Shutdown Fullcast - Fixing CFB '27: Kawaii Kirby Smart

Episode Date: July 15, 2026

This episode contains spoilers for the movie Signs (2002)Early CFB '27 thoughtsIf it's summer, you know we're getting cycling updates from Cap'n SurberThe Shutdown Fullcast is on Patreon. This is how we pay our producers, and occasionally ourselves. If you'd like to help with that, give us $4 a month (or a larger, funnier number of your choosing) and we'll give you bonus episodes. As of this recording we have delivered 29 (twenty-nine!!) bonus episodes since launching in August 2025. We think this is a pretty good deal (for you)Shutdown Fullcast is produced by Michael Ray Surber Fullcast theme variant arranged and performed by Nick KiviDID YOU KNOW: Spencer and Holly write Channel 6, a year-round newsletter that is mostly about football, until it’s notBefore the world ends (again), treat yourself to Jason’s critically praised novel and other workTravel in your mind palace to Phantom Island, Ryan’s other show with Steven Godfrey, which is not a college football show because another simply cannot existCheck out Surber’s band, Killer Antz (new album out now!)Purchase exclusive Shutdown Fullcast gear at preownedairboats.com, real website, not a trapThrough September 30, all proceeds from our PTKU merch collection will be donated to Alianza Translatinx

Please explain to me the logic of starting both World Cup games at 3 p.m. Yeah, I mean, like, this... Prime time. And people will actually watch it. This tournament going from, like, March Madness Hours for all the games to, like, March Madness Hours for the biggest games. It was pretty wild. I mean, I guess they do have to remind us.

They're like, mm-hmm, Europe. I mean, I mean, It's not like, that's the thing, though, like when the Olympics are over there, that shit starts at 2 a.m. here or whatever. You know what I mean? Yeah. Well, they don't cater to us either. Like, they're like, yeah, it's in Qatar. Deal with it.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. They don't cater to us. Yeah. But our, the shit starts at 3 p.m. on a Tuesday here for a gigantic game. Two of them. Two of them. I mean, one is at a more reasonable hour, I'm saying. Dude, today they're.

They're both at three. They're both at the same time. They don't start at the same time. Dude, look it up. Is it simultaneous simis? No, they're not in the same day. Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, you're right.

I thought, I thought one was tonight. But why are they both at three? Regardless. They're both at 3 p.m. Oh, my. That's nuts. It's 8 o'clock in London. Yeah, but fuck them.

They get the, but like, that's where. If the Olympics were in London, they would not be basing it on anywhere else. I wonder what the, like, someone who listens to this show who has one of those really cool monthly things that you pay for, you've got to have done the research. Like what's the ad dollars on like USA semifinal matches versus like for hydration break ad space versus like London like Sky Sports. I don't know who has it in the UK like TNT sports in the UK's. Like I'm just curious how much more they're making on the ad dollars in price.

prime time there, then Fox, who is not good at anything, is making, here, agreeing to have the games at 3 o'clock. Maybe another thing keep mind here is like, England, France, Spain, Argentina, they'd be watching this shit, even if you invented a time that does not exist. Yeah. So. It's like children awake at 3 a.m. for the England match who are like five years old. And then last summer break there, right?

is a year-round school thing. You could make up anything, I'd believe you. Yeah, I don't know. You could make up something. It seems like something that people come to America for summer vacation. Yeah, this is the season of Nuffly Biglitz. Nuffly Biglitz. Yeah.

We just seem like the society that would be like, it's fucking sucks. Everything is so terrible. They're like, so you just, the kids don't go to school all summer. That's right. That's right. We just don't. What do they do? Forget everything.

They forget everything. They learn how. to live on their own while we're at work. They live off the land. That's right. They develop skills. So surely society compensates and adjust for this and creates a space where these children can have learning experience.

No, no, we don't use it. Oh, incredible. So you're paid with time off work when your kids are off school? No. No. That's the trick. Nice try. Yeah, nice try. Comey.

Comey. Yeah. We don't want to do. just shit. That's been great. My kids have been home all summer and I'm like, what have they done? And I was like, they've watched me work. And occasionally, yell at them. You know, you're like,

learn boredom. Learn the power of boredom. And they have, friend. They have. Damn, right. The most valuable lesson of all. The most valuable lesson of all. Do not get bored. Don't ever get bored. Yeah, things, like, I don't know.

Things don't excite. maybe them as much as they did us just because like they've seen some pretty crazy shit like their entire lives we didn't see like a computer with color on the screen until we were teenagers yeah i mean i kind of wonder like what what constitutes uh what constitutes wonder for them some of it's universal you know i've taken them the places where they're like that was cool and like okay we agree right yeah but i've shown them things and gotten like utterly no sold you're like It's the board. It was way, I don't know.

It's easier to be bored now, I think. Easier and harder at the same time. Yeah, yeah, no, it's harder on you, but it's easier to become bored. You can just open, no, you can just open the, you can just open the distraction machine. The distraction machine is always there. YouTube Shorts is always there to melt your brain. Like 100%. I saw someone saying that you should just delete an app the minute that you find it too entertaining.

Hmm. The minute you spent more than three hours on it. and I was like Car center app. Server tell me about the guitar center app. Brother I'm asking.

I could see what they have in stock at any guitar center in the entire United States. Yeah. She just browsing coast to coast. Sometimes I'd just be like, what if I lived in Denver? Set location, like set the zip code Denver and the only show in stock.

What are they guys? What are they got at the Denver guitar center? If I wanted to take a trip. How far have you considered traveling for such a find? Definitely the Nashville one, because Nashville always has the best shit. Obviously, there are amazing used instrument stores in Nashville way better than Guitar Center. But the guitarists, like desperate people go to Guitar Center, too, to sell their cool shit. Yeah, every wannabe musician in Nashville, which is, as I understand, everyone in Nashville

unloading stuff they bought two days prior all the time. Yeah, yeah. that one's yeah that would be one um i will tell you the the app that eats the app that eats my time like nothing else is any lap where i can any app where i could just make a list and then see if i can optimize that list oh yeah yeah optimize in my way um so particularly if it's a game if it's a if like warhammer i'll just sit there and make lists oh okay theory crafting well that's why i had to quit marvel snap because marvel snap's just nothing but that like it eliminates everything else. It's like, make a list. Make a group. Play that group. Make a new list.

Adjust. A choir. Ooh, upgrade. I have no idea how you guys have lives and still play that. I played it for like 18 hours straight. And I was like, I need to get rid of this. Yeah, there are moments when you sort of realize, all right, all right. That's enough. That's enough. So when you look up. One value for me is the game crashes. So it sort of unplugs me on its own. It has that quality of life feature where it'll just fucking, like, it's like, okay, I'm two minutes in and it crashed. All right, I guess you're just, however long I would have played it, we're done with that for now. Is that like cocaine's feature where eventually it goes away and you have to go get more?

Or like cocaine crashing you, I guess. This is preferable to that. That's true. We limit the user's ability to do cocaine by limiting the user. Problem solved. Yeah. Well, it killed you, but at least you're not doing cocaine anymore. That's right.

Think of what death will do for your budget. Think of all the cocaine you didn't do. This is going back to a theme of the show, which is that death is an amazing financial move. Damn, yeah. Tax shelter, right? lowers your budget. Like, cost of living? Brother, cost of dines, nothing.

What cost of living? Cost of living? I mean, at that point, it's just like one-time storage fee. and you're good. This is where you put me. Talk about rent control. Yeah. I'll control your rent.

