Shutdown Fullcast - FULLCAST AFTER DARK - Week 10 College Football Recap: Guest Starring Connor Stalions (Probably?)

Episode Date: November 5, 2023

SHOW NOTES Some real vintage Fullcast audio here this week with Ryan calling in from the field while Jason once again floats between the realms Bedlam saves the best for last Big Iowa Hole news! Army-Air Force: security concerns abound! Indiana had 20 first downs and 261 yards of offense And so much more Visit sunny preownedairboats.com! Subscribe to Vacation Bible School and Channel 6 and Buried Treasure! Listen to We’re Not All Like This and DNF! Sign your name away in full faith to Shutdown Fullbooks! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Get $250 when you join Ramp for free. Just go to ramp.com slash easy. Ramp.com slash easy, Ramp.p.com slash easy. Current's issued by Sutton Bank and Celtic Bank members of DIC terms and conditions apply. He's spent two and a half minutes and Bud Elliott has not responded to my text. Is he alive? Somebody tell me if you're watching him live. Maybe he's in some sort of cryostasis.

Actually, Bud going directly into a cryotube for healing immediately after a game just so he could start using his thumbs again the next morning. I buy that completely. I like the idea of Bud doing that if he lost and had a bad weekend gambling. Like if he was like, he was like, oh man, the Vig, the Vig is just, it's not worth it. I got to go, I got to go into cry of sleep. I think my computer's dying. I might not make it. Oh, shit.

Is it? I'll be back if I'm back. All right. Well, start driving and you can be at my house in like 45 minutes. Yeah. Let me tell you what. I'm going to go ahead and say this. There's a commenter on LinkedIn.

Shouts out to our LinkedIn listeners. Helen, Jane DeMarch says, The bravest people in the world. She says, I have been selling cheese all day and have no idea what happened. Helen, you and Alex Grinch, same person, same person. Alex has just been out there selling cheese. Hang on, before we get to there,

I promise that I would do Lincoln Riley's skincare routine at the top of the show. Mm-hmm. All right, wait, wait, wait, hold on. Make Spencer yell welcome first. Welcome to the fullcast after dark for men Welcome to the full cast after dark

B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-T-A-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K. It was trying to wake up to wake up the dogs, and then that actually did wake up the dogs. That's right there. I like that you're turning into a gremlin right now, like an explosive gremlin. Man, you got a Muppet Baby's defense. You get a Muppet Baby's theme. That's a Muppet Baby's-ass defense at USC is playing. Holly, please regale us with Lincoln Riley's skincare routine.

I just had a recommendation because he's not aging well. The sun and the wind and the dry heat and the dry cold. I'll take different kinds of tolls on one's complexion and hair. But I have an extremely quick turnaround question for him for how to lose 205 unsightly pounds of bone and gristle. And that would be firing Alex Grinch. Listen, you know, I understand where you're coming from, but you know what Alex Grinch

didn't do today? Lose the bedroom game. I would like you to know that I've been trying to fact-checked this joke for the past five minutes, by which I mean, I texted Bud Elliott and said, how much do you think Alex Grinch weighs? But he is doing his own show right now, selfishly. What a hater. What a hater.

I know. But listen, if you don't know this about Bud, this is one of my favorite things about Bud. He is fucking terrifying at guessing weights, like a carnival person. Like, he can wait and age. He can do it like a fucking carnival barker. It's absolutely terrifying. So if you ever need to know the dimensions or age of a given person that you can't find, just call Bud. He knows. I promise he knows. But what does, what does King, in the Marvel comic book universe way. That depends on the artist. Like, is it perfectly squared off kingpin?

Because that's actually fairly easy to calculate. All right. Well, never mind then. This is why Bud and I are friends. She's selling Helen. What game do you want to know about? She's selling Helen. Respond in the comments.

And I'm fine with, I also know very little. I mean, just broadly, but from today, I know about some games, but not all games. Well, let me tell you about a little game we call Bedlam, because I think that's a good place to start. I hate doing this one without Jason here. I know, I know. He's going to come back, though.

All right. Or we're going to have to return to it on Tuesday or something, because it feels very wrong to say goodbye to this particular game, given what happened. Please send blood to Jason until he is strong enough to return to the forecast. After blood into his computer. No, y'all, his computer just died. It's fine. It's fine. You pour blood on the computer and then the computer works again. Blood for the Blood Blog. Yeah, he has the Warhammer corn computer.

That's what USB port stands for. Your slimy blood. Y'all, I don't think Miami's going to pull this together. No, don't think that's happening either. Don't think that's happening. I'll be Jason. Yeah, so let me tell you about a little game we'd like to call Bedlam. Oh, I'm sorry. You want to be, you literally be Jason. Now we're good. All right.

This is a game where Oklahoma always wins. Anything can happen, of course, but Oklahoma always wins. Oh, we might have Jason back here. Let's see if his computer is not dead. We've added him back. But this is a game where- Don't give up blood, friends. Keep sending blood through the Internet.

Yes. Keep download. your hands clap your hands if you believe in jason download the computer blood app the computer blood app i just realized i'm basically describing peter theo's belief system so ah this blood will keep me young this blood in the computer will save my life is this person is hang on i'm putting this up is this a dis sean i don't understand is that supposed to be a threat yeah i don't know what that is Sean. But, you know, that's fine. It's important to remember that tweets are legally binding and definitely have a lifespan longer than three seconds.

Someone's trying to sass us. Listen, you know who you should sass. The University of Sassy Chaps, USC, I don't know. I was going somewhere like that. And Jason dropped off again because you didn't put enough blood to your computer friend. It didn't. You should have had some things. You don't need all of it. Oh shit.

Colorado's playing. Sort of. Hang on. Oh, yeah. Look at that from, uh, let me change the channel. All right. All right. So Oklahoma always wins Bethlehem except.

Except when they don't, like today. Okay. Okay. Which today was the last one. That's the phrase. Yeah. Yes. Which today was the last one.

