Smoke Sesh - back 2 school, breakup szn & balancing energy

Episode Date: July 25, 2023

Hellooo hotties of the universe so happy to be back with another amazing episode of the pod, today I chat ab the abundance of energy in the air right now this Leo season, we smoke a lil to get our mind right & we dive into some questions!! What I’ve been up to, Barbie movie, coworker crushes, stoner girl skincare & getting rid of the nicotine, Dab 101, finding independence in codependency, what’s in the air? And why is everyone breaking up right now, being honest with your therapist, back 2 school tips and tricks, being alone! And balancing energy, gynecologists.. they don’t have to be so scary! Summer bummer and seasonal depression tips, confidence in clothing & being yourself, long distance friendships, allowing yourself to be cringe & chaotic, dressing for the vibe, high concert etiquette, social battery, toxic relationships, healthy routines & much much more ! Can’t wait to see you all again next week for our annual confessionals episode, if you want to see what I’ve been up to follow me on instagram @ hannahmarlene and I’ll see you all soon! MUAH!

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash. So come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life. The good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing, I've got a story for it all. Oh wow, hello, good morning, how the hell are we all doing this week? hotties of the world i hope you all are feeling the baddest the best you've ever felt the hottest because my god it is fucking hot out like i don't remember it being this hot

in the midwest growing up but it's like 10 a.m and it's like 105 out and i am just shocked like how am I supposed to leave the house I was walking into work yesterday and walking from the parking lot to the front door like maybe 30 feet I was like holy shit I'm gonna pass out I'm gonna pass out anyways happy Leo season to all my Leo baddies there really is an abundance of energy in the air right now and I am trying to take advantage of it the best I can I woke up yesterday i don't know what was going on woke up didn't even have coffee immediately started tiling my kitchen like baby pink it looks so good i have like the cutest pink backsplash i just got like sticky tile off of amazon because i'm renting oh my god took me like an hour i was like wow

i didn't even need to inject my veins with caffeine like i just woke up and started doing this amazing incredible today i woke up i did have coffee this time but my boyfriend's moving in so we are trying to figure out our closet situation because if there's one thing about me it's i have way too many fucking clothes and i need every closet possible and when you live in a you know a home that is a historical building you know built in the 1900s where they owned like four different dresses there's not a lot of closet space so we're basically converting or I'm converting the extra bedroom into my dream Barbie walk-in closet um and yeah I woke up this morning started putting together some clothing um organizers some storage units

folding stuff up hanging it up getting it organized felt good feel like I've been a little productive today it's been a blast also sorry if i sound a little stuffy um after my two-week bender my god of just drinking partying drinking partying minimal sleep lots of fun not a lot of drugs didn't really want to include that but lots of drinking lots of partying my body is finally like girl baby girl we we need to rest and when i get that way uh i immediately catch a cold like my body's like we're gonna get you sick so when you remember that your body needs like time to heal and then you'll focus on it because you'll be a little bit in pain so if i sound a little stuffy today apologies love you all uh i'm gonna get through this and i hope you

can get through it with me but my god with that being said let's just set the vibes right i'm loading a bowl right now if you would like to join me let's smoke a little bit on this beautiful tuesday morning let's get in the right mood and today i really want to get through as many questions as i possibly can as you guys know that is always my goal uh my brain sometimes gets a little sidetracked as does everyone's especially if you have ADHD and I get a little distracted so apologies on that but hopefully I'll be able to get to all of your questions because there are so many good ones this week and I really want to touch on so many different topics but with that being said let's cheers

oh that was yummy plans for the day get a little high clean up my house hang out in bed with my jelly cats you can never be alone if you just have cute little stuffed plush animals um surrounding you at all times and jellycats are ultimately my favorite both of which my boyfriend have got for me shout out but i have a little avocado man and they have a monstera like leaf like a big monstera leaf and they're so cute just kicking it in bed for now it's a little cloudy out trying to avoid the heat hoping it'll kind of settle down by this afternoon because i really want to go to the river and if i get out into the forest it gets really damp and hot and sweaty really quickly um so i'm hoping to minimize that the best i can

um yeah just trying to organize my house i want to go to this bookstore near my place as well it's so funny when your friends come into town you really realize like how much of your city you're taking for granted because it's so new to them and they want to experience everything i'll be like yeah i've been there but i don't really go back again when in reality these places are like pretty fucking fun the first one is this bookstore called prospero's bookstore it literally feels like you walked into the haunted mansion and like all the walls are lined with books and some old man and his cat own it like it's beautiful it's amazing cheapest books amazing collection all like one of a kind it's not like a barnes and noble where there's multiple

copies of all the most popular books it's like no you walk in and you find the weirdest shit possible and it inspires you a little bit so i'm gonna hopefully go there and find some fun coffee table books because oh my god i'm an adult now and when i throw events in my house and i have friends over and i have people over and they're sitting down in my living room i want them to if they're having an awkward moment maybe they're a little too high they don't know who to chat with i want them to look down and see a collection of the weirdest fucking books ever that everybody will want to pick up and at least flip through um right now i have a amazing collection of playboys i'm starting my collection of high times magazines i want to get some like

palmistry and astrology books i have one that is about like compatibility that's amazing i got that one at half price books which love half price books um i want to get some like trippy art books some interior design throw in some like Amy Winehouse memoirs maybe some like Marilyn Monroe like I want fun things I want art and that also comes in the shape and form of books so I'm gonna go there because she went there she's like I got 10 books for like $20 it's like oh I totally forgot about this place I'm absolutely gonna have to go back um so that is on my list the river is on my list later in the day if it cools off there's just nothing more healing than like laying in the sun with my titties out smoking a joint so that is of course on my to-do list on my day off um and then

what else i really think that's it it is a chill day for hannah hang out with you guys i'm sitting in my comfy bed right now with my pink blankets my jelly cats my coffee next to me what's better than that amazing day let's get into it all your questions your deepest darkest secrets desires interests i am ready to hear about it all uh someone said did you watch barbie i did i did my boyfriend took me thursday night it's like the day before it came out we didn't realize his co-worker was going so he was like oh yeah we should probably go we have nothing else going on tonight and we went and it was so good it was amazing i was like why am i crying multiple times like this will definitely be a movie that i go back to and will re-watch whenever i need like a

