Smoke Sesh - bad habits, hoe phase & oversharing

Episode Date: May 19, 2026

hello hotties and welcome back! we have a lot to catch up on today, such as what I've been up to, doing what you love even if you're tired, taking breaks, burnout, that damn phone, getting off the phone, getting into your life, getting creative, bad habits, doing what you love, being bored, practicing what you love, painting exercises, you'll figure it out, growing up, post grad, going to art school, higher education, is it worth it going to college, living it up, living life to the fullest, is it worth going through a ho3 phase? from ho3 to husband, keeping things spicy, being spontaneous, decluttering, emotional attachment, toy storying your life, plastic surgery, staying fit, getting moving, oversharing, keeping things to yourself, evil eye, protecting yourself, gossiping, talking shit and much much more!join the patreon! new episodes (and more) at patreon.com/smokeseshshawtysubmit your questions and call ins every week on instagram.com/hannahmarlenewatch the new vlogs every Sunday on YouTube at hannahmarlene444

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash, so come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life, the good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing, I've got a story for it all. Hello baddies, welcome back to another episode of Smoke Sash. my name is Hannah, your host, and I am so excited to be here, but I am so tired. So tired that literally I went to go record this. I sat down, I filmed like five minutes, and I realized the

camera wasn't even on. Babe, hello? Anybody home? So I'm chugging the Celsius. I did also have a Red Bull before that. I know I'm tired when Celsius does literally nothing to give me energy. it's like okay actually I think I just need eight hours but going off the themes of last week which was just bitch doing it tired oh boy have I been doing so but it's a different kind of tired I feel like when I'm just doing things that I don't enjoy don't love not enthralled by I'm tired in a way that makes my soul tired but at least nowadays I'm like I'm exhausted but my soul is fulfilled so there is like this peaceful quality about it but mama needs some rest I have been just out and about there's something about spring and summer coming up that has me moving and grooving and

doing as much as possible I have been out at the stables every single day every single day I did like a two and a half hour ride like six mile ride on Tuesday I did some arena work on Wednesday I took my dad out to go meet my horse because he was a bit skeptical but I put I put him up on her and he got to ride her around it was super cute very wholesome moment um and then yeah I've just been out there every day since I got a new saddle I've been getting all my things together I also I'm just like bitch if I have a horse if I have a horse I better like utilize that as much as possible and even just like go and brush her out and spend some time with her if I'm not riding why the fuck would I not get off work fly out there fly out there go to work I don't care if

I have free time I'd rather be out there than on my phone doing absolutely nothing at home because in reality that's probably what I would be doing with my free time and I've just been I've just been fucking sick of the phone lately we'll get into that we'll get into that but bear with me as this Celsius metabolizes in my brain and hopefully get some energy flowing through these veins babe it was a good little morning though I have a very busy summer coming up birthday coming up a lot coming up and I just have been trying to stay as present and aware as possible and to try and just like utilize and max out my days as much as possible I feel like when I was younger I would be like oh sleeping beauty if I don't get my rest in the afternoon post lunch then how am I gonna

even survive and it's like okay yeah sure but also you're setting those rules up for yourself and in reality you are not that exhausted you can go do more with your day but I am hitting a point where I've been just doing so much that I do actually need an evening to myself so I'm so excited I'm excited to be at home tonight I'm doing this podcast and then I'm immediately taking an everything shower I'm immediately gonna make a fat bowl of pasta munch on that do my laundry vacuum and then just like rot for a little bit in bed because I do deserve some rest and once you hit that wall especially even if you are doing what you love and just doing it tired anyways you do eventually hit a wall we're human we can't just go go go go go

forever and when you feel that coming on if you don't allow yourself to take an adequate break you will crash and burn and so it really is all about balancing that energy and i'm trying to max that out as much as possible recently and i feel like i've been finding a really good balance where if i do need a rest i take it i take my little time to myself whether it's 15 minutes whether it's five hours whether it's a day i utilize my time accordingly and i get out and i enjoy as much as i can so when i am home and it is time to go to bed my head hits that pillow and bitch i am out i'm out so it's been a good little week so far i hope you guys have been feeling the energy as well we had a new moon on saturday a tourist new moon so if you've been feeling the

of the vibe of like oh let's chill let's focus on self let's focus on home if you randomly accomplished an entire list of to-dos that's probably why i think it's a really good renewing energy that we need as things are starting to heat up okay the world our lives our plans our summer plans everything's starting to heat up and get a little bit um fiery as one might say this is your reminder to put your feet in the fucking grass chill out don't use those horns on things that don't matter protect your energy that's what it's all about if you want to know more about the the new moon the upcoming full moon we got one more full moon for the month join the patreon patreon.com smoke society i do full moon write-ups new moon write-ups every time

we have one so you know what to expect and also if you're a spiritual girly maybe some spells to kind of help you manifest or release accordingly to what is going on in the universe in the stars if you enjoy this podcast i do an extra episode every single week so if you're listening to this and you're craving more there is always more on the patreon and if you join you get the entire backlog of every single episode i have done so that is just a shit ton of content for under ten and also if you've been enjoying the vlogs which I have been enjoying the vlogs the vlogs have been you know just providing me a new little outlet I've been having such a good time making those on youtube youtube at hannahmarlene444 um if you want to see those early if you love binging them

I upload them early every single week on the patreon as well so go support me patreon.com slash smoke slash shawty kisses I love my patreon girls so much they know that but it must be said and the love must be shared nothing really else to catch you guys up on i'm kind of in a limbo period before i go on my birthday trip i will be going to california we're spending about a week out there we're going to be doing um a little bit of la running around downtown malibu girly vibes and then heading out to the redwoods and just kind of getting lost in nature i purposely booked an Airbnb that did not have cell service so I would be forced to kind of like log off and just like meditate a little bit in nature because listen okay you know what let's talk about the phone

let's talk about the phone we've talked about the phone before we talk about the phone a lot let's talk about the phone because I've actually been taking adequate steps in my life to get the fuck off of it and it's actually succeeded so let me tell you what's worked for me so far I get questions about this every week every single week where it's like please help me take charge of my life please help me live it please help me get off the phone and if I'm being honest I also have a hard time with it especially being like kind of deliberate in ignoring my problems because I'm like well I have to be on the phone it's how I do my work it's like yeah sure but that doesn't mean you need to be scrolling for six plus hours on top of that just kidding it's not that much but

it has been in past my main issue of the phone I feel like how I use it is very productive whether it's work yes okay love um Pinterest where it's like okay I'm just looking at fun little pretty pictures I'm like online scrapbooking same thing with Tumblr I'm finding inspiration there's only so much I can scroll on those even Instagram I love Instagram I'm a big proponent of Instagram I don't use the same way many people do I use the same way I would use Pinterest but also posting along as if that is my digital scrapbook making reels as if that's my digital scrapbook just in general having fun when you're scrolling on reels that you hit a point where you're like it's been 15 minutes of real scrolling this is enough I'm good I can't really hit that like self-depreciating

