SleepyCabin - SleepyCast 06 - [The Lion, the Witch and the Wilhelm Scream]

Episode Date: October 25, 2014

IT'S SLEEPYCAST EPISODE 6 shhhh...we're relaxing tonight. Grab a beer and shhhhh... *CUE WILHELM SCREAM* sleepycabin.com/audio/sleepycast-06/ (Download Wilhelm there!) This episode starring: Stamper (www.youtube.com/StamperTV) Psychicpebbles (www.youtube.com/Psychicpebbles) Oney (www.youtube.com/OneyNG) JohnnyUtah (http://johnnyutah.newgrounds.com) +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Yo, we're on Patreon if you wanna throw us a buck! http://www.patreon.com/SleepyCabin +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ SleepyCabin Official Site! http://www.sleepycabin.com SleepyCabin on YouTube! http://www.youtube.com/SleepyCabin Stay tuned on Facebook! https://www.facebook.com/SleepyCabin ...or Twitter! https://twitter.com/sleepycabin +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ We're on iTunes, too! Search for SleepyCabin!

There is a world as tangible as our own, impossible to see yet unavoidable to sense. A world enveloped by a seemingly unending ocean of forests. Buried deep in that forest, tucked away neatly within a blanket of twilight, lies a quaint little cabin. And in that cabin... There's a bunch of guys. He's a bunch bullshitter. Uh, welcome to the Sleepy Cabin annual podcast. Brought to you by water. Appricates don't happen. That's why it's good.

Yes They have water They peeed on them It's called blood They drink blood They're in 78% water They bathe in each other's blood It accumulates in puddles

They're in 98.6 It accumulates in tears That they drink Brought to you by that frothy mixture Of blood and goat milk That the savages drink in Africa No Also called Mountain Dew

That's right Mountain Dew sponsored Brought to you by Mountain Dew Code Red frothy goat milk Brought to be Coca-Cola. They sponsored slaves in China. Brought to you by those things, Africans,

those pointy things Africans wear on their dicks. Spears? Or what they're called. Fangs? No, they're like little pointy cones, but they stick out really strong. That'd be pretty cool, like, body mod if you got two little fangs and put her on the under side of your dick. Brought to you by the form chip lady. We're sorry.

When you push it into the girl and pull it back out, it hurts. This podcast is brought to you by Papa Johns. I don't like Papa Johns. It stinks. Is this going to be the whole podcast? Just fake sponsors. Brat to you. This podcast brought to you by

Bookshelf. We hold shit so you don't have to. This podcast brought to you by my stinky finger. It holds shit so you don't have to. This podcast is brought to you by Al Qaeda. Don't to America. No, you can't do it.

That's too much Al-Qaeda jokes. This podcast exists. This podcast is brought to by Ghostbusters 3, which is going to be really unfunny, because it's going to be filled with... Because Dan Aykwood's running, yeah, I said it. Dan Aykwood's a fucking creep. Did you write it? Look it up.

Did he write it? Probably, he's a fucking creep, dude. It's being made by the people who made bridesmaids, and it's gonna have that big fat one, and she's gonna make fat jokes. Wait, bridesmaids. Jimmy, this is a... People kept telling me to watch that.

It's, uh, I don't know her name. I heard it was kind of gay. But she sucks, and everybody thinks she's funny. You sucks this pig. I know. Should we just start this again? All right. So since Corey's not here, let's talk about Corey for a little bit.

All right. Stubby... I was going to say, we didn't even really introduce ourselves. Okay, uh, welcome to Sleepy Cast. This is Chris and Jeff and Stamper and Zach. We should... Good enough. Hold on.

That was the lazy as... Welcome to SleepyCats. This is Chris, Jeff. Stabber. Tell you. I'm sorry. Welcome to Sleepycast, your weekly source of ugly freaks making you laugh. Get off the stage, faggars!

Okay, well, we got a heckler in here, obviously. I don't know how he got in. I'm Zach. I'm Stamper, TV. I'm dot org. I'm Chris. My name's Jeff and I also go by Johnny Utah

also can't hear your character in the movie Point Break I don't live in Utah, thank you. That's all, it's all a lie. Look at point break. I don't like people at every fucking month on Xbox some guys like,

are you a Mormon? No. Oh, because of Utah. Yeah. Yeah. What else do they do in Utah? I don't fucking know. Call yourself Johnny Nice Mountains.

Johnny Nice Mountains. Johnny. or Johnny a weird sexual idea Johnny oh yeah like you gonna get her Johnny Johnny got big clump tits Johnny mountains sounds like a porth store name well my name is Johnny and I have big titty that works go on Zach tell us what what's another little book yours I have your deepest darkest secrets this is actually your book Chris which looks identical is my diary today which is today me gay me sock penis ha ha ha all those stamp are coming me go

now How are you... Why did you write that down? How are you even reading that? I wrote that in, like, my own symbols. Yeah, it's your real language here. How did you know my language? It shows your face with a dick coming into it, and the stampro walking in, and you putting the book away.

How are you reading that? I'm a savant. Okay. Yeah, an idiot savant. No, a cool one with a big dick and a cool, fast car. Count these toothpicks, bitch. A big fast dick, fast car savant? Big fast dick car.

Okay. Anyways. Let's talk about dead animals. Okay. All right. Did you ever, obviously, we're going to sound like assholes, but you know, kids are young, they don't really have a concept of life and death. Did you ever do anything when you were younger, where you hurt an animal, like maybe an insect?

Here we go. You ready? Yeah. I didn't do it, but you want to hear a sad story? Yeah. One time after school, I was waiting to get picked up, and my friend Kevin was standing around, and he saw a little caterpillar underground, and he was like, hey, watch this. And he picked it up, then he got a pencil, and he poked out the caterpillar's eye with it.

And I felt really, really, really sad. He poked out his eye. He poked out his eye. That's terrible. Yeah, I know. It wasn't fun. Sorry, I'm after bummed at the podcast already, but it did happen. You know what? I'm going to beep out his name, too. Oh, he's not going to care. Kevin, you're a fucking monster. Yeah, it was, no, he's the nice guy now, but that was, like, the saddest thing I ever saw.

The end. I shot a Seagull once. I felt really horrible about that. He shot a Seagull? Seagulls are worthless, though. Yeah, we had this, um, this is, I don't even know if you could do it anymore, but we used to be able to go to Walmart Martin, buy, um... Like, guns? Like, uh, like, uh, BB guns?

You could still do that, yeah, you can still, you can buy pellet guns, but like the ones that you put the cartridge, the, the, the CO2 cartridge in that, like, really, like, you could really do damage with it. Dude, you could buy shotguns, not shotguns, but you could buy, like, actual guns at Walmart. We had, man, we got into so much fucking trouble with that gun. There was three times that we got in the, because it looked real, first of all. The first time we got into trouble with is, because I was in the car with my, uh,

my friend Polo, and he's sitting in the passenger seat. And there's a minivan in front of us and there's like these two great school kids in the back window like making fun of us and he's like man fuck those bitches and I was like dude they're just kids Yeah he's like no fuck them and then he pulls a gun out And then he's like he's like pointed at him

And then they went ape shit You could see him silently going nuts in the car right And then I get up and he's like ah it was so funny And then I get up to the light And then the van like stopped all the way behind me right Yeah and then I went over to Polo's house It turns out that she um She held back there to get my license plate.

And then my dad called my cell phone and he's like, son, get home right fucking now. And I was like, what? And then me and Paula went back to my dad's house and there was cops all over the place. Like several? Yeah, and then they interviewed us separately and they interviewed him first. And then he came out and he was like, don't tell him fucking anything. And I was like, yeah, man, I got your back.

And then I went in there and I was like, it's a fake gun. We got it at Walmart and we already got rid of it Actually that was the last story That was when I actually disposed of it In a pond like I was a fucking Like you just killed somebody? Yeah

I was like I gotta get rid of this thing It's a toy gun from fucking Walmart But as far as the animal story goes Like again we were sitting in the car It was always in my car And it's like hey See if you can't shoot that seagull And I was like okay

And then I just did it And it got him right through the neck And he was like Eh! And then he just He plopped over like a bag of shit I felt so fucking horrible. I got out of my car and I went over to the Seagull and I picked him up.

I picked up his lifeless little body and it's so weird because their necks in real life are only like two inches long. Well, not when they're dead. But when I picked up his body, his head dangled and his neck stretched out like a spaghetti noodle. His neck was like a foot long. And then I ran to the veterinarian. I was like, fix the bird

And the whole time his head was Like flopping like a slinky And then I passed it over to the vet And the vet was like, what do you want me to do with this? I was like, I don't know, can you fix it? She's like, it's dead. I'll see what I could do And I know that she just took it

To the back and threw it in the trash But I felt so horrible after doing that. He's got a trash can just like being It was like dangling around That gun was so fucking powerful though The third of those stories was I was with my friend It's not like it fucking matters

But he was like give me that He got the gun and then he pointed As we were driving by he pointed at the back of an SUV And he shot the window This is the same guy? No this is a different guy This is Antoine Okay

So he pointed at the back of the SUV And he cracked off one shot And the window turned to It just like crumbled I've never seen anything like that before This is a property car or just a park car? No just a parked car It didn't pop a little hole in it

The entire thing exploded Into like powder Into powder Yeah the whole back window Broke into little chunks Like no bigger than I want to say like grains and rice That's what it looked like

But the whole thing just crumbled into I guess it's like a preventative measure So if you wreck your car So it's a piece of glass Yeah so if you bust a window And break into a car Like for the most part you can touch the glass Because it crumbles

They're not like window shards That's not like a window glass Or door glass or something Whenever you see videos online of people like smashing into the windows that's always what happens always turns into like little individual grain yeah like little pieces of it was so weird it was like I would love

to see a slow motion of like the window smashing ruin that guy's fucking day wow Chris what about you those guns have to be illegal now dude I swear you could you could really do some damage you can buy real guns in Walwart you can real guns see this is in Virginia like in I don't know when like Colorado used to be able to go in there and get shotguns I'm pretty sure you could get rifles or something like

that now. You could run into, yeah, in the Midwest especially, you could run in there and pick up like a, you'd been 10 minutes, you could walk out of there with a gun. I got like a gun gun. Kill somebody, yeah, immediately. In Virginia, I think they just sold the, um, I don't know, they're called like air guns or something. Airsoft, right? It's not air soft because air soft is a, like, pellets. Yeah, but these are like metal BBs that are like shot out. So it's a high-parbby-good basically. Yeah, a CO2 cartridge. They were like insanely powerful. Like, I still, that decided that seagull plopping over is burned into my mind. So you'll like haunts you.

