Smart Money Happy Hour with Rachel Cruze and George Kamel - Stirring the Pot With These Off-Limits Topics

Episode Date: January 16, 2025

💵 Start your free budget today. Download the EveryDollar app! If you love awkward silences, just try asking your blind date how much money he makes. In this episode, Rachel and George share hot takes on common taboo money topics, plus how you can avoid cringey situations. Next Steps:  🍸 Follow Smart Money Happy Hour on TikTok: @smartmoneyhappyhour.     📱Submit a Guilty As Charged question for Rachel and George! Send a DM to @rachelcruze or @georgekamel on Instagram! Be sure to type “GUILTY?” at the top of your message so we don’t miss it.   Connect With Our Sponsors: 🔒 Get 20% off when you join DeleteMe. 🌿 Get up to 40% off at Cozy Earth with code Smart Money. Today’s Happy Hour Special: 🍸 Smashing Sage Spritzer (Mocktail) Recipe: Drinking for Two: Nutritious Mocktails for the Mom-To-Be Ingredients: 1 cup fresh or frozen blackberries or cherries 1 tablespoon lime juice 1 teaspoon honey 1/3 cup coconut water 1 cup seltzer 4 sage leaves Additional blackberries and sage leaves for garnish Instructions: Muddle blackberries with sage leaves and honey in the bottom of a shaker. Add lime juice and coconut water; fill shaker with ice. Shake vigorously. Strain, if desired. Divide the shaken mixture between two ice-filled lowball glasses. Top with seltzer and stir. Garnish with fresh sage and blackberries. Listen to More From Ramsey Network: 💡 The Rachel Cruze Show 💰 George Kamel 🎙️ The Ramsey Show 💸 The Ramsey Show Highlights 🧠 The Dr. John Delony Show 🪑 Front Row Seat with Ken Coleman 📈 EntreLeadership   Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey guys, I'm Rachel Cruz. I'm George Camel. And this is Smart Money Happy Hour. Cheers, George. So refreshing. Effervescent. Well, this is the show where two friends who happen to be money experts talk about what you're talking about.

Everything from pop culture, current events, and money. And today's episode is going to get awkward, Rachel, because we are talking about conversation grenades. I think I'm not the first one to call it that. Look at us. Just stirring the old pot. This is definitely a pot-stirring episode. So even if you just watch for the entertainment,

value, it's going to be worth your time. This makes my heart race a little fast. Yeah, no violence here by the way. I know grenades, it's a very strong word, but we're talking, you know, salaries, politics, wedding budgets. We're not afraid to go there. Yeah. But first. All the way in. What are we sipping on, George? We are sipping on a

smashing sage spritzer mocktail. Mmm. That upset me, just reading that name. That's a hefty. Great drink with one of the most annoying names. Smashing Sage. But it's great. It's like fabulous life. A smashing sage, sprits or mocktail.

I remember that show. That was so good. So stick around until the end. We'll give you our rating and reveal the cost per glass. Yeah, it's funny when people find out that you're like part of Ramsey. You get a couple of different...

It's dangerous. Yeah, a couple different takes sometimes. You get some that are like, oh my gosh, seriously, we paid off like $24,000 in debt. Thank you so much. Like, oh my gosh. And I would say 90% of my interactions is that. And then you have like the, oh, okay, sorry, we still have a credit card

or like, sorry, we love car loans, don't like hate me. And you're like, no, it's fine, it's fine. And then you have like the 1% that's like, hmm, hmm. And they do that I thing. And you're like, have you ever had like a really awkward interaction? I had one while we were downtown doing a man on the street interview. So we find strangers like, hey, let's talk about money. And like they have to sign a waiver at the end saying we can use it on the YouTube channel.

Well, she didn't know that we were part of Ramsey at first. We had told her, but she couldn't breeze by it. She's signing the waiver and goes, wait, Ramsey? As in like Dave Ramsey? We're like, yeah. And she goes, oh, I can't sign this. And she just walked away. And we're like, girl, who hurt you?

What? It was wild. So I was like, it is controversial. Just to help people get out of debt. Just trying to help people budget, you know. Do that every dollar app. That's what we're out here doing for America. But people weirdly are okay sharing a lot of.

details about their finances, which is rare in other small talk conversations. Yeah, because it is funny in our jobs, especially on the Ramsey show, you immediately ask people. Okay, so how much you make? Okay, how much does that take home? Okay. What's your car payment? I mean, you are just diving in.

What are your exact debt loads? Why did you take out that deal? What was going on in your life? What was going on the personal loan? I mean, you got to get all the info. We got to get to the bottom of it. Yeah, but money can definitely be a conversation grenade. But some other things, too, George can make that happen.

Last year it's been politics, Rachel. That is the number one, man. Yeah. So we're going to help you today. Maybe avoid them, maybe learn how to navigate them. And for us, that's another day at the office. This is what we do. This is what we do.

Yeah. We talk about the taboo. So some common off-limit topics. Although conspiracy theory, yeah, that's my number one. Okay. It's a good one. That's a good one. Another one.

