Smoke Sesh - arrested on 420?! chaos, full moon, & depressive slumps

Episode Date: April 23, 2024

Hello hotties and Happy Tuesday! We have a pretty hectic story time to kick this podcast off on what happened on 420, and how I ended up celebrating... (So sorry this episode looks like its filmed on VHS I had the wrong settings on.. retrograde things) It's a chaotic episode so hold on tight. We also talk the Full Moon in Scorpio happening today and what to expect, finally we get into some questions (If you want a question heavy episode tune into the Patreon Podcast Ep this Thursday and submit your question there patreon.com/smokeseshshawty) Stay in school! Some inspiration to keep you guys motivated to finish the semester strong, staying motivated, confidence in yourself and how to build it, impulsivity this retrograde season, V card, sensitive vs mean, friend fights, how to get the spark back, breaking up, depressive slumps and how to lift yourself out, neighbor crush, addiction, forgiveness, dating older men, spring cleaning, club boyfriends, recipes, binge eating, 50/50 in a relationship, summer fashion, graduation scaries plus much much much much more! Thank you for being here and being you, if you enjoyed this episode follow me on instagram @hannahmarlene to see what im up to and for extra content join the Patreon Club! Love you all so much, happy full moon, chat soon <3 MUAH!

listen everybody needs a fairy godmother you know just somebody to look out for them some people call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sash so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all hello hotties welcome back to another beautiful amazing wonderful slightly hectic and unhinged episode of the podcast i'm so excited to be back with you guys on this beautiful little Tuesday afternoon. I had probably one of the most hectic weekends of my life this weekend. As you can tell from the slightly clickbaity title, listen, listen,

I gotta get you to click. We'll get into that soon. I feel like before we dive right into this podcast we need to take a quick little hit you know set the vibes i know i always say i am against pens i'm against carts as an everyday usage yes yes to make my life a little easier and to not hurt my throat with that many bong rips also to maybe keep this video up on youtube we're gonna go with the pen today so cheers listen i don't know what's in the air recently with all the chaos but I am unsubscribing from it I am just managing the best I really can that's really all you can do let's be real um I as you guys know my 420 I was like I gotta go to my nephew's dance recital so cute he's like two and a half he had his first little like ballet dance recital so me and my

family are gonna go up there celebrate a little bit stay and just spend some family time with my niece and my nephew and my brother um so we were leaving super early on 4 20 on Saturday um I didn't have a lot of time to really pack or anything but also I wanted a little bit of you know some stuff to celebrate so I sent my boyfriend to the dispensary that morning for me and he got me a little package of gummies and then this cart this is sweet sticky melon super yummy 10 out of 10 recommend um I think it was just like the cheapest option that's really all I care for um like let's be honest anyways i sent him to the dispo for me because he's the sweetest human being ever and he was raised right so every time i ask him to do something he just does it he does

it no complaining it just happens which shout out to him he is an angel for that his mother did raise him correctly in that sort of way um thank you for the work she put in so i don't have to um note here's a note for you ladies you should not be raising a grown man uh while you're in your 20s that is not your prerogative that is not your problem to deal with that is his mother's so please do not become a surrogate mother for a grown man psa anyways super yummy 10 out of 10 recommend that's probably what i'll be puffing on today especially because my last couple videos i've just been smoking a little too much um and they did get uh age restricted not demonetized maybe it means the same exact thing i don't really know but on youtube at least it got age restricted so

if you couldn't see the youtube video so sorry go watch it on spotify spotify will literally show you anything no matter what so that is the best place to honestly find this podcast um but as you guys know i was going up to visit family on 420 and just celebrate and experience life it's so nice honestly to get into a new city even if it isn't like a big city place i'm going to milan i'm going to la i'm going to new york i'm like no i'm going to another just like semi-big midwestern town um but still like being able to get out of your local space and get into a new environment and have new experiences in that new environment and try new places and just see the world a little bit it is really nice honestly and it's such a like eye-opener um and provides a little bit of

inspiration which I love so it was kind of nice to be able to do that I ended up getting my own hotel room my parents were like you could stay with us in our hotel room with our dog and I was like you know what sweet I'm not gonna hate on that like at least the type of parents who aren't like you're on your own good luck it's like no we'll try and help you out the best like best we can they also like can't afford to buy me my own hotel room and I'm a full-grown adult so like bitch let me buy my own so I bought my own hotel room and it was a gorgeous hotel um very like historical the sheets were so comfy this was like a feather fucking bed so nice and it's just really nice to kind of I love the activity of staying in a hotel room I love the activity even if you're in

your own city and you just need like a break from life find a cute little hotel book yourself like a one-night stay and just go and escape and like live your best hotel life sleep in these nice clean fresh sheets and take a long ass hot shower and just enjoy life that is honestly one of my favorite ways to kind of escape if you can't like get away for a long time just simply having a night to yourself in a hotel room and getting to live your hotel life fantasies it's really really really nice 10 out of 10 recommend um but anyways let's get into the main story of it all we have this running joke in my family that like how has my how has my dad not been arrested yet like how has he not do you know what i mean and he's not a bad person he is a very upstanding

citizen he is so nice so kind very understanding like honestly the sweetest man i have ever met in my entire life and i'm so lucky to call him my dad but he has this like weird tick where he gets a lot of speeding tickets he gets a lot of like driving tickets whether it's on his motorcycle or it is in a car he gets a lot of them and it's usually either for like oh not maintaining your lane or oh you were speeding or oh you didn't stop at this stop sign completely around us police are very predatory um they have just like way too big of a fucking budget and so there's way too many of them out and they are just constantly on the lookout for the smallest of fucking things and honestly it is a nuisance and it's super annoying because i understand how

