Small Town Murder - #31 - A Monster More Than Once in Woodside, South Australia

Episode Date: August 16, 2017

This week, we check out the down under town of Woodside, South Australia for the tale of a monster that just kept getting let out of his cage, no matter how terrible his acts. Along the way, we find out just how angry Australia's version of Captain Kangaroo was, how a train can really spruce up a town, and just how horrible you can be, and still get out of prison in less than 15 years!!Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie WhismanNew episodes every Thursday!!Please subscribe, rate, and review!Listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to podcasts!Head to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things Small Town Murder!For merchandise: crimeinsports.threadless.comCheck out James and Jimmie's other show: Crime in Sports Follow us on social media!Facebook: facebook.com/smalltownpodInstagram: instagram.com/smalltownmurderTwitter: twitter.com/MurderSmall Contact the show: [e-mail] See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You're listening early and ad-free on Wondery Plus. What if you married the love of your life and then stood by them as they developed 21 new identities? What would you do? This Is Actually Happening is a weekly podcast that features extraordinary true stories of life-changing events told by the people who lived them. Listen to the newest season of This Is Actually Happening on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. This week, we check out the down-under town of Woodside, South Australia, where someone proves themselves to be a monster, then does it again. Welcome to Small Town Murder.

Hello, everybody. Welcome back to Small Town Murder. Oh, Jimmy, your yay is so on target this week. My name is James Petrigallo. I'm here with my co-host. I'm Jimmy Wissman. God, we are so excited. This is great.

This is terrific. So many new listeners. So many of you new people on board. Thanks for listening, guys. Thank you. Stuck with us since the beginning. Thank you guys for your iTunes reviews this week. Holy hell. I'm telling you guys, the business of podcasting, that's kind of how you're measured.

It really helps a lot. That's what they look at in the charts. They look at if people will take that 30 seconds it takes to sign in and do that. Will they say something nice about you? Will they say anything? Do they have the drive for you to do it? So really, they just mean everything to us. They mean the world to us.

So if you have not done it yet, please, please get on iTunes. Give us five stars. We don't care what you say. Don't give a shit. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter to me. We don't need some big love letter. No.

No, it doesn't matter. Just say, talk about your most attractive Martha or whatever you got to do. It doesn't matter. But if that's not enough for you, too, I really, really want to thank the Patreon supporters this week and the people on PayPal. So nice of you. You guys have been amazing because this show, honestly, has grown in listenership immensely. And we've had an amazing amount of iTunes reviews and all this that kind of puts us in a good category, in a good area with a lot of big people. But we, outside of you guys, we really have not made a fucking dime off the show.

That's a fact. Yeah, it's true. Oh, we sold some T-shirts, but with international shipping, we really— It's kind of a wash. We really didn't make that. That was mainly to get you guys T-shirts because you wanted them. We really didn't make anything on that, and it was more just a lot of work. But still, so thank you guys. And we're not saying that you guys need didn't make anything on that. It was more just a lot of work. But still, it's so

thank you guys. And we're not saying that you guys need to pony up. That's not what we're saying here. We're thanking you. We're just saying thank you. That you guys have made it so this is worthwhile and worth me not sleeping for the last three days. No doubt. So let's do this here. This is so fun. If you have not done it yet, please go to

patreon.com slash crime and sports. If you feel like making a donation, you can do that there. Lots of cool rewards for you. If you just want to do a one-time donation, if you just want to say, hey, guys, I'm going to throw you a few bucks right now, you can go to PayPal and do that. Our address there is crimeandsports at gmail.com. Right. That is crimeinsports at gmail.com.

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But without further ado, we're going to get to this, but we have to do our disclaimer first. All of our new listeners out there, if you're an old listener, you've heard this before, but try to make it a little entertaining for you. But yeah, this is a comedy podcast. It is. Facts are real. Murders are real. Everything that goes on that we discuss is real.

We don't make things up for the purpose of humor. But we are stand-up comedians. So there are jokes being made. If it's funny, we're going to make fun of it. That's it. We're going to make fun of the town because everybody's from a town that deserves to. There's not a location on earth that doesn't deserve to be made fun of.

Not one. That's true. We make fun of bumbling police forces. We make fun of murderers because they're murderers. Because they deserve it. That's it. Who cares? You shouldn't be defending us making fun of someone who killed somebody.

So that's fine. We do all of that. But we never, ever, ever make any jokes at the expense of the victims or the victims' families. We try hard not to do that. We try to be respectful to that because, like we've said, like has become our motto, we are assholes, but we are not scumbags. And that's the way it works, guys. That's the thing.

If that sounds good, you want some murder, we will shut up and give you murder. We will shut up and give you murder. If you think that true crime and comedy should never cross paths, then this probably isn't the podcast for you. You're probably not going to enjoy it. And thanks for trying us out. We wish you a fond farewell. Bye.

Have a good one. Don't let the door hit you. Everybody that's left, shut up and give me murder, baby. Let's do this. Because we have it. Let's head. Let's head. We've been in the U.S. for a while.

Way too long. We did Canada. We did the U.K. Lately, we've been in Georgia. We've been in Arkansas. So much of the South. That's a lot of U.S. right there. That's hardcore U.S. action right there when you're talking about those. Shoving it right up your ass.

Oh, man. Yeah. We've had some very distinctly American crimes and some American locales. Let's head somewhere far away. Let's head. This has been our most requested place to go. We have a lot of listeners over here, and you guys have said, please, please do Australia. So we are going to be in Australia here. Let's head. This has been our most requested place to go. Yeah. We have a lot of listeners over here, and you guys have said, please, please do Australia. Yes.

So we are going to be in Australia here. Let's do this. So now you can visit Australia minus the 29-hour plane flight. Yes. We're going to do this. We'll take you on a little tour of what's going on here in Woodside, South Australia. All right. All right. Let's do this. Australia has states, I guess you could call them. There's seven of them. Yeah, there's six on the mainland. We have Queensland, which has Brisbane in it. New South Wales, which is where Sydney is.

That's the big one. Victoria, which is Melbourne. Northern Territory, which is kangaroos. Yeah, and nothing else. The skeletons of guys that tried to be Paul Hogan, I assume, just rotting in the outback. That's what I would imagine. And fellas practicing some rugby. It would be like in Goonies when they find one-eyed Willie.

That's a bunch of guys with a crocodile dundee hat and a big knife on them. And they're like, we tried. I was going to be a star. It didn't work out so well. Also, Western Australia, which is where Perth is. And man, that is out there, too. Perth is like Honolulu or something in American terms. It's like way out there on the other side.

They only live on the coast. Well, yeah, because the middle is desert. That's the reason, right? The middle is desert. And it's a funny thing that like, and we're saying this, we understand the irony of what we're saying here sitting in Phoenix, Arizona. Talking about a desert. But it seems odd that a group, I get it for the strategy of it, the strategic nature. If you want to take over all of Southeast Asia and enslave their people, you've got to get somewhere near there and really get a base of operations.

Plenty of land. Plenty of land. But it seems odd that pasty, pasty English people would go that far out of their way to go around the world to sit on a desert. It's the weirdest shit I've ever heard of, and I don't understand it, and that's why I'm fascinated with Australia. I love it. Mind you, obviously they didn't know that the ozone layer that was depleting

where that giant hole was, they did not know exactly where that was because it's directly over there. Yeah, it's like an ant with a magnifying glass. They have notifications on the news there that tells them how long they can be in the sun. Well, they do that here, too. Do they?

Yeah, they'll give you the UV index. How about that? And that tells you how long a fair-skinned person will take to burn in the sun. Sometimes it's like three minutes. That's why I have these moles on my head. Yeah, exactly, Jimmy. Pay attention to the damn weather. But yeah, it's hot there, too.

It's a hot little place there. Also, too, I haven't even finished this, South Australia, which is Adelaide, which is where we are. We are outside of Adelaide, as a matter of fact. 37 kilometers or 23 miles from Adelaide, which is the state capital, but it's not a big town. Adelaide has less than 20,000 people there. So for a state capital, it's not a huge town. It's a suburb of a small city, basically. It's a suburb of a small city, basically.

So it's a kind of a – from everything I saw from Woodside, it looks like a very small, towny Main Street, USA, or Main Street, AUS in this case. That's what it looks like to me. That's what I can see. Also, too, they have Tasmania, which is not on the mainland and sounds like a disease. Where the devils are from. Yes, and it's – mania. That sounds like a problem. You know what I mean? It's like whatever mania,

WrestleMania, Tasmania. It's very strange. I learned about them from the devils, though, from fucking Warner Brothers. Well, yeah. That's how I learned about that place. They taught us everything. So, yeah, I guess you stay off of there

because I think those are the people there, not even an animal. That's just how the people are. I'm not sure. I've never been down there, so excuse me. I've Googled it. It's a scary-looking creature.

By the way, all of this, we do ask, and we did this with our British episode also. Canada, you guys are attached to us. We know enough. But please, we ask that you find our ignorance charming. That's what we ask. We know we know shit, and we're not claiming to know everything. We do as much as we can, but I cannot possibly, for an episode of something about murder, figure out the entire history and economic and social everything of Australia.

