Shutdown Fullcast - Fullcast After Dark: Let's Kick a Field Goal To Keep It Close (At the Buzzer)

Episode Date: November 21, 2022

The Fullcast addresses Stanford kicking a field goal at the wire to only lose to Cal by three, Tennessee's debacle against South Carolina, a week of near-upsets that qualifies as college football edging, Arkansas pulling up to do some WOMPIN' in a freaky church van, Vandy keeping the universe in balance by beating lowly Florida, Michigan having a very normal and not dramatic day against Illinois, and Indiana winning a game while completing EXACTLY TWO PASSES.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Okay, you can do this. I know, I know. Carvana makes it so convenient to sell your car. It's just hard to let go. My car and I have been through so much together. But look, you already have a great offer from Carvana. That was fast. Well, I know my license played and VIN by heart, and those questions were easy. You're almost there.

Now to just accept the offer and schedule a pickup or drop off. How'd you do it? How were you so strong in letting go of your car? Well, I already made up my mind, and Carvana's so easy. Yeah, true. And sold. Go to Carvana.com to sell your car the convenient way. why is sonic drive-in

and like a topic how many people are really discussing this in terms of how many spaces is it like how many spaces have there been about the sonic drive-in? Is it about the disappearance of the sonic drive-in because I have some thoughts

we're in a sonic desert is it disappearing I think the only one left within us remote driving distance is like the fake Sonic on Southmoreland DJ Wally Sparks What is up?

Pride of Chattanooga The legend I am not muted I am good Good evening That's why he said We're not the same person Oh I thought I'm sorry

Hello Podcat I hope you're not too cold I saw LSU had clam chatter By request on the sidelines That's nice Hope you got some of that Nothing better than a delicious Tankered

of clam chowder. I love drinking cream-based soup during vigorous activity. That sounds like one of those things that people in the Tour de France used to do. Yeah, they take rat poison and arsenic, and then they would take some red wine, and then they drink a gigantic thing of chowder.

Wait, what was the arsenic for? Yeah, and then a Belgian man would knock him off the horse with a two-by-four. A horse in the Tour de France, you say. That's just how bad the cheating was. What's up, SEC Stack Cat? prescient prescient as always

in your predictions and your statistical analyses today I'm a stat cat I really love the pitch for that song what is the main idea of this song I am the scat I am the scat cat

The thesis is Mayamo scat cat Supporting evidence Bbop boob please cite your sources if the scatman can do it so can you i did tell one person that there's no after dark tonight but that's what you get for saying no forecast after dark tonight in the same tone of the people who read your top 25 list and they're like no school that clearly isn't on this list question mark question mark i'm sorry you only have ohio state at one i don't want to talk about oh boy i don't either we'll talk about maryland i think you know it's great

we don't have to hang on I have to find before we really get rolling I have to find the person who because I don't think it's somebody we've shouted out on the show before okay it was Jamie it was Jamie Pilot

Pilote at the pilot or Pilote however you're pronouncing this just watching Arkansas lose the Auburn job for two coaches in one season it's amazing man God that's beautiful Art and so we're so happy for you

That's so beautiful All right Let's light this candle Oh Welcome to the full cast after dark. Thank you for joining the internet's only late night recap show for the week that was in college football. I am Spencer Hall joining us, Jason Kirk, Holly Anderson, and a cavalcade of talented, beautiful listeners, including among others. I see Matt Scalici from

late of a.l.com I just say that because you to me, sir, you to me were one of the gateway drugs for a.l.com. I always appreciated that. Adam Kramer. He doesn't know where you work now. He has absolutely no idea. I'd have to look it up, but yes.

Podcat, who was freezing in the cold climes of Baton Rouge. And I just saw a gigantic pot of gumbo in my timeline. Thank you so much for That. Potcat.

Also joining us, the Big Sky Conference, a big day for the Big Sky. Our day got started with Game Day in, of all places, Bozeman, Montana, where my favorite moment was somebody rubbing Kirk Herb Street's feet because they were cold. Wait, that wasn't a joke. No, they were rubbing his feet. Oh, gross. They're freezing. A person was doing this?

A person. Yeah, I think that was a person rubbing his feet. Like a person had to do this. Yes, you know who wasn't? The strong-like bear Chris Felica. That's right. Who had a good coat and some gloves. That was enough to keep him warm.

Strong of heart. Strong of stat. Chris Felica. Was Kirk cold because he was cosplaying? Because I saw his outfit. Kirk had like the, well, Kirk had the Indiana Jones outfit. Or as West Blanketship called it, the Ohio Jones outfit going on. I like whoever, I'm sorry, I don't remember who this tweet was now,

but I saw it described as dressed like the kind of people Kevin Costner is trying to keep out of Yellowstone. Hey, that's a nice ranch you got there. Be a shame if somebody tried to steal it. Dun, Tom, Tom, Tom, Yellowstone, Season 9 and 8. I said this this morning on the Channel 6 space, but I really cannot encourage everybody enough to watch the first three episodes of Yellowstone

and then quit. The show with a body count that's akin to some actual wars. The body count goes way down after the first three episodes, which is why I'm telling you to quit after the first three episodes because the longer the show has gone on,

the more it seems that they have gotten the idea that they are prestige television. They're not. It is weekly ranch murder. And if they had kept it up like that way, and one of Kevin Costner's adult children had murdered someone every single week and he had to cover it up.

That's a program I would watch. But unfortunately, they chose a different direction. Yeah, that's the show where they have a cliff that they throw bodies off of, and it's introduced as a prominent plot point in, like, the first two episodes. Like, it's a spot that everybody knows about. Yeah, this is where we throw all the bad people.

Then nobody ever asks about it ever again. Pile of bodies at the bottom over trail. You know, who are the high-diddle, I can't do, Frankie Lane. trying to do high noon and I can't quite get there. My voice won't go deep enough. Jason, where would you want? Where would you want to start in terms of things I saw and things I beheld today? I think there's sort of an overall theme to the day. I mentioned a couple weeks ago in one group chat or another that this today had blood week potential, which is a rare thing

to see coming in advance. And then the scores. throughout the day bore out that potential, as always, if you have to ask, it is not yet. But we were very, very close to, like the entire top five, look like ass. Number five looked the most ass, but almost the entire, you know, playoff picture was in danger for large portions of the day. one thing I want to sort of one PSA for the readership is

we don't need every Saturday to be like almost a blood week you know that type of thing because that is every Saturday in college football it either is or it isn't and it wasn't but it almost was but it it just it was very nearly

an extremely special Saturday. And it ended up being pretty nice, entertaining. USC, UCLA was wonderful. South Carolina did things. No one would have ever imagined South Carolina doing against anyone. Yeah, special day, and it sets up a very entertaining close to the season. That's the overall gist of things, I think. But, no.

Spencer, are you still here? I am back in. I believe I am back in and good. Had to restart, had to restart the space, but I think I'm good. What we just had there was me filibustering while Spencer reconnected, I think. That was excellent. Yeah, that was excellent. Yeah, I didn't, this was one of those, I think we get these, the edging weekend.