good nostalgic giggle slash cry moment like i love the subtle existentialism i'm not gonna spoil it for anybody oh sorry but it's good it's fantastic i had a great time margot robbie's amazing all the actors are amazing the kennergy was off the charts um and yeah it really just made me nostalgic for being a little girl and letting that humanness live on within us you know it's a it's a great message it's definitely worth seeing someone said co-worker crush no girl no no no no no you never shit where you sleep or is it you never shit where you eat either fucking way the saying still goes your life will be so much easier when your money and your love are completely separate completely separate

because do you know how much drama i have witnessed in the restaurant industry of people like sleeping together and then kind of getting involved and then it all completely falling apart and now every fucking shift i have with them is so goddamn uncomfortable and like if it's uncomfortable for me i can only fucking imagine how uncomfortable it is for them just avoid the drama the only reason you have a crush on them is because you're spending a lot of time with them which like duh you're at work but you could be spending a lot of time with literally anybody so you might as well keep your money separate if you like are interested you know maybe wait until they move jobs or you move jobs or something of the sort but every single

relationship that i have seen happen within the co-worker space i it just never it never ends well it really doesn't like i remember having a friend of who had dated their boyfriend for like five years and their boyfriend got a job at the restaurant with them and immediately like within that summer like they were split up i was like whoa this is insane anyways yeah don't don't shit where you eat don't shit where you sleep whatever it is you know what i'm talking about stoner girl skincare i am literally wearing two pimple patches right now so let me give you some some tips a when i was in arizona i was writing wave runners and i grew up on wave runners so i know like it's about going fucking hard like you want to get thrown off those bitches like

that's the fun part so anyways i was on like 50 miles an hour hit a wave got thrown the fuck off and like three of my nails popped off so the for the first time in a year i haven't had acrylic nails and as a chronic skin picker it is awful i swear to god having acrylic nails helps me not have acne listen if you pick at your skin you have to kind of put a barrier in between that either you're mentally stable enough to be like no girl don't pick at your skin you listen to yourself and you walk away from the mirror i don't have that self-control so like i have to do something else and for me it's either well putting a pinball patch on which we'll get to that love that but also the acrylic nails having acrylic nails that were like semi-long and like a weird

shape such as like an almond or a coffin shape i don't know the shapes oh god i couldn't get the right angle on my acne so i would like try and get it and it was impossible to get and i'm also realizing acrylic nails are not as sharp as your regular nails you'd be surprised how strong your regular nails are so when you like press at your skin with your regular nails you're gonna cut yourself you're going to it's just gonna it's a hot mess and i have two little acne spots right now actually multiple little acne spots right now that are simply from me having short nails and being able to feel you know every single little tiny bump it constantly touching my face and then also picking at them so i love acrylic nails honestly incredible for deterring you from

picking at your skin but also uh pimple patches star face i love star face i was out of their pimple patches for a couple months and i didn't realize how much they actually helped me and how much i love using them within my daily life if i have just like a tiny little pimple like on my face that i know is gonna bother me all day and i'm gonna constantly think about immediately boop pimple patch it's cute it's a star shape they got spongebob ones they got fucking everything they had like hello kitty love it all put a pimple patch on it so you can't see it out of sight out of mind you know what i mean they also make if you're a body acne girly like me i can't help it's my hormones okay i literally have been on accutane like i should not have any acne but

my hormones are raging inside me anyways they make big like body pimple patches for like big breakouts which i also love and they're so cute they're shaped like uh fruit stickers anyways those number two or those are my first two whoa the weed's hitting okay okay number three which is kind of more in the area of like stoner skincare if you are smoking paper such as a blunt such as paper as like a cone a joint whatever it may be make sure you're outside and make sure there is a source that is blowing it away from your face because when you have that smoke sitting so closely to your face it's gonna make you break out i had the worst skin when i was only smoking blunts like in college that's all i smoked there

was one point in time where we were celebrating i think we're celebrating 420 and i rolled like seven eight blunts for us and we smoked all of them inside a car with closed windows the oh my god the breakout i had after that was something i've never experienced and it's because all that smoke was just sitting on my skin and clogging it like when you smoke a pipe at least it's kind of distanced away from you and it's a singular hit and then you move it away from your face and then you blow it away from your face same as a like a bong rip or like smoking a dab all of that smoke is essentially moving away from your face but when it comes to papers or specifically blunts and i think specifically blunts because the um nicotine in it that's

gonna make you break out like crazy avoid avoid or keep for special occasions you know what i mean i mean i love a good joint but yeah the blunts specifically because of the nicotine because i also used to vape i vaped for like four years actually smoked cigarettes for like two because i got into the service industry and then i started vaping like for three years after that and then i quit um yeah that also made my skin really fucking bad like huge cystic acne multiple of them daily like it was really bad if you have acne avoid nicotine avoid all nicotine avoid blunts if you can try and keep the smoke away from your face and always after you smoke wash your hands okay you don't want like ash on your hands you don't want your hands smelling like weed or being sticky

and then happening happening to like touch your face so wash your hands that's really all the advice i could give because that's what i'm going through right now pimple patches love me some acrylic nails and get that smoke away from your face and avoid nicotine my god please you're all addicted free yourselves hi hannah with an h first time caller long time listener that's me um first of all i just want to say i've been loving your summer content recently recently in your travels um thank you for sharing that with us and um i just love your aesthetic and I love um the sun um it coming out has been life-changing and uh this summer I've been uh taking some dabs and um I was just wondering what your thoughts were on this subject um I'm a new

