SleepyCabin - SleepyCast S2:E28 - [It's Been a Long Ride]

Episode Date: May 24, 2019

Cory and Jeff visit California, joining Chris, Zach, and Mick. And the rest is history. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Your hosts for the evening: Chris (www.youtube.com/user/OneyNG) Zach (www.youtube.com/user/psychicpebbles) Jeff (www.johnnyutah.newgrounds.com) Cory (www.youtube.com/user/Spazkidin3D) Mick (www.youtube.com/user/ricepiratenewgrounds) Additional music by the amazing Kevin MacLeod: https://incompetech.com Podcast editing by: Mick +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Much love, you guys. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ SleepyCabin Official Site! www.sleepycabin.com SleepyCabin on YouTube! www.youtube.com/SleepyCabin Stay tuned on Facebook! www.facebook.com/SleepyCabin ...or Twitter! twitter.com/sleepycabin +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ We're on iTunes, too. Cuz why not.

Welcome to Sleepy Cabin episode The finale, right? Just go right to the chase. Just right to the fucking chase. I don't know if this is the... We discussed it, right? No, it's over 28, I checked. Wait, really?

Yeah, that's why I said if we could get one more. Because this fucking limerod made it 27B. You fucking... Yeah, fucking side A, side B. I wanted you guys to be... Hey, Mick, put the fucking track over, Mick. Welcome to the 1961 technology. Dome Skull.

It's called a whole new podcast. You know what, Mick. I don't know what you ever brought you on. Ooh. You don't know that episode. There is a world as tangible as our own. Impossible to see yet. Unavoidable to sense. A world enveloped by a seemingly unending ocean of forests.

Very deep in that forest, tucked away neatly within a blanket of twilight, lies a quaint little cabin. And in that cabin... It's a bunch of guys. He's a bunch of bullshit. Hey! Everybody is me, Korn Spanakis. Do a sleep cabin?

Who! Yeah! Hey. Wow. I waited two years for that. I don't even know what I just said. Hey, it's Corey Speskin. We're doing...

Let's put subtitles up for you. Episode 29 of Sleepy Cabin, 29, 28. Let's put creepy-ass bootie-ass subtitles up for me. Dead Russian language. The fucking music. I'm here with Zach Hadole. It's true. Docks.

Or psychic pebbles. Way to docks. Corey Delaminge's. Me. Cory Delamengis. Jeff Jeff, Utah. Johnny Utah.

Sorry, I haven't said our user names in a long time. You looked at your eyes went dead for a moment. I'm confused because you went to another dimension. Yeah, you can go to be there. Hey, though. Jeff, Bangling.

Johnny Utah. I'll just say Johnny Utah. Jeff. Chris O'Neill. Oh, thanks. That's one. That's wonderful. And Mick, uh, rice pirate, Lauer.

Yeah. All right, there we go. Perfect. No, that was horrible. You know, it's been a long time. It makes sense. It has been a long time. Rusty or in the...

You ever get embarrassed? Your name sounds like flour. Ha ha ha ha. That wasn't even funny. What are you fucking laughing for? You should literally leave right now. That was bad, dude. That wasn't funny at all.

It didn't even more fucking funny are yet. Whatever. I saw your balls shrivel into your pants when I said that. Mixed balls were sticking out of both pant legs and sucked back in. Stop staring at my balls. I can't. You're spreading into me. Look at the way you're sitting. Look at you.

Your long eyelashes. Look at the way you're sitting. Oh my god. Stop. Stop. Sorry, okay. If Mick was a Meta black alien, won't he be if he took his head off? Like a weird little...

It looked like you, Zach. You'd be like a little... A weird chite of it. Yeah. A little copper alien. Copper alien. Whatever. How do you even pronounce your last name? Corey?

It's like La Croy, right? Can I say this? La Croy. Lausannea. Okay. Dumbass. Corey lasagna. Perfect.

Okay, enough of the chit-chat. Let's get down to the chit-chat. Let's get down to the chit-chat. We should have the breast time. We should, we won, we were saving the story. We didn't really tell the details. It was something that happened. It was really funny.

Probably something that'll never happen to me again in my life because I don't feel like this could happen. Didn't fucking happen to you. Well, it kind of did. But mine was worse. No, you set it up. No, it's funny. What the fuck happened?

The antithesis of the story is hilarious in Chris's the side. But it's funny how it all sets up. We need to this story. I don't even know what I just said. We need to rewind time a little bit. Or a dimension version of the story? Start this story. I don't know.

When it gets to the juicy part, I'll give the super details. Should we start about how it all started where you were like watching a certain thing? Take us back. Oh shit. Okay. We're back in time. We're sitting in the living room.

Corey's visiting. It's like the first time we've hung out in like a long time. So I was like Corey's this fucking, this weird guy on Twitter that I don't know who he is. Sent me a YouTube channel. And he told me to promise not to name it so I won't. But it is. It is. Wait, just tell me, I'll bleep it out.

But I want to hear it. What was it? Okay. I thought it was Now I got to bleep it twice But it's a YouTube channel Made So that autistic people can post videos

And enjoy You know, releasing content Be a part of the community But me and Corey Specifically enjoy that culture Of videos You appreciate it A little too much

Your connoisseurs So I'm like I'm not saying we laugh at them But goddamn We laugh directly at them. They can be funny. No, but they made a video that's, it could literally be picked up by adults when. Yeah, no, it is brilliant.

It's there's something about autistic people. Look, I'm not gonna feel bad. They're fucking hilarious when they want to be. Yeah. But they have a sense of writing that cannot be matched. No, it's like, they're in danger. Yeah. We could show you it.

It's hilarious. Are they trying to be funny? They are sometimes, but... Sometimes they try. Okay, so Corey also discovered that they have the specific style of humor that, humor that just so happens to be used by the nostalgia critic and like Linkara and all these guys. If you see movies like Kikasia and suburban, suburban legends, knights, whatever the fuck is going. You can just tell that, like, you know, they will say certain things, like, they will try to be like the cool, snarky protagonist.

Yeah. They'll always be sarcastic, be like, what is this? This is weird. It's always like that kind of a thing. Oh boy, here we go again. Here we go again. It's always that kind of a thing, right? But anyway, we were watching that, we were laughing, we were belly rubbing, we were having the good times.

Bell, rubbing our belly. This is the setup. So the next day, we all decided to go to Knott's Berry Farm, right, which is a theme park. We're trying to get Jeff to go, but he's like, eh, nah. Can I bring up the fact that when you guys told us it was Natsbury Farms, every single person thought we were literally going to a berry farm. Every person I do. Yeah, we're going to go fucking smush berries. Well, tweet berries.

I would absolutely do that by the way. Really? You guys want to go to a berry farm? You guys want to go to a berry farm? It's actually a pretty good theme park. It was. It was cool. It was good.

I heard every single fucking ride you guys I said! Okay, let me get to that. Let me get to that. Okay, I'm going to get to it. So we all put on our boots, we all go out and get in the car. We drive for like an hour to get there, right? We show up, we wait around in line for like 30 minutes, finally get in.

Why didn't you whip out your only card and be like I'm only from Onie place? Mr. Knott's, fucking... Mr. Nott's fucking... Mr. Nott's cares not about me. It was you and Corey, and I ditched. Yeah, yeah. Jeff ditched, right? We were like, fuck Jeff, big fucking blowjob faggot.

Jake originally was with him, but he also bailed because he didn't have enough room. So it was me, Veronica Corey, Lexi, Waffle, and that was, and that was it, right? That was it. No, and her brother, David. And David, Veronica's brother, David. And David. And little Jeremy was his luck. He got lost. But, uh, so.

Never found again. Yeah. We finally get into the park, right? It's a hot day, right? Very hot. So we're just like walking around. It takes like five minutes to find the first ride. It's like some ghost train thing. Veronica's like, it's the best ride ever. We get up to it and it's like, we walk through the line. We're like, where the fuck is everyone?

Get to the end of the line. It's like, oh, this ride's broken. You can leave now. We're like, cool. So we walked like five, ten minutes to the next ride. What was this one? It was called. The Silver Bullet?

Silver Bullet. We get to that. We're literally in line. We wait in a sweaty line. So you're in line. Kids for like 30 minutes. Get to the front. The ride breaks down in front of us, right?

We're also like, are you fucking serious? right and then the people on the the people on the on the prompter like we're like what the fuck are they saying that's what they did they were literally like everyone's like we can't fucking understand you know that they know that you can't

definitely they do it I was thinking they didn't say there was any difficulties we just said like we're currently experiencing like no they were like we don't know what's going on just wait around we're like at least that's what you think they said no right piece together while you say that I was literally thinking maybe that is like a weird theme park

tactic to get people just to be like, what, what, we what? And, like, they confuse you, just so you wait around a little bit. But anyway, we waited for, like, 50 minutes while it was broken down, and then they did it again, and went, and we're just like... Wait for the same ride? Yeah. What the fuck were you standing there waiting for that ride? Because they said it would be... Because they said it might come back.

Oh. We got that bit at the end. But then after 50 minutes... Is anybody working on, or you guys just waiting and love while nobody... Every ride... Every ride is operated by morbidly obese women. Like, I'm not even kidding. That's fucking beautiful, gross. It's a new way. That's fucking the most beautiful shit I've heard.

But anyway... Let me tell you something. That's not exactly a good thing for the ending of this. Corey, what's that beautiful? Oh. All right, no spoilers, please. But a 900-pound beautiful god-ass with a fucking cane. With four tennis balls on the end of it.

Not all the fucking wrong buttons. Not fucking causing a lot. It's a fucking spark. But anyways... A fucking Nintendo shit cube was messing with the... Cory. Yes. Anyway.

No, no, it's cool. Anyway, we're like... This place fucking sucks. And I was in a really bad mood at this point, right? I'm already getting tired from the sun. I'm getting a little burnt. I haven't eaten yet. So we're walking to the next ride.

