Shutdown Fullcast - Shutdown Fullcast 7.29 - Introducing The Sandman

Episode Date: October 5, 2017

Wanna get rich? You've come to the right place, because the Shutdown Fullcast is home to THE MOST RELIABLE PRO FOOTBALL PICKER IN THE WORLD, as it turns out. There's also some college football in here, including:Spencer singing the Georgia Tech fight song as Alex JonesRyan explaining how Aragon holds the key to Michigan-Michigan StateThe one reason why Georgia-Vandy might be closeSouth Carolina-Arkansas, the most important game of the weekOr at least one we talked about a lotNot really sure why, sorryJason recording outside again Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to the shutdown forecast. I am one of your host, Spencer Hall, WDSBSBS.com, and SB Nation, and it's pretty much it. It's all I've done. I haven't really laid down the hot picks like some sports experts. I haven't given you the week-to-week college football analysis that you need in order to stretch your dollar for just entertainment purposes only. Of course, he says, wink, wink,

slipping you a betting slip from the OTB door. Yeah, that's me. Actually, that's not me. We're going to do the Sandman. Oh, the Sandman! Go to sleep on a pile of money. Hey, fellas, this is the Sandman here, calling from a pontoon boat in Shreveport, Louisiana. I don't usually talk much about the college game, so I appreciate you having me on.

I'm more of a professional football gambler. A big money player out here in Shreveport, racking up huge profits each weekend. call my line. It's a 1905 line. Not many people know about those. It's $4.99 a minute for six guaranteed lead pipe locks per weekend of professional football. You guys in the NCAA football, you've got any good draft picks I should know about for next year's games because I'm already laying big money down. Don't even know next year's pro football schedule yet, but I've already got 17 ice, cold locks. You can call right now on my 807 line for $6.99 a minute. guaranteed Ws.

Why are the locks cold? Because they're that far in the future. And I have big money on a... The sun hasn't risen on those picks yet. I am shorting the sun. I am highly confident that the sun is going to run out of heat within the next 24 hours. I got heat death of the universe.

I'm taking heat death of the universe and the points. I got the universe outlasting John Fox by three weeks. Listen, if it were that easy to be a winner, everyone would do it. That's why you got to pay the man. That's why he's the sandman. What do they call him the sandman? Because I have as many winners as the ocean has grains of sand. Which the ocean does have those, technically.

Yeah, it touches them. And you know what the ocean does, it takes the grains, just grabs them all, just like the Sandman grabs winners, leaves the losers behind, get on board. Listen, you know what the ocean does? It bounces back. Every day. Every day, the ocean bounces back. So if you get a bad pick from the Sandman that you paid $7.99 for, well, guess what? Here comes another wave of picks.

They'll all be winners. Is it a wave just over under? If you think about it, there's only two ways you can be in a wave. I just want, I just want you to say Sam Darnold in that voice. Who the fuck is that? Can we explain why the hell we just did that? Do we explain things on this show or do we just? Let's try.

Okay, well, so our Odds Shark, SV Nation's gambling partner, they've been a partner of ours for a long time. but I'm not sure exactly how to describe it. But our odds partner, I guess, would be the simplest way. They've put together a team for the Westgate Super Contest, which is one of the biggest, most competitive, most lucrative NFL picks contests. Might be the, I don't know. And, you know, the team includes from SB Nation, Matt Offer, David Fuchillo, some other, you know, football personalities.

And, like, me who doesn't even cover the NFL and can't... I looked this up yesterday. I can only name 22 NFL head coaches. But somehow I'm tied for first place on Odd Sharks team, and I think I'm in, like, the top 25 or so overall out of like 1,000 actual NFL gamblers. No one knows how this is happening. And that's why we call him the Sandman. I don't even know what's happening, and I'm winning.

He comes to you at night. He sprinkles money on your eyes. So, like, all I'm doing is just picking huge spreads. Like, because what NFL team cares about covering a 15-point spread? You get up by eight and you just start punting, unless you're in the Super Bowl. And it works, man. It works. You just see a big number and you point at it.

Easy money. Easy money says the same man. And this also meant you had to care about the end of the Chiefs game. Oh, I cared a lot. I cared a lot, and it came out just fine. Let me put it that way. My daughter was right next to me. And, you know, my wife's a Chiefs fan.

She's saying they're rooting for the Chiefs. And my daughter is so confused. Like, are we happy the Chiefs were winning by four or are we sad? And it's like, well, it's complicated. Then she'd get some bullshit points, and everybody's happy now. Sam has only lost one huge bet. You really thought that that liver wouldn't grow back for Prometheus. Didn't see that one coming.

Great play by the liver. God. Hi, welcome to our college football show. They call him the Sandman because like a pharaoh, he's dead and still ahead of you. That's right. Got all these treasures. You can't have them. Lock me in here with my cats.

Treasures are worth $4.99 a second. For just $12.99 a minute, I'll pull your brain through your nose with the magical hook. The Sandman! That's fine. The Lions haven't won a Super Bowl since. ancient Egypt either. So, it all worked out. Yeah. Yeah. So, congratulations, Jason, on being not only a college football expert, but evidently, an NFL one, too. You know what? I refuse to ask for the backstory on why the Sandman has that accent, but lives in Shreveport. Like, I don't want to know.

He's in Shreveport. We'll just put it that way. Oh, he's just in, he's just in Shreveport. Yeah. Right. He's working off a server tree port. He's actually He's actually, he's like either in Reno. Actually, not, not, not, not Reno. Like, it's got to be another town in Nevada, not, not Las Vegas. Don't try to trace the call. I'll ping it all over the world.