It's just fucking impossible. So we're sticking with one town, doing that town here, and that is Woodside. Like we've said, postal code 5244. Isn't that weird? A little short on their postal codes there. Less people. I learned that sending out fucking shirts. I'm like, where's the rest of your numbers?

Where's the rest of your number, guy? This doesn't make any sense. What are you doing? So it's a small town in terms of area, 1.65 kilometers, so not a large town, not huge. I guess there was a family that kind of started this town or started doing things there and started making it a thing. It's a lot like America

Australia in terms of when we did the British episode, we were like, this house in his neighborhood is from 1605 and shit like that. Things are old. Everything here is sort of newish. Everything's new, written record and everything like that. When Europeans

landed there, they landed late, just like in the US. So it's kind of newer history in a lot of this. The Johnston family of nearby Oak Bank founded the town in the 1850s to improve their brewery business. It was a traffic hub linking Oak Bank, Lobethal, and Charleston. The original hipsters. The original hipsters, yeah.

They were micro-brewing. They had a really nice IPA in 1856. It was pretty good. Aboriginal hipsters. That's what it was. In 1860, they had a really nice Abe Lincoln IPA. It was pretty good. Aboriginal hipsters. That's what it was. In 1860, they had a really nice Abe Lincoln IPA. It was like underground. Nobody really knew about it.

I like what you're doing with the underground. It was pretty cool. You know what I'm saying there. Thank you. They were seeking outlets for brewery products, so they had the town of Woodside laid out. They would go back and forth with horses and that sort of thing. They had the Woodside Inn they opened, which is now the Woodside Hotel. They changed a lot of it, and they would go back and forth with horses and that sort of thing. They had the Woodside Inn they opened, which is now the Woodside Hotel.

They changed a lot of it, but they tried to keep a lot of the historic Woodside things, I guess, there to try to keep like a little town center. It has like a little main street. You know what I mean? It's like a nice little main street in the town. It looks like a nice little town to raise your family. It doesn't look too shabby at all. They should have figured out how to genetically modify kangaroos there to use them as a mode of transportation.

I mean, I realize that they're mean as shit. You'd have to train them, domesticate kangaroos. Wouldn't it be great to ride in a pouch to work? That would be fucking amazing. I feel like it would hurt their pouch. I don't know. Maybe just on their back if they're hopping. Genetically modify them to where it's like a baby Bjorn. It's like a horse.

It seems fantastic. Like a backwards horse, I guess. Yeah, that doesn't seem like a bad idea. It seems like a cradle. You could read a book in there. They'd be fucking pissed. It's probably slimy in there, too. Yeah, probably. It's probably got some sort of mucus.

It's really a little stinky, yeah. There's probably some sort of mucus in there. I feel like you're going to come out. You're not going to be ready for work when you come out of there. It's like, take me home to work. I think that's a brilliant idea, though. They should try that if they can get them to fucking make them nice. How about robotic kangaroos? Yeah, there we go.

Now it's easier. At that point, just get in the car, I guess. How about cars? Let's just drive. So we've gone from genetically engineered kangaroos to just fucking left cars. Just abandon the whole shit. Yeah, what the fuck? So, yeah, they

still have a bunch of old buildings there. The St. Mark's Church, the Uniting Church, all these towns, it's always churches that go up first. They have a hotel that's been open since 1857 that they're trying to do. The railway line came through from 1918 to 1953. That's very exciting. Oh, that

was just the beer going through there. The kangaroos trying to keep up with businessmen in their pouches. How many of those fucking kangaroos got hit by a train? Yeah, no shit. Because those things are all over the road down there. Well, it sucks if you're late for work and you're like, shit, I missed the train. Then you're like, I got to catch the next kangaroo.

And then it's like, fuck, now I'm going to be slimy. This is a mess. The huge thing in this town is the chocolate factory. Oh. Oh, my God. The Willy Wonka. That's it. No, it's town is the Chocolate Factory. Oh. Oh, my God. The Willy Wonka. That's it. No, it's the Melba Chocolate Factory.

And it is the- I believe I've heard of that. They are all about the Chocolate Factory. On the town's website, it's like, come see our Chocolate Factory. That's what they're saying. Here's a town with a Chocolate Factory. That's huge for that. July 1st.

It's funny, because Santa Claus Georgia a couple weeks ago, all they wanted was a candy factory. It's all they needed. And apparently it works. That's all we need is to make this town thrive. Apparently that works. It's funny because Santa Claus Georgia a couple weeks ago, all they wanted was a candy factory. It's all they needed. Apparently it works. That's all we need is to make this town thrive. Apparently that works. It does. Because it's working here. A little brewery and a fucking candy factory.

It's happening. It's happening. It'll make the town thrive. 1990. This company, Melba, started in 1981 out of their house. And they got bigger and bigger until finally July 1st, 1990. They transferred their operations to the historic Woodside Farmers Union factory site, which had been closed since 1977. So it was a cheese factory, this was.

It's like Wisconsin here. Yeah, it's fucking bizarre. There's cheese and there's chocolate factories. Yeah, chocolate factories. Domino worked at one. This is the only way we know about culture is where a serial killer worked in this place. I know nothing about Milwaukee. I was thinking that I heard of this.

You're thinking of the toast, I believe. Yes, you are. I knew you were going there. God, I'm fucking stupid. I was waiting for you to come out with it, too. And I'm like, I'm going to let him stew on this for a minute. I am so dumb. Unbelievable, man.

So Melba, the factory here, they have, it's kind of like an old-timey, hipstery type of establishment. They have confectionery-making machinery that's – but they use like old-timey machinery too so people can come and watch. This is what Santa Claus Georgia needed. Take notes. This is it. Take notes here. Santa Claus. Turn yourself into a southern fucking Milwaukee.

That's it. At this point, their main local businesses are Woodside Cheese Rights, which they're cheese, a Melba's Chocolate Factory, and a bakery, and a winery. So you go there, that's cheese, bread, wine, and then chocolate later. Sounds fantastic. You are set.

Fuck a sunburn. I'm in. It's sweet. We're going to go into the people and what everybody makes and all that. Just so you know, one Australian dollar is equal to 79 cents, which means our money is worth more than Australian money. I've learned that. Yes, that's the Canadian episode. That was a point of contention. There are approximately, there's about 1,842 people in Woodside.

That is the 1,842, so not a lot. It's a pretty small town. Pretty much the same,842, so not a lot. It's a pretty small town. Pretty much the same. Pretty normal. It's funny, too, because their stats I'm looking at are very similar to U.S. stats in terms of everything. The equal number of male and females, which is just an Earth thing. But median age is 36. The average here is 37.

They don't break it down into so much ethnicity down there in their stats. They mainly break it up into country of birth. Yeah. So if you're born in Australia, you're just Australian. Right. Whereas here, that's not how they do it, obviously. So 75 point or 76.5 percent of the people living in Woodside were born in Australia. Seventy five percent.

Seventy five percent native Australians. Five percent English. Four point one percent Iran. Two point nine percent Sri Lanka. Well, 5% English, 4.1% Iran, 2.9% Sri Lanka. Well, they're close down there. It's not that far. 1% Iraq, because they also take refugees also in Australia. 1%, as we know from recent

goings on. 1% Gaza Strip, a little bit from the West Bank. So these are this is refugee country here. Some New Zealand, some Scottish, all that. We're under a percent there. 85% of the people speak, all that. We're under a percent there. 85% of the people speak English. So that's something that they have there, speak English only because they're pretty white. Kind of. Yeah, kind of.

It's a weird English, but it's English. And they're English, yes. Sorry, Australia. We love you. It's a great accent, though. Holy shit. I do love it. They're such fun son of a bitches.

I love Australians. Religious, not that religious there. Almost 30% say no religion at all. 20% didn't even state it. And then the other ones are like the calmer ones, uniting church, things like that. 10% Catholic, 9% Lutheran, only 1% Baptist and that sort of thing. No Jewish people from what I could find. I wouldn't guess. Yeah, I don't know how many there are in Australia. It's hard to travel from New York there. Get yourself some Jewish people from what I could find. I wouldn't guess so. Yeah, I don't know how many there are in Australia. It's hard to travel from New York there.

Get yourself some Jewish people, guys. You'll have less violence. 50.6% of the people are married, like we said. It's pretty much the same thing as here. It's a 50-50 break in the marriage. Their unemployment rate there is only 3%. Really? That's pretty good.

That's great. That's basically nothing. That's nothing. That's somebody who can't find their way in the door to fill out an application. 3% is absolutely pretty much zero. That's getting into the point of like it's a weird economic thing, but that's like it gets to the point where it's dangerous to have that low of unemployment. It's a weird thing. Going back to the religion part, in Australia, atheism is on a huge rise.

Yeah, everywhere in the world it is, except Muslim countries and here. Except for Alabama and Mississippi. Except for the South and Syria. That's it. Those are the places where, yeah. Everywhere else, it's like they're just like, listen, there's too much violence based on that shit. Let's just forget about it.

So the median household income there is about around $50,000 a year, which in the U.S. it's $53,000 is your average median income. So, yeah, the median rent there is around $1,000 per month. That's great. Which is fine. Median mortgage payments, about $1,500 a month. So that's how they have it there. If we've convinced you. In a town of 1,800 and it's that kind of price, that's fantastic.