flow state that TikTok allows I don't know what it is about the TikTok brain rot that is so special but it really has this wormhole like effect that just sucks me the fuck in. I do think after spending some time away, I have realized why that is, but I'll tell you how I've spent some time away. I got banned. I got banned on TikTok for impersonation. Hello, impersonation of myself. Let's be real. So of course, TikTok updates, you know, once they like flag your account or whatever it takes sometimes like weeks to months for somebody to finally review it and be like okay this is stupid approved so i didn't have the inherent need to post on there danger what the hell don't mind my fat ass son get down blocking the camera so sorry about that i didn't

have an ability to post on there at all so i was like okay the only reason i would be getting on here is to scroll and I at first I did still have the inherent need to scroll and I'd be like okay let me scroll a little bit let me scroll a little bit but then I slowly stopped wanting to get on there because I'm like I can't even fucking post what's the point that's really the whole reason I have it is to post if I can't post what's what is the point why am I on here oh to scroll okay cool so naturally my brain just started feeling adverse to it and I started stepping away and not even opening the app if I did open the app I would get bored within five minutes because the time away made me when I got on there actually pay attention to the content it was feeding me

and bitch that is a fear-mongering app that app if I'm on it for five minutes and I get off my nervous system is shot my nervous system it feels like I am being hunted as a human it feels as if I've just been running through the forest for days being chased by men with guns that's how it feels to scroll on that app for five minutes I miss the days when it first came out and it was like silly little dance video silly little person dumb little trend funny little story clever little joke that's how it was at first and it was good but bitch that place is a fear-mongering hole and you can make the argument oh but it's all about the algorithm so if you're commute commute i don't care it literally is not about the algorithm because my algorithm on instagram

beautiful perfect ducklings horse videos girls doing their hair nail inspiration love it tiktok none of that it's like murder in your city bad review bad customer interaction karen caught live on video young child being kidnapped it's like what the fuck is going on what is going on and just simply taking a step away really made me start thinking about like why am I doing this what am I getting out of it and like how can we kind of adjust accordingly because obviously I'm not enjoying it so why the fuck do I keep doing it and at the end of the day if you ever have any sort of bad habit where you're like kind of thinking about it where you're like i don't even like doing this why do i keep inherently wanting to do to do this and how can i stop

we're gonna go over that i've come to these conclusions about many different bad habits in my life boys bad relationships bad friendships fucking vaping cigarettes picking at my skin molly like meth no i'm just kidding well who knows what it was i was not testing it the fucking phone which dare i say is stronger than meth as someone who maybe possibly has fucking done meth way stronger we all find ourselves coming to conclusions about things in our life where we're like what the fuck and why the fuck and it's important that you catch yourself in those moments because that's how you make the change a you have that wake up moment where you're like seeing yourself from a third perspective watching yourself do the horrible awful thing that you've

been doing enduring the same negative thing that you've been enduring self-sabotaging the same ways that you have always been and you go bitch wake the fuck up like you want to reach out and shake your own shoulders and be like bitch stop it stop it it's not helping you like please god pay attention now i will say from one bad habit loving bitch to another it does take it takes a little bit of time for you to realize that it does takes a takes you doing that bad habit often often with negative consequences for you to go what the fuck am i doing but when you have that realization you can make the change you just have to step in and be stronger than your mind listen bad habits are addicting for a reason it's because they're going to give you an instant dopamine

boost and then they're going to give you an instant crash and that instant crash is going to make you feel bad about yourself and feeling bad about yourself is very addicting because it's very easy to feel bad about yourself dare i say sometimes it's kind of hard to feel good about yourself but negative emotions will always oddly enough outpower positive emotions that's why we see so many like really negative politicians or leaders using a lot of negative fear-mongering tactics because it's easier to control people through that than it is positivity i don't know why it's so hard for people to latch on to positivity because bitch we need it nowadays but it is much easier for people to attach on to fear and hatred of self than it is anything else

so you become like chemically addicted to that bad habit because of that dopamine boost to instant crash and then you know what causes the next dopamine boost doing the habit again instant crash doing it again and you're on this goddamn sickening roller coaster vomiting afterwards and babe when you're vomiting into the trash can with people's half-eaten cotton candy and alcoholic beverages on a hot 95 degree humid day at a children's theme park you gotta have that coming to god moment of all right let's stop let's stop and do you want me to give you the answer on how to stop you do the exact opposite fucking thing and that's like yeah bitch not doing it equals stopping no duh but that's the only way out of it it really is are you gonna have withdrawals

yes absolutely you're basically chemically addicted to doing the action no wonder you're gonna have withdrawals but if you can power through that supplement with other like little dopamine boosts that are actually positive and just take that fucking space you will forget all about that bad habit and being on the other side of a bad habit will have you staying far away you just got to get to the other side seriously i've had so many fucking bad habits dating bad men where when you're in the thick of it and you're like but mama i love him it's like okay yeah girl sure and then you eventually leave and you eventually get like three months out of it and you look back and you go why the fuck did i ever fucking do that and then you stay far away because

you realize holy shit i made it out and i'm not going back we're not going back there vaping all right when i was in the thick of it when i had a vape surgically glued to my hand in my mouth as if it was a human centipede movie it was hard to quit it was hard to quit i always wanted to just suck that fucking thing down once i stopped once i took a break stepped away went through the fucking withdraws supplemented with something a little more positive to get that cheap dopamine boost without negatively impacting myself now that i'm out of it and have been out of vaping for let's see probably like five years now oh my god i will never go back i can't even think about it without getting like nauseous let's go a different direction molly okay me and molly who she was my

best friend for a long time we had a tumultuous relationship love very tumultuous when i was in the thick of it physically addicted not only chemically but physically it was hard to get out of it was something i look forward to every weekend every day practically once i got out of it once i took the space once i had the withdrawals now i'm sitting here and i go damn that was that was fun it was fun i mean it was a good time it literally is a fucking good time that's the whole point of it but also the bad times hit quickly after now that i'm out of it i know deep down i'm like i can't go back to where i was because it wasn't good and i took the time and the effort to get out of it so why would i allow myself to regress in that sort of way it can get tricky of

course regression happens we have slip-ups we do the damn thing I understand we're human it's no one is ever fucking perfect that's why forgiveness patience understanding is so important important in this process but I do think also I'm going through the same kind of process that I did with bad habits boys drugs everything with my phone as well and processing that and understanding like damn the phone is as addicting as fucking popping molly was that scares me that scares me a lot and taking i literally only took a week away a week away where i was just inherently not wanting to open it and i was supplementing with other easier dopamine boosts such as other easier apps such as pinterest instagram whatever where i couldn't scroll to the capacity that i would on

tiktok and also i didn't leave those apps feeling like i was being hunted for sport when i did finally come back i did have that coming to god moment where i was like damn this thing actually gives me no positive outlet and no positive feelings and thus it is kind of like a self sabotage route and i gotta take more time away more time away also simply getting off my phone and getting into my hobbies has me reaching for my phone less not only did it deter me from getting on my off my phone and if you need to set harsh boundaries such as like deleting fucking everything off your phone and just having i don't know text and call and that's it do what you gotta do do whatever the fuck you need to do if you need to only get on on your ipad or on your computer where

it's limited valid real honest raw and this is coming from a girl who literally works on social media i get it we all gotta be at least human we cannot be cyborg we weren't born that way babe but forcing myself off my phone also made me bored and also made me dive more into my creative hobbies. It got me out horseback riding every single fucking day. I started doing paintings every single day. I don't remember the last time I have done a painting two days in a row. I started creatively getting enthralled in my life again. I started picking up hobbies that I haven't picked up in years. I started paying attention to my house more, to myself, to my body, to the world around me more. I started getting outside more, getting more interested in the world around me.

