Sloss and Humphries On The Road - 5.16: Shirt Gatherers

Episode Date: January 25, 2023

Muggins and Cream are joined by resident vet, OG listener and loving dad to them both, Sid Sudunagunta. They mainly discuss their relationship with food and slurs used by Neanderthals.

Uh, hello podcast listeners and viewers, welcome to another non-patreon episode of the show, you fucking tight cunts, unless you are a patreon person, in which case congratulations on getting this on Monday. If you're cheap, have a good Wednesday, hope it's going well. Uh, on this week's episode, uh, we are not stoned, so that's good for you, innit? Um, we're completely sober, all of us, all three of us, we've got our guest, uh, Sid on the show um um just because he's up to help me babysit my son i gotta stop saying babysitting man i gotta stop saying that fucking car i get so pissed off it's not babysitting i'm parenting i'm being a father

i'm being a father well she's away being a mother somewhere else it's it's i'm not a babysitter i'm a present father um so he jumps on. It's a funny episode. We laugh a lot. We speak about bad parenting. Not just mine. You'll be pleased to know. We speak about my childish attitudes towards most foods. And it was very nice to have Sid back me up on those because this fucking old fucking healthy piece of shit.

Oh, I like fucking grains. Grow up, you fucking sad cunt. Not all of us grew up in a hovel. Some of us have fucking taste buds and have had it for a while. I only like eggs, you fucking freak. Anyway, it was nice to have some backup in the conversation.

We speak about culling, so you can skip that if you want. And then we get very self-conscious about the fact that we're very much becoming a lifestyle podcast because we just talk about getting into shape. So sorry, sorry if you find that a bit boring I get it but I want you to understand you don't need to be in shape to be happy but I do that's just it that's that's it if you're cool in the shape you're in more power to you not me that's not all how old

narcissist sloss works not me so good for you sad sad for me. Enjoy the episode. Sloss and Humphreys on the road. Muggins and cream, cream and muggins. Straight thuggin', livin' the dream. That's our intro. Fuckin' muggles. Ticklin' the clit inside your head that makes you laugh. Woo-hoo! Ha-ha-ha!

They said it can't be done. Are we in the same seats? That's hack. Aw, muggles. Accidental rim job in the park. Kiss, kiss, kiss. Or am I just being cynical? Just muggled it up on fucking Mugglepedia

Where have you been since 9-11? I saw it on Sycopedia And I saw it from an Irish comedian's set So I don't know which I can guess the joke I don't know which one stole it Uh huh But it was the

Alcohol free beers Like licking out your sister Yep It tastes the same You just shouldn't do it Yep Yep But this is alcohol-free cider.

So just apple juice. Yeah. Well, I'm doing kind of Sober Jan, as we've discussed. I've broken it in Amsterdam, obviously, but that was always the intention. That wasn't like, oh, I failed. That was, I acknowledged that it was going to happen. It happened.

It is in lieu. Yeah. Colin has put in a phenomenal shift. Because he's done it way through. Oh, and he's been handed temptation more times. So tonight we've got Sid staying with us. Who is not in dry January.

No. But when in Rome. Just solidarity. Not just solidarity. Because Cara is away, out tonight, for a very, very well fucking urge. She's like, I'm going to go out with my friend and I'm going to get pissed. And whenever Canada decides to do that I'm like, please

for the love of God, you go out and have fun because then I'll feel less guilty when I'm on tour and these things. You do as much as I try she still does. You're trying to compare your month of sobriety with a massive session in the middle of it to her pregnancy. No, no, I just mean

I try to do my fair share even when i do my fair share of parenting cara still does 75 of it that's just so whenever i can do some 100 of it you you absolutely massage those figures as well yeah oh no no i feel like you know i'm present the whole time i'm just not useful there um so i'm like please for the love of God go out I knew you were coming

I knew fucking Cullen was away and I said to Sid I was like I was like look hey if you come up if a joint falls in your fucking bag what's to happen? he was like

no not doing it I'm like fuck alright good one thanks man so you were saying it's alright if we have a spirit I was like hey if it falls

yeah if you blow it in my mouth wind goes in have a script I was like hey if it falls yeah if you blow it in my mouth wind goes in different directions and he was like I'm not I'm not letting you break it man so you know what though

I think if you'd asked one more time it was gonna I would've done it I'd go yeah oh yeah you'd probably go yeah

but I no no but that was man I just need the fucking resistance and also I would like to believe

I would like to believe that if you brought it up I would have just been to you, save it for tomorrow when you're fucking hanging out with whoever like, cause when I asked you it was one day after Amsterdam, so that was when the fucking addict in my head was going wild being like

there's an opportunity, there's an opportunity, you can get it and now that it's been like four days off and I've been at the gym, I'm like, I'm very glad that decision was made on my behalf well I just like also of all the degenerates you know

if I was the one who like helped you fail dry January I'd have felt really guilty yeah you can easily pass yours off

as just as religious like no one would peer pressure at you probably yeah I'm not going to ask any more questions I'm just going to

let ignorance do the rest. What religions don't drink at all? Muslim, which... They don't drink at all? Which is Syrian. They're not meant to. No, they're not supposed to.

I know Muslims. It's just like... Because I know heaps of Jews that love bacon. It's saying... Hella Jews. Hella Jews that eat hella bacon. I don't know if I'm meant to be snitching on these Jews but

I've seen I've seen yeah I've seen Jews eat bacon but he's I mean not real Jews like second generation third generation Jews

Muslims don't eat bacon no Muslims don't do pork Muslims don't drink it makes it makes so much sense why like they're from hot countries

and the food would go off and make you violently ill so it probably pays you not to eat the thing that makes you sick all the time. But now that we've mastered refrigeration and stuff.

Well, it's like Christians aren't meant to eat shellfish for the exact same fucking reason. So it was like, it used to just, I don't know what was in the fucking water. But then I suppose like

Chinese culture, they eat quite a lot of pork. Japan do as well. And then like Southern India, I think they do. I mean, this might also be ignorance, but the Chinese eat everything.

Yeah, man. Hey. Who eats a bat? do as well and then like southern india i think they do i mean this might also be ignorance but the chinese eat everything remember that whole pandemic guys um speaking of eating uh part of my like fucking health kick that i'm doing is you know me i'm all getting off the haribo as well as the booth wow yeah man i'm on i'm really shit, shit, fucking same three meals a day and will be on those same three meals a day for the next five weeks. Just plain old rice. Yep. With a bit of...

