SleepyCabin - SleepyCast 22 - [Beating the Monkey]

Episode Date: April 17, 2015

Join the gang for an enlightening discussion about...this and that? Plus there's lots of viewer questions in store. This episode starring: Psychicpebbles (www.youtube.com/Psychicpebbles) Oney (www.youtube.com/OneyNG) Ricepirate (www.youtube.com/ricepiratenewgrounds) +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Yo, we're on Patreon if you wanna throw us a buck! http://www.patreon.com/SleepyCabin A SUPER SPECIAL THANKS to some of our generous supporters: Paul Raymond, John Erlinger, Creeps McPasta, Hector I. Murillo, Susparty, Dave Cummings, MobileSpider, Timothy Smith, Alexander Lee, James Vilhelmsen, Magnus Ramskov Poulsen, John Toomey, k0xfilter, skooks, Sonny Canchola, Liam Staley, Dim, Sindre Norheim, Hayward Cole, Denis DeLong, Jace Baker, Duncan Neilson, Jacob Miller, Shane Danells, Ryan Pagonis, Trevor Wood, Tanner Anderson, Brian Adam, Lewis Brady +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ SleepyCabin Official Site! http://www.sleepycabin.com SleepyCabin on YouTube! http://www.youtube.com/SleepyCabin Stay tuned on Facebook! https://www.facebook.com/SleepyCabin ...or Twitter! https://twitter.com/sleepycabin +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ We're on iTunes, too! Search for SleepyCabin!

There is a world as tangible as our own, impossible to see yet unavoidable to sense. A world enveloped by a seemingly unending ocean of forests. Buried deep in that forest, tucked away neatly within a blanket of twilight, lies a quaint little cabin. And in that cabin, it's a bunch of guys, he's a bunch bullshitter. Oops, you ready? Yep. my head.

Can you not do it in that voice? Huh? Welcome to Sleepycast, guys. We've got our nice little crew right here. We've got Oni and Jane. We've got psychic peppers. And we've got me

Rice Pirate. We're here today. We're going to do our little podcast. Something a little bit different. We want to change this up a little bit. Yeah, sorry. I actually I'm just throwing this out. You guys now. coming. Wham!

Wham! Was that supposed to be like the air horn? Like, boom, boom. It was like the challenger approaching thing. Hey, Blanca, come on in here. Come on, Durel. Hello, I am the mailman. I'll deliver the mail every day.

Hello. Sometimes Chris spits on me in points and says, non-human, son human, and I run away. What's ironic is it? You're the one who actually does that. Please, Durel. Don't, don't Chris be me to you. Sorry, Durel.

Thank you. Everyone, everyone get a round of applause for Durel. Chris, you're a race. Dude, I'll get out of here. I hate that black guy. So I want to change the shit up a little bit. We had a lot of questions from our Patreon supporters that we didn't get around to last time. And obviously, we're going to tackle them over the course of many episodes.

But there are so many that I figured that we could actually open this up. I know you guys just came back from a nice trip to New York, working hard. Working hard. The land of the Big Apple. Yes, the Big Apple land. and so I figured we could go over some of these questions just to chat. I'd also like to say,

well, I'd probably say what happened to New York. I'll tell you what, we'll do a whole good podcast on that. A whole one about New York? A whole different one, not this one. So get your fuck, stop smile, you idiot. I'd like to say,

Hey, what a wonderful time today. This guy's a joke. And everyone's really, hey. Now hold up. And fuck my brother. You know what? You can sometimes. Today I'm not even having this

What makes it perfect is The Batman T-shirt And then the blanket over your crotch You can't fucking fight it's perfect I like my blankie He's talking about too And he's sucking on the corner of his blankie It's cute

Listen Everyone needs a blankie They do You know what I actually When I was a kid I had a blankie But now I have a pillow That I have It's the only pillow I can sleep on

It's the hentai one It's not the hentai one But it is what I was I use, like I smell it when I'm jacking off. Really? Like, I don't know what it is about the smell of it, but I know when, like, sometimes... Maybe your drool, like, smells like hot women. Maybe. It does. It makes me horny.

Either way. That or the... My scalp dandruff makes me... Okay, so, Evolution Not Work. Mix bits on his dick to jerk off. Then he sleeps on his drooly pillow and gets horny. Oh, yeah. It's evolution. That's absolutely... I could see that. It's a kind of happening. That or my own semen makes me horny because my whole bed is just covered in it. All right. Uh, yeah.

So, I just wanted to hit up some of these questions. I figured there would be good kind of topics that we can roll through. Yes. One of these questions is from, should I say, Make a Wish Foundation. Yeah. What's wrong with that? No, it's fun. I just want to.

You want to start with that one? Yeah. Okay. Here you go. Okay. Did I ever tell you about Make a Wish? I was a Make a Wish kid. Yeah.

I almost died. I swear. When I was a kid, I was a Make a Wish kid. Were you really? Yeah, I got humonia and almost died. What? Chris, are you being serious? Yes.

I was making wishkin. What did you say? Like, you psycho? Pinoonia. Livonia. Why did you say, humonia? Pinyonia. That's what they say in Ireland.

So, what, did you get to see Spider-Man? No, or something? They're like, if you can wish for anything in the world, what do you wish for? I was like, I want to see Action Man. And they got this normal-looking builder in. You just got some construction work and walk in and cough on you? Yeah. He was like, I'm actually, I'm actually half drunk.

I was like, no, you're not. You're no greatest hero of them all. I'm actually lying. Oh, I'm cutting that. I'm keeping your Make-A-Wish shit. I want to see how good I could act. You were great. I believe you.

Thank you. But the real first question is... Sorry for wasting your time. From Make-A-Wish, what does Make-A-Wish ask? He says, will my cancer go away? You know, that's an interesting question. It's not a good wish. What do you think?

I'm not a doctor, kid, but... I talk to the doc. You're gonna die, dude. But you know something? At least you have this podcast. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Yeah.

And he got his shout out too. Yeah, you got your shout out. Do you remember his name though? Death boy. I knew a woman who had cancer and she went to the doctor and he injected medicine into her arm. She got better. Yeah, you know, cancer's a weird thing. No.

What could he eject, Chris? Medicine. What kind? His penis? It was the plus sign. The plus sign? Yeah, the medicine sign. That's HIV positive, Chris.

Oh, fuck. The AIDS keys. Cancel, not the cancer. Oh no. That's how they did it. I think that's actually, I think that's a true way of getting rid of something. It is not. It is. No, it is. If you have cancer, you get cancer. No, it was cancer. I read that. I did. That's the secret cure to HIV or cancers to get HIV. There was something. It's a gamble. I'm not willing to take. There was a thing where it was like, you're just doubling down your bets at this point. I think someone cured. Someone either cured AIDS or cancer by injecting something bad into them to cancel it out. And then they cure the other thing too. Well, with cancer for sure, radioactive treatment is already pretty bad. It, like, destroys your immune system.

It Fs with your bones. I thought if you, like, walk into Chernobyl, you get more cancer. That's true. Or you get superpowers. So, do they find a way to make radiation minus cancer? Healthy radiation. Yeah, healthy. Basically, if you get cancer, your options are pretty much definitely die of cancer or maybe die of chemotherapy.

If that's the case, then why don't they put a big... Because most people who get cancer, who get cancer, you know, cancer, die of chemotherapy. They don't die of the actual cancer. Really? Yeah. But your options are, like I said, definitely die of cancer or maybe die of chemotherapy. Oh. Yeah. So which one do you choose? I choose the healthy option. Like Steve Jobs. Actually, you know what's funny about that is that a lot of people do say, like in order to fight cancer, like they do these holistic things where you just jog more and do yoga and listen to Kenny G and eat vegetables and shit. I think the issue comes to when people try to do that only like Steve Jobs did.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he didn't even do that. I thought he just ate apples until we died. He literally did. Yeah, he was... He's like, I have cancer. I'm going to eat apples. No, are you kidding?

No. The creator of the Apple computer only ate apples? The most ironic death that you could have. That is the silliest thing is that in order to combat cancer... To my knowledge, the doctors, and if I fuck up on this, he loved himself so much. But the doctors came to a pretty, like...

He had procured cancer, which is pretty much a death sentence, but they came early enough to where they were like... We got some treatment options. We could do surgery. We could do treatment options. And he basically said, fuck you. And it leaves off the trees. And then he died.

And then he took a buy of an apple, and then he set it on the table. And it was the perfect silhouette of their logo. By the way, he didn't invent the Apple computer. Wait. Did he? Yeah. I thought he just revolutionized it. No, I think he did create it.

Okay, that's fair. I'm pretty sure he did. I was getting ready for an onslaught. Like murdering people running at me saying that I got it wrong. Did he make Pixar or did he just help fun? Yeah, I did get a stake in it. I don't think he made it. So, make a wish, Death Boy 69 No Scope got his question asked.

Now we've got a question from, oh, here we go. One from Curtis R. Not, aka Takahata 101. Oh, I'm going to skip this one. Shut up. That put a bad fucking taste in my mouth. Something's just pissed me off and that's one of them. You know what? Your username is Psychic Pebble.

Say his name again. I want everyone to hear this fucking. We all got shitty username. Don't say it again, his name or his username. His username. His username. You know what I...

Takahata. Zach is the best. Okay, that's a little bit better. Okay, read the question. The question is, best era of music. But we're only given, hold on,

we're only given five options. Okay. So you can't go any far back then. 60s, 70s, 80s, 80s, or modern. Which is like, you can't say,

Bach, you can't say anything back in the day. Wait, so is, it's not, did it go with 90s modern or 90s 2000s? No, 90s and modern. So that's, well, modern. That's like 15 years, though, from... Well, I'm going to make the assumption that it's from... All right, we should preface this

with music is subjective, it's everyone's taste. Dude, Tumblr isn't watching our partners. I know, I'm just saying, because I posted my music playlist to Twitter and people were like, fuck you. You see... No, they did it. I did. I was even a little bit surprised. People get furious over musical choices.

Do they really? Be furious. I think people, I think the most slabs you get on music snobs, people who don't like your taste of music. Oh, you listen to this? I hate talking to people about music, because I'm always walking on eggshells. What about you? Do you feel like you have very strong opinions about... No. I think music is the most subjective thing out of anything. Because it's just, do you know what music is? It's just like frequencies. Yeah. It's just frequencies you like to hear.

Yeah. So if you're like whatever instruments you can get to make those frequencies Like it's not like you can walk up to someone say oh I fucking hate the bamboo flutes like why I hate the sound of it well okay you can't blame them because maybe don't like it But then it's like it's just depends on what kind of instruments what kind of genre is and shit There's just no way to say if it's actually good or not Yeah and it's also like I think also what you're used to too I mean I think subjective is the perfect word mainly because I mean all are subjective but but I think what sounds you're used to are the sound like you'll never get like most of

India to like music that's not Eddie A.mayor. Yeah, exactly. Like, they love that shit. Holy fuck, no, I'm just saying, like, I'm not saying that's bad. You pissed off on the viewer. No, but like for them, they love that, and you know what, the Chinese opera and shit? Yeah. It's like,

Ha, shing-dong, point, you know, like, they've got their own, like, fucking, they've got their own thing, and I'm sure there's people sitting back being like, oh, yeah, this is my this is my idea. I wasn't trying to, look, I wasn't trying to, like, irismith or something.

I was trying to be racist. Just hear me out, oh, I was not trying to be racist. Okay. They've got different scales. They've got different ways that music works than we do. And I don't get it. And smaller brains, too, you think?

Smaller brains, smaller faces on smaller heads. There's small, they're small humanoids. They're smaller primates. Anyways. But what I'm saying is, yeah, like, everything, like, if we grew up there, we'd probably love that shit. Yeah, but it's weird because, like, the words I bring that up is because I listen to older stuff. Yeah.

I don't really like. A lot of modern stuff, but I don't think it's because I'm not, I get labeled somebody who's like, what, you think music today sucks? It's like, no. I just like older music. Some people attack me for like the older music because they're saying, I think I do think music today kind of sucks, to be honest.

Yeah, like, I'm sorry. Like that Anaconda ain't got none unless you got buns, huh, and that kind of stuff. Since her mix a lot and I have to enjoy it because he's from Seattle. Every once in a while I'm on the radio and like, here, look like, no, no, I meant the Mickey Minaj remake of it. Oh, she made a remake of it?

Yeah, that's the thing. She just took his music that it was already good and she made it worse. I think the only thing I would say for music, I think she's a decent hip-hop artist, but I don't like it when they do that so much when they take other shit. I don't like sampling. But I was about to say, I think music is kind of nostalgic for everybody. No, I disagree, though, because I didn't have a taste of music until I was like...

Well, that's fine. 17 or 19, maybe 19 even. I think nostalgia is a part of it, but I do think that, like, there's a lot of people that later on get into things like 80s rock or... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, your taste will change, though. Yeah, absolutely. If you hear a song from your childhood, you're not going to go, I hate this.

Oh, no, definitely. If your dad was singing songs, you're like, yeah. Whenever I hear like a shitty, cheesy, nighties song, look out. And it kind of makes sense, though, with music especially, because not only is it accessible, but so many artists today, I feel, are influenced by past artists. Yeah, certainly. That if you like something, that there's a very good chance, if you back trace it, you're going to find, like, the roots of some of their music.

And you're going to be like, oh, shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is why they got inspired to make shit. This is what, you know, it came from. But see, I feel like, too, like you said, like, it's a nostalgic thing. It's a little bit of a nostalgic thing. Like, if I was 50 years old and heard, like, this smash-vounce song, it would be like, what the fuck is this? I'm like, I only heard so much music when I was a kid.

Yeah. Right. You have to discover new music, too. So, to answer the question of the roundabout way, I, I personally really like 80's music. I like the way it sounds. It's that nice period for me. It's a nice, like, transitional period where it's kind of sybty and, like, that weird techno-y stuff. They got their pads.

