Shutdown Fullcast - Shutdown Fullcast 4.48 - Please Check On Your Undefeated Team

Episode Date: October 31, 2016

West Virginia and Boise and Baylor and Nebraska were all undefeated. They aren't now, which, well, sorry y'all. This episode has a good five minutes of I don't really know what at the beginning, followed by this: - A conference referee taxonomy - Pointing out that Tennessee lost to a child quarterback born after the last Volunteer national title - Admiring Notre Dame's persistence in trying to lose yet again - Explaining how PJ Fleck will beat USC three times in 2017 - The origins of the universe as they relate to Georgia football - Doing Louisville a solid by saying very little about how they almost lost to UVA - Doing Ohio State a MAJOR solid by not even talking about the Northwestern game - A celebration of Wyoming winning by safety - DUDES DUDES DUDES DUDES DUDES DUDES Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to the shutdown forecast. I am Spencer Hall, editor of Every Day Should Be Saturday, also work for SB Nation. I'm here to discuss college football, as we are every week. But this on a particularly momentous week, let me say this, a lot of teams that were undefeated coming into this weekend. Guess what, y'all? No, they got them a loss. They got marked. They done got their allotment of losses started because quite a few teams.

finally lost a game but not Alabama Remember Alabama Always a step ahead Alabama always more equipped More bodied Deeper Just playing chess when everyone else is playing

Not even checkers But like Candyland They're just pulling cards man What did Alabama do this weekend That was so above The level of everyone else's confidence. Jason Kirk, our college football editor, what did Alabama refuse to do, thus avoiding all of the problems? Bama refused to play football. Wise. While these other teams that had

zeros in their records were out here like 2000s era sneakerheads and picking up ones, you know what I mean, in their records, Bama was just sitting pretty, real pretty. Always a step ahead. Nick Saban's brilliance never ceases to amaze for seeing a weekend, when all would go sideways for everyone who played Alabama wisely engaged, ye old bye week this week. Roll tide, y'all. I mean, I keep waiting for a stumble. And yet again, even in this week, Alabama triumphs.

So truly our greatest national resource for football excellence, the Alabama Crimson Tide. Ryan Nanny joining us from Brooklyn. You know, how's your dad rage? You weren't really prepared for this, but become a father, you inherit a very. vast reservoir of dad rage how are you handling it is rage the right term for it because i don't i don't necessarily feel angry i just feel like slightly yeah you're right it's rage it's a

constant state of god dang it yeah yeah it's it's i have an emotional pine cone firmly lodged up my ass and it's good always be there yeah yeah it's there now you just inherited it i've discussed this before the word god damn it became especially precious to me i say it with more feeling and greater saver than i ever did before i had kids and when i doubled up it just became all that much richer do you have a profanity that you uh prefer to resort to um not yet i think i'm getting there still i'm you know what I am trying to sort of mind what is said around the child. My wife probably has one.

No words are being understood yet, though. So you're free to express yourself. I hear what you're saying, but I also feel like it's one of those things where the minute you start dropping motherfucker and asshole a lot around your infant child, two weeks later, science is like, oh, guys, quick update? yeah they hear all of that all of that is coming through sorry about that Scientology would tell you like there's an alien in her mind recording all the stuff

Exactly on a reel to real tape That only somebody with an e-meter can hear Yeah It's more I think it's more disregard I think at this point That most of the Most of the other things in the world

I feel emotionally severed from Because I just don't It's not that I don't care about them it's that I can't care about them. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Where it's just like, yeah, okay, that happened. But, like, I can care about that or I can sleep.

I can care about that or I can take the trash out. These are, I feel, you know, it's like being a sim. There's no point in the Sims where they're like, oh, why doesn't your, why doesn't your Sim care about the state of the world? Or think about, you know, the broader implications of death or consider something they can do to better of themselves. It's like, no, man, you got meters and you got to fill them, or you're going to piss yourself and set the oven on fire.

You got to try doing that too. It's really you're going to be trapped in a fort made of sofas forever. I mean, that shit, we just covered the Florida Georgia game right there. I'll be honest after a night, staying up late and then hanging out with some kids today.

You could probably trap me in a fort. Fuller made of pillows. It would not be hard. I'd just give up. Like, fine. Yeah, that's one of those where it's like, oh no, not in the fort made of pillows. No.

Oh, no. Anything but that. The perfect crime. My Texas flag says, come and take it. Not come and take it, but no, come and take it. Please. Snatch the life out of these lungs. Leave it there.

Leave it there. You know what the cooling bills for the LMO are? Please take it. Please tread on me. But I'm going to rally. I'm not going down like this. I'm going to find something inside of me. God, you know what?

A little support would be fucking nice. Oh, buddy. No, it's just like where you are going, where you are going, the others have gone before. Like, yeah. It'll be different. Yeah. Uh-huh. Listen.