You wouldn't have salmon with it, would you? A bit of chicken. Chicken. Dry chicken breast. Yep. Soy sauce, because sodium is very good for stripping. Quite a bit of sugar in that book. Yeah, well...

Not sure. No, it's mainly... No, it's mainly just... I've checked my PT and it's all fine and you know how I'm a picky eater and I hate being a picky eater

despite it it's not a good personality trait I don't like that I have it you're not a personality trait no so every every now and again I will try something

that I think I don't like to try and fucking be like right because here's the thing right man don't like tomatoes like tomato sauce like fucking pizzas

like fucking any tomato soup Like fucking pizzas Like fucking any Tomato soup It's the texture of tomatoes That I'm just not It's like peas Peas are just little Fucking balls of pus Right

It's like Tuna sweet corn Tuna sweet corn's The worst thing in the world Because it's just Somebody put plooks Inside of a delicious Fish mayonnaise sandwich

Is that just Does that just reserve For savoury stuff Or if you got like A chocolate with a bit of caramel in And it bust open And the caramel was in it? No.

Would you be like, it's like a plook? Well, I don't like plooks. No, plooks. Plooks. I mean, I feel like with the context, I know what a plook is, but I've never heard it ever be called a plook. It's Scottish then, plook. I've not made up plook.

Please Google plook. That was Matthew, the producer, saying I've not heard it. And even though you lobbied for a long time The appearance For him to have a mic We give the mic to Sid Aye And if you're asking

Where the fourth mic is It's under this chair We just couldn't be arse-getting it We would have had a stand-up We would have actually Had a stand-up And we'd sat down At this point

Pluk There you go Pluk It does make sense It's not spelled The way I thought it was Oh no it is Aye aye No I think that's not spelled the way I thought it was Oh no it is Oh yeah

No I think that's Did you think it was Going to be like Puke with an L I did Yeah yeah yeah Yeah And they've

A spot or a pimple It's got to be Scottish Look Yeah no I don't really like Caramel in general But that's not For those reasons

Man They're just Little balls of Awful Sadness And sweet corn And yep Whoever put tuna That's not for those reasons. Man, they're just little balls of awful sadness and sweet corn and yip. Whoever put tuna and sweet corn together, if I could go back in time, I wouldn't kill Hitler. I would kill whoever that fucking cunt was.

You're a sweet corn guy. Aye. But somebody would just come across it eventually anyway because it's nice. Aye, but he must have had Hella Marketing behind him who was like, do you know what? Do you know? I'm sorry I've said Hella so many times this podcast.

Like me with frittata liver. Where have you gotten hella from? Who have you been hanging out with? Who have you been hanging out with? Is this from you? Do I sound like I say hella a lot? No, not with that. So, peas and sweet corn, I just, I don't think I'll ever get into them.

Today I was making Cara a wrap and she she has salads in her wrap and I'm like fucking if I man if I was able to get into lettuce what a fucking dream if I could get into salads

how much easier my life would be as three people who you eat salads you eat salads yeah yeah I'm trying not to sound like an infant child here, but it is...

You're a capoe. It is the most degrading thing I have ever done in my life. Are you eating just salad? No, no, to eat... If you put it in a ham sandwich, it gives the sandwich a bit of a... So you've got soft bread, soft ham, soft butter, crunch. No, this is crunch. It's like...

Crisps! Crisps! That's why crisps exist! I knew you were going to say that. That's why crisps have different flavour. And those flavours aren't water. Yeah, that's checkmate. I can't argue with that. Apart from the reason you're eating is totally devalued by... If you're eating a sandwich, fuck you.

If you're eating a fucking ham sandwich, if you're eating a ham sandwich, the lettuce on that is doing nothing. It's just adding texture. And if you're just adding texture, crisps. I think you're getting nutrients off your salad with ham sandwich. If you're eating a ham sandwich, the lettuce on that is doing nothing. It's just adding texture. And if you're just adding texture, crisps. I think you're getting nutrients off your salad with a sandwich.

I think it's wasted with the fucking bread you're putting on and the rest of the butter and the shit. Like, you're not, it's not a healthy decision. Can I meet you halfway

with like fried crispy onions? No. See, you used to hate onions, but I'm definitely coming there. Like, that's flavourful and those are like cooked crunch, like I from the bottom of my heart, I would

I think I would feel less degraded if I ate another man's cum off of Cara's back than I would Why's that hot? Why'd I like that loads? Loads was the wrong You should have said hella, because loads was

the wrong phrase to use in that time it's too many connotations it's the putting that fucking leaf in my mouth a leaf from a tree that not

like people don't eat it it's not from a tree it doesn't matter it's a leaf it's the most degrading it's a lettuce tree yeah well a bush

well a bush doesn't make it better you think lettuce is a fruit don't pretend if it comes from the ground and it comes from a fucking bush that it makes it cooler well Moses spoke to a bush nah

none of that it's still a fucking plant I love that you've just shouted over the fact that you thought lettuce was a fruit well if tomatoes can fall into that category yeah that reminds me of the time

when my ex-girlfriend when she's cooking a chicken do you want the front leg or the back leg and I'm like when have you seen chickens galloping around the fucking coop just can't turn about

with their little front legs is there no is there no are you telling me genuinely from the bottom of your heart there's no shame screaming in the back of your head when you chew lettuce like a fucking rabbit.

There's your ancestors who fought their way to the top of the food chain aren't screaming through history and calling you whatever the Neanderthal word for faggot was. I'm sorry for the word I use you fucking short gatherer you picking daisies as well you fucking I bet that was

I bet that was the old homophobia hunters were absolutely looking down on the gatherers look at him he's planting fucking seeds. Now, you see, tell you what, when he's out planting seeds in the field, I'm going to plant a seed in his wife. Make sure she doesn't birth a fucking gatherer.

Yeah, but you know what's happening though? You're out hunting and your wife feels safer on the gatherer. All of a sudden they're putting suntan lotion on her back. Like, oh, I've never felt like this about a woman before. I bet you haven't. You fucking clown. You fucking used that as an angle you prick

I'll gather I tried to fuck you bird hold on can you just explain to me the suntan lotion is just the aloe vera that he's grown

very funny good bit guys it's not it's generally not degrading eating guys aye it's not it's generally not degrading eating salad yeah it's fucking degrading when shouldn't it be

like a go at it it's got a do in here no it's just I put like I was like here we fucking go and like

because I know I'm with you right you know if we're having a barbecue right and then somebody decides that we'll have a salad right I'm not going to fucking rally

against having a salad but also if no one mentioned it, I wouldn't realise until after once. I'm not like, there's my burger at the barbecue, now it would be nice. But when you do, you put it on and someone makes it, that's a nice bit of crunch, you put crisps on your burger.