And that's what makes this so funny that Oklahoma came into the rivalry that it owned so completely that it was a running gag that they could not lose it. And and yes, a meek shall inherit the earth moment in the classic plot twist of all plot

twists. Who gets to leave the building with the fucking belt? That's right. Meek, Mike Gundy. That's right. Mike Gundy who said today, I like to go home and drink Diet Coke until I pass out and watch film. And somebody

asked him what his favorite kind of diet coke was and he said whiskey i love that that's like my five-year-old yeah that's like what do you want to be when you grow up and they're like i'm a vegetable mike gundy's food pyramid is somehow a figure eight it's a figure eight and that's the healthiest opinion i've ever heard mike gundy express in public yeah mike gundy and i like the worst part is that mike gundy and i like everyone probably has one opinion they share with Mike Gundy you know like Mike Gundy probably is like you know dentistry's is kind of a scam and I'd be like you know what you know now don't put him in your corner we don't have corners the world circular expensive the corner where

dentistry is a scam is empty except for you buddy I like this idea that Mike Gundy is not a flat earther he's a anti right angles earther like yes but okay bud says 185 okay I'm downward downward okay see my original is 190 so i feel better according to mike gundy because the earth is a globe everything on it is also round and squares are the lie that we have been given that took 11 minutes and 30 seconds but but it does indeed have his own show to do so i will not hear a word against him that was pretty good um from shahan jaya rajah by the way colorado's played five drives since demoting offensive coordinator sean lewis for pat shirmer the buffaloes of average 2.04 yards for play, which is fine.

You just get them on fifth down. What exactly happened in Bedlam, Spencer Hall? What happened in Bedlam is this, that Oklahoma could not put this thing away. Oklahoma had chances, chances, multiple, multiple chances to put this sucker away, and they just missed on all of them, all of them. Dilla Gabriel took a walloping in this game. Like he got clobbered. He nevertheless had 344 yards passing.

He was limited on the ground, mostly because he kept getting driven into it by the Oklahoma State defense. And Ollie Gordon, Ollie Gordon kept it solid. I thought that was a given, given how productive he's been out of the backfield. If you don't know Ollie Gordon, the second, he is the running back who's come on and really given Oklahoma State and offensive identity. But 48-year-old Alan Bowman, okay, Alan Bowman, who's in, like, his 27th year of college,

passed for 334 yards and was unreal today. So that's how they did it. The Oklahoma State defense clamped down and kept Oklahoma from finishing it off when they had a couple of different shots to, like, really ice this game. They refused to let that happen. So just an ecstatic moment,

for Oklahoma State. If you've never been to Stillwater, it's cool as hell. It's a great trip. I encourage you to go. They have the best gear for a reason, because Stillwater, Stillwater is quietly pretty damn stylish. Hi, can everyone hear me? Oh my gosh. Hi. I too on my phone. I am joining Ryan as a telephone user. So the technology advantage has been drawn to a standstill. Let's see if I give you, can I give you an avatar? Let's find out. All I saw so far was someone said, I'm really regretting my tweet this morning.

I don't know what that means. I have no memory of anything. Neither do we. Also, Grady, you said the dentist is the only medical professional that will upsell you. That is not at all true. No, actually, I tell, if a cardiologist was like, buddy, we can give you like 70 additional horsepower on that thing. I'd be like, hell yeah, let's gas it up. Let's go.

Who want the bonus aorta? about bedlam this was uh this was easily one of the results in college football history considering the the history of that rivalry and everything that it has pointed toward the entire time for oklahoma state to laugh last i mean it's it's just it subverts everything oklahoma leaving um roger posting video of juk playing we are never getting back together as the France stormed the field. Yeah, no, it was classic. There's a number of really funny things that happened today.

This is the funniest on like a historical identity politics way. Like, it's the funniest. It's the best that Oklahoma State managed to go ahead and poop in the house and shut the door before Oklahoma could get out of it. Like, it's absolutely amazing. I was going to say, like, when I saw the score, for whatever reason Goodbye Earl started like playing in my head

Why don't you lay down and sleep? Ain't it, Mark? This is They tasted okay to me. Just Brett Venables horking them down like, oh no! I also wanted to say it was great that in the middle of the giant

sucking hole that was Iowa and Northwestern. There was literally a giant sucking hole on the field. I need to know about this. I need to know. We have multiple questions saying, y'all talk about the big hole yet. What happened? There's just a big giant hole in the middle of the turf.

There was a, the ref had to stand around and have a stomping party to stomp the grass back into place. And in the process of doing that, they looked exactly the same as a Big Ten West offense, moving their feet and not going anywhere. Love it. this was but by the way they got to half time scoreless the over under for the second half was 14 and we barely cracked it barely cracked it but we did it baby the the specter of overtime in this one was horroar because like it could have gone to 60 overtime and then you know what a bad beat

that would be when they finally cracked 30 points in the in the 85th frame I just saw like Tony patini standing there with the officiating like the head of officiating in the booth with a pistol to his head going end it end it now please remind me

what do the Big Ten West standings look like tonight Spencer Holly and Jason absolute log jam right well I have some I have an update for you well there is kind of a log jam

but there's a team of topped it. You know what? You know what? Floating at the top of the Big Ten West with a 7-2 record overall and a 4-and-2 record in conference with 81 points

4 and 86 points against. Stand the proud Iowa Hawkeyes. Vegas turn in this toilet, motherfuckers. The log jump often, as it were. You know, eventually, you're no longer an obstruction.

You're a dam. And when you're a dam, you're a civic necessity, a monument to engineering brilliance. More like a big football team. Yeah. I like that coming into the season. It was like $3.25. What a hilarious meme number. Of course they'll get that.