Just like Aaron Rogers throwing bombs all over this country. I'm releasing a fake news campaign about Matthew Stafford. So that's my hot tip. Just don't believe anything you see. on 4chan about Matthew Stafford in the next 24 hours. What is this? Oh, my God. Oh, we should start every podcast like this.

So, hey, that was Jason Kirk as the Sandman. The Sandman. The surest thing in NFL sports betting. The surest thing, NFL sports betting. Remember, succeeding on NFL betting by assuming the worst about the NFL. And if you're bored, just go look up who's at the bottom. of that list. No, no reason. Don't worry about it. If you go to oddstruck.com, you can find the standings. Just take a look. Just, just, I don't know, might be fun to see who's at the bottom.

Who's to say who's there? Probably somebody very competent. I don't know. I haven't scrolled down that far. Um, it's a long, it's a long way. Uh, Ryan and Andy joining us from, uh, from New York City, who's also the sandman. I'm the quick, I'm the quick, Sandman. I've gotten stuck in my life and I can't get out. And like Quicksand, you won't encounter him as often as fictional conceits led you to believe. For $49 a minute, I'll tell you about how

sad my life is and how I don't understand how it got this way or what I can do to change. I'm a quick Sandman. I'm in Mario 2 and kind of nowhere else. The only gamble is believing in your own promise. I think that that's

that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's Bracing darkness this early in the podcast. I'm really for it. By the way, things overestimated by children's literature in terms of importance in the world. Firemen. I mean, firemen are very important, but I'll just say they're overrepresented in boys literature by far.

Quick sand, vagrant children living successfully, right? You're talking about box car children. Oh, my side of the mountain, you know, any sort of, there's like a thousand. Sure, sure. where like Huckleberry Finn in the middle of 19th century America, the most dangerous place on the planet manages to go down the river just fine. Right? Like, oh, we'll just have a raft and everything will work out.

I'm here with an adult I don't know. That's fine, right? A minority in 19th century America. That can't go wrong. Nobody will be upset about this. No. And then in addition to that, another thing overrepresented by that is monster trucks. I'll tell you, got two boys.

Monster trucks in their importance in civil society, greatly overestimated by boys' literature. But we could change that. Like, Quicksand, we can't, I don't anticipate. We're going to be like, all right, more quicksand. But we could just be like, you know what? All public transit is monster trucks now. You know, if you want to sell it to Red State,

that would be the only way to do it. I'm running for Mayor of Shreveport, and that's my campaign. Monster truck monorails, make lips cry. make the sick libs weep libs hate these gascos bad boys the libs are just pooping their pants at the side of these monster trucks we need more of them i'm about to roll coal on this guy on a bike

in my public transit that's it every single leg seat has a button where you can just like shoot out a mask just a big old plume take that cuck They've had Marxists. Yeah, hi, quick question. How come every time the ticket taker on the monster truck monorail scans my pass, he says, lock her up? Don't really know what that's about.

Confused? By the way, that would make, I've never been to the bowl game there. I'd totally go to a bowl game in Streetport if they had Monster Truck public transit. Speaking about odd reasons to go to various small, small-ish cities in the south, have you called the Pope? yet? I just tried at 11.45 a.m. today. You would be shocked. The Popeye's buffet in Lafayette, Louisiana did not answer the phone after 20 minutes.

I think we just got to show up. So I don't know. On the off chance that you're in Lafayette, help a brother out, okay? And please, just give me a call and tell me what's up with the Popeye's Lafayette because they're not answering their calls. I know it's probably pretty hectic at 10. 45 a.m. already with all the all you can eat chicken fans that you've got but somebody give me a call back from there. Somebody told me there's a hospital across the street and I feel like we should be

able to call the hospital definitely knows about this buffet right. They're like oh yeah we get a lot of business it's sort of a one in one out kind of deal. Can you just send Bubba over just send him over and see how they're doing right just help a friend go over to the all you can eat chicken buffet that probably generates, I don't know, 30% of the hospital's business, right? Why don't you do that, you lose Bubba. Nope, now Bubba's over there. You got to form a human chain.

Hey, buddy, I'm going on break. I'll be back in eight hours. See you later. Hey, can you go fetch Rusty? Oh, damn it, we lost Rusty and Bubba now. Yeah, so I tried. So we will keep trying to establish. We will try to establish communication

with the last remaining all you need pop food buffet. Thank you. That's all I ask. Nope. It's week six. Oh, buddy. We got a couple of landmark things in week six already. I will tell you, we are recording this on Wednesday. You probably won't hear it until then, but tonight marks the beginning of odd, off-scheduled, off-brand football.

On a Wednesday night, we have Arkansas State at a winless Georgia Southern. If that doesn't spell last scuds of yogurt at the bottom of the container that you're probably still going to eat anyway, you need a new definition of that because we're here. And when we say winless, like, there are a lot of ways to go winless. Georgia Southern lost to Auburn 41-7. They lost to Indiana, 5217. And they lost to the University of New Hampshire 2212. so yeah that's not an fcs team or not an fs team that's an fcs team not great what no not good and they have not fired their coach yet correct correct um that is that is correct

they have not fired their coach joining the ranks of joining the ranks of tennessee who has not fired their coach but we did get a coach firing this week go on utep right correct correct and we're we're leading you on forward to go to sean coogler who did actually make a bowl there which if you make a bowl at utep i feel like you should get a job somewhere else after they eventually fire you just instantaneously like oh you made a bowl at utep done should give you another job right um and then replaced by utep legend Washington state uh god and the Alabama coach with the shortest actual tenure not interim, Mike Price. Well, that term was short because an article was published in Sports Illustrated that among other things alleged that Mike

Price was in fact hanging out in a strip club, had taken, I believe the article alleged that he had taken the stripper home and at one point said roll tide and the response from the dancer was

the tide is rolling. Well, this was an article Yeah, yeah. Did any of that actually happen? I don't, I mean, I wasn't there. Yeah, I wasn't there. Neither was, neither was the author. And that's, that's actually, that's actually kind of a thing.