Chris, did you have any, you have any stories? I told you about the caterpillar, but you know... Oh, sorry, sorry. No, but I had another story with the same guy. I used to go over to his house. But one time, he found, like, a bunch of daddy long-leg spiders. They're a little tiny ball-bodied spiders. Yeah, but I remember he used to bring me over and be like, watch this.

He'd, like, pick off all their legs and put the little balls on the table all next to each other. And they just sit there and scriming and solitaire. They're just sitting, like, they're just little balls now. That's like Decaptain and you're afraid to the whole thing in the head next to somebody else's head, like, you know, making... That would be like me cutting off your head, but your head stayed alive and you couldn't do anything.

Even though these are insects, I still feel like this is worse than what I did. What did you do, Jeff? Yeah. I didn't do that, by the way, but you're going. I'm going to clarify something real quick because I was just thinking, um, when I went inside and dimed on my friend,

I know people are like, oh, you fucking, you dimed on your friend. Whatever, man. That lady had his dead to right. She was like, there was a gun and there was like three witnesses. So I went in there and told her flat out. It was a toy of fake gun.

Well, I'm sure they thought it was a real gun. You were throwing the kids. You probably would have got a lot of trouble. Because I know he probably went in there, and he was probably like, I don't know what the fuck you guys are talking about. I'm going to keep my mouth shut. But this is going to get me to go to fucking trouble. I cleared the air really quick.

Those guys were out of there in 10 minutes. I was like, I didn't tell them shit, man. We're good. Jeff, what horrible shit did you do? I've killed one animal in my life, and I feel justified. And even, dare I say, a hero. What happened? You were a hero.

It was a woodpecker terrorizing my parents' house. This doesn't sound like something that would terrorize. It was destroying my parents' house. Oh, yeah. I was putting holes everywhere. It was running around like, ha ha ha. I didn't want to...

We hoped it would just go away, but after weeks of this, I eventually just had to pull out the BB gun, and I nailed that little fucker right in its head, right between the eyes. Sorry, I had one more story. I just remember. No.

Sorry. They fucking trash your property, though. I've got a good story. And they're annoying as fuck. Buh! Yeah, no, yeah, and they're loud, and, uh, yeah. The fucking woodpeckers. There was just no other option.

It was causing, like, hundreds of dollars. They're known for pissing people off. Okay, but sorry, another good story is one time when I was younger, I was at my mom and dad's house, and there was a rat that kept eating out of their bird feeder, and the way our kitchen, like, it overlooks the bird feeder, so it's like a big-ass window, bird feeder, and there was always this rat

who would always climb up it and start gnawing out of it. One time my dad, like, stuck his head out of the window, started, like, shaking his fist at the rat and being like, get off of it, and the rat. They shook his fist at the right. I swear to God, and the rat would look at him and be like, and they just keep on eating the bird feeder, right? So my mom was like, she called her brother Jimmy

And he came over with a shotgun Like which was kind of overkill I think of it but he came over with a shotgun And we had all my little cousins Me, my mom and dad and I'm all her uncle's aunts Just looking at the window at this rat eating of a bird feeder Well my uncle Jimmy like snuck up on it with the shotgun And he pulled the trigger and there was just like a wave of blood

It erupted onto the windscreen and everyone screamed And that was it I think blasting a fucking rat with his shotgun's a little extreme No I know but it was really funny You can hit it with a pillow in the eyes I don't know if it was some kind of rifle but You could throw a rock. It was a big old...

It was a big old gun, and it fucking exploded. I remember when I was a kid, I had a BB gun. No, he did that. No, that's what I'm saying. The kitchen window overlooked like the bird feeder outside. I had a BB gun that I was a kid with time. I was probably 11 or 12. Uh-huh.

And I love animals, but for some reason I saw Frog one time, and I just wanted to see what happened. I shot with a BB gun, and I thought it would die. It's one of those things where it's not right, but your kid used to kind of want to see how it would react. Yeah. And it did die. And I was like, fuck, and I felt the voice because it started hopping around.

Oh. Long story short, it took about 70-80 shots for me to kill it. It did not take two or three. And I kept him to go back and get more babies and reload it. I was going to go and get more beamed down. Why did you just step on it? I'm not going to step because did I step on it. Well, you're just shooting it with tiny fucking bees.

What else are we going to do? Kick it into the ditch and move on. Give my uncle shotgun and a fucking blast this frog in the face. Oh my gosh. Anyways, that still makes me sad to think about this until day. Tell me, what's your question? Have you guys ever hit an animal with your car accidentally? What time I hit a monkey?

Whoa. No, like something that's trying to. True. A true story. No. What do you think it's not true? You think I didn't hit a chimpanzee on the way to Wawa? It's sort of screaming and I kept driving. Oh, right next to the monkey crossing side? Yeah, yeah. It's a huge problem. I feel like I have hit an animal with my car before.

Nothing big enough to worry about. I don't know. I've run over dead animals before. I was in the car with my uncle once and we hit an owl, and I still remember the terrified look on the owl's face when, because he flew right into the windshield and just exploded. Oh, no. You killed the mask got to the website. He just flew straight at the window. and last thing I saw it was his little owl face crushing in slow motion and then it was just feathers and a big smear on the window

I'll tell you something terrifying though I saw because I kind of grew up in the country um yes and these dude to pick up truck he hit a deer head on in front of my house at night and we went out there and it was just this pickup chuck in the middle of the road with this lights on and this deer with it wasn't even dead it had all four legs were broken

and it was flailing around all four broken legs flailing in every direction and I was like freaking the fuck out I'm like This is like, this is like... Nightmare. Yeah, this is a nightmarish, like, silent hill game before that came to exist. Yeah, that's the first thing I thought of. Like, that's what you come up on in the fog in Silent Hill.

You just see arms flailing first. It was just this is horrible, like, single light on this thing in the dark flailing around, but it, uh... It died, but the funniest part was, before anybody even had a chance to pull it off the road, some other dude and another pickup truck came by, and he's just like, hey, you guys were going to eat that? You guys want that? Well, it's still alive? Dude was dead. It was dead. And everybody's like, no, you can have it.

And he just grabbed it and fit through it in the back and drove off. Cool. I mean, I guess it was good. I guess the meat was good. Saved him a day of sitting in the woods. He probably had a shitty day hunting. He came back and he was like, oh. I mean, it wasn't like that abnormal, but it was just kind of funny.

It was just how casual it was. It's actually pretty cool that he did that instead of just letting it sit there and rot. Yeah. Yeah, so. And you could have like a cool deer skull to hang on the wall. It was only half a tragedy, I guess. Let's like a cliche. You're going to eat that joke?

You gonna eat that? Broken legs flannel all around. What if he was like, you gonna blow that? You were like, nah man, help yourself. And he was like, oh, thank you. He ran over. And the deer is still alive flopping. What if you breathe the life into the deer by doing that like in the green mow?

Oh, and the deer got up and he was like, thank you, my son. It's like, that was good. God damn. Chris, you know what a frog it is? A frog it? Yeah, it's a type of, it's like it's not a frog. It's basically this Midwestern animal It's like a rabbit, but it looks kind of weird

Okay, I think I've seen one of these Let me guess it's brownish gray Bage. Yeah, beige Okay Anyways, these things were, you know, hopping around all over the yard Mm-hmm One day my dad gets, my old man gets furious What are all these ancient frog

It's doing all over the place? These screams, I say, Old man, calm down. You listen to me! You know, he hits me, I'm freaking out. He grabs a mallet, a huge hammer. Like a Gallagher mallet? Yeah, sir, smashing these.

He's everywhere. My neighbor comes out and says... Poking up out of a gopher holes. Yeah, smashing them. Their heads are exploding. My dad, you know, the mallet's probably 10 feet big. Anyways, he smashes all these. Cooks and fries him the next day.

Didn't you say the dudes, do your neighbor came out? Oh, yeah, he came out too, and he was like, nice job. They smashed him. But I was like, thanks. Okay. Yeah. Did he make froggot soup? That's good.

No, he was allergic to it. He would have died. Oh, my dad? Oh, yeah. My dad hated the frog soup. Everyone hated the froggots. So he made this soup that no one ate? Yeah, exactly.

We had the slogan, Frogot soup was for faggot soup. It didn't make any sense, but it was catchy up with a set. But, Zach, you know, like, what happens when you eat frogate soup? You have ugly kids. It taints your sperm and makes... That's true. Are you sure?