these situations can escalate into something that they didn't need to be simply because these police officers have way too much funding and they're way too fucking bored um anyways fuck 12 yeah so he has this habit of just getting speeding tickets but then he doesn't pay them don't ask me why i couldn't tell you it's just like a thing he does i think it might be like adhd avoidance where it's like he knows he has this thing so he just doesn't do it and it's not like he doesn't have the money it's not like he doesn't have the time i think he just thinks the ticket was stupid and he doesn't want to pay it because it's like obviously like a predatory ticket like just a why the fuck did I get this why does it matter anyways multiple times throughout

my life he has had a warrant out for his arrest because if you didn't know if you do not pay your speeding ticket over a certain amount of time or you do not pay your ticket in general for a certain amount of time they will submit a warrant for your arrest that has happened multiple times in my life where he's like oh shit okay i guess i finally gotta pay it because they got a warrant out um it's not for him being like a horrible human being it's literally for him just having a ticket out so you know the morning of i was like joking with my boyfriend i was like oh my god i my dad doesn't have any warrants out like lol i hope he doesn't have any tickets he hasn't paid for and then my parents came and picked me up and my mom was like oh dad shouldn't be driving because

he always gets in trouble you know like i should drive this is so funny like lol what if we get pulled over joking joking joking and about an hour and a half in we're flying down the road we're actually going the speed limit okay we're actually going the speed limit and we pass a state trooper and we see him you know get on the road behind us and we're like okay what's going on lol and we see him you know following behind us and my dad's like fuck he's definitely reading our plates like that's why he is that close behind us but he's like you know i all my plates everything's registered like it's not a big deal or i don't have any tickets out or anything like that so whatever maybe just like a little speeding ticket then my dad's like oh he's putting his hat

on we're about to get pulled over it's like of fucking course of course we're about to get pulled over of course he's about to get another speeding ticket like that is just his mo i don't know what curse was placed on him to get so many tickets maybe it's just the fact that we live in the midwest and the police are handing out tickets left and right and left and right because they have literally nothing else to do and they love making people's lives miserable so we weren't doing anything wrong you're going to speed limit the state trooper just decides to start following us um rents his plates puts his hat on flashes the lights so we pull over um and you know he walks up to the side of the window he's like where are you guys going first of all none of your

business what are you up to first second of all none of your business i'm going to my nephew's dance recital bitch let me go um and he's like okay well i i pulled you guys over because your plate is unregistered like you your registration is not up to date let me just go run um your license it'll be a quick stop no biggie it'll probably just be a warning that you need to get plates updated so then we'll just let you on your way but I do need to go like run your license real quick have my backup check like okay whatever it'll be quick thank god it's just a warning we can get on the way because we were already running late uh for some reason my dad needed to get a haircut right before we left so we were running short on time to make it to this

dance recital we were like no we need to be moving we need to be going police officer's like it'll be quick let me just go check I'll be right back 15 minutes goes by and I'm like oh this is not gonna be quick because if it was gonna be quick it was gonna be quick not 15 fucking minutes like I know how they like to make you sit and wait and kind of get antsy but 15 minutes is too fucking long okay finally he gets out of his car he walks back up to us and he goes are you aware are you aware of this ticket you got five years ago and he was aware he was aware of that ticket but also this ticket was a ticket that he had like been calling about and calling about and trying to get fixed and the county was like we don't know what you're talking about we have

no recollection of that ticket guess what they do because this police officer saw it and noted it okay but he had been trying to get this ticket taken care of um for fucking forever because i have a relative who is in prison lifelong and he can't go see him because of this ticket like the warden of the prison won't let him come visit because of this ticket and he's been trying to get it handled and trying to get it taken off his record or even just like paid for whatever and the city is like we don't know what you're talking about we don't know we can't find it we can't handle it blah blah blah blah blah well guess what they know this state trooper walked up to the window and is like um so yeah are you aware of this ticket that happened five years ago my dad's

like oh fuck yes i'm aware but i've been trying to handle it it's it's been impossible to handle like i have paperwork i have court dates that i've been to to try and get this figured out I have not been able to handle it the state trooper is like well since it has not been handled there is a warrant out for your arrest and I'm gonna need to take you back to Oregon okay let me cut you up my dad also had a ticket that he got in Oregon a state where we were visiting family who lives out there and he got a speeding ticket had that one handled very recently so i was aware of this ticket and when this police officer said oregon i was like holy shit this man's about to drive my dad all the way to oregon and we have to go pick him up

at the sheriff's office in oregon and i said what what do you mean oregon how far is that he's like oh like 15 miles he met oregon county oregon county missouri oh my god i was like we don't have time to drive to oregon today what the fuck are you talking about oregon county so my dad got arrested on 420 and i had to go bail him out happy 420 i have never had to bail anybody out before this better be my one and only situation of ever having to bail anybody out my dad has never been arrested before so that was a fun little family experience for us all to get through first of all you're like okay well you're gonna have to come with me i take my dad out of the car put him in handcuffs

put him in the back seat and the police officer is like so essentially bails like a hundred dollars i have to take him back to the sheriff's department um and you guys have to come bail him out whether it's tomorrow or you follow me there and bail him out either way i have to take him with me and i was like what the actual fuck we are in the middle of nowhere missouri i'm talking like cornfields and long highways there is nothing out here and we end up driving like 30 minutes to this tiny little town in the middle of nowhere okay this sheriff's office was essentially a barn with a steel door on it like if i wanted to break my dad out of there we probably could my brother is calling me like what's happening where are you guys what's going on because my ass took a photo

of my dad and sent it to him no context unfortunately for him just my dad in handcuffs in front of the police car my brother's like what the fuck is going on what is happening calling me calling me i'm like i'm at the atm outside of this biker bar in the middle of fucking nowhere getting cash so i can go bail dad out so hopefully we can make it there in time oh my god oh my god what the fuck is happening it is 2 30 in the afternoon on a saturday anyways got the cash money got in there got my dad out of jail got in the car we did not make it to the dance recital we did not we made it to the end when he was walked across the stage and did his bow but we did not make it to the dance recital shout out to that police officer because