Oh, that would be good, yeah. I mean, I absolutely would. You're too high about not smoking weed. I absolutely would. This is like when I poured a cup of tea on me with a mix and it worked. That was when I converted

to crispy onions was because I used to not... Is it crispy onions? Yeah. That's when I converted to that. I converted to crispy because I didn't like onions because I used to...

because they were just fucking wet and they felt like fucking slug-like and ugh. And then somebody made them crunchy and I was like, all right, I get into that. And then I was able to work back

I can't believe you're talking about onions like it's a bush took a trial it's just one of the one of the staples of every meal chopped up fine

but why is it why are you having big fucking see onion rings uh uh oh no no onions bit of butter on

they're crispy Scottishified it but if you take an onion ring there's always biting into an onion ring there's always biting into an onion ring there's always that fucking time

when sometimes the full onion comes out and it's like you know when you pull a bogey and it comes from the back of your

fucking brain like a full fucking like he's a conundrum this man he eats oysters I love oysters don't chew them though

don't chew them under any circumstance yeah wait what are you getting from them to be honest with you I think it's like the vinaigrette I think

upon reflection I think I just like the vinaigrette the Tabasco and the oh like I think it's that which you can put on crisps

you're like I'm a posh twat and I've got to fucking do the posh twat thing I'm pretending like it entirely with posh twat things I like having half it. Entirely with posh twash things, I like having half an avocado sliced down with a bit of soy sauce

topped in a little hole and then some crispy onions and eat it with a spoon. That sounds nice. Dynamite, mate. Don't record this. That's genuinely worse than the fucking kid in your primary school when he opened his lunch box,

had the kiwi in the spoon. God, I wanted to kick his head in. That wasn't happening in my school. Kids would just come in with half a fucking kiwi. I'm like, you're fucking, you're lucky. You're lucky a bear came around yesterday and talked to us about bullying. Otherwise, you're getting

thrown through a fucking wall for that I would be there with a white bread premier cheese sandwich and a rocky robin that was my packed lunch

and his kiwi spoon in his fucking eye I reckon kiwi is one of the premium fruit though if you're making us a packed lunch and you're chucking

a bit of fruit in like banana first banana first the worst fruit oh that's mad you dress like one you're putting banana

you're dressed like one you're the only one not dressed like a banana because I've given it you're a fucking bloob thanks man are you sure about that that's the thing

I was ever saying it was blueberries I'd put that in for bananas would you aye yeah they're just not very filling but are they you need loads of them Are you sure about that? That's the thing I was ever saying. Blueberries, I'd put that whole banana. Would you? Aye. Yeah. They're just not very filling, but you need loads of them.

Who's giving you one blueberry? What sad, sad packed lunch was your... No wonder you fucking ate the kid with the kiwi. What did you get, Guy? A single blueberry. Oh, man. Go and say a single blueberry in your most Geordie accent. Who ate my blueberry?

My single blueberry. Bloob. Who's got me bloob? Yeah, and I hate us. Yeah. Reciting. What a banter. Yeah.

But over Christmas, Cullen Says his family Had been rowing Because the sausage Was missing Not Not Not Not a sausage

Was missing But the sausage Was gone The Cullen family sausage Everyone was doing a bit To say Who ate the family sausage Once again

The annual sausage Anyway Oh It's just Treacherous Do you think it's just treacherous. Do you think it's bad form? It's awful form. It just...

It's just fucking... Matt, you're showing someone the making of a movie they never fucking watched. That's what it is every single time without fail. It's never good. It's never good. I mean, if you showed a bit of gusto and just tried to put

some vinegar in having the one family sausage and it caused a riot in his house because the sausage was gone it was being made

a mystery I'm glad you enjoyed it in the moment but that moment stop living in the past man you can't be talking about fucking meditation

and be like oh this funny thing happened in December allow me to bring it nah live here right now I prefer him when he's drunk, you know.

I'm starting to see why weed works for him. Oh, don't, don't. Don't give me any more reasons. Actually, how's Cullen's rage when he's not allowed to smoke? Heaps better, man. Me and him have just been like, I think for him, because I've, you know,

it's fucking cyclical for me. I go through phases where I'll not do weed for him, because I've, you know, it's fucking cyclical for me. I go through phases where I'll not do weed for a while because sometimes I feel out of control. So I get fucking control back and then I feel good. And then I gradually will start smoking weed again. I'll be out of control. And it's just, I mean, Cara has to live with this fucking constantly. Colin has smoked weed 24-7 since he first moved in with me five years ago, right? He'd never smoked weed before.

And I was like... Out for free. Oh, yeah. i think one day like there's an unlimited supply of weed here oh yeah yeah try and get through it so i can stop i think it was like uh i'd gone away and i'd left the fucking pen there and he just went he's like do you mind if i give it a go and i'm like yeah man just lie on your back and watch a movie you'll love it and he was like it makes every movie better and I'm like buddy it makes everything better

man if you think movies are class eat some food drink some water like working out it's class

when you're everything is objectively better when you're fucking yeah listen to fucking podcasts

sure you might have to go back you might miss out on the occasion gaming's better driving's class syncing yourself to the whatsapp taking the piss with your mates

it's all great it's all good being a podcast being a father so I'm just not getting enough out of this I need to somehow

amplify this so I can enjoy it more he's laughing heaps but I just don't get it I just don't get it. I just don't get it. So this is Colin's first time coming fully off of it. And yeah,

I mean, he's also doing the same thing. He's like, he feels heaps better, but he's eating better. He's working out more. And he's like, it's the best I've ever felt in my life.

And I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Trust me, you will go, regardless of how good you feel right now after a full month even a month and a half of this you'll be in the best shape of your life you'll have the best mental clarity you'll ever have your fucking life and I will offer you a joint you'll be like 100% of course

of course of course right now and then every day forever after this that mental clarity thing that's one thing that I fucking hate that about when I done dry January is I got to lay fucking 19th of January or something like that and I fucking set away the coffee machine without a cup in it. This is fucking coffee just spilling

through the front of my washing machine. I'm just there going, where are you man, what's the point of not drinking? I might as well be hammered. Might as well be fucked up. I have an excuse for that would be bullshit

I feel I feel much better but again I'm also very aware that I've been working out solidly for like two and a half months and I hate

how good exercise is for your mental health oh it's the worst fucking worst I got so I basically decided I'm in mid thirties I don't need to be in good shape doesn't matter don't need physical health and then they're like oh mental health too fuck off health. Oh, it's the worst. Fucking worst. I got so, I basically decided I'm in mid thirties.