You sure you're not lying? You have to eat it, at least like... The ugly never ate the frogate soup, but you think he's so ugly would cancel out and have a handsome kid? You know how I know you're lying? Because you're ugly. Because you can't make soup with froggets. You can only make stew with froggots.

Fine, it was a frogate stew. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I would never, though. I'm not brave enough because it does have a liver like a blowfish where it's like you have, if you cut the wrong part inside, it poisons like the whole thing. It throws the whole thing off. There's a poison sack inside.

That's why you have to pee on the bodies if you smash where else. Yeah. No, the pee, yeah, it's funny enough. I always hate seeing guys pee on them. Pea on these dead frogs. I heard that if you wear gloves while you're handling a frog it, it like disrespects you and does a little war cry. It's true. You have to skin their front legs.

You could eat their back legs with the skin on, but you have to skin their front legs because they're like a poison dark frogs. Yeah. They have their little blue front legs. They have those little war packets with swell up with poison. When you capture, you have to put your finger in their ass to stun them if you want to skin them. You know what I mean? They get frozen in the feet like a cat. Then you can skin them.

Twitle your finger around. If you bend your finger down, their mouths open. Yeah, it's like a puppet. Then you put in your wiener. You could fuck them. I'd never stick my dick in a frog it, though. Me neither. They're biters.

They're like teenage girls with braces. Nobody said that you had to put it in their mouth. They bite butt, like... Oh, you go in through their butt and your dick comes out of their mouth, and then they bite your own on it. Yeah, you do double team, yeah. They've got, like, those gross little gums that don't really hurt, so you're fine. Yeah, the fact that they have no teeth makes it a lot easier to fuck their mouths while they scream.

You got to be careful not to get poisoned, though. Yeah, because he tries to reach up and grab your dick with his little poison. You got to smack it away. You got to say, no, stop. Where was this story going? I just wanted to say my dad used to smash these frogs every day. Okay. He used to go frog and smash every day.

Frogots smash every day. Frogots smashing. Where you go with darling? Don't worry about it, honey. So we'd say every morning, every day or that way it looked up. He didn't even have a job. That's what he did. But I was, I destroyed all our badminton rackets hitting them.

Wait, what? I like badminton. Badminton was fun. Badminton was fun. Yeah. That was destroyed the rackets. That's a really bad way kind of. My dad would come up to me, but like, boy.

Can't pay badminton now. I'm like, I'm sorry. Come all your parents sound like that. I don't know. Boy? Boy? No kill a frog. Shit, boy.

Do you guys have any good pissing the bed stories? Do you have any good alive animal stories? I saw a live animal. I saw a deer once. It was beautiful, majestic, eating parries. Yeah, you fucked it. In a field. Baby deer. I don't know.

Whenever I see an animal, I just, you know... If you were writing a letter to a deer, how'd you started? Oh, shut up. Oh, shut the fuck up. Don't be mad. What was your question, Zach? You said... Yeah, when I was seven years old, probably eight.

You know, I'm not going to make the age lower so I can make myself feel better. think it's funny how people remember like when I was six years old, blah, whoa. I wasn't six. All my memories were hazy until I was eight. You'll know why I ever heard this one. I don't remember shit.

You'll know why I read this one. When I was seven or eight, I had a birthday party and I had a bug bed and I had a bunch of Pepsi. My friend slept on the bottom bug and the next morning, turns out, I pissed off my friends on the top bunk and I'm not joking, it dribbled down.

And my friend woke up and said he felt some splash in his face and he woke up. And it was my pee. That is a true story, by the way. I never lived that down. Not your friend anymore I have something nearly Did it come back over to your house?

Maybe more embarrassing No Because I peed on him dude He woke up with pee in his face Like he was in a cave He was never your friend anymore No because I peed on him Did you apologize?

Sorry for peat on you He said I don't want to hear it Star for pain on you Your pee went through your address I pissed so much It soaked through the top layer of the bed It dripped down onto this guy's face I bet at the time though

He was like How was he sleeping for your wiener To be lined up with his face What are you talking about? It would see through the mattress and would spread out evenly and it would start raining down like a square. Yeah, he felt some touch his face and he was like, oh, and he woke up and it was, yeah. So is that a birthday, he said?

It was my birthday. You had some cake, though, right? Yeah, yeah, the guy, yeah, the other guy felt some doo-doo splinter on his face, too. He wasn't happy with that. No, but if you had some cake, then the guy you peed on would have some, like, cakey pee-pee. Yeah. Cake pee cake. Your pee tastes like birthday cake.

So he was like, yes. I put a candle as well after I peed inside of him, but he was like, thank you. And I blew it out. You put a little candle in his pee hole? Yeah. You blew it out. You could have easily played that off and said that's the only thing you wanted for your birthday. You could have leaned down and said, gotcha!

Like it was a prank that you peed on him. And he'd be like, why have I come to pee? I'd be like, because you don't get it. Oh, you're not cool enough to get it. I'll tell you my worst birthday memory. I was a little kid, I guess I was like, I wasn't even, I don't know, I was like six or seven. And I got, I got like an television or pong or something as a kid. And my parents invited, you know, all these kids over from school and down the street.

and the one girl down the street, she was at the party, and we played Pong, and she beat me, and then I threw a temperate bathroom, and I ran out of the room. That's more embarrassing? I think so. Did you kiss her? Because I should have fucking beat her at Pong. It's a man's game.

That's hilarious. She kicked my ass out. Little tiny Jeff. Yeah, I was like, eh! I ran out of it. I love when you're a kid, how trivial your fucking problems are. Are you going to your robe and punch your pillows? Boom!

Anyway, Let's talk about... What would you do in the apocalypse? If the world ended, what would you do? I would run from bad man, hide in basement, and... I would build a thunder dome, first of all. You'd do what? You guys know the Thunderdome?

Oh, from Mad Max? Yeah. It's a big metal cage with weapons on the side, and two men enter. One man leaves. That's the rule. And would you be the guy who enters, would you be the guy who looks over it?

Oh, I'd run it. I'd run the thing. Jefferson on top of it, you know. Yeah, I'd just, you know, I'd be like the promoter. Let's suppose you're the leader of the free world, Jeff. Yeah. Who do you put against each other? You can pick anybody you want to. In the Thunderdome?

Yeah, anybody in the world. Adam Sandler versus... Adam Carolla, two Adams fight. They stayed up. I don't know. Finally, after all these years of tension. You really didn't pause on Adam Sandler. You just...

I just... I've just... filled out of your mouth, like sweet, sinful molasses. I would give the other guy a few extra chainsaws on his side of the Thunderdome. Jeff was just going by alphabetical order. I put Rob Schneider with Jenny McCarthy so you can get rid of the anti-vaxxers together, kill each other. Just worse people. The Rob Schneider?

You think Schnobs Schneider's the worst person in the world? They have the worst person in the world. You really believe Rob Schneider's the worst person in the world? I know for a fact of someone at there right now who's like cutting off a kid's head and fucking the neck all. Did that person start Dus Bigelow 2? Thought so. Oh my God. Prove me wrong.

I like Rob Schneider. Fuck Rob Schneider. He's completely harmless. You know, he's only guilty as being the most successful, worthless coattel rider in the world. He's basically Coat Till rid Sandler into his billion dollars to sense. Yeah, but he always plays like weird foreign creepy guy, like weird stereotype. It's like, I have ended up, you know. They make cameos in each other's movies all the time.

I wouldn't say that he's like co-tail. pretty one-way street. Rob Schindler pretty much makes all the cameos of the Salyers movies. I can't about you see Adam Salyler. Why are we talking about Rob? Is he a friend of yours? Who gives you shit? I like Rob, all right?

Oh, really? You don't like Rob at all? You said that if Rob was at a... You said if Rob Schneider was at a party, he'd be the one guy you would not talk to. Right now, people are raising an eyebrow at you, Zach, because it's all pro-Hitler this, and I love Hitler that, and fuck Rob Schneider. He's the worst person. I don't love Hitler.

I think he's a cool guy. There's a difference. Oh, shit. Isn't Rob Schneider Jewish? let's move on let's move on he's one of those Jews who looks like a Jew too he's one of those fucking big dirty Jews

with a huge fucking yeah he's got that gross Jew hair and my name is Zach Hato Mike Stamper fuck pussy yo bitch stop that's slander and I don't appreciate Jesse Pinkman too

here's the end yeah how's Jesse Pigman Betts? Mr. White Jesse Pinkett Let's smoke marijuana. That was the weirdest Jesse Pinkman I ever heard. Jesse Bikman, Bits.

He doesn't say bitch, he says, bitch. It's like B, T, C, Batch. Batch. Batch. Jesse. Jesse. Tia what a cook. Kuck him,

Kippa Gah, Gah, Gai. Uh, Stamper, tell me what you thought of the last episode of Breaking Bad. Ah, whatever. Yeah, okay, so next topic. Next topic. What is something underrated that you guys have seen, that you think I should share with the audience here. Underage girls.

I feel like there's so many things that... Underage girls get enough credit. They are underrated. Yeah, from some, you know, questionable people. Like, not everyone's into them. You never saw a bottle of them and say, hey, Underage Girls, we saw that. Olives and popping cherries, I guess, right? In a world where underage girls were being plentiful and...

Accessible? For everyone? Despite your social class? Unbaraka. Well, I got an idea. Let's write a story on the fly, and I don't know, maybe somebody can animate it. Zach, you start with a sentence, I'll continue it, and then we'll do a round robin until the story's over. Go.

But may I look to the toilet bowl. And he saw a reflection of his wife. He turned to her, and he said, Wife, I see you in here. What is this? And then, because she wasn't a reflection, it was her actual head, and she just went, Glob, glove, glove, glove. As he said, that makes me fucking horny.