what the actual fuck anyways maybe my dad finally had learned his fucking lesson and maybe i can share with you guys please pay your tickets whether it's a parking ticket a speeding ticket whatever it is please pay it so then you don't find yourself in this position this better be the one and only time i am ever bailing anybody out in my entire life let it be this one experience because probably this is the best bailout experience that anybody could ever have my mom's so fucking funny my dad got in the car and he was obviously stressed um as one would be in that situation and my mom's like do you need a gummy from the back of the car what a real one she's like do you need me to grab you a gummy my dad's like no let's just get on the fucking road

but i'm like wow she rides for him she's offering him an edible after the situation yeah she rides for him um anyways that was my 420 experience not to clickbait you but also like literally arrested on 420 what not on my bingo card of what was going to happen on that day um definitely made the trip way more interesting still haven't quite processed it would like to note that this was a very white person experience this was a very like tame police officer experience and the only reason we experience that is because we are white police officers in the midwest specifically honestly just everywhere are very aggressive when it comes to people of color and i would like to denote that that is so fucked up and the only reason i'm able to sit here and

laugh is because of my privilege you know i of course am aware of that and i also would like to note happy 420 a great non-profit to support especially during this seasonal time where we are enjoying our 420 products while people are literally serving lifelong sentences for it the company's called last prisoner project and their goal is basically to really just reduce weed charges and free people who are completely and utterly in jail for things that are legal now which is not fair whatsoever I donate to them every single season that we experience 420 just because I know that I am privileged enough to sit here and make money off of smoking and hanging out with you guys while there are people who are serving 60 year sentences for doing the same

exact thing and that is so fucked up quickly but if you are looking to maybe donate support uplift organization during this time I think last prisoner project is a great place to kind of reach out and lean towards especially when it comes to decriminalization and making sure that people aren't facing these insane charges for too long and getting the help they need so that they can be free to um but yeah that was wild definitely did not think I was going to experience that one even though we joke about it it's like what are the chances we actually get pulled over and my dad has a warrant at the same time you would think hi with the way i phrased it but also he is usually pretty good about you know oh fuck okay let me take care of this now

maybe it's a little too late but also let's not procrastinate legal things anyways that was fucking crazy we made it to the dance recital experienced that hung out with the kiddos hung out with my brother for a little bit after they went to bed ended up back at the hotel my dad had a couple extra drinks that night to take the edge off he was like do you want to come to the hotel bar i'm here i'm like love you i just ordered taco bell i just ate a gummy and ripped my dab pen I think I'm in for the night that's how I actually celebrated 420 I bailed my dad out of jail and then hung out with my niece and my nephew who are like toddlers and then we went to the hotel I ate a gummy I took a long ass fucking shower and ordered door dash to my hotel directly

to my door shout out to you I always get so worried for like door dash drivers I'm like I don't want to stress them out so I'm just going to throw money at them like I'm sorry I made you get out of your car and walk all the way up to my hotel door but also I'm going to tip you $13 for two items from Taco Bell so it'll be worth it I promise I get like guilty and stressed out about things like that the Taco Bell was mid but it was needed I felt like I needed a simple 420 experience and that was Taco Bell at 11 p.m off an edible what's better than that you know what I mean anyways it was such a hectic week and i also forgot to submit the questionnaire for this week um i woke up this morning i was like oh i gotta do my podcast on my boyfriend then i was like holy

shit i did not post a questionnaire whatsoever so i'm working with what i got had a long story time there for you in the beginning apologies on that but also hey something to fucking talk about wild wild shit i had to go through um the rest of the weekend we went to the zoo and saw some animals saw some sea lions had some good falafel sandwiches and then made our way home um i had dinner with my boyfriend's family last night we just grilled out and spent some time outside it is earth day the day i'm recording so hopefully i'll be able to get outside and enjoy the sunshine maybe stick my toes in some grass enjoy my day you know what i mean what's better than that just kind of get some sun on my skin i'm a little too pale maybe self-tan a little

bit but yeah happy 420 thank you to everybody who watched my 420 vlog hi i hope you enjoyed it i was high as hell putting crazy ass sound effects over it because i was like i love a sound effect i love a you know it makes me giggle you know what's going on in my brain that i can translate through sound and put into a video um so thank you to everybody who watched and supported um it was a super fun vlog i'm hoping to do some more i think my next video is going to be like me completely redecorating my bedroom because it needs some work there's a bed in there but that's about it i'm like we gotta make this like a fun place to chill out so i think i'm gonna do like a little remodel video for you all um but if you want to go see more content from me a 420 vlog is up on

youtube if you want to support me follow me on patreon it's a great way to support me but also like get something out of it get some content out of it sorry to my patrons who i didn't post regularly this weekend obviously it was a little hectic i really apologize for that i am going to get back on the patreon swing this week we have a full moon coming up on wednesday the 23rd i believe so let's get into some lore on that and then we'll get into all your questions april 23rd first of all we're in the middle of a retrograde so this time is all about like transformation um adjustment rolling with the chaos um and i really think that this pink full moon in scorpio um is going to really aid in that especially the transformation part um it'll give us a chance to

shed our old beliefs and incorporate new views into our lives um under this moon we are letting and growing as people which will be hard to which will be hard but also vital for our spiritual path nothing can stay the same forever and the powerful scorpio full moon will rock our worlds for the better by helping us to alter and augment the parts of ourselves that need to shift um the pink moon is named after i know it's named after a flower i think specifically the blooming pink trees that you see everywhere right now um in north america during springtime specifically the moon can sometimes appear to have a pinkish hue because of the particles floating in space that filter certain colors but it will be visible wednesday night april 23rd i think that's a

wednesday let me double check oh my god i'm so dumb april 23rd is literally tuesday wow okay we're in it the full moon is a powerful time for change as scorpio is a transformational sign it pushes our limits deepens our sentiments exposes our fears heightens our intuition and allows us understand ourselves on a deeper level the water sign is co-ruled by action planet mars and evolutionary pluto which will bring out a lot of intensity emotion and desire scorpio full moon is about transcendence and growth however we will feel the need to tug between passion and practicality due to its opposition to the tar sun what we want may differ from what we need but that won't stop us from moving forward this lunation squares pluto and aquarius making an event that will push us to