No, it's good. It's a nice town. It's a clean town. You look at this town, it looks like a nice, clean, this looks like you'd go, wow, that's a family town right there. They're going to have a nice parade one of these days, I have a feeling. Not based on Jesus. No, it won't be based on Jesus

down there. It'll be based on like a Wallaby and Paul Hogan will be their two main, I believe. They don't need religion because they have Paul Hogan, I believe. Yeah, I'll pray to him all day. That's how ignorant we are. But I'm sorry. You really pushed him out there.

You guys were like, fucking, that's cool. You rammed him and his fucking knife down our throat. When it made Australia cool, you were like, yeah, no, that's us. We're all just like that. And then after it was not cool anymore, you're like, hey, listen to me now. Yeah, listen. Yeah, it's not us. No, it's all a goddamn theme restaurant all based on a stupid steak and lobster.

So if we've convinced you to move there, of course. If you're here in the U.S., you're moving to the other side of the world. Maybe you're in Sydney. Maybe you're in Perth. You're going to move to the other side of Australia. We have the Woodside, South Australia Real Estate Report. All right. All right.

We have a four-bedroom, three-bath house here. It's on 13 Perrin Street, if you know where that is. This is weird. Some of these houses don't have a set price. They have a range. This house is $595,000 to $619,000. What? I don't know.

Somewhere in there. Somewhere in there. I don't know why. That's a good market price. I don't know if they're that honest down there. They're like, we'll take anything in there, really. And the people are like, okay. And they negotiate fairly. I don't know why. That's a good market price. I don't know if they're that honest down there, but they're like, we'll take anything in there, really. And people are like, okay, and they negotiate fairly. I don't understand. They're not trying to rip each other off.

Their housing market is like the Kelly Blue Book. It pretty much is. And I saw a lot of houses like that, too. Like, half the houses were that listing. I found a four-bedroom, two-bath house for $416,000. And then I found a nice little starter home here. Three-bedroom, one-bath, nice stone outside, real nice yard, $349,000.

So not too bad for a nice little town where you can have a job, apparently only 3% unemployment. Seems like a nice thing to do, nice place to have a family. Things to do here, obviously the Chocolate Factory is their number one thing to do. It started 20 years ago. It's a, quote, working tourism factory is their number one thing to do. It started 20 years ago. It's a, quote, working tourism factory, they call it. You can see guided tours, and you can buy the shit that they make. They also have a woodturner, a puzzleman, a glassblower. What?

A puzzleman. A puzzleman. I guess it's a guy who makes puzzles, I assume, because they also have a woodturner, a glassblower, a jeweler, a potter. I think these are like old-timey crafts. This is crazy. I think a puzzleman makes puzzles. That would be – I don't know how he makes puzzles. What the fuck else would he do?

So he makes puzzles. If not, I'm puzzled. I have no fucking idea. Ah, geez. No idea. Also, too, riding instruction. You can – I don't know if you ride a donkey or maybe a kangaroo. I'm not sure.

A roof. But they're offering scenic Aussie bush rides through there. So that's good stuff there. I'm going. Crime. We're our main focus here. The crime rates, very hard to find out of country crime rates. They have them for the whole region, and I found them for Adelaide, but I couldn't find

them for specifically Woodside. I found it for towns around there. Either way, very light on crime. This seems to be like Adelaide for, you know, a city of 20,000. It's a small, small city, but they had very little crime there. Nobody's got a gun to do it. You know what I mean? No.

And the other thing is, too, looking around, looking around at everything, their main complaints with crime were like, you know, we got to work. We got to get this graffiti under control. That's awesome. There's been more graffiti. And it's not like, you know, everybody's getting raped like it is here, where they'd be like, good God, somebody move that dumpster because four people have been raped there this morning.

Just move it away. Somebody move the dumpster. You know what I mean? If there's a behind the dumpster, someone will get raped there. That's how it is in America. That's very much like our system. That's there. Whereas as here, they're really worried about graffiti in the u.s we only worry about graffiti if the graffiti says that someone's going to die specifically then we're like that's

a problem and even then we're like yeah they're just fucking around okay so it seems to be very light on crime uh like i said property crime seems to be i don't know about where it is as compared to normal but it doesn't seem to be a huge deal and violent crime seems to be, I don't know about where it is as compared to normal, but it doesn't seem to be a huge deal. And violent crime seems to be very, very low in this area. They seem to get along nicely. And generally, as we found in our two other countries we've been in, besides this one, people do not kill each other at the same rate they do here and other places. It's so bizarre, isn't it?

It's just bizarre. How do we foster that kind of behavior? I don't know, but we've done it. We've fucked it up. We've figured it the fuck out. That's for sure. We've fucked it up. We've figured it the fuck out. That's for sure. We've fucked it all up. And let's find out about a guy who has just fucked it up so bad for so long.

Who adopted American culture. Oh, this guy. Yes. Here is your Australian American here. He's not from America, but he acts like an American. You guys adopt him. He watched a lot of MTV. I would say so.

It's James Beauregard Smith. Oh, boy. He sounds fancy. He sounds like a Southern officer, doesn't he? Like an officer in the Confederate Army. Like a fancy one, though. With a white suit with some gold shit with tassels on the shoulders. He went to the military institute.

And he's very, his father was an officer and he's an officer. But he's not. He's actually pretty much like Australia's version of white trash is what I would most like. Australian turd. I like this. I don't know if you guys have white trash down there, but that's kind of what he is. So if you don't have that down there, start throwing that around because I'm sure you've got plenty of it. Start calling him white trash.

I'm sure there's plenty of it out. Just look in the desert, I would say. That's probably where to start, where the meth labs are. I saw a documentary one time, by the way. Quick side note here in Australia. It was an outback town. It was called Cunnamulla, and it was the most depressing fucking thing I've ever seen.

It was literally where the railroad ended. Really? Like they showed in the town, like the kids went to look at it. There's where the railroad ends. That's the end of the trek. The board with all the slats and wood and the crosses on it. It's just, there it is. It's over. That's it. It's it. The railroad tracks just stopped. That's it.

That's it. The train comes through here. It's going to be a mess. They sat around in the heat with no air conditioning. Oh, God. Watching like American VHS tapes from 10 years before that they just got there. Like it was the saddest thing I've ever seen in my life. They just got night shift.

Yeah, exactly. This was an extreme middle of nowhere like case. But like this is what we're talking about. I feel like this guy would have fit in in that town. He's born in 1943, Mr. Smith here. That's Beauregard. He adds that later on. Really?

At the trial? Yeah, it's James George Smith at this point. He sounds like an asshole. He watched some old TV in America. That's what happened. Yes. Let's talk about how much of an asshole he is. He's 34 years old in 1977. Pretty much has a shit life. Minor run-ins with the law, later described in court documents. I just love the way they put it. Quote, a number of convictions, mainly for offenses of dishonesty. So I don't know what that means, but I wouldn't

believe shit that he says is what they're getting at here. He doesn't seem like a great guy. He's a bricklayer, which doesn't make him a bad guy at all. But he's a bricklayer. He's a blue-collar guy. At one point, he said to a coworker, just as an aside, he just said, it's easy to get away with murder. Jesus. Somebody remembers him saying that. So it's one of those things where he's just like, that's what he talks about at the job site.

What do you do if you're laying bricks next to a guy and he just outs that shit after? You have to lay down a little, put it on there, stick one on there, get it all smoothed out. And he's like, it's easy to get away with murder. You're like, oh, OK. I'd like to lay bricks with somebody else. Can I not be next? I think I'm on lunch now. I think I have a sandwich with my name on it here.

So this James George Smith, as he's known then, he's, like I said, just seems like a complete mess. All sorts of different problems. He arrives in Adelaide from the interstate. He drives on in. And he, in 1976, okay, drives into Adelaide. And he's in the area there because this is in the suburbs of Adelaide. He places a Lonely Hearts advertisement. Uh-oh.

So this is in the 70s. There was no Tinder. Right. You know what I mean? This was you had to actually. God, what a long way to go. Yeah, you actually had to put an ad out in a magazine here. How about that?

Like, you got a boner. You need sex, and you actually have to write down words and then give it to somebody and then wait for that shit to be published. I was going to say, well, you have to wait for it to be published. Then you're going to wait around a week with a boner? Never mind mailing. Then you have to wait for them to mail you a

response and wait for that to be sent. The whole process is insane. It's like a month with a boner. It's insane. That's why you really got to get, I think, a roster going, I think, with what this guy was trying to do and what a lot of these people would try to do back then, like what people do now online. They just build up this roster of people. A ton of right swipes. Yeah, it's really weird.

He puts this advertisement in the advertiser, and it simply states, quote, 33-year-old guy wants to start a new life in SA, South Australia. So, you know, very simple. He's like, I'm not going to oversell myself. That's what it is. I'm not going to say I'm handsome. I'm not going to say I'm rich. I'm just, you know what? I put the minimum out there.

Just car. That's what he put in. Car for sale. 2011 car. And he went, what kind of car is it? How much does it cost? Well, I'm curious. You got to come by to see it.