I'm going to survive the Sarlack Pit. You'll see. Listen, in three years, let's revisit this. If we're doing this podcast in three years, what the fuck happened? I mean, it becomes even more lucrative. I'm saying when we are on NBC, doing this program, NBC sports sometimes will dabble. But Maine NBC, yeah, we'll revisit this topic.

we're the judges on the voice can we go full can we go full uh shitty radio guy at that point absolutely where we have fake voices we just invent for this right or we are like we have topics that are basically just did you see like oh you know did you did you see with the election did you did you see that it's crazy really something yeah you can call us we get paid to talk so you should talk if gay marriage is so great how come a gay married man hasn't won the national championship yeah you just you just dial in I'm tired of all these I'm just speaking to listen listen I'm just speaking truth here man look it up these are facts

yeah these are these are facts and I'm not really going to let what people say is comfortable or cool or not flagrantly racist dictate what i say man like for instance uh you know what topic today cam newton how about that guy huh that guy that guy you see what he wore you see what he wore right the clothes on his body you folks you got to go to our website 901 the the sports dot com the biz that we posted like the radios guy they do that like go to our facebook page it's the only place on the internet with a a photo of Cam Newton on it. You can see it there and leave a comment

on a radio station's Facebook page. That will be the place to move minds. We put Sonic the Hedgehog's tail on him. We didn't care. Our show will be called Call of Duty Infinite Warfare.

I'm sure the video game company will be fine with that. We'll give everybody, we'll give everybody badges and ranks that we keep very poorly, right? Like Mel from Southwest Atlanta calls in and we're like, hey Mel, yeah, that's a 32 ranker. Achievement unlocked, brother!

Yeah, and there's somebody screaming in like they do in the game. Like, level 33. Oh, that's a kill shot! That's a kill shot to camp. Yeah, and it's like... 35. 100 points. Fragged him! You fragged him good, bro! We give them special

power-ups, right? Like, we allow them to camp. That would be the best is to allow someone to camp. the whole show. Yeah, exactly. Like, he just lurks the whole time and, like, leaps in whenever he wants, right? Like, somebody just, like, he's like, that's wrong, bro.

Whoa. I'm calling an airstrike. I'm calling Kaepernick right now. Actually, for on radio, it would just be, like, giving you a cool voice changer. That would be like, yo, dude, you get super base for the next 30 minutes.

This is awesome. You get sniper voice. We're just going to turn your body. Way, way down. It'll sound really cool. Do you hear the hot takes that he drops? They're even more lethal. Leaple when he drops them in.

See how far you have to lean in to see what the sniper is hitting you with. It's the takes you don't hear that kill you. What are we talking? Holy shit. Can we talk about a game? I'm sorry, this is my fault. We talked about the team that didn't play. Sure, that was it.

We've covered so much hot non-act. Two teams that didn't play, Ryan. We talked about Bama and Georgia. Okay, I want to back up, I want to back up and say, I kept my promise for the noon games this Saturday. I said that there was almost no scenario in which I would watch a single snap of Kentucky, Missouri, and I did it. I don't want to brag, but I didn't watch any of that game.

You know what? I kept my promise, too, because I swore that I would be tuning in to the banger of all bangers Georgia Tech Duke and low was I correct because Georgia Tech Duke ended up being a bangor it ended up being real good back and forth game Duke gets

Duke falls behind they roar back it ends up being 3835 naturally because Georgia Tech is a run first triple option flex bone kind of team you know they they pass for 264 yards in Cs

Jesus yeah Yeah, Justin Thomas, by the way, massive day that, like, very quietly, that very few people will even talk about because, you know, it's not PC, bro, Monty. But here are the dues we drop all the hotness. Yeah, he had 264 yards passing, and he rushed for 195. So, my, naturally, my loyalty towards this game, the nerds versus Duke's aristocrats special paid off. This was actually really fun to watch. So thanks, y'all.

A game between a three and five and a five and three team. What's more ACC than that? Only that it was very entertained. So I want to go ahead and pat myself in the back for being randomly right about a non-important game there. Way to go, Spence. I'm proud of you. In the noon spot. Yeah, not in general, just specifically.

This is the only thing we're proud of you for. You've got to start somewhere. I watched Michigan State and just let the disrespect just wash over me like a cold blanket and just felt myself being lowered into the vat of disrespect. Is this the part where we talk about Mark D' Antonio's math error? I would love to discuss that, especially for somebody who can, yeah, which, let's do this. the initial math error was having no big 10 wins coming into this game. Well, that, I mean, I look at that as more of a systems engineering problem,

not like a carry the one kind of thing. Yeah. But I see what you're saying. There's that. There's a Kirk Fancy field goal kind of situation where after the game, again, just like last week, it was like, is coach aware of like, you know, two point? You know, like there's a, there's that. And then at the very end, Michigan State scored with a second to go.

And there was probably like a point zero zero one chance of actually coming out with the victory. Just go ahead, kick the field goal. Then you're down by, I think it would have been six. It would have been six point. Yeah. It would have been six. You'd still need a touchdown, which is almost impossible to do. You kick an onside.

And I mean, does the clock not start if you were covering onside? I've never thought about that before, but would have been a hell of a way to find out. I think the only way you can do it is, and this is me just making up rules, I think if you kicked an onside and it went off a Michigan player, then you could advance it, maybe, but that could be wrong too. Maybe if a Michigan player caught it with one foot out of bounds. Right. Okay, here's what happens.

Michigan player catches it, runs it back to the end zone, drops it, Michigan State recovers for the game winning touchdown. A double agent. That's how it happens. You activate the sleeper cell. Okay. So you would count on something like that. But instead, Michigan State chose to go for two.

Antonio later said he was sending a mental message, which, okay, we're super tough. We're just super tough and never stopped fighting, even though there was a sad field goal earlier in the game. But instead, the pitch was awry. And Gibral Peppers took those two points because he does not have enough of those on the year, apparently. And he got the...

