Smoke Sesh - being alone, making mistakes, & individuality (video episode)

Episode Date: January 18, 2024

Hello hotties and happy Thursday! So excited to be back with another video episode for you all and a little extra content, love having these little smoke seshes with you. Today we don't have much to catch up on so we dive right into all your questions such as being alone.. t breaks and how to stay strong during, building a routine to get excited for the future, how to not feel so alone when single, building a individual personality and uplifting individuality during relationships, reading, thrift tips, affirmations for intrusive thoughts, we smoke a little together, seasonal depression and getting that sunlight in plus much much much much more. If you want to see what I'm up to feel free to follow me on instagram @hannahmarlene or join the patreon at patron.com/smokeseshshawty love you all so much and see you next week! MUAH!

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call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sash so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all hello everybody welcome back to another wonderful beautiful episode of the podcast i'm so excited to be back with you guys for another little video episode um i hope you enjoyed tuesday's podcast that was really fun to sit down and chat with you guys i really love just like i don't know i like the routine we have now i really enjoy sitting down on tuesdays and kind of just like doing whatever oh by the way for the audio listeners obviously the visual listeners i'm not in my usual

spot um my usual filming location is like right in front of my fireplace has that beautiful green background the green tile my cheetah print chair that i thrifted from well not thrifted i guess bought from facebook marketplace hunted for on facebook marketplace um but something didn't tell me about living in a old old building i'm talking 100 years old is it is drafty it is cold and as you guys know it has been freezing recently it's been like what negative 14 as a high why is it colder than alaska here i don't know scary anyways i couldn't sit out there because i was freezing i was dying so here i am in bed which honestly i usually am in bed when i'm recording or like tucked up on my couch with a bunch of blankets around me um i thought it'd be a good place to

film i don't know i figured you guys are cozy and comfortable so i should be as well um sorry for the muted yellow asylum mental institution vibes behind me i did not choose this paint color obviously although it is on brand i feel like um i really want to oops i really want to get some um art to hang behind me um because it looks a little scary right now and I'm realizing that a little bit more as I stare at myself but anyways yeah I wanted to keep the regular usual Tuesday episodes um I love hanging out with you guys and just getting everything off my chest and getting it to every single platform that I can and then for the audio listeners right now this is a video episode so I'm sure you guys are watching it either on Spotify or on YouTube I am gonna keep

uploading these on both but I missed when I was young and just like ambitious and as you guys know if you've been listening for forever I started off doing the podcast two times a week for two and a half hours that is insane that's crazy I don't know what kind of energy what manic episode I was going through but I do not have the energy for two two and a half hours episodes but I do have the energy for one hour long episode on Tuesdays per usual and then a little extra bonus video episode on Thursdays it'll also make the exporting easier because I was trying to export that what hour and a half video last Tuesday and my computer was I could hear it screaming like it was like please put me out of my misery anyways I have been doing good I didn't really do a whole

lot yesterday. Not much to catch you up on, which I guess is better for you because that means we're going to dive right into questions. But before we get started, I'm like, should we smoke or have a ginger shot? Let's do this ginger shot together. My boyfriend bought these at the grocery store for us because I was begging him to buy me some last time he was there. And as you guys know, I'm going through dry January pro tip if you are also doing dry january but like your girls are coming over they want to take shots get some of these okay get a little ginger shocks and you can still participate but you're not going to be drinking still feels like you're drinking just as brutal let's be honest cheers to a beautiful episode

it's spicy oh my god the tears in my eyes right now are real that was they are not that intense this one just shot into the back of my fucking throat and attacked me quite frankly um anyways i love reading anybody else hot take i love reading i picked up this book you know new year's resolution let's read a book every month oh my god is that so hard how dare i how dare i have to read a book every month i was like okay we'll start with this one bunny a novel by mona awad picked it up i was like i love reading for the reason that you are like forcing yourself to read a book you're sitting down you're like oh fuck okay let me open the first page first couple pages god let me get through the first chapter

because let's be honest in the beginning of a book not that interesting they're setting you up okay they're setting you up so you have a good time and then you're like forcing yourself to get through this book you're like fuck i'm only in chapter three let me keep going let me keep going and then you're like why did this guy's head just fucking explode at a at like a prom anyways that's why i love reading because now i can't put this fucking book down and i'm not even that far into it i'm maybe like a third of the way into it but this is like my little gummy at the end of the night my little book life is good i understand end we need to take more notes from our grandmas because my favorite hobbies are literally eating

