Single Ladies In Your Area - Listener Letter "The loneliness that comes with solo travelling”

Episode Date: January 16, 2026

Single Ladies are on a break and we’ll be back very soon. To tide you over until then, this week you can enjoy yet another full Patreon episode - for free!This week we hear from a listener who is solo travelling, and Amy and Harriet discuss the pros and cons.We want to hear your dating stories! Email in at [e-mail] Single Ladies In Your Area on Instagram @singleladiespodRecorded and edited by Aniya Das for Plosive.Photos by Matt Crockett and Linda Blacker.Design by Welcome Studio. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, Amy Gledhill here. And Harriet Kemsley. From the Single Ladies in Your Area podcast. And we've got some exciting news. We've sorted your Valentine's Day plans again, as we're doing a special live recording of the podcast on Valentine's Day. A.K.A. Saturday the 14th of February. Yes, we've got a lovely venue.

It's at the Underbelly Boulevard in Soho, London. And we're on late at 9.15pm. So if you have a terrible date booked in, you can go to that, and then join us after for a debrief. Oh, I mean, I'm excited. We had so much fun at the last Valentine's Day show. Yes, and we both absolutely overshared. Will we do it again?

You'll have to come along and find out. Okay, yes, yes, we will. So that's Saturday, 14th of February at Underbelly Boulevard, and you can get tickets at plosive.com. I'm Amy Gledhill. And I'm Harriet Kemm's. We're both single and in our 30s. And we've found ourselves back on the dating scene

and the landscape has changed. Everyone has settled down. But we're back out there. We're desperately trying to figure out what the hell we should be doing. So we're going to speak to experts. Chat about dates we've been on. If we managed to get any. And share your tips and horror stories.

So we all feel less alone. We might even get our exes on. Yeah, we'll see about that. This is Single Ladies in your area. I'm pretty jolly. I'm bringing a jolly New Year's energy. Look at me go. You've got a spring in your step.

Real spring in my step. I'm a new lady. Are you? New year, new me. Nah. Nah. Nah. Nah.

Say more shit. Nah. Same all shit. Same all problems. Nah. All gone. All the hope is gone. But we will be doing our new series talking all about what's going on very shortly.

That is coming up. But in the meantime, we are giving you some bonus content on the main feed. Yeah. To get through January, we're sharing some more. some more content. Yes. We've got to get through January. We just have to, Harriet.

There's no way around it. We're somehow. But yeah, I'm excited for the new series. We've got a lot to share. But these are our little private patrons that are our little Patreonis. Patreonis. We love you, Patriones.

You love you Patriones. And if you like this stuff that we're going to share and you're not a Patreon and you're missing us, there's loads of stuff. There's an embarrassing amount of stuff on our Patreon. on now if you want to have a look. It's not an embarrassment of riches. It's an embarrassment of... Of embarrassments? Yeah. It's an embarrassment of embarrassments. We hope you are having a nice January, of course, and we can't wait to see you again soon. And also, doing Christmas gigs and stuff,

the amount of people, I say people, exclusively women, that have come up and said how much they they love the podcast and it means so much. So shout out to everyone who's seen us live recently at any time. It seems to be exclusively so far, like really great people that listen. Really great people. It's not you. It's not you. If you listen to this, it's not you. It's not.

We hope you enjoy this episode and you're having a nice January. And we look forward to seeing you soon. See you soon. Thanks for listening, everybody. It's a much. Hello. Hello. Thank you for coming.

Thank you. Come in. Come in. I feel like we're sort of sat in a jacuzing. Come in, there's room, there's room. Oh, I wasn't thinking jacuzzi, but that's me. Oh, that's popped me right up. Come in, sickle ladies, get in the jacuzzi.

We were in a jacuzzi once. Do you remember when we got told off of being too loud in the beautiful tranquil spa and we were like, wha! Just squealing in the spa. Squealing, capital and ruining it for everyone else. Can you be quiet ladies? Yes. We're sickle ladies in your area.