It takes 10 minutes to walk to the next ride. And it was called La Revolucion, right? We wait in line for like 30, 40 minutes. Even though it's one of those basic rides that you just, like you get on it, it spins around for a bit and then you get off. It's like a teacup thing. It spins and goes back and forth like those pirate things. It's like a ship with teacups.

So you're spinning around. and it's swinging up and down. This sounds so fucking terrible. You got up early in the morning. You got up early in the morning. Packed everybody in a car, drove an hour out to this place. We should also say...

Two rides so far or no-goes. This is also important. Like, Veronica covered like half the tickets. Yeah. Because, like, you know, we were going to pay her back after everything. So she, it was $300. $300.

To essentially waste our fucking time. So far's been like five hours since you, like, started your journey. Yeah. Both rides aren't working. You would stand in line. Those are roller coasters. Yeah, they were both roller coasters.

Like the main attractions, pretty much. right? So we're waiting in this line now, right? We're just waiting around and we notice like, wait a minute, this ride like, it's taking a really long time to get on, like, what is going on? So we're, like, looking over two massive, like, morbidly obese, ogre women walking back and forth,

like, looking confused, scratching their tits. And then, like, flicking flies off their noses and shit. That's fucking hot. So we're just like, no, we started looking at them, right? And they're literally walking, like, so fucking slowly to get people on and off each of the seats, right?

There's a row of four seats per like hanging capsule of this thing, right? You sit in a capsule with four or with three of your friends, so four people, and we're just like, why are they fucking walking so slowly? They're just like, they just stumbling. And then they fucking, we wait around. It's really rude. They could have diabetes. They could have fake feet. All of them definitely have diabetes.

They're all definitely made of 40% wood. Maybe they should have got longer fucking tennis ball canes because it was a long wait. That's all I'm saying. No, right? And they've all got like bibs with barbecues. But like, no, at this point, at this point we're like, what the fuck is taking so long, right? We're getting really antsy and annoyed. Of course, spent hours in the hot sun.

Especially me. I'm like, I'm a cranky boy when I haven't eaten, right? So we get to the front of the queue and now it's about to happen again. We literally see them say something like, uh, don't let them on. We're like, are you fucking serious? And we're like, uh, right? And but then they're like, oh wait, no, no, no, there's four, let them on. So we're like, thank you, right?

Yeah. So it's five of us. So we all can't fit on. one. So Corey, Lexi, and Waffle sit in one capsule with a random person. Oh, with David. And then me and Veronica sit on a capsule with one random person and an empty seat, right? Okay. So it takes 10 minutes to get us on, get us buckled. They're walking back and forth going, uh, uh, does your seat work? It's like, yeah, it's like, yeah, it's like, yeah. It's like, yeah, it's like, yeah. It's like, yeah. There was children who were holding up. Yeah. Yeah, they're like, pull it down, lift it up. Yeah, they made us do that like, they made us do that, like, they made us do that. It's like, we're like, we're like, they're like, they're just like, like, they're just like, like, they're just like, they're just. Yeah. It was children who were holding on. That's how we're gonna fucking die? Like, they didn't know what's going on. No, right? So finally, finally.

Finally. The fucking ride, we pull down the things that keep you locked in so you don't like flap out and die. And it starts moving slowly. Thank God. We're like, yay, right? Clear sailing. But then, right, within a minute, Veronica starts screaming, right?

I'm just like, what the fuck is your problem? She's like, it's not supposed to go this high. And I'm just like, what are you talking about? And like, it goes really fucking high. Like five times in a row. Yes. It's supposed to hit its peak once. And then I'm just up.

Is it swinging? Is it swinging battleship or that pirate ship that goes back and forth? It's like going to the point where it can't go no more. And it's like clanking up against the meat. And then it's going back around and doing it. It did it five times.

So I'm fucking, I'm screaming my fucking mind, my eyes and everything. I can't even believe what's going on. And I had no idea. I thought this was just like, oh, maybe I'm just overthinking it. Yeah.

So then it does this five times, right? And I'm just like, I'm enjoying myself because it's like, if I'm going to die, it might as well be like this. This is fun. Getting flung into fucking the stratosphere on a fucking pirate ship, Knotsbury Farm ride. Yeah, right?

So then we're like, see, Veronica, you're just being a big baby, right? And then it's just like slowing down. But then it gets to this point where it doesn't stop. It just keeps like swaying back and forth and back and forth. It eventually stopped. No, wait, wait. Corey, before that, it did this for 15 minutes. Yeah, it wouldn't stop.

15 minutes, it swayed back and forth, right? And then look over at Corey's look. I was so sick because I was doing this and it was like this and it right that. I'm gonna die. Ronica's brother David is like spitting little bubbles out and spitting it onto the floor because he's about to throw up. Hell out of the ground are you at this point. They drop the floor. So the steel floor lowers down for you to start the right.

So the floor is still down. We're hanging about five, six feet off the ground, right? Yeah. So we're still swaying back and forth and now I'm just like, this is fucking hilarious, right? But then the girl on my right, she starts going, Log right, log right, log right, log right, log right, log right, log right. She was either saying, saying log ride or long ride?

I think it was long ride but she's going long ride, long ride, long ride, was there even a log ride at the fucking... Yeah, there is, there is. Maybe she, okay, like... She might have been, so it's one or the other. I think it was long ride, because it's been like 20 minutes on this fucking ride now, right?

We're all trapped, I can't even move, no arm room. Right, and I'm noticing like, fuck, she's autistic. Yeah. Fuck, I'm trapped on this with, like, a screaming autistic person. How long is this gonna- That's like your Twilight Zone?

No, I know. You deserve every second of that. It was the setup. This is what we're saying. That's what we had to have the intro. No, right. So in my mind, I'm like, please don't let her start scratching. Don't let her start screaming. Don't let her start doing all this shit, right? And I'm just like, then I look over to Corey and Lexi, who have noticed her, and they're both laughing at me. They're like, you fucking deserve this. I'm just like, no! She turns around and looks you dead in the eyes as she says that. No, she never said a word to me the entire time, but she did for like, I think we were stuck on it for an hour straight.

It was an hour. No way. Yes. We'll tell you why. Somebody shat themselves on that ride. No, you'll see. That's what I was saying. Dude, I have to blame. I have a little baby. Can I like kind of like take a little bit? Alright, so people started showing up. They're like, oh, we have an issue in case you didn't know. We're like, uh, water because there's sun and they're just like, you're like, oh, okay. And like the dude like Dave next to me, it's like, I'm gonna puke because it was like, Chris was in the sun.

Yeah. We were kind of in the shade. I was in the sun for an hour. So one side of my head was completely pink and red. Oh God. It was bad. And then they showed up with like so we know the big people right they were still like fucking mosing around like they were at Golden Corral They have nothing to worry about you met for a second You said like they were a race of people like the big they are a race of people We're just walking around pressing buttons hoping something work they were walking back and forth Oh yeah and then like some people showed up Some people showed up and they had like this big like metal thing and they went up to like one person's thing and started poking it and then like

It's not working a hole and we're like they free like like two people after 30 minutes. It's like maybe you should think of a new fucking plan. Yeah, I know, and this is the fucked up thing is that the entire time they're like getting people off. This autistic girl next to me is going, look right? And she did that once and I was like, God, fucking please no, right? I'm like resting my ear on the padded foam to like make myself deaf in one ear so it's not hurting my ears bad. And then there's a point where they're getting one person off every five minutes, counterclockwise to exactly to where we were. started next to us, so we're dead last in this whole thing, right?

Yeah. So they got off one capsule of people, and then I went, hey, hey, she needs to get off, right? And then everyone else was like, yeah, she needs to get off. Aw, you were looking out for her. Technically, yes, right? Yeah. No, that was. That's not selfless.

That's not selfless, okay? Like, I wanted her to get off, right? But I also know that she should have gotten off first, right? Would you have been equally okay if she got hit in the head with something and passed out? No, no. Did they let you off with her? You do just want her to get off. That's the thing, right?

Here's another funny thing. So I say get her off pretty much, right, in a nice way. And then they come over, they unscrew Veronica out. I'm like, why you fucking start with Veronica? Why, right? And then they unscrew me out and then her. And then as I'm like walking out, this guy was like, oh, it's convenient, you got to get off too, huh?

And I was like, fuck you asshole. So fucking mad. I was like, why didn't they just go for her first? I actually think I did that, hey, hey, get her off. And then they did it. someone else and I had to do it a second time for them to finally do it right yeah I mean like there was people who were baking in the in the sun so when they got to me I was like you need to get these people who are dying in the sun over there a

little girl was crying yeah the girl was bawling and they freed her first did I guarantee so pissed myself with that for an hour one hour you probably oh absolutely bouncing around yeah swinging back and forth clanging against the top of the bar there was like a little kid who clearly didn't look like he was the size that should be fitting in there yeah he was pissed like he's just like after Hell was, when the girl was like screaming with Loggeron, he's like, you need to shut up. Did he really? Yes. Oh my god. He was just like, I didn't hear that. He was this kid. He was like a little eight year old. He's like, when they freed like the girl was crying, he's like, I'm next.

And he's right next to his dad. His dad's like kind of like I didn't hear that. Yeah, it was funny. But like you got these things at your crotch pushing up so you don't slip out. Yeah, and it's like it hurts your ball so much and like you can't even like move your arms. It's like you're like caged by a big giant hand or something. You can't move. It sucks. This reminds me of that Twilight episode. where the guy has a bomb shelter and there's that, they're having a dinner party, but then they hear that there's going to be a nuclear bomb, so then he goes into his shelter but all his neighbors try to go in and he like tried to lock them out. But just basically how like humans become absolute psychos

when like the conditions are right. Like if people are dehydrated and baking the sun and swinging around on a ride for an hour, that they just start turning on each other. Yeah, the conditions have to be slightly, slightly off to what they should be. Wait, but there's like a perfect... All stability goes out the window.

