Shutdown Fullcast - Shutdown Fullcast 7.26 - Mississippi State Enters The Rancor Pit

Episode Date: September 25, 2017

Florida superfan Jason Kirk joins the podcast this week to explain how the Gators had that game in hand the whole time, don't even worry about it, we gaze upon the destruction that was Vanderbilt football, Clemson won't show you the play by play against Boston College unless you produce a warrant, Bret Bielema ends up nude in a McDonald's Playplace, and YUP FLORIDA STATE SURE DOES HAVE AS MANY WINS AS UMASS DOES. (Though we're pretty sure they'd beat Tennessee.) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to the shutdown forecast. Man, you know, it's an exciting week in college football when we do a recap and we can guarantee you a couple of things. One, we're going to talk about TCU. That's right. Get your finger on the pulse of a nation when you say, definitely, folks, we're going to talk about TCU. And we should. Like, I don't know. I kind of feel like we're making fun of them a little bit for being TCU.

Nope. Nope. You whooped ass. If you up to ass, we get to leave. with you. Additionally, we're actually going to talk about, we're going to talk about my favorite team and Ryan's favorite team. Virginia. Virginia football are the good old orange and blue wahoo wah, the calves just looking confident with a program going in a new direction. We are all about UVA here on this program. Now, after the calves, did you run out of Virginia stuff that you know?

Yes. No, wait, I said, why. That's got to count for something. Yeah, yeah, you got to like three things. I mean, I can't imagine how many more there are. Tiki Barber. Tiki Barber and Ronde Barber. Herman Moore in the house.

Okay, we did it. Defensive basketball. Racist founding fathers. Yeah, racist, racist graduates. Who all work for the National Review. Something like that. U.S. But we can talk about UVA briefly, can't we?

Because they, they beat the shit out of Boise State. Yo, they put a, they put, they put, they put some cruelty. They put hard time on Boise State, okay? They put serious hard times on Boise State. You can't give them hard times. Virginia, Virginia ain't dusty roads. They went up there and they put the Irwin R. Scheister on them. Can I, they put the audit on them?

They put the audit on him. They really did, though. I will say this. I think what all UVA needed, all right, to get right as a program was this. They needed the kind of underrated, like, simple cruelty that only a Mormon coach can bring. This is like, oh, I'm a very nice non-Mormant. And then they get on the football field and you're like, oh, my God, the meanest people on the planet. That's right.

Bronco Mendenhall took that all with him. listen we're not mean we're not mean we just don't think you should be allowed to rush for anything at all nothing ever in addition to that and that's our belief that's and that's religious freedom you can't prevent that you didn't want to be kicked in the nuts to show wear looser your pants and in addition to that they got a transfer of quarterback from east carolina named kurt banker who's covered in tattoos that's all uva needed they just needed a dude with a ton of tattoos. Listen, that's it.

All I know is you go to ECU because you want to play on Sundays and Yukon. Undefeated on Sundays. Undefeated on Sundays. And not just this year. Like, it's actual, like, you go back and look and like, oh, they played a ball on Sunday one year. And like, oh, they've done, like, yeah, ECU wins games on Sundays. Big time. And if we can talk about other people that we're going to definitely talk about tonight,

we're definitely going to talk about it feels so weird I can't even say it Georgia yeah yeah yeah let's talk about Georgia we you know we honestly won't have to talk about them all that long

because I did not watch much of that game so it was like okay and it's decided got it I got the picture got it it's sort of like what that game was sort of like what the rancor pit usually is like when you just throw a regular folk in there, not a Jedi. Just like, all right, let's see if he can and the Rancor bid him in half. Cool.

Good job Rancor. Damn good Rancor. We really should space out our entertainment a little bit better here at this deserted desert palace. I think you just called Nick Sabin a Jedi. He probably, I mean, he's a dark Jedi. He's Sith. He's Sith as hell.

Yeah, the Emperor's pretty short. It is true. He's short. and he probably eats the same thing for lunch every day too. He's also oversigned at one point. He had multiple apprentices, which are not. Hey, man, you can't, you can only have the one. Listen, I'm gray shirt in this one.

He was constantly trying to boot one of these apprentices off to Ojuco and, and upgrade him to another one. And he was always sort of badmouthed, you know, he's always sort of badmouthed him, the apprentices being like, whistling. Hey, no, there's, there's playing time here available. that's true and his apprentices generally don't do real well when they leave him oh oh there's there's there's good in you jim macklewain i believe it well mushchamp lost his legs and regained them as robots and spent the next 10 years

chasing obiwine canobi through the east before finally finding him and being struck down in the middle of the desert and probably much of him story i was going to say it probably getting his legs cut off again, right? Yeah, yeah. See, Obi-Wan just didn't want to play in the SEC championship. That was brilliant. Nah, just go ahead. Kill me now.

He is wise. That is, whenever you see Barrymore on the schedule, that's when you hit him with the strike me down, and I will be more, I'll be more powerful. That's true. We're for Florida, right? Hey, kick our ass in the SEC title game. Guess what?

We're going to paste Iowa. Guess what? Guess what? Do they just have to do it again next year. And then when, and then when you, You know, when young Darth Vader kills all the, the younglings, the kids. Yeah, that's Vanderbilt. Oh, oh, Vandee.

