Single Ladies In Your Area - Pre-date video calls, Muslim dating apps, and not putting up with nonsense with Fatiha El-Ghorri

Episode Date: June 6, 2025

This week on the podcast we welcome the incredibly funny and VERY wise, Fatiha El-Ghorri, who answers questions like: How do you not cringe through a pre-date FaceTime? What are the Muslim dating apps like? And can you get sued for telling someone their cravat is shit? Fatiha's debut novel 'The Perks of My Hijab' will be out next year and is available to preorder now!Harriet is performing her critically acclaimed stand-up show Everything Always Works Out For Me at the Leicester Square Theatre on Thursday 12 June 2025. For tickets and information head to harrietkemsley.com.We want to hear your dating stories! Email in at [e-mail] Single Ladies In Your Area on Instagram @singleladiespodAnd follow Fatiha @fatiha.elghorriRecorded and edited by Aniya Das for Plosive.Artwork by Welcome Studio. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, single ladies. It's Harriet Kemsley. I'm so excited that I'm going to be doing my last tour day of the year. We've added on Leicester Square Theatre. I can't really believe it. It's on, it's very soon. It's the 12th of June Thursday. There's only a few tickets left and I'd love to see some of you guys in the crowd. If you're free, come along. It's called Everything Always Works Out For Me, because as you all know, it didn't. And you can get tickets from harrietkembslee.com. I hope to see you there. Lots of love.

Time to check on the skies. It's another sunny day in Calgary. Forecast calls for high levels of economic activity. Late afternoon, we've got a burst of potential in a place ranked North America's most livable city. Tomorrow, blue sky thinking in the blue sky city should hold steady and the outlook remains optimistic throughout the week. So come grab your dreams and enjoy watching them take hold. It's possible in Calgary, the blue sky city. For the full economic forecast visit calgaryeomicdevelopment.com. out there. We're desperately trying to figure out what the hell we should be doing. So we're going to speak to experts, chat about dates we've been on, if we managed to get any, and share your tips and horror stories so we all feel less

alone. We might even get our exes on. Yeah we'll see about that. This is Single Ladies in Your Area. Hello, hello, hello, hello. You sound like an old witch. What's happened to me? Hello. Hello children. No, I don't think I am okay Amy, I just keep saying hello. We are very lucky to have a fantastic guest today, Fatiha El Ghori. And also I talk about the very confusing times that's been happening in my life and why I am like a Kim. Hello. Hello. Hello baby.

Hello baby. Very nice to see you. So nice to see you. Here we are, single ladies still. Can you believe it? It just continues. Well because you look so pretty. You look so pretty.

I always think you're so pretty. You're so pretty. I think it's amazing you're talking. I just look at you and I'm like, oh my goodness. I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm so pretty. You look so pretty. I always think you're so pretty. You're so pretty. I think it's imagine you're talking, I just look at you. I should be thinking about why she's saying that.

She's so pretty. Oh my God. You're like a model. I've been seeing your face on buses. You cannot escape my face. You are the most beautiful woman that's ever existed in fictional fact. I'm like, I'm going to be a model. I'm going to be a model.

I'm going to be a model. I'm going to be a model. I'm going to be a model. I'm going to be a model. I'm going to be a model. I'm going to be a model. I'm going to be a model. I'm going to be a model. I'm going to be a model. been seeing your face on buses. You are the most beautiful woman that's ever existed in fictional facts. It's astonishing how beautiful you are. Oh God. You must walk around London just being like, yeah, yeah, that's me. That's me. That's me. It has all been a bit weird the last little while. Because yeah, my face was just kind of everything. It was like very confused. It was very confusing.

So I did this show last one laughing. It's amazing. And you're so good at it. So it's so fun. But a lot of times you do things and they're like fun. But then you do it and like maybe a few people will be like, Oh, I this one I've never known so everyone in my life has seen it it's like so confusing okay sometimes you do things and you don't think them through like sometimes I do things and I don't think them through or think what it could mean and in it I do a piece where I do what I think is like a very unsexy strip tease. So like, I take off bandages, I remove compression socks, and then I take off pants, then I take off more. I don't want to give that's basically all of it. And then there's a fun bit where it looks like I'm shooting ping pong balls out of my vagina. And I just thought it was like really fun.

And I have never had more messages in my life. And the thing is most of them have been like so respectful, but I think in their heads, they're subconsciously like, she fires ping pong balls out of her vagina. Wait, you're saying messages from men? Messages from men online. Like it's been crazy, but like none of them I can reply to because I don't know who they are. And I think, I don't think she'll mind me saying this, but Lou has also had like so many messages, but you can't like, you're like, Oh, maybe you could meet someone that

way. But then you click on the profiles and then it's like, they don't have a profile and you can't see who they are. I can't meet someone this way. And then also I was like, Oh, is it just cause they think I'm, I can shoot ping pong balls out of my vagina? And like, I can't, well, I don't know. I've never tried. I've never tried everybody. So maybe I could. I believe in you.

Maybe. I need to find out if I can and then come back to everybody. But I didn't really think like that through maybe. But I just thought it was fun and silly. It was incredible. And it was so funny and charming and hilarious. Sure, yes, you are shooting big pulls out of a vagina. Or it's a Daily Mail called it my nether regions.

Oh my God. I'm so proud that your nether regions have been mentioned in a tabloid. It's finally happened. I knew a day would come when the tabloids were talking about your vagina and it has happened. So I did an interview with the Daily Mail as I was doing it. I was like, oh, this NPU thing. And I was like, yeah, it's fine. And then it started. Within three minutes, I completely lost my mind. It's like, I'm trying to do the interview, but I'm just thinking of all

the things I've already said that I shouldn't have said. It's like so stressful. And then she was so lovely, like the woman that interviewed me, she was so sweet. I really liked her. Then she was like, you've got podcasts about being single, like do men find it attractive? You know, like that thing about female comedians. And you know, obviously they don't. Obviously they don't find it attractive. But I've been trying to change the narrative a bit because I wasn't able to grow up in a world where being funny is hot like

Women being funny is hot and they don't find it hot Then just like oh, you know because you're demand finder and then I was like, well you should see my DMs But then as soon as I said it I was like, oh my god It's that sound like so arrogant or crazy and it is the headline gonna be like something about that the headline? Oh my god This was on like on Easter and I was like at home with my family and it finally I got sent through and it was Like comedians from last one laughing. She says her DMS go wild after shooting Exclusive.

And I was like, oh my God, I'm going to die of embarrassment. I'm so embarrassed. But then I was like, no, there's nothing wrong with this. Technically, there's nothing wrong with this. And like, I'm sure if I was to reply to any of these men, they'd be like, oh, go away. And I still couldn't get a date in real life. So I thought this is so confusing. All these men are messaging me, but nobody is asking me out in real life.

I'm going around everywhere and nobody is asking me out. I don't understand. I'm so confused by the world. I really would like a boyfriend. And it's just so confusing. Fuck. That was so much information to take in. Yeah. So you've done an exclusive in a tabloid newspaper by accident

about how many DMs you've got. But then you said the phrase, I'm trying so hard. I'm going around everywhere. I'm going around trying. Nobody's asking me out. I really want a boyfriend. And all this happened from pretending to shoot ping pong balls out of your vagina or the nether regions

as the Daily Mail tabloid called it. They made it seem so scandalous. I don't know, it just made it seem so. And then I was like, I don't know. It was just so odd to me, like the way that it was phrased. Yeah. It's just so confusing. Yes, that's what they're known for, isn't it?

