Shutdown Fullcast - Thank God for the College Football Playoff Committee

Episode Date: October 14, 2026

Lads talk about a new concert film from The LadsMike Elko, please don't argue with a message boardJon Sumrall has committed an unforgivable sinArch Manning is a perfectly normal college quarterbackWeek 7 college football schedule, previewedThe Shutdown Fullcast is on Patreon. This is how we pay our producers, and occasionally ourselves. If you'd like to help with that, give us $4 a month (or a larger, funnier number of your choosing) and we'll give you bonus episodes, including Fullcast After Dark during football season. We think this is a pretty good deal (for you)The Shutdown Fullcast is produced by delicious and energizing Monster Energy Master Chief Michael Ray Surber Fullcast theme variant arranged and performed by Corey CunninghamPurchase exclusive Shutdown Fullcast gear at preownedairboats.com, real website, not a trapThrough December 31, all proceeds from our PTKU merch collection will be donated to Harbor CampsWhen they're not ruining the Fullcast, Spencer and Holly write a year-round newsletter over at Channel 6Before the world ends (again), treat yourself to Jason’s critically acclaimed novel and other workCheck out Surber’s band, Killer Antz (new album out now!), and listen to Podcasterino

They might say we no longer hate each other, and that would be like an expression of passionate love for each other, you know. But yeah, so they spent $70 million making this movie. Wait, that was a $70 million movie? Dude. Do you know? They have a million dollar documentary? Yeah, a concert. It's most, to Jason, yes, it's mostly a documentary, but it's like a concert film, too.

I didn't see the Taylor Swift Erez tour, but the. impression I got of what that concert film was like was behind the scenes footage from the tour as well as best of performances from that tour. So that's what this was. I feel like it was following that lead. But it's also like every concert scene is fully shot. And by that I mean, if you were shooting a show, you'd probably have, right? Like you'd have three cameras, maybe four, right? If we're real slick, we have a drone going overhead. But you know, you're The Europeans do it a little differently, which is probably why this was easier for Oasis to conceptualize, too. Yeah, I think it helped. Because of the coverage at Glastonbury and Tia in the Park, like these big festivals over there, they are productions, but they're not film productions to your point. Right. So, you know, you've got stage left, stage right, overhead back.

And then maybe you have a drone. And then it's like how many can you afford to put in the pit based on level of festival? Right. or outside or getting B-roll or C-roll, right? What you need to know is that the American concert footage is shot by the guy who did moonlight, the cinematographer who did moonlight. That seems like overkill.

It is not because I'm not done. The guy who did the Euro shows was the cinematographer for the brutalist. All right? They have, it's four continents, four continents, at least five different units. Like we were going through the credits, like, how the fuck?

did they make this? And you're going through the credits and it's not like second unit. It's like fifth unit, third unit Korea. Like just a ridiculous number of people on this thing. Imagine being so annoyed with your brother that when the day comes that you can hang out with him again, it inspires film crews to follow you around the world, numerous of them. Apparently, in an interview with the filmmakers, when this happened and they said, hey we should make a documentary about it they called them like these guys like the cinematographers i'm talking about said hi i see there's a rose bowl show who's shooting that because that's going to be me like they didn't have to most of these people just fucking volunteered to do it yeah it's fucking

great is what i'm saying and it looks incredible they were like man you two guys have hated each other for so long mm-hmm that we are going to be there when you no longer hate each other officially. Well, the other thing is that that was a very volatile relationship, it might not have happened, and they lined up all of this shit, like, you know, $70 million or whatever.

It could have not happened. It might have just fallen apart in the middle of it, and it didn't. Well, then you have an even better show. Yeah, well, then... Yes, and no. They actually show that... They actually have concert footage

from the Paris show where they did. did not, where they finally could not show up together. Where there was like, no, like, we're very sorry. I just be desoulet, you know, the show in, you know, a cancelé. They didn't do that show? Oh, no, there was a show in 2011 or 2009, I think.

It's the last show. It's the one where in Paris where they're supposed to show up and play. Before the split or what? Yeah, yeah, this is the final split. Oh, so it's old footage. Yeah, it's old footage, but they have footage from that concert. And the people are like, What?

Like, yeah. No, like, sometimes one would show up. Sometimes both would show up. That night, it's like, we're very sorry. No one's showing up. One thing I noticed in this documentary, and I think it's because of the nature of what that split was like, how they talked about one another afterward, and like how online or aware of the British, like, rags you were that were writing about them nonstop for 10

years. The people who are under 30 at the concerts are, like, having an amazing time. and look like they're at one of the best concerts they've ever been to, right? They're all singing along to every song. Some are crying, but mostly they are like just the, it's like one of the most joyful experiences. Pretty much everyone over the age of 30 is in utter shock. Like they just look like they are crying. They are, they are having a religious experience.

It's like, it's like they've taken the, they haven't, but their faces are those of people that have taken the heaviest drugs imaginable. and like one guy at one point there's a man in a Manchester City jersey just on his knees. It's the praying guy. He sings along. I can't remember which song he's singing along too. But it's just, it's so funny because like I didn't think they were ever going to play together again. And like the vibe is like of tens of thousands of people at these stadiums to see them. Everyone who's our age is like they didn't think they were going to show up.

There was like a big part of them that clearly still can't believe that. they're actually on the stage. They didn't fucking break up before this show. Like every show had to have felt like they're not, this is going to be the one. This is going to be the one. They come out. Then they're like, they're just like,

no, we fucking hate each other again. Ha ha, got you. Surprise. Going to have another reconciliation tour in six years. It'll be even more expensive. Take your money then.

You got to book the breakup tour and then the second reunion tour. You can really milk this. It's an especially awesome thing. I like as a like fan of that genre of mute like the what the broad range of rock and roll as a genre of music to like witness oasis a band from the mid 90s who is um like split generationally between like elder millennials and and the tail end of like gen X like they feel like one of the last rock straightforward like rock bands that will ever be that big like I saw a video recently of ACDC's like last performance at MetLife. It's pretty rough. Yeah, but like at the same time, there's so many people there and I'm looking, I'm like, okay, that's like the last of that.

There's not many of that era left. Like, yeah. And it was, it's almost like, okay, the stones are out there. McCartney's touring. Like, but those are the only acts playing like just rock and roll that are like still filling up stadiums the way that like, to my mind, only like Taylor Swift, Beyonce. Yeah. a handful of other people can do.

And it's like Oasis dropping in with mid-90s, like, just the most guy rock, like, I punch a clock, like, shit. And like, the lyrics to Oasis songs are not abstract in any way, like in the way, like, they're just like, I believe in us. We'll make it. Yeah. Like, I was listening to them and I was like, there are two things. One, everyone's far more emotional than I expected. This is great. I love it.

some most repressed, like, Caucasian shit you've ever seen in your life, which turns out to actually have an appeal well beyond its original intended audience, as the documentary shows. But if you have guys who haven't spoken to each other for like 15 years and they do this music that was key to a very particular time in people's lives, and those people do not express emotions in any other portion of their life. When you get 30,000 of them in one place, it's over. It's over. And I think they're the only one.

