Smoke Sesh - back 2 school survival guide

Episode Date: August 20, 2024

Hello hotties and welcome back to the one and only smoke sesh, so excited to be back with you all on this beautiful Tuesday! Today we have jam packed episode as I catch you up on my weekend of rest and relaxation, the super moon and how to harness its effects, plus overall retrograde survival tips. We dive right into all your questions (plus your call ins) chatting about work life balance and how to live outside of a 9-5, identity and how to find it (or how to forget about society), herbal supplements and smoking, you don't have to define your life by your depression, underconsumption and how I participate in my daily life, being an active participant in your life, finally we get into the back to school survival guide, we talk dorms, lectures, studying, partying and overall surviving, school doesn't have to be so scary! lets get through it together, we talk wandering eyes, homework for the week and self adoration, making friends in college and putting yourself out there, single girl safety, growing up doesn't have to be so scary, rejection, breakups and much much much much more! thank you for being here and thank you for being you! if you want to see more from me follow me on instagram @ hannahmarlene and if you want more fun content join the patreon club! patreon.com/smokeseshshawty and we will chat next week! MUAH!

listen everybody needs a fairy godmother you know just somebody to look out for them some people call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sash so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all hello hotties of the world and welcome back to another beautiful fun sexy episode of smoke sesh my name is hannah your host and i'm so excited to be back with you all today um i am recording this on a fun little beautiful little full moon day and best believe we have all definitely been feeling the energy the overwhelming energy that this full moon might bring and although I am

recording this on a Monday the day of the full moon I'm sure and you're listening to this on a Tuesday I'm sure you're feeling you know the repercussions the residual energy and let's get into that okay let's go ahead and just dive right into the to the astrology of it all also I probably sound like I have a renewed sense of joy and hope and that's because I didn't work all weekend a love it i love working for a turkish man because he will literally be like i don't wanna no and i'm like oh perfect okay so we're closed all weekend fantastic love to hear it will not be showing up um so that was fantastic also my work had a work party yesterday which i thought about going to here's the thing i love the restaurant industry i cannot do cocaine at

three o'clock in the afternoon unfortunately i am not in that space in my life anymore 18 year old hannah 19 year old hannah 20 year old hannah would have loved this place she would have loved this place she would have been drunk every day on a slew of different substances having a great time as i'm sure they all are but older hannah now is like oh i cannot become that gremlin again so I politely opted out of the work party just for mental health reasons and I stayed home and I really got my shit together cleaned my house and then went to dinner with my parents which was honestly a better way to celebrate a more adult way to celebrate but I feel like that's kind of the themes that this full moon is really bringing up it was a full moon in Aquarius and

not only a full moon in Aquarius but it's also a super sturgeon blue moon and the term once in a blue blue moon really exists for a reason we have not seen a super blue moon in Aquarius since 2014 so think back to 2014 I think it was like August of 2014 think back to that time in your life and what was going on and the themes that were happening maybe the things you were struggling with the things that you are dreaming towards that's kind of what this full moon is making us reevaluate and honestly kind of heal and rebrow oh my god re bring back into our life um so that has been very fun things because i feel like at that point in time i was also having this transitionary phase of like a middle school to high school and that was a really hard change

for me because I felt the pressure of adulthood and now that I'm actually an adult and I'm 25 and I'm mid-20s and everything is kind of in front of me open I just have to simply choose I'm refacing those themes again but with much more freedom which honestly is a lot more healing because it's showing us that we do have the option to choose what we desire to do what fulfills us what avenues we want to follow in who we want to become what are our hobbies looking like what is going on I feel like that's the theme for this full moon and although there has been a lot of fear mongering online as there always is with any sort of full moon new moon retrograde whatever you have it there's always going to be the people online who are like you should be so scared and

that's because simply put like those videos get clicks they get interaction fear is a very easy emotion to draw up in people it's also a very easy emotion to get swept up in that's why donald trump does so well because he literally only runs on fear and fear is such an easy emotion to garner and to keep pushing when in reality fear is only what you make of it like you really are only going to be scared of something if you allow yourself to be scared of it. This is not a scary time, okay? When it comes to a full moon in Aquarius, it's really making us re-evaluate like the collective. Who do we want to become in society? How do we want to give back to society? How do we want to change and better our community? How can you do that as an individual while also

navigating a Leo season where it is very like ego self-identifying? So who are we in society? Who are we going to become in society this might make you kind of re-evaluate career choices maybe friendships small group community circles big group community circles it might make you just re-evaluate who you are becoming in relation to others maybe other people are inspiring you and maybe how can you take on those perspectives and ideals and apply them to your own life but this also means that we're going to be breaking a lot of negative toxic cycles once again me being like no i can't go to the work party because i physically cannot be around that much substances and alcohol at three o'clock on the lord's day i don't believe in god but like

well i shouldn't say that but like hello i have to break those cycles i have to make better choices for myself unfortunately and like sure it's not the fun choice ever but mentally it is the better choice like let's not spiral again babe let's not send ourselves down that path so little things like that also it's like reoccurring themes such as i want to be that person i want to have that identity i want to be the girl who does pilates every day i want to be the girl who wakes up and drinks green tea instead of coffee i want to be the girl who you know goes and achieves that big thing who becomes that doctor that lawyer that social worker that teacher whatever it is those themes right now are very important and you're feeling these urges and these like sudden needs

for change because the universe is pushing us into a better direction onto a better timeline you just need to accept it i talked about mercury retrograde really testing us and i do think there's going to be a lot of reoccurring themes of like the universe making sure we have our shit in order really testing us you know putting out those little feelings and testers and making sure we are making the right choices and i feel like we're also going to go through a lot of those through this um full moon as well maybe old people showing up from the past old habits showing up for the past um wanting to refer back to bad ways of behaving and speaking and thinking and i feel like overall the collective is fed up with that fucking ideal um but also we're kind of exhausted right

now so through the exhaustion through the pain through the you know trials and tribulations that the universe throws our way we do really need to hold space and hold a hope to make sure that we're staying on the right path and to really become that person that we idealize in our everyday life one big thing for me i feel like right now people are talking about this full moon and it's a great time to manifest which I do think can be very helpful but I don't think this is a time to really sit down and script right and get specific like I don't think that kind of manifesting is going to be as potent during this time where it's a lot of thinking and idealizing kind of manifestation the manifestation that really is going to get you further especially

with this retrograde and this aquarius full moon is by doing by action okay so you want to be the girl who does pilates every day bitch book a pilates course book a pilates class go do it by like physically stepping into that person that you want to become and making that big change especially during this time the universe is going to reward you for taking that risk and for kind of like jump-starting um the cycle of where you want to become the universe is going to reward you for seeing what you want and going after it um it's not going to challenge you as much because it sees you know you're putting effort forward if you're stuck someplace and you keep responding to your ex's texts and you keep falling back in these bad behaviors like you're gonna have a