The weekend of Edging. Yeah. That's what it was, yeah. That's definitely what it was. Where you just get a bunch of weird shit happens. USC UCLA was the grand explosion at the end. USC UCLA was like, that was fun. Let's never tell anyone we did any of this.

Fortunately, it's the Rose Bowl, so there aren't going to be that many witnesses. Are we put on our special uniforms we only wear once a year for each other? Hey, dude, have you ever had sex in public? Yeah, I did it at a UCLA home game. Yeah, nobody saw that. It's fine. That's not public.

Yeah. That's fun. I feel like there were a lot of... It's not public. It's just outdoors. I mean... There were a lot of really perverse things that happened today that didn't really add up to that much, but we're still very weird.

For instance, just pulling randomly, you know, a team that everyone loves and loves to watch every week. Iowa, Minnesota. Moe Ibrahim had 263 yards rushing and lost because it was 1310. and because we're playing Iowa football where the numbers don't matter and the scores are all made up.

Yeah, he had 263 yards and he lost. That sucks, man. Iowa, which won on a defensive score? Do I have that right? I mean, they always do. That's correct. Something like that.

They went on a field goal. Perfect. Jesus. That's what you want. Yeah, yeah. That wasn't the most exciting field goal of the day for me. Because the thing that I wanted to talk about...

It's either that or the other one. It's really close. It's really close. It's a tough call. No, no, no. I want to talk about the deep fuckery that was TCU Baylor. That was... Oh, man.

The most TCU shit of this season, which is saying a lot. In an extremely TCU full slate of events. TCU week in and week out, lets their opponent get all their shit in before TCU just activates comeback mode the cardiac frogs no that's terrible but um yeah this was the pinnacle of tCU behavior for the season um the most bullshit team of the year said with all affection and they trotted out their bullshittiest we love it folks and i'm not sure they'll be topping it um and i don't think that that'll uh be any sort of a letdown for them a fire

drill field goal to put away their arch rival. Did you see Sunny after? Yeah. After they scampered onto the field and kicked through the field goal and Sonny Dykes has approached, coach did that feel frantic? Nah. Somebody said, that was a breakfast taco ass answer. So just to give you the sequence, if you didn't see it,

I will take it back. It is 1.34 on the clock in the fourth quarter. And due to some extreme stupidity, a missed extra point that was a doink. Not just a, oh, he missed it. No, I mean, the kind of kick that feels like an indictment of everything the kicker's ever done in his life. Like, don't. off and we get chasing points and some weird scoring and we get to Baylor 28 TCU 26 with one minute and 34 seconds left on the clock. It's a process type situation where it feels like

the fine analytical mind of Dave Aranda who I, Holly, I want to discuss that thing we talked about with Dave right after this, so don't let me forget it. One thing. How Dave is going to get over this loss. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. So minute 34 left on the clock.

Undefeated TCU is facing their first loss of the season. And Max Duggan takes off like he's not the most inspiring scrambler in the world. He scrambles like somebody who knows how dangerous it is. That's the best part, like the best way I can describe it. Like scooting, Jason, I think is the word for it. If we say, who scooting. he's definitely doing some scooting let's say he's uh he's duggin he's that's correct he is dugging down the field they get to uh the clock is winding they get to um first and ten at the bailer

29 after a first down stops the clock and tc u coached by pass happy sunny dykes who i once watched coach an entire season at cow without calling a run don't look that up it's statistically sound he runs they run for three yards to the 26 yeah and then they uh they they run and the clock is going and it's still going and um and on third and seven they run again and that's where you have 17 seconds now bugger macfarlane said a team needs 16 seconds that says 17 seconds on the clock i will tell you listeners it did not feel like 16 seconds Not at fucking all. It felt like they actually started to get the field goal unit with 12 out there, at least.

There was like three or four seconds of, is that what Sonny's going to do? Shit! And everyone starts immediately trying to run out. They get out there. The holder nearly wipes out the kicker on the way to the setup. He does the like, I don't know if you've ever seen like Earl Hebner slide in on his belly to make a tap, right? To do a count in a professional wrestling match where he slides like 10 feet into the ring. That's what it looked like, right?

That's how the holder came in. He takes the snap, and Sonny Dykes made the nigh unpardonable sin of settling for a 40-yard field goal with a college kicker with an undefeated season on the line and no timeouts. And realistically, about 12 seconds to get it off, and they did it. This is the stupidest team. I love them so much. This is the dumbest shit. I hope they keep doing it the whole time. all of the chaos emeralds forfeited by less miles at lSU have been found and taken to fort worth

texas you know now you know this was a makeup call too on their part i mean a makeup call by the coaches for punting from what the 37 yeah this was the most remember we said aloud we're like what is sunny doing and then i think that he was putting i think that he was holding a he was holding a chaos emerald in reserve because he's like they'll give me an extra chaos emerald just for doing like the most iowa thing yeah so he kind of he dug himself a little hole that he could put the explosive in so that he wouldn't blow his fingers off at the end of the game there i call that foresight yeah he punted at one point from let's see the i say it was the 37 it might have been worse is the baler 40 they at one point punted from the baler 49 no this

the one we're talking about it was worse no he punted at the baler third from the baler 37 and it was downed at the baler 13 that one he was doing some david shaw type shit no by the way hey all was revealed because what type of shit did david shaw's team do this stand for a kick to field goal to make it 2720 at the end of the game ding wait wait what do you mean when you say to make it 2720 Yeah, it was 20. Which end of that score was Stanford? Stanford was 20. There we go.

Stanford kicked a field goal, you know, to keep it close. Yeah, I love the admission that, well, we could go for a, you know, a Hail Mary type thing, make the score look pretty nice. But come on, man, we're Stanford. Touchdown's not in the cards. Field goal is possible. It did make the game hit the over. If you bet a Stanford cow over, you're a fucking pervert. What's wrong with you?

That's true. I am a degenerate. We actually don't want to hear if you got beat on this one because we don't want to hear about what you've been doing the rest of your day. You fucking sicko. David, David, I mean, David Shaw had to know that was funny, right? Like, he had to know. David Shaw, funny? No, no, no, no.

This is, okay, are you familiar with the term icebox laugh? No. I don't think so. This is an old comedian thing. Steve Martin has a great, has a great little scene about this in one of his plays that I will not bore you with here. But it's something that doesn't seem funny at the time. But at home, when you get at home and it's midnight and you're like rummaging through the fridge for something to eat and you're standing there in just the dark and the light of the fridge door and you think about it again and you're like, that is an icebox laugh? So is it akin to like, this sounds like a deathbed laugh where you're like,

I didn't pay the gas bills this month. Yes, that's exactly the same thing. Thank you. Yeah, is that, okay. That's where we put dead people who's in the icebox. Yeah. I think my thing is imagining what David Shaw thinks is funny. Like, what is mirthful to David Shaw?