Exactly. And then I was like, okay, look, I'm getting all these messages, but I don't know who any of these people are. And you shouldn't just trust people that send you messages. They don't even have fucking profiles you can click on. So I was like, I'm going to take the power back. So I'm going to get hysterical. This is so embarrassing.

But I don't think it is. I was trying to take the power back and I bought 12 roses on Hinge. This is so embarrassing. But I don't think it is. I was trying to take the power back and I bought 12 roses on Hinge. And then I've just been acting like the bachelor. I was just handing out roses. A one for you. Very few reply.

Very few reply from my roses. But I just wanted to feel like I'm going to pick because this will feel so confusing and I can't date those people. So I just wanted to feel like I'm gonna pick, because this all feels so confusing and I can't date those people, so I'm gonna pick some people. And then I was always getting messages from people saying ping pong. So I was like, on the dating apps,

just people saying ping pong. Wait, people on the dating apps are saying that? Yeah, picture of a table turned his back. And they're just saying ping pong. Wait, this isn't in your DMs, this is on the dating apps. No, this is on the apps. They're saying, no, hurry up. Ping pong. And so I was like, I'm going to give out the roses and I'm going to be like the bachelor. I was giving out these roses like a king or something, just like I give out the roses, I decide.

You know when kings about the roses? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got too hysterical to talk. It's been the maddest month of my life. But then I did get a date. I did get a date. With someone who I presume hasn't seen the show. Someone who hasn't seen the show.

The one person in the UK that hasn't watched it in its entirety. You've given him a rose, waited for the response of, oh, you're going to shoot that out of your vagina. But he's not, he's gone, thank you for the rose. And you've gone, oh. Yeah. Oh, hello. Yeah. And they like, I think they like it when you give them roses. Like they're not used to it. They're not used to receiving them. And you can give out roses for free. But then I was trying to speed up the process, so I bought 12. Like a king. Like a king with his roses.

Giving them out. Anyway, one of them replied, we were chatting a bit and then we arranged to go on a date. So you sent a rose, chat, chat, chat on the app. Chat, chat, chat. And you're going on a date, this is huge. Yeah, really huge. And like really like, it was just like quite straightforward and like quite simple. And I'm now, I'm not going into the whole conversations before in the apps because I just imagine they're somebody and then they're not who I imagined. Not even

that it's bad, it's just I've imagined a thing and then it's too confusing and jarring as to who they actually are. And so I'm going to go on this date, but I'm like, before I'm like, oh, can't really be bothered, you know, my good jeans were in the dryer. I took them out and I put them on and they were like quite damp. And so I was like, do I wear jeans that are very... Do I turn up in damp jeans? I don't know what's right here. Oh my God, I'm on the edge of my seat finding out what you went for. In the end, I didn't wear the damp jeans. Old me would have worn the damp jeans, but I was like, you know what, you shouldn't go on a date in damp jeans. They weren't just

a bit damp. They were like really damp. And if you were to touch me in any way, you'd be like, oh, did you fall in a puddle or something like on your way? Did you pee yourself or are you so turned on? Are you so crazy turned on? When you stood up to leave, you've left an ass print on the plastic of the chair. That's so true. That's what I would have done. That's so true.

You'd be like, fuck me, what's happened there then? So thank God I didn't do that. I just wore these jeans that, Bobby used to call like my straight and mom jeans. So it had a real vibe of like, I'm just in straight and being a mom. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Straight on some jeans. They're like not flattering in any way. And like dirty trainers. This is a vibe.

This is cool. I was like, oh, whatever. Like, you know, this is just like inconvenient. And then I got there and he was really fit. And I haven't had that yet where I got on a date and I was like, oh my God, he's really fit. And I was like a bit panicked and a bit like, I'm glad my jeans aren't damp. I wish I'd gone for an outfit that was slightly more flattering. Did you see him and go, oh no, these jeans have just become damp. I couldn't

just put the wet ones on to start with. He's so fit. Wow. So where did you meet? Pub? In a pub. Yeah. He'd known that I did comedy. He was like sweet, he didn't watch my stand up or anything, which I really liked. I didn't want them to know too much. Then because he didn't know everything, didn't know, I ended up saying, yeah, I got a dog, and then yeah, I had a baby, and then yeah, I got a divorce, and then started a podcast about dating. And it was within a three year period and it just after you end up saying it like back to back like that I was like what the fuck is wrong with me?

So it's like you had the dog and then you had the baby and then you got the divorce and then you do a podcast about dating and say, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Then you leaned in for the kiss. Yeah. These trainers are dirty. But my jeans dry as a burn. Let's kiss. And I hope you enjoyed your rose. And was it a good date?

It was. It was nice. Yeah. That's lovely. Yeah. And did you, did you lunch? Didn't lunch. It was, it was nice. Yeah. That's lovely. Yeah. And did you, did you lunch? Didn't lunch. It was, it was nice and he was attractive. And I was like, I was like, yeah, I'm ready to get back out there and date.

How, this is brilliant. Yeah, I feel like ready. Like I started the year in such a grump. And then this year has just been quite intense for many reasons. And now I'm like, yeah, few, let's get out there. Oh, you had a nice day with a fit guy. This is fantastic.

You did the app, you smashed that. You got a date, you smashed the date. Ladies, you get, I think you get two roses for your day. On a hinge, you get your two free roses, get them out, come back the next day. And if you're really feeling flashy, you buy a dozen. Buy a dozen roses like a king, the king package. Yeah I had some of them replied and they were like oh my god thank you so much for my rose.

They were like so touched by the rose, no one had ever given them a rose before. Like they really loved getting roses so that's what I recommend. It's like I think I've said it before of that thing of like how women are meant to like give a nod to men that they're interested or like they used to drop their like handkerchief or whatever to show they liked about it. It's like you just dropped my little rose and then they have to do the work but. Harriet this is bloody wonderful. God I have such high hopes for us this season. Yeah this season is different. Yeah, it literally is. Yeah, I have hair fever now. Yeah, the pollen count is high. I got a hair fever injection today this morning. Never had it before, so we'll see.

We'll see. Is this sexy chat? Is that what they want? Sexy? I tell you what, I had to get my ass out. Do they have to do it in the arse? I asked for it. They said, excuse me, madam, it's on the arm.

I don't think so, buddy. And then she did it in my arm with my ass out. So maybe that's going to help me dating over the summer months. Well, we have a wonderful guest coming up. We do. God, what a wonderful guest. Let's get her on. Oh, just I love her. Can I say that? Yeah.

Am I allowed to say that? Yeah. These days? I love her, okay? It's the wonderful, very, very wise, Fatiha El-Ghouri. Is this flirting? Fatiha El-Ghouri is here. Woo woo woo woo woo! Is this flirting? Fatiha El-Ghoria is here.

Woo woo woo woo woo! Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Wait, why don't you see me every week? Well, I see you like monthly. Yeah, I think that's more my vibe actually. So you've been having chats at these gigs. Yes. About dating. Yeah. Okay. Well, I need to be caught up to speed. I feel left out.