harder time because you're not picking the right path for yourself you're not choosing what is best for yourself you're going through these tests over and over and over again because the universe wants you to learn your lesson bitch learn your lesson so you don't have as hard of a time choose the right path make that decision that hard decision that big first jump to put yourself on the right timeline the universal will reward you i use the pilates example specifically because i literally just did that not pilates i'm going tomorrow but i joined class pass i need to get a code for you guys because i have a feeling i might be using this a lot in my life but i joined class pass because i was like fuck it you know what i want to be that girl who goes to a goes to a little

pilates routine class course whatever the fuck you know once a week twice a week i want to be that girl well bitch you have to show up and do that thing you can't just like visualize it in your head and become it you have to physically live that shit out so i booked a class i will be going tomorrow at 11 30 i'll let you know how it goes i'm very excited um i didn't know class also covered like massages and IV drips what the fuck bitch not that I'm gonna be getting these but I was like sold you know what I mean I can go test different gyms I can go try different things different classes different courses I'm excited that was one big step that I had to take as well as I kind of teased making a career change as well I've been having a lot of realizations and

also looking back at 2014 me and what I was doing and what passions I had and what was driving me and I feel like since 2014 to now I really got lost I was aimlessly wandering I was searching I was going after career paths that other people wanted for me that the collective wanted for me that society wanted for me I was following the wrong fucking things when the right thing was right under my nose like hello bitch you love art you love creating you used to own a tattoo kit you do a lot of ink drawings and things of the of the sort every week i have friends coming up to me that are like can you design a tattoo for me can you create a tattoo for me why the fuck am i not tattooing like hello why are you not doing this you've been wanting to do this you have

done stick and pokes bad bad but like you have dabbled in the area why the fuck did i not see it through and genuinely it's because i thought i was not good enough i thought i wouldn't be good enough i like set myself up for failure by not even believing in myself i just stopped i gave up on what truly was my calling and my passion and i am giving myself a second chance we all deserve second chances especially from ourselves just because you didn't choose the right thing in the past doesn't mean you don't have another option to do it in the present um and i feel like there's a lot of forgiveness in this full moon and a lot of understanding of the you know silent truths in our lives that maybe we always look away from and we don't really grasp onto that well

and I've really been grasping onto that and trying to really bring that into fruition so yeah I have started putting together a little tattoo portfolio and hopefully I can find an apprenticeship here soon because the restaurant industry is killing me i can't do it anymore i can't do it i also like can't work for a company because it makes me want to literally i have an authority issue like it'll be a problem i don't do well in those environments i do very well working on my own i had to really sit down and think to myself like how have i succeeded as an adult and how have i failed and how can i use those things and those experiences and those lessons to put forth into a better avenue for myself it was so nice because i haven't shared my art online in a while

and i finally posted like a cute little illustration um the other day and like immediately in my inbox on instagram it was like 20 people being like oh my god are you drawing a tattoo like can you draw a tattoo for me like and that was such a good reassurance because a you know art is personal it's hard to share sometimes of course i share a lot with you guys so i feel like i really ripped that band-aid off it's not too hard but also like how am i going to be received to the world and being received positively especially if you sent me a nice message thank you i love you so much you deserve the world um but that really put a lot of hope in me and kind of gave me that last little drive to keep pushing and keep working so cheers to new past cheers to new avenues

make the right choices make a big big change in your life today i'm talking if you're tired of your fucking boyfriend and you can't you're like oh i'm just waiting for someone to give me permission to do so bitch leave if you are in a bad workplace find a new one if you are suffering somewhere in your life and you keep asking yourself why do i keep doing this why do i keep suffering make that big fucking change especially now the universe will be on your side if you make that change now it wants you to better yourself to step into the right avenue to step into the right path and to really accept ourselves for who we are and what we deserve you need to know your worth the universe knows your worth but it will not gift you these beautiful things until you are

worthy of accepting them okay until you believe you're worthy of accepting them and until you can see it for yourself honestly so cheers to this full moon it's not as scary as people are believing it to be it'll be a good one i will be spending most of it inside i sat outside shout out to my dad he got me these two like porch chairs he found on the side of the road love it um so i can sit outside and have my morning coffee outside i meal prepped yesterday so i'll be able to make a healthy little lunch maybe a little smoothie drink some green tea do some stretching then i'm gonna vacuum my house and hopefully create some art for just like hours and hours on end as this form of like meditation um that's my goal for the full moon tomorrow i'll be attending my pilates class which

will be very fun um but it's nice to kind of have the past two days off and then having the next two days off to really regroup refresh and really make sure i'm putting my best foot forward because that's what this time is all about some of you guys might be going through some stressful transitionary phases okay the universe might be cutting cords and cutting ties because you have not had the strength to do so yet that's one of the funny things about this time it's only difficult if you don't see it for what it is if you don't take advantage of the situation at hand um the universe will make changes accordingly for you it doesn't like to but it will and it's way way fucking harder to navigate when something is forcefully changed on you versus you making that

first initiative and making that first step so girl you might as well rip the fucking band-aid off before it happens for you inevitably it's going to happen do you want it on your terms or the universe's terms because the universe has some funny silly ways of changing things up in a way that you absolutely could never possibly imagined ever ever I'm like yes I needed to break up with my ex but babe did you need to put me in a life-threatening car accident in order to do so I should have just I should have just done that earlier I could have avoided so much mess anyways anyways learn your lessons don't fall into bad patterns and behaviors take that next step positively into the direction you want to take and have hope dream you know what the fuck

you need to do you know what the right course of action is believe in that and follow through love you love you let's get into your questions how to balance school work and relationships with little free time oh I think key important thing here is work and school are probably going to be the hardest things making sure you are studying in a course that you're interested in will make the school aspect easier even if you're taking like prereqs or the undergrad portion of college just to kind of get things out of the way at least you know you're on the right path and you'll be able to hold hope in that sort of way where it makes it feel all a little worth it putting yourself out there and really just throwing yourself into the courses whether

you're interested or not will make school go by faster as well as work if you are in a workplace that's a fast environment even if it's just like easy simple maybe you're working the front desk as an RA so you can like get homework done and work making sure you're just doing something that is I mean ultimately benefiting you like don't go to school and then work a job that you're not gonna like get any money for like go get a serving job and hustle two days out of the week and make your money that way but make sure it's like a fulfilling work job it doesn't necessarily need to be like oh what i want to do for the rest of my life but at least make sure you're fucking making money and you can like balance that with your school life make sure it's something

semi-enjoyable for you that's why i really enjoyed serving while being in school because hours were flexible I could make like triple the amount of money I would in one day with one shift which meant I worked less and also your time flies you know what I mean I also think being an RA is a great or like a library assistant researcher assistant anything like that where it's kind of in the field of what you want to be while also maybe giving you a little bit more downtime and money love that especially from your school I think that's a great option as well for work but making sure you're in a place that sure it's work but also like it's not that bad making money doing my thing that will make that balance easier relationships as well if you are in a good