Has the man ever laughed in his life? He's like, uh-huh, compound interest. Chortling Chortling It's free real estate Heart-de-chuckle I just realize I have no idea what David Shaw sounds like

I just assume that he sounds like Sam the Eagle from the Muppets He is as a football coach doing an interview in any capacity the least interesting man on earth That is it It's very chill to listen to It's very chill

it is it is basically like one of those podcasts that helps you sleep by just saying soothing easy things maybe that's a career move for him uh update by the way and i want of some import um at least to those of us who absolutely love utah's bare knuckle style of football i heard kyle wittingham on game day saying things like hey this game's going to be a street fight boys and you know what if I got to get in a street fight and my money's on you every time guys. Well, the street fight is happening and... Kyle winning here is so at odds

with what I think of as Utah culture. Yeah, well... Because like, a street fight of Utah, like, what, outside the malt shop? But Kyle Wooding's M.S. says street fight and I'm like, oh, you're hitting someone with a plate from the gym. Yeah, yeah. You're beating someone up outside a frozen yogurt place.

Unfortunately, he's in a street fight with Bo Knicks. Wait, which Bo Nix? Which Bo Nix we got? We got, we got, we got, what flavor we got tonight. Bo is 16 for 21 tonight. Yeah. You, this is, you're in West Coast Bo Nix. This is the harmonically balanced Bo Nix, who is currently kicking some ass.

You can't say that kind of shit today. Yeah. Don't you put that devil on Bo? Yeah, Bo Nix currently beating some ass and reestablishing Oregon's, Oregon's backbone that Utah has ripped out in two games prior to this terrible fashion. They're leading Utah 173. You get your pride back, boys. Looks like we're closing in on an Oregon USC Pact 12 title game, I believe. Yeah. Assuming Utah doesn't pour it on in the second half, which is always possible.

Still Oregon's defense we're referring to here. Entirely possible. I wanted to talk about another shootout, that would be Georgia, Kentucky. Mm-hmm. Uh-huh. Just like we drew it up. The game where Georgia scored 16 points and somehow had the best showing of any top five team on the day. That's the state of things. Also, despite that, Fox is still, and I don't think this is because of that, I'm pretty sure that they had made this way to a bit advance, but Fox during the USC UCLA game is,

still running a Heisman graphic that does not have Stetsam-Binnett and in it. Why are we pretending like we don't know how this is going to end? Denial is a powerful thing. We're still doing it. At this point, I acknowledge Caleb Williams might win. That'd be amazing. Sure, yeah. I mean, it's deserved it.

Granted, it's fair and all. Yeah. But, uh... Caleb Williams himself, though, had the best rebuttal to this because the, um, They immediately asked him after the game, you know, what do you have to say to those Heisman voters? And he was like, oh, I don't care about all that. And then just like, I'm not paraphrasing. I'm not paraphrasing.

I'm pretty sure that's a direct quote. He said, I don't care about all that. And went on to talk about how great it was to win this with his team. That's lovely. That's the kind of thing highs and voters like to hear. Isn't it Spencer? Ironically, yes, it is. But I'm like, I appreciate, I choose to believe that he was speaking out against the silliness of the graphic.

genuine Heisman apathy Yeah We should just give it to Stetson Just gonna go ahead and say that You should just give it to I mean it Just will and should are two very different things I think it's acceptance is an important

It's a powerful thing I mean look at We've all learned in the past couple years What happens when you don't have regular mail service I would I would point out that Stetson Bennett provides essential goods and services he's now he's no longer the mailman uh due to a georgia dairy council endorsement he has decided to uh use the mailman nickname to become the postman

oh changing his pronouns huh you know there's going to be a lot of georgia fans who are suddenly in favor of mail-in ballots also in favor of defining man tisk so stats and bennett and the georgia bulldogs against Kentucky, the over-under for this game was 47 and a half points. Ambitious. Then what? They mustered 22 points combined in a 16-6 nail-biter. On a day when I think it was four Big Ten games had no one crossed 20 points, and apparently that's the first time in Big Ten history that's happened.

It's special shit when the Big Ten is out Big Tening everyone. Well, not to be overlooked, as the Georgia Bulls, the most big ten team in the country apparently i thought it was showy of georgia to try and steal thunder from another league they should be happy with their position uh in the conference that they hold it was it's a it's a quiet stately reserved thunder it's it's uh it's reverse diva behavior is what it is and i don't feel like we should encourage it did um Legendarily showboating me first, George and Fulton. Did anything happen in this game?

Absolutely not. Stets and Bennett overthrew Darnell, Washington, something that I didn't think was actually possible. Will got hurt again and came back again. I don't actually know what his legs are made of at this point. Will Levis did the most Will Levis thing, which was he dropped back through an absolute laser, like a bullet.

into coverage and Gary Danielson began to rhapsodize about how magnificent he was and then he threw I believe a pick while Gary was still talking about the previous pass yeah yeah and that's why he's a first that's not a good decision well yeah it was he was trying to hit the gap between the corner and the safety and a cover two and he missed it by about three yards so full will love us experience love that dude I think there's a more exciting game in the SEC um one that we should probably turn to next because folks we are joined by a very special guest in the twitter space the arkansas razorbacks are here oh you tune you listen you tune in oh i woke up the dog you tune in to hear about some wamping and let me tell you they know what

they're here for that yeah no you that's what i'm going to give you what you want you come in you come in for the wampin we're going to give you some wamping we're going to give you some wamp like I said sometimes the scoreboard ain't show it but we're going to give you some wamping and then on nights like this against the old miss rebels sometimes the scoreboard's going to hell show it sometimes the scoreboard's going to ooze it I'll go back to the big city of oxford and think on your sins mm-hmm that's what you know this is think on your sins Saturday Big Sam gets all the kids in the freaky church van he says we're going to go to Costco the freaky church van yeah you know when i say the freaky church fan by the way i mean the one that has the

is the van okay is freaky modifying church or van yeah same question it's the van so this church has multiple vans one of them's freaky yeah it's the super the super like haunted or freaky like sexual yeah same question for me well i wasn't going to say either but haunted appeals to me so i'm going to go ahead and say that Van Sex Ghosts. Haunted Arkansas van. It has the extended seats, right? Like it's the van that has the extra seats.

It's like for the ghosts. It's not a sex van without them. For the sex ghosts? It's for the ghosts, yes. And we're taking all the ghosts. Jared Jones is somewhere like, go on. Yeah, we're going to go down to Sam's Club. We're going to get the extra huge economy size palette of wampen.

Spencer, why do they call it Sam's Club? They call it Sam's Club. because that's Sam Walton's club. No, God, damn, dude. No, because it's Sam Adams, the great patron. No, no, it's Sam, um, because it belongs to Sam Pittman. That's why. That's what Ole Miss, Ole Miss is Sam's Club now.