I want to know what's going on with you. Tell us what is your relationship status currently? Single. Single. Single. Yeah, single. I feel like my whole relationships experience is probably, I would compare it to Hades. Okay. Like Hell?

Hell, yeah. The picture of Hell. I didn't know if that was like a pub somewhere or something. Is that the island they go to on Love Island? Is this something from Morocco? What is this girl talking about? Is that how you make the most? the island they go to on love island. Is this something from Morocco? What is this girl talking about? Is that how you make them?

So yeah, it's just hell man. It's hell innit? It's the pits of hell out here. Are you two seen anyone? No, no. Well, every time I see this bitch Amy, Gledhill, she's always like, I'm dating right now.

You have got me confused with somebody else. I don't know what you're telling Fattie. What's happening here is every time I see Fattie, I say who I've got a crush on. And Fattie has taken that as that they like me back. But it's not. It's so different to that. I'll be like, yeah, I really like this boy, I'm going to try and see him in like two weeks or something. And Fati's taken that as like dating, but in actual fact, it's me just looking at someone's

Instagram. I always take things and exaggerate them by 10. So you're like, Fati, I fancy this guy. I'm like, bitch, they're getting married. Harriet, have you got a dress? Like, what the fuck? We do a podcast every week together. She's not going to be a single lady anymore. This is crazy.

No, no, very much still single, Fatia. Thank you for just clarifying that. And so you're single. Yeah. When's the last time you were in a relationship? About a year ago. Oh, fresh. Fresh. You're fresh.

Fresh. Oh my God. And how long was that relationship? Like half a year. So I think about a couple of months. Not a couple of months. Yeah. But enough where it's like, it's a thing. It's a proper thing. Then you came out of it. Your decision, mutual decision. No, his broke my little heart

Yeah, Dolly Parton, bro It's gonna see him every week I'm gonna see But it's a common theme, yeah. I find with like dating nowadays, guys will date you for a long time and then go, oh, I'm not ready. I'm like, are you fucking mad, bro? In it, in it. Are you fucking mad? That's like having pizza every day for like six months and going, I don't like this actually. Are you fucking mad? That's like having pizza every day for like six months and going, I

don't like this actually. Are you fucking insane? Yes. No, no. So this is what they're doing. I'm finding that. And a lot of my female friends are saying the same thing. Do you find that? Like you date them for a little bit and then they go, I'm not ready for a relationship. We've not been dating long enough. We've never got to that stage. But it's definitely something I have heard that people are slower to settle down. There's more availability. There's more things out there. They don't want to get settled. They want to stay out there. That's what they say is the negative of the apps.

It's like, the good thing is there's loads of choice, but the bad thing is there's loads of choice. So people are going, well, what if I could do like 1% better? Yeah, exactly me and Lou was saying this other day. It's a bit like I'm like, is it higher or lower? Do you risk it to see if you could get a little bit higher or do you think? Whatever it's left like where do you end up like that's it. That's what's tricky about it Yes, and we will you end up? Like that's what's tricky about it. Yes, and we will always end up with the joker.

We know this, we know this. At least you get that, I'll get that card that doesn't even mean anything. In the pack, no, like the one you fucking throw away. That's the card I get, that's the card I get. Okay, so we get a sense of how you're feeling about dating. So how have you felt being single? So you've come out of this relationship heartbroken.

Yeah. How did you like get straight back out there? You like, I feel like you're pretty like robust. You're kind of resilient and you're strong. So I imagine you could just be like, fuck you, bruv. I'm getting back on the horse. I am. All those things.

Yeah. But I really did care for him. I really, I loved him. And then like, yeah, and we matched on so many different things. We were, our lives. I thought you were going to say abs. It was funny. We're going to match RMR.

Yeah, so that it was hard. It was really hard to like, and I just couldn't believe it. I was heartbroken man, like crying all the time. You know,, and you don't you know when you don't get closure as well Like kind of they're just like I don't see anymore what and block block block. I'm insane. Are you a builder, bro? Yeah I'm telling you it was like that Yeah, it was really hard. So sorry. And then I just deleted everything and I was like, fuck these guys, I'm not dealing with

this, I'm not doing this. Yeah. There's a problem with dating as well because if you stay out of it too long, then you have to start from the bottom I find. Whereas if you're in it, then you're just sifting through shit and hopefully you'll find something good. But if you keep on deleting and re-coming, you just start from the bottom again.

And then also, I think like every time you have an interaction with someone, you learn more about what you want and what you don't want, and what you'll accept and what you won't accept. And these things are forever evolving and changing. So for me, I have to stay on it even if I don't want to. Sometimes I get so bored and like of it and I'm like, fuck these guys. And sometimes I troll them and stuff like that.

I'm like, bruh. I would love to see what you're writing. Oh my God. I troll them. I'm like, listen, I'm from the hood. I'm not like these other girls. Don't play with me. And then I end up getting all these drug dealers. And then it's like, but I want like other girls don't play with me. And then, and then, and then I'm getting all these drug dealers and then it's like, but I want like, I don't know, man, I'm attracted to that kind of shit. Well, not drug dealers because I don't want to go

prison or nothing. Hello. But like bad guys, a little bit, a little bit. And I think that's because I'm from the hood. So I kind of like that a bit. But that guy that I was telling you about, he was nothing like that. He was a middle class twat bro. Like properly. Turned up to the first date in a cravat. I was like, what the fuck is that? Like, do you know what I mean? It was insane. So it was like, I hope you hear this prick. I hate your cravats. And then- Yeah, you cravats shit mate. Oh my god, can you imagine if he texts me and go,

I'm gonna sue you for chatting about me. I'll be like, come bro, bring it. Let's see how far you get, dickhead. So, um... I'm so worried about getting sued, Fadiah. I know, yeah, yeah, yeah. Why do you have to act as if we thought it would be chatting about it? He's trying to sue you all the time. I don't think you can get sued for saying his cravat shit.

I hope not. I hope not. So yeah, he was just so different and that's what I liked. I like stuff that's like different and I like people that have their own life and are independent and stuff like that. I don't want like, yeah, I don't want a guy to be like in awe or be in awe of my heart and the person that I am, but not what I do, like, do you know what I mean? Yeah, it's to be excited about comedy.

