Single Ladies In Your Area - Holiday Romances

Episode Date: June 27, 2025

It’s summer. It’s hot. It’s horny. This week Amy and Harriet discuss recent holiday romances, and ask questions like: Why is it easier to pull abroad? Can you channel holiday romance energy at home? And is just moving to Australia the best option?We want to hear your dating stories! Email in at [e-mail] Single Ladies In Your Area on Instagram @singleladiespodRecorded and edited by Aniya Das for Plosive.Artwork by Welcome Studio. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, me again, Amy Gledhill, but this time I'm with... Not Harriet Kemsley. Whoa! WT, fuck! What's going on? I'm with bloody Ian Smith. Offer to Northern News podcast. Yes, a podcast that's not about the news. Don't worry, single ladies. No, it's not about the news. It's not about being single.

It's about the North. And all of our stories are about couples. That is not the truth Ian. No, not technically true. It's weird stuff, it's funny stuff that's going on up North that we're reporting back on. Things like pure evil blackbird named Derek terrorising Yorkshire Village and attacking children. Woman in tears after spotting spitting image of dead dog in Bathmat. And we've got special guests. We're talking about people like

Phil Wang, Jessica Nappett, Ed Campbell and Ross Noble who joined us in the studio. Woohoo! Yeah! That's Northern News out every Thursday at wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, I'm Amy Gleddhill. And I'm Harriet Kemsley. We're both single and in our thirties. And we've found ourselves back on the dating scene. And the landscape has changed. Everyone has settled down.

But we're back out there. We're desperately trying to figure out what the hell we should be doing. So we're going to speak to experts, chat about dates we've been on. If we manage to get any. And share your tips and horror stories. So we all feel less alone. We might even get our exes on. Yeah, we'll see about that. This is Single Ladies in Your Area. Hello. Oh my gosh, it's so nice to see you. It's so nice to see you. For the listeners, Harriet is tanned AF.

You look like a goddess. Yeah, yeah, it's going to prematurely age me in the future, but we're just thinking about the now, you know. You tan so well. I really, I really feel like a different person when I have a tan. Like in the winter, I just feel like I have to live in a hole. And then in the summer, I'm like, OK, this is my chance to get out there. And then I'm like, oh, this is my chance to get out there. And then I'm like, oh no, got to hibernate again.

Well, we're a tag team because I, I feel like I have to live in a hole in summer because I burn. Yes, we make one person. One complete person. Yeah, that's lovely. That is nice. Yeah. We found our other half.

That's nice. So why are you so tanned? I've been, I've been away. I went to Sydney. Wow. In Australia. Can I just say that in May I also went to Australia and my tan is, well, I'm somehow paler than when I went-

You have a glow though. Well. You have a bit of a glow about you. Well yeah, I have a bit of a glow about me, sure. Why you got a little, why you got a little glow? Why is she glowing? Well, maybe the same reason you're glowing, of a glow. Yeah, I have a bit of a glow. Sure. Why you got a little glow? Well, maybe the same reason you're glowing, because you're glowing. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you. Have we done it?

Yeah. This series is different, everybody. Yeah. We're I messaged Steven last night and I was like, I'm back. And I have taken off my graveyard picture from my... That's great. I was going to message Steve and be like, listen, buddy, thanks for the advice. It's working. That's good. Oh my God. Oh, you go first.

We haven't properly told each other everything that's been happening. Yeah. Because we keep wanting to talk and then we go, save it for the pod. Did you? Save it for the pod. Every time I tell anyone, they get so excited. It's so sweet. But they're like, I've just been listening to us for the last year.

Just be like, no offense. So offensive. Oh, God. Oh, God. OK, so we've both been to Australia and we've spread our wings. Yes, we've flown. We've flown. Oh baby, did we fly? So in Australia, what's interesting is, you know, we did that manifesting episode. I manifested my perfect man genuinely and I met him in real life and was like,

Oh, this is so weird. Because it was like I'd created a man and was like, ah, this is bonkers. You're magic. I'm magic, but do you know what I left off the list? Oh, lives in England. Well, yeah, that and also available. Oh, okay. Yeah.

So I met him and I was literally shaking his hand to be like, oh, I've done it. I fucking done it. I can't believe it. You're everything on the list. And then, yeah, like fully married and stuff. But that's fine. It was just great to know he exists.

