Simple Swedish Podcast - #289 - Gör inte detta i Sverige (samtal med Cova)

Episode Date: July 21, 2025

Nivå: B1-B2 Idag så har vi Cova med oss i podden. Vi pratar bland annat om att lära sig språk, hur det är att bo i Italien, vilka kulturella skillnader som finns mellan Italien och Sverige och om omvända kulturkrockar. Cova berättar också en intressant strategi hon har för att bara prata italienska med italienarna.  -------------------- Länk till Language Gym - Träna dig till flytande svenska med 100+ konversationslektioner i månaden Klicka här för att bli patron för bara 5€ per månad och få transkript till alla avsnitt  -------------------- Transkript   Fredrik Hallå där och välkommen till Simple Swedish Podcast. Och idag så har vi en gäst med oss här i podden. Det är Cova och det är faktiskt en kollega till mig. Vi jobbar båda i Language Gym och ja, vi hade ett samtal om lite olika saker, bland annat om hur det är att bo i Italien, vilka kulturella skillnader som finns mellan Italien och Sverige som till exempel med öppenhet och med hur man hanterar stora känslor och mattider, service. Och jag kunde såklart också jämföra med Spanien Italien och Spanien är ju två medelhavsländer så det finns vissa likheter och vi pratade också om omvända kulturkrockar. Så någonting lite chockerande hände Cova när hon kom tillbaka till Sverige efter lång tid i Italien. Så vi pratar om någonting som är helt normalt att göra i Italien men som man inte ska göra i Sverige. Och Cova nämner också en intressant strategi för att folk inte ska byta språk när hon pratar italienska med människor. Så när hon lärde sig italienska så använde hon den här strategin för att andra människor skulle stanna i det italienska språket. Fredrik Så det här är någonting som du också kan använda när du pratar svenska. Så vi ska kolla och lyssna på det här samtalet. Väldigt bra för dig som är på en medelnivå i svenska och vill börja förstå konversationer bättre. Så ja, kolla in det här samtalet och kolla också in Cova på instagram, swedishwithcova och ja, då lyssnar vi på samtalet, eller tittar beroende på om du är på youtube eller lyssnar på podden helt enkelt. Välkommen då Cova till Simple Swedish Podcast och kul att ha dig här för. Vi har ändå känt varandra i ett tag. Något år eller mer än ett år. Hur länge har vi känt varandra? Cova Jag tror typ ett och ett halvt. Nej, nästan två år kan vi säga. Jag rundar upp det lite grann. Fredrik Jag tror vi pratade också någon gång på Instagram för att vi båda lägger ut svenskarelaterat material på Instagram. Men kan du berätta lite om dig själv först, lite kort så.  Vad du gör och vad du gillar att göra. Jag vet inte. Cova Ja då. För det första, tack för att jag får vara med. Så jag heter Cova och jag kommer från Göteborg. Men, jag måste typ alltid nämna det här, men min pappa kommer från Chile och min mamma kommer från Sverige. Det är faktiskt ganska många som tror att jag kommer från Italien, Bolivia, Frankrike, Mellanöstern. Jag har sett många kommentarer om det. Men jag är halvsvensk, halvchilensk och jag bor nu i Italien. Jag lär ut svenska på The Language Gym tillsammans med Fred. Och det var så vi lärde känna varandra. Jag pluggar också språk. Jag just nu fokuserar jag mycket på quechua. Och vad mer kan jag säga om mig själv?

Hello there and welcome to Simple Swedish Podcast. Today we have a guest with us here in the podcast. It's Kova and she is actually a colleague of mine. We both work in Language Gym and yeah, we had a conversation about a few different things among other things about how it is to live in Italy what cultural differences there are between Italy and Sweden such as openness and how to handle big emotions

and food times, service and such things and I could of course also compare with Spain Italy and Spain are two Mediterranean countries so there are some similarities. And we also talked about the changing cultural trends. So something... Something a little shocking happened, Kova when Kova came back to Sweden after a long time in Italy.