There, bang. Move me if you dare. Then you'll be haunted. Yeah, that's right. Really, we just invented haunting us like a countermeasure to being evicted from a graveyard. As soon as you remove me from my sarcophagus, you will regret it.

I assure you. That's right. That's right. No, you're a customer forever. That's right. You're locked in here. Capitalism following you from beyond the grave. I was going to ask, so this is,

there's this thing where Bryce Howard, who's an idiot, because he's a baseball player. Baseball players, by and large, you can show me here. So this is not Bryce down. I don't think that's his name. I'm sorry, Bryce Harper. Okay. Bryce.

Because I was like, oh, we're talking about Bryce Dallas Howard. No. Let's lock in. But some other Bryce. Okay. You have takes on the village. Let's hear them. Yeah.

I would love to have some. Severely underrated. I have a confession. I don't think I've seen a M.9-Sharmelon movie passed like the sixth sense. Just apply that to all of them. Like any other one, just sort of take that, okay, a ghost movie and apply it to any other type of movie. And you get the idea. We should all watch Dead Beach, though.

The beach that makes you old, I believe, is its full title. Science is incredible. I'm dying on this hill. Sorry. That's a good one. Science is very funny. I'll give it that. It's hilarious.

Is that the one with Mel Gibson? Yes, it is. He delivers the line, I am insane with anger. The very start of that scene is my favorite thing in the movie where he just goes, the police are here. I am with them. I am a police officer. I'm not doing it justice, but it's one of my favorite things to see on screen where a character is clearly psyching themselves up for something that they absolutely know they're going to look like a fuck-ass idiot doing and they do it anyway.

Jason Siegel getting ready to sing the Dracula musical song at the Tiki Bar with Milakunis and forgetting Sarah Marshall is another great example where you can see how exasperated a character is with themselves in the moment and they're trying to talk like a normal person. it's beautiful Mel Gibson is a monster asshole but also never got enough credit when we were still putting him in movies for being funny yeah

he's a very funny dude Spencer you know the thing about M-night is like the big twist right yeah do you know the twist in signs I do not don't well okay I don't care about spoilers I don't care about spoilers at all

so imagine you're in an alien species that is space faring colonialist, blah, blah, blah, and you've chosen Earth as your latest expansion point, right? Natural expansion.

Spencer is actually going to relate to the conclusion of this movie in two ways. We actually talked about this about 15 minutes ago. So when you look at the Earth, I don't know, what color is it? What's the main color that jumps out at you? Yeah, that's blue. It's big blue. Okay. So if you let's just say,

Spencer and you're in charge of a space Let's say you are the Spencerite Galactic Empire you are trillions of Spencers who are looking for a new planet, right? And you see a blue one and you know that water is blue and you don't like water.

Are you going to give it a shot anyway? No, I'm not. I'm going to keep it moving. You've just deleted all of signs because they're allergic to water. Here's my counterpoint. Here's my counterpoint. Nope, here we go.

You ready? Are you ready to be brought right back on board? Yeah, I can fix it. No, the aliens are ultimately defeated because one of the kids, one of Mel Gibson's kids, constantly leaves cups of water all over the house. So we're good. Yeah. This house.

Yeah. Welcome. Welcome. Thank you, son. I wish we had a capture of the face you just made. They made, you're trying to tell me. M. Knight-Sharmelon made an entire movie about being a dad of kids who leave water all over the house.

He's done that a couple times actually, and it slaps. I'm sorry. I will die on this hill. Actually, I won't. You will die on this hill if you choose to yell at me alone and boring. I don't care about your thoughts. You will die on this beach very rapidly. You will die on Old Beach.

That's the name of the movie. You will die on Old Beach of old age seven minutes from now. Yep. And he's made how many movies? He's made like nine movies like this, 10 movies, probably. Yeah. Throw out a number, I believe you. Yeah, I'm plot immune.

I know some people enjoy movies for plot. I don't care at all. You can tell me whatever. In fact, you should. You don't enjoy the fact that there's a character. Have you ever heard anything more relatable in your life than the entire plot of somebody's life hinging on the fact that your kids leave water all over the house? Well, yeah, but now I don't have to be impatient watching the movie.

I can just be like, oh, yeah. Oh, I have an update for you. My son. Oh, thank God. My younger son saw the movie that I have called tedious on this podcast. He saw Speed. He was shown the movie Speed, and he thinks Speed... Where?

He thinks Speed is the greatest movie ever made. He's correct, and I've always said that he's the smart one. Yes, he thinks Speed is an amazing film. Where did he see Speed? He was shown this by his uncle. I mean, it seems like it's always on. That makes a lot more sense. Yes.

They watched Speed, and he was like... Like, Dad, this film is amazing. And I said, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Always said he's the smart one. Yes. He did not say, Dad, I get itchy waiting because I could see what's going to happen and it bugs me. Or it seems tedious. I said they should just get off the bus and he's like, Dad, but they blow up.

They have things rigged. They'll be harmed. So when you tell people you love Seven Samurai, you're just like putting on, right? No? Why? Okay. Nothing. Why? I can't stand movies. I can't stand movies where one, there's a process that they have to unwind. And a lot of the, and like they do it really laboriously, which I think speed does. And two, two, I don't really like plot, so I don't want you to just lay it out for me.

You can spoil it all the first two minutes and I enjoy the movie a lot better. Three, three, I can't stand a movie where there is a malevolent villain who has one step ahead of you at all times. right oh i thought of that it's like a it's like arguing with a four-year-old you know like oh okay i'm gonna hide and go around the corner and they're like i've banned corner hiding talk about literally anything else yes but i thought you should know sometimes people wonder about why we don't talk about movies and shit more on channel six this is why so in seven samurai um it mean at first it's it's i'm just checking how it complies with all of your requirements first of all it tells you right away how many samurai there are that's right not wondering like

You're not like, damn, we're up to three, up to four, fuck, I forget this go. Nope, seven, right there. It's right there in the name. That's all I remember about that movie, so. Yep. That's a very important landmark cinema. Of course, I remember all of it. I don't remember anything else that happens in that.

Right at the start. Right at the start, it's like, how many are there? Seven. How many bad guys you got more than that? Okay, I'm clear on the math. Oh, okay. All right. But the bad guys are not constantly.

omniscient. Oh yeah. There's not a bad. There's just more of them. There's just more of them and they're not that right. So there's no riddler in the seven samurai. No, there's no riddler. There's no Joker, right? There's no

Dennis Hopper character. Surprise. Yeah, that's yeah. Boy, that's the real twist in seven samurai when Batman shows up. Curisov was a genius. That's probably why it's such an important

film. It's so important. It's just really important. It's, yeah, it's crucial because it's the first real one. So, I wanted to talk about Bryce Harper. Oh, thank God. So not Bryce Dallas Howard.

Mm-hmm. Not Bryce Dallas Howard. Because Bryce Harper, who I'm told is a baseball star, he made a 21-second video to a fan dual customer in November 2024, a customer who

named Terry Thompson, who's suing several sports books, because Terry Thompson lost $1.5 million gambling on Fanduil and other apps and said that he had his own VIP manager, and they would do little things to sort of keep him on them. It's not good when you have your own gambling manager. Right? So they had his own, he had his own gambling manager. and among other things and other little enticements to keep him gambling, right? Like, you know, free tickets, hotel rooms, Super Bowl access, etc. They think that Bryce to come on and be like, hey, man, it's Bryce Harper here.

