Sibling Revelry with Kate Hudson and Oliver Hudson - Inside the Lives of Mob Wives...with Renee & Jenn Graziano

Episode Date: August 26, 2024

The Graziano sisters join Oliver to talk about growing up in the middle of mafia mayhem.Find out why their father stopped talking to them after becoming a felon, how a former husband turned on the fam...ily, and what it was like to be treated like mob royalty.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is an IHeart podcast. September is a great time to travel, especially because it's my birthday in September, especially internationally. Because in the past, we've stayed in some pretty awesome Airbnbs in Europe. Did we've one in France, we've one in Greece,
Starting point is 00:00:15 we've actually won in Italy a couple of years ago. Anyway, it just made our trip feel extra special. So if you're heading out this month, consider hosting your home on Airbnb. With the co-host feature, you can hire someone local to help manage everything. Find a co-host at Airbnb.ca slash host.
Starting point is 00:00:32 Hey, it's your favorite jersey girl, Gia Judice. Welcome to Casual Chaos, where I share my story. This week, I'm sitting down with Vanderpump Rural Star, Sheena Shea. I don't really talk to either of them, if I'm being honest. There will be an occasional text, one way or the other, from me to Ariana. Maybe a happy birthday from Ariana to me. I think the last time I talked to Tom, it was like, congrats on America's Got Talent. This is a combo you don't want to miss.
Starting point is 00:01:00 Listen to Casual Chaos on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Your entire identity has been fabricated. Your beloved brother goes missing without a trace. You discover the depths of your mother's illness. I'm Danny Shapiro. And these are just a few of the powerful stories I'll be mining on our upcoming 12th season of family secrets. We continue to be moved and inspired by our guests and their courageously told stories. Listen to Family Secrets
Starting point is 00:01:30 Season 12 on the IHeart Radio app Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts Hi, it's Honey German and I'm back with season two of my podcast Grasias, come again. We got you when it comes to the latest in music and entertainment with interviews with some of your favorite Latin artists and celebrities.
Starting point is 00:01:47 You didn't have to audition? No, I didn't audition. I haven't auditioned in like over 25 years. Oh, wow. That's a real G-talk right there. Oh, yeah. We'll talk about all that's viral and trend. with a little bit of cheesement and a whole lot of laughs.
Starting point is 00:02:01 And of course, the great bevras you've come to expect. Listen to the new season of Dresses Come Again on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, it's Jemma's Begg, host of the Psychology of Your 20s. This September at the Psychology of Your 20s, we're breaking down the very interesting ways psychology applies to real life, like why we crave external validation. I find it so interesting that we are so quick to believe others' judgments of us and not our own judgment of ourselves. So according to this study,
Starting point is 00:02:32 not being liked actually creates similar pain levels as real-life physical pain. Learn more about the psychology of everyday life and, of course, your 20s this September. Listen to the psychology of your 20s on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Kate Hudson.
Starting point is 00:02:53 And my name is Oliver Hudson. We wanted to do something that highlighted our relationship. and what it's like to be siblings. We are a sibling reverie. No, no. Sibling reverie. Don't do that with your mouth. Sibling
Starting point is 00:03:17 Revelry. That's good. I'm in Colorado. I'm at 8,000 feet. trying to get my life in order. I got about a week left of summer. And, you know, summers can get debauchess and, you know, I put the botch and debauchess. I just, I don't know what botch means, but it probably sounds bad.
Starting point is 00:03:45 And now it's time to gear up, to get back home and refresh and restart. I'm doing a movie in October. I can't say what it is yet. so I have a couple of months to work off my baby fat yep 47 but it's I still call it baby fat from a psychological standpoint it helps me yeah this is fat that's been on me
Starting point is 00:04:11 since you know about six months old I'm just a late bloomer you know but anyway I went on a high altitude walk used to be horrors H-H-A-R's high-altitude runs, but now it's walking, because you know what? Walking's in right now, so I'm going to do what's in because I'm hip and I'm trendy. Anyway, enough about me. We have an amazing guest
Starting point is 00:04:36 waiting in our waiting room. Very excited. Very excited to talk to Renee and Jen Graziano. I think it was Jen who started the Mob Wives. I think it was on V.A. one at first and just their life you know what I mean growing up the way that they grew up I know it may not seem like it but Oliver Hudson might have a little can could be connected you know what I mean I'm connected hey my my 23 and me I you know I'm 40% Sicilian and I'm talking like this because you know that's how I normally speak when I talk like this that's I'm putting on an accent. Anyway, Renee's been through a ton, you know, she's been through so much.
Starting point is 00:05:33 Jen's been through so much. I'm just, you can't get deeper than growing up like these girls did. I mean, there's got to be so much shit going on, probably stuff they can't even talk about. Anyway, let's bring them in. Let's get it going. I'm going to try to make them fall in love with me. Hi. Hey, girls, how are you?
Starting point is 00:05:54 Good. How are you? I'm good. Thanks for coming on. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you too. What's going on? Where are you? My sister's. Staten Island. You're Staten Island?
Starting point is 00:06:06 Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know it? Have you ever heard of it? Ah, yeah, once or twice. The dog. We equated with the dog. Well, this is fucking rad because, you know, there's a connection here. First of all, there's so much to get into. You know, just childhood alone.
Starting point is 00:06:25 I can't even imagine. But, you know, so my family on my dad's side is 40. I did my 23, me I'm 40% Sicilian. Ah, awesome. So, yeah, we came from, I think it's called Caltin set, Calta Seta, and then what's this, like, Saracuso in Sicily. My great-grandmother came over, met my great-grandfather Giuseppe on the docks because they were running prohibition back in the day, you know, and his name was Giuseppe.
Starting point is 00:06:55 Salerno. Love it. Potentially, you know, we're still finding out the exact truth. But my relatives seem to say that, you know, Giuseppe's brother was Tony Salerno. Yeah. So, you know, there's, it's a fun connection to talk to you guys who actually have been in that world before we get into anything and the childhood and all that. I just want to talk about the romantic.
Starting point is 00:07:25 of the mafia and how it has been romanticized. And even being somewhat Italian myself, there is this sort of fantasy that I am connected. And there is something extremely cool and romantic about it. But from a firsthand experience, was there romance in it or was it just brutality? Well, I'm going to let her answer the romance question because she experienced it way differently than I did.
Starting point is 00:07:54 Absolutely. First of all, I was always trying to find my romance within that family as well, like try to date all the gangsters. But I definitely was very proud of that world, very, very proud. I mean, I never waited online. I never paid a dinner check. Whatever I walked into, I was treated as if I was royalty. And in my brain, I was royalty. And I think that's because my father was.
Starting point is 00:08:25 such a stand-up guy that there was this it was glamorous I mean it's nothing different than the movies and that's on both hands the the violence but there is something glamorous
Starting point is 00:08:38 about you know being first at everything never waiting never wanting things falling off the trucks I had more fur coats by the age of 10 than some of the people that are in Hollywood that are super you know wealthy and could buy them
Starting point is 00:08:52 mine fell off the truck and they were further Did you know what, did you know what was going on? I mean, did you understand how this was all being provided for you? No. I asked my dad, like, you're always behind the truck when things fall off. That's just amazing. But I remember at the age of 16 years old, I went to this club. It was called Past Shells.