You know that we don't care. Get out of the jacuzzi. Get out of the jacuzzi. You haven't paid. Okay. Why are you naked? I don't know where is that a problem. Is that true?

No, no. No. We've got another letter from a listener. It's letters from a listener. Do do do do. And the subject is simply, thank you. You didn't need to say that. That's lovely.

Hi, Harriet and Amy. I wanted to send a quick thank you. I was a single lady very much not in your area last week on a holiday to Thailand. That is better. That is a better place to be. Yeah. I visited friends for a few days and then went it solo for the rest of the trip. Oh, yes, please.

I'd love that. On Monday, I was travelling from Bangkok to... Come on then, Amy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can you just say this. Quiet, please just quick. Canterbury. From Bangkok to Canterbury.

Don't worry about that. Making my way. Do another place in Thailand. She was travelling around Thailand, starting at Bangkok. Who cares where she was ending up? Making my way with my mega backpack. I know the backpacks. Oh, I know the backpacks.

I hope I had one of them straps. You know, that goes from shoulder to shoulder. Oh, yeah. And round your waist. It really just take the pressure off. We are sponsored by a mega backpack You know when I started stand up There was a period It was only like two, maybe three gigs

Where I wore a backpack on stage On stage It made so much sense in my head Because I was like I would sway a bit Because I'd be like a bit panicked And I'd just sway because I'd get dizzy as well And so I put on this bag

And it would like root me to the ground Also there's like Back then there was like no place to put your things There was no backstage And so you could bring your stuff on stage with you. If it weren't bad, I had in my head, I could just walk straight out. You can just get out, yeah.

But then now and again, I've had people say to me, you were the backpacker? Like, it weren't spread about the backpack. Because in my head, I was like, this makes sense, actually. Yeah. I'd try a backpack on stage and it makes me, like, really steady. But I think everyone would be like,

there must be something coming with that. When she was she going to reference it? Yeah. When she's going to reference the backpack? And instead I'd be like, cool, see you later, guys. And then just walk off. Does she know? She's doing a backpack.

But it's like kind of a hurdle when people are like, oh, like mentioning your jokes, they're just like, sick backpack. Mega backpack, nerd. What a lot of baggage you've come on stage right. Metaphorical and miserable baggage. It roots me down. It keeps me grounded. She says, I felt quite vulnerable. Not in an unsafe way, but just with the responsibility and loneliness that can come with solo traveling.

For show. Have you done much solo travelling? Yeah. I actually, well, I'd be too scared to now. But when I was brave and normal, I loved it. Where did you go? So I did, I've done the East Coast of America for a month. Are you serious?

Are you serious? On your own? Yeah. Amy, I didn't know this and that is so cool. Yeah, I lived in Italy for a bit. I got a job there. What? Who am I sitting with?

I know. I went to Jamaica. I lived in Jamaica with some wood carvers. What? Yeah. You used to travel. All the time. Because I never went on holiday until I was 18.

And then as soon as I went on a plane and stuff, I was like, you can just do this. Oh my God. And then I was like, well, I just want to do this. Traveled, I've gone to Paris a lot on my own. I love travelling on my own. And what did you do in Paris? Stayed in my Mart.

And you just went to Montmartre and went around. Yeah, nearly got a job in a pub, but I was doing my air levels. Not my air levels, my uni. And my dad had to send me a message being like, do come back and finish the course. And I was like, I'm going to be a bar made in Paris. And he's like, no, just you can be. But I was like a week away from finishing my uni degree.