There's a perfect conclusion is when we got off that ride. Did the girl thank you? No, that's the thing. Her carer came over wearing a, like, autism t-shirt, and she said, that must have been so horrible for you. I'm so sorry. And in my mind, I'm just like, I completely deserved it. Completely deserved this.

And then we tried getting a refund and tried to go home. I wait to wait around another hour to wait for that. Yeah, we had to wait for that. Did you get a refund? Yeah. Actually, no. She said we did, but her money never got returned. Are you fucking serious, dude?

So thanks, Nots. Well, now we have it recorded. Fuck them. Welcome to Ottsbury Farm. Yeah, no, it's like, it was pretty concerning when we went in, like, after that. I mean, they gave us complimentary water,

which was nice at the very fucking least, but we'd been there for an hour in the sun. Complementary water. Yeah, complimented by water bottles. And it's like, we... You would think, like, at that point, they'd be like, here's a free fast pass for the rest of the day.

Anything, anything. Yeah. But we weren't going to do that, because at this point, it's like Final Destination 2. Our heads are going to be fucking locked off if we got on a roller coaster. Also, he would have died on the next fucking thing. We all passed out on the car on the way back.

Like, we were so tired. Yeah. You know, maybe those two rides before this one were signs. You know that story about how like the guy who drowns waiting for God to save him? You know, there's like a flood and he's on his roof. And the guy comes by with a little paddle boat. And he's like, come on in.

I can save you. He's like, no, no, no, I'm good. I'm gonna pray to God. God'll save me. And then another guy comes in with another boat, like a motor boat. He's like, come on, you gotta get in before the water rises. He's like, no, I'm gonna wait for God.

And then finally the water rises all the way and he drowns. And he goes to heaven. He's like, God, why didn't you fucking save me? I prayed you three times. And he's like, I tried twice. Yeah, you're dumb idiots. You idiot. It's like, what?

Did you think the beams would pick you up? Like an alien, you'd be saved that way? I think, I think that this was your signs. Absolutely. I fucking think the same thing because, like, after that, I physically wouldn't get another ride. I was terrified of the outcome that would have happened. Yeah. I feel like after something like that.

I'd be scarred a little bit. It was scary. It wasn't that. I mean, the last ride was that bad, but... It's not, like, the setup wouldn't be so bad, like, if there were two rides that crashed, then the last one worked, I'd be like, okay, we had two shitty rides that didn't work. Yeah. But this was in a row, and it escalated ever so slightly.

It was like, we couldn't even get to the ride the first time, and the second time, we got to the ride, but it crashed. The third time, we got on the ride, but it crashed. The fourth time is, what can you go from there? Death. Never got to go back to run. It's like the five stages of death. But it was... It was a good day.

It was fun, sort of, whenever you got past everything, when you didn't get, like, fucking burned and at the next to someone who gave you definite hearing and shit. What did you actually do that was fun, though? Nothing. That was it. I love how you're like, yeah, no, but it was fun day. It was fun. It was a fun story to have for the podcast.

That's what you got out of it. Yeah, no, so that's the one benefit of having that. That's your $300 story. Yeah. I went to a bookstore. Oh, yeah, you got off Scott free, Jeff. I had fun. If you had a yes man and said yes, you would have the worst day of all time.

Jeff was, he had that final destination moment when all you guys were like, come on, we're all going to Natsbury Farm. I just have this. You already saw it. Yeah, he saw the whole thing happen. Long ride! You're like, long ride! He saw himself sitting next to the girl with autism screaming, long ride, long ride, long ride, long, and like it zapped him back in time. And he was back in his room.

Like, oh, fuck. And then he got the call. Hey, we're going to Natsbury Farm. He's like, oh, fuck this, I'm going to a book store. Man, her voice was genetically engineered to be perfectly annoying. It was like, it was. It was like certain... Terrible.

It's really strange that they were able to free, like, people. Yeah. And the funny thing is, like, these people who work at the place were coming over with a small screwdriver prying the fucking thing. And they're like, I don't know what's happening.

Then they show up with ladders, and they freed everybody after that. It blows my mind. Like, they couldn't get us out. It was, like, seven people. And I was, like, smash the fucking wires and make all the things turn on,

or make a spin to death or something. It really took a while. Yeah, it was ridiculous. But, uh, How would you rate Knott'sbury-Farl in Yelp? I would rate it a negative-3. The first time I went was good. Okay.

And then this time was not. So maybe a 3 out of 5. Okay. Yeah. That's fair. Or 2.5, you know what? I think when rides start closing down. Yeah.

And there's like... Right before your eyes. Yeah. You know what? I think it's time to close the park for... That's why I don't like theme parks is because they can have rides break down and you don't get reimbursed at all. It's like I paid to ride on rides.

So what the fuck am I doing here? Those lines. I went to, uh, I went to an event for, um, there There was a company sponsored an event, and it was over at the Harry Potter World, which is pretty close by. There was nobody there. It was just the company. Yeah. So, like, just getting up there with nobody in front of you still took like 15 minutes to get to the fucking... No, dude, some rides take an hour or two.

Yeah, they do. It's retarded. These winding, snaking fucking lines. Who the fuck pays to do that? I don't get it. Fast pass, and it's like still waiting to some degree. You have to have, like, a plastic bag to pee in while you're fucking waiting in those lines. It's fucking silly.

What's funny is, like, on the silver bullet, they actually had something on the TV, which is, probably clever but also conniving in some degree. Caniving? Yeah, because it was like making chicken wings and like deep frying them and showing people eating that stuff on a TV while you're in line. And they were showing people drinking stuff and it's like that is imagine if you were at a concert. Yeah. And while you're watching a concert, fucking McDonald's ad popped on and some dude was eating a burger. You'd been there for 11 hours. You'd be like this is evil. And that's like the beginning of a movie when they show you like the popcorn and the Coca-Cola's and all that shit, except that would be running the

entire time on the side screen while the movie was going. Exactly. So it's like a very like wow. No, we're definitely in a California theme park. Yeah. Like they're they're, they're squeezing any little bit out. Can we talk about the moral dilemma of that? Log rides? No, no, like laughing at autism. If you laugh at an autist, on one hand, you watch your back because you may be drowning in a fucking water and they'll be knocking going log ride. Yeah, who's the next target, Chris? Is it evil? Is it evil to laugh at autistic humor? No, the thing is,

Like, it's not fair. Look, if you're laughing at a person. No, I'm like, that's the thing. I'm not like, you're a fucking loser. I'm laughing at the behavior. God designed us to laugh at stuff like that. What's what I always said? If a regular person said

some of the something of an autistic person said it would still be funny. Yeah, exactly. I'm laughing because it's funny. It's the comedy of the delivery. Like when a bear is about to be captured, it's like, oh no, Joe, about be captured. And then he gets captured.

You can't write that. You can't write that. It's like, uh, It's perfect. Another reason is because I actually genuinely enjoyed autistic shit as a kid. I grew up enjoying Sonic and the nostalgia critic I'm not against... I'm on the spectrum for sure. I figured you guys are just hate watching that stuff. I'm 100% autistic if you look at the shit I'm into But at the same time it's like I also appreciate it in some next level where I could never make anything on this level This is like an art form that you can't reach unless you have a certain mindset You legitimately can't think of the things they think of you can't do it even nostalgia critic tries and he still can't do it

He can't play the part. He's got nothing. I don't think he's quite as bad as some of the people. He's not fully autistic. He's on the spectrum. He's on the spectrum, but he's... He still files like W-9s and shit. He's not like dysfunctional.

He files W-9s, but he has his big-lipped alligator memes. What the fuck is that called? That's a reframed. What the fuck is a big-lip-aligator moment, Zach? Yeah. What the fuck does that mean? How do you not know what that is? I don't know what that is.

That's important. That's important in NC history. What is it? And then solved it. It's like the back credit. The bat credit card? A bat credit card? Bat nipples? I remember that? Did you say big lift crocodile? No, so do you remember the movie? I think it's Ferngoly. Was it the Ferengoli? There's a part where a big-lipped alligators walks out of the trees and starts singing and then leaves.

He's like, it's a big-lipped alligator moment. Chris, you'd be cool as if we're saying the fucking... I thought you were about to say you are autistic. You are autistic. Chris, listen, you are autistic. Would you want to sing I'm a girl reviewer on the internet? I'm a girl reviewer. I'm a review... I'll fucking love that, dude.

Everybody go. Goatwell, you'll have the chance. Look up a girl reviewer, a guy reviewer on the internet song. And then look up Guy beheaded live on television. Look up ISIS guy fucking hit with F-16. What's an F-16? Jeff, what's the worst thing we've shown you? I mean, I still remember you talking about... Markiplier cries on fucking camera.

Yeah. Jeff, I want to know. All right, that was up there. That's the most annoying thing we've shown you that you just hate. Something that's stuck with me. I think you pulled up... It wasn't so much the video, but your reaction to it was like, you pulled up a guy. I think he got his head.

chainsaw off and then they used it as a soccer ball and you laughed at it. What? What? What? When was this? This sounds like a Zach video. I will not fucking like, I don't think of that laughing. Zach sends us these... I don't even remember this video. Send it to you on your phone. You're a liar. You're in the middle of church. You fucking... No, that is. You made that up. I don't think I did.

Maybe I did. I don't know. I think what happened. I think you're getting that from a story that Stamper said where you and I were watching a video. I think that's what I I don't think I, I don't know if I saw the actual video, but I just remember you talking about this. I don't I don't fucking remember this. I think Stanford was complaining because we were watching a video. You were like, look at this. We all had that office together. You were like, look at this.

And it was like, I could kick you a fucking human head around. I don't remember. Yeah, it was in the sleeping guy. I was like, man, I can't even look at that. I can't either. He was like watching porn gives on his computer. Man, I can't look at that. Look, I can look at Gore and I can, like, you know, be fine with it.

But I don't even remember them. I don't think we were laughing at it. But he was like, man, that's sick, man. I'm going to fucking beat. Zach's been on this kick where he's been. texting pictures with this big fact naked guy's nuts to us. Yeah, I sent it. He fucking, he's been embedding it into messages.