Now you're hooked, baby. Now you're hooked. That's what he's trying to do. He just said, dick to ride. Here it is. Should have went into marketing rather than bricklaying, but he didn't. Several women answered him, too. Really?

Not just one. I mean, there was a few women. I don't know. That was the way to go about it. He's a marketing genius, this guy. Among the women that respond is a woman named Sandra Holland. Sandra Holland has three children. She is she has two sons, Scott and Craig, who are 11 and nine and then a younger daughter,

who I believe is five at this time. And this woman with kids is answering personal ads. She had just recently been apart from her husband. They're not fully divorced, but they're going through the process of getting divorced. And so she's, you she's trying to put her life back together. And they don't have, like we said, there's no match.com here. This is it. You look in the paper

and you go, that seems like a decent one sentence ad for a guy. I guess I'll bring him around my kids. And you have no choice back then. Everybody had to do it. That's just what there was, I guess. And if you're in a small town too, what are you going to do? Once you've met everyone in town, then what? Like, that's it.

I don't know. And none of these people are to my liking. I searched all over this town. You're the one for me is the only thing you've got there. You can't, what else are you going to do? So Smith and Sandra Holland, they become close in 1976 right away. They're, they're together the last half of 76. I spends, he spends tons of time around

her and her sons and her daughter and just kind of becoming, they're all becoming one big unit here. Apparently, as this goes on into 1977, in early 1977, James starts becoming really, really just controlling,

infatuated, and downright just overbearing with her, constantly starting fights with her about where she's been, what she's doing. He's one of these guys. He's not – I don't know what it is, a lack of confidence or whatever the psychological reason is, or if he's just a psychopath, as we'll find out later on, that's possible also. Not to put a blanket on him. That is a medical term that several people use.

So we'll keep going here. But she kept going through. She stayed with him for some reason. And like we said, I don't know her level of confidence. And these people are looking for singles ads back then. They're lonely people in a small town. So I don't fault them for trying to find companionship.

When you snatch one up, you gotta try to hang on to them. Exactly. But you do that too much and they run away. Calm the fuck down. You do that too much it ends up being July 12, 1977 and she said, I have had enough of this shit and I'm not taking it anymore. Good for her. They've been together almost a year and she just doesn't want to take it anymore. He does not want to split up. He wants to be together forever, the whole deal.

Talks to a friend of hers that night about the whole situation and says that she told Smith to quote, don't bring me up again. I don't want you around anymore. So don't call me. Leave me the fuck alone. Back then, that's all you could do. Don't text me. Don't bring me up anymore.

Don't bring me up anymore. Don't do it in the morning either because that'll be knocking you up if you wake them up in the morning. Terrific. Yeah, that would be, I don't know if you have to specifically knock on the door to knock someone up or if it's just waking you up, you knocked them up. I'm not sure. Hit us up with that.

I'm sure you will on social media. We understand. And I apologize for any mispronunciations as well. I'm pretty sure Woodside is Woodside. If you say it's not, go fuck yourself, because it's Wood and Side together. Eat shit. It's definitely Woodside. It's goddamn Woodside.

So, anyway. Don't ring me up about it. No. So the night of July 12th, this is all going on. She's told him, I don't want you around anymore. Don't talk to me anymore. He ends up, Smith ends up at Sandra's apartment back at her house. And they have a huge argument again.

She says, the thought is that she says she's going to go back to her husband or something like that to try to get rid of him. Just to go, I'm going to go back to my husband with the kids and I can't be with you anymore or whatever. That's kind of an easy way out, I would think, where he's trying to just get away from this crazy asshole. But you don't tell a crazy guy if there's another man. You know what I mean? No, no, no. That's the other thing, too. That's tough.

That's touchy. She should just be able to say, don't call me anymore, and he should just leave her alone in a perfect world. That's the other point. In a perfect world. Guys should be able just to take rejection. Go away if you're told to go away. Yeah. Someone you met out of the paper.

Do you think it's going to last forever? I mean, what are you doing? That's a good point. She's dumped you. Go away. Yeah. You have- This equivalent of meeting her on Craigslist.

It's going to go away. What's the ad cost? 50 cents a month to run? He's still got it running, I'm sure. You've got a notebook full of them. He's getting responses. Yeah. So on this day, they have a huge argument, like we said.

She says she doesn't want to see him again. She's going back to her husband. He says no. We're being together. Anyway, this escalates to the point of him hitting her. He hits her, and she falls down unconscious. Come back. So now there's an unconscious woman here that he just hit after an escalated argument.

So shit, now what do you do? Run away. I've honestly never hit a woman. Run the fuck away. I don't know what you do at that point. Do you help her up, maybe? Do you see if she's okay? Do you call the ambulance?

I don't know what you do at that point. Hold a mirror under her nose. If it fogs up, you go the fuck away. Wow, that's a very sensitive way to put that, Jimmy. I'm just saying. I guess if you're a scumbag that just knocked a woman unconscious with a blow, I guess that's probably what you would do. That's what I mean. I'm trying to put myself in panic. I'm just thinking, oh, what have I done? He said, well, she's already unconscious. I better strangle. Oh, my God.

Why don't I just strangle her and get it over with since she's not going to struggle? She's unconscious. No, that was the wrong answer. If it was family feud and I said top five answers are on the board, that's not top five answers. I'm positive my answer is not even there. No, I would hope not. But this is definitely not there. This is at least worse. They asked one sicko and that was their answer.

So he strangles her and he's finishing strangling her to death. And who runs into the room? Her nine-year-old son, Craig. Obviously a little distraught at this whole situation. Yeah, why is Mommy blue? Why are you choking Mommy on the floor? So he freaks out a little. James grabs Craig and takes him back into the bathroom where he was originally,

where he and his 11-year-old brother, Scott, were taking a bath. I guess she threw them in the bath and said, fucking wash each other. I'm going to argue with this dickhead. I'm going to tell this guy. I'm going to get rid of him. I'll be back in a minute. Your hair better have conditioner by the time I get back. Exactly what it is.

Yeah. You use soap. Yeah. You use soap. Under your armpits, goddammit. And neither of you shit in this tub. I swear to God, if I have to clean another turd out of here. I have to fish another shit out of here.

We're going to have a fight. So there is a strangled woman. Let's get back to that. So there's a strangled woman. And she's, poor Sandra, is on the a strangled woman. Let's get back to that. So there's a strangled woman. She's poor. Sandra is on the floor strangled. And so he takes Craig back in there where Scott's having a bath. And what do you do?

Get them dressed. Tell them, Mommy's sick. I need to take you to grandma's house. No, he says, let me drown them both in the bathtub. Oh, my God. And these aren't infants. This is a nine-year-old and an 11-year-old. These are big kids.

This is a struggle. You haveold and an 11-year-old. These are big kids. This is a struggle. You have to really want it to drown kids. I have a 10-year-old son. He can push off the tub in a second. Jesus Christ, yeah. If I wanted to drown him, I'd have to bring a lunch, man. It's going to be a fight. I've never thought about it.

But at this point, yeah. I'm pretty sure I'd have to sit on my kid. Probably. I don't know if that's what he had to do. We really shouldn't be speculating on how we would kill our young children. But this is insane. So now he has drowned two children.

Unbelievable. This utter and complete piece of fucking garbage has drowned two children after he strangled their mother, all because she just didn't want to see him anymore. She didn't do anything horrible to him. She didn't steal his life savings. She didn't do any, not that any of that's reason to do this. She rejected a man and this is

his response to it. She rejects a man who has an ad in the paper. Like I said, it's not like, oh, he was an introvert and he never met anybody and this is the first person he ever met. This is an ad in the paper. What the fuck are we doing? Lunatics. So this doesn't obviously look premeditated or

anything like that. I don't think he went there with the intention of killing her. I think he went there with the intention of conning her and talking her into whatever bullshit he wanted to do. And it didn't quite work out that way. He's less savvy with marketing face-to-face than he is from just a little quick note. You know what I mean? He couldn't sell forever to her, so he just choked her out. No, that's – well, it was. He punched her first and knocked her unconscious, which is even – He couldn't sell forever to her, so he choked her out. No, that's – well, it was. Unbelievable.

He punched her first and knocked her unconscious, which is even – this is horrible. So at that point, he said, now what do I do? Now I have dead children and a dead woman. I got to try to cover this up a little bit here. Yeah, what do I do? So he steals two of the televisions in the house because, you know, why not, I guess. So you get rid of bodies. Yeah, that's what you do. When I want to get rid of bodies. Yeah, that's what you do.

When I want to get rid of bodies, I steal televisions. Also, there's another issue here. If we recall, she has three kids. Yeah, there's a little girl. She has three kids. She has a five-year-old daughter who isn't aware of any of this shit going on in the house. She's still in the house? She's in the house.

Oh, my God. He's got three dead people, two stolen TVs, and now a five-year-old. She's watching Wobbzy. Yeah TVs, and now a five-year-old. She's watching Wawa Wubbzy. Yeah, she didn't see him do anything. She didn't see him. Captain Kangaroo, I'm sure. Captain Kangaroo. Plus, it's Australian.