They got their scenes. Yeah, but it's not too. They got their dumb stuff, or something that kind of really, really, it's a little. Techno-y kind of stuff. It's that nice kind of like weird, cheesy. I don't know. I like the aesthetic. But I didn't really live through the 80s.

I wasn't alive. Yeah, I was. But so I have no biased towards it. It's like I was nostalgic for it. I just, I grew to like that kind of stuff when I was older. You know, it's kind of funny because I grew up in the 80s, but one of my favorite generations of music over time. Because during the 90s, we had like the alternative breakout.

with like Nirvana and the Sound Garden and all, you know, all sorts of shit. And that was what I listened to. However, as I've gotten older, I still love a lot of that stuff. But the 70s actually became something that I really got into with like Led Zeppelin. And even though the doors are kind of out the door at the time and listening back, I'm not so much into the doors, but like there were plenty of bands in the 70s that I feel like influenced that 80s sound. That's the thing, too, it's kind of, it's obvious thing you say, but it's really fun to kind of go back from songs I listen to you like it extends for like the 60s up until like the 80s or 90s

yeah it's fun it's just kind of slowly see it progress I've always enjoyed that what would people call Frank Sinatra's music would that be 60s yeah it's 40s 50s 60s I think you can I mean he was around for so long that it's kind of I guess you yeah you could people think the heyday of that was 50s probably yeah 50s yeah yeah that makes sense I just think it's cool that you can find something good in all music yeah like like if you listen to a like a weird creepy you song from the forest you You can still find something good. Absolutely.

I love, there's a lot of like Aboriginal, like, tribal stuff that I love. There's a lot of, like, uh, Renaissance music that I actually enjoy. I've really enjoyed. Gregorian chants. For some reason, I don't know why, and I think it's because I don't know if I've produced or whatever, but I watched a lot of documentaries, but for some reason, Soviet music is really appealing just because it's a guy, it's really, really appealing. Really?

It's a huge choir of Guy C. I don't know why. This is madly. the Red Army Choir, I mean. Would you want to be a part of that? Fuck, no. I would never want to live there, but I just say, it's really fascinating. Would you like to sing with them?

There's no way. I can't sing by myself. Would you, if you had a choice between hiring a deaf leopard cover band or a bunch of Russian dudes to sing at your party, what would you do? I feel like you get away more cool stuff with the second one. With the line, I think. Don't you? With the record choir.

That's true. With the belly. Fucking, what was it going to say? I was going to say, it's cool that you can have like an artist write a song and it's good, but then someone in the future will make it way better. Yeah. Like, you ever hear the original version of that? Yeah.

It's like, Oh, Rado. Oh, my own. And the new one's nice. But, I, to close what I don't, I wouldn't,

I feel like, I don't even feel like, can say music today is bad or worse? I don't think I can say that. No. I think there's always been bad music. I always think there's always been bad movies. I always think there's always been bad literature. But we just were the good stuff. But I would say, the only thing I would say, objectively, of a music today that could be

considered worse is, I feel like 30 or 40 years ago, yeah, there's no way to cheat the system. Right. You could be a bad scene that would still be popular. Yeah. That's the only thing that is different today. And that's why I would say that today more than any other time. I mean, boy bands started well. But it's good at all right.

Because anybody can be big. Right. You can be big now. I really don't like that pop music mentality where you'll go into a club and they'll be playing all the music that just came out. And in a month, it's just forgotten forever. It's just weird. It's always kind of culty in a way. It is a little bit.

I never thought of it that way. It's weird. But it is like programming. Like, you know, you listen to it in your car and I'll go to the club. Listen to it again. Yeah. And it's like a re- it's like a remixed version of it, but it's still the message and it's still the same like basic principles of the song. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. So I would say it's the big difference today. Yeah, I mean, there's still, I mean, like, you're, you're right though in the, every generation has its pros and its cons. And I'm just playing a good music coming out now, too. Whenever I listen to the radio, there's always a bit of a nice song. But, you know, but I would go to my way to listen to it. Radio is just so hard, though. Radio is, to me, it's like, not only is it a dying medium to a degree, to a degree, I mean, relatively it is.

It's a shifting, what I'd say. It's shifting is something else. It's more vaguely. But the radio has a problem, and the problem stems from how the model works and where they play shit until you hate it. Yeah. Yeah. Like, they'll take a good song. You'd be like, yeah, I like this song. Two days later. Okay, shut the fuck up.

Like, can I hear something else, please. I can't drive yet, and I don't have a radio song. I don't have to deal with that yet. You would, what's like in a car? I have sound clock Right in my car I remember Well that's good

When I remember in high school When I used to I used to drive to high school My drive was a little longer Because we had to move Out of district or whatever But I still went to that school Through some weird loophole

So it was like a 50, 20 minute a drive Every day I would listen to the fucking radio For 20 minutes And I'd hear the same songs On every station Which is fine I think it's like

Why the TV model doesn't work Because on a radio Whatever is there You have to listen to do it even if you don't want to. It's like TV. It's like, oh, I can either watch, I can watch Govue until 7 o'clock and wait until my shows on or go to Netflix.

Yeah. So, I feel like more people use their cell phones with the Luxorica cable now. That's exactly. Yeah. Then use the radio, really. Yeah. Do you think pop music's more like cater towards girls? So girls are more into the music. No, I would say girls. I would say the younger audience in general. But like, I don't remember dudes listening to that stuff when I was down there. It's actually really, I'm thinking about it now.

In terms of pop music, you think about all the pop stars that are like really big right now. You've got like people like Maroon 5 or Taylor Swift or whatever. It does really seem more oriented towards the girls. I would say it's like 75% girls. I think it's because they realized.

I don't know. I feel like that probably changed like the 80s or 90s. Well here. Hold on. Name a pop star today that you think has more of a male fan base. I don't know.

I don't really know what kind of pop stars are what I hate to say. I don't really. Yeah. Because I feel like back when you had like Michael Jackson and stuff. I was probably for Michael Jackson. But I feel like there was plenty of guys and girls that really liked him. But I'm trying to think now.

But like a lot of his songs weren't just about love and like fucking girls. Yeah, they were about love. They weren't really about, I don't know. I feel like it's the core of most songs because that's like the most human thing ever is about love. It's the easiest thing to write about it, which is why he's been really about so much. Yeah. Yeah. It's like my movies have it too.

almost every movie has a fucking love at your story because it's relatable or whatever you can just easy you can just do it everybody gets that but it's risky to write a fucking song about Tupperware

I don't know you know it's hard to save things you could do a really good song about Tupperware I'm sure or a really good movie

about forks but you know you can do something weird but it's hard it's way harder to do that Brave little toaster made a good movie yeah there you go

that's true that's true so what do you think Chris if you had to choose doing 60, 70, 80, 90, or modern, what would you choose? I'm the worst person to ask.

You have to choose one. The guy asked the question, you fucker. The most, let's see. Appeal to you. Best era. Look, that's the thing, right? I don't listen to any of this music. I like game.

I'm weird. Listen to me. I like game soundtracks. What's your favorite music? What's your favorite music? I like game soundtracks. I like catchy songs. But that's the thing, right?

If I was to actually say which is the best, even though I've got no interest. What's your favorite then? What's your favorite game or movie soundtrack? What decade produced the most interesting best soundtracks for you? I like the Back to the Future soundtrack. That was 85. Roble Cup.

Whatup Cup was great soundtrack. That's true. It's all 80s too. They're not asking that. Okay, so which decade had the best music? I would say the most, what's the word, timeless? Probably the 70s. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, I think a lot of stuff was rooted in. in that? The 70s and 80s, I would say it's a tie. Well, you... I said 80s before. I still think 80s... You just threw tie in there

just kind of off the cuff. Like, like I said, I think it's hard to you through the 60s and... I would prefer music from the 80s, but I would say that the 70s... The 80s definitely has a feel to it. You know what you're listening to?

Yeah. If some 70s, you could go... What else depends on genre too? You know what? Fuck it. I'm an idiot. I don't know. I'm gonna bully... We're all idiots.

That was the whole point. This is the most subjective shit ever. It's true. So, here's another question. Phil Sutfin. And he, this is actually kind of a long one. I'll try to blaze through it. Okay.

What's it like going to a con as an e-celebrity? For example. Okay. I remember Chris. The Chris, Oni N-G, right here. This guy right here? This very room. Picking his nose?

I remember picking his nose. Yeah. In a Batman shirt. Dude. I remember Chris telling a story in a stream about a surreal moment at a con. Oh, yeah. He said that someone in an elevator full. of people. I was there. I was there. Zach was apparently there shouted

only cartoons! Yay! No, no, no, it wasn't like that. It was weird. It was weirder than that. It was way weird. Me and Zach stepped into the elevator. We were like... You're the back of it, though. We were just crushed against the back. It was full of like 30 people. And the door's closed. And then somebody was just like, oh, when is like Chris O'Neill's panel on? And I was like, wait, what? And then someone was like, only cartoons, yeah. And then like two other guys said, only cartoons, yeah. And I was just like, what the fuck? And then I stood out of the elevator and me and Zay and looked back into the elevator and everyone was looking at me but no one knew who I was. And then the doors closed and I was like,

what the fuck? A bunch of people started saying it as well, but none of them seemed to know that only was actually there. Yeah. It was a really odd experience. I don't know why it was so weird. That sounds very bizarre. That sounds like a scene from a movie that is kind of like, you know, the slice of life of like YouTube animators or something. like that almost you're like the mall rats of like animators you're in an elevator of people like you know using your catchphrase and then you stand in front of all of them and not a single one of them even knows who the fuck

you are what I think might have happened was I stepped in and some guy might have been like was that blah blah nah never mind but then he asked the question you know right but so the question is what's like we do a convention yeah oh it's you know for people like Chris and I it's not really a big deal we don't really get I preferred it like a few years ago when it was fresh And also, we were a little bit smaller back then, so it was a little less overwhelming. When you see the actual, like, the actual internet celebrities, like, dealing with people, oh, my God. I ever, you know.

Like the face people. Yeah, like, like John. Yeah. John Tron. Yeah. It's kind of hard to talk about. Whenever we go to convention with him, good Lord is he swore. What's really creepy, this is incredibly unsettling to me.

It says fucking shivers on my spine. People dressed up as John. the last next I went to And so I was but I kept I kept thinking I was like he was like we turned out It was just some fat lesbian I was like oh god I'm not John

Maybe it was John No it wasn't John But um I was gonna goate Not yet But anyways But I was like what the fuck It happened like four times

Then it kept humiliating The more it happened There were four lesbians dressed as John Ron And probably two lesbians And two just fat guys There's like a weird sad truth to it Where

do you want people come to your panel because that's why you go is for you to see people at your panel but then if someone comes up to you at any time other than your panel you're like should have come to the panel yeah but then

if there's people stopping you for a photo every minute it's kind of annoying yeah yeah I feel like in a perfect world we had all the time in the world and you had nothing to do yeah it would be great to like take photos and sign autographs have a five minute chat with everybody you know like it would be great but I could imagine

that once it happens too much it's just like, oh wow. I've gotten to the point where if I continue to do what I do, it will get to the point where it's going to be annoying, you know? Right, but what's funny, though, is from the other perspective, none of the, or not none,

but a lot of these people don't know what that experience is. So for them, every time they meet you, it is the first time. It is like so fresh for them. For you, it's like, dude. And it's not like you can't relate. Well, because I think when you say, no way,

that they're approaching you. No, no, no, no, it's great. No, it's awesome that they're approaching you. But it's annoying when they stop you when you're in the middle of something or if you're eating dinner or something. I think me a picture and you're like, dude, I look like shit. I've been walking around for like six hours. That's the one aspect. I mean, it's probably something weird to it.

I don't know, it's not something to have a perspective because we're just, it's also hard to not sound like a douche from talking about this kind of stuff. Yeah. Well, no. We're not celebrities. We're just real about it. Some people notice who we are sometimes. Yeah. And luckily, not me that much, but I'm paranoid.

Yeah. It's like, oh. I remember John, we were in New York John got seriously recognized multiple times a day Yeah And it's like he The guy couldn't just go out and get a carton milk or something You could get in a water till you couldn't walk in his butt

You know, not boxes but his fucking pajama pants Yeah He had to look picture quality Every time he went out And it's like, dude Because of that Because people would snap of If you didn't consent to a photo

They'd take it anyway Yeah that's the worst He had to put Jack on his fucking shoulder Every day walk around the city He had to walk to his theme chune You had to carry boombox It was fucked up Wait what?

No, it's not true. I was like, the bootbox? With like sunglasses on. Yeah, but, I mean, from my perspective, too, I've said before, the podcast I've said before just other places, I don't like those encounters, not because I don't like the encounters of songs, but I're like what's behind them.

I hate the idea of celebrity, like of celebrities and being a celebrity. I'm not a celebrity, but saying I hate the idea of it. I really, really, really don't like, the idea of pictures. I don't like the idea of autographs. Because it's me confirming that I'm worth an autograph for a picture. Yeah, but...

That's my perspective. To people... Okay, so there's celebrity culture and then there's just someone who genuinely looks up to you as an artist. I get that, but I guess I have a weird, skewed perspective because if I saw Larry David or somebody, I would never look like, hey, I'd never ask anybody for a picture ever.

And that's just me. If I ever met somebody I'd like, I'd be like, oh, I try to treat them like a person. Even if my heart was videos and go, God, is this person? Yeah. And that's just a human reaction. I would still... But that's just me... We were hanging out at MagFest together a lot and a couple of them.

And I'm curious, now that you mentioned, because I know, like, your thing with photos, were you asked to get photos a lot? A couple people asked me before. And then what did you say? I said, I'm sorry. I really don't like doing that. But I can do anything else for you. I can...