I'm new to the rig new to the dab situation um and I am enjoying it but something about a blow torch in my hand feels like a little bit drug addict energy um so yeah trying to keep myself in check but anyways love you love to all of you not the drug addict energy I giggled they make cute little pink rhinestone ones maybe that will offset the drug addict energy I literally use one of the big like camping blow torches the first few times I was like yeah I'm scared but once you get into it and you realize it's not scary and also like I mean I don't know I don't know I feel like dabbing can be better for you than smoking flour I feel like dabbing is a little less harsh on my lungs because you can take smaller dabs and you won't have to take as many bowls does that

make sense like i feel like i would have to smoke three bowls which is a lot of smoke for my lungs to inhale to feel the same way that a small dab would make me feel you know what i'm saying so i think although scary because blowtorch scary i think it is inherently probably better for your lungs but you have to be very careful about the heat number one thing i'm going to tell my girlies when it comes to smoking out of a rig of any sort a change the water bong or rig change the fucking water every time you do it preferably um and b don't get that shit too hot if you're doing a hot dab such as you're heating up the banger and then putting the wax in give it a good 30 to 45 seconds to cool off i don't even do hot dabs anymore i only do like a cold start so i will

put the wax in the banger and then i will heat up the banger with the wax in it on the torch for like five ten seconds until it starts melting and then i'll hit it and i feel like that has such a smoother hit such an easier hit um not as hot you're not gonna burn yourself um but that is my go-to way of smoking dabs love a dab i save dabs for the evening um just because if i take a dab i might be knocked out for the rest of the day like i'm just gonna have to be horizontal for a few hours i'm not gonna lie um but i usually do a dab before dinner and then i pass out and that's my night routine help how to find independence and break the cycle of codependency in a relationship spend time alone spend time alone be alone a lot of people and i have

recognized this quality in myself but a lot of people jump from relationship to relationship to relationship because they know when they're in a relationship they don't technically have to be alone because they're going to be spending time with the other person even with they when they are alone they know that they can rely on the other person to spend time with which is fantastic and amazing if you use it in a healthy way if you use it in an unhealthy way then it's just kind of like okay we're avoiding ourselves by getting lost in other people and that is kind of the whole basis of like what codependency is not being able to survive as an individual needing the other person whether it's reassurance time money energy whatever it may be to rely on so spend time alone

like in a relationship i value my alone time in my relationship so much because that is how i truly you know connect with myself and learn more about myself and understand myself myself a little bit more um and i can't do that when i am with my partner because that is when i'm spending time focusing on who i am as a partner and who i am to that person and who i am to myself and all those fun complexities that come with relationships that you should spend time trying to figure out but it should not be the only thing that you're focusing on girl you gotta spend time alone i challenge you i dare you to literally be like hey love you but i think i want some alone time tonight and either a i will see you the next day we could have like um breakfast lunch in the

morning whatever i'll see you in a few days i'm gonna spend this friday night alone and do all my favorite things and spend some time with myself because i feel like i need that and it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me so chill or like maybe you live together and you could be like hey i want you to go do something with friends tonight or i would like to have the house to myself tonight just so i can spend some time with myself and have a little self-care night and like your partner should hear these things and respect them be like hell yeah dude like enjoy i would love to help by giving you some space or getting out of the house for a little bit like that's how they should respond um so yeah literally just spend time alone and

don't be afraid to it's very healthy and very important within a relationship i found a lot of my alone time simply comes from having opposite schedules than my boyfriend like the service industry i'm always working nights and weekends um and he works a monday through friday nine to five so it's like all day i have alone time which is really nice so in the evenings when we do come back to each other um i feel like it's not impeding on my alone time um so yeah you can find a schedule that works for you but sometimes you just gotta be like hey tonight tonight is all about me and me only i dare you someone said it's breakup season i've been noticing that i've been noticing a lot of people it's one or two ways people either

deeply in love because this summer has helped them get a little bit hotter and more passionate and deeply connected with the world around them as well as their partner or it's working in the opposite we're becoming so deeply connected to ourselves and the world around us that we're realizing you know what fuck him you know what i mean and listen i get it like we are just getting into leo season we're all really thinking about ourselves how we make ourselves successful how we grow as individuals how we kind of um where we're gonna go from here especially being like mid summer about to start into the school year where people are kind of thinking about new beginnings in a sense i feel like fall is a perfect time for new beginnings um we have spent so much time this

summer being hot and fiery and passionate that now we've had time to really sit back look around and ask ourselves like is this really what we want tempers are a little shorter um we have less time for bullshit so yeah i think people going through breakups right now kind of it makes a lot of sense and honestly I think it's the perfect time to like if you are a person who's like avoidant I don't know what to do do I should I do I break up with him do I stay with him asking yourself that over and over literally redditing it oh my god that's when you know you have a problem girl just do it like take it from me like now is the perfect time you still have a good month or so left of summer to go out be crazy have a good time then maybe you're you're gonna start into

school and it's gonna feel like a new beginning because you have new classes and new people in these classes and it's a perfect time to be single because now you're gonna explore that within the school setting or like you're entering fall and fall is a amazing time to just like be inside be with yourselves get cozy get comfy really focus on who you want to be kind of next summer after graduating through this summer and trying to survive the winter which will be upon us shortly but I'm very excited for the fall activities yeah no it really is breakup season I think everybody's like either over it or into it and there's really no in between oh someone said how to get comfortable in therapy slash actually open up and be honest with your therapist so funny literally saturday

oh it was so slow it was so slow at work and the thing is with serving like if it's slow they'll cut you and you get to go home like you don't have to stick around that long but bartending like i'm clocked in girly like i'm there start to finish there's no changing of shifts like you girls there for eight hours how dare i complain about working eight hours i am so spoiled but like in the service industry I feel like the shifts are pretty quick or you get like at least a couple hour breaks between your doubles um but anyways I it was so slow and then we got a little busy at night and then we were about to like fucking close and three people walk in and they sit down at my bar and I was like fuck oh my god like our kitchen closes in three minutes and you're sitting

down I know you're gonna sit here for like an hour but I look up it's my old therapist and like her daughter and her daughter's daughter I was like what oh my god and she's like the sweetest kindest older woman and I don't think she recognized me because I haven't been with her in a while it's been a while since I've been I've seen her I need to get back but I recognized her because she changed my life in so many different ways um and i was like oh what have you guys been up to and they're like we just saw the barbie movie and she seemed like she was excited about it and then her daughter was like yeah it was weird i was like oh shit okay what do you want to eat we're literally closing like let's hurry this up anyways one thing about the barbie movie

if you think it's weird it's because you can't seek inwardly that deeply and you're gonna find it a little bit uncomfortable me and my therapist we got it i'm sure she shed a little tear anyways when i saw her i felt like i also had a hard time being vulnerable or being honest like especially being around my parents who are kind of perfectionists i felt like i always needed to put on a front of like no everything's going good and i'm spelling through the pain and it is what it is like haha oh my god everything's great let's focus on the positive when in reality like being at your therapist is the time where you're allowed to deep dive into those negative emotions like that is the safe space to do so a you have to like your therapist like finding a therapist is

