Small Town Murder - #58 - "Serial Killer" Doesn't Even Describe It in Northampton, Massachusetts
Episode Date: February 21, 2018This week, in the up & down town of Northampton, Massachusetts, one person secretly took an unknown, and untold amount of lives, after being given the ultimate trust. From strangers to sp...ouses, no act is too brazen, or depraved for this particular person. It's quite a twisting tale of death & deception!! Along the way, we find out what group of people can change a town for the better, how understanding some spouses can be, and just how many people you can murder in cold blood, under everyone's noses, before anyone even notices! Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman New episodes every Thursday!!Please subscribe, rate, and review!Listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to podcasts!Head to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things Small Town Murder!For merchandise: crimeinsports.threadless.comCheck out James and Jimmie's other show: Crime in Sports Follow us on social media!Facebook: facebook.com/smalltownpodInstagram: instagram.com/smalltownmurderTwitter: twitter.com/MurderSmall Contact the show: crimeinsports@gmail.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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This week, we look at the revitalized town of Northampton, Massachusetts,
where several mysterious deaths raise everyone's suspicions.
Welcome to Small Town Murder.
Yay!
Oh, yay, indeed.
My name is James Petrigallo.
I'm here with my co-host.
I am Jimmy Wissman.
Thank you, folks, so much for joining us this week on another exciting edition of Small Town Murder.
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It's exciting every damn week.
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It really does go a long, long way.
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you'll like that show for sure like i guarantee you'll like it if you don't like sports it does
not matter one bit. Very little.
Very, very little.
It's about crime, and it's about us making fun of a moron.
All you're going to hear is what team they played for.
That's it.
You're going to hear a few things. What sport?
And we'll be making fun of it along the way.
It's not like we're sitting here being stat jockeys telling you all this stuff and going in-depth.
I like sports.
I don't like them that much.
Exactly.
I like sports.
I like making fun of assholes a lot more than I like sports.
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Well, they're awful.
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They're awful, and they goddamn deserve it.
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Lots of fun.
Before we get to the show, before we get to the show, we have to do it.
Do it every damn week. We got to do the disclaimer. We got to we get to the show, we have to do it. Do it every damn week.
We got to do the disclaimer.
We got to do the disclaimer, guys.
We got to do it.
This is a comedy podcast.
It is.
Okay.
We're stand-up comedians.
We are.
So we're going to make jokes.
We will.
All the facts are real.
They are.
Research is real.
Cases are real.
We're not making stuff up for the point of humor like, oh, this would be hilarious if
this person now did this.
No, no.
It's all factual.
Just we're going to make fun of some things.
We make fun of small towns.
We make fun of bumbling police forces when they screw something up and let a murderer go for five years and they kill five more people.
That sort of thing.
We make fun of murderers.
They're murderers.
Who cares?
They deserve it.
At least we have no legal recourse.
All we can do is mock them.
We're not self-important podcasters.
No.
We know all we can do is mock them. We know our self-important podcasters. No. We know all we can do is mock them.
We know our role.
We're positive of it.
We know our role.
And that's it.
And our role is to make fun of these people.
What we don't do, what our role isn't, is to make fun of the victims or the victims' families.
We try not to do that.
We're assholes, but we're not scumbags.
That's true.
That's the thing it is.
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It's not that bad.
If you think true crime and comedy never belong together ever, this isn't for you.
Have a good one.
See you later.
If we send, we say adieu.
And you say, shut up and give me murder.
And that's what we're going to do right now with those people the hell out of here.
Let's go on a trip.
Jimmy, what do you say?
I'm in.
Bags packed?
Yes.
All right.
We're coming up from Virginia.
So sticky.
It was sticky down there.
It was racism. It was a little
racism-y down there. We're going up north this
week, though. We're going up north. We're going to the northeast.
It's got its own issues, but we're going
up to the northeast. We're going to Massachusetts.
Alright. Yeah, since we were just in Massachusetts
in Boston, we're going to say
thank you to Massachusetts for
having us. They say it's nice.
That is freezing. It's like 42, and they're like, it's nice out.
No, it's not.
You're an asshole.
That's why I live out here now.
That is why I live out here now.
But we're going to go up there.
That's how we say thank you.
We're going to mock a town in your state.
Thank you very much.
This is what we think is bad about you.
Fuck your weather.
Fuck your weather and your state.
So here we go.
We're going to go to Northampton, Massachusetts here. And there's
a North Hampton, an East Hampton, a West Hampton.
There's all the Hamptons right around there. Of course.
There's a Hampton Inn. It should be. That's right in the
middle. Dead in the middle. And then everything
else is named after the one Hampton
Inn in town. It's the original Hampton Inn. It's on the east side
of the Hampton Inn. It's a
Victorian bed and breakfast. It's where
they started. Started from humble roots
that Hampton Inn. Victorian bed and breakfast. They serve you raisin bran in from Humble Roots that afternoon. Victorian bed and breakfast.
They serve you Raisin Bran in a small box.
That's it right there.
So it's about an hour, 45 minutes to Boston, about three hours to New York City.
It's kind of right in the middle of Massachusetts.
It's that kind of used to be the blue collar kind of like they consider this, even though
geographically it's not part of it, they consider this part of the Rust Belt back in the day.
Like, it was that sort of thing, a lot of factory work.
You could come here, get a job in a factory in the 50s and 60s and, you know, make a good living and have a house and have two cars and do all that sort of thing.
And nice little American town type of deal.
It's in Hampshire County, which at least it's not named after the town.
It's not Old Hampshire?
It's not Northampton County or Hampton County or something like that.
It's not South Hampshire, it would be.
Zip code 01060.
A lot of zeros in that zip code.
Boy, that is base level zip code.
Area code 413.
It's a big town, 35.8 square miles.
My Christ.
Yeah, 34 of them are on land.
And as we get into it, I'll tell you you the population, this is as high as we'll go
right here. This is our ceiling on population.
We hit our absolute
limit of as high as we'll go.
I won't go 30.
Like 25 normally,
30 if it's a great story. Put it that way.
But I won't go above 30. And this is
just under the deal.
But it's still a smallish type of town,
especially for the northeast, a lot of big cities.
It has a small town feel.
It's a sprawling small town.
It is.
It is.
And it has a small town feel, though.
It has like that kind of a feel.
We'll get into it.
The motto here, Caritas Educatio Justitia.
Fuck you.
Oh, Latin.
Caring, education, justice.
Seven people in town know that.
Yes, that's it.
Well, it's on the seal. Yeah. They're very big with this town seal. Of course. They've updated it. We'll talk about it. Don't worry. Seven people in town know that. Yes, that's it. Well, it's on the seal.
They're very big with this town seal.
Of course.
They've updated it.
We'll talk about it.
Don't worry.
It's in there.
It also has several nicknames.
They call it the Paradise City from back in the day, and they also call it from now Lesbianville,
USA.
Really?
Oh, yeah.
Get out of here.
Oh, it's Lesbianville, USA.
They call it that?
They call it that.
It's Lesbianville, USA.
We'll talk about it.
It's been revitalized, and it's been revitalized by lesbians.
Good for them.
Good job.
Did they pick the Guns N' Roses song as their town anthem?
I think they did.
They did a good job.
Paradise City.
They really called it that.
That's old.
From back in the day.
Oh, really?
That's from like 1700s.
Before the Guns N' Roses song.
Way before.
I think Guns N' Roses, it's after this town.
That's what it was.
Excellent.
Got stuck here.
Originally, Northampton was known as Norwatuck and Nanotuck, which means in the midst of the river.
So it's named by the Native Americans that were there originally here.
It's given its present name by John A. King.
Guarantee you a big douchebag.
For sure.
He was born in 1629. So, yeah, he was one of the original English settlers and supposedly came over here, you know, for the king and named this town for Northampton, England, which is his birthplace.
Got it.
Which is where it all started.
Everybody, they move here, name their shit after England and name it something on the East Coast.
And then their descendants move westward and name somewhere in North Dakota after Massachusetts.
And that's what we have.
That's why you're going to end up with a Northampton, Wyoming.
Where'd that come from?
This is where I came from.
Was King his real name, or was he just came here and picked a new name?
No, no, he was John A. King, which sounds like he made it up.
It's like, I'm the A1 King.
I'm the first king in the phone book.
Well, when they come over, too, they often will change a name to whatever they want.
Why not?
And he's coming here for the king.
What the hell?
He likely named himself king.
They had a great awakening, they called it here.
There's a guy named Jonathan Edwards, not the disgraced politician.
Right.
Or the douchebag that can talk to fucking dead people.
Or the dead guy.
Yeah, the dead talking people fucking scam artist.
Fucking thief.
Thief.
Allegedly thief.
Yeah, we don't want to get sued.
But allegedly.
For sure. Allegedly scamming thief. For sure. Allegedly thief. Yeah, we don't want to get sued, but allegedly. For sure.
Allegedly scamming thief.
For sure paid without proof.
We'll call him an entertainer.
Let's just say that.
There you go.
He had a TV show.
Same thing.
Hey, it's entertaining.
You can't sue us for that, asshole.
So anyway, yeah, so they had something called the Great Awakening.
They had a Christian revival in Northampton, and I guess in the winter of 1734, and in
that spring in 1735, it got
so crazy that it started to threaten the town businesses, like that weren't Christian enough
for these people and that sort of thing.
It started to subside a little bit.
There was a little bit of a backlash, and then it just came back even worse after that.
Boy, oh, man, they just, man, these people were hardcore.
This Edwards guy is considered one of the founders of evangelical Christianity.
That's an awakening?
The great awakening to close your minds.
Sorry, religious people.
That's my point.
They literally were like, don't say that.
Don't sell that book.
They were doing things like that.
They weren't saying like, hey, love everybody, praise Jesus.
They were like, don't do this shit.
That's not an awakening at all.
That's fucking putting people to sleep.
Now, at the same time, he's also credited with being
one of the primary beginning
people of transcendentalism,
which is interesting. That shit I kind of
believe in.
It seems odd.
Yeah, no, it's just an odd thing for this guy
to be like, yeah, I could see that. And that.
Now, Northampton also, not one to be left out of
shit, okay? They had their own witch trials in the 1700s. Really? They were like, look, there's see that. And that. Now, Northampton also not one to be left out of shit. Okay? They had their own witch trials in the 1700s.
Really?
They were like, look, there's a lot of witch trials going on, and clearly we have an awakening
happening.
Let's burn some bitches at the stake.
Well, Salem beat you.
Let's do this.
Yeah, they were, they got all the frat boy bros, got them all, like, let's burn these
bitches, man.
Got them all.
It was not a good scene at all for anybody.
No witches were executed there, though.
Oh, really?
That's nice of them.
I don't know what they did with the witches.
They had a trial, and then they were like, I don't know.
Just picked them out and converted them?
Yeah, maybe that's what they did.
Awoken them.
You have been awoken now.
Definitely.
There was a rebellion.
They had Shays' Rebellion, it was called, led by a guy named Daniel Shays.
He led a group of Revolutionary War veterans calling themselves the Shaysites,
which is a terrible name for anybody.
They could have picked a name.
You pick any name you want.
The chair is much better.
You could have called yourself the Lions or something.
Anything.
You could have picked a fucking name.
Instead, they picked one that's named after a lounge.
Like a lounge chair.
Yeah, exactly.
Thank God they didn't have basketball back then.
They would have terrible team names.
Awful.
Awful here. Yeah, exactly. Thank God they didn't have basketball back then. They would have terrible team names. Yeah, no doubt. Awful. Awful here.
Yeah, he led all these rebels against what – he didn't like the way that we were forming this new country,
and he didn't like the way it was being formed with the perceived economic and civil rights injustices.
They attacked an armory.
Oh.
Overthrew the local government in Springfield.
Jesus.
Yeah, they did a whole deal.
The whole thing actually drew George Washington out of retirement and into public life.
This is dead serious.
This is dead serious.
George Washington actually coming back in to deal with this actually led to him being
president because it thrust him back into the whole deal.
And they were like, well, you should be president because clearly you know how to take care
of shit like this.
Clearly you give a shit.
Yeah, you should be king, they said, actually.
They said, I'm good.
And he's like, no, no, no, no.
Let's take it down a notch to president.
What do you say, guys?
Also, everybody chill out because I own slaves.
We don't want that.
Yeah, let's calm down here.
Calm down.
I do not need to be king.
I'm banging my neighbor's wife.
A cherry tree got chopped down.
I didn't say I chopped it down.
I said it got chopped down.
Let's just put it that way and leave it at that.
The rumor is he got pneumonia by banging his neighbor's
wife. He came home. He
jumped out the window in the freezing cold
with his dick flopping and jumped on his horse
and rode away. And he caught pneumonia
riding in the snow. I would say that
that's, I would believe that, except
I feel like if I've read a lot about George Washington
and I feel like if George Washington was having
sex with your wife and you walked in, I feel like
he would walk, he would stand up with his hands on his hips triumphantly and say, I did this well.
I did this well.
You weren't doing it well enough, and I had to take care of the business.
And they would be like, oh, okay.
It's kind of an unbelievable story.
He was a huge guy, too.
Also an ugly man.
And I don't believe there was two women on earth that wanted to fuck him.
That's the other thing.
Maybe that's why it's a lie, too.
But if it is true that he fucked somebody and got pneumonia and died, that's a trooper's way of going out.
That's pretty impressive.
That's something, man.
1805, a crowd of 15,000 people gathered to watch the executions of two Irishmen convicted of murder.
This was Dominic Daly and James Halligan.
All the people there, they were very anti-Catholic and anti-everything like that.
So they had no evidence against these people whatsoever, and they hung them, and that became
a big deal.
They ended up being pardoned in 1984.
So that'll help a lot.
Hold on.
Thanks.
They were pardoned after.
180 years later, they pardoned them.
We hanged them, and today we're going to...
Thanks.
1984.
Van Halen's on the radio, and we're now pardoning people that have been hanged 200 years ago.
To accept this pardon, we ask the great, great, great, great grandson of the hanged man to jump.
Jump.
He might as well jump.
Fucking ridiculous.
That's the pardon.
That is so ridiculous here.
Smith College is here.
It was a college for women then.
We give you two tickets to Panama, sir.
Two tickets to Panama. sir. Two tickets to Panama.
Panama.
Panama.
Okay.
But only if you're hot for teaching.
That was them too, right?
I hope so.
Yeah, it was them.
That was them.
I was going to say, them or Motley Crue, but they're smoking in the boys' room and they're hot for teaching.
And that's a cover.
That's garbage, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know that's got to be from the 50s.
And so is Elder Skelter.
Those fuckers, they're robbing everybody.
The other one, too.
Shout at the devil?
No, that's theirs.