Real sad, real, real, real sad, but pretty quick and doesn't really take place on camera. So it's fine. And like, and so over the top of cartoonish that it's like, all right, this, I'm not even, I'm not even really getting this as like a heel turn. like really really forced you know like if you did like 36 nothing it'd be like oh yeah yeah a little over the top bama and then you've got and then you've got your high flying uh your high flying bounty hunter who looks all cool and then dies in incredibly stupid way that's texas a nm yeah there you go broboffet i don't know i feel like the aggies that's that's like the whole clone army right yeah that's true we were meant we were meant to die

Captain Rex. Just millions and millions and millions of weirdos. Just totally identical weirdos in the middle of nowhere. Just out there, just out there going, whoop! Whatever you say, Emperor. We covered the whole schedule. Good job, everybody. No, let's go ahead.

Let's talk about the Georgia game because, huh. This game wasn't close at all. Not even slightly close. No, nothing good. Nothing good happened for Mississippi State. in this game whatsoever.

Nothing. They had the superior mascot. Come on now. They did. They have a more balanced, less... Death prone.

Death prone. They have a healthier looking dog. They have a dog. Not a lab experiment. That's true. They made as many field goals. They tied in field goals.

That's good. Punt yardage? Man. Almost double them up. I don't know. Something's wrong with Georgia. I mean, you look at this punt yard than just like 182, that's not going to get the job done. Kick the damn ball. Kick the damn ball. You know what they need to take a lesson from? Florida. You need to rely on that punting game

and on your opponent only having 10 people on the field. Or just not covering someone. So, all right. So are we talking about Florida? Because I, listen. No, we usually do. Let's peel back the curtain here. I was pushing for us to totally take the full cast in a new direction and have a special Spencer Ryan only segment that Jason didn't have to be a part of we were going to let him off the hook. I don't want him to have to listen to two

whiny fucking Florida graduates who are never happy about anything even when they win, even when they extend a winning streak to 31 years undeservedly I don't want him to have to deal with that but Jason still wants to be a part of this for some reason.

I don't know why I don't know why any of us want to be a part of this I think if you two are seeing this thing out, then I am bound to do the same. So what I'm going to do is whenever we talk about Florida, I'm going to be the Florida fan that I think I would be if I had grown up on a team with three national titles in my lifetime and many SEC championships and so on and so forth. So I'm just going to be the Florida Homer, who's sick of his sick of my game. being disrespected on here.

Okay, sure. I don't have that much to say about the Kentucky game, except I'm sorry, Kentucky. That sucks. I'm real sorry. Like, you are partially to blame here. I want to make that clear. This is not, you were not walking down the sidewalk, minding your own business, and a car jumped the median and crossed three lanes of traffic and hit you and killed you.

You were walking in the middle of the intersection with. uh your headphones on so like i can't totally take this off you but yeah i'm sorry yeah i mean i can say i'm sorry and and that's fine i think that's that's not even the sportsman like thing to do i think that's just a humane thing to do because there were people who insisted that when they were up you know because i was convinced we were going to lose this game because generally i'm just convinced florida's going to lose anyway no matter what happens right since about two thousand nine on that that's been the general

jason jump in here come on Kentucky should have joined the Patriot League when they had the chance bro 31 years and counting rack them up I mean look look gators are the most clutch team in the country two weeks in a row back to back off all the offense we need all you know all these folks out here want us to look like you know look like a big 12 team well it ain't happening

we use only the offense we need because we're saving it all up for the Bama game Yes, we're going back to Atlanta. We're going to take on the tide again. We're going to score 19 points this time. Tell them I said that, too. All the offense we need, we get on the last play of the game. If Tennessee doesn't have enough DBs, perfect.

We're going to throw to a guy who's covered by DBs. If Kentucky doesn't have enough defenders, perfect. We're going to throw to a guy who's supposed to be covered by defenders. All we do is make you forget that you need to put defenders on the field. You've entered the Florida mine constriction zone. your brain doesn't work anymore your roster's falling apart now it looks like ours and you know now we've dragged you into the circle of madness and you just can't handle it jason may have a point there maybe florida's whole strategy is just for like the first three and a half quarters just to be like

sleep sleep oh no you don't want to play deep why would you want to play defense here we're not we don't need you to here have the ball we're uh so weak who's the Pokemon who just sleeps and takes takes hits and there's one of them he's just this big dude his attack is you just sleeps and like you can't hurt him that's florida man i'll remember his name in a minute yeah it's like drowsy or sleepy slumpy or something yeah um also jim mackoing 15 and 3 in the cc um he he is that's we can't make that up he actually he actually is 50% of any SEC coach don't look it up to make sure i'm pretty sure it is so therefore best SEC head coach.

Sure. Yeah. I believe it's the best start. I believe it's like as good a start as Steve Spurier had. This is good a coach of Steve Sprayer. This game was so unpleasant and stupid and unfair that for me to complain about it, I feel like would actually be worse, would actually make it worse than it already was. I don't know what the opposite of Schadenfreude is.

I guess it's compassion, actually. Oh, that's disturbing that I didn't know what that was On the top, frustrating So this is what that feels like That's what law school did to me Fuck, fuck, well Guess I'm ready to be a father one year in, good job You know what? Here

I have no compassion for Florida State There, there it is, I'm back Oh, my boy, I found my, yeah, me neither Me neither, cook him That's great But by the way, that game, that game That again, this was not, you know, people say, well, you know, there's going to be, there's going to be upsets this weekend, right? And there kind of were.

There weren't really like, they're upsets. You know, you just didn't get ones that were like absolutely shocking, right? You got one where that kind of made sense. You're like, oh, look, there's a very, there's a limited Florida state team, right? Blackman's learning the job. And he's learning on the job as quarterback against a UNC or against an NC state team with, a really good defensive line. That was going to happen, right?