Yeah, he got to dunk on the lowly miserable pathetic Spartans. I'm just trying to load them up with more disrespect for this year, because this is all the hope that they have left. So much disrespect. Remember Mark Dantonio, basically a disrespect engineer. He can take a dry well with no disrespect in it and have it producing several thousand gallons of it per day. That's just how good he is, a generated.

disrespect. Also good at generating disrespect, Michigan, because they continue to fuel the Michigan State rivalry, but one, not acknowledging it. Two, not really making this the beat down that it could have been, they definitely called the dogs off. And that's why it's a 32-23 game, when realistically, this could have been like a 40 to 10 game. And finally, the last bit of disrespect, in case you doubt how bad it's been from Michigan State, which I don't think you do. Just so come over here on the Peninsula of Agreement and Concord with me. And look at their record. They're two and six.

And they came in, O and four in the Big Ten, and they leave. Oh, and five. There are two Big Ten schools that have given up more points in conference play than Michigan State. Those schools are Rutgers in Purdue. So this is why the Big Ten added Purdue Yes that's what it is That's Listen at least Purdue is showing

Is showing a willingness to change At least Purdue has a Big Ten conference win Oh boy Illinois Has a Big Ten conference win Right now In the Big Ten East Maryland and Indiana are both looking down at Michigan State.

That's mean. Yeah, it's, it's grim. So when do the Spartans play Rutgers? Because that's, you got to circle that one on the calendar now. Okay, that's a couple weeks. Yeah. It's a home game, though. Beat Notre Dame, though.

Oh, my God, you're right. I totally forgot about that. Hey, Listen, Notre Dame won this week. They're still tied for last in the state of Indiana rankings, I believe. But, yeah, they beat Miami. Listen, I said I was 51% rooting for Notre Dame and Notre Dame run. You're welcome, Irish.

Yeah, Notre Dame did every damn thing it could to give this game away. It got a 20-point lead, and then I think Muff 2 punts had an onside kick and some other special teams shenanigans. we couldn't even figure out but oh man they they tried so hard to become two and six like Michigan State is but failed and became three and five like Oregon and Ole Miss are the games the games that we referred to that were were finally some undefeated teams chalking up losses Clemson was not one of them Clemson managed to actually dodge this bullet they at the night game special they pull off a

37-34 win over Florida State. A really good game. I know that right now the thing to do would be to parse every single down of this game and try to find some weakness in Clemson. And they're there. Deshawn Watson and Joyce turning the ball over, for instance. And Florida State managed to rush for a pretty good amount of yardage on them, albeit with a revived, rejuvenated, and extremely dangerous Delvin Cook.

And they also managed to, you know, pass a little bit when they were not literally peeling their quarterback out of a three-inch deep divot in the turf because Florida State's offensive line they cannot pass protect against three happy schnauzer puppies it's bad right now DeAndre francois is getting hammered it's painful to watch at one point McGuire was warming up to come in because they weren't sure whether he could make it but an entertaining game I have no problem with this game this is one of those like games where you go Wow, I enjoyed watching that. I think both teams are, both teams are just fine.

And after the game, Jimbo Fisher, he got his money's worth, got fined $20,000 bucks for saying that the refs were cowards. Cowardly, wrong, gutless, a few other things. This was Jimbo's hottest rant ever. And in classic Jimbo fashion, it took him about four seconds to peel it off. That's $20,000 found in four seconds. That is efficient, brother. What I like about this was Jimbo made the very calculated decision to focus on one particular illegal block called against Florida State, which I think even the most Florida of Florida fans can say, yeah, that was kind of an iffy call. In real time, probably a harder one to make, but not one that you looked at and said, oh, definitely that was the right call.

and if to be fair ACC officials made it a hash this game they did not they did not cover themselves in glory but here's what smart Florida State had 12 other penalties in this game they are committing penalties and racking up penalty yardage

at an alarming rate this season they're up to almost 84 yards of penalty yards a game which is third worst in the nation Oregon you're ahead of And they're in that category, too. Good job. Jimbo's coaching staff accrue another penalty immediately after that one.

Correct. It wasn't really spelled out exactly what happened. People said it was on Jimbo, but after looking at it, it doesn't seem like it was. He was definitely cussing, and he was way out on the field. He was playing free safety at one point. Yeah, and on the final drive when Florida State looked like they were moving the ball in a good position to at least send the game to overtime maybe win it, They kept racking up stupid penalties on the offensive line, and, I mean, I get what Jimbo was saying, but it's a very, it's sort of like if you go on a, if you lead the police on a highway chase, and at one point, you're like, no, that light was yellow.

That one light, the one that I read, that one was yellow. I did hit all those other cars. I did side swipe all those other cars. That's true. and I did accidentally clip that dog. But other than that, my wanted levels to be four stars, not five, why do you have tanks?