Suck your dick. Like, yeah, I can suck your balls. We're not original, Mac. Me and you. But, no, I just... I don't like the idea of that. Because it confirms that I Like, oh yeah, I'm worth an autograph

Or I'm worth the fucking picture I But see, do you do You do to make that judgment for them now? Because what you're doing in that In that moment though What I'm saying is I'm not saying

I'm not trying to deprive anybody Of anything I'm just saying You got the wrong idea Your image of me is not what you think it is You feel guilty kind of But you can't tell somebody If I sat down with lunch with somebody

and they'd expect me to be off the walls I'd be like, yeah, so I was listening to NPR earlier. Expectation is different than what people feel when they... I get, look. My perspective is if people like my work, that's great. That's what I want.

I want people to appreciate my work. But the guy behind it is a boring fucking guy. Don't do the thing. I'm an average guy, and I say that seriously, and I don't know it's obvious, but people really, really think, I'm off the walls and it's like, no, I have a fucking Bored.

But what if they want your autograph because of the body of work you've done and the joy you've brought to them? And not because you're so crazy off the wall. No, but people, some people, people do it because they idolize. I understand. There's like another, like, aspect to it where I get really, like, guilty feeling when someone comes up to me and says, I'm a really huge fan of this cartoon that I personally hate it now because, like, do you ever make a cartoon? You grow so far from it. You're like, I fucking hate this.

I hated dot, dot, dot about a month after I made it. Right. So it was like to you and say. It was literally what Tom Folt would introduce me to people as you. He was like, this is the dot, dot, dot, dot guy. And I was like, Tom. So if people come up to you and say, I love dat, da, dot, dot. You're like, that was the first thing John said to me at Mattress.

Yeah. He was like, oh, oh, man, yeah, you made dot, dot, dot. I love dot, dot, dot. So you just feel bad kind of. You feel kind of guilty because you've gone out of it and you're like, you can't escape it, you know? Yeah, that's what I mean. It's like, that people go, oh, what do you try to hide it? It's like, I've not tried the hide anything.

Yeah. I've already been out there. People don't know my phone name. It's not like I'm trying to hide anything. I just, I don't like the idea of it. I don't like the idea because I'm not fucking, it's not even that I'm not worthy, but I'm not. But it's like, I just, I think it's pointless.

If you want to appreciate anything, if you want to say anything, do it about my work. I, I am not a celebrity. I'm not a goofy off-the-wall guy. What I make is what I want to be out there. I don't want to be the spotlight because I don't deserve to be spotlight. But do you feel like you've put, fine. I think that there's a distinction, though,

between those people who feel like there's celebrity, therefore they propagate that image and they promote it. But I do think as far as the effort that has gone into avoiding that. It's not effort. No, it's the opposite. It's a lack of effort to do the other thing. I've never made an effort not to do that. I've made an effort to not.

Basically what I'm saying is I've never made an effort to not put myself out there. I just never put an effort to put myself out there. It's a lack of effort. Okay. A lot of people will go, I want to be that face. People walk down the street and they go, oh, it's you. Right. I don't want a face to my thing.

I want my work. Everything should be different. I'm a guy who practice something and maybe I'll get better on it someday, but then that's it. I practice that. That's all it is. I just do stuff. And I'm not purposely being humble. I really, really, really hate the idea of idolizing people behind the work.

I really don't like it. So it's not about you putting an effort not to put yourself out there. Right. I'm not consciously going to hear it. Right. So, like, if a camera was on you, it's not like you wouldn't take the effort to walk away from the camera or put, like, a mask on. I'm not going to screw it all the way. I went to a panel for God's sake.

I was like, oh, yeah, I feel like doing it. Well, you went to one of them. Yeah, but I also go back if I see the pen at all. But I was going to say, so. Maybe I'm not with the wrong then. What are they going to think you're wrong? No. That's just my perspective.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. That's the reason I don't like it. I've been to so many fucking parties where someone like ignores me like these snobby

Hollywood fucking Okay, that's a good point But you know what they ignore you because they don't know what you look like Exactly Because you keep hiding what you look like You know that's my point Barber Streisand effect Zach's saying that you can see the true person

If they don't know who you were first This is my point I've been to so many places Where I've been a so cool people talking And they're like Yeah I was I would do this I just sit in there like I say something you know

They're like they look at me Look away And after like an hour to the conversation Somebody walks and they're like Oh this is uh you know he did this and this and immediately these ass kissers. That's why I don't like it. And it makes everyone see, I want people to see me who, I want to be a regular person who's treated like a real person.

I hate the fucking thing of like, oh, you make this, you get these leeches, these fucking bottom feeders. I hate that. So here's an interesting parallel. I would be able to treat me right because I'm being a fucking, he would be. An interesting parallel is when I was 15, I was very overweight. I was very overweight for my entire youth. and then I over a course of a summer

I did a lot of unhealthy things and I lost a stupid amount of weight I went to the hospital because my immune system basically shut down and they fed me interveniously through my knuckle for about a week and a half and I lost a ton of weight and then when I was in the hospital I lost even more weight because I was just being fed like NACL

what is the sodium? Gatorade. They were just feeding me fucking gatoried. But then when I got out Yeah. Because this was international school, this was in Malaysia, there wasn't a whole lot of people. It was a pretty small circle of people. Yeah.

But the exact same people that I remember making fun of me while I was drawing in my sketchbook I had headphones on, but I was switching tracks, like, you know, bouncing through tracks. So there was a dead space in my tracks. I could hear them talking about me. Like while I was. And these were my quote unquote friends. Like these were the people, but I mean, they were, it wasn't friendly banter. Because you were the fat kid. So, fuck me.

I was. I was like, yeah, I was the fat kid of the group, I guess. So they always needed like a thing, I guess. But I didn't know that was a case because I never heard it to my face. You know, you always kind of felt things. So anyways, but I got back. And after a number of unhealthy choices, I had lost a lot of weight. And, you know, this is when you're 16, so like, you know, 16-15 period where your puberty is really hitting.

So you grow and you change. You got a big dick. I have a big dick, so that helps. Okay, wait. Let me mind. So anyways, what ended up happening was all of them all of a sudden liked me. Yeah. I was a sophomore. I dated a senior and all of a sudden, like within several groups, I was in a heavy metal band all of a sudden. I was like, I was a lead of a couple of plays and things that we did. My circle of friends was awesome. I did really like them. In retrospect, they were great people. However, there were so many people that I wanted to be my friend that I realized after I'd lost the weight, they wanted to be my friend, I hated everybody. I couldn't trust anybody. Then I went to Japan.

after Malaysia, hated everybody. Anyone who liked me... Well, no, a lot of more international. And when I went back to Seattle, after that, hated everybody. And when I say hate, that's a bad word. It was, I was always suspicious. I could never look at anyone and think,

you actually like me. Because of the transition and how quickly it happened, I distrusted everyone. Because I was like, if you saw me two years ago, if you saw me three years ago, you would be fucking making fun of me right now.

You would not be my friend. And I saw, I dated girls. that's what I thought. I went out to parties with people. That's what I thought. I was invited to shit. That's what I thought.

I had this disdain for everybody. That's actually a big reason why I'm like as nice quote unquote as I am. At least I try to be positive and everything is because I spent a huge chunk of my life. Like the most, you know, like as far as like parties and friends and all that between 15 and 22, you know, that's like kind of like a big like high school to college kind of party time where I just looked at everybody with. this second eye or this third eye of just staying. Because my eyes are so small they only count as half. So you have to combine them to create one.

So my second eye. But yeah, so when you were saying that about going to a party and hearing what people think about it. That feeling in your stomach, that fucking fire you feel when you're like, I know you're disingenuous and you're a fucking snake. That is, I've experienced it several times where people flatter to ignore me

at these pollies of, or fucking parties, where people congregate of like, you know, other quote-unquote e-celebrities, maybe even higher up people than that, and you just get them, it's like, oh, what did you do? You get this snobby fucking dead look at the eyes,

and you really have to be like, I made this, and they're like, oh, oh, oh, immediately these fucking worms. I don't know, it really makes me sick. So that's another reason, too. It's like, let's see if you really are. I think it's so much more exciting to, like, become friends with somebody,

like over drinks and stuff. And then while you're talking, then all of a sudden they're like, oh, yeah, and I do this thing. You're like, oh, yeah, they drop a name of a project. Like, wait, what? Yeah, exactly. And you guys are already hitting it off.

That's like, oh, that's awesome. That's fine. Look, I've met people who have been like that with. Most of you guys ever have been that. I've met people who have been great who didn't know who I was and truth me nicely. And then I told them who, you know, we exchanged, oh, you did this. Yeah, that's cool. That's good.

But I'm saying, I've experienced so many times. I seriously remember one instance where I was flattered ignored in a group of talking. Yeah. And they were just like, those gis snobs. Because they were talking about pitching shows. Yeah. And I was like, you know, I did that. So I'll pitch him.

throw your two cents in. Yeah, and they ignored you while you said it. I think I had more than two cents in the situation because what they haven't pitched they hadn't pitched yet. So I was like, oh, this is my experience. And they're like, oh, yeah, yeah. And then one of the people,

the host of the party walked over was like, oh yeah, this is Zach. He made a hellbengers and this and that. Oh, you made no. I was like, I never felt more dirty than that time. And immediately they all focus. Good day, sir. While we're on the subject of this question,

can I just say one thing? Yeah, of course. I didn't get a chance to earlier. You know what I was saying that if you, like, you know, you reach a certain point of internet celebrityism, where people will come up to you. I didn't mean to say it like, it's annoying if you do that. It depends on the situation, I guess. Like, so say John, for instance. I think the interaction is important.

So, for example, we saw two guys who stopped over like, hey, can I get a picture with you? And that stuff is fine. But the one guy at the coffee shop, it was the coolest interaction that ever saved my life. Guy at a coffee shop we were leaving. The guy was like, oh, hey, John, I saw your bumper video. great stuff and he shook his hand and he's like thanks he walked away, that was it. I was like, that guy is fucking cool. And I remember that guy way more than

anybody else. Because I mean, I would just say this. If you see somebody you look up to, just remember they probably get stopped every day, multiple times a day, and just be conscious of that, just appreciate that. They're not big, they're not big dicks because imagine you're trying

to go, imagine all the stress everybody listening has written out of their head. Oh, it's good work, I have to pay this bill, I have to go, all this co-workers being a dick, oh man, my dad has cancer, whatever. And imagine you're being stopped constantly. You have to be... I didn't expect you to talk about John's dad's cancer.

It was a slim. No, but seriously. So I was not to say it's unappreciated. Wait, John's dad doesn't have cancer. Go on. It's not... I would say it's pestering. I would just say be conscious of what that person is going with. Everything in their head they're dealing with, plus you interacting with them.

And it's not to say they're annoyed by you or they don't appreciate it. I didn't mean to say it like that. No, and I think... actually what Chris was saying is kind of right though as far as like it's not yeah you know like as far as like the whole annoying thing I do think it's not so much annoyance it's just more about what's a tactful way sure to approach exactly if you if you want to interact with somebody that you like it's fine but if they're eating you walk up where they have spaghetti or they're taking a piss or they're yeah yeah yeah yeah it's just a be appropriate I would say

that's the way I've been eating I think that's the one that you should bother somebody yeah that's just fucking bullshit don't bother somebody yeah Wait until they pay the bill or something. On the way, I would say, hey, I like you, well, can shake their hand. That's it. That's what you got to do. Yeah. In New York, there was occasionally you'll see celebrities walking around.

And that was always kind of my thing, too. I was never an autograph guy. But if I ever saw them, if I saw them in the corner and I knew it was them. And, like, they'll make, like, you know, they're trying not to make eye contact. But as soon as they kind of do, kind of, I'm like, oh, shit. So I'd just be like, love your stuff? Yep. Exactly.

In the back of my head, I was like, if I ever be, anybody ever look up to me, was going to say, you know, hey. Yeah. I mean, I've always like people coming up to me like It's always like cool. It's just the way It happens that kind of shows what It's not the act of you approaching It's how that's handles. Yeah. That's all I would say to clarify all of it.

Yeah. Anyway, good question. Yeah. Next We've got Ben Van Camp. He asks, I'm very curious about what your answers are going to be. You might have to think about it. What's the worst gift you've ever gotten? Oh my god, I know it off the bat.

Ooh, that's a good question. Oh, actually shit. He said the worst gifts you've ever given. I want to know, well, let's do both. Let's do both. I'm curious. Okay, worst gift I ever got from my aunt on Christmas Day from my dad's pound shop that he owns. It was a one pound toy from my dad's pound shop.

How old are you? Like what? I don't know, six. Oh, wait. She was working there. So she got her for free. And they gave it to you even though you probably had all of them if you even wanted them. I didn't want it because it was like for me.

a pound shop. My dad owned. I know the worst gift I ever gave. I was like seven or eight and I stole my dad's six pack out of the fridge like two months before his birthday. How old were you? Like seven? Probably seven or seven or seven?

Zach, shouldn't have done that. No, no. I said this one. I stole the six pack. Fuck you. I sold the six pack and then wrapped it up and like two weeks later I gave it back to him. He was like, oh, it's wondering where this went. For that point he was fucking moldy. I was an idiot. Real brat

Beer I was giving his own beer That's a better gift Of course you'd suspect This fucking 70-year-old Slebert gave you Oh my goodness What was the worst gift for you or got

You know It sounds like a lot But I don't think I've really I've really ever got a bad gift before I mean obviously it's like Whenever you go to your To your family's house or something They give you like socks with your kid

It's always kind of late But that's not what everybody gets I don't know I don't know I guess it I'll pass. I don't have a good answer. Yeah. Um, hmm,

I don't know, pass. No. Oh, alright. Let's assume that the truth is just so dark that it can't be shown into the light of day. Look, I gave someone eyes. I don't know. Oh, no.

