Shutdown Fullcast - Shutdown Fullcast 4.62 - The Worst Super Bowl Episode Possible

Episode Date: January 26, 2017

Other than Jim Harbaugh Things, which are always happening because they can't not happen, the college football world is pretty quiet for the time being. Fortunately, there's the Super Bowl! Which we don't really talk about that much, other than to spread a few lies about Boston. There are also questions about regional food because that's the main thing this podcast is about. Again, we're not sure why you listen to it in the first place. Or why we make it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to the shutdown fullcast. Ah, we're in the booth today, live in New York City. It's so cramped. I hate it. I'm going to take a selfie right now as we're talking of how bad this is because you have to understand we're in a dark booth that I think is about three by three by three. It's pretty close, yeah. And probably about seven feet in height.

Yeah. I'm guessing because there's really not a whole lot of room in here. And Ryan and I both, we're American size. Imagine there was... Are you about 240 right now? No, I'm not that big. Jesus. You're thick. I don't know. Maybe your bones are heavy, man.

This episode has already gotten up to a terrible start. But yeah, imagine a chubby... Because I'm about 2.35 right now. Right, right, right. This is a compliment from Spencer. I know. By the way. What is your weight?

Is it higher? That's good. Imagine a chubby, hairy, sweaty, Dr. Hu episode. And that's what this is. Yeah, that's what we're looking at here. You may not even be able to get light in here. I think we could do it. Oh, yeah, no, this is really bad.

We're extremely, we're extremely cramped in here. And that's a terrible photo. Good, good. So we're getting off to a great start for the forecast Ryan and I are cramped together. Hearing that while also looking up and seeing like trees swaying in the breeze. That's great. Things are better down here. Yeah, Jason Kirk.

I got a look at my life if a person who I think likes me and is a friend is like, yeah, you run two 40 right? God damn. No, no, that's a good thing. Ryan's proportionally like, you know, T-H-I-C-C, you're a thick dude. You're like full-back size. I'm like a black hole. Yeah, right? So I'm just thinking,

I'm like, he probably weighs more than me. It's just dark matter. I'm just, you know, I'm guessing. I'm kind of a slight 235. See, if when Spencer gives you a high number, that means you have a lot of power. Oh, wait, hold on. I'm going to turn this around. I'm going to focus on the positive here.

This is the last episode. with Spencer and I on the shutdown forecast at all. Congratulations, Jason. Yeah, it's your show now. The only host going forward. We took a poll. We said you could kick off me or Spencer or both me and Spencer and overwhelmingly people pick both me and Spencer.

So what we're going to do is we're just going to shut that door and everyone outside of that door is now on this show. There will be no more Gator Talk. And also the show is canceled. Cool. So just to be clear Everybody not on this show So Clay Travis is on this show now

Yep, me and Clay Cool You and Clay Just dealing with all those Just those PC Bromani's I think a podcast With you Clay Travis and Bomani Jones I don't think Jason gets to say a word

I'm going to do a podcast where all I do is accuse other people of being the things you're insecure about And we're going to make billions Cool Right That's why you called me 240. Dude, I'm envious.

If I could be a solid 240, that'd be great. Instead, I got to be like a chick-fil-A 240. It's not a good cleaning 240. A peanut oil 240. Yeah, it's a peanut oil 240. Yeah, it's a cheap carb 240. You don't want that. Oh, oh, waffle fry 240.

Exactly. You look like a bunch of gym, like at 240, I'd look like a bunch of gymnastic foam blocks stuffed into a garbage bag. It's not good. what is that moving assembly of kickboards doing exactly this is a compliment my brother um did anything happen this week in college football let's see we did have jim harbaugh going to roam yeah which i'm very fond of yeah but that's not even the first jim harbaugh story we wanted to talk about right because jim harbaugh more recently i don't know the circumstances of why or how but that's true of

almost every Jim Harbaugh story, so let's just assume that that's the preface. He decided to meet up with the guy who hit him with his car when Jim Harbaugh was like in grades full, like a six-year-old or something, and just took a picture with him just to be like, hey, this is me and the guy who I darted out in the road and he hit me. Here we are. We're buddies. So is this Jim Harbaugh's super villain origin story? Like, is this where he got everything that's wrong with him that has made him who he is? I guess so Like Spider-Man was bitten by a spider now as spider powers

This is why Jim Arr- What did the accident do here? What did the car give him? Well, it turned him into a car, man. All he does is go. Yeah, but I think it, yeah, all he does is go. I think it had to be hit with a muscle car, right? So he's probably infused with the spirit of,

I want to say a slightly faulty one. Sure. Not even a muscle car. Let's go like AMC Gremlin, right? It had like, you know, 400 horsepower, but it was all in the back wheels so you couldn't keep it on the road. That's Harbaugh, right there, gave him the superpowers. And I guess milk is the human equivalent of gasoline.