an edible crawling into bed reading my book waking up in the morning making coffee feeding the squirrels who am i i'm 24 if you were listening to this you probably think i'm like 87 no i'm 24 that's just what happens when you burn yourself out so quickly so young partying i'm like is it for the best because now i'm chill when i'm older or did i put myself through hell and back just to be a little traumatized and scared the world i never know i also figured two episodes a week whoa would be fun because a lot of you guys and i see this all the time you guys are like girl girl girl you never answer my questions and it's because i get a thousand of these a week i'm so sorry and i do try and get to everybody's and sometimes i read somebody's

more than others but usually i have no idea i just close my eyes and pick and point and choose so i'm sorry but now that we're doing two episodes i might be able to answer more questions get to more ideas thoughts topics which i love um someone said workout routine I wish I could be like yeah I go to the gym and I power lift every single day and if you were a girl who is doing that shout out to you because that is insane I am so impressed and keep it up and you are a bad bitch and you are a hard worker and that is just some dedication and I am just so proud of you i don't do that i can't do that i wish because my dad does that he goes to the gym for like two and a half hours every single day and he's the healthiest person i know quite

frankly so with that being said shout out to you but my workout routine is i roll out of bed start there get enough caffeine in my system that i get like antsy and i'm like holy fuck i need to move my body or else i'm gonna lose my mind right now and then i just like lay down on my yoga mat and put on a 5 10 15 25 minute pilates video and just try to get through it that's my workout routine but honestly i have really been enjoying it i've been loving it giving myself something to do especially like i feel like with tiktok we've become so enthralled by our phones and just like immediate content all the time that like we get unsatisfied with our real lives pretty quickly and I feel like when you have hobbies to kind of push in that space when you do get kind of bored

very quickly it makes life a little bit more enjoyable instead of picking up your phone and scrolling on TikTok so when I finally the caffeine feels like I need to rip my skin off and itch my bones I'm like crawl on the ground let's do some sit-ups let's do a little video and the YouTube videos i watch specifically are um there's this girl named madeline abid she does some pretty fun easy friendly cute videos and i'm that's what i've been doing but really you can do anything i'll do like a five minute stretch sometimes maybe like a 10 minute little yoga flow doesn't matter i feel like when i just am getting up and moving my body i feel so much better someone said astrology updates I'm feeling so much clearer and happier after a really bad dip I just feel like

it's Capricorn season and everybody's like go go get your shit done go excuses we have had plenty of those I'm over it I have no more excuses get that shit done I'm a Capricorn moon so my internal world is very much so that very much so like girl we're not doing enough which can be a downfall um but it's very much like business woman what are we doing how are we making money how are we bettering ourselves and love that but i feel like when we do enter capricorn season that energy embodies everybody and it's a really nice change of pace especially in conjunction with new years we've set up our goals we've had a good time now we're ready to work hard and really make sure we stepping into our best lives stepping into our best selves and capricorn season is a perfect

time to feel those ways and to get that shit done so shout out to my capricorns out there except for capricorn men i hate you sorry sorry straight men specifically oh someone said any girlies wondering if the patreon is worth it or is worth the payment yes i have so much fun on the patreon i'd be having a blast on there any extra content you want to see from me like vlogs days in life sometimes i'll do like a high and cooking video um and then i'll do like my monday affirmations for you all set the weekly tone i'm trying to do sunday journal prompts more often and just general astrology updates i put a lot on the patreon that's like one of my biggest goals work-wise this year is to really just like if you're paying me

i want to make sure you're getting good good content so come join come hang out with the girlies on there we really do have a good time um i will be filming a little morning wellness vlog slash day in the life vlog tomorrow so if you want to check that out this weekend patreon.com slash smoke slash shoddy i believe question mark oh someone said how to get myself out of a slump and back into a healthy routine so stuck i feel this um i do think it's important to note that when you are feeling like more internal rather than external there's probably a reason for that and you should kind of uplift that feeling in a sense of okay maybe i'm feeling more internal because i need alone time i my social body battery is dead i need to self-care