Just thought, you know, it's been tough, man, but you've got to get back in the game. And which is, I don't have the words for that. Like, this is what happens when you get amoral nerds to kind of like, run things is that they don't understand that if you're going to do crime, you have to, you know, kind of keep it on the low. They're like, no, no, no, no, I have a great idea. We could do more crime and we can do it in an even like less tasteful way. So Harper makes this video and the Philadelphia Enquirer does a whole story on it. And then Bryce Harper's asked about it and he says he was fooled into it like that he was that he was, that he was as the athletic says,

hoodwinked into filming a personalized video message. That's fucking embarrassing to admit you're stupid. Are we still talking about Spencer's movie opinions? No, we're... Weirdly no. I never said my movie opinions were good. My mistake. Yeah.

Nor did you say you were hoodwinked into them. Yeah, that's... I was fooled. Kurosawa said there was going to be Batman in this movie. And there was not. Only Robin. Yeah. Harper says he has no affiliation with Fanduel and he just did it on Cameo.

So he got into it and he got, he got fooled because the request came from somebody only identified as Brittany. Aaron Rogers' wife tricked him into making a Fandual video. So kind of, but do you know how Brittany spelled here? Yes. B.R. Y T-T-A-N-N-I. Oh, me one of those. Oh, that's Diesel's sister.

Yeah. Old Diesel and Brittany Fielding, they're good people. But yeah, he even says, in the submission, he even says, like, to tell his son, hello from Fanduel. So Bryce Harper says that he did. not know. He said, I read the scripted good faith. Which goes back to my question, can you get someone to just read anything on Cameo?

Because we've only used Cameo for good. We got Dave Wanstead to do a sandwich, right? Review. Oh yeah, I saw there was a really good one, some comedian like he spent like a year getting what's the, Kenny G

to like tell somebody like their parents were breaking up, but they still loved them and it wasn't their fault but then they were getting but then he had them like also say that they were getting back together in another video and then another video that they were breaking up again and this time it was their fault he kept it up for like a year and a half until he finally said I wasn't doing this or I was doing I was making this up I'm sorry I've seen um people have Scott Steiner explain math problems there's a lot of that um

does he do it adequately does he do it adequately Does he do it well? It depends on what you mean by that. He definitely does it. Like, definitely does it. Like, he's definitely in on the joke that is Scott Steiner and kind of has been all along. But anyway, he'll, in any mathematical theorem you send him, he will invent a new one. This is amazing.

But, like, yeah, I don't know what's worse is admitting. you're dumb off of this or that you are worth what many people say conservatively is like a hundred million dollars and you're grinded on cameo like i know hustle never sleeps but that that's that's insomnia your hustle can sleep a little fun money beer money that's my guitar center money yes 100 percent i i just i just send that straight to my sweet water rip what i do is I get my cameo money and I funnel it directly to Scott Steiner. So that, you know, if you're Bryce Harper, you haven't been to math class many times since you were 18 years old.

You know what I mean? So you're going to need some help in that area. Scott can turn that into unlimited cash. I've heard him do it. First you've got to build a Shonies. And then after that, step three, millions. Eat the Shonies. Yeah.

Got you. That's my. If I had to, if you have to have one wrestler who is in charge of your finances. Like I just, tomorrow you got to sign it over to one wrestler. Who is it going to be? A million dollar man. No, not the million dollar man. No, no, no.

We have some evidence about that. You're going to fucking jail if you do that. I mean, the rocks bitch is hell. So. Like he'll just fuck up Moana again or whatever and I'll somehow accumulate some of that. He'll just put me in like Moana 5, right? Yeah. Boom.

I think it's going to be, I'm a stone cold. I trust him because he recently posted some video of like a used 87 Toyota truck he had, that he like totally redid and he was like, it's all original. And I don't know, just the, I think that's all he's really doing now, is selling beer and like redoing trucks to sell to use car dealerships. And I just trust that he's not going to fuck around with it. He ain't got time to mess me over. Yeah, he's busy hurting his ranch cats.

Well, he's just going to use it to buy trucks and turn around and I'll make $3,000 on him all day, you know. It sounds like there's a truck turning around outside. That's right. Yeah, they're cutting down some trees out there or something. I don't know. It's stone cold. He's like, listen, I'm backing up. He's here to drop off an 83 Honda for $1,100.

And he's got, listen, he's got a perfectly restored Ford F Series 84 coming for you, man. Oh, my. Yeah. It's got bench seats, no seatbelts. Sick. Only made 5,000 of these Dotsons. No seat. If your car was made before seatbelt laws, you're good.

Let them kids balk around in that back seat. It's okay, officer. This is a 72. Listen, you see that antique plate? It means I don't have to be sober driving this. Yeah, you're pounding cigarettes. Throwing down as long as the beverage itself. was also before 72.

You can consume it, right? Yeah. This is original... Ratching off lotto, tickets, you name it. This is original label Coors, brother. This wasn't even legal here. I had a man bring it to me on a truck all the way from Texarkana.

Spencer, what was that like? I'm pretty good. It was good living. It was clean living. What's the worst wrestler you could leave and charge your finances? I have one. Rick Flair. Rick Flair.

Rick Flair. No. Rick Flair. Rick Flair, you will die. He'll be fine. He is unkillable, but you are not. You will both be broke.

He will tear in my eye. He will like crawl forth from whatever gutter he drank himself into off of your money and you will remain in it. Yeah, this was

from everything I have heard, that is 100% the answer for this. I think the speed with which he would dispose of your money is what really sets him apart. It's like some others in that industry would be like, oh, yeah, we're going on an investment together, right? Flair is just like, money in my hand, wiping my ass with it. Woo!

So we go get David. Tell him he can have some. Dead broke, signed a deal with wrestle in Germany, got off the plane, was in the Frankfurt airport, blew it all buying drinks for people in the Frankfurt airport which means that there's just some German going around

who is like his name was Richard Flair he's the amazing guy bought his many beers loved him I think he died three times but he's fine now surely surely this man is dead now actually Reinhard he's right here wiping his ass with a hundred dollars

he is dead however he is also here yeah I was going to go back and the one I would actually entrust with my money. Now, I don't know if it would make money, but the money would still be there would be McFoly. Because McFoly was the guy who, to save money, would take off all of his clothes at the laundromat, except his underwear, and just wash them. They're putting it back on. And then he would put them back on. He was the guy who, when they had popcorn at the end of the night at the shows, would put it all on a garbage bag,

I just eat that for dinner. After he bled out on the floor for an hour, he would just rise and just eat the stuff beside him on the floor. Also, everything he's ever worn looked like he bought it in bulk in like 1989. And it's just working his way through it as it tatters.

Because he did. Just multiple characters where it's like, and it's not just one character where it's like sweatpants. Yeah, all of his characters are dirt bags. They're all sweatpants wears. It's cool. It's an amazing coincidence. I have to invent.

to the new character in which I dressed like a guy who has been wearing the same thing for 25 years. I got new balances and sweatpants. So tell me about this character. Yeah, he's, he's desperate looking. Okay, yeah, sure. Boss, I got this guy. He's slovenly. Okay, okay.

Yeah, and Croutle, eat it up. Yeah, Crowdly. This seems very close to your heart. Absolutely. Absolutely. So he's got like country slovenly, insane slovenly, and hippie slovenly. Yeah. And then you combine that.

That's why you had to do all the tricks, man. That's why he had to do all that shit. Well, what else have you got? He's like, I will lay face first on thumbtacks. Okay. Yeah. But I know that if I gave my money to make Foley, 1.3% yields in some saving of the account.