Starting point is 00:09:16 And that's where, like, all the gangsters hung out. And I was at the end of the ball with my best friend who was a wise guy's son. And a guy had said to him, So that's TG's daughter. Yeah, our father's a captain. And I looked at him, I go, my father doesn't sail a ship. My father doesn't drive a boat. And he said, go home and talk to your father.
Starting point is 00:09:35 So while kids learned about the birds and the bees, I learned about captains and soldiers. Yeah. Yeah, it was very, and that's when it hit me. And that's when I kind of took advantage of who I was. Now I knew I can do anything and get away with it. So the answer to your question is romance. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:53 I'm the romantic son. But how did it not happen for you? How was it such a different perspective? Which, by the way, is so interesting. Because we've been doing this show for a million years now with siblings. And you can grow up with the same parents and raise the same exact fucking way. But you have totally different perspectives on those people and how you thought you were raised. That's us.
Starting point is 00:10:14 Yeah. Yeah. I was much younger. Okay. I'll like you get away with that. But really, like where she found. I found romance, I found chaos. And I was always the one that wanted to be left alone.
Starting point is 00:10:28 And I wanted to have, like she wanted, she was very proud of being Anthony's daughter. I wanted to be Jennifer. I wanted to have my own life with my own name and my own prowess or whatever it was. So I like kind of, yes, I used the word prowess. She knows they don't have a dictionary present. So I masked all of my sort of like. pain, if you will, by going to school. And my goal was to get a degree and get away from this lifestyle.
Starting point is 00:10:58 I was kind of embarrassed by it. But, you know, in one hand, I loved it, right? I was like, you love the power that you get from being a gangster's daughter. But I kind of sort of loathe what came along with it. And that was the control and the, you know, you have to act a certain way, look a certain way, be a certain way. And if you didn't do what daddy wanted, he takes all your shit away. Yeah, I don't know where you would. Well, I never got mine taken away
Starting point is 00:11:25 because I always did what I was told. Right. You had to dress a certain way, look a certain way, sort of represent the family, I guess. Exactly, exactly. Not so much dressed a certain way, but there was like,
Starting point is 00:11:35 there was like this, to me it was very controlling. It was an atmosphere of you belonged to them and only them and you couldn't have your own life. Like I dyed my hair once. I remember, and my fellow's like, did you ask me if you can dye my hair? Your hair, that's my hair.
Starting point is 00:11:51 And I was like, are you fucking nuts? Like, that sounds so crazy to me. And the next day, I died it again. So I was that child, where Renee would have been like, okay, Daddy, I'll turn it back to black. Thank you. I wouldn't have died it in the first place. But what happens when you push back?
Starting point is 00:12:08 You know what I mean? Does that sort of cause family, like, issues? And where did your mom fit into all this as far as raising you? Again, two totally different perspectives. She did everything she was told from start to finish all of life. He's now past five years. She's still doing what he would expect of her.
Starting point is 00:12:30 If you ask me, I think we had one of, we definitely have one of the greatest mothers ever. As far as, and he's not, only because he's passed away will I say this, but I do have some sympathy for her
Starting point is 00:12:45 now because he was, it's my way or no way, and that's the end of it. So I do feel bad for her because she's a brilliant, beautiful woman. But golf, I remember one time, remember when, when, I'm having a hot pleasure, remember when dad when she got linoleum, this one time the guy came for the linoleum. You're dating us.
Starting point is 00:13:09 I'm dating. I'm 55 and I can say it because I look better. So the linoleum was like 10 cents more than it was supposed to be on every little square or whatever. And my father got furious and choked the guy. with the telephone court. And my mother just panicked. Like, she didn't know what to do, but that was just normal.
Starting point is 00:13:30 Yeah. Needless to say, we got the linoleum for free. But my mom, my mom came from Hell's Kitchen, my father, the Lower East Side. She was grateful to get out of the Hell's Kitchen.
Starting point is 00:13:44 But she jumped into Hell's Kitchen. Yeah. It's a good one. I know, isn't it? I know. I just thought of that. Yeah. So I do,
Starting point is 00:13:53 There's three of us. And my oldest sister was definitely the worst. She did anything and everything for attention and went against the grain completely. I wanted to be my father. Not my mother, my father. Because he exuded this. He was just, he floated. To me, he floated when he walked, he did.
Starting point is 00:14:17 Don't happen me. My father is like my superhero on earth. It's God and my father. That's what it is for me. You sure it's not in reverse? No, God's first. But I just love this man because he did what he said, he met what he said, and he had this he believed in his own self so much where I fall short on that one.
Starting point is 00:14:42 So I looked up to him because he believed everything and he stood by his word. And I think there's, we don't have that today in this world. This man, if he committed a crime, He did his time. He never told nothing. And he believed in his world so much that it ended up costing him a lot of his time years later. But I respect him for the man that he was. Okay.
Starting point is 00:15:07 Yeah, I want to hear the other side of that because I completely understand what you're saying, right? I mean, someone who is that loyal to their own values and to the people that you love. And, you know, there is something to be said for that. No doubt about it, right? but then when you look at the other side of things where you know and you just look past all of that you know what I'm saying and how are you how are you gaining that respect is it through your true personality and who you are or is it fear you know what I'm saying or is a little bit of both both my father had a personality that was like he was like outrageous you he walked in a room and
Starting point is 00:15:43 everyone wanted to be next to him he was like that charming so I think it was a little bit of both but to me as charming as he was was as vicious as he could be you know so he had that dual nature that I could never fucking reconcile you couldn't I couldn't until I got older until I got older I think it took me
Starting point is 00:16:03 a very long time to understand him but when I finally did I really kind of realized it was family first both of them sometimes that went over us but when you realize that the choice he made you kind of respect the fact that, okay, he picked it and he stood by it to the death. You know, at first I didn't like it, but then I grew to understand it.
Starting point is 00:16:27 And then my mother, going back to that question, she did everything he said, but I think I feel like she lived a little bit through me. Everything that she thinks, like she wants. Yeah, that's right. Everything she wanted to be in her own life, she pushed me to become. And I think a lot of what I tried to accomplish was for her. so that she can see it too or feel it too because I feel like my father stole her life.
Starting point is 00:16:54 Yeah, well, do you think that your mom or do you know if your mom was like being herself behind his back? You know what I'm saying? For me, I think so. That's what I'm saying. Like, meaning like I got to play this part for him, but there are certain things that I want to do that are that individuate me
Starting point is 00:17:07 that make me an authentic person aside from my husband that I'm going to do in the dark a little bit and risk. No, she never did anything in the dark behind his back. Like when I did, I think she was secretly happy. Right, got it. Never. She never disobeyed. And I know that sounds maybe a little harsh,
Starting point is 00:17:25 but I also believe in very old school. I believe in that. She never did anything. Okay, so one time she talked back. She got older. Maybe like two times. One time she was really mad at him and she tried to run away with us. We made it to the corner.
Starting point is 00:17:46 Like she, you know, No, he found us everywhere. Everywhere. We were in Disney World. He was paging us on the Disney World fucking he'd show up at the beach in his fucking full-blown suit with his scarpadels and on the big beach.
Starting point is 00:18:02 How'd you find us? He found us everywhere. And I fucking hated it. I hated it. I loved it. I loved it. First of all, my mother looked like Raquel Welch.
