Shutdown Fullcast - Shutdown Fullcast 3.24.0

Episode Date: October 15, 2015

The Fullcast lives! A day late, sure, but still up despite travel and meetings and other tedious adult necessities. We sound really good via using actual studio mikes in NYC! And keep timers because we were working on a tight turnaround! Expect neither to happen ever again! Topics: --AAAAHHHHHHHHH SPURRIER COME BACK --AAAAAAAAAAHHH SARK YOU okay don't come back for a while until you figure some shit out --AAAAAAAHHHHHH WHYYYYYY WILL GRIER WHYYYYYY --AAAAAAAHHHHHH okay maybe that's enough AAH-ing this week is real good and gonna BE real good and we talk about that for a bit Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to the shutdown fullcast. We have to move quickly this week. We are on the road. We are in New York City. I'm here live with Ryan Nanny. Say hi, Ryan. I'm even more handsome in person than I am on the radio. Devastating.

And joining us from his usual spot in Kennesite, Georgia, is Jason Kirk. Say hello. Hey, what's up? We have a lot to discuss. So we're actually going to put things on a timer because we have very little time and everything happened this week. First up, we have to discuss Steve Spurrier. Ryan and I are very emotional about this,

so I want to start with Jason talking about Eo ball coach. I have no emotions about this whatsoever. It's merely a coaching transaction for me. Just replace his name at the top of the spreadsheet, the South Carolina spreadsheet, put in a new one. That's it. Bastard. I'm just kidding.

I'm just kidding. Of course, I'm emotional as well. You cold and unfailing bastard. There's obviously less personal stake in it as there is for you two gentlemen, as you are both massive Duke Blue Devil fans. I would say I would say I'm mostly a Buccaneers fan, and that's why I have a Spurrier connection, clearly. As USFL historians, you both have a long, long tie to the man.

The Tampa Bay Bandits were an influential team. They were kind of like the Velvet Underground of football teams. Only seven people saw them, but they all started football teams after they saw the Tampa Bay Bandits. This does give us an opportunity, though, to possibly create the crossover I've always wanted to with, I don't know if you guys know this. There's a wine expert, a British and wine expert named Steven Spurrier. Played by Alan Rickman in a film.

In Bottleshock, I think. Yes, bottle shock. Yeah. So, like, before you could have said, well, ostensibly, Steve Spurier is busy coaching. You can't say that now. Let's get these two together. Let's put them on a little road trip. That's true.

Through wine country? Mm-hmm. Through French wine country. Oh, man. This is like the trip. But like, three. Hey, man. How you call Versailles Palace and you ain't even got a nine hole course?

Is this a Moravitra? It's a delicious vantage. You American heel. I do think this is, there was one weird argument that people made immediately, like almost before he resigned, like so quickly, which is, why is no one saying that he's quitting on a tank? in the middle. Why doesn't anyone of the media say that? And the honest answer is, because we like him. Well, it's that. And also, he'll tell you. Like, he made no pretense of like, yeah, I'm just, I don't think, I don't see a reason to stick around. Like, I don't think he, I don't think he would care if

you said, you quit on this team. He's like, yeah, I know, I told you. Were you not at the press conference, son? There's also the other factor of, you know, if, Everyone is saying why isn't anyone saying he's quitting. That counts as everyone saying he's quitting. He quit. Also, it's kind of naive. We all agree on that. Yeah, I think it's naive too, because that's not how the college football calendar works now.

Realistically, firing seasons now. It's not at the end of the season. People don't wait anymore. Spurter just auto-fired. He may be the first coach in the history of the sport to fire himself. It's respectable, really. No, and that's not true. I mean, it's a weird move, but that's how he was going to go.

I mean, I don't think any, like, when you hire a coach. Right. And this leads into our next topic somewhat. Oh, we still got two minutes on this one. Oh, yeah, no, we're going to be fine. Okay. We don't have two minutes to fill on. We'll be fine.

But you don't expect surprises, right? You sort of know what you're getting, right? And that's always been the deal with Spurrier. Spurrier's always been the guy who he could go at any second. That was dating back to Duke and Florida. Foley himself. This is a quote from an 1997 article, right? It said, we're going to give them a raise because we know we're competing with the NFL.

We know we could go at any point. This happened, by the way, to the point where the alligator, when I was there, had in the boxes with the papers. Steve Spurrier accepts Tampa Bay Buccaneer's job. It was in in the morning. This was pre-internet, by the way. So you picked it up and immediately shot your pants. Yeah, because there was nothing to tell you it was wrong. Right.