So as far as the worst gift I ever got, um, I don't know if it's the, I'm pretty thankful for everything I've gotten. I guess the worst one was, um, somebody got me. when I was a kid.

So when I was seven years, I never met my, I met my dad once when I was a kid when I was seven years old. But he left when I was like one years old. And I guess I got two worst gifts and they were actually both from him. And this isn't like a vindictive thing. I actually couldn't give a fuck about him.

I don't know where he is. I don't know what's up with him or anything. How old would he be now? He's alive? Oh yeah, he's definitely alive. I'm pretty sure he's alive. He would be about the same age. is my mom. They met in high school, I think, in Taiwan. Yeah, they were a young couple.

Anyways, so I got, I was seven years old and my biological father stopped by. He already had a new daughter, Ashley, who was like just a few years younger than me. We went out, I think we went to Seattle Center. I can't remember the day very well. And he brought his other woman or wife or whatever she was at the time. And when we got back, it was for my birthday. And then when we got back, he gave me a present.

And it was trivial pursuit. Now, I don't know if you guys are familiar. Every seven-year-old's dream. First of all, I can barely fucking read, let alone play trivial pursuit, which was given to me in the early 80s. Now, you got to remember, trivial

pursuits based on, like, factual information throughout. So I don't know who the prime minister of the, you know, previous Soviet Union is, I don't know who the World Series top batting average guy was in 1964.

I bet you he fucking dug through his closet and fact that was like a re-gift. Yeah, that's exactly what happened. But there was like, I could barely read. I remember honestly, as far as for people in pursuit, what I did with that mostly was chew on the pieces. Because there was like the little like little pie pieces.

It's pretty sweet. I would chew on the little the little pie piece things. So your dad gave you the gift of all this choking. Yeah. I never even thought of it that way. Yeah. And then when I was 11, I got another gift from him, which was a $20 check,

which ended up bouncing. Whoa. What the thing? That alone is a red flag. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But the fact that it bounced, that was here. His parents... Well, it's a set to bid.

I know. Who's a check, too? It was because he knew he didn't have any fucking money. So he did the check just as like a, Like, oh, I got $20, but not really. As far as the worst gift I gave, God, I, no gift comes to mind is like, wow, this was a terrible gift. Yeah, that's a hard one to answer.

Yeah, I'm sure I'm giving terrible gifts. That kind of applies that you'd have to go out of your way to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, I guess the idea being that you knew that you... You couldn't do any better. Yeah, you straight up just didn't do better. You really failed in that department. I can't really think of much.

I don't know. I guess the worst gift is like forgetting someone's birthday. I've done that. Yeah. One time for Christmas when I was like, I was old enough, I was like 15 or 16.

This isn't really, it's a good gift, had a bad gift. My family used to do, they still do, they used to do Christmases like in my grandma's house. So like 20, 30 people,

whatever. And I had like 40 or 50 bucks in my, to my name. So I went to the dollar tree and I bought everybody a $1 gift Yeah.

Which is a nice gesture, I think. It's also a $1 gift. So nobody, that one person was ever super stoked. It was like 30 people who were very underwhelmed. Oh, a spatula. Thank you. I actually, while we were talking, I, this wasn't like a birthday gift,

but it was a thing I gave someone. Wow, it's honest hour. When I was 14, this is right after I was right around when I first got to Malaysia, there was a girl. I think her name was Lauren. I don't remember her last name.

She lived down the street for me. And I had a really big crush on her. And I don't know what I was thinking. But I ended up taking one of the vases that we had. It wasn't a big one. It was kind of small. And I remember going to her house and telling her that it was my great-grandmas. And that I wanted her to have it.

Good Lord. And, yeah I mean, not a whole lot happened, obviously. You're up there with the rapist of murders. I don't know. I just wanted, I wanted to believe, I wanted,

I wanted to give her something that I thought she would think was important, but in retrospect, I just think about how cringy and, like, how awkward to win it. She probably didn't buy your bullshit either. She was like, oh, she was like, oh, she'd seen this before. Yeah, I mean, what did she even do with it? And she was fucking threw the trash.

Like, what the fuck? Yeah. No, that was. It was a different time, obviously. Young and stupid. Trying. If I didn't get a vase from you, I know where it came from.

If I tell you, it's from my great-grandma, you know where it's really from. Fucking Target. Yeah, so that's the worst and best I've done. All right. So there are a couple more questions we've got here, but I actually, we were talking about this

a little bit earlier, and I just wanted to recap a little bit on your guys's adventure at the zoo. So you guys were talking about the Philadelphia's zoo and how it's really poo. Chris went to the zoo. I excluded Zach because Zach is a dickhead. I said here in the attic and played with models. You're banned from the zoo after the incident. I looked out of the city from the attic and wish I could... I went with my parents

when they visited. Yeah. So what do you want to know? I want to know why you thought it stunk so much. Like you were talking about like the animals and stuff. Okay so backstory. I went to Dublin Zoo when I was 17. Yeah. What did you think of the zoo then? Exactly, right? So I went to Dublin Zoo in Ireland Where usually I'm sorry to be mean Usually stuff in Ireland is not as good It's stuff in America because there's more

People here and shit gets done Faster, I don't know, everything's More What do you call it? Better? I guess. I mean Diverse. What's technologically advanced? You're saying Irish have fucking flatheads of the end with all the brows

Is what you're saying. It's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that America gets shit first usually, so America's usually ahead a bit. Okay. So when I went to Irish Zoo in Dublin when I was 17, I walked around. I saw Silverback Gorillas in a fucking 10-foot room looking like they were going to blow their brains there. The second I got a gun. I saw the giraffes. The monkey's just like staring at you.

Have you ever seen? Look, no, I'm killing. Come here. If you ever see the video of the gorilla walking out of his back legs, it's the scariest fucking thing ever. Yeah, that was me in a suit, but we were in Dublin suit. The guerrillas wanted to kill themselves. Everything wanted to kill themselves. I've never seen a more depressing atmosphere in my life, and it didn't help that it was Ireland, so the day was gray.

So everything was bad, but I recently talked to my mom, and she said that Dublin Zoo is really good now. But anyways, oh yeah, so she had just gone to Dublin Zoo a few weeks ago. So she was on a zoo kick? Yeah, pretty much. She went to Dublin Zoo with my little cousin. They said they had a great time. And then we went to Philadelphia Zoo and it was worse than Dublin Zoo somehow. Did she admit that it was worse?

Yeah. Okay. So it was fucking tiny. We walked around the entire zoo within like half an hour. Half the animals weren't out, even though it was like the nicest, it wasn't too hot. Were you the other time there was a dead monkey? Yeah. He fucking fell backwards.

A monkey was like a top of the tree and everyone was like screaming. Everyone was screaming at it. He was throwing coconuts to all the fucking park people. He was like he had his arms back to. against the wall on top of he was breathing really heavily looking down and his eyes were bulged. And the monkeys were pointing laughing at him. He fucking jumped and he fucking splunged. Yeah, you can crack the skull open and his head hung back looking towards the people and his mouth was open. And it was flies.

It was awful. It was horrible. But what I'm saying, sorry, what I'm saying is Philadelphia Zoo, half the animals weren't out. Their enclosures were even somehow smaller than Dublin Zoo. But I'm not saying Dublin Zoo is bad anymore. I'm saying when I went it was fucking shit. I would say, oh, they'll be a zoo shit. It's also super expensive when you go in there, too. Yeah, it was really expensive. And all the animals that I saw didn't look happy. It's weird, like, because I've always thought,

there's something really fucked up about having the really kind of, like, self-aware animals there. Yeah. Like, you can kind of get around there if there's a stupid fucking lizard walking around. But, like, if there's, if there's, like, a monkey with, like, a human sad eyes, like, who. Yeah, that makes me sick. You're like, oh, my God. You know, he's in a giant fucking cug.

They have, like, their hands, like, their palms on the glass wall. wall. Yeah, they're trying to make contact with you. They're definitely depressed. It was really fucking weird. Do you remember when we went up there? We saw the orangutanics sitting out in the grass.

Yes. No, do you remember that, right? They looked sad, except they had the biggest enclosure at the time, right? It went back there with my mom and dad, and now there's, like, ducks there. Oh, no. They gave these weird, stupid animals, like, ducks and fucking, like, all these shitty animals, the biggest

enclosures, and they gave the big animals the smallest enclosures. It was weird. I think you should be able to have Lucky's trapped in a fucking So I'm curious About I'm not the kind of guy who breaks into fucking labs No I know I know

But Zach tell us the story about your dad Looking at the gorilla Oh yeah A lot of gorilla You know You're not supposed to look at gorillas in the eyes Because there's, you know Oh the challenge

It looks like yeah challenge But there's a big sign On the Zuzrived to that's a dog And being my dad What does my dad do He looks to the girls in the eyes He stares at him And they're going to go

Who My dad would ooh And look at the eyes And made his eyes bigger And the gorilla It was one of the scariest things ever the girls were screaming Picked up a huge A huge fucking brand you

Through it at the glass My dad never did that again It was one of the scariest things ever The look at the girl's eyes was like He looked like a fucking serial killer It was the scariest thing ever Yeah he did that I was like dad don't do anything

He's gonna be fine, it's funny trust me I'm curious at this stage Where we are I'm wondering if in the near future We'll have Zoo of like hybrid experiment animals. That'd be cool. Because we've already seen, like, you know what?

I don't think zoos are to get around for much longer than I feel. I feel like eventually... I really don't think they're a good idea. Like, I like the idea of preserving something like in the age of species and shit, but I don't know, something just doesn't seem right. It doesn't feel like it's preserving in some ways, though. Yeah, when you're keeping an animal in a fucking room its entire life, it's kind of fucked up.

It's like putting someone on life support. Like, they're not really alive. Yeah. You're sure the heart's peedy, but they're just fucking... I mean, if you look at the monkeys, you really see. depression there is. And some zoos would ever have big things where the monkeys be discreet and gorillas are my favorite animal and when I see

a depressed gorilla it makes me fucking pissed off. You just have to have like that really positive gorilla in there. It's like, guys, it's not as bad as you think. Hey, we got food, we got a place to stay we don't have to be. There's no poachers coming after us. Come on, guys. When you see a zookeeper walk into a grill enclosure with a big machete

and start hacking off a griller's arms, that makes me sick, dude, there was one more than nurses. Dude, I saw one who's really fucking up. I saw a really smiling like I started throwing peanuts out he stood smiling laughing and clapping the zookeeper ran with a stick and sort of beating into the head because he wasn't on to smile the girl couldn't smile he wasn't allowed to smile and then he took the peanuts he threw him to the alligators do you know have you ever been to a have you ever been to a medium a medium yeah and they're like I'm gonna read your

hand now oh like palm your hand yeah one time I saw a medium in a gorilla enclosure because the gorilla was depressed you wanted to know what was going on She was like... She ripped the medium's arm off. She looked at his lifeline on his hand. Okay. And she looked at him in his big gorilla eyes. She said, I see death.

And he went... Fucking grab your head and ripped it off and started with the glass. That's so funny. Because they're so close to us. Yeah, I was going to say, I think monkeys, oh my God, we had this... They're just to form people. Should we say this for the New York one? But we had Chris and John and I, when we were in New York,

we had this fucking running junk the whole time. We was fucking slaying us. Just do it Yeah, you can always come back to it I think, okay I think I think I hit upon One of the funniest things ever

Foreign people in distress Foreign accents in horrible distress Yeah Like I was doing yesterday I was talking about an Indian man Like watching his son be killed The goat the goat attack And I was like making myself laugh

But like We were doing this We were doing this thing Where it was like a man from Africa And it was like The whole joke We did it like over and over Okay so the story

is always, this is always the joke, is there's a distressed African man in the jungle, recounting a story of a monkey that walks into the village. He recounts how they kill the monkey and why. So it's like, one was like, at one day I am in my village, a monkey come from the woods, he walked like that. I see the monkey. I'm feeding where they sneak. His brain come out. The monkey never come back.

We kept doing it. We kept changing. We were like, we were like, we're like, one day. was in the village a monkey come out I look like him he challenged me I hang him up like Jesus Christ for all the monkeys to see the monkeys never come back to the village amazing I was digging a pit in the village when a big fucking monkey walking from the wood we see a monkey try to fly a kite from up above the tree we throw a monkey the monkey come down the monkey never come to the village

I flew a monkey right on the kite. Can you tell the... Wait, can you tell the Jesus story with the Jesse Ventura accent? Oh, I haven't told my Jesse Ventura accent. Who fuck is that? Basically, okay, so I was... I was sitting there, and a monkey just happened to walk in,

probably from the Bilderberg group. Those guys were always up to something, trying to steal our guns. And a monkey walked right in, and I started beating. with a gun because I'm allowed to have my rights and the monkey died of course do alex Jones I said do Alex Jones not a car starting actually it's really accurate that's all that my throat hurts that was that was awesome that was amazing

I was in the village with a big fucking monkey because the point of the thing is like we can I don't know we like we can't It's funny because the only the only thing happens basically a monkey comes to the village He's got killed this Like happy, playful monkey

just like dancing it through the village A big smiling monkey He's killed with a stick All the Cape End deform monkey monkey with a stick No Monkeys are funny Oh god

But John, holy shit John can do this perfect Like Middle Eastern accent And he was fucking Slaying me That's awesome We just kept doing the shit We'll save that

For the JG episode John will do this fucking monkey I'm sure when he's here again. I'm excited for that. Why don't we try to get him out here? He's in L.A. for a couple weeks. We can have... When the day comes back, we can have him.

Do you think of a zoo were to host some, like, human-made hybrid animals that animal rights activists would come out and try to... Definitely. Like, if they were to be, like, the Anderthals,

if they... But... Then why aren't they fucking protesting shit now at zoos? Or do they? Yeah. I saw a... I saw a protester at the zoo.