And I knew that's when I was doing something right. And I also knew at that moment, damn, it really is the phone. Damn, it really is the phone. Anyways, moral of the story is if you want to have a good summer, if you want to have the busiest, most enthralling, doing it tired, but living life to the fullest summer ever, get off the phone. Get off the phone. Put some rules in place.

Get some boundaries involved, babe. Go through the withdrawal process. I promise it's worth it. if you need a little instant dopamine boost look to more positive outlets all right supplement a little bit i get it i get it i'm not a cold turkey kind of girl but i guarantee you give yourself a week a week a simple week and you go back and you get on that app you're gonna be like damn why the fuck was i so invested in this and also you will go damn my life is actually way more interesting the phone could ever be way more interesting and as somebody who shares their

life online i need my fucking life to be interesting i need to be involved in my life so then i can share it with you guys but yeah that's kind of what i came to this week and also like i said i i realized like damn this was taking up so much of my fucking time and i missed doing all the things i love and also like yeah am i exhausted after the at the end of the day after doing everything I love definitely but my soul is fulfilled I'm off my phone I'm in my life I feel like I'm living life time is slowing down in a very positive way and it all came from one simple change so thank you TikTok for banning me for a week you did change my life will I be going back to that app uh maybe probably but not nearly as much as I was and if you have any sort of

realization about a bad habit you can break it you need to be stronger than your brain than your impulses and if you have that realization that means you have the wherewithal to have self-control as well and i believe in you i believe in your self-control and i believe you want good things for yourself so always seek out the better things for you you deserve it make it happen babe but yeah like i said i've been getting into my creative outlets recently and actually someone asked any sketchbook slash painting exercises you recommend and this is one that I've been doing I kind of just came up with it on my own I feel like it was a good practice as somebody who didn't have a ton of time and also I had just finished a larger painting so I wanted to work on some smaller

things more like technique stuff and color theory and all that I've been doing daily paintings but they have to be under 30 minutes so I mean I'll do the under painting which is just like mapping it out you know drawing the outline and then i'll do the actual painting i did one of my horse in 15 minutes and then i did one of my cat in 20 minutes and i've been posting them pretty much every single day that i make one on instagram so if you want to see them follow me on instagram at hannah murray but it has been such a good practice to a relinquish control b just get creative i don't care about the outcome i'm just trying to do it in a time constraint which means i need to get a little bit more flowy a little bit more flexible i need to set myself up for

success better i need to think about the components of the painting better so that i'm able to actually complete it because i feel like when i do a larger painting and i allow myself to do it over multiple days or i allow myself to do projects over multiple days i start overthinking everything which is not good overthinking is not good for you for a creative person at all overthinking will create kill your creativity but being in that flow state of just allowing yourself to be and to do and to kind of just like fuck around a little bit and find out you will always have the best outcomes and so setting myself up in that sort of way time constraint do it quickly get it done the outcome does not fucking matter just try and do it to the best of your ability

in this time constraint it really has taught me to kind of just chill out and have fun because that's the whole purpose you know what I mean as I keep practicing this as I keep doing it daily as I try different things landscapes clouds humans portraits animals whatever it is I'll learn as I go but I need to do it in order to learn and in order to become better at what I'm doing so that has been such a fun practice and if you're a creative individual and you feel like you haven't been doing as much or you're like too stuck in your head or you're setting too many rules for yourself do just one sketchbook page a day or one painting a day these are small paintings these aren't large massive paintings and give yourself a time constraint of under 30 minutes and see what

you can do whether it's a still life in 30 minutes a quick outline in 30 minutes maybe just like some random abstract art in 30 minutes whatever it is do it do it quick and have fun doing it i think it'll really rewire your brain to realize damn actually this is fun and also the more I create the better because I do have a way of holding myself back and thinking no this outcome needs to be the best thing possible but if I want that outcome if I really want the best thing possible to happen I have to get into the routine of just practicing and painting and doing it over and over and over again and learning my style learning what I feel called to do and that only comes from repetition but yeah I've been having a lot of fun getting back into my freaking hobbies damn

can't believe I forgot to paint for like four years even though it is the one thing that gives me the will to live damn bitch that phone really got in the way of you and your goals that much yeah head scratch monkey covering eyes emoji it really did it really did and I'm tired of letting it get to me life is meant to be lived life's meant to be explored I was talking to my dad we were driving out to um out to go see my horse and he's like do you know what we fucking did for fun when i was a kid my he's like my best friend bought like a one-seater plane and at like 13 years old bought a one-seater little like like teeny tiny little prop plane with basically a fan on the back it was nothing for like 200 bucks and they learned to fly they taught themselves how

to fly like huh that's what they did they were so goddamn bored they were like i'm gonna learn how to fly today when it thought when does that thought ever cross your mind when does that thought ever cross any young person's mind never ever or very less frequently because we're so distracted by things going on in our lives things on the phone easily distractible thing and i think there is a power in boredom and boredom where it drives you into avenues that i mean sometimes can be not positive so please be aware but mostly drives you into avenues that you naturally feel called to do boredom can be a fantastic teacher i remember growing up my parents would be like or i would be like i'm bored i don't know what to do with my time i'm so bored and my parents would be like

not bored enough because if you were bored enough you'd find something to fucking do and when i was younger that would piss me off so bad but they were so right they were so right i would hit that period of like I'm bored I don't know what to do and then I would stay bored for just a second longer and I'd be like actually I'm gonna go play with rocks actually I'm gonna go pick up my paintbrush actually I'm gonna go I don't know spin in circles in the sunshine either way it will lead you in a direction of doing things that you naturally intuitively feel called to do and to explore so get rid of those bad habits that are distracting you get a little bored get in tune with your intuition follow your heart and get creative in whatever avenue you feel

inspired to get creative by even if it is buying a plane and learning how to fly i don't give a fuck but get outside live your life stop waiting around for your life to live you you gotta go out there and find your life for yourself two in five canadians will hear the words you have cancer That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca.