relationship if you have healthy relationships especially friendships it's not gonna feel like a chore okay in fact when you finally do have downtime and you're done with school you're done with work it's like okay i could be alone but also hanging out with my friends or my boyfriend gives me the same feeling that alone time would I feel like as long as you have a healthy relationship with all three it makes the overwhelming amount of time that you're spending in those three categories worth it and a lot easier if you hate school because you're doing something you don't like and you hate work because you know it sucks and your manager's mean and you know you're not getting paid for anything and you hate your friends it's gonna be a hard fucking time but

making sure you have each one of those categories like not balanced against each other but simply balanced within themselves it will make balancing all of those fucking things a lot a lot easier um but yeah making sure your school is good you're working hard you're doing your thing making sure your work is good you're making your money you're getting in you're getting out and then like if you need alone time take your alone time but i think the best kind of friendships especially when you're trying to balance a lot of things in your life are the ones who it feels rejuvenating being with them and yes being with your boyfriend should feel rejuvenating it should not feel exhausting tiring like a fucking chore especially in college i've been through many of those college relationships

where you're like why the fuck are they mad at me all the time girls because they hate you move on what i wanted to talk about was basically how to like keep a sense of self for your whole life because i feel like i just don't know who i am not in like a bad way but like i just genuinely you know some people like just have this personality they never change for anyone i can't help but just slightly change myself depending on who i'm around and like some people say to me oh i see you this way and you definitely like you know who you are and you're confident and all this but like i don't see it for myself and i really want to like work on my relationship with you know that quote that's like um you see yourself in comparison

while your soul rots inside you do you guys know that quote i could be butchering it but that's essentially what you're doing to yourself you know who you are you're just not being her do you know what I mean you're living your life in regards of like what other people want from you and what does society want for you and how can I be on this trend and how can I join this thing that's not true identifiers of who you are as a person you know deep down who you are as a person the things you did when you were 12 when you were 10 the things that brought you joy when you were 9 dive back into those so you can get like a refurbished version of like identity in relation to you you don't want identity into like in relation to other people you don't want identity in relation

to your friends or in relation to society because that's going to be an identity that's going to be very fragile because it's built on the latest trend cycles it's built on what people think about you things that are very fragile very egotistical you need to build your identity in relation to who you are what brings you joy what makes you a little weird i think the things that make people weird are some of the most important things I love a weird bitch from infinity to infinity I love a weird bitch I love a bitch who's not afraid to be herself I love a bitch who's just like you know what fuck what other people think about me this is my weird niche interest I'm really into taxidermy animals or something like I love that do not build your

identity in relation to others around you because your soul is rotting inside you maybe that's the quote but essentially that's what you're going through so take the time practice try new things you know that's what life is all about just because you feel like you've lost yourself i also feel like maybe it's because you've outgrown yourself a little bit you've outgrown where you are you're ready to blossom into the butterfly that you truly are so spread your wings babe go out fly around go try new things go express yourself don't hold yourself back and also don't create your identity around the people around you hi hannah do you have any tips or recommendations for clearing smoker lungs illy uh there's also a question right next to it that's asking me do i put lavender in

my bowls i feel like this kind of goes in hand in hand um a no i do not put lavender or anything else in my bowls here's the thing when you're smoking weed you are burning a flower you are ingesting it that's not great for your lungs okay especially if it's smoke obviously breathing smoke into your lungs is not going to be the best now if you're adding extra things in there you're burning extra carcinogens you're breathing in more of that not necessarily the healthier better option also not the best way to ingest herbs i recently have been very into teas especially when it comes to lung health i love a little sesh followed by a hot green tea oh are you kidding me throw some lavender in there if you want the lavender benefits throw some mullion leaf in

there if you want to clear your lungs out but making a really good either chilled iced blackberry green tea or a warm herbal tea afterwards is the best way to ingest herbs you're going to actually get the qualities that you want from the herbs when you're burning them and smoking them you're not going to get as much of the benefits as if you just steeped it in hot water and drank it and you and then you're not adding extra carcinogens to the bowl you're already smoking you're not harming your lungs anymore and you're kind of getting the benefits from it so now i don't put lavender in my bowls i don't think it's the healthiest or best way to consume herbs but i do love a tea and i really have been in my grandma era where i've just been concocting random teas

in my kitchen and especially my boyfriend who has asthma after he smokes i love to make him like a glass or make myself a glass of mullion leaf mullion leaf is so great has so many great properties for clearing lung health and you know just making sure your lung health is in order a little bit of lemon a little bit of honey one tea bag one cup of boiling water sipping on that little peppermint tea at the end of the night chamomile oh my god it is the best also holy shit i'm actually 80 that's insane hi hannah i have been listening to you for so long um basically since i moved out on my own i literally just kind of i'm from the east coast i packed up my little car and i drove five days to oregon with no money no savings literally nothing just

a first month's rent and deposit and a dream and vibes i just wanted to let you know that i've been doing it i am in school now i'm graduating in the spring and i feel like i'm also like working two jobs i'm a server and i'm a preschool teacher and i feel like i wouldn't be able to do it without you and without your guidance and your podcast because it's like my commute it's what i listen to on my commute to work or while i'm getting ready so i just wanted to say thank you and i love you oh that means the fucking world to me because all i want for the people who listen to this podcast are to realize that like the world is yours you can go out there and achieve whatever the fuck you want you can accomplish whatever you want and this is living

testimony you know what i didn't do that for you you did that for you round of applause snaps for you because bitch you did that shit and that is so impressive and i wish nothing but the best for you and i really hope that you know the world treats you well and kindly and the universe keeps opening itself up for up to you because you are deserving of all the blessings i'm proud of you for taking those risks and for achieving your dreams someone said they're falling back into depression how to not be scared of it i feel like when you kind of fear monger it instead of allowing it to be like an emotion that you simply feel and then accept and move on from um it kind of gives it this overwhelming weight that becomes all consuming where it's like i'm getting bad again

i'm getting bad again i was doing so good i'm getting bad again the process of healing and growing is going to be an up and down and up and down and up and down battle so if you allow yourself to be kind and patient during those lows it will help them go by faster my friend actually has been going through a really hard time just overall life stressful mercury retrograde full moon things like i get it girl we're all kind of in a place where it's like redirection if you're not doing that internal work that redirection can be very scary but she's like you know what yesterday was hard today is okay tomorrow will be better and i feel like if you view depression in that sort of sense where it's like yeah it's gonna be a struggle i'm not there the best mentally

but that's okay tomorrow will be better you're setting yourself up for success while also making space for you to understand and process those emotions and really figure out where they're stemming from because ultimately like even if it's a hormonal change and there's nothing really to base your depression on it's just feelings if you feel those things and allow yourself to feel those things and process those things it will make that depression move by so quickly when I was in denial about depression or feeding into it or fear-mongering it that's when it lasted for the years that it did it became a personality it became who i was emotions don't have to be who you are but you do need to give them space to be felt to be seen to be processed and to move on from tomorrow was

