turns out we just signed up for fight club oh right that's the hermit crab and it pinched me that's the other part of it is that the reason this game happened is because the national media has been like, gosh, BYU sure does, you know,

if it feels like you should schedule a little better, maybe you can speak. Not even supposed to be here today. Yeah. Yep. Well, it's really funny that BYU's best solution for this was to play a team that didn't exist like 15 years ago, right? Yeah.

And like that's actually true and valid. This was the right idea by BYU. But maybe the fight should have been in the parking lot beforehand they should have played they should have played Washington Washington is worse than coastal Carolina at this point yeah I don't know if that gets you anything though no but but you know what you don't do you don't lose in Myrtle Beach then they tried to play Washington though they that I don't know exactly what happened there they sort of like said maybe we'll think about it and then by then Washington was like

yeah we'll go do something else because I think what that was a week Washington played was it Utah yeah because it was the big the big comeback game so like yeah b yu wouldn't have got that because because utah was going to screw b yu out of a game against washington how about that because utah's in a power conference so it's utah's fault i heard that about this coastal carolina beat down of b yu is a transit of utah win is all thanks to utah also i love that it's 2217 um and it came down to the wire b yu had a chance to win at the very end but fuck all that shit this was a beat down we all saw it i mean uh when one when the winning team runs 54 times and only

passes 15? Yeah. Yeah, man. Because this is the coastal triple option. This team is the most NCAA A14 playbook I've ever seen in real life. It's awesome. It is. And Grayson McCall, Grayson McCall,

his name is Grayson McCall. That's the Coastal Carolina quarterback, right? Grayson McCall of the Conway South Carolina McCall's. He he's like perfect for this system he put a smooth fake pitch juke on a b yu defender that had me laid out like i had to just kind of like take a deep breath speaking of laid out he pitched once

over a dude who was laying it like b yu number 11 was diving and he pitched over him i have never seen that before yeah you tune into coastal game you see some cheer no dude dude was absolutely amazing and he wasn't even their best rush c j marrable is their best rusher It's just Grayson McCall was nice with it. That's the best way to put it. That's the triple option quarterback who is nice with it all the damn time. And physical, because everyone on Coastal Carolina really likes hitting you. Something BYU clearly sometime in the fourth quarter was like, we're very tired of this.

They have forgotten the face of their father, by which I mean Bronco Mendenhall. Like, what's it like to? First of all, by the way, before you at me, BYU fans, A, you can reach me. at 38 godfrey b if you don't want people laughing when your team gets punched in the dick a whole bunch of times on national tv maybe don't field years and years and years of a team famed for nothing more often than punching other people in the dick thank you that's check off stick everyone knows that yeah checkoff's nut punch it was real funny watching coastal carolina team due to BYU, what BYU teams in their Bronco Mendenhall Prime did to everyone else.

I'm just, I'm just real. Again, I'm referring to dick punching. I'm just real proud that a team from South Carolina finally played exactly like people from South Carolina act. That's everything I love. Thank you. Yes. That really is it, isn't it?

Yeah. No, what are they? It's just a mean kind of tricksy, triple option team that just punches people right in the gooch. If Loki had not been adopted by Thor's family but when the frost giants like kicked him out or whatever i know he's not jason i'm fucking this up but i'm sorry about it okay if loki had not been adopted by odin but instead had been had tumbled sideways through time and ended up in the eastbound and down universe that's a shana

clear absolutely that's a south carolinian yeah and it's about time that somebody finally embraced the full brand which by the way they do because what's their locker room celebrations rasslin That's what the Shana Clearers do after games. They drop elbows on each other through tables in the locker room. I think every team in the Sunbelt does that. It's awesome. Like Georgia Southern's coach is out there belt and shit with folding chairs.

I don't ever feel like we're watching the wrong Carolinas play football? As the official, as the, I mean before last night. As the official sponsor of Sunbelt football, Mid-South Airlines has long recognized this synergy. BYU, you, you best stay your ass out of Conner. way south carolina now i'm picturing will must champ struggling to unfold the ladder it's taking the ladder and beating the floor with it in the assumption that the briefcase is

underneath the ring it's an extended ladder but just let him tire himself out well hey listen will must champs always won that money in the bank match though always that's depressing so depressing i think so that's the one where like someone knocks it down and he picks it up i earned this I did this every time I did it I went 16 to 24 give me $16 million

bucks that's not even a joke like we don't even have to joke about that we're just like you just have to read what he did and how much money he got for it that's the Uber

oh god what's South Carolina's athletic department budget for next year running out right now negative two negative two million or so it's a negative number and it's pretty high i can't remember it specifically i can't decide if

