Sloss and Humphries On The Road - Ep 4.6 Otherwise Engaged

Episode Date: February 8, 2021

Recorded one hour before Cream makes a life changing decision, the boys excitedly discuss the events which are about to unfold (and also the budesliga) the fact this podcast is being published suggests that either the events unfolded favourably or Muggins is a real willy head for publishing it.

Good evening boys and germs, or morning whenever it is. Welcome to another episode of Sloss and Humphreys On The Road for today, Monday the fucking whatever of fucking February, I think. This one is a special podcast where we talk about things. It's a subtle podcast. You're giving too much away. Aye. You'll just have to it's a secret one you're giving too much away aye you'll just have to listen and find out

in fact this introduction is pointless because all will be revealed go and listen to it go and listen to it it's great Sloss and Humphries

on the road Muggins and Cream creaming muggins straight thugging living the dream that's our intro fucking muggles tickling the clit

inside your head that makes you laugh they said it can't be done are we in the same seats that's hack oh muggles Tickling the clit inside your head that makes you laugh Woohoo Ha ha ha They said it can't be done Are we in the same seats? That's hack Oh, muggles Accidental rim job in the park Kiss, kiss, kiss

Or am I just being cynical? Just muggled it up on fucking Mugglepedia Where have you been since 9-11? Alright, ladies and gentlemen This is a very special podcast In that, you might never hear it Aye, it might be delayed or unlikely, but still a possibility. It might never come out.

Oh, well, just like in 10 years' time, we might bring it out of the archives. Like when we're going to just laugh at the misfortune of the situation. Aye, but in the future when I'm an alcoholic and a monster again. Aye, but I will always have this'm an alcoholic and a monster again. Aye, but I will always have this podcast. It's on my Mac. You can't take it away from me. It's not like all the photos I take of us on holidays and then never

save or send to you. And then back up to the cloud. Where's all those photos gone? Whenever I left my phone case. Whenever I need them. So the reason for it, right, it's quite serendipitous actually. We'll release the podcast on Mondays. We're being very regular. You're all in lockdown.

You need something to anchor on to. We're giving you a Monday release podcast. It's the best we can do. Aye. So I left my fucking charger in Daniel's studio. And then I was like, tell you what, if I come and pick it up on Thursday, that means we can do Monday's podcast. So this was always, always going to be a pre-record.

But now it has a twist. Aye. Now you're about to mention something that can't be known until after it happens. Yes, aye. So basically, I've bought a ring to propose to Canna with. And you're going to propose today. In a few hours. In a few hours after this podcast. Oh, this is content.

This is fucking content, man. Yes, the current time is fucking quarter past one. Once this is done, about half to, I think, about three me and her are going to go on a walk. Aye. Are you going to take us somewhere like

the cliff edge? Aye. Aye. And then what I'm going to do is I'm just going. Are you going to take us somewhere like the cliff edge? Aye. Aye. And then what I'm going to do is I'm just going to get her up to the edge of a fucking cliff and then grab the back of her neck and then like rub her nose in it like a dog that's taken a shit somewhere that it shouldn't have taken a shit. What, in the ring? In the ring. And I'm going to go, say yes or I'll give it to your sister.

Oh, she might listen to this. The sister. Aye, she's going to say it. This will be like listen to this. The sister. Ah, she's got excited. She'll be like in 10 years' time when it comes out because she said no. This will be how she finds out if she does listen to the podcast. Oh, dear.

So the plan is, so I've decided back. I mean, I've known I was going to marry her for a while. Oh, yeah. It's blatantly obvious yous are a couple for good. Yes. Like, this ain't just some jump off, keeping you busy, keeping you shit warm. No, no, there's just everything.

Like, when you know, you know. Like, I often think, like, because she moved in in, like, January last year. And obviously, as the joke I do in the show, my girlfriend moved in in January because I thought I was going to be on tour for nine months, right? But that was what was expected. I was going to be on tour for nine months right but that was

what was expected I was going to be away a bit because when we started dating during X and stuff I only saw her like for two for a week in Australia

for two weeks in Australia one week in New York and then the rest of the tour was the very rare moments that we got home so we saw each other three months out of the first year we ever saw each other

so the second year of our relationship was going to be like slightly less like six months seen or six months not. And then the government was like, every second of every day. And we were like, well, this is the fucking deep end then.

Which is, it's perfect, because you don't have anything else to figure out. You know you can spend time apart and be sound. You know you can be under each other's feet and be sound. Like, you can't just be there and go, just give us a minute. I haven't quite figured it all out yet. The thing that took me so long

with Natalie is that I was in debt and I didn't want her to marry into my debt. I took a good few years just sorting that out. But you knew the same thing with you and Natalie. About a year and a half into that relationship, everyone was going, oh, there it is.

Your friends get into those relationships. People get into those relationships where you meet them and you just go, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah, well done. This is it. You've both nailed it. And then obviously you've got other friends when you're like, what have you done? No.

Her friends, you mean. Yeah, her friends. I was saying. I know that thing as well. I was so mismatched with Natalie that I was trying to work out what the catch was and you've worked out now that she spends ages looking at paint samples oh mate

fuck me man this paint sample game is ruining us now Oh, mate. Fuck me, man. This paint sample game is ruining us now. Because it's not just you go in and look at some paints and you ponder over paints. And now we've got bigger things to talk about, right? Everyone's at home now going, get back onto the engagement thing! The guys literally talk about,

no, no, listen to me and my wife talk about paint drying. No, no no no Forget the podcast running Daniel Listen to the ghost of Christmas future Here they tell you what my life is actually like You've got to do it for each room And you've got to do the paint samples on the wall And you've got to wait until different lights

Different times of day At night time with the lights on And during the day Oh no the sun's not up the day What and during the day oh no the sun's not up the day what if it's not nice when the sun's up it's in Scotland

we best be looking for paint that looks good in the rain we're not going to paint this until August which is meticulous and she enjoys it so I can't

lie for the rain she watches she watches mid-table clashes with me she supports Newcastle United now so this is the compromise

that you've both gone through but I mean which is a step up from Scottish football by the way oh yeah and I've been watching

a bit of Scottish football while I've been here and for the Premier League the charm well the Premier League is also but the thing is the thing I get

sort of a doubt when people compare the Scottish League to the Premier League you go no no no all other leagues let's not fucking pretend

League One is enthralling and all the fucking you've got PSG Marseille Lyon aye and I watched

and people are screaming why is Tyrone football he's got it for course but look this is his last hour of freedom this is the last chance