Starting point is 00:18:13 My mother was gorgeous. I mean, gorgeous. phenomenal. So I understand he was, you know, he was jealous, but my mother would never, in a million years,
Starting point is 00:18:26 ever even look at somebody. She one time said that Alec Baldwin was like after I think it was malice or something. Oh, he was the Angela Beal. We were never allowed to watch an Alec Baldwin movie.
Starting point is 00:18:38 No. No, that was so serious. So serious. And Robert De Niro, too. Well, Robert De Niro was her first date ever ever and my father had words with him and he was never
Starting point is 00:18:52 to come around again and he didn't and couldn't watch Robert De Niro unless it was the godfather or anything Bob related he didn't want nothing to do with him either September always feels like the start of something new whether it's back to school new projects or just
Starting point is 00:19:10 a fresh season it's the perfect time to start dreaming about your next adventure I love feeling of possibility, thinking about where to go next, what kind of place will stay in, and how to make it feel like home. I'm already imagining the kind of Airbnb that would make the trip unforgettable, somewhere with charm, character, and a little local flavor. If you're planning to be away this September, why not consider hosting your home on Airbnb while you're gone? Your home could be the highlight of someone else's trip, a cozy place to land, a space that helps them feel
Starting point is 00:19:44 like a local. And with Airbnb's co-host feature, you can hire a local co-host to help with everything from managing bookings to making sure your home is guest ready. Find a co-host at Airbnb.ca slash host. Hi, I'm Jennifer Lopez. And in the new season of the Overcover podcast, I'm taking you on an exciting journey of self-reflection. Am I ready to enter this new part of my life? Like, am I ready to be in a relationship? Am I ready to have kids and to really just devote myself and my time? I I wanted to be successful on my own, not just because of who my mom is. Like, I felt like I needed to be better or work twice as hard as she did. Join me for conversations about healing and growth.
Starting point is 00:20:25 Life is freaking hard. And growth doesn't happen in comfort. It happens in motion, even when you're hurting. All from one of my favorite spaces, The Kitchen. Honestly, these are going to come out so freaking amazing. Be a part of my new chapter and listen to the new season of the Overcomper podcast. as part of the MyCultura Podcast Network on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, it's your favorite Jersey girl, Gia Jude Ice.
Starting point is 00:20:56 Welcome to Casual Chaos, where I share my story. This week, I'm sitting down with Vanderpump Rural Star, Sheena Shea. I don't really talk to either of them, if I'm being honest. There will be an occasional text, one way or the other, from me to Ariana, maybe a happy birthday from Ariana to me. I think the last time I talked to Tom. It was like, congrats on America's Got Talent. This is a combo you don't want to miss. Listen to Casual Chaos on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Starting point is 00:21:27 It may look different, but Native culture is very alive. My name is Nicole Garcia, and on Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we aim to explore that culture. It was a huge honor to become a television writer because it does feel oddly, like, very traditional. It feels like Bob Dylan going electric, that this is something we've been doing for hundreds of years. You carry with you a sense of purpose and confidence. That's Sierra Taylor Ornales, who with Rutherford Falls became the first native showrunner in television history. On the podcast, Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we explore her story, along with other native stories, such as the creation of the first Native Comic-Con or the importance of reservation basketball. Every day, Native people are striving to keep tradition.
Starting point is 00:22:11 alive while navigating the modern world, influencing and bringing our culture into the mainstream. Listen to Burn Sage Burn Bridges on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey guys, it's Stephanie Beatriz and Melissa Fumero, and this is More Better. We are jumping right in and ready to hear from you. Your thoughts, your questions, your feelings about socks with sandals. And we're ready to share some possibly questionable advice and hot takes. That sucks so hard, though. I'm so sorry. Can you out petty them?
Starting point is 00:22:45 Can you match their pettiness for funsies? Yeah. We had so much fun last season, laughing, crying, talking to some new and old friends. Remember when we were in that scene where you guys were just supposed to hug and I was standing? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:59 And I was like, can I also hug them? I'm like, this f*** has no friends. And this time around, we are, say it, Melissa. Should I? Getting a little more better. Oh, finally. It's all the dressing room talk
Starting point is 00:23:17 you've loved in season one. All the things. Because aren't we all trying to get a little more better? Listen to more better on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What did your dad think of those epic movies, the classics? I mean, as far as the Godfather goes. I don't think I ever had a conversation with it.
Starting point is 00:23:41 but I think he, he, I remember watching the Sopranos and him laying on the couch and being, someone's telling them my stories. This is not, you know, stuff like that. But, oh, Goodfellas, well, those are all his friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I think for me, because Goodfellas was also the time I was coming up, growing out.
Starting point is 00:24:01 So I think that was the realist. So to know those men and call them uncle, I mean, I never heard him say anything negative about the movies. I never, I think, that was the one that was depicted the best you know and the closest yeah um but i've never really heard him he didn't he didn't talk about business at all like he didn't never no that's what i'm wondering like how did he keep it from you for 16 years like what the hell did you think was going on well i think you had an idea sooner i know he was i knew i was different
Starting point is 00:24:34 i knew i was different um from the amount of the attention and then i think when i was 13 the feds raided the house for the first time. And that's really when things started to shift for me because the kids in my class glued the article of his arrest in my desk. And I knew it. But when I went home and said anything, he was like,
Starting point is 00:24:57 you always come home and tell me I'll handle it. So for me, I knew it was power. Was that engraved in her? Yeah. Like, if anybody bothered me, I would be like, Daddy. This person is he. And, you know, but I enjoyed my life.
Starting point is 00:25:15 For me, I have a lot of guilt about it now, and it's not even mine to have guilt over. Like, I feel bad about a lot of things, like the people, especially girlfriends of mine, that lost their fathers to murder. It's a horrible feeling, you know, it's horrible. But when it was back then, it was just so, I don't know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:25:39 I mean, it was hard. you know, how organized was it in the sense of, you know, the families who obviously were competing and there was, you know, obviously volatility between them. But it was also there was, there was a structure to it. You know what I mean? So I'm sure there were times of violence and times of pure peace when everyone's sort of getting along and basically, you know, they've got their block essentially and that's it, right? I mean, was it, was it a violent childhood or you just didn't see that shit and was there is there ever any risk you know in the gangster world of the siblings or the children of mobsters sort of being touched not for us no not physically touched there's risk of
Starting point is 00:26:23 being arrested because of the men and it happened to my mother and my sister in the 80s um oh did yeah yeah they got arrested they got arrested it was my mother my father my sister her husband and her mother-in-law oh got arrested and then the two men stepped up and and basically told the government we'll take extra time free the women and they, at that time they let them do it.
Starting point is 00:26:46 Well, you were allowed to back then. So they couldn't get the husbands, they couldn't get my father and my brother-in-law. So pinched the women and then the husbands will take the heat.
Starting point is 00:26:57 So that was the title was mob men take the heat so the women don't have to. That was the title that they ran. But we never saw violence. Not in the house either. All right. maybe through a couple of things.
Starting point is 00:27:11 But we never were hit. Well, we weren't. We were on bad. We got hit once. I got, okay, I got hit on the head with the phone. That was this thing. You'd be walking back and you get you with the receipt. We're like, bang, off the top of the head.