Because this ended up being a First Amendment case, right? And, and also having something to do with Alabama Shield law, right? because Mike Price sued Sports Illustrated and Don Yeager, the reporter in question for libel, over that May 2003 article and saying that Mike Price had had sex with two dancers he met at a Florida strip club, and I quote. And he originally sued in state court, but SI moved it to federal court. How's that all work out? They ended up settling. They ended up settling for...

An unstated amount because they settled the first time and then Mike Price and his lawyer started talking about it, violating the confidentiality agreement. So they had to settle a second time. He had sued Sports Illustrated for $20 million, I think. So, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And then he went to U-TEP with a bag full of money. Right? Just went to U-Tip.

up with a ton of money and ended up like, by the way, like, if Mike Price doesn't get fired, you eventually don't end up with Mike Shula there, right? And in some ways, this might actually have something to do long term with Tim Tebow going to Florida, because if you remember, Alabama and Florida, we're like down to the wire for Tim Tebow and Shula failed to close to deal. Tibo goes to Florida. So this is all a very, very long way of saying that the association between Mike Price and a couple of dancers in an SI article in 2003. ends up with Florida in the national title in 2006 and 2008. A stripper named Destiny, no less.

It was foretold. How about that? Yeah, yeah. You should have known, by the way, as an editor when you title it how he met his destiny at a strip club. Well, and where was that strip club? Florida. So who's to say this wasn't all rigged? Pensacola, Florida.

You know what? Alabama gets to claim those national championships. That stripper's given name, Jim Tebow. See the signs, everybody. Connect the dots. I will say this too. Mike Price, cool because he let Matt Hayes of the sporting news at the time sit next to him, just like stand next to him for a whole game.

And Mike Price at one point, there's two are important points from this. One, Mike Price leaned over to Matt Hayes prior to the game and said, please remind me to run the ball cool right which Matt Hayes did and second that Matt at one point Price turned to Matt Hayes and goes what would you do right now

and Matt Hayes said I'd take a shot deep and Jason guesser threw like a 45 yard TG on the fuck so what am I trying to say I'm saying my price is pretty dope and he's very rich things for it's illustrated

I think it's that Mike Price has a complicated relationship with the media That's what I thought. In other words, he's pretty dope. That's what I'm saying. It's real strong. It goes real strong, just not sure which direction it's going to. So long and short, Uteb just got more fun.

Right. See, and people say we only talk about the SEC on this podcast. Look at that. I mean, yeah, we did tie it to Alabama and Florida. We did award two more national championships to Alabama. But besides that, Louisville plays NC State on Thursday. that was seamless look I did it look at that now we're talking about the ACC

just right into it yep now now we're talking about conference USA team and a an AAC team right that's right yep yep that is correct yes not correct P dance take note Jason's making a chill

Louisville this is a bad matchup never again I know how dare you make a joke on this podcast This is another bad matchup for Louisville. Like any team, anytime I just look at a Louisville game, I'm like, does that other team have a defensive line? Oh, yeah, yeah, that's a problem.

It's a big problem because they haven't been able to block for Lamar Jackson at all, at all. So Mark can't do it all by himself. This might be kind of interesting. Yeah, in terms of Louisville's opponents, like, if you took, if you take Louisville's opponents, is NC State one of the three best teams on the schedule, you know, maybe, not necessarily, but in terms of teams, like, designed to attack Louisville's biggest weakness, I have to say so. I mean, like, Inslee State, the defense hasn't been quite as good as expected, but it's still, still very talented at front.

It is not, I mean, have you looked at Louisville's schedule? It's not that hard to be the third hardest team on the schedule. You're basically in competition with Purdue, Wake Forest and Kentucky. Yeah, the third hardest on this schedule is not, not like an amazing accomplishment. It's a bronze medal where several of the competitors dropped out with diarrhea. Buddy, you're running down the Wakey Leaks Bowl right now, so. Sorry, sorry. Yeah.

I would, I would remind you of this, that Lamar Jackson has a lot of great stats. Our nation's leader in tackles for losses, that'd be Bradley Chubb of NC State. with 11. Are nations tied for third or fourth, depending on how you do that? That'd also be Bradley Chubb. All right, he has five and a half sacks on the year. You may notice, we're in week six. That's a whole lot of production from one defensive linemen. So if I want to watch one thing all game long, I want to watch the two of these dudes chasing each other around a telephone pole, because that's basically what they're going to be doing. Also, Bradley Tub, the same dude who spat on FSU's midfield logo and then last week against who did NC State play last week I can't remember

it was a long time ago Syracuse I think I think they held on to beat Syracuse so that game got real real scrappy toward the end there was a stretch where there were like three personal fouls in the course was like 10 plays one of them by Bradley Chubb and one of them against the dude blocking Bradley Chub for an incredible flop by Bradley Chub where like he hits the deck looks up at the ref seize the flag, and then keeps rolling. Like, the same kind of rolling a player would do if a coach is punishing him. Like, he literally looks like he's trying to, like, put out a fire and leave the stadium. But it's all part of the same, like, basically what I'm saying, this dude's awesome.