That's right. You need a card to get old make. You want your dignity back. That's aisle seven, but I need to see a membership card first. Seriously, uh, Razorbacks before you get. afraid for your job and log out here i have one request please for the entire rest of the season and i'm aware that the regular season ends next week please for the entire rest of the season post those thirst trap video do do a bunch of those thirst trap videos like they do of lane but do it with

sam pitman give this big man some love let him let him be uh let him be a fashion icon uh also by the way i don't know arkansas is listening to this and you know you can't do this i'm pretty sure there's no way, no direct way to do this. Can you make sure somebody writes a very large check to Rock at Sanders? What I would like you to do as a football program is to go up to one of your big old Yehus, and by that I mean Jerry Jones, and be like, Jerry, cut the chick. And he'll be like, whewoo!

And he'll just write like a... If we had the means, we would do it ourselves at this point. So, tonight. So, Jerry, you tell them all about the sex bus, and then one thing leads to another, and the student athletes are properly compensated. There's like, these ghosts, are they shapely? Oh, the shapely is, sir. Yes, are these buxom ghosts?

The, I slid into Mac Brown there for a second, and we will slide into Mac Brown later. Speaking about sliding into, okay, thank you. Georgia Tech, then. Yes. It's a little bit of bad. Georgia Tech PDNC. What a night. I'm exhausted.

I'm emotionally exhausted. Man. in the in the like uh in a season with numerous interim coaches um achieving great things uh georgatex brant key is out here what what uh defeated two ranked teams including a uh a team that uh are they are have they clinch that terrible division who knows it doesn't really matter but uh georgatech just fucking everything up yeah that's great that's absolutely that's absolutely magnificent it beats you have you have multiple actual georgia tech fans in your immediate family do you not yeah i do i was uh i was raised one yeah

how was how was how was this evening in the in the kirk household uh i would i would assume it was enjoyed um no one in my house um participates but uh i assume in other kirk households it was greatly enjoyed uh this this team is now five and six overall and it could finish it looks like second in the division yeah just like we year it up

tremendous and if they and hey if they win if they win next week they're going to be bowl eligible Jason who did they play next week probably no one all that important I would guess

you know usually you want to you want to go home with a go home with something palatable on the schedule I mean they play They play Georgia. Is that bad? Lock in those bowl.

They only scored 16 points today. Lock in those bowl bets, those risk-free bets today for the Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets. Draft Kings. Ad, draft kings. Spawn. Hashtag Spawn.

Hashtag Spawn. Yeah, Drake May, they made Drake May look pedestrian. Drake May, like, was 16 for 30, 202, no T-Ds, and an intercept. This is a dude who was mentioned for some of those shiny awards and the lowly Georgia Tech yellow jackets beating ass under interim coach Brent Key just made him look like it made him look like Anthony Richardson without the wheels man. This is not good. Damn. Yeah. Do you think lane pulling a Matt Brown on Nick Saban in their recent meeting destabilized the crystalline structure of actual Mac Brown? Yeah, I think we're dealing with her rapidly.

I think we're dealing with rapidly. If you're a geologist, sound off in the comments. Are we describing Mac Brown at Mac Brown as something like a disintegrating space station at UNC, just slowly reentering the atmosphere? Well, he sure is full of hot air. Oh! I'm thinking a little. lot about killing myself um yeah yeah so good we don't have to think about unc i only say that because

they they don't belong in a playoff discussion and no error of scheduling or uh math is going to make that real for me so good thank you georgia tech you saved us all some trouble appreciate you and that's our show further trouble was saved the uh the the the states of carolina elsewhere did a there is a scenario that we have discussed for several weeks in which a team could have stumbled and fumbled its way into the playoff without winning its division the most threatening of those scenarios is now off the table because south carolina has defeated tennessee which the main things to know from this game is spencer rattler is suddenly the best football player in the world and tennessee's orange helmets um I fucking told y'all. Pretty bad. I fucking told y'all. I said it.

They're probably not going to wear those again. That's the good thing. That's the good news. We're never going to see those fucking helmets again. They're really ugly. Not as ugly as what they did while wearing them. Yeah. Seems those things went hand in hand.

All right. No, Spencer clear out. Just let me have it. Yeah, go ahead. Oh, I'm in like just, you know, empty the barrels. I know you don't want me to talk I'm just going to cuss This is no

It's just that Every now and then You decide to wake up And have a day And the universe is like No, that's not happening That's what happened to Tennessee All the bad things happen

You cannot convince me that this is a normal game Because Spencer Rattler went for 438 And 6 TDs This after I know he listened to Thinking Out Loud Where we suggested that South Carolina was having quarter Oh my God, Richard did this

Well, that we'd suggest This is Richard's fault We suggested that the punter You didn't suggest it Richard said this out loud in words Well, and so did I I that the punter for South Carolina Against Florida last week

Had as good a day as Spencer Rattler Which by the numbers is true And like Spencer Rattler's family had an issue with this with math yeah with math you know not the only people

who have issue with math but they had issue with that math in particular and yeah yeah so that's weird Spencer Rattler for the record is the originator of the

Alexa play What About Now by Lone Star meme and who he shook off that mantle tonight with alacrity yeah this is yes Tennessee is missing

Jeremy Banks. Yes, Jeremy Banks is the best player on Tennessee's defense. No, Tennessee's defense is not good, but that doesn't really explain the entire gap, including but not limited to. Once again, Columbia is a hellmouth. Hinden Hooker going down with a, I, listen, the sequence of events on camera make it look as though the non-contact knee injury that hindenhooker suffered caused his fumble like his knee did something that hurt so bad that the ball flew out of his hands i don't know if that's actually what happened but the sequence of events on film is knee goes sideways ball flies out of hand like at Columbia has Columbia turf monsters have tentacles this is terrifying anyway um hey remember that time i said i was only scared of two teams

and they were Kentucky in South Carolina. Yeah. This isn't why. This is not. I was scared of like dick tripping in this game, but I was not contemplating something like this. This is way worse. Ooh, this is way worse.

And it's okay to let it hurt. I don't want to get too Ted Lassow about it because now that's popular thing to do and I don't want to try hard. But I think that Josh Heipel had absolutely the correct attitude after the game. He's like, yeah, I really hope this hurts. on the way home. I'm like, oh, good. Okay. I hope that it hurts too because there were not enough,

not enough logical. Everything that Tennessee was missing and injured last night did not, did not add up to the sum total of what we shot of like the performance that we put on, which does mean that I get to blame the helmets, but still. Yeah. So be mad tonight. You should be mad tonight. This should not feel good, But also, if you had told me at the beginning of the season that I was looking at a potential, that I was looking at very minimum at a 9-1 Tennessee team that had beaten Florida, LSU, and Bama. Okay, like, be mad tonight, but tomorrow, I hope the attitude, if you feel bad about this, I hope the attitude you have tomorrow is, what are you really mad about, man? We're out so far over our skis already and have only lost.

two bloody teeth so far. Keep the gas down. And I think the main thing is now you don't have to play Georgia again. Oh, thank Christ. You get to do just a regular bowl game. We go to a good bowl. You go to a bowl game and you go to a bowl game that people will forget three days after it happened.