Starting point is 00:27:23 I got kicked in my ass. I got kicked in my ass in high school in front of the whole club. Like, it was never, we never had anything to fear. We were, there was never a gun in the house. My father wasn't, that we knew of, which is good. That means it wasn't. I think she lives. She lives in an alternate universe.
Starting point is 00:27:41 Right, right, right. We have a gun in the house. I don't know if there was or wasn't, but I would assume he would have a gun in the house. Why? Nobody ever wanted to kill him. Because he brought a home from what he was doing before. I don't think so.
Starting point is 00:27:53 I don't think so. You just want to see Daddy is perfect. Yeah. Yes. Yes. I went to the sentence every day. I miss him terribly. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:05 Well, it's your dad. You know what I mean? He was such a, he was such a, he was such a protector and we would stop at nothing to keep his children safe. And looking out in the world today, I wish everybody had my thought. Yeah. You know what I mean? So for me, I kind of, I'm an emotional person. So I equated with everything else that's happening in life and watching kids grow up that their fathers didn't even care about them. For me, that's very hard because my father loved us, oh my God, loved us crazy. He did. He did. It took me a long time to realize.
Starting point is 00:28:39 that. I probably should have not fought against them so hard. I probably... No, but luckily, it makes sense. You know what I mean? Like, you also understood the other side of it as well. You didn't, you know, you didn't want to just sort of shy away from it. You're like, well, there's two sides to this thing. But family is family. And it's the most important thing. Like, I'm a dad. I got three kids. Like, that's all that matters to me. I'm like, are my kids. You know what I mean? Like, that's it. Was your grandfather? His father? No, I don't think so, right?
Starting point is 00:29:10 He was the first. He was the first. And what did he ascend to? Like, what was his top title? She'll tell you. What was his who? Top title. Well, like, what was he?
Starting point is 00:29:21 Oh, my father was the consularia. Alleged. My father was the consularia of the Bonano Crime family. He's dead. All right. And I read the newspaper. It said so. But you're not even allowed to.
Starting point is 00:29:33 Whatever. I'm not allowed to say it. How about this? You know what? For me, the mom. kind of died when my father did. Like my belief of it has shifted tremendously now.
Starting point is 00:29:45 There are men that I still respect and there's men that I absolutely don't respect. There's things I've seen when my father passed away that my stomach turns when I look at certain people now. So now that he's gone,
Starting point is 00:30:01 I know a side of it that I don't like. And I'm okay that it's not a part of my everyday world anymore because I don't have somebody like my father representing my family. Right. I'm good with it. And whether it's allegedly or really was,
Starting point is 00:30:16 according to the government, it said so. Right. So I can't say what the government said. Well, I want to say that the government said anyway. Okay. How far apart are you guys in age? Oh, 20,000. Three and a half years.
Starting point is 00:30:31 Five. Oh, God. No, we're not. I tell everybody five. Oh, whatever. We can't get that out there. No, we can't. But how did you?
Starting point is 00:30:39 How did you guys get along, you know, growing up? Were you guys tight? Growing up, yes. We were, so our sister lost a lot older than us. She was kind of like out there in the streets running amok. Yeah. And we were young. We shared a bedroom together.
Starting point is 00:30:55 And we used to play school and all the things little girls do. But she never, when she got older, she didn't want me around. So I had to go to my cousin Alexis to have her include me. And then I got older and didn't want anything to do with her anymore. Oh, is that what happened? Yeah. Well, I think for me, when I started to date, no, we were actually, we, there was like a brief, she went away to college. So Jennifer took the smart route and she was going to be something. I was going to be somebody's wife and I was going to be a mother and my father's daughter forever. And that's all that mattered to me. And shame on me because I did not expand my horizons the way I should have. I kind of pigeonholed myself and thinking this is all I could be
Starting point is 00:31:43 and this is all I should be. However, later on in life, I became a mob wife on TV. So go figure so she fulfills her dream either way. Well, who did you? Are you married? Oh, no, I'm divorced. I married somebody who I thought was like everything
Starting point is 00:32:00 and he became a federal informant. He's a rapist. No way. He's this scum of the earth. See, Motto. He's a scumbent. I'm sorry. I put my collar in jail.
Starting point is 00:32:13 Yeah. No, he fucking... I hate him. I fucking hate him. I'm sure this is all stuff that is out there. I just don't know about, but wait a minute. Now I'm really hot. He turned, so he, did he, did he turn or did he come in like that?
Starting point is 00:32:25 He turned. Oh, no, he turned. So, um, Mob Wives, uh, season one or two, two. Yeah. Season two, I had plastic surgery gone terribly wrong. Okay. And he came back to me. And he gave me this Rolex.
Starting point is 00:32:39 It was this one Rolex I didn't have. And I'll tell you why that's so important. I take him back. I love you. Mind you, I'm a domestic violence survivor. My took him back anyway. No matter, like, it's like the word abuse. I fall in every category, but I took him back.
Starting point is 00:32:58 I was convinced nobody else would ever want me. I wasn't good enough. I wasn't anything unless he said so. So I went back with them. Long story short. what we find out that he's cooperating and lo and beholds he he takes off my money's gone everything so i go to hawkool the jewelry because i've run his watch collection i take mine off they all had wires in them and they were yeah true story yeah true story so did you find out later how this
Starting point is 00:33:30 happened he got clipped or something and then they turned him um so no he clipped somebody that's how that would hurt. He killed somebody. I comes to find out that he was actually cooperating for a lot more than we knew. It was like he started cooperating in 2006. He turned November 21st, 2011
Starting point is 00:33:51 is when he turned himself in. And true story, my father before he came home, he was coming home from 11 years and I had said maybe three or four months before he came home in a letter, my mom still has. Don't talk to nobody. You're going to go back to jail right before
Starting point is 00:34:07 Thanksgiving. And that Wednesday before Thanksgiving, they picked him back up. He was home three months after 11 years. Yeah. Wow. So there's a what when I said I just spot I haven't Oh yeah. I don't like them anymore. There's a lot of, a lot of sadness behind something I thought was so glamorous. Yeah. Everybody can wreck. Where's that X now? Where's that dude? He actually just went back to jail again. He did the 33 fucking years. He kept. his base up and not being the bird on the wire. I'm laughing because I looked at you. No pun intended to your mother.
Starting point is 00:34:44 No, no, I know. Not a good one. I'm smart. I'm laughing because I looked at your Instagram page and they interviewed like the Jonas brothers and Joey, what's his name and his brothers? And you're like, he clipped someone. I'm like, oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Well, he, I wanted to give him the proper terminology. You said, you know, I understand. This is like heavy fun. I can't help but just be me. I love that. And that's the same thing with me, too. I mean, you know, I've gotten in trouble, not in trouble, but headlines written about me and shit because I say things that are personal. And that's what makes your podcasts great, too, I'm sure, just that authenticity.
Starting point is 00:35:27 That's what made mob wives so successful. By the way, Jen, were you the founder of that? Did you start that show? Uh-huh. Yeah, so I created that. and executive producer She likes to She brags about me more than my mother's
Starting point is 00:35:41 Which is a lot But yeah So I created that and then It ran for six seasons Four spin-offs And the after show That's great She's one of the stars
Starting point is 00:35:53 I know I know Yeah And then But to the detriment of the relationship Of your dad Right because he didn't speak to you For a minute
Starting point is 00:36:01 Yeah So everyone asked me Like how the fuck And why the fuck Did you do that right but again i go back to that rebellious side of me that just wants to do what i want to do and i'm going to do it no matter what and you know i lied to him i never told him the truth of what it was you know he was in prison already and so i just told him oh i made a show it's going to be
Starting point is 00:36:21 out and he was so proud but he had no idea what it was called he had no idea what it was about and by the time he found out it was too late i had already signed it over and started making it and yeah he was fucking furious yeah he didn't talk to us for two years. Wow. Yeah. September always feels like the start of something new, whether it's back to school, new projects, or just a fresh season.