This episode is brought to you by Accenture. When your advertising operations fall out of sync, everything else follows. Spotify and Accenture are working together to reinvent the rhythm of ad sales, using automation, analytics, and smarter workflows to simplify campaign delivery and access better data across the business. The result? Less time spent on operations, more time connecting brands with the moments and fandoms that matter most. Learn more at Accenture.com slash Spotify. hi hannah i hope you had a wonderful morning with your girl xena i'm on my way right now to see my horse my baby boy um anyways i've been listening since the beginning but this is my first time

sending anything and i just feel um a little bit unstable and confused and lost and i'm trying to keep taking my psychiatric meds but i don't know um i'm about to graduate college next month and about to turn 22 and about to go back home and live with my parents and i just don't really know what is next uh for me and uh nor do i really feel like compelled in any direction I'm just so fucking tired um so I just want a little hope um thanks love ya I'm sorry I hate to laugh but it's like me as fuck when I'm having a mental breakdown and I'm like can I get a dose of hope please like I'm begging oh girl I love you number one stay on those psychiatric meds begging you number two you're almost there you are almost there this burnout is very real

especially when you're on like the last mile of the marathon it's very easy to forget about all the miles you've ran of college of making it this far in life because you're about to complete something large where it feels kind of like diminished in that sort of sense so please remember how far you've come and the journey of it all and the hard work of it all i'm sure you're feeling the hard work of it all but it will all be so worth it once you graduate and you're able to kind of like take a beat take a pause I know it feels very unnerving because you're entering a new era a new era where you're actually kind of in charge of figuring it out but I'm gonna tell you something that I think will settle a lot of your nerves are you ready and this goes for

all new grads for anybody who is entering a new era of life for anybody who's entering just like adulthood whatever it may be okay you will figure it out okay you will figure it out this is kind of the 22 curse where you graduate or you're just kind of aimlessly wandering and you're like what the fuck is going on what am i gonna do i've completed something now there's like this newness but also like same old same old and it's not comforting and i don't know what's gonna happen and I don't know where I'm gonna go you're gonna figure it out you will figure it out that's the part of like being an adult that nobody tells you about which is like you no matter what you'll find what you need to do and you will go do it it's like when you take a baby this is and don't apply

this but like have you seen those videos where they're teaching babies how to swim and they just like throw them in the water and it's like no they'll float to the top it's like what what are you talking about what do you mean they're just gonna float to the top they'll figure it out they'll figure out a float on their backs and breathe that's not how it works teaching how children how to swim but like you know those videos where it's like what the fuck are they doing but it really is just how it works that's how it is in life too you will float you will come to the surface for air you will learn how to swim you will get there you just have to be patient with yourself and kind to yourself in the process and have this innate belief and ability

that like you'll figure it out I'm also in the same position you are am I graduating college do I have these big celebrations coming up but I am in this place of later adulthood or not adulthood later 20s where you've kind of been doing the same thing you figure it out you are an actual active participant in life and adulting so you have this next level that you graduate to where you're able to kind of switch it up a little bit if you want and do I know exactly how I'm gonna do it do I know exactly where I'm gonna go do I know exactly how it's gonna figure out no okay I literally have no fucking clue but there is this strong peace in knowing bitch I'll figure it out and I'll be successful like literally it will happen and you have to

have that kind of like completely delusional trust in yourself in order to be successful and also with time you'll realize that there is this innate truth to living which is you'll figure it out if you want to figure it out and that just comes with you know the more years you go through and you're still young you're still young you're still a little baby and i love that for you and you just need more time and experience under your belt to kind of actually trust in this belief but if i can tell you any truth coming from somebody who's about to turn 27 is you'll figure it out OK, is living with your parents going to be a little bit hard and a little bit difficult? Absolutely.

But is it the push from the nest you'll need to fucking figure it out? Absolutely. Is stumbling a little bit post-graduation, you know, and being a little confused on where you're going to go help you figure it out? Yes, absolutely. Don't worry. OK, right now you need to be celebrating, celebrating the end of your marathon, celebrating your graduation.

Whatever comes will come. You'll figure it out. take a little breather a little rest after graduation to just kind of collect your thoughts and collect your feelings and just like take a deep breath and then get back on the horse literally and please give your horse a pet for me how cute but I think the dose of hope you need is not me telling you the answers that you need to know but instead telling you that no matter what you will figure out what needs to be done i promise you that i know you have that innate self-trust i know you have that drive and i believe in you you just need to believe in yourself

and bitch take a breather for real like you deserve if you're graduating this year like you deserve just like a week at them like please at the very least a week of rest tell your parents that like please don't bother me i just graduated college please just let me bed rot for seven days if I need to but like take a breather and get back on that horse you got this I believe in you I guess speaking of creative passions and endeavors someone said hey do you think art school is worth it you know what I'm going to give you the advice that every single person in your life is telling you the exact opposite of which is absolutely absolutely it is one million percent worth it one million gajillion bajillion percent worth it actually i believe that about all higher education

okay i think education is a gift i think education is a privilege i did not realize that until i got out of education and then i was like goddamn i miss learning and learning is important and being around scholars is important and being around people who are interested in having conversation is important being around people who are interested in teaching you is important being around situations that allow you to explore your interest is important being challenged is important and you don't really get that a lot once you become a quote-unquote adult and you're in the real world so if you have the opportunity to explore it take full advantage of it I don't care what avenue it is I don't care if it's art school I don't care if it's plane school I don't care if

it's horse school i don't care if it's medical school whatever it is i truly believe it is so incredibly important everybody will say this oh but the debt but the debt what's the outcome and what's the debt bitch fuck the debt i'm gonna tell you something right now this is not financial advice but let me tell you something right now if you follow your passions whether it be art school i don't give a fuck if you follow your passions and you make a relatively good choice to go to a school that is going to teach you about your passions or give you a good avenue to follow to discover your passions has options for you you will come out of there yeah maybe in a little bit of debt but ultimately the biggest payoff will be finding where you're supposed to be who you

are supposed to be and a job avenue job field that feels fulfilling and worth it and from that you'll be able to pay off your fucking debt so don't even stress about it art school even though i didn't finish it the years that i were there gave me so many opportunities and so many blessings in many different ways challenged me in a way that i had never been challenged as an artist before put me around like-minded individuals that inspired me even nursing school fucking hated it but it taught me about grit it taught me about hard work it taught me about work ethic it taught me about bitch if you're gonna be here you better be here that was something that I absolutely needed and I don't think I would have been taught that in the real world at all higher education is so

important like I said it's a privilege it really is I understand that not everybody has the option and opportunity to receive it and if that's something you want to go after or have the opportunity to go after or god forbid your parents are gonna pay for it go after it one million million percent I think it is so important my biggest regret is probably not finishing college does that mean I never will no who knows maybe I will go back and do it I don't know what the cards have in store for me I don't give a fuck if I graduate at 50 it doesn't matter to me timelines are time isn't real babe you know but I hate when people fill young people's minds with doubt because it teaches them to not trust themselves and I think the most important

thing you can have in yourself is trust in your ideas trust in your beliefs and trust in your intuition and when people like your parents who are unfortunately supposed to give you a little bit of doubt and ask you the hard questions of like are you sure is it worth it is it gonna pay off when they only express their doubt it makes us insecure as individuals and makes us honestly weaker as individuals that's something i've really been trying to like uncondition in my brain getting this horse my dad was like this is a horrible idea this is a horrible investment blah blah blah blah and I literally had to look him in the eyes and go you worrying and placing doubt on me is manifesting bad things like I literally said that to his face I was like I