Mama Don't Dance, that's another one.
They're doing old shit.
That poison sucks.
I loved them.
God.
Well, yeah, when you're an eight, it was like, yeah, they're cool.
That guy's got like-
Yeah, this is great.
That guy's wearing fishnets.
That's so ballsy.
He's got a bright pink guitar with six necks on it.
That's terrific.
Like, that's literally what you think when you're six.
How are you playing all of those?
Yeah, wow.
I like the way he does his makeup.
Right.
He looks pretty.
That guy looks very pretty.
Speaking of ladies who knew how to do their makeup, there were some that went to Smith
College.
It's one of the Seven Sisters Colleges.
It includes alumni Sylvia Plath, Barbara Bush, Nancy Reagan, multiple Republican wives,
white presidential wives.
Yeah, not too bad.
Gloria Steinem, who I assume would brawl with Barbara Bush in the hallways.
And Julia Child went there even.
Jesus Christ.
Not bad.
And the first game of women's basketball was played there in 1892.
That is why they're the lesbian city.
There you go. That's why.
There you go.
That's why.
It's Lesbianville, USA.
United States President Calvin Coolidge worked as a lawyer in Northampton and was the city's
mayor in 1910 and 1911.
This is the most prestigious city we've had yet.
How many people that have lived in the White House have come out of this fucking town?
This is ridiculous.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He went on.
Coolidge was a Massachusetts state senator, then a lieutenant governor, then a governor,
and he was vice president.
And that's really working your way up the ladder, up to president.
Nobody works their way up like that.
Nobody does that anymore.
That's real.
He started as mayor of a town with like 10,000 people in it.
Right.
And he was like, okay, worked his way up to fucking president.
That's what you do.
That's how you politic.
That's kind of a shit president though, Coolidge.
So maybe that's not the best way to do it.
I'm not sure. Yeah. He moved back to Northampton after he was done being president. That's how much politic. That's kind of a shit president, though, Coolidge. So maybe that's not the best way to do it. I'm not sure.
Yeah, he moved back to Northampton after he was done being president.
That's how much he liked it.
And then he died four years later.
Oh, really?
I'm not really giving him a lot of credit, Northampton, for that.
He died four years after his presidency?
You killed Coolidge, guys.
Yeah, way to go, fuckers.
Nice job.
Nice job.
You killed Calvin Coolidge.
Very great.
He had the coolest name of all the presidents.
Coolidge, yeah.
Calvin.
Calvin's badass. Calvin Coolidge sounds like a black dude. He does. coolest name of all the presidents. Coolidge. Calvin. Calvin's badass.
Calvin Coolidge sounds like a black dude.
It does.
That sounds like a black jazz musician.
Elect Calvin Coolidge.
And then he hits the horn.
If you lined them all up and had the name Calvin Coolidge and you had to, if you didn't know any presidents and you had to put them under the names, you'd for sure put that under
the black guy.
Well, unless you saw Barack Obama first.
You'd be like, you know, that's the black guy. No, you you saw Barack Obama first. Then you'd be like, yeah, no, that's the black guy.
No, you'd probably try to find the most Middle Eastern-looking fuck.
I'm sure of that.
Still, he's the darkest.
We're going there.
I don't know what to say.
It's not Andrew Jackson.
I know that much for a fact.
I know that shit for a fact.
Yeah, Calvin Coolidge.
That's what it sounds like.
That's such a cool name.
Yeah, I'll let Calvin Coolidge.
The coolest jazz cat running for president this side of the Mississippi.
Straight out of South Hampton.
That's right.
Straight out of North Hampton.
That's impressive.
That's impressive right there.
Oh, it was North Hampton.
North Hampton.
Straight out of North Hampton, baby.
He's one of those Hamptons.
1960, it had 30,000 people.
It had its peak of population in 1960.
It's the most people they've had.
There was lots of jobs.
Like I said, this was a good place to get a blue-collar job, and you could make a living, and it wasn't a bad place to be.
Now, after that, though, after the 60s, just like everywhere else, and especially the Northeast and especially the Rust Belt, which really got hit hard, all these cities and Pittsburgh and everywhere in there.
Listen to what Billy Joel saw.
There you go.
Allentown is this place.
It's the same thing here.
In the 70s, it went right down in the shitter, this place, like everywhere else.
Yeah, there was a economic decline was terrible.
People who used to have middle-class jobs and worked in factories started moving out of this place,
turned into kind of a shithole for a while.
Don't worry, though.
It'll be back, and we'll find out where here.
Now, Sahara Desert Fart Factor of the Week. Fantastic. Oh, we have
it here. It's about the town seal.
The town seal. They're huge on this damn town seal.
They give a shit. They add shit to it.
The moths. There's moths
around the outside circle of the seal. Moths.
Little moths. They are silk
moths. Of course. Representing the silk
industry in Northampton, and a
short-lived utopian
community. A community-based project
in the 1800s located in the Florence section of the city.
Members of the community were deeply concerned with racial and gender justice and tried to
create a self-sustaining community by raising silkworms.
I'd like to see this.
And the trees that they like.
Because how do you get little moths on there?
It's around the outside and it literally just looks like little white, like little Vs.
Like you would draw a little.
Oh, boy.
That's all it is, basically.
That's silk moths.
So that's that there.
All right.
Yeah.
Oh, boy, here.
Nowadays, though, it's gotten better.
Starting in the 80s, it really started to pick up, and I'll tell you why when we get to things to do.
But now it has what they call a thriving cultural center.
A lot of tourists go there, lots of restaurants.
They have a lot of art scene, music scene.
They have farmer's markets.
Because the gays came.
That's why.
That's why.
One thing I will say, God damn it.
And if you're homophobic, I don't know why you're homophobic.
It's ridiculous to be homophobic.
I also don't know why you're listening to this.
And I don't know why you'd be listening to us because lesbians
love us, goddammit. And they do love us.
And they're great people.
Anyway, well, some of them are great people and some of them are
pricks like everybody else. Just like any other
class. There are no more
of assholes than anybody else here.
But what gays will do... I think that's the phrase.
That's the phrase. They will come into a shithole
town. Oh boy. They'll look at it.
They'll see a couple of old lofts that used to be warehouses, and they'll say, oh, this is quaint.
And then it's a fucking pudding skin shop that's like a designer thing, and there's art museums up, and next thing you know, the fucking town is thriving.
On the East Coast, so many towns have been taken over.
The main street got taken over by the gays, and it just went out and radiated into—
Art galleries fucking everywhere.
Now it's a beautiful place again and that's what happens.
Every theater that's there is fucking overhauled and amazing.
Yes, and great.
So good for you.
Yes.
If your town's a shithole, invite the gays in.
Get some gays and we'll fix it.
That's right.
People of this town, population 28,540, which is down 2.5% since 1990.
Now median age in this town, 38.9, about a year and a half older than normal.
Nothing huge.
Way higher female population, 56.24% female.
But 20% aren't interested in dudes.
I was going to say, and they're about normal on widows.
So this is not widows.
This is chicks that have no interest in dudes right here.
That's what this is here.
Lesbianville, USA.
Here they said it's five times – about five to six times higher of a gay population than the average.
Good for them.
Hey, good for you guys.
Yeah, good for you.
Married population, 38 percent, which is 12 percent lower than the average.
Because it was illegal.
It was illegal for a long time, yeah.
Well, it's not that it was – yeah because it was illegal. It was illegal for a long time. Well, it's not that it was illegal.
Yeah, it was illegal.
Well, they wouldn't count them statistically in the census as married until, what, 2008 or 10 or I believe.
Yeah, very recently.
So single population, 61%.
This is also voted in the top 10 or top 20 cities to be single.
Small cities to be single in the USA.
How about that?
Because they have tons, 61% single, which is a way higher population than anywhere else.
And you're forced to be that way.
And you're forced, yeah.
And also Smith College there, which is the other.
So, you know, that sort of thing here.
Widowed is normal.
Higher divorce rate.
I got divorced, realized I was a lesbian.
Good deal.
Good for you.
Good place to do it in.
That's right.
God damn it.
Good for you guys.
Single with no children is about normal.
So mostly normal except for those, you know – the aberrations on the marriages here.
Race of this town.
Sure.
It's about 81 percent white in this town.
Massachusetts, you expect that unless you're in a city, a big city.
2.64 percent black.
So a few black people at least.
That's good.
They're not keeping them out.
Good for you guys.
6.59 percent Asian.
OK.
So there are more Asians there.
That's good.
They like Chinese food a lot in the Northeast.
I will say that.
And everything else.
And if there's Jewish people, they keep those places open on Christmas.
That's what I'm going to say right there.
Right there.
Hispanic, 7.64%, which is lower than the average, but it's the Northeast, so you kind of expect that there.
Religion in this town, it's about 42% religious, which is 50% of the average.
So that's about what you'd expect in the Northeast.
Now I'm going to give you one guess what religion most of these people practice.
They are so Catholic.
They are Catholic.
Catholic as fuck.
Catholics.
The Baptists of the North, everybody.
Proving it once again.
32% Catholic.
0.34% LDS.
It doesn't snow quite enough there.
It's some, though.
For them to hide in there just with blue eyes peeking out. In with it doesn't snow quite enough there for them to hide
just with blue eyes peeking out
that's it right there
1.32% Jewish
that is like a
cornucopia of Jewish
people compared to normal what we have here
that's some of the highest Jewish population
we've had it's amazing good for you
guys they got Jews and gays
in this town good for you guys. They got Jews and gays in this town. Good for you guys.
And 0.10%
Muslim. So not a lot of Muslims still
though. That's not going to happen there.
They don't like the gays I think is the problem.
70% vote
Democrat in this town, which you would
about expect. That's Massachusetts.
26% are Republican.
Unemployment rate low in this
town, about 3.5%.
So thriving.
Not a bad deal at all.
There's jobs here.
Household income, median household income is $58,000, which is about $5,000 over the national average,
which, again, to be expected in the Northeast because it's kind of expensive here.
The jobs in this town are a little different than normal.
A lot of the same, but
educational services is almost 30%
because there's a college and they're
really big on education in Massachusetts
too. They put a lot of priority
into it. Their schools are always
top rated in the country.
You pay a lot of fucking taxes to schools
there. Manufacturing jobs,
about half the usual manufacturing
jobs of normal, so it's more of
a kind of a white-collar type of thing,
I would say. Cost of living in
this town, we say $100 is par,
even. Cost of living here is about
$125 out of $100,
so it's a little bit high. It's expensive. Groceries
are a little high. Utilities are a little high.
Everything's a little high. The most high, though,
is housing at $140.
It always is up there. It always is. Yeah, Northeast is tough on housing.
Oh, they're killing it.
It's super expensive.
And then the property taxes are tough there.
But your kids can go to school.
Because the market's thriving, so who gives a shit?
Yeah, your kids can go to school, which is nice.
Median home, this is interesting here.
Usually the median home age in a place is about 37 in the nation.
Here it's 67.
So a lot of older houses in the Northeast here.
Median home cost is about $260,000. So that's 67. So a lot of older houses in the northeast here. Median home cost is about $260,000.
So that's higher.
It's usually $185,000.
So that's higher here.
And that's even, it's hard to find a lot for that if I'm being.
But they're fucking beautiful.
They are nice houses.
Like 37% of the houses are between $200,000 and $300,000.
And then they kind of go from there up.
There's not a lot under that.
There really isn't.
It's not a whole lot there.
And if we have convinced you that you need to be in Northampton, Massachusetts,
we have for you the Northampton, Massachusetts Real Estate Report.
All right.
We have a two-bedroom apartment here on the average.
It looks like this might be the way to go.
$1,080.
It's about $1,095.
That's fantastic.
Which is about $75 more than the average.
Yeah, it's not awful.
That's good stuff.
Because the housing, as we'll get to, two-bedroom, one-bath, 1,600-square-foot house.
Two-bedroom, one-bath, and it needs some work, too.
It's a little rough.
$191,000 for that.
Three-bedroom, two-bath, which is fine.
960 square feet, which is not fine.
Three-bedroom?
How do you squeeze that in?
I feel like they have an addition or something that's not allowed to be counted in square feet or something on the assessor or some shit like that.
Because that's ridiculous.
It's a three-bedroom, one-bath?
Two-bath.
Two-bath.
Two-bath.
They had to have built like a master.
900 square feet?
You know they built like a master in a master bathroom.
It started out as a two in one, but $284,900 for that little slice of heaven.
And finally, if you want to stretch out a little, this is a nice brick home here.
Four bedroom, two bath, 1,800 square foot.
That's a good one.
$429,000.
Oh, boy.
It's not a good one.
So that's going to cost you.
Yeah, that's a thing.
I can't buy that.
No, no, not at all.
That's too much. Things to do in this town. Lots of things to do. Number one, be super gay. Yeah, that's a thing. I can't buy that. No, no, not at all. That's too much.
Things to do in this town.
Lots of things to do.
Number one, be super gay.
Yeah.
Be gay and enjoy it.
Fantastic.
Since 1981, Northampton has been host to an annual LGBTQ parade and pride event held the
first Saturday in May.
That's awesome.
So that's coming up.
Got it out there in May and parade yourselves away.
Also, too,
it's been home to a twice-yearly Paradise City Arts Festival
held at the three-county fairgrounds on
Memorial Day weekend and Columbus Day weekend.
It's a national juried
showcase for contemporary craft
and fine art. All right. Yes.
Not bad at all. So that seems like a...
See what I mean? It's turned into like a crafty, artsy kind of
a, hey, we're going to the art gallery type of place.
It's very snowy Tucson.
Exactly.
Yeah.
And also nice because Tucson is a complete shithole.
So crime rate here.
Crime rate, property crime, as we know.
I'm just stealing shit here.
It's just about average, like right on the money.
Violent crime, murder, rape, robbery, assault.
Yeah.
The Mount Rushmore.
Super low, right?
It's actually just
slightly above average here. Just slightly
above average. I don't know what people are fighting about,
but they're fighting about something.
We'll find out people who were fighting.
But yeah, that
surprised me too. I expected it to be lower for some
reason, but who knows. And there's a lot of towns
around there. Who knows if people from other places
are killing people in there. Not for nothing, but lesbians,
they love hard. And they
are vicious when they're angry.
They fight a lot. Well, they are women.
They fight like cats.
I think half of that we offended
everybody there, but that's okay.
We love you and lesbians love us. But they do love
hard. I've known about
19 lesbians in
my life because I live in
Phoenix. Yeah, there's a lot.
But I don't know a lot. I, there's a lot. This is a very—
But I don't know a lot.
I have known a lot here, too.
Yeah.
Fuck.
19, does that seem like a lot?
That seems low, right?
No, that seems low.