So we're talking about something that is completely normal to do in Italy, but that you shouldn't do in Sweden. not to do in Sweden. And Kova also mentions an interesting strategy for people not to change languages when she speaks Italian with people. So when she learned Italian, she used this strategy so that other people would stay in the Italian language so this is something that you can also use when you speak Swedish

so we will look and listening to this conversation Very good for you who are on a medium level in Swedish And want to start understanding conversations better So watch this conversation and also check out kova on instagram Swedishwithkova and yeah then we listen to the conversation or watch depending on if you are on youtube

or listen to the podcast simply welcome kova to simple swedish podcast and fun to have you here because we have still known each other for a while. About a year or more than a year. How long have we known each other? I think like one and a half,, because we both post Swedish related material on Instagram. But can you tell us a little about yourself, first, briefly, what you do and what you like to do?

Yes, first of all, thank you for joining me. My name is Kova and I come from Gothenburg. But, I have to mention this, my dad comes from Chile and my mom comes from Sweden. There are actually quite a few who think that I come from Italy, Bolivia, France, the Middle East. I have seen many comments about it, but I am half Swedish, half Chilean and I now live in Italy. I am learning Swedish on The Language Gym, the same as Fred, and that's how we got to know each other. I also study language. Right now I'm focusing a lot on Quechua. And what more can I say about myself? interesting language, Quechua, because it is an original language from South America. I don't think I've met anyone who doesn't many who learn the language, especially outside of the Andes, Bolivia, Chile, Peru, Ecuador. I chose to start with Quechua because my dad is actually originally Chilean, so Indian, you could say. And his family, his grandfather and grandmother,

spoke a language called Mapudungun. But I don't want to learn the middle language, because I think it sounds... I don't know, it's not attractive. And I've always thought Quechua is beautiful. I know people who speak Quechua. I often go to South America. I always go to Chile, Bolivia, Peru. Always...

Ah, those three. Yes, I started in northern Chile, Arica, and then I went up to Bolivia, La Paz, and then to Aritipa, Peru. So I always go around in a circle. Yes, although there they speak another language, but still, I always go on that little, we always have the same little trip, that journey. So that's why I study the language, because I don't know, it sounds beautiful, it's unique and yes, it feels kind of familiar. But was that something you started with recently? I have actually started a little small with it since like several years ago. For example, I have a tendency that I want to understand everything. So I listen to a song and I ask myself what they say, what does it mean, what is this? And sometimes I have heard that when people speak Spanish in certain areas in South America, they tend to use words like Quechua.

So I always ask myself, what does this mean? I've started small since several years ago, but I took it seriously last year. So have you started talking to people a little bit? No, not yet. I've had a lot of things that have come up, so I haven't been able to. But right now I'm just focusing on the grammar. Because that's what I think is... It's not difficult, but it's different. So I thought I'd start with grammar and then words. But it's hard to continue because there aren't that many who speak it.

There isn't much material. Are there teachers on italki and such for Ketchua? There are. What would you say, is there any fun detail with the language you have thought of? No, not really. I would also say that when it comes to the pronunciation, there is a Q or a K that is pronounced in a very explosive way. Like, or you can't do it like that. And many who speak Quechua say that people, Spanish speaking people, have trouble with this. You can hear when a person actually only speaks Spanish and tries to learn Seguercho or vice versa. But just that, that they have a special art title.

Fun, always fun to learn something a little different. But it must be quite difficult because I am learning Moroccan and Arabic now, and that is quite different from standard Arabic. And there are not so many resources, not so much that you can listen to or learn from. And that makes it much more difficult to learn. Even if you learn Spanish or French, there is a flood of resources for different levels. Exactly, that's true. But isn't there a lot of people who speak Arabic? There are a few YouTubers, like three or four. But generally it's quite difficult to find. I like this type of content that you can listen to on a podcast, for example, but people talk slowly and clearly. I always look for that when I learn a language, but that doesn't exist for Moroccan Arabic.