Yeah. But there's options out there that there's people you can connect with because I think for a long time, I think we were just like a bit delicate, like little baby singles that were kind of- Little baby birds. In the little nest just coming out and just like

everything felt so scary and like impossible. Yeah. Yeah. Now there's hope. Well, now there's horniness, which I think is an ingredient that we were missing. That was a weird noise. I'm sorry. Yes.

Sorry. That just sounds so, sorry. It was quite guttural. I'm so sorry. Yes. Horny ladies in your area. We're coming after you. But I think we were too scared to be horny.

Yes. Yes. I think that's one of the things I keep thinking is like I came out of marriage with a child and I was like this old prude lady and I was like, I'm a married lady. I can't be behaving in this way. I'm a mother. This is madness. I'm like this. And then I was like, oh no, I've just remembered who I was and got the fun back. And I didn't think I was, I could be that again. I thought I had to be this other person. And then I just remembered, oh yeah, I used to be fun.

You've always been fun. You've never not been fun. Not sexually for the last couple of years. I've been very serious, which it turns out is off-putting. Hello, sir. I will shake your hand. I'm a mother. I'm an adult lady and a mother.

And the most I can do so is shake your hand. Good day to you. I said good day, sir. That's been my vibe. That's literally been my vibe the last two years. And mine has been like peeping behind a curtain and whispering to you. I love him. I'm in love with him. We were like Victorian. Yeah, we were like Jane Austen. Like, We were like Jane Austen, like gossiping in the town square about boys and then just like giggling. Behind our fans.

Behind our fans and just like dreaming of the Lord of the Manor or something, I don't know. And then it's like, oh yeah, we live in the 21st century. I'm sorry, I just panicked about what century it was. I started saying it and I was like, that's right, yeah. We live in the 25th or. I'm sorry, I just panicked about what century it was. I was like, yeah, 25th or whatever century is now. And how do you kiss someone? Amy, you just got a lunch. The Australian boy.

Can I tell you the tale? Please, please. This is it's all it's all I want. Okay. It's all I want. Okay. So from the very beginning, do not miss out a single detail. Okay. Thank you. I land in Australia. I want. Okay. Okay. So. Start from the very beginning. Do not miss out a single detail. Okay. Thank you. I land in Australia. I fall in love, I would say five times while I'm there. I'm there for three weeks. I fall completely and utterly in love five times. Your nervous system goes through such a journey like every three days.

Oh yeah. I'm a wreck on a nerve level. My nerves are frazzled. So land, fall in love with a boy, that's fine. He's got a girlfriend, don't worry about that. Day four, meet the man of my dreams, he's married, don't worry about that. But do fall in love with, so I'm in love twice, week one. Then I ask a boy out for a drink because we were, I thought we were flirting, but I don't think we were because he looked at the message and still hasn't responded. His phone probably fell in the sea. I think his phone fell in the sea. I saw him like quite a few times afterwards and we like chatted. But that's good. You put yourself out there and then you open yourself up to other things.

He's just not the guy. He's just an idiot. The problem is with that is I guess how do you respond to that? You can't say, no, I don't want to drink. Because everyone likes to have a drink. Everyone has to drink like daily for like survival. You can't say I don't want to drink. But then it's like if they're in a relationship or if there's something not quite right then they can't. No, if he was single. This one was definitely single because we had been talking about dating.

Yeah. I'll be honest, it was 3am and I sent this message from McDonald's. I said, hey, do you want to have a drink next week? That's it. But then we had conversations afterwards. That's good though, he just wasn't the one. You just put yourself out there. That's really good.

And that's a bit on him. But then how do you say no? Because you can't be like, oh, you know, like, I just don't think it's like a thing. Because then you're like, I was just asking you for a drink, you freak. It's like it is a tricky thing, I guess. But it's like, good for you. That's the way to be. Exactly. His loss. His loss. And I wouldn't have done it in England.

It was because I was free in Australia. I was like, I've only got like two weeks here. So I was like, look, I need to fall in love another three or four times. So do you want to fall in love? Maybe I thought I said, do you want to go for a drink? But maybe I actually messaged him, I'm in love with you. Would you like to go for a drink? McDonald's nice.

McDonald's, would you like to go for a McDonald's milkshake with me right now? So that's, I was like, okay, no worries. And then I was like, fuck it, I'm going to go. So these were all like people, like friends of friends, comedians, whatever. I was like, I'm going to go on a hinge. And I get away from the get away from the stupid comedians. And I wanted to find the most Australian man possible.