Especially in comedy.
That's a good point, too.
Point is, the ones that I've seen in relationships, when they fight, holy fuck, they leave marks.
Yeah, yeah, they fight hard.
Bruises and black eyes and shit, and then they don't come out of the house for days.
Well, yeah, because you don't have one of them being a man going, ah, I don't want to
deal with it, and walking away.
They both actually want to engage.
That's the thing.
Every argument between a man and a woman, and this is every argument, not this is an
abusive guy who wants to yell at and abuse a woman.
Every argument-
A sane man.
Any argument between two sane people, a sane man and a sane woman, the man does not want
to have the, they don't want to be there.
God, no.
If they just said, whatever, never mind, we'd go, okay, and walk away.
We don't fucking care.
It's easy.
So that's what it is.
And so let's talk about a woman here.
Let's talk about a woman, shall we?
Let's talk about a woman named Kristen Strickland.
She is born November 13th, 1967 in Fall River, Massachusetts.
Okay.
She is, so she's raised small town.
She grows up in a nice, you know, nice Massachusetts, small town, 60s, 70s.
Both her parents are together.
So there's no like, no insanity in the family, nothing like that.
She's raised by both her parents.
Sure.
Richard and Claudia Strickland, who said Dickie Strick over here.
Dick Strick.
Dick Strickland.
Dick Strickland over here.
That's a tough one.
That's a tough name, yeah.
Dick Strickland.
Dick Strickland.
You don't want anything that rhymes with Dick to be your last name if your name is Dick.
Sounds like a tire salesman.
Dick Strickland.
Good to see you.
Regional manager.
You're definitely a regional manager of anything that you do.
Something in like Wichita, I feel like. That's Dick Strickland.
Sell the most snow tires in Wichita. Good to see you. Short sleeve plaid button up with ivory snaps.
That's the one right there. And a solid color tie. That's not a good color.
A bad color is that you shouldn't be wearing that with short sleeves. That's not a good tie. What color is that? He shouldn't be wearing that with short sleeves. What is that, mauve?
That's not a good tie color.
I'll pick that out for you.
So his father was in the Coast Guard.
You want me to take it off?
I can put it on the salmon one.
He snaps it off because it's a clip-on.
I got an eggplant one and a salmon one.
He pops another one.
He's got his back pocket folded up.
Pop.
There you go.
How's that?
Just in case.
I get mustard and things all over my tie all the time i'm a disaster
so i just keep it right there here get it together dick yeah come on dick strickland jesus christ
well he was in the coast guard dick strickland oh my god we're ripping a hero oh yeah he's in
the coast guard uh he's also an electronics engineer out of that so i mean he does his
thing that sounds like a military man dick strickland that's what sergeant dick strickland
yeah buzz cut and all.
Boom. Right on the money there. And his mother
was a substitute. Her mother was a substitute teacher.
Oh, Jesus. Noble people.
This is a nice little
family in the Northeast in the 60s.
A small town. I mean,
she should grow up and have an easy life.
You know what I mean? Two and a half kids.
Two and a half kids.
She's like a nice looking.
If you came from this era and you're like a nice looking white girl that grew up with both parents, you should do well in the world.
You have no fucking excuses. Nothing.
Nothing.
You get no excuses.
The world wants you.
They're looking for you.
Back then, forget about it.
Yeah, you're good.
They wanted some girl to answer her phone and pop her bubble gum.
I was going to say, they'd probably grab your ass.
Right, right.
But you're going to work your way up.
It's not a great life, but if you can be Joanie from Mad Men and you can make this shit to
your advantage, I'm sorry that happened to you ladies.
That sucks.
That was a shit time for you guys.
It's terrible.
That's brutal.
Guys are dicks.
1974, she has a little sister.
Yeah.
So add that to the family.
She's seven years old when the little sister comes along.
Tara Morgan is her name.
Oh, that's nice, too.
So, yeah, very nice.
So now it's a nice little family with the two kids in the northeast in a nice little town.
Sure.
The town's kind of getting shittier.
That whole area was.
She didn't grow up in Northampton.
She grew up in Fall River and moved around a little bit.
Gotcha.
Now, she claims, and this is never substantiated and everybody else on earth says it's not true including her family, including
everybody that knows the family
everything. She claims her mother was
a heavy drinker and beat her
all the time as a child.
No one else saw this.
The little sister didn't see it. They didn't beat the little sister.
Nope. Never saw the mother drink.
Everybody said she wasn't a drunk. She just
makes shit up. That's the thing you're going to find
out about Kristen. Kristen likes to make some shit up. That's the thing you're going to find out about Kristen.
Kristen likes to make some shit up.
That's the first thing she would make up is just say that her mom's an alcoholic and she beat her up.
Well, that's not a good thing to make up.
No, it's not.
It's not.
Not just for like how people are going to judge your mom, but how about you don't get to just blame shit on.
No.
You know what I mean?
Like a made up.
That's ridiculous.
This is like later on. I feel like maybe this is made up that's ridiculous later on i feel
like maybe this is like later on when she was in college too i feel like maybe she was doing the uh
i don't know everybody was giving sob stories and she really has no sob story she grew up like we
said she grew up in a leafy little suburb with parents who gave a shit and actually paid attention
to her in a nice family so what's she gonna say oh yeah i had it hard too right she had to how my
mom was an alcoholic and beat me up oh i'm so sorry honey and that's you know and kids do that teenagers
do that for attention teenagers make up shit for attention all the time uh that's a terrible thing
fucking make up for attention but it is terrible uh in school she's she's amazing very high iq
yeah uh great scholastic aptitude great grades very, very high grades. She's an achiever, this one.
She is a – Why can't she just embrace being better than everybody else?
She's an achiever.
Yeah, she needs to achieve, and she's – but she's – it's not enough for her.
It's not enough for her.
She has quite the personality, this one, and we'll find out exactly what's wrong with her also,
or at least what they think is wrong with her.
Yeah.
From 1981, 1982, in that area, her family – her and the family, they moved to Groton, Massachusetts.
This is when she starts to kind of displace the little bit of behavior that's a little off.
A little bit off here.
This is after this, because this is right when she's like 14 when they move,
which a lot of kids, they get different anyway when they're around 14.
They get a little crazy. The chemicals going on in around 14. Yeah, they get a little crazy.
The chemicals going on in their body.
Yeah, it's not their fault.
It's a disaster for a few years, guys.
We get it.
We get it.
We're sorry.
Get through it.
You can do it.
And we understand that that other garbage starts happening right now.
No shit.
And that's, I'm sure, a goddamn surprise.
Yeah, all that shit, man.
I mean, you expect it.
It's coming because you've heard and read about it your whole goddamn life.
But then when it happens, it's still got to be like, oh, fuck.
Am I here already?
And this is so funny because it feels like this feel when you're when you're like a teenager, too.
It feels like this.
It'll never end.
Yeah.
It feels like that's it.
You're in high school forever.
And this is your thing.
And you have life sentence.
Yeah.
And you're in there.
And then the moment you're done with high school, like literally the second you step off the property of high school after you're done with it, you turn around and you go, that was stupid.
That's never going to think about that again.
And you move on like that never happened.
Like that was in a way, like you were in a waiting room for 15 minutes.
Like you weren't going to think about the magazines you read.
You didn't care.
You're just going to the doctor's office.
That's four years.
When you go in your first day of freshman year, I can't even imagine.
Thinking about how far away graduation day is.
Yeah.
Felt like a fucking eternity.
And it's so not.
Yeah.
It's tomorrow.
If you are this, if you are in high school, if you're a kid, I don't know if you should
be listening to this or not, but if you're cool and you can hang with this, then great.
Good for you.
It's almost over.
It's almost over.
Don't freak out.
Even if it just started.
Right there.
I promise it's almost over. You're going to blink Don't freak out. Even if it just started. Right there. I promise it's almost over.
You're going to blink and it's over.
And this won't be like, this is my everything and I'll think about this forever.
You won't.
You'll never think about it again.
No.
You'll think about the dicks that were assholes to you.
And that's it.
And you'll have like two friends that you'll talk to after that.
So most of your friends don't matter either.
You're going to learn that.
It's fun.
It's good stuff.
And you're going to realize how those kids that you thought were everything, you're going
to get out in the real world and you're going to see that those kids don't mean shit.
Nothing.
And they'll never amount to shit.
No.
They don't care.
You don't care if they do and they don't care if you do.
That's how it works.
That's the best thing, way we can describe being an adult.
Nobody cares.
Nobody gives a fuck.
Nobody cares what you're doing.
No.
Nobody cares.
God, no.
People are going to say this.
Nope.
They won't say anything because they don't care.
Nobody cares.
Nothing.
That's all over when high school ends.
We don't give a shit.
So anyway, Kristen, as a child here, as a teenager, starts to show signs that she's a pathological liar.
Her neighbors, her friends, her family, her dad says that.
She would tell her friends that she was related to Lizzie Borden, the murderer. What the fuck?
She would tell her friends that, like, it's like a cool
thing. I'm related to Lizzie Borden.
Oh, she's related to. Related, not I am her.
Oh, I thought you said she related to her.
Like, she understood her.
She's a relative of her. How do you understand that?
No, no, no. She's a family member of Lizzie Borden,
she's saying. She's not a good person to be related to.
No, but I guess if you're trying to be like a fucking
emo teenager, you know, you're like, I might have some tendencies of being a wacko too yeah
be careful of me man i'm so dark so whatever uh so put on some black lipstick that'll scare
them enough that's enough that's plenty so uh and in the 80s that would have really sent them
over the edge if you weren't wearing like a pink fucking whatever the hell you were like oh
what's wrong with this one?
All black except for something accented that's pink or neon green.
Yeah, or neon green or yellow.
Some sort of color.
And then fucking tease your hair.
You'll be all right.
Big time, yeah.
They'll love you.
Pastels.
Big pastels and bright colors.
You need neons in the late 80s.
In the mid 80s, you're going that gray and pink.
Everything was gray and pink.
Whatever.
Everything looked like Vice City, the video game.
Terrible.
Terrible, God damn it.
So people would start to, at this point, her friends,
people would start to edge away from her a little bit
once they got to know her real well because she was high maintenance.
She's a lot to deal with.
My mother beat me and was an alcoholic and this and that,
and she's lying about shit and she's making shit up
and she's saying she's related to fucking murderers.
And she's just not the type of person that after a while sane people just go, yeah, I don't need this person.
This is too much for me.
And that's the type of thing too.
And so they do.
One friend said, and this is, it's little things even.
This is the thing.
This is just a person that needs to lie.
A friend recounted how she showed up to her house.
This is just a person that needs to lie.
A friend recounted how she showed up to her house.
Kristen shows up at her house in a blouse, which her friend had noticed was missing from her closet.
It was her blouse that was missing.
She's like, where's that blouse?
And then her friend comes up wearing it.
She's like, that's odd.
She asked her about it.
Kristen insisted the blouse was hers and would not give in on it.
No, it's absolutely mine.
Wow.
She's like, I know you took it. You were here. it's gone out of my closet now you're wearing it like obviously you took it what nope
that would not fucking give in yeah so that's the type of deal that's uh it's a definite type right
there a lot of people in that situation would be like oh my god i'm so sorry or whatever you caught
me something you caught me what kind of idiot am i that i wore this around you or they try to lie
and be like i borrowed it i meant to I meant to leave a note and I forgot.
Because they would say something.
They wouldn't just be like, no, it's mine.
I bought it at the dress barn yesterday.
What are you talking about?
Like, what?
You ever lied to somebody and like, you ever lied to somebody and then didn't realize that
you were going to have a relationship with them for a while. And then now you're stuck carrying on that.
Yeah, that's a problem.
If you can't just like close to anybody.
That's a problem.
Not just like in a relationship relationship, like boy girl relationship, but like a friendship relationship.
Any sort of relationship in your life.
I've done it.
And it's fucking horrible.
Hanging out with your friends.
There's a friend of a friend.
They're like, no, come out.
We're going to the strip club.
And you're like, no, dude.
No, seriously, man.
No, man.
I'm a nurse and I work at like 4 a.m.
I got to go.
And that gets you out of that.
And then somehow he's in the next thing.
He's like, hey, how's the job?
And you're like, it's fucking fine.
People croaking on you.
You're like, what are you talking about?
I work for the.
Oh, fuck.
I told you I was a nerd.
Yeah.
No, it's tough when they die on you.
It's brutal.
Hurts my shit.
God damn it.
So now forever you have to pretend like you have medical knowledge.
Right.
So I went to a friend's party and there was a girl there that I was trying to bang.
And we were playing pool.
No, no, no.
This was so many years ago.
And I was like 21.
And we're playing pool and she sees my hand and she goes, what happened to your finger?
And then I didn't want to get into it.
And I just said it was a military grade weapon.
And then I just shot the shot.
And then she goes, you were in the military?
And I was like, no, yes.
Yeah, sure.
Will that help?
Sure.
I don't want to tell you how this happened.
I just didn't give a shit.
And then that person became bed puddle.
Oh, see, that's what happened.
You know what it was? You know what? Now I'm on bed puddle. Oh, see, that's what happened. You know what it was?
You know what?
Now I'm on bed puddle side.
You started this shit on a lie.
And you know what those puddles were?
Reminders of your dishonesty.
Every time she pissed my bed, she was going, you weren't a fucking soldier, you chicken shit.
She said, here's a liquid reminder of your dishonesty.
It never came up again, thank Christ.
But it was fucking terrifying that any time I met her family and they were like, yeah, I was in the service.
And then she'd like look at me and I was like, oh, that's nice.
Then we'd move on.
I was just panicked that they would ever ask me anything.
Oh, look, they have a military discount.
You're like, I don't need it.
I don't need it.
I'm good.
I don't want them out.
I love paying more.
I feel bad.
I don't want to do it.
I pay full price.
I don't want any special treatment.
I didn't do it for them. I just had to any special treatment. I didn't do it for my country.
I didn't do it for a discount.
I was such an idiot.
Oh, man.
I should have just told her, look, I just didn't want to tell you the story.
But then I just was like, I don't want to tell her that story either.
I just don't want to.
I don't care.
That's what it is.
I don't like you and I don't want to talk to you.
That's what you should have said.
That happened.
That later on.
After much urine was shed.
It's the fucking worst. So this
Kristen here, her boyfriends
at the time too describe her as
strange and very controlling.
Very controlling and
manipulative and that sort of thing.
She would fake suicide. Oh
Jesus. She's one of those people that would say
She's a bitch. Yeah, I'm going's one of those people that would say. She's a bitch.
Yeah, I'm going out that night and she'd say, well, I'm taking, I just took all these pills or something.
What a monster.
And she wouldn't actually do this.