You go to the playoff and everyone remembers you lost to Georgia twice in the same season. Also, now we don't have to potentially play Michigan in the playoffs and that would be a terrible house-divided situation for the full cast itself. Well, and surely tear us all apart. I would really like your odds there because my sole basis on predicting what Michigan would or wouldn't do against Tennessee would be betting against the results of another game that they had against the team in Orange. They struggled.

It's a weird thing, you know, badly. It's a, like, that's the other reason I can't really feel bad about my team being the ones to It's just going around some days. It is just going around. It was after, it was like everyone else spent the mulligans and like the, the, the, the, the cats ran out of lives. And Tennessee was the left holding the stick. Tennessee was holding the stick. Illinois very nearly took the stick.

Illinois was the stick. They were the stick. Tommy DeVito. Brett Bima is like, that's my stick. That's my scratching stick. Gameplay. It's like penis. Yeah.

So it's the stick and stick. That's what we're going to do. Going to stick Michigan with it. And they did. His wife at a black jack table. Never, ever, ever forget. That's not a dis. That is not a dis.

Not at all. Just picked it right up, man. Blake Corm injured in this game. His status for the big game is TBD. He did walk away from his injury eventually, but nobody's real sure what's going on. So JJ McCarthy kind of looked a little bit like a liability at times,

missing some easy passes that were super open. So usual Michigan stuff, fortunately, Illinois was all down to turn this into a headbutting contest. And a headbutting contest is exactly the kind of thing that Jim Harbaugh really enjoys. So they did manage to pull this out with a game-winning field goal. Again, if you wanted Pete Big Ten this week, you got you some Pete Big Ten.

Game-winning field goals all over the place. Wait, I've been told that we triggered at least one person's Alexa to actually start playing Lone Star. What about now? I didn't know I could do this. Oh, shit. I'm definitely not going to use this for evil. Do it.

Alexa play Sandstorm. It's only fair. listen we all know that i'm an i'm a absolutely terrible winner but i am a gracious loser i make up for it by being a horrible fucking winner um also on the docket today by the way um of some interest um i just want to point out that the only time i looked up and i saw notre dame boston college is i looked up and it was 37-0 in a driving snowstorm from Boston College. You ever feel like the evidence is mounting over the past few years about what kinds of people God is choosing to test and what kinds of people he's choosing to reward?

Yeah. I like the Jesuits as those things go. Yeah. Why'd you have to do the Jesuits like that? They couldn't even look at their beloved space because of all the snow. Yeah. You were betwixt them in the cosmos. Come on.

How it's got to suck if you're from Boston. You live in Boston. They're like, yeah, for one. Okay. Yeah, I mean, yes. But also, hey, we're going to go on a road trip. We get to leave. We're going to North Indiana.

We're going to North Indiana. It's going to be spitting snow the entire time. Angry. That snow looked mad. It did not look soft. Then you have to go home to Boston. It's pretty snow. It's rough, B.C.

That's all I'm saying. rough and I respect it. Yeah, Boston sports fans. They've been through a lot. They've been through so many hard times. They're the only people who've never been through anything. Yeah, go to school in Boston. You know, in a day that

where most of the teams that I love suffered badly and my friend's team suffered badly, I would like to. Wait, hey, what other team that you love suffered badly? Florida lost to Vanderbilt. Ew. Yeah, no, that's the thing that happened.

You shouldn't do that. I don't think you should do that I agree for you I agree Lost to Vanderbilt And one of the deciding scores End up being a long snapper Recovering a muffed punt in the end zone

Uh huh That was a mad lib A dude with a jersey number of 47 Correct Scored a winning touchdown against the Florida Florida Gators Yeah That's awesome

Yeah no I mean good for him man That's the way to go that's how you're going to do it they also did have a field storming but it was like the slowest field storming anybody had ever seen like okay hold on let me get down there it was a field shuffling

was it like is this even worth storming the field for was it that kind of energy yeah there's just somebody in the booth at bandy who's like we're not going to write the check no we're going to get demerits for this like yeah you beat a team called the Florida Gators

but they're what six and five is that right six and five vandy is uh just vandy is five and six five oh no oh no so vandy needs ball eligibility next week oh no one more game for bowl eligibility no shit see all that stuff about like uh if you told you told you at the beginning of the year you could be in this place all that could go away fast nope i'm clinging i'm clinging to it You're weighing down the raft. Go ahead and drown.

I, um, I, oh, at least this feeling is familiar. My favorite thing about, uh, Vandy pulling off the wind, uh, other than a dude with jersey number 47 getting to score a touchdown is, um,

now Vandy is going to finish ahead of A&M in the SEC. Yes, that's all that matters. That's what we're here for. We're just helping. We're helping the jokes. Uh, numerologist, if you're out there, please figure out.

if this is the most points ever scored by someone wearing this jersey number in a college football game. That shouldn't be too hard. We also have, Jason, I just want to mention one more thing related to that game. For you haters out there who say that they wasted money by paying Jimbo Fisher $95 million to coach your football team. Texas A&M 20 UMass 3. That's right. I expect letters of apology to be written to one. He basically beat the founding fathers.

They were favored by 35 and they got halfway there against the worst team in FBS. Like the resounding consensus worst team in FBS. It was at 1.3 to 3 for far longer than it should have. but honestly, it felt like it was 10 to 3 for about four hours. That's not accurate, but it sure felt like it. It's an emotional truth, and we traffic in those here. There was a long period when the most exciting thing in the stadium was Aggie dudes and jeans, just random white boys running around the upper deck playing relay race with a towel or something.

And it went on a long time. It went on for like an hour until ESPN's cameras even picked, got bored enough to start commentating on it, at which point they weren't discussing what they're like. Are y'all a pollicule? They're like light blue like stonewash jeans. One of the announcers said, yeah, that's the color you want if you're running around in 40 degree rain. That was the most exciting thing that happened. That's the best thing A&M has done all season.

and that's that's really not even a joke it just is so yeah it's almost done ain't it's almost done it's almost over yeah one more one more one more one more one more one more one more game to lose and then you can uh start firing coordinators and stuff Alexa play throw mama from the train I don't actually have Alexa X I don't trust microphones in my home I'm just uh yeah I have Instagram shut up it sounds like you for the rest of y'all I think technically at this point you have like a distributed botnet of Alexis this is great we should do this we should do this for something worse though um I also want to talk about the other most important matchup of the night it's one that we haven't discussed then I don't think you'll hear

discussed on any other college football show and that would be the trios match in AEW uh full gear the pay for view yeah if you didn't penta yes yes if you didn't see it uh It was spectacular, and the Triangelo de Lomorte ended up prevailing, even though Ray Phoenix had to end the match by hitting a man in the head with a tiny hammer. And he felt real guilty about it. It was great. He hit a man, he knocked the dude out to win the match, and he immediately began displaying anguish that he had done it.