It's Australian, Jimmy. It's Captain Kangaroo. It's got to be Captain Kangaroo. They have a real Australian Captain Kangaroo. It's a kangaroo dressed like a captain. That's what it is. It's Crocodile Dundee type guy, shit-faced. Shit-faced with a beer in his hand.

I fuck that pussy. I fuck that pussy in America. He's a kangaroo. That's very Irish of you. He's drunk. I don't know. I can't do an Australian very well, and I just realized that a drunk Australian is even harder to do, and I don't have that in my repertoire. I don't have that.

I don't have it in my quiver. Drunk Australians are Irish. That's pretty much what it is. I reached for that arrow and I was like, I don't have shit. I better. Wow. This is terrible. I got nothing.

So this. You actually made the motion of going for the quiver. I did. It was gone, man. I went there. I don't have that at all. Wow. I've never had that.

It's the drunkard story that sounds Irish that just goes, I'm a fucking kangaroo. He's mad at the American Captain Kangaroo for being a pussy, I feel like. I feel like he's just like. Calling him a fat bloke. His kids, children, this is a pussy. It's just kind of grunts. It hurts so much. it's just kind of grunts and it hurts so much he's just too drunk oh okay back to let's go back to horrible murder okay we're way off the reservation horrible things are happening i'm picturing just

mick dundee just ripping him apart yeah just mad but hammered mad at captain kangaroo so pissed he's a pedophile you know just ripping him apart. Yeah, just mad, but hammered, mad at Captain Kangaroo. So pissed. He's a pedophile, you know? I hear he fucks kids. Oh, my God. Oh, that hurt. So, yeah, so there's a five-year-old girl who now has no mother and no brothers

and has no idea about any of this. So what he did was he was renting an apartment on West Street in Hectorville, which is near there. And what he did is he had there was two girls staying there. And I don't know how this worked, but there was two girls, a 16 year old and a 17 year old that worked there that lived there. I don't know if that's his place, if he was renting it out to his plate, renting it out, subletting it to them, or I don't know what the hell is going on.

So this is where he takes the two television sets and all the other shit that he stole from her apartment. He takes them. He takes all this stuff to his flat here and he tells the teenagers that live there that he found them in a house at the end of a dirt road. That was his explanation. Like, that makes it okay. I figured since it's at the end of a dirt road, you could just steal all the shit.

It's just my stuff now. It's open season. You know better than to put your house at the end of a dirt road. That means just open season time for anybody who wants to come there. So he's still got the little girl. He keeps her for a night. And then the next morning, he brings the daughter to the flat and asks the girls to look after her. He took her. Yeah. Who knows what he said but he's

like yeah you watch this kid for me for a while I guess they knew he had a girlfriend. He probably said this is my girlfriend's kid we have to do something. Would you guys mind watching her for a little while? Put that drunk Captain Kangaroo on one of those TVs I stole. It's fine. I got two TVs. Line them up. You can put the American one on and the Australian one on the other side and it'll be like they're fighting.

Kids will love it. They love that shit. It's going to be perfect. The next day, he takes the girl, this poor little girl, to another woman. Another woman. What is he doing? Who he met from the ads. Oh, God.

Another woman. This is not an attractive man, by the way, I got to tell you. So this is a manipulative son of a bitch. He figured out how to get somebody to just watch a random ass kid? A woman named Rosalind Stein, who he met through the Lonely Hearts advertisement. She really, really liked him. She would later state that she loved him and wanted to marry him. Oh, boy.

So he's so upset that this woman doesn't want to see him anymore, Sandra Holland. But he's got other women. He's got one on the hook that wants to marry him. Who want to marry him. So this is what I mean. This guy is just, it's all about control and not about anything else. If I can't have you, nobody can. That's apparently what it is. So yeah, they said

that he just leaves this little girl here and you know, walks away. So she doesn't know what to do about it. She ends up phoning police after a while who come and get the girl and then do a little investigation on who she

is and everything. And then they start going, well, where the hell are your mother and brothers? They go to the house. They're not at the house. They can't find them at all. Oh, boy. Yeah. Why that is is because he tried to conceal them.

Really? Big time. He wrapped each of the body in a bed sheet. All the bodies, wrapped them in bed sheets, and then used electrical. They call it electrical flex. I don't know if that's like a bungee cord, I'm assuming, or something like that. Electrical flex. It might just be like flex tape.

Either way, something to bind things with. And he bound up both ends of the bed sheet with each of these bodies. Okay. What he also did, this is ridiculous here. The home he had in Hectorville, that we've discussed here was next door to what they call a derelict house which i think is great just i guess it's a great word an abandoned shithole so he takes the nine-year-old craig and hides him under the floorboards of a abandoned shithole derelict nice nice work asshole poor nine-year-old kid that's where he decides to i

mean there's just no respect at all here for anything, life or death or anything from this asshole. That just proves it, that you have no remorse, no anything. Nothing. Then he takes Sandra and Scott, the 11-year-old and Sandra, out to like a dump site in Woodside and puts them under a pile of vegetation that's set to be burned. Just trash. That's set to be burned. Right. That's what he did. He found a pile of stuff that they're going to burn and he said, let me bury them under a pile of vegetation that's set to be burned. Just trash. That's set to be burned. Right. That's what he did.

He found a pile of stuff that they're going to burn. And he said, let me bury them under them. And then when they burn them, we'll just burn the bodies too. So that's his plan here. And he separated the bodies too. Like, that's crazy that he put it like a board. That's so sad. He put one under there, two under there, I guess, to make it look.

Every turn in this case so far, I have not been able to put myself in his mind. In a lot of these cases, I'm like, okay, he's probably thinking this. Or we kind of go, okay, what's he thinking? He's probably thinking this. This is just fucking bananas. It's like he knocks her out. What does he do? All strangler.

Why would you do that? He did this. Why would you do that? He takes the little girl. What's he going to do with her? Well, obviously, take her to some other lady's house. Obviously, dump her off everywhere. Everything he does is like the exact opposite

thing, including he takes Sandra's car off to another town and sets it on fire. Jesus. In his mind, this is to throw detectives off the scent, but you're drawing attention to a burning car. You're lighting a legit flare. We did a crime in sports where somebody did this

and killed a woman, put him in the trunk and lit it on fire and he was like, that should try to cover it up. It was in the middle of the desert. It's like people showed up in five minutes from 30 miles away. You could see a giant fire in the middle of the desert, you jackass. So he lights it on fire. Before he sets it on fire, though, he removes the wheels, the windows and the motor. That takes a lot of fucking work.

This is what I'm talking about. Jesus. He removes everything that has VIN numbers on it and shit like that. The windows, the motor, the wheels, all that kind of shit. And then sets the frame on fire. I don't understand what he's doing. After this, this is in the two days after that. The next day

he dropped the girl off. He did all this shit. After that, we find him two days later. He's out drinking. Hanging out. Just hanging. That's all done now. Shit. that's behind me. He's exhausted. He could use a beer now. Man, boy, I'm going to have a beer and hope that Australian Captain Kangaroo comes on TV because he's entertaining.

And I'm going to hang out here at the Glind Hotel when a detective approaches him. As he's approached, he runs away, which is a bad sign. He's quickly caught, though, obviously. He's interviewed for seven hours. And they said, well, where's Sandra then? And he said, I think she's gone to Luxton. L-O-X-T-O-N. Luxton.

I think she's gone to Luxton, he says. Where the fuck do I know where he's... Where else do people go? Luxton, always, right? Why do you have her daughter then, asshole? She took the 6 a.m. kangaroo to Loxton, I feel like. That's what she did there. Wow.

So he said that he suspected, Smith said he suspected Sandra may have had another man in her life. But she also said, you know, you might want to check with that because, you know, I don't know if maybe she ran away with somebody or if maybe that person did something to her. But, you know, I don't think anything's wrong. She's fine. He said, quote, you wait. She'll turn up and so will the kids. You bet they will. That's what he told the cops.

And then when they kept pressuring him, his quote was, quote, I'm no frigging murderer. So you can't even use it. Go the distance. You're accused of murder. Say fuck. All right, please. You're accused of murder. Let's not be cutesy here.

That's a weird way to, I'm no murderer. I'm no frigging murderer over here. You know what I mean? Shit turn up. Don't worry. Shitesy here. That's a weird way to... I'm no murderer, though. I'm no friggin' murderer over here. Shit turn up. Don't worry. Yeah, shit turn up. Don't worry about it. You wait. She and the kids turn up. So do the kids. Don't worry about it. Everything's fine. I know murderers. I know people, and those turn up. Let me just tell you that. One thing I know about people,

they turn up. They turn up most of the time. So, you know, shockingly enough, they're not buying this at all. The police, the detectives, they're like, you know what?ingly enough, they're not buying this at all, the police, the detectives. They're like, you know what, we're a little skeptical of your story here. None of them thought that, obviously, that Sandra would just abandon her daughter, just her daughter, to a stranger. Here, lady, you take my daughter. I'm going to take my two sons for some reason, and we're going to go away.

Also, yeah, we're going to go away and burn my car. That makes a lot of sense. That's what most people do. They take two of their kids, set their car on fire, and then come back from vacation afterwards. That's how I start my vacations. I don't take all my kids and I set my car on fire and I'm like, now I can relax. Now I can relax. This is perfect.