I'll ever just get to talk with one of my boys before I'm under the thumb of the old ball of change teeny tiny little

shackle on his finger so we're still going to get on doing this road the Bundesliga

when there was a month of Bundesliga oh right let's get back to the main topic give us a look

at the ring because you sure as well come in I actually whacked into here look over both shoulders and I went

have you picked the diamond yet because I've I've been on to you aye well I also told us I told you no no I was sleuthing

so I figured out the day you said I think I'm going to propose to Cara I was like I think he may be proposing soon

aye I told you back in January because there was there was basically just a point but obviously look we'd spent the last year living together and it was genuinely blessed we didn't argue once like Hi, I told you back in January, because there was basically just a point where obviously look, we'd spent the last year living together and it was genuinely blessed. We didn't argue once. Like, we lived together the entire fucking time. We went through all the range of emotions

from me going to be like fucking unemployed to me like sort of worrying about myself in the future to her working from home all being under each other each under each other's feet piece of piss so i'm genuinely the opinion to not propose at this point it's just rude just for the sake of the podcast there daniel wasn't about to start crying there that wasn't overcome with emotion he was holding in a burp Did it sound emotional? It sounded emotional. But I'm watching you just heaving this beer back. It sounds like you're just getting old. No, no, he's not human. Sorry, I was just, I was burping from my coffee. So is this you, like, going, instead of going,

oh, should I wait until, should I wait until me industry's back up and running, I'm back earning again? Or are you like, no, no, no, I need to tie her down now in case I need her. Well, it's also a thing of like we've had you know everyone

but us we've had holidays fucking cancelled we've had tours cancelled we've not been able to see things like it's been festivals cancelled

everything aye birthday we've been very very funerals cancelled man like it's shite aye

it's real shite and this is something I go it's a bit of fucking good news like she'll be because the wedding won't be for fucking years we're not having the wedding

until you know the world's open and everything and I'm back touring and everything so it's like you know that's a ways down the way but I didn't

I don't see the point in holding back the fucking promise for a bit like it's just both of us know aye like both of us

are very aware of it and this is just a bit of good fucking news which will like she'll be over the fucking moon for the next

couple of weeks yeah it's hump day well right so here's generally what fucking happens he's going to get us through the

week it's a left side decision stop trying to get to the weekend no it'll be class no no it'll keep her happy

until about March then I'll get her a dog and then no so I ordered it back in fucking

January right so to get the ring I have to phone up this fucking company and I'm like how

I want I can't come into your store right you need a consultation need a consultation I had that whole like fucking sitting down and discussing everything

and going through the the what like the whole fucking thing is a sit down chat right and you also made the ring aye yeah

like you were very involved in the process you dug the I learned how to melt the plastic from the little beads learned how to tie clovers together in that little way just braiding the reins together I just did learned how to tie clovers together in that little way just braiding their ends

together I just did they're out of use a glue they'll stick their fingers together basically what I learned to do is how to put a little bit of Haribo

into fucking liquid nitrogen and it just froze and came out dead nice that's good so I had to do it via video video fucking chat with this guy

and here's here's the thing. I don't mean this to sound bad, but I don't fucking know what ring she wants or what she likes. I don't know anything about the fucking ring. All I knew what I did want, I knew the thing that I want is, I wanted a factory fucking maid ring.

I wanted like a science maid, not a diamond that you find in the wild that's dug in a fucking mine, because there is absolutely no difference between a diamond that you find in the wild that's dug in a fucking mine because there is absolutely no difference between a diamond that's found in a mine

and a diamond that's made in a factory so much so that the diamond companies are paying millions and

millions and millions of pounds to desperately try and find any way of telling the difference between factory

made and regular and they can't do this will be with so it's just I'm the same man

I've got so many fake autographs in the house you can't tell you can't tell I know that it was nowhere near Heath Ledger aye but but nobody else does

yeah look I lost the photos Danny took the photo on his phone and we know he doesn't save his photos that's the only time but it's also like

I don't like the diamonds are just diamonds and it's he doesn't save his photos that's the only time but it's also like I don't like the diamonds are just diamonds and it's not about and especially for me and Cara right it's not about the fucking price of anything

like if Cara was the type of girl who gave a shit about how much a fucking ring cost she wouldn't be getting the ring you know there's no

blood on this as well which is oh made in China you know there's no blood on that I thought you were just going to shove it up your ass you know there's no blood on this? I thought you were just going to shove it up your ass.

You know there's no blood on this. Yes. For now. I'm looking at it, right? My first response to her, it's fucking beautiful, by the way. Thank you. She's going to like that a lot.

I hope. You hope. You hope I. I mean, she'd probably, even if she says no, she'll keep this. This is a good thing. You've done good. You've done good.

It's fucking tiny. Not the diamond, by the way. The diamond's nice. The ring. The hole. It's high. So when it arrived today, right, so they were like... No wonder I can always say,

yeah, put another one up through the walls when I live here. Cara, you're not touching the sides. It's like a game of Operation. Come on now. make my nose turn red make me nose turn red so when I say that Natalie she rims it

so I was they were like look it'll take a month to make because they make the whole thing from scratch whatever so I didn't know

when it was going to arrive and then they just phoned up yesterday and they do they were brilliant by the way fucking big shout out

to Queensmith Jewelers right they phone up from a different number than their own number right and they go

hello Mr. Sloss this is your insurance company I do they full cloak and daggers full cloak and daggers and you go what

and they go are you free to talk? And you're like, I am free to talk. They're like, this is fucking Peter from Queen's for the Children. I'm like, do I need to go in the garden? This is sick. This is so good. We're just looking for the second half of the money now.

All right, tell you what. I'll leave it under a car parked in an unmarked car in a car park north-northeast of Edinburgh Airport. The eagle has landed. The eagle has landed. The eagle has landed. So they posted it up today and then it was just like, I'm not necessarily a fucking impatient person,

but again, I'm like, well, the ring's there. I'm not waiting for a holiday. I'm not waiting for anything. So I might as well just do it today, but I knew we were doing this podcast today and I was going, when do I fucking propose? I was like, I can't do it tomorrow, on Friday, because we're doing a bar crawl.