think differently and break free from the past we will be able to let go of old ways of being thinking and loving in order to embrace a radical perspective that aligns with our current values situations and emotions buried in our subconsciousness might also be come out at this time pluto will stir up past matters and make us confront them and deal with things head on we may decide the best way to handle this is to look at our shadow self and hug it enriching our souls with unconditional love and confidence one thing about scorpio you really need to get comfortable with your shadow side you really need to learn to accept it lift it and love it okay if there's one thing that a scorpio is connected to it's its fucking shadow side let's be real

with the asteroids juno and virgo and vesta and cancer in the mix there is an added need for protection the asteroids may bring out negative emotions such as jealousy aggravation towards those who we think are trying to take credit for our work or id or our ideas this can lead to feelings of resentment and imposter syndrome when we doubt our abilities and feel like frauds remember this is just a passing phase and we should not let these sentiments linger instead we should remind ourselves of our strengths and achievements through positive self-talk and affirmations we are great at what we do and should not let anyone take that away from us another way to combat this vibe is to hold our dreams and aspirations close to our heart we don't have to

share or tell any information to others until it comes to fruition real best piece of advice i can give you you do not need to tell everybody your plans you do not need to tell everybody your secrets if you have something exciting sometimes the best thing you can really do is keep it to yourself to keep it to yourself and keep it close to your heart until it comes to fruition because you really don't know who's a secret hater out there and who will be preying on your downfall and you don't need that extra negative energy also with it comes to scorpio feelings of jealousy and aggravation scorpio mood changes just as quick as the fucking wind so whenever you feel that understand you can release and let go and choose peace always um the scorpio full moon presents an

opportunity for new beginnings it's a time to reflect on our deepest desires and take action towards realizing them self-awareness and passion are key ingredients in manifesting our goals it's important to have faith in ourselves and trust the universe will support us on our journey um with the lyrid meteor shower in effect which i think happened last night we should make a wish on a shooting star to ensure our dreams come true take risks dream big do the best you really can seek peace positivity while also forgiveness and understanding for maybe the darker parts of ourselves literally the way i'm holding this dab pen as a fairy wand is killing me call me fairy smoke mother but happy full moon full moons are not a time for manifestation

um well maybe this one new moons are usually the time for manifestation full moons are usually the time for reflection and understanding and kind of doing that internal works the external is easier i think that kind of also aids in the process of manifestation so if there's any untapped energy that you haven't really addressed in your life that will make your life easier if you just face it head on and handle it um such as my dad getting arrested and finally getting to figure out this fucking ticket just handle it before shit gets out of control you know what i mean that's probably the best piece of advice i can really give you for this week handle your shit apologize think feel so your internal world doesn't become so chaotic that your external world also becomes

chaotic handle your shit focus on yourself dream big follow your goals don't give up on yourself happy full moon with that being said let's get into some of our questions once again i'm so sorry i uploaded the questionnaire so late i really apologize for that one really apologize once again you gotta go with the flow you really gotta just forgive understand keep pushing especially during the chaos of the mercury retrograde era let's get into it please give me motivation to get through finals listen it's hard but you just gotta fucking do it you're gonna feel so good you're gonna feel like you literally just took a bump of fucking coke like rolling on molly once you finish those finals so just see it through persevere remember to eat and hydrate

remember to get good sleep if you're not sleeping your brain's not retaining information but you will get through it and you will be better for it and whether you do good or not at least it's done and you're gonna feel so much better also guess what when you finish it's literally summer break so what's better than that what a better way to celebrate anything than by having summer break directly after it you're gonna be out enjoying living not having to hopefully do as much school work during the summer if any so find peace and understanding in that and understand that getting through hard times is never going to be easy but you will always be better for it so stay hot stay sexy stay educated okay tips on keeping yourself disciplined for gym goals senioritis etc um once

again i feel like with discipline it takes a little bit of time and resilience for you to see the actual benefits from it but once you do something and you stay disciplined for a while you will start feeling and understanding how good it actually is and how nice it actually is to stand by your side and get shit done but the way to keep yourself disciplined to keep it rolling i think is to when you're doing these things you have to be doing them for yourself not another person when you're doing it for another person they're going to be pretty hard to complete so do it in the framework of standing by yourself and staying passionate towards yourself and once again I think the best tip I can really give anybody for discipline is never skip more than one day

in a row you can always have a day off you can always take a break that is totally fine but once you do it for more than one day like if you do it two days in a row or three days in a row it's gonna be really hard to get back on the bandwagon than if you just gave yourself that one day to rest actually took that one day to rest and then continued it um best way to stay disciplined is to really just stay on track give yourself adequate breaks and don't take a break for too long how to be effortlessly confident in life choices even when going against society you really have to just adopt I don't give a fuck mentality I wish I found way more satisfaction in like just going with what society does and the life choices that are basically set up for us but unfortunately

that just seems really boring to me and I always have to choose the most difficult path possible for some reason I don't know maybe I like being the victim but when you are going against like a societal choice or you're going again for your dreams maybe it's not something that other people would do maybe it's a little out there whatever you have to own it you have to act in accordance to who you truly are so then when people start questioning you or you start getting weird looks or whatever you don't feel the shame because you know you are acting in direct accordance of what is good for you the confidence that comes from believing in yourself will outweigh any sort of negativity that people can cut that people can put on you like someone could look at

me and be like oh you have a podcast it's so embarrassing and i'm like well you're miserable with your two children and your ugly husband that you want to divorce but you can't because you don't have a job and i have a podcast that i enjoy doing every week so who's on the up you know what i mean that really wasn't directed at anybody particularly just a fantasy of mine um but yeah the effortlessly confident feeling comes from a piece of understanding yourself always and sure even when you're like feeling the pressure of other people's perspectives you still have that like rock solid feeling of but this is who i am and this is what i want to do and i find peace in that but think about cutting off all my hair um and buzzing it to diet platinum white should i