And now it's like they're going to win their division and they're not going to get to $2.25. It is worth stopping to appreciate. How hard it is to make many ball games, like, if you saw somebody driving half a car down the highway, pick which half, left or right, front, or back, and they successfully made it 50 miles, even though it was a terrible idea, you would have to stop it just, like, marvel at. And that's what Iowa football is. It's half a car successfully going to work it back. There was a stat.

i think it was i think it was non-mormon who are about uh the number of times a team has won while scoring 10 or fewer points and kirk ferrin filed by only tommy tubberville in this millennium in that is that is quite a class to be in as far as obstructed things just an extraordinary day in a lot of different respects the to go to the exact opposite stat of what you were talking about, 166 points overall is the total that has been scored by the Iowa Hawkeyes, allowed by the USC Trojans on defense, 345 points. 345 points, including tonight's result, which there are, if I was just, if you did not see this And you said, oh, man, this is just going to look like, you know, like two teams playing without any defense.

I would be like, you know what? That's a simpleton's read of the situation. And tonight a simpleton is absolutely correct. That is exactly what happened in this game. 52, 42. And looking at the highlights, it's not even like, oh, this defense was gashed by, like, well-designed, thoughtful plays. Just like, nope, just fucking, here's Caleb Williams running around for 15 seconds and hucking the ball and oh, it's a touchdown. There was some design.

Like, at least a couple really, like, two of the honestly strangest plays I've ever seen were mixed in here. The one, the USC flea flicker that is still confused me very greatly. I've watched it about 20 times and I have no, like, it starts as, it's like, you know, the running. to the left but then it's a butt back and then a pitch to the quarterback and it all looks completely ad-libbed like the pitch and williams accepting it but there's a guy running down field uh wide open for the touchdown that it did one of the least explicable plays of everything you know you know that thing teams don't do it that often anymore you know where you'd see like the quarterback would start to walk off the field and like look to the

sideline as if like hey what are we doing but that was all a ruse and then they'd snap it to like the halfback and that that was the whole thing that's what a lot of the u s the u sc offense feels like is like and maybe it's just because they're going against alex gritch's defense all week that it's like well why not have fun yeah like they have a lot of plays where you go you need to protect for 11 seconds to let this happen it worked in practice and that's kind of the epitome of that right we really stick our time and let this marinate um good luck good luck shik bears i mean go work that is not the stat that that i that absolutely boggled me it is not okay the stat that absolutely boggled me was this it was a relatively pedestrian night from michael pennix junior yardage wise

and in terms of production usually he's throwing for like six ds and 400 yards it's like two fifty six and two t ds he also threw a pick um that's not the thing. Washington was averaging around 104 yards rushing coming into this game. Not a serviceable rushing team, but not a, not anything. I wouldn't even call them a rushing team. They're a passing team that had

like a competent rush element. Tonight, against USC, they ran 42 times for 316 yards. They averaged 7.5 a carry and they ran for 5 TDs. They had a really cool play as well where they

lined up in the wildcat and then shifted into a normal football play and Michael Pennix threw a touchdown. Yeah. Kirk Herb Street on the broadcast said that Dylan Johnson ran for 199 yards before contact. That means you or I could probably run for 50. Like 50. Yeah, I think we could get a all total a first down. I think we could do that. Yeah, which is disgraceful absolutely disgraceful i just coming into this day um i had looked up where lincoln riley's defenses had finished during his time as a head coach i don't know information with me because i'm walking around the street because my computer almost blew up or whatever but uh his defenses have been very bad for like seven years there was a 100-ish finish in yards

for play at oklahoma there was like a 76 or what i don't know i i just it this this man is just a a less beautiful cliff very that's it i don't think you'll ever have a good defense i don't think it matters the let the grink go the grink is good the grink was good at washington state he'll have a good defense against somewhere else um not here it doesn't matter no fowler fowler referred to it on the broadcast as a bend then break defense sometimes it doesn't even bend that's the guy calling the game That's the objective professional describing things accurately. It's like a karate demonstration.

Oh, man, those boards fucking exploded. That's what they're here to do. But feel proud that you did it anyway. There are two games that I would like to ask about. I saw neither of them. But I feel we would be remissing on bringing the bump. One, go Hoosier? Go Hoosier.

And then the second, which you can take these in either order, because again, I am in the car. What the fuck happened in Army Air Force? Ah, yeah. I can hit that one if you like. Spencer, do you on Hoosier Beat? I will go on Hoosier Beat. Hit Army first. Okay, so the short of it is Air Force lost five, there's seven fumbles, and Army lost none.

Okay. And that's pretty much like option teams are. so like you watch an option team all year long and there's this tension of like oh my god i can't believe they're catching all these pitches and then one day they don't yeah um i will tell you what happened in indiana wisconsin and it's that wisconsin had two turnovers indiana had none if i can give you an extraordinary number indiana had 21st downs but they only had 261 yards of offense which i'm still trying to do the math on that and And I encourage you to do that as well.

It feels like some sort of unproven theorem that a dead mathematician leaves to his intellectual errors to figure out how you get 21st downs off of just 261 yards of offense. Thrift! That's how the Hoosiers beat Wisconsin. Profligate spending by the Badgers undid them. And Midwestern Thrift and economy really saved Tommy. Oh, yeah. Those are some dollar general first down. I'm like, why would I get 15 yards for a first down when I only 10?

That's just silly. You know what it was? The yards get the first down, and then there's no reason to keep to make it harder after that. It was Bogo first downs. That's what it was. The best sat in the Big Ten West today, I think, was North Western's nine and a half minute 88-yard drive that produce zero points. Is it better than Mississippi State's 12 minutes? it 20 play 80 plus yard drive for three points 12 you burned a quarter brother to get three points

Jason what was the final score in that game which one Kentucky Mississippi State I'm not I'm not sure I'm walking around outside right now okay I can tell you what let me tell you what the final score was in that game it was 24 to three that's what it took for you to get the only points you got in that game was a 12-minute odyssey where you crossed the seven kingdoms of the plane where you went to bordeaux and back where you got together with 10 of your best friends and said we're going on an odyssey boys pack the jerky and the hard bread and get you a knapsack on a fight weekend the venetian has a whole feel feel bowl in its faults and we're going to go get it motherfuckers that's what you did you

journeyed that far for three points and you quested for it and you earned it and then you said now we rest i think we've made our point we that was literally what they did jacky sherrill was there and i know he was like yeah some bitch that's real offense right there football like like I know it's an obvious point to take away from today, but USC Washington and Northwestern Iowa, the same sport. We all knew it was going to be like this. And then both games were even more themselves than they were expected to be. This was, I think this was, I think this was the best Saturday of the year so far.