We're getting T-bills. We're Bogleheading the shit out of it. T-Bell does sound like a wrestling move. You got to win the T-Bell. There's no coming back from that. It's just steadily, steadily slowly. Ever so slowly working its way toward victory. It's the least exciting submission move.

Here we are in minute seven of the T-bill. Has it accrued enough yet? Is he ever going to reach the ropes? No, no, he's never going to reach the ropes. Oh, that's a good wrestling name. Your ass has ever to be locked in the compound interest. The accruer is such a good, like, 1994 WWF character. Like, yeah, my.

I hope your ass is ready to pay dividends. This is a credit check, buddy. You just got rejected. I'm cashing the checks your body wrote. Because they bounced, just like you. Will off this mat. Oh, God, he's got him in the Paul Volker. Okay.

Shut down. It's closer. Closer than you've been lately. It's summer. I got like congestion, you know. It's hot because, again, I'm the sad polar bear in the Memphis Zoo. Aged. That's right, sad old polar bear in the Memphis Zoo.

Oh, now I'm sad because I'm thinking about bears who actually deserve sympathy. That's right, unlike me, who should be damned for my bad movie opinions. Who's me? That's right. I'm Spencer Hall. I just met you were old. You're the one still talking about your bad movie opinions. Thank you. I'm joined as always by Jason Kirk, Holly Anderson, Michael's server on the ones and twos. That's wild. Spencer was around like before movies got good. I never really thought about that, you know? What do you mean? Well, like movies became good in like 1994. Before flight of the navigator. Yeah, like around that sort of window.

When did they make Smokey and the Bandit? That's the first good one. 1970. I want to say that's 78. 77. Yeah. The peak of cinema was 77. Wow.

Damn. Okay. Yeah. But yeah, I was around before movies got good. Before movies had CGI. Remember, movies aren't good until you get bad CGI. The Scorpion King, one of the first good movies. Okay.

Now you're back on God's path. Yeah, that's right. The giant, and again, launched financial consultant and tequila baron, Dwayne the Rock Johnson's career. Isn't that the, people always talk about like, wow, everyone in that movie's hot. And then you look and it's like PlayStation 2, Dwayne Johnson. Play C. Press C to engage Scorpion King. Quick time event, Dway Johnson.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Game Boy Advance, Dwayne Johnson. That movie is, that movie's incredible. I don't hear no slander to that or the extremely gummy claymation style CGI in that. I mean, it looks as cool as he does

in Moana redo. What do you even call this thing? It's just Moana all over. It's just a play, right? It's just a play. That's a good way of putting it. The dramatic production of Moana.

It is... No, no, no, not a dramatic... Like, they're playing. They're just playing. It's like kids play. Oh, okay. Yeah, no. It's like a high school.

Honestly, it's like, what are you doing for your high school theater project? And they're like, we're doing Moana. And you say, isn't that an animated movie? And you say, no, we have a wig. And it's like, yeah, yeah. And like, isn't a cartoon you were in? Yes. Yes.

But what if I wasn't? Oh, I'd like to spend $40 on two tickets to this, please. We can't. We can do the same actress to play Moana. So, like, I'm watching the filming of Moana the cartoon? No. No. There's just no drawings this time.

It is interesting how uniformly wretched all of these live-action remakes have been. Like, at this point, based on the amount of money they have to spend and on, like, just the law of averages, you would think that they would get a good one just by accident or in spite of themselves? Yeah. And they have not. I haven't seen any of the live action ones, and I don't know if I've ever heard anyone say this one is like especially great or worth making or, but like several of them made a lot of money. This one sure is. I got nieces and I can confirm they are all wretched. This has never worked.

This has never worked since they replaced the hot cartoon Fox Robin Hood with Kevin Costner on Dark Path ever since. Absolutely accurate. It is really a shame that they took that original story and like, just. slapped a person into it. Because historically speaking, is Fox, in my opinion. I don't know, like, we don't do this as anything else. You can't have a sporting event where you're like, hey, would you like to watch the Iron Bowl,

but everybody doesn't have pads or uniforms on? It's like, well, I mean, it's kind of a reverse, because, like, it's fun to watch the Nickelodeon version of the Cowboys Buccaneers game, you know, which is inherently going to be a funny game anyway. You know, like, it's fun. to watch the Simpsons computer fuck up that game, but

it's not so fun. It's like the opposite is true when it comes to Dwayne Johnson. Like, no, no, no. Give me the cartoon, please. The real is the funny one. It does suck when you're like, hey, the cartoon is far more charismatic or charming than you.

Like, in person. Who wants to see Dwayne the Rock Johnson sing? No one. No one wants to see that. we would like to see a cartoon the one time though on raw was it on raw

when it was like yeah it was like singing about how Seattle lost the sonics and everyone booed like the hardest any wrestling crowd has ever booed so like but I only want to see that sure I mean the Sacramento one's pretty good

is that the one I'm thinking of or like the Lakers series or something like that he's done a couple but like that's the one where he's singing in Sacramento and he's like the best thing that's going to happen to the rock tonight is when the rock leaves Sacramento tonight.

So if they did Moana, but it's just the rock shitting on local basketball fan bases. Yeah. It's like Maui, shouldn't you be focused on the whatever? And he's like, the Charlotte Hornet suck!

Okay, that might be a way to fix the series. I think we could do some historically accurate ones. You could do him shit talking a dead James Cook, right? Like, he's face down in the surf in Hawaii with his head caved in, and the rock is like, it doesn't matter what you say. Yeah. Can you smell? You don't have a nose.

Can you smell what the rock is cooking? It's you. It's you. Because the rock needs to cook, because the rock is alive. Also, you're currently in a cook pot. Yeah. Which is why they named a cat. I need a cat.

I need the calories. I need the calories. Cheat meal. My friend, usually I eat healthy, however. Today is your lucky day. Why wouldn't I? His flesh is firm and white, like a good God. I think it was, I think Perry Baker was playing for rugby sevens,

and they played all over Polynesia, and there was a mission. named Baker who was at one point eaten because he was a dick i don't think you got i don't think you got it eaten if you were nice right his missionary was was kind of a dick and um anyway perry baker i was like what was the best like sign you saw from fans ever right and perry baker was like oh easily easy it was when i think it was tonga he's like when i played tonga like they had a sign that said we ate the wrong baker got him should have eaten you yeah got him nailed Cooked.

It's like that's the greatest greatest sign I've ever seen. I ain't going to lie, I'm getting cooked. Literally. Yeah. Yeah. I don't. I have a question for you.

Jason. Me. Yeah, you have acquired the new college football game, which I'm not because it's... You're not even going to try it this time? It's too emotionally destabilizing for me. I can't handle it.

Wait, I thought the last one you just straight up hated for gameplay reasons. I did. I did. No, but, but, no, that is why I quit. I couldn't,

like, it just wouldn't work. It just didn't work the way a football game is supposed to work. At all. And I'm right. Yeah, we were all in a league that most of the league is still going and together. And we've lost some people along the way.

We lost Spencer along the way. But mid game Mid game against Chris Branch I threw my third pick And I was like nope I'm out Wait is that what happened This entire time

I thought you just didn't like The mechanics or something Is that why you quit? I mean technically I was not liking the mechanics I was like Call me when you've thrown your sixth pick Okay

We've had some We've had some Like that Michael Hennick just shaking his head at you From heaven In our dynasty We've had some real grandiose seven pick

type performances Which that's We were watching those on Twitter, like, this is fucking inspiring, man. This is... You know what? Never lost his confidence. Never lost his confidence.