It's my second favorite wrestling thing. My first favorite being somebody scampering away with the belt after they stole. of somebody, right? Naila doing this amazing, that was previously on, but Naila did an amazing skitter. Like, you could actually hear the cartoon, like, you could hear the cartoon Pizzicado in the background, though, like, bum, bum, bum, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, right? Yes. Yes. This was a, this was a big W for Death Triangle with the elite returning from the CM punk thing that we discussed on an episode like months ago. Yeah, I was really glad I had that background. This was Kenny Omega and the Young Bucks, their first matchback,

and you would expect them to win, you know, triumphantly in their big return, but no, not only did they go down to, you know, did they lose to one of the best three man-tag teams in all of wrestling. The crowd, the crowd is on that triangle side. That's right. Despite, you know, despite like three of the most popular wrestlers in the company coming back, That was pretty great. Like the crowd was like, no, it's great, you're back, but you kind of have to, you know, earn your way back to the top.

And then AW announced, oh, you like that match? Well, it turns out it was the first of a best of seven. You're going to see this once a week for the next two months. Honestly, I don't hate it. And the reaction I saw everywhere was like, holy shit, that's a lot. But okay. Yeah, sure. I'll watch all seven.

We've done worse. It also gave me an idea. for a new on a night of announcing innovations elsewhere where we had our beloved oh my god i just realized their name is literally rogers and heart how has disney not done anything with that on a night of other announcing innovations i would like to propose what one of our twitter followers called a masked man in every booth and the the message for this the the method of This is very simple. You take an announcing team, any announcing team, all announcing teams.

So let's go with Kirk and Chris. Keep them exactly as they are. Change, change absolutely nothing about what they do, what they say, what they wear, except in between them in the booth, you put Vampiro. Yeah, I love it. Yeah. Every announcing team, every announcing team has a luchador in the middle. Or you just put Pentagon Dark, speaking Spanish, right?

Just sitting there like delivering. Or just malevolently silent the whole time. Like it'll be a surprise every time. Just glowering and occasionally being like, Don't you want that for Greg McElroy? I think there is an easy, like the Fox NFL broadcasts, for whatever reason, when they do booth shots, they haven't been doing straight on to the two main announcers.

They've been doing side shots. So you see the researchers to the side of them, like Greg Olson's researcher, it's, it looks like the two Hemsworths and one of them is in Thor mode. Like, it's what it looks like Greg Olson and his researcher who they call Thor because he looks like Thor. So you can easily do this. You just take that broadcast style and slap a mask on the research guy. I think Luchador's are great at research. Yeah. I agree.

You know, they're very, they're very, according to. And reptilian contacts, him on all of them, please. They're very, they're scrupulous, they're detail-oriented. They're born entertainers. Detectives. Also, I think that everyone, you know, I love the silent air of menace maybe that they provide to commentators that maybe we're not so fond of. Also, if you have a football game with a score like 16 to 6, don't you want someone who can, Start defense.

Break out a shooting star press off, you know, like throw a little bit of action into things. You see the vision, yeah. Yeah, 100%. Also, MJF is your new world champ. Yes, he is. Due to dastardly shenanigans, as you guys per usual. Well, that's exactly, I don't want MJF to be champion if, I don't want him to be champion if it's under fair circumstances.

I want skullduggery. I want definite dastardly villainous vibes off of it. But, you know, don't give me that shit. Show me the most dastardly man alive. Also, I need him to get on and do exactly what he did, which is wherever he's at, he does the heel-turn thing on that city, right? He's like, oh, I'm here in Charlotte. Charlotte's a beautiful city, home of Rick Flair.

Woo-woo. A scumb bag! Yeah. He's so, like, he's so, like, lots of wrestlers have tried to do, like, meta shit and he's one who actually he will he will come out and he'll basically say like i am cutting a face promo everyone goes along with it and then he said he will basically almost literally say and now i am in heel mode everyone goes along with it it's it's it's it's it's it's it's some of the craziest shit i've ever seen in wrestling it's so good it's so good they have

so many good things going on right now and then like not just not just the insane like you know, not just the insane luchador tag team where one of them feels like he has to have a special outfit, even though he's already wearing an outfit. I love that about Penta, like last thing about this. Penagon is, say a bad word about my dad. Pentagon is my favorite because Pentagon will be like, hmm, I wear a skull mask and white contacts with blue eyes in them. But for this, I think I'm going to be that dressed up as the Joker. Or for St. Patrick's day, he's like, I will be iraids. Penta.

It's like my favorite Halloween decoration, which is a small stuffed animal bird that is dressed as a mummy that is itself dressed as a as a tuxedo cat. Yes. So like over the mummy wrappings, it has a little cat mask and a little jacket. It's like when Goldie dresses up for Halloween in different things. So it's a man dressed as a gopher dressing up as, you know, Freddie Kruger. You know, speaking of Halloween, when dead things rise, when, when things that we swore were gone, reemerge, the Utah Uts have tied it up with Oregon in the third quarter. I thought we were going to bedlam, sorry.

Oh, no, no, that's just dead. That's good and dead. Deadlam Dead lambs As always As always Oklahoma State Oklahoma when they lock horns

So many things can happen All of them involve Oklahoma winning And that's That's what happened It was 28 to nothing And very little happened after that Oklahoma State Man

They started real hot Now they're staring down the barrel of 7 and 5, 7 and 6 things go poorly down the end. What started all of that, by the way? I want to go ahead and loop us all the way back to the start. They were doing fine.

Things were sensical. They were winning games. They were 5 and 0. And then on October 15th, they got a little bit of that blood in their eyes from a meat ass. They had to deal TCU bullshit. Yeah, they did. They were like, oh, here for it. Oh my God, this is a level of bullshit we've never experienced and from that point forwards after their first loss it's been

uh it's been win over texas and which we all know that means nothing uh and then uh they they've been three they've been one and three ever since including uh including yes today's loss to uh a crap oklahoma team like this is it's a crap yeah and i say that is i say that because i know crap teams uh my crap team lost Vandy today. They're having a crap year. They're both six and five. Both these crap teams. That's right. Six and five crap team. Hey. Preseason

Preseason number nine, Oklahoma did earn itself a bowl-bound t-shirt today. So. Congratulations. Bull-bound Oklahoma. We hit that bullet. Listen, man. Florida hit that bull-bound shirt and they were like, done. Ciesta. Done. Sometimes you just really want to go to Shreveport. It's, yeah, it's when you go to a concert.

and you say, I just want to look at the merch and then we can bail. That's what Florida did this year. Sorry, the heart. I just want a shirt. The heart craves scenic, bosure city. That's all we want. Oh, God, that was really upsetting to hear. It sure is.

It's very upsetting. Looking at the chat, by the way, hello again to Joel Anderson. Oh, look, we got Gojo in here. My goal is what's going on? Late night listeners who are giving us the energy to finish this up. Did we miss anything? Have we missed anything? Did we miss anything?