And if he sacks Lamar, he's going to hit the Heisman on him. Yeah, that will happen. Yeah, like, seriously, like, Brazilian national team soccer flop worthy. Like, it was, it was majestic. So in other words, you should really like him. It's fantastic to see a defensive line and try to get like an obvious yellow or red card. Basically what we're saying is it seems like a real jerk and we love him. Yes.

This is Devante's perfect line where you're like, wow, what a deadly thing to have on the field. He's magnificent. Keep him there. This is also, I mean, if NC State can win this game, then they're going to enter like the end of October, November. They're going to be highly ranked. and we're going to have that very fun playoff conversation a little too early or we're like, well, what about NC State? They're kind of scrappy and they still, you know, have Notre Dame and Clemson on the schedule.

And then we're going to say, what was that loss again? And be like, oh, right, South Carolina. Well, what do we do with that? That's interesting. That's a problem. How did you do that? Well, I don't know. We got one time wasting offense on one side.

and you got another time wasting offense on another. And I don't know, a random event happened. And that's how you end up with a random result, like South Carolina beating NC State. I think even better will be the majority of people who listen to this on, like, Friday. And they're like, why are they talking about four and two NC State making the playoffs? They just lost play 11 last night. Listen, listen, that wouldn't even be the third dumbest thing we say on this episode. I'm confident.

Yeah. The, um, I'm, I'm, I'm very fond, by the way, of us, of us, being able to just be like completely casual about Lamar Jackson like he's normal right like he's not currently putting up mind blowing stats and being like an insanely talented football player we're just like oh yeah yeah whatever he's he's still there but i think that he's he's thrown for 13 i think that's you know what's always interesting to me is in superhero movies that aren't origin stories there's this suggestion that like oh my god it's Batman it's super Superman Spider, and everybody's like super fucking excited.

But the reality is, if we lived in a world with a superhero, we'd all be excited for like a year or two. And then we'd all just be like, yeah, it's Superman, whatever. I still got to go to work. I mean, he's not that great. So it's not, it's not that surprising to me that we're all just sort of like, yeah, Lamar Jackson, he can levitate. But I don't know. How many, you know, Kenny, is he clutch?

Is Superman clutch? this also leads to a separate question I have about why there is not a team, like a group of five team that's just like, nope, we're no longer dumb animal name anymore. We're the Batman. That's our team name now. Somebody should do that. That seems like an easy recruiting win, and you can probably get a good tie-in with D.C. for it. Hey, man, you might think that's illegal, but Ryan's a lawyer. He can get you, he can get you that license. Yeah, absolutely. I got connections. the other day right some the other day in a conversation at work someone said maybe my favorite quote of yours ever and the most shut down full cast legal opinion ever which was

yeah Ryan's pretty sure that has the lowest possibility of getting us sued huh the lowest possibility I don't even know what that's about so I'm pretty excited I know that was in reference that was in reference to a logo for a shutdown full cast shirt that was basically stolen from a major corporate Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Comparatively, that was the one that I felt better. Oh, are we out here seizing the means of production and all that? That's right. We're not going to spoil what that might be. But, yeah, no, I'm a good lawyer, and that's why my license is no longer active. Listen, all the best ones don't even require a license. They just grant it. They're like, that guy.

Drivers and lawyers, you don't want one with a license. They care too much about sticking to the meaningless rules, not just getting out there. You know, you got to litigate light and drive by the seat of your pants. Just see what happens. Let me tell you what, Friday? Friday's a weird day. Friday's a weird moment because I haven't- Skip Friday.

Don't watch Friday. No, no, Boise State and BYU. Simmit, okay. Wake up in the morning and see the weird fake punt and the weird Hail Mary. That's all you need to know. And the fight. And the fight. The fight that happens.

Yes. Yeah, yeah. I feel like both of those games are unwatchable 27-9 games. Right. And the difference is, well, no, Memphis isn't one of them. So you could have a fight in both games. Oh, yeah, cranky Memphis having to go to Connecticut on a short week. Yeah, both these games.

I think we can go ahead and just dial up the post right now. Watch these weird, punch, fights, and Hail Mary's. Two of them. We have a, we have a pre-write for this? Sure do. We have a pre-write for a fight. I want Memphis. Because I really hope that Memphis, who plays at 7 p.m. Eastern, and Boise State and BYUu, who kick at 10-15,

p.m. What I hope is that Memphis immediately gets on a plane, makes the fight-ridden end of the Boise State BYUu game, and comes in with the steel chair as the third party to intervene, right? Like, there's a big Boise State BYU-YU brawl and it's like, I'm Memphis out of nowhere. Still in their pads, right? Didn't change anything.

Just rolled onto the field. Memphis from the rafters. We don't even have rafters. Memphis mindset. Saturday, we're looking at early shift not bad guess i mean yeah wake wake forest didn't beat florida state but at least caused them problems and yeah and yeah maybe they can hang with clemson for a little while um you got you got you got state nope you're not going to beat oklahoma well you got so the one game that is given penn state any trouble was so far whatsoever is iowa and you got knockoff iowa you got northwestern

basically the same thing it's a road game they like to grunt and punt their way to uh uh a six to four victory. So maybe we'll get a nice repeat in an infinitely quieter setting. Other than that, noon is, uh, I think Georgia, George, Georgia is going to flip script on us, right?

This is supposed to be, ooh, this is when Georgia's struggle. They're not struggling with this bandy team. Yeah. They're going to put them in a trash compactor early. The only reason they, they,

okay, there is one possibility. Georgia might intentionally struggle with this vandy team just to make Butch Jones, that much more miserable. Just so all the Tennessee fans in Nashville can be like, well, shit!