Mm-hmm. So that tracks. An obsolete fuel that no one should really use. Something that's really, really good and solid for about 11 weeks. And then that 12th week just, oh, shit, just all falls apart. That's like any road trip. Yeah, that's, I also like this because it's Jim Harbaugh competing. That's all it is.

Jim Harbaugh is not going to have an enemy because that would mean losing, right? Right. He's winning in every social interaction. Like, he's probably, he's probably friends with Aaron Rogers family. Oh, yeah. Just to show Aaron Rogers that he can be better at it than he is. I bet Shelley Meyer loves him. He's like, man, Jim Harbaugh's the best.

And Urban's like, oh, one zero. Who are you? Why are you here at my office? He's not even remotely crazy like my husband. No, it's very different. Yeah, no. Yeah, he's a little bit different, John. I would also state that if you go at Jim Harbaugh on Twitter and you go like super hard,

he's going to show up at your house in six weeks like, hey, buddy, let's talk about this. I thought we could spend some time together. Yeah, you want to throw the ball around a little bit, run a route? I'll show you how to run an in-cut. And you'll be like, yeah, man, I called you a homosexual slur on Twitter, but you can teach me how to do this in-cut. It'll be great. Six minutes later, you're going to be best friends, and guess what?

Jim Harbaal wins again. That's a W. Life is constant recruiting. All it is is recruiting. That's what it is. It's constant recruiting. This is a, this man who hit him with his car that was initially saying, no, I'm not interested. And Jim Harbaugh didn't give up on the recruiting trail.

It took decades, but he got, he got him to sign the letter of friendship intent, which I guarantee you, Jim Harbaugh has people sign letters of friendship intent. Oh, this is why he's exhausting. There's going to be a feature story about what. he eventually wears that as welcome somewhere, and it will reference people who are randomly accosted by him via social media contact who are like, yeah, it came to my house. And then he came like three weeks later at like 4 a.m.

and was like, how, let's go for a run. Come on. Meet me in Temecula. I reserved a tennis court. Yeah, it'd be done with all sort of like non-contact sports. Yeah, we're going to work on your backhand. Yeah. Come on, let's go play shuffleboard.

I'm really good at it. But yeah, that's the only thing that happened in college. football this week. Well, that and going to Rome. That in Rome. And Oregon had more assistant coach shenanigans. Florida can't recruit at all. It's good. But again, we won't talk about that in future episodes because Jason won't talk about Florida football. We'll talk about the recruiting being shitty. That's fine. That's fine. I guess we can talk about Florida football, everything about Florida football except the football. Yeah. We're okay with that. Because, you know, this, this podcast says if there's one complaint we've gotten, it's that it's too much Florida X's and O's.

Way much. Yeah. You know? Too much playbook knowledge. Florida football. Definitively better than Iowa football. It's just too goddamn esoteric. Oh, I do want to add one more Florida-ish update.

I have been contacted by the good people at Outback Steakhouse. I don't know what's going to happen. It's very preliminary. But as of now, that line of communication has been established. Hashtag Friand Nanny. Frienne Nanny. Hashtag Friand Nanny. I will also say this.

When I talked to them, they were like, hey, we really appreciated how enthusiastic you are about the bloom and onion costume. And they also mentioned our colleague, Richard Johnson, who wrote a story about how in Gainesville, they ran out of free bloomin onions. They were like, yeah, it was great to see all this excitement about the Outback Bowl. And I was like, mm-hmm. Yep. That's exactly. Definitely do not. You did not listen to the shutdown forecast episode about your bowl.

game and I thank you for that. That's great. You have diagnosed and summed up the exact description of how we feel about this bowl. Yep. That and I do want to go over the if we are taking recruiting overseas I would like to go over the programs

and the places that I believe they would visit. Okay. Because Rome's really a Michigan pick, right? Oh, Rome is the perfect Michigan pick because the Michigan is basically a public ivy crowd can be like, yes, all the culture in history and education and blah-b-b-de-blah.