Of course not.
She's manipulative.
And we say bitch and we mean asshole and the same thing.
She's a female asshole.
And this is the thing.
When we have a guy, when we have a guy killer, we say, what a dick, what an asshole, whatever, blah, blah, blah.
Because those are just whatever words.
If we call her a bitch, we don't mean it's not a gender thing.
No, she's just a bitch.
She's being a bitch.
I'm sorry.
Objectively, that's being a bitch.
Me telling Bedbottle that just to get out of that story, I was being a bitch.
That's what I was being.
Yes, you were being a bitch.
Exactly.
Perfect. Now, so were being a bitch. Exactly.
Perfect.
Now, so she's faking suicide.
She would tamp.
She'd fuck with people's cars, like her boyfriend's cars when she was mad at them.
Oh, that kind of bitch.
Yeah.
Fucking crazy person.
Just a crazy person.
Fucking whatever.
She's faking suicide.
Tamp.
Pissed off.
She'd go fuck with your car.
She would physically attack them.
She'd scratch them. She's a scratcher. She's a nightmare. She's aaking suicide, pissed off. She'd go, fuck with your car. She would physically attack them. She'd scratch them.
She's a scratcher.
She's a nightmare.
She's a nightmare person, just an awful person that anybody would just edge away from.
But some people need chaos. They're attracted to crazy.
They need it.
They grew up with it, and they need it, and they're attracted to that, and it's so weird.
This started from just being seven, and then all of a sudden she's not all the attention in the house?
That's possible.
Also, I think she moved when she was like 14, which I moved across the country when I was 14 and I moved a lot when I was a kid.
So when you go to a new school, it's a super weird thing and it fucks your brain up, I think, a little bit.
And I think that might have fucked with her a little too.
When she moved, she had to be – I don't know if maybe she moved and then she wasn't as popular maybe as she was before.
So then she had to make shit up and then you start reaching and you start.
But I feel like it's deeper than that.
It's got to be more deep seed.
And we'll probably find out.
She has like diagnosable psychological problems.
So part of it has to come from that, though.
The sister coming then.
It's got to be.
Especially if it's a sister.
She was a baby and everybody doted on her.
And then all of a sudden there's a new little girl.
Yeah, but they're always very proud of her because she's very smart and she's pretty
and she's always very proud of, she makes her parents proud.
And she makes, everybody thinks she's going to do great things in the world.
She graduates at 16 years old from high school.
Jesus.
A year and a half early.
That's impressive.
Three semesters early she graduates.
That is very impressive.
High honors also.
So you graduate early and with high honors.
That's incredible.
I need these credits and I'm getting out.
She did it like the right way.
Right away after that, she enrolls in Bridgewater State College with a major in pre-med.
That's 16 years old she's doing this.
That's 16 years old.
Yeah.
She's doing some Doogie Howser shit right here.
Not quite.
I think he was 11 or something. But still, 16-med sidestepped fifth grade i think he's yeah
that was a little different yeah he also it was a tv show she's doing this shit he said fuck i don't
i can either watch the berenstein bears or go to fucking or go to medical school i think i'm gonna
just go to medical school i'm bored fucking whatever school he went to the bears were doing
something right you know already i think he went went to Johns Hopkins in the little newspaper articles in the beginning.
Probably. I think you're right.
I don't remember what it was.
I think you're right.
It sounds right.
I think you're right.
They needed to put in the headline.
Well, they had to put a school that people know is a medical school in the headline.
Also one that's incredibly impressive medical school.
But like Duke Medical School is a great medical school.
But in 1988 when that came out, they couldn't put Duke Medical School because people go, what the fuck is Duke?
I don't even know what that is.
But they knew Johns Hopkins.
So anyway, I think he went to Johns Hopkins.
Maybe.
Anyway, she's going here.
She is a less smart Doogie Howser.
Doogie Howser with a head injury.
And she continues on her verbal and physical abuse of her boyfriends and ex-boyfriends.
It doesn't matter.
She's 17 years old.
She's wild.
She'll go after you.
She'll fuck up your car.
She has some incidents in college here.
In 1984, she leaves an ex-boyfriend a note, an ex-boyfriend,
a note saying that she'd eaten glass to die.
She tried to kill herself.
She's eaten glass, and she's going to die, and it's all your fault.
That's the way you choose it?
Eaten glass?
There's never been a suicide
that did that. No, I'm sure there has been
a glass eating suicide.
It seems like... I don't believe it.
You'd have to be on mushrooms or some shit for that
for you to think that's a good idea.
I also don't believe anybody ever ate a Tide Pod.
I don't believe that at all.
They have by accident.
There hasn't been one fucking victim on the news.
I think it all came from 4chan or some shit like that.
Some silly shit like that.
Reddit, whatever the fuck.
It never happened.
Like 10 years ago, kids were eating Tide Pods.
Like small children thought they were candy because they looked like desserts.
I don't believe it.
That I believe.
I don't believe it at all.
That's 100%.
There was kids dying.
That was a true thing.
It was on the news. This kid died from eating a Tide Pod. I don't believe it. So they believe. I don't believe it at all. That's 100%. I'm out. There was kids dying. I don't believe it. That was a true thing. I don't believe it.
It was on the news.
This kid died from eating a Tide Pod.
No, I don't believe it.
So they had to put warnings all over it.
Because I remember at the time, my ex-wife, now my ex-wife, saying, you got to put the
Tide Pods up high because kids eat the Tide Pods.
And I said, our kids are not stupid enough to eat fucking detergent.
I remember telling her, they're not that stupid.
She was like, my son at the time was like four or five.
He might do it.
I was like, well, then you know what? I don't know. He's not long my son at the time was like four or five. He might do it. I was like, well then you know what?
I don't know.
He's not long for this world.
I'm sorry,
but he's going to have
to survive in the world
if he can't not eat detergent.
We got fucking problems here.
I don't think anybody ever did.
Just because it's fucking
brightly colored.
Doesn't look like ice cream.
Jesus.
Have you ever eaten food
that came from above
the washing machine?
No, you haven't.
Exactly.
Fuck.
So this guy actually went and like, you know, filed a report and shit, like tried to, you
know, call somebody to help her and all that sort of thing.
But it turns out she was completely fine and lied about the whole thing.
It was just manipulating her.
Police showed up at her house and she was like, what are you talking about?
I don't know what you mean here.
I don't even have any glass on the house.
Yeah.
So the state, the officials at Bridgewater State College ordered her to receive psychiatric
treatment after that.
Oh, shit.
After the fake suicide attempt and all that.
And so she ended up leaving there not too far after leaving that college.
It got reported to the school.
Going to Greenfield Community College.
Yeah, because she lived on campus.
She was 17 years old, for Christ's sake.
She was a fucking minor.
She was a minor.
Yeah.
So, yeah, it's very, very interesting here.
So her threat to eat glass landed her ass at community college.
Landed her ass in community college because she was acting like a fucking nut.
All that work through high school, she could have just slacked and gone through high school and been at a fucking community college.
She could have got a C fucking minus and failed a couple of things and smoked weed between periods and she'd end up in the exact same place.
And she could have told everyone she wanted
that she's eating glass and no one cares.
And community college are like,
we have people here that are eating glass as a snack,
not to kill themselves.
They just are too stupid to know not to eat the snack.
And they're too broke.
Yeah, that's the other thing.
Otherwise they'd be at a mainstream university.
There you go.
So another, an affidavit here from another ex-boyfriend
said that she was mentally unstable
and in his thing he said he, quote,
would not be surprised if she killed or abused someone.
Jesus.
Another former boyfriend said that she damaged his car after he,
it's fucking nuts, man, after she did something she didn't like.
We'll talk about that more specifically later.
Also, tons of people reported getting phone calls from her
accusing them of, quote, stabbing her in the back.
She's one of those people.
Everyone's out to get me.
You're stabbing me in the back, and you're doing this,
and you told this one, and they're like,
what are you talking about?
Go eat some glass.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
Jesus Christ.
You know who would have strained her right the fuck out?
She would have just had a black mother.
A black mom would have knocked the fuck out of her.
Oh, God. That's what she needed. She needed a black mother. A black mom would have knocked the fuck out of her. Oh, God.
That's what she needed.
She needed a, yeah, she did.
She needed to be adopted by a black woman at age 17.
I wish her dad was into black women and just created a much better little girl.
That would have been great.
Yeah, that's what we need there.
That's true.
So, yeah, so she ends up transferring in 87 to Greenfield Community College.
Also, she was, first it was Wachusett Community College and then she transferred to Greenfield Community College.
So who the fuck knows what was going on in these places.
So in the summer of 86, this is the only reason why she may have switched schools because this school was closer to a guy that she met named Glenn Gilbert.
In 86, they begin to get serious and date.
He has no idea.
And he's named Glenn.
Glenn Gilbert.
Double G.
Glenn Gilbert over here.
Just makes me think of the wire with Double G that got shot by Ziggy there in the warehouse
because he wouldn't give him his fucking camera money.
Hey, you know what?
You don't fuck people over like that.
Maybe they don't go out to their stolen Mercedes and get a gun and shoot you a bunch of times
and then go sit in the car and wait for the cops.
Maybe that doesn't happen.
Sometimes it happens.
It happens sometimes.
At least once on a TV show.
At least once on the wire.
Double G got shot in his damn warehouse for camera money.
So 1987, later in the year, this is after she graduates.
She graduates the nursing program.
She takes a job as a home health aide
with the Visiting Nurses Association of Franklin County.
This is her first serious issue.
There is a problem, and I'm going to tell you this.
This is out of documents.
This is not my wording,
but she apparently, quote,
used bathwater to scold a retarded child over 60% of his body.
Oh, my God.
Horrible monster thing to do.
Wow.
Got angry at him for something.
Sweet fucking Pete.
I can't imagine.
That right there is as bad as you can do.
You got angry at a mentally challenged child, so you scold them with hot water over 60% of their body.
That's fucking bananas.
She was not prosecuted for that.
What?
Not prosecuted.
How?
I have no fucking idea.
This is in 1987, and the records are spotty.
She said she spilled it on accident or some shit.
She said she spilled it, or if she was young and they felt bad for her.
Back then, still mentally challenged.
They'd still just put people in a fucking room.
So I think they were just like, yeah, we know.
They can be crazy. They can be a handful of those retards. You've got to burn. Yeah. I mean, so I think they were just like, yeah, we know. Yeah, they can be crazy.
They can be a handful of retards.
You got to burn them sometime.
Like, I feel like maybe that's what they said.
Like, as bad as that is.
Sometimes just splash hot water on them.
Fuck, man.
Figure it out.
I'll bet that kid won't fuck up next time.
Next time he's not going to do that.
So January 88.
Even a retard knows when hot water's hot.
God damn it.
Yeah.
What the fuck, man?
That was her defense, by the way.
No, I don't know what that was. So January 1988, Glenn marries her. Yeah. What the fuck, man? That was her defense, by the way. No, I don't know what that was.
So January 1988, Glenn marries her.
Okay.
So yeah, you have a woman burning children.
You want to lock that down.
Sometimes crazy is fucking good.
It's good.
Sometimes crazy is good.
To Glenn, apparently it was.
I think Glenn likes this sort of thing.
She changes her name to Kristen Gilbert at that point.
So that's what she'll go by from now on, Kristen Gilbert.
February of 88, a month after they're married, she chases Glenn around the house with a butcher knife after an argument.
Yes, the police are called.
It's an ugly scene.
Whoops-a-daisy, Glenn.
Whoops.
You made a mistake.
A month later.
Like, oh, boy.
Wow.
We just got home from the honeymoon.
Crazy doesn't hide long.
No.
That's true.
No, it doesn't hide.
It'll pop its head out.
Whoa, hey, what are you doing over there?
Crazy lets you know it's crazy real fast.
It pops up and says, hey, are you looking over there?
What are you doing?
What do you got there?
Like a jag in the box.
Every argument is a turn of that crank.
You never know.
And then it could take three arguments.
Sometimes it just takes two.
You know the suitcases were still packed from the honeymoon.
They were still sitting on the stairs.
Still had the bridegroom tags. Yeah, They're still sitting on the stairs. Still on the bridegroom tags.
Yeah, they're still sitting on the stairs, man.
She hasn't even watched the laundry yet.
Nope.
And so, again, she's chasing him around with a butcher knife.
May 88, she gets her license as a registered nurse.
Yeah.
And so she's a registered nurse.
They gave her what?
Yes.
They gave her an RN license.
Bad little incident back there.
Come on.
Like I said, who hasn't burned a retarded kid a couple of times in their life?
A butcher's knife.
Yeah.
I knew it.
Come on.
I mean, that wasn't on the test.
That wasn't on her RN review.
Have you chased your husband with a butcher knife recently?
If yes, you're disqualified.
I don't think that was on there.
They just let her go.
This is nuts.
This is crazy. March 6th, 1989, she gets a job at the Leeds Veterans Affair Medical Center in Northampton,
Massachusetts.
She is featured in a magazine, VA Practitioner.
This is a veterans hospital.
These are all veterans, or relatives of veterans, that sort of thing.
VA Practitioner Magazine in April 1990.
She's featured in it.
Wow.
So I don't know what kind of publication that is.
It wasn't going to be good housekeeping.
She can't cook for shit.
She spills the water and she chases you with the butcher knife.
VA Practitioner magazine.
That's a very, very-
Very specific.
Super slim audience for that one.
I don't see that being widely circulated.
I don't know.
Maybe.
All right.
So, I mean, at this point, too,
to her fellow workers, she's being featured in a magazine
for her competency. To her fellow workers,
they think she's really committed to this
and they're impressed with her
abilities. She's the type of co-worker
they say who would remember birthdays.
She'd be the one organizing the gift exchange
during the holidays. I'm doing the Secret Santa.
She's that. They called
her the social butterfly of the Sea Ward.
She was just, everyone loved her.
Crazy doesn't hide.
The what ward?
The Sea Ward.
Yeah.
Exactly.
And that's great, too.
It's perfect that she was.
She's on the Sea Ward.
You ruined it.
Damn it.
I had that set up so well.
No, no, no.
I'm glad you caught it, though.
I did so hard.
Yeah.
Because I had like.
That's perfect. Three minutes from now, I had it set up beautifully. Damn it. That you caught it, though. I did so hard. Yeah, because I had like... That's perfect.
Three minutes from now, I had it set up beautifully.
Damn it, that's all right, though.
You hit it.
You can still hit it.
Hey, you know what?
I'm just happy someone hit it.
I don't give a shit.
Whether it's you or me, it doesn't matter.
Who hits the joke is not the point.
As long as there's laughs, I don't give a fuck where they're coming from.
Put it that way.
