Smoke Sesh - burning out, divine timing & spring cleaning

Episode Date: March 14, 2023

Happy Tuesday my beautiful Smoke Sesh listeners and boy do I have a fun episode for you all. We start off by sharing the effects of spring and looking forward to the spring equinox ! We also talk spring cleaning and how to excavate unnecessary things both physically and mentally, we also chat burnout and surviving the last bit of college and basic tips for not burning out on life. Second hand clothing! And how I find my closet favorites, jealousy within relationships and how to calm down a crazy bitch, also allowing yourself to thrive as an individual in a relationship, plus my go to sexy time songs. Situationship to relationship? Can it be done? Growing up and finally having freedom while giving into divine timing and choosing what you want to do with your life. Learning to love women and how to open communication in your relationship. Low libido, sensuality and foreplay, raves, indica vs sativa, CBD, loving yourself through it all and quitting nicotine the hard way plus so so so so soooooo much more. This was a really fun episode and I hope you all enjoy this beautiful Tuesday! I’ll see you all next week

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash, so come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life. The good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing, I've got a story for it all. Good morning everybody, oh my goodness, how the hell are we all doing today? we feeling good it's a nice little sunny afternoon where I am not even afternoon bright and early morning I cannot lie I have been up and running around and trying to get

so many errands done this morning I don't know what kind of power lies in the combo of weed plus coffee but i am able to just like superhuman out of body experience completely get so many tasks done and it's kind of insane like i'm sitting here and it's 12 o'clock and i'm like oh my god i just got a passport and then i went here and then i went here and then i had to do this and now i'm finally sitting down again back at my apartment four hours later um but yeah it's been a really good morning little afternoon for me I hope you guys are having a wonderful Tuesday thank you guys for enjoying the last episode a lot of you guys listened to it as well as like not only the people who continuously show up which is so many of you thank you so much but

also a lot of new listeners so if you're a little new listener who has uh seemed to join us on this little journey thank you for joining us thank you for being here and if you are reoccurring little smoke sash girly thank you for showing up again i love you so much i'm so excited to spend my day with you guys um but yeah not much to update you guys on really just been i don't know i i i always write down the equinoxes or like the you know changes in the season on my calendar and we're approaching the spring equinox very quickly which i think we can all really notice like things are warming up we're seeing we're seeing a light at the end of the tunnel you know people are slowly working towards the end of school people are you know the trees are blooming we

can finally get outside a little bit it's amazing i made a tiktok the other day that's like i'm so fucking excited because in less than two months it's going to be 80 degrees and i'm going to be outside half naked and high the entire time and that is literally just how i thrive that is where I should be that's what I should be doing and so many of you guys resonated I was like yes love it I'm glad that we're all feeling this collective energy this collective rise of energy um not only is it a rise of energy but I feel like it's also kind of kicking us into gear to be like all right what do we need to get done how are we moving forward what the fuck do we need to do what do we need to check off our to-do list um and I kind of love that energy with the spring equinox

arriving i think we need to do a little um confessionals episode just so we can enter this new season you know on a on a good path you know without any demons following us behind if you're new to the pod confessionals episodes is basically when all my girlies give me their deepest darkest secrets that they need to get off their chest you know any fun little stories love hearing it from you guys and i also share my own but i'm hoping to do that next week so stay tuned that will be coming up but for now we're just going to answer some questions see what the collective vibe was for the week so let's get into it speaking of the spring equinox and you know pursuing and pushing forward someone asked um tips for spring cleaning out with the

old in with the new love a good spring cleaning love just like clearing out any negative stagnant energy that you need to release especially with physical items if you're like me and shit just like piles up around you and you're like oh my god how the fuck did my life turn into this there's a million empty water bottles on the floor there's like the kroy cans everywhere i have four chairs full of clothing and like dead flowers everywhere like yeah okay we need to pause and really maybe do some evaluation here and let's you know let's tidy this place up um I think spring equinox is a perfect little reminder to be like pause check in how are we doing in life not only mentally but also physically and is there anything we can do to better ourselves um so when it comes to me