I can imagine that. It probably doesn't exist for Quechua either. No, I don't think there is one. I haven't checked if there is even a podcast, but I can imagine that it's hard. Especially when it's specific dialects and stuff. So you live in Italy and you are often in South America. So how long have you lived in Italy and how come you went there to live? I've actually lived here for a long time., I think 7-8 years or something like that. So it's a very long story, but short-storied, or long story short,

I watched a YouTube video where a man spoke Italian with strangers. This was like 2014 or something like that. Apparently this was a fun prank video because these types of YouTube videos were very viral and popular then, in 2013, 2014, anyway. I noticed that Italian was very similar to Spanish. I noticed that Italian was very similar to Spanish. And then I thought, why not learn Italian? I mean, it's like Spanish, it's not that hard. So I started just because it looked or learned easily and then it turned out that it wasn't as well as I had thought.

But I continued because I learned to know some Italians and we started talking. We were a group of friends, we talked a lot. One day I felt bored, I thought, why not? And this is in Gothenburg, while you lived there? Exactly, this was in Gothenburg. Everything happened in Gothenburg. And one winter in February I thought, why not go to Italy? I mean, I study the language, I know some Italians, so why not?

The funny thing is that I have never... You know that there are people who are almost a little obsessed with Italy. They love Italy, they talk about Italy. I have never been a human. I have never in my life thought oh my god pasta, gelato, never. But I thought why not go? Why not? I went to italy and to do it really quickly now. I told my mom I would just stay there for a week, but a week turned into several years and I still haven't moved back to Sweden. I'm thinking about doing that. Interesting, it started with a YouTube video and then you started to learn the language and then you got to know some Italians. The Italians must have been very nice.

And then you went and visited for a week. But didn't you have school and job or studies? You had a lot, but then you know, so I actually went back and forth. Back and forth from Italy. So I was in Italy in February, then I came back in May and then I came back in June. But then there was something that just said, no, I will not come back to Sweden. I do not want to go back to Sweden. So that was when I said goodbye to Sweden, I do not want to have anything to do with you or the country to do. So it was, as I said, in the beginning that I went back and forth a lot.

And one day I missed my flight or they put in my flight. My flight from Palermo, Italy, to Gothenburg. And then I thought, this is a sign that I'm going to live here. So I'm in Palermo. In Palermo, where is Palermo? In Sicily. So, think about Italy. I think I've actually been there. Is it on the east side?

No, you know, Italy is like a forest, right? Yes, the sea is the ball. Yes, but I meant on the east side of the island. No, Palermo is north. North, ok. Then I haven't been there. What is on the east side? Not much, Messina, kind of. And Etna is also on Sicily.

Exactly, I'm on the south. Are you friends with Etna? No, not directly, but I can hardly see her from here. Have you ever been up on Etna? Yes, and to be honest, I expected something really cool. I expected an explosion and lava, but it was just stones. It was no accident, it might have been good. Yes, it might have been, but still, it wasn't as cool as I expected.

It's still cool to be able to say that I've been on a volcano? Yes, that sounds cool, but it wasn't cool. No, okay. Italy and Sweden have quite different cultures and so on. Was there something special you felt when you came there that made you dare to stay there? Or was it just something specific or was it just a feeling? I think it was just a feeling, but I think something I appreciated and still appreciate is that Italians are so... They are quite open and straight to the point. Swedes are sometimes passive aggressive or careful or, I don't know, shy, backstabbing.

Diplomatic, you could say. Yes, exactly. It just gets tough in length. I mean, if we have a problem, we actually have to mention it. How can we solve the problem if we don't talk about it? people in Italy are good at talking, talking, talking, talking, talking. And I thought that was very nice, very nice. That I can talk about anything with almost anyone.

And yes, it feels very welcoming. Yes, I have also heard that, I think it is maybe like in Spain in a different way, because I live in Spain. And one thing is when it comes to the language, that it's pretty easy to speak Spanish with Spanish speakers, even if you don't Spanish regardless of your level. If you want to speak Spanish with them, that's totally okay. While in Sweden, if you don't have very good Swedish, the Swedes are happy to speak English, even if you want to speak Swedish, which is a bit strange, actually, I think. So it feels like in Spain they like their own language and feel very comfortable with it. I can imagine more like that in Italy. The problem here is that there are actually many people in Sicily who don't speak English. But there are also many who can speak a little Spanish.