it's actually 50 million or if i'm just being dramatic it's okay they only have to pay the new coach three million so only three mill i have something to say about shame beamer that i want to get off my heart please speak on it all right i'm going to have i'm going to have some stipulations first you all ready um before we go into this conversation uh stipulated let's take us back right ryan that's what that means right Correct. Okay. Stipulate first that this search so far for South Carolina has not sounded super promising, right? That it does not sound like they want out to go. They want to go out and get any of maybe the actually interesting young coaches out there and instead want to slide Shane Beamer on over into that on his daddy's coattails, right? here's the thing

and I'm not saying that South Carolina is right to do this I think it is dumb the way they're doing this I'm not sure that anybody else who is not a fairly young guy and some sort of coach's son could survive the South Carolina job

like the process sucks but do you want anybody you actually like to take the South Carolina line a job because that's going to kill somebody hell no it's impossible like i'm not sure anybody who shame beaver's going to have jobs wherever he wants in coaching for the rest of his life up to and you know beyond any kind of major malfeasance being discovered on his part good afternoon hugh freeze stop texting me uh this this gig right now feels like it can only be survived by someone who's going to be bulletproof no matter what now that's not an excuse for the way they

conducted the process but i kind of don't want a promising coach to take this job i want the promising coach to take a promising job don't you yeah this is not a promising job i think we should make lou holts do it again yeah yeah that's fine here anyway did i did i convey that like i'm not happy with the way they've conducted this but if they get shame beamer i'm like he might have the best chance of anybody of surviving whatever the fuck is going to happen to him this is kind of a play stupid games by which i mean he's going to get paid and leave in twenty twenty four play stupid games win stupid prizes kind of thing um here is the only telling thing about shame beamer's hiring because i have no idea if it's going to work or not

i suspect most of the things that people are saying to get excited about it here occurs real well and he's been here before like could be said about a lot of his kids got how far that goes with spencer here here is here is the most telling thing and you can for this however you want stephen garcia is fucking amped for this higher if you made a decision if you made a business decision and you found out through the great fine that stephen garcia was fucking excited about the house you bought or the car you leased what if i'm buying a shipping container of swords in that case i think so what it depends well no it could be personal i'm not here to judge no it's oh it's personal i i would i would have a moment

moment of pause if I made a multi-million dollar decision and somewhere publicly Stephen Garcia was like fuck yeah dog you fucking killed it I'd be like oh no I'm ruined oh boy you always need to know who's on like you always need to look around and see like who's cheering you on right that's that that's if you're in the situation you're like man these people are loving it you're like go look and see who these people are very important I shouldn't have bought this this decommissioned airline shit why did they do that's okay

we're all turning to mid-south airline we'll expand it we'll fly from Myrtle Beach to Myrtle Beach I think it's going to the air and come down Stephen Garcia him being on board that is critical to winning back the Myrtle Beach recruiting away from the Costa Carolina because like apparently they got good football players

there South Carolina weren't they on your team maybe you should switch to teal it's a fair point Stephen Garcia of course originally from Tampa, Florida. Stand up. That's the same thing. That's the same thing. The Myrtle Beach of Florida. You got a lot of

Myrtle Beach. It's all It's half the state is It's Ocala and then all Myrtle Beach. What was the algorithm I did last night in Discord that South Carolina is half Florida and half Tennessee but that North Carolina

is also half Florida and half Tennessee but then also half Virginia? Yeah. This is the trick. Carolinas do not have personalities of their own. I think there is. Banking is a personality. Just barbecue. Like they got, they got 1,800 distinct barbecue sauces, and that's it.

Cookout might be a personality. That's true. It's mine. Eggnog shake. Yeah. Seasonal shake might be my personality. Master seasonal shake. Master shake, but North Carolinian, that's.

it's quite wow damn shake but make it seasonal um i do know that they were talking at one point to tony elliott who tony elli is clemson's offensive coordinator really highly regarded assistant see why would you want that for him yeah see tony elli is not dumb tony wasn't going to take that job even if it was even if it was in the bag and it was like hey it is yours to take that it's also mine to turn down because that is a That's a dead. I want to say dead end. I'm going to say this out loud. I'm sorry. Go to Vanderbilt. You want to level up into the SECE so bad.