Exactly. Right. It was a lot better a long time ago. There is that. Damn that split title with Greece. Oh, man. Don't you remember with the Gauls? The Gauls coming in.

I mean, the difference is Rome successfully defeated the elephant team. I was trying to figure out how to do that. You did it, Ryan. man that is a hell of a pivot that is amazing all right but who else you got well i think that if we're going to take other teams on the road and if this is a recruiting chip and i believe it is arkansas's going straight to cancun baby like they're just not even like they might try to be like oh we'll go to chichinica we'll go look at some temples in the jungle or whatever meanwhile in his brain all brett's here and it's taking them boys to hooters

they're just not going to get very far is what it is like the map is all plotted out but i think we'll just park it right here yeah it's good i mean this is an artifact isn't it look let's just uh let's just tie the boat up right here see what we can we see where we can explore local culture just no shame just go for it ls u i think they're going to exploit some of those cultural ties right uh they're they'll they'll say oh they'll go to paris right no no no we're going to st martin It's French. It's French-ish.

Ish? Yeah. Not St. Martin, but St. Martin. Yeah. Yeah, so they're going to go to St. Martin, right? Because that's definitely a cultural occurrence for them. Yep. Right?

Yep. I believe that USC. Ooh. Yeah. They're Trojans, right? Okay. Right. So you think they're going to Greece?

No, no, they're just going to wife. Okay. They're just going to look on it. Okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. they're already that close why not right like yeah we'll go to tahiti they're trojans right that starts with a t we can do that and i think that boston college they'll probably go someplace

really miserable that's that that would be the thing for me right they'll go to barrow yeah they'll go to barrow at the exact wrong time iceland at the worst possible time right yeah like let's take the boys someplace fun like wreckivik in january that's like that's like mid volcano right iceland at the worst time. Right. Dude's being volcanoes, being seasonal effective disorder. I really want to see the program that tries, like, I want to see Rutgers try this, and they accidentally, it ends up being like when Cuban baseball players used to come to

the U.S. and they defect. Rutgers would be like, yeah, we're down a couple wide receivers. They live in Belgium now. They said it's better there. Rutgers just goes to JMU. They're really good at soccer. It's amazing.

We lost a couple into a third division finish team. I want to know the ones that'll take this seriously and get it totally wrong because, you know, Michigan, sure, they'll do some educational value, right? But they're just going to have a good time. Be frank. Northwestern will do this wrong. Yeah, they're going to a country where you can drink when you're 18 and get cheap pizza wherever. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. So the idea of this is you go somewhere far away that's a lot better place.

Mm-hmm. So Northwestern is going to go all the way to Chicago. Yeah. Wow. Have you guys ever been over here? That's a western Michigan town. That's crazy talk. It's amazing.

Northwestern will get it wrong. I also feel confident that the University of Florida, given its current trajectory, will get it wrong. FSU won't go because they're scared of it. They're scared of foreigners. That's it. Why'd we go anywhere else? The USA is fine.

Here's what's happening. I was going to say Paul Johnson is going to take Georgia Tech to Atlanta. Wherever Florida goes, they will book the tickets. They will be non-refundable. And then somebody will say, wait. There's not like a CIA travel advisory for that country, is there? Oh, oh, shit. Oh, shit.

Wait, we're going to rural Turkey close to the Syrian border? Good news. We lost that four-star cornerback, but we got Zika. Yeah, we literally lost him. And Mike Leach seeing all this going on and realizing he has to trump everybody else and, like, man, he's going to go somewhere really fucking dangerous. Very honest trench. What do you bet they've been doing that for years anyway, right? And we just don't know about it.

We'll hear about a player, like Luke Falk will go, yeah, that's weird. We went to Rome nine years ago. Where'd you go this time? Well, it's funny. We went out to British Columbia, the survivalist camp. Yeah, we've been practicing on the India-Pakistan border. It's crazy.