Like there's from every era there's been a bunch of people that do the this thing and that are that big in rock but like I think they might be the only one like counting crows is only going to play amphitheaters right like even Pearl Jam is like an arena band I don't think they can sell out a stadium tour across the world like if they have recently that would surprise me but like they showed up there's like like football stadiums yeah like food fighters did that last time and I don't think their yeah tours are like like selling out and the way that OASISAs were. Green Day's last one wasn't like in a little stadium big. Yeah, those guys are much better suited to just sell out an arena. Like, Weezer's doing that. They're selling out arenas. And that's awesome. That's still like massive success.

Metallica is on that list. Yeah, but they're the 80s one. That's the thing. They're of that. Maiden can do that, I think, maybe. Not even Maiden really, I guess. Like, Metallica is one of the ones on the list from the 80s, and they might be the last of that era that, like, people

are willing to still go do that. It's a racist. And like 2000s don't really have one. There's so many like super popular bands that would like sell out amphitheaters in like arenas like My Chemical Romance. Paramore. But I don't know that like Haley's quite got,

is she with the Taylor bump is maybe Paramore the 2000s band that's going to be selling out stadiums consistently in America? They're not that big. No. No, no. I think if there was a big, like, Paramore MCR, like, that whole wave together to where they could probably do it.

Because, like, MCR is very, very long tail. The kids love them, you know, same way. Yes. Yeah. But they don't have, but they don't have. Yeah, it's not. I'll say, I'll tell you, they don't have a central narrative. That's the thing.

Because I didn't really realize. Oh, they do. They do. Okay. Because without 9-11, you wouldn't have MCR and you wouldn't have to go to Dakota Johnson taking down Ellen DeGeneris. and the teens have this little Gen Z arc of history that filters through my chemical romance. Which is sick. That's great.

Me too. That's awesome. I do love, though, that like because there are two brothers who fight, right? Because there are two brothers who fight, it anchors the entire thing. And if you take two brothers that fight, it's very professional wrestling. And they come out on stage and no one's sure what's going to happen. And then one of them, literally this happens, Jason. raises the arm like, yeah, the champs are back.

Raises the arm like they're the young bucks. And they raise the arm. And you go, oh, okay, I know what this is. I've seen this before. Because, like, two brothers that's built-in best friends, worst enemies, and you can change it day to day, and it doesn't matter, right? Like, any pair of brothers, siblings in wrestling, it's like, why are they feuding?

Because they're brothers. That's right. Why are they back together? Because they're brothers. Yeah. Why don't they talk? They're dudes. you know there's a lot of that you know why instead of talking about this are they making this

everyone's 70 million dollar problem because they're brothers yeah because they're brothers also they'll they'll eventually make that money back don't don't worry they're good you what they just got divorced they'll make it back don't worry they'll make it back that's by the way never mentioned in the documentary is that one of the reasons i'm pretty sure this happened in addition to uh was that uh was that noll was getting divorced he's like oh man broke yeah real broke. How can I not be broke anymore? I'm broken. I'm sad. And his daughter said, why don't you call

your brother? Well, like, I think that's the other thing, too. I think, like, it's the ultimate uncle move to, like, piss off your sibling and be like, I'm going to be really cool to their kids. Like, their kids are going to fucking love me. The kids are going to fucking love me. Always talk nicely.

Just, I want them to constantly roll there. I want, I won't know to roll his eyes. constantly when his daughter talks about how awesome the weekend was with Liam. Uncle Liam's the best. You're like, Uncle Liam used to do so much Coke, he didn't show up for shows. You know, what dad was trying to pay the bills. Not my problem. Check out what he just bought me.

Yeah. What a cool guy. Wasn't it Liam or Noel, though, that just disappeared in the, in like the Midwest that one tour, like on their first American tour? That was Noel, wasn't it? I think it was no. Yeah. No.

Oh, yeah. No, he went out to San Francisco. Yeah. He just fucking bolted on. Yeah, exactly like Dennis Rockman. It was around the same time. That's probably how he got the idea. They were probably both in Vegas.

Yes. But yeah, listen, all you need to know is that, listen, you have some collaborators. It's a very important lesson from this documentary. You have some collaborators. They're just going to show up 20 minutes before. It's fine. It's fine. Like, that's it.

They're like, I hope he shows up. They shows up for the show. He will. He says, like, no warm up. no warm up nothing absolutely fucking rocked it yeah the best is the rehearsal I sorry I hope I didn't miss this

when they're doing the rehearsals at the beginning Jason and they're all just kind of waiting for him to show up he shows up he's like let's go and then they immediately start and then he sings his last line of the last song and as they're doing the outro his brother just gives him the thumbs up

and he's like nods and just leaves while they're finishing just he's jets baby He just shuts right out. Done. No, goodbye, no nothing. Picks up his duffel bag and goes.

Got my shit in. And the door closes. Yeah. And that's how they know they're okay. There's no, he's not worried about it. He says, like at the end, they finish and he goes, we'll show on Monday, right? Yeah. Monday's the show.

Monday's like, like they go through like months of rehearsal and Liam's like, I'll be there a little bit. Then shows up for the show, absolutely annihilates. It's just like, oh, there's the rock star. Rock and roll is not hard. See? All you got to do is do it. This was the spurious thing.

What are you going to do? I'm going to call some ball plays. Don't you need to practice another nine hours? We're good. We already did. We already did. Look at them. Don't your players need to practice?

Look, they're big and strong. They have. This is the Craig Signetti thing, too. Yeah. What? Like, it's hard? They're all punching each other in the head for 25 hours a week. Maybe we'll do like nine.

That's enough. Yeah. Do you not understand the concept of punching someone in the head? Well, when all your players are 25, they've already done enough head punching. Let's just play football. Yeah, that's it. I got a bunch of old men here. They got union cards, brother.

I'm going to get in trouble with them. Overtime? We ain't paying that. Nah, no. Hell no. Hell no. To the shutdown full cast. You are listening to the internet's only college football podcast.

Oh, man, why are you doing that? I don't care. It's great that you are. Keep doing it. I am Spencer Hall joined today by Jason Kirk. What's up? and Michael Server. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. We are going to be running up without Holly today, who is out, and that is okay because we have a lot to talk about. Next man up. Next man up. That's right. That's the mentality we have on this team. It's mid-season, man.

That's why we signed all these people. That's why we have this roster, all this NIL. That's right. That's right. You know what? And where personnel won't do, we're going to have to rely on prayer. I received this over. I thought you were going to say like scheme.

Scheme? Nope. Nope. We're past that. Oh, listen. Again, remember. Dabbo coaching tree. Yeah. Only scheme I need is that triple option, father's son and the Holy Ghost. That's it. West Virginia has the worst defense in the country. And the defensive coordinator, Zach Alley, when asked how he's dealing with having the worst defense in the country. Props to the reporter for asking that, by the way, in that exact tone.

because I'm sure for him it is a spiritual crisis. He's probably like when you have the worst defense in the country and you are a football coach, you're probably nauseated. He's a Clemson grad too, so it's everything spiritual. Yeah, yeah. So I'm glad you recognize that because he says that per Mike Asty, he's leaned on prayer and talked with the pastor who married him and his wife after the Arizona loss. And Ali said that help a lot.

Tom Allen's follow up. I mean, what else is there to do here? What else you got? When your defense is so bad, you're resorting to prayer. Your defense is so bad that your offense did something that should have allowed it to stay on the field for like five hours. And yet you lost by 20-something points. Yeah. Yeah.