i mean fuck it actually i do not think you should make any hair changes at all during mercury retrograde my hair's getting a little dark i really want to lighten the blonde but i know that you should never change anything about your appearance during a mercury retrograde so i'm taking that advice and i'm waiting because the impulsivity is high right now a lot of people are making choices that maybe they wouldn't naturally make that maybe they're not thinking it through enough being a little too impulsive i love impulsivity but when it comes to your appearance and something that maybe you can't just like fix really quickly i would recommend just pausing and waiting until mercury retrograde is over and until this full moon is over but once

it's over and you still want to buzz your head and die a platinum bond go for it go for it because i will be dying my hair after this retrograde trust me trust me i just don't want to like fuck it up because i feel like the pressure is there someone said i lost my v card on 420 after the edibles me and this girl took in a taco bell bathroom wore off anywho am i supposed to tell her that this was my first time please help illy um no i say if it's already happened no need to tell her unless it's like a lol funny that was my first time but congratulations happy 420 i stand my ground to get called sensitive is it sensitivity to expect respect to certain people it'll be sensitivity but to the right people it won't um so if people are calling you sensitive because

you're standing your boundaries or you don't want to be disrespected they are not the right people to be around you and they don't care about your feelings and they just want to do whatever they want and say whatever they want without any sort of um repercussions and now they're facing the repercussions because you're telling them that hey you can't do that so i say sure maybe you are sensitive but also maybe they're being a fucking dick and they shouldn't be so fucking mean and yes i'm going to be sensitive when you're disrespecting me so just don't fucking disrespect to me and i won't be sensitive so so so simple um i used to have a boyfriend who was like you're so sensitive why are you crying all the time maybe because you're calling me ugly and

spitting in my face not actually but like metaphorically and guess what i'm not sensitive anymore because i don't have a mean person walking around me all the time being rude to me so get rid of them i've only been listening to the broadcast oh i love you i love your energy it's everything to me um but my question is how do i deal with being on like in between drama with two friends like two close friends of mine because neither of them like write about the situation neither of them have gone about it in the right way and i've expressed my discomfort being in the middle of it and only one of my friends has acknowledged it i'm like i just don't know what i'm supposed to do with it do you know i mean how am i supposed to advise like both of them without

stepping on like each other's toes do you know i mean thank you i love you for some reason i'm like a professional mediator i'm always like the middleman in all the fights um i'm never wrong no i'm kidding i'm kidding i think it's just like my gemini personality i always see every single side and i'm usually like no both of you are wrong and you need to fucking apologize i remember one time the the only time my little friend group has really gotten in a fight was in high school not really in high school maybe like late middle school none of us had really done anything really sexual anyways my poor little friend she gets vulnerable in the group chat we're like 13 i don't know how old we are and she's like you guys i suck dick for the first time and instead of

being good friends like we should have been um my friends were like i think we're a little too young for that like completely shamed her and i had to be the middleman of this of her who was obviously mad and felt unsupported by her friends because i mean we weren't like that young you know what i mean you have to have an experience at some point might as well be supportive and then the friends who were like she's too young for that like kind of being weird about it i had to be in the middle and i had to get these people together and be like first of all you're all being stupid we're friends we should be supporting each other i'm tired of sitting here and watching you guys bicker over something that's just dumb and stupid uh why don't you all apologize to each other and we move

forward like friends should be sometimes when you're the middleman you really just have to take on the role of like mother to all of you and sit your asses down and force you guys to just get over it like get over it because I don't want to be the middleman anymore like there's only so long that you can play the middleman until you're like I'm over it this is so fucking dumb you two need to move on with your lives or I'm going to stop talking to both of you and here's the thing as a friend you shouldn't feel afraid to do that in a friend group there should be space and like openness to be able to voice your concerns and voice your opinions and you should be able to sit down with your friends and be like you two are being dumb get it together this is how I view it

I need you guys to view it that same way because I'm tired of you guys bickering when you guys should be friends right now so let's move forward and as a middleman sometimes you just got to sit them down and be brutally honest you know what I mean so I'd say that's what I would recommend doing especially if you're just like over it like sit them down and be like girls you guys need to handle this right here right now this is a friendship intervention let's get through it oh someone said I've been with my boyfriend for six years officially tomorrow how do we get our spark back I mean it's your anniversary go do something fun go book a hotel room and then just like get your favorite food and just veg out all night in a hotel room just celebrating together

I feel like it's really important especially in relationships to celebrate and I'm not talking month-aversary oh my god one week-aversary oh my gosh every year-aversary I mean that's cool at all and like amazing and at least you have a date to be able to celebrate on thus the idea of anniversary important okay but i think in relationships it's just more important to celebrate the every day in order to keep that spark alive and to find small ways to celebrate even if it's just like oh let's go enjoy this afternoon together because our days are happening to happening to mesh up and we have a free moment and the sun's out like let's just go lay in the grass together and spend time or like oh maybe we don't have to go into work so early tomorrow

this morning so we're gonna lay in bed and cuddle a little bit extra and just celebrate that moment together maybe your moment is like oh we're gonna cook dinner together and just hang out and listen to our favorite music and stuff like that it's all about celebrating the small things together not necessarily waiting until the big things to celebrate because i think a lot of people in relationships don't celebrate the small things and then only celebrate each other once a year which is not enough we should be celebrating every moment we have with that person and guess what if you don't want to celebrate that every moment with that person they're not the right person another relationship question my boyfriend and i's relationship is going flat but our anniversary is

this weekend and i graduate soon with his family coming do i wait and try to find the perfect time or just do it we're also long distance so the weekends are only left it's such a crazy busy time and i am stressing okay first of all is your is his family coming to celebrate you or are you both graduating and his family is coming because he's graduating too whatever is if his family is coming into town to celebrate you do not break up with this man this weekend because i feel like this is what you're wanting to do i would say wait till the family's gone okay don't do it before because they just wasted money to come up and see you celebrate enjoy laugh smile and then i say if you don't have a good time this weekend that's when you have that private conversation with him