Jammu Kashmir. It's like the Pullman of the subcontinent. It's nutty. So that's pretty much everything that actually happened in college football. we were going to answer some reader questions this week, five days short of signing day, where remember, Florida's definitely not being out-recruited by everybody. Texas.

Actually, Texas is below Florida at this point. So, yeah, that doesn't really mean as much as it used to. Well, I mean, they're both operating with new coaches. Yeah, well, actually, we're, yeah, this is your, it's going to be your four. God, Jason's edition of this podcast, I'm going to be, I'm going to. subscribe like i don't listen to this podcast now i will once we're not on it yeah i'm sorry year three i just lose track they're all the same so many memories just piling up just piling up it's amazing um jason please save us with a question um let's see what's the boston of the south that's from

dylan bishop on twitter nashville no it's not nashville this would be the city that doesn't have very many people, but somehow is treated as, like, this massive cultural center. Charleston. Yes, Charleston. Because you also need the, like, double-dipped-in-history element to it. And I think Charleston probably fits that more accurately than that. Also, you're going to need nasty ocean food. Okay, sure.

True. Kind of overrated ocean food for the most part, right? Racism? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I got that, really. There's a minor league baseball team in both, I think. True. Yep, true.

Overrepresented for its size. Oh, definitely, definitely. Ridiculous accent, check. Like, you can't be serious. Accent? Yeah, like, Charleston's one of those places where if you're actually from there and you actually have that accent, you walk in the room and people are like, is he drunk? How are you doing?

You're like, listen, I'm Southern, but that's a step too far from me, dude. Not places you should go for coffee? Definitely not places you should go for coffee, no. It's trash. So that's it. I think we've sewn it up. Also, kind of unbearable weather. Like, it's really low-key.

People are like, oh, man, Boston, the weather sucks. You ever been to Charleston in July? Ooh. Yeah, they're like, that's by the coast. Yeah. The coast is now in your crutch. Yeah, you wouldn't really know it. You're like, do you like reedy swamps?

Oh, the reedy swamps. So yes, Charleston is the Boston of the South. We did it. That was easy. Next. Are y'all looking at these or am I? I got one. It's from our good friend, Joshua V. Black.

Once met stone cold and a wind dixie buying dip. I hope he's talking about chips and dip. Because that's funnier I love the French onion Exactly like I'm going to a party Cracks Cracks the like sour cream together

You guys like mild or medium I got both Yeah mild I got mild Koso And he walks I'm going to say something About mild Keso

316 calories a serving That's somebody standing by the table of snacks and goes do we have any dip he just walks in and you know it's like I brought dip okay so

what's the weirdest I got Arby sauce what what? What's the I and then I picked up some more horsey sauce so Matt

Met probably doesn't qualify because I did not talk to her because when you live in New York you do see famous people and the unspoken rules you don't talk to famous people but I was at Trader Joe's years ago and I saw Molly Shannon

formerly of Saturday Night Live in this Trader Joe's and she was looking at hummus and she was wearing a bright red raincoat and a bright red rain hat and it was very confusing because I was like you wouldn't wear that if you wanted to be unnoticed

but there she was I said nothing to her and I moved on that's the new york thing to do right yes yeah just to barely even notice to acknowledge to yeah i mean acknowledging the existence of another person in this city opens you up to possibly having to have any meaningful relationship with them in any way and that cannot happen it's wild man first time you go to new york you're like wow i'm i'm actually a really friendly person because like everyone here seems like an asshole compared to me i thought i was a dick but I'm actually not.

Well, it's, it's not open hostility. No, no, no, it's just, it's like you're walking through a, like, it's like a bunch of ghosts walking past each of. Yes, it's, it's mutual disregard. It's just mutual disregard. Ghosts sprinting past each other. If you actually need help, I think people who live here are more than willing to provide it. If you are looking for conversation, you should leave.

So that, that is probably the opposite, uh, the difference between the town like there and like here, Whereas here, it's like, hey, hey, y'all, how you do? You know, everybody's got something to say. But if it's like, oh, shit, my legs broke, help. Can't hear you. Got a tea time. Later, y'all. So we're bullshit nice, whereas New York is no recognition whatsoever unless absolutely necessary.

I think people here are just loud, nice. Like, I saw somebody yesterday had a woman had dropped her bag, and I watched somebody run a whole block. Yeah. to give her a bag. But when he got there, it was this. Hey, lady, you dropped your bag! And she's like, thank you!