Even Vandy put up 20 points and was competitive heading into the third quarter. You find a way to beat him 40 to 1, so. They were exactly one point better than us. God damn it. I would like to share this note from

the Memphis commercial appeal for Butch Jones he had to visit the Memphis touchdown club this is a Jeff Calkins column He was there It is very very sad

At any other time When the Tennessee coach would be here There would be hundreds of people Said Jim Reedy, a Tennessee fan And when he walked into the room Everyone would stand to applaud There were not hundreds of people Nobody stood to applaud

The plates of chicken, mashed potatoes and green beans May have well been a last meal I needed a little love so I thought I'd come to West Tennessee said Jones he was shut out again that's that's

there's a note that really drives home everything that should be happening here with Butch Jones and that's when they are having this thing where they're reviewing what happened in the game right

and the Liberty Bowl they announced the Liberty Bowl's high school player of the week right and he he visited Tennessee on Saturday where they lost to Georgia and the Liberty Bowl guy whose name is Harold Grater says what impressed you and there's a moment between when the young man answers and when the question is asked and in the silence in between someone in the crowd goes Georgia I, listen, I'm worried that we're going to get a press conference in two, three weeks where Butch Jones lifts up his shirt and reveals that a la Marky Mark in fear, he has scrawled Vols forever on his torso with like, he's like etched it into his skin. And that's the point where we're going to be like, oh boy, all right, time to, time to get him a psychiatric evaluation. It's literally making him crazy. poor butch poor butch does tennessee even play this week

they do not oh my god what a weekend to be of all you don't have to watch your team play this is this is the best weekend of tennessee football the funniest possible result by the way right is georgia losing by 20 to andy right god god like that's that's the funniest possible result here Yeah, Georgia losing to 20 by 20 to Vandy, and then Derek Mason insisting that he has no interest in the Tennessee job and not taking the Tennessee job.

They're leaving Vandy to take, like, the Kansas job or something, right? I just, I wouldn't leave Vanderbilt to go to a program with less stability and poor resources, personally. That's what I would not do. Who leaves for South Carolina after MushChamp gets the, I don't know, Kentucky jobs? I don't know. Just cycle them all around. One last point. Where on earth is the Duke Virginia game blacked out?

Like where on it? Like is it geo located so that it won't play? Probably the financial district of New York City. Let's just say ain't a whole lot of black. Wow. Let's go to that. three o'clock three shit if we're looking around uh we have homecoming at florida who we got oh that's ls u weird how that happened it's weird that's going to be a mean game it's just going to be real

mean and ugly and shitty it might be fun like this is the first florida game on on the schedule that i'm like oh this one might like be interesting and fun but it's going to be very mean i feel like there's a fight in this game too this feels like fight ready to happen but Unlike the BYU and the Memphis games earlier in the week, this is the one where I'm like, there's a coin flip chance that the fight happens on one sideline within its own. Like, I could absolutely see me like, oh, and Ed Orderon has picked up a bench and is swinging it at Matt Canada.

He's gone full hole on him. You have full autonomy to run this offense. Full autonomy is a bench chair to the head. And on the other sideline, Jim McIlwain and his humping shark have clearly, had a falling out. Sharks not talking to me. I don't know what.

He's just not on board. My name is Angela. Can you call me by my name? You ass. Angela. Prep yourselves, by the way. Florida's run consistently, right? And gotten an improved marginally on offense.

And this is the game where Troy outrushes us, right? Troy will have more rushing yards than Florida has against L. you just prep yourself for that because regression regression has been the law so far so i'll just go with that alternatively it is the game where danny etling looks amazing yeah that too that too god we're terrible it's the game where florida sets the record for the most weeks without being shut out ever most consistent offense in the history of college football you just jenks it lsie's going to win nine zero now most consistent offense in the history of of America's oldest sport.

Can you believe it? It's going to be a fake field goal touchdown and a safety. That's how they're getting in a nine. The good news is you don't have to watch this game at 3.30 because you have two far superior options between West Virginia at TCU, Miami at Florida State. And really at 4 o'clock, Maryland at Ohio State probably will be watchable for long stretches, much more so than Rutgers was. against the Buckeyes. So you have choices here.

You don't have to make one of them the 330 CBS game. Nope. And you don't have to watch Oregon State USC. Yeah, don't know. Yeah. Oregon State, Oregon State, USC, no, you don't watch that at all, especially because it's not at night and it's not at Oregon State. That's the only way you should watch that because USC loses that game.

But no, the USC's already had their upset. Just penciled them in for a nice rehab game here. and everyone getting completely back on the Sam Darnold wagon in the crowd of people who only know one college quarterback besides Lamar Jackson, and that's Sam Darnold. I have one question related to 3.30. What happened to PJ Fleck? Like, I know Minnesota's been fine this year, you know, undefeated until they lost that Maryland team last weekend.

I just feel like we haven't heard anything out of him or that program. Like, has he gone, has he, like, buttoned up now that he got a Power 5 job? Is he like, all right, enough with the, enough with the shenanigans. Time to be a grown-up now. I hope that's not the case, but I'm kind of worried it might be. I don't know. I feel like Fleck versus Brom, that's the, that's the Big Ten hipster game of the year right there. Sure.

Like, you can keep your Ohio State, Michigan. We're talking about memes versus schematics. This is the nerd game. what does that make arkansas at south carolina that is the opposite that's the working man's game the working man's game that's the game for the

that's the gen x game of the year that's just the i don't i don't care fucking get it over with right sure sponsored by monster energy and pearl jam And Pearl Jam. Yeah, this is, this is, man, you know, like the quickest Puerto Rican Bond style fall off the map that here, right?