Yeah, those tanks are cowardly. And the penalty was huge. Like, it dialed back a 40-yard run, I think, that would have set up in scoring position and would have added to Dalvin Cook's very deserving Heisman candidacy, Heism finalist candidacy at least. you know it was just one penalty and then you made it worse not necessarily you jimbo i know you listen

um i know you listen jimbo but i mean it yeah it was just one we talk way too slow for jimbo to listen this shot no he's got one of the podcast apps where you can speed up to like 2.5 god i can really imagine what i sound like on that minutes jesus imagine that y'all you can be done listening to this in 10 minutes yeah the the the the final thing about that jimbo thing it was called on a staffer But cheers and kudos to the ACC official, who, after pressing the issue on a bad performance, heard what he thought was some slight dissent from the sidelines and decided to just keep it rolling. Yeah. Love that, like, you know, after throwing 13 flags and really making sure that you guys, this is the other thing, Jimbo had such a good, quick rant after the game that it's almost a shame he talked so fast that it ruined the delivery because he said, said yeah you know they made sure that you know the game is about them everybody's looking at them

which is my favorite thing about ac c refs because they really are there there's different kinds of bad officiating understand that cc refs are just periodically negligent and incompetent right pack 12 refs act 12 reps are they're there for art and for art's sake they're there because like what can i call here that has never been called before the pack 12 it's like it's a theatrical artiste. Exactly. We're into some deep performance art shit. I'm never ever bored watching

the bad decisions of Pac-12 refs. Whereas Big 12 refs are just not there. I think Big 12 refs just want to be over. They want to be out as soon as possible. So that's why every Big 12 game they're like, yeah, forward progress. Yep. No,

no, he was down. No, just keep playing. Just keep going. Guys, we really need to speed this up. We got to take a 15-minute review, just to act like we're doing something serious. This is not an hourly job. I knew we negotiated this the wrong way. ACC-Refs, there's a real showmanship to him. Yeah, they're there to control the game.

They know that you're there, not to watch football, but to watch outstanding officiating. Has anyone ever complained about Big Ten reps? I'm sure there's Big Ten fans who think, like, oh, our kids. conference refs are the worst shut up you have no idea what you're talking about i don't know how you pulled it off and your reps are fine but i think the only thing big 10 refs big 10 fans can play in bad is that you get all the calls when you're at home yeah big 12 that just seems like a courtesy thing which is very big 10 but big 12 breaths i'm convinced big 12 breaths are actually just a fitness support group crossfit that's it that's why they also want to keep play

moving like no every time we stop for a review that's You know, I'm getting out of anaerobic here. Somebody get the ERG machine out here. I would love if Big 12 refs just got out rowing machines during every review. That's how you actually get the chains. So you have to drag it to a row machine. It's like one of those companies where you have every meeting you have to plank the whole time just to ensure the meeting doesn't last more than a minute.

You do that for every review. Put the screen like on the ground, I guess. Yeah, but yeah, this is ACC refs, my least favorite. just either my least favorite or my most favorite of Ron Cherry's doing it because I give up on the notion that the game will have any rhythm whatsoever or that the game will not completely be controlled by either the tick-taciest or the most imagined of calls at all times. Ron Cherry is a saint. You said Ron Cherry's name and I just can't help. It just brings so much joy. So much joy to heart.

We'll go ahead and include it with the post, but remember Ron Cherry, did my favorite fine related call ever he signals for her first down he claps extends his arm and then the arm wiggles wiggles like

a motherfucking trebiochet it just it wang wang wang whing wong it wiggles it wiggles like uh like seriously like he's it is no it's like it's

it's like when wily coyote launches himself from a trebishe and it sort of has that wobble afterwards. Jason nailed it. And it looks it sort of looks like a tomahawk chop, but it was not an FHU game. It was a

man, Virginia Tech game. You can hear it making the noise in my head, which is like that. I love that, man. He's wonderful. Yeah, he's great. I hate watching games. I think he's my least favorite referee of all time when he's

not being my favorite. If that makes any sense. And my kid used to go to a school where one of the administrators was his daughter. She says, oh yeah, my dad calls games. And I said, well, what's your dad's name? Because, oh, my dad's name is Ron Cherry. And the look on my face was so horrified

and conflicted all at once because I remember thinking, I was like, oh my God! And then I was like, I hope she doesn't try to decipher the source of my joy. Because it's really kind of a harm joy. Like, oh my God, your dad is the worst rep I've ever seen.

That's harsh. I disagree with that. But if you say, like, I'm a ref, my name is this. And people are like, oh, yeah, I know you. That's not good. Yeah. Yeah, it's true. It's good of your hockey, and that's about it. I should be like, who is your dad? And they're like, I don't know. And I was like, does he look like? And then I start listing casual nicknames for refs, right? Like, beef ref. Oh, my dad is Glasses, ref. That's his legal name. That's what I call him. Glass's ref is the worst ref I've ever seen. Ron Cherry is my least favorite because the way it calls a game. But he's not utterly incompetent. Glasses ref was fucking bad. Glasses ref was on acid, and that's what made him so good. Remember that there was a guy who made all of the acid in the United States. He was making it out of an underground lab. That's Glasses ref. He disappeared, right?

The feds were like, yeah, we found the guy who did it, and we arrested him. And then suddenly this guy pops up in the Pac-12 calling games with no idea what he's doing. That's Glass's Rough. didn't glasses rough didn't glosses rough call the was it Wisconsin Arizona State game that got all wonky probably let's go ahead and blame him for it

this is the shitty excuse to talk about Wisconsin Nebraska you fell for you idiot oh god damn it I reeled you in um yeah Nebraska Nebraska you have a loss the rest of us congrats Nebraska you just made things easier for everybody

we appreciate that so moving along Another team that picked up one, West Virginia. Oh, yeah, I know. The dream is alive, the dream is dead. Skylar Howard didn't have a real good game, got pressure at Oklahoma's. Oklahoma State's defense played really, really well. Their offense, just productive, not particularly, like, spectacular, but really took advantage of mistakes on West Virginia's part.