I don't need to be in good shape. It doesn't matter. I don't need physical health. And then they're like, no, mental health too. Fuck off. Yeah.

Things are hand in hand, man. Also, it's like hard to get back to all that you get. So if you can keep some kind of fucking maintenance schedule

in your thirties, I'm not going to have 40 new and I'm like, I don't want to let it slip otherwise it's gone forever. It'll get past the point of no return.

I've stopped doing sports. The only thing I do is I play a lot to let it slip otherwise it's gone forever it's bad though it'll get past the point of no return I've stopped doing sports the only thing I do is I play a lot of poker what sports did you do? I would have breath played poker I would have breath got a stitch in that

all these poker players now were like gym nuts they're like no no you need to be in good shape you need to be switched on good posture this and that

I was like fucking even sitting down playing cards I need to be ripped oh because they're thinking about if you're in shape and you're not drinking and your mind's clear you're like making quick maths

keep focus for longer yeah because sometimes you're playing for 12 hours or something and you're just like yeah i read an article like chess players burn a silly amount of calories just sitting there thinking for eight ten hours or something with a bishop yeah yeah it's bad there's no is this an aloe and law sketch you just felt naughty I'm on the podcast that's all a naughty joke

risky getting back into shape now I'm going back to my PT because I was my man I'm

getting I'm getting I'm getting back to my PT Because I was Man I'm getting I'm getting I'm getting I'm back to my PT I'm getting married in May So I'm doing this I'm very much off Of the same thing you are

Which is you Fair to say that On your wedding day Was the best shape You've been in In your life Aye He could chin me now

Aye He could kick fucker to me now Aye I want That's a worry like I couldn't beat old me in a fight

yeah but you're also knocking on 40 and he was what oh he was only 36 wasn't he aye but he was doing white

high leg every day aye but were you in better shape were you in better shape I'm in better

shape now than when I was on steds really yeah aye so I was lifting 34 kilo dumbbells for bench press

when I was 21 when I was on steroids because I was super skinny before I took them. I come from that base. I'm using 40 kilo dumbbells now to bench press. So, like, I'm way stronger than I was when I was 20. But you still reckon 36 kilos would be fucking chin you? Just to fucking my time, man. Like, I was in fucking shape.

I had good cardio. I was running marathons and shit. I was doing a sub 20 minute fucking 10k 5k 5k 5k

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I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I k twice back to back the 5k i'd done in my 30s it was faster than that twice back to back so that was even a shadow of me before myself and fitness wise who was chasing you how is it possible you ran a 10k faster i was ginger and wore glasses in the 90s i was always running um i remember because when you got into that immaculate fucking shape your biggest complaint at the time and and I remember laughing about it, was the fact that Natalie could not have given less of a shit.

She couldn't care less about how bad I was? Aye. Because you were fucking ripped and she just didn't give a shit. I'm not there yet, but obviously, at my worst during the fucking pandemic, I think I got up to like 92, 93 fucking kilos, right? And back when I was in my best shape, when I was like 25, I think I was down to about 74. 93 fucking kilos, right? And back when I was in my best shape, when I was like 25,

I think I was down at about 74. Weight doesn't fucking matter, by the way, because you could be 96 and it could all be muscle. Weight distribution, yeah. Weight doesn't fucking matter at all, but this is just for the perspective on me. I'm so self-conscious now

that somebody called this a lifestyle podcast. Man, I think that gives us too much credit. Who's listening to this podcast for advice? Like, if we inspire you, get better heroes. Yeah, well, he had to kill time. Don't just time kill us, nothing more. But anyway, yeah, feeling in good shape. Feeling in good shape.

And, you know, I can feel the fucking 26-year-old narcissism creeping back in when I'm like, oh, this is good. And what I've done is I've put Cara in an impossible position. They tied her up like a pretzel. She would love that. Got her legs over her head. I've put her in an impossible position. Because we've been together for five years

and because she's seen me just cycle through all my different fucking phases of now i'm depressed and i'm fine with weight and now i'm gonna get back into shape and now i'm clean and over and over again i'm in really good shape and i'm like do you find me more attractive she's like i'm not answering that fucking question no i don't find you more attractive and i'm like well i'm like i'm like why you don't see and she's like no i don't kind of drinking in that she's like she's, this is for you and I'm glad it's for you and I'm glad I'm going to fucking make you feel better.

And I'm like, and I'm just doing that thing. I'm like, give me fucking, admit that I look better now than I did when I was 92 fucking kilos. And, and she just won't do it.

And do you know why she won't do it? Because she fucking knows in three years I'm going to be 92 kilos again and I'm going to be sad. I'm going to be like, you loved me more when I was skinny and in shape and she's going to be like you piece of shit

this is all a trap this is all this is she's just hedging her bets because she's got a little fat you soon she did like she loves she kind of

for whatever reason loves me for who I am on the inside not the surface me definitely not the surface me that was funny as fuck when I was just looking in the mirror

just in absolute disbelief At me fucking unachievable goals body And just My last just won't even glance at it Straight You're fucking lesbian You fucking Leather

You fucking gatherer Go on Go on Go and pick some fucking turnip To see a fucking gathering bitch But one thing new when she spoons me

in bed damn it she'll feel my muscles feel my chest and that and I'm like I hate that bitch

fucking right eh get that doing you Slut You were trying not to look weren't you Keep your hands off us Look at you Wake up man I'm tired of you So funny

Crying So when's it gonna end then when you gotta pull the ripcord and blow it up after the wedding no cause I'd like to well

in my head the dream would be to obviously get into very good shape for the wedding and then just do manageable man there was

four years five years of my life where I was the only reason I got out is when our touring became hellish yeah 2019 that was when it all

fucking broke for me and followed by a lockdown where I would just become a slobber so I know that I can't and now the way we're touring now I know it's very possible to like stay

you know in decent enough shape where I'm happy and exercise regularly enough that my fucking mental health is good and fucking benefits from it but then I'm also like

definitely on honeymoon like if we're gonna if we're gonna be honeymoon pics I'd like to be Good for those Just so You're going to the Maldives as well aren't you So