hard today it's getting easier tomorrow will be better your take on the under consumption trend honestly new favorite trend love it i feel like this is the age of aquarius really taking over um we've been in our consumption consumption consumption teamu whatever the fuck she in phase where it's like how much shit can i buy for the least amount of money tiktok shop phase not me personally i don't shop on those websites just because mentally i can't do it it's too over stimulating um now i feel like people are really thinking about okay where the where is this clothing coming from is it something i really need is it worth spending money on mostly because the economic state right now is not great so like i want to be spending money on things that are

actually worthwhile and i think it's a great shift in perspective one specific way i have really been practicing under consumption is i don't think people realize a lot of the clothes that you're spending 80 90 100 on are made of plastic babe that's made of plastic and the plastic is seeping into your pores that's why you feel awful all the time that's why your kitty hurts like no I'm kidding but also like you are spending money on things that are literally plastic and then going to disintegrate in one wash so one way especially as a fashionista and probably the most I consume is with clothing is really looking at what is this fabric made of what is the fabric contents what kind of fabric is it is it made somewhere sustainable you know does it look like

it's made well not just a single stitch that's gonna fall apart am I making sure that it is crafted well this is gonna be a lifelong piece because if I'm spending $80 on a t-shirt a pair of pants a leather jacket I don't care what the fuck it is if I'm spending almost $100 on one clothing item that shit better last my entire life my entire life and I feel like we're so used to you know fast fashion trends going quickly that it's like well I'll spend two dollars on the you know new thing that fits into the trend boo boo you're gonna wear it maybe once and then you just wasted so much money when in reality you could spend money on something that's maybe more of a basic a lifelong staple piece you'll get more wear out of it you'll save more money in the long

run because of how much you are utilizing that one piece of clothing so specifically for me my under consumption has really been focused on fashion and clothing and making sure that what i am buying or even at the thrift store what i'm grabbing from the thrift store the mugs the plates the artwork that it's really worth my fucking money because i'm tired of wasting my money willy-nilly on random fucking things I think we all are especially if you are an adult living in America where everything's so expensive um we're tired of wasting our fucking money we're tired of spending it on random shit we're tired of the Shein hauls the Timu hauls the shirt fucking disintegrating in the washer after two washes we are over it and we should be honestly um but yeah

my under consumption recently and love the trend love the trend we should get more into that because we're so based on valuing our worth with what we consume oh new lip liner for the week new body wash for the week a new t-shirt for the week no no i'm over it i'm tired of it i'm tired of that being the trend and i feel like we all are that's why we're seeing a resurgence of like the indie sleaze grunge phase because all that shit none of that shit was brand new unless you bought like a thrasher t-shirt or a pair of the fucking studded jeffrey campbell heels you know what i mean all that shit was found at the thrift store it was handmade that's what made it indie sleaze grunge is because it was pre-worn pre-found and then given a new life that under consumption

trend is resurging especially now it's so funny seeing the parallels especially being a teen and like 2014 2016 when that tumblr era was so popular because now i'm like oh my god finally i'm an adult i have adult money i have an adult ideal like i can live my indie sleeves fantasy and i'm telling you you can't buy indie sleeves fantasy fantasy it comes from going to the thrift store finding a t-shirt cutting the neckline off of it finding a studded belt randomly in the back of closet throwing it on reusing what the fuck you have not consuming a brand new outfit for the sake of going out to dinner um but yes i do think something somewhere small that you can start especially from my fashion perspective is what is your clothing made out of is it going to last you

a lifetime is this a piece worth spending money on if you don't think you can wear it a lifetime then it's not worth spending money on it's just a new trend that's coming and going really thinking about why why do i want this is it because other people have it or is it because it's calling to me asking yourself these hard questions making sure you're spending your hard-earned money on things that are fucking worth it okay i've been listening to your podcast since the beginning you got me through high school and now i am going off to college in a few weeks um i love you so much thank you for the podcast um i have a few questions regarding college i'm going to art school and as an adhd girl i'm a little bit nervous on deadlines and just being productive

and I guess just making friends in general. I'm a relatively outgoing and friendly person but some people just get on my nerves and I really don't want them to show. I don't want to have any issues with my roommates and I don't know just I guess adapting to a different culture as I'm moving literally across the country and I'm not going to know anybody so any tips for kind of not losing my mind when I'm pretty much all alone I'm excited but you know just just a little bit nervous but anyways I love you thank you so much I love you congrats on the big change congrats on art school you're gonna have a lot of fun I feel like art school is great for ADHD girlies because it's like yeah I don't want to pay attention to shit that I don't care

about but like art I'll sit down and do art for eight hours I don't care what it is you know what i mean so you'll succeed don't worry but i think this is a great transitionary question to get into a little bit longer of a topic it's back to school season also i'm so sorry to bring this up this might be triggering to some people but school is starting again growing up and having not been in school for five years now four years now whatever it's been since the pandemic started um i miss the excitement of like school starting the closest you get to that in the adult world is like starting a new job which is pretty rare that you are going to do because i mean you want on your resume to show that you can stay at a job for a long time unfortunately but i miss that excitement that

like refreshed renewal on life like oh who's gonna be in my class like who's gonna be my teacher am i gonna have like a fun little fourth period science class boyfriend like oh what's gonna happen i can't wait i'm finally escaping my parents for the summer because my parents were teachers which meant they were home all summer we need time away from each other i don't mind going back to school because holy shit um but like i miss that excitement um and someone asked fave advice for college freshmen move-in day is next week and i'm nervous love you okay so there's a couple topics i want to go over when it comes to school college and how to navigate it because i not only have succeeded in college but most importantly i have failed so i know how to

do it right um i went from a 2.5 gpa to a 4.0 gpa in the span of one semester in nursing school okay so i know how to fix shit i know what to do right also i had a 4.0 in art school which is extremely hard so trust me this is coming from a good place I'm sorry I didn't graduate but also like the pandemic happened I couldn't control what the fuck was going on I was not gonna pay out of my pocket private school tuition for online art courses that just was not gonna happen luckily I found myself into a new avenue and I am still practicing art so love that but also let's talk about my successes and my fails okay so moving in the dorm the dorm I don't know where you're living I don't know what your dorm situation was like my dorm situation was um