It doesn't matter to me.
So I'm glad you hit it.
They rated her nursing, like in her performance reviews, highly skillful was what they wrote on there.
They noted how well she reacted during emergencies.
I mean, they said she was great.
They just couldn't be more impressed with her, man.
So as soon as she hits the time clock, she gets it all together.
That's it.
She's in there.
She's an achiever.
In school, that was the thing.
She could get it all together and focus her energies to get great grades and do that.
She does the same thing here.
She studies.
She knows what she's doing.
She's efficient.
She's good.
I'm not familiar with this kind of brain damage.
You know what I mean?
This is a different thing.
We're not used to this on this show.
No.
This imbalance is so strange.
If they've got a chemical imbalance, it's a chemical imbalance.
I like that all the time.
Usually it's like, well, yeah, his dad hit him in the head every day when he was a kid,
so of course he's going to snap.
Of course he's got problems.
Yeah, with this.
This is so bizarre.
1991, she has a son.
Well, her and Glenn, but she has the son named Brian.
Okay.
So 1991, she has a son.
So now she's got a kid.
She comes back from maternity leave and switches her shift.
She was working day shift before this.
Now she switches to the four to midnight shift.
I don't know if that's easier for child care, which I assume it would be because if her husband works days, he gets home.
She goes to work.
She goes to work.
Exactly.
That way they don't have to pay for child care.
It's a rotation.
Exactly.
So I feel like maybe that's what the deal was probably for convenience.
Tag team.
Tag team.
Exactly. You have to do it. And that's when I first had my first daughter. That's what the deal was, probably for convenience. Yeah. Tag team. Tag team. Exactly.
You have to do it.
And that's when I first had my first daughter.
That's what we did, too.
I watched her during the day and I waited tables at night.
Dude, that'll fuck you up, though.
Oh, I didn't sleep.
Right.
Four to midnight, you go to bed at two in the morning.
I get home from waiting tables at one o'clock in the morning.
I can't go right to sleep.
No.
You're in bed by two, two thirty.
Yeah, even three.
Yeah.
Six a.m.
I'm buff with the kids.
Fuck, already?
How fast does 6 come?
I get home and then I'm waiting tables again.
Yeah, I go, I slept probably about the same amount as I sleep now.
Jesus Christ.
This show is like a newborn.
That's what it is.
These shows are, we've had two children, Jimmy.
Look at us.
We're proud poppas.
I'm the most neglectful dad ever.
That's awesome.
Just go with James.
I'll see you.
That's all right.
You show up and take him somewhere on the weekend. I'll see you on Saturday. That's awesome. Just go with James. I'll see you. That's all right. You show up and take him somewhere on the weekend.
I'll see you on Saturday.
That's fine.
Yeah.
You show up, you take him out to Dave and Buster's on a Saturday.
It's no problem.
Go with James.
I've got my own family.
So, oh, Jesus.
So, she comes back to the C ward.
Yeah.
She comes back to Ward C, we'll call it.
Now, when she comes back, it's an odd thing.
She goes from, she's still rated as competent and people are saying she's competent.
But all of a sudden, there's an unusually large number of deaths in the four to 12 shift.
What the fuck?
Going on.
Just an unusually large number.
Just like this is an aberrant number of deaths.
It seems like murder
time yeah or you know like it's a mischievous behavior yeah out on the street but if when they
if they come in and they have the flu weird right then again they're like well you know it's numbers
who knows so you know i mean maybe just who knows what can happen i mean everybody might die one
week who the fuck knows what's gonna happen i mean i picture people dying between the 12 and 12 and
7 shift that happens too but that's midnight to 7 a. I picture people dying between the 12 and 7 shift. That happens too.
The midnight to 7 a.m. shift.
It's just a lot on this shift more than normal.
People only die on the 4 to 12 now, which is an odd thing.
That's strange.
One doctor actually refused to let Kristen treat any of his patients anymore.
He said, I don't want her doing it.
She's whatever.
But they would die so much in her care.
But at the time, they're not thinking she's killing people or anything like that.
They think it's like they're they're like joking.
They're breaking her balls about her co-workers.
They call her the angel of death in a joking way. Like, here comes the angel of death over here.
Nurses are sick.
They are.
No, it's a good thing.
They need to be.
Yeah.
And so they always say to sensitize themselves.
It's true.
The David Simon Homicide Detective book. He talks about there's a weird, just a weird synergy between homicide detectives and like
midnight shift nurse, emergency room nurses.
They've seen some shit.
They have the sickest senses of humor.
They're the most cynical.
They're the most fuck everything.
Everybody's a pain in the ass.
Everybody's dead, dying or a criminal.
Like, so they have a certain thing with that.
But so they're all breaking her balls
dark sense of humor they call her the angel of death she's like yeah haha whatever yeah
geez you know and i'm sure they felt bad for her too at the same time sure but uh as they started
dying here it was tripling the rate of deaths over the previous three years oh boy that's a lot it's
not just a little bit it's like 20 more deaths this is triple okay uh but she also was a calm calm competent person that
yeah people thought so they didn't suspect her or anything like that sure uh valentine's day 1992
february 14th 1992 there's a bomb threat uh in the uh in the uh va hospital here uh there's a
she claimed she received the bomb threat at the hospital, and then afterwards, she found a strange box after police found nothing.
They evacuate the ward for hours.
They evacuate all the patients, all the people.
It's like in school when there's a bomb threat.
You're sitting out there for two hours as they go through everything.
They were doing that.
Police found nothing.
They're telling veterans that there's a bomb threat on the hospital.
Those guys are losing their fucking minds.
They're out.
Guys who haven't walked in 10 years are sprinting toward the door going, I'm good.
I'll take the stairs.
No problem.
Absolutely.
So the police search the whole place, find nothing.
She finds a strange box afterwards.
So that's like, oh, the whole bomb unit and nobody found shit.
Yeah.
And this is like professionals.
And they're investigating it.
This is a federal building.
So they're not.
This isn't like the local cops came in and looked around and said, I don't see nothing.
They came in with a team and this is a serious deal.
You can't threaten with a bomb, a federal building.
People freak the fuck out.
Sure.
Even pre-Oklahoma City.
Sure.
They'd still freak the hell out.
So that ended up happening.
So they were a little like, that's weird.
You found a box and the cops didn't.
Very strange.
November 13th, 1993, she gives birth to a second son, Raymond, and this is on her birthday.
So that's how much of a narcissist she is.
She pushed this kid out on her birthday.
She willed this kid out on her fucking birthday.
I know it.
She induced on her own birthday.
You know it, man.
So 1994, she meets james perrault uh he's a
security guard at the hospital and they become friends he works the 3 to 11 shift she works the
4 to 12 they go and have drinks with the co-workers at the end of their shift and uh he's the guy he's
a security guard whenever there's a ward c emergency medical emergency uh he's the one that's
called in to like stand there
and do whatever the fuck.
I don't know.
He's working security.
I don't know what he's doing.
Keep people out of the room.
Keep people away.
Sure.
But we'll call it that.
Yeah.
So it's not too long before they start having an affair.
Okay.
Obviously.
Yeah.
You know, obviously.
She, he was impressed with during these emergencies.
What a great nurse she was.
She'd snap into action and know what to do and do shit.
And he's like, man, she's got skills, this girl.
And so they're impressing each other.
He's impressing her with his skills of standing there.
Sure.
So it's good.
Holding down this hospital linoleum.
Yeah.
This linoleum right here ain't moving.
I don't care what her Katrina could come through.
This linoleum's staying put because it's under my feet.
Right.
Secure.
I got a GED.
Yeah.
It's a thing.
And people, the other nurses would start to notice that as there's like, you know,
people are dying and she's trying to save them and everyone's trying to save them,
she would like, they'd like exchange flirty glances and shit.
Oh, my God.
That's creepy as fuck.
Creepy times, yeah.
In between chest compressions, she's rubbing her nipple or some shit.
Yeah, she's like, what's up, baby?
Yeah, she'll give him a little wink.
Like, yeah, I'm going to get this old guy.
As soon as I get the stink of old dead man off of me, as soon as I get the smell of old veteran off of me, I'll be.
I'm going to blow you in a mop closet.
Yeah.
Quote, here's one here from some affidavits.
Quote, one witness will testify that he observed Gilbert playing footsie with Peralt during the middle of a code.
Jesus.
Another witness will testify that Gilbert touched Peralt affectionately during the middle of a code.
In the middle of this shit.
It's party time.
There's somebody fucking that can't breathe.
When those lights start going off and shit's coming, she thinks that's a strobe light and she's at the club.
And it's time to fuck.
She's like, woo, yeah, somebody, yeah, tequila shots.
Let's go.
She takes her shirt off.
She's swinging around.
The ecstasy and orange juice.
What the fuck is going on with this lady, man?
Put that security guard's finger in my ass.
Jesus Christ.
What the fuck?
I'm fucking real.
This is bananas.
Hospital regulations called for Peralt to perform CPR upon doctor's request during codes.
And they said that Kristen Gilbert here would wipe his brow as he was doing it and shit like that.
Like he's a doctor in surgery.
This is so weird.
They noticed, the co-workers said they noticed her,
she would slip away at times from her shift to spend time with him.
Sure.
She would hurry through her duty so she could meet him
as soon as the shift let out at midnight.
She wanted to go right over and see him for a while and shit like that.
After a little while of this, you know, you would notice your wife see him for a while and shit like that. After a little while of this,
you would notice your wife not coming home
till late and things like that.
Security guard semen on her face.
You know, that sort of thing.
Walkie-talkie indentations all over.
It's like,
what's up with that?
That is clearly a walkie-talkie that you've got pressed against
your chest there. I don't know how you get a
walkie-talkie tip now. That's against your chest there. I don't know how you get a walkie-talkie tit now.
That's a little odd.
I can see it happening.
Absolutely.
It says Motorola backward on your left tit.
What is that?
Why is that?
There's something amiss here.
Also around this time when he started to notice this, he started to notice that the food she
would make him had an odd taste to it.
Oh, no.
Nothing would ever be proven about this, but he was convinced that she was trying to poison him,
and she would tell friends that she wanted him dead by Thanksgiving.
Or he would tell friends that, I think my wife wants me dead by Thanksgiving.
So the marriage starts to have a lot of problems.
And that takes a lot for Glenn.
Glenn's a patient guy.
He's okay with her burning retarded kids being chased by a butcher knife.
She's cheating on him.
She's trying to poison him.
This guy is an understanding cat. He's an
unbelievable dude. If he's not okay
with it. And he puts up with all of that
long enough to impregnate her twice.
Yeah. Well, imagine in between all this craziness
there's probably a lot of just craziness. Everyday
craziness. The sex, I guarantee you, is
fucking amazing. It has to be.
It's amazing.
Yeah, that's why she is.
It will blow your fucking mind, James.
It will blow your mind.
Just watching it.
You said that like I need to go hunt down Kristen Gilbert.
You wouldn't even have to touch yourself.
Just watching it, you would finish.
I guarantee it.
You'd be like, how did that even happen?
No.
Jesus Christ, man.
So the security guard, Peralt here,ames uh presents her with an ultimatum yeah
says that uh either you leave your husband or we're done basically i don't want any part of
this bullshit anymore and i don't blame the guy and uh she immediately leaves her husband
and her two sons with her husband and moves into an apartment close to glenn wow uh and then they
you know they can continue their affair.
I'm sorry, Peralta and James.
So their affair blossoms from there, obviously, because that's what's going to happen.
Sure.
Now, December 1994, Kristen offers a vial of epinephrine.
I believe that's how you said it.
How you say epinephrine.
Okay.
Epinephrine to a fellow nurse who suffered from asthma.
Epinephrine is like an adrenaline.
Blood thinner, right?
It's an adrenaline and it helps with asthma.
It helps with there's a bunch of different things it helps with.
And so that was an odd thing.
So do you want a vial of this?
Like, why do you have vials of drugs?
Why do you have that?
Why are you taking vials from the hospital?
So that started to get people suspicious because there was a lot of missing vials from the locked drug cabinet that had been coming up.
So now they're like, that's funny.
She offered me a vial.
No one else has offered me a vial.
Yeah.
And there's a bunch of missing shit.
That's super, super fucking weird.
Yeah.
It gets weirder.
On August 21st, 1995, Stanley Jagodowski, who is a 66-year-old man, he's a retired truck
driver and a veteran of the Korean War, this fucking guy.
He fought the Koreans for fuck's sake.
He dies from a cardiac
arrest at 66.
Now people, patients
report hearing him say
right before this, ow, ow, ow,
you're killing me.
Him screaming this out.
Kristen Gilbert was seen entering Jagodowski's
room with a syringe before that.
Oh, my God.
Okay.
He hadn't been ordered to take any IV medication.
There's nothing she should have been shooting into him.
Soon afterwards, he goes into cardiac arrest.
Oh, boy.
And he dies the next day.
Wow.
So the Koreans couldn't fucking kill this guy.
But she apparently might have had something to do with it.
May have.
We'll find out.
We'll find out.
But this broad does.
She apparently might have had something to do with it. May have.
We'll find out.
We'll find out.
Now, November 5th, 1995, she attempts to kill Glenn by poisoning him with potassium.
Here's the other thing, real quick.
This is fucking crazy.
There's a guy that's been in the Korean War screaming, ow, ow, ow, you're killing me.
That might be.
And then we fast forward more dates.
No.
What the fuck?
Why isn't she arrested?
He's an old guy.
She could have said, I went in there to adjust his thing.
And he said, who knows?
He was out of it.
Who knows?
I'm sure she's getting good at this.
Glenn's hospitalized for gastroenteritis.
And basically, he's diagnosed with having unusually low levels of potassium and glucose in his blood.
And this caused him for his heart to beat irregularly.
And so he discharged.
He got discharged from the hospital.
And it's weird because she kept complaining.
Kristen kept complaining to everybody that would listen that her husband had been released without a follow-up potassium level blood test.
She's going crazy.
But she tried to kill this fucking guy.
They end up thinking later that this was setting the stage for the attempted murder.
Like, his potassium levels are super low and they didn't even test it.
He's going to die from this.
Oh, no.
So she raises a stink about it.
Yeah.
What did she give him?
She gave him, I guess, poisoning with potassium, which I guess makes it drop.
It makes your body release it?
I don't know if it makes it release it or stop producing it or what the story is with
it.
Which makes your potassium levels drop.
Apparently it's not good for this.
Yeah.
Right after this, soon after this, in the next couple of weeks, she came home from work.
Kristen comes home from work with two syringes and comes over to her house, his house, with two syringes filled with clear odorless liquid.
clear odorless liquid.
She told Glenn that she wanted to take a blood sample and
take it back to the veterans place for
additional potassium level testing over here.