Yes, obviously be happy for me and be supportive and stuff like that, but don't like, I don't want like, oh my God, I'm with a comedian. It's like, yeah, so kind of whatever, man. Yeah, I'm with a guy that wears a cravat and what? It's not that magical guys. Nothing I write and soundstage will ever be funnier than your cravat. Calgary, also known as the blue sky city. We get more sunny days than anywhere in the country, but more importantly, we're the Canadian capital of blue sky thinking. This is where bold ideas meet big opportunity, where dreams become reality. Whether you're building

your career or scaling your business, Calgary is where what-if turns into what's next. It's possible here in Calgary, the Blue Sky City. Learn more at calgaryeconomicdevelopment.com. Another one with a fish. It's interesting what you're saying about it changes, you get older, like what you want, what you'll accept. I think the problem for me, I don't know about you, is that what you'll accept gets less and less. The list gets smaller and smaller of what you want, what you'll accept. I think the problem for me, I don't know about you, is that what you'll accept gets less and less. The list gets smaller and smaller of what you'll tolerate. What I want is so much clearer, but that makes such a narrow kind of path. Yes. And also I find like when I'm speaking, I'm speaking from my perspective as a straight

woman, right? So like I find that because we don't need men anymore. And what I mean, like our parents did, do you know what I mean? Then you need a man financially, you need, there's loads of things you need, like from a man in back in those days. Now we don't need that. We want companionship and love. Do you know what I mean? And that kind of stuff. We don't want like, I don't know, I don't need you to pay my bills. I don't need that shit. I just need you to be my partner, love me, respect me, support me. And men struggle with that because it's like, no, but I'm the breadwinner. I'm this, I should be earning more. No, bruv, that's toxic masculinity. It don't matter who earns more. Like as long as we respect each other and act accordingly, do you know what I mean? Like move correct and everything is all right.

And this is what they struggle with. Thank you. You're so fucking wise. I can't handle this. You're so fucking cool and wise. I think it's so true. I think it's also that we used to need them for like safety, you know? You had to have one that was going to look out for you and protect you.

And now, I mean, still, things can still improve, you know, out there. Things can get a bit dicey out there. But we don't need that anymore. You're not looking to a man to feel safe anymore. No, because they're the scariest thing. Exactly, they're the problem. Yeah, they are. Statistically, it's true. They're the ones you've got to watch out for.

Anyway, can't wait to find love, guys. I think it's hard being a woman that dates men. Full stop. Full stop. I think it is. It's hard. It is hard for all them reasons. Like where I think you're right, where like the first generation that this is really different.

Like the gender roles, gender itself, like everything's kind of changing and we're all kind of navigating it. And it's all a bit like up in the air. Like these guys don't really have many role models to look up to in terms of like strong men who managed to be like companions, like that was never, I've never thought about before, but you're right, it wasn't the front and main issue of like, oh, I just want to be a woman's companion and respect her. It's like, I will provide. I will own the property and drive the car.

And I will take the bins out and she will do the laundry. Like, it was all very different. And now it's like, we just want like a pal, like a sexy pal. Yes. We just want a sexy pal. And that's so true. And it must be confusing for them. Because they're like, wait, what do you want?

Sorry, I've got my mate. So you want to be my friend? Hang on. Oh God. Yeah, but then they're like, oh, you just want to be friends and have sex? Is that what you want? Okay, you catch the feels, I'll break your heart honey. Do you know what I mean?

It's that kind of shit. I'm like, I don't know, but this is, I'm probably gonna get a bit of shit for this, but I'm gonna say, I think this is the problem with casual sex, this is the problem. If they can have casual sex with you, why am I gonna get into a relationship with you, where I can just sleep with you and see you when I want,

we do with that whenever I want, and I'm able to sleep with other people. And I'm not knocking that, because everyone's choices is their own, and we should respect everyone's choices. But it is a problem, because they think everyone's like that. They don't take you at face value.

It's like, well, she done it with me. I'm like, yeah, but I'm not her and she's not me. Like, I'm looking for something different. And it's okay, and this is another thing. It's okay if you're looking for that, but you need to fucking tell me. Yeah. Don't string me along. That's it. Just don't lie.

Yeah, this is it. Lying should be illegal. I'm sorry. I think it should be illegal. They do. I think it's so rude. I think it's so rude to lie and to pretend that you want something and then you don't. That is so rude and you should go to jail. And that's just what I think. You should be able to sue men that lie. Let's turn the tables. We're going to sue all of you fuckers that lie. It shouldn't be allowed.

I can't believe it. I get gobsmacked. It's like I'm so gullible and they're like, haha, got you again. And you're like, why would you do that? Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! See you in court! Ow! Say it with me, I'm a goddess. You, like me, are a divorcee.

Yaha. How have you found dating after a divorce? I've been divorced for a long time, so it's been like, I think 15 years or something like that. And I've been married and divorced twice because I don't learn the first time. I like dramas. I love the courts. That's why I'm always talking about suing.

I need me a lawyer. Is there a lawyer out there? You do. Yeah, there's two. You need a lawyer. We can just argue and have trials at home. Who's going to change the bins? Who's going to frighten the coffee granules?

Well, I love this. Exhibit A. I can't even say exhibit. I said exhibit A. Already fling me out of court. But yeah, I find so that obviously I'm a Muslim woman. So Muslim dating is very different to Western dating, I guess, or like, I guess I don't know what else to call it. Because people make men make out like they want to get married. They're like, oh, I'm intentionally dating. I'm like, you're intentionally going to get knocked out. That's what's going to happen. You know what I'm saying? Well, so far it sounds pretty similar to Western dating.

Yeah, this is what I mean. Because all, like you get bad people in every community, isn't it? And stuff. So you do get the guys that are like some of their, some of their bios are like, I want marriage only. And I'm like, in that voice. That's how it happens. It's not happening in Weston House. Honestly, and I'm like, Rob, Rob, you need to relax. And he's like, I want women that pray five times a day and marriage! I'm like, what? And they're writing capitals.

They leave a voice note as well. There is, there's one date, Muslim date, where you can leave voice notes and of yourself and things like that. So some of them, they're very direct in that way. But then, but like, it's not just about marriage. Like you, a marriage is, I don't know, like you have to be compatible. Yeah. And some just like, I don't know. Yeah, they can be a bit weird. They can be very, they're direct, like, but then you also, you get the ones that are like, listen, I want to get married as soon as possible. I'm like, okay, all right, I'll see you in an hour. You haven't met them yet. And stuff like, and then there's guys, because a lot

of, we don't, because sex outside of marriage is forbidden. So a lot of men don't want to do that. So that's why they want to get married like quickly. They're horny. They're writing that with an erection. I need to get married in the next 15 to 20 minutes, ideally. My balls are going to hurt. Okay, I get it. So that's why you get that.

But like I said, there's more to relationship than... They're the same as these guys that just want to sleep around and stuff like that, but not... Really? Yeah, but just not open. I mean, I'm very naive, but if I was like, in my head, a Muslim dating site would be like so much more respectful and so much more like not about the sex or anything like that. It would just be like, I don't know. Because it's religious.

You think everyone's being thoughtful and thinking about things. Yeah, caring and like, no? No, because. It's just like, in. They're all just like in. Yeah, I'm telling you. Because this is what I mean.

It's a, you get it in all groups. You know, the first thing they'll be like, can you send me a full picture of yourself? I'm like, I've got six on my profile, dickhead. Yeah? Can you not open your fucking eyes and look? Honestly, I'm like, don't play with me, bro. I'll tear you up. Don't play with me.

I will send you some nasty shit, right? And then you'll be halfway typing back trying to chat shit, and I'll fucking block you. How about that? Wow. Black plug, baby. you'll be halfway typing back trying to shut shit and I'll fucking block you. How about that? Cuss them and then block because they start to write back. So yeah, you get shit like that. Or they'll go, I'm serious. I'm looking for marriage, but I need to ask you a question. And I go, all right. And I know what they're going to ask. And they go, I've got a high sex drive. That's the, that's, do you get that on dating apps as well? You don't.