That was my crocodile dandy. I literally put in crocodile dandy once. Once crocodile Dundee likes crocodile Dundee. Photo of graveyard. Photo of graveyard. Photo of alligator. Photo of flips on a barbie. I found this guy. Mullet. Oh, I love a mullet. The mullet has had the biggest revamp.

The biggest revamp. Fuck. What happened? I don't know what happened, but for some reason it is doing something to me on a cellular level. A mullet and a mustache. I can't breathe. I've got so into mustaches. It can change the whole face. What is it?

It just gives them, it just gives you something to look at maybe. I don't know. That's what it is. A bit of interest in the face. Like there's not much happening often. Yes. And you're like, also, I think I have sort of like 80% facial blindness.

So if someone's got a mustache, I'm like, that's him. Cause it's probably him. Cause I can see a mustache. I can't see all your features and all that. I don't know what's going on, but I can see a big dark bit. Drawn towards it. So I went on hinge and I can talk about him because

now this is very interesting. I couldn't be asked to explain comedian, whatever. I mean, your country is a duke. I didn't want any of that. Yeah. It's hard to explain when you're in Australia and there's some guy living his life and he's like, what? Yeah. I was like, I can't, I can't believe any of that. So when we were chatting, he drives freight trains, which I thought was the hottest thing I'd ever heard. He's in charge of huge machinery, going across the land at night, bringing coal to cities.

Do you know what I mean? I'm like- Again, very Victorian, yes. What? Yes. He operates a spinning Jenny. I can't remember what that is, but I remember learning about that at school. I'm going to show you a picture of him.

So I said to him, oh, he's so fit. Oh, he's unbearable how fit he is. Right. It's a bit of a rude picture, but you can't see anything. Oh, is this unhinged? How terrible, how fit he is. Right, it's a bit of a rude picture, but you can't see anything. Oh! Is this on Hinge? No, this is on Hinge, but this was, sorry, the picture is quite field. These pictures are WhatsApp.

These are specific for me. Oh, that's nice. I thought you were saying that was what was in his Hinge profile. Oh no, no. And I was like, wow, that is, Oh no, no, just nice little pictures on wow, that is, oh no. Oh, that's lovely. No, just nice little pictures on hinge, him smiling, holding Australian flags.

But this is for you, if people at home don't understand, he's naked, but from. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I think it's important that we explain that. We just skipped over that detail. You didn't explain it, he said it to you. So I was like, he's just putting that on hint. And you're like, hello. Yes, please. Hello, yes, please. The Simpsons and Nudity, I'm in. No, no, he's a lovely boy. And he's like, what do you do? And I was like, ah. So I said, I've got like a business admin job. And I said, it's so boring, I don't wanna talk about it.

Because he's a guy, he was like, okay, cool. Never asked again. Never asked again. And I loved it. So we was chatting for just- You can just be a person. You can just be a person. So we was chatting for a little bit

and then we agreed to go on a date. Now, because I was doing shows at the Melbourne Comedy Festival, I could only meet him at, I think it was like half 11 at night. And Matt sends a message. Ah, the zoo's shut. What can we get up to at 11.30pm? What can we get up to at 11.30pm? And I was like, I'm not here for long. And I can only meet you at half 11 at night. And he was just like, what job do you do?

And I was like, it's because of the time differences. When I'm doing spreadsheets, they have to be doing it in London. Yeah, you know? Yeah, that's great. That's great. So blessing. He's like, OK, so I'm in this bar with some comedians, actually. And then I'm like, OK, I got to go sit somewhere else because I'm going to go on a date with a freight train driver. I've never been more nervous in my life, in my entire fucking life. Is this your first actual proper date?

First ever app date ever. It's so nerve wracking. You feel sick. I felt so sick. And I was sat in the corner. You feel sick before it. I felt so sick. And I was sat in the corner. My heart was just racing. And I was like looking at the door.

And I realized I was kind of like doing a little performance for myself of like, like I was confused about how to sit and how to breathe. And should I be on my phone? Should I not be on my phone? Does it look too weird if I'm just sat on my phone? Should I be like- Staring at the door.

Staring at the door or like perusing the menu or... I don't know. Do you know what I mean? I know exactly what you mean. It's only so long you can look at a menu. Yes! Yes! I was like, what do I do with my hands? What do I do with my face? Should I have a full drink?

Should I wait to get... Like I just... I was questioning everything. I'd gone to the toilet to check my makeup like 250,000 times. I was so nerve wracking. And then he came, I saw him come in and then he went to the bar. And then I was like, so fucking nervous.