Go see if you can get that Vanderbilt job because that is way likelyer to succeed. Damn. Is it that? I'm not arguing. I'm just saying out loud, is it that bad that you would rather take the Vandy gig than take the stuff? I would. Vandy don't got to play Clemson. Vandy also don't got to play Texas A&M every year. Vandy also. That's going to start to suck. a lot yeah he also gets to play like post kiffin scandal old miss they get to play tennessee yeah that's true south carolina gets to that too and it's not usually that stressful um there is one there is one part of the south carolina hiring process that i really really enjoyed

and that was the part where scott satterfield made louisville fans fucking hate his guns this dude so like he wants out of there so bad y'all this is not angling for a raise he wants out of there so bad it it had already been uh there are already complaints from louisville fans about him like you know rumors being floated or whatever right right and you know everyone is assuming this is like agent floating trying to get a new deal it's not and then it comes out that uh he had a conversation with south carolina gamecox who happened to be in the market to hire a new football coach uh and it of course there was no interest in in seeking the job or taking the job just you know talking to them about their vacant job that is the same title in the dark and now he's done the thing that Justin Fuente did where you like flirted a little too publicly with a job that's not quite good enough for your because because if Scott Satterfield had done this for um the Florida job or or the Texas job or the Michigan job or something like I don't think Louisville fans would have been that pissed off but because it was the South Carolina job because it was a job that Louisville fans can with a good reason say really it's that is is it that much better than what you have here it's not is it Scott and he did it a little too publicly now just like all of that goodwill from that first really good year that post-batrino turnaround it's all he like pissed it all

the way so that he could what have have dinner with the fucking south carolina athletic director was like give us barabbas petrino but his dick's out we don't care fine we love it at least it doesn't talk to south carolina can you help me carry my wood when you get the chance i hear by bequeath the voice to ryan i am free of it genie i am free i no longer it's all ryan's now yeah wait wait wait jesus spencer became our ranking scott last weekend and now jason is bequeathing bobby point trino voice he's ready to complete some kind of gandolph transformation yeah i'm just shedding everything yeah i'm i just i can actually spencer took dusty roads for me on this episode i got out i mean we both we both do dusty roads is big enough

Dusty Rose is for the, I'm kidding, Dusty Rose is for the people. Oh shit, y'all, when does Gandalf come back? At the turn of the tide. At the turn of the tide, Danny. God, that movie would be so much better. I mean, it's perfect as is, but God, I would have been so happy

if it had been Dusty Rhodes riding over that hill. Shad of facts. I see below me, hills deep. Thoron! I've literally got the four horsemen with me Gimley stretch your hands across the sky I see that hand

I want you to reach out and touch that television screen in front of you inside a hym's deep up here on this hill that's the highest hill I've ever been on where I come from Austin, Texas we don't have hills like this one when you see that singlet

on the horizon that polka dot finglet on the horizon it's floating in the breeze daddy rickflare i see you alive with sorrow and a sour man gandolph gandolph the white are you back or is this just a dream it is a dream the american dream dusty gandolph the white not that kind of white just wearing white gandolph the dusty God. Gandoff of all ethnicities at once. My face hurts. Oh, God. I'm really excited for Server to get to this part in the show and just wet his pants.

I do have a health warning regarding a prescription. Besides what we just did? Yeah, yeah. We provide information about health and wellness to the people all the time. People always say that about the full cast. And I wanted to go ahead. And look at how great public health is going in 2020. Hey, we're in charge and the results speak for themselves.

I want to give you a warning about the prescription medication known as Bonix. Bonix do not take if your team is in a close game with Texas A&M. There may be feelings of euphoria, for instance, a spectacular touchdown run, where I think Bo Nix legit had two guys on his back at one point. trying to tackle him and somehow spun out of it, that will be accompanied with a bleeding of the eyes and the eventual loss to say a team like Texas A&M. I watched most of that A&M and Auburn game,

and I don't know what position Bo Nix plays. I know a position he does not play. Defensive tackle, linebacker, quarterback, any of the positions that could potentially tackle a Texas A&M. running back. He doesn't play any of those. And I don't think he's particularly well equipped just by looking at him. On the other hand, A&M ran for 313 yards on 47 carries. So it might have been worth the shot. Fuck it. I mean, they should have tried it, right? It would have been

funny. Well, I mean, it's not like Bo Nix hasn't had to make a tackle before. That's fair. That's fair. That happens to him. reasonably frequently, right? That I think we could say, oh, no, he has some experience with it, right? He knows how to pursue. He does know how to pursue. He's very strong. I did see that, because every time I'm willing to write off Bonnix completely as a quarterback,

he does something like carry two guys on his back while figuring out the play. Do you know what kind of strength you have to have to allow that kind of indecision without actually going down? There was a moment in that play where he's sitting there going, I wonder what I'm going to do is there's like three guys trying to pull him down and for a second he gets to go I think I'm just going to sit here and maybe

have a mint maybe just relax oh I should run for a touchdown and he does Auburn's so confusing y'all I would say Bonex feels like a real Tayson Hill type but Taysam Hills out here

throwing for you know sweeping the Falcons throwing for like 450 yards on the year or the falcons something like that so i got some things to say about drew breeze's ribs how many does he have he's got a lot of like because he is so short that his ribs are closer together and that is why he injured so many of them at once like they like broke one and that broke the next one and that broke the next one oh rimba sure he's put together like a marimba but also this man is just one big pile of tetris pieces waiting for the the tetris pieces and uh shot

bodily constructed vitamins so you got you got 24 ribs what is that true yeah yeah nope that's true you have yeah this was when when the rib news came out everyone googled it and what is and like everyone at once was like what the fuck I don't know I have wait yeah what are we all touching ourselves right now in the torso so you have you have you have 12 sets four or 24 total. Or two sets. Yeah.