It's just like, hey, you're going to the gym today? Yeah, see you there? And then he follows it up with like this big face. The shot is like from his scrot him up. So you're like looking at this guy and you can like see this barely half of his face over the belly. And then he like embedded it in like a news article too. Yeah, because I sent it a couple times and they kept the stop falling for it. And then I embedded it.

Then we started blocking him. Photoshop. Have you ever seen the picture of the old man with purple pants pissing into his own mouth? No. That's a really funny picture. Do you just randomly text that to people? I used to. That's what I reminded me of.

Zach, I remember. Oh God, he's going to show you. Here's a Jim group chat. And that's the actual image. I kept, I kept, and then eventually I said this one, they were like, I was like, holy shit, you guys check. I was like, holy shit, do you guys

check the news today? and I said that. Oh, God. I just love his expression. He's just like... And you know what? You're sitting there, you wake up first thing in the morning,

ready to go to the gym. You're that fucking idiot. And then you fucking see that. God damn it. It looks like a fucking bus driver. Leave him alone. Yes, they've seen it in. Oh, really.

I can't find the purple pants, man. Zach, that's what's funny about you. Perfect way to ruin your morning. You have, like, heated discussions. Well, you used to have, like, heated discussions on Twitter. And then you would just post naked men. Like, naked men. A lot of naked old men over the ears.

Yeah. Fat old naked guys suck into his cock is the weirdest thing to me. That is weird. You're right. No, seriously, here's why it's weird. Even when you're 80 years old, you must look at them and go, oh, I'm old. I'm like, I'm fat and old. You don't ever not think that.

You know what I mean? Yeah. So you'd still think, you'd still be judging you as if you're 20 years old. So those guys still are, they know they're sucking other fat old man nicks. They're not like, oh, this is amazing, young, delicious cock. The older you get, the less you care. It's probably less, but you still know it when you look at it. The only thing going through my head when you say it is they probably look like a weird fleshy version of a yin-yang symbol.

Just because there's like a big ball of flesh. Oh, it's fucking bad. Oh, it's bad. Old man sucking fucking each other. Old man sucking cock? What the hell? I've seen like when someone was to do that, they would take like smelling salts if push came to shut. What?

What do you mean smelling salts? Like sometimes like if something is really bad, they'll like sniff something in order to do it. Are you saying fat old guy snips off before they suck each other? I'm saying. Like he would normally. do it? He's like, oh, this is this is kind of gross. And then he takes a whip and he's like, all right, give me that yummy wiener. Exactly.

Because the smell is too much. You guys are silly. Jeff, he came all the way out to the West Coast for this. Yeah. Some smelling salt. Yeah, I know. Guys, here's, the group smelly salt. That'll be the setup. You send smelling salt and then he starts throwing

the grandpa dicks. I posted that picture the chat of Brandon, who's also one of our guys, he was like, dude, talk to Bigotola. They don't like it when you You said it. I was like, I mean I said it twice as like that. You should have said that. You said it like four sets.

Brandon's really straight cut. Yeah, he was like, hey, you know, I like that. I think that's funny, but I don't think they like it. Yeah, you know what? I didn't investigate this part. Jeff, you said you had a story. Yeah. And we've been like, fucking screaming and ranting.

All right, Jeff. Oh, it's my turn. Oh, it's my turn. It's my turn to shine. Sorry, sorry. We were like... Spotlights on me. We all.

We were bored last night and... Boy. One thing. I don't know. We started kissing and touching and... Yeah, lots of men. I just started gaping. I don't know.

It was weird. Start gaping onto a camera. Close your eyes. It feels like a girl's up. Never mind. Tell me your story. We were bored. Who?

Myself and Reese. Right. Who's Reese? Describe this guy at five words or less. A very... A very... A very... A very handsome British man.

You'd throw me off here. We went to a strip club. What? What? Wow. Last night? Yes. Damn.

Did you actually hear about this earlier? I didn't. I didn't hear anything about this. I heard you say it. Yeah, yeah. You got someone else to gape. I left at like 10 o'clock. When the fuck did you guys go?

Midnight. Oh, okay. It was a full moon. Yeah, we were bored and we looked at we googled Best strip clubs in Burbank. You yelped strip clubs. Yeah. For the reference, Burbank is full of like retired people.

So you didn't even find you, no, that I changed it to Glendale and it wasn't any better. It was like, started out of five. Girls were hot, but it's sweaty butts. So I go in, we find this place, and we go in, and the first thing was they don't have alcohol. Yeah. What?

Which I wasn't aware of. Wait, really? Well, I don't know if that's all West Coast, but Seattle was the same. It's dry bar. I mean, I went to a strip club in Missouri and they had alcohol. Well, wait, was there contact here? Yeah. See, so that's the thing is sometimes if they have contact, then they don't have alcohol. And some other places, they'll serve alcohol, but then there's, like, a no-contact rule.

All I saw. was the star rating in the name. I didn't know I didn't know if it was like all nude or not but it was. So we go in and then they're like what drink would you like? What drink would you like? I'm like I don't want anything because it was like

No there's a minute. Yeah yeah. Oh yeah it was water Red Bulls like O'Dul's like a non-alcohol beer. So we both got a fucking water. We were sitting there lame assholes just like sipping bar water under these black lights. Your $10 water. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. You were two

like super white dudes shipping water in an Armenian club cool Jeff so these girls came over and their first thing they're like oh it's like it's been a while since we haven't seen like a like a not fat Armenian like like they're basically like two like we used to like fat Armenians

in here or something like that well said that to us and then she's like you guys really should even be here there's like better strip clubs down the street but they realize? Yes oh my God yes the money isn't even worth it at that so we're sitting there and then and each one that comes over like it immediately start

like she they're not really sweet talking us they're immediately just start shit talking all the other girls like the one white girl she's like you see that bitch over there she's so old she's like old bitch wherever other strippers employees all their strippers

like and most of them are just sitting around either smoking or listening to music they're not nobody's on dancing on the fucking pole that's hilarious nothing's even happening we're sitting there like assholes you know what's funny about this this is like their own like Armenian strip club drag racing version they like call out the other ones

Nobody goes to them. So we're sitting there. They don't give a fuck. And they're like, yeah, yeah, bitch, you know, I'm gonna fight her in the bathroom later. I'm just like, is it? What? Yes. Is it a fighter? Yeah, yeah. They're acting super violent and I'm just like, I'm like, I don't know, I'm like, you're making me nervous. She's like, oh, I'm nice to, I'm nice to men though. So I'm like, all right, all right. I'm just horrible to half of people on the earth. I just murder every woman. You know, they, they, you know, they're doing their little small talk thing that they're in their, they're in their, they're, they're, they're, they're. in disingenuous small talk and going over like the rules and the lap dances and the VIP room and the well first of all she's yeah she leans in she's like listen some of these girls fuck for money she's like I don't do that I have some self-respect but but if you slip me a thousand dollars you know we'll see what happens

what god are you serious yeah yeah I'm like all right I'm like all right this is more hardcore than I was I'm not I was a little over my head here and then so it just keeps going then then she's like listen like you know there's no alcohol here, but if you really want some, I can hook you up. And I'm like, well, I don't know. At this point, I was a little shaken. I'm like, I don't know. She's like, just go in the bathroom. There's a guy in the bathroom. He's selling, like, the little shots for $10 a piece. Just go. Just go. Just have the...

What the fuck is going on? I don't know. Yeah, she's telling me, like, the guy, there's a guy in the bathroom that sells alcohol illegally. There's like a scene from the crow or something. It feels like a video game where an MPC would hang out. Yeah. Then she hands me her cup of, like, Cabernet wine or something

She's like, you can have that. I'm just like, I don't want this. And then they do you up so you drop that grand. And then she starts pushing coke on me. I feel so lame for, I'm just like, I don't want coke. Are you sure? Are you sure, baby? It's fun. It's fun. Why don't you want Coke? It's good. I'm freaking. I'm just... Is this all real?

Yes. Is that a strip club? Yes. Where was other guy in all this? One girl was talking to him, then when the girl was talking to me. I'm going to throw a reset under the bus here. But this girl was spending like 20 plus minutes talking to him about his whole backstory in his life. And then she's like you want to do like a dance? Like how would you go to dance?

And he's just like no no no no no I don't want to spend any money and she just she got so like frown turned back, walked away sat down at the table on the other side of the stripper pole put headphones on. Why didn't he go to a strip ball if he didn't want to dance? He said

he was going to get a lap dance. Why did he fucking go if he wasn't going to do it? I don't know he needed a new but then he ended up getting one because he said some girl pressured him into it. That's what their job is. That is literally their only job. In their little defense, you guys went into a strip joint. That's what they do there.

It's like taking your car through mechanics and go, no, I don't want anything. Yeah. And this is mean, I'm going to. I just want to chat a little bit. Can you fuck out, dude? Could you imagine? Yeah, try doing that at any restaurant. Just sitting down and then being like, all right, would you like, I don't want anything to sit here.

I don't want anything to sit here. I don't want to sit like a bastard. Well, I just sound like a bastard real fast. I'm going to join Chris from earlier in the podcast, disparaging overweight people. but everyone, everyone, I've never seen so many more, like, really fat strippers in my life. Really? Yeah. Some guys were in the way.

Wait, you looked up best strip club and you got this? Nothing, there was nothing over like three stars. Everything was like three stars. First of all, who is the one putting their public Google name on strip club reviews in the first place? That's already fucking. There's already questions. Can I say that too? All, like, all, all, all, all, all, all, all, Shep's strip club reviews are all like this,

place is amazing and it's like don't fucking come here ever. It's a word, you know it's all like... I want to know who the super reviewers are for strip clubs. No help. The fat Armenians who come in regularly. Yeah. So apparently the girls, like, she's like, yeah, she's like, it's just a bunch of rich Armenians come in and spend a lot of money. They just want their

dick to suck or something and... She's like, yeah, you guys don't... Yeah, yeah. She's like, you guys don't even belong here. Yeah. It's for you. You know, that is one thing to note is that as much as, especially if you go to a strip club, that the Armenian mafia is like a big thing. This is what I keep hearing.