I've never had that. So they go, I've got a really high sex drive. What do you think about that? I'm like, nothing, because we're not having sex ever, because you're a tool. Do you know what I mean? This is something you build up. This is something you build up to that you feed somebody.

You see if there's a connection first. This isn't your, oh, like your thing about thing about oh, are you do you like to drink? I only want someone that doesn't drink. Yeah, it's not like that. It's like you get to know somebody I get a lot of those sex drive ones. I've got high sex drive I'm like and I say but it's not that's not what it's about if you're trying to get a partner based on that You're not gonna ever be happy. If you're trying to get a partner based on that, you're not going to ever be happy. It will only fulfill one part of... Maybe I can give you...

Sorry, actually, I can give you what you need. Let me rephrase. Very well, okay? And it turns out I have a high sex drive with other people. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not with you, but yeah. My sex drive is so high with people that don't mention this. The second you do, it drops off. Exactly, like so direct. But like just, and then I'm just like, no, I don't,

no, leave me alone. And it's just, it's one sided in it. That's all you want. And what's going to happen? Like you can have the best sex is when you're connected, when there's a connection and they don't understand that. They don't understand that. They don't get it. And I'm just like, I don't have. And weirdly, I think, you know, these people that speak about sex like that in terms of like high sex drive and stuff, you know, they're bad in bed. Yes, exactly. Because people that are good at sex don't think of it like that. Exactly. You know that they're just like a... Oh great, no wonder it's so high because you can do it in three seconds. You idiot.

And that is the truth. We're all wise. We're all wise. We're all the same amount wise. And that's another, actually with sex as well, we're all wise. We're all the same amount wise. And that's another actually with sex as well. Another issue is porn. Like these guys are so porn obsessed and they'll be like, I've got, is it okay if I choke you? I'm like, excuse me, I've only spoken to you for 10 seconds.

This is on the app. Yeah, this is on, and this is on both of the apps, I get that. But a lot, like, yeah, I would say mostly, on the Muslim ones, they come forward with sex and kinks and all that straight away. Really? Yeah, they're very forward. Whatever happened to, like, do you have siblings? Yes, yes. Whatever happened to that?

Yes. What's your favorite color? Yeah. Mind's green, can I choke you? Yeah, it's crazy. Do you not get that? Do you not get guys being like that? Maybe I'm picking the wrong guys. I'm wondering what you're putting on your profile.

Honestly, at the moment. Oh yeah, let's victim blame. But in fact, it's never been like, come slut chock chock. 86, like, I don't know, like, slut ch another good point. Do you use your real name? I do. Yeah. Yeah.

Only because I use my full name. Is that including middle name? Is that bad? That's okay. But passport number. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's cool. I was going to say that's okay, but you're about to get a mortgage that you didn't sign up for.

I'm going home. Lovely, actually. It's a match. How do you deal with being a comedian and dating? I'm just honest with them when they ask. Yeah, I'm just honest. But sometimes I feel like they don't take you seriously. I'm like, I'm a comedian.

They're like, okay. And then just carry on. And you're like, oh, I'm kind of a big deal. I don't know how to say this. I'm a fucking big deal. No. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not.

I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not. I just feel like it's not... I just feel like... I feel so terrible.

I just feel like it's a bit... You know how you would be interested if they said, oh, I'm a chef or something. I'd be like, all right, what kind of food, cuisine, how long you've been doing it, is it something you've done from young? Yeah. Just how you get to know someone, but they don't ask that. And I don't know if it's because maybe they're intimidated or they just think, oh, this bimbo has got a, she's just messing around.

Because I did tell this one guy and then when I sent him a clip of the video, he was like, shit, you've got Wikipedia page. And I was like, oh shit, oh shit. Oh shit. And I was like, yeah. And he's like, you're famous. And I was like, I'm not famous, but I like, this is my job. Like I did tell you. I'm a comedian, like for one day a week and then I work in a bakery or something.

I'm kind of a comedian down the pub. Exactly. So sometimes I don't think they take it seriously. And sometimes maybe that's because of intimidation or maybe because they don't care because they just want to sleep with you or I don't know what it is. I think a lot of it, like I haven't had this so much with guys, but with my hairdresser, the rage is going and she's like, what have you been doing at work? And I'm like, well, I'm a comedian, so I've been doing my shirt. And you can see in her eyes, she's thinking, you liar.

You liar. And then the next time I'll go and I'm like, I've done a thing on I'm getting my hair done because I'm doing a thing on TV. She's like, you know, she's not because I go into such a state as well. Like no makeup, like a, like a rat's nest. I only do my hair when I have a TV thing coming up, and I'm like, oh, I have to get my fucking hair done so that I can look good for this.

I'm going on the Jonathan Rusher. This girl is insane. She's fucking insane. And I feel like she's looking around me like, what am I supposed to say to her? She's mad. I can't work with this. She's mad. Yeah. But then somebody, not my hairdresser, but someone in the salon saw me on something and went, oh my God, I saw you on whatever. And I saw my hairdresser like, it was like, have you actually been on the job Lennon show? I was like, yes, and you did my hair for it.

Did I? Yes! Fuck! But so it's the same thing. I think maybe like guys go, oh, she's a comedian. Kind of go, yeah, ball it. Like, sure. Yeah, me too. Oh, I'm a professional footballer, and that's not...

Do you know what I mean? I think maybe that's why they move on so quick. And it's like, sure. Yeah, maybe. Or they're just not interested in what a woman has to say. Yeah. One or the other. It's definitely that too. Do you get people like that when you, if you match with someone and you start talking, do they go and you go, I'm a comedian. Are they like, oh my God, I've seen your stuff and, or do you, or do you ever get people that are not interested? The same as like what happens? Yeah. Do you get that? Well, I say I'm a writer because I'm just too cowardly to say comedian She's pathetic, but we did a like a group speed dating thing

Mm-hmm and a guy walked over who was doing my material at me and it was like well, this is hell This is actual hell. We discussed what the worst case scenario would be before the day and it arrived. It arrived full of energy, very giddy actually, bounded over. Oh, you're from who? Blah, blah, blah. Oh no, that looks like, oh shit. And then proceeded to say what episode of Off Menu Harriet was on, then what episode I was on. And then other people were going like, what? What? And we were sat like, oh no. Did they know you were going to be there? Or was it just random? Yeah. I've hosted a speed date before, but I can't do it. And I can't do like, you know, it's

like, oh, let's all meet for dinner and all the singles. And because I know a guy will look at me and just be sick. And I'm like, I don't want that. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. One second. That was one of the craziest sentences I've ever heard. You were just going to say that. I mean, hurry on. Yeah, I can't take it. Like when they look at you and then you see the disappointment in their eyes, I'm like, mm-mm. So before I go on dates, I'm always very honest in my pictures, on my profile, like I don't hide anything. I don't do those pictures that are just your

head and all that shit, like looking up into the sun, which is very dangerous guys. I don't do any of that shit. I'll take real pictures. Yeah. I think that's really important for everybody. And then I always FaceTime. That's another thing. FaceTime before you go on a date, because they can be using fake pictures. They can be using pictures that are 20 years old, all kinds of shit. But is that not the most stressful? Like I would rather sit for someone uncomfortably for three hours than have a two minute FaceTime. It is, it is, it is real. I'm like, fuck, and then I have to put my makeup on. They're like, can you FaceTime now? I'm like, no, I'm a Muslim woman that wears a hijab. That

requires time. Lipstick, lipstick, lipstick, lipstick. Exactly. And then get ready and then I'll do the FaceTime. How long are the FaceTimes? Just like five, 10 minutes. Amazing. And so you say, can we have a FaceTime? Yeah, I say that. I say, listen, they're like, can we go on a date? Just like five, 10 minutes. Amazing. So you say, can we have a face time?