relax spend some time looking inward because i haven't had enough time to do so so i feel like there is some validity to that feeling um but then you get to a point where it's like okay girl we've been in this bed like a charlie the chocolate factory grandpa for a week now we gotta get out there we gotta return back to the real world and i feel like especially after you spent so much time inside and just alone it's kind of hard to get back out there you feel like you've kind of like missed a little bit in a sense you're unsure it's like breaking a cycle you're like i don't know if i want really want to dive into this because i could stay here and be safe and comfy in my bed with my heated blanket under me shout out to my boyfriend for buying a heated

blanket that is a game changer i am terrified of fires especially in my old building so i was nervous about a heated blanket but it is so nice i feel like a cat laying on a heating vent anyways where was i going with this oh yeah you really just gotta push yourself out of your comfort zone because once you spend so much time internal and you do the self-care thing you're like good done i'm feeling great we have gotten our social battery back up it will feel a little awkward going back outside for the first time but sometimes you just gotta force yourself to do it you know you want to be out there you know you want to go chit chat with the girlies you know you want to go out you know you want to like go get coffee one day you know you want to go put on

an outfit like a cool outfit and go walk around the city okay like the bad bitch you are it's gonna feel a little awkward at first but if you push yourself and do it once again you know what you want you know what you want to experience by putting yourself out there and just getting that shit done you're gonna feel so much better best way to get yourself out of a slump after you've kind of been looking internal a little bit too much and you do want to get a little more external get out I love a concert you're like girl I can't just like go to a random concert yes you can yes you can yes you can I guarantee listen I live in like a tiny ass little town not the smallest I mean it is a city let's be real but there's always a show an event a concert a rave a jazz

playing that I can go to and when I want to get out and experience the world and get myself out of a slump and kind of re-enter the world as a citizen again and enjoy the outside world i want to do it where i feel like there's not a lot of pressure on myself and i don't know why when i'm like sitting down at a restaurant and i'm like forcing myself out of the house in that sort of way or i'm going to a coffee shop i feel like there's like more and this isn't real this is just like me being crazy in my fucking head but i feel like there's like more of a pressure on me than if i'm going to an event where there's like somebody else being viewed being watched um I feel like they're taking on that pressure so then I can exist and have fun whether it's like

I'm going oh I'm going to a jazz club and I'm gonna go watch them play or I'm gonna go to a rave and I'm just gonna put on a cute outfit and go dance my little heart out um or maybe it's I'm just gonna go down to my local bar and see who's playing um I feel like that's the ultimate way at least for myself to get myself out of a slump and kind of like low stakes fun most likely going to work activity personally but i guarantee every friday saturday night there's someone in my city playing um whether it's like a small band or a big one just go to a show also going to random shows is one of my favorite ways to kind of like re-experience the world and discover that there is hope and joy in it especially just like a random concert that i

had no expectations from because most of the time you're going to be blown away and you'll be like wow i never would have expected that that was fantastic can't wait to go do it again so get out there put on a cute outfit put on some fun heels enjoy your life put yourself out there um i understand the fear of rejection is very real but also like if somebody is out there and they do reject you girl fuck them they don't deserve to be around you whatsoever so low stakes if you ask me also having good friends around you can make this easier and that's why i think having a good friends around you is important um because they're gonna want to go out with you they're gonna want to uplift you they're gonna want to be with you and spend time with you and being able to

text a friend and be like hey girl let's go do this random fucking thing and they're like yeah i'm known that's the best feeling in the world quite frankly oh speaking of someone said how to thrive single so bored of waiting for my person hard to not get frustrated when I was single and I was having the hardest time being single I feel like I was also in a place where I didn't have any friends so then I was wanting to fill that void of non-connection with a romantic partner because it seemed like I guess the easiest thing to do you know I was like oh there's a hole in my heart I should obviously fill it with a romantic partner right like that makes sense girl no I would recommend to anybody to fill that

hole in your heart friendship friendship genuine compatibility with another person that doesn't have to be on a romantic level fantastic you're gonna get way more from like a friendship than you are any sort of romantic relationship i guarantee you so i say to thrive single the best way to thrive single is with some good friends by your side because if you start thinking like oh fuck you know i'm not in a relationship is something wrong with me they're gonna be there to snap you out of it and be like girl uh-uh cut that cut that out let's go out let's have some fun let's stay in let's watch a movie let's distract you in that sort of sense but we can't go through this life alone um I used to really close myself off and not make connections because

