Shutdown Fullcast - Shutdown Fullcast 40 for 40: The 2017 New Orleans Bowl

Episode Date: December 7, 2017

You can do a fun run in the Superdome like nuclear winter already hit! You can buy clothing and drink out of it! The game might actually be good! Coolio! That's right, it's the first of many bite sized episodes previewing every dang bowl game, starting with the New Orleans Bowl. Please remember: these are hardly ever informative, even by Fullcast standards. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome! Oh, God, that was shrill. To the shutdown fullcast. I am not Spencer Hall. I'm Ryan Nanny. I'm joined by Jason Kirk, our beloved Atlantan, who's you made. I just want to say rest in peace to Spencer Hall. Can we, can you not spoil that?

Can we get to that? We're keeping the death of our co-hosts a secret? For the, we're building Miss, do you know how podcasts work? You're supposed to build suspense. This is how, like, serialized something. Just to be surprised that Spencer drowned.

So the first episode was going to be like, where is he? What happened? And then in the Cure Bowl episode, we find clues. And in the Vegas ball episode, we find that he, he,

he's vanished. We find a bloated body, but we have an ID to it. We send some samples off to the lab. And then in the New Mexico ball, we take photos of the dead body, and we post them on Twitter at Spencer saying, this you?

It turns out his skin tone after spending three days in a canal is remarkably similar to his skin tone on like a February afternoon. And then in the Camellia Ball Preview, we discovered that it. The government of Alabama did it, whoever that is. We don't know. It doesn't matter. That's Holly Anderson, who. Hey, you can't get rid of me ever.

Yeah, you know how I did that thing on Twitter? I was like, who would you like to see on the fullcasts? Which I appreciated because I like the notion that I had been fired from this podcast before they managed to fire you. Fair. For the record, plenty of people asked for Holly to be on. But we also got a bunch of, you know, typical shut down full cast listener responses, including Alex Jones.

I did go to Info Wars and Alex Jones is one of the few Info Wars full-timers who does not have an email address listed. So there was no way for me to get him. And I was definitely not getting Paul Joseph Watson. I was definitely not going down that. I feel like Alice Jones and I at least have similar head circumference. We will never find that out. Extremely large heads. That's what they said about you being a bloomin onion mascot, buddy. Our special boy. Yeah. I should, yeah, so you're right. We should start by, I will start by thinking. And the big vein of every day should be Saturday. every bowl should be the outback ball Every bowl should be the goddamn outback ball

And now I get to Now I get to be close to Will Mustchamp Like I always wanted Are you gonna like nuzzle him with your With your, what do you call it? Tendrils? What do they call the petals of the onion? I think they're called petals. Yeah You get to run out there

When Harbaugh and Mushchamp are charging at each other Like two uncaged bowls You get to put your big you're a big fried doughy circumference in front of them. A big old crash test. Blumen onion is a vegetable.

All right. Oh, does that mean you'll repel him like magnets with like poles? What is this? No, I don't like, what are you? What are you not made of beef? Honey, you're talking to a glubber. Batter, you're supposed to be a friend of mine.

For frying oil is supposed to be a friend of Will Must Champ and I'm betrayed. Why is this weird burger hugging me? You know the great thing about bringing this up now, many, many, many episodes before the Outback Bowl podcast is that we give our listeners all that time between now and then to imagine the biosphere that your sweaty, weird body is going to create inside this non-breatheable suit in Tampa. Yeah. Readers, please at Ryan at Celebrity Hotub on Twitter and tell him what you think he's going to smell like. Probably like a blooming onion. They're going to have to burn the suit.

They probably. They probably should. I will clarify, so I've talked to the Outback people, I am only going to be the onion for the third quarter, which is fine with me. I think that will, A, help cut down on stink, right? What do you mean what? Wait, so you, no, do they have, I didn't realize this was played by multiple people like kids in a nutcracker production.

No, no, it's not. it's not usually but um this is this is usually it's just one person who i think is an outback employee i'm not 100% sure on that after half time you have to step into a stranger's damp onion suit there's well there's a um so they asked me for my uh unitard size so i'll have my own unitar which of course you knew he's married to katelyn he has this information to hand Anyway, we're going to talk about the New Orleans Bowl, which is the first, confusingly, as Holly pointed out, is the first bowl of bowl season this weekend. I don't know what happened to Gildan. I don't know why Gildan decided to surrender this important spot in the bowl calendar.

I feel like it was out of respect for Spencer. For his death? A frequent user of Gildan products. They're going dark for the morning. well you know and the products are so absorbent that you know they know that like oh that just makes people

think of water and Spencer drowning but again we're not going to get into that um all right before holly you have something you want to share about this bowl I believe this is I I would just like to spotlight the New Orleans bowl not just because it's first and we always have

this weird affection in our hearts for the first but because there's there's some things to know about the New Orleans Bowl this year, like despite being in New Orleans and being a postseason game, guys, keep me honest here, it's always been kind of eh as a ball game, especially compared to the Sugar Bowl, which

is run by like a haunted runaway mind cart full of insane corrupt people. I feel like there have been some good ones, but you're probably right that it's more me than not. The Norland's ball always seemed to me like the kids spot sugar bowl.