Like, that makes sense to me that that was going to happen. I, here, I'm just going to throw out some teams here. And if you can find the common thread, I want you to identify it. Baylor, Charlotte, U-TEP, UMass. Teams without wins. Florida State, Bowling Green, yeah. Yep, these are the teams that don't have a single win. And Florida State, you have very good reasons for why you are 0 and 2 and 2 and not, let's say 2 and 2.

I'll be generous. Fine. But you are your 0 and 2 right now. And based simply on this game and what the NC State defensive line was able to do consistently, I do not feel good about the Clemson game for you. I don't. Oh, no, no. I don't see it going well.

No, this seems, this seems, like, this seems bad. This seems very, very bad, particularly because NC State, hmm, big, malicious, marauding defensive line capable of disrupting your entire offense. Okay, cool, cool, cool. What's Clemson got? And who have they already taken care of? Oh, Lamar Jackson. So, so how do you think Blackman's going to do?

Because he's not Lamar Jackson, and they beat Lamar Jackson up. So how's your freshman going to do? All you got to do is what Boston College did for the first three quarters, which is something that I can't tell you because no one understood it. This wasn't even one of those games where you're like, oh, man, you look at all the crazy shit NC State pulled out. It's like, no, Florida State had one turnover. NC State was 5 of 12 on third down, converted on fourth once.

You know, they hit some big plays in the passing game. You know, 71-yard touchdown, a few other longish plays. But so did Florida State. I mean, this was not the case of like, oh, well, you know, they got the few bounces here and a few lucky things there. Nope, just lost. Just straight up lost. No other explanation for it.

Good night. Go home. Have fun. We, I mean, we entered this week kind of hoping for like big shocking top 10 upset. And yeah, FSU was number 12, sure. And NC State was unranked, sure. But I think we all knew, you know, FSU was just there just because, well, you lost to Bama and you haven't had a chance of anything else yet.

Let's just park you there for now. Like, it wasn't really a true. top 10 team without you know without francois with a totally untested quarterback and all that um we also saw oklahoma state go down that was a top 10 team taking an upset um we saw oklahoma have way too much trouble with baylor um and then you know uscccgown cow for a little bit michigan same with peru for a little bit but let's let's talk about that clemson game let's talk about because you know i want you to imagine you're 14 years old And you're, you know, it's a Saturday in the summer, you're home by yourself.

And as your parents are leaving to go run an errand to go to a wedding or something, they're like, hey, we want you to load the dishwasher, make your bed, and take out the garbage by the time we get home. We're going to be gone for like five hours. We just want you to do those things. And you just fuck around. You just are taking a nap and calling your friends and doing whatever 14-year-olds do, which I will not mention here because I'm sure it's disgusting. And then you look at the clock and you're like, oh, shit, they're going to be home in 20 minutes. They just, they texted me 15 minutes ago saying they were leaving. And then you run and just as quick as you just load that dishwasher in the sloppiest way possible.

You sort of just throw the comforter over the bed to say, yeah, I made it. I'm just not good at it. You drag that garbage out. And technically, yes, you've done everything that was asked of you, but you did it in the, like, dumbest, dip shittiest middle school way possible, high school way possible. That's Clemson. That's Clemson.

College, college way possible. That's Clemson 34 Boston College. Early 20s way possible. That's Clemson 34 Boston College. That is Clemson 34 Boston College 7. Because this is a score that we will look, We'll look back at this score at the end of the season and be like, oh, Clemson had no, motherfucker, it was 7-7 in the fourth quarter.

Yeah, yeah, because what was the best? The best that Boston College could hope for was stasis. That was it. The best they could hope for was, our game plan, boys, nothing happens. Nothing. That's it. They can't do anything. Boston College can only prevent things from happening, right?

And hope that through negative effort, they can actually win a game. That's it. They're basically erosion, right? The sheer force of non-will. Right. They're just like, what do you do? They're basically Bartleby the football team, right? Like, would you like to rush?

I would prefer not to. Would you like to pass? I would prefer not to. Can we snap the ball? I would prefer not to Like that's That's them Every time

Bart'll be of a scrambler Yeah Scrambling Scramble is a little dangerous Just laterally though Just to be clear Just laterally Just to burn clock

Scutling around Like a Boston crab Yeah that's That's what they got man And you know like I kind of respect it They don't care They're not going to do anything well

It is it is a nihilist's approach To a college football it's all I got and I get it but like optimally it's how you would win a fight if you were in a fight at all right because all right well maybe this is how Ryan and I would Jason's from Georgia and he's got a little Jason can scrap Jason can's got enough chats I'm a little frightened of him and a scrap okay Ryan and I we're just gonna hope you get winded right like I don't know I got some size maybe we'll get winded you'll just give up we'll just walk no y'all y'all are a lot stronger than me so I don't know no in a bar fight Spencer and I are just, like, doing that thing where you, like, run around the pool table and just keep them between the, them and the pool table, it's just that. Just like, oh, no, hey, come on now. I'm just, I was just fucking around. Hey, what do we? Ha, who?

Let's just, just got to get to the fourth. Oh, damn it. Ah, you punched me right in the neck. Win the turnover battle. That went exactly the way I thought it was going to go, but it was my only hope. Yeah, that's, that's. That's all they can hope to do. So when you look at it, right?

And also, by the way, if you look at it, Kelly Bryant, Kelly Bryant had a terrible day throwing the ball. Like, let's not gloss over that either, right? Like, he threw two picks. I only threw for 140 yards. It's not like they're really like, you know, letting them air it out versus Boston College. But you had a bad day.