And then he dipped his wiener in the toilet water right into the reflection of her mouth. When he pulled out his wiener, her mouth was attached and he spun it around really fast. The head? Yeah, it was like... It was like...

Around his wiener. The head. Around his wiener. All right, well then he had to spend the next three hours cleaning his bathroom because the blood went in a perfect circle from her neck around the entire bathroom, wall ceiling, and floor. Five years later, the man still lived with her head on his penis attached forever.

But he was a millionaire, because after the whole blood incident, an art critic walked in, and he was like, I like what you've done with the place, and bought just his bathroom, sectioned it off and put it in an art gallery in New York, sold for millions and millions. He used the money to buy a broomstick, which he put his wife's head on, and she lived again. Hold on. Keep going. He carried her around to sign autographs at Comic Con. And then when he was done with her, he stuck her in a...

Comic-Con, New York. To scare away little kids on their way to school. One of the little kids he scared away, though, gave him the fuck-me-ey-ey-ey-ey-y-ey-ha. You and your fucking kids in their fuck-me-ey-ey-ey-was. He was in a committed relationship, so he pointed the broom out of the kid with the website on top. Have I said before the podcast? I said, give me a plug-me-ey-ey-ey-old? You say that a lot, Zach.

that out of all podcasts generally. You say that in every podcast. It's true, they do. Stamper, what would you do if you were changing a baby's diaper and he was giving you the fuck-me-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey-was giving you the fuck-me-ey-ey-ey-ey-law. Listen, Samper, I'd bring it because it's an epidemic of these kids going around to give you the guy all these adults, fuck-me-ey-ey-ey-ad-ad-adults? They don't know what to do.

They just get confused. It happens to me daily. All right, so... I'm mad enough to walk away. If a baby was giving you fuck-me-ey-ey-yes, would you fuck it or make it or go on a... I'm gonna disappoint her. That's why you panic in public because you're looking at these kids

and all these skits old voices. Every way I look, these kids are saying, fuck me, fuck me, I say, no, you know. They bite their lips

and give you the fuck me eyes. That's why our house has a blue dot. What? Watchdog.com is a huge fucking red dot. What are you talking about? Oh, I know.

Sorry, yeah, that thing. The pentapal website called crystal deal.com. The biggest pedophile organization on the earth. He's like,

I, No, my- I find pedophiles because I'm one of them. I infiltrate. My room is a green dot. Your room's all red dots. What? Your pedophile headquarters. No, my room is a green dot and you're all red dots.

I mean, Corey is a black dot. Green means like level one dangerous pedophile. No, it means safe. Moving on. They need a new TV show where it's like, you know where the plots are normally like to catch murderers, we have to get a murderer. It's like to catch pedophiles, we need to find a pedophile. What do you think like a pedophile?

It's sort of fucking kids. They're like... I think I know. They get their little moustaches going. Start combing over their hair. If I was going to find some kids, I would go here, and there's like Hans Zimmer music playing. Like, doon, dun, dun, don't do, do, do. This is where all the hottest kids are.

Just wait. Just wait. Whenever I think of pitfalls, I always think of them in, like, those 80 sweaters. Peatophile. 80 sweaters? No, those sweat. Like, whenever you see, like, a headshot of a pedophile, like, in prison or whatever, they always have, like, the comb over, the little stash.

And then they got big fat titty's in the sweater. They always kind of look like Ned's. Flanders, but with a thinner mustache. They've got like these 80 sweaters. You never see like a handsome ripped pedophile. It's just like really handsome and muscular and works out a lot and has a high protein diet. Yeah, he's like, hey, I'm a pedophile. There was just a, there was just a, yeah.

You never look at a picture of a pedophile and go, really? Yeah. That guy? Well, look at him. Look at dudes. It's always these sly looking like, you know they're just hiding in bushes. As we speak, they're in the bushes outside. There's the bushes right now.

Waiting for that. school with Baldering. You know, you know, you're the guy Brian Peppers, the fucking... Yeah? Yeah, he was a pedophile. Was he really, though? Yeah. Are you sure? Submody had he found his, like, criminal records. Objection! Conjecture! Just because he looks weird. No, he didn't look like a pedophile. He was a pedophile.

Like, his picture, that picture of him came from his arrest record, he'd be a pedophile. I think the storyline was... He fucked so many kids. He started fusing into them. That's why he looks weird. He started taking her DNA in. I think he, like, pinched a nurse's ass when he was just, like, dying and sick in the hospital. or something. It wasn't like this.

It didn't sound like... Yeah, all the peppers are going on pitchy asses. Yeah, I don't know. Dude, people are so impressionate. If there's a weird guy somewhere, they're like, you know, he's a pedophile, right? Most people wouldn't even think twice. And they just start saying it, too. Michael Jackson's a good example.

There was a Hollywood dude that just came out as a pedophile. Oh, the death for seventh heaven. Yeah. I've never seen that show, but I've seen him another song. Was it that show or was a different show? I think it was Seventh Heaven. He came out of the closet as a pedophile? Well, you know, like his what?

He went to therapy and confessed it. Yeah, the therapist. And his wife recorded, released it to TMZ. Oh, wow. What? Yeah, it's fucked up. What the hell's TMZ? It's fucked up of both of them because he fucked kids.

That's fucked up. He admitted it to her, and then she made him go to therapy, and then they recorded it him telling this shit again. Wait, he actually did it, or he? No, there's a big difference. Was he fucking kids or looking at naked? Here's what happened. He showed his red penis to kids, and they were like, okay.

So he wasn't fucking kids. He was just a weirdo when it came to kids. He pulled that. his penis Which doesn't make it right. He took a relative's little girl and put her hand on his dick. That was the worst to cut, but that's still pretty bad.

But then there was also the father from Beetlejuice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The guy from Ferris Bueller. Then once you look at him, you're like, of course he was a pedophile. Look at him. Just look at him. It's like, how did you do we not see this before? One of those really good directors

is a pedophile too. What's his name? The guy who did the pianist. Yeah, no, what's his name? Yeah, you know, see this movie, The Knife Gate, which is really not very good, but I watch it. Oh my god. You know what? The Ninth Gate was a great movie up until like the third act. Yeah.

In the last like 15 minutes, that movie totally derailed me. Yeah, it was pretty good up. I know that point. I liked it. It was an interesting mystery. Maybe in the last few minutes of directing, he was like, I'm really horny. And then he went off to find some kids and then left Johnny Depp all alone to finish the movie. What was his name again?

I know what you're talking about. There's tons of pedophiles in Hollywood, though. What's his name? It doesn't matter. There's pedophiles everywhere. There's two in the this room right now. Can you unravel the mystery on this week's Scooby-Doo? It's sad. Who's that pedophile? It's

Jeff. How did you guys know I was horny for kid buds? I just, look, I just draw little faces on my dick with magic marker and I'm like Hey, blal-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l- You squeeze the dick like, hello? You strangle it? So it's like you're literally jerking off a kid. It's just like

I strangle my dick until he was purple. And I'm like, I I stick my dick in the dirt and I'm like, all right, I don't even know what I'm talking about. That'd be really funny if you got a little happy tattoo face in your dick. We think like a, what if you went to a tattoo parlor and you said, listen, I'm going to get...

Why are you so serious? Listen. Because this is a good idea. For not for me, though. Okay. What if you went to the... You said, listen, I'm going to get really erect and I want you to do your best to tattoo my dick and make it look like a little baby.

Like a baby? A little baby or a little kid. Like a little fetus baby Would the tattoo guy be like Yeah, I'll do that If you gave a certain of my money But the problem would be if that guy Can never get a ponder again

My dick already looks kind of fetusy Looks kind of like Cops would ever see that And be like just throw them in jail Wait no A lot of dicks There's a lot of weird women out there man A lot of dicks look like that

Dicks look fetishy to begin with They're kind of vainy and fucking pink Do you look at a lot of dicks It looked more like a fetus if it was limp Yeah Your guys dicks curve to the side Yeah Yeah, mine does

Talking about It curves to the side Mine's kind of bendy like a banana It's kind of curves up Fucking broken dicks Mine's zigzags Are you telling me your dick Doesn't curve to the side

I'm sure it has a bias To what's like slightly But what's what I'm saying It doesn't bend No mine doesn't fucking do a 90 degree High bad It does come on You have a fucking

You have a Someone took a hammer And smash your dick sideways And that's why it's like that Stamper we've talked about this before This is a safe place, Zach Just because his dick Points north

Stamper Do you guys have like The Dix to go straight out that goes straight up. Strait, mine bends up a bit. Some people have erections that kind of go out.

Mike goes up. Yeah, mine curves outward and then goes up. Yeah, that's what mine does. Mine follows a magdemeag, Earth's magnetic field slightly, that's all. Stamper.

You could actually supposedly elongate your penis by cutting the tendon that makes it go up and then your dick hangs forward more. Or you can just pull on it really hard and rid of it. I think cutting any tendon

is a bad idea. Yeah. Stamper, you told me that when you say take a poo, your balls hanging. into the water. They do. Okay, right. So if that's true, right? You have long, fucking balls. No, but listen, if that's true, then that means that your balls are longer than my dick. What? That means your balls are longer than my dick. His dick is much longer than your dick.

His balls are... No, when it's really hot, when it's really hot, yeah, my balls hang in the water. When I sit down on the toilet, I have to cup my ball, the side of my balls and hold my balls out of the water. That's weird, though, because like... That's why I keep telling you guys to flush the fucking toilet, because I don't want to dunk my balls in your shit piss. You need to fucking get your balls look at because they're not supposed to be that long. That's a really long. Your balls are... How long these actual sac?