like kind of finding a good best friend because you need to be willing to open up and if you don't feel full comfortability which like of course over time is going to have to build you're gonna have to gain trust you're gonna have to spend more time with them but if the basics of like do i like this person no then find a new therapist you know you have to somewhat vibe you have to be like no i think she'll understand what i'm saying here she's responding well she's helping me through how i need i'm just the one being a little closed off that's the kind of relationship you need to start off with and then my friend who just started therapy and is loving it she's like my therapist is so cute she's amazing but i feel like i'm having a hard time being vulnerable with

her she was like i'm gonna go to she's a nurse so her shifts are fucking crazy they're like 12 hours long she's like i'm doing uh two shifts back to back and then i have a therapy session directly after my second shift and she was like i think i will be so brain dead and irritated and angry and upset that i will be able to be just like so vulnerable and open and honest about how the fuck i'm actually feeling and it's going to be perfect because i will not have any energy to even have any walls up or to you know try and put on a front i'm just going to be irritated and ready to fucking complain and that's exactly what she wants like that's exactly the attitude she wants your therapist wants you to be raw and vulnerable and open with your emotions the same way you would

be kind of with a best friend um so i recommend you know you don't have to have like the most perfect day before your therapist appointment sometimes having a awful horrible day is the perfect kind of day to have before going to your therapist because it'll kind of break down those walls um so don't be afraid to have bad experiences don't be afraid to open yourself up they can't help you if you aren't helping yourself by being real and raw and vulnerable so try it i dare you oh wow i have a lot of requests for back to school a lot of them and many different topics i'm thinking maybe we break it up into a few different like subsections in between questions but back to school my god i haven't thought about back to school in a while

but when i was going back to school i was definitely like caught between two different feelings of like oh fuck here we go again and also like that childlike joy and excitement of well what is the school you're gonna bring you know new things new ideas new people new experiences exciting right like it's okay give into that excitingness oh my god there's no better feeling of like your first back to school fits ah and getting like a new backpack or like a new tote bag and getting like new um journal what are they called oh my god wow it has been a hot minute new like notebooks and pens and pencils that is the best feeling oh my god it's literally you're focusing on that one day because you know it's going to be the start to

something new the start to something exciting start to learning more things and challenges and growth and oh my god and tap into that exciting energy you know it's scary because you like you know what's coming but i think the joy that comes from it is will overshadow the scaries because the unknown is more interesting to your mind than the known like yeah it's school it's going to be challenging it's going to be a little hard you're going to have your stressors you're going to have those nights where you're like what the fuck am i doing you know you're gonna have those moments but by overcoming them and working through them ultimately it'll make you a better person it'll make you more adept in the real world it'll make you more willing to work through

challenges and get through them successfully like life is not going to be easy so of course school is not going to be easy like school is going to challenge you inherently because they're trying to get you to learn something go learn school's so important okay being there being present is simply the most important thing you can do just open your ears soak up as much knowledge as you can because now I'm out of school and I kind of miss it shocking right like I miss going to school and being like having that routine and having my friends around me and having teachers who are willing to help me after class or let me chill in the art room longer than I was supposed to or having an abundance of art supplies to use and find and teachers who want to help me

or learning new things and constantly having knowledge presented to me whether I wanted the knowledge presented to me or not there was so much that I learned that I took for granted and if I could go back and redo it I really would and you're like bitch you're fucking crazy but like I believe school is so important to just becoming an overall well-rounded better human being able to face challenges able to succeed in the real world able to work through problems able to make connections make friends problem solve it's fantastic all around I would be lying to you if I said it's not supposed to be hard it is supposed to be hard that's why you've tests that's why you've quizzes why you have projects to do but by getting through them and simply

getting through them sometimes that's the best you can do and that's all you got to do like bitch as long as you're turning in your papers good on you my parents were like a kind of parents like you better be coming home with a's or we have an issue but like sometimes I just simply can't get those a's like in math girl my brain can't do it I don't know I'm sorry like no amount of practice is gonna make me able to learn fractions I just can't I can't make the connections but i can in in art and in my english class and in a science class so like one c is okay it's not gonna fucking kill you don't base your worth on your grades base your worth on the work that you're putting in like i put in hella work on math but there was no way i was gonna be able to

get anything above a b like a b was my a in math so don't worry about grades okay do your best show up turn your shit in put yourself out there open your ears that's literally all you have to fucking do and you will get through it and you will be a better person for it but yeah school's so exciting i think you should all be excited for it um treat yourself to a little new little notebook treat yourself to some new cute pens a new cute tote bag a nice first day of school outfit your new pair of shoes for the school year that was always mine um and yeah lean into the excitement of it all newness can be very exciting practical tools someone said dorm room essentials oh girl snacks a comfy blanket some cute stuffed animals shower shoes um a shower caddy

lots of ramen a planner girl it's a school year get a fucking planner okay you need one you're gonna use it i promise you get a get an academic planner write your shit down cross it out it is so satisfying you'll love it make daily to-do lists as soon as you wake up a keurig would be amazing for a dorm room any sort of coffee situation um what else frozen pizzas love it a mini fridge was ideal for my dorm room really needed that um and yeah that's about it hey babe um hope you're doing good just wanted to come on here and ask for some advice so basically this um summer for me has been so rough I've been back from school staying with my family trying to embrace time with them because I don't think I'll be coming back next summer

um I live or like I go to college like across the country from my family but anyway so I broke up with my boyfriend like two months ago or a month ago and I have been really anxious I literally fainted I've been having panic attacks which I've never had in my life and I just want to be alone you know and I feel like I'm in kind of like my healing phase right now um but I planned a vacation with my family and my friend is coming along too um for two weeks and I don't know how the hell to approach that when I feel like this girl I hear you I do because I live in the constant state of like I want to go out and have fun and live my best life and be surrounded by a million people and get crazy with it and then I'm also like such a homebody I want to be alone I need

to be alone I want to go sit in a field alone and cry and then like walk home like that kind of emo energy and you have to find a balance between the two I'm not saying don't go on vacation I'm not saying don't lean into having your friends there I'm not saying don't get excited do do get excited about all those things but also honor time for yourself so before this trip and before you go back to school understand you probably have a little bit more alone time being back at home where you're familiar with your parents with your family than you will at school where you have friends constantly around you and new social things going on and have homework so I think this is the perfect time to really honor that you know your comfortable spots you know you know