They went 3720. West Virginia is now unwinn-feated, or they are now defeated. They have a loss. Is Oklahoma State the one big 12 team that it's like, yeah, we know what they're going to do pretty much every week. I mean, other than Kansas. Like Oklahoma State, I guess you lose to Central Michigan. That's bad. But other than that, every result is sure, that makes sense.

I talked about this with Dan on Wakeup this morning. That Central Michigan game possibly has fucking playoff implications now. Because if we're talking about an Oklahoma State team that otherwise, has one loss, and it's on the road at Baylor early in the season, and they run through the rest of the Big 12 schedule, and they have a non-conference win against Pitt, which, you know, it's Pitt. It's not like the jewel of your crown, but it's something. They're probably, at least in the conversation,

but you lost the Central Michigan on some bullshit, so you're probably done. Tremendous. Yeah. Fire mochips. Remember, the Mac controls the crown at all times. That game was Big 12 refs in a Mac review booth, if I recall correctly. It might be the other way around, but. AFC South spotters, I believe.

Makes sense if it's a Big 12 crew because they thought, oh, just get it over with. Yeah, fine, they want. If we have a team in the playoff, they're going to make us call it. That's not how it works. It might be. The Big 12's other representative, potential representative from an undefeated perspective, Baylor Baylor lost

the solving so many problems at once and creating another of course because that's all Baylor does is make serious

huge problems and you know turn a blind eye towards horrific gang rapes on campus yeah that came out this week thanks Wall Street Journal

so seriously thanks since no one in Waco seems to be reporting on it the Baylor Texas game Texas now at 4 and 4 Texas getting chance of Charlie

Charlie Charlie as he leaves the field, which is a nice thought. There's no way he's keeping that job. But they beat Baylor by one point of knocking them out of the picture. And further driving home the point that we're really wondering, like, why does the Big 12 exist? I don't think they know at this point. I don't think they can answer that. I think that's why they didn't expand.

It's sort of like when they chose not to take expansion teams, it struck me as the sad man who is in a relationship but breaks it off because like it's never going to work long term this isn't going to go anywhere we're not going to get married like i like you and you like me and so it's better if this just ends now so it's like the big 12 shouting to houston and cincinnati like it's too late for me save yourself save yourself stay in the american athletic conference maybe you can get pack 12 membership so good luck at Cincinnati

Tell them you're on Australia to BYU They're just like I don't know you do what you do I don't know how you feed yourself I don't know you Yeah you should know this About Cincinnati

Just a quick side note Currently four and four One in four in Conference and lost the temple 34 to 13 That thing where Tommy Tuverville is trying to get back to the SEC see i don't think i don't think it's happening i think this is like in i think this is like

inception hey hey hey hey hey hold up hold up hold up temple temple's a respectable school temple's done things recently you know who cincinnati didn't lose to this week south carolina oh ryan our being of speaking of a former cincinnati head coach our boy our boy did it yeah He did it. Our sweet idiot boy. Who is now 0 in 5 against Will Must Jamp all time? Tennessee is. Tennessee has never beaten this idiot child.

Tennessee can't beat Mongo. Tennessee is 0 is 0 and 4 against Bongo. Oh and 5. 0 5, yeah. Oh, and 5. Yeah, exactly. You know what? Just for Will Must champ, if you take those five wins and you add them to zero,

that's still five wins. That's real good. Yeah. I'll do the math for you, Mongo. Oh, yeah. Josh, I actually was. Yeah, go ahead. Please.

I was almost pulling for him, almost. Like, at the end of that game, because this came down to one of those punt or go for it, Cidgos, to run out clock. And watching Will Mustamp and Butch Jones both collectively refused to think or act at the end of a game, it's magnificent. Yeah. awesome like they could have they could have you know let's try to win the game with a play here

nope nope neither one let's try to block the punt no should we no just it's it's a it's a lincoln douglas debate where both sides are mad they can't strangle the other one with the microphone cord what do you mean i just have to talk in poker i check well i check well you check sir we haven't even you're not even sitting at the table yet i don't sit us thinking when I stand. Yeah. Josh Dobbs got outduled by Jake Bentley, who is like

15 years old? Is that correct? He is supposed to be a high school senior right now. That's not a joke. He skipped his senior year of high school to beat in the sea in football. Born November 23rd, 1997.

Wow. Wow. So, yeah. There are Joe albums older than he is. So Tennessee just lost to a quarterback who is almost as old as their last national title. Wow. Oh, God. Yeah, so things are going good, Butch Jones, right?

I mean, what's really special about this is Tennessee fans, more so than anybody else, spent, I think Tennessee fans were possibly angrier than LSU fans about what happened with the Florida LSU game. especially when it looked like it might not happen at all. They were like, no, you got to play that game. They all count and, you know, you're just trying to dodge it so you can sneak your way into this. Well, maybe you should have focused on your own schedule there, Tennessee. That's all I'm saying.

Florida just says, I guess we won't play that after all. Tennessee too busy peeking over to the other journal, seeing what you're doing, pissed all over yourself. Actually, no, Florida still doesn't need that because you have to hold off Kentucky. Oh, yeah, but that's a totally different issue Yeah, Kentucky wasn't the one mad that Florida wasn't playing I know, I was just proposing that you cancel it again out of spite Even though it's against the rules, but just feel like, well, fuck the rules What are you going to send Kentucky? Like, call their bluff. Say like, oh, you're really going to send Kentucky to your biggest game of the year?