So when I speak Italian, you can hear a little Spanish because I use Spanish to speak Italian. In the beginning, there were people who wanted to speak Spanish with me, but I always do. I tell them that I can't speak Spanish. I don't speak English, I don't speak Spanish, I only speak Quechua. So they have no other alternative than to follow Quechua or Italian. So I've never spoken English or Spanish with an Italian, because I have been very straight with that I can only speak Italian or Quechua, but that's a lie. I don't know, I haven't really tried it myself. But I tell people sometimes, that you don't speak English. But you can say that you do this and this works.

You just say, I can't speak English, I can't speak Spanish. Exactly. But I also think that, because I've been to The Language Dream sometimes, we've had students who say that, no, I can't lie or I can't say that because you see that I look British, or you can hear my British accent. And I mean, I don't look Swedish. Everyone knows that. I look very South American and I also sound like that. But in the end, I don't know these people. So why do they need to know the truth about me?

I mean... That's why I always lie. I tell a lie, a white lie lie that I speak Quechua, and then they can talk to me in Quechua or Italian. Or the language I'm studying. Yes, it doesn't have to be a direct lie either. You can say, no, but we either speak Italian or Quechua. Exactly. We speak either Italian or Quechua. English doesn't work. Not a direct lie, actually. That people learn Italian. That's what I think about Sweden, that we in Sweden, I say, well, I don't even live in Sweden, but Swedes often do people a

bear service when you always speak English with everyone. And for those who don't know what a bear service is, is when you think you're to someone's mother or mother. For example, if I am with an Italian, I want to speak Italian. If I am with a person from Denmark, I want to speak Danish, for example, so that I can get to know a person much better. And it gets much more fun that way. Because when you switch languages sometimes, you almost change your personality. Yes, do you speak Danish? No, that was just an example. I don't speak good Danish, but I usually, if I speak with a Danish, I did a with me, even though I used Danish words.

But with younger people they didn't understand at all. Even if I, just because I spoke in Swedish intonation, they didn't understand anything. So then it became English. But it might be that the older people are used to hearing a Swedish speak Danish? Yes, I think so. I think that they are generally more used to other Scandinavian language in general. So English was not something that was everywhere all the time when they grew up. But in our generation, English is very, very close all the time. Exactly. I was thinking of another thing that I think is similar in Italy. In Spain, I have thought that people are very comfortable with emotions, big emotions.

It's my impression anyway, I don't know how much that is true. But it seems that in Spain people are quite comfortable with that. If it's something that feels hard, you're in those feelings and you follow your feelings. Even if they may be hard, but after that it often gives you good feelings and that you may not avoid conflicts or other things. Because you are more comfortable with different feelings. And as in Sweden, people are not that comfortable with strong feelings. I agree with you. It's the same here in Italy. And it was actually something that was a little...

First it was a little difficult to adapt and understand. Because a big difference or a contrast that I have seen is that in Sweden they are, as you say, a little more conflict-ridden. They don't talk so much about what they think or feel, to put it more correctly. They take up a problem and they talk about it as if it were something really big for them. So they sound very angry or very explosive in the tones. Sometimes they sound very angry. But then after five minutes everything is back as usual and they no longer care about the problem. I mean, in Sweden, if I were to tell a person that I don't like this and that and scream, maybe not scream, but if I were to talk about how I feel, how I feel, how angry I am. Maybe on a person, on a Swedish person,

this would almost traumatize a Swedish person. They would have trauma for months. But in Italy, it's like talking about something, taking up a problem, arguing, that is, arguing, arguing. And yes. gräla, bråka, argumentera. Och ja. Och sen tillbaka till vanliga livet. Inga problem, allt i över. Och jag gillar faktiskt det där. Först gillade jag inte det, men sen tänker jag att det är så det ska vara. Har vi ett problem, snackar vi om det, det är okej att gräla.