She said that she
would first have to inject him with saline to flush
the vein.
As she was injecting
it, his arms and chest started to
become numb, so he tried to pull away.
She tried to pin him against the wall with her hip to continue injecting him.
Oh, my God.
He briefly lost consciousness.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, but came to and ended up being okay.
Long enough to punch her in the mouth?
He got out of it and was out of it and ended up being all right after that.
Yeah, right.
You should have just been forearm blasting her at that point.
I don't trust you.
You're trying to kill me.
This woman is tough.
She's rough, this one.
She explained away the incident by telling him that he had fainted at the sight of the
needle.
She's like, I don't know what happened.
I took the needle out and you just got all squirrely and just fucking got, I don't know.
I pinned you against the wall so you wouldn't fall down.
Literally, I was holding you up so I didn't want you to hit your head.
He's like, oh boy, I guess.
These people are buying her bullshit.
It's one of those things. She's a smart, good-looking girl who seems to have her shit together, boy, I guess. These people are buying her bullshit. It's one of those things.
She's a smart, good-looking girl who seems to have her shit together.
It was a nurse.
You're like, I guess she's doing this.
I can't blame him.
And now he didn't attempt, he didn't report this to the cops until way later on once they were involved in a child custody dispute and all that kind of shit.
Yeah.
She says she was just trying to draw blood and it was just him having a fainting episode.
Silly guy.
Jeez.
So November 1995.
Fuck, man.
James Peralt rents an apartment that's very close to her so he can be closer to her.
The same month she moves even to a closer apartment complex to him to get closer.
And like we said, at this point, the kids are with Glenn, which is an odd thing.
It's strange.
I don't know if it's for hours or whatever it is here.
This is so weird.
December 8th, 1995, a patient at the hospital, a 35-year-old man named Henry Hudson.
He is an Air Force assistant physical therapist.
He was.
He's also a schizophrenic.
Oh, boy.
And he was admitted to the ward for the flu.
And his condition was stable until the 4 p.m. shift started.
Interesting.
Gilbert gets in here and he ends up suffering four cardiac arrests while she's on duty.
Oh, Jesus.
And he ends up dying.
Of course.
And it's horrible.
He's got a mother and a sister and all this.
And apparently because he's a schizophrenic, his mother was basically a doctor called his mother and said your son is gone yeah
and she said okay that's fine and she said no problem and she hung up because she was like i'll
be there because this happens all the time he's gone he would take off because he's schizophrenic
we don't know where he went blah blah blah she's like oh boy great put gary on the phone then his
other personality yeah and so once like if he got new medication he would it would take a while
before it would kick in and so he would be wack, and then he'd be okay once his medication kicked in.
She didn't understand he was dead.
No.
She said she would normally go try to pick—she'd go find him on the road and pick him up and be like,
come on, and she'd take him back to the hospital.
She just said, fine, thank you for calling and hung up on the guy.
They called her right back, and they said, you know, don't hang up, please.
You know, and she said—
We're here to notify next of kin, ma'am.
Yeah.
And she says, quote, well, you are.
Well, you said so already.
I'll get him food or whatever he needs and needs.
And I'll try to get it back to you.
Try to get him back to you.
Don't worry about it.
And then the guy said, no, I mean, he's gone like he's dead.
And she was a little surprised that she didn't expect that.
Now, at this point, some of the nurses start monitoring the drugs that would cause cardiac
arrest. They're starting to try to put this shit together. And a penadrine, what did I call it?
Epinephrine. Epinephrine. I'm like, that's not right. Epinephrine, that's the one that keeps
constantly coming up missing. Other nurses, they notice there's less epinephrine than there should
be. It's an adrenaline is what it is, a hormone.
What they do is it's to increase blood flow to muscles and that sort of thing for output of the heart,
pupil dilation, blood sugar.
It's that sort of shit.
It's anaphylaxis, cardiac arrest.
You can treat with this.
Got it.
And also asthma, but it's not very effective for asthma, but people do it for asthma sometimes.
Now, side effects of this include shakiness, anxiety, and sweating, and a fast heart rate and high blood pressure may occur.
Occasionally, it may result in an abnormal heart rhythm.
So it's that sort of thing. So too much of it would make your heart go way too fast and fucking explode.
Yes.
sort of thing. So too much of it would make your heart go way too fast and
explode. Yes. So December
20th, 1995,
Kristen files for divorce from Glenn.
Probably the best day of his goddamn life.
Yeah, no doubt. January 22nd,
1996, Kristen is assigned
to the care of a Thomas
Callahan. He's 60 years old. He's in the
ICU. And at
745, he screamed that he felt
like he was going to die.
His heart rate rose to 240 beats per minute, and his blood pressure was extremely elevated for 15 minutes.
That's not good.
No, and then he stabilized.
Now, two nurses found three used epinephrine vials in a needle disposal bucket in the ICU
after the cardiac emergency.
So she just disposes that shit in the biohazard jug?
Yep, she threw it out.
And later on, someone testified, or later on an expert said that that could very easily
be explained, his heart rate and all that, by an epinephrine dose.
February 2nd, 1996, she asks if she could leave work early if a very ill patient were to die.
Okay.
She's like, if that guy dies, can I leave early?
Like that sort of thing.
I've had enough of this.
40 minutes later.
They're dead.
Kenneth Cutting, who is a blind guy with multiple sclerosis, is dead.
Oh, Jesus.
Is fucking dead.
How many bad hands can that guy be dealt?
Dude, one too many.
This being in this lady's care.
At this point, 63 people have died in the last year and a half in this ward 37 of them while she was there wow that's
way that's too many that is way too many here it's way over half yeah that is way over half
now this patient was uh this kenny cutting was his name uh like we said 41 year old guy with ms
also ms lost his eyesight loose eyesight, use of his limbs.
He had sepsis, and he was in the ICU for sepsis.
He's an Army veteran.
He has a wife and a son.
This poor guy.
Two days after that, just the 4th of February, she's working.
Kristen is working as the nurse for an Angelo Vela, a 65-year-old former Marine.
She was supposed to flush his IV
with saline, but
he screamed that whatever she injected him
with burned. His heart rate increased
to 300 beats per minute, and he went into
cardiac arrest. After he stabilized,
he told the other nurses that she had
injected something into his IV. That's good.
All of this, she's still working.
Nobody's stopping this woman. Coming back
every day for her shift of February 15th, 96.
An AIDS patient who's being treated with antibiotics suddenly passes out after Kristen flushed his IV lines.
And the nurses on, at this point, they say, okay, what the fuck?
Yeah.
The nurses actually, the nurses themselves now go to the superiors together.
Good.
Three of them go.
John Wall, Kathy Ricks, and Renee Walsh come forward about the accusations against her,
and police start to investigate her now.
Maybe they're being judgmental, right?
No.
Maybe, right?
It's possible.
Yeah.
You know how many people have died on her watch?
350.
Holy shit.
That is triple the average that have died.
Yes, since she's been working there.
350 people.
That is triple the average. Triple. I'll's been working there. Three hundred fifty people. That is triple the average triple.
I'll even give you a double on an aberration.
I'll give you a triple.
That's that's a fuckload of people.
Yeah.
So February the 18th, 1996, a patient named Edward Squira.
He's a 68 year old man.
He's admitted to the hospital to treat his alcoholism uh he didn't
you know doesn't know kristen obviously here he's a world war ii veteran yeah has a wife and
children and family and all that world war ii veteran he fought nazis this fucking man okay
uh so he's admitted to the icu he's stable without any choice of his own mind no they just told him
you're fighting nazis okay sure uh and so
he gets in there he's stable about an hour before her shift starts at 507 p.m she's been on her
shift for an hour uh kristen reports that skewer gun went into cardiac arrest and he dies three
days later from complications uh so and another nurse at this point said that there was three
vials of epinephrine in the icu medicine cabinet 4 p.m., but there were none at 5.07 p.m.
Jesus.
The nurse then found the three used ones in the needle disposal bucket again.
So and also Gilbert was alone with him the whole time.
No one else had access to him or anything like that.
Terrible.
July 10th, 1996, she talks to James Peralta on the phone and she says to him that she's been killing these people.
Really?
She tells him that she's been killing him.
She said that she stole the epinephrine from the hospital stock and used the drugs to induce massive heart attacks.
She said she – we never find out exactly why, but she liked that he would be called in and so then she could hang out with him some.
And sometimes she'd get sent home early.
And generally, she liked to show off and do her—she liked the excitement of the whole thing.
That's what it was, and she wanted to show off in front of him.
That's why she enjoyed it, because he would show up?
He'd show up, and she'd get to show off and do her thing and all that sort of shit.
And then later, they'd fuck hard.
They'd fuck super hard.
This is crazy.
Now, July 11, 1996, she's arrested.
That's not for that, though, she's arrested. Yeah.
That's not for that, though. We'll talk about this.
July 12, 1996, Peralta gets a restraining order against her.
Smart.
I would do that also.
Yeah.
July 16, 1996, he is summoned before a grand jury to testify against her.
August 15, 1996, Glenn Gilbert asks investigators to come to his house and search a pantry that has a bunch of her shit in it.
Yeah.
Just in case.
He doesn't want to have anything.
Tell me what this shit is.
Investigators find a book inside called, quote, The Handbook of Poisoning.
Holy shit.
She might as well have had a picture of her with an old dying man sticking a needle in and smiling with Mickey Mouse ears on.
Like, this is fucking ridiculous.
The Handbook of Poisoning?
What the fuck?
So, August 20th, 96, she's temporarily placed in a psychiatric ward in Arbor Hospital.
This is the third time in August she's been hospitalized psychiatrically.
She's a mess right now.
I mean, technically.
She hasn't been charged with anything.
Right.
Also, if the book is printed, I mean, you can buy it.
That's the thing.
Anybody can get it.
Yeah.
That sort of thing. Well, why? Well, why? Unless you printed, I mean, you can buy it. That's the thing. Anybody can get it. Yeah. That sort of thing.
But why?
Whoa.
But why, unless you want to do this.
September 15th, 1996, she shows up, Kristen shows up at Glenn Gilbert's house and attacks
him with her car keys.
Oh, my God.
Attacks him with the car keys.
That is wonderful.
Like she put them between her fingers or some shit?
Yeah, started hacking at him, like you tell your daughter to do in a parking lot.
Right.
To fend off a rapist.
But you don't tell them to show up at someone's house, knock on their door, and then do it.
Your ex-husband who you planned on never seeing again.
Who has not bothered you and is minding his own business in his own house watching TV.
September 96, James Peralt tells Kristen that he's set to be interviewed by federal prosecutors.
She begs him not to go.
He says he's set to be interviewed by federal prosecutors. She begs him not to go. He says he's going anyway.
So she shows up and blocks James' car in his driveway with her own car and said,
you're not getting out of here.
You're going to have to ride the bus.
And so he somehow got out of there.
That shameful-ass bus.
That's right.
So he left.
He got out of there.
But later that day, after talking to the federal prosecutors, he gets back to a parking lot to discover that the air had been let out of two of his tires.
Oh, Christ.
So she's showing up doing her old tricks.
Old tricks.
In the next few days, somebody threw eggs at James Peralt's vehicle, painted its windshield of this car, scratched the surface with keys, and damaged his front license plate.
She's such a child.
And Peralt spotted a car similar to Gilbert's nearby after one of the incidents.
It was either her or Carrie Underwood.
That's one of the two.
Sir, have you been having an affair with Carrie Underwood?
No?
Well, then it can only be Kristen Gilbert then.
That's the only person that could be here.
She started to receive phone calls from someone who would just breathe heavily or hang up.
And seven of those calls were traced back to her phone number when they traced them.
It gets crazier.
He's getting heavy breathing.
She's such a hack.
She's a total hack, yeah.
She's not good with the pranks.
No.
Not at all.
She clearly bought a joke book, too.
Oh, well, let's find out the other shit she bought.
She was at Toys R Us.
It's funny that you mention that.
September 26, 96, she walks in with Toys R Us and purchases a Talk Girl Junior voice changing device.
Oh, my God.
Okay?
She also purchased a bunch of batteries compatible with it and all this.
Okay.
What was the movie with the talk boy?
Do you remember that?
Yeah.
Where he changed his voice with it?
Yeah.
For some fucking call?
That's what she's doing.
That's what she's doing.
She's an asshole.
Yeah.
That's what she's doing.
Yeah.
She's absolutely doing it.
She's like Coddington.
Herb Coddington did the same shit.
It's insane.
Go on.
So a neighbor sees her leave her apartment at 5 o'clock.
This was the time that James was going into work and sitting there.
At 5.11 p.m., James Peralt answers the phone at the security desk at the hospital and hears a brief recorded message from a voice that he described as staticky and mechanical
that made reference to Persian Gulf veterans and then said, quote, there are three explosive
devices in building one.
You have two hours.
Oh, boy.
OK, that's what she said here.
So that was the first call.
So he obviously, you know, reports this or whatever.
Over the next 90 minutes, a security desk receives more than 10 taunting messages warning them to evacuate.
One saying, this is my last call.
In 25 minutes, I'll see you in hell.
Shit like that.
Now, out of this, all of these ill people and all this all have to be moved to another building.
It's a huge problem.
It's hard for some of these people.
It's searched.
No explosives are ever found.
September 27th, the next day, Peralt receives two more calls at the security desk from someone using a distorted voice.
Yeah.
After reviewing the calls, he said, I believe it might have been Kristen Gilbert.
You fucking think?
Possibly.
Peralt describes he got more calls on the 30th and described these calls as similar to previous ones in voice, but now with a southern drawl.
That'll fool them.
Jesus Christ.
She's getting all southern.
Yeah.
And several other departments received anonymous calls that night, too, at the hospital.
So it's a – Jesus Christ.
She's terrible.
She's awful.
Now, the next day –
She's very smart and she's very manipulative.
Yeah. But being so – and she's very manipulative.
Yeah.
But being so, to throw a southern drawl.
What, did she just throw the N-word in a couple of times?
That's all it was.
That's all it was. She threatened some of the lesbians in town.
That's all it was.
I don't like them lesbians doing their parade.
There's a bomb in this here hospital to blast all them rug munchers.
It's to tell all them
lesbians that God knows what
they're doing and he does not approve
of it. I'm bringing fire and brimstone.
Ridiculous.
So the next day investigators set
up surveillance at a bunch of pay phones in the
area around her apartment that during
his shift when he's at work
Peralt receives at least four calls
including one moments after a state trooper observed
Kristen Gilbert entering a phone booth outside an ice cream stand.
So that's her.
There's your perp.
There's your perp here.
Yeah, I would say so.
And they also ended up, the police used a device that took away the distortion, and
it's just her voice.