So if Clemson's going to have trouble later on, that's probably where it's going to happen is in the passing game. And that's predictable, right? That's predictable. You got a first-year starter, a good rushing attack, and somebody who's, you know, kind of sort of still getting the hang. I think that's fine. That's fine.

But that's who they are, right? Like now we're a good four weeks into this season. There's not many illusions to be had, right? Like, Alabama is not really going to beat you passing the ball, are they? True. Do they really have to do that? No, not at all. They don't.

They can just run you over. That's what they did against Alabama. That's what they did against Vandy. they didn't have to do anything else do you know how many people carried the ball they have 52 different people carry the ball like they literally took out their fifth string running running back at one point they were on their sixth string running back the yeah if you have if you have children who listen to this show and please don't let the government know that you do that they will take them away um don't let them listen to this because everything about the alabama vanderbilt box score is criminal it it's like it's like a lost chapter of the movie seven it is Vanderbilt finished with 78 total yards 70s 70 over over four quarters of action so what would be a a drive right for a team was was their entire game it's actually kind of a miracle that they only lost

59 nothing if you look at the box score for this Vanderbilt only Vanderbilt only ran 38 plays like I feel like this is the kind of thing where you look at and you're like, hold on, are they suffering from

lost time? Did they do that thing from speed where you're just watching the same thing over and over again but in reality Vanderbilt's fled? I don't it's oh it's bad it's very very bad they put up a picture on the security camera of themselves running an offensive snap but they were actually like just leaving okay good good times yeah no they

could have like the number of things that vanderbilt and their entire staff could have been doing during this game and nobody really would have noticed massive right like once once alabama was up like 31 nothing i bet they were like yeah i'm gonna call my accountant it's fine why wouldn't i i'm not doing any good here i'll just what i'll get some errands done the thing that was sad about this game was you know the week before bambi gets a nice win over kansas state and a player's on the field says bamma you're next you know and then derrick mason says you know like just normal confident coach stuff but he says you know like i think we'll have some stuff for bama you know and then like fans channing we want bama and all that it's like

totally harmless it's like that's football stuff that's college something happens but you can't do any of that don't don't say bama's name just don't just don't acknowledge who you're playing say nothing because they're going they're you know they're gonna make up all kind of crazy motivational stuff about you you know those dudes are going to want to destroy you by game time don't make it easy don't make them hate you because they will don't have the fifth string running back in they're hating you yeah he can he could probably be your starter oh yeah you would you would you would kill for that it's it's it's it's just violent it's it's deeply violent and

I know oh I have one note I just want to take out of this game because you know we don't talk about Alabama a lot because like they're going to win and that's boring here it's like oh yeah they're going to win whatever there's now oh what are the important matchups in this game you're like I don't know one team's Alabama the other one isn't like for all except for like three or four teams maybe five teams in college Yeah, like one of whom they've already destroyed. Right. Right, one of whom they've already destroyed and did so handily.

Right? One of whom's season they've already ended. Yeah, yeah. Like, you want to talk about, like, the bodyball effect where you're like, I don't know, Bama kind of has a sort of hangover effect. Yeah, sometimes they have like a dead effect. You're like, wow, I'm feeling really dead after playing them. Yeah, like that deadish feeling doesn't really go away, does it?

But on the other hand, Tennessee improved three and one. That is a pivot I did not expect out of that. That is an ankle snapper. Well done. Tennessee, 17. UMass 13. There's no joke there.

There doesn't need to be. This game. Uh-huh. UMass with a backup quarterback, no less. Yeah. UMass lost its starter. like a guy who you're like that could be my cousin like somebody who's so talented

because they got a Division I football scholarship but not someone who you go I couldn't be related to that person and who was on the sidelines for UMass in this game is that special assistant Chris Berman it is rublin

my god yeah I don't um like there were a couple of victories that happened this week that you look at and go you really lost that game didn't you like oh yeah sure we we definitely won that game florida is one of them yep admitted yeah florida florida's one of them right beat the shit out of the wildcats for the 31st time in a row but tennessee is also i am boo yeah you don't you don't feel good about that

and you shouldn't right like that's not that that's one of those games where I'm in more than familiar with this South Carolina as well South Carolina who narrowly pulled out the victory over over the son return of Skip Holtz coming to the place where he coached with his dad for a minute you know which is one of like 83 different places in the nation if you go back you realize that basically Lou Holtz is the man from Hadleyburg he's coached everywhere and he had the same sort of promise at every single place he's got all of them in on NCAA probation he's the devil from a mark twain story and he got all of them on NCAA probation except for south carolina somehow which i don't know

maybe that says something super perverse about those south carolina football program that lu holz couldn't even get them on probation right um did get them into a season and ending brawl that counts something that count there's a spectacular one had one of his running back kicking someone in the head on national TV. That's an accomplishment. I would like to say, though, that there is, if anybody from ESPN stats or anybody who runs the website at ESPN is listening, there is one, this has to be just like somebody, you know, put an extra digit in or something,

because this number is not right. For this game, it says the attendance was 95,000, 324. I assume that that's supposed to be. 9,532.4, because, you know, babies in utero, they count. You know, nobody came to this game. Nobody. And what I was describing to one of our colleagues, this is the game where you're like, okay, I got, you know, little six-year-old, little six-year-old Brian.

She really wants to go to a Vols game. And, you know, I got tickets. And I'm not, listen, I'm not going to, she doesn't get to go to, you know, the big game. I'm not going to take her to, I'm not going to take her to the Georgia game. But, yeah, she can go to UMass. That's going to be fun. Tennessee's going to win easy. You know, no big deal.