need you to be a positive individual in my life and something clicked in his head where he's like oh yeah you know she's probably thinking these things so I don't need to reiterate them so like let me be that positive person in your life that's like it is so worth it of course a good school is important make sure you have options at your school if you want to go down a different route make sure the school makes sense for you and your personality I went to catholic school bitch that didn't work out it didn't make sense for my personality in fact it clashed drastically with my personality set yourself up for success in that sort of way and everything will work out I truly do believe it. I do. I don't know anybody at my art school that graduated and is not

successful in whatever avenue they pursued. I don't know anybody at my nursing school who graduated and is not successful at what they do. You kind of hit that weird place after graduation where you're like, oh, wow, you know, I have my I have my job after graduation, but now I kind of want to grow more. But that's something to figure out down the road. I think college is so important for young individuals to find themselves find their inspiration find their intuition find their self-trust in a safe and calculated way and yes it costs money but bitch everything fucking costs money okay it really does get those scholarships work hard write a fantastic fucking admissions letter bitch get on your hands and knees and beg if you have to i've done that to my admissions

counselor before yes i have i have gotten my on my hands and knees and begged in front of my financial advisor for money and they gave it to me hello asking you shall receive but if it's something you want to go after and you feel called to do so the last person who's going to tell you to not do it is me especially regarding college now those of you who are graduating this semester congratulations you made it exciting i'm sure you're feeling probably the exact opposite of everything i did say because ooh grueling hard work yes but so worth it so incredibly worth it congratulations to all my grads out there bitch you fucking did that celebrate uplift yourself get a little crazy with it and welcome to the new era of your life you are in for so many blessings

someone said it's summer but i'm already dreading dreading winter help well good news it is not almost summer well it is almost summer it's not summer yet we're still technically in spring so you have time babe and every summer slash spring anytime the weather gets good i'm reminded oh yeah life is worth living and also if i don't live my life right now winter is gonna be really fucking bad this past winter i actually had a great winter do you know why i was going hard all summer long I was going hard I was going on trips random road trips I was driving an hour away going swimming in the lake I was going on hikes I was I was just out and about living my best life there was no roadblocks in front of me other than work hello but I really did just try and make the most of

any sort of free time that I had hanging out with people bus club train another club like I was just fucking out and about and then I took winter to chill and I did not have such a bad winter I did not have any sort of like you know intense seasonal depression because it was the natural phase of life to kind of relax lay back do some TLC do that inner workings and then emerge like a phoenix again in the spring so if you had like really bad winter blues or if you are afraid of the winter blues or just afraid of winter again in general which I always am bitch I always am the best thing you can do for that fear is live your life to the fullest in the spring and summer live it to the max bitch okay and like when i talk about living and living life it doesn't have to

look like vacationing in greece and then hitting spain and then we're taking a flight to japan and then we're going here like yeah no it doesn't have to be that it can be that congratulations if it is hello um but actually it can be something so simple as just like i'm gonna go on a walk this morning instead of sitting on my phone wow i got in the sunshine i feel enthralled with life again i'm gonna go try a new coffee shop i'm gonna pick up a new hobby i'm gonna get back into painting i'm gonna go do plain air painting bitch outside painting a landscape i'm gonna go sit on a park swing i'm gonna go on a hike i'm gonna go explore my city in a way i've never explored it before i'm gonna go out after work with my co-workers to the club like it can look like

anything you feel called to do but please for the love of god go do it we only get one life and the last thing i'm gonna do is not live it bitch whoo that's something i've been realizing more now so than ever it's like i need to be an active participant in my life because we only got a set amount of time babe i'm gonna turn 27 hello i'm not scared i'm actually very excited but that's a big realization that i'm having as my birthday approaches which is like time flies i'm about to turn 27 wow i need to live live because i'm gonna blink and i'm gonna be 87 so i better get out there and experience as much as possible someone asked going through a breakup oh i'm so sorry is a host phase worth it i'm having fun but i'm afraid of consequences have i ever regretted

my hoe phase yes uh but in the grand scheme of things has have i really ever regretted it no no i think self-exploration is so important but also there's like a safe way to have a hoe phase where it's like very low stakes there's a high stakes hoe phase that you can go through which is like this pussy's open anybody approach like that's high stakes okay please let's not do that i've been there i've been there let's not do that let's not do that that is in fact self-harm okay it's okay to have some boundaries and some rules for yourself my friend will go through hoe phases and her hoe phase is simply only flirting with guys and refusing to allow them to touch or kiss her or even be around her she'll just go flirt them up all night get free drinks and then be like

bye and then never talk to them ever again like your hoe phases i think are so important for women to just like explore their sexuality and to explore what they like and to have a fun flirt and to get silly with it and realize like this shit ain't so serious that's what i think is so positive about hoe phases there's definitely a dangerous way to have it where it's like just allowing anybody access to you or putting yourself in situations that aren't safe or whatever it may be you know what i mean but no i think hoe phases are so important i think are so incredibly important and dare i make the argument that you will find your husband after your hoe face you really will but you kind of got to go through it to get through it but like i said

it can look like anything okay it literally look like you flirting with men all night and then never ever letting them touch you ever like it can look like anything you want it can look like you sleeping with a hundred thousand people i truly don't care as long as you are safe you are having fun you are protected mentally physically spiritually and you're exploring your interests okay i think people get too taboo about sex we have we were having this weird swing about sex and i've always had the same standpoint about sex which is just like live life have fun be safe but i feel like in like the 2016s people got real sex positive in a good way you know being aware being you know just like free to be themselves exploration love it absolutely and

then it got like really pushed where like everything became about sex oddly enough you know like everybody was sex brained and then it kind of it's always a pendulum for everything and the pendulum has swung the fuck back and now it's like everybody's super conservative about sex again and no one wants to talk about it and everybody has like all these weird rules and is applying their weird rules onto other people when other people have weird rules from themselves and oh my god it's like truly sit this if you want to have good sex and if you want to have a hoe face this is what you do sit down get out a pen and paper and you ask yourself how do i feel loved how do i want to feel loved what do i feel most protected by what qualities do i require from a lover aka like

respect patience kindness being fucking attractive a six-inch wiener just kidding i'm joking but like just get aware with what you want and then go after it of course please be on birth control i will always be pro birth control i understand what works for some may not work for you but birth control is so important if you have a choice in this life please make that choice accordingly before they rip it out of our fucking hands like please the way abortion is not legal in Missouri and I have to cross state lines if I needed one it's like thank god I don't have to think about that because I'm on birth control okay get tested bitch if you want to make sure you have a good partner scare them a little bit ask them when the last when's the last time you've been tested

see the reaction on their face that's a fun game to play but seriously just like have fun with it go out for a little flirt and if something flourishes from that cool love it put yourself out there see what sticks see what doesn't explore your body explore yourself explore your interests find good partners vet them a little bit be safe and have fun okay but yes i do think ho phase equals husband and i say that also ho phase equals wife or partner of choice because you'll go through that self-exploration phase find out what you really really really want hone in on it and then once you know that about yourself it'll be very easy to realize oh damn actually this person is a great fit okay everybody i know that has married now all right that has like children that has a