Att gräla är att br to fight. And then move on. I mean, it's normal, but in Sweden it often happens. It's very human to get... It brings feelings. I am very Swedish in that aspect. I think I'm starting to get a little better at being okay with that it comes out, feelings and things like that. I'm not a very emotional person, but I think I've become more comfortable with it. Was there anything that you had trouble getting used to? when they eat dinner and stuff. In Sweden, I know people, I am one of them, who eat dinner at like 5 or 6 o'clock. And I did exactly the same thing. Then I come here and they say, we're having dinner at 11 o'clock, 12 o'clock.

That's not dinner, that's like dinner, not dinner. Dinner is like eight in Sweden if you eat that. It's the same as here, more or less. I don't know how it is with the size of the meals because in Spain you eat a pretty big meal before the guest, like at 2-3 o'clock, sometimes 4. And dinner is pretty late, but a Norrlänning, a Skåning, a Gothenburg, a Stockholmer, they have, or they eat more or less the same thing, they have the same household food, they have the same food, the same food, the same food, the same food. They have different statements and such. But we are quite united as a country. But in Italy, I mean, I go from Palermo two hours and it's a whole new culture. So I can't talk about the same...

Yes, I can't exactly, not in a huge contrast, but for example, once I drove two hours from Palermo, I went into a café and all the bakers they had were new. Bakers in Palermo and bakers in a city that is two hours away is not the same. Imagine yourself that in Gothenburg we eat cinnamon buns and in Stockholm we eat baklava, for example. A huge contrast in Italy, so that was very shocking to me. So when it comes to food, I can't say so much about the portions, but because people say that Sicilians eat a lot of food and they do. But in the whole of Italy, I don't know, or in other parts of Italy that I don't know how it is. No, but I did a little road trip from Sicily to Rome, where we also went through, I don't remember what the places were called. But it was really like that. You saw, okay, here, are they good at this? And there was a place where there was a lot of chili, I don't remember which area it was.

I think it was Calabria. Yes, it feels familiar. We were at a restaurant and I got a small jar of chili with me because that was the specialty they had there. And somewhere in Sicily there are a lot of pistachio nuts, right? Exactly. The first thing I ate in Sicily was a pistachio pizza and I had never even heard of it before, but it was fantastic. But that's true. We have a lot of nuts that are almonds and pistachios. I mean, I've seen video clips from Italians complaining about how

Swedes, for example, make carbonara. Swedes maybe use cream. But I've seen people do the same thing in Palermo. Same thing here. So, just as you say, different areas, different cities have their own speciality. But in Sweden it doesn't feel the same. I know we have it in Sweden, but it's not such a big contrast, I would say. They also have homogeneous in Sweden, purely in general. But one thing that we talked about before was this with reverse culture hooks. It's pretty common to have a culture

hook when you get to somewhere where it's a bit different. You're like, oh, here they eat dinner at 11 o'clock. Oh, strange. But we both have lived abroad for quite a long time. And when you come back to your homeland, you can also get a cultural gap. Do you have any experience of that? then you can also get some cultural I was standing in the corner, but I think I wanted to walk past, or I wanted to do something. So I kind of slapped someone on the shoulder, or touched someone's shoulder to say excuse me. And I did that to the person in front of me.

There was a person in front of me, I slapped his shoulder said, excuse me, and he jumped. I thought, but then I realized that it is not normal to touch strangers. No, it's not. I felt so stupid, but I understood why he jumped and got scared. Yes, right. So it happened to me. And you? Has it happened to you? Uhm... No, I'm sure it has, but I just realized that being physical is also in Spain. It's just that Spain and Italy are two Mediterranean countries, there is quite a similar culture. And in Spain people are very physical, that you take on each other a lot. And I think that's a pretty good thing, I think, because it creates a little more trust, you become a little more comfortable with a person.