Yeah. And if seriously, I don't really protested at all. kind of stuff. I'm not a vegetarian or anything. I'm not... Right. You know, animal cruelty's not good, but I'm not really an activist or anything, but I think zoos are probably not a... It's just going to weird as me out. It's not a good idea, I don't think.

I think about, like, Tumblr and, like, some of the things that have come up in terms of, like, you know, being important social issues. Like, uh, I couldn't make my gender, uh, rock type or whatever. Yeah. Shit like that. Not yet. But like, all of a sudden, but then, like, things like zoos, they're like right there in the middle of the city. Yeah.

And it's like such... In the heart of the city, these monkeys are the big fucking cement cage. They're like sitting in piles of poop. The zookeepers dropping cinder blocks from 20 feet up on their heads. And beating them with sticks. Yeah. And it's like, it just, I don't know, it just surprises me that these people who have no problem, like, speaking out about things. I don't know.

It just seems like that would be such a much. That's an obvious visual, like, I don't know, in some cases of travesty. When you see these sad animals. I've always thought that the people who feel really, really oppressed because fictional characters dress the way they don't like them to dress, they feel more oppressed with that than like a woman in Afghanistan who leaves the faith and gets killed. They feel way more oppressive, which is baffling to me.

And I know it's not like, oh, there can't be different problems to worry about, but if you're worrying about a fictional, the way a fictional character dresses, is you don't have any problems anymore. Yeah. That's it. If you're doubt to that, if that's the big issue of the day, you're good.

You know what's so funny? You're good, I promise you you're good. What's interesting to me is, like, a lot of those opinions and like how strongly people feel about it, I wonder like in five,

six years, when they look back at themselves, do they think like, wow, I was a dummy. You know what I mean? Because like... Part, but I feel like some people

grow out of it. I think it's a phase. I think that kind of group of people really thrive. off the younger people who are like 14, 15, 16, who are really trying to find themselves. Maybe try to find their sexuality. No, and I understand how it happens at that phase of your life. So I would say maybe, but I feel like maybe that.

Also, maybe these people can grow to be adults who end up pushing it further. I don't know. Probably a little bit of both. Hopefully, a chunk of people grow out of it, I think. I hope. What's really weird is, you see, like, communism is a big thing on Tumblr. They really... I've seen, like, post of the same people who do the same thing

because they really think communism is like... But that's such a high school thing. It is a high school thing. That was such a, like, the principle of like, oh, yeah, everyone's equal and we all... Exactly. And everyone's like... Yeah. But then you want to shake him and go, you're a fucking idiot.

Yeah. There has not been one scenario where communism yielded anything but fucking corruption and death. No. Not one communist. country. I mean, even a place like Chinese is not really communist anymore. It's not.

They're really pseudo-communists. They're a lot more capitalist. Yeah. Just they pretty much at this point. Pretty much. And I do think at times they use the communism when they need to like strong or something. Yeah.

When they need to make something happen. But for the most part, they've been very good about, look, if they were truly this quote unquote communist nation, they would have never lent America money. You know what I mean? Like that would not be the case.

They're not. They're not. My point is like, it's that weird phase of like, yeah. I would be a copy. There was an anarchist too. We're like,

you're like, there was a point where everyone on fucking Reddit and Tumblr were like, look how cool Vladimir Putin is. He's like riding horses and shit. And then like, like, do you remember people were obsessed with him? He was like,

he's awesome. Oh, and they had all these pictures with him with his shirt off and stuff. Yeah. Like he gets people to take of him like fighting bears and shit. It's fucking.

It's honestly Hitler level stuff. I'm not doing that because I know that's, really like the easy run I'd say he's like Hitler I'm saying like Hitler never like wanted himself to take pictures with his hands in his pocket

really really really really cared about his image and a lot of most leaders all leaders do care about that but Putin was like a different level like propaganda where it's like him with his shirt off him with a you know a big flyy plane him bombing bears in the ocean Karai and so forth yeah seriously

He's a whole different level of like Have you heard about that thing world leaders want to have their arm facing the camera when they do a handshake there's really weird levels of that so that makes sense but then Putin's on a different level I think compared to one of the people have So what would you think of Obama in terms of his

What do you think is concerns about public image or? Look cool baby Yeah I think that's about it I feel like he wants to appeal to the youth And I think honestly he's done a lot of talk shows He's on he's on he's on Camel and stuff He's on you know he was on between two ferns he was on

BuzzFeed, I think, recently. Yeah. Every time it's for to plug the healthcare, I think. But he's not a good job with that. He knows what he's doing. Yeah. As far as that goes.

I wish he was, like, doing his job and not, like, on TV, doing all these YouTube videos. I think, I think recently, it's in his last, I think he realizes his last two years, he doesn't really have to win

another election, so he's doing a little bit more stuff. The Cuba thing, I'm glad, cut this. This is, I'll cut all this out, because this is political shit. I'll be what's to hear about this. I'm glad with the

Cuban thing. I think he's done good with that. The Iran deal for now it's probably going to fall apart though. Yeah, they seemed like they were actually on board, which was a surprise. I think his foreign policy stuff, but I think he's made some, I think he's made some big decisions incorrectly, but he's also made, recently I think he's made

some good ones. That's very interesting, Zach. Oh! All right. Zach, let's get to another question. I'm just curious. There are a few in here that are kind of softballs that I think would be kind of fun to answer. I don't know how you guys are going to answer this one though

Who's your favorite superhero? This is a question asked by Caleb Do you guys have a favorite superhero? Not really Hmm I'm trying to think Probably just Batman I'm fucking stereotypical I like Batman

You know what I do like Spider-Man a lot You too Spider-Man there you go Do you think So you know how there's kind of like this hatred for Superman because he's got all the powers He's like a five-year-old man I'm kind of part of it I don't like Superman

But do you think it'll ever come back? Like, do you think it'll ever circle back? They did something really cool with him in that game injustice where they made him the bad guy and it was the best idea ever. How was he a bad guy? He sees Lois Lane get killed by the Joker and he just fucking loses it and becomes like Hitler of the world and takes over. And then he's like killing off any superheroes that oppose him.

And it was a fucking amazing idea. That's great. Because he's overpowered and not. Yeah, I think if you do things like that is interesting. But it's just like... When you overpower the villain, it's always cool. Yeah. Well, then it makes sense when you need everybody to band against them. Yeah.

That's the only time I've ever liked him was in that game. Because he's a dick. I think that's the most interesting way to go to Super Bowl. He becomes an asshole. He gets cocky. That's an interesting way to do it. It makes more sense, too. He came from another planet. He comes to Earth.

Yeah, and he's fucking invincible to everybody on Earth. Yeah. I never really liked it. Yeah, that is interesting. That he is, as far as villains are concerned, Like the fact that he has one weakness, but all the strengths, he is actually set up to be more of a villain. I never even thought of it that way. That'd be a good movie I did to play with it.

They should honestly make a movie of infamous. Or no, in justice, not infamous. I don't think any, I don't think any Superman movies done that, tackle that aspect of it. But. That struggle between you. But then I'm also curious, like. Spide a bit through trying to do that. Oh, that movie does!

Did you ever see, did you see those old Superman cartoons? Yeah, those are awesome. where he was in Japan and he was beating up all the Japanese people during World War II. No, but if you were saying the pop-I one? He's like throwing tanks around and there's like the big buck-toothed Japanese ones that are like, oh, it's Superman. They all actually talking to too. Yeah, they do.

And they have the big buck teeth in the really slanted eyes. But you're talking about Superman as a villain. I'm sure they may have a Japanese version of Superman where it's like super evil American man, you know. Did you ever see the Popeye one? your sap, Mr. Jap. What? That's a real thing, I swear to God. It's pretty funny. Yama sap, Mr. Jop.

It's like, Popeye, he's like, hey, David, there's, look at these guys. And they do the same thing, it's like, I was like, oh, hello! And they give him like a peace tree. He's like, I'm a piece of a guy myself. And he's sort of saying it. And they fucking knock him by the head of shit. It's the funniest thing ever. For all the wrong reasons.

World War II propaganda is seriously one of the funniest things because they just didn't give a shit. Yeah. They didn't fucking get her. That's wild. That's true. All, there was like, you know, because they were, you know, with Pearl Harbor and everything else, it's like, you know. They're not the only country at that point to attack the U.S. ever.

And at that point, you better be ready for some. Yeah. It's interesting, though. I don't feel like you could ever have that happen nowadays. Like, even if... We kind of do. And, like, not on a governmental, but we definitely have it on a personal level. Like, I think, like...

Well, I'm just saying... A lot of Americans hate Russia's now. There's a lot of, like, fuck Putin. That is a lot of, like, fuck American stuff in Russia. It's really weird. Right. I think I read a poll. a poll that tensions between the U.S. and Russia, between the populations,

it's the biggest mistrust since like the 80s, it's the Cold War? Sure. So that's always weird to be when you see that. But do you think of something happened in America now? Like if there was some major conflict with another country, and we made some cartoons or major studio released cartoons or whatever that straight out did stereotypes. It made fun of them that that would actually get published.

Because I feel like there's so much dissension within the country. It would be hard to differentiate between on an individual level. level and a you know yeah it's a system I go because for example 9-11 a lot of like South Park did that episode of bin Laden that could be perceived as insensitive like 50 years sure like because he's like ooh you know he looks like this or whatever right but it it made sense of that so it'd be weird like oh the 50 years people could say oh comedy central must have funded that by the government it's like no even Disney did those fucking propaganda videos so it's talking about yeah yeah yeah yeah Disney Warner Brothers yeah

So, I mean, I definitely think on an individual level, like, if the U.S. got attacked again or there was other terrorist attack. But even during 9-11, there were so many people within America that were like, yeah, we deserved it. That's what I mean. Most people got shot. Most people got those people were good. There's some truth to that, but not. I went to NYU, dude. It was a very liberal school.

I had tons of not only students, but we had some teachers who were like, well, we were kind of asking for it, guys. Really? And it was like, you know, so I. I just feel like nowadays there's so much, people want to, I mean, it's guised as, not compassion, but like, empathy. I don't know what it's guised as, but whatever the fuck it is. Tolerance? Yeah, it's guised as tolerance, but it ends up becoming intolerance to the other end of the spectrum. It's like, I, okay.

It's really weird as a fucking dirty liberal of myself. It's weird to see liberals be so afraid to touch Muslims at all, extremist Muslims. They're terrified. But they're glad they shit on the Christian. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's funny to be... Everyone does it. It's like, oh, you fucking stupid Christians believe your God, ate eggs or whatever.

Fuck for you, whatever. Yeah. Oh, what are you stupid? You got, who's fucking, you faggot? Yeah. And it's like, nobody... I mean, God, nobody's going to touch his law. So, so...

So, on that... Be your... So, who's, um, Anita Sarkisian's kind of little puppet guy? What's his name? Uh, fucking John McIntosh, whatever? Oh, yeah, yeah. So John McIntosh, or whatever his name is, and when, um, the French cartoon artist died. Oh, don't even...

Yeah, that's a great example of that. Yeah. I was so... So it's like here it was like this time to, you know, not just mourn, but celebrate the work

of this person and... His artist. Right. And the fact that he was not going to be bullied by... He was going to have his own opinions. You know,

he was going to speak out about things that if you look into his cartoons, they were actually very... You know, I think they were fair in a lot of the assessments they made.

Obviously, it's a cartoon, so you're making fun of shit. But the fact that his death then became a Twitter point for them to say, oh yeah, what was it? Jay C. Charlie means white lives matter. Yeah. It was like,

what fucking, that is so liberal. It's like in its own, it's like. But what's weird is they have no problem doing it to everybody else. I don't get it. Yeah. And it's like I said, it's coming from somebody who is a fucking self-proclaimed asshole. Evil blows. Yeah, it

goes from like, it just boggles logic. And it's just so far out. there and it's so transparently just, yeah, evil, I guess. I would call that evil. That's just, that that's, that is taking the death of someone who was making about them.

Yeah, making about them. And this is a person who was about free speech. This is about a person who was an artist. You'd think from like a liberal standpoint, like they're kind of a poster child. But no, their death now becomes because they weren't someone from Ferguson or something and people were upset about it. And that's

also to say that nobody was protesting or marching or caring about all the Ferguson shit. That was all over the internet. Everyone was a part of that. So the idea that they could use that as a bullet point to try to equate those in any way. Yeah. Just

shows how absolutely insane that far side of the spectrum is. Yeah. Anyways. I mean, even that guy, if I can just say well, that's the guy also, weirdly enough, has really weird, communist ideas. I bet he does. Like he's openly said, like,

you know, free, free, free speech and free work it's a terrible he's like what do you work you to that as well wait so wait what without free speech then what I think he's so far left he's he's seriously level which is fine but it's just it's weird to see that I what's beyond free speech though basically say say what

I like and I approve of all got it yeah no that's all the shit well that's actually how he works too because I oh yeah because there was a comment made about um what was it there was something about bloodborne being too violent or something it was like yeah but I guess bloodborn

out, but it's okay, cause games, or whatever he wrote. And then somebody made a comment, and I just wrote, in a reply, all I wrote was, I think it's pretty fair to say that, uh, that this is clearly a, um, a parody account. Yeah. Instantly blocked. Yeah. Instantly blocked. They've got weird blockbots set up.

I'm on a blacklist. Oh, is there blockbots? No, no, you got blocked by him, by him, but my point is I've been blocked by people I've never even seen. I've talked to you on Twitter before. I'll click someone's profile who's like in that group I've already blocked. Like what? They have block list.

That's how afraid they are. They're cowards. That is that. And then I had a little tirade about that just about like, you know, if you're going to sit here on a public platform and spout your opinions at people like it's goddamn gospel. And you can't handle anyone even having. I didn't even challenge his fucking opinion. It was literally just a joke. It's so fucking erotic and so funny.