Yeah, I say that. I say, listen, they're like, can we go on a date? I'm like, after we FaceTime and then. Amazing. Have you ever FaceTimed and gone, no date? No. Interesting. And you keep them brief because you're like, we don't want to go too into it.

Like, we need to meet in person, see if there's a vibe, but we'll just have a little. See what kind of stuff you ask. It's just kind of a. Just be like, ah, hi. So like, see if there's a vibe, but we'll just have a little... See, what kind of stuff do you ask? It's just kind of a... Just be like, oh hi, hi. So like, you'd be talking beforehand a lot. So I'll talk to someone a lot before I agree to go on a date. And then we have phone calls on the app. I don't give them my number, like, if they ask for it, I'll say, no, not yet. And then we just call in on the app and that. Then we do a FaceTime. Then we go to meet in person.

But sometimes, do the FaceTime and then it doesn't go any further than that for whatever reason, maybe that. And I say to them, I say, look, if you're not feeling it, it is not a problem. Just fucking tell me. I'm exactly the same. Yeah. Just be straight up. Yeah.

And I will be the same with you. Trust me. I'll be the same, but just say, if you don't feel, I don't like this ghosting business and stuff like that, or like, or they just let it die. I don't like that. I like to know where I stand. We're not for everybody. I don't need you to pretend that you're into it.

If you're not into it, let me know. See ya. I wasn't that into it either. I barely know you. Yes. Who are you? Exactly. And so I just like that, like being upfront, but it's very good to like FaceTime as well.

Cause sometimes like you can FaceTime and then they could, they might be doing stuff that's insane. And then you're like, I'm not, I don't know, like peeling potatoes with their teeth or something. I don't know. Wait, that's happened to you? No, but just some magic. Oh, that's what you're looking out for.

That's the kind of shit you're looking out for. Let me see this shady fool over here. So it's always good to like FaceTime and sometimes you can, you know, you just get a vibe of the person as well. I know what you mean about turning up on a date and the feeling of like this, like worry of their disappointment or seeing something in their eyes. Like that was one of like a huge fear. Like I completely agree that you want to be like completely like,

this is me. I don't want to pretend to be anything I'm not because I don't want to go somewhere. And then somebody be like, Oh, you don't ever want that to be the reaction for anybody. Yes. You'd rather be like putting kind of bad pictures up actually. And then when you arrive and they're like, okay, this is actually something I heard is that you should the first date, you should kind of go like not really make an effort because then the second date they're like, okay. This is actually something I heard is that you should, the first date, you should kind of go, like not really make an effort because then the second date they're like, oh, otherwise it's just downhill. Downhill.

Downhill. You do your best on the first date, it's just going to go down. So the first date just kind of turn up and then if they're kind of into it, then you're like, oh well, have I got a trip for you. Next time I'm going to brush my teeth. Okay. Oh, where deodorant, I guess. And pants.

Oh, that's downhill? Time to check on the skies. It's another sunny day in Calgary. Forecast calls for high levels of economic activity. Late afternoon, we've got a burst of potential in a place ranked North America's most livable city. Tomorrow, blue sky thinking in the blue sky city should hold steady. And the outlook remains optimistic throughout the week.

So come grab your dreams and enjoy watching them take hold. It's possible in Calgary, the blue sky city. For the full economic forecast, visit calgaryeconomicdevelopment.com. Amy, we've got to get out there. What's the last date you went on? The last date was maybe last summer. Okay. What did you do? Where did you go? We went to a nice, do you know, Edgeway Road? Yeah.

Yeah, because we're both Arabs and we like the Arab-ness of Edgeway Road. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So we went there and had a nice Arab meal and that was it. So yeah, but I wasn't feeling him and then I told him. Amazing. You told him to his face. On the date or afterwards? No, no, no. On the date I said to him I'm not sure. Okay.

But I said I need time to think and stuff like that. So I'm not sure. And then afterwards I said look, you're a cool guy but no. I think women have got so good at this. I like to be really like, it feels gross, like you feel so sick but to be like, it's not quite right. Yes. You just have to say it and then it's done and then it's like, oh, everything's clear. And there's a way about it, do you know what I mean?

Like, so I don't, I'm like, you're a nice guy, you treat me really nicely, you spoke to me nicely, you didn't cross any boundaries, you were really respectful and funny and we had lots in common, but I'm just not feeling it. So it's like needing. That's so good. Yeah, I do, no I do. But I'm not doing it to protect his feelings, I'm just not feeling it. So it's like leading. Yeah, I do. No, I do. But I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it to protect his feelings.

I'm doing it because it's true. Like those positive things are true and it's okay to be like nice like that. I go in with all their flaws. Is that bad? I say I'm not into it because of this. I've attached a PDF of your flaws. I really like to imagine you on a date because you're so like, strong and like, kind of come on the front foot. And then I reckon you're so sweet on a date.

You are. You're so stealthily sweet. You're what, like, I think you are like so strong and all of that, but also like adorable. And your heart is so big and you're so kind. I want woman that's pre-fifth time today. Oh, you lot are kind, man. Don't say those things. No, are you romantic? I am. Yeah, I am.

Oh, she bloody is. And I do like sweet those things. No, are you romantic? I am. Yeah, I am. Of course she bloody is. I am. And I do like sweet little things. I want a guy that's like to, because I'm like this, I want to share my highs and lows with you, my fears. I want to share my accomplishments, my failures, everything to be a proper partnership. When you're down, I'll pull you up.

When I'm down, you pull me up. If we both fall, we hold on and we fight together until we get up. These are the kinds of things I want. I'm really strong in that and I'm loyal as fuck. But these motherfuckers don't like that. They're like, I'll push you over. They're like, bitch, if you're low, it better be for what I'm thinking! And I do want those things, you know what I mean? And I do give those things in a relationship, but there's no one worthy of it, so like, you have to keep it to yourself.

Yeah, just hold on until you find it. I don't think I am. You know in Islam, yeah, Islam, God tells us you're made in pairs, so everyone has their other pair. But I don't know if I'll meet my pair here on earth or in the afterlife. Do you know what I mean? Wow. So this is, but you're born in pairs, everyone is.

Everyone has their other path and stuff. Can you be born in a three? The three of us, we found our pairs. I think that's really beautiful. But then isn't the idea that your pair would be here, the other side of your pair would be here? I don't know. Maybe.

I don't know. But I don't know if everybody meets them in this life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe it's in the afterlife. Because what if they're in Calais? I know. Hang on. Hang on. Do we what if they're in Calais? I know. Hang on, hang on.