He's thinking about it in chylosaurus skin. I am. I am. But yeah, you have 24 ribs. And he had 11 of them broken. But I have one less, right? No, you have one less. I think it's just, that's like Spencer's not that old. He's not Adam.

That was the joke I was trying to get to. Thank you. I just don't know what on earth you. you're doing playing with like two broken ribs much less 11 have y'all ever broken a rib yeah it hurts to breathe it sucks it's real bad got so many of them how would you even know there's probably one broken all the time i feel like you should rub vitamins on it but that's what he's gonna he's gonna say you'll be like yeah advocate just got me through this i just rubbed advocare just got these copper jammies that uh are basically like a hyperbaric chamber that you can wash on gentle just

Brett Farve driving up on his tractor in the middle of the night to the Breeze estate going, I got a copper fit for you, buddy. It's going to fix everything. Well, unfortunately, the Saints didn't need Tayson Hill today because, or didn't need Drew Breeze today because they had Tayson Hill throw 37 times, and it worked. I don't think Brett Farve's allowed to drive after dark or in her houses in the state of Louisiana. Not that Sean Payton's overly concerned about his own job security, but, you know, he's pretty much got to know that, like, beating the Falcons twice is half the job. yeah especially if you can do it while you know having tason hill just air the ball out all day long

that's just extra obnoxious he's a football genius god i'm so excited for the jaguars to pay tason hill a shitload of money they're totally gonna do that oh no it's coming and richard's gonna lose his mind and then you said you wanted to establish the run and then tason hill's gonna have like two good games and Jags fans are going to be like, fuck yeah. Do you ball? And he's going to be trashed forever. We're all Mormons now. Richard,

you said you wanted to establish the run. What's more established than a quarterback who's 37 years old coming out of college? That man has a pension. But still runs a four or five. That's right. God, the fittest dad. He is. How do you keep so in shape, Taston Hill?

I got a church workout group. We call it CrossFit. but you know it's cross fit i go out there and i throw 37 times in an NFL game keeps you pretty fit yeah you know i also did want to point out this that uh there was something that i didn't really i mean i knew that they were having that year but i didn't realize how big that year is um if if i was a new problem for you it i thank you that hurtful or untrue if i if i Iowa State wins their ninth game if they win the Big 12 championship. This is, of course, assuming that we get to play that game.

Iowa State will win nine games. Iowa State has only won nine games two times before in their entire history. Their entire century plus of playing football. And they, that would be the third time, period. So the last one, the year 2000, that year was. so spectacular they finished all of 25th I feel like if they pull it off this year they're going to finish a good bit higher than that the one before it was uh 1906 so they've never won six they've never won 10 games correct never won 10 games so in theory if they win if they win

the big 12 championship and they win let's say their bowl game let's say it don't make the playoff but they want they get a bowl game yeah they could they could literally do something no team no program has ever no school god damn it that they have never done in program history that's okay yeah no never and also in a season where they lost to louisiana that is correct by 17 not close they got there they got stomped by louisiana i know there were some special teams shit and whatever but you lost by 17 and who beat those cajans that's right Carolina. Coast of Carolina.

Transit W over Ohio State. I said Ohio State. Let's roll with that, too. Mm-hmm. Yep. Those insane, skull-wamping, strip mall arsonists, claddened peel, mullet-wearing. Is there a more beautiful phrase than strip-mow arsonists?

No, I submit not, especially when associated with the most beautiful team of 2020, Coastal Carolina. I do submit not. This man hates pay less shoes. This man will tackle anyone in this mall into this fountain of this empty mall that only has an orange Julius and a megachurch left in it. I'll fuck up a Carvel. Don't test me. You know, I kidnapped the sample lady at the mall only Chick-fil-A.