It's savory. Yeah. They had this like, we're being put down. We're the minority group. Don't put us down. And then if you have any conflicting views, they block you. Exactly. I drew a picture of Revolution 60 that Brian O'oo game blocked. Just drew a picture of it. Well, Chris, what did you draw? Okay. What did you draw? Okay, I exaggerated it a bit. I was blocked by fucking Tim Schaefer. All I did was reach me a joke that was like, it was his stupid sock puppet joke that he made that wasn't funny. Yeah, you know what?

He must have... He started music and somebody did. That day, yeah, that ba-de-b-d-de-b-d-d-dee. Dude, I could imagine, like, after, if there are blockbots or whatever, that alone, when something like that happens, right? They go full-door. They must be, like, full-force blocking. There must have been, like, 30,000, 40,000 blocks. Just, like, block-blot, just, like, blocking everybody.

Yeah. Like, if you wrote anything that had the word sock in it, you were done. Yeah. fucking it's just amazing that these are the people who believe that in some way they don't believe they they they they or at least they appear or at least they say

or at least they're putting on the image that they are in some way trying to be harbingers of a better future or of some kind of cause when the truth is they're little fucking children who have no spines who feel like their opinions are more important than everyone

else and anyone with a differing opinion is a brute and a chromagic chromagnum beast and they just can't handle having any kind of actual discussion about it. I would... Discussion's scary. What if somebody has a different opinion? I would fucking love

to sit down. You know me, dude. I'm super civil, man. I would love to just have an honest debate. I know exactly how some of these conversations would go. I don't know, but I kind of know from dealing with other people that seem like them, that we could have the most... I could go

in with the best of intentions. Be as patient as possible. But if I was honest and ask direct questions, that this shit would get so out of hand that they would be red face flush, flipping table, angry, and just be like, you just don't get it, you know? You're fucking a racist. Yeah.

Like, I can sense that from these people. You're a minority, so you actually, you have a power of their voices. It's funny. But they wouldn't say that. They would say you're a self-loading Asian. Yeah, something like that. You could have a bird, though, Meg.

I love my Asian side. When I sign my custom When I go across Yellow Smello Yellow Smello Yellow Smellow I only said that once And I said it to you

When I was pointing at your dirty Pistains But I Whenever I come into the country Or leave the country Or whatever When I have to fill out

The forms and shit I always write Asian American That's I've always done that Since I was a kid That's what I did And I never changed it I mean now I don't look Asian at all But when I was a kid I did

And I was with My Asian family So it just made sense that I would do that. Okay. Speaking of Chris Cuniff, Cuniff? Who the flip? Caniffy. Okay.

Change your last name. Caniffy? It's pissing everybody off here, as you can tell. You're like shaking your head. Chris, Chris right now is pretty heavily. He has a red face and he has tears on his eyes. Yeah. He's turning green.

Yeah. I'm really pissed. He asks, have you ever traveled over? Overseas, if so, where? Yes, Ireland. Was that it? Just Ireland? Yeah. That's cool.

Yeah, he stayed at a hotel It was right next to me. He didn't even say hi to me once. Wait a minute. No. Yeah. You liar. I saw one day right back to my place. Slammed the hotel room door and said, Don't come out!

You had both hands on the door. You're breathing heavily. I was like, what? You're so scared. Sweating. Don't, I have a gun. Zach visited me. You visit me twice.

No, I didn't. Yeah, he did. I did that. I visited you was. It was not twice. It was once. I visited you. It was just so long. It was September to November 2012. It was too long.

It was cool? Was it? Me and Zach, we saw many things. Okay, hold on. Somebody goes to Ireland. Like, you're in Ireland, right, Chris? Yeah. So I'm like, hey, I want to go to Ireland.

Yeah. You're like, yeah, come on over. Yeah. What the fuck do we do? What do we do? Okay. And I'm like, hey, I'm coming out to Ireland. And you're like, oh, okay, yeah.

And you're like, yeah, I got a whole week of shit plans. Let's go. So what's on this list? Okay, that's what, it's exactly what Aaron and Susie did when I visited. So I showed them the quarry in Wexford, which is... So you showed them a big rock hole, okay. Yeah, we showed them Johnstown Castle from the inside. So you saw them an old rock building.

Yeah, uh-huh. We showed them the outside of our flat where you can see people fingering each other in the streets. That actually sounds pretty sweet. We went out to my mom and dad said I was to play basketball and played cards Alright It was fun You didn't take him to the Guinness factory

Oh we went to Dublin Went to Phoenix Park We went on a shitty ghost tour That was horrible Why was it horrible? Because Okay this is wow Because ghost ain't real

Never thought I even talked about this We got on a ghost bus tour Where you get onto a spooky bus Right And it This is like a big thing to do In Dublin apparently

To see you know I'm sorry, ghost bus tour sounds a little bit like ghost never mind, I'm gonna cut that. What are you gonna say? It sounds like Ghostbusters! We're like Ghostbust tour. We're going on the Ghostbust door. You're leaving that in!

No, I'm cutting it. Leave it. Cut it, cut it. Cut it. I'm so bad with these stupid puns, going. Okay, I liked it. But, um, okay, so you get on the bus and they're like, we're gonna bring you to all the ghostly parts of Dublin, okay? So you get on the bus and they, they like, furnish it from the inside,

so it looks like a ghost house on the inside of the bus. Okay. of a double-decker bus. That's kind of fun. They black out the windows and put curtains over it, so it's fucking dark inside. Oh. Okay.

And then this guy came on, or he came up onto the bus, the tour guide, and he's like, hello, I'm going to show you around Dublin. Nah! And then we were like,

okay? And then he, okay. How many people were on this tour, by the way? Um, say 30. Oh,

wow. Okay. So, there's a lot. I know. And then, okay, so we get on the bus,

and they're like, We're gonna bring you around, show you the scariest places in Dublin. Then they drive you around, and they park outside of hotels where you look 50 feet across at a building. You're like, that's where someone die. And you're like, okay. And then you speed off. And then it's like, and then they brought us to this shitty graveyard. It was like, a bunch of monks died here.

It's like, no shit. Wait, there's dead people in a graveyard? There's dead people in my fucking everywhere. Go that's sake. I could have spilled beans. Okay. Finish that thought. There's no people you know what?

Let's move on. So what happens? Zach made me look like a serial killer. No, but, you know, it brought us to a monastery. I found the dumpal bag. You found the dumpal bag? I turned to police. Okay.

Good. Dude, what's going to happen to you? You fucking monster? Chris, the autopsy showed her trying to resist. I don't know what you did. Listen to me, I don't know what you did. but you're going to be caught and you're going to run prison, you fucking scumbag. I don't know.

Not if I kill you with this chainsaw. I don't know. This is serious. This is a TV viewer. I hope you know the kind of fucking person I live with. I hope, Chris, I hope you stay up every night thinking about what you fucking did to ruin that family's life. I didn't. So how was the rest of the tour?

What happened after? It was, it was fine. It was fine. I mean, I know it was shit. It's so weird because when I think of Ireland I do think of castles. I do think of ghosts I do think of all sorts of spooky-ass Celtic spooks My uncle works at this really cool castle and he let us into it and I'm pretty sure you saw that too Zagg I did you go crazy

Zach did you like Johnstown castle? Yeah, it was alright. Okay, see? Do they have any equivalent? Do they have any equivalent? of like Lenden Tower where like they have like castles with torture chambers. There's a damn goose of the front yard of the castle that spook people or anything. Oh that's another thing that we did we looked at so scrappy. That's just like that's like one minute.

Is that anything? It's one minute away from where I used to live in town. And what was it? It was an old kind of a castle settlement thing where they had like they had, okay so this lady was doing a tour and she was like, okay so this is the entrance when Vikings used to run here in here and invade they used to get pots of fire and poured on people Was she talking like that excited about it?

She was delighted. And right in that door there was these like four tiny holes in the wall with bars for It was like this is where they put the bad people. It's like sweet. Arlen is cool. You imagine like the person before her got fired because it was like you're making this sound too depressing. We need to be a little bit more excited.

We have tourists here. We don't want people to go kill themselves after this. I remember the highlight of their trip to Ireland was when we went to the castle it was me, Niles, Aaron, Susie, and Barry and Jack and Patty and we brought a football thing and Nile ran up to the football

and he tried kicking it at the wall but he kicked it into his own head he kicked a ball in his own face how did you do that? It was the funniest thing He's a real-life Charlie Brown that's just like Charlie Brown this is what he was also

wasn't he was on your dark soul stream or something like that didn't he like fucking face plan he smashed his brain that was doing we were playing Resident Evil for Chris's channel he almost killed himself he literally he's walking like a fucking toddler just fell over okay do you remember what Nile

I don't is this mean to say when Nal was at his fattest no he's skinny now he lost 80 pounds yeah yeah so he was in good shape he was chunkier but when he was at his chunkiest he he was adorable when he fucked up thing so when he fell on that floor that was the funniest thing.

It was like... Watching... It was like... It was like... Fat people falling over. It's way funnier and skinny people falling over. Yeah. Skinny people falling over.

You're just thinking like the Holocaust or something like that. Simon Pegg's partner. What's his name? Yeah, Nick Frost. Yeah. He's kind of like a little Nick Frost. When I saw that beautiful Nile Murray at his fat kiddies,

kicking that ball into his own head. That was a good day. Huh? Little baby, don't say I weren't. Because mama's got to buy you. Okay, this is interesting. This is from Creeps McPasta. Oh, I like him.

Oh, that guy. He's nice. Oh, hey, though. All right. Here's a super creepy, spooky, spooky question. Are you ready? You guys always talk about the strange and dark times in your childhood. What? You always talk about the strange and dark times in your childhood.

So for a change of tone, What is the happiest memory from your childhood? Oh my god. My father towering over. He's screaming. Why is your blood? His piaz. I thought the happiest time was when your dad protected you from the guy by doing a backflip.

Yes, that is a real story. My happiest memory, is this happy memories? Yeah, what's the happiest memory from your childhood? Okay, one time I was in the Irish countryside near my grandmother's house, sitting under a beautiful apple tree, and the sun was shining down, beating down on the tree. fuck you up. This is serious. I was in the shade. It was a perfect day when a actual horse walked up to me. And being under an apple tree, I grabbed the apple

and I fed it to the horse. He ran away into the sunset and it was the nicest moment I've ever seen. Are you being serious? That is true. He's went before. Oh my God. He's being serious. That's a beautiful story, Chris. One day when I was about 12. The horse looked back and went One day when I was 12, I was laying on the grass Under an apple tree And I looked down and went

No, that's not true It was but not directly yours Okay I picked up a fucking fat worm from the ground I held it up to the sky He said, Oh no, son-ho? A big hawk came down, picked it up It grabbed me by the hand

And he flew me over the earth and showed me it And he put me back down Zach, do you want to do an eagle improv? Okay. Okay, do you want to take partner, Eagle Improv? Sure. Okay, I'll start the story, Zach will go in and you go, okay? All right.

Okay, Mac is sitting in the sitting room when a giant American bald eagle smashes through the window with a small jewel in his talent. He opens his talent to give the jewel. Nick grabs the jewel with his big fucking cryptkeeper hand. He looks at it, and heses, He then grabs the eagle by its head. Why is seeking third person as you?

I swing the eagle by its neck like a lasso over my head and fling it into the sky while grabbing its leg. It then pulls me up into the outer stratosphere. Mick grabs the small jewel in his hand. Yes. He's nearing the sun. He throws the jewel. It beats towards the sun with a thriving force

With small chunks breaking off now Nick wakes up, he's shaking in his bed His cock is lip with his dry jizz I must have passed out Whoops The end There is no conclusion It's not the end

Nick wakes up again Oh no He wakes up again except this time He's standing over Zach's dead body Which is also caked in jizz Zach wakes up and then he realized it was all the dream and he killed me. No, then Mick woke up after that. No!

And Chris and Mick and Mick have their dicks and Zicks, Zach's eye eyes. Mick! The eagle wakes up. Oh! Eagle screams. That was awful. Yeah, let's go. Oh, it's the Eagle Imprope hour.

There you go, that's the Eagle Imprope. Eagle Improv. No, I wake up again. Zach's fucking blood and cum, crust into a small little stone. Which I then... That was the jewel. It was the jewel all along.

That's not. I wrapped it all up. You can't make a jewel. Let's do another one. You go do an improv? Mario is sitting on his bed, eating a slice of pizza and getting fucking pizza grease all of himself. Luigi walks in and says...

Louis Glaxen says... He says, what are you doing? You fucking fat piece of shit? No, you can't steal my improv. Come on. Okay, let's do it. actual problem. We didn't finish Mario.

I'm Mario. You're Luigi. I'm Luigi. You're Princess Toad. Your Princess Toad. Your Princess Toad. Your Princess Toad, boy. Okay, you're Mario. Oh, this pizza. I like the flavor.

The different flavors. Mario, get, come on now. Papa Jaws. Stop. Papa Jod's never fails to deliver on their delicious pizza deals. Go to Papa Jons.com right now. The pop will give you a free drink.

And that extra chicken poppers if you order a free pizza right now. The end, it's over. That's it. My earpop from laughing That's interesting What the fuck we were talking about Your favorite childhood memory

Oh yeah How the fuck to be on eagles Talking to horses and eating at I did I survive eagles Why'd I do that I don't know Favorite childhood memory? I don't know Oh yeah

I forgot we were on that I don't know You know You know going camping with my family really? When you were a kid you liked that? You weren't like, wow, the ground's hard. No, I loved it. Kind of like going to like a ballgame or something?