Was it re-created the A&M South Carolina comeback? We had... So it was the greatest game in our dynasty was meet my A&M against David Ubbins, Arkansas. That's what it was. It was so wild that they had Jim... Ombaninini had Jim Mora on the podcast to talk about like, Oof, well, here's where you went wrong. Coach, can you critique?

Oh, yeah, I'll critique you. Hold on. The other thing that happened to Ubin along the way was he had never been the biggest fan of the recruiting. And, like, you know, can't blame him the recruiting can be very meticulous and not so much, like, deep or complex, but just button pushy, time consuming. So he had it set to automatic recruiting. And he'd go in and, like, tinker with it. Just say, like, all right, all right, team, make sure we get this guy, blah, blah, blah. and then sort of set it and forget it.

And the thing he didn't realize for years of this game was that the computer was then going behind him and erasing his moves. And it never tells you it's doing this. Yeah, yeah. You can just sort of like, you tell, you tell your recruiting staff, like, hey, we want to go all in on this quarterback, right? And then if you have it set to automatic recruiting,

it doesn't save that move. It says, but you are human and we are automatic. So we don't talk to that recruit anymore. So like his team was literally running out of guys. Like, there was a season where he had four defensive backs, and they were all seniors. And it's like, I think I'm going to throw on Arkansas this year. And eventually he realized it. And, like, because, like, the entire time we're like, how are we all recruiting all of us in the top 15?

And you're, like, 89th as an SEC team. And then eventually figured out. And, like, Zoom. So it was unreal. And it was kind of a good handicap because he's a really, really good, like, gamer, like, really good with the joysticks. You know, so, like, it worked out for me. because I got to beat him a few times. And honestly, that sort of leads me to the review of this year's game,

which is like, on the field, it's honestly, it's the best football game I've ever played. Like, at least until whatever patch. Does it work? It works great. I'm also worried they're going to patch it to fuck it up. We'll see. Oh, no, this game is hard. As of right now, the game is great.

Spencer, it's hard, but it's like fair. Like, if you're playing the computer, it's not. not a lot of like, oh, the computer just decided that their quarterback is perfect now. Like, DBs are smart. They're not, like, magically springing, teleporting toward the ball. They're like, if they're out of position, they're out of position. They're not standing around. They're looking for stuff to do, chasing work.

But, like, if your guy's open, he's open. There's no magic, ta-da interception that have played video games for the hundreds of years, which, you know, we'll see if that sticks. offensive line is also way, way, way smarter. They're a little bit overpowered. A few too many pancakes. My University of Alaska Sea Kings, listen, we coach those guys up,

but we don't coach them up that much. God damn. Just flattening folks. So, like, on the field, the gameplay is great. And, like, there's lots of little stuff where, like, your defense, you can, the pre-snap stuff where you used to be, you have to push 700,000 buttons.

You have to type out, like, all of King Lear in order to get your guys aligned how you want. Now it's like you have a preset, right? Like stop mobile quarterback, and they're like do-d-d-do-do-do-do. It does all that at once, which is great. Which is great, because in real life, in real life, that's done with, like, two words. Yeah, like defensive calls are two words in college. Yeah, it's like not in.

It's like Pat Helmet, and everybody knows what that means, you know what I mean? So all that stuff is great, the stuff that is, that's hope they improve it. Well, one is like the micro-transactions thing, which they... Which, okay, actual store... There's a big story here. Please explain this. Yeah. So there is, there's two things.

One is they added in some new, you can upgrade your coach stuff, some new traits if you like pre-order Madden, which Madden fucking sucks and buy like the more expensive version of the game or whatever. And you can like upgrade your dynasty coach with, I don't know, you have more NIL money. I don't even know what it is. I don't look at those features. The other, the one that really set off the whole thing was they took away the ability

to speed up your coach's XP progression. Like your coach can level up more quickly. So it's kind of an easy mode. And this isn't single player. So like you had to pay to speed up your coaches leveling up in single player, which is the equipment. Like a lot of people made the point. Like imagine like, you know, Final Fantasy having a feature where like,

okay, you can play on easy mode for more money. Like how insane does that sound, you know? Like, anyway. So like it became an instant thing people were yelling about. out and a bunch of YouTubers got on board and like it became a whole huge fucky a thing which is like pretty interesting because this type of shit has been in sports video games for a long time like NBA 2K is infested with this shit and Madden with Ultimate team is infested with it but like the college game because of its hiatus was like insulated from that for a while

like there's a little bit of stuff in NCAA 14 there was but like the hiatus meant that like college gamers were like building up like oh we're you know like there was like a little bit of like built-in solidarity because those lines weren't being crossed over the along the way so like when EA and to be clear referring to like EA's shadowy boss is not the dev team some of whom we're listening right now what's up y'all um it's you know it's it's not their fault at all it is the the various vampires in charge of whatever um who are pushing for this stuff and so like yeah it was a massive massive outrage and like kind of cool how hard of a red line it was you know

Like the number of times that we threw, I didn't in the course of any day, just sort of like fold on any number of outrages. There's a lot of them. Just being part of a society, right? But like this was one where a bunch of people just said, we've been geared up for a long time to say, fuck no to this. And they did. And yay folded, like, instantly.

To some extent, they still haven't put back the stuff. We'll see if the update includes everything they've said it's going to. But anyway, it was a pushback. against like an encroachment, the kind of which is pretty rare to see. And kind of inspiring, honestly. Bullying works. Like those YouTubers were all the, it was like the EA creators network. Like they were, they all extremely reliant on EA to like make their living what they've chosen to do.

So like I, that was, I too was like really inspired by the fact that so many of them were like, this is fucked. You guys are fucked. fuck y'all and we're not working with you again unless you do something and i think a couple of them are so like we're just never going to work with you again because this was shady um either yeah like it worked to a certain extent like that that shit's gone it's yeah like it's just not in the game anymore but like the also the thing that they said the issue also is to me was never like them putting this in the game i thought that was inevitable it was the fact that it was not advertised at all there was like no mention whatsoever of like we're going to take this thing away that is in the game and we're going to add the like a micro transaction is the thing that's replacing it. I think it's actually totally fine for these micro transactions to be in these games because

like they're all doing it. I think like stay on a high horse of like, you know, you shouldn't have that. Well, it's like the entire golf game is built about around like going to get a pair of shoes or a different golf club or like a polo that you essentially have to pay money for to get unless you grind. on the game for hours to get, you know, so they're all doing it. And the next one is probably going to be even worse than this. They're just going to be very like forthright about it.

They kind of pick their spots though, you know. I do think, like, I am not sure how the like moral logic breaks down, but like the conventions of it that most gamers are cool with is like you can make, I will pay money if I want my guy to have a different hat. That's fine. But I should not be allowed to pay money to have a. a better character than my neighbor who did not spend money. For whatever reason, that is something that everyone feels fine with.

Rocket Raccoon and Marvel Rivals has a wide array of hats, thanks to my wise investments, but he's not a better Rocket Raccoon than my neighbors. Thanks to the Rock Financial guidance. The Rock and Rocket Connection. Rock Financial. That's not Prudential, buddy. Strain Johnson. So, like, in the college game, like, because of this, I don't think it's going to be a kind of thing where EA can come along and say, like, okay, this year you got to pay for a better team.