So that's all it is here.
Everybody just said, oh, yeah, no, that's her voice.
So good.
Identified here.
September 30th, 96.
The court orders her to be placed in Bayside Medical Center.
Yeah.
She's diagnosed with borderline personality disorder here.
Yeah.
Which explains a fucking lot, I would say.
Yeah.
Not multiple.
Okay.
Borderline.
Just borderline personality disorder.
Borderline Southern.
Yeah, borderline Southern. She's got a borderline Southern disorder. Borderline Southern. Yeah, borderline Southern.
She's got a borderline Southern personality.
We're not sure about that.
That's not what that means.
Borderline is a whole other thing that we could get into for 45 minutes.
It's very complicated.
It's a tough diagnosis, borderline.
It's rough.
It's harder to treat than bipolar or anything like that.
It's a difficult one.
So, October 8th.
I had so much to say, but I'm just leaving it because it'll take too long. That's what I mean. It had so much to say
but I'm just leaving it
because
it'll take too long
that's what I mean
it's so much on that
October 8th 1996
she's released
from Bayside Medical Center
Kristen is
and arrested
promptly
right away
right away
now
October 15th 1996
for some reason
she is released
from prison
released from jail
and ordered by the court
to live in Seaatucket,
Long Island, New York, with her parents.
Okay. I don't know why a jail
is fine, too. How about jail?
Jail works. Let's figure out...
Somewhere away from society. I think the
reason is they checked her in. If she can bullshit
these people enough to show that she's not a danger
to herself or others, the medical people have to let her go.
They can't hold her because she might be a criminal.
They don't have charges to bring against her yet.
They have no choice.
They can either say, go there.
They don't even, she can just say, I'll go where I want, eat dicks, and you can arrest
me now or not.
And they have no fucking choice.
All they've got right now is that she's a menace to phone calls.
They can't charge her with anything.
Now, November 2nd, 1996, she's indicted, now you can get her, on felony charges for falsely
phoning in a
bomb threat to a federal institution.
There you go.
That's no joke here.
Now, she has a trial for the bomb threat charges we'll talk about.
Prosecutors argue that she made the calls for two reasons, to get back at Peralta for
dumping her and also to obstruct the—she's trying to muscle people.
Gotcha.
Like, oh, Kristen's scaring us.
We won't testify against her.
Like, we won't say that she's killing people.
I'm not so sure that's going to work.
No, not at all here.
Now, while she's in jail for this, authorities say, why don't we dig up a couple of those bodies that were killed earlier?
Let's have a gander.
Let's exhume those and have a look.
Let's take a gander at those bad boys here.
those bad boys here.
And just as everyone thought, toxicology analogists found epinephrine in their tissues and hadn't been prescribed to any of the victims.
So there's no reason for any of that shit to be in their bodies at all.
I was thinking of heparin.
That's what I was thinking of.
That's a blood thinner.
Yeah, yeah.
That's when the Dennis Quaid's kids died.
One of his twins died or both of his twins?
I'm not sure.
It doesn't matter.
They got an overdose.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Whatever.
They were, yeah, they had clotting issues, I believe. Right.
Well, and the
vial itself didn't give
prescription of the amount for a
child. That's right. So they gave him an adult
dose and it fucking just
essentially turns your brain to mush. That's
fucking horrible. Awful. So during this,
while she's gone and not working, the death rate
immediately dropped to normal. Weird. In Ward
C. Immediately.
Boom.
Regular.
Same as every other one.
So think about this.
They're there.
Okay.
Well, let's talk about this here.
I love seeing you with so much overloaded information.
It's just fucking crazy.
It's crazy.
This case is nuts.
It's ridiculous.
My brain is going nuts here.
So all the relationships have been ended with her at this point, too, obviously, here.
She pleaded with parole to continue the relationship while she's fucking going through all this.
Yeah, it's insane.
And I guarantee you he thought about it for a sec.
If that sex was so good that it hung for a while, that he stuck with her for a bit, he thought about it.
He for sure was like, how good was it?
Not worth 350 deaths during her shift in seven years.
That's way too many.
That's 50 a year.
That's that shit.
Good Christ.
That's that shit.
What is that?
50 a year.
That's four a month.
That's one a week almost.
That's a lot.
They did a statistical analysis of the whole thing.
She was present from January 1st, 95 to February 19th, 96.
She was present or on duty for 37 deaths.
Authorities determined the likelihood that her frequent presence during these emergencies was merely coincidental.
Based on everything was less than 0.1%.
So you're full of shit is what that says here.
They said that her MO was she'd get the epinephrine from Ward C's medicine cabinet, go into the room after everybody else had left, inject them with a fatal dose under the pretense of flushing out the IV line with a saline solution because that's her – as we know, that's her bag that she does.
And they say even that's an unusual and potentially dangerous thing to do here. So they were flushing it. Yeah. To flush it with that. They would
inject he was she would inject the non prescribed things. And then she was able to generate
the codes. There would be a code medical emergencies where she could then claim also to she could
save these people maybe. And if she didn't fuck it who cares. She got to hang out with
her boyfriend. But if she saved him, she's a fucking hero.
So they said she would do this because she wanted attention.
She wanted to hang out with her boyfriend and all this.
Now, November 27th, 1997, they exhumed the last known victim, the Edward Scuera's body.
And his body also tests positive for epinephrine.
So that's four.
They have positive.
Think about how many more.
Think about.
Four is enough to put her away for the life.
Think about how many tripled the murder rate or tripled the death rate.
350 should have been 100 something.
Think about how many of those.
There's only got four right now.
Wow.
That's insane here.
January 7th, 1998, trial begins for her false bomb threat.
That's all she's on trial for right now.
Evidence presented that she knew she was under investigation for murder at the
time of the bomb threat and she was trying to hide
things. January 27th,
1998, she's found guilty
of falsely phoning in a bomb
threat to a federal institution.
She was thought to have phoned in the threat
to divert attention from the murder
investigation, obviously. At this
point, for all of this, she is sentenced
in April of 98 to 15
months in prison for the bomb threat. That's all you get for that? 15 months. That seems like not
a lot, especially if you're doing it to divert attention from your murder investigation. Post
Oklahoma City, I bet it's way worse now. Oh, it's got to be worse. It's got to be. And at that point
in April 1998, at least eight wrongful death claims have been filed against the hospital seeking to link the patient's deaths to her.
So that's a problem also.
The hospital's got to be freaking out.
November 24th, 1998, she's officially indicted on three counts of murder.
This is for Henry Hudson, Kenneth Cutting, and Edward Skuerra.
Now, at the trial, the whole thing, or before all this, the defense, her side is they're not denying that she had an affair.
Instead, they're saying that the affair was the source of her troubles.
They said that the staff gossiped about her.
And as soon as she moved out and began divorce proceedings, she was ostracized from the other staff.
They made fun of her.
They talked shit behind her back.
She said in the spring of 96, she'd been injured and lost her job. She had health problems. And the whole thing was just too stressful and was
breaking her down. And she was in a mental hospital, in the psychiatric unit, and just
tormented. And the investigation itself just absolutely tormented her. Not the crime she's
committed, obviously. She's fine. But you people have broken this fine young woman.
Wow.
That's her defense?
Yeah, that's her goddamn defense.
July 13th, 1998.
I mean, the state just has to go, we'll let them go first on their opening statement.
Yeah.
And when they blast all that shit out, the prosecutor should just stand up, shrug his
shoulders and go, I rest my case.
That's all we need to hear there.
That's all I got.
That's good, right?
So life, right?
So life, we're doing.
July 13th.
What the fuck?
July 13th, 1998, victim, the Stanley Jagadowski's remains are exhumed.
This is number four.
Exhumation number four.
And they're going to test him, too, for the same deal.
Exhumation number four.
And they're going to test him, too, for the same deal.
February 15th, 1999.
She's moved from her cell in Danbury to Hamden County House of Corrections in Ludlow.
And she'll stay there until the trial's finished.
May 15th, 1999.
Federal prosecutors.
This is federal.
This is a big deal. Because it's a VA hospital that's happening.
That is federal property.
That's a problem.
This is a federal crime. It's a VA hospital that's happening. That is federal property. That's a problem. This is a federal crime.
That's an issue. They announced they will
seek the death penalty for Kristen Gilbert.
Does Massachusetts have it?
It does not, but it's on federal
property. You're fucking right they do.
Assistant U.S. Attorney
William Welch said, quote, in the event of a
conviction, a sentence of death is justified.
The government will seek the death penalty.
The defendant allegedly murdered four particularly vulnerable patients and tried to kill three
other patients while they lay in their hospital beds.
She did so using her poison of trust and her specialized knowledge as a nurse.
And in this case, patient and hero are interchangeable.
That's the other thing.
These are soldiers.
The guy was in World War II.
The other one's a fucking Korean war vet.
He fought Nazis for fuck's sake.
Yeah, you can't kill people who fought Nazis.
You don't get to do that.
You don't get to do that.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
He helped rid the world of the worst human ever.
Fuck, man.
The only person more famous than Jesus, and he lended a hand.
He helped get him out of there.
You're an asshole, ma'am.
So, yeah, Massachusetts does not have that.
They banned capital punishment in 84, but the federal thing can be federal.
They can throw that right in.
In the past century, in the whole 1900s, only two women were executed by the federal government.
Wow.
Relative of Kenneth Cutting, one of her alleged victims said, quote, the death penalty is there.
I think she should get it.
I like it.
They also said this woman, this is so sad.
She said, quote, she called me, Kristen Gilbert.
She called me herself and said he died.
And I guess it was right after that that she took off.
That is fucking horrible.
She called the family, told them that Kenneth was dead, and was like, I'm going home.
Yeah.
She said, quote, I thought by the grace of God it was his time to go.
To find out it was a whole different turn was hard.
No goddamn shit.
Yeah.
Her lawyer had no comment at the time.
The last women executed by the federal government was in 1953.
Wow.
Bonnie Brown Hedy was a convicted murderer and gassed to death in Missouri.
And also Ethel Rosenberg was that whole thing, espionage, in 1947.
So not a lot of people, not a lot of women getting killed by the federal government.
May 25, 1999, prosecutors, let's throw a fourth one on there.
Let's charge you with Stanley Jagodowski's murder also.
She's also charged with the attempted murder of Frances Marrier,
a patient who was injected with epinephrine and insulin on December 20th, 1995.
And survived.
Injected with insulin, not a diabetic.
Not a diabetic.
That's fucked up.
Yeah, I would say so.
She's being held without bail in federal custody since the indictment.
Yeah.
A spokeswoman for the attorney general said no additional charges are likely to be filed
against Gilbert and that, quote, for all intents
and purposes, the investigation is over.
Wow.
In other words, if we go exhuming 300 fucking people and testing them all for shit, this
is going to be a mess.
And expensive.
And expensive.
Yeah.
And it's going to be like on the wire when they had a bunch of bodies in the houses and
the vacants and they had to get them out and they said, them the fuck in there do not get them out we don't need
more bodies we're trying to get rid of the ones we have thank you very much same type of thing
okay they said fuck that uh november 20th that's shitty though those families aren't going to get
closure no that's i mean they have to wonder so much dick that sucks for them it really does i
would just assume she killed him yeah i, if your family member died in that hospital on that shift.
Probably her.
Probably her.
Probably two-thirds of them.
It's a 66% chance it's her.
I mean, she could have killed 100 people.
I mean, she could have killed.
Easily.
Easily.
It's crazy.
November of 2000, the jury is chosen.
It's nine women and three men.
Yeah.
So, you know, she's got a jury of her peers there.
Got them on her side.
Now, they exclude some things from this trial, evidence-wise.
They exclude the bomb threat evidence, which I think that's—
I mean, if she's convicted of it, why are we excluding that?
They exclude that and the threat of harassment.
Unless she brings up character, they can't bring it up now.
That's what they're saying here.
They also exclude the attempted murder of the husband and all that sort of thing.
Evidence also, the evidence involving the number of emergencies between fall 95 and February 96,
the 0.1% chance that she'd be there by accident all those times, they're going to exclude all
of that also. So they're just going to try to make it factual. I saw her go in with a needle, come out.
He had drugs in him that he shouldn't have had.
And she had a needle and then she didn't anymore.
They're dead.
So there we go.
So that's the thing here.
So you're going to get – it's going to be very touchy of who's allowed to say when they noticed epinephrine was gone, the whole deal.
It's kind of touchy here.
Trial begins on November 20, 2000 for all the murders.
Now, they say that she killed because she liked medical emergencies.
She wanted to impress their boyfriend.
They show the jury the pictures of all four of them.
One, the Jagodowski, he's in a wheelchair with his goddamn grandkids on his lap.
Holy fucking shit.
They said each man had a normal heart when he entered intensive care and that Gilbert also tried to cover her tracks by falsifying medical records, saying that she didn't give them anything.
She said that Gilbert didn't like to work hard but was, quote, very, very smart.
And the one area she excelled was in codes or medical emergencies.
She like, yeah.
That's the American dream.
Work smarter, not harder.
That's it.
Well, she liked that.
And just keep murder out of it is not part of the American dream. Work smarter, not harder. That's it. Well, she liked that. And just keep murder out of it is not part of the American dream.
Also, they bring up that she confessed to her boyfriend that she did these fucking things.
Prosecutor said, oh, man, this is his opening.
He says, quote, there was a coldness in Ward C.
You know you're in deep shit when he's building a narrative like that.
It was a deep, eerie, unsettling feeling that something terribly, terribly wrong was happening. Wow. This is like the opening of a bad movie. Yeah. He said,
finally, three registered nurses came forward to report a patient's health care professionals and
a hospital worker's worst nightmare. There was a killer amongst them. That is fucking. You should
have read that shit at the top of this i should have just said
have a good night everybody thank you uh yeah so uh she first comes under scrutiny here and
they talk about that that everyone started to notice the shortfalls of epinephrine and all
that sort of thing uh two hour opening argument for the defense too he emphasizes that no one
had seen her actually inject the patients so i mean someone could have came from the ceiling
a ninja and did it.
Who knows?
He said they were all extremely sick and that the prosecution's claim that epinephrine was found in the exhumed bodies of the patients was shoddy science at best.
You know, that's just medical testing.
It's very shoddy, the science.
It's like Dennis Rodman trying to explain how these women ended up in the bed when Carmen Electra walks in.
I like how he said they were all extremely sick anyway.
That's like George Costanza on Seinfeld pitching Corbin Bernson the L.A. law case of his dead cat.
Like he killed a woman's cat and he's like, she wanted me to buy her a new cat.
And I was like, it's a pretty old cat.
I don't think I could buy you a whole new one.
That's ridiculous.