And then I got up and just like, sort of tapped him on the shoulder. And I was like, I was like, hey, just so you know, I'm sorry. Oh no. Hello. Hello. It was literally like me approaching like a, like a rescue cat being like, Hey, it's

okay. Don't be frightened. I'm here. Don't be frightened. I'm just letting you know I'm in the corner, but don't be scared. I don't know. The fact you sat there for so long as well, like repairing how he was going to see you and then you're like, hello. Tap, tap, tap. It's me.

Oh, I'm just there. And he was just like, okay. And was a bit like, I don't know, not cold, but like tired. It's 1130. He's been driving a train since like 4am. But I don't know really what I was expecting. I didn't feel immediately comforted. I was like, oh shit, this might be really hard.

And because of the, you know, the time I tried to go on an app date and the guy was drunk, I'd made sure that we'd like, not call but like send like video messages and stuff. And I was just like, okay, this is good. He doesn't seem like a psychopath. But I thought, I don't know what I thought.

And then I went and sat down again and I was like, oh God, oh God, oh God. And then he comes over and it is, it's all, like I'm not gonna lie, it's fucking awkward. And it's like, hey, have you been on your train today? He's like, but like, and he's like very sincere about it. He loves his train so much. And he's just like, yeah, yeah, I did this, this and this.

We went from here to here. And he's being like, yeah, yeah, I did this, this and this. We went from here to here. And he's being just a little bit, I guess, in hindsight, now I know he was nervous too. It's so hard to remember they can get nervous. It's so hard to remember this. I was just like, oh, he's seen me in real life and he hates me. And then I was just like, oh, well, I want to die.

This is awful. And I was just like, oh God. But it wasn't that. It was just that he was also nervous and I was just like, Oh God. But it wasn't that it was just that he was also nervous and I was nervous. So honestly, the first 10 minutes, I was really just like, you know, me comparing the table, being like, Hey, who's drinking? If it was a podcast, what podcast would we be? Come on.

So I was just like firing questions at him. Did you do the podcast one? No, I don't think it got as far as that. They were all train based. What's your favorite train? How fast can a train go? How do you stop a train? Can you get on the roof of a train? I don't know. But I wasn't listening to any of the answers. Yeah, it was just about keeping it going. Yeah, I wasn't even letting him fully answer. I was just asking question after question. But then we had a drink. And then we breathed out a out a bit. And then we start having a laugh. And then a vibe starts appearing and I'm like, okay, this is good. This is really good.

And then I started feeling a bit like, a bit like, yeah, I started enjoying it, which was great. The only thing I wasn't enjoying was the lie that I'd said that I work in business. And that lie got harder and harder because, and this never happens, three different women came up in this bar to me and went, we're so sorry to interrupt, we just really loved your show. And I was like, oh, thank you so much.

And then he'd be like, what was that? I was like, I don't know. He said, tell me again. So the train goes at what speed? There's a big poster of your face like sat behind you. Harriet, on the way back to the hotel, we walked past, I would say, a six foot poster of my face. He didn't notice. This is the great thing about lying to men. This is the great thing. This is great. It's actually so easy. Everyone should do it more. Why are we lying more?

It's there for the taking. Why are we being honest all the time? Oh my God. And on the way back, it's all we bumped into some comedians, like well-known comedians that I think he recognized as well. Is that your business colleagues are strange. He was just like, what? He said, what?

What is it that you do? Because he said, what show are they talking about? And I said, because I panicked, I said, oh, I did a talk at the town hall. And I think it's that they must have come to that. And I'm like, what the fuck? And he's like, oh yeah, cool. Okay. And I'm like, what the fuck?

What the fuck? It was cray cray. Also, I've only been on Australian TV once and it was at the time of this date. So I was like, if you turn on the TV, I'm going to be on there. So I had to just, cause it was meant the time of this date. So I was like, if you turn on the TV, I'm going to be on there. So I had to just, because it was meant to be like a viewing party as well for this like TV. And I just didn't, I was just like, why are you on the TV? And you're like, it's funny story. I was walking

through the theatre and I accidentally walked across the stage and all these people were looking. So I picked up the microphone and I just spoke. It just felt like the thing to do. And all these people were looking, so I picked up the microphone and I just spoke. It just felt like the thing to do. And he's like, okay. I was on my way to do a spreadsheet and a microphone fell in my hand. It was so bizarre. So he was like, he had such a thick Australian accent, which I loved. And he's all like tattooed and like so Australian.