I they were like it was like a suite so it was like two people in one room a connecting bathroom and then two people in the next room so it was a suite in that sort of sense where it's four people sharing two sinks one shower I did not have the communal showers like I think most people do most of my friends in college had communal showers where it's like one floor all girls or whatever we did not have co-ed dorm floors that just seemed like a mess although the floor right above and below us was boys um but i did not have to share showers thank god if you do have to share showers invest in water shoes okay shower flip-flops crocs i don't give a fuck what it is do not put your feet on those nasty ass tiles you do not know what people are doing in those bathrooms please stay

like sanitarily safe make sure you have a good like shower caddy um even in my own like suite i had to make sure i had my own shower caddy because we just didn't want to leave our shit in the shower it was too much going on um so a good shower cat shower caddy alufa whatever you use shampoo conditioner very simple things you can take that there and back with you making sure you have i love the snap towels that kind of like wrap around so you can leave the shower with like your snap a towel dress thing on without having to change like in there because when i'm wet and have to put clothes on oh sensory overload can't do it here's the thing you're moving in everybody's new i talked about this on the patreon podcast a little bit where someone had

just started college and they were feeling like i can't do it i have no sense of you know i have like a sense of hopelessness i you know i'm terrified although i'm like going to school and having fun I'm coming home at the end of the day and I have this like pit in my stomach and all I want to do is go home this is going to be a hard transitionary phase the hardest transitionary phase I've had to face yet in my life I thought it was middle school to high school in reality it was high school to college they say you know oh we're setting you up for success college is going to be so easy we're setting you up they physically cannot set you up for it until you go there and live that experience but everybody especially freshman year is feeling that pit in their

stomach they're going out they're having fun they're coming home they're laying in that fucking bunk bed alone at night and they're feeling that pit in their stomach that like a little bit of fear a little bit of worry oh i'm a little homesick i miss my mom that is a very normal feeling to feel especially during this time of transition so don't let it overwhelm and completely ruin your experience don't feed into the negativity you have a choice whether you make this a positive experience or a negative experience and the only way you can make it a negative experience is by leaning into the fear leaning into you know the sadness the depression the whatever you can feed into that's going to cause a negative reaction everybody's scared right now everybody's a little

nervous they don't know what to do everything's brand new but you need to lean into the hope of it all what you make of this is what you create of it okay so take advantage of the opportunities put yourself out there chit chat with people don't go home early in the night like hang out on the dorm floor in the communal areas and talk to people you know what I mean go hang out in the library make sure you're not just in your dorm room that's the one way I really killed my grades especially that first semester was by never leaving my dorm room yes you need to make sure it's comfortable okay make sure you have a good pair of sheets make sure you have laundry detergent make sure you're doing your fucking laundry all right babe make sure you have enough like comfy

clothing to wear to class i felt like i was on my fashionista bullshit my first semester of college no after my 8 a.m is like babe i just want to be comfortable make sure you have comfy clothes enough socks and underwear to last you a lifetime when it came to dorm room stuff all i really cared about was if i had food to eat like honestly as long as my bed was comfy my pillow was comfy i had a good blankets and i had some food to munch on at one o'clock or 1 a.m after studying or after partying i was good i was good the food essentials you need in your dorm room are the velveta mac and cheese microwavable bowls okay those saved my life also ramen noodles i lived exclusively off of those two things for probably three years now that air fryers exist i feel like that really

would have changed my whole experience because like bitch you can pop some dino nuggies in there and that oh my god now you have a hot meal are you kidding me maybe invest in an air fryer i don't know if that's the best idea but as long as you have a refrigerator and you can put your things away I like the dry goods where I can just pop it in the microwave make sure you have some very easy food to prepare baby you ain't preparing a salmon dinner as a freshman in college there is no need eat from the dining hall steal from the dining hall bitch I would take empty jugs like milk jugs take it down there fill it up with milk I got yelled at a few times but also like i would say hello i'm paying for this and they'd be like oh and walk away like do we really have

a problem here let me steal my milk for my cereal steal from the dining halls if you don't have food go make 10 sandwiches at the dining halls and take your tote bag in and stuff your tote bag with as many sandwiches as you can possibly fit i used to take containers with me like deli containers and i would steal chicken rice fresh veggies take it back to my dorm room and then munch on it for weeks at the end of the day you are paying for the resources in your college make sure you're utilizing them make sure you are utilizing them to the full extent that you possibly can especially in that dining hall having a roommate might be a little weird but as long as you're kind to each other and understanding with each other and you kind of like buddy up like buddy buddy a little

bit that first couple of months you're there it's gonna be a lot easier okay your roommate is basically a built-in best friend for the first couple months until you guys find your own groups so like lean into the experience of it all lean into the new connections who cares if you're not sure if it's going to last a lifetime just try and connect with new people and expand your horizons that way making sure that you have friends in college is going to make the experience a lot easier because you're not going to feel as alone and unfortunately making friends only comes from putting yourself out there and talking go to the clubs go try new things there was like a b club at my first college that i really wish i would have joined little things like that anything

you find interesting put yourself out there go and try colleges about experiencing and learning but yeah the whole dorm situation as long as you're comfortable kind you're not being weird you're not playing your music too fucking loud you're you know maybe baking cookies for everybody once a month and like meeting people that way small little interactive things like that making sure you're comfortable making sure your bed is clean and comfy making sure you're taking care of yourself physically okay showering doing your laundry making sure you have a little bit of food hidden somewhere in your room granola bars protein bars things like that you'll be good in the dorms okay like i said social put yourself out there talk to people get to know your roommates

get to know your neighbors get to know the people in your class you can step into your first year of college pretending you're like a whole new person so you can like pretend you're confident i don't give a fuck if you're not confident pretend you are i don't give a fuck if you weren't the most popular girl in high school bitches this is college now everybody's at an equal playing field pretend you are putting yourself out there and being a kind individual and really just being somebody that's a smile in the crowd is so comforting and you will be received so well join those clubs talk to the people don't be too afraid once again everybody is as nervous as you are everybody has that pit in their stomach do not let it overcome the fun

and the gifts that are ahead of you let's talk about lectures um i fucked up my first year school because i went to lectures and i did not pay attention i did not take notes i did not i i thought like i could do it like high school where i sat there and i stared at my teacher and then i process all the information that's not going to work the lectures that you're receiving in college are about a week's worth of information from high school so you need to actively be taking notes do not get on that fucking ipad do not get on your fucking computer do not type it do not draw it you're going to take a pen and a piece of paper and you are going to write down every single fucking thing especially as an ADHD girly the only way I was able to actively listen in a

four and a half hour lecture was by writing everything the fuck down you can color code it and organize your notes later and in fact I highly encourage taking messy notes during the lecture and then organizing it and going back over the powerpoints after your lecture so you can kind of reprocess it and re-understand the information a little bit better but writing down your lectures and actively listening in those lectures will go so far sitting in the front row of your lecture makes a huge difference if you put yourself out there and you're in the front row every day and you're engaging with your professor and you're struggling and you go to that professor and you say hey I need help I would love to you know set up some office hours I would love it if you help

me they are going to be more willing to help you and to help you navigate a tough time if you are actively engaging and participating and showing that you want to try versus if you show up every day don't take any notes don't talk to the professor and sit in the back of the class they're not going to want to help like help you as much you have to show initiative in order to receive like that initiative in a sense um so yeah lectures write that shit down do not open your computer the amount of online shopping i did in college that was so unnecessary and then i would blink and it's like holy shit what the fuck are we talking about do not open your computer and lecture the powerpoints are going to be up there okay now if you need it for some reason there's

an activity you're doing sure sure whatever but lecture wise write that shit down sit in the front of the class talk to your professors get to know them raise your hand ask questions you're in college you're here to learn to grow to really strengthen your brain muscle so make sure you're engaging in that way. You're going to spend about 10% of your time in lectures and 90% of your time studying. That's just how it is. Lectures are all about just getting the information to you. Studying is about processing the information. You're not going to be able to process the information in lectures very well just because there's going to be so much. I talked about the notes. You're going to need to write down all of your notes. You're going to need to organize and rewrite down all