You know, I'm banned from Carolina pottery in every state except the Carolinas. That's not a joke. She's not joking about that. going back to Iowa State real quick Matt Campbell said the best four-year run in that program's history the best so Auburn job shit we're going way past Auburn

let's give this man the Patriots job as soon as fire Belichick and get this guy in here Bill might actually admit that if he did what at Iowa State I was like I mean you tell Bill like hey here's a weird job for you go replace Iowa

was state's greatest coach yeah okay i'll do that sounds pretty fascinating yeah that's good yeah we're on to tCU man he might love that shit nobody's gonna talk to him there that's true um we're everyone's like you know he comes in with a sweatshirt with the sleeves coming off and iowa state admins are like oh you go into a fancy dress party jason we got the little uh podcast business here i'm gonna sing the song what okay go ahead podcast business what's the business podcast business it's a business a fancy chicken yeah that's a shant to clear it it's got a gun does it acorns.com slash fullcast so you can be as as classy as coastal carolina itself you can hey hey how about this well there's that but what if we use acorns dot com slash fullcast to encourage

everyone to become coastal carolina boosters shant oh yeah bag chickens the uh the app itself is uh it's it's pretty close to teal i think this is teal teal and white it is in my phone at least so what this is it's the country's leading saving and investing app rounds up dollars from your purchases you can set an automated amount like a dollar a week or three dollars a week or whatever and it all goes in one pile and then magic investment stuff happens and your pile has grown. I have recently on this program commented on the fact that I had made nine cents and then 17 cents we're up to 43 cents in addition to the money that it's funneling away from a place where I can spend it. It's storing this money in a place that I cannot harm it and also has already added 43 cents and counting. The line is

going up so and if this national signing day if there's a little bit of a little bit of a confusion as to why coastal Carolina ranks so highly acorns.com slash full cast might be the reason why this is this is in line with coastal Carolina's history as well because joe molya who kind of like helped build that program not not at the very beginning but like was a big part of their start the starting road to prominence comes from a big finance background like yeah it was CEO of a major investment group and like i guess what i'm saying is acorns could you could have your not just support coastal carolina you could start your own you could go find some other school that doesn't even have football and you could say like south carolina absolutely wouldn't

Wouldn't that be crazy? We're going to start a football team at South Carolina. We're going to start landlocked Carolina University. That's Nebraska. That's Clemson. Oh, okay. So the prospects are good is what you're saying. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, if it's, if it's, so teal Nebraska, my God, that would have owned the 90s. Oh, dear God. Do they even, do Nebraska even see teal? Like, what do their eyes presented as? I think they're just now getting it. They still do the balloon thing at teal Nebraska, except you huff it. You huff all the haf all the havin.

Honestly, if the balloons end up in their pockets and not in the gullets of waterfowl, that's probably a better outcome. They're trying to kill the Chanticleer. It's a shitty habit, Nebraska. Quit it. Acorns.com slash fullcast, a claim of your $5 bonus.

Sorry for cussing in the ad read. There's an outstanding read, Jason. Spencer, it is time for you to play in my unnamed Broadway game. Oh, no, this is so good, by the way. because I completely forgot and am stunned, shocked, and surprised. Brian, at one point, you have to give him the same musicals two in a row and see if he can get it right twice.

I'll be so annoyed when he gets it right the second time. You won't. Okay, so Spencer, this week I'm going very easy. I am just doing adaptation. So these are other, in this case, they're all movies. Some of them were books as well that got turned into musicals. two of them are real two of them were really turned into musicals one was not so i'm just going to give you the title i assume you know if you if for some reason you haven't heard of any of these three

you can say so but i am confident you have okay okay so and i have to tell you okay all right so again two real one fake i'm just going to give them to you in alphabetical order american psycho basic instinct and carry i know carrie's real so that leaves basic instinct how do you know carry's real uh because i just remember in my head going okay there's a care like okay i don't think i'm responsible for this one it's ringing a bell well that happens in carry too i'm going to go with basic instinct being the fake one. God. How does this keep happening? Fuck me. Fuck. Yeah, that's the

lead song and the basic instinct musical. I hate you. That's another song. That's the end of that lot. You're just reeling off. That's the end of Act 1. That's the last song in Act 1. So let's talk about the American Psycho musical because it's a doozy.

that's a recent one too isn't it yeah close carry i thought carry was a little bit i thought carrie was like in the 80s or something i thought that oh did they revive it recently i think so i just i like that one i remember being real and then i feel like i saw that in l.a honestly i split the difference by going okay well which one would make a better musical sure and american psycho would obviously make the better musical oh thank god a disaffected man plotting to kill people and singing about No, I was just thinking that, like, you know... Oh, I'm yelling about American Psycho being a musical, not about you. Okay, but I was just thinking that, like, you know, you could do HIP to B Square, right?

So, could do that. You think Huey Lewis would license it? Yes, I do. I can tell you, the person who wrote the music and lyrics for American Psycho, Dunkin Cheek. No. Yep. Yep.

Ryan, why don't we, we should do name somebody who has not done music and lyrics. Who is, who, okay, yeah. Like pick a pop star. Yeah, because if you got me on that, if you've been like, hey, is Duncan Sheik written a musical? I'm 50-50. I'm just guessing. Right. Right.