And I'm not proposing to my girlfriend on one of our house bar crawls. As funny as that would be for one of the rooms to just be engagement party. Aye, aye, she thinks it's just a theme. Aye, aye. She doesn't know it's serious. Yeah, it would be funny, and she'd laugh,

and she'd still say yes. But she deserves a better proposal than that. So therefore on the Saturday, she's going to be hungover. I'm not going to propose to her when she's hungover. She'll be more vulnerable and more likely to say yes. And your anniversary coming up, which by the way, when do you count your anniversary from? First time you kissed, first time you met,

first time making her kiss, which is the same day. Or is it like when you changed your Facebook status speaking of which

giving you a history with Cara and Prest you haven't bought her

a fucking wedding ring have you just a better one like I did with a slush puppy

I got a real diamond face sorry I know this one did it was smuggled out in a 13 year old Ugandan boy's house

I didn't know you could get two straped diamonds but they were gone they were gone they were gone so oh yeah so the size of the ring

as well so when it arrived today I ran up I was like they fucked it they've absolutely fucking fucked it so I run upstairs

I go to her jewellery drawer I find all her rings I'm like oh no thank god they do all fit right so couldn't do it Saturday because she's been hungover. I'm not gonna propose her there. Sunday we're gonna fucking walk with Gareth and Laura every time. I'm not gonna fucking propose.

So did you have it in your pocket? What? Did you have it in your pocket when you were there? No, no, no. So no, we've got a walk this Sunday coming up. Oh, so it hasn't been like you're trying to find that right moment when you're out and about. No, no. This just got in today, right? So it's just sort of sped up because I was just like look when it arrives I'll fucking propose but I could also you know

it seems a bit faster to do it now but I can't do it next week and that's the main thing and the reason I can't do it next week is because

next week is Valentine's Day and it's not the new year anniversary it's on Valentine's Day yes and that would be the most muggle corner

holy trinity of muggle corners to get engaged on Valentine's Day, which is your anniversary. We'd have to get married in the corner. Like the whole ceremony would have to be, oh, it'd be fucking brutal. It would be absolutely, because she hates her anniversaries on Valentine's Day. The only reason her anniversary is on, we can sit down. The only reason I was is fucking April Fool's Day.

We've kept a couple, the 8th of September is our anniversary for marriage the fucking 9th of June is when we met but we went official that was when you said I love you because you got in the airport and you got in the airplane to Australia and that's why you said I love you

on April Fool's Day just in case you didn't say it back and you had a contingency plan I said I love you in the airport and I had no idea I was going to say it

that's when I was heading to Australia I had the exact same thing when I was in the show I felt like I played a prank

on myself I felt like I pulled my own chair from under the seat and I was like what are you doing what are you being

a dick for you were meant to tell her I told you that in confidence aye and then you winked after and then you

kissed your fingertips and placed it on her cheek save this for later remember people this exact fucking same thing with us

so we consider our anniversary the day I told her that I loved her which was on Valentine's Day in New York because I'd gone out to Australia

for Ella's wedding and then I started missing character it was just bad we were shagging and then I was like I miss this girl I have feelings for her

I was like so come to New York and let's just find out if we've still got feelings for each other while in New York and then like fucking after one day

I was like well alright this is, we were sat down on the couch just watching watching Harry Potter and I just had a whiskey, I'd like had a fucking smoke on earlier and I was just very content just sat there fucking watching the movie like with this vibe, I'm like this is

exactly what I thought of me, I get belly out I belly out, hand down my pants like Al Bundy, I'm like aye this is the fucking life. And I had no intention of fucking saying it, but I just... I fucking love you. I did die!

From an old man drunk. No, no, not like that. Not like she's my best mate in a pub at a foreign one. I fucking love you, man. But I turned around and I just went, I love you. And it caught me off guard, but it also caught her off guard because when you said I love you

to Natalie what did she do she said it back with a question mark go on do it so I can I'll be you I love you

oh I love you I love you bye enjoy Australia I guess I guess I love you She just said it

She said it back But She said Even if she didn't mean it She would have said it back Because she couldn't have Steeped in that awkwardness Yeah

It turns out she did mean it Ah yeah Thankfully She was like But I still would have said it Even if I didn't Put it this way If daddy had said

He loved me at the airport I also would have said it back to him So I know I'm not going to live in that awkwardness for any longer than I have to I'll say it get out of

there if I didn't mean it I just would never have contacted you yeah yeah look that would have been our final you would have seen that as a love actually moment and

that would have been our last moment together just all right why she changed her number when I told Clara I loved her did she do the

Japanese respect yes yes When I told Clara I loved her, I told her, right... Did she do the Japanese for Sparrow Girl? Yes! Yes! She did, right? So, I turned round to her and I go, I love you. And she went, eh! She instantly starts texting her pals. It was like a fucking, like like the most childish thing

I love you and I was like what she goes what did you say and I was like nothing she was like

say it again I'm like I'm not saying again if that's the fucking reaction I get she's like

say it again I'm like nah nah it took about two minutes to convince me to say it again and then she

said it back afterwards so she waited until you said it the next time well I guess to her she just didn't

think well I mean it caught her, she just didn't think, well, I mean, it caught her off guard. But you didn't have to simmer for a few days? No. You just made her sweat for a bit, good lad. No, no, she was just like, I love you too. And I was like, well, fucking, obviously.

Do you think I would have said it if I didn't know the answer? How long was it? Because, like I said, mine was just, like, a hiccup. Like, it just came up my mouth and I didn't even know it was coming, right? Like, how long had it, like, simmered in your thoughts before you said it? Did you have to dare yourself to say it? Yeah, it sat in my head for, like, I'd say a good month or two. Like, there was, like, when I'd gone to... Oh, I wasn't expecting that.

I thought it was going to be, like, in that moment. No, like, because I'd spent a lot of time trying to work. I was very confused as to whether I did love her or not because I didn't, to be honest with you, I wasn't sure what love was. You didn't have a therapist at the time. Aye, and also, fucking, my last girlfriend, when I thought I loved her, remember how that turned out?