Starting point is 00:36:51 It's the perfect time to start dreaming about your next adventure. I love that feeling of possibility, thinking about where to go next, what kind of place will stay in, and how to make it feel like home. I'm already imagining the kind of Airbnb that. would make the trip unforgettable, somewhere with charm character and a little local flavor. If you're planning to be away this September, why not consider hosting your home on Airbnb while you're gone? Your home could be the highlight of someone else's trip, a cozy place to land, a space that helps them feel like a local. And with Airbnb's co-host feature, you can hire a local co-host to help with everything from managing bookings to making sure your home is guest ready.
Starting point is 00:37:32 Find a co-host at Airbnb.ca slash host. Hi, I'm Janica Lopez, and in the new season of the Overcover podcast, I'm taking you on an exciting journey of self-reflection. Am I ready to enter this new part of my life? Like, am I ready to be in a relationship? Am I ready to have kids and to really just devote myself and my time? I wanted to be successful on my own, not just because of who my mom is. Like, I felt like I needed to be better or work twice as hard as she did.
Starting point is 00:38:01 Join me for conversations about healing and growth. Life is freaking hard. And growth doesn't happen in comfort. It happens in motion, even when you're hurting. All from one of my favorite spaces, The Kitchen. Honestly, these are going to come out so freaking amazing. Be a part of my new chapter and listen to the new season of the Overcomfit podcast as part of the MyCultura podcast network on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast.
Starting point is 00:38:31 Hey, it's your favorite jersey girl, Gia Judice. Welcome to Casual Chaos, where I share my story. This week, I'm sitting down with Vanderpump Rural Star, Sheena Shea. I don't really talk to either of them, if I'm being honest. There will be an occasional text, one way or the other, from me to Ariana, maybe a happy birthday from Ariana to me. I think the last time I talked to Tom, it was like, congrats on America's Got Talent.
Starting point is 00:38:57 This is a combo you don't want to miss. Listen to Casual Chaos on the IHon. Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It may look different, but native culture is very alive. My name is Nicole Garcia, and on Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we aim to explore that culture. It was a huge honor to become a television writer because it does feel oddly, like, very traditional. It feels like Bob Dylan going electric, that this is something we've been doing for a
Starting point is 00:39:24 hundred years. You carry with you a sense of purpose and confidence. That's Sierra Teller Ornelis. who with Rutherford Falls became the first native showrunner in television history. On the podcast, Burn Sage Burn Bridges, we explore her story, along with other Native stories, such as the creation of the first Native Comic-Con or the importance of reservation basketball. Every day, Native people are striving to keep traditions alive while navigating the modern world, influencing and bringing our culture into the mainstream.
Starting point is 00:39:57 Listen to Burn Sage Burn Bridges on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. December 29th, 1975, LaGuardia Airport. The holiday rush, parents hauling luggage, kids gripping their new Christmas toys. Then, at 6.33 p.m., everything changed. There's been a bombing at the TWA terminal. Apparently the explosion actually impelled metal, glass.
Starting point is 00:40:34 The injured were being loaded into ambulances, just a chaotic, chaotic scene. In its wake, a new kind of enemy emerged, and it was here to stay. Terrorism. Law and Order Criminal Justice System is back. In season two, we're turning our focus to a threat that hides in plain sight. That's harder to predict and even harder to stop. Listen to the new season of Law and Order. criminal justice system on the iHeart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your
Starting point is 00:41:06 podcasts you get your podcasts but ren how did that how is that for you because jen look i'm not saying you didn't love your dad but it almost seems like easier where it's just like all right like i have a separation but you have wrapped so much of your identity up and who your father is and His love for you and his protection now, he's like, hey, you know what, Renee? Fuck off. It added to, it fueled my depression and my addiction, most definitely.
Starting point is 00:41:45 I'm just, my father's gone five years. I'm kind of just figuring out who I am. I've always been, my name was Anthony's daughter. And I was good with that. So I'm kind of, I'm learning about myself now. back that it was it was terrible I mean he I wrote this man every week he wouldn't write back to me matter of fact I was in the hospital on my deathbed I was literally on my deathbed the priest had come in and read my last rights the second time and my father called and he said you have say goodbye to your daughter your daughter is not I had mercy throughout my whole body and my father didn't want to get on the phone and he said no your daughter is dying and he said nah she's bullshit you and my mother said no Anthony and my father got on the phone and he said you'll never talk about that show I love you and that's it and that's actually how my father and we never talked about it however I know for a fact you know I it went from
Starting point is 00:42:44 me being Anthony's daughter to him walking down like the corridor and jail being Renee's father I don't know if he was too happy with it but I will tell you this at the very end of his life like I know going to visit him because he died of dementia so he was in a nursing home he would ask me to bring autographs for the nurses so there was
Starting point is 00:43:06 he was proud of of us regardless yeah I think when he was in there he didn't have VH1 right so all he was hearing about was mob wise and his friends were mad and everybody was mad but they never really
Starting point is 00:43:21 got a chance to see that we weren't talking about anything that wasn't already on the news it wasn't about the men it was about the women women's experience. And for me, it was like cathartic. It was like, I want to show what women go through being in this type of lifestyle. So it was all about the women. And finally, when he came home after whatever, maybe it was like season three or four, I don't even remember. And he saw, he was like, this is what everybody was worried about. Now, granted, he didn't like the title and the fact that we were even taught. But he finally was able to see for himself that it wasn't
Starting point is 00:43:51 about him. It wasn't about the men. And it was really just women talk. It was talking about how the lifestyle affected that. And their lives became because of it. So, I mean, eventually, I think he forgave. He was never truly happy. Did he ever see it? I don't know. According to what he told me, no.
Starting point is 00:44:13 But he probably secretly watched an episode or two. Like, there was one episode that I had a fist fight on TV, and he was like, never my daughter. And then I know he was like, you got to learn how to fight. So he probably saw a few things But he didn't like any TV that I did Like even when I did We TV I did a couple of other shows
Starting point is 00:44:35 He didn't like to watch me in general Because he didn't like my behavior And I was, you know, I got nothing to hide I'm gonna say and do as I please And that he was embarrassed by a lot of my bad behavior I don't blame me I'm a little embarrassed by it too When did you guys you had your separation of sorts as sisters,
Starting point is 00:44:59 but when did you come together again? You know what I mean? Like once you went to college, was there a moment where it was a bit separate and then you found your way back to each other? Probably when I had my son, my life kind of came full circle and I needed my mother.
Starting point is 00:45:17 And she was living with my mother. Was daddy in jail? Daddy was in jail? She was living with my mother at the same time And our sons became like brothers. They were like the best of friends. They still are to this day. So I think that's what kind of brought back.