And it was completely wrong. Thousands of copies. Let's, before we move on to the next topic, Steve Spurrier made a point of saying that he was resigning, not retiring. Let's talk about non-college football options for Steve Spurrier. My favorite, I think, NBA head coach. I think he doesn't have to recruit if he's a head coach of, you know, let's say the Lakers. He can just sort of, you know, put on a tie.

He can throw the visor. That's going to be fun, especially indoors. Don't know why you're wearing the visor in the first. play Steve. That would be my vote. He might go get to coach Louisville. That could happen. And maybe the college basketball team, especially.

Don't you want to see Caliperi and Spurrier going at it? Barbin? I bet they just get caught up in it and just be like, kiss. We can't keep up with payroll. Come up here and kiss me, Steve. And they do. And it's beautiful. Yeah.

I think basketball coach is a good alternative. I think that maybe he'd be one of those guys, you know, the course marshal on a golf course goes around, tells people what and what not to do. Spurrier just politely might. You're going to clean up that divot? Hey man, you're playing too dang slow. Messing up this course like that. Playing slower than a Will Must champ team.

All right, that was our five minutes. That's good. Jason, what's top of number? That's it. No one will ever talk about Steve Spurrier ever again. Good. Jason, you want to give us our second topic. Which one we're doing next? Oh, Steve Sarkeesian. It's fired at USC. USC fires Steve Sarkeesian.

Yeah. He was a coach. Then he was a coach with an interim coach, and now he's not the coach anymore. The most USC thing about this is that Steve Sarkesian was not doing well at USC from a job performance perspective, given that they lost. to a pretty mediocre Washington team at home. At home. At home. I would argue that he comes out of this looking third worst. Ahead of him, and we can decide which order they come in. Pat Hayden, the AD, looks real bad right now.

Maybe ahead of him, though, the search firm that USC paid. How much, Spencer? About a million? A million. A million dollars. One million dollars. A million dollars to tell you, yes, you should hire the man that you already want to hire.

It's the most expensive best friend you could possibly have. It's the toy. And two funny things about that is you should hire the guy who is exactly like the guy you just fired except with slightly more head coaching experience. And also, what were you searching if you did not know that these things about Steve Sarkesian? Because like everyone knew these things. Like I am on the other side.

of the country from Washington and I knew full well these things about Steve Sarkesian that there are these things he struggles with that could become a problem under a larger spotlight and somehow this search firm found nothing

you paid them a million dollars okay so informal poll three of us Jason you knew right that he was at least a person who was mentioned as being like a potentially problem drinker right right you'd heard

enough anecdotally from people that you trust to know. Sure. Yeah. Ryan? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, like, outside of this little think tank, right? Like, outside of our pool. And like, to be clear, we're not talking about like three days ago. We're talking about like last year and beyond.

Talking about like this was talking about like three years ago. If USC did not know that, that's incomprehensible. Yeah. And I will third that, that we have a 100% knowledge rate on this that everyone knew that he was a kind of guy who at the very least hit it so hard that other people in the business in the community who also drank and went out with him were like, whoa, and acknowledge that, yeah, he's a degree above everyone else. And for USC to pay someone a million dollars and say that that was not part of it, I do not comprehend. Yeah, it's, the whole ending of the of the, of the Sarkesian era also

smacks of like, what was the plan here? Because you went from within 24 hours, Steve Sarkesian's on indefinite leave to Steve Sarkesian is fired. And oh, by the way, he found out because friends of his texted and emailed him their condolences. Like, I don't, I don't understand how ADs can't do real basic, like, if you fired someone at a Burger King, you could, you would do a better job of it than this, right? You would actually tell them. You would, you would, call them. You would wait till you saw them in person. Wait till they work. We are also talking about Pat Hayden, who is on the playoff committee, who therefore is one of the Council of Elders in this sport, and who last year during a game actually charged down from whichever

throne he sits on at the Coliseum during games to argue with a ref during a game. This is a person in charge of this sport. This is one of the highest supreme rulers of this sport. All right, well, let's consider, though, who on that playoff committee that's not currently employed by a school has had coaching experience and might be tapped? Tye willing. It's like you're reading my goddamn mind. Ty. Barry Alvarez. Okay, sure, sure.

Hey, you know what? Who will no longer fill in just at Wisconsin. I was going to say. He can now fill in at any coach with a tie to the committee. Bobby Johnson. Bobby Johnson. O.G. Bobby Johnson.