I want to note Navy and Army defeated opponents today, UCF and Yukon, who are opposites in one of college football's greatest rivalries, the civil conflict. Navy Army, of course, have a disagreement of their own. But, yeah, it just felt a little bit noteworthy to see, you know, The sports two greatest rivalries, Army Navy and the Civil Conflict, come together on the day and Army Navy prevailed. Jason, thank you for the extra annunciation you put on conflict to show, respect to both parties. The C.T. is capitalized, so you have to.

Yeah. I think if I had to note anything, I would probably note the moment in Iowa State, Texas Tech, when a Texas Tech player absolutely shoved an Iowa State player who fell theatrically down on the ground backwards to elicit the flag for unsportsmanlike and then had a teammate come over and immediately begin administering fake CPR on him. Really good chess compressions too, actually. They should use that in some sort of training video. Yeah, congratulations to them on some excellent theatrics in pantomime livening up an otherwise dreary low-scoring game between those two. Yeah, let's see. see um what else was there oh one of my favorite things of today was i don't think we talked about

ohio state yet was um during illinois michigan ohio state fans having a good laugh laughing it up really enjoying their time um and sports fans are always like this right we're not big on thinking ahead to the bad things that could happen to ourselves nope um and then ohio state found themselves having to exert effort for four hours to put away the mighty Maryland Terrapins. The final score is highly deceptive, folks. There is a bullshit touchdown within the final seconds. Ohio State was in deep peril, endangered losing this game. I would like to shout out one particular touchdown pass by Tugavaloa, the younger,

which it's just going to appear. If you want to go look at this for yourself, if ESPN has posted the it'll show up in the box score as two-yard touchdown pass which is such a poor descriptor that I don't even want to try and describe the distance between the words two-yard touchdown pass and what actually happened Spencer you went back and watched this one in slow-mo a couple of times do you want to do you want to lay it out for folks yeah this is the one where moving to his right on fourth and seven first fall is fourth thing down and goal.

Yeah, it's fourth and goal, basically. They started at the seven, and Talia Tugaviloa gets the pass, begins rolling to his right in the manner, which to me says, I will either gain two yards before being knocked out of bounds and there will be a turnover on downs, or I will drift right, throw the ball out of the back of the end zone, or I will throw... And there's nothing happening. There's nothing there. Absolutely nothing there.

And he waits until he is within the three, the last possible three... three inches of legal turf before going out of bounds and whips the ball to a receiver who slides not open and it's just not open like dude is like triple at least double covered maybe triple I'd have to go back and watch and you know people will say oh he threw it to a mailbox no no through it to a mailbox yeah like an actual mailbox threw it clean in for a touchdown so Stealing Stetson Bennett Valor Yeah Stealing

Well he you know it's not anymore Since he's forfeited that He's now the milk fan Anyway he had a he had a rough night At other points of the game And of course it didn't turn out the way We all hoped it might But oh Jesus

That was a beautiful play Running gag I would like to cite a running gag The running gag this season A doomed Louisville team Oh I forgot about this Seeking to part company with its coach that they don't really feel and the coach who's not really feel in the program.

And all that this team keeps doing is winning. Because number 24 NC State got ham blasted by the Louisville Cardinals. Satterfields in his office after the game just looking down at his hands like, where are these powers come from and how can I put them back? All I want to do is lose respectfully. get out of here and they just keep winning Louisville 7 and 4

and 4 in the ACC better record in conference than the valued and respected Dave Doran in NC State yeah yeah that's that just keeps happening a running gag that I can't get

enough of I would also like to note this that don't look y'all either of you okay what do each of you think Penn State's record is this year? What does it feel like their record is? Don't what do you think it is?

After today. Seven? No, six. Seven. I will say that I will say that I would agree with you without looking that up, Jason. Seven and, because I don't know when their biweek was. I think it's nine, but feel, yeah, feel more like six or seven. That is correct.

They're nine and two, but they feel like if you, You would ask me ten times, I would have been like, ah, they won like seven games, maybe six. Yeah, it's, it's, it's kind of fucked up. They're like, they're good. Yeah. They were getting a run from Rutgers for a minute today. Like, once again, not in any way that was, in keeping with the rest of a bunch of other teams were getting runs today, but.

It ended up 55 to 10. Yeah, yeah, I suppose there is that. So looking at the computer composite, they were seventh. in the country entering today and should remain right around there. They don't feel like the seventh best team in the country. Oh, they don't. It's so weird. But I generally trust... They're playing that week Big Ten schedule.

Yeah. I generally trust the computers, but... I'm sorry, I couldn't do that with a straight face. I'm a little skeptical on this time around. Remember when we were just... I have additional comedy. Would you like some additional comedy? comedy? Usually, yeah.

After beating Arkansas by a score of 2119, in consecutive weeks, the Liberty Flames have lost to Yukon, 3633. And today, to give them their third victory on the season, the Virginia Tech Hokies beat them 23, 22, bringing Virginia Tech to a mighty three and eight. Did BYU was trailing at one point today to a team that I swear to God I've never heard of?

And I used to cover mid-majors for a living. I think they, I think they changed their name. What the fuck is Utah Tech? I think they used to be called something else. Okay, that makes me feel a lot better. They used to be called Dixie State. Yeah. Oh, it's those.

Okay. Okay, that does make a lot more sense. Which is a name you, you don't want to be called. Especially if you're in fucking Utah. Noted Confederate Stronghold of Utah. If my redneck ass drove up to some place in Utah and saw Dixie State, I would do the quickest you turn peel out. Apparently, the reasoning for it is they are from a region of the state called Utah's Dixie.

You know. That's not better. Yeah. This is the Dixie of Utah eject. Blow self up. Those sleight bells are jingling and I am ring tingling. way the fuck out there. I'm not even getting out of the car.

I'm drawing a gun immediately. I'm like, get back. I don't care who you are. Fallout. Utah's Dixie. Also, oh, God, this is the last thing. I'm just picturing Dixie Kong,

but no, that can't be right. Indiana 39, Michigan State, 31. When did that happen? Michigan State laws. to Indiana. It took overtime to get to that many points, but. This was a, this was also weirdly presaged by, I don't know if you've noticed that the ESPN scoreboard has just been fucked up and malfunctioning and weird and

entertaining ways all season. But before the game even started today, the Michigan Indiana game said, just said end of at the top with no numbers. So it just said end of Michigan, Indiana, or an end of Michigan. against state Indiana, and it sure was. Total passing yards for Indiana's starting quarterback, Dexter Williams. Brace yourselves against something sturdy. Two for seven for 31 yards.

Fucking hell. What the fuck is this? NFT stands for no fucking touchdowns. They scored 39 points while completing two passes. They completed two passes and only have. 11 first downs. All right. What the fuck am I looking at here?