Fair. God, that's amazing. Although if you said Bono on the edge, I'd feel like, no way. I'm starting to feel like Spencer likes musicals. Like for all his anti-Broadway, for all his anti-Broadway. bullshit? Certainly you think Spencer likes musicals because he's... No, Spencer saying he doesn't like musicals are just

his way of putting up a wall against him and other people who are performing emotions that he doesn't understand. No, no, no. People singing live in front of an audience and it's not like a concert setting, it's the cringiest thing for me.

I can't... Yeah, it's very uncomfortable. So like when somebody starts singing as part of the plot, I get profoundly uncomfortable unless it's Russell Crow and Liam Mizorab in which case I'm like at last the perfect voice

for the character all right well fuck off Julie Andrews you heard it here first this this is why he took such a violent stance against our boy Stanley Tucci that makes sense still unforgivable do you think we get Spencer to be in a musical

oh absolutely he has a real pirates of penzance vibe oh by which you mean he's Kevin Klein yeah that's real accurate that's real accurate so I'm gonna be over here talking about Indiana listen actually I think he wants to think I'm gonna say something even meaner I actually think he's more Kenneth Branagh wow like I said I'm just gonna be over here and my even know what I'm talking in my healing I'm gonna say something even meaner I'm actually think he's more Kenneth Branagh wow like I said I'm just gonna be over here and my even know what I'm talking about in my healing envelope of positivity and light. You don't even know what I'm talking. And being compared to Kenneth Brown, it's never a good thing. You don't know that. I'm pretty sure. It could be way worse.

Indiana had 217 yards of offense and still beat Wisconsin. Do you know why? Because I'll tell you why. It's because one of their play cards has the Olive Garden logo above the Ace Hardin. hardware logo that's why that kind of strength can't be you can't beat it i swear to god our particle board

this the combination of the two the second the second i saw roger sherman like screen cap that i was like in the this is absolutely indiana's year in the big 10 you're channeling ace hardware and olive Garden, Ace is the place for the healthy, helpful Italian family meal stat? Are you kidding me? You know what I thought when I saw the two of them together? To quote Tom Allen, that's a special team. That's a special team right there, the special bond. They love each other.

That sign suggests to me like, hey, I'm going to Google how to build my own olive garden in my backyard. Quarantine project Quarantine backyard Personal Olive Garden Like most people Okay I know that this has happened No we're doing this

What commercial structure do you build in your backyard for quarantine Okay well like Tyrese Tyrese actually That's not a store that's a person No but like Tyrese Built his own Benihana He has his own Benihana in his backyard Sure

Because he loves Benihana so much And apparently this is a thing with athletes Right Okay does he have his own Benihana Hana or does he have a Habachi station? He has a little Japanese looking. It looks like the Benihana restaurant with the blue roof.

Okay. Okay. And it's in his backyard. Okay. And it has the same doors and the same grill. He has a guy come in and somebody comes in and does like the little clack, clack, clack, clack, clack, haibachi, you know, egg balancing onion volcano bit for him and guests. You know the one who's actually lived in Asia? And this is

the best description you can muster. Yes. Well, it's not like he's a writer. It's not like I'm a writer. God. As his former editor, that's very true. So like I said, in this healing envelope of light and warmth that I'm existing in right now, I will tell you about the commercial structure I would put in my backyard. But I want to know, it's Tyrese, the commercial structure is Tyrese.

Who now that he has patched up his feud with Ben Diesel is welcome in our home again. Ryan, I want to hear yours first, though. Chili's, Chili's two. You specifically want the airport Chili's with the little promenade? Yes, I want. I want the experience of having... I want cheese fries, but I want a limited menu. I want to eat chilies, but I also want to worry about timeliness.

Actually, I like... You know what, Ryan? I like this because you're getting... You know, you're getting Southwestern Egg rolls, but you're also keeping yourself humble. That's right. I want a blue margarita that I have to chug because I'm late for my connection. Jason, what would you build?

Hang out, what are we talking about? Talk about Bama. we would put which commercial restaurant chains I just said which commercial structure it could be anything it could be yeah it could be a top golf

yeah like Ryan would put a Chili's 2 in his backyard oh okay so I had been playing among us because the musicals had had been happening I'll step aside from that no sorry are you the imposter

please refer to it by its canonical name amongst us no I'm not the imposter I've done all my electrical tasks Spencer have you told the show what happened the first time your youngest played amongst us I will I'm going to get Jason so I have to build a business in my backyard it's not a business it's more of a like a personal a personal version it's like a personal yeah it's just for okay well you're not worried about like keep making it run a profit as a person who was raised in a personal pan pizzas I'm going to have a personal pan pizza hut

does it have a buffet does it have a buffet does it happen yeah we're going to go with the old style shrine we're going to go to the shrine red glass cups we're going to have such a good pick

and then in five years you can turn it into like a chiropractor office or a funeral home or a gun shop I mean vapes anything

I'm going to turn it into a university that's how Joe Biden could heal this country you can't spell UT without Pizza Hut wait backwards

If Joe Biden announces he's moving all executive functions to a burnt-up pizza hut. I actually have a degree that was really hard to get. God, it would win this nation back. I think I would put... Did Holly go? No, of course not. No. Does it matter? No. Holly, what are you picking?