Like, each time, though, gave me that, holy shit, there's too much happening now feeling, you know? And I don't know if I felt that at any point all season, but I felt it all day today. half the game i feel like so entirely catch up on yeah um it was very hard watching usc in washington at the same time as bama lSU that changed of course with jaden daniels was hit under the chin helmet to helmet and driven into the turf by dallas turner which counted as a roughing but not targeting for reasons that um i don't even need explained i know people are like how is that not targeting and i'm like well because he fucked up that's why because targeting is about what's in your heart.

I love Dallas Turner. I don't think he's a dirty player. That hit sucked. That hit was just, everything about it was real bad. And Jane Daniels was sent back out and then withdrawn and taken back to the injury tent, which was kind of weird.

Before that, he was on pace for a monster game. Like, as good a game as I've ever seen a quarterback play against the saving era defense. Like, just because he was, he's the only real load-bearing skill player there it's like him and then he's got to get the ball to malik neighbors that that's it the offensive line's pretty good or run it himself yeah or run it himself so that's that that that's tough it almost look like you know and i'm don't be a medical professional it almost look like unless you forgot what that was we're just like

oh his jaw work and it back out there and then someone's like wait wait wait wait it's the 2020s. They're like, oh, okay, bring it back, bring it back, bring it back. Yeah, that was, that was ass. Jalen Milrow, though, man. Jalen Milro had like 400 yards offense by himself. He was a monster tonight. Jaila Milro, uh, we'll have to, we'll have to have this confab with the, the Bama Council of Elders, but in the pantheon of beloved quarterbacks, I feel like Jalen Milro is rising with a bullet. He might be above Jake Coker status at this point, rising towards maybe not Blake Sims territory, but passing AJ McCarron for sure.

Yeah, I think so. I mean, the first half of the season, there was definitely that he was carrying that offense, right? Especially once we saw them play without him. At this point, he's just a good quarterback. Like, there were so many moments tonight where it was like, I think four Heisman finalists are playing out. And also J.J. McCarty.

I call it five. but yeah like completely legit looks like he should have been the guy all along which you know they might he also he also missed the most wide open touchdown pass you you could have seen this weekend and missed it so badly that like not usually you see that miss and it's like oh the receiver could just get a finger on it the receiver jumps and the ball basically wasn't even in three with him and there was nobody near him for 15 yards

and it wasn't a deep pass it was just a like 14 yard pass up the sideway yeah you know what that was heat check that was a heat check he doesn't want your handouts Ryan he doesn't want the game to give him freebies no LinkedIn user is asking is Ryan in a well

no Ryan is in the field he's working hard I was I went tail game with the LSU boys today Bowhick's brewery I had a lovely time I do want I think really what

we are not saying about the LSU game is the reason LSU didn't win is because Old Miss did and I think they just can't bear see Old Miss possibly get

an SEC West title and so they weren't going to contribute to that by beating Alabama I think that's fair and smart Again, this goes with the only positive stereotypical role that we have Brian Kelly in, which is as the sniveling Craven wrestling manager. That's really the only positive role we could put Brian Kelly in this, you know. Well, my client here, he doesn't want to see the evil dastardly old miss get to the West.

So yeah, we threw the match. So yeah, we hit someone with a chair. Did it help us? No. No. Did it ruin the bastard Rick Flares Day? Yes. And that's why we did it.

Holly, did you get to watch the matchup of disappointing adult boys that was better known as Texas A&M Ole Miss? Yes. And can I tell you? I don't want this to sound romantic. This is more like I would give you a kid me if you needed one. I have new feelings about Jackson Dart at this time. Okay. Please go on. This has nothing to do with the game. This has everything to do with what happened after the game when he was asked how he dealt with Texas A&M's trash talk during the week, which apparently was voluminous.

And he said something to the effect of, yeah, I really thought they would be getting enough attention for the games they were losing. I will buy a jersey for, like, I want to contribute. directly to his NIL experience and only to his NIL experience. I just want to cut him a check. Can I create an NIL concern strictly for Jackson DART? Jackson DART. I think it's cool that A&M doesn't know that they're bad.

Like I, he's, listen, he's, he's an Ole Miss quarterback with good hair. So I was already like, yeah, you're one of the, the players I like to watch out there. But now I'm like, hey, man, do you need a ride somewhere? Do you, do you, like, want to get your lunch today? I can, I can get you something. Do you like a juicebox? I can door to, I can door dash something for you. Man, I just.

Paulus and I all thing, the dart board. The dart board. If he knows how I can get a crisp $100 bill to Jackson Dart, I just want to give him one. He'll buy something real stupid with it because, my God, that's the most beautiful quote of the year. I get one of the crisp ones from the bank And I'd put it in a little special envelope for him

And said it to him Yeah Anyway the game was pretty stupid too But in a fun way But nothing Oh God I saw stars When I saw that quote

Holly there's another great Jackson Dart related quote from the game Lane Kiffin said that On the last scoring drive When they put the game winner in Jackson Dart came back to the sidelines and said, we scored too fast, and Lane Kiffin's response was,

can you be positive, please? Wait, you have to say, like, try to imagine, try to hear that in Lane's voice. Can you be positive, I can't, I'm not sure I can form it. That's like if, if Lane Kiffin's Twitter persona was actually Lane. Yeah.

Can you be positive, please? Yeah, be positive, please. And halftime Colorado has five first downs, by the way, five. Good. So the shuffle paid dividend. Yeah, let's just keep, let's keep educating Sean Lewis and how, and how this is all supposed to go. Yeah, Pat Schumer's like, that's the NFL edge I bring. Okay, we saw this this morning and this is really mean, but it's true.