Your balls are so long, dude, because... When it's really hot, don't your balls sag like... A lot. Like, a fucking pit bull? Yeah, like, that's what balls are designed to do. They're not, like, five feet long, dude. Yeah. Look, they graze the top.

They don't dunk in the water like, I'm bobbing for apples. They just, like, graze the top of the water. They, like, fall, like, maybe a couple centimeters in the water. When you do that, you have to, like, get the tissue and, like, dab your balls with it. Oh, my gosh. I'm so fucking sorry I suffer from long ball syndrome okay one day I was peeing in there and I was like Snapper's balls dip in this toilet sometimes and I was like wait a second that means his balls longer than my dick and that's kind of embarrassing For who both of us Jesus God

Are your balls longer than your dick? I think they're like about the same way Your balls are longer than you're about the same yeah, but the same yeah, I don't know you know I'd say my penis is shorted well When it's a flaccid it's yeah, it's more than my balls well yeah, as we're talking about My flaccid ball dick. I'm sure plenty of people running that problem. I'm not a fucking weirdo. Are you sure? You do have long balls, though.

That's just the fact. One time I was looking at Stappers sit down and he had this huge fucking bulge going down to his knees, but it might just be your balls. Yeah, you saw one on either side of my fucking... Oh my God. Do your balls are going to suck up your asshole, like a vacuum? No.

Like your assholes, like a black hole? Yeah, yeah. That is a common problem. Because when you're, like, taking a shit in the toilet, and you stand up too fast. Your balls will you center for... Oh, stop. And fall up into your bum.

And because you're standing up, there's like an air getting sucked up into it. So if you actually swing forward, then swing back. That's the most dangerous thing you can do. What you're supposed to do is you're supposed to spread your legs as far as the go. Grab your balls while you stand and stand up and then put them in front of your legs when you close them.

I knew a kid in high school that got one ball removed. That was not a fun. That was not a fun. It's not a fun time for a high school kid to know when everybody knows you have one ball. Yeah, that's mean. We had a teacher who had one nut, and everyone made fun of him

because he was an asshole. He was my PE teacher. Yeah. I didn't even had people even find out. People just find out. I don't know. Chris, let's talk about, you had a skilled dream a couple days ago,

did you? Yeah. You were sure? Well, it wasn't so much the dream. It was how I woke up from it. It was, I was having a nuclear dream with nukes going off

because Zach made me watch that fucking nuclear movie. Everybody says nuclear. Nuclear. Nuclear. Why does everybody see nuclear? Because, It's seriously one of the things that Bush said, like it's one of these common

misconceptions misconstrued words. Like, but everybody says it. Like, it doesn't just... You know what I think? I honestly feel like people say... It's okay. I honestly feel like people say nuclear because it rolls off the tongue better. And for the most part, a lot of people say nukes.

I just say, I never had a problem saying nuclear. It just seems like... Nuclear? Is that the right one? Yeah. Yeah. It's okay. We still love you on.

Zach, made me watch that weird movie. What was it called? Uh, the day after. Oh yeah, it was a pretty good movie. But anyways, I went to bed. It was the day after that, which is kind of weird. I was dreaming about nukes going off, and then we live next to the fucking train. Oh, so we live near the fire engine, and we live near the train.

So the fucking... Now they can pinpoint their exact address. Yep, down to the T. Oh, so the fire, the raid alarm went off? The raid alarm went off, and I started having that nuclear dream, and then the fucking train went, Bhr! And I went, ah! And I woke up, but I fucking shit my pants.

Cool. Literally? Yeah. Sweet, dude. Yes. That's what I was watching. my mattress recently. I didn't wash a mattress.

I spit my hand in my rubber on my... Chris. Chris, Yeah? When were you came on stairs and you were like... Hey, Dum-Dum, you're gonna have to speak up. You can't sit there like a dopey dummdum. Hey, Chris, when were you came to the stairs and you're like...

There you go, baby boy. Chris, when you came to the stairs and you were like, uh... Hey, Zach, you know, the AP goes off and I was like, yeah, you're like, is it fuck with hard drives? And I was like, what? And I put it together. You must have a nightmare that your fucking hard drives got fried from nuclear war, didn't you? No.

No, I was genuinely... hard drives are the case of nuclear because I've got so many hard drives I was wondering that if an EMP went off would ruin all your hair drives I like I was so wide that the nuclear war's happening my hard drives all got ruined I would have no none of my pictures of my you be fucking dead I don't care though I want I want something to be left you'd be dead I'd be dead dude dude dude dude dude dude dude dude dude up you see if we'd be dead we'd be fucking dead I hope you die oh no Jeff what you ask me I don't really hope you die I don't want I was saying we were I want people to respect my wishes and wipe my hard drives at the event of my death, please? A little while ago, we were talking about...

That's as good as well. We're recommending nuclear war movies to each other. Right. I guess you... I'd recommend it war games, even though it's kind of a cheesy 80s movie. I liked it. It was cheesy enough. It was cheesy the right way. Oh, is that odd? Do you want to play a game? Yes. Yeah, Matthew Broderick, yeah.

Or no, is it, shall we play a game? Shall we play a game? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It kind of sounds like Captain Dickhead a little bit. Shall we play a game? My name is Captain Dickhead. Let's play a game. Sweet. I miss that guy. Where's he at?

I don't know. We should invite him on the show sometime. He just fucked off and went to Florida. Captain Dickender. Yeah, what's up with that? And Spass Kid? Spass Kid. Anyway, yeah, good movie. Anyway, yeah, the end. I don't know where I was going with that.

Terminator 2 is a good nuke movie. Yeah, that's... Shad recommended to be a boy in his dog. That's kind of like a post-apocalyptic movie, but it's still very good. Fuck you. That doesn't count. So do you like no actual war happening? It could be. It could be more. Stapp, what would you do in a nuclear war event?

You're going to have to speak up, Zach. Stamper, what would you do in the event of a nuclear war? I don't know. If you were walking to a wall wall and you heard, wee, weeu, and a man come out and say, bomb falling, bomb falling, bomb. I'm falling, you die! We don't hurt my feelings, Zach. What would you do, Stamper?

Wait, I'm gonna do the sound. Hey, guy, hey you. Yeah, you with an ESIG. A bomb is falling. The Russians are nuking us. They're gonna be here in 10 minutes. Oh, God. Don't look into the explosion.

I don't know. I'll probably just stand there. I could... Just wait for it to happen. I'd wait for it to explode, and I turn around and pull down my pants and spread my ass. I let the explosion go up hit.

I want the bomb to land straight in my ass for the ultimate sexual experience. It would only last for like 0.1 of a second. But you're like, ah! Zach's like, the bomb is falling. I'm like, where is it? And go out with my ass friend, I just throw it straight to it. When it hits you, it's like, boom. When it, right before it hits the earth, I kind of leap off the ground with my toes so I can force myself straight.

You can't. Watch it hit like my left butt cheek and I totally... Fucking spit you out. Hmm. What's the, what's the, was I, in fact, did I get irradiated? No, you were in your basement. No, the bombs have dropped me. Let's say, let's say you're at Wawa, right?

Yeah. Some dudes, it's like, dude, did you hear? Like, you hear the sirens, do you hear? The bobs are coming. China's nuking us. They're going to be here in 15 minutes. Like the entire East Coast has been destroyed. No, no, no, they're coming.

Oh. They're on the way. Do I have time to escape? They're going to, they're going to hit the, you're going to hit the alien at 15 minutes. You five minutes. So if I five or 15 minutes. minutes to live. Yeah, but what I did. Let live, you don't know if you're going to live or not.

Yeah, what would you do? Because they're going to Philadelphia City. I would go to giant supermarket, get one of those rotissory chickens, go back, put on, like, Terminator 2, and eat the chicken and relax. Let's see what happens? Yeah. What if everybody heard that

nukes were coming and they figured it'd be pointless to get in their car and drive away because I think the roads would be too congested? But everybody thought that, so we all just sat here and died. I know what I'd do. I'd go, I'd drive my drive over to the deaf center and just park outside and just go I would uh... I don't know what I do

because they're deaf so they don't know what's happening. They don't hear the sirens. Yeah, they're just relaxing in there and I'm just gonna pretend it one of them? Yeah. Just go inside and go out peacefully? You know that or just stand outside and like laugh. I don't know I wouldn't make fun of them, no, just... What if somebody runs in? What would your last act make you

put in dead people? What could you do? What could you do with a deaf person with impending death coming and they didn't know it was coming? Dude, somebody's going to read a closed caption news program and run in and do frantic sign language and you're all going to stand up and go, who are coming? What is the person living doing sign language?

It's trying to say like the nuke is about to drop. They're like, oh! It'd be like fucking dance signals. Those shapes that they fall in your dancing. Yeah. These sign language movements you've never seen in your life that they're just like this epic sign language movements. It would be like...