You know who is number one in defense and yards per play? I just know. ahead of North Dakota State, Wisconsin, Notre Dame, Michigan, and Ohio State is Florida International? The brick wall of Pit Bulls Panthers. Huh. Willie Simmons, let's go. Huh. They're number, okay.

The only team to gain more than four yards on them, barely, was Buffalo. They must be incredible. This is my like, like, my old miss must suck take because Florida beat them. Like if Buffalo got actual yardage against them. Yeah, but nobody else did. Also, they're playing tonight, so by the time people are listening to this, if you will have done something to change that number. Brought it down, brother.

Yeah, fuck you, Jack State. Yeah. That's right. You don't, you don't, listen, you don't come to pit bull stadium and expect to gain a yard. Period. Period. That is a football fact I did not know. But this is mid-season.

There are a lot of things that are a lot of things that are revelations every single day that I am learning. For instance, I learned that Mike Elko, the only Ivy League graduate I know of as an SEC head coach is the dumbest one. Because he's decided to feud with Tex-Ags. And that was a card that I preseason would not have pulled a bet that I would not have made. odds would not have been on the board for Mike Elko to start a short-lived feud with Tex-Ags. How would you best explain text-Ags to the layperson, Jason? We talked about this a bit during after dark, but just to bring anyone who missed it up to speed since there's been a development. I mean, it's the single biggest, the internet's single biggest independent team message board.

And it is very heated. It is not a gentle discussion. There's a whole politics board. Lots of people go on it just to discuss, you know, which ethnicity to blame for gas prices or whatever. Yes. Very, very big, very influential message board. Billy Lucci, if you make a documentary about Texas A&M, for instance,

the Mansell one, he just appears, and he should because he's just always around. Coach is coming to go. Texax is forever. Elko did refer to them as Billy Sestpool. and now says he came out on the 12th and said that he I think everyone knows I have a tremendous relationship with Billy I appreciate Billy I appreciate him being here today there's nothing about him and I that have ever been off since 2018 I think everybody knows I appreciate our fan base and everything they're about and everything that they mean to Texas A&M outside of that

I'll leave it alone. I regret the way that it was taken. I regret the way that it came out. I regret the way it ran. That certainly was never my intention. At no point did I ever lend any blame to anything other than myself. I am the reason why this team is struggling. Yeah. Well done, Billy. That's good. You have you got enough knives pointed at you right now. Let's just let's just push. one more off to the side. I would, you know, I would like to know what the comment that set off the initial cessable comment was. We'll probably never find out. But, you know, um, ain't that's three and three, man. Three and three. Three and three. It's not a good thing. You got more problems than, uh, you got so many problems. You don't need to be making up problems. And, you know, this is about all you can do to get rid of the current problem. I don't think they're even America's best three and three team. I think, you know, that's clearly little. Let's see here. Let's look that up.

I think Louisville is put in a lot of... Actually, we... I think if you check the numbers. We did the same thing a week or two ago looking for two and three. And at the time, the best two and three team was South Carolina. The best three and three team per the numbers is South Carolina. Well, I believe that... Followed by A&M in Louisville.

There we go. Okay. Yeah. So evidently A&M is a better three and three team than I thought. But not as good as South Carolina, I believe that. I think, by the way, there's only so much... credit you can mine off Florida and we'll find out exactly because Texas won't budge after beating us this coming Saturday. That's like South Carolina. It was like, well, it's a good three and three team. Texas will beat us. We're like, that's what should happen. The best team with a losing record appears to be two and three TCU. That I don't believe. The numbers are lying.

Well, somebody's got to be. Somebody. They might be the only two and three team, you know. There's a bunch. There's 13 of them. Damn. Best one in four team. Let's find. The best one is... That would be... Rutgers.

113th in the country for the computers. That's... That's bullshit. Kinesaw State's one and four. Way better than Rutgers. We're the second best. We're the second best. Syracuse took our quarterback, man.

But then they also gave us a quarterback, so I can't really blame them. I mean, straight up if you had to pick between Rutgers and Kennesaw State in a game, who are you taking? owls yeah um it's a lot closer than it should be emotionally just based on who we lost you know like last year you know it would have been a much clearer choice yeah us us obviously i'm gonna go ahead and just take the owls because i like chaos i'm gonna i'm gonna feel much better about myself even if i know that records will probably end up winning just out of curiosity if you have it in front of you jason amongst the what is it charlotte 49ers um there's

three winless teams, I think. N-IU and then there's one more. ULM. ULM. Yeah, which one of them is the best winless team, can you tell you? Or is the stat of the sixth game for Charlotte throwing us off? In the computers, NIU is 134th ahead of the others.

The bottom two are Charlotte and Sacramento State. I just wanted to close the book on that. Yeah, I'm glad. Thank you. I'm glad we got there. Actually, let's see, the worst four-win team. Hmm. Hmm.

Oh, this is bullshit. I'm playing anymore. It's UMass. Numbers are liars. Bullshit. I don't take anything else you've told me seriously now. All of us was wrong. Disgraceful.

You and your analytics. Sometimes it's about the eye test, man. And the eye test tells me, UMass is phenomenal. I think I speak for all of us when I say, thank God for the college football playoff committee. I know they will scrupulously evaluate what's actually happened on the field. as far as UMass is concerned. I regret to inform you,

UMass passes the eye test. I don't know how they did it. They looked average and passed the eye test. Just 20 real out of touch people somewhere in a holiday and express conference room jacked off of cheap muffins and other continental breakfast fair. Looking at them in November and going, how can we say no?

You know, when you get a seven and five, team in the Mac that started 4 and O. I mean, I took one look at Pop Watson and said, they didn't settle for the second. They got Pop Watson the third. And that's how I know they're a quality team. I also wanted to point out that a 13-year-old will absolutely, a 13-year-old child, your own will roast you in ways that you cannot possibly be prepared for. John Summerall got a text after losing to that incredible.

best three and three team in the nation, South Carolina. And the text from his son said, Dad, I don't know if this is forgivable. Damn. That means buy me some Roblox stuff. Again, everyone in the world is working for Steam gift cards. That's it. Oregon State football, right?

John Summerall's children. John Summerall's children. Yeah. He said he was 13 going on 30, and I was like, listen. That sounds like the score. in your last game. Yeah. That's the last two games.

Sounds like, we only wish we were that close to Missouri. Wish you held him to 30. Yeah. That would have been great. So just know that there is no escape for John Summerall. Welcome to Hell. Go Gators.

It started awesome. It could get awesome again. It could resume being awesome. It just, it really started awesome. At the moment, it's not awesome. Weather, not awesome. Yeah.

Humidity. Not awesome percent. Not just bad. Just like, really like, did any of that happen? Yeah, just two different teams look like two entirely different teams. That sucks. Yeah. Don't ever put anything on film, kids.

That's it. This would have been a great game before a great team before broadcast television. That would have been amazing. This is another thing that I felt was important to mention. here at the top of the program. Kirby, smart. I don't know if you know this. He has become the first coach to Cuss.