It's because we're not used to talking to one another. It just feels so foreign. It did. It was great to watch though, because I'm like, this is a heartwarming moment of human interaction, and it's happening at 78 decibels each way. Yeah, it's like when you're speaking to somebody who you don't, you know when you talk to somebody who you don't think they understand English

and so you just get louder? It's the exact same thing. I also think it's territory, it's range finding, right? Like, you've got to stay five feet back. I'm going to extend the hand forward with the bag. Yeah, little known fact. We echo locate. Yeah.

They're like bats wearing black. Do you have a famous person? I do. I do. It's not the weirdest place to see a famous person, but the degree of interaction and how it happened was my favorite because it was in Las Vegas and it was at the Palazas. There is a Lamborghini dealership at the bottom of the Palazzo, and then a tremendous escalator that goes, I believe, three or four floors up to the floor of the casino. Or to the lobby, I forget where.

But Mario Vitale has a restaurant in Palazzo, or at least he did. And I think he was getting it set up. I'm on the way up from the Lamborghini dealership where I was buying a car. Yep. Blog live. Yeah. In case they don't get it, by the way, they have an enormous horny-looking ball. whole statue, right, at the bottom.

Like, as if your masculinity wasn't projected enough, right, and theatrical enough at the Lamborghini dealership. They have this giant bowl with huge balls out in front, like, brr, penis. That's what you're looking at when you go to the Lambo. So I was going on the way up the escalator, and on the way down was Mario Battali. And I will tell you, there is no one on the planet that looks more like Mario Batali than Mario Battali, right? There are some celebrities who you go, ah, it could be this person.

Or it could be that person. There are certain celebrities who look very different in person than they do in real life. And Mario Battali, because I've also seen him on the street, looks exactly like you think he does. Correct. He's discreet. He's not nondescript. He is a very descript-looking person, right?

Shock orange hair. It's not red. Pull back in a ponytail. It's thin up top. He looks smug as fuck. Nobody looks happier to be himself than Mario Battelli. He's probably wearing some sort of fleece vest. Correct.

He was wearing a fleece vest, even though it was one tan outside. with a dress shirt underneath. Orange crocks. He had on a pair of orange crocs. So he's coming down the escalator, and you can see the orange crox because he's coming all the way down. And I look, and I'm not cool about this, right?

I looked at him, and I kind of looked off. And then I was like, no, no, no, he can deal with this. I looked at it, and I went, and it held up a finger. You can't see I'm doing this, but I held up an index finger, and I was like, that's you, right? Which is it technically true?

Anybody can answer that in the affirmative. There's a really dumb way to ask a question. Yes, this is my corporeal form. Right. I agree. Keep in mind, we're both moving at the same time, which gives it this nice old narrative, right? Moving in opposite directions.

So I have to turn my head around for him to, because I ask this right as he's passing. And he looks at... This is a cut scene from a Wes Anderson film. Correct. And he looks up at me with like the smuggest goddamn look on his face, holds up a hand with the palm facing himself. Right, right.

Like he's... Like an Italian giving you what for. Right. Like he's taking a picture of himself. Correct. Like he's holding the phone, the invisible phone in his hand. And he gestures a little bit forward and backward, right? As if going, hey. And he goes, he goes, yeah. And he looked so thrilled to be himself. Yeah.

And I was like, God, that's a life lesson. If you could just be as completely content in being yourself as Mario Battaglio. Hey, you know what? I am fucking me. He's like, he just looked like fat and glorious. And he probably drank like eight balls of wine the night before and ate like 5,000 calories. And wow, you looked radiant. So that's my, that's my weirdest place I met a celebrity, which is on an escalator going the other way while asking them. Is that you?

Oh, I do have another one that I thought of. Hmm. So a off-Broadway show that my wife worked on at the time had a rap party where they invited all the cast members who had ever been on the thing. to a party at a bar, a two-story bar. And one of the women who was on the show at one point was Lala. And so Carmelo Anthony was at this rat party. And he stood out like a sore thumb because he was the only athlete there. And he was definitely the only like six, nine guy there.