I thought people were gonna hurt me and like listen you're gonna get hurt no matter what whether it's from yourself or somebody else you might as well put yourself out there and at least try to make true friends and real friends because having those people by your side makes life so much easier but I do see a lot of girls doing the thing where they're like just lonely and they think they need to fill that loneliness with romance and connection no work on making some friends okay there's some girlies out there that think you're cool and hot and want to hang out just ask them okay just ask them and if they like the thing with like adult friendships is and i saw my friend at my work the other day and she put it into words perfectly um she's like we

should hang out sometime you know like we should go get brunch we should do something but also we're adults and if I don't talk to you for a month it's not personal and that is so real because when you're like a child you've so much free time and like asking someone to hang out you can do that the next morning you can do that the next afternoon very quickly but when you're an adult and you have an adult priorities and you have a lot of shit going on in your life it's sometimes harder to get together and the more understanding you are about that the easier it will be to make friends okay if you're texting someone you're like hey let's hang out hey let's hang out and every time they're busy that's okay but maybe just ask them when they're free next and tell

them to hit you up whenever you whenever they're free okay give them the ball give them the opportunity but romantic or like uh friendships as an adult you really have to allow space and growth for those people to or space and time for those people to grow and reach out to you as well as you to reach out to them so make some friends enjoy some time with them watch sex in the city okay that is also a great way to thrive single hi hannah um my name is live i love your podcast i listen to it all the time at the gym like so thankful for you and i found you going into the new year anywho um i was wondering what your best tips are on being like alone with yourself and how to live with yourself and enjoy yourself more i'm having a hard time just like embracing

being with myself so let me know love y'all love you okay so time alone spending time with yourself it's not gonna lie i'm gonna feel a little uncomfortable at first it's like spending time with a new friend that you don't know you don't know if you should trust them you don't know their favorite color you don't know anything about them you're a little uneasy you're a little unsure but then it's like with yourself so it's extra you feel like there's like a little bit of extra distance there um it's okay it's gonna be a little uncomfortable and that's very normal but with time understand things will get easier um for a long time i just didn't want to be me i didn't want to be me i don't know what was going on i a slew of mental illnesses entered

my body at the age of 12 and then they just like took control and I viewed myself as that mentally ill person and I did not want to be me I didn't understand that there was another me outside of that so then when I finally came to from my living nightmare I was like wait a minute that's not me who am I and that was a very uncomfortable thing because I had to go through a lot of change and growth and just like understanding of myself that I had never gone through before um and I made a lot of mistakes I dated a bunch of ugly boys I you know did things that maybe weren't in my character um I felt a little disconnected from myself but I needed to go through those necessary changes and those necessary experiences in order to grow with myself and understand myself a little

bit more um so it's okay if you feel like there's a little bit of a distance keep chasing after what you want and what feels right and in turn you will eventually find yourself but being alone and just being alone with yourself I also understand there's like a little bit of uncomfortability because maybe you do know yourself and you know who you are but also what the fuck do you do when you're alone you know um I used to be like well I feel like especially just going to college and stuff you're constantly surrounded by people you're constantly surrounded by friends um activities events classes whatever it is and that's really great you need that support system especially when you're there but then you exit it and you're like an adult which already is

a little uncomfortable and then you have a lot of alone time that you just have never had before and you're like what do i do what are my hobbies what do i do with all this time um especially like what do i do with myself and my thoughts and here's where i come in because i love spending time alone now you have to discover it you have to try new things girl take up puzzling okay take up knitting put on your favorite tv show um create like a fun bath for yourself indulge in a little self-care you see all those things online where you're like that influencer is doing something really fun alone in her room right now i wish i was doing that girl you can be doing that do you know what i mean you can be like chilling by yourself in a bathtub eating

ramen noodles like if that's what you want to do you can do that you have so much freedom and only yourself and no one else can step in and that is a blessing not a curse okay it's okay to be alone it's i promise all right you need time to rest and relax and recheck in with yourself so then you actually are able to enter the real world as a full developed human being okay you're not putting yourself aside you're not ignoring yourself for the sake of other people you're doing that mental check-in like hey are we okay how are things going any way we can improve you know what i mean that comes all from being alone and just having time with yourself with your thoughts and your hobbies um but yeah like have a little something to do with your hands you're