Yeah. Just in case I left the stove on, I'll just burn this preemptively. Just to make sure that this goes away. Exactly. I don't want this to burn in the fire. I'll burn it in my. I'll just burn this preemptively, just to make sure that this goes away. Exactly. I don't want this to burn in the fire. I'll burn it in my own. What the fuck? So he's the suspect.

So they're focusing on him, and they're focusing all around him. And finally here, a few days later, Craig Holland's body is found underneath the floorboards of the house, right next door to his house. So he couldn't even have gone two down. On the same day, they find her burnt-out car at the dump with the bodies that they found also. They unwrap the body. They unwrap Craig's body later on. Autopsies would show he had bruising on the left side of his face and neck that are consistent with being held underwater, smashed against the tub floor while he drowned.

It's ridiculous, man. They didn't even find Sandra and Scott for several weeks after this. So they were underneath vegetation shit to be burned. So that's a compost pile, basically. It's so hot in there. It's horrible. They're decomposing. It's just the worst, man. It's just the most disrespectful shit this asshole could have done here.

Yeah, they were searching forever. There was hundreds of volunteers searching for them because they had found the young boy. And they found it, too, because this was in August for the next month. A highway department worker was getting ready to set fire to the pile of trees and pile of vegetation and noticed a foot sticking out. Wow. And that's how they found it. They didn't even push it all under there. It was Sandra's foot.

Yeah. Well, who knows? Maybe some wind came or whatever. He still, once they find the bodies, he dropped the daughter off. We know that. All of these things that we know for a fact that happened, he's still denying it. Really? They found the kid's body next door to his house, buried in the floorboards.

He drops kids off. He has her stolen property. What a weird place to put it. All of this shit, but I don't know anything about it. Somebody clearly is framing me. I'm no frigging murderer. You know what I mean? What are we doing here?

So the trial begins in February 78. Weird little thing in Australian law back then. He was charged with a single count of murder, and that was Craig Holland. But the jury was asked to consider if he had murdered all three. It's weird. He's charged with one. I don't understand how this works in the 70s in Australia and your laws. That's a crazy thing to do.

It's super weird. That's ballsy on the part of the prosecution. What if he gets off on that? I think it's just, like we said before, I think it's just everybody believes each other. It's like anywhere between this much and this much and we'll pay that. I think it's one of those things. Anywhere between one and three counts of murder. Yeah, well, if you think it's one, then we'll say it's three.

But, you know, we'll work it out. Like, everybody, everyone's honest here. It's fine. Also, they found just tons of evidence against him. He had his footprints were found at the derelict house next to his house that matched his work boots. They found a chip of wood in his Ford Falcon. He's driving around a Ford Falcon, by the way. Poor guy.

Which matched a missing piece. Fuck him. He deserves a Ford Falcon. Which matched a missing piece in the floorboards of the abandoned home. Oh, wow. So he got someone a shoe and got it in there. Great fucking police work. That's good police work for the 70s, especially here.

They found a blood stain on his jeans. They got one of those Puzzlemen from the fucking chocolate factory and had him go find where that thing fits. Yeah, that's the Puzzleman. Finally, we know why the Puzzleman's there. The Puzzleman puts wood pieces back in fucking planks. Oh, the town Puzzleman's a hero. He's a hero, the town Puzzleman. They come to him with that.

Maybe he's like the wise man of the town. What do we do? Well, let's take it to the Puzzleman and They come to him with that. Maybe he's like the wise man of the town. What do we do? Well, let's take it to the puzzleman and maybe he knows. The puzzleman knows. So also, too, they found a blood stain on his jeans that was not his. No DNA back then, obviously, so you're not going to be able to find out exactly whose it is. But it's not his blood type, so definitely not his. And they found a fingerprint of his on a glass from a broken piece of plate at Sandra Holland's house.

Uh-oh. So, I mean, with that, he's been there before. But the bloodstain is more problematic and the wood and all that sort of thing. That wood is fucking huge. I think they have the most, between the wood and the footprints and that being next door to his house, they have the most proof of Craig. So I think that's why they're just charging with Craig and they go, you know. Also, too, when you're considering, there two more, a couple more bodies over there.

There's two more. Yeah. Other items, too. They found that he stole from the Holland's home were found like a block north of his house, like in a vacant lot. He just tossed them. Like, let me just throw this shit out. I don't need this. They'll never they'll never connect it to me. I put it a block away. Right. Wow. So prosecutors say that, you know, the prosecution says that they that he flew into a rage and murdered everybody after she said they were, you know, she was and she was ending the relationship. He reads a he reads a statement, Smith, saying that he loved Miss. He loved Sandra and he'd been, quote, worried, sick about her and her boys. Just a complete he says, quote, I just wish to say I had no reason to want to kill Sandra or the boys. I wanted to marry her.

I was very fond of her children. When I advertised to meet a woman for companionship and friendship, I put in the advertisement that I wanted one with children. So I could drown them in a fucking bathtub. Yeah, thanks. And leave one an orphan. Appreciate it. Well, she's got a father still, I guess.

But Jesus, no mother, which that's. I'm so sick to death for that little girl. That's horrible, man. It's the worst, man. We also, too, they find his old co-worker that said that he told him it's easy to get away with murder. Smith's lawyers are just arguing there's not, quote, not a scrap

of real evidence against their client. They have a six-week trial, the whole deal, and they finally end up convicting him of the murder of Craig Holland. He would later plead guilty to murders of Sandra and Scott. I guess it's kind of a trump card, like we got you here, so you might as well plead here. They find him guilty, like we said. The judge sentences him to imprisonment for life is the case there.

But at this point, and we'll get into this in a moment here. I like I said, sentenced to life in prison at the time of this conviction. The law there did not provide for a non parole period. OK. So there was like, you know, now it'll be like, oh, you're 40 years, 20, no parole. So you're only eligible after 20. There was no non parole period then. So you could sentence for life, but you could let somebody out in five years. That's what I mean. So it was very, they didn't do it

a lot. And they are so nice to people. Yeah, they probably, let's give them another chance. What do you say? They have very few serving life there. Yeah, that's the thing. So either way, he is, he's convicted now, life in prison. He's hanging out. You think he's, you know, away. 1982, he is in prison. He's part of the fire brigade in prison. He's putting out fires of the riots.

It's super weird. Yeah, it's very strange, but they would be – they were like a fire brigade. They'd go like a volunteer fire service. They'd go out and put out fires and shit. They would let convicted murderers just go hang out. They killed somebody three people five years ago, and then they're out putting out fires in public. It's super weird. In public?

Like out of the prison walls? Oh, yeah. They're out there. There's another guy who'd shot and killed 10 members of his family a couple years earlier. He was also a member of this. Holy shit. Clifford Bartholomew. So it's absolutely ridiculous.

You've got to knock this shit off. August 82, this prison firefighting unit are granted a day release to take part in a display at Riverton. No. Yeah. Smith offered another inmate $8,000 to help him set up an escape, but he never came through with the payment, of course. Because he's got no money. He's a complete shyster. What he ended up doing is just wandering away. Wow.

That's it. Of course. Just wandering away. Yeah. That's it. From the group and he's just gone. Yeah. They said, where'd Smith go?

And he was gone. So they had a giant manhunt for him. Dozens of police officers. And they had guns, all these people too. This was like the hardcore unit. Horses, helicopters. It was like the gumball rally. There was people in all sorts of vehicles going.

It was crazy. Mad, mad, mad, mad world or whatever it was. They got an ice cream truck somewhere. Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah, there's a guy in one of those pedaling with a propeller above his head. He's pedaling a flying thing. I don't know what the fuck. Some sort of automobile.

Some sort of flying automobile that uses pedals. The public was urged not to approach him. He's considered dangerous, obviously. They used an aboriginal tracker. I don't know if he's an aboriginal guy who's a tracker or if he tracks aboriginals. I'm not sure which one, but it sounds bad. I'm betting that he's aboriginal and a tracker. I think so, yeah.

He tastes dirt and knows what direction they went. This is like real Dog the Bounty Hunter type thing here. A guy named Jimmy James, who ends up actually finding him about a week later. He tracks him using discarded soft drink cans and

things to follow him. Amazing. That's what he did. He picks up his garbage along the way and picks up his path. He licks it and he's like, this is him. Yeah, he licks it and he goes this way. He went west. He's headed to Per him. Amazing. That's what he did. He picks up his garbage along the way and picks up his path. He licks it and he's like, this is him. Yeah, he licks it and he goes this way. He went west. He's headed to Perth. He's catching bats in the middle of the night and eating them over a fucking fire. They're like, we have a cooler full of shit.

He's like, no, no. I do not want. I like this. He just keeps eating here. I like it this way. So I like it this way. So finally, on August 28th, 1982, he's exhausted, and he just fell over, basically collapsed, fell asleep under a tree about 70 kilometers outside of Renmark, which is just over the

border into New South Wales. 70 fucking kilometers he walked? 70 kilometers he got out of there. I don't know how far away they were. I don't know where he was when he got out, though. That's 70 kilometers from Renmark. That's just the nearest town. Jimmy James tells police that he's confident that Smith is hiding out somewhere in a 500-square-meter radius of a bunch of bushes and things like that.