I'll go down to the dumpster right now and get you a cat.
I feel like that's what they basically said here.
They were dying anyway? Is that what they basically said here. They were
dying anyway? Is that what they're
saying? They're all sick and old. Who cares?
Jesus Christ. World War II vets drop
dead like that. Saving the government money.
We don't have to take care of these guys anymore.
Defense attorney also said that the case
is really about an investigation that started
with a conclusion, then worked backwards
to fill up the gaps. He said, quote,
and the proposition they started with was that the people were injected with
epinephrine and Kristen Gilbert did it.
Yeah, that's the theory.
That's right here.
You got it.
And they worked backward to fill in the gaps?
Worked backward to-
No, her boyfriend said after people died, we fucked harder.
Yeah.
She screamed louder and was much more into it.
I don't know.
Really weird.
Really super weird.
What in the fuck?
The defense tried to neutralize the prosecution's claim that other nurses had found broken containers of the epinephrine in the needle disposing thing.
They said, well, why haven't they produced these containers?
Where are these containers?
Why doesn't the prosecution have them? Where are these containers? Why doesn't the prosecution have them?
Where are these containers?
They're in the fucking garbage.
They saw it and noted it mentally.
He also said that the toxicologist who's supposed to testify about epinephrine in two of the bodies, he, quote, invented a process in order to find what he wanted to find.
Or that's called moving science along and finding tests that do things.
That's how DNA got found.
They found a test that got the information they were looking for.
That's the point.
It's kind of the idea of science.
Yeah, I don't think he made a test that says anything that's put on it is epinephrine.
That would be the test that just tells him what he wants to hear.
Yeah, he also said it's so silly, man.
It's so silly, man. It's so silly.
The judge said, quote, this is largely going to come down to a battle of scientific experts.
Unless the science is – and the defense attorney said that they should not convict, quote, unless the science is sound, reliable science.
Like you did testing and found shit in the system.
Holy fuck.
Testimony had – they talked about the first seven patients,
the ones she killed, the ones she attempted to kill.
They talked about the stop, stop, ow, ow, you're killing me.
Right.
But the nurse also said that he was a frequently loud complainer.
That's the other thing.
They might have said he was a complainer.
I mean, they have nurses do that with people.
He's a pain in the ass.
This one's a fucking.
But when you're dying, that's what you're going to do.
Yeah, but they're like, ow, ow, ow, ow. Yeah, right sure he's dying he's dying he's dying they're all dying uh yeah now another
they describe they talk about a moment from february 15th the prosecution does uh february
15th 1996 when another nurse nurse kathy ricks uh began to suspect foul play uh connected with
the drugs uh she counted three containers in the intensive care unit.
That's the one we talked about. Right.
The hour she did there.
The prosecutor said, quote, she felt sick to her stomach and her knees about buckled
because she knew what had been happening on Ward C.
Wow.
She figured it out at that point.
And yeah, they said she twice tried to murder people in November 1995.
She tried to poison the guy in 1996.
She caused a medical emergency
by removing a patient's breathing tube
in 1994.
Yeah, they're going over everything
here. She forced an untrained
colleague to use cardiac defibrillation
paddles on a patient during
a medical emergency in 1995
by refusing to use the equipment
herself. She said she wouldn't do it.
Prosecutors said that Gilbert threatened the life of at least one person verbally and physically in July. by refusing to use the equipment herself. She said she wouldn't do it.
Prosecutors said that Gilbert threatened the life of at least one person verbally and physically in July.
She's threatening to kill her husband, her boyfriend, everything else.
She's forcing somebody else to do it because she doesn't want to do it. She just didn't force him.
She just wouldn't do it herself because she didn't feel like doing it.
She didn't want to bring him back.
She didn't want to bring him back.
Exactly.
That one's mine.
I'm keeping him.
I'm going to have to feed that fucker pudding if you bring him back.
That's right.
January 23, 2001, Glenn Gilbert testifies against his ex-wife.
Yeah.
Told the court that she confessed to the murders, to him too.
Yeah.
Peralt testified and said that she said to him, quote, I did it.
You wanted to know?
I killed all those guys by injection.
That's pretty goddamn clear here.
She told him that she killed all the patients and
that she was angry and she was being angry and proactive, but not actually confessing. That's
what the defense said. She was being angry and saying shit, but she didn't actually confess.
They said, and as for the missing drugs, the defense said, quote, no one knew how much
epinephrine was missing. If any, it could have been nothing. These people can't count. No one
can count. Medical professionals can't count. No one can count. Medical professionals can't
count. In closing arguments,
prosecutors said that the
nurse used the perfect poison to kill her victims.
Said, quote, these seven
victims were veterans. They were
vulnerable. They were the perfect victims.
When Kristen Gilbert killed them, she used the perfect
poison. Lawyers for her
said they all died of natural causes.
She's falsely accused.
They said that it was all about her co-workers
talking shit about her for having an
extramarital affair. That's all this says.
They all died of cardiac
arrest. Doesn't matter.
Listen, this is the explanation
right here. Quote, she was scorned by her peers
and co-workers. You must understand how
rumors about what was going on in Kristen Gilbert's
life affected, colored, and tainted everyone's opinions on what was going on in Ward C.
So that's what happens.
When someone gets divorced, you figure she killed 150 people.
That's obvious.
Clearly.
That happens in every hospital.
Don't get divorced if you work in a hospital.
Everyone will accuse you of murder.
They just start dying.
Yeah.
The death rate triples in your hospital ward when you get divorced.
Yeah.
Every time. Every time.
Every time.
Deliberations start on February 23rd.
More than 70 witnesses and 200 pieces of evidence to go over on this.
They do 12 days of deliberation on that, which seems just to go over everything.
And she is found guilty of three counts of first degree murder, one count of second degree murder and two counts of attempted murder.
Wow.
That is not great.
No.
March 27, 2001, her father and her grandmother came in for the sentencing, pleading with
the jurors to let her live, saying a death sentence would be devastating to her two sons
and to their whole family.
They set a life term.
The defense attorney set a life term in prison.
It was punishment hard enough.
For a woman who was convicted on evidence, they said, was nothing more than circumstantial.
Sure.
They also, during the sentencing, argued that the deaths were natural causes.
The defense attorney said, quote, it is easier to incite good and decent people to kill when
their target is not a human, but a demon.
Kristen Gilbert is not a monster.
She is a human being.
She's a horrible woman.
She's a horrible person.
She's not an angel of death.
No.
She's not this type that they call this type of killer.
She's a demon of death.
That was a perfect way to put it.
If you're killing people, how can you be an angel at all?
Jesus.
Her other attorney said, quote, I don't know what caused her to break down and spiral to the depths of where she is today.
I don't know that anyone could tell you how to answer that.
And then the prosecution said, I got this.
She said, quote, this defendant did not snap. People do not
snap for a period of seven months when they
kill human beings. This is
fucking ridiculous.
He said that
he said people do not snap.
Quote, people do not snap for a period of
seven months when they kill four human
beings. And he dropped the mic.
Right. Assistant.
Good night, everybody. Try the salmon.
Have a good one. Tip your weight, Steph.
He also called Gilbert
a shell of a human being who deserved
to die for the cold and calculating way
she murdered victims, injecting them with overdoses
of the heart stimulant.
So that's a thing
here. Prosecutors said that she wanted to attract
attention, told the jurors that again.
They had Claire Jagodowski, the wife, the widow of Stanley Jagodowski, said, quote,
I still listen for his key in the door. Now I have to face old age alone. Good Lord. Holy
shit. She's about to be sentenced and she has an opportunity to address the judge.
And she says, no, thanks. I'm going to stand here and sob softly. She didn't offer to clean out his veins with a saline solution?
No, it's very, very strange here.
Yeah, it's very, very strange here.
They come back, the jury, and they have a verdict here.
And you, ma'am, may fuck off.
Jury sentences her to four consecutive life terms without the possibility of parole plus 20 years.
Wow.
Eat fucking dicks.
Just in case. Just in case.
Just in case.
God damn it.
So, yeah, she's there.
She could have been sentenced to lethal injection and would have been the only woman on federal
death row.
Is that right?
Yeah, she would have been the only one.
No audible reaction from the courtroom or anything like that.
They're just like, yeah, that sounds right.
Her parents wept.
Most of the family didn't, though.
Her father said, quote, it's a very bittersweet day when you think your daughter is going to get life imprisonment in front of instead of the death penalty.
And you're happy about that.
Like, that's that's a weird thing here.
Christine Duquette, who was Henry Hudson's brother, one of the victims.
She has a little different thing.
She said that life wouldn't have been my first choice, but I'm happy it's over.
It's over and done with. i'm not disappointed uh the defense attorney said quote uh that he was quote very gratified to see the jury reflected the values of the pioneer valley
and greater massachusetts and and spared kristin's life uh he said quote where there is life there is
hope we will appeal we will continue to fight my god what are you fucking fighting what are you
fighting uh he makes a speech in 2001 to the press about how uh during the penalty phase she was We will appeal. We will continue to fight. My God. What are you fucking fighting? What are you fighting?
He makes a speech in 2001 to the press about how during the penalty phase she was she was referred to as a, quote, empty chasm of darkness.
And then she was dehumanized.
That's good language right there.
Yeah.
It was dehumanized, quote, all to justify what he was doing.
The prosecutor asking his fellow citizens to to help him expunge life.
It's the power of conviction.
Once they had convicted themselves, convinced themselves, there was nothing that could be done, no room to see the slightest possibility of error.
Yeah. So in May 2001, she's transferred from a federal prison in Framingham to a federal prison in Carswell, Texas, where she can work on her southern drawl a little bit here.
Yeah.
She remained down there in Carswell, Texas, where she can work on her southern drawl a little bit here. Yeah. She remained down there in Carswell, Texas.
She's been down there ever since.
This is May 2001.
She started appealing, but in July of 2003, she dropped her federal appeal for a new trial.
Really?
Because a recent Supreme Court ruling at the time would have allowed prosecutors to then pursue the death penalty again.
It's like, you want a new trial?
If she wants a retrial, they can bring the death penalty again. It's like, you want a new trial?
If she wants a retrial, they can bring the death penalty back.
Sure.
Well, let's bring that back and see how this is.
She said, never mind.
I'm good.
I'm good.
Thanks.
I'm good here.
No, no, I don't need a shot of anything, really.
I'm fine.
I'm working on my tan.
I'm all right.
So she is residing down there.
Judge Michael Ponzer, who was the judge for this four-month trial, later described it.
He wrote an article and said it was a, quote, classic battle of experts, like he said before.
He said that the defense presented well-respected clinicians with excellent credentials who testified all of the victims could have died from natural and explainable causes.
Prosecutors presented four doctors who concluded the deaths were consistent with epinephrine poisoning, But they could not state it was definitely the cause according to what he understood.
There was other evidence including the alleged admission of a crime by Gilbert herself during an argument with Peralt.
Still, the judge wrote that he thought much of the government's case was circumstantial.
Maybe, but still.
Fuck that.
So she's in prison.
She's gone.
Poor Kristen Gilbert.
One thing I do have to tell you and advise everybody out there.
This Kristen Gilbert's a piece of shit.
Who killed nice.
I don't know if they're nice or not.
But he killed people who didn't deserve to die, number one.
People that fought for this country.
And all of that.
I understand you want to fucking hate this lady.
You can hate her all you want.
But please, whatever you do, don't take it out on Kristen N. Gilbert, MD.
Oh, boy.
Dr. Kristen N. Gilbert, endocrinologist with the Schrenk Specialty Associates in Seymour, Illinois.
She went to the Indiana University School of Medicine.
Worked her ass off.
She was Bachelor of Arts in Biology, magna cum laude from DePaul University Medical School.
From DePaul?
Yeah, she just does.
Jesus.
She seems like a fine, outstanding medical professional.
If you need her services in Indiana and Seymour, Indiana, please go see Kristen N. Gilbert
because if you Google search her name and doctor, nurse, medicine, anything like that,
it says that she killed four veterans, and she didn't.
She's a nice doctor.
I feel bad for this lady.
At least four veterans. At least. Possibly 100. We didn't. She's a nice doctor. I feel bad for this lady. At least four veterans.
At least.
Possibly 100.
We don't know.
We don't know.
So, yeah, that is Kristen Gilbert, Northampton, Massachusetts.
Holy shit, is that a crazy story.
That is super depressing that you can work your ass off and fight for this country and
go to other lands and fight Nazis.
Fight Nazis, the worst of the worst.
Yeah, emperors and everything else.
To come back, and when your knee hurts, you go to the doctor and you have a heart attack.
And you have a heart attack because some asshole wanted attention from her security guard boyfriend.
Fucking unreal, man.
Jesus.
If you like that story, you sick bastards.
I can't believe it.
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it's been our pleasure. Bye. Wall money. I'm Ed Donohue with an AP News Minute.
President Trump spoke today in Kansas City about
immigration. We want people that can love our country and people that can help our country.
The president wants Congress to fully fund his immigration plan, including money for his border
wall. They're playing games. They're playing political games. I actually think the politics
of what they're doing is very bad for them, but we're going to very soon find out. Maybe I'm not
right, but usually I'm right. Sources say President Trump will nominate the Army Chief of Staff,
General Mark Milley, as his next top military advisor. A deputy shot and killed during a mass
shooting at a bar in Southern California last month died from friendly fire. FBI analysis
confirmed that this was a rifle round fired by a CHP officer.
This bullet struck Sergeant Helus in the chest and struck his heart.
Twelve people in all were killed at the country music bar.
On Wall Street, stocks sharply lower ahead of the closing bell.
I'm Ed Donohue. you. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Small Town Murder early and ad-free on Amazon Music.
Download the Amazon Music app today, or you can listen early and ad-free with Wondery Plus and
Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at
wondery.com slash survey. It's all a lighthearted nightmare on our podcast, Morbid. We're your
hosts. I'm Alina Urquhart. And I'm Ash Kelly.
And our show is part true crime, part spooky, and part comedy. The stories we cover are well
researched. He claimed and confessed to officially killing up to 28 people. With a touch of humor.
I'd just like to go ahead and say that if there's no band called Malevolent Deity,
that is pretty great. A dash of sarcasm and just garnished a bit
with a little bit of cursing.
This mother f***er lied.
Like a liar.
Like a liar.
And if you're a weirdo like us
and love to cozy up to a creepy tale of the paranormal,
or you love to hop in the Wayback Machine
and dissect the details of some of history's
most notorious crimes,
you should tune in to our podcast, Morbid.
Follow Morbid on the Wondery app
or wherever you get
your podcasts.
You can listen to
episodes early and
ad-free by joining
Wondery Plus
in the Wondery app
or on Apple Podcasts.