Just off the cliff is this South Carolina football. Because remember, we were supposed to, we spent a good bit of the off season beating back a low-lying brush fire that was, hey, y'all, South Carolina's going to be good. South Carolina is going to be good South Carolina's good No no that's That has not been the case Not one bit Not at all

Well they did beat Playoff participant in C State Sure And they they handled Missou fine And they beat Louisiana Tech Don't worry about why or how They

They haven't looked terrible in any game I mean the Kentucky game They kind of look a little shitty But even against A&M on the road like they weren't but there are signs that I mean ultimately it's a will must champ team it always will be you know it's sort of like um it's sort of like a BLT a BLT is always just going to be that you can be like oh the bacon this year is fucking fantastic cool it is it still a BLT okay I mean I know what that is and sometimes I even like it

but it's not going to, we're not out of here winning James Beard Awards with BLT's. BLT's not making a playoff. Man, you're trying to get little mushroom to eat a vegetable. You see how that goes. The T is for turkey. And the L is for, the L is for a little more, little more bacon, please. Let me, let me give you a, let me give you a diagnosis and see if this is part of a theme. organizationally with the management there.

All right. South Carolina, having issues along the offensive line, having multiple injuries along the offensive line, not being able to plug those holes with anybody who can stop anything or run block because one of the reasons they've had to be so dependent on Bentley, they cannot move the ball on the ground at all.

And if you're a defensive team and you can't move the ball on the ground, guess what? just playing punt ping pong for the rest of the game. And that usually leads to losses. Well, this feels like it's a problem for a lot of teams in the SEC right now. Like Vanderbilt, Vanderbilt can't run the ball. I mean, maybe it's just the east. Yeah, it's probably just the east.

Never mind. Just remember most problems are, is it just the east? This is one of those things, too, by the way, where Arkansas has zero pass rush. They have never, like this year, they've never gotten a consistent pass rush. Watch them sack Bentley like eight times in this game. And people will be like, man, that Arkansas defense just came alive. They just turned it around. Man, that bear really got after that open dumpster, didn't he?

Look at him. Just going after it. He's so hungry. I can't believe how hungry he is. It's confusing because we heard so many good things about open dumpster at SEC Media days. How open dumpster never looked. It looked like it was in great shape and was really bonding. A team leader open dumpster was.

And yet. Yeah. Yeah. This is not, it's not a good unit. It's pretty much like the rest of the SEC East and that really only one team has an offensive line. That'd be so far. And that'd be Georgia. Everyone else, you're just kind of shuffling dudes.

So sort of both symptomatic of a management problem and of kind of a problem. Listen, at this point, why doesn't the rest of the SEC East just agree to like do an offensive line timeshare and be like, okay. You know, we have between us, we have two offensive lines. And, like, you know, these are the weeks where you get them. And every other week, good luck. So you sort of pool your resources a little bit. Right. Is it communism a little bit?

Do we need it? I mean, most of these teams are not getting much to eat anyway. I mean, what's the hard? Communism is cool in the South as long as you call it by a different name. So just call it, you know, a scout salary cap or amateurism or whatever. Let me just introduce you to another, money-making opportunity Alabama football. You take your third team offensive line and then pay a premium for second team

offensive linemen, and you just ran them out on the weekend, right? They're like the cover band. They're like the traveling Broadway show where you're like, well, yeah, you know, no, you got to go to New York if you want to see the real thing. But hey, coming to Columbia, South Carolina. Look at that. It's traveling Alabama offensive line. I was thinking like

it was basically like lift but for offensive linemen they're like well I don't know got a surge price in Columbia South Carolina I gotta go play guard there this weekend that's gonna run you a little bit extra just show yeah

they can be like wow man we had to pay through the nose for it right and think about that that'd like double the GDP at the state right there just boom totally worth it got that W against Louisiana Tech y'all thanks to lift for

offensive linemen They probably just be called Lips. No, it'd be called push, but with two S's and no you. Push with a Y, yeah. It's called Pish? No, it's push. I have a request for listeners. If you are one of those people who gets, who this is, this podcast forms the majority of your college football media intake.

And yes, we know you people exist. We don't understand why, but we hear about it. I want to know what it's like to this point operating under the assumption that Arkansas, South Carolina is the biggest game of week six. How does that feel for you? I just want you to let us know. But we can continue. Hey, hey, prove it's not. It might be literally the biggest game.

Prove it's not. I think based on head coaches. Since we're talking about listeners, can we digress briefly to do some thank yous and some ad reads for our generous folks? Oh, we've got a very elaborate one that I need to warm up for, so. You'll get started. I'll get started on that. I'm going to start with this one. Well, no, I'm going to start with some shoutouts.

Amongst the many, many donors to our charity drive, we have Lucas Allen, Dan Agabetti, Kenny Capner, Jordan and Tiffany Richardson. Thank you all for your extreme generosity, and that's with two X's because that's how big it was. We appreciate everything you did. There's, yeah, I think everything on here, there's one we can do without a voice, but everything else requires some voice work. God, y'all are demanding, but it's fine to do. It's fine.

I'll start with this one. This is from Evan. Oh, this is the coach-old here. Give it a shout out to Jake Kopenik. Jake, thank you for listening to the full cast. I hope you listen to it on the bus going to and from to work. I hope you listen to it on the airplane. You know, they say you got to turn the phone into airplane mode, but that's a lie.