I've got issues with my own brain when it comes to trust and love. So when I was out in Australia... You didn't have a word winning show out of it? Aye, well, look, it's it Aye well look You also broke up fucking 100,000 other people It had to be done So now you're going to do the fucking marriage show and start fucking getting out

Man that's the one bit I'm not looking forward to is like the amount of people who watched Jigsaw out of the corner of their fucking eye and didn't pay attention to a single fucking bit of it which is a lot of people who are now just going to be like hypocrite you said you hate love

and now you're a hypocrite I'm like you've not watched the show you've not watched a second of the show at no point is it anti-love it was about dumping my ex so that I could find this situation this is proof of the whole thing. I would have missed out on where I am now

if it wasn't for the fucking decision that I made back then. So you're helping people with them decisions? Oh, fuck, I need to message Rich Massara. Aye. Because fucking, I don't even remember, about two years ago. So just to nod to Rich Massara here, if you love the intro to this podcast, that is a handiwork of our good friend and just to nod Rich Massara here if you love the intro to this podcast

that is a handiwork of our good friend and joint lover Rich Massara Dick Massager himself such a handsome man anyway he

about two years ago for my Christmas bought me a jigsaw of my Netflix poster sort of thing

nice and I was doing such a thoughtful bastard isn't he oh no it gets way more thoughtful so I'm doing it you're such a thoughtful bastard aren't you oh no it gets way more thoughtful so I'm doing the fucking jigsaw I'm watching myself on Netflix

it's fucking it's just me I'm like this is fucking exciting there's a piece missing there's a fucking piece missing and I text him and I go

there's a piece missing your bass and he sends me a photo and he goes I'll give this to you when you find your missing jigsaw piece ah

so you you need to get that I fucking hope he's lost it I hope they couldn't move it so I'll have to I'll have to message that sex I'm going to get that back that's nice that leg

fucking good see you at the eye well so look now it's hard to tell depends who you are

so the plan for the proposal today now I got an idea on one thing and they did aye look I'm gonna

tell you this it's gonna be really gay right it's gonna be it's gonna be really gay today I'm gonna whip my cock out

no no because by that I mean it's fucking dead thoughtful and sweet what I've done. It's gay in the sense that a lot of thought went into it and it's, you know. Troy's going to be there. Aye. He is, isn't he? He is. So the plan is to go

on the walk that we normally do. So is he going to get a ghillie suit because Troy caught or captured Muff? Aye. So who else to hide with a ghillie suit on in the woods making bed prizes

aye he's the one that filmed Jigsaw and X and he's just a very he's one of the

best fucking DOPs in the world DOP director of photography right and he so the plan is he's going to leave like two minutes before we do,

and go the quick route to wherever it is, it's on a hill, so he's going to hide in the fucking bushes, which he's used to, he's got loads of experience. That's right, he keeps his porn mags. Aye,

and then I'm going to go up, do it, and so on the X tour, when I was like, when it was all, you remember all the long haul flights to America, like I went to America three times. Oh, when I was, like, when it was all, you remember all the long-haul flights to America, and, like, I went to America three times. Oh, that one where we had,

we seemed to have seven long-haul flights in the space of a week because we'd done the Far East and Australia back and back. Like, all those ones. So when I was, as you well know, as I always do on long-haul flights, getting blackout fucking drunk on planes and just watching movies and getting emotional, I'd always write Cara a love letter on it, because my dad always

used to write my mother love letters, because they met at Edinburgh University, but then during the summer holidays he'd be a backup in Thurso she'd be in his school, but my mother saved all the love letters You were sat next to me writing fucking love letters and I had no fucking idea You were asleep? You fucking

oh, the fucking ammunition the ammunition that was snicked of inches away from us and you fucking ignored it so I never

I was writing a fucking children's book next to you you were writing a fucking book about me I think oh no that was too

food for you that long haul tour I wrote a children's book which I've yet to see the light of day I wrote it over's book which I've yet to see the light of day I wrote it over a year ago aye

but you were writing fucking love letters I was writing love letters didn't post any of them so the plan is the plan is to go up and just be like just so you've got

and also there's letters from before we even were officially going out that I'd written I remember I wrote the first one I wrote on that flight to Australia mate sorry but fucking

when we get on Patreon you've got to read the moot on here no mate how are you how are you man no no no I'm begging you

I might not even let Cara read them I'll just hold them up in front because I don't know you got them here here's proof that I've loved you

for way longer than you ever thought I did and then mate I'd fucking I'd sell me Husky for these letters it's not happening. Cara.

Just like a paragraph. Cara, when you listen to the back, it's not... Just a couple of words. No, he's not getting them, Cara. They're for you and you only. Are they in this house? It's a big house. It's a big house, but Cara is going to wonder

what we're doing when we're running Scrappin' Round. Oh, mate. alright it's going to wonder what we're doing when we're running scrapping round oh mate so these little letters are bundled up like a fucking war veteran aye a bit like these are from your husband who died in the Somme

yeah lift up a floorboard take out the biscuit tin dust them off take off the old twine rope from around it you have grandfather used to give me these.

And then... Do you still write them and that? You've been on a flight in a while, I guess. No, I've not been on a flight in two years. I can't believe you did that. I guess that's meta love and kindness in it. That's what that is. Sending love out into the world.

I don't... Fucking brave that leg. I just think, look, you fucking want a primrose on an autumn's evening What the fuck's this pitch? Fucking primrose Well the reason I'm not Is that not what women

take for their menopause? In Game of Thrones books Aye well I've not any time I've wanted Wasn't that what you were doing sat there with a feather

A quill Aye feather Any time I've wanted to tell her I love her in the past year I've just told her You've done it with ink

We've done it there but it was just you know So you wrote these and never gave them to her No no never posted them You've done it when you're on your darkest of days I remember that was like Hong Kongish time wasn't it there but it was just you know so you wrote these never give them to her no no never post them you

tell it when you're on your darkest of days oh just i remember that was like hong kongish time wasn't it so i don't i think one's from there but it's over the years like this so there's one like when i was going yes you've been doing this sat next to me no you're not always on the flight so when i went over to australia mostly on the flight i wasn't doing it i mean this must confuse you a lot because normally when we're on flights together it's a flight

that's under five hours long so I'm asleep for the entire thing you mean so because one of the Australia trips last year

we didn't eat together as well and you did the New York trip I was out in New York for my show but that was just a small portion

of your New York trip so in that year you probably did have about a dozen flights that I wasn't on. Yes, aye. So I was on those ones. Thank God for that. I didn't think I'd be that unobservant in what you meant to handle it.