Condoleezza of Rice Sure, absolutely. With Barry Alvers, you hire both your own coach and your own interim coach. Oh, my God. Because the most thing, like, spur your... I think the one you hire is the newspaper guy who had a Twitter that was just porn links

and it's deleted now, but it was totally up for like three years. And nobody's ever heard of the guy, but he's got a great reputation. I hired that guy coach... I hired a search for a look into his Twitter history and I didn't find anything. it's perfect paid him a million dollars okay 10 seconds left on this topic

Spencer who's next at USC just name give me name go Kyle Shanahan okay perfect three two and we're done good next topic next topic we did actually have we did we had another thing before all of this happened yeah before Sparger before Sarkisian we had a firing in Maryland oh yeah I don't know if we're gonna make it fun I don't know if we're gonna make it minutes on this. I think we can. You think? Okay. Man, it's going to be a sad five minutes, but let's go.

Okay. Randy Edsel is done. Done. Toast. We can read the Wikipedia page for the state of Maryland if need be. You know, if you look at, if you look at Randy Edsel's record, by the way, like, it's really amazing that he didn't fired sooner. It really is. It has to be only the kind of like institutional inertia that you can only get at a place like Maryland that doesn't even know what their expectations are football-wise. Like, really, what are they?

My favorite fact about Maryland football when you say, well, they've had success in the past. I'm like, they had a coach die of Rocky Mountain spotted fever. That's how cursed they are. Okay, admittedly, that was quite a while ago. But when you look at him, he at Maryland just had just a miserable, miserable time. Multiple eight and nine win seasons at Connecticut, nothing that's going to blow anyone's doors off unless you can sit at the context. But at Maryland, like seven and six, that's the peak. That was the peak.

And I like that people tried to argue, oh, well, jump into the Big Ten just made this an impossible. I mean, dude went two in ten and four and eight, his first two years at Maryland in the ACC, with a team that had just gone nine and four under Ralph Frigion. Yeah. I mean, the Frigian firing to replace with Randy Edsel now feels like a, you know, premonition of Fire Bo Polini hire Mike Riley.

It has a lot of the same elements where you're just sort of like yeah, you know, he's an institution but he just can't get us where we need to be. We need to find the guy who will take us to Mount Championship and now you are lying dead a hundred feet short of base camp

wondering what the fuck went wrong. That's called punting on base camp. It's sort of the thing we're like we we need a coach who's about as good we just need less less coach like we just need less of a person here we need we need we need all the all the rough edges and all that stuff we just don't want any of that and you hear andy edsel cool randy is actually just a human corpse full of grass clipping so that made sense from that perspective surprisingly animated yeah wore a hoodie really well which i think is it easy 20% of the entire role university of maryland oh especially if you're

going to the big ten you definitely need to have that hoodie game tight i think that's why they entered they got that i also feel that he was really good at appearing extremely tall like i'm told he's only about six three or so no no no he looked like nine feet tall on the sidelines well he looks he looks like he looks like a fucking tree yeah he does have an ent thing going on or like he could transform into a a condor or something at any moment well there is also a clip i think it was last year of the year before when there's a ball flying off the field, which imagine that happening during a Maryland game. And he skies. He just leaps up and extends his four foot arms up to grab the ball. And man, I swear, if something's stuck in a tree near your house, Randy Edsel

needs something to do, you go get him to do it. Extendu. And if that something is, you know, valuable, like say a five-star recruit, Randy Edsel will somehow render it half as valuable. No, he's not getting a tree in the first place. It'll fall to the ground. Its knees will not be in good shape. He'll knock it out of the tree and then James Franklin will take it from him. Exactly. And then it'll gain like nine yards against Temple.

Let's talk about the, I don't care about who Maryland hires next because I frankly don't think they have a clue who they're hiring next. No, it will be somebody, but like Dino Babers is probably like that's the like I assume people will make. Don't do this Dino. They'll do the dumbest easiest decision. Not that hiring Dino Babers. is dumb. He's done a really good job at Bowling Green, but what they will do is say, don't you

want that guy who scores a lot of points and who beat us at home? Like, I would put $20 on the table. $20 that they hired Dino Babers simply because they're like, well, that guy came in the neighborhood, man, he beat the hell out of us. That guy beat up my dad. He's my new dad. Yeah. And listen, if winning at Maryland makes you the head coach, you have a lot of head coaches, Maryland. But let's talk before we're done with this topic about the current interim coach at Maryland. Mike Loxley. Remind the listeners what Mike Loxley is best known for, please.

Well, he's best known for a couple of different things. Mike Loxley is known for punching an assistant when he was out of the now. Yeah, right in the face. He'll fight in Mike Loxley. He fights and fights. He punched an assistant in the face. Later became a lawsuit, I believe that was eventually settled. That sounds right.