And I was like, I'm thrown it all the way. I've got a bar job and an Irish pub in Paris. Did you meet people like when you were travelling? So I knew our girl who lived there. So I met up with her for a little bit. And like in America, I knew a girl who I went to uni with. But I didn't know very well, but she had like a condo. So I stayed with her for a little bit.

but mainly was just like bobbing about on my own, went to San Francisco, did some gigs and didn't have anywhere to stay. And some of the comedians on the upper mic thing were like, come and say with us in this house in San Francisco and all of them had like, there was so many people living in this house and they all had like, this is my surfer,

like this is the bedroom, this is my chair, this is where I sleep. And they were like, oh, big Tony Kay is an interday so you can sleep on his chair. And I was like, brilliant. Like I loved it. But there is like a kind of, it's almost like a melancholy when you're like doing something that's brilliant, but you're on your own because you kind of like have this year need to be like to turn someone and be like, oh, like I went to see the Golden Gate Bridge like on my own. And it was like, it was so cool. And then you turn to be like, oh my God. But there's no one there. So you just kind of have to go, huh, this is cool. I think that's like very smooth like solo parenting. It's like, you're like, oh, like, oh, but there should be somebody that I like, we. together go, oh, she did this thing, isn't that amazing?

Yeah. But you don't have anyone like right there. Yeah. But it's still amazing and incredible. Yes. I love that because I find it so intriguing. I think I've been away like way more since my divorce. I think part of it is like I just wanted to physically get away. Yes.

Because in order to process my divorce, I have to see my ex-partner. I would say daily. Yeah. So if I leave then I get a bit of space to kind of process a little bit. Like I get really anxious before I go and then I really love it. But I kind of tend to go with friends, but I love the idea of solo travelling. Yeah. I was talking to Rosie Jones, she really loves to go away. And I think it's on her own.

I think it's very, I really love the idea of it. But I've never done it really. Oh, well, yeah. I think it's a really, weirdly, really calm. Because there's no like adhering to anyone else's schedule or being like, are you tired, you need to eat now? You're literally just doing exactly what you want. And I think you end up being a lot braver because you're on your own.

So you go, I'm going to talk to that group of people. Every time I've gone, particularly in America, I was staying in hostels. So I think it made it really... It's a no for me. No, but it made it really easy to meet people. Yeah, yeah, definitely. And I'm still friends with, like, some of the people that we met. And, like, yeah, I think it's, I mean, I wouldn't, that's the thing.

I wouldn't stay in hostels now. But there's so many women traveling on their own. And when there's another woman on their own, you kind of look at each other and you're like, hey, are you, what, are you on your own? Yeah, I'm me too. Hey, do you want to go for a drink? Yeah, I saw this really cool place back there. And it's like, I saw this really cool place back there. And it's like,

Bam, you're in. Wow. You're in. Yeah. Oh, this is exciting. Yeah. Thailand. I think you should go to Thailand on your own.

What's that place called? Go to Canterbury on your own to start with, I think. Hello from school. Nice to see you again. Hello. I'm actually travelling. I'm on. I'm solo travelling, actually.

Oh yeah, you've got your backpack on. Yes. Yeah. Just going to Devonham's where I used to work. I just having a... I'd love that for you. I think that that'd be great. I realized there would be a new single lady's in your area.

And listen to the one with Sophie Willing. Suddenly I didn't feel alone at all. And I laughed along with all three of you talking about Sophie's sex adventures. Oh, that was great. It was a really fun episode. The gestures she were making for how big that Willie was. Poor Ben sat in the corner. The one episode that Ben sat in one.

Yeah. Poor old Ben. Oh dear. I've been single for most of my life. now and really love it, definitely relate to your conversation about loving, living alone. Yes, please. And when I'm travelling is when I'm most miss having someone there. Yeah. Most, brackets all of my friends are coupled up. Many with kids so they can't go away for more than a couple of nights. Yeah, that's another thing about travelling on your own. You're not like waiting for someone to be like, I just need to get this time of work or I just need

to get childcare or I just need to, you're just like, oh, I've got four days off. See ya. Yeah. And you can do everything on your own. terms, like me and Lou Sanders, who's been a guest, have been snowboarding for the last few years. And we realised on this trip that just like working how you work together, like in the morning, she likes to get up. And then she sits there in her outfit, like, ready to go from like early in the morning. It's quite stressful. And she likes to say, I'm just chill. Like, I don't care about what we leave. But she's literally like, got goggles on her head. And you're a bit like, the lifts don't open yet. We literally can't leave. I find it very stressful. And then I like, like,