of your notes a lot of my studying for nursing school where i was having to memorize like a hundred different functions of the body every week and then having a full-blown like not even quiz test on all of that shit i would have to write down all of my notes again write them down again write them down again the best way for your brain to really memorize is through writing i also did this with flashcards i would make all my flashcards i would go through them and then i would mark the ones that I didn't know and then I would rewrite them all down, go through them again, mark down the ones I didn't know, write them all down again, go over them. A lot of my studying was simply writing and quizzing myself. Quizlet will save you. I know you guys know what Quizlet is. Writing

will save you. Flashcards, especially if you have to memorize a lot of stuff, will save you. Physical flashcards that you can take around, that you can bring around with you, that you can randomly test yourself over. I loved Quizlet because there were different ways of testing yourself and different ways of like making sure you understand the knowledge without the overall flashcard flipping thing which was very very nice but I do think a lot of my learning came from rewriting down notes rewriting down lecture notes and rewriting down powerpoint notes it would force me to slow down to process to really think about what I was writing down and I feel like a lot of my active learning came from that specifically also studying is gonna suck it's gonna suck it's gonna be hard

but if you're with good friends or if you make sure you're in a place where you can study here's the thing your dorm room is not for studying you need to make sure your dorm room is like a place for comfortability for relaxation as long as you set that precedent early on you're gonna succeed very well make sure your dorm room is for like you know easy little homework assignment turn and things and then relaxing so as soon as you step foot into your dorm room it's like your brain signals to itself okay we are decompressing now we are winding down we're gonna get some sleep make sure that is a safe space for you to do so but that also means any studying that you have to do serious studying is going to have to be outside of your dorm room whether it's in the library that

was my favorite place to do it there's like in my old college there was like a common space with like a starbucks that we could all go sit at and hang out and that was really nice um but just making sure you're in a separate place for studying and categorizing those places in your brain it will really help your brain focus and function a lot better especially as an ADHD girly if I don't know what to expect but my brain already knows what to expect I'm gonna have a much easier time so studying is going to be happening in the silent library if you need it okay in the communal area if that's a good place for you especially with the background noise I felt like that was a really good place for me um but do not study in your dorm room I mean sure

every once in a while random little flash card flip through the small little assignments sure but the biggest lesson my dad gave me was make sure you have a place that is like signified in your brain as we are calming down we are relaxing and making that my dorm room was so so nice because as soon as I stepped foot in that bitch I was like good night I'm chilling out I'm putting on a Netflix show I'm showering I'll think about the other stuff when I step foot out of the storm room and making sure that was a safe space for me really really helped my mental health and actually made my studying a lot better when I finally did put myself in that library now let's talk about the fun stuff okay partying partying in college now this is also the lack of

like paying attention in lectures and then the over consumption of partying is why my GPA was so low now i was able to get it back up with studying my ass off and actually starting to pay attention in lectures and only partying when necessary but babe you don't need to be out drinking monday through sunday that's not necessary it's really not i love you but like you can do it two days out of the week also it's okay to be like i can't do that today because i need to study and I need to focus on this thing I have coming up that's okay it's okay to say no it's okay to say I can't do this but also you're young and you're in college and you're gonna want to party and I highly recommend doing so I had so much fun at my college parties like that was the whole point of

going to college I get it to get out to have a good time the amount of times I spent like at the frat houses my friend falling down the fucking back stairs doing keg stands like dancing having a good time i highly recommend you do so but also understand that there is a time for partying and there's a time for paying the fuck attention and making sure you're getting your shit done guess what you're not allowed to party if you don't get your shit done so you better get into that library and study until 8 p.m go home make yourself a thing of ramen change take a shot go out do you know what i mean it's all about balance when it comes to partying and if you allow yourself to party without actually achieving the things you want to do you're gonna fall into a spiral

you're gonna fall into a spiral like i did okay like i did now when it comes to partying and love please do not focus on love your first year of college okay that's what sophomore year is for trying to find love freshman year of college is going to be difficult because everybody's focused on finding themselves and if you're not focused on finding yourself you're gonna lose yourself that's all freshman year is about finding yourself in that space of college in that space of you know newness and understanding who you are in relation to it that needs to be your goal focus um a college making sure you're passing your classes but also making sure you are staying stable do not focus on love during this time it is not your it's not love island you don't need

to find love freshman year of college focus on you you will have years you know in the future where you have the college thing down it's easy it's just a part of the routine now you can actually focus on flirting and all those things but babe don't fall in love with the most recent frat guy that you find at the first party your freshman year red flags all around all around okay make sure you're staying safe at these parties don't accept drinks from random strangers ever okay especially at the frat parties do not drink out of the fucking jungle juice trust me i've been roofied i know what it's like i've had friends who have been roofied you need to be safe make sure you get a handle safely from somebody and you go out and you have fun and you

know where your shit's coming from don't indulge in any unnecessary drugs i mean smoke weed if you want drink if you want but also like you need to be safe in these environments because it's not an environment set up for safety it's an environment set up for fun and one person's fun is also one person's hell so make sure you're aware you have a way to get there and get home that you're with people you're you trust do not show up to these parties alone make sure you are with friends who are trustworthy that will pay attention to you and make sure you are safe okay you gotta party safely you gotta party and that and if you party safely you ultimately will have the most fun um but it's a balance make sure you get that shit done make sure you turn in your assignments make

sure you're studying so then you can have fun on the weekends there's no reason you need to go get blacked out at 3 p.m on a Monday give it a year give it a year you'll get there but like make sure you have the schoolwork balanced before you dive straight into the partying the amount of people I know who have dropped out of car out of college for partying and now they just are walking in circles in their life yeah don't let momentary desire ruin your future trust and last but not least just surviving college i feel like a lot of it is a survival game like i said in the beginning a lot of people are walking around especially freshman year with these pits in their stomach like am i doing the right thing i'm worried this is hard i'm struggling like i miss my mom i want

to go home every single person is dealing with that you are not alone so finding like-minded people that you can talk about these things with um reaching out to mental health professionals on campus and making sure you have a support system contacting your academic advisor and talking to your professors if you're struggling that is the best way to survive during this time making sure you are indulging in the resources around you and you are not self-isolating college is not a time to self-isolate it's to meet people like-minded unlike-minded individuals to conversate to get to know each other to get to learn about yourself in relation to others the best way to survive during this time is to make sure you're putting yourself out there and you're

opening opening yourself up to every possibility I had a very severe mental health struggle my freshman year of college a lot of that was induced by substance abuse and by self-isolation and I was dating a lame man and also I was in a profession that maybe I wasn't too interested in especially nursing school I'm sure it was a struggle whatever everything is but obviously it was something that i did not want to do um and i didn't allow my space to allow myself space to feel these things and to maybe make the right decisions i just sat and suffered you do not have to suffer there are resources out there and people out there who don't want you to suffer you need to not want to suffer as well okay don't self-isolate reach out join those clubs put yourself out there this is a time