not constantly always on your phone um and turn on your favorite music turn your favorite tv show whatever it is if you do need a little bit of company in that sort of sense but it's not as scary as you think and getting to understand yourself and spend time with yourself the more you do so and the more you indulge in those behaviors that do truly bring you joy when you're alone the more you're not gonna want to fucking go back out there let me be honest like I feel so content and at peace with myself because I've put in the time and understanding getting to know myself and understand what I like and creating like an internal world for me that I genuinely enjoy because I've never had that um that now I'm like this is perfect I don't need anything else

that's a whole nother can of worms um but it's fun to get to that place it does just take time and having that little bit of like self-isolation moment where you're like I need to discover what the fuck's going on in my brain and who I am and make an identity for myself and that only comes truly through doing that inner work and spending time alone and sitting with those thoughts a little bit longer than you'd like anyways should we smoke ginger shot listen listen I worked out I had my coffee I had my ginger shot it's what 12 o'clock I do work today but listen if your servers and your cooks at your restaurant aren't high as fuck your experience is gonna be just not the best let's be real anyways let's smoke with that in

mind um I thought I would rip a whip rip whip out big daddy here um I've talked about strawberry bong on here before but as you can see massive like 10 pound fucking bong and i never thought i'd see strawberry bong again this is a reincarnation um but i talked about strawberry bong on here before um and how me and my friends in college had like she bought one of these giant ass fucking bongs strawberry bongs from the local gas station which we could also drive through and pick up wraps yeah life was good and um she had to throw it away one year because she was driving back home and like cannot take paraphernalia paraphernalia across state lines let's be real especially a giant fucking bong so she threw it away and we were like rest in peace love her and

then shout out to canna style they sent me one i didn't know they even existed outside of that one that we had from a random fucking gas station in omaha nebraska so with that being said cheers visit bet mgm casino and check out the newest exclusive the price is right fortune pick bet mgm and game sense remind you to play responsibly 19 plus to wager ontario only please play responsibly if you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you please contact connects ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge bet mgm operates pursuant to an operating agreement with i gaming ontario oh my god

um the thing about like bigger bongs or like tall bongs is you have to use your whole lung to suck that smoke in. And it is a mouthful. It's a mouthful guaranteed to fuck you up. Let's be real. Someone said reconnecting with old ex friends. Should I do it or give them a second chance? Um, depends how, like why the ex was the ex. Let's be real. Um, if it was like, oh, we just moved away from each other and stopped talking that's okay you can reconnect let's chat but i also have friends that have like really fucked me over like stabbed me in the back and as soon as i kind of cut that relationship off i knew that um from that moment forward it was just like a no-go um i'm a scorpio venus so as soon as somebody like fucks me over in a serious manner like i

understand petty bullshit and just like being human and making mistakes that's okay i'm not quick to cut off in that sense but if you are like conniving and going behind my back and plotting like a villain against me against somebody who only has pure intentions for you you're weird and you're scary and I don't want you near me ever ever nor would I be the first person to reach out um once again I do understand you know human emotions making mistakes you should always allow you know your friends to make mistakes and to be better people for it and be a better friend for it um but if you're conniving an evil i don't have space for you in my life okay i don't want you around me so depends depends on the level but also i think sometimes it's just

like girl fuck it if you guys had a good time and it was some petty bullshit reach out why not someone said hi hottie how to balance a relationship meanwhile balancing yourself as well um literally this morning I told my boyfriend you got to get out of here I need alone time and he is a sweet angel and he said I hear you and I understand your needs and I'm gonna put on my shoes and go so it really is all about communicating what you need and like if you need time alone communicate that and they should respect you and understand that of course when it's like kind of a new thing I understand having like some sort of insecurity about it like oh do you not like me but like reassure it like no it's not about you i just like want to take a

bubble bath and watch my teen wolf by myself like that's it sorry love you babe but i just need a night alone you really have to understand like things that make you an individual and not um not put yourself aside for the relationship a relationship is something that should make you grow as an individual as well as like a person in a relationship it shouldn't hinder one or the other um it really should flourish and help you grow as a human being i really lucked out with amazing wonderful parents i don't think they ever listened to this podcast and they never should i don't want anybody who was a family member to ever listen to this podcast let's be real i'm on here talking about like we won't get into it but they are the sweetest people ever they've been together