By the University of New Mexico. His record when he was at the University of Mexico was 2 and 26. He is known as an elite recruiter, which is also good code for I have really creative ways of using Southwest points to get free passes for recruits so they can go home. That's an elite recruiter. That's what Mike Loxley is. He is also probably the most beautiful fruit of the Ronzoa coaching tree. Oh, my God. Why didn't we chop that down already?

It's growing through the sidewalk, making us run bubble screens. And before I sound too bitter and salty about all this, he was on the 2003-2004 Florida staff. Ronson's final. Penultimate staff. Penultimate staff at the University of Florida. Seriously, a really great recruiter who, I don't know, man. He won two games at New Mexico. So I'm here in Ronzuk, Maryland head coach.

Wow. Beautiful. That's all the time we have for that topic. We end on that. That's criminal. Next, Ryan, you're going to intro this topic. It's about our own Daryl and the Mott of the University of Florida. Oh, yeah.

We have to talk about Florida. Florida's formerly starting quarterback, Will Greer, suspended for, have we, have we even figured out how long it is? He's definitely suspended for a calendar year. He may lose, I believe it's 12 years of eligibility. I think they hook you up to that machine from the Princess Bride, and they just suck seven years of eligibility out of you. If you, as he did, tested positive for PEDs.

Yeah, we're not even. That is correct. Each week, each game he misses is like that one planet in Interstellar with. waves it counts as 25 years i believe yeah it'll be some sort of unnecessary or necessary rough in his plot where he comes back at the age of like 35 right if you if you understood the the end of contact you can explain will greer's suspension basically yes i think you got to go primer to to really get uh people who understand this slightly better than he keep explaining it to me and i'm nowhere nowhere close to explaining exactly how much eligibility he has left yeah he's a

looper now. What was the substance he was taking? That has not been confirmed. There was a, uh, one, one steroid that was being floated as, uh, uh, as what he was taking, but then I believe Florida, or Florida sources specifically said, legandrol. Yes, but Florida, later somebody did come out and specifically say it wasn't that. Yeah, it's, uh, it's, uh, it's the one thing that it's designed for when you have cancer and your muscles are falling off that it's the thing that keeps them on. Which, sure, that sounds like a great thing to take when you don't have cancer. I can understand, though, if you played for Will Must Champ, you might think you have football cancer.

The whole team did. You were that close to it. I mean, my God. It's a logical conclusion. But yeah, Florida came out and said, it's not that. We're not going to tell you what it is, but it's not that. It's not that. Keep guessing.

Which I think that means, like, it's like napalm or something. Yeah, if you don't know how these work, by the way, this is an NCAA test. It was not an institutional test. The NCAA can swoop in and do their own testing whenever they like. and I've got Florida drug test You know, they They do It's just a matter of notifying

You have, yeah, it's to make sure That you're taking something Yeah This is Florida, son, what are you clean? So the drug test, we're gonna make sure you're good at him You got a hundred This was an NCAA test

And I was at Mississippi State When the NCAA arrived For a test for Dan Mullen. Coaches do not like this. They despise it when they're daily. And the, The main reason they don't like it, besides the fact that maybe one of your players has made a mistake and you'll be ineligible and they've done their steroids incorrectly and not cleared them, right? Like if they're doing them during the season or during spring.

The other reason they don't like them is because it interrupts their schedule. They have it down to the minute and someone comes in and says, NCAA wants a player to pee in a cup for you. They're like, oh, damn it, damn it. It's, it's not. Can he do it while he watches tape? Yeah. And through the magic of the iPad, he can. Thank you, Steve Jobs.

You saint of a man. The other thing about this case is that it puts Trayon Harris as a starting quarterback at Florida, which I don't think is, I know Gurr's play was really good. He's been really good and accurate in that short to mid-range pass. Traon Harris has a better deep ball. He's got plenty of experience playing. I don't know if it's quite the disaster people play. Plus, if I look at it from a purely defeatist perspective, winning six games.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, we're bowl eligible. That counts. In year one? this also does not change the the secret story that I think is behind Florida Florida and I said this to Bill Connolly on selection committee this week Florida is going to lose a game because it misses like three field goals and it probably will be the LSU game is a great great candidate for that's less miles tailored

the other thing coming up by the way oh Florida did have a player arrested today oh boy for for one of the most heinous things you can do that doesn't involve wounding someone, I suppose, or terribly wounding them? Terribly wounding them? Yeah, a really, really horrendous crime. We had a, uh, I'm not laughing. I'm like, it's so bad. That would be DeAndre Porter accused of allegedly firing a gun at his pregnant girlfriend.