And I, that my reservation about him was like, he might be a little bit blokey or a little bit, I don't know. He was actually, without knowing it, the most thoughtful feminist I've ever met. His behavior was impeccable constantly. And we'd be walking and be like, I'll walk you back to your hotel, but she was like, just so you know,

there's no pressure on anything. Obviously there's no pressure ever. I don't need to tell you this, but just just like, just so you know, there's no pressure on anything. Obviously there's no pressure ever. I don't need to tell you this, but I'm just reaffirming it. And I was like, that's great, thank you. And he was just like, that's really nice. He was like, oh, it's so easy to not be a dick. I'm so sorry that everyone's a dick at the moment. And it was just like, but he was so manly with it.

It was so hot. Cause I think sometimes you get kind of like, you get boys who make it their personality to be like yeah I just read female authors and stuff like that and you're like oh yeah we know a lot of them. We know so many where you're like you're actually you're manipulative with your feminism sir whereas this guy was just so like simple that sounds like a negative, but he was just a straightforward, simple man. He was so wholesome and just like good hearted and sweet.

Love strains, supports women in business. It's perfect. It's literally the perfect guy. He was incredible. And also we had someone on the podcast where I remember saying to you, like, oh, no one's ever asked me what I want. Constantly like, what do you need? What do you like? What is this okay? I don't know, I was just like, oh my God.

He even asked me in messages before, like, what do you mix? Like a good kiss. And I was like, oh, I don't know. And then I put something, oh my God, he followed them instructions to a T. It was, Harriet, it was incredible. It was incredible. I didn't think men were capable of this before. I didn't. Like, and I was, you know, when I kept being like, Oh, you know, but like, what if they're

just like, they're not thinking about you or anything. And I mean, maybe I haven't been giving them enough credit. Cut that Anya. It's not our fault. it's still their fault somehow. But no, he was fantastic. Yeah, we had a great night and then he left and we're still in touch. He still doesn't know my surname or that I'm a comedian. But we're still in touch and he's gone traveling.

He's been traveling in America and he sends me pictures of his travels and all the different trains he's seen. I love this. Is he going to travel to the UK at any point? No, he's busy doing his trains, but I'm going to go back to Melbourne next year. And we've already said like, we'll try and see each other. Just so far away. Just so far away. That's so perfect. And I, but I fucked up because I could have seen him a second time and I didn't to hang out with this guy that I'd manifested who's married.

Just cause I was like, wow, I just want to spend every second with you that I can. And then I really regret it after. Cause I was like, oh, but Darcy was so sweet. I should have, yeah. Lesson from the universe. Lesson from the universe. Yeah.

Lesson from the universe. Lesson from the universe. Lesson from the universe. Oh, is message back? It's not good. Okay, Harriet. Welcome to Harriet Gets Late. Joining me today is Harriet. Harriet. Hello, Amy. It's nice to be here. It's been a long time coming. Harriet. Harriet. Hello Amy. It's nice to be here. It's been a long time coming. Literally. I can't believe we both did it in Australia. Oh God. So I went to Australia. It was like incredibly stressful in the buildup. There was a lot of things happening and it was the worst and best times of my life. It's just all been like such an intense time. And I got to Australia and the first week was incredibly stressful.

It was really nice because like a really old friend of mine was there and I got to see him quite a lot and that was so lovely. And then I was like, I need to like date or something. And like, I am, it was really weird like doing standup there because I was like going into clubs and stuff with comics I didn't know. So it was weird like starting again in a way

and like they were already nice but like they all know each other, you know. So it felt like a new kid at school a bit and it was confusing. And so I was like, right, I'm going to use the apps. That's what I'm going to do. And I kept like matching with people on Bumble that were like so fit. And I was like, this is amazing. Then I go on and they'd unmatch. I was like, oh, okay, this is, this is helpful.

And then I was like, okay, I'm just gonna message them and say like, oh, I'm in Sydney for a couple of weeks. What do you think I should do? Like as an opener that they could be like, oh. One of them replied and said, I don't know, like the opera house, you could maybe go to like Honda. I was like, I'm not asking, I could Google that.

Like I'm just trying to hint, you know what I mean? And then another guy said, my bedroom. And I was like, we've got to play the game here. We got to pretend the middle ground between Sydney Opera House and my dick. There's gotta be a middle ground there. There's gotta be a middle ground. And then I went on the app, you're not supposed to name. And, um, I matched with one of the most attractive men I've ever seen in my life.