Starting point is 00:45:29 I mean, I always came back. It's not like I ran away. My thing was like, it was like, I just wanted my own life, you know? And she don't agree. But I feel like I was the favorite child from both my mother and my father. And they kind of fixated on it. It's the truth. You became the favorite child.
Starting point is 00:45:48 I was always the favorite child. Jen, Jen, I can relate. I can relate. Always. I'm my mom's favorite. There's hands down. That's it. All right. Well, you know what? Me and Kate will battle you two.
Starting point is 00:45:58 No, because my sister, my sister will admit that. She'll be like, oh yeah, Oliver's the favorite. But I'm the oldest, though. Yeah, well, Lana's the oldest. I felt like they fixated on me, and it was a lot of pressure on both sides to me. I felt like, you know, I had the pressure of being everything my father thought I should be, and I had the pressure of wanting to be everything I wanted to be for my mother. wanted to be for my mother and I just wanted to be me left alone in my own world so I kind of
Starting point is 00:46:27 I didn't run away I was always part of the family and I always came back but I had a whole other life over there that they didn't even know about and that's a whole other story um yeah and it's a good story but why is it but why is that something that why would you say it that way like it's a whole other life which is another story meaning like you created a separate life away from them that you didn't even want them to know about? So the difference is Jennifer is a lot. She's a lot like my father. First of all, they're both Scorpio's.
Starting point is 00:46:58 And they have the, my father was brilliant and my sister's extremely brilliant. And their minds are able to go places to see above and beyond where I wasn't capable of. I'm sure I am. I limited myself. And I was good with it. Wife, mother. you know that that was enough I wanted to go on the visits
Starting point is 00:47:23 I didn't want to be the one that was being visited got it yeah and I didn't want to be my mother being controlled by a man in a lifestyle where you had no voice you were invisible you were nothing but an accessory on the arm not living that way
Starting point is 00:47:41 and that's how I felt growing up and I saw that and I was like we we got to get I asked my mother we got to get the fuck out of and I got nowhere to go I got nowhere to go I got no money of my own. And that to me was like, oh, now I know how I got to get out of here. I got to make my own money. I got to go to school.
Starting point is 00:47:56 I got to become whatever I want to become and go. But I never wanted to leave. It was just me theoretically. Yeah. You just wanted to individuate. You know what I mean? Right. If your mom had the money, if your mom had the means, you think she would have gotten out of there?
Starting point is 00:48:12 You would have never let her know anyway. She wouldn't have left. Oh, I would have taken her. She definitely loved my father. I think that she was there was a lot of it was like weird to me right there was a lot of love right but I couldn't figure out like if there's so much love why is there also this why is there also cheating and she's going to hate me for saying it but that's the lifestyle right right the gumas exactly so why is there this and why do you get to stay out all fucking night well she has to take care of us why can't she go out too like and I couldn't she went bowling yeah bowling and he's just there too was her life she's a really good ball and all and all women's bowling leave
Starting point is 00:48:57 dude that's fucking amazing that needs to be included somewhere in some show that you're doing like an incredible bowl well I can't wait to say if you're looking for a 47 year old 40% Sicilian actor I'm in
Starting point is 00:49:12 and then what about your kids how many kids do you guys have we got one inch both boys and I have four grandchildren. Oh, you do? I have a seven-year-old, a three-and-a-half-year-old, and twin girls that are 18 months. I have one son.
Starting point is 00:49:29 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Today we went to go visit my dad at the cemetery and my grandson put her on a suit. Oh, my God, so cute. You got to show him the picture. He, yeah, wait, I'll get it, I'll get it, I'll get it. He talks to my dad. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:49:45 Can you see that? Can you see? Go closer. oh my god that is unbelievable he's dead serious too yeah he has this conversation i'll come back and visit you yeah seven year old i'm seven years old now i'm going to second it's i try to do that i try to teach him as much as i can he'll go around but he's cute he tells everybody my grandmother was on mob wives yeah and who created oh and my badass aunt jen created it yeah amazing um so So we have one boy each, and they're good boys, and they're nothing like that world.
Starting point is 00:50:24 Yeah. But they understand it. They know it. They know where they came from. Yeah, they were doing jail visits. Five. I saw it was three months old, you know, so it was like crazy. But did they, did they have a romantic notion of it in any way?
Starting point is 00:50:41 You know, are they proud of the fact that their grandfather was a consuliary, allegedly? I'm very proud of my father, very disgraced by his father. My son is very disgraced by his father. But he's still, he goes by Graziano, my son. He doesn't say his father's last name. No. He doesn't. Oh, got it.
Starting point is 00:51:07 Yeah. And if my father had it his way, all the grandkids would go by Grazano. They would have no identity of their own. Right. What about marrying Italian? Was that something that was important? I didn't. And that's real.
Starting point is 00:51:21 Well, he was half Italian. And he was a loser. I should have never married him. My father knew that from the very beginning. He did not want me to marry him. He was Puerto Rican and Italian, but he didn't want me to matter. Listen, true story. I'm a huge believer in God.
Starting point is 00:51:37 The guy's last name is pagan. That's the first. I got married in church. It was called Our Lady of Pity. You would have thought And a black crow I swear to God sat above us on the perch
Starting point is 00:51:50 You would have thought I would have ran out of the church And I let's not forget the Chinese fighting fish That were her centipiece That were eating each other alive In the fucking money I wanted the Siamese fighting fish
Starting point is 00:52:02 But I thought they were bigger But they were little And they just all ate each other I should have known There wasn't one side There was multiple multiple signs You should have just run Let me say this.
Starting point is 00:52:14 My father liked him because he was the muscle. He was the muscle. So he allowed her to marry him. He changed his name to junior. And that was it. So he made him Italian. Oh. And then the fact that he turned on him, that was, I think that, like, really hurt my father
Starting point is 00:52:31 because he was at one point he was going to adopt him and give him our last name. I don't know. I know for a fact he was. I know. And I had a problem with it because it's my life. She'd be married to your fucking brother. No, he wanted to give him his last name so he could be a wise guy.
Starting point is 00:52:49 He could never be a wise guy. His mother was Italian, he could. For someone who knows this, oh, look at you, I don't know nothing. He can never be a wise guy. Why? What are the stipulation? You have to be all Italian. No, you don't.
Starting point is 00:53:00 A hundred percent? Yes, and if there was ever an exception, it was not on the mother's side. It's the father's side. Are you sure? Are you sure? I'm positive. I don't know then.
Starting point is 00:53:11 Maybe I don't know as much as I thought. And I like it that way because I don't have to go to jail. Stay in that world. Stay in the kitchen, Renee. Stay in the kitchen. September always feels like the start of something new, whether it's back to school, new projects, or just a fresh season. It's the perfect time to start dreaming about your next adventure. I love that feeling of possibility, thinking about where to go next, what kind of.
Starting point is 00:53:43 place will stay in and how to make it feel like home. I'm already imagining the kind of Airbnb that would make the trip unforgettable somewhere with charm character and a little local flavor. If you're planning to be away this September, why not consider hosting your home on Airbnb while you're gone? Your home could be the highlight of someone else's trip, a cozy place to land, a space that helps them feel like a local. And with Airbnb's co-host feature, you can hire a local co-host to help with everything from managing bookings to making sure your home is guest ready. Find a co-host at Airbnb.ca slash host. Hi, I'm Janica Lopez and in the new season of the Overcover podcast, I'm taking you on an exciting journey of self-reflection. Am I ready to enter this new
Starting point is 00:54:31 part of my life? Like, am I ready to be in a relationship? Am I ready to have kids and to really just devote myself and my time? I wanted to be successful on my own, not just because of who my mom is. Like, I felt like I needed to be better or work twice as hard as she did. Join me for conversations about healing and growth. Life is freaking hard. And growth doesn't happen in comfort. It happens in motion, even when you're hurting. All from one of my favorite spaces, The Kitchen.