This is great innovation. He tends to use a lot of profanity, particularly when he's talking to his team. People enjoy leaking these speeches. I'm convinced. It's happened like three or four times. That's not a league. If I'm, yeah, somebody's basically,

he's clearly not being cautious. Yeah, he's not, listen, your op-sex sucks. It's probably like, I don't know. The player always pointing a phone at your face. Everybody put your phones awake. Guy has his phone in his hand looking at you. This fucking asshole with the pervert glasses is always leaking Kirby's speeches. Yeah. No more pervert speed. No more pervert glasses in the locker room. They got glasses that record you? Yeah, Kirby. Like, do you think, do you think, God damn it?

Do you think Kirby knows what meta glasses are? Do you think he knows? No. No. No. No. And second, if he heard about them, do you think he would instantly be like, I'm putting him on my linebacker? Yeah. I need to see where his eyes are. I need to tell him what he should have been looking at. If he's going to be my eyes on the field, I need him to be my eyes on the field, right?

Imagine having Kirby, not just in your headset, but behind your eye. Imagine having Kirby Jarvis. Kirby is Jarvis. Like, that's first little linebacker. That's what he's doing, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he can literally, he has all your biological functions, all your senses. He's inside your skull.

let me ask you something is there any way you can shrink me down to the size of a rat and put me inside his helmet Kirby's not just Gerbys, Kirby's aunt man he's, no he's ratatooey yeah fratatooie Gattatooie yeah come on

come on come on but yeah we we despite despite Kirby's despite Kirby's obvious intense understanding of technology and how it works these damn feaks keep getting recorded I don't know how in the hell

the things I say in one place end up being visible elsewhere like literally doesn't understand video technology unless it's film right yeah you know Kirby it's it's kind of like when you put a video play a video on your phone on a what

what the hell are you talking it's it's kind of like a tiny movie that you put what in the fuck is a movie Kirby Kirby and Will both have that thing where they'll just negative they'll neg down a question until there's no knowledge contained in it whatsoever

Sound like the dumb ass for not knowing what they don't know Right Making you sound like the fancy boy aristocrat Who's heard of things Look at this fucking nerd That's so gay that you've heard of things That's what it is It's like the oldest jock move in the world

Right though with those two, I believe it. Oh, I believe it. You like stuff, loser. I believe they've never heard of anything. There are people who LARP is not knowing, you know, of like, oh, I'm too macho to know what that is. There are people who do that. I believe those two have never heard of anything.

Hey, Coach Muscham, what do you think about pegging? Pegging? I don't know anything. Is that a craft? That's got to be a pre-snap adjustment term. And also a post-snap, if you know it. But like, that's definitely going to be like, Well, when you see three wide, you're going to peg to that, you know, it's got to be some sort of a term he's heard.

Yeah, I'd be like, I think that was, you know, we don't face the run and shoot. We don't face the run and shoot so much, so we don't really have to line up like that. So we don't do a lot of pegging. We don't do a lot of pegging. You know, that's, that would, if Kirby was like, had the moment where his face slipped a little bit, was like, huh? Oh, no, no, I don't know what that is. No, not at all. What are you talking about?

It's crazy. Dana Holgerson just going. Baptist. Yeah. But yeah, we keep hearing Kirby's speeches. Delightful to me because all Kirby does is just do exactly what you think a coach would do, right? Like, I like beating ass. You, you should beat some ass.

I want you to beat some ass. Where those guys over there, we're going to kick their ass. That's the summary of every. They said they wanted ass versus ass. And we had more ass. Yeah. It's just that it's like, they say they're strong. We're much strong.

longer. Yeah. Fuck them. They would like to win this game. I propose, then we win it. Yeah. You're not going to allow them to do that. No.

This one, he was unhappy that it leaked, unlike the previous ones. This one, you know, and like the obviously the main thing there is they might have to play Alabama again. And like, you know, Bama has in the same years had a history of just inventing bulletin board material. You can just play this fucking video. But it's like there's also the thing where around like in their practices all over campus, you can hear him on a bullhorn every practice. Every day on TikTok. Every day there's something where Kirby's like, I'm having so much trouble at home. I don't even.

We redid the cabinets. I don't fucking get it. In practice he'll be like 50 yards away from somebody. Hey, motherfucker. And he's on a bullhorn where people in the fucking. fucking Kim Labs are hearing it, right? You stupid fucking dumbass! That ain't what I pay you to, you know.

Yeah. And then like, you know, video leaks and it's like, huh? People can hear me? Unperceivable? But he does, he does some of the most like Old Testament dollar general manager berating his staff shit too, right? Like, if this real life, you know, it's like, if this real life, you'd be fired. You'd be fired.

We'd just, you'd starve. That's what you did. I'd just kill you. I'd kill you right now. That's it. This is my sawmill. I'll take whatever fingers I want. There's a lot of like, there's a lot of that, right?

Like a crooked mayor in a like, uh, town. Like Brad Wesley and Roadhouse. That's like behind the scenes, all of their speeches are basically like, I own the mall and the car dealership. Like that's, that's what coach speech is, right? in between being deeply exasperated to how little control they actually have, right? I will go back to the story where a guy knocked a guy out in the huddle at Georgia out of practice for farting. And Kirby's reaction to it, per the players who witnessed this was, oh, shit. Like, just not like, oh, we can't have this, guys.

But no, no, instead it was like, oh, man, I don't know. We got him coming off the, we got them coming off the, we got them. coming off the field one time. I think it was against Tennessee on the radio broadcast. And as we went down to the sideline, the players were talking some shit. And so you would think most coaches would be like, guys, guys, guys, guys. Kirby just goes, hey, y'all, quit talking all that bullshit. And then goes right to the, hey, what you got?

I can't, oh, fuck, I forget the sideline analyst's name. I can't remember if it was DJ Shockley at the time or not. But just right as soon as they go down, that's the first thing you hear is coach. Hey, y'all quite taking all that bullshit. I mean, immediately code switch to TV voices. Yes. It's a solid, like code switching of a sort is something that I don't think we have to hide at all.

Like Kirby, there's a clip. I do not have the keyboard. I do not have the machinery server if you have it. I have it, yes. You want this? There's a clip from this one that is my favorite piece of Kirby's smart, lunatic coach rage code switching. I have heard yet, and it refers to the first. fact that this was his first victory as Georgia head coach in Tuscaloosa.

I got my first win up in this venture. He also claimed that it was something like Georgia hasn't beaten Alabama here in a hundred years. It's like, it feels like it, sure. Sure. Jason, is that factually accurate? No, quite. Almost off by not quite an order of magnitude, but it feels like it. It feels like it.

Yeah, 2014? 20th, like is that? I think it was, it was about 20 years, I think, something like that. Yeah, it's, it's, it's, point being, it's not a hundred. Yeah, but I mean, to like kind of defend him a little bit, a lot of Georgia fans have kind of just, they blacked out for the whole Mark Rick era until it, until they came out the other side of that. He might not have any recollection of that win over Mike Shula question marks.

They did invent football in 1980 and then retire football in 19. I mean, that's 11 years before Florida had it. So that's really impressive to me. Yeah. Yeah. Personally. Play it one more time, server. I need to hear it. I got my first win.