And then, oh, Brian, we got to leave at halftime. Because otherwise, you're going to hear some things you're not supposed to hear. You're going to hear some. Otherwise, Brian, you're going to have to testify against me in a court of law when Butch ends up chopped up into pieces in the river. This is the ticket you give somebody so you can rob their house. Yeah. because they're going to stay the whole time they'll be like oh god I'm not going to watch this

I can't believe though they'll be sitting there like when does it get better they said it would get good here's the problem based on the cameras based on the footage of this game if you gave somebody a ticket to this game thinking ah they'll be out of the house for three hours

man I hope you got your burgland done quick because they did not stick around at all not one bit grab the like seriously just grab the flat screen quick swipe of the like possession drawers and then get out of there and this is not this was not sometimes you have those close games where you're like well maybe they just like fucked up on the goal line a ton or fumbled of you know muffs and punts did some like little stupid shit that kept it

close and kept them from scoring and kept the other team in it nope Tennessee only outgained umass by 38 yards whole game possession pretty much even UMass slightly favored turnover battle there was only only one right yeah Tennessee had one turnover the University of Massachusetts zero and it was early too it was starting quarterback dormanty fumbled in like the first quarter and they were clean after that but he somehow got benched for a guy who struggled even worse and you know for a long time A guy who finished with an amazing passing line, two of five for negative three yards. Spencer, do sacks count against your passing yardage in college football?

But they do not. They do not. They do not. Amazing accomplishment you've pulled off here, Tennessee. What are you doing? What is anyone in that program doing? You know what the answer is? Winning.

It's, you know what? The board. The board says. W. It says 3W, buddy. They're kind of beat Georgia, ain't they? So just based on this, just based on where we are, after this week,

if Georgia doesn't win the SEC East, I can't imagine how Georgia fans will cope with it. Look at the wreckage. You want to talk about the Missouri game? No. Yeah. Okay. Kent, I do actually want

to mention one thing about the Missouri game. man at our first like extremely uh extremely emotional moment from a coach that'd be very odom i don't know if you saw as postgame comments um it was they're the words of uh they're the words of a man who has been up very late has had a very bad week that was part of a very bad month and that was part of a very bad year and uh it wasn't like Like a, you know, it wasn't like a, hey, we'll see this on highlight reels kind of thing. No, man, it was, it was bad. It was basically Barry Odom being, like reading his resume, being like, I have value.

I've done things. I've seen things. I've done them. And I'm the guy for this job because all of those things that I've done and seen, I was definitely there and participated in them. It was bad. It was watching somebody, it was watching somebody stay together who was completely unraveled. It was not good at all.

Mizzou is in a bad, bad place. He needs to go hire that Brian Dayball from Alabama. Mizzou is in a bad place. South Carolina needed a last second field goal to beat Louisiana Tech. Kentucky, Florida, feel like we covered it. Vanderbilt, feel like we covered it. Georgia, you're fine. You're great.

So here's what we're talking about is, is wreckage, psychological devastation, programs that are faltering and may not even exist. This is the segue where I thank you, our listeners, who have donated almost $3,000 now to hurricane relief to help people who are suffering from actual wreckage and actual devastation and not just being actually bad at football. Who are these brave heroes? People like Trevor Magnati. People like Spencer McCombs, Donnie Butts. These are the kind of people who are giving money to help. People like Joe Doty. What is Joe? want us to say, quote, Ray Goff's side as he drew his katana. That's a great thing that you made me say, Joe, thank you for donating money to make that happen. Hey, Joe, do you, do want to, can I

give a basic? I want to give a bonus for him because he's had a really good one. Do it. Right, where I'm supposed to say Raygoff's side as he drew his katana. Raygoff side as he drew his katana. I'm going to do it in the Jeff Sessions voice just for you. Oh, okay. Oh, shit. Right, Raygoff's side is he drew his katana look at that folks Kat Katana people like Gary Rice

who wants us to know Gary wants us to know that he started listening to the full cast in the summer the episode where Holly and Spencer discussed lawn care disasters and he's listened to every episode since he has watched two NCAA footballs in his entire life but he still

enjoys the show Gary you might be Butch Jones' best friend in the world right now. Can you consider being a Tennessee booster? Because you're exactly the kind of person that he needs. Somebody who will give money and not watch Tennessee football. That's perfect.

That's exactly what he's looking for. How can you be like these and other fine people? Because we haven't named everybody. Are you fucking kidding me? We're going to get to everybody else throughout the rest of the season. You have less than a week to go to bit.ly slash full cast 2017. and donate to one of the, I think, five charities now that we have up there. I'm going to get a little bit serious here for just a second.

And I promise we'll be back to college football bullshit. Puerto Rico is in a terrible state right now. We're talking massive devastation, basic services like power and water and fuel. Not going to have power for anywhere from like three to six months. minimum. So it's entirely possible that I'm going to overreact here. If you said that this was going to be the

case for any state in the United States, if you said, hey, sorry, yeah, Mississippi's just not going to have power for six months. New Mexico's just not going to have power for six months. Devastation's too brutal. I would like to think that we collectively

would be so pissed off at the idea that a U.S. state was going to be without something as basic as power in a place where people, oh, I don't know, need to go to the hospital, need to have babies, need to go to work, need to, you know, exist in a normal day-to-day life that we would say, nope, not okay, we would like to do something about that. We got to get that number down. I will, without, I'm going to hold it down here. I am not confident that the people in charge actually care enough about it right now to do that.