Oh, why do you think I asked this question? Laser tag. Good pick. Thank you. Moving on. Damn, that's strong. I know. And you would have seen it buried. Just like you bury all my hopes.

I think, didn't I make you dinner tonight? That's it? Anyway. I can get that at my chilies too. In my backyard. Also, no, you made me lunch. It was daytime. That's how I know.

I think I would. put oh god you know what I think I would put you went to last just to be a drama queen you didn't even have a good idea

no I think you know what I would put for nostalgia's sake I want to put a sunglass hut back there you don't even know what those are do I wear sunglasses no Jesus

I don't like you just want to walk past it what a trash pick yeah I want a Sam goody but I don't have any money you might as well just put a baby gap in there you idiot I could you know what that's a perfectly good pick too

no because then people are going to come to your house and be like why do you have a baby gap in your backyard you don't have a baby also you get a trail of moms and they're like oh he's bona fide yeah he's got a sunglass hut and

he's got a small desperate mall in his backyard speaking of small and desperate you should have picked blockbuster video but whatever hell will freeze over before i even see a cute ironic version of blockbuster video back in my world buster you can trash it that's the whole point what i have to do everything just keep going so mad i'm going to holly's laser tag fuck you yeah here's the joke holly's laser tag those aren't laser guns no they're not

that's fine they have lasers on them but that's not what they're for laisic tag that's fine I was really under... Welcome, all Cubscouts. I was really under-informed of how we scored points in this version of Laser Tag. Why did you have to present my health insurance card before? Oh, you'll see. Why did you call your laser tag company the most dangerous game? Because we hunt you for sport.

Why did you call it gun tag? Here. You're it. No, I would have knife tag. Speaking of guns, bang, bang, cowboys. Oh, what's in this edition of OAN news, TCU? Oklahoma State a wonderful win. A wonderful win over TCU this week.

Oh, and he losing. That's what I should have gone with. TCU did actually, according to the fake news, they beat Oake State, despite. having five turnovers five i'm sorry i said you were kevin kly with a thyroid problem it's a bit it's a bit late now i'll be a my kenneth brenta is naturally puffier so i feel like that's a okay fit by itself without adding hurtful modifiers i'm just going to be sitting here behind my cool sunglasses in my healing envelope of personal warmth and light you said that you should write a

song about it and talking about how tc u coughed at the all five times and still managed to win this game because something is seriously wrong with Oki State, something I'm sure the coach will remedy by spending the off-season hunting snakes and... Something to do with fluoridation. Mm-hmm. And reading and reading conspiracy theories. That's what's going to fix all this.

Listening to them. Yeah, he doesn't strike me as a reader. It's conspiracy theories on tape. This is the only reason he knows. knows how to pronounce son sue and they get you and mcgregor to do it he's really it's really soothing actually it is now he's still nude on the cover because that's just it's mandatory when you're dealing with you and mcgregor but yeah if the big 12 were any more random it'd be the pack 12 this year and the pack 12 would you like to talk about the pack 12 because i have a pack 12 thing

to talk about you know what you could talk about anything with the pack 12 because that's how random it is I would like to talk about Cal Oregon. They're playing right now. How's that going? That is correct. That is also a thing that is happening. Let's talk about the Cal Oregon game. At the start of the fourth quarter, Cal led 2117.

This was not a lead that felt particularly strong or likely to hold up because Oregon was driving. And at one point, they had third and one at the Cal 18. They got stuffed twice, turned the ball over on downs. Oregon then held Cal. to a three and out they got back to the cow 42 yard line and then they fumbled oregon held cow to another three and out then they went three and out themselves they had to punt it from their own three yard line cow got the ball at the oregon 42 uh at that point the bears uh they shortly faced a fourth and three from the oregon 35 they picked that one up

then they had a third and three where they ran for a loss of two yards now running them all made some sense because they were trying to just burn clock and make Oregon, make a decision about having the use a timeout. But that gave them fourth and five from the Oregon 25. Spencer, what did they do at that point if you know? On fourth and five from the Cal 25? From the Oregon 25. Sorry. So at that point, it's a what, 42, 43 yard field goal. Mm-hmm. Oh, no, they tried to go for it, didn't they? They did try to go for it. They went for it. They did not complete a pass. Oregon got the ball back with 154. go. They got to the Cal 38 with 52 seconds left. Holly, what did they do at that point?