And Carmelo Anthony, have you ever been to a social event with your significant other that you are, it's not for you? You just are there to accompany. and he had, you know, Carmelo Anthony is a fabulously wealthy, accomplished person, but all he could do was slump over the rail on the balcony of the second floor with his chin in his hand and look at a Yankees game bored. They're just as miserable as we are. Yeah, yeah, it was good. It was very good. I want to get this Boston Slander amped up.

Okay. Jason. Well, hang on. Hang on here. Let me. So I met Buff Bagwell at a Waffle House. Oh, I can't forget this. Yeah, go ahead.

In Atlanta, obviously, meeting people at Waffle House, that's nothing. But this one is pretty special. It was about 3 a.m. And he'd been out. He'd been out that night. And he's apparently an avid motorcyclist. It was at the time. He had, like, helmet with sticker with, like, the big.

fell off one of those stickers on it yeah um he was there by himself so i'm just going to assume he was in between gatherings um and we were there i think this was still high school and one of our friends who was like a uh defecting FBI agent he was kind of like on the way out of the bureau so he was planning on some mischief and he was trying to get us in on all these like epic pranks like oh we're going to rerout all the stop signs from wherever to wherever and like stuff like that and we tried to get Buff Bagwell in on that but he didn't want to. Also met Little John there one time

and the answer to the question turned down for what is lots of stuff because he's very, very quiet subdued, normal. Not a very large man. It's just extremely normal guy. His name is Little John

and so. That's true. It's not big John. Yeah, that's it for me. Okay. You want to drag Boston now? yeah it's time it's time for some boston slander because we do have one falcons fan i'm aware of the falcons that's my official stance yeah i practice falcons awareness i'm aware that they exist yeah if if you were forced at gunpoint to pick an NFL team who are you going with he's going Jags death I don't

I don't need to waste my time like that if you're if someone you love was at gunpoint and you were forced to pick it in the field team let's talk about how much i love this person a time bomb has been strapped to a baby are we talking about yeah are we talking about nephew love are we talking about uncle love because if it's an uncle up there in law i don't know um if i had to pick a team i want somebody who i can give up on after the first two weeks so i could do something else so yeah the jags i'd pick i pick the jags and then i'd just be like oh look they're losing whatever right Because I was like, the closest I ever got to becoming an NFL fan was being a Bucks fan around 97 through 99.

Okay. Yeah, the Derek Brooks, John Lynch. Right. A lot of Bucks fans on here. That's fine. That was the closest I came, and I never quite sealed the deal in terms of actually becoming emotionally devoted to them,

which was a good idea because they went in the tank forever after that. After they won the Super Bowl. After they won the Super Bowl, it's just trash, right? They were like, yeah, we did it once, y'all. It was like losing weight, right? See, I showed you, I could. It's like your friend who loses 45 pounds. They're like, yeah, looking lean, boys.

I had to order a sandwich. Take a lot of pictures right now. Hurry. I got clean. Yeah. It's not going to stick, but I showed you I could. That's good a pizza. The journey is half the battle.

Back to heroin. That is as close as I got. But if I had to pick a team, the Jags, because they require the least effort, because the same thing's going to happen every time. They're just going to suck and be awful. Or the Browns. Like you don't even have to watch the Browns. You just have to get on social media and go, oh, Browns! And then you don't watch the games.

Well, if we're setting aside the teams and all that, there's at least somewhere in your cold dead soul, some fraction of local pride at stake in this Super Bowl. That much I can confidently say. I will say that in this clash of cultures, I am firmly on team Atlanta. That's it. I'm actually just in it just to ride for Atlanta. That's it, because Atlanta, of course, represents so many positive qualities that Boston lacks. And we'll never have. For instance, we have culture.

That's one thing Atlanta has, correct? We have a music scene and have had for decades. That's cool. Boston has a band called literally Boston. Sure. And Aerosmith. And the pixies, there. So, I mean, I'm out.

Well, it's it. We summed up Boston music. There you go. I got that. Oh, and you got that Boston actually hasn't. We're just going to drop Boston facts on you. Right. Boston hasn't released a new song since shipping up to Boston.

They just stopped. That's it. Sounds right. Every, every radio station just plays that all day long. If you could imagine anything funnier than that played 50 times. Do you know how hard I would laugh. I listened that 49 times. And then I heard, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.