Gotta be poses of Instagram on there Yeah Yeah But then also It's really Like man I've missed booze Like I've missed booze And I've certainly missed fucking weed

And I've missed crisp sandwiches And I've missed booze and I've certainly missed fucking weed. And I've missed crisp sandwiches. And I've missed monster munch wraps. Like I've missed all, you know, the one food group. Skips paninis. Yeah, that sounds so good. That sounds really good. I've missed cuevas and pita bread. Yeah, I mean, hey, I know you're doing jokes here,

but every single one of these I would genuinely fucking eat well baked and have some watsits on toast you could put Doritos in a burrito that would be fine it's culturally sensitive yeah yeah I do

whenever we've got like leftover chilli con carne I make it like I put it in the middle of a wrap and then you put cheese on top of that and then you put

a little bit fucking hot sauce and then sometimes if you put like tomatoes in that you fold it and you toast it on both sides

oh it's good oh it's good deep fried alright would you deep fry a burrito I wouldn't I don't think there's no border

between Mexico and Scotland but I think doing that would start a war I don't think. There's no border between Mexico and Scotland. But I think doing that would start a war. I don't think there's anything the Scots haven't tried at deep fry. It's like, you know, when I was trying to find a dog pun for the dog park and all the dog puns were taken as soon as you Googled them. I reckon you'd not find an item of food that hasn't been deep fried. Oh, genuinely. Because there's at least one place in each fucking district of Scotland,

one little fucking chip shop that will be like, if you bring it in and you give us three quid, we'll fry it. Deep fried oyster. Oh, man, that's not even... That's a legit thing. That's a legit thing. Yeah, I've heard of that. People serve that in posh restaurants.

But you're not meant to chew them. And you can't just... No, you are meant to chew them. You are meant to chew oysters. Yeah. Aye. Like, I think real oyster lovers... That's funny, that, because I always thought you were just meant to chew them You are meant to chew oysters Aye Aye Like I think real oyster lovers That's funny that

Because I always thought You were just meant to Down the hatch The rarest deep fried oyster That's the thing Yeah yeah So I thought I thought you were meant

To go down the hatch I think it was Maxwell Told us when When Fish has Which is a really nice Safe food restaurant In Portobello No in Leith

There's also one in The centre of Edinburgh So I thought you were just making it down the hatchet. That's what I always thought because the first time I had one I ended up like half biting it and then thinking

I'd done it wrong. But sometimes they're massive. Yeah, when we were in Thailand because again, I want the oysters, I want the fucking vinaigrette, I just want to throw it down the back.

These ones were this fucking big and I had to chew them and that was like, oh, I don't like oysters. That was Rick it's good as well that he'd like fresh ones

from up north of Scotland and he put it I think he put it at my chin and I just nicked it I think it was when he was here for your birthday he'd come down from that way

took us into the van again under the guise of having coke I'm having oysters but at least he did have coke that time made you do it off the shell clean this.

I went like, if you had down the hatch and you just look, I can't, why did you do that? He was like, you willed that in us? He's like,

what did you do that for? I mean. No, I couldn't, I couldn't chew them. They're just, I mean, they're big commie bogeys. They're just big

sea commie bogeys. You're all texture then, aren't you? Crisp you? You like all sorts of crispy food? You've absolutely nailed me on the fucking head there. Zach from Auntie Donna, you'll remember this, laughs so much because I'm a huge Auntie Donna fan, my brother's a huge Auntie Donna fan and I'm also friends with the Auntie Donnaona It doesn't stop you Being massive fans Of your friends So they're over in Edinburgh I want to take

The Anecdona boys Out for lunch So they can be my family So they can be my brothers And being the Anecdona boys They come out And we take them To the Dome

In Edinburgh And I don't think They tried Haggis, Napes and Tatties And I was like You've got to do it

With the whiskey sauce it's got to be amazing and man they loved the meal they were entertaining they've even had photos with us all

and afterwards I think I was drinking with Zach and he was just like there's just it's very obvious that in Scotland

you're all raised with no texture like everything is just mush and flavour. Don't be wrong, it's very flavourful. He's like, it's very flavourful.

You just blend all this stuff and put it on my meal. The only crunch you have is... Crisps. Crisps that you brought home. Or deep fried chips. And man, I get defensive. You know what I'm like? I get defensive sometimes when I feel I'm under attack

and I get defensive about Scottish stuff. But I really fucking still, I'm like, oh God sometimes when I feel I'm under attack I get defensive about Scottish stuff but I really fucking still I'm like oh god it's genuinely a texture thing for me yeah you never get weaned off baby food

no just carry on I think it's the one for you one for me but I think it comes from our parents

fucking generation of you and me were talking about this earlier like this fucking for some reason in the 1920s

parents just decided we've got to blend food for babies, otherwise babies will choke, despite the fact that babies had eaten solid food for half a million years, whatever the... Since the days of gatherers? Aye Look, if there were days of gatherers, none of us would be here.

Do you think just a high profile baby choked and then everyone went... Like one of the Kingscapes? Maybe that was the original story of the princess and the pea, she just choked on a pea. And they were like, well, we gotta... I don't know. Or maybe it was like, like I mean I always feel like whenever you attack something in the past

like this some fucking pension I'll be like it's because we were poor and you're like oh well I guess I can't make fun of you then

I've no idea what it was but man I I well most festivals I complain about not liking

if you blend them up and put them in a super smoothie down the hatch wouldn't give a fucking shit it is texture so you know that revelation

where you're like oh the old people did it wrong and we're just kind of like no offence he's done it wrong but like we're

going to correct it now with a lot of techniques that we're using yes it worked for us back then but like but it also

didn't work because you were having world wars and you had different standards for life and different priorities

you had to have kids in case one ran out so what do you think it is that you're doing now that you're just like is there anything where you're like oh the tide's gonna get out on this i'll start with one i think uh using the ipad as a babysitter is going to fuck up attention spans on us yes yeah 100% oh definite man we have