It would be so blurry. You wouldn't even be able to see it. They need their entire arm to like do them for like the atomic bomb. It's so rare, like, there's a little sense of satisfaction when, because they've never gotten to use, like, the, the mushroom cloud sign language before. They just

holding with their arm, and they, like, expand their arms over the head, like a mushroom cloud. But then, do they all panic verbally, or do they all panic with sign language, like, oh! That actually is a really good scene where it's, like, a bunch of these guys trying to, like, commute that, and they're just like, they can't even say nuclear bomb, they're like,

and then they're just like, Dibu Bob! And then they finally get it, it's like, nuke, it's like, oh yeah. Oh, because like it takes it so long to explain the point. It's so long of silence, it's like, it's like... The dude's like, it's the one

guy's doing the nuclear bomb, some of the other guys put his hands on these little legs running in that direction. Do you think we'll ever have a debt president? A deaf president? Yeah. That would be weird. That would be weird. My... You think he goes up on stage

like a stand-up comedian? He's like, No, I know I talk funny, but let's get serious. This gets straight to the point. His first speech would be like, my fellow Americans, he'd finish, and all the deaf people would be like, yay! They'll probably fix deaf people, like, within 50 years.

Probably won't even be any... You know, it's weird. They're already starting to, um... They've done a few... Oh, the other, the... What are they called? They're like 3D-pring ear implants. Yeah, but see, I'm, like, really on the fence

about, like, how to feel. Like, you know, there's all these uplifting videos with this uplifting music, and it's like, and now she's going to hear what a crunching apple sounds like for the first time. But then it's like, who's to say that they're hearing it right? Like maybe a crunching apple sounds like, uh-huh, to them.

Because they installed their... I mean, it's not like they're... I don't think they're installing, like, all-new wiring. It's like the basic pieces are in there. I think they're just one little thing missing. Yeah, but... Yeah, I know that, but, like, who's to say that they're hearing it the way it's supposed to be heard?

Because it's still kind of beta technology. Yeah, I mean... It's all subjective. It's like, who's to say, say that, you know, I see what you see. Yeah, so if you get like eye implants they're like, wow, I can see, but like maybe they see like

strawberries is green or whatever. Like, you know. We're all green to Zach somehow, our version of green. You think we'll have a one president, a chick president, or a black fuck no! You think of a black chick president ever? It'll be a cold day in hell before we have a black president, my friend.

Ewe. Every time I see news about Obama, he's always doing like weird things like talking about Robin Williams and what's his name, Roger Ebert died and he's like, yeah, he really touched the movie industry and I'm like, would you please get back to work and get off your fucking Twitter? Like, what's he

talking about Roger Ebert for? I didn't know that Roger Ebert lost his jaw. Did you see like... Yeah, do you know about that? I had no idea. He looks like Ernie from the Muppets. He doesn't have people to... He doesn't even recognizable. I'm sorry. I just say it like I see it. His robot voice is pretty good though.

Yeah, he was all like... Hello, I am Roger Dibird. That's really good, actually. That's freaky. I don't know how you do that. You suck in. That's fucking crazy. Do it right into the mic.

Do it like a Mac. What do I say? Yeah, Chris is just talking normally. Say, put your finger in my butt hole. I like the way it feels. Put your finger in my butthole. I like the way it feels. It's the S's that sell it.

That's really good. Your finger in my ass. That's the most talented thing you can do, Chris. You go like... Sussus. He is like, you've selected Microsoft Sam. It's your computer's default voice. Damn it, Chris. You like it?

I can't do it. I can't. It's my try it and I just can't. I can't. I can't. Zach, what's the dumbest voice you can do? What guys? How's going? Hell yeah. I'm not. I was like mid-sadden. I'm like, he's just going to be that good. Yeah, it was the bomb dropping and when you open your mouth, there's the mushroom cloud. Stamper, you do with funny noise.

I don't really know what to do. I can talk like this. What the fuck? I don't know. Jeff, that's really unsettling. I don't like that. That is very terrible. Do it, can you do like a, like a...

Fuck you. You have to like laugh like a baby. I know. Hey, little girl. Hi. Come here. That is horrifying. Jeff, here, Jeff, you talk to stapper.

How do you do that, Chris? Oh, I see. Now it's just Elmo impressions. How's a go, Jeff? Pretty good. No! I don't have any whizabeth? Bo-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Let's go find a big black band and suck them off. Hurtall! Yeah! Bho! Ha-ha-ha-ha! Bha-ha! I don't have any wacky voices like that. Snap, for the funniest thing you can do is the...

What? Do your scream. What? Just do a scream. I need scream. It's funny. That's funny. Yeah. Yeah.

That's comedy. That's pretty funny. And any voices you like, you like. You do. you can do Chris and you're like, all I usually just talk like this. Chris can do gloom from Lord of the Rings. It's like, just the voice I do.

You can do Galloom from Lord of the Rings. Yeah, do Gallum from Lord of the Rings. Hello, I'm Goulogne. I couldn't do it. I won't do it. Yeah, that's pretty good. I can't do it. I can't do it.

I can't fucking do it. It's so frustrating. I can't either. You know what everybody can do what I can't do is fucking Mickey Mouse. I can't do it. Everybody others can do Mickey Mouse. You're fucking fucking old. You're just missing that piss on your voice.

You know Rodrigo? He can do a perfect goofy. I can't do Mickey very well. You just spoke really high like this. I just got to be like, oh, that's the high said go. Smoke and ruin my voice.

Do it bugs bunny. Yeah, what's up? That's pretty close. I can't do it either. Just got like a Brooklyn, like a whitey Jewish Brooklyn accent. You're really good at it at, was it, was it?

Oh yeah. Yeah, but I have to strangle myself. like, yes, lick my winner. Does the, what's his name do it? Who? The guy, the voice actor for Bejita, does he do that too? No, no, no. Like when Tom Kenny does, like, the SpongeBob

laugh, he has to manipulate his throat, yeah. And Mick, Mick is really good. It's like, Mick did Goku, right? Yeah. He just has a Goku voice, though. He nailed that somehow. I don't know how. He can do Bejita better than me, too. See, that's what I'm talking about when people, like, you're a voice actor stamp around. I'm like,

I'm hell no. Like, Mick is a voice actor because he's got range. You throw anything at Mick. He's like, I don't know, I'll give it a shit. Say, hey, Mick, can you do John Rambo? And he's like, I'll give it a shot. I'm John Rambo. And didn't do it perfectly. You're like, shut the fuck up, dude. He did Snape from Harry Potter perfectionally. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It was like, unbelievable.

He, like, he had cheddar in the back of his throw, like, Ronald. I don't know how he did it. I'm no fucking idea. He's getting such a heart on right now listening to this. I know, fucking. He's going to post about it on Twitter. His little fucking tic-tac wieners getting getting so stiff right now You know what are really funny

When dicks are so small That they have the ball seam Going up to the tip of the dick What? It's the funny shit Can you explain that a little bit? You know the ball seam? Yeah

It like stretches to the tip of the dick Because the dick's so small Wow your dick gets a really small Jesus It's pretty small Yeah his dick looks like a yam That was stitched together Frankenstein yams

Let's just say when I stand up It tickles my bum. I want to put my thumb between my two fingers out. It looks like when you're like... It's not all red and creepy like that. Oh, all right. I'm going to go on. I've said it once.

I'll say it again. My friend Jack has a brown dick, even though he's white. And you've seen it. Every white guy has a brown dick, except for you, you fucking disgusting. Mine's like Christmas. You said that before.

It's true. It's like a descriptive you constantly use for your wiener. It's true. It's pale. The only thing your dick has in common with Christmas is... It snows. Is it... It's cold. It's because it's got dandruff. Nailed it.

Christmas doesn't have dandruff. Hey, Snapper, what do you think they don't make in China? Black people? Chinese. Wait, do they kill the boys or the girls there? It's true! Do they kill girls, right? Kill gorillas?

Girlers. Yes. Yeah. They don't be girls there. Oh my goodness. That's bad. It's talking about... Oh, wait. We were saying... It's like a riddle.

You were going to talk about the place. places we liked, like, places we've been we didn't like, are like the least, like, visited. Just do full-on hatred without any filtered. Even if it's a place, you kind of like, what's the worst place, what's the worst part about it? And then be angry about it. You start, Jeff. Just go, just rail. I've been in South Korea, and I could talk about that a little bit. Do it. First of all, during the summer, it's, I don't know how interesting this is going to be, but it's more humid there every single fucking day in the summer than it is.

The average humid day over there is more humid than the most humid day anywhere in the United States. It's true, though. It's something that people wouldn't really expect when you think about, like... I don't know if they're closer to the equator. I don't know what it is, but it's... It is unfucking bearable. And those people, they've, like, evolved. What do you mean those people? Those dang dirty Koreans. The damn South Koreans. They've evolved not to sweat. Like, every white person over there. Every pasty white person was sweating their balls off.

All these dudes, all those other Koreans are just standing around watching Breaking Bad on their, like, sell on their phones. Their TV phones. And like Walter White is like, oh, Twitch, how much, tell him, Jesse Pinkerman. No, no, it was like, it was subtitled, but it was kind of funny seeing them watch that over there. But, do you mean that when they come over, like, to somewhere that's not human at all? Do they just like, do they, like, break out in rashes or whatever? I don't know. What do you mean, day?

Those filthy chinks. Okay? Those damn slants. But they didn't, they didn't bother air conditioning their stores. See, that's one thing. Everything is hot as fuck. When people talk about, like, vacationing abroad to, you know, like, Korea or Japan, the one thing you never hear anybody talk about is the weather, ever.

So, like, you'll never know these things. There's actually good knowledge to have that Korea is a sweltering hellhole. And then as I'm, as I'm experiencing this, this one, like, my brother's, as a Korean girlfriend owner, she's telling me about a fan death. And I'm like, what is fan death? Have you guys heard of this? No. I think it's a, yeah. It's a superstition that they believe

if you run a fan in a room at night, it can suck like the air out of the room and kill you. No joke. What? Even though a fan is pretty much scientifically proven just to push air. Push air. Push air around the room. It does nothing with the oxygen molecule.