Why aren't you drinking? Oh, that's a big one. Yeah, what's going on? What's wrong? You good? Something is wrong with you if you're not drinking. Not wild? You're pregnant?

That's what, are you pregnant? Yeah, yeah, totally. If you're a woman, that's the first thing. Everything okay? Or did you have a problem? Yeah, is everything fine? Yes, I know. So I don't personally pressure.

I don't get into it. If they're not, I don't go, why, you should. You should be if you're not. That's a weird thing. Yeah, I'm glad you don't do that, George. Not me. You should be drinking. People choose sobriety for a lot of reasons.

Even though this is Smart Money Happy Hour. And we're drinking a mocktail today. That's right. What an appropriate drink for that topic. So we're above approach for one episode. Yeah, but let's, yeah, yeah, you don't need to ask. People choose sobriety for a lot of reasons. Maybe it's health, maybe it's addiction, pregnancy, religious beliefs.

Maybe they're just not into it. It's fine. Budget priorities, because alcohol is expensive. Here's another one. Sports. Oh. This could be a grenade depending on the family. Yes.

Right? This could tear up a family if you're not careful. Man. If you have rival sports teams in the family. Yeah, I had a cousin that went to Georgia. Oh. So Tennessee, Georgia, big rivalry there? Sure, yeah.

and then I had another cousin that got married on a UT weekend and the uncles brought small TVs to the reception and watched the game. You got to expect that. I think, I mean, being in the South and that's your... People know. It's a religion. It's a religion down here. You can't have a wedding during a football game.

What are you expecting? They're not going to hit the dance floor. But still also, come on. Sometimes what I do, can I be honest? I will throw a conversation grenade just by saying, war-tied. War-tied. Role legal. Yeah, you have to think about it.

Just as, because I don't care. You know what I mean? I have no allegiance to any team, only to God. But you just switched up the... I switched it up. I just mix it all together, jumble it. That way everyone's angry. And everyone's confused.

But can I tell you, I went to one of my first NFL games recently. Good for you, George. How was it? Sports fans are not okay. Okay. Like, first of all, all these grown men wearing jerseys with another grown man's name on it is just weird. Yeah. Like, why are you cosplaying as the person on the field?

Like, you can show the sport. It's just weird. It's like Taylor Swifting you dress up as Taylor to go to her concert. That even feels different to be like, oh, I love her outfits. You're literally dressing like a professional athlete. Like, that's the only sport we do that for. That's odd. Not the only sport.

You do it for hockey. And people, other sports do it. I guess, yeah, but football's the big one. Okay. And then the anger, the emotion. And then they're going like, how'd you miss that? You should have ran faster. And this dude is not, he's not in shape.

He's huffing down a corn dog. Might be his last one. It is so true. And he's judging the guy on the field for not being athletic enough. It's just a weird... Because the guy on the field is getting paid to do it, though. Millions. Exactly.

So it's like, catch the football. That's always... That's a catchable ball. Catch the football. I don't talk about sports unless I know I can make people angry. Okay, and you know what? This is why sports betting makes me crazy. Crazy.

I hate sports betting because I'm like, you are betting on something that you have no control over, at least like playing craps like Vegas. Like that's the concept of building. You get to like roll the dice. That's true. It drives me nuts though because I'm like, you don't know. You can't control Allen number 18.

Oh, you know the players. No, I don't know. I was made up a name. But like it's just you can't control them. And here they are. And you're like, what do you do? That's true. I don't like it.

I don't like it. All right. Next up, this is a recent conversation grenade for you, Rachel. Ooh, how much did you pay for your dog or your cat? The adopt don't shop discussion. is gotten out of hand. And you recently had your dog had puppies. My dog had puppies.

On purpose was not an accident. We meant for her. It was intentional family planning. Yes, it was. It was. Yeah, and I got a lot of, a lot of hate. I did not realize, did not realize how angry people get when you breed your dog. I didn't know.

I mean, I think adopting is great. Children, dogs. I mean, like adoption is a wonderful, beautiful thing. Have you never watched the end of prices, right? Yeah, get your dog spayed and neutered, Bob Barker. I know. That was his one mission, Rachel. But I know, but that's so that your dog doesn't go get pregnant,

and then you get a little of puppies, and you have to put them in the shelter. Like, I get it. But when you want a specific dog for hunting, or whatever, like, people do look for specific breeds, and if you want that specific breed, the breed has to live on, which means it has to have puppies.

And how many puppies did Sweet June have? She had six. Is she Catholic? She. That's a lot of puppies. Is that a normal amount of puppies? No. For her size and the first litter, they said like three on average.

That's what I was thinking. She had six. So we have April, May. June, mom. And then Liberty. Couldn't have gone July. Because Liberty, I know. Because Liberty is going to a family in D.C.

and I named her Liberty, which is super cute. Okay, that's cute. She's really cute. And then we have cinnamon, boulder, and buddy. Wow, we really lost the months quickly there. You read the voice, yeah. It was like April, May, June, Boulder, cinnamon. Mango.