what is around you you know um what to be familiar with like when I would go back home I'd be like cool i can go on drives at night down the back roads next to cornfields smoke a little bowl listen to music i can walk to the local neighborhood park and sit next to the lake with my headphones and listening to lord i can go wander on the woods i could take a walk in my neighborhood simple things but i knew that they were always there for me and i knew they always offered me alone time take advantage of those you know where those exist because you're in a familiar place so escape a little bit and also get excited you are in a new era school's about to start you're gonna go back to school you're gonna have a fucking blast back at college with

your friends taking new classes getting challenged in new ways having new social events to go to new parties having a little bit more freedom that will be coming soon because you'll be out of your parents house again you have a family vacation coming up that you're going on with a friend so if you need to escape from your family you and your friend can go off and do fun things and hang out somewhere else that your family isn't you can run off and have fun little adventures together make new memories during the summer before you go back to school have one last relaxing vacation before you go back to school there's a lot to be looking forward to here I feel like maybe you feel like you can't balance it all but I really think you can I think there

is space for all the feelings that you are feeling right now to coexist to a need some alone time and to go off and find those things in familiar places in your hometown to be get excited about this uh family vacation that you have planned coming up putting in hard work and getting to experience it and also having a friend to come along so if you do need to escape from your family you and your friend can run off and make new memories together and have alone time in that sort of way and then after that you're single you're going back to college you're gonna have so much fucking free time um because you're gonna be away from your parents you're gonna be living on your own schedule you're going to be learning new things meeting new people growing as an

individual throughout that school year so honor this little time that you do have left this summer honor the nostalgic alone time that you have left with yourself um and lean into that but you have a lot of big things coming and a lot to look forward to and i think they're going to go way better than you ever could have imagined also speaking of the barbie movie someone said first gyno appointment story time i'm hella nervous oh here's the thing i've been to two different gynecologists the first one i didn't have insurance so i went to plan oh not plan b what's it called oh wow what's it called oh my god planned parenthood wow your girl's brain we're inside today that's for sure anyways I went to Planned Parenthood and she was so sweet and so

cute and tried to make me feel as comfortable as I could and it was just a general checkup pre-IUD now when I got my first IUD it was back in the days where IUDs were new so they didn't know how to pop these bitches in like you're just taking an Advil okay they took a little bit longer and that's why I had a bad first experience with the IUD nowadays like ask your doctor how many IUDs they've placed if they're like girl I do one every hour you're good to go it's gonna be like getting a tire changed on the raceway track like that bitch is gonna be done in 10 seconds so don't be too afraid now my second gynecologist appointment which I feel like was the most important one um i picked a doctor who had amazing reviews research your doctors okay look them up

there are many uh reviews on them i'm the kind of person who just can't see a man so i'm not just gonna call up the hospital that takes my insurance and be like assign me anybody no i'm gonna look into it especially if i have a little bit of nerves about my experience so i did some research she seemed amazing i went in she was so comforting she really made sure i was heard about my previous experience with my iud because i was doing an iud consultation um and then that day i had a general uh checkup which the speculum really should not hurt i feel like i felt nothing um um i also have only ever been to the gynecologist after having sex and i feel like that makes a huge difference um if you have no sexual experience and you're not used to anything being around or

down there it can be a little bit of a scary experience um but if you are used to that having a doctor down there is no problem because men have been down there that are dumber than a rock so like having someone actually thinking down there love it fantastic like they're gonna make sure you're comfortable um anyways she was fantastic she asked me before doing anything or told me what was happening before doing anything general just check up and then i had a pap smear which i feel like a lot of girlies are terrified of the pap smear because i was told they go up there and they scrape off cells to test and make sure you don't have anything some weird suspicious cell growth no they literally took you know those like barbecue sauce smears that are like rubber

brushes and they're like bendy and they have a bunch of little like fingers on them and you use them to spread barbecue sauce on things that is literally what they used on my cervix but like mini like itty bitty teeny tiny size it felt like i was getting tickled like it felt weird because nothing had touched me up there like that is deep inside me very weird pointed area but it didn't hurt it felt like a little tickle and then it was over and then i was sitting up it was fantastic it was amazing research your doctor don't be afraid if you don't want to do something you can say no like she was like do you want your pap smear today and i was like sure and she was like no I need a verbal yes or no and that taught me a lot about being you know not letting other

people control your body and really being in charge of your body and taking charge of it so take charge of it if you're too uncomfortable for that today say hey I'm good thank you so much maybe next time she asked if I wanted like a breast exam I was like I feel like I'm good because she was like you really don't have to start getting those until like 25 or older so I was like yeah no thank you I'm okay today and that really just taught me a lot about being you're in charge of your body you are not at the whims of your doctor or your partner or your friend or whoever it might be you're in charge of your body you can say yes you can say no if you're uncomfortable in a situation stand up for yourself but the gynecologist is nothing to

be feared mine was fantastic she did an amazing job i also feel like just going to a woman in general they understand those fears and they understand those concerns and they're more willing to hear you out and you know make that experience more comfortable for you but do your research on your doctors a hundred percent someone said let's talk about hot bummer summer real i just did a little write-up on patreon about um let me pull it up but it's about seasonal depression and like a little guide to working through it and embracing this season and embracing where you are within it I feel like I had a really hard time last year because um I was going through my year of restroom relaxation aka I was just inside with myself all the time learning about myself but not

really venturing out into the real world more so exploring myself within the confines of the comfort of my home and although that was fantastic and had a lot of growth behind it I also felt very disconnected and I was looking at my phone and seeing all these people on the trip to the Amalfi Coast and sipping their Aperol Spritz and I was like wow I'm a loser and now I'm sad and that is not the feelings I should have been feeling whatsoever get off your phone get connected with yourself and find inspiration and things on your phone that are positive okay but here's a little rundown of some some things that I said to help with uh your seasonal depression one is feel your emotions I feel like a lot of what I was running from I kept running from and then it

just built up and built up and built up and then it was like this huge overwhelming thing when in reality it could have been this small little thing that I just handle as soon as I feel it and move through it so don't be afraid to feel your emotions bad emotions can be just as quote unquote positive as good emotions because you're probably going to learn more through them than you are the positive ones the good ones are easy to understand to process to move on from but the hard ones the bad ones it's going to be a challenge and in turn you're going to learn more about yourself so don't be afraid of your emotions feel them fully and then remember to move on from them afterwards to get outside okay i wish like i spent so much time inside but i wish i would have just