alone away from the family maybe on the next weekend and be like hey i don't think this is working love you but we gotta move on whatever it is don't be too harsh about it but i don't think this weekend with you graduating is the weekend to add extra stress on um i understand sometimes when you break up with somebody you gotta rip the band-aid off so if you find a perfect moment go for it but also with the family in town seems seems a little hectic you know what I mean I mean I guess at least his family's in town so then they can help him but also I feel like breakup should be a private matter you know how to get my shit together after being stuck in a depressive slump okay so when you're in depressive stump slump it feels like everything's

piling on and piling on and piling on and all of a sudden it's way too piled and you can't get out from under it it's like the princess and the pea but you're the pea and there's a bitch laying on top of you on top of a hundred fucking mattresses and you don't know how to get the fuck out of and you're getting squished okay so you got to work one mattress at a time let's a get out of bed step one let's get out of bed let's go to the bathroom fuck the clothes on the floor fuck the dirty dishes let's get out of bed let's drink a glass of water okay turn on the shower get in the shower first step when it comes to a depressive slump you have to you can't negate the physical. The physical needs to be taken care of before you can get to the mental, okay? You

need a fresh shower. You need to clean your hair. You need to brush your teeth. You need to drink a glass of water, okay? Feed yourself. You don't have to go cook. That could be a lot. Feed yourself something. Make sure you're eating. Then you need to deal with the outside physical such as your space. Put your laundry into the laundry machine. Put your dishes into the dishwasher. Throw your trash away you will feel through these like subliminal actions you're technically taking care of yourself but also you're not having to address the hard things quite yet but you're getting into the routine of feeling comfortable taking care with care of yourself it's way easier to do with the physical than it is to deal with the mental so start with the physical first okay

the hardest step is simply going to be starting but once you start you won't be able to stop so please i'm begging one step at a time start with the physical bodily care feeding yourself take care of your physical and then you can get to the mental maybe we need to go get serious help maybe we need to call our therapist whatever it may be um maybe it's like okay i gotta get these here's my brain dump of all the tasks i need to get done that are stressing me out we're gonna just do it one at a time slowly get through it do it at your own pace i understand depressive slumps are hard a lot of it comes with just like you feel out of routine with taking care of yourself and also maybe there's a lot of things going on in your life that you feel out of control

of but start with what you can control and work your way up from there it's a great way to kind of redirect and reorganize that care that idea of care for yourself the little things are easy to accomplish once you realize the little things are easy to accomplish the bigger things will be easier to break down and accomplish as well so take your time do it at your own pace start small work big you can get through it i pinky promise trust someone said i have a crush on a hot guy in my building how do i make this happen help omg he's so cute if you have an elevator just like jump in the elevator at some point when you guys are alone oh where are you going oh let's go together really just like putting yourself out there like f it i mean i think if you really want

to like work it up you can like hop in the elevator like make small conversation a couple times you know like running oh running hey how's your day going good to see you have a good day bye oh what are you up to today oh sounds so fun okay i gotta go bye like do that a couple times and then finally be like hey i made dinner you want to come over you know be like hey fuck it here's my phone number if you ever want a home-cooked meal not too far i don't know get crazy with it you know what i mean i love the crush psychosis because you can literally just be a person you're not and then like step into that those shoes like that dream girl okay so when you do those crazy actions it doesn't feel as like outside of your body and more so like you oh my gosh someone said six months

sober from the snowflake emoji okay the coke experiences slash thoughts it totally ruined my whole life for a while real real real and this is why i will always say do not do cocaine do not do cocaine it is not worth it whatsoever it is such a white person drug such a party drug that is just not worth it at all and trust me i'm like a drug connoisseur i've had a few in my lifetime i've also been addicted to things before and i understand how slippery of a slope it can be so i mean i'm never like recommending anything on here but i'm definitely not recommending that one that's for sure i say if any drug needed to be wiped off the face of the planet i mean like obviously like fentanyl the bad ones but if we're talking like the most commonly used ones i think

coke needs to go immediately immediately it's so expensive it doesn't feel good um like literally there's no euphoric effect it's just like you feel like you're gonna have a fucking heart attack and your mind's going a million miles per hour which could be great when you're going on no sleep and just constantly partying all the time but like also babe take a nap you'll feel better not worth it such a slippery slope you feel like you need more and more and more because it starts lessening like it's a fact your body gets used to it um and then you feel like you can't act normally without it because it's so addicting uh not worth it at all i'm so glad you're clean off of it that is it's always so scary to get addicted to a drug because you feel like so out of control of your

body and i hate feeling like a slave to something like i need need need this so if you can avoid drugs at all costs i would recommend that but also if you find yourself like having that slippery slope stop sooner rather than later it feels impossible to be able to stop sometimes but um trust in yourself trust in the people around you also i do think that when you are finding yourself in a position where you're becoming addicted to something you're constantly using something that you don't want to take a look at the people around you and take a look of at the things that you're doing um I had to come to a realization that the people around me should listen they're party people they were good people they were just having their fun time and that's

fantastic but I could not keep doing that anymore and I had to completely change up my circle um change up who I hung out with what I did and that's why I spent so much time inside because I have an addictive personality and I can't there's a stopping you know what I mean there is no just like I'm gonna have one I'm gonna have one drink I'm gonna have like you know just like one chill one night out no that's just like isn't not a thing for me and it's something I had to learn the hard way um and I had to realize I can't be around these people because they're constantly gonna want to do this and it'll constantly be in my life and I won't be able to say no and I understand that and I know that about myself so I don't put myself in those situations