successful relationship long term found that person post ho phase okay but please stay safe have fun keeping things spicy in a long-term relationship honestly the key to that is really just spontaneity i think there's something very positive and uplifting about being spontaneous especially in long-term relationships because things just get mundane you're used to the same four positions you're used to the same four days that you have sex in the same four hours you've always had sex that can get boring i feel you on that don't worry like it's just it's natural and also like boring doesn't equal bad it actually just means safe you're used to it so the best way to keep things spicy is to switch it up get spontaneous with it all right you you never have

morning sex fuck it have morning sex me this morning we'll get into girl talk yeah whatever my boyfriend was out of town this weekend and i was working all weekend anyways so sex drive not really there bitch I'm busy I'm busy and woke up this morning we were both awake he's literally walking out the door and I was like actually take your pants off you have you got two minutes before you got to be at work let's get to going and yeah two minutes it was but it's like fuck it spontaneous get it done like whatever you feel called to do and it's crazy and it's out of the norm do it all right you guys only have morning sex and it's the afternoon you both have the afternoon off and you're sitting around the house and you're like damn i'm bored fuck it let's go

fuck for like 15 minutes to an hour however long you want oh you never wear lingerie in the bedroom and you want to feel a little like sexy you want to surprise your man go put on a cute pair of lingerie oh you want to surprise your man after work greet him out the door with no clothes on oh you guys never send any fun hot sexy photos send a random tit pic like in the middle of the it it's the spontaneity that keeps people on their toes and keeps life exciting and that goes for everything also just like romantic gestures you're used to eating flowers all the time okay flowers get boring just kidding what girl ever gets bored of flowers literally ever but like romantic gestures are fun because they're so random and like not really something you were expecting and

i think that also applies to the bedroom you know you never put a finger in it put a finger in it I'm joking. But like spontaneity is the key to keeping things spicy. So try something new. Hannah. Two in five Canadians will hear the words, you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk.

Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. Guessing is for game shows, not your business. Workday is the enterprise AI platform for HR, finance, and IT, with AI grounded in your context

to get work done and done right. It's a new Workday. I wanted to call in and say thank you for all the spring inspo. I'm listening to some of your earlier spring episodes and it's getting me in the mood to clean declutter I'm moving to a new apartment in a few months hopefully a new house and I'm just working on getting rid of shit that I don't need I feel like I've accumulated stuff over the years and I've never gotten rid of it because the quality of things has gone down over the years and I just

feel like a weird attachment to things that I haven't worn in years I literally have stuff from middle school high school and I'm almost 26 now so it's time to let go but I'm having a lot of trouble deciding what's worth keeping like if do I just get rid of stuff that I've literally never touched in years or could I be creative with it and find a new way to style it how do you go about spring cleaning and do you have any advice on like a set number of pieces you should have like 10 tops two saving pieces like that sort of thing to keep things kind of organized I feel like I'm in an endless cycle of laundry and it's really impacting my mental health because everything is such a mess so I want to declutter and start fresh but I also love clothes so it's been

difficult um I also wanted to say thank you so much because I feel like I can reflect back on when I first started listening to the pod and the person I've grown into person we've kind of grown into over the years I don't want to say together but kind of um I feel like I see a lot of similarities um of myself in you and that's really helped me as you kind of talk through the struggles you've gone through and how you've gotten through them it's helped me in a lot of tough times and I feel like I've become myself really over the years and that's in part to you so thank you so much happy spring love you bye god love you the way i'm almost like brought to tears by the end of that we have grown we have

grown so much together no literally thinking about who i was at the beginning of this podcast record scratch thank god i'm not her anymore sending all the love to her but bitch we needed to grow we needed to grow we need to change and thus is life okay let me tell you we talked about this actually on the patreon pod so patreon girly sorry but i have to share the wisdom to the main episode girly um we talked about just like moving and how to move or what to pack and i think with moving i kind of apply the same idea to decluttering my house um which is the toy story method no one's talked about this before and i am gonna coin the term so if you hear anybody fucking else talk about this because a lot of people take from this podcast and i'm not complaining okay she's an

influencer but no literally you have to use the toy story method because i too have an emotional attachment to inanimate objects all right pixar has gotten to my brain and i do have an emotional attachment to inanimate objects why do i have a half used candle from high school what the fuck is that about why do i have a t-shirt that doesn't fucking fit me what is that about here's the thing you have to think about it the same way you would think about toy story whether it's clothes whether it's half-used candles whether it's dishes whatever it may be think about how sad woody was when they were just in that toy chest not being used while andy was off at college think about how sad and bored they were okay now think about the life they deserve which is one of living and

loving and playing and frolicking if you can't give that item that life it needs to either a get donated b get sold or c go in the trash because it's not supposed to be around period point blank you've got to use the toy story method okay this has helped me massively purge my closet and i am currently massively purging my closet because i had this realization where i was like i love these clothes and sure i have an emotional attachment from wearing that corset to one concert one time but also i'm not giving it the life it deserves and i know someone else can give it the life it deserves so i have to do so i have to put it in the hands of the person who needs it which means selling off half my closet on depop depop.com smoke says shoddy with

two y's if you want to shop my closet um and also donating it if i think oh you know it's not worth selling on depop donating it to someone who can give it a good life who will buy it from the thrift store i love donating i do i love taking massive trash bags of clothes to the donation center and getting it out of my life and into somebody's life who will appreciate it and then if also you're like this half used candle i can't even donate it then burn it and throw it in the trash use it right then and there but if you're not going to use that item within the next month it don't need to be around and that's how i purge and declutter my life the toy story method coining it trademarking it but it works it does work especially as an empathetic and emotionally

attached individual i think about the quality of life all right this is a camo shirt am i gonna wear it am i gonna give it a good life yes absolutely do i have other tank tops that i don't wear that i just have weird emotional attachments to where i'm like maybe in two years i'll wear it yes but that thing needs to go to a loving home who's gonna wear it every single day the same way i have worn this camo tank top for the past four days you know if it's not serving you and you're not serving it then it's got to go to a kind and loving home think of it as re-homing you know literally and that's helped me really really declutter my life so maybe it'll also change yours but i love you and thank you for the kind words it really does mean the world to me

growing up can be so lonely and i'm just so glad we're we have each other feelings on botox i'm 29 and i'm feeling pressure to start i love being a woman head shake emoji yeah no for real i don't know i personally haven't had any work done but does that mean i've never thought about it no absolutely not i think about it daily and i wish that evil little worm did not live in my head and i didn't know about it because if i didn't know about it i would never think about it ever ever i would never have those insecurities if it wasn't something that was placed on me i personally don't have any big like wide large ideas about botox or plastic surgery or all these things because i think whatever you want to do with your body is valid and bitch if you want to inject