Up in this bitch. Oh, just, yeah, just go look up what fraternity he was in. That's what he calls it the entire speech. He never says Tuscaloosa, Bryant, Denny, State. Like, he says this up in this bitch. bitch, this fucking bitch nonstop. Yeah, the place

motherfucker. The place he came from. The place he came from. It's never Alabama. It's these motherfuckers. The place he came home from, I should say, but still, the place he was there, he was for a long time. The place where he was for like, what I still, is it, would it be the majority of his career at this point? I'd have to

go back and look. Yeah. Actually, now the thing about, he's got a lot of wins up in that bitch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Just not as not as the opposing coach. Right? Or as a player. Yeah, this is, he's got plenty of wins there. It's just for them. Right? Well, at the time, it was this lady back when it was hit back to me. Yeah, this lady. That was up in this bitch. So please just imagine. Just imagine that Kirby's smart, you know, and go look up what fraternity he's in. And now he's open this bitch. This is this is always going to sound wrong to my ear, man. It does not matter. But I look forward to next weeks where, I'll be where we get to hear. And if anyone's recording this,

such as you with those weird glasses. Yeah, you with the weird glasses, are you holding up your phone right now? And it's like, it'll be KJ. Bolden, right? KJ. Bolden, they'll be like, what? They're playing Auburn, a team they don't like. So that seems,

that seems fruitful for, for post-game content. It does. We can find all sorts of motivation, right? Like, yeah, these guys want to beat you. No! No. No. I think you should beat them by being physically superior.

No. The rare and innovative, be tougher than the opponent's speech. How dare anyone leak this secret? That's all I'm saying. You know, speaking of secrets, I have one to share with all of you. We're going to play a little game. I have not ridden any of this down. I'm literally just looking at the passer rating rankings from 2026.

For each quarterback I name, I want you to tell me whether they rank above or below Arch Manning, all right? Okay. Nebraska's rowdy, rowdy white boy. Anthony Colandrea. More. I'm going to say that Anthony Colandrea has a better passer rating. He has a better passer rating than Arch Manning.

and he also also unlike archmany where's the du rag and went to a different fraternity based i'm going to get i'm going to conclude there i'm just going to get do you think do you think anthony colandrea realizes he's not in a fraternity like like is he in a club that here at an hbcc you like nebraska more of a family and familia

yeah i hang out with some guys we have fast cars and sometimes we pull heist No, you don't. Actually, we do. Yeah. How about the NC State quarterback, C.J. Bailey, who was put in the position to do the end zone thing a few weeks ago. His has got to be lower, I think. No, I bet his is better. Well, he starts games like 16 for 16.

Right. He plays very badly after that. He has good games, man. Like, CJ, I'm going to say this, and somebody's going to be like, that is absolutely not true. But I'm going to propose a controversial thing. most starting quarterbacks are really good. That's why they're starting. And I think C.J. Bailey is a good college quarterback.

If you put C.J. Bailey in a place where he had more support in terms of skill players, line and defense, you would go, man, C.J. Bailey is really good. I think absolute value C.J. Bailey is good. Yeah. I just don't know if his quarterback rating because of the people around him is better than our man. He's chosen to. Yeah. Yeah. That's the issue. But I'm curious. CJ Bailey's pass-a rating is better than Arch Manning's God damn, yes

How about Demand Williams Who tried to leave Washington and stayed And Washington isn't very good I haven't watched any Washington football this year I have and I will say that DeMond Williams Passer rating is worse than Arch Manning's Demand Williams' past the rating is better than Arch Manning's Oh no

How about Sam Levitt who has has thrown an interception in every, excuse me, excuse me, at least one interception in every game so far. For LSU. I'm going to go ahead and, uh, I'm going to be right one of these times. His is worse than Arch Mannings. Sam Levitt and his eight interceptions, uh, his past rating is better than Arch Manning's. Wow. Um, another, another, another, another rowdy, white boy, uh, Beau Purbula, Virginia.

Yeah, it's funky. Yeah, got to be right eventually. His has got to be lower. They have not played very well. I'll say better. Actually, quite a bit better. Significantly better than Arch Fanning. Let's see here, scrolling.

How about he had just a really, really rough year at UNC last year. Gio Lopez. Oh, oh. Geos, yeah, Gio's fucking killing it. Gio runs the fucking world. now. He's out of the Belichick first. Yes, he's much better.

He's much better. If I'm not mistaken, Gio Lopez's is like, that's a top 30. Yeah, Gio's like best quarterback in the ACC. That's out of Mintsa, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. Mintsa. It depends on actually, let's do this name too, because we've talked about this guy a lot. His erratic entertainment factor, Kevin Jennings.

Oh. You know what? 100% better. Fuck it. I don't care. His quarterback rating in my heart is better. That's it. He ranks number eight. He's way up there.

Like, like, the mistakes are big, but the successes are large. Oh, yeah. No, no, no. Listen, Kevin Jennings is a cornerstone quarterback. If you were, like, he's a cornerstone of a team. You would take him if you could. You're also going to have occasionally have to shore up the whole building when it crumbles. and or something bad structurally happens.

But you know what? You can put them right back in. That's fine. Let us turn to Michael Hawkins of West Virginia. Okay. I know they've been bawling. Hawkins started real hot passer rating-wise. That's, I think he was 11 for 28 this past week.

Yeah. That's probably come down. They've been scoring a lot of points in most games, though, right? They've been running for three. Why'd they run the ball 75 times? Oh, because Michael Hawkins is lower. He's a speculative passer, and I will say this, it's still better than Archmanning. It's still better than Archmanning.

Now he's doing that mostly off of his performance in the first three games, but still. Still, as of this moment, better than Archmanning. Bear Bachmeier is a fullback who is forced to play quarterback, famously where he's number 47. surely he does not have a higher pass rating I would say after this week he put you through for 329 yards and two scores he was balling the fuck out which I have not seen archmanning do so I'm just going to go based on that yeah it's better okay okay yes you're right he does have a higher pass rating than archmanning have we done Alberto Mendoza yet Georgia Tech's quarterback no I'm sorry you mean Fernando

Mendoza last year's quarterback right that Mendoza no no no no this is the other one oh you mean his brother who looks and stands and sort of like it's the same guy. Yeah, but he plays a bit more like Cal Mendoza. So, yeah, it's a little, it's like Frank Stallone's to Sylvester Stallone in the performance. He's been on the move a lot if you can pick up what I'm putting down. He's been distracted in the pocket. Mm-hmm.

When there's a pocket. Yeah. What pocket? Yeah, what a pocket. Yeah. These are jigging, sir. Every. Every play

Every plays a rollout When you're playing behind Georgia Tech's offensive line right now Yeah I will say his is You know what? I'll swallow the hook I'll say it's worse Jason It's better than Archmanning

As far as past radio What? That's the one where I was like no Okay, all right All right. Fun in games, I get it. All right, John Mateer. How dare you talk shit about my legend

the boy, the man, my son. The what? The conductor at the symphony of filth that is Oklahoma football. Could numbers ever possibly really capture the scope of what he means for that team? That man transcends math. But if there were a single formula that could attempt to capture what it is a quarterback does when he throws the ball. Yeah, I'm sorry. Let me show you the John Mateer quotient of excellence.

That's jacked biceps over winning. That's it equals John Mateer. It's wins against Texas this year divided by nothing. Sorry, your quarterback's awesome when he can complete like seven passes and still win. And when you really need him to, like, it's not like, oh, you know, we just, we don't really rely on the past game a whole lot. No. Like you just said, you don't want to put something on film. That applies during a game as well.