No, I don't know. I'll ask it. We're all thinking it. Is Michigan State a troop? Michigan's still, well, if they're a troop, then they're from a very troubled branch of the military. Yeah, like I said. Yeah. We've talked about the Spartan Army before.

You would think Indiana must have like, you know, rushed their asses off. and they did pretty well on the ground, but they only carried the ball 44 times. Like, they just, they didn't really do offense today. Michigan State, meanwhile, hammered out 540 yards with a loss to show for it. Exactly what we expect to see. You might think a million turnovers were the reason. No, there was only one all day.

What the fuck happened here? I don't know. This is the weirdest box score. I feel like we're trying to reconstruct a plane crash from a, a black box that's just like full of snails. There's a long, there's a long kick return. Okay, there's that. There's a blocked field goal in OT that kept things alive.

Uh-huh. All right, so there's a blocked field goal that sort of kept things alive. All I'm seeing is the one kick return. And that doesn't do enough to explain. No, that doesn't do enough to sit. You completed two passes and only had 11 first downs and you're sitting on 39 points with only one turnover. Indiana, explain yourself. If you're an astrologer and you're in the comments,

please weigh in here with your theories. I am baffled. Was the interception run back for a touchdown? No. There's no excuse for this. Absolutely none. I am, whew. Congratulations, though. Oh, it looks like Indiana's like one play of the day was a long touchdown run.

Even still. Even when you add all those up together, Yeah. I'm not sure this makes up for what we see here. Indiana is grifting. Some sort of points grift going on. You know, that's got to be the MLM-heavyest state in the union. We should have, they're selling leggings or something for points.

Just eventually, listen, if you keep wandering around on the field, eventually you've got to bump into the end zone. It's got to happen. Not just leggings. They're a lifestyle. Shout out Montana State. Not only did they get a lot of attention this morning. They beat the shit out of their rivals. Could enter playoff season with a number one seed.

I guess we'll see. That's tomorrow, I think. And did they add to their track record of scoring points via opponent botched punt snaps? They did. Oh, fantastic. happened again. Wonderful. Yeah, Montana State had 439 yards on the ground.

400. While they were up 41 to 7, they had a tight end throw a touchdown pass. So this is that kind of a fuck you, fuck you day. That kind of rivalry. Just to, they're trying to keep warm, man. Yeah. The big, it was a fantastic. That young man exercises arms.

It was a fantastic day for the big sky and not just for that Sacramento State. the game winning score for the Sacramento State are they the Hornets is that the Sacramento State Hornets the guy did a flip like he was hit midair and the ball carrier did a complete flip

and came to a standing landing just like yeah no hit bloop bahaha I will paste prestige it was it was it was absolutely prestige hornets I like it

it yeah it was it was the prestige hornet did the flip into the end zone so congratulations to them and all of the exciting things happening for of course the finest football conference in the land i think i'm i think i'm done we're currently uh in action Utah and Oregon still tied at 17 someone someone's manhood will be reclaimed or Oh, wow. Repode. Whatever verb we are careeting into, I am not ready for it. Nothing good is happening coming out of this sentence, no.

Let's get you out of here on this. Spencer, your boy, Jake Hainer, CBS sports during their game tonight. They're up big over Nevada. Of course they are. Put up a graphic. Jay Canter's weekly schedule. You ready for this? I've never been more ready for anything.

Daily post-practice arm care, chiropractor, hyperbaric chamber. laser treatments, shockwave therapy, dry needling, soft tissue work, ankle treatment slash checkups, flush massage, IV therapy, and three hours of extra film work. I guess while you're having all these medical treatments, you might as well watch some film. The young man plays football like a person who requires that much medical treatment. So all of us makes sense. Just get him out there. You know what? Artist teamwork. Great, great artist. his teamwork. I love this.

They're just... It takes a village. They're just treating him like a Jaeger, right? He's kind of built like a Jaeger. Apply the restorative oils. Prayers for the emperor. Anoint him. Anoint him.

Oh, that's beautiful. I'm so happy to hear that. Shouts out to Jake Hainer and Fresno State. Just keep our boy upright. Keep our boy upright with his nine hours. Please keep our boy upright. People's Heisman, 2021. Yeah, because he won't.

He won't to make any effort to do that. So you're going to have to go ahead. Nope. He's too busy kicking ass and throwing names. That's right. Not interested in his personal safety. That is how you end up needing 17 different health care professionals just to get through the, just to get through like classes.

Like LeBron is looking at him going like, that's a bit much. That's a bit much. LeBron wishes he had this level of, I don't know, naveling. LeBron was like, hey, listen, I knew Jay Caner was going to be something back when I saw him play in 1990. When I saw Jake Hainer coming out of high school, I thought, man, one day, that guy is going to require 35 hours per day of medical care. Jay Canaan go on the shop. Did you see, did either of you see LeBron talking about his Madden strategy and the defenses that he called with Sean McVe? because the Rams at one point had done some sort of defensive call.

And on his podcast show thing, LeBron was like, yeah, you know. LeBron has a podcast. He didn't need money. Well, he was like, so yeah, you know, like they, it's a show. And he's like, yeah, you know, Sean Mavé must be peeking at my Madden's screen. And, you know, because I do that all the time. And he said that and they flashed to Jalen Ramsey's face. He was on the set.

And Jailen Ramsey's face just lit up like with the kind of look of somebody who's just an instigator like he lit up for a second he falls and he goes jalen ramsie play football you're aware yeah so jailen rams looks over and goes well you know how they talk about you on twitter lebron you sure you sure that's what you call and everyone in the room immediately bust out laughing including lebron uh what a wonderful moment in the bullshit so lebron is aware of the lebron oh lebron is aware of the lebron oh lebron is a aware of the LeBron is lying on Twitter meme. LeBron will lean into it until even more grang-grangy has lies.

Just lie bigger, lie bigger. You know, I knew, listen, man, I knew that I knew that Richard Millhouse Nixon was going to be something when I saw him hooping. You've got to stop complimenting Nixon. Even if you think it's a joke. It's after a while, it starts to stick. Thanks to everyone for joining.

us tonight on the full cast after dark thanks to among others james tyler morgan moriarty what's up uh and the eastern eastern kentucky thank you eastern kentucky thank you eastern kentucky thank you samford what's up sanford thank you big sky as always hope you enjoyed thank you big sky for all the feed updates that you sent me that's not weird thank you eastern kentucky thank you samford mm-hmm thanks to uh let's see let's go wait let's go way down here uh thanks to uh Chris Olson, Amy Lee. These are people I don't know, but you stopped by, so thank you. Joel Anderson, number one fan of the only, only, only number one team in our hearts,

at least on Channel 6, TCU Hornfrogs. That is true. TCU, here for some bullshit. But thank you for. Stop calling it bullshit, man. It's the best. Did they win or did they not? They won.

It's total bullshit. Total bullshit, but man, sports is W. Don't look at it. Don't look at it. It's awesome. That's blood in their eyes. It's not protein. Don't look at it.

Good night.