So there's that. There's pride in their local sports teams, right? Because they went a lot of championships, which, yeah, I think you can take personal pride in that. I think that's a good substitute for personal achievement. Sure. Sure. Atlanta, we're past that. We don't need the validation of the championship for our lifestyle.

We are, yeah, we're post championships. Who are the best brothers associated with Atlanta? The best brothers? Yeah. The best twins associated with Atlanta are the In Yang twins. See, again, we're beyond brothers because Migos, They're like cousins and uncles and stuff. I mean, that's way better than the Afflex, right?

Yeah. Oh, listen, as far as I know, no one in Migos has actually been accused of several things. Well, fair. They've confessed to several things on record. And the Ginging Twins would have made a much better Batman v. Superman movie. I mean, the only thing wrong than Migos ever did was go to Valdosta, right? Statesboro. That's what it was.

State Sparrow. Yeah, you just got to stay out of State Sparrow. Statesboro is the Boston of Georgia. Yeah. Never, never go back to Statesboro. That's true. Remember, they win championships, too, in Statesboro. Never go anywhere where their teams win games.

I want to divert, by the way, the other piece of Boston slanders is this. I've never been there. I don't actually know. Like, you can make up things. It's fine. They have a problem with polydacly. That's right, yep. It's a frequent problem with polydactly.

I've heard that. Yeah, their politicians lose elections. It's my favorite thing. My grandmother, my Southern Democrat grandmother, going, y'all got to lose another election. Listen it into those Yankees. God damn it. I do think if you have it, the dollop, the podcast The Dollop, has a good two-part episode on the Boston busing riots.

Yeah. That's good. That ever happened in Atlanta? No, that didn't happen in Atlanta. It's not flattering. That's true. That's good. Oh, also our talk radio hosts only make jokes about paralyzed saints players.

They don't actually harass African American and female sports writers online exclusively. So that's pretty good. We just try to have a conversation. You just come and defend yourself. You wrote something. You wrote words and therefore we are entitled to scream at you. I'm owed an explanation. Yeah.

Just know that. This is the difference between Atlanta Sports Radio and Boston Sports Radio. It's an entirely different brand of deplorable across the board. We fired those assholes. Kind of. I think two of them still have jobs. Where's Mike Bell? I don't know.

It's temporary. It's best not to look. We like stage fired them, right? You're fired! I mean, you, sir. Sports radio morality is probably the worst way to compare anything. Yeah, I mean, I don't listen to any of it, but I'm pretty confident we're not as objectionable. The question I would like to ask and answer here comes from Spencer M.

what's the worst regional food you've ever eaten the worst regional food so besides in and out um it had to be something midwestern or or northeastern right i don't know i mean there's some kind of rank we make fun of skyline chili a lot but skyline chili is very much not good i don't understand why it exists i wouldn't make now i'm by the as a blanket i wouldn't make fun of midwestern food because you can get some you can get some solid Oh, sure. Oh, sure. I'll tear down a Bob Evans, just like anybody will. Colvers is good. I enjoy Culvers. Colvers is spreading into the south, if that tells you anything. Yeah. I'll pretty much all of that like north, like what I would call northwestern camping food. Right? Like when you go to Minnesota and you go camping and they're like, guess what, boys, it's just like jam and jerky for days. Like that's, that's delicious. That's fine. Okay, I'll take the Midwest off the table. Let's go back to the northeast then. I'll put a rogue southeastern one in there, okay, because there's a couple of nasty southern specialties that I escape me.

Go ahead. Yeah, we'll eat any part of a pig. It's true, but, man, like, I don't know why you'd ever be proud of pomella cheese. I don't know. Yeah, but you hate all cheese. Yeah, but like that idea in particular, just I don't get that in sweet tea. I do not understand why people are proud of it. I'm just like, cool, that's awesome.

You got, like, bad milk on a spread, and you've got diabetes. the glass. So the thing about pomeino cheese, it's not that it's like it's cheese. Explain it to me. Like, no, no, no. I have nothing good to say about it. I'm just sort of, I'm sort of explaining your side a little bit because I think I understand. It's not just that it's cheese

or that it's especially terrible cheese. It's that people make such a big fucking deal out of it. Like it's this cultural staple. Yeah, like, cheese. Man, I'm not going to play identity politics with the spread. I got to put it on something larger. You know, like fried chicken. That's fine.