It's a police dog. They send police dogs in there. He narrowed it down to 500-square-meters. That's amazing. I think he's, based on this Pepsi can, I think he's in there. Based on the freshness of that urine pile and that poo, he's definitely in there. And that still smoldering cool cigarette, I think it's okay. That's incredible.

So they send police dogs into that area, and they find him passed out. And there he is. He was in shorts and a cap and had an open flannel shirt. Didn't put up any resistance. Because he was sunburnt to shit. He looked like John Candy in Summer Rental. They described him as being in a, quote, jovial mood. They said he chatted up the captors when they got him.

They talked to him. He drank cordially, they said. He ate a sandwich, hung out. He was totally fine. Wow. They took him back. He's extradited back to Adelaide. This is also, he had been charged with, they find out now,

they didn't know about it even before. He had been charged in 1975 with the rape of a teenager. Asshole. Yeah. So this, but it was later dropped by prosecutors. We don't know exactly why. But now we know he probably did it. Yeah.

They also charge and convict two other people, an inmate and a person on the outside. I'm sure a woman he met. Persisting his fucking. Yeah, for aiding and abetting his escape. Good. So he's, I would say this woman he met for aiding and abetting his escape. Good. So I would say this is an eligible bachelor right now. You don't get any more eligible. Yeah, he finds some women.

He finds an American woman in 1985 through the pen pal program, a woman named Barbara Beauregard. And now we find out the last name. I wanted to save that. I didn't want to give that away and say by marriage because you would have went, huh? So there we go. He took her name. He takes half of her name.

Well, shit, if she's willing to marry him in prison, he should call himself Barbara at that point. Fuck, I don't care. He's a Barbara Smith. Jesus Christ. Hilarious. You're lucky. She moves into a unit close to the prison. She finds a flat close to the prison so she could be close to him.

What? And come see him all the time and shit like that. She fell in love through pen pal letters. It's unbelievable. She came in at one point because there's always reporters wanting to talk to her. She screamed at reporters, quote, leave us alone. We only want to be together. I am sick and tired of the newspapers calling my husband a killer.

Well, tough shit. You shouldn't have married a fucking killer. Yeah, and then she also said, if you want to talk to me and get my story, you better pay me. She wants money. She said, quote, why should I not make any money out of this? We have been treated badly enough already. Wow. Why should I not make money?

Because I'm with a guy in prison who murdered children. Wow. I think that's I need money for that. Obviously, that's of course a fucked up view of the world. What a fucking logic. Wow. So they get married in the prison. I mean, a woman that marries a guy that's in prison for murdering three people, you

got to figure this is her behavior. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. That's a good point. I'm not putting too much. I'm not lending credence to her behavior. She's a little loopy, I think, too, here. I mean, the whole thing.

So she's with him. They get married later in the year. I'm sure it was beautiful. I'm sure it was just heavenly. The colors were gray and white. Oh, God. Her dress was gorgeous. The cake, the flowers.

Jimmy, it was amazing. They hopped off on a kangaroo with Just Married and cans dangling off its tail. Hilarious. So at this point, he starts battling for release. He starts arguing that he's reformed and no longer a threat to anyone. I've killed three people. I've been in prison for eight years, minus that month when I escaped. Right.

Which was only three years ago. I should clearly be out. I'm ready to be just integrated back into society. Holy hell. Holy shit here. Yeah. He said he's just going to throw himself on the mercy of the courts. He claimed the triple murders were an aberration.

A what? An ab- just, that happens. No. That's not an ab- that's an aberration a what an app just that happens but no that's not an app that's an aberration that gets you put in jail forever yeah that's that's that's called an aberration that's called life in prison dickhead yeah if you got drunk one night and and you know blacked out and and uh got a dui or something that's an aberration if it happened that's an aberration that's an aberration yeah That's an aberration. Yeah, that's a better way of putting it here. He's a model prisoner other than his escape. Right.

That's the other thing, too. He's charmed everybody. A forensic psychologist said that it was the optimal time to release Smith. What? Oh, yeah. He said that, wow, at this stage, that he'd taken the name of his wife, and that was a good sign, too, that he was respecting women more. It's insane, man. His lawyer said he had come to terms with the enormity of offense and there was a danger of him becoming institutionalized if he remained behind bars. You don't want to break his spirit, Jimmy. We don't want to break this guy's spirit. He needs to go out there and believe in himself to kill more children. to go out there and believe in himself to kill more children. Yeah.

He said there was no future whatsoever for him in the, quote, dog-eat-dog prison system, and he wanted to live a long life with his wife. Well, you could have done that if you didn't kill three fucking people. You had a woman that was willing to marry you. You could have lived a happy life with her. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's absolutely ridiculous, man. What happens here is his release, what they do is he doesn't get released here, but he does get a non-parole period to put in for him.

So there's some sort of structure as to how it goes. It's a non-parole period of 22 years starting in 1977, July 16, 1977, when he first got taken into custody. From then, 22 years later, he's eligible. So that's 1999. Now, November 10th, 1992, by the way, he's sentenced to 12 months imprisonment on top for the escape in 82. So they're just around sentencing him for that. At this point, they put him in something called the cottages in 1992, which is like a kind

of a halfway house type of deal like tent city with walls yeah it's it's what you do is uh you can you get day release basically and you can go try to find a job and have day release and all this shit this is in 1993 you are so nice it's very yeah they're nice that this is crazy uh yeah they said that you know they need he needs to be able to fit back into society, which is true. But when you have a child killer, we don't really want them in society, I don't think, here. He gets a job being an assistant on a delivery van, engaged in collecting donated goods and delivering beds and other property to people in need. And none of these are supervised, by the way.

He's just out there. On May 6, 1993, he's released on home detention. So now he's on house arrest. Holy shit. He resides full time with his wife there. This is unbelievable. His kind of caseworker said he had some contact with him, but not a great deal. Yeah, just... Minimal fucking supervision.

I don't even know what to say about this. Yeah. So on April 1, 1994, he is released on parole. Done. Free and clear. He's not on house arrest. He can go wherever he wants. He can do whatever he wants.

You can stay out. Just obey them. Yeah, this is based on good behavior in prison. His parole period is to expire in 2004. It's a 10-year period. This is crazy. It's crazy.-year period. This is crazy. It's crazy. So let's hope everything goes okay, right?

He gets released. By the way, when he was released to home detention and everything else, huge public outcry. People were fucking pissed in this small town. They're like, we don't want this asshole around in this area. It wasn't really in this exact town at the time. But they're pissed. They don't want this asshole around. Victim's relatives said that it was, quote, downright ridiculous and he should have at least served the 22-year non-parole period.

Maybe they could have at least just kept him that long. He said that he was fine, obviously. He's totally fine. So eight days after he is released, eight days later. Eight days. Eight days. A week and a day. A week and a day.

He finds himself in a car with a 21-year-old woman. The only name we have is Ms. Grice, and I think they're protecting her identity, which, great. I don't want to out anybody on that sort of thing. That might be an alias, whatever. Doesn't matter. A 21-year-old woman. He drives her to a remote spot at the Cuddly Creek in Adelaide Hills and repeatedly rapes her. Holy shit.

Eight fucking days. Eight fucking days. Eight days is all it took for him to show his true colors, that he's a goddamn monster. Unbelievable. She had bruising to her arms and legs also. She was dragged back into the car after repeatedly trying to escape, physically dragging her back into the car. He says that there was no rape and he just paid her to have sex with him three times.

Wow. He said, just a nice sex worker that I picked up and we had just a business transaction and that was it. Respectable lady and I paid her for her time. That's all there is to it. My God. She's a professional woman. She needs to be paid for her time.

He also claims that she was addicted to Rufinol. She's addicted to Rufinol. She's addicted to Rufins, is what she said, is what he says, and was also a recovering heroin addict and that she was in withdrawal and lying about the attack. Who's addicted to Rufins? Addicted to, well, some of those actually bodybuilders. Really? Who are hugely addicted. The wrestlers, remember Chris Adams, that whole thing. But, yeah, this woman is a heroin addict who's in withdrawal and lying about the attack completely because this benefits her.

I don't know how. Yeah. He is then at this point arrested. They take her in. They take him in, obviously. And he is convicted again of rape this time and sentenced to 12 years imprisonment, later reduced to eight on appeal. What the hell? They reduce it to eight on appeal.

Why would you reduce? If anybody's case doesn't deserve to be reduced on any shit, it was this guy's. He's so violent. The judge said something nice to him, though, as he was sentencing him. This I like. He said, quote, quite obviously your acts were premeditated. Your conduct shows you are a man capable of violent acts. The agony and trauma which the young lady has suffered was apparent over the long period

in which she gave her evidence. It is quite impossible to assess the harm which your atrocious actions have caused. Awesome. He did everything but call him a cunt,

basically. And in Australia, that's not a big deal. Yeah. So, wow. A cunt is too endearing down there. That's what it is.