I will be purging my closet um just going through clothing that is like do I wear this actually like is this something that i reach for a lot in my closet if not maybe get rid of it maybe sell it on depop you know let's let's find something else to replace it with um or just you know clear it out maybe i have too many fucking clothes none of it i ever wear let's send it to a wonderful owner who is gonna wear it all the time and show it the love it deserves so closet that's a one big goal of mine um also just cleaning up piles and tidying not only am i going to kind of get rid of some things that have just been sitting around and i haven't been utilizing within my life but also we need to do some like deep thorough cleaning okay like we're gonna be dust mopping

and uh lysoling and window cleaning and you know everything that you can possibly do to like spick and span and tidy up you know if you want like a full how to fucking clean your apartment kind of list and how i go through it i put one on my patreon a couple months back it's a good little you know follow through if you need something very specific um but for me personally i really just hit what is most prevalent to me what am i not using what do i need to get rid of what is maybe not bringing the best energy to me and what do I want to bring in those are the big questions when it comes to just spring cleaning and spring tidying and not only does it have to be your physical space um if you're also like me you can repot some plants get some new plants

bring those into your environment I think that's important as well it's also could be a fun little ritual um every spring equinox brings some liveliness into your space um but we also have to do a little mental check-in a little mentee bee check-in like how are we doing are we surviving you know are we are you persevering is there anything that is consistently bringing us down that we have been realizing recently you know between the new year and now it's only been like two and a half months um so really take note of what you've experienced um what you want to experience and what you maybe don't want to experience again and um things that you can maybe bring in and things that you can maybe get rid of within your own little mental space i know

we don't have like complete choices over everything i'm not being like school is toxic drop out of school like you don't need that negative like i get it like working for stuff is going to be hard that doesn't mean you should give up um just because you're facing a little bit of difficulties i feel like persevering through those things really makes you a better person and a more well-rounded person um but if there's like people or situations you keep finding yourself in or maybe you're going to parties and you don't like parties or maybe you are not focusing enough on school really like take note of the behaviors and the people around you and ask yourself like is this what i want to carry over into summer because summer is all about party living it up

having a grand old time let's focus on ourselves let's get all hot and sweaty you know what i mean like it's a fun time so really think about what you want to bring into that oh okay and doubling down on the school situation uh best burnout recovery tips final season plus starting a new job got me fucked up yeah i could imagine for sure most stressful environment i was ever put in was final season in nursing school art school i was chilling because i was within my passion like sure it was hard but i was creating i felt like it was another part of me it felt less stressful in a way now when it's like all analytical and i'm just not smart and this shit's hard to memorize and there's so many fucking things that they want me to know within

the span of three days yeah i'm gonna be panicking a little bit and shit's gonna be hard and i'm gonna to be overworking myself um just a little bit and unfortunately with the part of like the whole college situation like I said it's gonna be hard you are going to experience some burnout um but let me kind of help you be less hard on yourself first of all it's gonna be hard work leading up to it as soon as you finish those exams like the rush of dopamine I would get because I just knew it was done and I could cross it off my list and not have to think about that exam oh my god best feeling ever so at least you have to look forward to that I didn't even give a fuck about what my grade was I was just like it's done I got it done I submitted it thank god it's over with um so

at least you have that to look forward to when it comes to studying don't stress yourself out over it of course you need to spend time doing it but after a certain amount of time like if you're the kind of person who spends like 12 hours in the library your brain just stops working so you really need to prioritize breaks and taking care of yourself when it comes to burnout make sure you're getting eight hours of sleep even yes if that means going to bed early earlier than you usually would you gotta make sure your brain is on a game okay so make sure you're getting enough sleep or else your brain won't function to be able to do the tasks you need to do also make sure you're eating enough food okay make sure you are staying a hydrated and be eating this is like

the one time just eat whatever the fuck you want okay i don't care if you're on a diet i don't care if you you know are like gluten free or whatever like eat a frozen pizza during this time if it means that you are going to be eating i don't care whatever it is make sure you are taking care of your brain and body um and not prioritizing school over that but but also by taking care of your brain and body um it's going to be able to function at a higher level so make sure you're eating a good healthy breakfast if you've got 8 a.m exams you got to make sure you eat before okay caffeine wise don't drink that shit past 3 p.m or else you are not going to be able to sleep and you're just going to lay there with so many anxious thoughts um drink as much as you want in the beginning i

get it i am a caffeine slut like i gotta have a coffee and a celsius and a red bull and a matcha in hand at all times like i hear you i get you um but just make sure you don't drink it past 3 p.m so you can get enough sleep sleep eat water caffeinate and maybe hold off on the partying while you can like pre-finals like at least a week or so before and really focus on studying and then afterwards make sure you have something planned or something that you can do in order to celebrate make sure you have like a celebratory situation lined up whether it's going to a frat party or having your friends over for a night or just like looking forward to spending a night alone with like your bong and a bottle of wine and some sushi whatever it is make sure you have