I turned it on. The phone's still a phone. Don't turn into a plane at all. That's false advertising. How you're going to sell me a transformer with airplane mode that don't even turn into a plane? I got my lower Optimus Prime attorney-in-law. He's going to get you. He going to sue you real good.

He also negotiated my buyout. That's why it's so sweet, because I transform from an interim coach into a coach you want to fire. How'd I do that? That's a good trick, ain't it? Oh, ho. Wow, Coach O. I was going to say, Coach O'clock. Cochow turns his phone into airboat mode.

Why is there a huge fan? Oh, I'll show you. The ringer goes off of like 100. Right? Everything's super loud so you can hear through the ear protection. Why do you even have that? Oh, that's so I could. have the phone to find a gator.

The phone is that loud, but you can still hear him just fine. Just Coach O's voice at actual volume. Yeah, Spencer, are you ready to do yours? Man, this is so demanding. Come on. We're going to do it, though, because we did it for charity, okay? And then I'm going to need, like, seriously, I'm going to need like a two or three minute break.

Like, I'm going to do this. I'm going to play it. That's fine. And then I'm going to disappear for two or three minutes because you'll need a little, you'll need some tea with honey. after this. You'll need a big bowl of chili after this. I need a big bowl of chili.

I can't remember anything. Okay, this is requested by at Jacket Dan on Twitter. Yep. Yep. And what he requested was in exchange for his very generous donation, he would like me to sing up with the white and gold, the fight song for Georgia Tech. he would like me to sing it in Alex Jones voice okay now it won't be singing

it won't exactly be Alex Jones but I'm going to try it okay hopefully with the fight song playing along behind it oh wow okay even you all right so we're gonna we're gonna try it I need to make sure I have everything rigged up here yeah yeah the technical aspects are the most important of this podcast we don't get anything wrong so here we go you know just be able to hear it in the background, just a little bit while I yell. Okay? So now it's up with the white and gold, down with the red and black.

Georgia Tech is out for all victory. We'll drop our battle acts of Georgia's head goblins. When we meet her, our team will Shirley beat her. Don't know the Georgia's pardon. There'll be no sound when our bowels to the air. when the battle is over Georgia's team will be found with the yellow jackets

swarming round you global sons of bitches oh man that was beautiful that was wonderful this was a tough one because it's impossible to even

imagine Alex Jones singing all he does is scream like even the national Even the National Anthem, I don't think he could do. You okay, buddy? I'm going to go get some water. Get you a big ball. Get you some dehydrated manhood capsules.

Just dunk those in some defloridated hydrogen capsules. All of this available at Alts. At infowars.com slash store. Um, InfoWords is not a sponsor of the shutdown forecast. Oh, God. Oops. Let's see. Um, we got a couple more here. Either of these, well, one of these I have to do, I guess. All right. I'm off the hook.

All right. Well, uh, first, Ryan Prochuk, uh, would like to confirm that Wisconsin drunk exists on the spectrum and it doesn't wear off until Wednesday. Yeah. I, Wisconsin drunk is, is, is, wazoo drunk probably is the, like, furthest from resting state to peak drunk, it's like the, the, the, it's the airplane that you're like, whoa, we went up to 40,000 feet, and then we landed. Wisconsin drunk is more like, yeah, I live on a mountain, and sometimes I take a helicopter to go up even higher, but like, I'm always, I'm always very above sea level. Let me make that clear. In this case, sea level is a 0.0 blood alcohol content level.

You're never there, Wisconsin. you'll never go back. They'll never take you back to sobriety. They can't. And then this is from Blanks, longtime EDSVS, commenter, Twitter, ne'er-do-well. And this allows us to get back into game previews

because at 7.30, the Michigan Wolverines who decided to take last week off because every gentleman needs rest from his pursuits. No need to be playing constantly. Must attend to my many minds and other businesses of investment.

We'll play our most reviled rivals, the Michigan State Spartans. A team named after a bunch of Greek failures. Interesting. Interesting choice of mascot we are named after a mighty

beast that is allowed in restaurants with or without pants as we are because we own the restaurant. But you you, Michigan State, do you even know what the restaurant is? I suspect you just stumble into a grocery store, just start eating some

jerky. It seems like you're Steeze, as you might say. Maybe you are worried about this game looking in Michigan's quarterback situation. I assure you, Michigan quarterback is the only form of monarchy still alive in the

United States. We have a succession plan. We will find a young Spanish boy who is part of the lineage. He's Chad Henney's illicit stepson. He will start and quarterback and lead us to victory.

Oh man, those mongrels at Michigan State, they don't know what they're in for. What? Oh, man. What among the evening games intrigues you most, Jason? Hmm. Well, so first of all, we should note that we're trying a new recording method, which is me using some phone app. Therefore, I'm walking around in the backyard and not looking at the schedule. But let me try and call it to mine from memory. All right. Here, here. I'll throw some at you. You tell me if you want to talk about her. not okay i'm gonna help you okay alabama at texas a n m 7 15 oh no no next okay all right um virginia tech at

boston college 715 next i'm just these are these are i'm looking these off waiting for a good pitch wisconsin at nebraska eight o'clock i mean maybe if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if you give Wisconsin, like one turnover, that game's over. Okay. Washington State at Oregon, 8 o'clock. Yes. Yes. I'm slinging at that one. So this game, you got, Washington State is emerging as a true Pact 12 North contender facing their first road game of the year.

It is October, their first road game of the year. Oregon, we don't really know what to make of yet, but looking pretty good overall. And if you go by the win projections for the season as a whole, this could end up being the most important game of the week since both of these teams are projected about 8 and 4, 9, and 3, meaning the winner, you know, as like an outside shot at a, say, a New Year's 6 bid. So, you know, this could end up being a pretty important game in the long run.