It's going to be something where, like, you got to pay for a new set of custom stadiums. You got to pay, you know, like, you got to pay for, you actually get something. Like, they can't take away something and make you pay for it because of this response. Yeah, it would be cool if, like, they went the PC route of, like, okay, here's an expansion. pack where you can play with like you know i don't know no i got i got it i got it for you cc or something like that you know no you sell me the swag baby you sell me swac baby you sell me s w c 79 pay for like there's you know there there there there there there you can download any team you can create any team but if it's a thing where it's like you pay for all of fcs and a bunch of like

classic teams and like historical teams and like because that is something lots and lots of other sports games have but that's something this particular series does not have So it's adding something. It also felt normal for me for like these games to like do it this way too because the tradeoff is that games just get way more expensive. And like it has been as like everything gets more expensive in my life, a video game has costed $60 for pretty much as long as I can remember. I think Sega Genesis games were 50. But like the game prices are basically the same as they always have. And the way that that has happened is because so okay.

people that do want to spend like $300 on one game like here you can have every Batman skin in this Arkham but like you could also just have the Batman game for $60 that's still very good and fun. So that's what we do in college football 28 if EA comes along and says you can pay $5

for Batman skins I'll say that's fine that's how capitalism should work but don't make that Batman skin make my quarterback 99 overall I was going to say this is where you don't just dress like Batman like I think people get a

offended when you pay for you paid a circumvent skill right like in every single hobby there is some kind of cliche about the dentist who has too much money and bought X right cyclists talk about this right that there's a cyclist with like a yeah golfers right that there's like there's a dentist who spent 10 grand on his mountain bike and rides it once a month that's and he sucks and I'm and I'm tortuptom in my you know a little shitbox right whatever you're pushing right what's a shit bike server Probably the one I have. Like a diamond back or something. I don't know.

Like something's a academy. Right. Like I'm on my diamond back wasted a pro. Or the notion that like, you know, you pay like when I went to, it was very life affirming for me when I went to rally school. And one was actually pretty good at driving. And two, the guys who were there were all were mostly from a Ferrari club. And they all had Ferrari gear. And they showed up to the rally school like dipshits in Ferrari gear.

And they sucked. none of them could fucking drive. And that's the payoff, right? You can't level up in skill. You really can't. Like, you have to, we can't have that. That's, I think that's semantically offensive, right? Like, that's offensive at like a cellular level.

You can't pay it to get around that. Yeah. But if I could get Dabo shirtless for an extra $5, I will pay for that. If you are still listening. If you can tat up Dabo. Oh, fuck. If I could get full arm sleeves and like a chest piece, with like, you know, some biblical, like a Bible verse across the chest.

David beheading Goliath all across the back, something like that. Yeah, yeah. Crazy Thai. Oh, no, he likes the Fourth, the Second Corinthians 416 because of the LSU game. Just put that across the chest with like some, like, blood dripping, yeah, something fucking sick like that. Fucking POD quote on the rib cage. Oh, yeah. Crazy Thai prison tattoos.

We are the youth of the nation on the rib cage. Yeah. At 62 or how old it is. But, yeah, like, like evil dabbo. Give me like, like, if I can unlock the money that it's like, Dark Devo. Davo's attitude era, that's worth $5. I'll do it. Yeah.

Do you know how much I would pay for Umasume Kirby Smart? I would pay so much for that. Fuck, yeah. Anime horse curl Kirby Smart. Kawai. Kawai Kirby. U-woo Kirby Smart. Who-woo Kirby.

I would pay so much for U-U-Kermy. Foo Kirby. Do me a favor. Don't change the face. I know you might want to give him big eyes. No, make it the same grumpy potato. The same face,

the same bowl cut. Do give him the big eyes, I think. Yeah. Give him the big eyes? I think so. I think so, partly because, like,

I want that contrast. What at that point distinguishes him from a power puff girl? The visor. Okay. Thank you. Jowls.

I did ask. Yeah. And I don't want his voice to change I want the things he says to change, right? Oh, whoa, right? You know what I mean? Simpie.

Simpie. Yeah, I would pay, hold on, attention to EA. I would pay, I would pay $89 for that. Listen, to the people who make this game, many of whom are listening, forward this to your bosses. Yeah. Just telling this is what we'll pay for. With the subject line, anime horse girl Kirby Smart. Anime Horse Girl Kirby Smart.

Use your work email and their work email. Colon, how to pay off our Saudi debt. Smoke while you are doing so. That's right. Oh, I forgot they're working with Saudi debt. We've opened up an entirely new branch of problematic things. Yeah, like, it's kind of thing where you're like, I don't think the deal is official, but it's sort of like looming Saudi debt, you know?

So they're open up. to any and all financial streams, including those we have just devised. Oh, listen, this is, my brain is on fire right now. This is great. This is, we can do, we can do, God,

what's the Ryan Day version of this? Just get the nip rings out, just get the nips out. Yeah. Like some little chains on them, you know. This is Alt daddy, Alt daddy, Ryan Day. Yeah, somebody's into that, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Again, I would pay $17 for Alt Daddy Ryan Day. I would like to be able to toggle his beard color. Yeah, I mean, man, the options are endless. Let's do like old man Marcus Freeman, you know? Like he's back from the future. And like he's like grizzled.

Because like for years we've talked, my God, this guy's so young. Well, like, let's see time traveling a warrior. Marcus Freeman. Can we get them like managers going back to the wrestling thing? Okay. Yeah. Kirby smart. Like Paul Bear.

You can get it, yeah, you can get a little Tony Chavani or something. Like, which Coast, like, needs Paul Heyman the most

to speak for him, you know? Not Brent Key. Not Brent Key. He's pretty good on the mic. No, hell no. Man,

he could be a manager for, like, Christobal, he's like, he seems strained every time he has to speak to someone. That's a, yeah,

you're probably right. Yeah, you're probably right. He's very much the one, like, just get him to the ring. let somebody else handle all the blah blah. Is somebody currently working from an office in 1993?

It sounds like... Yeah, they're still doing tree stuff out there. Oh, okay. It sounds like a dot matrix printer. It does. It sounds like a dot matrix printer and a phone going off. See, I've been ignoring it because usually when I'm like, is the yard we're too loud, but apparently it's the beep in that really cuts through.

I don't hear it. Okay, good. My producer said he doesn't hear it, so we're fine. It's really bad. I'm very worried that I can't hear this. I mean, I barely hear. I was these expensive headphones, too. I've been playing a lot of gigs.

Listeners, sound off in the comments if you can hear it. They got me working artillery. That's his electromarmonics fault. The big muff. Tell what, he's not here. If you can hear it, reply to Ryan just to Ryan. Yeah, tell Ryan. You can hear it.

Ryan, I can hear it. Or if you can't, tell Ryan, you can't hear it. Yeah. Direct all complaints to Ryan. It's more he's a neutral arbor. I don't mean go bitch and Ryan. I just mean like this way we can, we can, it's a scientific test. But don't tell them what you mean by that.

Yeah, keep it. We got to keep it scientific. He's our control group. Totally neutral. It's what that means. Reminder, all we do is come up with fabulous business ideas because all we do is business. All we do is make money for the Saudis, but it's time to make money of our own. Speaking of impending Saudi dead,

pocket business, what's a business? Podcast business, out of business, haven't told the rest of the podcast that I sold us out to the Saudis, but we're all rich, but we might be in danger. That's where Ryan went. Yeah. Cool with it. Let's see here.