So they own a lot of property. They own a lot of business. And they are not to be fucked with. It's funny because, yeah, because, okay, so when all this was over with and we were disgusted and we left within like half an hour or something. And we got an Uber. This guy on a white Lexus and we get in. And I'm assuming it's an Armenian. Yeah.

And we, you know, somehow we get the topic of the whole trap, the crazy Armenians and the traffic thing come up. And I just very indignantly, I'm just like, or. insensitively, I'm just like, yeah, yeah, wasn't that like that whole Armenian genocide thing? Just like, yeah, just like that whole thing of the genocide. And he's like, oh, my friend, you know, he's kind of talks like Swain, he's like,

ah, my friend, do you know about that? Do you like to learn, would you like a history lesson? You'd like a history lesson, my friends. And I want to imagine Swain doing that. And Reese is so nice, he's like, oh, of course, I love learning. Yeah, let's learn together. So he goes to the entire fucking history of the Armenian

genocide. And once like, kind of picked up he was Armenian and knew every fucking thing about this thing. I quickly about-faced and became more respectful of the whole thing. And he was like, yeah, yeah. He was like, do you know what the word Caucasian? And I'm like, oh, yeah. He's like, do you know where it came from? And apparently it's the Caucasian mountains or something.

Yeah. Yeah. Take a media of Azerbaijan. I'm not kidding. Dude, we got the whole thing. The car stopped in front of our house. He just kept going. Yeah.

We couldn't even open the doors. Like, he just. No, he had it locked. He had an auto lock from his side. He's like, by the way, we're going drag racing. Yeah. He was on. He was a lot.

He was seatbelt on. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Just forget this. What do you want to talk about? Last night before Jeff went on his adventure to, uh, that three star strip job. Yeah.

Yeah. Got offered coke and a blow job and maybe a little more. I don't get shit. Anyways, continue. Uh, it's funnily enough, uh, we're watching videos of whales exploding. Uh, that just seems like the perfect migration, though. You know, you watch. You're watching whales explode one minute.

Next thing you know you're in a strip club. Don't say it. Is that really where that changed? Like you left after that? Jeff just got so horny looking at it. It was just the same night. You got so horny watching that. I want a whale to explode all over my car.

Yeah. Better go to a fat-ass strip club. Fishy guts all over my way. Explode on me, baby. Those are scared because you can literally pull up. No, I'm just saying people die by that, right? People have died by trying to like save beached whales or get rid of. My entire family at home did.

That's really sad. Hibbing a 17 little brothers all died. what O'Neill means in old school Irish what do they call it covered in whale guts covered in well cuts yeah was your family crusts like I'm exploded but could you imagine the obituary on that like so-and-so Jeff Williamson

O'Neill the third dies because he fucking got exploded with whale guts what Irish name is Jeff Williamson O'Neill the third I was trying not to be racist it's like the wind pressure Sean O'Connor O'Connor O'Reilly Connor McGregor O'Neary

it's like a it's like a pressure washer when you you're watching a car, that, like, buildup and that impact of initially doing it, yeah, you can tear your skin off. And, like, I was, like, next to my foot as a kid, thinking what would happen if I put on my foot. Ow.

I didn't know, because the rocks were fucking shooting out. Like, I was, like, 10 feet in the air. You just, like, I wonder what happened if I sprayed my foot. And my dad, like, red there. My dad, like, read there. And he's like, you want to know what happens if you sprayed yourself?

And he went over to a tree with full bark. He went, shot off all the, no, he shot off, like, half the bark. and left like a white spot. He was a giant psychiatry. He said, like, he said this thing could literally burn a hole through your skin if you had it put there for a few seconds. I was terrified

after that, because I was just fucking around in the rocks. Yeah, they used to, like, wash decks off. Yeah, when he knocked raw bark off a tree, I'm like, how you scared a child and not doing something stupid? Yeah, my dad had a way of fucking... That's why you're still with us, Corey. Your dad scared you at every point. There was this one time when I was building a house, and he was using

my own... I miss this. I missed this. I was, I was, I was going to have my dad build a house because, I was about to

you know, like the middle of woods as a 14 year old kid, I had mastered the arts of doing literally everything because that's what my dad made me do.

Got it. And he had hot tar. Uh-huh. Wait, wait. Hold on. He had tar. He had tar because he was like, we were building

like the lower foundation of like a house in the middle of like the woods because he wanted to, he just bought like five acres and he wanted to build a house. So he was building the, the basement foundation.

and he needed like tar to hold certain things in place. So we had hot tar. And we got tar on ourselves. We had it on our skin. How did you get tar yourself? Because we were doing stuff. We were like doing stuff. And like, you know, you can just accidentally get tar.

Just from painting. You get paint on yourself. Yeah, yeah. So we got tar on herself. Then you rolled around some feathers. And my, no, no. And my dad came out. And he's like, oh, well, that's never coming off.

You have to get your skin removed now. And me and my sister were freaking out. And then you just started laughing. He's like, oh, I'm just joking. He's like, that'll come off with certain adhesives. It's going to hurt, but it comes off. He does that shit all the time. He does trial by fire.

It's like, oh, if you're doing something wrong. Trial by TAR. Your dad set you up. He was like, I want them to cover themselves in Taurus so I can terrorize them. So we're playing with Tarr and burning inside. It's like, oh, like, it's got to remove your skin now, like silence of the lambs. And but, like, this. Hey, son, go jumping that pile of mud.

I forget what the tangent was to get into this, but... You said somebody fart a tar bubble or something. No, no, I think I was like to say. What did I say it before this? So you're building a stupid house in the woods. No, we're using water. I was talking about water pressure. Oh, yeah.

So the water pressure is like the fucking, the stomach when it explodes, it's like the same thing. That amount of pressure and air would blow your fucking face, your skin of your face off. Yeah. Because when you're that close, it's like, that's why they have to fucking do this. Like, yeah. I don't know if they're lighting a fire cracker from a flat. I don't think there'd be a shock. I don't think there'd be a shock wave of air pressure coming from a bloated course.

I think it's where the pressure of the water like, I don't know, those intestines that shot across, In that one video literally like smashed against a wall like 20 feet away. Maybe. Rupshire your face and your body if you weren't wearing like a fucking... But it made me think what is the worst, what do you think some of the worst ways people fucking died were? Like I just feel like it's just there's so many ridiculous things that could happen that that would be the end of you. There was...

Yeah, you could smash really easily, man. There's a similar idea. There's a similar idea, but I said there was a video of a people were stuck in traffic and there's a tanker explosion. Yeah. And the explosion didn't get anywhere near the people and like waiting outside their cars. But there was like some kind of heat wave that traveled out from the explosion and hit everybody and what they didn't realize that he had Immediately destroyed like their layer their skin Yeah, it was killed instantly, but they didn't realize it so it like like it felt like a like a like a like a

Sunburn like melted to their skin no no it's like it's like it's almost like it just penetrated their skin It killed their skin cells just like a light rain So they just like ghouls from fuck after like a few hours. It's like they just had a like a sunburn Yeah, but then their skin's like it's like started slopphing off like it was dead dude one of the most fucked up a weird surreal video he's ever seen I really the two guys in the vape shop no no no no no I want to hear that now right all right that sounds like I pretty much weeded off for the dead videos and make them tell me you heard after a while yeah I want every like every

like four months I'm watching too like okay I get it but one of them one of them was we had California a bunch of fires like six months ago I think so like yeah no I know this video and there's a guy who's just like he's a little camp corner the fires the past, he's like, I tried to warn these people, and he takes his little camcorder out, and he points in a big black mask on the running goes, that used to be a dog. It's like a big black lump, and then,

Coral, it gets fucking crazy. And then he walks him to work, burned out calling, he goes, I tried to warn these people, and he looks in the car and I'm not fucking kidding, it is a skeleton in a car seat with its mouth open. A black skeleton. Like a fucking movie prop. It's a black skeleton, and still as a shirt, his mouth is, it's just

a skull. It's a skull on the body. And he goes, and he casually walks to me, he goes, I tried to warn him, but his wife was doing makeup or somebody. Yeah. No, he says it really fucked up. He's like, I told her to stop, but she said she needed to get her makeup done. Now she's

paid the prize. Yeah, now she's paid the prize. He walks up to the other thing, and he's like, looking at these, he looks anyways. He's in shock. Yeah, yeah, he's in shock. That's an in shock moment. Absolutely. But he's so cold, but he's just like, I try. That's his neighborhood. Can you imagine walking through your neighborhood and having it look like that? See your neighbor as a little. It looks like

an artwork, like a scary art book. I was going to say, like, on 9, 11, my friend Ben was telling me that his roommate, when he got back to his apartment, because they were just, like, two buildings over, and he went into his apartment, and his friend was on, like, they don't have a balcony, but he was outside the window. The window was

wide open, and he was, like, hanging over. He wasn't going to jump out, but he was just, like, hanging over, watching it, or whatever. I thought you could say he's a skeleton, he was a skeleton. No, no, no. He came back in. He's a skeleton. He came back in, and he's, like, covered in dust, and he walked right up to

Ben, and he just starts wiping off, like, his shoulders and his arms, and he goes, hey, Dead people. Oh my God. But no, but that's what I mean. Like, super calm. That's shock. Like, total shock.

Like, you just don't even fucking... But I was gonna say, the thing about the skeleton, that reminds me of, like, Terminator. Yeah. When you see, it's kind of cartoonish. It's really like... It's really like...