Do we have to still date in the afterlife? I can't, I can't be fucked with that. No, surely they're waiting for you. You arrive and they're there, surely. Surely you arrive and they're like, I've been waiting for you. Yeah. Come on. Think of how many billion are on the earth.

7.2. In an afterlife, that's everyone that's ever existed. What you meant to sift through them and be like. They'll be there. They'll just be there and then you'll be there. They'll open the gates for you. Oh my God. Well, Paul Mescal is going to have to die before I do.

So is there waiting. Oh my God. He's here now. Who's the other geezer? Yeah. I'm happy. Hello. The sun.

Yeah. Basically, you know that geezer. Yeah. What's his name? Paul. Paul what? Yeah. Yeah.

I thought it was going to be Paul McCartney. Print that in your paper or I'll sue you. And then hashtag it, be like, I want women. I'll be the headline. The newspapers would have gone, you know, they'd be like AI. So when you open it, you go, I want women. Amy's changed. She's been hanging around that fatia too much.

Who is, have you got like a celebrity crush? Have you got like a dream? Honestly, in terms of physicality, okay, okay. I tell you, no, actually, you know what I do. I, so if in terms of the kind of guy, do you remember Sex and the City? The one it was the TV series? Yeah. Yeah. I think I heard it.

It takes a while. I keep on saying this is what my mom's like, how old are you? You come from Romans. What is this? I'm not sorry. I keep on going, she's like, yeah, sometimes I go, you know, Rashid, my brother, she'll go, yeah, like I had him. I don't know why I do that.

I've got such a bad, I'll go, you know, walkers, Chris, what? Honestly, I keep on doing that. It's so bad. It's such a bad habit. Okay. So sex in the city. Yeah. Do you remember Steve Miranda's, the barter? No, that's your type. Not physically, but that in the way that he was with her. Really sweet, really kind.

I don't remember. I love it. No, because Steve is somebody, he's not usually the one, like he's not the one that people would be like, oh, he's the hot ticket. Like, any of the hot tickets, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket.

Like, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket. Like, he's the hot ticket. somebody, he's not usually the one, like he's not the one that people would be like, oh, he's the hot ticket, like Aiden or Big, they're the big names in the Sex and City universe, should we call it? Yes, please.

Where Steve is Miranda's partner who works in the bar and is just really loyal and really kind. And fun. And they have a really sweet relationship and he really supports her and yeah, she's quite mean to him. But he takes it and he just kind of rolls with it. They end up having a baby. Yeah. It's just the way he was so sweet and I love that he's like, that's just him. Like he's a bartender and that is him. Like he's so, this is it. And I like that. I like that. And then like you said, he's just so sweet to. Like he's so, he knows himself. This is it. And I like that. I like that.

And then like you said, he's just so sweet to her and he just so normal and grounded. There's no like fucking ego and shit like that. There is tiny bit when it comes to money, because she invites him, there's one episode where she invites him to like a corporate do and then they end up falling out because she wants to get him a 2000 pound suit. And he's like, I can't afford that. She's like, well, I'm going to pay for it. He's like, no, you fucking ain't. Yeah. He doesn't feel comfortable in it. He wants to wear something that he feels. Yeah.

Go for Steve. Yeah, I love him. He's my like ideal. And then physically. Oh, I don't really have. I just like North African, Arab, Middle Eastern men. Oh, that's very funny to say I don't really have a type of a van. But sometimes it can be like an English geezer. I've never been with an English geezer. I've never dated an English geezer. I've never spoken to an English geezer. This is why your skin is so good and you look so young. You've stayed away from the British part. So this is the pro... Yeah. I don't know.

I've always been attracted. I think for me, a massive thing for me is like culture and having the same culture and traditions and stuff like that. I think that's a bit... And then it has to be Muslim as well. You know what my mom said to me? She's like, Fatiha, you need to marry a German guy. She said. She gets really...

She gets to be a guy who is German, but now he's Muslim, because he will be scared of Allah, so he will be very good to you. And I'm like, what? That's what my mom's saying. She's like, he will be very scared of God, and he will be good to you. And I'm like, so that's why he's going to be good to me, because he's scared. It's not because he's a good guy. She's like, he will be very scared of God and he will be good to you. And I'm like, so that's why he's going to be good to me because he's scared. It's not because he's a good guy. She's like, exactly.

What does it have to do with German? I don't know. I've got a clue. She's like, you need somebody that's reverted, like become a Muslim. I wasn't a Muslim. She's like, they treat their women very good for her. I'm like, not from the DMs they send me. Well, we need to plan a single ladies trip to Germany. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's a German guy here, mum, asking if he can choke me. Do I say yes to that? Doesn't seem very scared. And Fatiya, thank you so much for coming on. Thank you. It's such a pleasure to talk to you. I'm going to say our wisest guest. Yes.

Thank you. Yeah. And big heart. If I could vote for you to be the leader of the entire world, I genuinely would. I think you'd get shit done. Oh, for sure. Yeah. You're not going to put up with any nonsense.

Nope. No. And it's okay to not put up with nonsense, ladies. You know, I mean, you know, if he's not toeing the line, then he can go because you're going to have so many problems down the line. If you start just like letting things go and go obviously, like when we say compromise, I'm talking about compromising on like maybe he leaves his shoes at the front door when he comes, something like that, do you know? Or he always wears odd socks.

That's what we compromise on. We don't fucking compromise on treatment, respect, love, loyalty and honesty. You do not compromise on that. Fuck that shit. Why do you always clap over your head? Because this is the... You're like a seal. The higher I clap, the more esteem I'm giving to it. The more you stand behind it.

I can't clap any higher. She even did a salute. And that was fully involuntary. I feel it's so strong. You're her leader now. She wants you into battle. Yeah, teach us. Teach us your ways. I love you girls. Oh, we love you too. We're so thrilled that you came on. See you next week. And I'll see you in about a month. Where can people find you? In their dad's bed, honey. Honestly, some guy was like, why'd you wear hijab? Why'd you have to wear that stupid cloth on your head?

I was like, cause your dad loves it, honey. He asked me all the time to send him pictures of my hijabs. Okay, honey. And then I blocked him. I do, I love bringing in people's moms and dads and stuff like that. Honestly, they're like, who do you think you are doing comedy? I'm like, ask your dad, isn't it? He love it. He love it.

Honestly, I love it. I also get, sorry, I'm just going to say this last time. I keep on getting these likes from geezers. Yeah. You know, like, yeah, my name's Toru. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just gonna say this last time. Yeah, I keep on getting these likes from geezers Yeah, you know like yeah, my name's tory. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I work on a building site that kind of shit Yeah, I make lifts or whatever the fuck I swear to God and I'm like, are you pranking me and I'm scared in I'm like, have you seen the film get out? pranking me and I'm scared in it. I'm like, have you seen the film Get Out? I'm like, is this Get Out? You're going to call me to a house in Kent?

And then like fucking and then that's the last. Oh, my God. Maybe they'll like program me to do comedy and they take all my money or some shit. Do you know what I'm saying? I'm telling I'm like, listen, Terry, don't play with me, Terry. I'm telling these proper geezers, brav, all these in their London, like what's it called England Football Club or Liverpool or Chelsea or whatever. In their t-shirts and they were like, you're right darling. I'm like, I was, but you're scaring me Terry. I get some mad ones brav.