um that's why I love being inside I love just like being alone my little my little weed pen my little bong and just chilling and listening to good music having some coffee at home what's better than that I mean I leave the fucking house my dad gets arrested so it's like I'll stay here please and thank you but I'm proud of you for quitting stay strong make the necessary changes in your life to be the person you want to be someone said older guy broke it off because of my age now i'm heartbroken need to get over him asap well he's old so probably be dead soon find peace in that someone said how to know if you can let people back into your life love the pod they have to prove it to you there is not like a i know it's

a i see they've it's obvious to me that they've changed and they've grown and they want to do better and I am now going to open the gates for you it's not a oh should I take the risk there shouldn't be a risk I mean it'll feel like a little bit of a risk because they hurt you but there shouldn't be a risk because they should have proven to you that they can be trusted again if it's an ex do not let them back into your life someone said any spring cleaning and moving advice tips would be highly appreciated um the only tip that I can really give you that I've been giving myself right now is this is not a time for buying and spending this is a time for preening and getting things out of your fucking house okay get rid of those old clothes get rid

of those old that old furniture get rid of those random things clean clean clean in that sort of sense like purge this is the time to do it because spring you're probably going to collect a lot of items you're going to be pretty busy especially with summertime coming around so i say just get your home in order so then you can have the most fun you can possible this summer um when it comes to spring cleaning I always take one day to just like okay we are in the depths of it I'm turning on a podcast I'm turning on a tv show I'm on my hands and my knees scrubbing the baseboards I'm cleaning the walls I'm dusting the fans you know I'm taking things to the trash I'm getting rid of it I'm selling things I'm uploading them on depop that's what spring cleaning is all about

because I know I won't have the time this summer to do it so better early so then I can have the most fun possible this summer and just live my best hawk girl life sometimes y'all do the hard things early so then your life's easier in the long run hi hannah i hope you're doing well i love the podcast my question is about a guy a man uh we met at the club saturday a lot of sexual chemistry like a lot a lot um we didn't do anything out of line there but how can i make sure if i would want a casual physical relationship with him or a more deeper relationship with him um because right now when i think about like the stuff that we did i'm not going to get into the um but like i can easily get hot based off that um but i don't know i don't think i'm emotionally

prepared for just a physical relationship if you get what i'm saying i'm a very i'm a lover girl so can you please help oh okay okay hot little steamy club interaction they also said and said advice for lover girl who's never been in a relationship um casual physical relationship or a deeper connection with a man you met at a club do not fall in love with a man you meet at the club ever unless you want to be completely and utterly heartbroken that is my only advice he's at the club for a reason and it's not to fall in love you're at the club for a reason and it's definitely not to fall in love it's to make out have fun move on that's what the club's for so a pro tip as a you a lover girl let me protect you do not fall in love with that man in fact you

had a fun little fling and that's cute and that's fine you don't need to commit to him just because you had a sexual experience with him like you experienced a fun sexual experience now let's move forward and move on and find someone who's actually worth spending time around someone who's actually worth falling in love with because a club man will not be that person for you i will tell you that protect yourself save yourself go out have fun flirt it up meet a new club boyfriend you know get a new club boyfriend every week but just because you had one experience with somebody doesn't mean you owe them anything else or they owe you anything else like have your fun little make out and move on with life that's kind of what the casualness of

it all is all about because i guarantee that's exactly all he thought about it as which is i just want to make out with a girl right here right now you are perfect let's get it on and then let me get on with my night that's kind of how you got to view it just to protect yourself a real man who you will fall in love with will not be at a club that's for sure someone said sticky mango rice tutorial babe um actually this uh week on instagram i'm making these like whipped cream mango pancakes not really pancakes kind of like sandwiches so follow instagram at hannah marlene if you want to see that recipe i made scooby-doo sandwiches last week which was so fucking fun i've been having a blast with these recipes because listen once again i am inside

and i love food and i love smoking so this is like a nice conglomerate of all of it um but yeah i'm making a mango whipped cream sandwich situation so follow the instagram you'll see the recipe there speaking of someone said the munchies have me in a choke hold and i always end up feeling like garbage after help um my go-to munchies are like i do like a snack bowl in a sense so then i'm not just like facing a whole family size pack of double stuffed oreos to the dome and then waking up the next day feeling like a double stuffed oreo um so i recommend a snack bowl go out buy your favorite snacks whatever they are those gummy bears those gummy worms fresh fruit maybe it's uh cheez-its i don't know these are just things that are coming to my head uh

goldfish oh my god the goldfish flavor extreme oh i haven't had those in a while adding those to the grocery list asap but go out buy your favorite snacks and then you just do a conglomerate snack bowl okay you're gonna have your little bowl your tiny little snack bowl and you're gonna fill it with a little bit of your favorite thing so like take like two gummy worms take like a little small handful of goldfish take a couple oreos and then you're gonna have a little bit of everything so when you but it's in a small bowl so you're not eating like a shit ton of snacks um and then when you sit down you have your bowl you're gonna feel satisfied because you got a little bit of everything that's kind of something i've learned about feeling especially in the past having like

a binge eating issue a restricting and then binging issue it was like i wasn't allowing myself to have the things that i genuinely enjoyed and so i'd wait wait wait wait and then i would break and i'd snap and then i would just eat so much of it life is about indulgences you are allowed to have that chocolate you are allowed to have that pizza you are allowed to have that good yummy food that you've been thinking about if you have it now you'll be able to eat however much satisfies you and then you won't be binging in the future because you allowed yourself to have that thing and you ate until you were satisfied life is about enjoying food allow yourself to enjoy it but you don't need to push off pleasure because you're going to indulge

eventually so why not do it now and do it in a rational healthy way i allow myself to have my snacks i allow myself to have my gummy worms my cheese it's whatever it is it's just if i don't allow myself to do that then i will fall into a binge eating restricting binge eating restricting cycle um and that is a really not healthy place for me to be so something i've really been focusing on when it comes to nutrition and eating and getting my my snackies and my cravings in and my munchies is allowing myself to have it but only eating until i'm satisfied because that's what life's about you know what i mean literally that scooby-doo sandwich fed me for days when i tell you me and my boyfriend ate that sandwich for like four days in a row someone said 50 50 a man should