Do they mean if you have a fan blowing hot air out of your room? exhaust? Not even in or as. If there's a ceiling fan running, if there's like a little portable fan on the table, they believe it can kill you. I almost feel like if I live there for long enough, that will rub off on you. Or possibly it can, or like one of the explanations is it can make a room cool down so fast if a coldness can kill you. I don't know what it, I don't know what the explanation is, but it is so crazy that manufacturers over there have bowed to this superstition and they put like an auto, they put a timer on their fans

over there, so they go off at night. So. people aren't scared that they'll die in their sleep. So it's like the 13th floor sort of thing. Yeah, yeah. It's just, they do know that that's stupid and wrong, right? You would think, but they don't. No, I got into a big argument with this because this girl was, she's like very smart and intelligent, but she just believed this one particular thing, and I'm getting mad, I'm like, you're kidding me.

This is nonsense. She's like, no, this is true. That's so weird, people can just, God. That's just like beyond. reason. Yeah. The only fan death I have to worry about is becoming too popular. Am I right, Zach?

Yes. Did you fall asleep? His story wasn't that fucking boring. Anyway, I don't know what I don't have to say besides, like, Korea, South Korea is very much just like, it's as much a bizarreo America as, like, Canada is. There were, like, three sides of the same coin, kind of. They're all, uh, South Korea is almost like the world of, what's the movie, Blade Runner, where everything's, like, more advanced.

a little, but it's also dirtier. It's dirtier and more advanced at the same time. It's gritty. Yeah, like, I couldn't figure out how to open the door to McDonald's because it was like automated somehow. There was some special sensor you had to push, and I couldn't even fucking find it.

All the toilets I'd find, all the American toilets had like 30 buttons on them. I didn't know what they meant either. They had a slanty eye scanner on everything. You have to push your eyes back with the tips of your fingers. Yeah. It's weird. It's a little weird over there.

I didn't like certain aspects, but it was cool in other aspects, I guess. I guess I don't want to be unfair. What do you hate, Chris? The worst place I've ever been. Dublin. Was where I cale from in my country. Do you want to guess where it was? Dublin?

No. Wexford. Dublin. Dublin. Okay. But, yeah, I hate Dublin. Because every time I go there, something horrible happens. Like...

Like what? Like, the first time I was, like, there was, like, 15 with my friends. and I was walking in a street and we were walking by some shop with a hash leaf on the front of it and I was like are they allowed to show the hash leaf on the front

and some guy just like smash me in my face he split my lip open and kept walking and another time I was there I went into McDonald's and I was eating food and this old lady came in and she shoved her hand on my food she was like this is where I sit

and I was like great and I left and then just every time I go there something horrible happens I'm sorry Chris it's fine I don't have to live there I did have to live there when I was in college

so it was a little plenty of fucking bullshit. What do you not like about America? Um, let me think. I, you know what? Everything that's bad here is bad at Lino, elsewhere. Right. I guess the police here are crazier, but not

really in this area. In Ireland, can the cops carry guns? No. Which is, it's pretty cool, except that they're all kind of pussies. Like, that's where all the videos come from where all the kids are like, what are you going to do faggot and they really can't do anything. Yeah, like, in Ireland, like I've had a situation in Ireland,

where like people have been getting hassled on the street you call the police, they show up, but they just pretty much be like, look, you just need to stop that now or we'll have to come back. And then they're like, okay. And then they can just continue and run away. But usually, the police in Ireland are good enough that they'll usually catch people when something bad's

going on, even if they've already gotten away. They wear those stupid British police hats or do they have more American? Oh, like Bobby hats. Bobby hats. They don't have Bobby hats. They've got like the flat top ones. Oh, okay. Yeah, you have to get used to the way we handle cops around

here. So protocol in America for dealing with cops is to hate cops and go online and talk about how much you hate cops and then go around and harass and film them and upload those videos and then continue talking about how bad cops are even though you're fucking with them all day. You know,

they're 13 and they've never even had a run in with a cop. But they're like, fuck cops. The cops here have been really great. The cops in our area they've been really amazing. I've never had a fucking problem with a single cop in my entire life. I have. I have. I have. I've met a lot of fucking horrible police officers, but it's not to say like, because there's a ton of great cops, but it is the one profession where that old saying that one apple spoils the whole bunch, it applies to police officers more than anyone else.

Because, you know, there could be like 50 cops on the force, but if one of them is going out doing crooked shit, then all of a sudden you fucking hate cops. Regardless of the other guys, they're just out there trying to do a good job, which is fucked up, but it happened. It just seems like these guys, I'm not to sound too sympathetic, but they deal with assholes all day long. And I'm like, I'm not interested in contributing to that. I'm just, I figured if I'm respectful to them, they won't give me any shit back. And that's... For the most part, it's true, yeah. So far, it's worked out.

I do see cops fucking with kids and stuff. And there are some times where you really raise an eyebrow out there at their actions. I just fucking hate these YouTube videos of these little dickheads carrying around their AK-47 down the highway. Yeah, like they walk in front of a police car just to get the cop to notice them. Yeah, I'm gonna prank cops today. What are you gonna do? I'm in my right, it's my right. No, it's not even about pranking. There's people going to like chili or that chili, what's it called?

Oh, uh, Chipotle. Yeah, they go in there with like AK-47s. They're like, it's our right. Yeah. You're just, you're scaring people who just want to buy a fucking burrito, you cunts. Fucking idiots. This should be shot. Those guys with their cell phones where they're like,

I've never right to film you. I'm just going to sit here and put my camera in your face. Yeah. And then they get upset. And they almost get upset and the cop reacts calmly. They're just like, well,

it's within your rights, sir, but, you know, if you could just listen to what I'm saying. Yeah, you're getting in my way for something I'm trying to do.

Or these fucking cunts that, uh, when a cop is trying to deal with somebody else for another situation, like disorderly conduct or whatever, some asshole runs up to them with the phone.

He's like, what do you do? What are you arrested him for? Huh? Huh? Like getting in the cops, getting all up in the cops grill about it.

and cops like, sir, he's back away. I'm trying to deal with this situation. I have my rights. I have my rights, man. Yeah. Hey, so it's a monumental day, and it's a better word for this. But it's the first time that anyone's ever fallen asleep during a sleepy cast. Zach has officially fallen asleep.

So we're going to make up lies about him as he sits there like the piece of shit he is. Oh, I also hate, I hate Jackson. Jews, Arabs, Japs! What? He woke up. I hate Jacksonville, Florida. The grand majority of Florida, to be honest, and I hate Los Angeles. What are you guys talking about?

What are you guys talking about? The places we hate. Oh. You little sleepy snake? Everything I said still stands. Okay. Why do you hate a Florida Stamper? Lots of reasons, but also because it's kind of a grim shithole.

Yeah, it seems really, it seems like, it seems flat, kind of boring, really humid, and it's kind of, like scary. There's like a lot of drugs and shit. That kind of stuff going on. Yeah, the areas I was in, they weren't the, I was in West Palm and, but I hated the fact that it rained every fucking 20 minutes and I just had a really bad time down. You know, like, I'm sure that, you know, there's a lot of good, you know, Swains from Florida and, you know, there's a lot of good people in Florida, but you can't really put your finger on why, but every now and again, you'll go to a place you've never been to before. And it's not like you're carrying a bad attitude with you, but the second you get off the plane, you just know that you're not going to

have a good time there. There's just a vibe about it. That's what, yeah, like, that's how I feel about it with Dublin. It's like the second, I step off a train, I'm in Dublin City, I feel fucking scared. It's just a sense of dread, and like, it's just your gut, pretty much, right? Yeah, it's just your gut. Like, you can go to some place you've never been, like,

you get off in, some, in fucking Montana and see how you feel there. Dublin's full of scary people, like, one time, I was with a girl at the time, and I was visiting her in her, like, flat. Was that Jack the Ripper? Or, no, that was UK, right? That was UK.

No, no, Dublin, yeah, no. But one time I was, like, leaving in the flat, right? And I went outside, and this, like, it was, like, at a hostel, too. This, like, group of, like, eight-year-old kids ran up to me, and they were all, like, wearing shitty clothes. And one of them had cellot tape wrapped around in its face, so, like, couldn't see his face. And they were all wearing hoodies, and they were like,

you got any gear, mate, or whatever. And I was just like, no, sorry. I was, like, dressed in a track suit, and I had a backpack, so I looked kind of scummy, but they kept following me down the street. And then one of them grabbed my backpack, and I turned around, was like, They all fucking ran

It was fucking scary though Sweet dude Not really Do those stories actually happen When like a woman walks up And throws you a baby And you catch the baby And then all her kids run up

And steal all the shit out of your pockets Why you're holding the baby No That didn't happen in Ireland That's sweet dude Oh kid was a shithead He was like Got any gear

No You gotta establish your ground You have to lean down and be like Do you have any gear faggot? And he's like No just as sweet And he gives you a little tutsy roll. I was trying to play it nicely at first.

It was like, no, sorry, I don't do that. No, I kept walking. And then when they grabbed my bag, I was terrified. I thought they'd steal my shit. They were just talking about, like, loot or, like... They were talking about drugs. Oh. That's what gear means.

Really? Yeah. Oh. That doesn't seem right. They're kids. I know. That's why it was scary. I was asking you for, like, your camera.

I was like, these guys probably have, like... I thought they probably had, like, their big brothers waiting around or some shit. Yeah, like, Chris just pulls a big cog out of his pocket. He's like, here you go. They're like, random machinery in your backpack. Hi. Now, you're talking about the bathroom and the bloody toilet paper? You're probably even joking about that, right?