So if you could be so kind as to donate to the Fulcast Charity Drive, I would be oh so grateful because it's bullshit, y'all. It's total bullshit. It makes me so furious to think about. We can go on to talk about college football. One of you pick a game. I would like to talk about TCU, Oklahoma State. Ooh. I would like to talk about the madness of facing a guy.

who was pissed that they didn't score 80 points versus SMU and who rolled into your stadium and absolutely dare we break out the M word it's time this was a molly bopin this was a complete domination start to finish TCU had the ball for like almost 40 minutes time of possession not an indicator of dominance

but it's a correlation sometimes if you matched up with a few other things all right like I don't know running the ball Derry Sanderson was a monster Darius Anderson could not be contained They ran the ball for 238 yards On Oklahoma State You know what?

When Oklahoma State couldn't run the ball To run clock either That's when you start losing When you throw a couple picks And you fumble and you lose turnovers And those big beautiful deep balls James Washington are pretty much the only thing you got And even those dry up

Yeah, you're in trouble This was probably like This was legit the most beautiful game plan the week like by far Gary Anderson absolutely just just absolutely dominated Gary Patterson I'm sleepy

Gary Patterson dominated and helped by the fact that coaching matchup here you know after after half time it's 20 to 10 at half you get this sequence Oklahoma State Interception

TCU touchdown it's not 2710 17 points even against a good a good offense like Oklahoma States should be enough in most circumstances. It stays that way, but Oklahoma State slowly crawls back into it. They get that down to a six-point deficit with three minutes to play.

And what happens? 42-yard touchdown run by Darius Anderson. Just ice is it. Just as like, no, we're not. We appreciate that you tried. We appreciate that you didn't play terribly Oklahoma State. You didn't, you know, you didn't, you didn't look like unwashed ass or anything like that. But TCU was just going to win this game.

And they were just going to do it by running the ball really damn well. Kenny Hill, listen, Kenny Hill did what he needed to. It didn't make too many mistakes for them. He had a, he had a, he had a, he had a, he had a, he had a, he had a, he had a, he had a, he had a, he'llish moment. And that's, that's fine, because you know what it ended up doing? Not much. Didn't have damaged the campaign at all. this is a

this is a very intriguing TCU squad very intriguing TCU squad I don't know what their ceiling is exactly I don't know you know how they will react if they are on the flip side of this equation if they're the ones struggling in to come back from the dog fight themselves I mean granted the Arkansas game is pretty close

until the fourth quarter and SMU gave them a little bit of a time early but that was mostly nonsense but looking down the rest of the schedule for them they they host West Virginia next all of the that's not until October 7th they go to Kansas State they host Kansas

they go to Iowa State they host Texas and then you do have you do have Oklahoma and Texas back to back Texas Tech also kind of an interesting team right now. But there is a good possibility that, especially if they can get by West Virginia, which West Virginia, you had the other version of the Clemson game this week.

Yeah. You know, yeah. Oh, 5634. Yeah. Come on. Do you know what the score actually was with like, I don't know, nine minutes to play, seven minutes to play, something like that? It was 42-34. You almost let Kansas back into it.

Ooh, West Virginia. You still like Kansas score 34. There's that. That's a problem. Shouldn't do that. Not okay. I will say that the intriguing part of Texas Tech, besides having a defense, which is, you know, that's different.

Novel. That's novel. That's new. And besides being 3-0, beaten Houston at home, right? and playing a game which was low-scoring for a real long time and squirling it away at the end with every part of your football team and not just your offense. I mean, yeah, it's all pretty spectacular.

After the game, on Twitter, at PKP Miller time, tweeted at head coach Major Applewhite of Houston, Kyle Allen 10 was awful. Coach Applewhite was calling some terrible plays terrible showing from the coogs today really disappointed and uh in response major apple white tweeted these words one tweet you next tweet you same minute my office oh o f f i see and the one minute later capital m capital o lowercase oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh l l

l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-one minute later major apple-white mm-chapital m lower-case m moll pull all Houston's head coach is a damn defective speaking spell it's it's that it's that moonbase alpha video john madden john madden john madden john madden john madden john madden john madden john madden john madden this It just sounds like when they're shutting down a howl in 2001. Sing for me, Hal. Ted Coach is one of those accounts from like 2008 that drill will retweet every now and then where it's like, I am good husband.

That's their only tweet ever. Like, yeah, I could just, this is everything that you want out of an interaction online. Mobile. That's good. Are they still up? Did he take these down? I believe he took those down.

Bo. Well, Boo. Two and ten. Moble. That's all I'm going to say. That, that, I'm sorry, I'm not taking questions right now. To anything.

And, and my thoughts in that subject have evolved. Somebody's like, man, here's this amazingly stupid thing you said. You said Washington was going to win the national title one year. And I'm like, ah, my thoughts on that subject have evolved. I'd like to be excluded from this narrative. I am confident eliminating one team from the national title hunt, though. UCLA. Yeah.

Thanks about time. Y'all. We're overdue. You lost to Sanford by 24 points. Was the score, I don't know, 27 to 3? No. No, it was not. It was 58 to 34.