No, well, not at. I think Bud, hopefully explain this, just around. Around. Just in the vicinity. really want to get into, do you really want to get into the fine parsing of at or around his pregnant girlfriend? I mean, if you're, if you're, if you're Huntley Johnson, you sure is held to him with him. Huntley Johnson, defense attorney to the stars of Alachua County. Gainesville MVP. Real quick, looking up at the week that will be in terms of college football

viewing. It's, I mean, this is a fairly nice week. No, Jason? Yeah, this is really good. I mean, get two decent Thursday games. We get a couple Friday games. It could be fun. And then everything on Saturday is pretty spread out. Overall, just the sky high view, it's good. If you're going to pick one to Ogilat and two circle on the calendar, what is it going to be for you? I'm going to go Michigan State, Michigan.

I think the Spartans, their trepies act that they've pulled so far this season, it will not fly against Michigan, which is really good. And as a part-time Michigan State fan, obviously, I would like that not to be the case. But, oh, man, I just feel so much impending horror if, like, this game goes the way it looks like it could go. Just the whole, for in East Lansing, it would just feel like, you know, the last five years have just been this fleeting temporary mirage that's totally gone just like that. It'd be very Michigan State. it'd be so so yeah

I'm really looking forward to that I just I guess I'm just worried that'll happen but also really looking Michigan's fun to watch I was gonna say also they are they're a delight to watch which is the weirdest

thing in the world to say that Michigan football is a delight to watch and I would actually like to watch Michigan Michigan State Ryan for you I will go with Baylor West Virginia this is a home game for

Baylor, and this was their only loss of the season last year, so there's a little bit of a revenge element, but from a let's learn something, this is the first, this is the first team resembling a defense that Baylor has faced all year. And Baylor has been fucking awesome on offense. I think they are on pace to break the single season record for yards per play by an offense. West Virginia can play some defense. They did lose one of their key members of the secondary, I believe, a week and a half ago or so. So it may not ultimately be as potent as we would have liked. But I'm excited to watch Baylor as they actually start to, I mean, look,

Baylor doesn't play anybody as sort of a tired trope. I'm excited to see Baylor start to play some somebody's. That's true. Also, one interesting fact about Baylor, they've been over 50 every single game as far. Yep, yep. And this is not September 12. No. We are five games into the season, and they have gone over,

64 times, and they have gone over, they've hit 70 once. In 2000, at 13, probably their best offense yet. They went over 73 times. Who do you think, what do you think is the higher number in the end? The number of touchdowns that the Baylor offense scores per game, or the number of touchdowns that UCF scores in conference play, let's say? Baylor. Okay. Just going to go with that. The game that I am looking at, it's a predictable answer, but I will go ahead and take it.

I am looking at Texas A&M, hosting Alabama. Because this is the game where we find out if A&M is actually good. And by the way, I don't think A&M being good means a win. No, they can hang with, if they hang with them,

that's probably enough to be like, yeah, you got something. Yeah, I mean, let's say they have, year's scoring margin. That's pretty good, right? Can we put it this way? If they score.

That's improvement. If you score and you hold them below 50, that's your benchmark this week, A&M, we're going to hold you to it. If you don't know, they lost 59-0 last year in Tuscaloosa. But that's the advantage of setting, like, you do poorly on one test. Like, you know, if you get two Cs on exams consecutively, well, that's disappointing. But if you improve from an F to a C, hey, buddy, you're doing great. If you get 10 points this year, you are only, what, five, six years away from beating Bama again?

Yeah, this is what we call the Dan Mullen gradient, right? Yay, we scored a touchdown against Bama! These are roll over points, right? I can add them all up and use them at some point. We're going to score 50 on them one year. Then we're just going to wait another decade, store them up. I think that's actually Auburn's plan this year, saving up all the points for Bama for Georgia. It's probably for Georgia. Oh, come on. It's

sure. It'll be, what'll that be? That'll be like a seven and two, something like that, Georgia. And, oh, nope, sorry, sorry. You weren't saving your season, actually. I'm also looking forward to, it's a late game. It'll be brutal. But UCLA at Stanford, yet another interesting Pac-12. I was talking with somebody this week. Everyone in the Pack 12 is going to end up with two losses. Everyone. Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's a mess. it's a mess so pack 12 fans whether it's accurate or not go ahead and ready those deepest conference in America arguments

because you're going to need to and then we're going to get to have the fun argument of oh who like some crappy one-loss ACC team be like well you know it's still a conference championship in Notre Dame don't give them hope like this they don't listen to podcasts until we put them out on phonographs

the victrola saying profane and disrespectful things about the Irish