Yeah. But you know what I heard what you can do? You get black toilet paper, right? Mm-hmm. And you whip your ass with it, and you see brown on black. Why? I don't know. I don't look at my toilet paper.

You know what else? You know what else that reminded me of? One time they came out with green ketchup, and they just colored a green just cause. Yeah, they had purple ketchup, too. I know, but did you ever try eating? something with green ketchup? I felt sick after two seconds. It tasted the exact same, but just looking at it,

made me want to kill myself. Yeah, there's a lot of theory behind color when it comes to food. You know, they say that if you eat a lot of your meals off of blue plates. Yeah, you fill up faster. Yeah, because blue is an off-putting color when it comes to eating.

If you put blue food coloring in something delicious like macaroni and cheese, you'll eat like a quarter of it because blue is an incredibly rare occurring color in nature. Not much food comes in blue. I mean, you could argue the blueberries do, but truthfully, they're more dark purple violet. Yeah, like, just, I don't know, it's just eating it and looking at the color is just gross. But if you were blind, you'd be like, oh, yeah, and it tastes the exact same. You know, they had purple ketchup. This is to make ketchup fun for kids. But when you're a kid, you like ketchup. It's not like they did it.

When I was a kid, I was like six when that happened. It was like green ketchup and I just didn't want to eat it anymore. Anyways, all right, so Zach's asleep. I'm so tired. You look like a little, like a baby mouse, like a little pinky. Oh, I'm so tired. Pinky mouse. Oh, yeah, we're going to talk about the Wilhelm scream. Oh, so here's something we were talking about at dinner to wrap this whole fucking thing up.

Mm. The Wilhelm scream. Woo! To open, to open that can of worms up. You know, we should edit the thing right here. Let's have, let's have a... Yeah, this fucking thing. Oh!

Oh, I hate it. that fucking piece of shit jokes aside it's not even like a nagging thing it's a fucking travesty and it shouldn't be used anymore wait wait so there's some people out there who literally have no fucking idea

what you're talking about right they just heard it no I know but still the problem are like what the fuck are these guys talking about right so the history of the Wilhelm scream it's a sound effect of a man screaming that it must be like 70 years old at this point yeah you can see

I think it originated from an old black and white western movie where a dude fell up a horse and he was like it began to become an inside joke with sound engineers or guys editing sound where they would throw it into random movies or TV shows Yeah, chances are it's in every single one of your favorite movies

There are montages or compiled clips on YouTube of it being in, it goes like a hundred clips long but you'll see you hear it in comedies and fucking Batman and God of War Indiana Jones, Star Wars, Harry Potter Lord of the Rings, Game of Thrones.

From the beginning of that scream all the way up to the fucking New Hobbit movies. Not to say, I don't know if they're in the new Hobbit movies. I'm pretty sure they were in everything. But the reason we're talking about this is because it's now a problem because it sucks you out of the movie instantly the second you hear it because you know what it is.

It's overdone at this point. So basically the whole thing is sound designers think they're in on this big joke whenever they use it. They think they're being original and hilarious. But truth is, It's in every single movie ever and at this point it just needs to die because it just sucks out the immersion and kills the moment I was watching Game of Thrones right yeah it's a really great show and I was so into it it seems so fucking fucking Fawless yeah up until this one point when they played the fucking Wilhelm scream and I was sucked out it made me so angry

I was so into it was the first time in so long I'd been like really into it Yeah, something you know no totally pull it once you're aware of it it ruins every it ruins any gamer movie you're watching You, like, when I bought God of War III within the first 30 seconds of the first cinematic Like, the camera epically panned down to hell And there are all these goblins running around Of course a goblin falls off a bridge

So too did the might of the Olympians And they played the fucking roll-hines screen Dude, like, I wanted to turn the fucking game off I'm actually being reserved with how much I hate that fucking thing I swear to God, every time I hear that scream I want to turn whatever I'm looking at off It's like, imagine that you're playing

any game, like a Resident Evil game, but for one second of that game, a picture of Shaquille O'Neal's face just shows up on the screen and then goes away. It's never subtle. It's always punctuated. It always punctuates scene. Yeah. And you just like, oh my God, if I see that fucking picture of Shaquille O'Neal one more time, I'm gonna fucking... And it's the same exact thing, because it totally destroys the immersion, and it's a bad quality sound to begin with. It's like, it's how nobody screams. It has, like, background noise. Yeah, yeah, that's what I mean. It's like, it's got fuzz behind it, and they try to, like, tweak it to make it fit in well, But it doesn't, it never works right.

But another thing that that's related to was the fact we were saying that when movies rely on using sound libraries, they never really edit the sounds to make it suit. So, like, especially if you're a content creator, like me Stamper, Jeff, or Zach, we have sound libraries saved for a computer that we've heard all these sound effects a million times. So every time you... Yeah, we have plenty of, plenty of collection. This is what you're supposed to do when you use a sound effect. You're supposed to bring it to an audio editing, like a piece of software, and you change it ever so slightly so the person doesn't really. realize it's that sound. You can do this in a variety of ways. You could change it up, slow it down. Change the pitch or add more sounds on top of it so it blends in more.

Pitch it down. If it's an explosion, then layer two explosions and put them both at 50% volume. But what we're trying to really get here to in the long run is that sound designers or sound engineers in Hollywood are fucking hacks. They just use the sounds, throw them in, and then they're done and they get paid 20 grand. Yeah, if you're a sound designer and you're just pulling shit off a CD, a pre-prepared Sony sound effects CD for movies and shit, Then you're not a sound designer. You're a guy with the fucking CD. The editor could do that. Yeah.

Would you like to mention the latest sound that is bothering you in the door? Oh, my God. There is this one sound that bothers me more than fucking anything, and you've heard it a million times. It's the sound of this rusty gate opening, and they use it on everything. If somebody opens an oven, it's like this... You could probably have it.

Yeah, you have it. I have it all over the place. This is it. This is it. Yeah, right here. They use it on any door regardless of whether it's fucking rusty or not, every prison door. It's spreading his asshole. Yeah.

Anything. It's fucking ridiculous. I hate, there's a handful of sounds like that that I'm so sick and tired of hearing, but that one stands above and beyond every other fucking sound. It was in that new piece of shit show, Sleepy Hollows. For example, in the first episode, they used it twice, back to back. Fucking, what was I going to say there? I swear, like the same audio guy is doing.

and all these brand new shows. They don't, yeah, they're... When I hear that rusty door sound, I shut off whatever I'm watching, regardless of what it is. Yeah, I could mention how... It's not sound-related, but it's the same vein, you could say,

where once you start creating media with, like, existing libraries... Oh, you're talking about fonts. That's what I wanted to say. You're talking about fonts? Yeah, once you start being aware of font libraries as a graphic designer, everywhere you look, every store,

everything, you start seeing the same fonts, and everything just looks so much lazier to you. Yeah. Every piece of signage looks incredibly lazy. What I hate is when somebody uses a, like a grunch font, when, like, the letters are torn up. Yeah. But then they use the A the same time, and it's like the same A. So they didn't trash, like, the second A in a different way.

But when I do see that they actually put the effort in to, like, make the second A look better or whatever, then I immediately get 100% more respect for them. Yeah. That's true. Yeah, yeah. people hopefully people understand what we're talking about people just need to not be lazy that's it it's like if there's a font of like

somebody like a really rough like painting with like a paintbrush these letters and they use the exact same letter twice in a row it's like then they're just hacking shit out on their computer it ruins the illusion that it was painted or stamped or whatever which was the whole point of the font to begin

yeah you know what the like the best way to do anything like that is is to like even though it might look a little worse you might as well just create your own font or create your own sound effects. Yeah. Because then people will never call you on anything. Even if the sound effect is like slightly worse, no one's gonna give a shit. Unwashed masses won't notice, but everybody in your field will know. Oh yeah, absolutely. Blum. Don't be lazy. Or be lazy, but don't call yourself a fucking engineer or a designer if you're fucking, if everything you do

takes you 30 fucking seconds. These guys probably just have no passion about what they're working on anyway. I guarantee you that don't. I bet they're underpaid and... Anyway, it's time to wrap. up this shit show. Time to wrap up this shitty podcast. This podcast full of retards. Thanks for listening to shitty cast. Ah, I mean, uh. Anyway, this is there and the flip a, uh, sleepy cast.

Welcome. Bye. Good night. Thanks for listening to Sleepycast episode six. Teen. Um, that's for listening. Oh.

Oh. And this is, this is, this is, this is. This is the first real official sleepy cast You could say because Zach fell asleep During it Bye sleepy heads Bye I love how little you care about your fans and listeners

All you had to do is stay up for like 30 minutes Dude I got up at 3 a 10 heaven What is that? Not even 24 hours Oh fuck you What pussy bitch Okay

Is your brain still conscious enough to tell me a joke Zach? Yeah Stamper's light There you go brother said. Okay, so this has been Sleepy Cast, episode six. We've been here with Johnny Utah.

Good night. Me, good night. Stamper. Good morning. And, uh, Sneep, Zachary. That's me. Thanks for listening.

Bye. Don't forget each other. The new trends at the school. Don't let the boy take your lunch, money, and whatnot. Fuck y'all. I got to pee at my lead.

Bob, I don't need to work. Not that, I think I'll do fine, you know. I think I'll get mugged, you know, I'll be fine. How long's my dick been hanging out, guys? Jesus Christ. Those are your balls. My balls are completely normal. Sleepy Kevin, a safe haven during the hour of the wolf.

Peace out.