I mean me and Cara watch lots of television that's not new not all used to do that yeah yeah but I do worry about

the fucking size of our TV in our living room I'm like is Caelan going to live the rest of his life just constantly believing that just out of his periphery Toy Story

is playing at all times it's an entertainment wall that's alive yeah I certainly do get worried Constantly believing that just out of his periphery toy story is playing all the time Yeah, I do I certainly do get worried about that but also the one thing that gives me confidence in it man Sometimes he'll just he couldn't give a shit about the fucking TV. Sometimes he's like got his stuff Yeah, I hope maybe it's like the other way that it's like ties. Yes complete It's not like a you know, it not a dictative it's just ambivalent I wonder this because my parents were very firm

on not having a TV in your bedroom and stuff so the second I had a hint of independence I was watching just TV all the time falling asleep

with the TV on just everything and now I've moved back from it but I wonder if I was just that kind of something that I

wasn't allowed to do as a kid 100% me and Cara talk about why we're picky eaters and it's because both of us, both of our grandparents

did the exact same fucking thing to us which was you're not leaving the table until you eat all of those fucking peas and all that did was firm in my fucking head

peas are objective torture. Like that's what it is. It's a situation where you're not allowed to eat entertainment. Currency. It's currency for joy Yeah and it's like

I'm not allowed It's the P's are just And that's why It's in my fucking head As you know This thing I think there's

I mean Like there's ways to pay And I'm not going to say That my ways are the best Because I can even tell At the moment I'm like I'm doing

An okay job And you know what I'm fine with that doing an okay job and you know what I'm fine with that as long as he's fucking happy today though I go on no no you go

I was going to say that's where I think like poverty comes into play with like you're eating because you go you didn't want that like that's how we've got in aye

so like enjoy being hungry if you don't want it like your dad will have it I would have starved instead of eating peace like aye

aye I think I think I my gran gave up because I sat there want it like your dad will have it i would have starved instead of eating peas like i i think i i i think i my gran gave up because i sat there for 45 minutes i'm like i'll fucking sleep at this table instead of eating those fucking peas apart from today well you can't right so i the rule is and this is a rule for everyone in a blank rule you're not allowed to comment on somebody else's parenting right everyone's got their own methods everyone's got their own beliefs everyone's got their own

fucking systems you're not allowed to comment and I say that because if anyone were to comment on my parenting I know how instantly fucking defensive I would get being like

how fucking dare you judge me on this fucking one snapshot you get one little view into my fucking day you don't know how the rest of my day's gone you don't know how

fucking stressful it's been you don't know how many times i tried to make something work with that and this was the compromise that you're looking at you've no idea you've no idea so like anytime i see parents doing things that i wouldn't do i'm just like the man not your kid who gives a fuck not your problem today at messy play like cara had to almost physically fucking restrain me There was a one year old girl Walking around And this kid has just learned to walk Right Great

She's toddling around It's exciting She's smiling She loves walking She is holding In both hands Two fully sharpened pencils What are they doing at Messy Play?

So there's There's a little bit where you can draw and stuff and they're sat down and you're meant to be behind them and this mum... Supervised scribbling. Yeah, yeah. And this mum is just following her daughter, she falls over all the time, I'm like... She's carrying shots. And I can't talk, I'm getting this fucking anxiety.

I remember being eight years old and it was the day fucking mum told me she was pregnant with you by the way I remember this fucking vividly used to come home from school right mum would have my fucking lunch there fucking sandwich

with crisps on it right and she's I get in and there's a pregnancy test on the table she's like do you know what that is

and I'm like no no what the fuck was that she's like well it's sticks of piss tasting it too

Is that the toy out of the sugar puffs God they're getting worse And she was like It's a pregnancy test And I was like I got very fucking Excited And

I don't know what I don't think it was casually But it was some like Daytime Thing where Oh it's a hospital fucking show. A kid was walking on a wall on his way home from school and he fell off the wall

and then like a pencil pierces his lung and comes out his fucking chair. In retrospect, I don't know what pencil's long enough to go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. You can get a look at your neck. Yeah, you can see it.

It was screwed up. It was from a gift shop. Yeah, there's London ones you can get at Trafalgar Square. That's just going on in my mind and like I'm there with Caelan and I'm not man

I'm being a bad dad I'm not paying attention to anything my son could have been throwing fucking uranium at this point that kid's probably watching whatever

Caelan was doing his dad but Cara's there I'm like oh man I'm like I'm like I was probably watching whatever Killian was doing. His dad. But can I say, I'm like, oh man, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I have to say something. This is objective. Like, man, at one point,

the kid had the fucking pencil in its mouth while walking. And the mum's like, she'll put anything in her mouth. I'm like, she's about to die. You've got to show the Dark Knight, and then she'll learn. Yeah. Magic trick. What was that one? Back to die! You've got to show the Dark Knight in the initial then. Yeah, wham!

Magic trick. What was that one? The Joker makes a pencil disappear. The Joker, who wants to see a magic trick, puts a pencil on the table and makes this disappear. Slams the fucking head down. Yeah, it's only a 16-year-old film. You need to... I know, right?

You need to catch up on that. That parroting thing, I remember when I was a lifeguard, you used to just people watch all the time. I saw this toddler came in maybe similar age just after one just walking

he's got like one of the nappy swimming things on and just like walks around the whole circumference of the pool and it's not like a square pool

it's like a kind of play one where it's like fucking bits thing jutting out and just walking around and I'm just watching I'm fascinated

I'm just ignoring everyone else this dad's on a leash here getting dragged around by this kid and he's just there following just bored out of his mind

in his trunks and all that and he gets all the way around full circle of the high chair and he just looked at me and went never have kids

and I'm like that's your advice for you you should have took that advice like what are you doing having kids like the one year old's in charge

yeah like going to the pool and I'm about to blow the whistle and your time's gonna be up and you haven't had a swim because you let a one-year-old decide like what the fuck are you doing absolutely madman it must be hard not to come in but oh it is what did i said about like someone shouting at a baby oh man that's abuse waiting to happen so he's he's told us

this fucking story hold on Matthew censor his name yeah yeah Matthew can you take a time

of this and censor out the name we just said there so a friend of ours was telling us that

a friend of theirs who none of us know has like an eight, nine month old baby and

they went out for dinner with them and their baby and like during the dinner the baby's like making noises and knocking things off the fucking high chair because it's a nine month old baby.

And apparently the dad will yell at this kid and be like, let's say the kid's name's Tony. Be like, Tony, stop that. Stop that now. And you... Oh. Another clip there.

What was that their name? No, no, no. I said the other name. Right. So my friend... Hold on, I'll give you something to edit. Elliot Steele. So he's telling this story.