Can we just do a shout out to Australian men? Oh, thank you Australia. If I knew the national anthem, I would sing it right now. We're all hot men and hot women. Everyone's hot. Everyone's hot. I think it's that. Kangaroo.

Kangaroo. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's that. Kangaroo. Kangaroo. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. God, God love you Australia. Thank you for your service. All the hot criminals that got sent away must have just taken all the hot jeans away from our ugly country, no offense. No offense, but you go over there,

I can't believe what's happening over there. The streets are lined with the most charismatic, stunning, charming people. And then you come back and you're like, yeah, it's hard. It's hard to be back. It's a real reality. Yeah. Shock. Yeah.

I got like a few messages from like guys like being like, oh, I'll show you around or whatever. But again, it's like on Instagram, it's like, if you can't see their profile or they're like, oh, do you want to come out with me? And it's like, you've given me no information. I don't know who you are, what's happening. It's like, this is a really confusing mismatch. And then I met with this guy. And from the first message, it was just like, he knew me.

It was so weird. And then it turned out he did because he'd watched last one laughing But basically I found the only attractive fan of British comedy But then I was like, oh is that weird that you watched it and then I was like, this is what men Did you watch it in Australia? Yeah. That's so cool! I didn't think people would watch it.

That's amazing! Yeah, it was like quite big over there. It was just like so confused. It was all just very confusing. But then he was just like so fun and sweet. And like, there was just a few things where I was like, it was just this weird thing where I just felt like I knew him and I trusted him. And then I didn't mean the first day because I just had loads of work to do and I was still like, I don't quite know. And then the next day I was like, fuck it. And he lives like near the beach and he was like, come and I'll show you around. And so I was just like, I was with a friend Sophie Duca who was there. It's like, I'm just going to do it. I'm just going to go.

And then like, if you don't hear from me, this is roughly the area. So you know, just let someone know. And then I went and we just had a coffee on the beach and it was just like, I don't know, we just like went deep. What was it like the first few seconds when you met? Because this is where I felt so awkward. It was just great. I just felt like I knew him and trusted him. It was so weird. I think he is very charismatic.

And then we went back to his to have dinner. And then I was like messaging Sophie like where I am, like sending her my live location, like secretly. I was like, what am I doing? Like, I can't get murdered. I've got things to do. Again, it's so hard not to get murdered. And then we had dinner and then I had my show and then he picked me up after my show. And it was like that. I just moved in with him for like five days. It was crazy. He's so attractive, but he was also like so funny and like goofy and he found me really

funny and it was just like so great. And we just like did things like just like watch TV together. I just haven't done that in so long. And we just like cuddled up and watched TV and it was just great. And like there's like a few like things around it that's up and watched TV and it was just great. And like there's like a few like things around it that's like not ideal, but it was great. Is it the fact that he lives like a 26 hour flight away? Yeah. But I think it was like, it was just like so good for me that I just like remembered

like, and I wouldn't have been able to do that here. Like there was, there's no chance that I could have, I would have been able to see him like once or twice. There's no chance I could have just been like, let's just go for this and just do it. And yeah, but he lives in Australia and I live here and it also was not real life. I totally get that. But it was, but yeah, it was, it was great. And I think it just helped me like trust men again. It was just, it was just great.

Fucking hell. So when are we moving to Australia? Yes, we need to move to Australia. The thing is we can never move to Australia. It just, it. Fucking hell. So when are we moving to Australia? Yes, we need to move to Australia. The thing is we can never move to Australia. It just can't. It just can't happen. But Australia was very good for me. And yeah, it was just really nice.

It was just so weird. I just had the boyfriend experience for nearly a week. It was really weird. And he just was like, and I think also he was just so confident that I was so worried about men not being put off by stand up, but like, because he's so confident in himself, he'd just be like, like loved it. And so you're like, Oh yeah, like you just need to find one that's not insecure. I fucked up a little bit on an interview last week where they again asked me the question

about whether men are attracted to women that are stand ups. And I was like, it's only the one if found out what I found out is it's only the insecure ones that aren't attracted to female comedians. And I know that's going to be the headline. I fucked up as I'm trying to raise this. Harriet, I'm going to join you on this crusade. Yeah. Just to be like, we're not disgusting guys. Come on, please. But yeah yeah it was like super fun and it's like giving me my mojo back fucking hell is this flirting for those listening for the single ladies listening, I recommend getting out of the fucking country.