The kids named, anyways. Okay. It has been so fun. It's been so great. But anyways, yeah, that's a bomb to drop in front of people. Apparently that you didn't know. Yeah, I bought French bulldogs, which are some of the most expensive dogs money can buy. And the number one dog breed in America, it passed the Labrador retriever for the first time in like 50 years.

Did you know that George? It's the number one popular breed now in America is the French bulldog. And let me just say, before you go. Do people mad? Are people mad that you have them? They're mad I didn't adopt. Okay. And I'm like, but these are the dogs that my wife and I both have always dreamed of owning.

But yeah, is there a limit you think of how much you should spend on a dog? Or are you like, hey, if you pay cash and it's your dream, go for it. People spend money on stupid things. I think it's that. I don't think it's a black or white issue. I think it's, yeah. Not right and wrong. My dogs bring me more joy than humans, so why would I not giving a great life?

Winston, I both have a number. His is higher than mine on what you would spend to like keep your dog alive. That's a conversation grenade. What is the number where, hey, if it's going to cost 11 grand for phytoc surgery, we let him meet Jesus. What do you do? I know. What do you do? It's very hard because you could keep a dog a lot.

I mean, people go through like cancer treatments with their dogs. I mean, like people do, they go to the ends of the earth. for their dogs. Wow. And I love dogs, but I don't know. And I think it's important if you do have an animal to have a number to say what's wise for our situation. Because just like your famous call on the Ramsey show with Katie and the horse, she couldn't

afford the horse. That's right. So George told her to sell the horse. And the horse doesn't even know her name. You didn't have to put that part in, but that's also what happened. Yeah. But to have like, yeah, just to be wise with it. But anyways, that's a conversation.

Another conversation grenade that now leans into pocket. religion. This lady in the lobby the other day, she came by the Ramsey show, she slipped me a tract, like an old school track and it said, do pets go to heaven? Didn't read it? I don't know. I don't know. Did she have the answer? He apparently had the answer, but I was too scared to look. That's a fun theological discussion. I'm going to say yes. Here's my thing. If I don't make it to heaven but my dog does, I'm going to be pissed.

Oh, God. I don't want to know. I think other reasons to be pissed. I don't want to know. I think they do. I think God created them. I do think it, yes. But then you have to go, well, cats, too? No. No, I'm just kidding.

Yes. Animals? I don't know. What about snakes? Okay, fine. I know. I just said I wasn't theologically. I was a great conversation grenade to talk to you. I don't know. friend gives them a hard time because they're jumping on a bandwagon and it's not a real allergy. You know, people have real... Sorry, George.

I got gluten this weekend. How was it? Terrible. It wasn't fun. I think I'm getting some canker soresors. We were all together with some guys, guy hang out, and he had these like bourbon balls that are made with like peanuts and corn. And he's like, no, it's gluten free. Trust me.

So I'm great. So I had one. And then he calls me 10 minutes later and goes, hey, man, I forgot. I put Oreos in there. And I was like, oh, that's definitely not gluten-free. So what happened for real? I took gluten-digested pills when I got home, chugged a ton of water, and I've survived.

I have not been hospitalized. But I do think I'm getting some canker sores on my tongue and mouth. It's just, it's not fun. Man, George. So again, it's not like a life or death thing. It doesn't have to be that. But it's just like I'm intolerant to it, you know, like a dairy intolerance.

Yeah. So don't judge people. Or if they want to eat sugar and you're like, you know what that's doing to your body, just... That's right. Red 40, listen. Earn their relationship. They're eating that popsicle, that red popsicle,

just whatever, you know? My thing is, was the advice solicited? Did you ask for Rachel's advice about sugar? Or did she just come up to you go, I wouldn't put that in my body? That's great. Yes, yes. Do you have family members or friends that would make comments like that?

Because I do. Here's one from my own family, and bless my little sweet Arabic mom. I've been gluten-free since 2017. Okay. And that's when I met Whitney, so she thinks it's happenstance. But I used to eat pita bread. That's what you eat with hummus. Like with everything in the Middle Eastern culture.

So all of a sudden, I'd go, no, I can't have pita bread. And she's like, but you had pizza bread for 27? Why can't you have? And I'm like trying to explain to her like, my body is now intolerant because I took it out of my system. I don't react well with it. And so. She didn't get it.

It's hard. Yeah, which I get. Yeah, she's like, George, you've done this your whole life. What are you doing now? Is this an act? Yes, that's good. That's good. Sweet May, I love you.

Okay, here's another one. How much money do you make? Oh. This one has become like, we should all be. transparent with our salary. Like, why are we all just sharing? I will say this, though. I've had friends that are in a similar space that I am in

on different things. And they've been so... I mean, they're like, oh, I did this and this and made this and this and you're like, oh, wow, I didn't know. Okay, that's good to know. If it's in a, weirdly a business context and you're comfortable with a person...