taking a stroll down the fucking street to go to the park and sit there for like 30 minutes in the sunlight to sit on my front porch even like anything you don't have to be doing these big immaculate crazy things sometimes you can literally just walk down your street and look at the trees like that is all you simply have to do but there is a magic within sunlight and heat um that i think we all have felt this summer and every summer we know there's a special magic that comes from sunlight and it is so regenerative and refreshing so get out into it sit in the sun enjoy it okay you deserve it stop pulling yourself inside you don't have to be getting on a plane to deserve to have fun or to be outside experiencing the life around you all right

number three is small things can be big things i wrote i feel like i've spent a majority of my life waiting for big things to come or basing my life off the big things i've always felt like i wasn't enough because i wasn't going on big trips or doing big things or looking a certain way or behaving a certain way it has been a huge downfall of mine what are you waiting for life is here with you at every moment looking towards the small things when it will inherently give your life more meaning purpose and drive if you have a hard time looking to these things start with a gratitude list three to five things every day big or small non-negotiable train your brain it wants to look towards the positive you don't have to wait around for these big things to find you you need to start

looking for the little things that's the way to live life literally sometimes the most important things within my daily life are like my cup of coffee and my 20 minutes of alone time in the morning getting outside on my balcony and spending 10 minutes in the sunshine reading a book a hot shower at the end of the day and washing my face can be so fucking refreshing but it really is like the little things train your brain they are the most important and last but not least I feel like plants have really really helped me throughout this summer not only like being surrounded by greenery even when i'm inside but also learning to take care of another living thing really teaches you how to take care of yourself every time i go to water my plants i'm reminded like oh my god i

need to clip my fucking fingernails or oh my god i need to go do a face mask or oh my god i need to go do the dishes or oh my god it reminds me of like another care task that i need to do and it shows me that hey sometimes watering your plants and watering yourself can be so fucking simple and the payoff that comes from it such as a new leaf or some new growth is so worth it sometimes you just need that physical reminder of the things that you're supposed to do and here's the thing plants are way easier than pets get yourself a pothos those bitches never die and they physically tell you when they need water they'll start drooping a little bit throw some water in there and they're good to go pothos are my number one plants and not only are they helping me in the

summertime where i feel like i'm surrounded by greenery no matter where i go but especially in the winter uh when there is no greenery left and you're feeling a little barren such as the world around us look we have a beautiful payoff from this summer's plants from planting them digging our hands in some soil and now we have some beautiful plants to look at and care for during the winter as well so those are kind of my number one tips for enjoying the summer look towards the little things eat a fucking popsicle with your friends on a sidewalk walk down the road at night look at the fucking trees around you sit in the sunlight enjoy and don't be afraid to enjoy okay um hi everyone i'm gonna try and actually send this one because my phone's about to die

and i didn't send it last time but my question was is how do you become more comfortable and in tune with yourself and with your body and expressing yourself overall and doing the things you want to do I feel like I struggle a lot with expressing myself I feel like especially with my clothing I feel like I play it safe and I want to do more like I want to have fun but it's also hard when I feel like you don't fit the standard and that's why I asked how do I feel like that's why I was asking like how do you become more comfortable within your body because I feel like it seems as if everyone has it figured out and I feel like I'm the only one who doesn't um especially because of the people i'm surrounded by they just seem so comfortable

and in tune with themselves and i don't feel that way um but yeah i love you hannah okay number one nobody has it figured out even if you think they have it figured out we're all just kind of fronting in a sense of we're all still trying to figure it out like even when i'm gonna be like fucking 80 i will still be learning new things about myself and how i want to express myself and who i want to be that will never end because as humans we are constantly growing shifting evolving whatever it may be okay you're constantly learning new things about yourself and it's constantly going to be a challenge it's going to be a challenge okay unfortunately i don't know why being yourself is kind of like the harder thing to do

i think it's because society's set up for us in such a way where it's like i can look and understand how i should act behave look feel etc but it's so hard to fit myself into those boxes because i am simply not those things and being those things feels uncomfortable but also being myself kind of feels uncomfortable either way it's going to be a challenge but being yourself you will find more comfort in more confidence in more compassion towards yourself in but learning those things and you know wearing that outfit or behaving that way or trying that class or doing that new thing it's gonna be hard no one ever said it's gonna come easy it's gonna be a challenge, but it's like a fun challenge. Do you know what I mean? Like it's like a fun little

social experiment, you know? Don't look at other people as a way to guide yourself. Look inward. Look at who do you want to be? What do you want to wear? Who do you want to become? Ask yourself, what does me in five years look like? What is she wearing? Where does she live? what is she doing and don't base that off of anybody else around you base it off of your true desires your true wants your true feelings and then go after it it is going to be a challenge um but that challenge shouldn't deter you the same way school is a challenge it's going to help you learn more about yourself become more confident in yourself and it'll make those challenges further down the line easier for you to evolve through when it would take me like eight

hours to finally get the confidence to put on this outfit and leave the house and the whole time I was out of the house I felt uncomfortable because it's a new outfit and I wasn't sure how are other people feeling like that's how I started but now I can wear the craziest fucking shit and walk out of this house and not think a second thought about it okay and that's because I've taken the time to challenge myself to try new things to understand some things work and some things don't and to move on from the things that don't work and move towards the things that do make me feel comfortable and do uplift and support me in that funny sort of way but you got this listen to your gut don't rely on other people or what society tells you to be and challenge yourself to try

new things to lean into that person you want to be in five years to become that person now how do I take the first step in my daily life to become that person that I want to be in five years and go after it no one's going to stop you other than yourself so stop hindering yourself you got this you're amazing you're wonderful everybody would be lucky to know you and lucky to spend time with you and lucky to be in your presence remember that someone said i'm scared of moving away from all my friends but i'm moving to college soon here's the thing all of my like older friends that i've had in my life or like the longest friends that i've had have are not living where i live like they live minimum three four hours away from me maybe even nine or ten like it is

there there's a distance there but that doesn't mean we're not close literally on facetime the other day like yesterday my friend called me she's like girl i need to smoke but i broke my bong what the fuck do i do i spent three hours on facetime with her so we could build a gb together and I could watch her take a hit like those are the activities that we would be doing on college but like now we just do it over FaceTime and there's weeks where we won't talk or sometimes months even and I think the best key to maintaining long-term friendships is to really take nothing personally we are all so involved within our own life that we get caught up in it and not only are you going to get caught up in your own life and kind of disregard some things around you that you