where you can literally step into college and pretend you're a whole different person my friend changed her name her first year of college like she went to college with a new name because she just felt like she needed a new attitude you know a new persona to really put out there like this is a time where you can really become whoever the fuck you want you just need to know who that person is and step into them fully you can do it you don't have to suffer there are resources out there for you to grasp onto that will help you stay afloat reach out to those things reach out to those people make sure you're making good friends make sure you're putting your best foot forward you will succeed if you believe you will succeed everything's a struggle especially during

this time it's gonna be hard but that doesn't mean it's impossible in fact all the best things are going to be difficult to achieve because the easy things are not always the most necessary things the easy things are not always the things that are really going to completely 360 our lives unfortunately those usually are the hard things and the earlier on in your life that you learn to deal and process with hard things the easier the rest of your life will become so open yourself up to these experiences open yourself up to the hardships sit with yourself understand yourself give yourself forgiveness and time and patience and you will survive okay school doesn't have to be so scary it's gonna be a hard transitional time but also like oh i miss like the endless

opportunities that college really gave you and I think it is a beautiful time and I do think everybody should go to it and I do really regret dropping out okay if any of you are like but should I babe I highly regret dropping out unfortunately it was a pandemic thing but you know it is what it is I am where I am but that means I will always speak up and try and make sure that people do have the best experience possible so I love you stay strong get that big brain energy going okay strengthen that muscle you deserve to succeed but you have to believe you deserve to succeed okay step into okay full moon mercury retrograde step into who the fuck you want to become make that big change today so yourself tomorrow will be the best possible version best possible outcome

ever all right that was a long topic so sorry but i did want to do kind of a more in-depth back to school chit chat but the rest of our time let's kind of do a question roulette for you what should i do about my boyfriend's wandering eye break up with him what do you mean wandering eye what do you mean like is he messaging other girls on instagram break up is he texting his ex break up is he texting other girls snapchatting other girls engaging in conversation with other girls flirtatiously break up with him a man who cannot provide trust for you is not a man that you need around you the most important quality in a man is trustworthiness and if you do not hold trust for your partner then there is no ground or basis for a healthy relationship to

bloom oh the older sister advice really came out harsh there so sorry about that oh this is cute you know what journal prompt for the week what are four things you admire about yourself and why help on how i can be more confident i think this is a great confidence journal prompt because we all have four things that we admire about ourselves i feel like we just indulge in maybe the self-negative things a little bit too much and this is a great reminder to like refocus because like you are cool you just have to identify those things and really uplift them so let's see a number one i'm extremely hard working you can put me anywhere and like i'll figure it out i'll handle it i'll get that shit done um and honestly very inspiring because like on we have no choice but

to succeed do you know what i mean especially if you're failing so much it's like well also like don't put too much of an emphasis on failing but if you can succeed go for it and I love that I have the attitude of like you know what fuck it I'll figure it out I'll handle it I'll get this shit done we unfortunately have no choice number two I love how artistic and creative I am and recently I've really been leaning into it because I have realized how much joy that it does bring me especially you know reoccurring themes looking back at 2014 me and like what really made me passionate um and i've really been intentional about stepping back into those creative habits and hobbies and honestly i am so good at them and i love seeing myself succeed in that avenue and

really just express myself creatively um it's been such an eye-opener and i've really been appreciative of just how many avenues i can be creative in whether it's cooking drawing sewing anything um I love that I'm just open to it all and willing to try number three um hmm you know what I love the little fashionista that has really jumped out within me um I always wanted to be a fashionista a little girly but I mean when I was younger like I could buy some clothes for myself whatever I worked for and my mom would buy me like back to school things that's about it but I felt like there was really no room for me to express myself fashion wise it was always like go change you know like cute but go change um and I really lost about 10 years of time

where I couldn't really express myself or I didn't understand how to express myself like in fashion and recently I feel like I've really found that especially outside of the eye of like the newest trend cycles and what does society want for me and really thinking about like how I want to express myself and how I want to dress I really admire that I have taken the time to work through that and to authentically express myself through clothing now um and number four I love how loving I am I love that I always give people a second chance I love that I always hold hope for things I love that I don't let you know the haters get me down or whatever like I always understand and see things from new perspectives and I'm able to process them in a way where it's like you know

what it's all love like fuck it even if you hate me it's because you love me you know what I mean like i love that i will never let the negatives in life uh overwhelm me or turn me negative like i won't let other people drag me to the depths of hell with them i always see love and light for what it is um and i really value that highly in my life but yeah this is a great journal prompt if you are having a hard time with self-confidence or you need to build yourself up write down right now four things you admire about yourself you asked for questions for your podcast last um and lately I've just been feeling like I'm missing out on the full college experience because I don't have a friend group like a big group people I have like a couple friends

that I hang out with like occasionally but I've never been in like a big friend group and I just kind of feel like I'm missing a crucial part to college I don't think you're missing a crucial part to college I think you're withholding yourself a little bit because you can be a part of those big friend groups you just got to reach out and put yourself out there do you know what I mean also it's okay to go through college with like a couple simple friends that's what I did and they were great until one of them stabbed me in the back oop but it was fantastic having my like three little girlies that I hung out with every day and then my one estranged friend to at a big friend group and just seeing them because honestly that's all I had time for if

you want to be in a big big friend group and you want like a bunch of friends in college join a sorority join a sorority I think that's what you're looking for you're looking for like an organized group of girlies that you can go hang out with kind of like a group that you can just go jump right into and you can become a part of sorority I mean your sophomore year junior year senior year and if i had cooler sororities like if i went to cu boulder or something then i would have been a sorority girl but i went to a catholic school so the sororities were not really kicking but i was chilling with my couple friends it's all about what you make of it if you're like oh i'm in a lack mentality i don't have any friends it's like yeah then you don't but if you're like

you know i love my three friends and i'm open to joining bigger friend groups then you have you like kill that lack mentality and you're immediately setting yourself up for success it's all about what you make of it it's okay to feel also like a little lonely and like you want to make more friends but also you're not going to make more friends by being like oh i wish they'd come talk to me girl go talk to them go say hey you know what i mean there's always room for new friendships you can make new friendships at any age okay don't hold yourself back to who you made freshman year some of my best friendships were made like sophomore junior year so open yourself up join a sorority also if you really want a big group of friends i recently love going to clubs

when no one could come with me is it safe to go alone um recently i think there's been kind of a bigger spike in danger but as long as you are not going to clubs and like taking random drinks for people and taking a lot of drugs and blacking out i think as long as you stay aware of your environment somebody knows where you are you're sharing your location you're updating your friends you know as long as you're taking precautions to stay to stay safe I think it's okay like I go to a lot of concerts alone I don't necessarily go to clubs alone or like bars alone because I'm not single um but like if I was in my single phase I definitely would be doing so but the best way to stay safe is you know being aware of your surroundings not letting yourself get too