It's almost like sharing your business revenue. Yeah, it doesn't, like that does not... Because they're solo entrepreneurs essentially, right? And it's helpful to know, like, okay, here's like, what I'm doing and what I'm making. Yeah, I don't know. There's a part of me that that's helpful. But they're like solopreneurs.

But when it's your mother-in-law and it's like, so how much are you making? Or what, like that feels weird, right? Yeah. It's the situation. For me, you know, it is my grandma. Does she ask how much you make? I think she wants to know what all the grandkids are making

and she'll kind of like size everyone up secretly. Who's more successful? Exactly. Money-wise? Oh, stop it, George. That's funny. That's her toxic trait. That is...

Shout out to grandma. You know what? I'm going to be that grandma. Give me your info. I want to know. I think part of this she wants to be proud, you know, but it's like she keeps tabs on what all the grandkids are making. Have you ever told her how much you've made? I don't think so.

Maybe back in the day when I was, you know, early in my career. Yeah, yeah. But no, I don't find it to be helpful to grandma or anyone. Because you know grandmas are catty. Oh, yeah. They're sharing that information somewhere. I cannot wait to be, I can't wait to be like in my 80s. I feel like I could get away with anything.

You will be so toxic. And I will be toxic. Bougy, toxic Rachel comes out. Call me Ray Ray. 82-year-old Rachel will be spilling the tea everywhere she goes. She'll gossiping everywhere, all over town. You'll be sparking drama. You spark fake drama.

Oh, did you hear what she said about you? Oh, my gosh. No, I won't. And you'll always be the perfect one. I'll be a redeemed version of what you see right now. I'll become healthier and healthier. There are times where it makes sense to talk about how much you make. If your parents are aging, they're older, it's good to know and they're still working.

okay, so it's good to know what the financial situation is, so you can help if or when something happens, right? I mean, like, there are scenarios. You want to make sure they're on track so you don't have to take care of them. Your spouse, this is a big one. If your spouse doesn't know how much you make, you should not be married. That's ridiculous.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, for sure. Full transparency. He has his own bank account, so I don't really know what comes in. And that's why we talk about budgeting together, combining finances once you're married, and the budget helps you look at everything together. Yes. and being unified, especially as a married couple.

Yeah. So if you want to check out every dollar, we'll drop a link in the description. So great. All right, another conversation, grenade. What's your name, address, and social security number? I'm not falling for this one again. I'm glad you don't, because you know why, George, you use Delete Me.

That's right. And Delete Me is such a great service because it goes online and removes all of your personal info from data broker websites. Phone number, emails. Because data breaches are so common nowadays. and our information online is, it's a huge deal. It's a huge deal. So getting it off is really important.

And Delete Me, that's what they do. That's their service, and it's amazing. So if you want to protect yourself from the risks of online scams and data breaches, check out, Delete Me. They've got a custom promo code just for Smart Money Happy Hour listeners. You guys. You'll get 20% off any of their plans if you go to JoinDletme.com slash Smart Money. And these are super affordable.

We're talking about like nine bucks a month for an individual, a little bit more for a whole family. And honestly, today, I probably wouldn't talk about this maybe 15 years ago because it wasn't a thing. But in today's world, there are things that are evolving that you have to be on top of to protect yourself and this is one of them.

It is. We live in a world of the internet and so protecting your data is really key. And you'll sleep easier. And it's a lot of work. So to have someone else do it for me and send me a report, I'm like, great, one less thing to worry about. Thanks to delete me. Yes.

All right, next, Conversation Grenade. Commenting on physical appearances. This one I feel especially bad for females. They get the brunt of this, even from other females, from their mother, from their mother-in-law, from the grandma. I'm like, oh, you've been eating good, whatever it is, just the comments. Or you look too little.

You're too, you eat this. You need to eat more. Or are you pregnant? You look tired. I just don't have makeup on, grandma. Yes, God, my grandma. You need to smile more. Oh no! Have you gotten that one?

I'm always smiling. Yeah, the physical appearance thing. Can we not? Unless it's just a compliment. Like, you look really pretty today. Right? Like, just something kind. Yeah. But it's almost like the Chris is on.

This happened to me this weekend. Uh-oh. We're at the guys hang. Yeah. One guy said, dude, you've been slimming down. You look great. Another guy said, you've been putting on a few pounds. I was like, one of you is wrong.

Oh, stop it. That's so funny. I don't know. I haven't been on a scale to know. Yeah. But how are these two? You guys have radically different views. Different views. Yes. So funny.

So it just feels like there's no need for that. It's not helpful. Yeah. If you don't have nothing nice to say, keep to yourself. Don't say anything at all, especially if it's condescending, but in like a nice, cheery way. We don't need it. We don't need it. We get this a lot, George, when we go and meet people, whether it's like at live events or if we do this show here and we go out and take pictures, we get comments a lot about our physical appearance. It's like it's pretty.

Can I tell you the most common one for me? I know it. George. Say it. You're so much shorter than I thought you were. They say it to George. Sometimes not even that long. They just go, you're short. You're short.