It was a skeleton. It was that fucking... It looks less believable than Terminator. It looks like a bad movie prop. Yeah. Like a shitty movie pop. You'd be like, oh, it's a B-movie. It's like when you see, like,

food prepared for... It looks like... Its mouth was open, too. When you see food prepared for movies, they have to like do all these tricks to make it look like nice food on camera. Yeah, but it's not, but it's like the same thing. Like a real skeleton doesn't look very impressive. It looks like a shitty fake plastic fucking toy skeleton.

Yeah. What's the vape store? It might not have been a vape store. I saw a video where these two guys were just standing at a counter and what looked like a vape store. But he's like, he's holding a lighter up to his mouth doing the tz-tuck. But then within one second, fire just covers both of their bodies and explodes. What? And they all just like crumple inward and then the camera just cuts out.

What the fuck? So it looks real. Yeah, it was, they're dead. Like, it was real. There was an invisible, there was an invisible non-smelly gas in the air. Oh. Chris, that topic made me think of another thing.

That me and, like, me and Dave found the funniest thing. It's not funny in the context. America's funniest home videos. You guys explode and vapes. No, no. It's not funny in that context. It's funny in the sense of, like,

how fucking stupid people can be. But it's like, some of the funniest videos you can watch is babies falling over and the reaction of them, fucking immediately screaming bloody murder when they fall in like slightly over. I just like how confused they are at first and then they go like fucking crazy about it. It cuts away.

Nothing can beat that. That's the funniest fucking thing ever. And also, so next to that is people who fucking light their shirts on fire and freak out after. What are you doing, dummy? They're like, they're sitting there with their friends and they're just like, they just light their shirt on fire. Then they're like, they're fucking screaming and freaking out. They don't realize they just lit themselves on fire.

They're those whole comprehensive. of those people at parties who like light their shots on fire. Yes. And then they fucking like try to shake them. And then like they're like breathing flames and like slipping on the ground. They knock bottles over and the whole kitchen's like on fucking fire. You're all totally drinking fire. You fucking deserve that fire.

And it's like pouring on the side of them and catching their fires on. Do you see when they're like screaming though? They're like screaming for help. But every time they scream, it's just a big blast of fire shoots out of their mouth. Those people, those people deserve to be the fucking turned up black tart skeletons. I mean, who do?

Well, that's fucked up. Because if you're going to sit there and consciously think, you know what, if I poured lighter fluid on myself in a bathtub and then light myself on fire and then start slipping and get fucking concussion and then die afterwards, I think that's my own fault. Because that's what they were doing. They were just sitting there lighting themselves on fire

and doing this, and then they were like, oh, they were throwing water on it, which just increased the fire outcome. My greatest fear is other people's stupidity because, like, they could just light you on fire. And it's like, thanks. Well, I mean, that happens when you're driving every day. Yeah.

I mean, like, you see people doing the stupidest shit on the fucking road. You could be so careful your whole life. Your whole life. A complete moron just ruins your life and kills your family. Yeah, exactly. A drunk driver. Just like totally fucking taking everyone out. That, like, um, I almost died by a drunk driver because my mom managed to save us.

It's like a fucking scene from a movie. My mom managed to save us the last second. And then this fucking car, careed with the... Carreined? Is that the word? Yes. This car care careened with the other car fucking smashed it so there's like a three-foot car. What was that? This is when I was like really small but I was still able to consciously see things

I can still visually It's like a trial like you can it's something you never forget because it's like so it's so fucking insane You're making it seem like you're a sentient creature Well my mom was pulling me away and I was looking at it and the fucking car smashed like a fucking What do you call those things that you play like dude Oh an accordion Yeah smashed like a fucking accordion and then the car like span off to the side and flipped over It was fucking insane.

You don't see that fucked up video where the guy gets the piano dropped in his head and he has a piano team? It's a fucking hard-up. I was gonna say, I thought he was talking about that movie with Bruce Willis where you can't break him. Unbrucible. And the fucking dude who hit my mom's car died, obviously, because he fucking... You saw a guy die when you were in a fucking voicemont? I mean, I didn't know he died. I found out later that my mom died.

He thought he was just an accordion man. You know in the passion of the Christ. I know what it was. Car smashed in front of me and I'm just like, whoa. And I never forgot that image. You know movies like Pac- Passion of the Christ, like... I can't watch that shit.

It'll just show like a bunch of people covered in blood, like a vision or something. Yeah. I saw something like that as a young child too, where we were driving down the main road, like a minute from my house in Ireland. I looked out the window as like a five-year-old, and I just see like another five-year-old kid that looked just like me with his family, covered in blood because they just smashed into something on the side of the road. Wait, you saw an alternate dimension version of yourself?

The kid looked like, it was a kid my age. He looked kind of like me, he had blonde hair. That is nightmare fuel. No, yeah, that was scary. But they all lives. They all lived. Oh, they did? Yeah.

But they were all covered in blood. Like, I don't know what the fuck happened. I don't know. This sounds like the trailer for the sequel to get out. What was that movie? Get in. Get in. Come back.

Come back, please. It wasn't that bad. Don't go away. But yeah. I don't know. I just hope nobody like broke their back trying to suck their own dick and their parents walked in on them, you know, like they died. That's probably happened at least once.

It once. Every single dumb idea you could possibly think of is probably. Yeah, it's called the Darwin Awards, right? They give you the Darwin Award if you fucking die the double-sword. That's really mean, like, not only do you die and your family has to deal with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So fucking mean, yeah. There used to be the show on Netflix, and I remember watching it, obvious, because it was like the title was fucking insane.

It was like 1001 ways. I remember that. That's stupid people have sucked. Fuck that. I don't think that's bad. In fact, I think we should get fucking video footage of that type of shit. You know why? To fucking remind people how fragile and how stupid we can be to fucking show

the stupid deaths, show people fucking doing dumb shit. Just to remind you not to do that shit. Man, there's this one website I used to go on just because I was, like, you know, morbidly curious. I got desensitized of everything. I hate this kind of shit. Like, I never look at this stuff. And then whenever I see

it, it stays in my head for the rest of my life. Like, I've never forgotten 90% of the shit that I've seen. That's fucking just traumatically horrible nonsense. Absolutely. It's like animal abuse is like the one thing. I can't watch that. I refuse. Yeah, I can't.

I actually, like, I removed so, and I blocked so. I don't know if I said this on a podcast already, but, like, one video I remember vividly was this little, like, polyammer, like, poodle white. It was, like, one of those white dogs with really, like, heavy fur and stuff. I don't know if it was in Russia or some fucking place, but there was lots of snow around, and there was these, like, shitty kids in, like, this shitty area

where it looked like nobody fucking lived, where they had a dog, and, like, the dog was scared shitless of them, and they had, like, tied a rope around its neck. And they lit the dog on fire, and let it go with the rope. What? They chased after it. The camera went,

they were like laughing and giggling, and the camera was shaking around and stuff. And the most fucked-up part is, there's snow everywhere. Yeah. It could just fucking... Just roll around, yeah. It could trip over a rock and accidentally fall.

But it doesn't know, so it just keeps running. It just runs around and... Right, right, right, right. And then it, like, it fucking careens into a door and breaks its neck. And the dog runs into it. It's still, like, twitchy, but it's still dying. It sounds like a toy that's, like, slowly dying.

And at that point, I stopped watching it. And because the person told me, they sent me these, video before I started I'm like this sounds this looks fucked up I'm like there better be a happy what did they say I said there better be a happy angel so this what was their preference like hey check out this funny video lol cry emoji no he's in the video he's like this is sad and I'm like there better be a happy ending at the end of this video or I'm we're done talking this is the end of a conversation like

permanently like never send me anything ever yeah and after the video was done I'm like what happened at the end he's like the end was he died and I'm like alright see later and I removed him and I never added him again after that that was like a sure fire away to get your fucking ass gone. I don't get why people do that. It's horrible. There's always people on, well, when I used to be on Facebook, there would be like normal

girls I used to know living in Ireland that are my age and they'll just post like animals getting beat up and they're like, isn't this terrible? It's like, why the fuck would I want to see this? You fucking dope. Get killed. I've seen stuff on Twitter with like Japanese people like taking their dog and slamming it against the fucking wall and I'm like, this is horrible. They always do it to like shock you.

It's like, I know it's bad. That's why I don't want to watch you. Sometimes it's a mixed bag. They do it either to like bring aware to animal abuse, which is fucked up to say like use a video that existed already to like bring awareness to animal abuse. Or they try to make the video popular so more people see it. And then those people get taken down. See, sometimes I think those two motives get mixed because I don't follow artists. I understand.

I'm just saying the more popular. The more popular it is, the more I see it. And therefore hopefully more people will be aware of the problem. Yeah. But I, but you know. when their motives are to fucking just get... Yeah, so when I follow artists who do that kind of stuff, great.

Make a new account, post all the shit you want and fucking warn people. I just, you know, I think it's really fucked up to be like posted to the timeline where, you know, like, all of your friends are now going to see it with that, like, you're doing that just for your own benefits. Yeah. Because you want attention. I've seen...

That's popped up a few times. Like, animals getting their heads are kicking. Can I say it really fucking... It really fucking makes me really, really angry. really fucking irrationally mad when people when like there's a shooting that happens there's a horrible thing and everybody Thoughts and prayers or the icons

No no no not even thoughts and prayers Everybody's offering thoughts and prayers I don't care But it's on Twitter when it's like Media influencers or like creators or YouTubers Have to say something And they don't say anything new or interesting They only say like

So horrible to see what's going on Yes Hope things go well It's like dude you Even if you are sad You are not tweeting that If I could remove 100% of your followers You would not have tweeted that

No You're doing it for brownie points. You're making a fucking horrible event about yourself. If you're adding nothing, if you're, look, if you're saying, hey, donate blood here, donate money here, it's different. But when you're literally saying so shocked to see what's happening at that thing. Do you know why you know what your money or your mouth is? No.