Here, let me go ahead and say this. Yes, yes, we should. I like Florida football. I'm a Florida fan I don't always show it in healthy ways, and I think a lot of people think it's bullshit, and that's fine. But I'm totally fine with Kentucky winning the East this year. Yeah, same, because guess what Kentucky gets to do? They get to play Alabama. And I hope that that would, in my heart of hearts, I want that game to be so bad that the playoff committee looks at it and says, Oh, well, this is the championship game. SEC's not that good.

And drops Alabama to like third. Even though Jeff Long isn't doing the eight-second explanations of the rankings this year, I just want Jeff Long to pop up. Like, we felt that the elimination of the SEC's 13th data point provided Alabama with an insufficient body of work because they only had 12 data points on the year. Mr. Long, they played 13 games. our records do not reflect that did they this game was not televised really so yeah Kentucky take it is all yours baby yeah well I don't want again I don't want to watch

Luke Del Rio under that pass rush who yeah but but I will say this you know what Luke Del Rio's got a win over Georgia that that you can name almost any Florida quarterback and they have that it's true it's true he's got a win over Georgia this year and that's uh that's that's that's that's that's the spite uh you know completing a pass the other way that's despite not looking too impressive at times doesn't really matter when you have a defense like that and also it doesn't really matter when you're a team as formless in coate um hot like the hot and formless and nonsensical like like the early beginnings of a universe georgia fan let me just let me just let me just take you it to the niel degrass tyson vibe here

Ooh, now you're, this is, ooh, you're talking evolution to Georgia fans now. A comet is intentionally thrown out of bounds. And when it is, Georgia football is formed. You're telling Georgia, Georgians, that the Earth is more than 6,000 years old. Careful, brother. Journey, no, journey with me to 300 years ago when the Earth was formed, George, Pan. Jesus, as Jesus preaches to the dinosaurs. In a spaceship that looks like a yetty tumbler.

as Vince Dooley descended from Mount Sinai and threw this in the air like a bone and thus did that bone become a spaceship that shaped like a beautiful and expensive cooler we go to your team yes forming in the early Kirby Smartian period

when they decided that they couldn't run the ball with Nick Chubb when the earth was formed in the year 1980 yeah as Moses wandered the earth he too could not find the zone. Yeah, that's just, just like Nick Chubb, just like the Georgia offense.

This was your usual unbearable cocktail party. I hate watching this game. Everyone should. I watched so much of it. I watch more of it than I am comfortable admitting. It's time for a little, it's time for little prices right over under a number of carries Nick Chubb had on the day, Jason. I didn't watch a second of this game.

I'm going to be quite honest. So, yeah, that's good. I was watching Baylor, Texas. Pee-phew! How many carriers do you think Nick Chubb had? 13. I mean, they didn't have the ball very long. I know the answer to this, so I'm not going to.

Okay, so you're refrain. Jason, you're over. Bo-bo-bo-d-do-boo. Yeah. That seems bad. Oh, the one highlighted I did see was Jacob Easton from 55 yards away. He beamed that end-zone pylon. The pylon, yeah.

He nailed it. Yeah. This was Georgia's worst offensive performance since, I believe, the golf era. yeah that's not that they had 1896 against kentucky and it was like a four and seven Kentucky or something not a good Kentucky team no this was uh this was

eight first downs this was 164 total yards this was preseason heism candidate getting nine carries for 20 yards hey hey but at least he had at least he had more carries than Georgia had punts

it was only one more but it was more so there's that this is wow yep so it was Georgia Florida

at least from one team Florida Florida declined to play Georgia Florida Florida just played sort of a normal football game from the sounds of it

yeah I think that's pretty accurate yeah you know just a procedural man just a procedural hey and now and now

and now Georgia gets to play Kentucky next and that's important that would be one of these teams division title hopes I mean

these teams are going in two different directions that's all I'm going to say yeah and it's not the one that you would in any realistic world assume was

Kentucky and it is Kentucky somehow somehow Kentucky by the way yeah yeah let's just run some numbers here okay

Kentucky about a month and a half ago, probably one of the worst teams in the world. I mean, in anything. They were losing conference USA games. You know your kickball team where you can never get enough players and you have to forfeit?

Kentucky was worse than that. What if the SEC East champion has a conference USA loss? Then... Who would be surprised? Oh, wait, this is easy. Western Michigan. takes the SEC East spot.

Correct. Would anyone have a problem with that at this point, even if you are a fan of one of the teams involved, if the choice is, even if Kentucky wins the SEC East, and woo, yay, Mark Stoops, you're a hero, wouldn't you rather see Western Michigan play Alabama than three lost Kentucky? Kentucky already played Alabama.

Didn't go great. Yeah, I'm going to sit there. You know what? If that happens, if Kentucky ends up playing Alabama, I'm going to appear in the front row wearing a blue linner. in shirt white pants and a mask made of the it means more woman 56 to 9 it just means and they'll catch me in the stands and I'll just sit there and I'll just

whatever it's it's it's really satisfying to start to to twist that into how sad that is because like if you're a Georgia fan and this means more to you oh my God what is ah the choices you have made yeah the original problem with the ad was that like are you sure it means more i mean ohio state has a hundred thousand people at a fucking spring practice and and you have like the the um the monopoly on crazy college football fandom but now it's like now it's like oh tennessee that that meant more to you you invested it's it's basically calling out people who invested poorly you you care a lot about this huh this oh you had

You had how much in Enron? Who, buddy? It does mean more to you. You're right. Yeah, I was just going to say it should mean more to Big Ten fans because what else you're going to do in Ohio? I mean, what else? Really. Like, they at least show, notice they showed the SEC ones and they say, oh, there's a boat.