Why show them you can complete a pass until you need to? I need to talk to some defensive coaches about this, but what does it like to put on some Jombatier film and go, I don't know. What are we supposed to? What about this is supposed to be replicable? What are we supposed to practice against? You're like, what bothers him?

Everything? Nothing? No, no. I don't. Yeah. What, what, what information? Are we supposed to derive from this? So do we get them to roll left or roll right?

Stay put? I don't know. Does it matter? Either way. I don't know. Is any of this in our control? Yeah. My notes on.

Can we affect this at all? My notes on this are just in wing dings and emojis. I don't know what the fuck to do with him. Shrug. Yeah. You could play cover whatever. I don't care. Play cover nine.

Play cover 11. Play cover zero. It's all the same. It's John Meteer. He's going to do what he's going to do. He's going to do. He's going to do what he's, yeah, listen. Why don't we just sit back and wait for him to throw us the ball?

John Mateer has a better quarterback rating than Arch Manning. He does. 61 to 64 in the rankings. And, you know, I say this not really to shit on Arch Manning. Nothing particularly against the gentleman. I find him incredibly entertaining as a quarterback, which is the highest praise I can give a really any athlete. And some of you have already seen me talk about this as I wrote about it in the newsletter. But I think this led me to, and some of the quarterbacks arch ranks ahead of are equally like lots of big names down there as well.

Ashton Daniels, Jackson Arnold Norris Sellers, Nico, Will Hammond, who Texas Tech tried very hard to replace. J.K.S. You know, like Bryce Underwood is way down there. No. Oh. That one I don't think I could have baited you into. So, like, the point is, I think that this has given me, looking at this, has given me finally sort of a theory of mind for talking about Arch, which is that he is a college football quarterback. Like, we're, you know, we're supposed to think of him as, like, the Manning legacy and the potential number one pick and the squandered this and the wasted that. And the five star, the golden child, the blah, blah, blah.

I'm so sick of him. They're telling me to think about blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. He's a college football quarterback. And I mean that as praise. I mean everything he does on the field, regardless of his last name, is interesting. Steve Sargation said yesterday that if his name was Joe Smith, we wouldn't give him so much shit. Yeah, that's true, and we also wouldn't give him so much money. But, you know, like, I think the thing is he plays like John Mateer.

We love watching John Matier. But something about Arch Manning, and it's not a myth. mystery what it is. It is all the blah, blah, blah, gets in the way of just appreciating that, like, this dude is fucking entertaining. Whether that's good or bad for Texas is none of my problem at all. I don't own any stock in any of that shit.

But, like, him and John Materia were the two most interesting players on that field, and interesting, it is loaded for people who are invested in which team is winning. But Archmanning is a college football quarterback. The highs and the lows all work out, too.

Something pretty average. It's not what Texas is paying for, but that's what entertains me the most, so I am the real winner here. That is correct. What is his QB rating exactly? It is, I just close it, it's like 143. The national average in FBS is 142. So he's literally almost perfectly the most average quarterback in the country. Like everything he does, the highs and lows, it all balances out to like, it basically exactly what you're going to see in any game.

anywhere. And yeah, they're aiming higher than that, but they ain't there. And last year was not much better. Okay, that's interesting because Quinn Ewers, the quarterback who he replaced in 2024, had a 149. This was the guy who, when he was at Texas, in throwing 31 touchdowns and 12 interceptions, had people wearing arch-maning jerseys while. Ewers was in the game like while he was the starter people already had Manning jerseys like yeah

he's a guy and he was at a 149 justice for Quinn Ewers is what I'm saying I mean I think you know clearly this demonstrates that Steve Sarkesian um accumulating five-star quarterbacks top ranked quarterbacks um not much happens like I'm sort of a skeptic on like whether qB developer is really much of a thing I'm pretty skeptical about QB whisperer and like is he doing a good or bad job developing the quarterback I don't know what of that really means anything however I will say when you're a former OC when you come from USC when it's kind of your reputation when you're associated with lots of quarterbacks from a really long time ago you should probably be better than average just throwing the ball and I think at least as much on Sark as it is on at the other thing I read about this yesterday too is um yesterday when you're hearing this is Texas's run game is fucking awful like after they invested millions and millions of dollars in that run game backs and linemen alike oh yeah it is one of the

worst run games in the country and arch runs a little bit but that's not his job that's not his fault so like i'm seeing a lot more sark to blame here than arch myself uh the idea that that in this run first game which football is primarily a run game right um the idea that they are that bad with that much money invested along the line. This is what NIL has given us, by the way, that we can go, oh, man, their offensive lines sucked. Pre-I. NIL, you'd be like, oh, I mean, they're trying real hard. They're developing guys. Yeah, now we can be like, they're trying real hard.

And also, they're very expensive. That's a legit claim you can make here. If Sacks are a quarterback stat, then Arch is doing okay. I want to say he's about average in that category as well. But at the same time, the run thing, the run thing is, is, that's not a play calling thing. We're getting to the stage. We're now six games into the season. And we're getting to the stage where the answer to what is wrong with my football team is this.

You can't do that. Yeah. You know, not like, oh, we got a, you know, we really got to scheme up some good runs or something. Dude, there's no good runs to scheme up. You already know them all. You know them all. If ship Kelly isn't concocting it at Northwestern, you ain't going to come up with it. All you got at this point in the season, right?

Like the time to worry about this was the portal. The time to worry about this was spring practice, you know? And they did. They worried a lot about this in the portal. Yeah. And it still didn't work. Like there might be some dude in a cowboy hat who spent $15 million on this run game. And it's worse.

And it's ass. it's not good it doesn't work Florida like I love like I love any question that I've seen because you know I seek out fellow people in pain on the internet on Florida forums and there's this yeah you go fire the coordinator

I love firing coordinators don't get me wrong love blaming love firing coaches nothing makes me happier than instantly being like what's it going to be like when he's fired oh my life's going to be better it never is it'll feel good yeah it'll feel good for a minute though be like ah fuck you you got to move Now we get a better one.

No, we get a better one. That guy's... Yeah, can't wait to fire that guy, too. You know, like, there's a part of my brain that works like that because I watch sports and I get frustrated. What are you going to do about that? We can't do shit. You can call whatever you want. They can't play past defense.

They can't. Ohio State. Hey, man, that is the best team in terms of total resources, stars on the roster, et cetera. There will be a time this season where they need a yard and can't get it. because their offensive line from time to time flames out in short yardage more so than teams that are more dedicated to the run. And I don't blame them because they have Jeremiah Smith. As Texas's best coach Will Must champ showed, Ohio State might be a little bit one-dimensional. That's quite a hell of a dimension.

Not many people can do anything about that dimension. But if you manage to put seven guys on him and take him away, you might be able to slow that thing down. a bit. Yeah. Or if you miss one pass, that's it. If it's a close game and you miss one pass, because remember Ohio State goes for the jugular in that game. They throw deep and there's one play where the cornerback defends Jeremiah Smith by a thread hanging on by the skin of his teeth. Dear God, please. But he defends him one on one and he does it and then they come up in a short yardage situation and it doesn't go their way. That's that's what happens. And and at this point, Texas isn't going to get better in the run game. Don't wait for a miracle there.