belligerent making sure somebody knows where you are not going home with strangers things like that only talking to girls you know don't entertain any bummy men but i do think you can go to club safe um especially alone just be aware and also have fun scared of growing up honestly every year just become more stable my brain is slowly solidifying and understanding itself a little bit more i am learning more about myself with every year that comes i'm becoming cooler hotter sexier i think i'm gonna be 80 and like hitting my peak there is no peak okay i just literally keep evolving and getting cooler and as long as you look at aging like that where it's like every year i hold hope for myself to be a better sexier cooler hotter version then you will

continuously be that way but if you're like oh i peaked in high school it's only downhill from there you're setting yourself up for failure you know what i mean growing up doesn't have to be scary i feel like a lot of people look at it as like a beauty way like oh i don't want to be old with wrinkles but it's like bitch who cares we're all gonna age and die anyways why would you withhold yourself to these harsh rules and boundaries when you can just live and experience and become the best version of yourself it's all about what you perceive it as how to take rejection like a baddie as a sensitive girly it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them if you're not their cup of tea that's fine but also like don't force yourself to be a

certain type of person to make someone else happy you're ultimately going to be miserable trying to appease other people because in fact a lot of people are miserable and a lot of people are suffering and they want everybody else to suffer with them so if you get rejected don't take it personally literally nothing to do with you everything to do with them maybe they're not in the right place maybe they blah blah blah literally who cares what the fuck they think it's kind of just like well thank you for telling me now i have a straight answer let's move forward i feel like i would rather get rejected right off the spot than be in a situation ship because situationships go get like become so time consuming and overwhelming because you don't know and you

want to figure out that's suffering babe like you should know they should know and you should be able to communicate that to each other very simple very simple so honestly rejection thank you for fucking telling me so i can make adequate changes and decisions in my life to make sure i am being upheld and withheld in a loving safe space and if you can't give that to me thank you for telling me you know thank you for releasing me in that sort of way but i do see a lot of girlies suffering in situationships because men are too fucking uh emotionally and intellectually stupid to put their thoughts and feelings into words and they know they're not going to get no pussy when they're like well no i don't want to date you so they just don't say it babe say it tell me what's going on

and if you're in a situation ship and you're suffering in that sort of sense ask him what do you want with me and if he if he can't tell you it's because he doesn't want you please move on please find someone who actually does want you who won't reject you who will give you the time of day i'm begging for yourself ladies i'm begging hi i'm olivia it's raining really hard to make be able to hear that but um i'm a big fan of the podcast but i am so depressed right now i got broken up with the other day and it was semi-mutual and on good terms but i almost feel like that's worse like we have no reason to hate each other um it was just a not wanting to continue long distance type of thing but i feel pretty shattered and uh if you have any advice on

finding myself again because it was pretty codependent at least on my end and i don't know how to proceed or where to begin so love you thank you oh i love that it's raining in the background because that's the universe literally washing you away i don't think you realize that but like the universe is literally cleansing you the earth is cleansing you with that big rainstorm in the background you need to do that to yourself as well i have been through this i've been through this exact exact situation where it's like we're breaking up but we love each other but it's because long distance and we just can't do it guess what give yourself a year you will realize that man was a piece of shit and it's a good thing you guys broke up don't worry

don't worry but right now it sucks because all you can see are the good things because the relationship was like kind of mutual stop focusing on the good things go out and live your life the best way to get over a breakup no matter what the situation was by going is just by going out experiencing this does not mean you have to go party and hook up with people i'm talking go to the local chili's at eight o'clock in the evening and go get yourself a triple dipper and just hang out and chill with your hometown bestie go you know like go on a walk down your dirt road while it's raining you know like little things like that like indulging in like the post-breakup narcissistic activities are honestly very very healthy um doing those little like nostalgic

activities indulging in different ways that you never would have thought of being a little crazy after the breakup eating a pint of ice cream while watching your favorite rom-com i think those are the most cathartic ways to really release and process a breakup but the more you dwell on the positive things and oh but I miss but I miss the more you're going to withhold yourself so focus on the future focus on moving forward focus on I think if you want to focus on the good things ask yourself like what do you want to see in your next partner set boundaries for those things and what kind of like behaviors are important to you what are you know necessary for your next partner in the future if you do want to think about good things you know take the good things from your

relationship and remember them and uphold those things so you can hopefully find them in the next but when it comes to processing a breakup especially one where you're still like a little confused about it I think you just got to get out there and have those lived experiences and really just indulge and connect back to the real world especially if it's codependent and you've been withholding yourself from the world a little bit get out there go sit in a local park and just stare at people go apple picking alone go to the local library and go check out a book and talk to your local librarians it doesn't need to be any big important crazy things a lot of the things that are important after a breakup are simply just experiencing and being out there so get out there

go the world is opening itself to up to you with open arms you need to receive it anyways with that being said we are rounding out the end of our podcast here thank you for joining thank you for being you thank you for staying hot sexy and hopefully sane during this full moon retrograde transition i'm gonna go make myself a fat smoothie i'm gonna go do a little yoga thank you to all the collins also i will be doing this again um i kind of just got out of the swing of things and totally forgot to upload those every week but i will be including collins now especially if you're putting a poll out and most of you guys enjoy them love it love hearing your beautiful voices and your questions straight from the source so if you have a call and that you want to submit to me just

dm me a voice message on instagram at hannah marlene and i will answer it there um actually this is uploaded there's also a chili peanut noodle upload video very easy if you need a good like dorm recipe it's literally like three four ingredients noodles fantastic great source of carbs good for your brain um so yummy a great little fall recipe as well um and if you want to see more from me and you want your question answered every single week join the patreon i do an extra patreon episode every week where i do answer every single one of your patreon questions i just uploaded a full moon review survival guide plus um journal prompts i do journal prompts every week i'll also be uploading um some affirmations for the week to keep us sane hopefully and much

much more fun content on patreon patreon.com smoke slash shawty you already know shout out to the girlies on there shout out for you being here thank you for listening thank you for showing up and supporting me every week and also showing up and supporting yourself because ultimately i think the one major goal that we all have here as you know podcast joiners is how can i better myself how can I change and grow into the individual that I truly want to become and unfortunately I can only tell you so much before you have to start taking action you are in direct control and you know in charge of your life we are the narrator of our own life and we can create this life into anything we want to become I'll talk a little bit about being the narrator of

our own life next week it's a big write-up I've been working on but how we speak about ourself and how we speak about the world around us and taking very delicate steps in the right direction is so important. And only we can make a change in our lives to become who we truly want to be. So with that being said, I'll be attending 11.30 a.m. Paul Lottie's tomorrow.

Very excited. I'll report back to the girlies, see how I liked it. I'm sure I'll love it, of course. But that's the one big step that I'm making in my life. What's one big step that you are doing to move your life in a positive direction of where you actually want to see yourself? question for the week love you stay hot stay sane you deserve everything go out there go achieve it

and I will see you all next week