People go out on boats and they go out and do stuff outside. What are you going to do in Ohio most of the year? Right? You can't even do all that fun wuzzi stuff they do in Wisconsin. like, you know, ritual murder and deer hunting. No, they, uh, you're just, you're just outside and it's gray and it sucks. And ritual deer hunting murder. Yeah.

What are you going to do? You're going to watch the calves? Be honest, you didn't do that before eight years ago. Boy, this is just, wow. Wow. You know, this is an Atlanta, an Atlanta calling out bandwagon sports fans. This is your, well, let me tell you, let me tell you why they're all tied together. Oh, God.

Go ahead. Let me tell you why the calves and the Browns. and the Buckeyes are actually all a part of this like virtue circle jerk that I base my life on. You did just say virtue circle jerk, right? Yeah, okay. Waited for it to sink in.

Yeah, how they're all just basically manifestations of my geographical virtue that are arbitrarily drawn. They all fight together to represent this kind of working class myth. Yeah, we have the worst NFL team um a basketball player was born here and our team drafted him so he was obligated to come back and uh we have a racist baseball team so it just means more is what i'm trying to say it's just more here in ohio it just means more this is this is

this is this is your best world series slander yet yeah oh i can't wait it's great when does that start another undefeated team though that has boats and it's still doing good Washington Washington you a lot like they had their they had their flat game uh Jake Browning didn't look great in this game there's two undefeated teams have boats by the way what's the other one uh well Bama Bama's got boats I was I was I was going to say I was going to say three we got three teams because one gets road oh oh western Michigan sure that's my mistake that's my mistake that's my mistake that's my mistake mistake. I'm sorry. Well, that's a metaphorical boat, right? Oh, okay. I don't know. It might be real. But yeah, Washington did have their off, their off game and still beat a very talented and very tough Utah team on the road. A win that, in all honesty, they probably won't get enough

credit for it because I would hate to play Utah. If they were in my conference, that's not, that's the team that I despise facing because I'm never really going to be wowed by their athleticism and I am going to absolutely hate how tough and nagging they are because this is a team that took Washington you know to the wire and got beaten on a special team play basically so congratulations to Utah on being just pissante and frustrating enough to almost take out the best Washington team in like what 25 years yeah long time I mean not not not nearly as recent as South Carolina's quarterback was born, but

the one who beat Tennessee. In case you missed it. The one who beat National Champion Contender, Week 2, National Championship Contender Tennessee. The one who gave Tennessee its third straight loss. But I mean, Utah might get a rematch against Washington

because they are They got to get past The Paxwell South makes no sense and I love it. It's really really fun right now. UCLA is terrible. Arizona, everyone is dead. Stanford won, by the way, Jason, just so we're clear. Oh, did Stanford get around to winning a game? Yeah, they, Christian McCaffey awoke from his slumber. He scored three road touchdowns. His, and his career road touchdowns total is now three, because I understand. My memory thing about the Pactual

South is USC's setting up 2017 hype because freshman quarterback Sam Darnold has turned this team around and is like top 10 in pass the rating all of a sudden after getting the midseason call up so prepare for top 10 USC in next year's rankings that's right they're going to finish they're going to finish like what nine and three this year maybe eight and four and then they're going to get all that hype and next year they're going to be eight and four oh my god hold on do you know who do you know who 2017 USC opens their schedule against at home. Who?

Western Michigan. I'm not even Well, there's one loss. Oh, God. Yeah, USC also plays Texas next year. So, gosh, so you're going to have to play PJ Fleck one way or the other. That's pretty exciting.

You might play him. You might play him twice. You're going to keep both of us. Yeah, he's got the energy to do it. Yeah, and they got the Notre Dame game on there, too, so make it three, shit. Yeah. The law firm of PJ and Fleck taking all the cases next year. The other notes for teams, I would, you know what, they're not, it's not a game that's going to make any difference in the national title picture.

No, it's not one that's really going to make a difference either in a Power 5 game, but it's one. that has this gift that's up on my computer. It's a yellow spandex-clad ass, just rotating over and over again with his hands blast above its head, begging for a safety. That would be live from Powder River. Wyoming.

Wyoming, a team that has been so bad, so bad, so atrocious, and has dug through such a long period of mediocrity. 22 games against ranked opponents prior to this, that they had not won. and 22 tries against ranked opponents. Four and O in conference, six and two overall after a 3028 victory over Boise State where they got one of the most satisfying football achievements possible.