for fucking forever i think they said like 30 years or something was their most recent anniversary um they're both gemini's don't know how that's working if i'm being honest um but they are such individual people but the only reason they are such individual people and succeed as individual people not only in like personal life but their hobbies their activities their work life is because they uplift and show up for each other and listen to each other and support their individuality in that relationship while also harboring and like taking care of a ongoing relationship of course go to that work meeting love you i'll be here when you get home i'll cook dinner for you of course you should go for that thing try it out you would be amazing at it

i'll be here to help if you need help um they go like on weekly date nights to make sure they're not not disrespecting their relationship or not uplifting their relationship and being partners to each other and it is kind of a fine balance between that so also when you're a people pleaser um and i have this problem when you're people pleaser you very easily throw yourself aside which is not okay please stand by yourself and stand strong by yourself i love you um but it's very easy to just throw yourself out the door and then sake or in the name and sake of another person and their comfortability but putting yourself aside will not make you easier to love ever in fact it will make you harder to love because they won't understand the real you they

won't know the real you and they won't get to know the real you um you closing yourself off and ultimately like people pleasing is a self-sabotaging behavior i said it i said it it's a self-sabotaging behavior um you are not being your real true self and in fact you're not giving other people a fair chance to know and get to know the your real true self so as hard as as hard as it is oh my god I got the worst cotton mouth as hard as it is to say no sometimes or maybe even yes sometimes you just got to do it not only for the sake of yourself but for the sake of the other people as well in your life if I made water bottles would you guys love I love my water bottle I'm just like I need it I need it hot pink I need it hot pink not light pink I need

hot pink for some reason let me know in the comments also sorry I didn't understand I have never felt older in my life because I've never made video content or uploaded it or understand that process understood that process at all and relearning something I don't know why it makes me feel old for some reason instead of like young and fresh I was like oh internet hard I feel 80 um anyways where was i going with this oh um i didn't realize i had my youtube comments off so sorry and i love you and i love all the support and i finally turned them on after i figured it out but let me know what you think let me know what you want to see from me questions would love to hear them youtube video ideas would love to hear them such as like vlogs smoke with me whatever

i want to put out extra content like that as well for you on this channel so hi hannah hi everybody um so i'm a college student and i just get really socially anxious often i've been noticing this like probably started around covid maybe even before that but i just like some days like i just get so anxious about like walking into a room like it's so stupid and it's mostly just around people my age um I just get like some days I'm so worried about people like looking at me and like what they must be thinking and some other days I don't care and I know it doesn't matter I know like if they're like a shitty person it doesn't reflect on me like it doesn't make me a shitty person or whatever but I still just get really socially anxious sometimes and like I'm

wearing an outfit that I don't like I'll be anxious the whole day I don't know if you have any advice or any tips on how to like maybe manage this a little bit better i would really appreciate that thank you so it sounds like you're dealing a little bit with a case of intrusive thoughts um you're working through that process in your uh call-in i'm having these feelings they're not based in reality don't know what to do with them you need a mantra when you have these reoccurring intrusive thoughts whether it's about your appearance about yourself like about other people like oh my god they're looking at me they're looking at me I hate the way I look so they're looking at me you need a mantra okay my mantra specifically when I find myself in those

like semi socially anxious situations but really it's just me freaking myself out there's nothing based in reality my go-to mantra is nobody's thinking about you as much as you are currently thinking about yourself no one's thinking that hard about you no one no one you are because you are in this body and you want to escape right now it's making you overly think about it but in reality every time you walk into a room a you need to walk into a room like god sent you there himself personally herself whoa sorry there you walk into a room like god sent you there herself and second of all you gotta have a mantra specifically when it comes to those socially anxious situations every time i walk into a room and i feel that anxiety flare up i literally have