should regard but your friends are going to do the same and you need to offer them the same forgiveness that you want to be offered let people grow on their own timeline let people develop on their own timeline celebrate each other um don't forget about the big things such as birthdays and you know maybe they have an important interview coming up or they have an important test and you text them a little good luck whatever it may be going on trips to new cities is also so much more fun when you have a friend living there so take advantage of that but i think distance does honestly make the heart grow fonder and we all have to grow on our own paths but that doesn't mean just because you're moving or they're moving that doesn't mean you guys have to stop becoming

friends all of a sudden keep up the contact don't take things too personally allow them to grow at their own pace allow forgiveness um and yeah your friendship will probably be just as strong as when it was when you're when you guys were together like every day i promise someone asked what is your take on cringe culture being cringe etc i literally had a podcast titled um to be cringe and chaotic is to be free i think it's like from a year ago honestly and y'all are just catching up with what i've been putting down for a year now free yourself free yourself from the constraints of having to perform or having to be a certain person in public or having to behave a certain way free yourself be yourself to be cringe and chaotic is to be free okay

it's to be truly you it's to be connected to yourself fully and uninhibited in a special kind of way allow yourself to be cringe also i feel like once i kind of allowed myself to be cringe I made better connections I brought better people into my life because I was truly being me and I wasn't afraid to be me and when I was being me and people weren't accepting of that I was like oh they're lame they don't get it moving on not taking it personally like they just they don't get it and that's okay we can't connect on that way they're lost moving on and then there's people who will see you and laugh with you and open themselves to you and want to have you who you are truly in their life and I feel like by submissing yourself or holding yourself back or

you know shutting yourself down in a way will never bring you those deep level connections that you truly want you got to be a little weird and wild and a little freaky with it and the world will reciprocate and give you back that pure energy that you're putting out people will side eye you people won't get it people will make fun of you blah blah blah they're gonna do that for literally anything you fucking do so you might as well just not wear a mask and be yourself you gotta take it on the chin if people have a problem with you or the way that you act or the way that you express yourself it's because they have a problem with them and also you guys are just not on the same vibe wavelength and that's okay that doesn't mean you have to force yourself

to their wavelength or force their wavelength to yours it just means you got to find the right match the right people who get it and they will come to you but to be cringe and chaotic is to truly be free so lean into that hey girly hope you're doing well lots of love we never know how to start these things um so basically he we're mentioning festival outfits for your rave last week on the pod i was wondering if you could give us some more festival outfit ideas specifically more for like i don't know not a rave i'm gonna be seeing lana at this festival for example so i'm like am i gonna be having my red dress on tonight I don't know I'm really trying to figure out what to wear to this festival and I could totally use

your help also my other question is how do you tap into your like feminine energy I find my Capricorn self getting trapped in the masculine energy a little too frequently so I love you so much and yeah I hope hope to hear back from you bye so when I dress myself for any sort of occasion i ask myself what's the vibe how am i feeling how do i want to feel so like for my rave outfit i wanted to feel like a slutty baddie with my titties out covered in glitter so that's what i went after if i'm going to the grocery store and i'm hungover i'm going for comfy casual no one fucking look at me so i have sunglasses on i have slides on and i have an oversized t-shirt with a funny saying on it if i'm going to lana del rey like yeah maybe i do want my red dress

on tonight like maybe i want to embody that vibe so i'm wearing like a cute little 50s red dress or like um you know a fun flirty white top or my red heart sunglasses with my red lip like it's fun to dress up for the occasion all the taylor swift girlies are dressing in like all sparkles or like outfits are of hers or gold or red or purple or whatever it may be with the with the wristbands oh my god with the oh my god the candy the taylor swift girls and their candy their bracelets it's so cute ask yourself what's the vibe and then match it when i find myself not dressing for the vibe I find myself very uncomfortable like if I'm hungover and I need to go to the grocery store I'm not putting on a mini dress and heels because I'm gonna feel

fucking terrible and if I want to go all out one day and I want to look cute in a little mini skirt and a crop top I'm not gonna force myself into that oversized t-shirt and dull myself down i'm gonna raise myself up and wear what the fuck i want to wear but it really is all about matching the vibe what do i want to feel how do i want to feel what is the energy that i want to embody a lot of the times when it comes to big events or even just like putting together outfits or photo shoots or whatever it may be i love creating a mood board i love a pinterest board i love you know doing collaging on my bazaar app oh my god love it dress for the mood dress for the occasion and don't don't dress for anybody but yourself someone said best way to get faded for

a concert eat a gummy eat a gummy eat a cookie whatever it may be that's the best way literally in the car i'll eat it you got like 30 minutes to get through security and all that you have nothing on you so you don't need to be scared and then by the time you like get through security find your seats get a little hot dog a little drink whatever it may be that is that's perfect i'm thinking arena right now i don't know why i'm visualizing taylor swift uh yeah i would definitely be popping a gummy before taylor swift if you're at like a small local venue girl you could just like bring a joint for before and after that's usually what i do they're not checking bags that hard they're gonna open them look inside there and close it they're not gonna

shove their hand in your purse and dig around scary so like you can throw a couple joints at the bottom of your bag i also live in a legal state so it's like everybody has that shit on them anyways if i was going to a big concert it would be a gummy if i was going to like a small local show it would be a joint before and after that's the way to do it tips on making my social battery lasts longer you have to have ample alone time if like equal if not more alone time to offset the social battery time for me personally like i can do four hours of like family time if i have the whole morning alone you see what i'm talking about i can do a four hour shift if i have the whole morning alone or even an eight hour shift if i have the whole morning and evening alone i need

alone time to offset the time that i gotta be like hi my name is hannah and i'm so very happy to be here like i need time to sit and brood in silence and smoke some weed so yeah i think having time to yourself to offset the time that you're spending with other people and also don't be afraid of the irish goodbye i am such a disappearer like i love a good disappearing act if i'm out with friends even if i'm at my own house if i am with my family i'll just be like okay i'm not feeling it anymore stand up love you all bye and just disappear when i'm at concerts or at parties sometimes i won't even say bye like to my closest friends maybe but my ass will just stand up and walk out the front door and get in my car and leave like i am such an irish disappear irish