And you know there are terrible things happening around the world every fucking day, several times a day. There was the fuck, there's been so many shootings and bombings and everything. over the Easter holiday and shit and how many fucking times has it been brought up very few times it tends to be the trending ones it tends to be the more popular ones and it's yeah or whatever it may be now I'm not saying you shouldn't be

sympathetic obviously and I'm not I'm not saying anybody shouldn't feel bad what I'm saying is when I see media influencers when I see content creators fucking say something to the effect of almost verbatim like so shocking to see what's going on in blank my heart goes out to you what the fuck did you add

nobody from that thing is seeing your tweet dude You're doing it to make it about yourself. And I know some people are going to fight me on that and say that's me being ridiculous. But if you knew some of these fucking sociopaths, they're doing it for themselves. They want to make it about themselves. They want to let you know how sad they are. It's not. Because what happens after is they're like so sorry for this.

And then they're talking about their new Gucci's. Yeah. Oh, by the way. Yeah. But we're so sad to see 95 people were beheaded. Anyways, we're going to stream in 20 minutes. Dude, I tweet a link to a donation thing. Yeah.

A blood bank. Fine. I don't care. But you're just tweeting so sad. What I typically do, if, like there's a really shitty thing that went on is I will try not to tweet that day you know I'll leave it

24 hours because I know like if I said anything funny or and sometimes it's really fucked up like sometimes you like some event happens and then like someone isn't aware of what's going on and they're just tweeting silly stuff and people like fucking open up your eyes a million people just died you fucking asshole you just like I was I was taking a shit I didn't even realize

this yeah and that happens a lot I see that all the time on my Twitter feed and it's like sometimes you can't like you can't shoot the messenger look I'm still adamant that it's good to read the news I think you probably know what's going on but like I yeah read the news I fucking hate the news read the news but because who wants to get your news from Twitter or something

you know what I mean so if you read the news anymore you know who gets the news from Twitter they read articles the fucking news gets the news from Twitter it's true do you know how many fucking news articles quote Twitter as a source yeah or how many times it is actually scary they use highlights and the only thing people read now in like news articles is the top of

The headlines, yeah. But all I meant to say was, like, read the news, fine. I still think it's a good thing. It's depressing, but read the news, but when you tweet about the news, or I know this first time, whenever you tweet about something, you never feel better, you never feel like you scratch the edge. It always, it makes you feel worse. I stopped tweeting about the news, but I still.

Me too, because the people that are agree with you are going to keep agree with you, you're never going to change someone's mind. No, you know what's even more frustrating? It's fucking pointless, in my opinion. It may be, or whatever information you may give, everyone's going to miss, not everyone. many people are going to misinterpreting. There are people who want to be antagonized

or want to be fucking angry. For every one tweet you put out, you have to make three tweets to qualify, explain it. That's not what you meant. Obviously, it's more than that. This is a request to all animators, all artists, the world is a device in place.

Make stuff that everybody can enjoy. You'll feel better. Trust me. Don't fucking inject politics. If you want to do that, do it. But I've really come to the conclusion. TV right now, no matter what sure you're watching, left or right, everything is fucking politicized, and it's gonna age, I'm calling it right now, it is, it is gonna age, so fucking

badly. It already has. Every movie every movie, TV show, most movies and TV shows that are coming out right now in the last two or three years are gonna age. Ten years are gonna go, oh, it came out in 2017. There's a bunch of Trump shit in it, oh boy. It's gonna age fucking badly. Imagine if, imagine if, like, a bunch of 70s movies had a bunch of anti-Nixon shit in them.

It'd be annoying. I'm just curious. What are like some right-winged shows? What do you mean? Oh, one of the shows with, like, right leading, Stitz? I don't really know any. I'd say it's more like actors

and people like... Two things about Twitter. You know what you were talking about tweeting out, not tweeting out, shit when the big tragedy happened? Yeah. I'm pretty sure when that New Zealand mosque shooting happened,

I tweeted out something really stupid about farts or something. And I didn't know what happened and everyone was just like, what the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah, nobody knows. I was like, oh shit. And then I figured it out.

You have to either delete it and be like, sorry, you know what the tragedy happened? They're like, wow. You're apologizing? for not knowing what is happening. Sorry about my fart tweet. I didn't know people New Zealand got killed. That's another thing too.

You ever notice that Twitter promoting their own moments only ever get less than 100 likes? And they're embarrassing and forgotten in the moment? Like the biggest website in the world and their main moments that they promote usually only get 100 100. Nobody on Earth has ever said oh let's check on Twitter moments

that blows my fucking mind that everyone has it and no one fucking cares. Here's what Kylie Jenner is the richest fucking maker artist. Yeah, well, she wore this crazy swimsuit. Wow. When something terrible happens, I think there's an expectation from some people that you should say something, that you should have an opinion, that you should speak up or add your voice to the pool of support or whatever. But look, look, I get it.

I get if the argument is like, oh, you have like 5 million Twitter followers. You should help somehow. If you really want to fucking do that, I am fine with that. That's fine. But what I'm shitting on is the just making it about you. Like I'm sad, well, so what, dude? People are dead. So what did a let's play a little fucking same.

No, no, no. All I'm trying to say is, top 10 guys. I agree. I agree. And what I would say is this, is that can we all just assume to some degree, and maybe it's a bad assumption. Maybe I'm just way out on a limb. But can we all assume that if there are terrible tragedies happening, that I'm not at home

fucking giggling about it. But maybe I don't need to put out a tweet talking about that. That particular thing because I don't think my tweet, we all are reading the news. We all know what the fuck is going on. We know the plot. It's bad. This shouldn't happen.

I said years, years ago on this funny podcast, I said if somebody dies and your family, if there's a horrible thing, and call back. Rewind. If your first instinct, when a horrible tragedy happens,

is to pick your phone and either take a picture or to fucking tweet, you are a fucking narcissist. Get therapy, please. I saw, on front of a, Rico sent me some fucking Twitter a tweet a guy did where it's like

I swear to God the tweet was like I'm not gonna let me someone can find it but like don't fuck with the guy but like somebody tweeted like my little brother died I'm gonna miss him and it's two selfies of him like crying over his dead brother on a hospital bed and it's like dude I get people grieved differently but what

the fuck? We were watching YouTube videos and we saw thumbnails and you want to talk about how bad clickbait has gotten this girl this girl was holding two babies, she's like, one of my babies says autism. And it's just like, and she has like her, I guess.

It was like autism reaction or something. It was weird. And then you watch, mother reacts to autism. Yeah, it's so fucking horrible. This is where we've gotten. This is where we've gotten. I'm sorry.

Autism reveal. This fucking like, like this is why, and I'm just going to say this, this is why we need Sleepy Cap to fucking rant. And this is why it's weird and not do an episode for 100 years that come back and we're all just vehement.

I was making note of this. By the way, five years almost we'd be doing this. That means we were all in our early 20s. Most of us were early 20s. Five years. Except me, I was 50. You were 65 right now. You look younger than you were when you started.

Mick was about 400 pounds. He had thick glasses. All the little baby placentas of anything. Mixed classic mustache got shaved off in season two. Since we started, I think we've all become more aware of all the bullshit. And I myself, like, when people are like, like, we have to watch out for a But at the same time, I realized that, like, if people wanted to use my background against me, only thing I could do is own up to it.

If people want to say anything, I'm going to be like, yeah, I did that. I'm not going to be like, you know, we grow up. It's like, you know, we, we age. Yeah, no, I don't feel bad about it. Everybody has fucking grown up. No, I get, I would feel bad if we were, like, malicious assholes, try to be hurtful, try to be, like, racist or something. Yeah.

I think they know, everyone knows. Everyone knows. Everyone grows up. Everyone involves. It's all about intent, right? But no one actually thinks like that. Everyone says you said something that offends me, therefore you are a horrible person. You're now dehumanized.

You're scum on the animation. You can't be human. No, my intent was to make people laugh. That's what it is. It's not nobody is at, when these big things happen, like when the James Gunn thing happened, right? Yeah. Nobody was actually offended for the most part. I bet some few were.

But mostly it was people saying, oh, he should get in trouble. Right. Like we expect him to. It's never been about, oh, this actually had my feelings. Nobody actually went, oh, I feel bad. It's, you're not supposed. Most to say it, now you're supposed to get in trouble. Your job is forfeit after.

If people are actually getting their feelings hurt, it'd be like, okay, you know, I actually apologize. But it's always, I don't like that guy or girl, I'm going to go after them. That's all it is. But I will say, the jokes he was making were really cringy, baby fucking jokes. They were fucking weird. And he is a huge social justice loser. Roseanne, he was glad Roseanne got fired for words. Yeah, but they shouldn't be fired for words.

And they were a decade old. Yeah, that was when he was making the movie Super. I just think that if you've seen Super, there's literally a scene where, what's her name? Oh, Ellen Page? Yeah, Ellen Page rapes Dwight from the office. It's a literal fucking scene. Spoilers! That's all the Wikipedia.

Ellen Page, Wripes Dwight from the office. Rates fucking Dwight. I'm serious. Just all these people, they're just out for blood. Oh, fuck was that. We were talking about earlier, wait, what, wait, did I just lose my thought? Uh-oh. We're saying slighting.

Chris, you need some geeko beloba. Sled gang? I would say, sled gang, I think sled gang should get their fucking, the dude who is doing it. What's really funny? I don't even know what this is. What the fuck are you? Oh, we're watching this thing called sled gang where this kid.

Oh my God. Slides down, things on a sled and smash the shit and he runs away. Hell does he. Like, he looks like 15, but I think he's 21. Yeah, he's just like a little shithead. But he does that McDonald's like drop your ice cream cone. Oh, oh, oh, he's like a little pug little set of little set of a little set of a little set of a little set of a little set of milk jug smashing crap. You want to hear the, fuck those kids.

You want to hear the ultimate irony of everything that what. They must be destroyed. He uploaded a video and he actually, it was like kind of like a raw edit and his friend was like, don't do this. Your mom was gonna fucking lose her mind. You're an idiot. Don't do this. And he's like, get out of my way. I'm 20.