But yes, it is because it is in the culture. I'm thinking maybe if someone would take me in Sweden, maybe it would not be as comfortable. I do not know. That's true, because everything is about space. I mean, I have no problem talking to a stranger, a person I do not know, I do not know, anywhere. But, if that happens in Sweden, if a stranger starts talking to me, it will just get weird. But if it happens in Spain, Peru, Brazil, okay, no problem. But that's exactly what you're saying. If it happens in Sweden, it's like a warning bell that starts to ring. Right, so it's not the action in itself, but it's had any kind of cultural shock. It's the first one that comes to mind spontaneously.

If you're going to have a dinner or a party or something like that, you can buy beer or wine, a bottle of wine or something, on the way to most countries. And that's not something you can do in Sweden, because the system company is closed for the most part. And another thing is that things are going very effectively in Sweden. This is not a culture shock, but it's just things that I spontaneously think about, that things are very effective in Sweden. I'm curious, because this happened to me, and I've talked to others about the same topic. And they agree. So now I'm curious how it is for you. So when I go to Sweden, because sometimes I have to go there, I was there two weeks ago and I'm going to go there again soon.

I don't want to go to Sweden, I think it's boring. But I have to. One thing I hate is when I land in Sweden and I think, damn, I have to start speaking Swedish every day. I don't know why, but despite this being my mother's goal, I hate speaking Swedish. It's just a stale language and just so boring. But what do you think? Are you tired of speaking Swedish or how does it feel for you? I get tired of it if I have to work too much with it, which is a bit strange since I get tired of speaking Swedish. I think that as long as I also have many other languages in my life, then that's just what I need to have other languages for, for it to feel fun. But I think it was a bit more like that before,

after I had lived abroad for a long time, the first time. But I notice that if I live in Sweden, or I haven't really lived in Sweden in the last ten years, but if I stay for a month or more, then I start to feel that it's something that is understood. And I feel that I want more language it afterwards. It's just the first day that's tough. I think, maybe another cultural body, but you know, customer service in Sweden sometimes feels so fake. because when you order food or coffee at Espresso House, they tend to speak almost with a baby's voice. And it's so hard and disturbing for me to talk like that. And it's like a shock, like, hello, I'm an adult, you can talk normally with me.

But then, you know, you become a child, it's just how Swedes talk. But it's actually a huge difference, I think, with this service. Because in the Mediterranean, I'm just saying now, because I Sweden it is a professional level, that you have a kind of barrier of professionalism between, and it is not the purpose that you should be friends with the one you serve coffee to or what you do. Exactly. I agree with you there. And another thing, I have asked myself why it is like this, but I also think that, now you are just saying something I think, but for example, when Italians go to restaurants, cafes or whatever it is, they are there for the food. So they often don't think so much about the service itself. But a Swedish person might think that, I don't know, how they talked to me, or the service.

They think about small details, maybe. I know that it's a lot in other countries. But I think it's much nicer when you can talk to someone like a friend. I agree, but I think that here in Italy, it's very... Just as you say, there is no mask directly, but they are themselves. You explained it in a good way. You get the impression that they don't have a facade. Exactly. But they do in Sweden. So if you have a nice conversation with one of them, it always feels fake.

They don't know that for me. Yes, a little bit like that. Not always, but yeah. It's always good service, but it's often with a bit of a facade and barriers. I think it's quite, it's good to round off. Here, there's something else you want to say before we go to the end? You can also tell us where you can find yourself and where you want to follow you. Because I know you are on Instagram and so on. Exactly. So I'm on Instagram and my Instagram account is Swedish, so Swedish.

So Swedish with Koba. And Koba is spelled as Coca Cola, so with a C. Think Koba, Cola, Coca Cola. It's easy to remember. So Swedish with K blog on Instagram and there I post Reels and pictures and content about Sweden, Swedish and the Swedish language culture. Okay, I have linked to that as well. And you are also a teacher at Language Gym. Exactly, so you can also find me at the Language Gym. So you're very welcome at the Language Gym as well. Anything else you want to say before we...

No, I've said nothing. Yes, but it was a lot of fun. A lot of fun conversation. We talked about a lot of different things. So thanks for being with us. And thanks for letting for being with us. And thank you for letting me be with you. Okay, see you.

Yes, see you, we'll meet again.