My, damn, every week I'm like, Hawaii would be the most logical team to talk about. We talked about the islands. We talked about Hawaii. We talked about my Alaska dynasty, who has an arch rivalry with Hawaii called the Volcano Cup. But instead, let's go to nearby Washington's. State. I'm going to look at the Washington State page at homefield apparel.com. And my good heavens, a cougars with a rose shirt, it's going to happen again. They will be back to the Rose Bowl. I believe it, win the day hat.

Yeah, strong as always, man. I really like this 88 Aloha Bowl shirt that I'm seeing for Washington State at homefield apparel.com. Vintage throwback. The animals are kicking ass, as always. A wide variety of cougars. We got pants. We got you name. man here at homefield apparel.com. These are throwback pants, no less. You don't see that every day. There's a, man. I know I say this every week,

but I mean it every week, because this is yet another stellar, stellar web page at homefield apparel.com where I advise everyone out there to pull up this webpage and just start spending money. Because the thing with, like, you spend money with electronic arts, and all you do is fight the tide of capitalism

and like barely keep the thing you already had, whereas you spend money with homefield apparel.com and you have something new, something you have never had before. That's true. This is among the many investments that we have touted on this show, homefield apparel.com is easily the home of the best one. And this might be what it takes to get McFoley to buy some new clothes.

Just one look at this place. Also, you can go to the PAC 12 page and try to learn all the schools that are in the PAC 12 this year. A thing I'm doing. Gonzaga, welcome. Texas State? Darn Tooting. Do we have gear for all these schools?

Absolutely. Is Colorado State in there? Hell yes, they are. Probably. Probably. They aren't. Can you get one of my favorite shirts, which is the Colorado State

vintage Colorado Agricultural Tea where it looks like a run? Oh, I have that one, and so does Ryan. The Heather Green sweatshirt. Yeah. Colorado State page at Homefieldapparel.com. You're getting busty ram. Yes. Oh my God. Look at the rack on that ram.

You're getting Bucksum ram. That's what we call Ryan when he's not here. That's right. Bucksum ram. Ryan, Annie, Bucksum Rami. Homefieldapparel.com. Homefieldapparel.com. Additionally, another investment that does not take anything away from you. How about that?

We'd be patreon.com slash shutdownfulcast, where we give you things that you did not have before, such as server talking for hours about Gilmore Girls. You have never heard that in your life unless you have heard it at our Patreon. And we also want to send out a feedback thing to y'all on stuff you might like to hear on our Patreon. And, yeah, either we will or won't have that to you at some point soon

for upcoming Patreon episodes. but you know the uh the dms shutdown forecast on our patreon page are open for stuff that our patrons might like to hear did i just say dm us on blue sky with patreon ideas no no i didn't did i say email us with patreon ideas i didn't but the dm's on patreon for patreon ideas open for business we would love to have your ideas on things that you would like us to do in exchange for your money at patreon.com things that we will not do on this feed an important lesson for anyone who runs a subscription service.

If you don't subscribe, we don't care. That's it. We want you to subscribe. That would be great. But if you don't subscribe, we're not going to answer. We don't care. We'll check. Next.

Hey, I turned 50. Whoa. And I wrote down everything that I know is absolutely true about life. It did not take long. It is not very long. But on Channel 6, you can read about all of it. You can be like, no, that's not true. Or, oh, you are so wise.

And that's, of course, what you're going to say when you read it, you know, because one of the pieces of advice, remember, you can't buy enough remotes. That's it. You can't buy enough remotes. Probably the smartest thing in there. Those little Roku remotes, they're too little. You're going to lose them. Your children, they're going to do worse. They're going to lose all of them.

So just keep buying them. It'll make your life easier. Much like a subscription to our Channel 6 newsletter will make it easier. Holly and I, two things a week for $10 a month in your inbox. Like clock work. Next. You know, also in your inbox is the until Saturday newsletter that I do at work, where when there's like, for instance,

it was mostly about the video game. Same as last week. I mostly wrote about the video game. So like when there's something that really requires someone in touch with their youth, let's put it that way, really explore the important story. Like if it involves something that like a 17 year old cares about, then like,

I'm all, I'll do the journalism. So anyway, a newsletter about college football that, uh, if it, that, if it's something that,

like, gamer level intelligence is very into, then I'm going to write about it. Um, until Saturday newsletter. It's free. It's free. It's great.

Which I say in the, what do you have to lose of terms? So how's the, how's the, um, having an album out life going. So good. Nothing's changed,

but it is nice that I don't, I'm not making it anymore. That's the best thing is I don't have to make it again. It's already made. But thank you for listening. If you have listened, we do have a killer ants is the we, the band that I'm in.

We have a show this Friday at the back table in Greensboro. It's free. It's all ages. It's us and Dai Sharique. Janus 414 was going to play. They unfortunately had to pull out because of some, stuff, but hopefully

we'll have a fill-in. If not, it'll just be us and Dai Shri and Dai Shri hadn't played in like a year. So there are good buds. We miss them. We're happy to play with them again. Additionally, you can list of hand in dirt. Hear me, Michael Felder and Stephen Hartzell talk shit.

And then Phantom Island is the podcast that Ryan does with Stephen Godfrey. And I help them with that every week. You go to Phantamiland.com. Show. You can sign up for a paid subscription. to get two full episodes every week. Sometimes more than that. But also, if you are not down with that subscription,

you can just listen to the free show every week on Wednesday. Those are always pretty good. We've got one coming up with Roger Sherman if you're listening to this now. So check that out. And that concludes podcast business. And I did sell us to the Saudis. I'll tell you guys about it, you know, in a month or two. once the check's clear.

I mean, the ones to me. Wow. I'm leaving the country. Yeah. All right. Yeah. Listen, they paid $123 million for it. Yeah.

You alone? Just you? I mean, did I say 123? Okay. Yeah. I wanted to ask a question to Michael Serber. About what I have here called the Tour to Ant. which is I have no idea what's happening in the Tour de France because my head has been 100% in the World Cup.

Sure. Yeah. What on earth is happening besides Bogart Sharke just dominating, I imagine? Yeah, that's the thing. It's over. He's going to win. But I think we kind of all probably thought that. Anybody who has been following the sport at all in the last couple years, especially because Jonas Vinkigo, who is his biggest challenger.

I say he's his biggest challenger because he has actually beaten Pogacha twice. And 2022, 2022, I believe for the years that that happened. Those two guys have only ever finished first and second place in the Tour de France. Pagacha, this will be his fifth Tour de France win. That equals Eddie Merrick. Bernardi, no, I think, also had five. Miguel and Duran had five. It makes him tied for the most all time.

no one has ever won more than five Tour de France. No one's ever done that. So next year would be kind of like the most historic run for him, but this is a pretty big deal because no one has won five since Miguel Enderrain did it, I believe, 1994, and Spencer, you may even know that, but I think it was like 94 or 95 that he won.

I was on his crew, yeah. Yeah, senior advisor at a time. Yeah, well, I know you and Miguel are tight. So, Vingigo. race the Giro this year the Giro de Talia which happened in May a month and a half out from that so he's got

a lot of race days in his legs a lot more than anyone else so there's a good chance that like maybe there's fatigue on his behalf did Pagotcha race the Giro nope no he did last year this is I think the important thing to note

about the quality the like difference in class between the two because I think falsely for whatever a reason because it drums up excitement that there is a rivalry. There are some who kind of see them as like equal match, like an equal match for one another.