Are you in a postcard? Yeah, darling! You're a pansy. When you weren't in the vicinity Of my toxic masculinity I don't say aye Well No I mean I definitely wouldn't have

Like I definitely There's not Not a fucking chance All in business class All those ones So You've got these bundle of letters Aye

And you're going to take them Out in the rain later Going to take them out in the rain Well because Look I was talking to So I told My little mates Big Ali and Little Ali yesterday his bundle of letters and you're going to take them out in the rain later? Going to take them out in the rain. Well, because I look, I was talking to, so I told my other mates Big Ali and Little Ali yesterday

and Big Ali's reaction, because he's been with his girlfriend for 10 years now, right, and not proposed. I'm just like, just so you know, after tomorrow,

you're officially a cunt, right? Because your three best friends, me, other Ali, and Grey Grey, right, have all

now met girls got engaged in the past four years in the entire time that he's been with Megan so I'm like you're the last one and it's the longest

and if Gareth was listening to this I'm like in a fucking buzz there I can't afford a rake is that a Porsche you've just bought you're a fucking animal, Garth. A legend we respect. Takes a lot of fucking stores to buy a fucking Porsche

mid-pandemic eight years into a relationship. But like I was saying, he was obviously very excited. He's like, what are you going to do? What happens if she says no? And I was just like, God help the rest of the woman in the world. Because if she says no, it's not like... God help the rest of the women in the world. Because if she says no,

it's not like, Ed Byrne used to have a joke about it when he proposed to his girlfriend. How should I know if she says no, you break up? Aye. Aye, of course. If she's like,

I'm dead to spend the rest of my life with her. A no to this is a no to that future. So I might as well end this here and now. But I'm not going to handle it well. This is higher stakes. Aye. Aye, because it's not just your dignity to handle it well. This is higher stakes. Aye. Aye, because it's not just your dignity, it's actually the rest of your life.

Aye, fucking... Next will be a fucking flash in the panel turning into a monster after this. Oh, mate, there's no way you could do it. I got rejected. Fucking right, James, you can't do it. Mr Bean Shagged.

Fucking... Fucking... I can't, mate. I'm shagging to my mouth. You can't do that show, like. You can't do me fucking last tight end show. So, see you there, gang. It's all or nothing, baby. It's me at the edge of this cliff.

So, you're going to get out there you've got like how are you going to take this fucking bundle of notes you've got to put oh I suppose

I've got to wear a jacket and everything thankfully it's Scotland you're lucky in that respect that you can cover yourself you can like you can put notes there

I was in a fucking beach in Thailand with my shorts on fucking little tighties and all that you know what I mean and you walk over to Natalie she's like

you've got Prince Albert and honestly I had this fucking bulge in me pocket in the ring in the other one sorry I want the viewers

sorry listeners to understand I didn't laugh that hard at that shite joke but Kai made a face while doing that shite joke which caught me off guard

please don't assume that I was like this is top tier banner it was the very self aware face he gave while doing it it's the way you tell them it's the way you look

telling them so aye I had like I had a little reshot so I'm trying to like fucking hand him he probably like

whacked him like I'm cool as fuck aye but you were going to just like he could bottle it I couldn't I've got to go and run

out and eat with this thing in me pocket and I've got to the bar now I'm like turn side on to my leg whacking like

a crab but Matty would have had a field day he's got like a Matty next to him. There you go. Saved it. Saved. So aye,

you're going to have to... But I've like borrowed your jacket before to run to the car. Right. Fuck me. Is that like a medieval cape full of things? Like it's 17 pockets. There's a compass and it's got a fucking a mess of things like it's 17 pockets there's a compass

and it's got a fucking a mess tin like there's me backing and all that you've fucking you've just got are you going to sort your jacket or something

or I'll fumble and run like a mess is this something you haven't even considered yet I've not considered it to be honest with you I'm looking for the car keys because I've ran into the car

and I'm literally it's like unpacking aye well this is it's there so I'll just I mean the box is a bit big

I don't know why the box is that big you've got to keep it in the box also are you not a Hibs fan I am

because they open it up and it says Hearts Hearts of London oh so finally so it's not Celtic or Rangers got it with Premier League it's fucking Hearts they got relegated like fucking Hearts of London Oh so finally So it's not Celtic or Rangers Going to the Premier League It's fucking Hearts

They got relegated Like fuck it Hearts of London So I'll just keep it in my fucking pocket Or whatever And also You'll be able to wear a jacket

Worst case scenario If I lose it She doesn't know She's getting proposed to So Won't ruin her day So you're all going to get Doing your NAs

Fucking Make up like you're Looking for a contact lens Get a pack of So proposed to so won't run her day so you're all going to get to make up like you're looking for a contact lens so are you going to

give other notes before the ring aye slip them in the conversation

just sort of along the lines of just going look obviously I found

these in a pocket when I was cleaning out things these are all the love letters used to I was cleaning out a bag.

These are all the love letters used to write to you on airplanes. Are you recording this bit now, Leonard? No, no. Are you wearing a... No, no, no, no. Are you wearing a mic? Troy's just taking photos. He's not filming it.

He's just... Yeah, I'm not filming it. Fuck that. Insta? No. Troy's just down to take a couple of fucking you know candid nice shots no fuck filming it fuck those

fuck those people do you not do you not remember my favourite thing in the world to watch on YouTube is marriage proposal rejections aye

like I'm not I'm not doing my own thing you've got to get that to the can mate just in case no just in case it's not funny

when it happens to me it's not a good if she says yes recording it it happens to me It's not about if she says yes Recording it I think it is It's about if she battles her Send in to you for free Aye I get 200 quid Pay for that fake diamond

So Can I get a doona one day Aye Tell her what's what Can I get a doona one day Still knee? Aye. Tell her what's what. Can I get a do-no-one knee? Still be looking down on her. She's dating. She is a very, very dating person.

And you're going to say the words, will you marry me? What, as opposed to how about it? What do you reckon? What do you reckon? What do you reckon to this? What do you reckon? Size you for a quid.

That's a Ricketts thing. I'm afraid Ricketts will stand next to you at the bar. He'll look through and he'll have his cock in his hand and he'll go, I'll size you for a quid. Well, he does that with you. He doesn't do it to me, not since you lost that quid. No, he makes a lot of money off me. Every time I'm with him worried he pulls that one off

it's a quid and then and then if she says yes I mean she will say yes I know this is we're attempting to fucking fake him at this point

but if she says no she's fucking mental she's absolutely insane also I'll never trust again like if I've got if I've got because the thing the reason I love

the marriage proposal rejections right is because in each of the guy's speeches right he's always like I know it baby I know it's only been two months right

we've only hung out three times but when you know there's always a swing and a miss yeah you can tell from the I mean you can tell from the title of the YouTube compilation you're watching two months, right? We've only hung out three times, but when you know... There's always a swing and a miss. Yeah. You can tell from the... I mean, you can tell from the title of the YouTube compilation you're watching.