What? You tweeted about it. Oh, is this the fumble? Is this the second fumble? This is the second fumble. Okay. This is a fumble, a forced fumble that was so beautiful that it looked like a fight sequence in a movie. It was, it was pretty magical. He spun dude into like a barrel roll correct so the 2117 we started the fourth quarter with that was the final Oregon in the last quarter alone had three possessions go into cal territory they came away with zero points thanks to two fumbles and a turnover on downs was it because cal was taking advantage of anything no cal's fourth quarter had two three amounts and a turnover on downs of their own and they still fucking won this was the most hilarious no you win no you win no you win no you and no you and no you and no you and no you and no

you win game I've seen in a long, long time. And that's how Cal, that's how A. Nobody wanted to own the libs. That's how Cal got their first win. There was also a point, that first, fourth down that Cal went for. That was like a fourth and three, I think, at the 35. You know, you know who was the color commentator on this call, Spencer.

That would be Rod Gilmore, who in the middle of this, in the middle of this, in the middle of this game, he became aware of the existence of alpacas. Yes. I'm not making... No, that's probably the best way to put what happened. Again, this is how Pac-12 the Pac-12 is this year. The Pac-12 has become even more random. Our boy, Rod Gilmore, just decided to just talk about alpacas, enthusiastically.

This was not a blowout, mind you. This was in the middle of a competitive game. That's correct. On the fourth and three from the 35, Rod was convinced the thing to do was kick the ball. Either punt it or field goal. He didn't care. He was eventually talked out of that. And at one point late in this game, Rod was going on about how getting this win was important for Cal, not just because, you know, it's a win in your division and it's over Oregon and blah, blah, blah, but because Cal needed this win so that they could start working their way towards bowl eligibility.

a thing that the NCAA just said wasn't a thing like seven weeks ago at this point like he was going on about how well if they win this then they win two more that's three and three and then you're bowl eligible and it's like rod that hasn't been a thing for since like early october also cal's not thinking about bowl eligibility and what are you talking about it was it was a really magical time i recommend it uh Not that highly, actually. Yeah, this was, of course, this was a pattern this weekend in terms of teams that had no wins or teams that had absolutely no hope coming in and just waxing people. What the fuck happened to Marshall? Listen, there is a whole, there is a trio. There's a trio of hilarious losses in the group of five that just each more chaotic than the next.

First, hopeless Eastern Michigan came into swagger and Western Michigan without a loss. And Eastern Michigan left with a win and Western Michigan left with their first loss against all odds. That was kind of wacky.

Not as wacky as this. Yeah, Marshall, averaging something like 37 points a game, decided to take a week off from all that scoring and lost 20 to nothing to food. You sound upset. Marshall, of course, a three touchdown favorite and lost by three touchdown. Pretty good.

Rice almost covered Marshall's spread. They just said, no, we got that. They got shut out. They got shut out by Rice. They got exercise and fresh air. This game was proof that home field magic is real and also very, very not real. But it's not the most painful. It's not the most painful of, like, these three games that I mentioned,

because the most painful of them is this. Akron hadn't won a game since 2018. And that straight came to an end against Bowling Green. Akron finally, somebody had to pick up that suspicious lunchbox. Somebody had to pick it up, and the team that chose to do that and pay the price was Bowling Green. What's in the matchbox? We don't know.

this game had massive ramifications in the battle to be the worst team of 2020 the worst team of the worst season ever the loser of this game was going to have a strong case bowling green might be the number one seed there subscribers to the moon crew newsletter you've seen the the full the full playoff picture laid out but UMass ULM FIU strong cases I haven't even mentioned oh and nine Kansas I don't even know if they make the top four That's how disgusting the bottom of the country is this year. But congratulations to Bowling Green for losing this game. A quarterback in this game went 9 of 17 for 87 yards and one touchdown. And he played for Akron. Quarterback run. Oh, God. Throw us the ball with some zip on it, though.

God, I hate you. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. See, y'all feel sorry for him sometimes. and then I'm trying to remember what I have to hang out with all the time That's fair I am going to I did kind of want to talk about Arkansas

Missou other than just to note that a 5048 game happened Like with an insane end game That I didn't know Mazoo have that many people who knew how to do that They listen Larry Roundtree had a great game Jefferson the freshman quarterback for Arkansas had to come in for Felipe Franks

had an amazing game he threw for three TDs kept a clean sheet it was just a spectacular game it was no coastal Carolina at BYU but it was close but I want to keep that discussion cursory in the name of time and just get to

what I think is the most important story of the week and the thing I want to leave our listeners with which is this Michigan is a 30 point underdog to all Ohio State.