The times that Pogacha has been beaten by Vigigo were times where he had an injury literally within two months run up to the race. So, I don't know, there's no fucking rivalry. Pogacca beats these, he beat him by like

six minutes last year, he'll be about like 10 minutes this year probably. Vigigo kind of cracked today though on a like more of a rolling mountain stage or a couple first category climbs which are the second biggest climbs in the tour And for the late person by the way For the lay person

By the way please explain cracked Yeah yeah He just kind of Okay so Vingigo on the final third category climb Running in Is able to shake Remcoe Evnipal who finished third in the tour two years ago

has won the Volta Espania. He's the Olympic road race champion. He's also kind of not the equal of Vingago or Pogacha, but is in the tier of like next best guys. He was currently fourth behind Isaac Deltoro, a young Mexican writer who almost won the Gero de Tadalia last year. So I guess it was year before last that Pogacha did the Gero Tour double. Anyway, I can't remember.

the, he like was able to shake Remko and is driving the group of like six outsiders who are all challenging for the podium of the mountain. Rimco kind of gets shaken off maybe like you would think he cracked. And I'll get, which is to say that like completely your legs give out. They stop kind of cooperating with what your brain wants to do. You would love to keep going as fast, but just the response isn't there. And a lot of times you'll see announcers called their peddling. squares. Like square wheels, right?

Yeah, yeah, they're just doing, they're going nowhere. Remko starts to struggle. Vingigo's like, fuck yeah, this is the guy that has challenged me before. He was only like, Del Toro had been dropped at this point already. Remko was like the next closest rider to Vingigo. He's like, cool, I can put some more time into him. Maybe I'll be able to shake some of these other guys and really secure my second place. and not hope for

Tade to crash but if you know something I'm in Sittade I'm in position A1 to take the yellow jersey Yeah So we're at that He goes way to

He went way too hard though Yeah And he crashed or bonked Or however you wanted to Cracked or Peddling squares Yeah peddling square He like all of a sudden

They've gone up the road To show the highlights of Pagacha Who's like a minute up the road At this point This is to add to his lead He's now got like a four minute lead In the tour total which is a big deal

we're only on stage 11 tomorrow he's like a minute up the road they've been following him the last we saw Remko was out the back losing maybe 10 seconds to this group of favorites including his one teammate who's been named co-leader with Florin Lipowitz who finished third in the tour last year

Remko's moved team to Red Bull to come over with him Lipowitz is kind of like the reason that Remko started to get distanced because he started pulling at the front. And then Rimco like started to dangle a little bit. And then Vingo's like, all right, fuck you. He goes full on.

Remko continues to dangle. Last we see, he's like off the back and no chance. Even the announcers are like, well, the co-leadership thing is being settled. Florin Lipowitz is going to be the leader of Red Bull. After we see Pogacha go over the finish line, next thing they cut back. And Rimcoe Evanapole is ripping around those guys. There was one thing that happened. when he was a junior writer, I think it was 19.

He had a mechanical on the bottom of a climb, and the favorites for the race attacked him when he had this mechanical. He got so fucking angry. He, like, at the end of the race as a junior, he was like, yeah, I just wanted to beat them by as much as possible, because I was pissed that they attacked me. I assume you don't mean physically, like, attacked him with. No, no, no.

They attacked him on the road as, as, to say like they went harder to try and put more time and take advantage of the fact that he had a misfortune. He ended up passing him and like winning that race by a minute and a half for two minutes. Something similar I think happened. He got pissed because his teammate kind of left him out to dry and kind of tried to settle this co-leadership thing in a spot where Rimco wasn't ready for it. And then Vingago tried to fucking bury him. So he just got really fucking mad and went out of his skin and dropped Vingago, put 12 seconds into him, plus got an extra six. seconds bonus time to cut his deficit to vingago down to like it was 48 seconds now it's like 30 seconds

it's the closest anyone's kind of been to vingago this deep into a tour whether he's been winning or in second place so meanwhile like everyone with it there's like five guys within 15 20 seconds of rimco so like the battle for the podium in the tour right now is essentially like the acc coastal on November 10th. There we go. And that's the prestigious is just be standing on the final podium in Paris. Like, Pogaccha's going to win this.

Really, like, what people don't realize is that if you win a stage, then that's like a career-making move, right? Yeah, it means you will always be able to be a professional cyclist. Like, as long as you want to do professional cycling, if you win a stage in the Tour de France, or really the Giorita Taua Vuelta Espana, you kind of like automatically have this,

leg up on anyone else that's trying to secure like a contract or a roster spot. It's not like the NFL guy who wins a Super Bowl and then Flames Out of the league in a year or two. It's like making the final four. Yeah, kind of. Yeah, because you don't win, but like, obviously only one of those teams wins, but all four of those teams like put a banner up in their arena and like they make t-shirts that they sell and show like that. But like today they were like, oh, Bogacha is an attack. He's become such an assassin that like he attacks from like 60K out that today there was like 20K to go.

And they're like, Bogacha's clearly not feeling well. And as soon as they say that, like he just immediately goes up the road. Yeah, I took that personally. Yeah, yeah. I took that personally and closed a 40 second gap in 10 seconds. Yeah. But that race is over. It's really, it's going to be a fun last like 10 stages though.

of seeing who, if someone can like knock Vingago from second spot, it would be a huge deal for Juan Iuso, Rimco Evanipole, Florin Lipowitz, Matish Shalmos, and then really, for the first time since Roman Bardé finished second in 2016, the French have a hope and Paul Sexass, who is 19 years old and his name is Sexass, and he's like within 30 seconds to the podium right now. He's going to win the Tour de France someday. Like he's finally going to end the drought that I think Bernardino won in 84 or 85 was his last. And that's the last time the Frenchman, right? Yeah.

And historically it's not like it was a ton of French that won it all the time. It was pretty well and evenly split up. Eddie Merrick won a bunch. Belgians won a bunch like Luxembourg, Charlie Gall one. The Italians won a bunch of door de France. even like, you know, there's the Lancash, which don't count. I'm sorry, a dude named Charlie Gall won the Tour de France and he's not French. Nope.

He's from Luxembourg. He was known as the, I want to make sure I, it's, I want to say, it's Charlie Gall, he was the angel of the, the, the angel of the mountains is what they called him. The angel of the mountains. The angel of the mountains. He won the Tour de France. 1958. He won the King of the Mountains in 55 and 56. I don't even want to win. I just want to be King of the Mountains.

What an incredible title. That should be a title given out in more sports, even ones that have nothing to do with mountains. Big 12 champion, the Angel of the Mountains. Oh, yeah. You get Pokedo-Dot uniforms if you win the Big 12. What? Oh, yeah. I'm sorry, that's the Monster Energy Big 12 football? Monster is that you're talking about?

Sorry, yes. It's prairie pox. the monster of the mountains then I do love the Alabama energy that Taday Pogacha has like the peak Nick Saban Alabama energy like the French are booing him as he goes up the road

like he said he couldn't hear his team radio over the sound of the booze he can say I'll hate him for like making the race uninteresting he just goes fucking harder but he's like he was like he was great I saw Lance Armstrong saying that he wanted Bogacha to beat

too to get six. He's like, yeah, yeah, I want him to beat that. I know people think that I don't. No, we don't. We don't. No one thinks that. No one really cares, Lance, what you think.

But I want him to win eight just so you have nothing. Nothing to threaten us with, ever. I mean, he wasn't Dodgeball. For a minute. He wasn't the angel of Dodgeball. Now, there's a fucking movie.