And I'm like, man, if that was me i i think i would i would no i wouldn't scream at the dad i would take the dad through to another room and scream at him there being like how can you you i understand i don't condone i understand yelling at a three-year-old a four-year-old i understand getting to the end of your tether and they're doing something and you're exhausted and the only thing you do, and you regret it. Of course, if you're a good parent, you fucking regret yelling at your kid. But you're assuming that the shouted baby guy

is the person that listens to Reason. You cannot shout at, I think, well, I don't think you should shout at any kids because all you're doing is teaching them that shouting is scary. There's nothing you actually teach them in that apart from if you're louder, you get to be in charge and you get to scare people.

That's what I feel the fucking lesson is. But at eight months old, what are you fucking doing, you psychopath? If I yelled at my kid, I'd want them to go to their brother or whatever. I'd just say, I've never heard that yell. Yeah. I want to reserve that and never use it yeah yeah and then them just stay again what the like yes this must be us yeah you want the time that you yell for your kids to be like we up and we i mean that

was us in our house like our mom you never dad yelled and but again didn't yell at us when we're babies dad yelled when we were teenagers. And because, and trust me, when I was a teenager, I was absolutely worth yelling at. And I was yelling at him. Fair enough. And it's so easy for me to sit there with me, Stanton Yellen, as someone that's never had kids.

Oh, this is it, totally. The other day, I scruffed both my cats because they stole some fudge. So I think I'd be a terrible parent. What did you do to them? I started to scruff them. I think I might launch them into the kitchen. scruff them and like launch them into the kitchen. Scruff them? Put them in the streets? Joyfulness?

You fucks. Scruff. No I think so our friend he was like do I say something to this? I'm like you say something to the fucking, what wife's letting that happen? What mum is like,

oh, you know, this is how he deals with my favourite thing in the world. Talks to me like that. Yeah. Oh, but also when you hear that happen,

you're like, your relationship with your father is fucking awful. Like, I guarantee this guy has never hugged his dad. His dad has, you know,

it's just, it's fucking learned behavior but you gotta stop the fucking cycle like oh gross but i do want to say shit sometimes like i think it is i've said this time and time again it's in my fucking book i think it's fucking insane that people are just allowed to have children you have to study and take a test and have a license to have a car. And if you're a bad driver, you never get to drive a car again. The car is taken away from you. If you're a bad driver, you get sent to fucking jail.

Sometimes you're that bad at fucking driving. To drink alcohol, you've got to be... To teach somebody anything, you need to have a diploma and that subject. Yeah, just go out to someone. Go on, teach them everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But don't need any experience. I'll say it once, I'll say it again.

The solution to this fucking problem is at the age of 14, you take every boy, right? You know how girls get HPV jabs? No. Like the cervical cancer jabs when they're on foot. I don't know if they still get it now.

I did not, but yeah. Oh, but when we were in high school, there was a time when all the girls were taken out of the class and we're like where are the girls going and the teachers go shut up like okay and it's they're getting their jags boys don't uh need them similar time you take the boys 14 year old boys you take them into a room they've all got their own little cubicle right and in that cubicle is hella porn it's just way too much porn for a fucking 14-year-old, right? And what you do

is you collect the semen. You let the kid do what it's got to do and you're aiming that as best you can, right? And you get them to write their name on it. I would not trust the teacher that volunteered for this role. I'd be like, something's up.

Well, look, we're solving two problems here. We're like, we're taking volunteers. Okay, volunteers, jail. And everyone who shirked back, you're perfect for the job. we're solving two problems here we're like this we're taking volunteers okay volunteers jail and everyone who shirked back you're perfect for the job

you are who we wanted haha and then you give their file and you put it in a fucking freezer somewhere in the world and then you give that boy

a little fucking vasectomy and you give him a week off school and free ice cream right and you're like there you go and by the way and now you can go have sex right we don't think you should and you give them a week off school and free ice cream, right? And you're like, there you go. And now you can go have sex, right? We don't think you should, and you should still wear condoms

because condoms are important. In a blive school, they'd be like, thank fuck for that, I've already got three kids. But then... This does sound very much like something off of a handmaid's tale or something like that.

But man, you have to... You're creating a bleak society. No, I'm not creating a fucking bleak society. I would say 60% of, globally, globally, 60% to 70% of people who are parents should objectively not be parents. They have too many fucking unresolved issues themselves. They're bad people.

They're abusive. They have too many fucking problems they're just and by the way if I'm part of that list cool fair enough maybe

I'll come and reset the test if I want it that badly yeah you come back every year and you're like right I've been clean for five years you know what

I've studied I've gone back to fucking university I say back to university I've gone to university if that's important but I don't think it should be

just based on an education thing but you just get it like based on like your drug use is like a fucking instant no and you're just like oh shut up man I know people

that are worse much worse parents that have never touched a spliff because that's where their line in the sand is but if that was the fucking rules and they were like

you've got to be clean I'd be like okay well I guess I can do four years without fucking weed yeah if I went in and they were like

you're not getting your sperm back until you're off weed I'm like well that's shit but okay if that's the growing I have to do that you've you know

if enough facts prove that two stoners are terrible parents fair enough I'll well she'll take on the chin but you know I guess we'll not be

parents for the fucking time being I think it's because it's pretty grueling if you want to adopt it's really grueling I've been I've worked alongside somebody that went through that process and it was just like the absolute most stable family ever,

like the pair of them. And like both working, both like absolute drug free, don't really drink that much, never smoked and all that. Just like perfect family, just happened to be infertile. And what they had to go through to get a child was fucking insane. And there's fucking scum everywhere. Just popping them fucking out. Hitting them.

Fucking them. Abusing them. Not feeding them. Neglecting them. Making them support Sunderland. Aye. Just horrific shit. Just.

And people are like, oh, you know, that's the way life's got to be. Disagree. Disagree. Compulsory vasectomies. And also vasectomies can be reversed so you know you can and once you get to 30

and then you get back back street vasectomy reversal well wait sorry is that like the operation or a band nah there'll be vets

doing it yeah we do there'll be vets doing reverse vasectomies doing a little bit of cash in hand I made a joke rolled over it

but also rolled back over it Yeah No no no Rolled back over it I can't I can't wait for you To bring it up In seven podcast times And be like

Seven weeks ago Daniel did this Really funny thing And it Whoa whoa whoa That wasn't that good None of the ones You bring up with that

Reverse vasectomy Is a bad name It wasn't as good as Cullen's family sausage it's gotta be worth bringing back up I think you ruined that one actually

I'm gonna put it out there I'll get I'll I think there's a vasectomy in my life I think yeah

one of my mates had a vasectomy at 21 at 21 I've done the joke before but Grassy had a vasectomy because he had three kids.