You might face a shit run defense and it'll look like you have. And I'm like that watch this like watch Arches we're got we're we're banging on about Arches passer rating right now. He gets to play Florida next. He gets to play Florida next. He's gonna have the best game of the season. So Florida's defense. I was saying they were when they I don't even know if they'd lost yet and their numbers were shit. Now they've lost twice. Yeah. Just gonna have a phenomenal game. Arch and Cam Colman's it gets hard again but he gets to play florida first yeah so i just know we're saying this this week next week everyone's going to be like man arch has really figured something out yeah he figured out he should play florida

every week yeah yeah and spencer will be like listen he's really really good he's a really really good he's got he's got a great coach he's got a great play phenomenal coach you got how much money they spent on that office played an amazing team like really do they just have a lot more money than we do we're just pretty poor yeah just broke little little florida that's it I got to play the Clemson song. Just sad, pitiful old Florida. I think it's time for podcast business. Podcast business.

What's that business? Podcast business. It's a business. Podcast business. Tom Cruise is digger. And it's a movie about a guy with the shovel and I don't know anything else about it, but it doesn't make much money. Oh, much money.

I got to help out a little bit. Yeah, we got to chip in for old in a R2 and Cruz here. Business time. Patreon.com slash shutdown fullcast is where you can go for our bonus stuff. Yes, we do a lot of stuff. Frankly, based on sheer minutes recorded, we do more there this time of year than we do on this feed. And as we all know, the way to judge a podcast is by how long it is. Therefore, the better stuff is the stuff that we have paywalled, hard, locked it down at patreon.com.

That's where we do the full cast after dark recordings. They've been going up really early Sunday morning. Thanks to server. Thank you, Sarah. That they're there for almost all of you by the time you wake up. Some of you might be people who wake up at like midnight. I've done that before in my life. If you're there, we're almost there for you.

We're really close to there for you. Patreon.com slash shutdown forecast. We also have stuff in the vault that you might not have listened to there yet. Your team might be asked. Like if you're Michigan State fan, you should probably just stop watching football and instead go listen to the old stuff we've already recorded for you there at patreon.com slash shutdown forecast. Additionally, let me tell you about clothes.

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Kill that ad read, man. Bang. I want to talk to you about Channel 6. That's channel dash 6.coast.com.io. That is a newsletter that Holly Anderson and I write. Two things a week for low cost $10 a month. You should subscribe because it's awesome. We give you an entire rundown of everything we want to rank that week in this

of college football. This week we ranked Miami number one because they didn't play football. And that's so smart. If you get a chance to not play football, amazing decision during a season. All right? We moved you up because you were smart enough to take a week off. Rest and self-care is important. Those kind of insights are pregame hangouts on Saturday for subscribers. Sometimes we answer your questions when we get to it. Sometimes there's too much to talk about. But solid promise, usually get like three things a week, honestly, if we're averaging it out. channel dash 6.ghost.i. Oh, server.

My band Killer Ants has a show on Saturday at the Den and Winston-Salem. And you can check out my other productions at Hand in the Dirt. Podcast Reno is a podcast that I do sometimes. And then Phantom Island.com. Check out my stuff I do with Ryan Nanny and Stephen Godfrey. Well, they do it. I just added it. You're still there.

You still do it. I'm there. Actually, I take all credit for. frankly yeah really the brains of the operation and this one yeah damn that brains everywhere useless stephen godfrey and ryan nanny pretty boy you're your your glorified appendages as are we uh i i have i don't i've it's been some amount of times as i've mentioned i wrote a novel case you don't know about it hell's the world without you uh it's really good and every time religion is in the news uh it'll if you've read it you'll say like oh i understand this now

specifically like weird American religion, but also honestly, even if you didn't grow up religious at all, it's, it's about what if you did. It's not about what if I did. It's about what if you did. Because I already did. And now you did too once you've read it. Hell is the world without you. It's a really good book. Server helped me with the audio book.

He did a great job with that too. And again, basically he wrote it, really. Like basically. Yeah, again. You're welcome, Jason. Some people tell too, you know, they'll do something good and they'll say like, oh, no, that was the Lord speaking through me. Really? No, whenever we do anything, it's just Serber speaking through us.

That's what I do. Praise his name. You can reach me at 38. Godfrey if you have something you need me to speak through you also run that account yeah yep yeah social media music audio books production I've mine telepathy yeah always session oasis talk yeah he does it all I believe that concludes podcast business it's time for looking at the schedule look at before I watch digger last night folks as you were hearing this as you know Delaware won at middle

Tennessee something you definitely knew 32 to 11 and if I use rock wall of a defense could not stop Jack State that score was 9 to 5 an honor of Dolly Parton and tonight

Kennesas State of course we'll defeat Missouri State incredible score for FIU incredible score I can't believe they did that if that really happens by the way. Ask Jason to buy you. If that happens, I'm retiring. Retiring.

Retiring. It's done. There is some like week football here during the week. I don't know if you want to pick any of it up. Week with an A, yeah. ECU UAV is the best we got for here on Thursday night. I mean, him more is going to Texas State. We might fire somebody. Yeah, let's keep it rolling. Friday, Memphis, Tulane. That's pretty fun.

Okay, okay. I'll go bad. So, Lanes record is bad, but, you know, there'll be a solid test for Memphis. Washington Purdue. Washington sucks, but Purdue is awesome. Dude, I got a sell for you on Washington Purdue. This week, Jedfish in a press conference talked about how they didn't have enough money to compete. Washington and Purdue, 8 p.m. Eastern. What'd you join the Big Ten for, man? You're spending all your money on gas.

The fuck. You should have stayed in the fucking Pac-12 where you could drive some places. What on earth? Also, if you're into disappointment, Nebraska's going to Oregon, looking to finally get a win like in a big game and I hope they do there I hope

I hope they do you jumped way ahead you jumped way to Friday that's not Friday Nebraska to Oregon's not Friday it's listed on Friday on LSU football LSU football

what are you doing huh which help now I want a second opinion I'm in the wrong day I'm going to go to Oregon's schedule. I trust them to be accurate about what day they're playing

on. Let's see here. That would indeed appear to be on Saturday. It is Saturday. Okay, good. But one other Friday game we should note, App State of Coast of Carolina, two of our most beloved teams, Coast of Carolina, the best

the best like AEW-level wrestling show in all of college football. Have you seen the get-ups they're wearing for this thing? The 90s get-ups. They're wearing fucking, yeah, 90s Nickelodeon Zubaz, the paper gas station cup. 69 boys logo looking, yeah. Oh, hell yeah.

Yeah, it's just the greatest shit, man. Like, what they do, whatever they do at halftime for this is going to be, I wish both these teams could win somehow. These motherfuckers are saved by the bell. Hey, by playing football, they do both get to win. I love a coastal and app playing each other because it's a battle of two schools that are like 30 minutes away from really, really fun shit. to do. You're a coastal, you're kind of close to the beach.

The beach is there. It's not on the beach, but it's not on the beach. If you're willing to drive 20, 25 minutes, you can get to the beach. There's not skiing at Appalachian, but you're willing to drive like 25, 30 minutes. They got a mudslide. You could get some skiing in. Yeah, you could do the Ricky Ronnie mudslide. Yeah.