I'll fight over fried chicken but like a spread don't tell me that's a big deal or a mint julep it's the mint julep of cheese this is kind of in line with sweet tea but like chess pie or any of those pies that are like

hey what if it was pecan pie but with just the sugar oh yeah it's trash yeah I hate that shit I think it's fucking awful it's a low effort food yeah it's like no I I'd rather not just eat corn syrup

served with crust but thank you. Yeah. That's very kind of you. I guess the thing about the South is there's nothing terrible that we all like. You know what I mean? I mean, sweet tea is the closest.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Well, I mean, even sweet tea is just like, it's, it's candy. It's not bad. It's just. Also, I feel like, I feel like sweet tea is like your entry-level southerner kit thing, right? Like, I love my sweet tea and my guns. Like, that's, come on.

Yeah, make a big show of like, I'll have a glass of tea, sweet or unsweet. What do you? you mean you grow up in new hampshire yeah no sir no son this is not some larry the cable guy bullshit hell no i'm not forgetting the the the ultimate actually i am a southerner thing is like in like intentionally calling every soda coke like okay yeah your granddad did we all thought that was hilarious you know that's fucking mellow yellow you don't have to pretend you habitually call everything in a can Coke. Yeah. Don't act aghast when you're like,

RC! RC's actually low-key, like, that's your subtle, like, I'm super Southern pick if you're like, no, man. So, like, I mean, I have the bad habit of when I hear is Pepsi okay saying, like, sure, I know, I'll come to that. But like, I'll do that. All brown things in cans aren't either Coke or bad. For one, tab fucking rules.

Agreed. All right, so this is the second most strong stance you've ever taken on this podcast. I like this passion. So I have strong opinions about like four things, which are cheap food rap albums.

Fuck how am I the one who's 240? Like a few football things, not most. Never like, who's the best team. Nothing like that. So three things, yeah. Actually, probably my daughter's probably got me some strong Star Wars and Pokemon opinions by now. So there we go.

Oh yeah, there was a new Star Wars title. oh yeah it broke the naming convention and it's got a different color too well i just people are all worked up because it's called the last jetti but i'm like if we were all out to dinner and i said oh is it cool if i have the last pizza slice you wouldn't think like is it the last one ever actually i'm drax of the destroyer i do actually think that so i got a that joke went over your head i'm too fast

Ryan, you're saying this is the last Jedi at this Stevie Bees. Right, exactly. Correct. This C.C.'s pizza advertises this last Jedi here. But it's late 10 minutes, there will be more. We got the Midichlorian detectors are at the other Stevie Bees. Yeah. Correct.

I will also state that for worse regional food, the most mishandled food, I'm going to go back to a little bit of New England slander. The lobster roll is the most overrated. The problem is that. It's a hot dog bun. Lobster rolls are very... I think lobster rolls done well are very tasty.

They're great if you actually season them. But... Lobster is trash, first of all. Whoa. When you have to pay $18 for it... $18 for lump lobster meat and a hot dog bun that doesn't have anything on it. Yeah, it's not great.

Does Ballute count as a regional food? What's that? Do you really not know? Ballute. Ballute is a southeast Asian street food that is a fetal duck egg. The duck inside is allowed to mature to the point where it has no bones, but it does sometimes have a beak and some feathers. And then it is hard-boiled, and you eat it like a hard-boiled egg. I mean, if you're using the broadest possible definition of regional food, I've had it.

So have I. Yeah. So did you like it? I think it tasted fine. It is very psychologically traumatized. So it's, so it's, it's poultry and egg at the same time? Yes, it's chicken and a biscuit. Man, that's like a fifth of a Waffle House meal.

Sure, that sounds fine. Yeah, no, I mean, I'm okay with it. I will state, though, it's psychologically difficult. It's not, I don't want to go as far as traumatizing, but it is a complex thing intellectually to process. It is, it is, I think, I think veganism would be much more successful if they were like, here, have balut. Tell me how you feel like.

Or if you actually had to like slaughter an animal, like when you do it, you're like, oh, this is horrible. Oh, my God, there's a lot of blood of these. Like a lot of blood. That knows what's happening. This is, it's bad. So yeah, balut and sweet tea. Those are the two.

Snacks of the future in Brooklyn. What a meal.