to repeat my head like literally no one's thinking about you right now find peace in that find comfort in that and stop thinking so fucking hard about yourself okay just exist enjoy let's throw some positive affirmations at myself real quick i look hot i look sexy love my shoes i don't know whatever's going on maybe my hair slaying that day let's give a little self-compliment maybe let's throw a little compliment to someone else so we can kind of redirect those thoughts and those behaviors um and then let's move on girl love you someone said tea break advice slash thoughts i think it is so important to challenge yourself in this life and if you ever feel like you are succumbing to something or you are out of control of your life challenge yourself to take

back control it is such a quick and easy way to not only like build strength within yourself and understanding and just like appreciation is just like giving yourself a good little challenge dry January for me I was at a place where also I feel like the way I talk about it it sounds like way more intense than it was I was not like a raging alcoholic I was not drinking in the morning it was just like why every once a month do I go out and have to black out you know and why do I feel the urge to drink after work let's think about that before it gets out of hand and I do start fucking drinking in the morning let's be real um but I felt like I was out of control and I wanted to give myself a reason to take back control and to give myself the trust

understanding that I do actually have willpower and I can't make these choices and decisions in my life so yeah i love a challenge and if you feel like you need a tea break um or you want to challenge yourself to one you want to see what your life is outside of substances girl go for it i guarantee you will feel nothing but better for it um and if you do need an easier way to kind of supplement i understand people like don't feel great when they stop smoking weed or drinking and you need a way to like supplement in any sort of sense try some cbd um i feel like it is a really great way to kind of offset the side effects as you will like if you get nausea or you're not getting hungry anymore because it's not triggering that hunger response um supplement with a little

bit of cbd whether it's just like smoking it or eating it i feel like it will give you the medicinal properties minus those psychoactive effects and will really help you kind of persevere through it cbd to a weed tea break is my thc um liquor not liquor water to a dry january what anyways someone said tips on setting or setting routine making the days not blend into one okay so within my routine within my everyday routine i also have a weekly routine and then i also have a monthly routine whoa too much inception anyways with my weekly routine there's certain things i do on certain days in order to a keep track of the week and feel like i'm actually moving forward with time but be also to have something to look forward to

so like every sunday me and my boyfriend go to the farmer's market and we get our favorite mediterranean spot um let me put you on habashi house in the river market in kansas city it is the best restaurant to ever exist and one of the only places i eat weekly um i don't know why i'd only look forward to food so that and then also i'll do like um i'll make sure the meals i'm eating throughout the week or something that i can look forward to and enjoy on the specific days that I choose every Thursday morning I like to go um thrifting so I can just have a morning to myself and get out and do something that I really enjoy um every what is it like once a month I'll go and do like red light therapy like hot sauna just to kind of chill and relax me and my

friends started that like two months ago and I've been really loving it I think I'm gonna go tomorrow so if you want to watch my vlog patreon.com slash smoke says shawty why do i not know my patreon handle anyways you got to have like routine within routine within routine so set up something you can enjoy set up something you can look forward to throughout the week throughout the month maybe a trip you know set up a trip so you have something to plan and do and look forward to for the future right now I'm starting my starting to plan my 25th birthday trip and I believe we're going out to California which will be very fun I love California I have so much love in my heart for California and I used to talk a lot about moving there and then I was like oh yeah

global warming oh yeah housing prices oh um maybe I'll stay here and by staying here I'll be able to save money and travel more often so that's a goal this year as well i really want to travel more often and just plan ahead plan some good travel spots so then actively throughout the months like especially during these winter months i can be thinking about something in the future and planning and looking forward to it so oh someone asked thrifting tips like what are the best times dates to go and how to not get overwhelmed illy um well i'm very lucky and i only work evenings so i do have a lot of mornings to myself first of all don't thrift on a like saturday saturday morning could be lucrative but only if you get there at 8 a.m when the doors are open sunday you're

shit out of luck monday shit out of luck you gotta give them time to like restock and go through inventory tuesday wednesday thursday friday saturday mornings fantastic tuesday wednesday Thursday Friday evenings amazing um and if you're gonna get there early you better get there early because I'm telling you I pull up there and it's like 8 a.m doors are still locked and there's eight people outside with carts it's insane it's crazy um anyways first thing I always do is I hit I kind of do it the opposite um if they have like a vintage area that's like a little bit more expensive i will go through there first because sometimes i'll find something that's good and it'll like lose a tag or whatever and then i'll get it for cheap or it's they don't know the