And it should be, you know, pretty wild and point-seeing and all that. What will finish first? That game at 8 or Stanford at Utah at 1015. oh yeah i like stanford utah as a late game just because we want to be up all that late the pack the pack 12's big 10 game of the year if you instead decide to go with your late game of cal washington just start making breakfast you will it's just easier at that point you're up with us you're up all night to watch pack 12 that's what's happening i would point out, Oregon. Oregon does have one little wrinkle, which is that Justin Herbert has broken

collarbone and is out for quite a while at a quarterback spot. So, so against a not bad, not bad at all. They pressured Sam Darnold plenty, Washington State defense. Yeah, that might be might be a little bit of an issue. Yeah, this does not feel like where Wazoo will veer off course probably yeah it's it's a nice little challenge though yeah

wazoos do for a nice streak of luck in their favor right after just I don't know more than a decade plus of the opposite of that so sure take take an injury stricken duck team if you have to play

him in Eugene take it run with it well they won't run but they will throw all over it we also that's true now What's tough is that we have, in these slots, we have, like, rivalry games of sorts that have kind of been one-sided as of late.

And, of course, I'm talking about Kansas State at Texas. Oh, Texas. Oh, my. You got to, like, if Texas doesn't win this game against a Kansas state team that looks fine, but is definitely not anywhere near the best of Bill Snyder's tennis, year, it's going to start to turn pretty quick. Yeah, after Bill Snyder's long dominion over Texas, not just the Longhorns, but the entire state, if this is his last year, and he goes out beating Texas, what, two years in a row, however many

times in the last five, ten years, I mean, that's one of those things, it's, you know, never forget Bill Snyder went whatever and whatever against Texas. You got to try and end that. Because this is the problem. Texas, if you lose the Kansas State, here are your next four games. Oklahoma

at the state fair. Home against Oklahoma State at Baylor. So good on you for that one. And at TCU. This is, oh, boy. Even after that, like, you play West Virginia on the road near the end of the year. You play a surprisingly feisty Texas Tech team to end the season.

The road to bowl eligibility right now for a two-win Texas team, it's very slippery. It's very, very slippery if they don't beat this Kansas State team. If they get that win, it feels like, okay, they can get to six. If they don't, mm-rah! Who want, you know what? Tom Herman's a family man, and the holidays are about seeing your family anyway. Why would you want to go to some

Dusty Bowl game? This is better for you. He just cares about you. He cares about you having a better relationship with your dad. This will give you more time to pick out of the perfect Christmas present for him. What are you going to get him? Hopefully not a season highlight DVD. Can I

ask you to pick the game that you think will have the most combined points between the two teams? Are we... Of any games, of any game this weekend. I'm just letting you loose. Early, mid, late schedule, Thursday night game. whatever i have is i have a suspect and it's a glaring one and i don't know if anyone else has an answer that could rival it because everyone might go oh yeah that tc u nope nope nope nope nope um that's

not my pick what would you what would you pick well wazoo oregon was interesting until the quarterback injury um cow washington is a little bit interesting but cal's been better on defense than they have been in the past. And Washington, I mean, Washington did give up a lot of points to Ruckers. So there's that. I don't know. What do you got in mind here? Last year, these two teams met on November 12th.

Oh, no, he missed it. Oh, there it is. You missed it. And in a noon game at Heinz Field in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, the Syracuse Orange and the Pittsburgh Panthers combined for a, 37 points in a 61 76 pit win, which you're not going. By the way, that was regulation. That's not O.T. They did that in regulation. There were 47 points scored in the fourth quarter. Good God. So I just think with dynamics having gotten even looser on the defensive side for the Pittsburgh Panthers,

Syracuse. Syracuse probably improving a little bit overall in terms of efficiency on offense. I don't think you're looking at anything different, right? Pitt may not score as many points. They're not as good on offense as they were, but... But Syracuse might score more, so... Yeah, yeah. So that would be my pick overall for the over of all overs this weekend.

The other one, I mean, this is a little bit lopsided, but I can see UCF Cincinnati going that way. And that's really just a way to talk shit about Cincinnati because, yeah, y'all, you got lit up by Marshall. That's the thing that happened. You are not looking great this year, Sinci. And UCF is pretty well put together right now. So because it's a combined score, yeah, you know what?

65 to 14, that's a pretty high. combo, isn't it? Good God. That's amazing. I would also say look for our friends at East Carolina. Oh, man, you know, it'll get your defense back on track because East Carolina's like got a legendarily bad defense and giving up like 50 points a game this year. They've already fired their defensive coordinator.

You know who they face this year, this week? Temple. Yeah, we'll have that right. Temple's going to run loose on you for 20. That might be the worst game of the year so far. Hold on. There's a lot of candidates for that. You calm down.

I don't know. There's a lot of candidates. But you know what? Bookmark Illinois, Iowa might. Illinois, Iowa, I'm really hoping that you guys are right. And then we get some sort of epic five, two and a half game. Yeah, I'm not going to watch. I'm not going to watch that game.

Not one better. I like, I really like San Diego State as our like closeout team of the year. It feels like every week of the season so far, they've won like a Big Ten West game or an SEC East game that like goes down to the wire and it's like 14 to 12.

Like you got... 2417. That's the score for every San Diego State game. If you averaged out every football game ever, the final score that you got which is probably like 2418 or something, that's every San Diego State game. And you have that up against

back to move after dark And that's how we close out Every single Saturday How did Missouri, Kentucky get a night game slot? That way no one would have to see it