58 which man I don't I don't know if you've watched Stanford that's not that's not

the team thought you'd get 58 out of do you know how many points Stanford scored against USC and San Diego

State combined let's see 25 or so it's 41 yeah they got like they got 20

I know that I know they got 24 off off SC yeah yeah yeah

um good God Jim Mora just blink if you want to live please send us some signal anything With those tiny beady eyes Does he really even need to blink

Like his little squinny little eyes Are so close together They're all probably Properly moisturized at all times anyway Stanford ran for It's like the blinding rage coursing through him The blood just flowing over his eyes He doesn't need to blink

Stanford ran for 405 yards on 45 carries. Yeah, their whole game plan was Bryce Love right, Bryce Love left, and it worked fine. I know that everybody,

you know, transfers and possible NCAA changes to the transfer rules are a very sensitive topic right now. People are like, oh, we're basically agreed in free agency for college football. I say it's maybe not going far enough. Can we let Josh Rosen

transfer now, like mid-season, like to any other team? To an FCS team, yes. He can go play for James Madison. He would probably have a better chance. He would probably have a better chance of making the college football playoff or the

Pac-12 championship game at this point. I was going to say, can we get Josh Rosen to like SMU or Texas Tech? You can just get him somewhere freewheeling where he could breathe. We can roam. Hold on. Because he's got that in his blood, man.

Josh Rosen. That dude just likes to throw the fucking ball. Can we put Josh Rosen? Let him throw the ball like eight times in game. Can we put Josh Rosen on Miami? What NFL team do we need to get him on? Like, we need just the one NFL team that will actually wing the fucking thing around. That's where he needs to go.

Packers. Jets don't take him. Let's just get him to the Packers and, you know, take him like, take that three-year, that three-year JD degree, right? You know what? Would the Broncos take Josh Rosen right now? If they know it's good for him. Probably. Okay.

Why not? Why can't we make these things happen? Why does Josh Rosen have to toil at UCLA? Losing to Stanford 5834. I got the team for him. Drew Brees Apprentice. That team just wings it around 400 meaningless yards per weekend. That's perfect.

The Saints could probably also give up 58. points to Stanford so that works right that's fine yeah I love I love by the way that you're like like Drew Bree's fantastic quarterback you falcons fan going down and then just like to throw the ball

all we do is run the ball that's all I know listen every falcons game comes down to just running the football at the end and winning a last minute appeal of the rules listen yes sir just litigating our way to victory baby sorry sorry that the falcons sorry that the falcons Sorry, we know the rules. Sorry, we know the Constitution.

Sorry, we know the football constitution. Sorry, we know how time works. Perry Mason, the football team. No, it's Matt Locke. Matt Lock, the football team. Time lords, that's us. I also want to highlight, by the way. I mean, this is a very busy weekend when we look at things to discuss, things to break down,

and things that maybe will come back to haunt us later. it would it would have been a really really really bad thing like like i can only think of one coach for whom a loss in this game would have been worse right in terms of loss this weekend would have been worse kevin sumlin with with his team entering cc play in the position where i think a lot of other teams would just flounder or give up fighting their way in overtime to a win a win you a really important one in their division right just when we thought oh man someone's done oh man a and m's done hold that thought now you know the other coach the only other coach i can think of for whom this weekend a loss would have been just even worse uh he was the guy

the the other sideline that did be repelam see i was going to say ed or john almost losing the syracuse whoops no i think that was bad i don't think the outcome mattered at all in that I think just the terror of almost losing to Syracuse at home in front of a half-empty stadium. Oh, no, that damage is done. That's a bad, bad, bad, bad look, period for LSU. I think losing this came outright, Arkansas, doing it the way they did. Oh, that's like the only thing, the thing that's protecting Bert, as we so fondly call Brett Bilema, the only thing protecting him is that massive buyout.

That big old poofy buyout, just that, like that, it's like that big old, big old plushy you win at the, at the carnival. A comfy sweatshirt of the buyout. Is he on the bomb squad? No, that's just what he looks like. Just a big old, big old, big old, lumpy, lumpy bowl of buyout. I call it the Burt Locker.

What happens? blow down. It blows up exactly the same way in overtime against Texas A&M despite having a 14-point lead in the fourth quarter. Yeah. So let us peruse the next, let's say, month or so for our friends in Arkansas. Next, they play New Mexico State. New Mexico State 2 and 2, they should beat New Mexico State.

even though that is a team that hung with Arizona State and hung with Troy. So they're not, they're not rapidly improving New Mexico State. Man, they, they, U-TEP will have a separate conversation about you. No, we won't talk about U-TEP. After that, they go to South Carolina, to Alabama, and then they host Auburn and go to Old Miss. This is, oh, boy. I feel like, I feel like we're sending a very drunk Brett Bilema out onto, like, a McDonald's playplace and being like,

crawl to the other side, Brett, it'll be okay. You definitely won't die in there and smell like pee when we recover your body. Good luck. Don't choke on the malls. You know, the top of this has like a little rocket ship cockpit. It's a pretty boss. Just got a beer up here. There's no lawn here, take him a pants off.

I don't know why you think that. Hey, my, my pants are off. And also, you're going to need to send me up a big, Big sack of Whoppers. This is a McDonald's play. Whoppers, please. And, you know, all we have, all we have are,

all we have are numbers. Okay. That's all we got. That's really, like, you know, we can, you can make fun of a person. Sure. Brett Bilemon, I have to say, that sweatshirt, not the greatest choice in terms of wardrobe.

Disagree. Disagree? Okay, that's good. People of reasonable minds can disagree on tasteful matters. He's from Iowa. we can't disagree on certain elements of his resume at this point i eat at his record now in in god this is this is now this is this is year five man year five where they they've won a texas and the liberty bowl and they've never finished higher than third in the west and his record at arkansas it's 26 and 28 and he's been paid four million dollars a year

That's his overall record. That's his overall record. His SEC record is just... Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's worse. His SEC record... He's 26 and 28 at Arkansas.