Starting point is 00:54:59 Honestly, these are going to come out so freaking amazing. Be a part of my new chapter and listen to the new season of the Overcomfit podcast as part of the MyCultura podcast network on the IHHHHon. Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, it's your favorite jersey girl, Gia Judice. Welcome to Casual Chaos, where I share my story. This week, I'm sitting down with Vanderpump Rule Star, Sheena Shea. I don't really talk to either of them, if I'm being honest.
Starting point is 00:55:29 There will be an occasional text, one way or the other, from me to Ariana, maybe a happy birthday from Ariana to me. I think the last time I talked to Tom, it was like, congrats on America. has got talent. This is a combo you don't want to miss. Listen to Casual Chaos on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It may look different, but native culture is very alive.
Starting point is 00:55:54 My name is Nicole Garcia, and on Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we aim to explore that culture. It was a huge honor to become a television writer because it does feel oddly, like, very traditional. It feels like Bob Dylan going electric, that this is something we've been doing for a kind of years, you carry with you a sense of purpose and confidence. That's Sierra Taylor Ornelis, who with Rutherford Falls became the first native showrunner in television history. On the podcast, Burn Sage Burn Bridges, we explore her story, along with other native stories, such as the creation of the first Native Comic-Con or the importance of reservation
Starting point is 00:56:31 basketball. Every day, Native people are striving to keep traditions alive while navigating the modern Whirl. Influencing and bringing our culture into the mainstream. Listen to Burn Sage Burn Bridges on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. December 29th, 1975, LaGuardia Airport. The holiday rush, parents hauling luggage, kids gripping their new Christmas toys. Then, at 6.33 p.m. Everything changed. There's been a bombing at the TWA terminal.
Starting point is 00:57:13 Apparently, the explosion actually impelled metal, glass. The injured were being loaded into ambulances. Just a chaotic, chaotic scene. In its wake, a new kind of enemy emerged, and it was here to stay. Terrorism. Law and order, criminal justice system is back. In season two, we're turning our focus to a third. threat that hides in plain sight that's harder to predict and even harder to stop listen to the
Starting point is 00:57:44 new season of law and order criminal justice system on the iHeart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts you get your podcasts rene real quick i want to get into your podcast but before that you know your sort of addiction when did that take place You kind of touched upon it a little bit. You know where it stemmed from. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:12 Where are you at with that now? Like you said you died twice. My addiction was present from the age of like 13, 14. And then throughout like my younger years, my teenage into my 20s, it was champagne and cocaine. That's like where I grew up. And then being a domestic violence survivor, they started to give me like my, he shattered my sacrams. So Oxy 80s came into play when I was about 36. Was this from the same dude, the Puerto Rican County?
Starting point is 00:58:45 Yeah. And how would your dad take to that shit? My father was in jail and I never told because I was taught a lesson when I was about eight years old. My oldest sister used to rob the piggy bank. And my father and I cracked it open one day to count money. And he said, where'd the money go? And I said, Lana took it. And he smacked me.
Starting point is 00:59:05 And he said, never sell on anybody. And that stuck with me all my life, so I never told. So I lived this lie, married to a monster. If your dad would have known the truth, what do you think would have happened? Killed him, absolutely. Do you think he would have killed him? Yeah, absolutely. I didn't tell also because I thought it would be my sin and I'd go to hell.
Starting point is 00:59:26 I really believe that in my mind. I wish I did tell. However, I also had to think about losing my dad to the system, if that was. was the case. It's not here nor there anymore, but I'm now nine months and 10 days sober. Wow. Congratulations. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:59:47 Thank you. I started to get sober like 14 years ago and back and forth and back and forth. And I would say I was definitely sober at least six to eight months a year, just not consecutively. And I battled it and battled it. But now I'm too old. And what happened to me, um, you know, like 11, 10, 11 months ago, um, I'm, I'm better on this side.
Starting point is 01:00:14 I'm not going to, I'm not going to be there for my grandchildren and they need me. And they really love me. And they look to hang out with me. Yeah. So, you know, my best friends are seven and three and a half. So I'm good there. And they don't tell nobody. You had an overdose?
Starting point is 01:00:29 Um, I had several overdoses. You did. Um, the last one, somebody, um, said it was cocaine and it was, um, either fentanyl or heroin and I overdosed and died and then while I was intubated I also went into cardiac arrest
Starting point is 01:00:46 and had heart like so yeah well you're meant to be here you know what I'm saying? Yeah no definitely there's been four of them and two very bad car accidents that I don't even know how I walked out of. Wow twice yeah
Starting point is 01:01:01 she's the only one she's got nine lives that would be like yeah so there's something More for me. Did you experience death in sort of the typical sense in how people say white, light, blah, blah, blah. My plastic surgery I did because I died on the operating table. It was pink and purple. It wasn't white, but it's, I also did like, it has a different for you.
Starting point is 01:01:24 It was like, I'm very different. My life is cold. Death is different. Death is different. She's like, my little pony was there to take me away. except for heaven? No, it was just very cloudy and beautiful and bright. It wasn't white, but it was also just a voice.
Starting point is 01:01:47 It wasn't anything like God didn't say, hey, Renee. Nothing like that. It was just a place of peace. And then I recently did like Ibogaine. Do you know what Ibo Gain is? Plant medicine. Plant medicine. Which kind?
Starting point is 01:02:03 Ibo Gain is from, it's not an ayahuasco. No, it's not ayahuasca. No. It's an intravenous. It's like a 12-hour process. Right. It's not like the ketamine therapies that are going on. There's MDMA therapies that are happening.
Starting point is 01:02:16 I do ketamine therapy. Sillacin. Oh, really? Yeah. My friend did many, you know, appointments of ketamine therapy said it was incredible. It is. You know what? I needed, I was crying every day that my father was dead.
Starting point is 01:02:32 I couldn't get over this death. And it brought me to a place. haven't cried since, like, April. Which is a miracle. It is. It's a complete miracle. I cried, like, on it, on May 25th, the day past, but I haven't cried every day. And for me, I came to a place where I was able to let him go with the notion that I will see you again. I don't got to see you right now because that's where my addiction took me.
Starting point is 01:03:01 I wanted to be more with my dad than I did here. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And if you watch my boy's at all, she cries every episode. Oh, really? I do. I'm a cry baby. I'm very sensitive.
Starting point is 01:03:13 I'm a cancer. Yeah. Well, you're clean, which is fucking great. And do you think this time, you know, what's going to keep you clean? You know what I'm saying? Because you can be clean for eight, nine months. What's going to keep you clean? Every day is one day for me.
Starting point is 01:03:31 I can't. Nothing is promised. It would be really nice. I could tell you the answer, but I can't. Yeah. I have to wake up. Grandkids. My grandkids are a huge part, me spending a lot of time with them, but I have to wake up every day and just actually like who I am.