It's really implied. But you can tell by the demeanour. You can tell by the body language beforehand that she's like, oh, great, this is our fifth date and he's taking me to a baseball game. Maybe, I don't know. I'm in the middle of a mall.

Who wants to be promoted to in the shops? So you sort of hear these guys doing these fucking speeches and you go how can you be this unselfaware right

I think I am self-aware me and Cara are very open with each other all the time you know I've double checked

I mean we talk about our future very fucking openly oh yeah I've been in the room where I've been speculating hypothetical

so if she says no one she's fucking mental like who's right I'm sorry even if she says no one she's fucking mental like who's right I'm sorry even if she doesn't fancy me who's giving her a better

fucking life let's be real let's be fucking real and during a pandemic where's she going to find better than this she'd be fucking mental mate Colin

fuck I've been having an affair the whole time somebody knows why do you think he keeps laying eggs I just assumed because Easter was coming up

she keeps impregnating him that's how the dude on his planet if she passed I would yeah she says no I'll never trust again

and then but she won't I mean there's just yeah you're pretty safe and you know what if she does say no I'll always have this just... Yeah, you're pretty safe. And you know what? If she does say no, I'll always have this recording.

No, no, no, no, no. And I'll always have this smile on my face. No, no. That's just a permanent part of a workshop. Because if she says no, she'll disappear and this podcast needs deleted. This is my leverage.

Aye. This becomes... I tell you what, they'll be like, you just phoned up her parents later on today, not making the phone call expected to make to her parents later on. She'll be like, aye, aye, aye, aye.

No. Have you got any more, daughter? Oh, not that one. No, no. Any other ones? No, no. Just your one's gone missing. Yeah, yeah, no.

It's not been 24 hours yet. Well, that's the thing I want to ask as well. Do her parents know you're going to do this? No. Did you hedge them up? No. No? No. Got any respect them up? No. No? No.

You've got to need respect. No, it's not. I've got two answers to it. One's a cunty answer and one's my genuine answer. It's a rhetorical question when you ask them. Aye. Because the thing is, there's nothing... I'm going to marry the daughter.

You do like tradition. You do like ceremony and you like... But that's part of the... You do like symbolism in that. Like the fucking Scottish thistle means the world. There's things. There is. I get that.

But I do like some traditions. But that's one of the ones that just doesn't fucking make sense. I think mine was getting on the knee. It didn't... Like, that didn't make sense to me. That to me was going to do something that drew attention to a situation. Because we're at a big restaurant. And it drew attention to a situation.

And I'd be foolish to think Natalie wanted that kind of attention in a restaurant. Aye, aye. So, like, she was pleased I didn't. Aye. And we could have a private moment rather than making it a public moment. As you can in the wilderness. Aye, just up there on the fucking, on the hill. What was the point I was about to make?

The point you were going to make is you didn't want to run it past her parents. Well, just because, for two reasons. One, I love her parents and I know her parents love me like we get on like a fucking house on fire they know how happy uh we make each other and you know we're very uh she's very close with our parents i'm close with mine so we just sort of know we find and then also just my dad you know i take after my dad my my two uncles asked my granddad for his permission because my granddad's an old school. My granddad loves the tradition because he's from that generation.

My dad did not ask my granddad. And he doesn't get it. He's just like, there's nothing he could have said. He's like, it doesn't matter. He's like, I'm going to marry your fucking daughter. That's the be all and end all of it. It's not your decision.

It's her decision. If she says no, so fucking be it. But I'm not, it doesn't matter what you say, right? It doesn't matter what anyone else in the world says. I'm going to it but I'm not it doesn't matter what you say right it doesn't matter what anyone else in the world says I'm going to and I'm sort of in

so how would you feel about if like you and Cara had a daughter and little Linda was going to get married and they didn't ask and Kev didn't ring Kev didn't ring you

no I wouldn't care nah no no because I would because I would just got us off the pole I think at that point

I'd be in what I hope a similar position what her dad's in which is look if you make my daughter happy like if you clearly make

my daughter happy I don't care like I imagine it's you're not doing it out of the blue it's not a fucking surprise they've been together

it's an obvious thing but no but also my daughter's not on my property. Why is he asking me? If she wants to marry you, she'll marry you. I think by the time my daughter's getting proposed to, I don't get to have that sort of influence.

You know, you're not asking permission, you're asking approval. Like, you don't need permission. There's no object element to it. It's like, do you approve of me doing this? Well, I've also... It was totally assumed with mine I would get approval, which made the question as easy as asking Natalie.

Well, for me, I want to... I know we've got the approval. Her mum and dad want us to have kids now, so I'm like, there's no way you just want her knocked up like he definitely want this in the future but also

I don't want to take away I want her to tell her parents yeah like I and I want her to have that moment with her parents where she gets to

whether we you know fucking just face it where she gets to get their genuine reaction not that when she phones them

that they've got these knowing eyes, like, oh my God, it's going to fucking happen. Yeah, I guess there's two good sides to it, because there's that. That is a genuine thing, but it's also a good genuine thing to put them in the position that I'm in now,

where now that it's going to happen, I've got this sense of anticipation, I'm going to spend the day waiting, and then when I find out, I feel like I've been part of it. Aye. So it's like you can give them, to give them been part of it aye so it's like you can give them

like to give them one element of it you have to take away the other aye so I think there's no wrong answer

aye if you like and it's not again I love her parents and they love me and I don't think it's

if I thought if I thought her dad was one of those men that was like about you know old school fucking respect he's not he's sound

like he just loves his daughters as long as they're happy so do you want me to tell Natalie what's happening when I get home or do you want to tell her have you not told her when I told you I didn't think it'd come up I've heads there up that it's imminent I've heads there up that it's imminent and that

but like I didn't really know any timeline to give her any more information than that so it will still come as a slight surprise when I... She'll just be dead excited. Aye, aye, just because I think, I mean sorry I should have put this is a bad, but I'm going to have to cancel my stream tonight. Like I'm going to stream tonight. Like, I'm obviously... Are you going to stream? Are you going to tell them? Are you going to tell them? Give them a pre-emptive, like... Wait, pre-emptive. They're going to hear this after the fact.