something that makes you excited about like celebrating yourself make sure you have that lined up post-final season um and yeah you'll get through it i promise you you're not alone there are hundreds upon millions of students who are going through the same situation right now with you turn towards your friends for some support turn towards your friends if you guys need a good cry or to just let it out i feel you go for it but i promise you're not alone in this and you will get through it and i'm so excited for you guys to finish this year of school oh my god it's gonna feel so good and then you got all summer and even if it's just working all summer at least you don't have to deal with school right all right love you someone asked you buy a lot of

secondhand items from depop slash poshmark yes also ebay also etsy also anywhere i can find anything that i'm looking for um i basically only buy secondhand unless i'm buying like good staple pieces for my closet um because there's a few companies that i really really look towards to buying those um that would be a uh los angeles apparel for any basics i literally just put an order in today for some new summer stuff i love their stuff i literally have stuff from when they wear american apparel like little booty shorts that i got in eighth grade that i still wear to this day like amazing quality has held up over the years over the many nights out um really recommend them also i only get my pants if they're not secondhand from urban outfitters just because

my measurements are a little weird and their pants seem to always fit me pretty well um but yeah that's only like 10% of my closet the rest is second hand on depop etsy wherever I can find it and I don't spend a lot of money on depop just because a lot of that shit's super expensive so what I'll do if I find something I like on there that like my for you page brought to me is I'll just look at it and then put the descriptor into google and usually it's being sold like on posh or on ebay for way cheaper um so just keep your eye out and it's kind of fun to do a little bit of hunting and see what you can find on these places but yeah i really recommend stopping shopping second hand very cheap you can find whatever you want and also you're not wasting

money on like a modern day sweatshop so love hi hannah i'm a little fucked up right now so excuse my um sentence formation but how do you deal with like internal jealousy i'm i have the sweetest boyfriend ever he can literally do no wrong he's so kind he reassures me but i find myself like so jealous like for no reason like he can literally be like oh i'm going to my my male friend's house like my male best friend's house and i'll be like like in my head i'll be like fucking like angry about it like and that's just because like that's how i was like in my past relationships like and that's how i was treated so i feel like it's like a reflection and like obviously he reassures me i know he's not like doing anything

bad but it's like how do you kind of overcome that like unsensical um jealousy anyways love you so much i love you oh my god i love you please forgive my sentence formation me as fuck every time i get on this podcast that was amazing okay listen i hear you i get you as a girl who comes from you know a traumatic place i of course have like past relationship issues that i see resurfacing within my own relationship and not in a way where it's like oh no i'm in a toxic relationship again more so it's like i've been conditioned to have these like fight or flight responses to very normal stimuli because some man in the past just fucked my brain up um and when it comes to that there's really two things that you can do within your relationship and i

think you should do both a is be open and honest with your partner about how you're feeling now I'm not saying like be open and honest like oh my god I know you're at that bitch's house and I know like freaking out like on him I'm saying be open and honest and be like I'm not gonna lie I have a little bit of past trauma and it makes me think like this so I would really appreciate when you're like doing these things to provide reassurance or if you know i say something crazy i'm really sorry feel free to call me out but please don't take it personally stuff like that like be open about the way you're thinking so then your partner can help you through it because not only are you going through it but when you're in a partnership and things like this arise you're both gonna kind

of go through it so it sounds like he's giving you reassurance which is fan-fucking-tastic like step one done easy number two is sometimes when I get into this position where I am like my brain is on like overdrive whether it's jealousy or I'm just like hyping myself in a thought spiral of something bad happening um or whatever you know crazy fucking insane thought that I'm having that I made up out of nowhere I this is this is insane but sometimes I literally will go to the bathroom, look myself dead in the eyes and be like, Hannah, you're being crazy as fuck right now. Like, do you see how you're behaving? He's not doing anything wrong. You are freaking yourself out by continuously thinking about this. You are putting yourself into a