I don't know. I remember when I was seven. I just got in first grade. My mom brought me she went to school McDonald's. You know, you should have to do that before, but came to school was like, I brought me out to a car. We got a puppy. You showed a puppy It was fucking

It was my dog And she was like eating The little dog Was eating the fucking back seatbelt Yeah so That's cute You put it down Yeah we fucking stepped

When I said it till I died See No but I don't know I was like seven And my mom Gaving McDonald's and Show me her puppy beagle Oh

That was full of memory That's cute Had a puppy beacon When I was a kid My grandma At the end of the day She worked two jobs She'd take me to school

And she'd go work her two jobs Come back Cook meals and take care of everything around the house. My mom was in college and working at the time. And so my grandma did everything. But at the end of the day, she would sit in like this tiny little, she was a midget, dude.

She had to actually have like a little, like, it wasn't even a cushion. It was like a straight up, like, it almost like a footstool that she put on top of the car seat just so she could see over the wheel of this Oldsmobile. Anyway, so she had this tiny little rocking chair. And she, at the end of the day, would read her newspaper. And I would play with Legos.

So we'd be in the same room. And I always asked her, like, when she was going to go read her newspaper. So I could go into her room and just build Legos, like, while she was, you know, reading her newspaper. Yeah. But I also did this thing when I was a kid. This is when I was very young, like, three or four. I didn't know at the time what I was doing, but I would always play with Legos on my stomach. You know what I mean?

So, like, I'm lying on my stomach and I'm playing on the floor. I thought you built it all your... No, no, not on my stomach. I may have done that, too, though. But no, I'm lying on my stomach on the floor. Yeah. And I was building Legos. but I would always wear like sweatpants before I went to bed

and I remember I'd always like kind of like rub my pelvis against the ground. You'd fuck the ground. While I was playing with Legos. And I realized now that what I was doing was I was at a very even an early age I was jacking off. You fucking. I was like, yeah, it was like whatever.

And my grandma would always get so mad at me when I did it and I didn't understand why. But she'd always be like, ayah, you're always like wriggling around on the ground. But I think she knew what I was doing, so she was like trying not to be like... Don't jack off. Yeah, don't jack off. That's really weird. Okay.

Sorry. No, that was still like one of the best memories I have in my child. Can I tell you something weird that, like, I've always, I've had this fucking memory in my head on my whole life and I like always forget to tell it. Is it real? Yeah, no, it's real. Okay. It's like the same thing. When I was younger, I have a very vivid memory of sitting in my grandmother's kitchen with my uncle, my granddad, my grandma, my mom and my dad.

Yeah. And I was playing... No, I was rubbing my dick through my pants. Like pretty hard. Just like rubbing my dick. Yeah. And I just remember everyone in the room saying, Chris, you have to stop doing that. Like, you have to... Yeah, but no one was telling you what you were doing. They were just like, oh, stop, just stop. But they were like,

Chris, you're not supposed to be doing that. Like, this very dirty behavior. How old were you? Fucking three or four. Yeah. But I just remember being like... But I like the way it feels. And there's just like, no, Chris, it doesn't matter. You have to stop doing that. But I just always just touch my dick in public, like, constantly.

Do you now? No? I touch my balls a lot without realizing. You ever kind of realize you were just, you ever kind of realize you were shit in your pants? You know what, though? I went through a phase where I was, like, really against touching my junk, like, in public. Yeah. And I don't know if it's just because, I don't know what

happened, but I kind of, like, stopped caring about it. Like, I went through a phase where, like, I didn't want to do it. Like, I knew it was wrong and embarrassing. But now it's like, if I got to adjust my shit, I'm going to adjust my shit. How old were you? How old were you, you figured out the waistband trick? Oh, God.

What was your first 15? Yeah. I was not subtle at all. Until I was like 13 or 14, I used to get erections like in class. Yeah. And then the bell would ringed. I was like, I have to walk to the next class. So I'd do one or two things.

It took you that long to figure out. You could just like, you can't flip your dick up into your shirt while you're in class. You can't if you're stealthy. Yeah. I learned how to do it. My point is, the point is there's two things I would do if I had an erection I had to walk two different class. Yeah. One, I would like, try to put books or a bad.

egg like in front of me. But if that didn't work too, I would just put both of my hands in my pockets and lift my Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I didn't fool you because I just looked like you had an erection and it was also walking like an idiot. Yeah, they didn't fool one fucking person. Jeez. Yeah, no, the waistband trick is good.

The only problem, though, was like we had, I did the waistband trick in high school a long time ago. And this is, you know, in high school, you're raging. Like, your boners are bigger than I've ever been. Oh, it's really a fucking puff! It's like they hurt. It's like purple and it hurt. Yeah, it's, oh God.

I just remember I had one one time, and I did put it in my waistband. And I don't know if the waistband was almost like a rubber band where it was like pinching it so it wouldn't go down. Like it just stayed hard for a while through like part of the day. Luckily, there's a point where it's like 60% instead of 100 and you can kind of push it back down. Yeah, but this was staying. For some reason, it was staying around like the 80, 90 size.

So then eventually what happened, I do remember this. We were in the cafeteria and we were waiting around and a friend came up and he was just like, Hey, what's up? And it was very casual. It wasn't like one of those high fives like, yay! Like, you know, like the end of a cartoon or some shit. Yeah. This was straight up just like, oh, hey, what's up, man? And so I went up to give him a high five.

Don't see. In Malaysia, we all have shorts and we have... Oh, don't say it, me. And we have a short sleeve shirts. Oh, no. But I was, you know, this is, you know, I was kind of... I was a little bigger at the time. So, like, everything's a little tight.

I just remember going to give him a high five. Oh, don't say it. And I can straight up see the head. of my, because like when I lifted my arm, my shirt kind of came up a little bit. And you could straight up see just like the little head like poking over the fucking thing. Did he see it? Um, no, it wasn't mentioned. But I know.

He saw it. No. He totally saw your dick. When we, I just remember when I did the high five because I wasn't even really looking in his eyes. It was just like a really casual like, oh, hey, what's up? So I was just kind of like looking down when I high fived him. And I remember like as soon as that happened, my shirt came up. And I could see my dick hole just staring right up at me.

And I was like, all right. And he never said anything. No one said anything. No one saw anything. No one saw anything. Me. I saw it. The end. That's a huge turbine. Or like, or your pants are going to fall down and the borders are going to pop out? Yeah. But now that I'm older, I'm like, I wouldn't mind if someone's, you know what I mean? It's like, if you want to see it, go ahead. Uh, yeah. Do you guys remember when you were younger and you touched the, like, the tip of your dick? And you'd be like, oh, I can't, I can't. It's too much. Oh, you mean like the sensitivity of it? Yeah. Do you remember that? Or is you still like that? Because mine's, sure not anymore.

No, mine's definitely not anymore. I can slap it around. I mean, it's covered in calluses. I could punch it. I could drop a cinder block. Yeah. On to my tip and blow it up. I think, yeah, you just spend so much time with it.

You're so used to it. But I think back then especially, I was getting boners all the time when I was a kid. I remember that. Like, it was, I could get a boner doing anything. Watching anything. Hearing anything. I still get boners doing anything.

Really? If I see like one tit, that's it. I'm sad off. Sometimes if I don't jack off for like a dead. And I'm like on the subway or I'm walking someone. I see like a billboard of a girl like I need to jack off. It's weird like, you know, what switches that off? Yeah, if you're watching the news.

I can sit in my room for four days straight. And if I don't see a tit, I'll be like, okay, I'm good. But in the second, the second I see a tit. Wait, do you mean a, like a bare breast? Yeah. No, if I see, if I see a girl, like, you know, if I do it for a damn, like, oh, look at that, I need to jack off. What if Chris, what if Chris got out of the shower and it was really steamy? so it was kind of hard to see

and you just saw his butt You saw my curves Yeah Would you think you get horny? Did you have a hot girl butt? Yeah He kind of does I do

I got a big fat ass I don't think so I might feel really conflicted And they want to kill myself For a day And then I'd just jack off The next day I tried to forget it

When I was on a school Toor in France And I'm in high school I was walking up the steps And some guy behind me Was like Chris You've got a nice girl ass You do kind of have a girl butt

I was like thanks Well then Don't want to talk to him anymore I would neither Zach you got a little boy butt I have a little boy butt I have a flat ass. I have a white boy ass. You've got a dog ass.

He's got like shoulder blades. He has no butt cheeks. His butt hole just like sticks out. Stop the podcast right now. This is not a joke. You've got two baby fingers for a ass. We've been doing this for so long and it's been fun but I... You're going?

Are you done? Oh, the poor baby. That's... Have you ever stuck your dick? Have you ever stuck your dick? in a vacuum hose. I tried once when I was a kid. Did you really? Yeah. While it was going? Okay, this is what

happened. I saw it in the movie. Yeah, that's what I, so everyone's seen it like in a movie or something. I saw it in the movie, I went to put my dick in it and it didn't feel good to begin with, so I didn't turn it on. I did date a girl very sure, I didn't date her. I hooked up with a

girl a long time ago who I guess didn't quite understand the principles of a blowjob. and well initially it's actually kind of got a little bit of a back story only because so we were at a party everyone

was hanging out and we ended up hooking up this is after I lost some way party party yeah yeah and um she I farted on her and then she was like yeah let's do it so um we went in we were making out we were doing she was like grabbing my stuff and I was you know touching her boobs

back then touching boobs was such a big deal now it's kind of like eh I like they're there I still like him a lot? No, no, they're really pretty and I think they're beautiful and I, you know, if a girl, but from my experience, so many girls have been like if you suck on her tit or something, she's kind of like,

eh, like, whatever. Like, they don't really seem to fucking care at all. Okay, I've had one girl in my life who genuinely didn't care and it really made me sad. Yeah. What are you talking about?

If you're stuck on a titty and the girls doesn't respond, she's like, I don't feel anything, then it kind of ruins it. I've gotten that more than once. And then eventually I just kind of gave up. I was like, well, I thought I was sucking this because you enjoyed it. Yeah. Like, you know. It really just ruined my day. Anyway, so we were hooking up, and she was grabbing my

junk, and I was touching her booby. Nice, dude. Yeah. That's up. And then eventually, the pants came off, and she did this thing where she was, like, licking it. Like, from the side. I thought it was very erotic at first, where she was, like, kind of

licking the sides of it. And then she started blowing on it. Now, I don't know if you know this. Wait. But if you, no, literally. Does that consist of... I understand.

I understand. So, so essentially, I don't know if you guys can imagine this, but when she was licking it, it got very wet, yeah?

But then she blew on it, which made it very cold. It dry probably at some point? Well, it didn't go on that long. But I just remember it being so cold. Like, it was all wet, and then she's like,

it was like, what? How old was she? this was when you're 16 so maybe she I'm not even trying to be funny maybe she literally thought a blowdown it was like

so well no I didn't say anything to her at that point because I didn't want to be like I mean look there was something happening you didn't want to be like you're look you're an idiot yeah stop doing that

do this other thing because the alternative is what like no stop blowing on it like stick the whole thing in your mouth like and at that point I don't want to be like but I was whatever at the time I was just like okay

whatever something yeah it was something yeah so anyways I did ask her to stop and then we kind of finished making out. And we kind of hooked up a couple more times after that. And I think she figured it out eventually because that wasn't the case the next time.

But I had heard from somebody else that she had asked about it before. Like she told her friend like, yeah, we did this thing. And it was kind of weird. And it didn't seem like he liked it. And then she had explained that the first time she did think that it was sucking a dick. But apparently she sucked it so hard.

It was like apparently. So then that's why she thought she wasn't supposed to do it like that. Because it was all. almost like she was trying to suck the thing inside out. Like, you know, like, it's not like you're actually like, like a vacuum sucking. You know what I mean? Like, yeah.

It's not that. And so I think that was what she did the first time. And it was almost like, like, pulling the fucking inside of his dick out through the dick hole. I mean, that didn't happen, but that's what it hurt. So then the next time she did it. Oh, she was literally, she was inhaling the dick. I don't even think it was inhaling.

I think it was all just mouth suction pump edge. Sure, dude. But then the next time she did it was with me, apparently. So she'd just been starting to do it. But, I mean, she caught on very quickly. But, yeah, when we talk about the vacuum thing, I never stuck it in a vacuum, but my assumption is that that's what it kind of felt like.

If you don't have a ton of experience, and everyone's different on, like, how much, like, friction or how much, you know, pension they want. Like, some people, I've seen guys that are literally like, you know, tug it, you know, like, smack the shit out of it. Can I say? Yeah. Do you ever get the feeling with you, if she's so

shrieking, I feel like, let me, let me show you how it's done. You're like, no, But the exact same thing goes with girls. You're sitting there with your fingers just kind of like fill it around and they're like, just chill out. Just sit back. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I just, I'll do it. And it's weird because when girls do it, they always do it just like on the top part.

You know what I mean? Like they're doing it just right at the very tippy top. But whenever you talk about like quote unquote fingering girls, you know, guys are trying to fucking karate drop the inside of them. Like just like, co-c-c-c-c-c-c-coc! And it's like, well, clearly one feels better than the other. Yeah. So it's like why would you even Just tell me what to do

You finger the top to make her come you see Fast but the inside feels better overall No you stick your dick there and then you you can finger the top part One time I had sex Yeah It was good With a gorilla We came into your village

Turned out as a fucking monkey I hit the monkey with a stick The monkey scream I keep eating him His eye come out I scream too I put the stick in his brain I twist The monkey fall over

He died The monkey never come back And that was the first time Chris That said Yeah, I just stunting the tree I walk into their bleach The monkey village I find the odd this monkey

I fuck it It showed my dominance The monkey never fuck with me again Zach we should just ship you off to Africa I know that's a flutterer You'd be a tribal peckable, yeah.