worth and it's marked down but they know it's like cool so they put it in that area so i will go through there first and then i will go and hit the shoes okay i'll hit the shoes pro tip if you set a shoe down and you touch it and it wobbles side to side like this it has dry rot it's going to break apart as you're wearing it down the street that has happened to me before i was walking down the street literally leather pieces were crumbling from my fucking boots and then my heel fell off and i felt like the biggest mess in the world anyways if it's sitting down and you touch it and it wobbles that shit has dry rot not going to be good anyways i hit the heels like the purses um accessories and then i always hit the bottoms before i hit the tops it's very

rare that i find a good top at a thrift store i'm talking like a cute graphic tank top i'm talking like a cute blouse um it's pretty rare i feel like i'm more likely to find any sort of like skirts mini skirts dresses that sort of thing that's where i will look first and then last I will also check the tops um and don't forget accessories and don't forget home goods um I love thrifting mugs it's one of my hobbies I have such a fun mug collection um vintage ashtrays planters I have a collection of like these really cute ceramic airbrushed vintage planters I have like little deer and a little kitty cat it's so cute um and then art always look at the art sometimes they'll have like a a bin and it will have rolled up posters and sometimes those rolled

up posters are really cute um i have some fun vintage ones that i have found at the thrift store what else i think that's it um oh and jewelry never skip the jewelry never skip the accessories you're bound to find something cool whether it's a pair of sunglasses a belt buckle um some fun earrings some fun necklaces i love a statement necklace recently and i've been trying to thrift more anyways also you need a coffee beforehand and preferably a little pen in hand you got to get in the right mindset to thrift because when i go thrifting i'm gonna be there four hours who knows if i feel like it's ransacked i will leave immediately i'm like it's not worth my time but if i know it's gonna be a good day and i'm off to a good start i'm gonna be there for a

while okay for a while also don't forget to check the men's sections and sometimes oddly enough like the kids section will have like brandy melville in it and i'm like what vintage dolce gabbana t-shirt what why is this in the kids section because they don't know the difference oh we can do this real quick thanks to combat seasonal depression um i love my red light therapy sauna it's literally i just go to this local yoga studio and i go and i sit my ass in there and i get my red light therapy and i feel like i close my eyes and it's hot as fuck in there and i pretend i'm sitting next to the ocean they have a fucking you can plug your phone in and play music they got speakers in it it's crazy um that really has helped um if you need like a sun lamp of the sorts anything to help

you feel like you are not dying and you are getting enough adequate sunlight i love investing in those guess what a ring light same exact fucking thing um don't buy one of those sad lights that cost 80 they literally are just profiting off your mental illness and calling it beneficial therapy for 80 fucking dollars when you can get a ring light that does the same exact thing for what 20 bucks on amazon so do that um but yeah i love having like little date nights with myself little date experiences with myself um treating myself to like a red light therapy or treating myself to a massage i do a lot of self-care things in the winter i feel like once the trees and the plants go inward it's kind of like my mental sign that i need to go inward and

do some inward work whether it's like therapy journaling treating myself taking baths taking long showers indulging in my self-care um i feel like that's the best way to really combat that seasonal depression because once you do like the physical aspect of taking care of yourself it's kind of easier to start doing the mental aspect of taking care of yourself um because when you feel bad about yourself as a whole it's really hard to do that internal work um so start simple start showing yourself love physically so then it's easier to show yourself love mentally okay um i do feel like i have a whole podcast on seasonal depression so go check that out if you want more in-depth tips but let's get into some collins

oh wait someone said anyways i love you guys so much thank you for being here with me thank you for being amazing and beautiful and wonderful and the perfect human being that you are i cannot wait to hang out with you guys again next week for our usual two episodes now so excited to be doing that if you want any extra content from me you know where to find me at hannah marlene or why was i to say hannah marlene.com maybe one day um at hannah marlene on instagram if you want to see what i'm up to see my outfits see fun things that i'm doing any pod updates will also be there as well um and then patreon.com slash smoke slash shawty or slash hannah marlene one of the two um you can find me there and you can find a bunch of extra fun content and come hang

out with the girls you know what i mean um video episodes will be posted on spotify smoke sesh and youtube i think my youtube handle handle is uh smoke sesh shawty so i love you all i will see you all so very soon have a wonderful amazing beautiful rest of your weekend Thank you.