Starting point is 01:03:47 That's a huge reason why I self-medicate is I really don't always like me. A lot of guilt and shame. You know, if you've ever heard an addict story, they're going to tell you about the guilt and shame. Yeah. So I wake up every day with the hopes that I, that. I'm going to be needed by my grandchildren and my son. And knowing that I make him happy is really important because I know I stole a lot of of his happiness.
Starting point is 01:04:17 You know, he has one parent. It's me. You know what I mean? So let him be proud of at least one of us. I love that. That's great. And is there any addiction in your family other than you? I believe so.
Starting point is 01:04:31 I know my father was a gambler. My father, his lifestyle. in general is addiction. You're addicted to that whole world. Yeah, 100%. But yeah, I'm, yeah, there's a lot of addiction. My father's side of the family, absolutely.
Starting point is 01:04:47 Yeah, yeah. I don't care if they're going to kill me. Well, let's talk about your podcast because now we've got to get out of here soon. Renee, you go first. It's called the Crisis Queen, and I am there. We talk about trauma, and I'm not there to make light of it. your trauma, but to make your trauma feel lighter. I like that.
Starting point is 01:05:10 Based on your experiences in trauma. She's a safe space that they can open up because she's literally been through everything, including death. Yeah. You can't tell her who they're going to tell really at the end. And I ain't going to tell nobody. Exactly. No, I love that.
Starting point is 01:05:28 I love that because I think that's, it's important, you know, and especially doing podcast stuff. if you are open with your experiences, you're allowing people then to open up themselves. You know what I mean? And I've noticed that just through my, not just conversations with this show, but just in life. You know, I'm very open about my anxiety
Starting point is 01:05:49 and that I've had for a million years in my childhood. And, you know, the other thing, too, is people look at me or my sister. And if you talk about trauma or any sort of, you know, issues in your life, um, immediately people are like, what the fuck do you have?
Starting point is 01:06:04 to worry about you grew up you know with celebrity parents and blah but that's just such bullshit you know what I mean like we all have our pain and we all have our traumas and um you know it's important to talk about them not just for yourself but allowing other people to not feel alone not cereally we all know we're not alone but sometimes it can feel lonely in your pain and lonely is a bad place That's a scary place. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, that's when, that's when shit can get really bad. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 01:06:38 Yes. That's when you do something that you probably wouldn't do, but you get into such a done, you're going to the doldrums where you're just like, oh, fuck. What's the point? I've had dealt with anxiety, you know, for, since I was in my 20s. I'm on Lexa Pro, and, you know, it's totally manageable. But it rears its head.
Starting point is 01:06:57 I've learned it. But I went through something maybe three or four years ago where I would, I would never kill myself because I just won't, but I understood why people would. You know what I mean? Yes. I would just be in such despair and sitting there and like, man, I get it. Because if this feeling was never to go away, how do you exist with it? You know what I mean?
Starting point is 01:07:23 So it's, I like what you're doing. I think that's great. Thank you. And I will pray for you. Thanks. You're well. And I'll come on your show if you need me to. Yeah, I love that.
Starting point is 01:07:36 Thank you so much. Awesome. And then, Jen, what are you doing? Yeah, so with this resurgence of everything mob because of the 25th anniversary of Sopranos and all that, Mob Wives has the second run on Paramount Plus and VH1. So when I was creating it, I couldn't, like, I was in it too much. I couldn't talk about it.
Starting point is 01:07:54 So we're doing a podcast, which it's sort of like a mob-wise rewatch. I'm back, watching the episodes in real time, and breaking it down behind the scenes. and telling the truth about what's going on. So we're calling it the Straightened Out podcast, which is a play on a mockout term, but we're straightening out the truth. Right.
Starting point is 01:08:10 Is it just you? No, I have two co-hosts that are kind of, they're like TikTok sensations. They're younger and they're now experiencing mob voice for the first time in their lives. So it's really cool to see how they're getting it from the, because we were off the air like seven, eight years ago when they were younger. So now they're watching it for the first time.
Starting point is 01:08:26 Oh, that's fun. So you're getting fresh eyes on it. Exactly. That's great. well this has been great i appreciate you guys for coming on and being as uh honest and truthful and fun and uh i can't wait to to see what you got going i can't wait to hear your podcast and i can't wait jen to see what you got in the works that sounds fun yeah hopefully i mean it takes forever you know that but no no takes forever it takes forever it takes forever i appreciate you guys
Starting point is 01:08:56 thank you all right bye bye how fascinating jeez even more than anything else they're only three years apart that's basically my sister and I but they are so different so different you know obviously you can see that they're sisters
Starting point is 01:09:18 and they have that rapport but they're just so different it's so funny one was like fuck this I want to be my own person the other one's like nah no this is good um
Starting point is 01:09:32 way, that was fun. Let's get mobbed up. I'm mobbed up. I'm mobbed up. What are you going to do about it? All right. I'm going to leave. Bye.
Starting point is 01:09:48 Hey, it's your favorite jersey girl, Gia Jude Ice. Welcome to Casual Chaos, where I share my story. This week, I'm sitting down with Vanderpump Rule Star, Sheena Shea. I don't really talk to either of them, if I'm being honest. There will be in a case. occasional text, one way or the other, from me to Ariana, maybe a happy birthday from Ariana to me. I think the last time I talked to Tom, it was like, congrats on America's Got Talent. This is a combo you don't want to miss.
Starting point is 01:10:16 Listen to Casual Chaos on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. In early 1988, federal agents raced to track down the gang they suspect of importing millions of dollars worth of heroin into New York from Asia. 30 agents ready to go with shotguns and rifles and you do that. Five, six white people pushed me in the car. Basically, your stay-at-home moms were picking up these large amounts of heroin. All you got to do is receive the package. Don't have to open it, just accept it. She was very upset, crying.
Starting point is 01:10:50 Once I saw the gun, I tried to take his hand, and I saw the flash of light. Listen to the Chinatown Sting on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or anywhere you get your podcasts. Your entire identity has been fabricated. Your beloved brother goes missing without a trace. You discover the depths of your mother's illness. I'm Danny Shapiro, and these are just a few of the powerful stories I'll be mining on our upcoming 12th season of Family Secrets. We continue to be moved and inspired by our guests and their courageously told stories.
Starting point is 01:11:25 Listen to Family Secrets Season 12 on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, it's honey German And I'm back with season two of my podcast Grasias, come again We got you when it comes to the latest in music and entertainment With interviews with some of your favorite Latin artists and celebrities You didn't have to audition? No, I didn't audition.
Starting point is 01:11:46 I haven't auditioned in like over 25 years. Oh, wow. That's a real G-talk right there. Oh, yeah. We'll talk about all that's viral and trending with a little bit of cheesement and a whole lot of laughs And of course, the great bibras you've come to expect. Listen to the new season of
Starting point is 01:12:02 That's just come again on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, it's Gemma Spag, host of the Psychology of Your 20s. This September at the Psychology of Your 20s, we're breaking down the very interesting ways psychology applies to real life, like why we crave external validation. I find it so interesting that we are so quick to believe others' judgments of us and not our own judgment of ourselves. So according to this study, not being liked actually creates similar pain levels as real life physical pain.
Starting point is 01:12:32 Learn more about the psychology of everyday life and, of course, your 20s this September. Listen to the psychology of your 20s on the IHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an IHeart podcast.

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