I didn't know Pat Schumer was alive. That's so bad. Like, not coaching. Like, no, but that's how far removed I thought he was from the game. I thought that he had, I really truly thought that he had passed on. That's so bad if you not only are like. That's how a secret of a web. Like, I'm not saying this as a joke.

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plus special financing for a limited time. Only at a sleep number store or sleep number.com. Sleep number, official sleep and wellness partner of the NFL. C store for details. When you don't even know if it's like, oh, he's still in the league, you're like, no, no, no, we mean the life league. We mean above ground. Wait, he's 58?

Pat Schumer is five years older than Matt Damon. Yeah. And about as good at calling plays. Yeah. I want to go back, way back, travel way back in time to noon and discuss Texas, Kansas State. This is where I'm going to have a Stephen Godfrey moment here, where I'm going to call out people in this industry. People. in this industry.

Michigan hypocrisy. Wait, wait, can I be Richard? Yes. Yes. Okay. Because when the rubber reeds the road, I think you guys need to know that a skin cat gathers no moss.

That's good. So, K-State. K-State roared back into this game. They were stank-ass and down 27-7. And then roared back into this game. game to tie it 30.30 and go into overtime. Okay. Now, when they got to overtime at the end of the first overtime, what did they decide to do? Needing a field goal. Instead, Chris Kleinman decided to go for it. They were first in goal at the Texas six. And they go run for two yards,

incomplete pass and then on third and goal they go incomplete pass this is another instance today of openly guffawing announcers yeah they decided to win it and I don't know you can

you can question the play calling that's fine I personally on the road especially nobody wants more overtime and Will Howard was playing his ass off put it in his hands to win the game play call didn't work it was definitely one of those things where you go

well that was a dumb play call and I'm like well if it had worked it wouldn't have been a dumb play call but like I saw like Can I push back on this lightly? Please. I understand the logic of when you are the underdog and you're on the road extending the game does not

mathematically work to your advantage but when you are Kansas State and it is Texas a team that historically you have given so many fucking fits to I think part of you has to realize Texas doesn't want this game to keep going, even though they are on paper better. And there is a like emotional devastation making this take as long as fucking possible. Like Texas should be at home and have the talent advantage and they should be confident.

But Texas is going to be like, are you kidding me? We have to go into double overtime with these fuckers. and I think that was ignored. Somebody, by the way, somebody also said somebody, I believe it was possible cabbage in the comment section. I just wanted to say that name out loud, said that they had the ball on the four and they gained zero yards on four plays. Have you seen the middle of Texas' defensive line? Texas's defensive line is easily 700 pounds of man just at the tackles alone. Sweat is, sweat was a monster today, an absolute beast.

And, yeah, they could have, like, Kansas State had a lot of other things that got them to this point. They had some serious kicking foibles. But overall, they didn't gain yardage on that because Texas's defensive line was better. That's why those guys are as rare as hen's teeth. They're fucking huge. Now who's Richard? Rare as hen's teeth. I did it.

Richard and I both use some quality old man analogies. Thank you, Godfrey. Thank you. No, he has picked it up so much this season, and I can only assume it's on purpose, but it's like, he's starting to outpace you in like the old-timey, old-timey phrasing this bit. And it's such a joy to watch. So, yeah. When I see that happen, I know that people in that, because you want the underdog to win, and mentally you're sitting there going, well, there's a perfect play to be called. In this industry. Right. In this industry. there's a perfect play to be called because you're paid to call perfect plays and my answer is big monster big monster on defensive line yeah this only works because god if godfrey ever listens to this show we're in trouble yeah why what's he gonna do be tall at us no that's fair yeah they're not listening to make us make us watch falcons game oh that's mean listen man he's like if there's no hope there because he took his kid to a falcons game and his kid got hit in the face with a ball The franchise is telling you to leave.

The rescue of said child. That's true. That's true. But you know what you should have said? Thank you, Cordero, Patterson. That was very sweet. I'm leaving and never watching a game again. I have gotten the message. Also, he didn't do either of the things that I would have done,

which is either whip out a phone and start filming everything inside and just see what the Titan staff does. Or instruct the child to fall on the ground and flop like a chicken. They could have owned that place. See, my kids just do that unprompted. You can't teach it. That's just talent. Normally I don't want to talk about this game,

and I don't think we necessarily do me to, but the fact that Florida wore the stupidest fucking uniform as possible for a noon game that they lost in overtime to Arkansas at home. I'm only putting this comment up here because it's really funny and incorrect. What does it say? Doesn't Godfrey willingly podcast? with Danny Cannell. Oh, I thought that was Daffy Cannell.

Okay. Huh. That's a fun thing to ponder. Let's speak that into the universe. You can actually just say that he does. Yeah, that's him. That's right. Say that you really enjoyed their show and tag both of them.

Daffy Caspell. Do not tag me. Tag both of them. Are we going to Mandela affect this? Like, you know that podcast he does with Danny Canell, right? Yeah. Yeah, it's all. It's very pro apartheid.

yeah somebody asked how florida did ass their fucking ass it's just absolute trash ass shit just absolute fucking garbage that's how they did i wish i would quit devaluing our schedule we decline we will continue to do we will continue to devalue your schedule fucking rude we devalued your schedule by beating you that was the problem no yes that listen there was no there was no world where losing to 2023, Florida was going to be a good loss. Nope.

Petitioned via Big Ten Guy to refer to Danny Connell from here on out as Danky Kang. Who ordered? Yes. Motion passes

without a vote. Donkey Kongo. Is that a term? Let's be real. He's more than Dixie Kong. Okay. I'm going to say, is he Diddy Kongo?

I don't know. Franky Kongo. He doesn't have the groggy Kong. I play the unlicensed Australian version of Donkey Kong. Donkey Kang. It's wildly inappropriate for children, but I love it. Every time he says something from now until forever. Okay, Donkey King.