I'll just... Tell them you're sick. Tell them you've got COVID. No, because then it'll hit the tabloids immediately. That'll be the Scottish Tom Hanks people will be so worried about me no I think I'm just going to be like oh sorry we can't tonight

just something fucking came up and then I'll not be able to explain to everyone until next week but I think we're going to let this come out on Monday morning before you

let the public know and then I think I'll let these fucking all faithful let them find out through the podcast ah the OGs and then just obviously for the fucking rest of the night we'll just be fucking I imagine

facetiming people and telling them that's a nice part of it as well like we want them but it's a day fucking earlier today right so Cara had to go to the shops because she's finally been seen by a dermatologist

she was just out to get all her meds that they're going to give her to sort out her fucking rashy arms and also like

fucking Ray had diarrhoea but that stuck to her fucking arsehole hair and the only way she could get it off

was by wiping her arse across her fucking floor system unfortunately across the floor the only way she could wipe the cat's arse her arse across her fucking floor this morning unfortunately across the floor aye the only way she could wipe the cat's arse

was dragging it across the floor no no Ray dragged her own arse across the floor no she loves that cat what kind of cycle

does she just use tissue no no so Ray had been dragging her arse like a dog aye aye so that we just

get down to thankfully because the underfloor heating worked, it kept the shit warm so it didn't solidify. Unfortunately, the room stank for a fucking fair bit. Oh my God. And you were like, on this day. Well, so Cara's like, I'm going out to the shop,

do we need anything? And I'm like, eh, you pick up some bubbly. And she's like, for what? And I was like, just for the bar crawl tomorrow. Not for your room. Aye, I've got to need it for the thing. And she's like, why, what's going on in your room? I'm like, just for the bar crawl tomorrow. Like, I've got to... I've got to need it for the thing. She's like, why? What's going on in your room?

I'm like, stop fucking asking questions, you cunt. Like, all right, all right. Well, I'm just doing a short game where I want some of them to be classy things. She's like, oh, well, we can maybe just pick up. Like, I thought we'd go to the shops later on today. I bet after the walk, we just walked to the thing. I'm like, oh, yeah.

Are you making her buy the bubbles? Aye, I forgot to, yes. I was busy. You knew I was coming. To be fair, I did text you. Did you? I did text you, but you were already on your way. I just texted saying, are you on your way?

And then you didn't reply. Oh, right. I haven't looked at my phone since I got here. Aye. So, aye, you've got the bubbles. Aye. No. I haven't.

No. So, no, no but also like her best friend Jill who's been helping me through all of this oh you know what for what time of the day it is you can just swing to the shop

and get bubbles on the way back aye you can just tie it into your walk but also like Jill Cara's mate Jill who's been a fucking god

said through all of this Jill who I always meet when I'm absolutely mashed usually high yeah and then go we've never met before I'm Kai

I've heard all about you and she's like Kai we've met loads you're always cunted and you always say this exactly this is my shtick so

Jill's been my fucking spy during all this so I was just like right because I don't know ring sizes I'm like

Jill I need you to certainly find out Cara's ring sizes for me and all these things so obviously she's known for a bit so she knows it today

so she's I think she's like going to like drop off a care package at our door while I'm out doing it

so maybe she's provided the bubbles otherwise I'll just fucking I saw the best tweet ever I don't know

who to attribute it to but it was about the founder of their fiancé's ring size by sucking

their finger and keeping their lips pursed like that as they walk to the shop isn't that one of our

dad jokes I don't know is it oh well maybe I thought I thought I'd seen it as a tweet it could well be I'm pretty sure

that's one of our dad jokes before or maybe it's maybe I'm misremembering maybe it is we're very funny boys so today's maybe it is we're very funny boys so today's celebration

is getting in touch with the family and all that the weekend it'll probably have worn off a little bit the novelty of it because we're making

each other speed nagging nagging at each other and then I'm supposing because yeah you're making the promise now but you're probably

going to wait until everything's back up and running aye yeah yeah yeah we're not going to have any like rushed COVID

wedding on our hands no no like I I mean obviously we've not fucking we've spoken about our wedding in fucking vague terms about the future

but now it's obviously going to start being a bit more concrete thing but this conversation later tonight will be the first time we've ever actually gone alright

when do we want to do it and I'm fucking opening with I'm going to be like look fucking 23 or 24 like it's got to be that this has to be well and truly over

and also I'd like to have money again I need to I need to have worked for a fucking bet to be able to you know because I don't necessarily want a big extravagant

fucking wedding like no I do yeah well then that's the thing you're in the same situation as me where I want I would have like

wanted all the extravagances I would like I wouldn't have been asked about spending my last penny on it whereas Natalie would want to make the money

stretch and get as much bang for her buck as she possibly can and she's like she made us have this fucking glorious like overseas wedding aye and it was exceptional bang for her book as she possibly can. And she's like, she made us have this fucking glorious overseas wedding.

And it was exceptional. On a nice enough budget, on an affordable budget and all that, right? Whereas if it was left to me, I would have probably spent twice as much, had it at home and it wouldn't have been as good. Like, she's just better with money and I think you and Cara would be the same, whereas you would just go, yeah,

sure, that one, whatever, that one. Whereas I think Cara would be the same whereas you would just go yeah sure that one whatever that one whereas I think Cara would be a lot more meticulous with it aye she'll rein you in if you start getting too fucking

oh and then we're going to have to have fucking diamonds in the champagne fake ones mate it's not fake it's a real diamond the only difference

aye aye alright sure look it's just cruelty free alright sure look it's just cruelty free it's a vegan diamond it is yep

vegan diamonds and man way fucking cheaper but man I'm really glad that the she's a lucky gal I'm really glad

that the jeweller did not fucking recognise me at all because like you know he was like how would you want it I'm like straight up cheapest chips mate mainly glad the jeweler did not fucking recognise me at all because like you know he was like

how would you want it I'm like straight up cheapest chips mate mainly no it's not cheapest chips I'm like look I want

I don't want a fucking one of these inexplicably expensive diamonds because it's come from some part of the fucking world and you've got

a little certificate that says it's from there I don't care if it's made in the UK and it's a well made diamond and it's to the fucking kind

and have you got any brass aye you got any brass? Aye. You've got any brass and just like, you've got like those silver fucking sharpies, the one that just goes over the top. She wouldn't know. She wouldn't know. She doesn't shower that much.