Yeah, yeah. He was 21. Fucking weird. Yeah, but that's so funny. Imagine being that fucking doctor, man. Being like, do you have cancer? And you've got four years to live

and you're just going to fuck as many people as you want? You've also seen Grassi. You know they would go, you do know this 35-year-old man has got 21 written on his form I think there's charts the nurse will be

like no no no no no I'm sorry are you calling the African football a scam it's his Wayne grassy here not Obafemi Martins

he got the snip I'd yeah I'd I'd definitely get it Because I As much as Cara's like You know it's fine we'll stop at two If she was in charge I think every time a child of ours

Gets to like two years old She'd be like It's not a baby anymore Don't get me wrong I love him I think he's great It's not a fucking baby And I love newborn I think he's great he's not a fucking baby and I love newborn babies get it in me

and I just I gotta snip gotta cut the supply off is that you'd rather cut yourself open and cut bit too

than wear condoms yeah yeah I'm sorry I'm sorry is there a man in the

world who doesn't say the man who got his eye taken out and snipped so I didn't have to wear

glasses yeah doesn't say the man who got his eye taken out and snipped so I didn't have to wear glasses yeah man like I it's I find it so amazing like all the advancements

in health science I'm surprised like as a bro like because you're a bro like you wouldn't find it like

emasculating what to be my spunk my spunk isn, emasculating. What, to be? My spunk isn't my fucking value. I mean, it used to be. I was trying to sell you as a bro. No, man, I've got no... Are there people out there who would feel emasculated if they got the present? People do that with their dogs, man.

Like, fucking put secondhand masculinity on their dog. Oh, that was a thing, yeah. I think it's more a US thing, but... I've had, like, a family friend that was just like oh I wouldn't chop my dog's bowels off like

it's like but it's acting aggressive towards that dog it's humping the girls it's humping the people yeah people put way too much of their

their own personality or their own their own insecurity probably yeah yeah totally yeah that's fucking mad that

yeah you didn't know that no but those okay here we go those people aren't like dogs Yeah, yeah, totally, yeah. That's fucking mad, that. Yeah, it's so weird. No. Okay, here we go. Those people aren't like dogs. Right, that's my fucking rule. Sorry, you failed the test. You get a goldfish, right?

And if you can keep that goldfish until they're nine years old, and by the way, I know they only live to three, but if you can get that goldfish to nine years old, you get a dog, you fucking psychopath. They do it with all things. They do it with diet as well. They're like, so raw feeding is kind of a bit fatty with dogs at the moment.

It's not good. It's probably not necessarily that good and it really depends on who manufactures it. And there might be some health issues associated with it. But people are like... Is this the generation that's finding out? Yeah, exactly. And then people are like, well, but you know,

when they were wolves, they were like, your fucking Cavapoo was never a wolf. Excuse me, but why did you pick Cavapoo? You know what? It was a pug until I was like, oh, wait, no, actually. Cavapoo is far better for this. Yeah, you're right, though. Like, there's been, like, all the genetics

that made them a wolf. Whatever they've got, yeah. They're fine on whatever the pet food is it's just that then people started making really shit pet foods in the same way that like exactly yeah exactly so yeah but that doesn't necessarily mean that all burgers are bad yeah and yeah i still i just can't believe with everything that we've fucking done in the world right with man like not that we've cured cancer yet yet, but we've cured lots of cancers. Like, you know, people are living with it.

Cures there, they just haven't released it. Yeah, the fucking tinfoil hat. There's no way condoms are the best option. There's no way. There's no way. There's no way. And not just in the sense that, like, I don't want to have kids. But to prevent STDs.

A fucking bag over your dick. That's it. That's the fucking best we got. They're fucking satellites. And you're chipping her. And I've got to wear a bag on my cock. Fuck off. And I'm not saying the woman has to do it.

I'm not being like it's their responsibility. I get it. I'm the one with the spunk. It's my fucking responsibility. But to my bro scientists out there, a bag on the deck is the best

you've got a degree use it why is there a bag on my fucking deck and why are they all disposable

why can't you get a permanent one stitch one on stitch a tooth there should just be like a fucking

this seems like it's gonna be a set a path off anyone watched cloudy with the jams and meatballs you know he's got the spray on shoes it's like a bat it didn't feel like a span off

it's only a bad energy it's everything matthew fluff the cut fluff the cat is also what happens after a percentage but he's got like he decides that he's gonna get spray on shoes and he sprays on shoes and then like

how do you get them off and he can never get them off and there's a thing surely there's got to be not a permanent one

like a fucking spray on condom just like a lube isn't there like a thing that you can

put in there to plug it up for a bit oh I already hate whatever especially with this you've literally just killed the mood

and the sex I'm not having. Not even having sex now, I'm not interested, I'm having a headache. There's a cock cork. I think so. I'm not 100% on this, but I think there's some sort of way.

Here comes the champagne, baby. Fucking hell, you'll be like Lewis Hamilton. I mean, I've not looked into it because obviously not. Are you going to put your eye out? Fucking hell. Are you taking all my fun?

Are you taking all the battles? Are you having a good time, Gallo? Right, you've got a gig. I've got to get to the stand. And I've got to get a baby to sleep. And then once Sid's asleep, you're going to come to the game

yeah go play with Caelan and let my fiance go out and have some freedom I keep saying like it's much like she's going to go

out and have her freedom she doesn't want to leave the baby I want that on fucking record if it was up to her she would be staying inside with her son

but like her friends are like come on let's have a night out and she's like should I and I's like should I and I'm like yes you deserve it you should

is she going to be texting you checking in how he's doing she's because he's he's not had enough naps today he said like two half an hour naps

so he's a bit fucking grumpy when he woke up he was just kicking off with me and she's already like if if you struggle putting him to bed just text me immediately

I'm like I'm not going to do that I'm not texting you there's no way I'm texting you do you want way I'm texting you I don't want to ruin your night or anything but this is a nightmare

dry January is over and the baby's in the hot tub I've been there too was just stressed relax and unwind let's go do all them things

let's go do see you all next oh thank you to Sid for jumping on the podcast just come in as a little audience member see you all next oh thank you to Sid for jumping on the podcast just coming as a little audience member there and we didn't

ask you to be naked so last guest was nope don't mention it no it didn't happen see you next time you