Yeah, Florida was absolutely terrible, had an absolutely terrible loss tonight. There was another Sunshine State team who hasn't had success in a very long time and is struggling badly to regain, lost lorias as well that would be miami uh again mario cristobal tactical genius avoiding the conflict and pressure of a late game management situation by simply losing late in the game and avoiding it all together uh tyler van dyke is is broken right now uh he had three picks no t d's

he was struggling all night i think he's playing hurt so i would be a little more gentle on him than uh you might otherwise because I don't know why he's still in there. That's a management issue. That's not a Tyler Van Dyke issue. Georgia Tech One, which throws off our wind loss pattern, I believe, right? This may be because we may have accidentally powered Georgia Tech up by dining at a Georgia Tech restaurant with Kirchner on Thursday night. Oh, you've altered the timeline.

We have. That's all right. We also got the most amazing piece of Georgia Tech adjacent gossip I've ever heard that we can't report. Sorry. If we get permission for it, no whole story. Missouri and Georgia played a football game. They did, and it was a little more interesting than I thought it had any right to be.

Is that a good way of describing this game? Sure. Yes, for probably 80%. Yeah, you know, and I thought, like, that's a pretty good. result for for missouri that they got an 80% of an interesting game i am going to say kind things about the georgia bulldogs that have nothing to do with their overall national prestige and instead i want to focus on the singular greatness of nazir stackhouse's interception return nazir stackhouse is not a small man he does not play on offense either nazir stackhouse is a defensive

alignment he is stone mountain george's finest six three three hundred and twenty pounds and brady cook in a moment of absolute insanity decided that he was going to throw the ball over nazir stackhouse he could not do that because nazir sackhouse is very tall and athletic stackhouse caught the ball and when he caught it he started to run with it and when asked about it postgame said this. You got to give me some type of credit. My chest started to stick out. My stomach started to stick out. It's hard to pick

up your knees when you got all that meat right there. This is the most Georgia shit ever. I love you, dude. This would have been a Pysman play in a Pysman eligible year. Nazir Stackhouse, the grandeur and the beauty of football

in one single image and person. Shouts out to you. That was awesome. Okay. Got all that new right there. Sam Houston State finally won a game. And I'm sorry that Jason's not here to talk about it from the learned Kennesaw State perspective. But honestly, just thank God. The losses that that team has had to endure trying to just get one win in their first FBS season.

Oh, God. While they have to watch Jacksonville State, who gave South Carolina a hell of a game today. have a really good season while they have to watch jm u continue to go undefeated in year two like it's hard to be samu's this year i am truly glad the bear cats could like in this particular box checked yeah i was i also want to uh i want to congratulate rutgers today i know you lost and you lost to a much better team should have lost that game you made it real interesting A real fun shit happened along the way. Yeah.

Like superb game plan. And on top of that, by the way, we saw the fumble rusky in the wild, executed flawlessly. All right. A beautiful fumble rusky executed by Rutgers special teams in this. 3516 was the final. The game was, I believe, much closer than that for most of the game.

So shouts out to Rutgers. Not only are you already bowl L. You managed to put three quarters. This is, again, kind of a Missouri result. You got 80% of a good football game. And that's way more than could be expected against Ohio State. I think this one was more 60%. Yeah, that's fine.

Yeah. That's a harsh audit, sir. Listen, with the curve, this will get you passing grade. 100%. This was also, I know that Ohio State fans will go back and forth about whether this was good or bad. Travion Henderson had 128 yards in this game. If he's doing well, your offense and you still have

Marvin Harrison, you're still more than functional on offense. So I would take some heart in that, especially because Rutgers is a pretty good defense. That's a pretty good defense, pretty good team. Oh, like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. How have we got, however far

we are into this episode, out talking about the hero of the Protestant faith, Davo Swinney, why did something happen listen i am wrong almost all this time i did say that everybody was going to get super excited for notre dame to go ahead and deliver the death blow to this clumson season and notre dame is going to poop their pants and buddy these pants smell terrible yeah that's because that's because phil mafa kicked the shit out of out of you

that's right Phil Mofa is bad, dude. He is an awesome running back. He had 186 yards and two TDs, which is good because K. Kovnik never really kind of got it going. He had a pretty midday overall. Sam Hartman, unfortunately, for the Irish, decided to see mid as a starting point and dive down from there.

He had an extremely handsome 13-for-30-day, and a stunning, strong-jawed and striking zero TD and two I&T total against that. So if you want to know what happened to him, he's so beautiful that the Clemson defense saw him and they were like, we love you too. Come here.

Hug us. Kiss us. Is Sam of Hartman moving from Lumberjack love interest that Big City one lawyer falls for in the Christmas, Hallmark Christmas movie,

to Big City handsome financier that the lawyer lady leaves in the Christmas movie because she falls in love with somebody nicer and better. That was his role today, yeah, because that guy loses. Davo was, Davo was fiery after this. I mean, he might, he might buy Tyler from Spartanburg's

house, Justin Vernontown. I'm just grateful that nobody ever told Davo that players are getting paid now, because otherwise he might have quit before he got to experience this. Also, Dabo said if Clemson was a stock, you better buy all that you can find right now, which

to me says that this is a pump and dump scam, and Clemson is going to immediately lose their next game. If there is one person, I would love to hear explain how securities work. It's definitely Davo. Oh, my God, yes. Listen, if Debo Sweeney calls me with a securities-based pitch, my next call is to the FBI.

No, no. Your next call is to Phil Mickelson, say, Phil? My next call is to Paul Johnson. I'll be like, hey, Paul, you've got some of that gold that you've been hoarding? You know it, brother. If you had to make either Debo or Phil Mckelson your financial planner, who would you Oh, Phil. Phil, I'm here for a good time, not a long time.