Silver sharpie. Just kind of, you know, the metallic ones. Just give it that sheen. Just give it a wee spit shine. But I was just going, he was like, what's your budget? And I was was I went low because man we're in the middle

of a fucking pandemic and also if I genuinely one of the beddy raisers is why I love it if I spent a lot of money on the ring she would be genuinely

fucking furious because to her it's not about the ring at all the ring is very much the symbol of the promise for fuck whatever it could be I could genuinely

borrow a ring for 50 quid and she would be happy with that yeah my logic was i want to spend as much as i can without her getting mad yes and that's exactly what you've got to hit you've got to hit that like that sweet spot and then look within that budget of like it's not too cheap that i feel like i'm short changing her and it's not too expensive that she's going to be like but we could have had other things i wish she's like she's like i'm, do you think you have to buy my love? Like, when have I ever given that sort of impression

that I'm this type of, you know? Yeah, which actually keeps me on my toes that we've got, like, girls that don't need the grand gestures. Aye. Aye. And we are not the same, because I'm like, buy me a PlayStation 5 whenever you can. Grand gesture.

If you want to cover these Tesla repairs you fucking go I've been like fucking just shaking my head at the stuff Natalie puts ahead of a PlayStation 5

when you're looking at the price of like the kitchen table but that's the and you put a PlayStation 5 on that

I've spoken about that already I feel like I've said that before it's just that thing I get when I'm like have I just said this in conversation to someone or have I said it on the podcast and now I'm ear fucking them twice I don't know if I've mentioned this but

you know when we got the keys to the house so you get the keys to the house and then you go in and the rest of the keys are in the house you've moved house before this was our situation I don't know if this is the always situation when we get there

the bloke who ran back doing the drive I'd never met him before because when we checked the house it was his wife and then he comes and went

I left a drill in a box in the house can I just run in and get it and he had a key and I think the fuck's this are we getting burgled I don't want to get in the house

he runs with the back he had a key for the back door and he was like oh thank god I come back and caught you because I had to give you this right fucking good save

right nice save but you kept the key to be fucking hoosemade and I mean I didn't want to slack these people off because they've been great

like we had a couple of problems when we moved in like one with the boiler and one with the like leaking underneath the sink was leaking couldn't just got them

fixed straight away on his ticket like he didn't make it our problem so he comes in but then he leaves that key

in the door picks up the keys he's left behind and opens the door and went do you want us to show you around like the electric boxes

and the stop cock and all that and we're waiting for him to leave so that we can have the ceremony and moving in but then when he said

do you want us to show you around I'm like well this is fucking vital because I'm going to be searching around this house for like you know the stopcock for turning the water off or say if like your radiator comes off the wall for some inexplicable reason aye let's say

a giant moron ripped it out for no reason and then that leaves us like we'll just look at each other like yeah yeah sure and she won't in you know how you're going to carry your partner across the threshold I come in from behind

like a rugby try like a lay note like a rugby lay note picking her up by the thighs banged her head off the roof banged her head

off the roof just because I thought I'm not that superstitious but it's got to be done but in that moment I was like I kind of want

to carry her over the threshold tradition thing going on it was ungraceful I'm not that superstitious, but... Aye, it's got to be done. But in that moment, I was like, ah, I kind of want the carrying over, the threshold, tradition thing going on. It was ungraceful. Right, let's do some of your dad jokes and then I've got to go do something. Yeah,

aye, but I was wondering why you were like, hurry up, get here for one. And then just when you were having your lunch, I was like, let's go and do the podcast. You were like,

are you on a time limit? And I was like,'s go and do the podcast you were like are you on a time limit and I was like kind of a little bit I fucking hell forgot about that because didn't I

do that with Brett Vincent when he was about to propose he had everyone on stage for the group photo for Altitude

and it was like all like he booked it with all of his best mates so the whole fucking line up was just all of us

lot and then there was like the celebrities there were like was it like John Bishop and Eddie Izzard and stuff

this perfect Kodak moment like these fucking star studded friends of his around him and he's going to get down on one knee

and when the camera was there I was like oh we're doing Fight for Cian at the time I was like oh can we do

Hearts Out for Cian photo with everybody and I gate crashed I didn't know who was going to propose I gate crashed

his proposal with the heart out. For Gareth Bale. So anyway, I've just stolen the podcast to fuck it up for you longer. Your dad fingers his arsehole every morning because it stops him biting his nails. Your dad goes by the nickname Pickle.

And he chose it himself. Your dad brushes his the nickname Pickle and he chose it himself. Your dad brushes his teeth at lunchtime because his breath smells like shit. Don't think his plan worked. Your dad wears high heels because he likes to keep himself on his toes. Fuck you. I knew it.

Fuck you. That's the response I was looking for. Your dad wears his Fitbit to bed so he can record how far he travelled running away from all of his demons. Your dad wipes his bum with a knife and fork. A spoon would be so much better, Martin. What are you doing?

Mate, he's a nightmare. Your dad has spent most of his adult life trying to breed the ultimate pet, doing mate he's a nightmare your dad has spent most of his adult life trying to breed the ultimate pet but all he's done is got a cease and desist letter from the RSPC

and glued two cats to a dog in an otter your dad got arrested for selling livestock on eBay wait you're not selling livestock on eBay

I'm just fucking putting it on a dad mask through the glass Wait, you're not allowed to slap a fucking knee, mate? I'm just fucking amazed. Got to visit your dad and ask him. Tack him through the glass. Touch his hand through it. It moves you so much. Your dad drinks wine from a bowl like soup.

Thanks for the wine glasses, by the way. Oh, yeah. I broke them in. I didn't break them. I didn't break them. The housewarming gift was lovely. I enjoyed them I usually use a bowl like my dad

your dad didn't realise I was in the bath when he got in and had a shower and he still has no idea I was there just him standing over you in your rubber ducky so you got anything to plug in 10 years time? look I didn't do it I don't know where she's buried

This idea that I had anything to do with her disappearance This whole podcast was a bit Yeah, it was just a bit It was actually on the morning of whatever fucking date it is today Should I remember it? No, she'll remember it 4th of February Woke up, Cara said she was going for a walk alone

It was nothing unusual And I've not seen her since. But if you listen to this on Monday there, 8th of February, then it went well. And should we record a podcast on Monday anyway and release it later on Monday and have like a double bill episode

of like how it went? Sure. He sounds excited, guys. He sounds fucking excited. If there's another podcast in a few minutes after this got released, then that's what happened. You're going to have to do an intro, but, like, don't give anything away.

Right, okay. Keep a straight face. Right, be subtle. Aye, like, don't give it away in the intro. I can do that. Right, bye. Bye.