That's the first thing that popped in your mind. And I get what they're saying. They see me on, you know, on whatever the shows. I know. You can't tell height that much. I could be 6'2 for all you know. And I don't think it comes from a bad place. But it's one of those like, oh, only.

Yeah, little do they know I'm 510 instead of 62. It's like big difference. Yes. Who cares? What about you? What do they say to you? I've gotten, wow, you're a much smaller in person, comment. Oh.

Uh-huh. Oh, my gosh, you're so much smaller in person. I'm like, hi. Wow. I don't know what to tell you. I got a weird one. I went to the, uh, the FinCon, like financial content creator thing. Yeah.

And people kept saying, you look just like your profile picture. And I was like, what? That's a good. Catfish you? Like, I don't understand. Totally. God, my picture looks like me. I guess because I'm primped the exact same way every day.

I don't know. The hair goes the exact same way. I know. So anyways, I don't think it's all a negative motivation, but... Yeah. Have I wanted to comment back about their physical appearance? Yeah. That's right.

What if you... On occasion, I say it in my heart. Okay, I will say people that are really tall, I end up saying, oh my gosh, you are so tall. I do say that. That's, like, the one attribute that, like, it just, like, naturally comes out. I do I more casual, I'll say, do I have to stand next to you? Oh, that's sweet. And that way it's more of a, like, because I'm so little.

I wonder if really tall people to find that annoying. I think they're tired of it. I think they're tired of being tall. It's exhausting being tall. Yes. Ask me. We have a friend,

and he's like six, five. I mean, he's huge. And he has to get, like, custom, like, shirts and stuff because he can't, like, shop places. So I bet they are tired. We're so sorry. I love people. I love people's empathy for tall people.

Like, where is this coming from? I know. It makes me just like... You don't think short people have to get their pants and jeans, 10 every single time? Oh, man. Because Gene's come on a standard 30-inch inseam.

Oh, man. All right, moving on from physical appearance. It's exhausting. Next up, we have compliments and questions about cost. Oh, I love your bag. How much was it? This house is nice. What did it cost you?

Love your place, but why are you still renting? Awkward. Throwing in that. Now, the only time that's fun is when you spent very little. We're like, oh, thank you. I got it, T. It was on C.J. Max. was on clearance.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right. That's right. You wouldn't believe. Yeah. It's fun when it was a frugal purchase, but when it's... When it costs something,

it feels weird. Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally, because you do feel like, oh. Unless it's a very close friend. You don't want to, like, yeah, overly do it if it is something really nice. Yep. Compliment me on my watch, George.

Wow, what a nice watch. How much was it? Thanks, George, I got on Amazon for $14.99. Here's what... Instead of saying how much it costs. You're ruining my thing. Wow, George, I like your watch. Thanks, Rach.

What kind of watch is that, George? This is a Rolex, Rachel. Oh, how do you feel? You want to know where it's from? Where is it from? My wife's deceased grandpa, Rachel. How do you feel now? How much did it cost to repair that watch, George?

About a thousand bucks. Wow. I could have bought a lot of these watches for that. I cut about a lot of Amazon watches. No, I'm just remembering his memory. Okay. But thanks for the reminder, actually. It's very sweet.

It's an heirloom piece to carry the family. The family generation. Heritage. Oh, man. That was a good one. That was funny. I got you, but it was a good one. It was good.

It was a nice attempt. Yeah, I tried. I tried. But this is an awkward one. You know what's funny? There's a comedian I love, Hassan Minhush, and he talks about different cultures. Yeah.

Some want to talk about how much, how expensive something was. Some want to talk about how little something was, and some want to tell you exactly what it cost. So it was a great riff on. on different cultures. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and how people present it in different ways.

Yes, I love it. It's in his latest Netflix special. That's so good. Yeah, well, you know, one thing I will always spend money on, though, George. What's that? Cozy-earst products. That's not a flex. That's just you being bougie.

That is me deciding to have quality in my life and their sheets, their blankets. I mean, everything about their products are amazing. I kind of want to, like, collect them all. Like, I'm just adding to the collection. Yes, I did. I did a bunch of Christmas gifts for people from them. Well, they got such a wide variety.

It's not just bedding and sheets and blankets, but they also have joggers and sweaters and all kinds of things. I mean, it's such good stuff, you guys. The PJs sets, goodness gracious. Yeah, so if you just want some good quality products, make sure to check out Cozy Earth. What's great is they have a 10-year warranty on their betting, which is incredible.

So go to cozyEarth.com slash smart money. And if you put in the promo code, smart money, then you get up to 40% off. Because they love Smart Money Happy Hour listeners. I mean, so great. So go check it out. Now, that's a number I'd share with people. Yeah.

How much was that? I got a 40% off coupon. I got a high quality item at a great bargain. At a great deal. So if you get the post-purched, let them know you heard about Cozy Earth on Smart Money Happy Hour. Okay, next up, we have therapy. Ooh.