negative space because you are forcing this thought upon yourself. He is lovely and kind and he has reassured me there's nothing I should be worried about and sometimes like me just saying those things to myself whether out loud or like looking myself in the face and thinking these thoughts really do help me be like okay I put my I put everything into perspective right and things are good I'm freaking out over nothing and I need to chill out and usually after I have that conversation with myself like my heart rate immediately goes down and what you should do is just try and distract yourself if you're having these thoughts you're also probably bored and very anxious um because of that so like go for a walk uh pick up a book literally scroll on tiktok

if you need to do distract these thoughts that's not great advice um but whatever you can do to snap your thought out of that kind of thought spiral um do it you know whatever really calls to you helps you distract yourself a great thing for me if you're a creative or anything like that is just sitting down and painting or sitting down and drawing um whatever comes innately to you and brings peace inherently lean towards that uh and that's a great way to just distract yourself away from those thoughts whatever you need to or put on a podcast love that as well and then also number three you know what we'll add a third one in not really something you can do but something i would like to remind you of is when you are trying to control a situation um there's no

really true sense of control within a relationship you you are never going to have control over that other person so you freaking yourself out and you wanting to put boundaries on him and wanting to tie him down and not wanting him to go out with his friends is going to do more harm than it is good you have to let another human being be a human being and if they make a bad decision that's on them but as a partner and as someone who's dedicated to you they should be making good decisions and if they're reassuring you unfortunately a part of a relationship is just trusting and listening to what they're saying um and if they lie to you if they fuck up if they do something bad unfortunately it's a part of life but also that has nothing to do with you absolutely nothing

that has everything to do with them being an awful human being and fucking up and making a horrible decision all right and there's no amount of control that you can place on a relationship to avoid that situation it's either going to happen or it's not going to happen and we just really have to trust within our hearts that we are choosing the right partner and they're being truthful to us a part of you know a relationship is just trust um and sometimes you just gotta dish it out even though your heart's being like girl what the fuck but if you have nothing to worry about it it is just like a thought that you have to be like girl chill the fuck out like i it's crazy but i'll look myself in the eyes in the mirror and be like you're being insane you're

being crazy and sometimes that helps but also i'm once again insane so try it out let me know what you think but you really have nothing to worry about babe he seems like a fantastic guy also i feel like this is a fantastic time to bring up the uh trope of the girl who sits inside and lays on her boyfriend's bed all day while he plays video games i don't want any of you girls to ever be that like i get it's fun every once in a while um but i have been the girl will it where it felt like my jail cell was my boyfriend's uh room and I never left um and that's a because my ex pressured me into doing that and didn't really want me to have any rights as a woman so bad anyways uh but also like you need to have a life outside of your partner you need to have

friends you need to put yourself out there um a partner is not gonna end all be all they're not gonna fix you they're not gonna fully complete you you need to have people and events and things outside of your relationship I feel like for a relationship to thrive because a that's a lot of pressure you're putting on your partner if they are your one key source of happiness um but also I don't want you guys to get trapped in a relationship where you are unallowed or not allowed to be a person and to you know have a life like your relationship is not your life yes you know it's something you're choosing and you're trusting in and you're being a part of but you need to have shit going on as an individual okay I don't want these men to

fucking lock you guys inside okay I want you guys to experience life and live life and also if you have like outside friends and outside things going on it does help a little bit with the relationship jealousy being like oh my god well he's going out it's like well you can go out too like if he's going out maybe just hit up a friend and be like hey let's go get some drinks or show up at a friend's work or take yourself on a date to the park or take this opportunity to go someplace that maybe your boyfriend isn't interested in you got to make sure you got things lined up for yourself a relationship is not everything within your life you still need to focus on what brings you happiness as an individual very important someone said what kind of songs or music do you

listen to when you're dot dot dot knocking boots lol um that is really funny and also fantastic question you know what a great album is you can put on anything honestly make sure there's no ads because i feel like if there's an ad break that's inherently a little awkward but just put on some like slow sexy tunes you know like um cali uchi's new album is fucking fantastic especially when you're in the bedroom i know people love like the weekend but he's a little too toxic for me because i would be listening to those lyrics and like giggling um put on some slow jazz k trinada's albums are always fantastic um yeah i say go for an album not just like song by song i say find an album that you really like and you can listen to all the way through

um because usually they're kind of they're like composed in a way where they all flow together so instead of like one song harshly into another they're usually they have like a flow to them you know what i mean so i say go for a good album that you really enjoy and just have fun oh someone said how to go from situationship to relationship this is a good question because i'm i've been there for three years like that was me and my boyfriend the thing is okay there is a there's two ways it can go genuinely a this man is showing interest in you you guys are a situationship you're mutually exclusive you communicate pretty openly just one of you is not ready yet and kind of unable to commit maybe needs more time