Where whichever, even if you're in Australia, you need to get out of Australia. You need to just go somewhere safely somehow. Yeah. Where you, cause you do things because there's a time limit. That's it. I honestly think that makes such a difference. Yeah, cause like otherwise it would have been like,

oh, is this something? And then it was like, oh, we live in different parts of the world, so this is just what, this is here. Yeah, I think that's great. I think the time thing makes such a difference because it makes you act as in like, we've got to meet up, otherwise it's never gonna happen. And then it makes you just go,

well, there's gonna be an ending. So I think it's brilliant. Also, I feel so much more confident being like the new girl there. Yeah. Because you feel a bit like, like you do feel a bit like you're in a film when you're in a different country. Yeah. And you hold the cards a bit because you're going to leave. There's like, unless do not do this, do not stay. Surprise. I'm staying. And they're like, fuck, that was not the deal. Yeah. I think leaving the UK is important because I mean, if you just go from like Kent to Essex,

like it's not going to have the same effect. You know what I mean? It's not about leaving your specific area. I think we just got to all get out of the UK. There's something in the water and it's, yeah, it's bad. Yeah. I think, yeah, I think a holiday romance is. Yeah, this summer everybody. This summer.

That's what we're promoting. Every time I leave the country, I do really well. Yeah, you're killing it. And killing it outside of England. Yeah. Interesting. What does that mean? You are afraid of commitments.

That's it. That's it. That's it. Yeah. Yeah, That's right. Okay. Great. And when are you next going away? I have no plans to. Do you neither? Although we're talking about going to LA. Yes. Yes. Okay. I have been to LA for a few times and never pulled.

I think LA is a bit tricky, but we could go like Nevada or something, you know. So to Las Vegas. Yes. Go stand near whoever's winning the most around. Yeah. So what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas apart from on the podcast. What happens in Vegas goes on the podcast immediately actually. But we should go somewhere.

Yeah. Yeah. We've got to. Otherwise, I mean, we're going to. Yeah. Big shout out to, I just did Cat Laughs, Kilkenny in Ireland. And, can I just say, big shout out to Irish guys. Fall in love again, five, six times, but I was only there for like two days. There's something about an Irish mum.

Yeah, yeah. The twinkle in their eyes. Yeah. Oh, big farming boys. I went out with Alison Spittel specifically. She was like, what's that guy you're interested in? I was like, like a thick-fingered farming boy. Yes. With a glint in his eyes. Yes, with a little cheeky.

With a little, yeah. And we, oh, actually, this is a great time for me to do a shout out. I met someone in a loud club and we were sat opposite each other and we mimed, this sounds so much worse than it was, it was hot. We mimed to each other for an hour.

Poor Alison was just sort of sat. What, like you're trapped in a box or something? As in like, all right, this sounds awful. Like making cups of tea. We was just doing like little, I don't know what was going on, but we couldn't speak and we was like, we was like miming stuff to each other. He was so hot. He was so hot and he was so Irish.

I couldn't even understand him. Alison had to translate. He was fit, right? And then and then I was like, I'm going to go. And then his friends was like, change numbers, change numbers. And but he was a bit, I think he was a bit drunk. And I was like, I didn't know what to do. And it just felt a bit awkward.

So I was like, no, I'm leaving. And then Alison wrote my number on a bus ticket, ran back into the club, put it on the desk. And I was like, fucking brilliant. Waited all night for a text, no text. We're walking home via a kebab shop called Abra Kebabra. I see him in there. I'm like, Alison, come in with me. Come in. So Alison, Alison Spittel is the greatest wing woman. She came in, she pretends to be looking at the kebab menu. Neither of us want in a kebab. And

then I'm like, oh, hey, it's you. We have a cuddle. It's really nice talking to his friends. God, this sounds like being 20 again. It felt like being 20. Have we regressed? Yeah, but I think in a good way. Yeah, I think so too. I think we've become prudish Victorian ladies. Yeah, now we're swinging too far the other way.

Now we're swinging right back to 15-year-old slags. And then we're going to sort of settle out at our own age in about a year. Great, great. I'm in this kebab shop and we're like, and I'm out at our own age in about a year. Great, great. I'm in this kebab shop and we're like, and I'm like, Hey, are you around tomorrow? He's so Irish, I can't understand and he's drunk. And I'm trying to go like, if you're around, I'm here for one more night, message me, we'll hang out tomorrow.