goodbye straight up ghosting in real life yeah as soon as my social battery drains don't be afraid to be like yeah we're leaving and that's why i always drive separately to places because i'm a weirdo like that or you just gotta have friends that get it that are like also the same as you and want to disappear and get sonic mozzarella sticks after the event and when you're like i'm over this they're like yep let's go but yeah you have to have alone time and when you're ready to leave girly you just gotta get up and go okay someone said i'm a guy and i just got out of a very toxic relationship any advice any advice for any person getting out of a toxic relationship get out into the real world and get crazy with it for real when i was in my toxic relationship

i had to like relearn like oh my god yeah i can leave the house i can feel good about myself i don't have to constantly check in with somebody about where i am or what i'm doing my anxiety levels are at zero because i'm not constantly fighting with somebody and i had to like relearn how to integrate into the real real world and realize that not everybody's fucking crazy i was just dealing with one insane person so i went out and i got crazy with it i was in the club I was partying it up I was drinking I was having a fun time I was trying new things I was hanging out with new people I was going to new places let your friends kind of take over and show you back into the real world get out have fun I would even go to the club like alone and just like

dance and chit chat and then end up back at home alone and just pass out like sometimes that's the best but relearning how to integrate into the real world and like be yourself and not be like trying to control yourself in a certain way because you're afraid of making someone mad it's a hard thing to relearn but you have to have like real world experience to kind of get back into it sorry i was taking a drink of water this is your sign drink your water i know you're dehydrated and your brain is sad because of it it's literally shrinking as we speak you need to drink water anyways yeah I made a video one time as soon as I got on my toxic relationship and I was like this is what you do real world advice write down 10 things maybe five depending on

how controlling it was but for me I could easily write down 10 things that I was not allowed to do in my relationship and then you go out there and do it and it's like a reverse bucket list it's like a fuck it list you know and it would be like okay i'm gonna go talk to a member of the opposite sex i'm gonna actually put on a mini dress that hugs my body you're a man okay i i'm gonna wear that slutty t-shirt that she wouldn't let me wear i don't know whatever it may be write down a list of the things you weren't allowed to do and then go do them all right that is the best way to really realize holy fuck that person was crazy there are normal people in the real world i can exist within the real world because the real world is good and i'm gonna have a blast doing it

do it fuck it list number one priority right now oh someone said your go-to healthy routines such as workout breakfast drinks etc so i'm the kind of person who i always go with my gut feeling but i love a good routine i'm really trying to get back into a workout routine um especially during the winter a workout routine is so nice it just gives you another fun thing to do inside and you can always do it from your home i am such a yoga mat on the floor youtube video for 15 20 minutes little pilates situation that is the kind of workout routine i love a workout routine for you could also be just like going for a walk in the park it doesn't have to be like a gym bro two hour lifting session a day it could it could not i think it's very dependent on who you are

and for me i like a very low impact chill workout just something to get my body moving and then when it comes to eating I really like to eat intuitively and I like to eat the same kind of meals all week because I can't think about a new meal every fucking day I will usually have like the same breakfast the same lunch and then a new-ish dinner every night and in the evenings I let myself go crazy I just really make whatever I'm craving but in the mornings I like to stick to yogurt or eggs some sort of maybe nuts in the yogurt some granola some fresh fruit fresh fruit with my eggs some toast maybe some bacon whatever it may be for lunch I love a like dumpling and a green beans situation I love a sandwich um what else I love leftovers I love a big salad oh my

god lots of greens lots of veggies lots of fresh veggies lots of fresh fruit and easy little proteins such as chicken or salmon food can be fun and it should be fun um but it doesn't have to be chicken tenders every night you can find fun within having a bunch of varieties of food um but yeah sticking to a routine i think is the best way to kind of enter your healthy lifestyle i love a ginger shot whenever i'm feeling down or sick like with my runny nose i'm about to go hit whole foods and buy a couple ginger shots for the next couple days um water water water water water water okay i cannot say it enough the first step within your health routine health journey is water okay you need to be drinking water i have been drinking too much alcohol i'm really

trying to cut back on that i have like two bottles of soju and six seltzers i need to finish off in my fridge and then i'm really gonna try and stay off the alcohol i gotta have some sort of substance so your girl's still gonna smoke listen but i want to enter like a 75 hard situation soon so if you guys want to follow me on that journey let me know maybe we can do it together um but I really want to challenge myself to a fun health situation um and get myself focused on my body and my routines in a healthy way so if you're interested in that like a 75 hard situation and me doing weekly write-ups and letting you guys know what I'm doing that week let me know would love to share I have a lot of people asking for confessionals and I really want to do a confessionals

episode next week okay so as you're hearing this feel free to start dming me i will put up a separate questionnaire on my instagram at hannah marlene for specific confessionals of course um but i will be doing that next week so start racking your brain give me your summer drama give me the juicy gossip i'm gonna take you to church girlies if you need to get anything off your chest as we enter this new era this fall you know end of summer beginning of the new year new school year you need to start fresh let me know we will get it off our chest together but confessionals next episode follow me on instagram at hannah marlene that is where you will be able to submit and i will actually see them anyways i think that's it for our podcast today girlies

i have had such a blast chit-chatting with you thank you for being here thank you for being you thank you for being open and vulnerable and honest with me i hope i can always give that to you provide that to you i am gonna go deep clean my house make me a fun little taco salad for lunch chug some water smoke some more weed get outside sit in the sunshine if i possibly can um and do some thrifting for some fun books hopefully so love you all if you want to catch up with me you can find me on instagram at hannah marlene i will be sharing all my fun little summer things with you i have some fun posts coming up i'm going to the fair next week i'm so excited i just got a new bikini i want to show off so follow me there if you want to see what i'm doing

on my daily life if not you know where to always find me on the podcast smoke sesh on all your favorite streaming services best believe um but i love you all thank you for being here i hope you are cherishing the rest of the summer that you have tapping into that leo season energy okay we're hot we're fun we're flirty we're here to have a good time and nothing but a good time don't let anybody get in the way of that don't let anybody overshadow you you are here to shine to make the most of your life to live your best life so take advantage of it take control girl the only person who is steering the ship that is life is you you can't sit in the passenger seat and hope someone else is going to show up and take the steering wheel no it's you get in control

get into it have some fun create new opportunities new experiences for yourself you're the only one that's gonna do it i love you have a blast this weekend have a great wet rest of your week and next week i will see you all for our confessionals and much much much more questions many many many more questions either way love you see you next week