This is a conversation grenade for some. It's a little social landmine here. Yeah, this is a generational grenade. The older you are, the more you're confused, why you would pay someone to listen to you. That's how they view it. To tell you your problems. But the younger you are, the more you see the value in this. Totally.

Because your parents are not helpful to share your problems with. I'm just going to say it. That is fair. That is fair, George. And I think it's one of these things you kind of have to experience to see the value of. It's hard to go, oh, I see what happened. And they gave me tools that I can use versus, oh, someone listened to me vent. That's not therapy. No, yeah. And you don't have a great therapist if that's all it is.

Yes. Yeah. You need to be able to, like, navigate. And they ask good questions and make some statements and awareness of like, oh, yeah, that's why I do what I do. The more you know yourself and the more self-aware you are, I think just the healthier you are in life. You don't have to get all great, right?

These conversation grenades. I think the more therapy you do, the less conversation grenades in your life. Because I think you were able to. You just set boundaries to go, I'm not going to step foot in that again. For that, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I will say some people who do therapy, it's like vegans and CrossFit bros. They're like, it's their thing they want to talk about.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fair. Like, oh my gosh, my therapist, and just, I'm like, okay. Okay. We're good. I'm glad you go. Yes. Don't need to bring it up every three seconds. Yeah, that's fair.

That's fair. Ooh, this is a good one. Asking about an ex. Ooh. Do people do that? I don't know. Like, hey, how's your ex doing? Said no one ever.

Said no one ever. No, no. But wouldn't that be so interesting to be a part of that discussion? How your ex is doing? And watching it play out, though? Well, that assumes you're just keeping tabs on your ex, which tells me you're not going to be a place. No, no, you're not part of it, but you're watching the grenade happen between other people. Oh, yeah.

And you're like, I would watch that. I've got to, you know, I'll admit I'm not that great of a person. I would want to see that unfold. That's what I'm saying. That's one that I'd be like, huh. Another one is like when a marriage dissolves, like a divorce, people are very nosy. They want to know, was it a moral failure, what happened, and it's none of your business. Yeah. Unless you're sharing with a friend voluntarily.

Yes. Here's another one. How much are you paying for your kids' school? Listen, Linda, you can Google it. Google it. You can find out online if you want to know. Is it because of private school and how expensive it is and people get nosy of like, did you know that cruises pay $35,000 a year to send Little Amelia? Which you guys are... We're taking the public route. Public school folk.

We pay taxes in the county. We're taking advantage of that. That's always my thought. I have nothing against private school, but I'm like, I'm paying all this money for this thing. I should take advantage of it. I think it all depends on where you live in the school systems. I mean, I really do.

I think. But within that world, which we're not in that world, but I have some friends that are, there's even a hierarchy of that world. Of like the private schools. I'm like, oh, they sent them to that private school? Ooh. Or like, wow, that, I don't know.

There's like a thing there. Don't you think some of it. Just some of it. I get there's legitimate reasons, but some of it is for the parents' reputation. For sure. Kind of like going to a certain college. Yes.

Yes. And some of them are like, okay, they live in an area with rougher schools, and they want their kid to have the best education. So they're willing to pay for the private school. Sure. But we have the privilege of living in a county with some of the best schools. For sure. So I'm like, this school's not good enough for you?

Yeah. Come on. I don't know. I think it's a personal preference idea. I think for some people they do it for like a spiritual sense. Yeah. But there's a lot of judgment. Can I tell you this?

To add to this is the homes. school versus public school or private school. Oh, yeah. The homeschoolers... I feel more judged from homeschoolers these days, where we used to judge them. Love you homeschool moms, but the judgment is strong. It is flipped. We used to judge the homeschoolers, and now...

It's like, oh, you send your kid to a school? They're indocterating your children with the government. Stranger teaching your kids about values and such. This Cole's a great principal. I don't know. I just love our school. I love our school. Love our school.

Yeah. Hate me. People do get mad at me. and I do want to give shout out always to public school teachers because you are not bad people and you're doing a great job. They needed to hear that. They are. Amen.

And homeschool moms, you're doing a great job too. It's not a competition. Private school teachers, amazing. You're doing the most. Well done. All schools, all teachers. Anyone trying to help the next generation just good on you. We love you.

Stop fighting each other. Start fighting a lack of literacy. Let's end on something real light and fun. Politics. the explosion of the grenade occurs. Yep. Like what feels controversial now may not always be this heated.

We got masks from four years ago. You had vaccines. Yes. You had electric cars, for some reason, have become a conversation grenade. Yeah. They think because I have chosen to drive a electric car that I

either want to die in a car fire, hate my family. I am, I hate gas and oil, and I want to see America lose. I don't know. People are just so angry. They get so mad at the electric cars.

Yeah. Who knew? Religious differences. That's a big one. Man, you could put a lot. Yeah, there's a lot. So just current events in politics. A lot in this category.

That's aside from who you voted for and why. Just ask that question. Do you have strong feelings about, I mean, I know you have political feelings, but about people who have strong feelings about politics. How do you deal with those people? No, I do think that, and I genuinely feel this way, when you can't have any level of conversation with somebody, that's the problem today, I think.