And he, and he doesn't. And I think he probably lost the number and all of this business. But I was like desperate to find him. So I tried to be like an internet sleuth and I found in the nightclub he was in, he's in a video looking lost. He looks, he's walking like passing on the floor. He looks so pissed and lost. And then I just put like a message underneath this video being like, I really fancied the guy who looks lost in the white t-shirt. Does anyone know who he is?

I've had no responses, but maybe the podcast can help. Okay, a lost man. There's a lost man. There's a lost boy in Ireland. I think his name is Brendan or Brennan. He's from something beginning with M in the North of Ireland. Can mime a cup of tea? Monohan, monoghan.

Amy, are we genuinely doing this? Yeah. If you or anyone you know knows a guy called Brennan, he does something which sounds illegal about petrol and fuel. Getting some petrol or fuel from somewhere to somewhere else so it's cheaper. He drives a white transit van. His friend was on a stag do in Kilkenny.

How do you know he drives a white transit van? He told me in his mime. He was mimin'. And then Alison was going, he drives a transit van. He was on a stag do in Kilkenny. There was about six of you. That's all I got. I've got a picture of him because I screenshot it from the thing. Anyway, he's fit and he was so good at mime that Alison was going, bless her, he's like clearly just like a farm boy, but Alison was going, did you train at Goliath? And she's going, where did you get your mime skills from? And he's just like, I'm self-taught. And she's like, where did you train?

What? Where did you train in mime? He was the best mime I've ever seen. Like blue. Anyway. Okay. The things we can be attracted to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Please help in the search. If anybody has any clues or information, we've got a helpline. 24 seven. This reward. Okay. Okay. Put some posters up in Abraka, Barbara. We're going to find it. We're not going to rest till we find him. Is it ham? So we've done really well with holiday romances. I can't believe it. Imagine

us last year, like, hearing these stories. And so I think it's a thing like to anyone out there, like it just can feel, it all feels so daunting and scary. You just got to regress to your teenage years. Yeah. You've just got to embrace that teenage energy. Yeah. Get a bottle of lamb rusk. Down it outside a petrol station. Yeah. Find a kebab shop. Yeah. With ideally an Irish or Australian man. Get a bottle of Lambrusker, down it outside a petrol station, find a kebab shop with ideally an Irish or Australian man.

Yes. Or American. Or a man from anywhere. Apart from the UK. Apart from, no, specifically, England. And I would say if you're thinking, great, well, I want a holiday romance, but I don't have the time nor the funds. It's not the actual holiday that gets the blood flowing. It's

the mindset. So all you need to do is put yourself in that holiday mindset. Like set yourself, go like, oh, I'm going to go on a date before the 10th. I'm going to go on a little mind holiday and I'm going to go on a date before the 10th and I'm going to put that time limit on me. And maybe that's, maybe that's the thing that's going to go on a little mind holiday and I'm going to go on a date before the 10th and I'm going to put that time limit on me and maybe that's the thing that's going to help. I think that would help me. I think that's the thing. It's like taking the pressure off because it's like so often it's like, okay, well, you know, we're at this stage in our life. We're in our 30s. We've got to find the one and we will not have any fun until we find him. And actually, it's really like people keep saying to me

like, wow, you look so different. And for you as well, like I think it's just like, oh, like, sorry, sorry, I was gonna say a load has been lifted. I think load is the right terminology to be using in this moment when we get our heads out of the gutter ladies. But, yeah, just to try and have a bit of fun. And I think what's so hard as well is that we've been burned before. Yeah. And so it's hard to forget that. But yeah, let's just all have some fun for God's sake. Let's just have some fun. And on that note, we're going to be having a little bit of fun and a little bit of a summer holiday for ourselves. We're going to go away together. So we're going to take a little pause. The tiniest little pause. But you can still get stuff on Patreon

on our Patreon. That will still be thriving. Just a little summer holiday and then we're back. Yeah. And then we're back. Oh, my gosh. I wonder what we'll get up to. I know. I'm just I always just I'm like, Oh, God, I hope I can just keep having fun. You know, it's just nothing is linear. I know. I know. It's peaks and troughs. Yes. Yeah. It's ups and downs.

It's bumps and grinds. It's hugging a pregnancy pillow alone one night in bed, watching my TV bed, watching house MD, a show from 2002 with Hugh Laurie. Some nights it's that some nights it's banging an Australian for a train driver. And you wouldn't have it any other way. I wouldn't have it any other way. I wouldn't. So, cheers to the boys. Yeah, well done boys. And everyone in between.

And we'll be back in a few short weeks.