They really should be like big, legit rivals. They should. They represent opposite ways of life. Opposite biomes. opposite biomes different hobbies the jm u shit worries me because like there is potential with time for app and coastal to develop into what it should be but like i i i'm concerned that you know some bullshit bullshittery will in for like interject and cause them to not play each other yearly anymore or something they don't even they don't even do the same recreational drugs man like

these are yeah yeah no they don't really do drugs at coastal that's a drink in school for sure yeah yeah or when they do i think they're up the more uh powdered variety. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. It's like white trash, Miami. Right. Right. That's...

It's the aspiration. Damn. You are a seer. Put money on that nine to five result. There's a reason we feel at home there. Saturdays. This is a big, big fucking day, by the way. I was looking ahead.

I also put this in a newsletter. I think this is the second biggest Saturday left. And it starts, like, right away. We got Ohio State, Indiana. Whoa, wake your ass up. Shit. Look alive. Ohio State's favorite there.

That's a big fucking game. Florida plays Texas at the same time. You should watch Ohio State, Indiana. Mississippi State LSU. God, you better not lose that LSU. Oh, boy, yeah. It's going to get late early over there. And I mean, like, you know, yeah, you should win.

But, like, you better not, because there's a whole bunch of more hard shit coming. Northwestern Michigan State. Northwesterns Ooh! Chip Kelly versus Pat Fitzgerald. Northwestern's best coach of this millennium,

David Braun, Aidan Childs going back home, like, ha, make it hurt. This is, this is some serious if Obi-Wan Anakin

went the other way. Oh, uh? Yeah. I'm willing to, I'm willing to entertain this, right? I think Northwestern,

Northwestern does have the high ground because there's students, section doesn't have seats. They literally cannot have the low ground. Yeah. There's also, listen, Auburn,

Georgia, we discussed the motivational possibilities there, where Kirby will probably take the novel approach of. That's a school close to us, and they play the same sport. But they think they're better at it.

Fuck them. He legit does hate them, though. He does hate them. Every day. We should also mention Virginia SMU is on the CW. Those are both erratic teams who could do anything. Can I give you the most BTN game of the year? The most Big Ten network game of the year.

That's right at 12.30 p.m. I wasn't ready. Rutgers and Maryland. This is a good game of the week without a fucking doubt. Yeah. Tickets available for $7 for this one. The production values are high and the offensive totals are low. They will pay you $7 to get rid of their coach.

I think this is the cheapest FBS football game this week. How cheap is it? Seven. Seven dollars. People, you have to pay more to see Charleston, Southern, and Clemson than this game. Damn. Did you know Georgia State is four in one? Listen, Robbie Callan keeps me apprised of everything happening.

They're incredibly good, as you can hear, they did beat my alma mater. They, four and one going to JMU, sneaky large game. Jamie's a big favorite, but yeah. But since when is Billy Napier, disappointed? Yeah, especially against a team from Georgia. My beloved UMS Minutemen have to go to Buffalo, a team that is so good at put yardage on FIU, Bama, Tennessee.

Somebody's got to lose. I love when we get the time of year where it's like, ooh, somebody's going to be really mad. Yeah. Same with Missou, Ole Miss. Do you do UNC Duke Belichick stuff Here we go

The bad feelings Game of the Week Penn State Michigan Oh God There's the somebody's got to lose Game of the Week Either it's four in a row For Penn State

After you fired a guy For losing three in a row Yeah This is the perfect This is the perfect fucking sacrilegious CBS Big Ten game Yeah

You're wasting the theme song On this shit Yeah Do you do t 30 point lead Or Michigan If you lose then everyone looks at you like you're two and four because you are.

I would point everybody to Fallen Empire's Florida State at Miami, and we are going to get a great motivational montage before this that implies that there is something like an equitable outcome to this game. This is like, it's like the hey kids, remember when, you know, it'll be very much like person who watches college football every five years, which is fine. It's fine to tune back in to say like, oh, those teams are playing. I remember that.

I'll watch that. That's fine. And hey, why doesn't FSU have a number by their name? You'll also be treated to 30 different mentions up. Hey, these guys have played together since high school. Since high school. Right, they played together. Yeah, and I'm like, where do they play now?

Where did the really good players go? Also, did they? You know, Derryman's from Duke. You know, like, where is he from? Maybe the same as true as it used to be. That's what I'm saying here. oh boy Derrymanston is from

Duke from Tulane by the way of California That's right We have to mention Washington State, Oregon State Oregon State The best show in the country And these were the two teams That held it the fuck down For the Pact 12

Rebuilding it to something like its former glory That's right Who's loyal These guys Also they didn't have anywhere to go Kentucky at Oklahoma Friends Romans

Romans countrymen lend me your ears Watch this shit there is this is a fucking loaded like the quad box right here notary new nother dame b yu first notary game you'll give a shit about all year and b yu is off to a great start right this is a huge game wisconsin ucla wisconsin is four and one um and like ucela is probably going to run the ball even more than they already were nico's hurt so like ucela as much as i like you know

which is i publicly like attached my name to bob jesney is basically kirt Cignetti. They could lose this game. I'd feel a little silly. Kentucky OU. Yes. Both these teams. Yes. Oklahoma State Houston. Oklahoma State. One lost teams, both are both top 20. Very big. Either of these teams could make the playoff. Oklahoma State or Houston. There's a lot of shit going on. Yeah, Oklahoma State, Houston. Wild-ass game. Do you like fundamental Christian tackling? And I mean that literally and somewhat metaphorically. That's right. Notre Dame at BYU, the tackling in this game is going to be off the fucking charts. Like, yeah.

Like, like, armchair coaches everywhere are just going to be like 7.30. You know where I am? Church. That's right. Church with a clinker and a laser pointer. Yeah, just circling, being like, I like how that guy tackled that guy. That's how you do it. Yeah.

Your spouse is not listening. This will be the one place, this will be the one time where the two opponents will all agree on one thing. everyone in this football stadium will agree that Jesus was white. Did he ever go to Missouri? This is a point of debate. Was he European or American though? Yeah, exactly.

That's a serious point of contention. But the rest of it, like, this is the one, by the way, that you're going to go to. And I guarantee if we had mics that came, like, that you could pick up on your television in your living room that fed into the studio. And we could measure this. be the game that has the highest quotient of that was a clean hit. Like you'll hear that was a clean hit. Whether it is or not.

This, the Notre Dame will be out or, uh, Notre Dame will do the most cussing in this game. That's probably not, um, the strength of theirs usually. Whenever I say that, someone will say like, oh, I know an Irish person who cuss. That's good. I'm glad you did. Um, Utah, Colorado, Wake Forest

a Cal, best team in the world is to go across the country to face the golden bears at fucking 10.30 at night. Um, but honestly, I don't even know if it's a help game. It's Wake Forest. They're actually fine out there. They're not really, like if they only bring 40 points, they're fine. Cal is yelling for help for some reason. Help up eat this guy's ass! Cal has to play football.

Someone needs to stop me. Someone, someone kick me out of this fucking conference. They keep sending people to me. I brought too much cheer wine. I'm too turk. I think the help game of the week might be to Nebraska at Oregon. That's still, that's still fucking late for Nebraska, mind you.

Nebraska phrases a green ring once again.