Do you think, like, soon, like, some doctor will discover, like, a hormone to make you grow hair all of your body, like Sasquatch, and he'll do it to himself, and then he'll live in the woods, so people think he's Sasquatch? You mean, McLeower? I'm pretty much, I'm covered in hair. If I didn't shave every day, I would be a werewolf.

Really? Yeah. Yeah, but I'm saying, like, Sasquatch level. There is actually a thing that does it. Have you seen it? The circus guys? Yeah, yeah.

I mean, the hair grows all the way up to pretty much their eyeballs. Really? Yeah, you ever saw before? No. There were a whole bunch of brothers. It was like in Mexico or something. We can Google pictures later, but it's a real thing. It's a genetic, it's some genetic thing, but like all.

But it literally grows all over there. And it's like very kind of curly and dense too. It's not good here. Yeah, it's not, and it's not like a saskwash, like long, flowy, you know, whatever. It's like this like very tight, not QB-y shit, yeah. Oh, weird. Yeah. Yeah.

It's like an afro over your whole body. Yeah. Cool, dude. I don't know. Those, I mean, they're in the circus. Maybe they like that. I wonder if girls liked it. You know what?

I saw a fact. This is an actual biological fact that men have body hair to attract mates. You know what's fucking bullshit? Girls who are like, I like bald guys. It's like...

Fuck you, Zach. No, no, no, I'm serious. I'm serious. Fuck you. I'm serious. Shut up. I don't want to hear it. We explain.

Look, everybody here is baldy all right. We explain. I am the only one that's bald. Can be five years. Right. We ball and the end up with it. Point is, Whenever people see like a guy

when they come over, it's like, oh, just shave it off. Just be bald. Ball can look good. It's like, no. It's like, It's like, It's like,

You should shave it off if you gotta come over. But my point is They're like, girls fight guys with shapes head's attractive. It's the same girls and some people

were like, yeah, I like dirty guys. Like you like Bruce Willis and fucking Vin Diesel, you know, idiot. You don't, if you see a lumpy fucking doughy guy and he shaved his head

he just looks like his cancer now. Don't fucking lie. guys, we'd be honest. That's what I can't stand when you see that. I like guys to shave heads. Oh, it's like, no. They go be dubby and have acne and that'll be bald too. You fucking liar.

I think when girls say they like hairy guys too, I don't think they mean, I think they mean like they got a hairy chest. Yeah, exactly. It's like, I don't know. They've got like this like, you know, this very kind of picture perfect, like Wolverine. They want like Hugh Jackman. Yeah, it's like. Wolverine, yeah.

Yeah, you know what a hell of guys. You want fucking Hugh Jackman. The real hairy guys are the ones with like these straggly patches of fucking health alpha sprouts on their shoulders like me. And that is what it actually looks like when you're... If you're going to say you like a quality, say you, be honest, all right? Guys don't, is there equivalent

for guys to do that? I don't think guys really do that. No. I mean, oh, well, hold on. Guys will say they like guys like... Girls with small boobs. Some of guys like... Or big boobs or whatever. Or big boobs. Yeah, I guess we do that. We're all pieces of shit. And that's not always the case.

It's like, you say you like a girl with small boobs, but she's got a... You really just watch. like fucking nice looking titties what's that chick who uh you know what they're not Hollywood big boobs they're like you know what I mean yeah so when you say it's small sometimes you'll see like the 12 year old boobs and you're like oh you're clearly that's not what you're looking for some people have that yeah so you can't just be like oh yeah I like small boobs look all I'm saying is you're gonna be honest I'm saying

night love it was an inside job but the reptoids did it Reptoid, reptoid, where oh, where is reptoid? I wish there was a series about reptoid. All of reptoid's adventures. Besides 9-11, what else did Reptoid do? I think I prefer- What else did Reptoid do? I feel like Reptoid is a wayfully with a reptilian.

It's just such a stupid word. Do you think there's aliens among us, Zach? No. Not at all? I don't think we've ever made contact. Among us? I don't think we've ever made contact. Yeah.

I don't. But. I could be wrong. I feel like it would be a lot more like War of the Worlds where like if we made contact, like if they came to Earth, there would instantaneously be a huge outbreak either for them or for us.

It would really suck if like... There would be a microbe that we were carrying that would either wipe them out instantly or wipe us out. A good movie would be like if aliens came like a big warship but they were peaceful but they landed in like Iraq or something. Oh God. That'd be a sweet movie. This comes from...

Angus T. Jones. All right, Angus. Angus. What are you guys thinking by a hit show of two and a half men? Angus, is this really you? Is it the real? I wouldn't be surprised. It's the real Angus T. Jones, you guys. Fuck you, Angus.

You're no fan of us. Fuck off. What's the deal with the Big Bang Theory? How is that still a show? I've seen clips of it, and it's absolutely the worst fucking thing I've ever seen. Honestly, all it is is it's parents thinking that nerds are stupid and weird. But there's a lot of young people that like it. I really don't think there is.

There are, but it's also people who... It's people who don't understand nerd culture at all. Yeah, who I think it is. But they're the ones that... Look, I've seen a ton of young people say they love Big Bang Theory and they also claim to be self-reclaimed nerds. They're not. They want me.

It's them trying to live like vicariously through that show. Yeah, there's like, yeah, I'm a nerd. So you're not. You're not. It's like, yeah, I play the Legend of Zelda. It's like, wow. Look at you. Wow.

Good for you. Wow. And it is mostly. moms who are like, my son's like that. Yeah, and it's also parents wanting to feel connected to their kids. Really? If you wanted to feel connected to your kid, kill it. Go in his room, you suck his dick,

dude. Instant connection. What else I'm going to tell you? What else is a boy going to want? You know what I'm saying? Yeah, that show is honestly one of the worst I've ever seen. I just, you know, and I'm not trying to be like a hater, it's just, and maybe honestly, because I haven't actually sat through a full episode.

So that, I'm speaking from a very, you know, sheltered place here, but the clips that I see, as like highlights. Like sometimes I'll see them on Twitter or I'll see like something. Yeah. There is nothing that is, I've ever seen a clip from that show

that I was ever like, wow, that's even remotely funny. No, it's just, it, it's quite opposite. Most of the time.

Yeah. It feels very cringgy and forced. You've seen the, the big big theory without like a laugh track, right? Where they just kind of cut out those and it's just

really, really uncomfortable. No, I have. Well, that's any show. If you take away the laugh track,

like the timing gets fucked up to shit. No, no, but I mean like, Then you get to really see the jokes. Then you can like... Yeah, that's fine. With something like friends or like side films,

you're like, oh, okay, we're not the lap track. It's uncomfortable, but you can still see how the jokes work a little bit. Yeah. Whatever. But with that show, it's like, oh, wow, this is actually nothing. Like, the jokes are like, I want to play Super Mario Bros. There's a laugh track. You're like, what?

Why is that? Because everyone laughs after... So there's a laugh track for that show? Yeah. Because it doesn't look like it's shot, like, in front of a live studio audience. No, it's not. So why the fuck is there a laugh track? Oh, that happens to a lot of shows now.

Really? Yeah, there's a lot of shows like that. Yeah. Like what? I don't watch a lot of TV. There's a lot of shows like, uh, I'm pretty, like loads of old sitcoms do it. Friends wasn't shot in front of a live studio audience? Yeah, it was?

No, it wasn't. Friends? I thought it was. I don't think so. I thought Friends, Seinfeld. Really? Um, Frasier. I thought a bunch.

I know, I know Fresh Prince was because they had that one joke. Yeah, Fresh Prince. Fresh Prince? Because he had that one joke where he was really weird, like a fourth wall joke where they, it was like runs off the stage of runs through the audience. It was really bizarre. Yeah, I thought a bunch of those were shot before a live studio audience. It was very stupid.

I think, I think that's seriously like a night, 80. But you know what? Even if Friends wasn't, though, but even if Friends wasn't, the way it's shot, it looks like it's... They're trying to emulate it, basically. They're trying to get that episode. Right, but this show, this other one doesn't look like it's... Two and a half bed, too, is not shot from a...

Yeah. Did you ever see... I think it's how I met your mother? Did you ever see the compilation where it's like the laugh track? They repeat the same laugh track. Oh, really? Where it's like, they say a joke

and hear one guy going, ha, ho! And then they did it again and again. Ha ha, ha, ho. What? That guy fucked it up. Like, if he wasn't in the laugh truck,

you wouldn't be able to tell. He wouldn't be able to tell. It's fucking funny. I think what they do is that they get a group of people would do a studio and just have them laugh and cry and boo and stuff and just use that. Yeah, but I'm saying with this other show, the Big Bang Theory,

it shot like a modern show. They stopped. They stopped. They stopped. I think live studio audience is stopping at 80s in like 90s. The purpose of a laugh track

most of the time is to make the viewer feel like he's part of the laugh. It's okay to laugh. It's seriously like if you're saying stand up in your room compared to if you're in a theater

or something, it's a way different feeling because you have other people laughing with you. It's also like watching a comedy with friends or with by yourself. Right. Or even like a movie theater

is if you want to go that simple. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's usually those experiences are better because you tend to laugh with the audience. I feel like the actual theater like Broadway is a much better example of that kind of infectious. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

You wouldn't clap, maybe, but like all of a sudden, four other people are clapping over there, then everyone starts clapping, or the standing and then the laughing and shit, yeah. We did that when we saw fucking, Chris and I saw La Maze in New York. Yeah. They had this, there was like,

the ending of it was like a weird, it was like a standing ovation for like 10 minutes. And then the fucking actors came out, like the Lameez actors came out, they were like, help us fight AIDS. And we were like, what? Apparently they never do that. They're like, help us fight AIDS. AIDS kills people because it's AIDS. If you buy this AIDS poster, it's like, what the fuck? It was really weird.

Yeah, they like ruin the atmosphere was gone. It's a noble cause. No, it was like, I get it. It was just, it was the same thing. It was jarring as all. It's the same thing as putting someone at the end of a fucking cashier. It's like they're helping you so you pay them. It's like just don't do that. I'll donate it for one. Make it make it away some different way. I hate that shit. Yeah. Like I saw Lee Miz. I wanted to fucking feel like Lay Miz coming out of it. Not fucking fight AIDS. It is interesting that that's like the last taste you have. Exactly. Exactly. It's like you ate this beautiful cake

and at the very end there's like fucking penny. And you're like sucking on a penny at the end of it. They should have developed before the show, really? Yeah, yeah. That would have been perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Hey guys, AIDS is bad. Stop AIDS, by stop fucking. Join the revolution.

Yeah, yeah. Viva. No, A, whatever. And then they go into the show and it kind of they can kind of work it in. Yeah. I can't believe it did that. That's too bad. glad we didn't pay $300 for it. What? Oh, that's true, dude. All those shows have so fucking money. We bought, like, $30 whatever tickets.

We all set, we had really, like, shitty edge seats. Yeah. But, like, during the intermission. Everyone left. No, no, no. Oh. But in the middle of, like, the best seats in the house for, like, $300, $400 seats. The top three rows were completely vacant.

Yeah. And we were like, huh. Yeah. It was too, like, clean, cut, surgical for that to be, like, a group of people. Yeah. So we kind of made all the way over there and sat down. And these two girls. walked over when like

everybody was coming back from their mission and they're like did you bite? Did you pay for these seats? And I was like no and she was like okay other than I good and she so I like but it was funny so like by the time the the intermission was over like 30 or 20 like 20 people like a bunch of other people

were fucking criminals like us but it was a great show from the intermission onwards it was a good show before that too but that was a really you know before we fucking moved there was these fat bitches who wouldn't shut the fuck up there was these drug girls that a fucking Broadway show. They're like, oh my God, look at that.

There's a part where Valjean like rips his fucking jacket off and he's just big butt, or his stuff, and he's a big buff dude. And the girl went, she sort of kicking your legs. It was like a I was like, oh. Yeah, and whenever... Oh, like she was like, like, excited. Yeah, she was all like juicing up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was fucking,

music playing. They started doing like conductor like gestures. Yeah, they're like doing a doctor's, uh, condobeyed on them. Wow, they seem like, they seem like a, uh, like a parody of audience people. You paid to go see a Broadway show. And ruined it for other people.

What I think happened was, because that does it happen that off in a fucking Broadway show? I think what happened was they bought cheap tickets like we did. They did. And then they got excited before they went and got drunk. Yeah. Like some bar or something and then they came and they were too drunk or something. I squealed on the mic. What did you say? I was a dirty little squealer. I ran out.

The welder were being complete stupid bitches. Chris, what happened was, it was one of those weird things even without saying anything, I knew what he did? because he got through it. I was like, I think you said you're going to the bathroom. I think he even said that. Yeah. He was going to go into the bathroom, but I didn't see him come back to like, and while Chris was still gone, one of the guys, the people that are walked over.

Yeah. And was like, excuse me, could you please shut the fuck up? Thank you. Yeah. Whatever he said. And they're like, okay. And he just stood there for like a good five or ten minutes just watching him. Yeah.

And that made me really comfortable. But he ended up leaving Chris came back. Did they go back to their shenanigans? No, they stopped. And I was, I was just like, I knew Chris fucking did that. I fucking knew it. And after the show, he said, I was like, I fucking do it. I knew you did it.

Well, like, I didn't want to sit there and have them ruin the entire thing. And the innovation was like, Chris, those girls, some guy came over and told me quiet. He was like, really? He was trying to, he was trying to go to the luncheon a lot. I was going to tell you. I just wanted to see. I just thought it was funny, though. It's true, though.

Those experiences, you know, for some people, they can only afford to go to, like, you know, one Broadway show. It was, like, the one show of ever wanted to see. It's a fucking Broadway show. Shut up. I've been me and Zach have been obsessing over like last year and we're finally going to see it and then these stupid fat cunts walk in and ruin it I honestly hope they die I hope they died the real world The good news is Chris, Chris play us up with uh

Chris Chris Chris play us out Randy Nuben okay