Like if you can't hear them out for five minutes without losing your mind? Yes. And can I say this? Have genuine curiosity. Because I think there are people on both sides of the aisle. They have yelled at each other so much. Both sides. Today, I feel like more than ever before. Even in 2020, I mean, I think through all the elections that I've lived through,

this one feels like literally one side. really believes the other side's evil, and the other side really believes the other side really believes. And I'm like, I mean, obviously, he won the popular vote. So he's a little bit more. But overall, it's a pretty split down the middle. And not all of those millions and millions of people that voted either side are not, like, I just don't,

I cannot believe, I can't believe that. I can't believe that. I don't like this moral high horse that I'm better than those people because I voted this. Yes, no, no. So I think. Hate us if you want. Get mad at us if you want.

But I genuinely, genuinely believe that. My favorite is- Because I meet people that have friends on all sides. That have level heads on both sides. I love those people. And you're just like, yeah, I want to hear what you have to say. And both sides are educated in their way. Both have legitimate reason.

I mean, it's not that, oh my gosh, 73 million on this side. I don't know what they're talking about. Or 73 million on this side. I don't know what they're. Like, they have legitimate reasons for both. And you can be a person of character on both sides. Some of my neighbors have the Kamala sign. Some had the Trump sign.

and I would have never known their politics without their little sign out there. But they're all great people. We never talk politics. Yeah, so that's my problem. So I don't get mad with people having opinions. Because I have opinions. Yeah.

There's certain things that I do think, in my opinion, is better than another. I do. But I don't like hold this ground that like I can't have this conversation or not believe that I can learn something too. I want to know where you're coming from because I genuinely could understand that

and that makes me think differently. And that's good. Yes. Ted Lasso, don't be judgmental. Be curious. But man, some people... I just usually avoid it. You're one of the only people

that I can actually talk politics with because it's from a place of curiosity and there's a looseness about it. We're not ever getting heated. And if we can be there, it's fun. It is. Like, we've had fun. We've had some fun discussions with, like, people.

And it's like, oh my gosh. It's great. I don't know. But it is the grenade of the year. 20, 25. If there was going to be an award, that would be it. This would be. it. So, yep, I, uh...

So what are the final takeaways here? Man. I think Golden Rule has to be one. Yes. Treat others as you would want to be treated, 100%. Yeah. And give benefit of the doubt. Be curious, not judgmental. Yes. Not everyone might be as comfortable with a conversation as you might be.

I think that's it too. So be aware of that. Depending on what has happened and either of the... Right, you could take, what were some of ours? Like, yeah, politics. You got... physical appearance, you got money. Like, you never know where people stand in these categories.

And even if you think you know someone, you may not know the full person, right? So don't make assumptions in that way. Another one that has to do with money, don't give unsolicited money advice. Don't talk about money unsolicited. Yes, that's right. It's just a weird one. So unless it comes up from someone else and it's the right conversation,

the right person, the right environment, it's a weird thing to talk about. Yeah. If Brett shows up with this new Jeep, don't be like, oh, did you get payments on that? Like, you don't need to know that. And if they bring it up and tell me and they go, what do you think? I got a lease. I'll give them my honest opinion. That's right.

You can be honest. If they ask, for sure, if they've opened the tour, you're allowed to speak. But if it doesn't affect me, I'm not going to ask questions. You do you. That's good, George. That's good. Next, know your audience. We talked about that.

Yeah, know the audience. And I think you could challenge in life. Do you have people where none of these would be grenades that you could literally throw out topics. That's my dream friend group. Where are these people? I know. Let's see. What else? Man, I think just the older I get, the more tired I am. I'll be honest with you in that. The less energy expenditure I have to give to some of these. Yes, I agree. So the last one I think is boundaries over defensiveness. Like just put up a boundary. You can only control yourself. If you're going through a life change and you know people ask, prepare an answer that you're comfortable with

in advance. Yes. People are going to ask. You can shut it down. You can give a straight answer. Let's practice this in real time. Okay. Maybe you be like the neighborhood, Nosey Nancy. Why couldn't I be Ned? Why you have to make me... Oh, I'll be, oh, I'm sorry. I'll be nosy Ned. Okay, Nosey Ned.

And who are you in this situation? And you're someone non-toxic? And I'm going to practice setting up a boundary with a conversation that I don't want to have. Okay, I'm going to try this on you. Are you Ned? I'm Ned. Okay. Hey, Rachel, you talk about giving an awful lot.

I see your Instagram stories. but how much are you actually giving to charity? What's the like dollar amount you guys give per year? Oh, Ned, you know? We... Did I stumpy on that? No, I just don't want to tell you a specific dollar amount because you don't need to know that.

I don't need to know, I'd like to know. Yeah, you don't want to know that. You don't need to know that. Ned, Ned, Ned. Oh, Ned. Ned. I just... Wow.