things into your face i truly don't don't care like the clavicular of it all the only reason he pisses me off is because he pushes it heavily onto other people but if he was just doing these things to himself and people were watching it's like i don't care what i don't care what you do to your body okay please be safe but like truly we we should have choice in this life to do whatever the fuck we want but that doesn't mean you should put your ideas onto other people or pressure other people to ever do any of those things i personally have never done anything because bitch it's expensive like thank god i don't have the money because i could look i might look a little different that's for sure like i would have triple d's nose job botox to the gods lips large like

thank god i don't have the money for that shit or else i probably would have invested in it that's really the only thing holding me back but no i'm not gonna judge people for doing whatever you want to your face or to your body or to yourself you know we are these customizable characters and there are new things coming about and if that's what you want to do and spend your money on cool fantastic I personally have a shopping addiction not an injectables addiction so that's where all my money goes personally I do think if it's something you're on the fence about then it's probably something you don't need to do it's just that brain worm that's whispering in your ear all the time you know you feel inclined to do it or you feel inclined to change something up about

your appearance maybe try like a new style of outfit or cutting your hair or dyeing your hair or getting a piercing before you go for the like permanent body modifications but also if it's something that you've been thinking about a lot you've been wanting to do you know who am I to tell you no I don't care but is it personally for me eh not really if I do get anything done you'll be the first to know about it but no I just haven't done anything because it's like I would rather take that what 10k for a boob job and put it in my retirement account so I can retire at 50 yes that is a thing I would rather take that 1k I would spend on random injectables throughout the year from my face and put it into my savings account my high yield savings account am i gonna

promote it no absolutely not that's not something i think i can promote i don't want to promote insecurity onto people or the idea that you are not good just as you are i think you are perfect just as you are but also like i said woke bay here i don't really give a fuck what you do i don't i don't i want you to be safe and smart and making your best decisions possible but that can vary person to person on what is right for you but no i don't know like a i think a a syringe because bitch i've looked into a trust a syringe one full syringe of lip filler here in kansas city is like 700 and it's like what could i get for 700 i could definitely get a new or like a used bag i bought my balenciaga bag used for less than that and i fear i'd rather just do a shopping spree

how do you stay fit also love the pod love you honestly can i give you the secret to staying fit moving your body i don't care how you move your body i don't care in what ways you move your body i don't care what what it is moving your body you guys horseback riding has been making me ripped ripped okay abs ass muscles and it's because i've been what moving my body you're like but you're on a horse you're not moving your body yes i am yes i am i'm lifting a 50 pound saddle on off on off i'm picking up her feet i'm picking her feet out i'm brushing her down i'm hosing her down i'm riding for two hours bitch i am getting in the best shape of my life because what i'm just moving my body that's why you see like old women out walking in the morning

it's like that's not high intensity they're not lifting 150 fucking pounds they're simply just moving and i think there's power in movement in whatever movement you are able to do to keeping your body healthy and in shape i don't know with the whole gym culture we're we've been preached to this idea that like you gotta push your body to the fucking max you gotta power out and like if that's what you're into valid queen i would love to watch you deadlift hot sexy is that for me personally no so what has worked for me personally in the whole workout realm is if i'm moving my body i see that as a success and it could be in any sort of way is it running an hour on the treadmill sure sometimes is it going for a walk around the park yes absolutely is it going

to yoga is it pilates sometimes is it just getting out and going horseback riding yeah definitely but it's just the movement of it all that i think is so important to just staying fit keeping your joints lubricated babe i'm sure i probably could push it and should push it just for longevity purposes and keeping my body in shape my muscles and shape my bones in shape so then my body my muscle my bones are strong as I go into adulthood we'll get there eventually but right now since I'm starting from actually doing zero movement being basically sedated for years to now doing some movement and trying to do it at least every day I'm gonna consider that a win I'm gonna consider that a win i'm gonna work on that for now i'm gonna do what i can and then maybe i'll

take it to the next level in the future but i think simply put there's power in movement hey anna first of all love you love the pod i've been listening for girl i don't honestly even know how long it's been so long it's been like at least two maybe three years um but either way um i really do love the pod it's helped me out tremendously like more than you could ever know um i wasn't in therapy for a long time um even though i probably should have been but i am now but that's besides the point um your podcast has really helped me through a lot of stuff um even before i was in therapy but now um i do have a question even pertaining to like when i talk with my therapist and just like other people in general

um I'm a huge oversharer um and I have like this new job opportunity coming up and I'm really scared that I'm going to like kind of like self-sabotage in a way if that makes sense just by oversharing and like getting too close with people that I don't need to be getting too close to if that makes sense like trying to become friends with everybody like I know that like obviously you can't be friends with everyone but um yeah do you have any advice for like you know not oversharing um and if you could just give me some feedback or like pointers on um how i could go about doing that that would be phenomenal love you so much thanks okay this is actually a great question because i too am a massive overshare says the bitch with a podcast microphone in her

hand that's pink and bedazzled like yeah no shit duh duh but i i've realized that what we have here is very special and very cute and very kind and i love this community because it really is just like a community of open-minded thoughtful kind individuals and it's a safe space too for me to overshare okay but the real world ain't like this the real world is not like this and i think for a while i equated oversharing to connectedness and that's because i came from a place where i didn't share anything so I immediately like 360 and started oversharing everything as a way to compensate and it is a great way to compensate but you will realize very quickly like oh maybe I shouldn't have said that or oh maybe this person doesn't have my best interests at hand and so as

a way to mitigate that in my life I really have started just like reflecting on relationships okay this is good because you're starting to do this where you're like okay maybe i can overshare to my therapist because that's what she's here for but maybe i shouldn't overshare at my job interview you're already starting to reflect i get this way about people in my life too where i'm like do they have my best interests at hand and should i tell them this information or is it best to keep to myself or to my best friend or to my therapist you know and so i've started like forcefully thinking before I speak which is something my mom has always begged me to do and I just now I'm starting to implement it but I'm starting to finally think before I speak and mostly just think

about the relationship of the people I'm around you know like okay who are they what is their relationship to me and what in a professional manner professional sense of the word is like conversations that we should be having all right should I tell my mom my deepest darkest secrets and my sexual escapades no absolutely not can I tell my best friend that yes definitely should I tell my employer I'm hungover well where I work sure they don't give a fuck I'm kidding no don't do that can i tell maybe one co-worker i'm hung over yes should i tell that other co-worker i'm hung over no absolutely not you see what i'm saying and i think that will really help you mitigate the oversharing and also i've been doing this thing where it's like what can i overshare

if i do end up slipping up and oversharing what is positive about my life and paints me in a positive life that is actually good to overshare about my hobbies bitch i tell everybody i have a horse like that that's my oversharing my oversharing topic having one topic you can overshare that kind of keeps you on track and also isn't like getting people too deep into your life or whatever is important so mine is like horses maybe you have a weird special niche niche interests about cats and their behaviors or piano or whatever it may be four leaf clovers i'm literally naming random items i don't care but have like one special interest topic that maybe you can overshare about so when you know naturally your co-worker asks you hey what is what are you into

you have something to talk about your therapist asks hey what are you interested in right now you have something to talk about in your job interview when they ask you what what are your passions in life you have something to talk about that isn't oh yeah i got finger blasted last night or oh yeah i got so fucked up two and five canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar raised matters on september 19th join thousands in toronto for the princess margaret cancer foundation walk challenge yourself friends and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca.