He can't call him one because that's like a friend. What do you like the guy? What the fuck, man? May as well call him mate. What the hell it is. He can't call him one because that's like a friend. What do you like the guy? What the fuck, man? May as well call him mate. What the hell? Yeah. So he ended up, he's convicted without penalty also on indecent assault and another assault

charge with this because the rape is the thing that carries the big deal here that we would have stacked him up and said, okay, that's another five years, another four years for that. He's sentenced on November 25th, 1994. He's going in there. Then they have a, he's participating in all sorts of programs, anger management, domestic violence, victim awareness, drug, alcohol, cognitive skills, literacy, enumer, all, everything that they can give him, a program with social skills, everything where he can go, look at

all the stuff I've done since I've been in prison. He's gaming the hell out of their system. That's what they do here. They have a hearing, a non-parole hearing to figure out how long, if a non-parole period would be better for him or not. They talk to social workers. They talk to all sorts of social workers. They're like, I think if you put him in a lower security prison and kind of worked him

out, it's like, we did that last time. Right. And it took him eight days to rape somebody. Remember when he escaped when we did that to him? And then the other time that- Jesus Christ, man. He fucking raped a woman after we let him go. He goes a-raping when he gets out.

That's all there is to it. So, yeah, they talked to a bunch of different psychiatrists. I'm going to go out on a limb and say he actually did that one rape that he was accused of first. I think he did. Yeah. I'm going to go ahead and say yes. I'm going to say he probably, without much fucking reluctancy, did that one rape that he was accused of first. I think he did. Yeah. I'm going to go ahead and say yes. I'm going to say he probably, without much fucking reluctancy, did that. We are going to stamp him rapist here on the show, I feel like.

He is definitely a rapist. So, yeah, he is up for parole in November 2009. He gets up for parole that quickly. That's 15 years. But still, there's a prosecutor here that is saying, I don't fucking think so. Good. Mike Rann, this guy, says there's, quote, zero chance of him being released.

He said, quote, Beauregard Smith would have zero chance of getting my signature on his release. He is where he belongs in jail where he'll stay. So, yeah. Relative of Sandra Holland read a thing. She said, quote, as he has threatened my life, I have changed my name, moved house a number of times, have silent phone numbers and special considerations on the electric roll. All of this to safeguard me and my family from him. The woman is living in private.

Yes. Because that monster could get out of prison. Yeah. She says, quote, I am still terrified of this person as he is a diagnosed psychopath and will definitely harm or kill someone else once he's released. And it's true. And several several doctors diagnosed him as a psychopath and all sorts of you can look into the technical terms of that. But we don't have time for that shit right now. Yeah, it's it's one other psychiatrist said unless there's a, quote, meaningful intervention, he's still going to always be a danger to the community and especially women.

Like a noose. That's the only meaningful intervention. That's it. So after all of these constant, there's so many psychological evaluations, people, I would not recommend that Mr. Beauregard be released on parole at this time. All sorts of people saying, don't release this asshole, please. He's said to be a model prisoner because he's trying to game the system and he knows how to do it. And they haven't fell for it yet.

Luckily, one psychologist said this that I thought was very interesting. He said, quote, there would be a requirement to intensively and comprehensively assess him in advance of this release with the requirement of review and outcome data being monitored. The implications of other profile scores, specifically the strong tendency to create a positive impression of himself, may lead to any such evaluation being invalid. And in order for that, for this not to be the case, would require Mr. Beauregard Smith to change the habitual style which he has been present since early childhood. In other words, he's full of fucking shit.

He's full of shit. And rage. And rage. And if you talk to him, he's going to be full of shit just enough to get what he wants, and then he's going to go do other shit. And then he's going to go bring out the rage. Don't believe him. He's an asshole.

So that's what they're saying. And that is this asshole, and that is Woodside, South Australia. And he's still in prison. He's still in prison. They have not let his ass out yet. As far as I could tell, I looked at everything, and there has not been any reports of his being released from prison. Thank shit that they're taking some. And that's been 20 years now since that rape.

So he's in jail for the rape longer than he was in jail for the murder. That's unbelievable. Which they bring up the murder every time, too. They're like, look, yeah, he's in jail for rape, and if you take that for what it is, whatever. But he also killed three people. He did some other shit. You put that together with the rape. It's pretty much.

Kind of bad. Yeah. Anything. He's like an octopus. Just anything. You can get his, you know, his suction cups, whatever the hell they're called. They get killed or raped. That's it.

Yeah. Just tentacles everywhere. Everything gets killed, raped, or stolen. Strangle, stolen, dump. Asshole. He's a scumbag. So that's this asshole. And that's James Beauregard Smith,

George Smith, whatever the hell he wants to call himself, dickhead, and poor Sandra and Craig and Scott and that poor little girl who, god damn it. I hope she's living a happy life. I don't know what happened to her. She's probably not. That is so sad. It's so sad. So yeah, this

whole thing, that's a mess, but that's Australia. There you go, Australia. We did one. Everybody watch Crocodile Kangaroo. It comes on Saturday mornings at 8 o'clock over there in Australia. Very nice for the kids. Crocodile, the pissed off crocodile kangaroo. You can do that.

And if you like that and if you like Crocodile Kangaroo, go ahead and get on iTunes and give us a five-star rating, which would make our day. Like we said, tell us what you had for lunch. It really doesn't matter. Tell us you love crocodile kangaroos. Please, because everybody should. If that's not enough for you, and you can and you want to and you feel like it and you just feel it in your heart. And we'll appreciate

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Facebook, Facebook.com slash small town pod. And here are some awesome people that Jimmy has a list of that were so nice to us this week with your amazing, amazing contributions, donations, contributions, every great thing you've nice to us this week with your amazing, amazing contributions and donations. Contributions. Every great thing you've done.

It's been amazing. This week, thank you guys all for the emails. They've been amazing. They've been really, really great. And the recommendations, we read every single one of them. If we don't reply to you, I apologize. There's not a lot of time, but we do appreciate all of them. But thank you.

We read every single one, I promise. We definitely read them. And I take down every case suggestion that you guys give. I have, you have no idea the cash list I have of them. But thank you. We read every single one. We definitely read them. And I take down every case suggestion that you guys give. You have no idea the cash list I have of these. I take them all down. So thank you. Amber Pichasic. You know what? I'm going to try this. Pichasic. Amber Pichasic and

Chelsea Piskor in Minnesota. They're both in Minnesota and one's in Wisconsin, but she travels commutes to fucking Minnesota for work. They both donated this week. They're both in Minnesota and one's in Wisconsin, but she travels, commutes to fucking Minnesota for work. They both donated this week. They worked together, so thank you both very, very much. Deidre Kohler, Helen Krumpholt, Valerie Galloway,

Renan Moore, Jenny Petko, Maggie Eichhorn, I'm not sure how it's pronounced, but thank you, and also great email and great story. We got that one, so thank you. Kat Power up in New York finally jumped on board to donate. Thanks, Cat.

Thanks, Cat. Appreciate that and everybody else too. Julia Schuster, Sean Sheridan, Jess Landgren in Australia. Of course, Jess. Thank you so much again for us. Thank you, Jess, you're a darling. Corinne Price, Bethany McGregor, Michael Bretz, Scott Countryman, Ranger and Anna.

He has those two dogs that he sent us. That's cool, yeah. Thanks, Scott. I appreciate it. No doubt, man. Thank you. Matthew Carroll, Kathleen Pina or Pina. I'm not sure which one.

There wasn't a little notation over the N. It might just be Pina. I'm not sure. Jeff Skiner or Skinner. There's only one N. That's weird. Donald Barnwell. All sorts of weird shit going on here, guys. Katie Conlin?

Alex? This one's fucking fascinating. Innaturb? I-N-N-A-T-I-R-B. Innaturb? Yeah, that sounds right. I have no idea. You're asking me.

I'm not sure. Tori? SPK? Those are two different people, Tori and SPK, by the way. Okay, thank you, Tori. Thank you, SPK. Erica Hogan, Katie Allen, and Don Bain. Thank you all so, so much.

This was a really great week, not just for interaction and emails, but for all the donations. You guys really came through, so thank you so much. You keep us afloat, and you keep us going, and you keep us wanting to wake up in the morning, so thank you. And humble as fuck. Thank you, guys. Yeah, honestly, it's hard not to be. You can find me on Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat,

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journey we're on all across the world now. I have another international case in Italy we're going to do at some point too. That'll probably be 10, 12 episodes from now. We'll go back outside. Next week we're going to be back in the U.S., but do that. And until next week, guys, it's been our pleasure. Bye! Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Small Town Murder early and ad-free on Amazon Music.

Download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen early and ad-free with Wondery Plus and Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondery.com slash survey. Welcome to the small town of Chinook, where faith runs deep and secrets run deeper. In this new thriller, available exclusively on Wondery+, religion and crime collide when a gruesome murder rocks the isolated Montana community. Everyone is quick to point their fingers at a drug-addicted teenager, but local deputy Ruth Vogel isn't convinced. She suspects connections to a powerful religious group.

Enter federal agent V.B. Loro, who has been investigating a local church for possible criminal activity. The pair form an unlikely partnership to catch the killer, unearthing secrets that leave Ruth torn between her duty to the law, her religious convictions, and her very own family. But something more sinister than murder is afoot, and someone is watching Ruth. With an all-star cast led by Emmy nominee Sanaa Lathan and Star Wars' Kelly Marie Tran, Chinook is available exclusively and ad-free

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