going down like really fast and she likes kind of like going and like her own speed like having like breaks and like going off and like doing little like jumps at the side and things. Wow. And then we both realized we were like rushing for each other and like trying to to go for the other person and actually like I like to have breaks and she's likes to be a bit chiller in the morning. It doesn't actually make anyone go faster if you're like giving an energy of stress. And so she felt like pressured by me and I felt pressured by her and actually it was all cool. And so it's like, it's really nice we work that out, but it's nice to like not have that pressure. Like all of life is like trying to fit in with somebody else.

And so to have, just be on your own and not have to think about somebody else's schedule or what they want is very freeing. And you can really get the most out of your time travelling because you do everything that you want to do rather than half the things that you want to do. Yeah. You're like, I want to go to this place. So you just go to that place. And you're like, this is, and it's calm because you're just doing it. You're not holding anyone up. You're not rushing anyone.

It's like, oh, I did all the things I wanted to do. It's really nice. I can imagine it, but it's almost, I've never really done that. It's really, that's really, that feels so free. It's really lovely. And like, what I did, which is maybe a good way to start, is like, once, where was I? Norway, and I'd gone with a friend, and then she had to come home. And I was like, I think we'd booked to come home.

And I was like, I'm not ready to leave, you know. If you're all right, going back on the plane by yourself. I'm going to get a train and I got a train up and I went on this like beautiful snowy train where you feel like you're on the moon and I went from Bergen to Oslo and then I just stayed there for a few days on my own and it was like you have all the fun of like doing stuff with someone

but then if you just stay for just like a couple of days after it's like really nice Amy you're inspiring me this is very exciting okay ends by saying anyway you're doing great things sharing so many relatable stories experiences and feelings so thank you for that

And thanks to Sophie for giving me the nudge To try field a yes Neatis to get some guys Who are D-T-F-A-S-A-P Can't let this tan go to waste Love that Oh I love that And yeah, it's so

It's just so good Yeah When everyone is coupled up In a different space Yeah To just be like fuck it I'm gonna go off my own Yeah

I do a lot of stuff Like if I want to see a film Or a theatre show Or a gig I go to so many gigs on my, like music gigs on my own. Do you? Yeah. I mean, saying it out loud, it's not great.

But. No, I think it is great. I love that. I'll just go and, and I really done, I think at first, maybe when I was younger I'd be a bit like self-conscious. Like, are people going to think I'm on my own? No, I could not give a rat's ass, I think, the phrases. I love going to gigs on my own.

Again, you're like, I want to stand here or I want to sit there. I can go at the time I want to go. And it's like, it's just car. See, and I now can, I get that from doing gigs or whatever, like when you have to stay somewhere and you're doing your own show and you have the whole day in a town. Yeah. And I do really like it. Like, it can get like a little bit lonely sometimes, especially when you just like have to fill a day and you didn't like necessarily like choose to go there. Yes.

And then I will feel it great. Like I'll go to the cinema and have a great time. But I would never do that on my own at home or like make a choice to go somewhere. But I would like to do that. Yeah. Maybe start with that. and then build up to solo traveling. And then she's gone for a year.

She's taking a sabbatical for a year. Single ladies in Thailand. With Maybill. With the May which is coming along. Get you out there. Okay. So we're all going. So it's not solo traveling.

Prodice she's coming. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh yeah. It's not single traveling. It's all, fuck. I'm not very good at this. I'm going to learn it. It's funny because I always want to be on my,

and then you're the one that always wants to be. And it's very interesting that that's how we operate. Oh my God, that's really interesting. Yeah, because I feel like I never want to be on moon, but then I do so much stuff on my own. But maybe that's why I feel like I don't want to be on moon because I tick that box. Yeah.

And maybe you don't get much time on your own, so you're like kind of everybody just fuck off a bit. Yeah. Yeah, that's so interesting. We're learning. Who needs therapy.