Because I know we're going to be up at one point. Oh, brother, we're going to be up. The key to having Phil Mickelson is your financial advisor is getting off at the top and not riding that all the way back down. Also, I converted your 401k to cocaine. Isn't that awesome? For a minute, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. So Clemson, that's cool. You got to, listen, you have to play. We might be off on the Georgia Tech theory, by the way. We say this as, again, the predominant, most important and foremost ACC podcast in the world. Georgia Tech was supposed to be bad because this was an odd way. Don't take that away from Danny Connell and Stephen Godfrey. Oh, I'm sorry. Excuse me, his name is Jackie Tang. I'm sorry, D.K. and S. God. Tuesdays, 1.4.5. The fart. The fart. Live from Captain Scabby's Muscle Shack.

Come by. We're here from 3 to 6. Nobody's here. Nobody's coming. St. Pete's most raw sports show. Yeah. Maybe we'll get some of those jalapeno poppers. My cardiologist said I couldn't do it, but I creeped death. The hardest muscle, but I can't make it stronger. Georgia Tech is supposed to be bad this week, Ryan, because it's odd week, Georgia Tech.

I know. No. They beat Virginia 4517. Beat Virginia. Yeah. Sorry. No, no, I'm here for it. All right.

So now, again, because I'm. in the car so the ACC championship if it were held today would be Florida State rule correct that is correct Florida State by the way I am aware of how long your game with Pitt was zero zero we don't have to talk about it but like we know like I'm doing that thing that where your parents know you did something but they also know that you feel bad about it so we're not going to have a confrontation over it but don't think that that means we don't know we fucking know yeah but you know what this was this is this was fighting a weird guy pits the weird guy right you're like you grip up with him in the octagon you're like he's so

oily oh god i can't not this pit this pit sucks this pit is flat out bad yeah they're bad but they're still oily weird guy it doesn't matter sometimes that's off-putting destroyed oily, weird guy. Is it bad but oily or bad and oily? Bad and oily. Bad and oily. Yeah.

Okay. So, and then. And he's crying and he's saying weird stuff when you're all hooked up with them. It's bad. You don't, yeah, it's just off-putter. And I truly don't know the answer to this. What does the Big 12 race look like right now?

the big let's go let's go to the big 12 because the big 12 i'm pretty sure okay so texas is in the driver's seat there at eight and one five and one in conference time for them at five and one in conference are the oklahoma state cowboys perpetual title holders by the way forever belt holders of the bedlam trophy and i want to point out of out right behind them at four and two. And with the win over the four and two Oklahoma Sooners, the 21st ranked Kansas Jayhawks. That is correct. Kansas Jayhawks lurking there, fresh off of a 28, 21 win over Iowa State. Just a few short years after being winless and total ass. That's, we really do every week just need to say like a little moment of

gratitude for holy shit Kansas is still good yeah I think it was our attention that did it I agree and by the way still good on their backup QB because Jalen Daniels did not play Bean got the start we've noticed the warmth of our love

like the sun that's correct for like the fifth or sixth game this is uh being playing right yes yeah okay but yeah 28 21 bean was

Bain was pretty good to it into an 87 yards one TD getting it done in the absence of the charismatic and extremely talented Jalen Daniels lost to injury for a bit anything else that I am missing from notable games since this was

such a smorgas board we did earlier today recommend... You really did not talk about A&M enough Oh and because people will be listening to this later Jason ran out of blood again. That's why you haven't heard him in a little while.

You stopped putting blood in the computer and he disappeared again. And it's your fault. It's your fault. Hope you're happy. Pour blood into the computer for Jason. It is after dark in the Pac-12, which means UCLA is currently losing to Arizona. Oregon State is currently beating Colorado. Well, that's normal.

And Stanford is currently beating Washington State. Cincinnati lost again. Saw that. dude did you see scott satterfield's postgame statement it was no i see i see i did not how how how how how could that be spicy well oh okay no no no no i don't i didn't see it i'm asking it back i guess jesus no like yeah what no please please expand i want to know more yeah oh god hang on i'll fucking read it Okay, here was his opening statement. Okay. Congrats to Central Florida for getting that win, but I think it points to a very undisciplined football team,

which pisses me off. That's the first thing he said. Wow. Cool. I wonder whose fault that is. Whoever wants to show up in that locker room tomorrow, we're going to continue to work on that. And that's what I just told him in the locker room.

It's just unacceptable. It is very funny that they keep out. gaining teams by over 100 yards and losing. I agree that that is outrageous. But I think Coach Satterfield and I have different definitions of outrageous here. How does every single team I've ever seen this dude put out there is the most miserable group of people. Oh, sorry, the statement went on for some time. I appreciate, I'm skipping down now because there's a lot of it. But I appreciate everyone that shows up out there that have to look at that crap. It pisses me off. again if only we can find the person responsible for this team alas we will never know

i could do without him uh throwing his players under the bus and get to the part where he starts openly ogling other jobs that's the fun part this isn't fun at all sure sure maybe he's just going to threaten to quit i'll go back to louisville that's what i'll do will you that's i can ride back in like napoleon welcome okay it's my fault because I skipped

straight to the end of the game but we really did not spend enough time on A&M we can that's for damn I can happily go back

to that Max Johnson I do want to say a kind of word about Max Johnson he's real good to get the shit beat out of him

he did I feel I don't want to say that now that I've seen you know he didn't have he didn't have a Obama defender trucking

him under the chin or anything, but he got knocked around a lot. He did, and he... I was going to say, one thing I really appreciate about pretty much every A&M game, there's always a moment, and there's usually multiple moments, where you can look at Jimbo

talking, usually to match the concerts, another player entirely, where it's like, if you just turn the sound off, they're making all the same motions of a family fighting on vacation, having a terrible time. The energy is exactly that of like, well, you said, you said they didn't take reservations, Daryl.