And then the 60 year old men that are like, hell, hello. And they write like, halo. I'm like, what the fuck? Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello.

Hello. Hello. Fatima. I'm like, come on, man, you're Arab, you know that's not my name. Like come on bro. I'm just blocking people all the time. Oh my god. Sorry about that. Yeah. Sorry. You were kicking me out. I was trying to get rid of you. Yeah. No, you're the best. We want you to stay forever if you could. But I want people to find you because they're going to want to find you wherever they find you. So I'm on Instagram and TikTok and all the other social medias and it's just Fatima.

Fatima. Hello. It's Halo Fatima underscore. I'll sue your ass. And then the nail painting emoji. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're just on all the platforms under Fatiha El Ghori. Yeah, amazing.

And please, will you tell us about your book? Yes, after all that swearing and sexualation. It's not even a word, but I made it up because I've written a book actually. So I can... You've written whatever words you want. You're an author. That's fucking cool. That's really cool.

Thank you, brah. Thank you. It's a teen book, pre-teen book, and it's about a girl that starts wearing hijab and her journey in that, but there's lots of fun to it. It's called Perks of My Hijab. And she does all these things, you know, like she doesn't have to iron her uniform because you cannot see it, honey honey you know what I mean? I hide her chocolates underneath there has her air pods on.

And of course you are on the current series of Taskmaster. Yes. And I came to watch the live recording of the last two episodes. It was so funny and you are so so funny. The way you played it is so distinctive and hilarious. It was amazing. She's so kind. I don't know what to say when people are kind. I'm just like, okay. Thank you. I'll sue you.

Thank you. You're so good. Did you enjoy it? I loved it. It was fun. It's such a good experience. Like, and they were all really nice. You do feel like you're a bit of a family on there. Yeah, it's really nice. They're also like special. And we have a WhatsApp group and we're always like messaging each other. The content, just the five of us. Yeah, it's really nice.

Yeah, it was just great. And we obviously you don't know who's on it with you until you turn up to like the team tasks and stuff. And yeah, so that was fun. Oh, they're all nice. So it's a big mix of people as well. Like then we're not all comedians. You've got like an actor.

Yeah. So you've got like Jason Manzoukis, Matthew Baten, Stevie Martin, me and Rosie Ramsey. That's so good. It's such a good group. And they're so funny together on stage. It's great. I think it's going to be one of the best best seasons of all time. All right. OK, cool. OK, bye. All right. Well, thank you so much to my Lord and Savior.

The new leader of single ages in your area. Fatiha El-Ghoray. Clap over the head like a seal! Do seals do that? I don't know why, because I think you're moving your hands like that. Oh yeah! I guess seals do this! Well, well, well. We love Fatia.

Yeah, I feel moved. Like, if Fatia started a cult, I would join it. Oh, no one doubts that, Amy. Even if Fattier doesn't start a cult, I'm joining it. I'm joining anything. I think you're joining a cult within the next year, regardless of who starts it. I'm having to pull you out of a cult sometimes. Yeah, I can feel that in me. Yeah, you've got cult follower energy.

Yeah. Cult's just around the corner for me. Yeah. A cult has always felt just around the corner for me, weirdly. Actually, I was talking to some friends recently and we said that my type of man is a cult leader. Yes. Yeah, that's bad. Oh really, really bad. You should change that.

Superficial charm, the performer element, the center of attention. Once haderation. Once haderation. Yeah. Doesn't give anything back. Fucked up. Do you think that's still your type? Yeah.

Okay, okay. Okay. Maybe, maybe you're the only person that like should join Scientology for your mental health. Like just so you have a leader and then you can find like just like a nice guy on the side. Put Fati as my leader now. Okay, great. Yeah, Fati would be a great leader. I think that's it.

Put all your cold energy into Fati. Okay. I think she'll get really pissed off pretty soon about that. I think she'll be so annoyed with me so quickly. I love her. I love chatting to her. I love seeing her. She's a sweetheart. And cool. Yeah. Just the leader of my dreams, really. It was just really interesting.

I was so interested in hearing about, like, the Muslim apps. Yeah. And how... Yeah, I didn't know anything about them. Well, no. And nor should we. We should be spying on them. We're not invited to. It's not how it's meant. It's as if you're like, oh yeah, I'm on the app. I'm on the Muslim app circuit as well. It's like the spread of mind field. Yeah, bambolins. I'm not getting any matches at all on that one, which is weird.

But yeah, really, that was so interesting. It wasn't what I expected it to be. I like when she said at the end to, to like the young women out there and was like, look, this isn't about compromising. It's about standards. Yeah, compromise on where they're putting their shoes, but don't compromise on honesty and loyalty. And oh, right. I'm going to go out and get a tattoo of Fattia. Okay. Are you coming? I'm going to go out and get a tattoo of Fattier. OK.

Are you coming? I love Fattier. I'm all in, you know me. If I'm in, I'm in. Yeah, but I think the problem is, I think if you start this, every guest, you're going to end up, you're going to be covered by the end of the series. You're going to be covered in tattoos. Yeah. And then it's going to be rude to people you don't get tattooed.

And I'm going to have to do all the guests backdated. Yeah. And then I'd feel bad on my family if I didn't have their names. And just like all my childhood friends and pets and colleagues, you know, audience members, because they've really helped along the way. You know, teachers, neighbors. People that listen to single ladies. People that listen.

Our friends that listen. Yeah. Oh, fuck. All right, our friends that listen. Yeah. Oh fuck. Alright, we'll do it. God, I really want a Fatiya tattoo. Everybody check out Fatiya El Ghori on Instagram, around the place and with her new book. Yeah, she's an author. The Perks of My Hijab. Also, currently smashing Taskmaster.

So, just on the up. Currently smashing Taskmaster, an author and a cult leader. And she's suing a lot of people. And suing people left, right and centre. I'm sure I'll be next. And I will happily see you all in court. Copyright face on your arm. Time to check on the skies. It's another sunny day in Calgary. Forecast calls for high levels of economic activity.

Late afternoon we've got a burst of potential in a place ranked North America's most livable city. Tomorrow, blue sky thinking in the blue sky city should hold steady, and the outlook remains optimistic throughout the week. So come grab your dreams and enjoy watching them take hold. It's possible in Calgary, the blue sky city. For the full economic forecast, visit calgaryeconomicdevelopment.com.

Hello, me again, Amy Gladhill, but this time I'm with... Not Harriet Kemsley. Whoa! WT, fuck! What's going on? I'm with bloody Ian Smith. Offer to Northern News podcast. Yes, a podcast that's not about the news.

Don't worry, single ladies. No, it's not about the news. It's not about being single. It's about the North, and all of our stories are about couples. That is not the truth Ian. Not technically true. It's weird stuff, it's funny stuff that's going on up North that we're reporting back

on. Things like, pure evil blackbird named Derek terrorising Yorkshire village and attacking children. Woman in tears after spotting spitting image of dead dog in Bathmat. And we've got special guests. We're talking about people like Phil Wang, Jessica Nappet, Ed Campbell and Ross Noble who joined us in the studio. Woohoo! Yeah!

So that's Northern News starting next Thursday, the 1st of May and then every Thursday after that. Join us!