provide girl boss what's your thoughts in this economy i will be pro 50 50 but also like 50 50 is not what you're thinking about i feel like in a relationship you guys are going to have to give and take here and there maybe your man pays for everything but then you stay home you cook you take care of the kids that's still a 50 50 relationship even though your man is a full provider financially you are a full provider of the house so that's still a 50 50 relationship i think people are just getting confused and they don't really know what the fuck they're talking about a relationship should always be 50 50 if it's 100 on one side and zero percent on the other it's not a relationship you know whether it's financially in the home taking care of things

like what if your man was like no but i went i went and worked eight hours so you gotta go do all the dishes and you gotta vacuum and you gotta mop and you gotta clean the floor and you gotta take care of my shoes and oh but you gotta i need a massage after work bitch i kill myself i don't know if i can say that online bitch i'd kms okay so it's all about what you want in a relationship and making it work for you i also maybe think i guess love relationship isn't really 50 50 it should be 100 100 always because you should be 100 enthusiastic 100 into them 100 providing whether it's love care nutrition whatever is for your partner and they should be doing the exact same for you and when you're not at 100 the other person should pick up on

the other 20 30 that you're maybe missing out of maybe you're having an off day whatever that's what relationship is about i don't give a fuck about the finances as long as you both are making money and working and paying the rent that's all i literally fucking care about um and i don't think women should be financially dependent on men that is such a 50s thing and that is why so many women found themselves in relationships that they hated but couldn't leave they didn't set themselves up financially uh for a future and so they feel like they do not have any freedom and cannot leave this man i never want you to feel financially trapped to a man ever in your life so get your fucking money up stay in school stay educated follow your dreams do not follow that man okay summer style

someone said what are your go-to summer fits and what are your staple pieces you need to have a conglomerate of just tank tops short sleeve shirts depending on how hot it gets i love just a good plain shirt i feel like a crazy shirt is sometimes hard to pair but crazy pants are easier to match to a plain shirt do you know what i mean so lots of short sleeves lots of tank tops i'm gonna be wearing a lot of shorts this summer a lot of denim shorts especially now that i can Work, uh in whatever I want at my other job. It's so fucking nice Lots of shorts lots of flowy skirts silk dresses lots of floral 90s dresses lots of slides I think i'm not going to be wearing a lot of tennis shoes this summer

I wore a lot of like fun tennis shoes last summer But I think this summer is all going to be about like a kitten heel A vintage slide. I want to purchase some like birkenstock bostons for this summer something easy to just throw on and something easy to take off most importantly lots of jewelry i think this is going to be a big jewelry summer for me whether it's a bunch of necklaces a bunch of earrings um fun hairstyles i'm trying to get into some more of that especially just to get my hair out of my face and to make sure it's not so fucking crazy because i have so much of it and it likes to just get matted if i wear it down for some reason so lots of fun hairstyles braids basket bags are going to be really in this summer

i have been carrying my basket bag around with me everywhere um i got it from urban outfitters it's super cute i'm pretty sure they still have it honestly it was really cheap compared to the vintage ones i was looking at online and it's held up pretty well um but it's easy to just throw everything in like i had an extra outfit a bottle of wine my keys my sunglasses everything in there and i just like threw it on my arm carried it around perfect fantastic 10 out of 10 recommend yeah very simple light flowy light colors that's kind of what I'm leaning towards let's see yellows whites reds greens very like all-american midwestern cut off short summer in my opinion someone said I'm about to graduate college and I don't know what to do after that that's okay

the whole world is opening itself up to you opportunities are opening itself up to you this moment you finally finished school you finally finished things that were set ahead for you assignments classes courses tests and now the world is your oyster you can do anything you possibly want of course it's going to feel a little anxiety inducing because oh my god i have to choose you're telling me i have to choose something you don't have to choose one thing i think the best thing for you to do especially now the world is opening up for you is to try as many things as you possibly can go out get as many internships as you possibly can yeah it's going to suck some of them you're going to hate that's okay you don't have to stay there forever

um you have to go out and you got to try different things get new things under your belt build up your portfolio build up your resume so then you can work your way up to a place that you really really enjoy but you're not going to figure out that place you really really enjoy until you try different things whether it's like a small little part-time job at this one store or this one law firm I don't know what you're doing okay but whether it's like a small internship a small job part-time whether you stay there for four months or stay there for a week go out go try that's what the world is about if you don't know who you are in relation to the world you need to interact with the world in order to build relation to it do you know what I mean I feel like a lot

of people find themselves feeling lost or unsure especially after college and it's because of course the world that was set up for you you have completed now you are forced to make your own way in the world to make your own decisions to try different things and you will never figure out what you're meant to do or where you're meant to be unless you simply put yourself out there and try and i understand people get a lot of like imposter syndrome i think when you're getting imposter syndrome you just sometimes have to step into a different version of yourself um step into like this bad boss confident bitch mentality put on that hat to kind of cover up the imposter syndrome and enact in a way that you truly would act um and allow yourself to experience good

things i think a lot of imposter syndrome is simply this is something new for you to experience don't block your blessings you know what i mean anyways sorry this one's a little shorter once again i forgot to submit questions but hopefully this provided you a little inspiration maybe a little laugh at the chaos that i experienced this week um i love you all so much if you do have any other questions and you want to join the patreon i will be putting a patreon only podcast up on thursday if you want to smoke with me get your question answered come see me there if not i will be here again next week don't you worry but happy earth day i'm going to get outside i'm going to try and get some sunshine on my skin put my toes in some dirt that's what this day is all really

about uplifting supporting um and indulging on this beautiful life that we get to experience right in front of us take advantage of what you have and try to truly live the best life you possibly can but i love you all so much thank you for being here for me thank you for showing up for me every week i hope you had a little laugh during this podcast gotta enjoy your day um and with that being said i will see you all next week Thank you.