There was that. This was the bleeding strength. Coach Bowl? Yeah. Was he wearing sunglasses? Yeah. Oh, indoors? Yeah, it's a dome. Of course you're wearing sunglasses.

There's a glare. Gotcha. Please, go on. But it's mostly been like the kids bopped sugar bowl, right? I don't feel like a lot of people would argue with that. Until this year, like basic facts you need to know about the New Orleans Bowl. We're going to tell you what the teams are and then we're just going to go back to making fun of the game. Hello, if you're new.

It's literally always going to be like this. Sorry, Rose Bowl. Sometimes it will be worse, to be clear. Yeah, yeah, that is fair. This year's New Orleans Bowl features Troy, the school known for going 10 and 2, and nobody noticed because the second loss was 19 to 8 at midseason at home to South Alabama. Wait, wait, just refresh my memory. What game would that come immediately after?

That would be after they beat a plucky upstart team known as the LSU Tigers in Baton Rouge, 24 to 21. Hey, this is the LSU fans in New Orleans. Orleans. Guess he's coming to visit. Which is, yeah, yeah. There's bad, there's bad juju on both sides, and I'll get to that. Their opponent is North Texas, the team known for losing to Florida Atlantic twice this year, the first time giving up 69 points to Lane Kiffin, and should never, ever, ever be forgiven for allowing him what I'm sure was a riotous evening of Beavis laughs in the locker room after that went down.

The game is not at 11 a.m. He also just laughed that you said went down for the record. God damn it. Never. Our largest adult son will allow us not a moment of peace. The game is not at 11 a.m. anymore, nor is it at 9 p.m., both of which were kind of the same bad idea, just executed differently. It's at noon.

The thing that I wanted to share is local merch. There's a company called Bayou Apparel that's putting out Bolswag this. And because it's Louisiana, I clicked on drinkware to see what I might be able to purchase to commemorate this New Orleans Bowl. And the first item on the drinkware page is a poncho. That's when you know you're drinking a lot. Well, listen, you sew the head shut. You turn it upside down. Boom.

You got a hell of a martini glass. I was actually picturing fans standing spread eagled and people just flinging. buckets of well liquor at their faces and just whatever goes in your mouth, that's the drink. Oh, my God. I have a really clean form of body shots. I have a different fact about the R&L Carriers New Orleans Bull. Are you going to talk about the concert? I am going to talk about the concert.

Yes. So they, you know, all these bowl games have events in the three or four days proceeding, which are ostensibly for the players and the coaches and staff and family and all that, but they're also a way to say like, hey, fans come to this game, come a couple days early, there's stuff you to do. In general, I find that the pre-bowl events function as a really good guide to you, the vacationer, as to what can I do in this town if I don't drink? What can I do in this town if my church brought a bus here? Yes, that's a perfect example of it.

They're doing the I Love the 90s concert, which I thought was covers, and it's not. No. Jason, what if I told you you could go to the New Orleans Bowl and see Salt and Pepper, Vanilla Ice, Kid and Play, Coolio, Young MC, Rob Bass, Color Me Bad, all on one stage. I feel like Kulio's got to be kind of above this at this point. Doesn't he have Martha Stewart money now? I really would never assume that Kulio is above anything. So this is the New Orleans Bowl we're still talking about?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And usually this concert is like the gin blossoms or a band that's easily confused with the gin blossoms. I didn't even know they really up the game. So like, we're beyond just they got enough money for a Spotify account to play these. They have enough money to actually... Right, which is what I thought it was. No, no, no, no. This was like the kids bot presents the 90s.

No. It is literal salt, pepper, and ice. Here's the thing, you're both wrong. Because what the New Orleans Bowl has done here is pulled off a very good fraud. This group is touring the United States as part of a I Love the 90s tour. They're just stopping in New Orleans and playing this concert. the night before the New Orleans Bowl. So they were going to be there anyway.

Yes. And R&L has just been like, that's a bowl event. Look at that. Wait, so the New Orleans bowl is like a Ramora on the Great White Shark of New Orleans. Yes. And you guys are all the delicious chum? And just like that Great White Shark, I'm desperate to split open New Orleans belly and see what's inside. Just pitching a ride on Biz Markey.

The Norlands Bowl also has one of my, this is weird, one of the other things you can always usually find at this game, at these games besides a weird concert is a fun run. The New Orleans Bowl has the only one of these that I want to mention because it takes place inside the Superdome. Like you run into the Superdome and around the concourses and stuff for like two miles, and that's the race. And I kind of love this because I picture it being like one of those marble madness play sets,

especially if everyone's wearing the same colored t-shirt. And also a lot of these people are probably drunk. And this is good for practicing chasing Saints fans out of their own stadium. Go Falcons.