They won a game on a safety. Game winning safety. Extremely Craig Ball. What? Extremely Craig Bull. Jason, book people up on the case they don't know who Craig Ball is. Craig Ball, the former Nebraska coordinator and North Dakota State head coach,

who came to Wyoming because it was basically the only FBS program comparable to North Dakota State in terms of remoteness. I don't know why, if that's why he did, but it made sense. And man, after two rough years, he has built this team up to kind of what we hopes. And it is awesome to see. Like, I know Godfrey is Wyoming is kind of his actual favorite team since he despises his alma mater, which seems to be a lot of that going around. get to them it's fine but yeah i mean i think we all have sort of a fondness for wyoming just because it's such a weirdo program um and it is cool to see man and like after

the game he he's in the uh the post game scrum fans all over the field he throws up the north dakota state hand hand sign throws it back down like oh whoops he's bobbed by fans and disappeared and this is that first time Wyoming had ever beaten boise state they were they were oh and ten all time And now they lead that division. Like, it's, it's, yeah, this was, this was my favorite win of the weekend. Absolutely. Like, just pure joy, winning by a safety, watching Wyoming, who while one of the most brutal, run first, head-down drive-blocking, you know, Paleolithic offensive schemes that you could possibly use in college football against Boise State, a great clash of styles.

In addition to that, they got to just, they got to, you know, do it on maybe my favorite end zone in college football right now, which is the Wyoming Western Panoramic end zone. It's got mountains. It's got mountains on it. It looks like a beer tank. Yeah, it almost looks like an old Oregon trail screen. It comes really close to looking like that on like an orangey and black LED monitor. role. So, I don't know. This was fun. This was one of the things

where I watched, and I was like, okay, this was a really fun weekend. I can take great joy from this, though, because... But you know, you know this wasn't the greatest joy-giving experience of the weekend. Because Boston College got a conference win,

motherfuckers. How did I know you were going someplace even dumber than where I thought you were going with that? Let's do the fuck out of this. Dudes I didn't watch this game So I can't say I mean

Why don't I watch a Boston College This is This is Uh Vine star Uh Uh Uh

Uh Uh I I couldn't say Honoring the death of Honoring the death of vine His preferred recruiting medium If you haven't looked up his

Vine account Please do that Please look up Steve Adazio Vine Um it'll give you life yeah what the only thing i will i took away from this game the aces is a very good conference i think it's probably the best conference in college football this year overall but i do like that it is still a conference where nc state can take clemson

current playoff participant prohibitively to the wire go to overtime because they miss a field goal, and in very short order, turn around and lose to a not very good Boston College team. It's still got, like, it's still got a little hint of that real ACC to it. It hasn't completely shaken that off. I like that old ACC. Five and seven ACC. Put for the gold ACC. Yeah, NC State went from like, oh, shit, this team's actually good to, oh, shit, this team.

yeah they're four and four and if you think they're going to win two games left on their schedule it means that you really really don't want good things from miami and i respect that i would also point out before we leave houston houston no snapped out of it they were down 213 to ucf they pull away Greg ward score three TD so they can pull out of that 31 24 pull out of that tailspin so Tom Herman could look extra pretty for that Texas job interview which he's undoubtedly already taken

and and the other sort of comeback come from behind Louisville Louisville yeah they had that's that's

that's all that needs to be said it's fine but they had to do that yeah I dropped you for a second so I was like I don't think they can hear me. No, no, no, we could. We just, I mean, you almost lose the UVA. It's better, it's better for you if we don't talk about it, right?

It's better if no one notices. The nicest thing we can do for Louisville is not really talk about this. I mean, Lamar Jackson got his numbers, and that's good. I think the cool thing about this for Louisville is, like, Lamar Jackson made the winning play. So it gets to be Lamar Jackson's high moment because, like, you know, he ran up all the numbers, but, like, his, like, there wasn't that single clutch play, that game-winning play. Like, he was clutch against, you know, he's clutch against Clemson and just didn't convert to a W. But, like, all of his best highlights was like, oh, look at this sick juke.

Look at this hurdle, the spin move, or whatever. There wasn't that single play that old Heisman voters would really like. Just see if you can green screen UVA out of it. Like, make it look like you're in the Avengers or something instead. Yeah, that's the thing. That's the thing. Just make it happen real fast and just like, oh, okay. game winning past.

I don't know what happened there. Against whom? I don't know. It happened too fast. Probably Virginia Tech. Probably. Not any one of like five plays that he made against Clemson, a team they lost to,

but that he looked dazzling against. Nope. No, we need one big old home run swing against the Wahoos. Good job. That and in this game, if you watch Louisville's office,

defense they're wide receivers i i they yeah they catch touchdowns they also drop them yep yeah sometimes they catch touchdowns sometimes sometimes they tip touchdowns the other way sometimes they just drop the ball completely sometimes i think next year you know he has to come back correct he's yeah he's oh he's stuck with us for another year yeah um is he so wait i assume he's going to be the person uh that we tried out our annual should so-and-so just sit out this season column for okay and the answer the answer is no because i still don't think anyone can catch a mixture i don't unless he has a car accident on the field which innovative strategies well he might be full of them bobby petrino might be driving a motorcycle down the middle of the field

you never know but pop john might be doing burnouts with the camero lose like luckily bobby will be at the u sc jobs you'll be safe that's true just has to worry about john schnatter oh so bobby Petrino is going to lose to Western Michigan. Cool. Yeah, I got to institute some new systems, man. PJs just going to come in and they're all on the same page. Remember, it's a team sport, not an individual one. We've got 22 men who all know what they're doing. You row that boat together, son. Oh, my God, he's infectious. He's inside. He's inside you.

Yes. He's inside all of us. It's like inner space. Your boat has been roan. He's in the suit. He's in my suit. He's inflexious. He's, oh, God.