And so I didn't make them. And now we have nowhere to fucking eat. I didn't want to go to the Sasquatch Museum. And that's just the entirety of the A&M football experience under Jimbo Fisher is this family that hates being on this cruise that none of them wanted to book in the first place. Especially them staring over those weird little glasses. anyways and football also happens uh yeah by the way a and m they are oh and four against ranked teams and uh also they're on a road losing streak of nine straight good god like i i have to say as a team with the lengthy road losing streak myself uh that sucks it's bad it's worse than florida's that's

real bad florida won at south carline that's fine yeah that's season over got the chicken time to go happened after that in any way. South Carolina beating Jacksonville State today in a game that at least the sickos were calling the cockadoodle duel. Wow. It's pretty pretty south-sounding. It's great work. Also, no shame in that

because if you've watched South Carolina, you were like, that's a win! Take it! That's a win, baby! I really, I watch games like that, and I'm like, and to be clear, you thought the way to make your existence better was to invite Texas and Oklahoma to your party. Okay. That's cool. You know what? We like this basement. We'll dig a little deeper. It's cool. It's cool down here in the summer months. Kids at school are bullying me. I think we should invite a gorilla. It'll live in my basement. I'll fight it every night. And that's how I will become stronger

or a waste away due to sickness and injury. What if the gorilla kills you? What do you mean? Gorilla will only make strong. Gorilla will not kill me. South Carolina is basically choosing the squat every day for a squat every day for three months planned. I will get infinitely stronger on an infinite growth curve if I squat 405 for reps every day. That's how I will become.

invincible. Unrelated. I have to stand up to poop. Yeah. I have anxiety attacks when I see stares, even short flights of them. I can no longer, the wind hurts my kneecaps. That's South Carolina. More weight, the most Giles Corey ass program in the world. I kind of love for that usually south carolina is on the other end of the crucible scenario yeah yeah this was one more thing on texas n mrs if you want to watch a team that makes it easy on the quarterback to succeed you watch old miss and if you want to watch a team that makes it as hard as possible for the quarterback to succeed and even if they try as valiantly as max johnson does and and did and performs as well still like now fuck you that's the plan congratulations your your texas an oh i i don't remember

if it was new mex i think it was new mexico but it might have been new mexico state one of them put up on their video board today you know how like during the game they'll be like uh welcome to this you know local charitable group or this whoever paid to have their name put up here fucking New Mexico put up Welcome Connor Stallions Pertheses Probably

I love it Well well done I just love that we have We have gotten to the point In this particular stupid story Where New Mexico gets to dunk on Michigan What a rare treat That we should really stavor and appreciate

Yeah Another rare treat by the way was Penn State today actually trying to throw the ball downfield and oh look they palindromed maryland 51 15 that's no that's november maryland definitely not maryland maryland should see if they can trick penn state to playing this game in july oh they'll lose by listen pennstead will lose by 70 Maryland Maryland is like bird man or like uh birdman right like the sun powers you'd see where this is going right yes yes yes harvey bird then oh that okay that's not where i thought you're going no did you think you did you think he meant the uh the uh the sure did

get got you yep please i'm not bringing in a retu into this we're gonna start spurs yeah it's just swear to god um but yeah that's congratulations to Penn State for deciding to try against Maryland and not Ohio State, right? Real bravery starts with beating Maryland by 46 points. Sorry, 36 points. Yeah, man. Again, didn't lose Bedlam. One more, one more little note. Utah still has nobody.

Like they have, it's one of those, everybody is injured situations, and they beat Arizona State 55 to 3 today. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How? Arizona State can only do so much in the first year. Yeah, it's been taking a lot out of Arizona State. Yeah. Jacob Conover has one of the most extraordinary QB lines I've ever seen. Go with me on this journey, hold my hand.

together we will walk into this dark and back out of it in a single sentence. Jacob Conover went 5-422 for 41 yards and one interception. He had a QBR of 8.8 and he averaged 1.9 yards of completion.

Oh, boy. And they threw 22 passes? Uh-huh. Well, no, he threw 22 few passes. It's been a metaphor. But you remember that

perfectly preserved dead bird on the sidewalk? Uh-huh. Like, you can't see anything wrong with it at all,

but it's dead. Yeah, but what if there were 22 of them? Colorado is still playing, yeah. They only sacked him four times,

which to me says that the defense simply got bored and stood back there in morbid curiosity. Like, let's see where he's going with this.

We have a weird score emerging in Colorado, Oregon State. If I gave each of you 10 guesses, you would not guess the current score of Colorado, Oregon State, where it is now Beavers 20, Buffs

5. Oh, we got a Cinco. Okay. Okay. That's a rugby score. Okay. We have a fiver. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Shudur, by the way,

Shardar Sanders is up to 66 yards passing. I'm going to laugh real hard if you made this big fancy change at play caller only to get outscored by Iowa this weekend I think that's where we're headed Ryan so go ahead see be the case go go ahead and just bookmark that thought we'll come back to it when we record on Tuesday for the midweek show okay I think that's definitely happening here do you do you want to do that thing where you yell Twitch names like a deranged grandpa or are we done uh no

No, I decline. Okay. Instead, I will murmur them and go, hey, everyone. Thanks, too. I will shout out everyone, including our LinkedIn commenters like Andrew Roddy coming in under his government name. Congratulations. John Crutcher, Zekebud, Jesus, Dave's, Tony Two Claws! Come on, it was worth it for the name Tony Two Clause.

That's incredible. Yeah, I actually have to agree there. Yep. Yes. And Podcat says, good night, Swole, Nanny. Hey, thanks. Thank you for joining this. That is a thing that happened today.

Good night, Mush. Mac Brown. A full cast listener came up to me at the DVA tailgate and said, hey, you're a lot more ripped than I thought you would be. That's, um, I guess I should confess at this point that that's my fault. I don't. I told people, I told people in the Channel 6 chat not to fuck with you because you were more muscular than they might have met. Oh, okay.

That might explain it. Oh, no. Oh, no, people are coming up to me in public and telling me how swole I am. No, no, help me escape this hell. I just want to emphasize something. I don't have physical forms at all. What? We live in the ether, which is why.

We're just, we're, yeah. If you want to feed our souls, pour blood into the computer. Put blood in the computer so that our bodies can regenerate. Yes. I'm a figment. That's right. All right. It's time.

It's time to have to the show. Thanks, y'all. Good night. Night, everybody.