I'm 21. He's like, dude, you're a fucking idiot. And the guy like moved him. And then when he did it, he fucking knocked the front of his teeth out. Yeah. Faceplanted on cement.

I love that he. He gets up. He's like, that was a mistake. This is the last few ever making. It was the truth. He reached up, touched his tooth and he took up dropped out of his mouth.

raises his tooth with his fingernail and it pops out of his head. Yeah, it's fucking disgusting. It's hilarious. But you know what? He fucking deserved that because he's a bastard and that's the kind of come up that you deserve. Don't say the B word. Bitch? Bastard.

Oh. Well, he's, yeah, he's a benign asshole. And see, that's the thing. I like when you brought back in Bacobo. I believe in karma to some degree. I believe if you're an asshole, asshole or shit is going to bite you in the ass. Man, it is amazing seeing karma play out in real life. It always happens.

It's amazing. It does. Yeah. Karma is 100%. I mean, I'm not a guru with this fucking colors and shit, but I can say for a fact, personal experience that karma can be a bitch and it is real. So it's like how you come about doing stuff. If you're a douchebag, douchebag stuff will happen to you. If you're nice, nice things will happen to you. So try to be... I don't know if it's where the universe attacking you back. It's more like if you treat it. Let people badly. They start to fucking treat you badly back. And people say it's like bad juju or like, but that's like, that's just you like how you come off. It's like it goes, it just starts building. up and building up until just bad shit happens. Yeah, I'd like to believe, I'd like to believe there's some kind of carmic scoreboard keeping track. There's a carmic scorpion in space. But honestly, I don't, I

don't know, I get the feeling sometimes that some assholes just get away with it and they live long lives. They're not getting away with it, no more, make. It's starting to crumble. It's starting to crumble. I'm going to put my gloves on and change my name and get

ready. I'm coming for you. It's to a fucking hypothetical. Okay. For good old time. For good old sake. Would you rather sit in a nice warm cabin or go fishing on a nice summers day? That's a good hypothetical. I'd rather fuck you in the butt, Chris.

That's not what are the end. Hypothetical. You can't just come up with a hypothetical. You can't just do that. I have the hypothetical. Oh, you do? Let's do what, yeah, Cord, go. So it goes back to the topic of the 1001.

We were talking a lot about death and stuff. I'm not hoping some maniac sets this up. But hypothetically, someone drops me into the fucking series. swimming, you're trying to get out. And then some dude helps you out. He's wearing a mask. You can't see him. And he has a little setup of four different items and things to kill yourself with him. Holy crap. You really

thought about this. What the fuck? Damn. It just felt like a good background. Like it just puts you in a bad mood. Wait, wait. So somebody wait, wait, wait. Well, there's no fucking... Wait, wait. Hold on. So other people, people that are not that guy capture you. You were sleeping like a mummy when you fell into the sewer hole. How the

fuck did I fall into it? It is just like, shit, what am I covered in shit? Yeah. Yeah. E fecal. That's the start. It's like you're already infected with salmonella. You're already going to die.

That's nothing to do a face-to-a-score. You are Tim Robbins in the Shal Shrek adaption. You exit the pipe and this man is sitting there with a chair. He's sitting there with a chair. You're all through. Your life is forfeit because... Five football fail. Your life is forfeit because you now have Salmonella from indulging in shit in your mouth.

So now there's four things laid astute about you. There's four ways you can fucking crook. Uh-huh. The first way, There's a sewer grate. There's a sewer hole. You crawl through it. What happened to the potions? Potions. What are you talking to? There was no potions, you psycho.

The lexures, the four things he gives you. Well, wait, you said there were four items. One of the items is another sewer hole? The sewer hole is... It's a four things. Four legs sacks. Okay. The sewer hole, you'll eventually have to crawl through. Quall through. You have to go and go die.

You have to eat your way out. How does that kill you? Well, you get stuck, and then the rats eat you. That's how you die. face down in a sewer hole, stuck at rats are eating you. Okay, yeah, no. What's next? Next? And give the smell shit. What's the next one? Yeah, move on to the next one. That's pretty bad.

The next one is, there's a vat of fucking cement in front of you. Okay. And you have to crawl into it and then basically sleep in the cement while they put a brick over here. What do you sleep? Do they give you a sleep medication? Yeah, they give you some zine-out. All right, yeah, keep on, you go. Wait, does the cement go over my head? This is one thousand and one ways people have died. Right.

These are the reasons why they're. they had died. It's just one thousand ways Corey kills you. No, no. Corey, you're the bashed. You're the fucking creeping the mass. These are actual ways people die. Okay. Like, the first way was... That's not real! You're not telling me someone got stuck face down

and rats ate him. No, that is real. No, it's not. It is real. I'm sure it happened at one point. He did not get eaten alive by rats. He died and then he got... No, no, he did Chris. I swear to God, he was a convict. And he... This show was made by fucking idiots. No, they gather information of people who

have died. They make this shit up, Corey. Chris, this was not made up. You have to admit that at some point somebody got stuck in a sewer and rats killed. They take situations of people and they like blow it up. Obviously it's not the same people. So what's the second scenario? Cement? What's the third scenario?

What happened in the scenario was the guy fell into the cement and he died by being drunk and he fell into the cement. You said he went to sleep in it. Yeah, he like fell into the cement. He had a fucking candle, a night hat and a fucking blanket over his shoulder. He had a fucking. He said to his thumb. He was a little.

Oh, oh. Then what? Third guy? Okay, the third guy was playing golf. All right? Wait, I'm in a sewer playing golf? No, you're twice. The third guy was playing golf, and he was going to swing, and the other guy accidentally fell down. This is a weird setup for this one.

And the weird guy fell down, and the guy fucking swung his thing. He told me the guy's head. He told me the guy's head fell like his open mouth fell in a golf golf? And then he had he... How would you accidentally... accidentally hit someone's head, the time it would take. I don't know, but these are like reaccounted things. But do you know what I'm saying?

Like, if the ball has a tea on it, Corey, his mouth would have to go over the ball. He fell onto the ball and the guy, like, was swinging. The guy was coming in with the things and he tripped and fell. All these people died by accident or either by... All these scenarios so far, I'm not saying you're lying, I'm saying all so far sound like what a mafia guy

would say on the stand to a jury. I don't know. He just... I was swinging the golf club and he just fell down on the ball. He just fell down in the cement. He was taking a nap. What's the fourth sewer death? The fourth one, like, was basically, it was something Mick said, where this person was in a pool and it was, like, warmed up. Or maybe it was, like, a sauna, and he was just resting in it.

And eventually, it became, because the more hot something is, the more relaxing it becomes. And he took, like, the things that make you relax and get, like, tired. Santa X? Yeah. And he basically cooked alive. So, he knew. Was it, like, boil? People have definitely died in hot tub.

Yeah. You say it cooked his tummy up into juice. It's tummy tum. He basically cooked his tummy to a big steak. Yeah, and I'm saying, like, you have to choose one of these. Oh, the golf one, because you just die in two seconds. Do you, though? Or do you just get, like, crippling brain damage for a little bit?

It sounds like the guy... It was a trick question, Zach. You already got salmonella at the beginning. You're going to die anyway. Just like that. How did I get someone out of the sewer? What can I eat? I try doing, like, hypotheticals with someone, and he always changed the fucking rules.

So it's way better when people aren't being consistent. Okay. Like, I'd be like, you're in a room. This guy, the weirdo rapist is going to rape you. And I'm like, okay, well, I leave. And he's like, there's no door. You're saying you were with the- Hold on, hold on.

You always do that. Are you saying you were with the guy that changed the rules? That was Zach every time. Yeah. Zach would be like, oh, yeah, you're in a room. There's a man trying to rape you. Oh, what do you do?

I run away. You can't run away. Your legs are tied together. Then I try to fight them off with my hands. You can't. You have no hands. Yeah. And his dick is already in your butt.

What do? Look for the window. Okay, let's play the game where we all... Let's play the game where we all say a word. Yeah, come on, Jeff. Come on, Jeff, come on, Jeff, you want to... The boy. Boy.

No, start again. The boy. Ghost. Ghost? Boy, ghost. Oh, the boy ghost. Was slippery. Because he jumped within.

The... Tall. Erect. Tree. The end. Great. A classic cookie fuck. Another.

Another. Okay. And. Retard. That's the end. That's the end. And retort. Another.

Corey starts. What? Yeah. What? Question mark. Okay. That's two. Another. The.

Jeff. Can't think about it. What the fuck? Jeff. The first one. What's a fun of time. Cory, go! Once a little, cheap.

Small. Did you say cheap? Sheep. Sheep. Sheep. I think he's cheap. Okay, once a little sheep. Once a little sheep.

Ran his mouth off. Then. His ass. Prolapsed. That's sad. Heavily. Once a little sheep ran his mouth off and prolapse. Do another, one more.

Mick, start. I like really nice fairy tale. I hate this. You're like, once upon a time. Do one more, Mick. Go. All right. 1,000. 75 million.

Pennies. Stop in the fucking over, Corey. 1,075 million pennies fell dramatically. Into the mouth of. Two words. That's the hyphen mouth. The mouth.

Coy double dick. Fucking pictorial. Yes. We'll start again. One more. Unbeknownst To the devilish woman Slyly.

She unzipped her bluse When hyphen suddenly She saw a pecker Pecking In her Furt. farted

I heard that you said Becker and farted I think that means something That counts Wait that's the most Was that your word? Yeah

If somebody on Twitter saw that That hit you They saw you say Packard and fart They go Oh This man is terrible That's like

That's gonna like That's what they imagine You know That's what they imagine you Yeah Oh God Fuck this Can we end

Okay Mac Give us a good ending We're not gonna say anything Right after After what I've done With this No one's ever going to say you have to end it 100% right after

now. This ends. This is over. You fucking throw down. We say our goodbye. All right, guys. I want to thank everyone for listening to the podcast. It's been a good right. We've got a bunch of Patreon questions

can be in the answer. And we're going to pull them up right now.