She spiraled. You know what I would really say, Ned? God, that's a rude. That's kind of a rude question, Ned. I was just asking my generosity. It's just, since you talk about it so much, I was curious. You know, a truly generous person. How much do you give, Ned?

We give to our local church. We give to nonprofits that we care about. Oh, it depends on the year. Well, what's going on? What did you do this past calendar year? I'd have to get with my tax pro on. that. I don't remember the exact dollar amount. Just give me a range, Ned. See how I flip the tables?

Now, I mean, I'm really good. I'm going to be honest, Rachel. You know, generosity, it's a matter of the heart and it's private for our household. But I just always give what you can. Give a little until you can give a lot. My friend Rachel Cruz says that. I think it's a great quote. You know, and it's a, for me, it's a private thing for us.

And I think everyone should give as much as they are able to. And it's one of the reasons we got out of debt so that we could give more to things that we care about. You could probably give more if you don't have a nice watch like that, Ned. Well, actually, Rachel, this was inherited. That was pretty good. I think I did better. I think I won.

Well, before we spill the tea on guilty as charged, George, this has been fun. But what have we sipped on? This has been a smashing sage spritzer mocktail. So no alcohol in this one, safe for the little ones, if you want to make it for them and make them feel fancy. It costs $2.10 per glass. It's got blackberries, lime juice, honey, coconut water, seltzer, and sage leaves. So good.

extra. What do you rate it? Ten on ten. One of my favorite mottails. It's really good. The flavor's great. It's easy. Light. Yeah. I'm going to give it an eight out of ten. I wish it was a little bit sweeter and also a little bit punchier with the lime juice. It's a little bit light for me. I like a mocktail that would shock me with how punchy it is. So still a great one. Find the recipe in the show notes. Give it a try this weekend. All right. Now it's time for Guilty. As charged. And this is where our producer Kelly gives us a new guilty charge question every week. And if we're guilty, we take a sip.

Kelly. All right. Have you ever said something that shut down a conversation? Oh, man. Oh, boy. I had a moment with a friend a few years ago. I was really deep in my conspiracies, like real deep. And it was like, oh, it sounds terrible.

But it was like about, like, sex trafficking stuff. Like out of D.C., like they were like, yeah, prosecuting people. like it was like a kind of a thing, and then you go deep into, like, what was, what was really happening. And so, oh, man, and I was full on, full on in belief. I mean, I was in, I was. Was it a passionate speech about what was happening?

Oh, oh, yeah. Winston finally was like, I was like, read this. And he finally was like, you got to get out of this whole. Like, what's happening to you? And I was like, oh, my gosh, all this stuff is happening, big in it. And I told one of my friends, I was telling her, and she's like, I just don't know, I don't know. I said, wake up.

Oh, no. You did the wake up line. But this was back like before, this was like pre, pre the wake up line. But I was like, this stuff is happening in all this. And then I had another friend that was like, you know, crimes do happen, Rachel. Like this isn't a cons like, some of it's not a conspiracy. Like things really do happen in life. But yeah, that was one of mine was a friend.

And she was like, wow, wow, Rachel. Did you apologize after or no? Yes. You're like, sorry, got a little fired up there? Got a little worked up, yeah. So that was a shutdown conversation with a friend. We just brought the whole party down. No, no party, just her and I.

Oh, just a solo conversation. I was like, are you not, are you not like freaking out about this? We got to do something. You know, it was one of those like, we're going to charge the hell. Save the kids. Wow. Yeah, I was like, what did you, even if it's true, what are you going to do? I'm not sure.

Report it to the FBI? Yeah, that was supposedly working on it. We don't know. I feel like the person who did the video or the article should have done that. It was an article and a video. There was a lot there. I feel like I only elevate conversations. I never detract.

So it's a weird one for me because I only add social value. I never take away. I'm always keeping the ball in the air in social settings. I think out of like a nervous energy. I don't want the party to die. Have you shut down a room though? Not on purpose. I think with my presence probably and my general just,

ick, but not with something I said out loud. Yes, that's fair. But I am the most likely to, like, throw the grenade and then just kind of, like, back away and watch it unfold. And see what happens. So, but again, I don't shut it down. I just create chaos. There you go.

And watch it all play out. Watch it all burn. Yeah, that's fair. That's fair. Yeah, I'd say most of mine would have been around conspiracies in my world and in my life. Uh-huh. They're so fun, though.

I'd say anytime I talk about the fact that I wipe my dog's butt, That shuts the room down. So I think I am guilty in that regard. Yeah, that's good. That's a good one. No one has questions. They want to just exit this conversation completely. And they're like, we're done.

Yeah, no one's ever curious about that. There's more judgment there. I'm like, well, she has an inverted tail you see. No, no one cares. Okay, well, if you guys want to follow us, make sure to go on TikTok because we're there now, George. We're there at Smart Money Happy Hour. Give us a follow.

Make sure to check us out. And if you want to know how to navigate more of these kind of conversations, check out our episode on awkward money conversations because it's a good one too. Yep, and make sure you subscribe so you don't miss an all new episode of Smart Money Happy Hour.