And his SEC record, 10 and 23. God. Yeah. He's 10 and 23 in the SEC. It is... We are... There are a lot of coaches in the SEC right now that are just like... Really lining up.

Just me. I'm like, I want to be first. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, that news looks nice. Can I, can I go first? Ooh, a new guillotine. I want to try it. Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. Brett, you are, uh, you're going to be missed, sorely missed.

Not really. It's not good. It's not good. And, you know, like, I will beat the drum for the SEC making horrible, like, hiring decisions left and right. I don't even think this was a bad one. And I just think it's like, you're like, okay, well, what happened? You're like, that shit ain't working out at all. Like, this is just not working out.

And I'm not. It was a bad one because it was epistolary in nature. Don't hire someone because they wrote you a nice letter. That's the dumbest shit I've ever heard. Who would do that? Oh, a guy, Jeff Long, that actually happened, right? Like, I thought you handled the Patrino thing with great. That's like how a 17th century novel begins.

When you're like, and then she murdered him after, after he brought her over from England to the colonies. She slipped his throat and watched him die. The end. I wanted to find a gentleman of good faith. Found one. Oh, it's deaf long. That's how you ended up dead in that steamer trunk. Yeah, this is just not, when you go, man, this is just not working.

It's really not working. And the other thing, too, is that, like, when you go, oh, hey, well, what works and doesn't work? You go, well, I know in the SEC West, very little has worked because you all have to play Alabama. And honestly, like, I think they just suck a lot of the air out of the room. Very few people who just sort of thrive. And LSU is the one team where you go, I think you could hire a number of people who could potentially be, like, almost screw that up, and you're still so talented that you'll probably win a bunch of games, which is why, like, I don't think the Ed Orgeron thing, like, even if it wasn't like the best idea, that won't show up for a while.

It's going to take a minute for that to come out and wash, if that's the case. Let us end with the born identity of football games, where things were real shaking and you couldn't really tell what was going on, and it ended only because one person found a candlestick to choke the other one with, to shove down his throat and kill him. Penn State, Iowa 2119. How are those 21 points scored? Don't worry about it. Touchdowns are in there. It's got, let's look at the ingredients.

Touchdowns is in there. Why you got to read past that? They're touchdowns. Stacking points. That's what they were doing, y'all. Stacking points. This is, by the way, like, when you look at a box score and it looks like the number of the ages of somebody's children,

it's not good. when you talk about that, right? Like Penn State, well, we have a three-year-old, a two-year-old, a ten-year-old, a six-year-old. That's what it looks like if you're at a cross. At one point, we had a fiber, y'all. We had a fulfer. Penn State was playing blackjack like, hit, hit, hit, hit, hit, hit, hit. Eventually, you'll run out of cards, and then I win, right?

Ace, ace, ace. Bleed them dry. This was, so, this was the opposite of the Tennessee UMass game. where you're like, yep, box score backs that up. Penn State had 579 total yards, and Iowa had 273. It's, this final score, this final score,

and the fact that if it wasn't for a near miracle pass, a miracle pass on fourth and goal, Trace McSorley, off his back foot to the middle of the end zone, through traffic to score the game, Through fingers, through fingers that were almost on the ball. To score the game-winning touchdown, this would be the most, I mean, it's almost reminiscent of the Ohio State Penn State box score from last year, where you're like, wait, huh? Who did the, but you did, hmm?

The thing with the, yeah, this is, this was almost Kurt Ferrence's finest hour. Iowa had 11, Iowa had 11 first downs. this game. Hey, yeah, do they need an 11? They got the wrong kind of 11. I did. They got the wrong kind of 11. Damn it. They were so close. I mean, this is what, I mean, I will say this, by the way,

my, my thoughts, my happy thoughts about Iowa, not diminished one bit by this. This is exactly when something's like, oh, man, I was so shitty. They just looked so shitty for a lot of the game. And you're like, no, no, no, this is all part of the plan. Akron Wadley amazing it's a great football player

it kind of actually leaps up the screen you're like what's he doing on Iowa I don't know man he's great though go back everything Sequin Barclay had to do to put away a team that ran that you know that racked up like 200 yards like it took all it took all that from

a potential Heisman trophy winner probably won't give it to a Penn State player but that's a whole other issue but a Heisman worthy player let's say it took all that to put away a team whose entire plan revolves around well we're going to try and pin you deep

that's how we do it y'all I don't know I mean I was watching it I was like this is this is so I don't know whether like I've finally like been worn down by Iowa's charms you know maybe maybe waving at those kids off of my heart but man there's a lot of there's a lot of love that you can feel when you're watching a team just completely obstruct everything another team's trying to do

without trying to do too much on its own. Is Iowa the team that, I guess, maybe along with LSU, their early games are just so completely different from their late game. Well, I guess LSU and their fans actually show up. Like, a night game is just, it's like a completely different stadium. It's like, you watch an Iowa nooner, it's like, oh, my God, this is going to be horrible. This is going to be absolutely unbearable. An Iowa night game, let's fucking go.

Let's do it. And I mean, part of it is, yeah, they were on a hot streak and I guess still are against top five teams and all that. But when ABC comes out and says, hey, we're going to unranked Iowa for the big game, no qualms at all. Let's do it. That sounds great. No, cancel my appointments. Can't watch that. I'll be, I'll be there.

I'm going to watch Kinnick go absolutely insane for a safety. Their own. maybe one they give up doesn't matter as long as it's a safety those folks love too I had to pinch it off midstream I had to pinch it off midstream