This episode is brought to you by Accenture. When your advertising operations fall out of sync, everything else follows. Spotify and Accenture are working together to reinvent the rhythm of ad sales using automation, analytics, and smarter workflows to simplify campaign delivery and access better data across the business the result less time spent on operations more time connecting brands with the moments and fandoms that matter most learn more at accenture.com spotify the other night i got so drunk i fucking threw up in the streets like you can keep that to yourself but then it kind of gives you some rules and boundaries to play by without you know being a mess and also kind of gets you to think about what you're doing what you're talking about who you're talking to

before you start speaking because it's true not everybody has your best interests in mind and also sometimes you don't have your best interests in mind so pausing and taking that time to really navigate before you go deeper is important now if you're drunk and oversharing with people around you who cares like that's one thing if you're high and oversharing at the sesh who cares those are like like very special safe places if you're around friends and you're oversharing it doesn't matter like i said those are very special safe places if you're on this podcast and you're oversharing me it doesn't matter this is a safe space this is a special place but in other places in other areas of the world or maybe it's not so safe or you have to play a role or whatever

that's really helped me do they have my best interest in mind what kind of boundaries should i withhold with these people what should i say and also having that like one special interest topic to overshare about perfect love it the best equilibrium to having conversations and doing them productively how to stop gossiping oh all right i don't know i kind of found myself in this place where i was around new people so when you're around new people or in a new place or in a new environment and you kind of want to just like you have to start like vetting people I think vetting people is so important in your life you need to know what people you mesh with what people you don't mesh with what people you need to keep at an arm's distance one like what

people you can be cordial with but also like I don't really want to let them too deep into my personal life I think it's good to vet people but you don't need to have this holier than thou personality where it's like I am a godlike individual and everybody is below me because that's how you get into the gossiping of it all all right and that's something I had to catch myself on because a lot of my vetting I was just vetting in my head and then I was kind of like am I thinking the right things like does anybody else feel this way so I was asking people about it or not asking but just like kind of getting other people's opinions and then I became almost like too enthralled with the opinions of other people when truly and honestly that don't fucking

matter opinions of other people don't matter and honestly opinions of myself don't matter except for anybody to myself and so i had to catch myself in that moment and be like oop you're becoming a chatty kathy you are getting very close to the gossip edge and it does not matter like it doesn't matter it's a waste of your time it's a waste of your thoughts a waste of your energy and it's not productive at all at all and also it's a bad fucking habit i'm around a lot of gossipers in my life um unintentionally like it's just they're just people who i have to be around for like work or things like that and i see them gossip gossip gossip gossip non-stop and it's because they are unfulfilled unhappy and uncontent with the life that they are living and so to feel content with

who they are they have to put other people down that's their only tool in their life is i have to put other people down in order to feel good about myself and it's just a real bad negative cycle okay there is something to be said about the safety of gossiping which i think is just conversation of hey is this a trustworthy individual hey is this behavior okay hey have they been doing this to you where it's like a check-in that's okay that's real that's healthy that's normal but when you have that conversation again and again and again and again and again that's when it becomes unhealthy unnecessary and completely unproductive all right and it really is just you trying to step on the heads of other people in order to reach a higher level but you will never

feel actually content about yourself that way you will become more of a judgmental person you will start putting other people down for no apparent reason and ultimately you're gonna feel worse at the end of the day because that is only short-term dopamine and when you lay your head down to rest you're gonna go damn actually i fucking hate myself i hate myself you won't say those words out loud but you'll feel it and i know this because i've been in a place where like gossip was the only thing going on in my life and i was the most unfulfilled shell-like individual of a human and i refuse to go back there all right refusal of bad habits once you get free don't go back that now i really do just try and nip it in the bud and when i'm like either thinking these

things or having these conversations with people I do have to like have this internal conversation of like is this is this going to be productive you know this is going to be productive or am I just beating the dead horse again you know and of course I do like my little cheap gossip I love my little just like oh random like being aware of what's going on socially or being aware of whatever but you don't have to push it that's when it becomes very negative and like really kind of like pushes your self-worth down a little bit being aware being in the know it's a need for a gemini like me but being in the know being in the conversation involving yourself unnecessarily continuously putting yourself down continuously putting other people down not good not healthy

real fucking bad okay and like if you're in high school or middle school whatever it's fine drama really is the only thing going on in your life just don't get too involved because it will teach you to hate yourself and hate everybody around you but I think as an adult it is a big red flag quality that I really look out for on people that I just like don't trust so much because you haven't outgrown that high school mentality of having to talk shit about everybody and also it shows me you're uncontent with yourself and it shows me you're untrustworthy because you're if you're talking shit about other people in front of me you're gonna talk shit about my about me behind my back as well if I tell you anything about my life you're gonna take that information turn it

the fuck around and talk mad shit about me behind my back and that's not something I want to be around or be involved with and so I really do try and pay attention to those sorts of behaviors Ultimately at the end of the day It just means you're uncontent with yourself and you're trying to get a cheap hit of dopamine by stepping on top of other people But you'll never get ahead that way and you'll never feel better about yourself at the end of the day It also makes you untrustworthy and just like unbalanced in general It's okay to have those check-ins where it's like did she do this to you? Is this normal? Does she always behave this way? What's going on? It's okay to do that

Some people consider that gossiping listen i gotta be in the know but just don't push it to that other level where it's like the only interesting thing going on in your life is talking shit there's many many more interesting things you can do with your life and please choose them oh but with that being said i love you guys so much this is a fun episode i did sit down and i was like what the fuck am i gonna talk about i am so exhausted but my energy is high now that celsius is kicking i'm gonna go deep clean my house and taking everything shower and I cannot wait there is so much dirt under my nails and in my hair oh but with that being said please get out live your life celebrate your life

it's what we are meant to do if you are graduating soon stay strong please I didn't and it's my biggest regret so please stay strong power through that finish line and take a well-deserved rest breather break for however long you need you deserve it and honestly babe don't stress you'll figure it out just do what you feel called to do and what you feel inspired by everything else will work out but with that being said if you want to see more from me and you want to support me join the patreon patreon.com smoke slash shawty much more many more things coming up soon if you want to see what i'm up to horse girl adventures soon to be birthday adventures running around the redwood forest being in california living my best malibu girl life okay hannah montana life follow me on

instagram at hannah marlene and also submit your questions and call-ins there if you heard call-ins today and you're like how the fuck do i do that dm me dm me or call in if it won't let you just say hey girl i want to submit a call-in i'll figure it out from there don't you worry and if you want to see the vlogs i actually just made like a cook with me vlog i've been getting requests of people like what do you cook for dinner how do you cook it whatever and just getting silly and weird on the internet you can watch that on youtube hannah marlene 444 oh but with that being said stay sane stay sexy and i'll see you all so soon two and five canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar

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