i think that's okay that's fine you can take as much time as you need but you got a question within yourself is this person right for me do i want to wait for this person um or am i just looking for something easy and quick and should i go elsewhere if the situationship is number one where it's like okay you know we are committed to each other just the titles scare people for some fucking reason no idea why um and maybe they need a little bit more time getting to know me because they've been hurt in the past and i would like to honor that and provide that for them um however long they need then yes i think that situationship can move into a relationship but b if you are trying to convince somebody to love you and convince somebody that you are worth being

loved then you are chasing the desire of feeling wanted and them constantly leaving you feeling unwanted is making you love the chase but that's not a love that i think you should throw yourself into and i don't think that's a situationship that can turn into a relationship openly communicate with this person hey i like you like yeah scary right but you have to be in control well me just saying don't be in control of a relationship but like you got to take control of your life a little bit if you're just waiting around waiting for someone to say how they fucking feel speak up say say what's on your mind okay be like hey I really like you and I think I could see a future with you and I'm having a lot of fun and I would like to keep having fun with you is that something

that you would like to do with me um or are you just having fun for now and don't really envision envision a future with me you can literally play that part of the podcast to them please do so and if they say no yeah i am having a lot of fun and i really like you and i'm not really seeing anybody else nor do i want to and i would like to move forward towards a relationship maybe i need a little bit more time then wonderful i'm sure you will probably have a blossoming relationship in the future um but b if you're like hey i like you and they're like aha cool i'ma text you at 3 a.m when i want some pussy don't waste your fucking time okay if you openly and honestly communicate how the fuck you feel to a person and they cannot get on board with even

listening to what is going on or honoring that emotion in any sort of way or you feeling love for another person scares them off maybe they're just weak maybe they're weak and you deserve a love that is like enthralling and you're throwing yourself into both parties okay that's what you deserve so ask yourself where is the situation ship standing and can i move forward this and honestly do i even want to move forward with this all right but i do think a situation ship can turn to a relationship as long as both parties are pretty equally invested within a relationship like even within dating people will tell each other that they love each other like at different times and i think that's okay some people know earlier than later some people are a little scared

some people are traumatized and i get it and i think providing space for them to like feel it out and ask those questions within themselves is very important and honestly i think it strengthens the relationship a little bit too because i'm the kind of person who likes to dive in fucking head first like within the first day of meeting you i'm like yeah i love you and you're gonna be mine forever like i don't know if you're a lover girl like me but when i set eyes on somebody it's like i'm going to fucking own you like i love you i'm obsessed with you like i'm gonna make you mine um and some people like are just simply not like that they know that they have interests but like love is very complicated for some people um and for me somebody who dives in very quickly

I appreciated kind of making myself wait it out and making myself like question and do is this a full judgment of mine like this is a good judgment of mine um do I actually like this person let me spend quality time with them to see if they're somebody that I actually do want to date because I found myself trapped in relationships before where it's like we got together within the first week and now we've been dating for you know whatever but still that time makes me feel like I need to stay in it when in reality I'm just not happy so like do the vetting and do the questioning in the beginning so you don't have to question in the end but yeah I do think a situation ship can turn into a relationship just say how you feel um and hopefully it'll be reciprocated

and some people take time and that's okay i think you should love or ask yourself if you can't you want them to take time if not then maybe just move on it's okay to move on from somebody um but i do think relationships take time sometimes and i think that's why there's a rise of situationships recently is because a lot of people don't want to dive into things pretty early they want to take time they want to make sure this is right for them which i think is healthy and okay to do so but if it's over like eight months i say fucking drop it drop it and run you know like a couple months a good three or four months i say that's when the that's when the rose-colored glasses like fall and then you're like oh shit

okay this is a real human being in front of me anyways love you I hope you are in love and I hope the other person loves you back because you deserve it hi Hannah uh I just want to bring up a conversation that I think a lot of people can probably relate to um so it's like you're in high school and you can't wait to graduate high school so you can move out of your parents house and maybe go to college if that's your thing and then you grow you go to college and you can't wait to graduate college so you can start a job and start making money and then you graduate college and you get your job and you look around and you're like well what now I don't know my job isn't bad I don't mind it at all it's just every day is kind of

the same and growing up is hard and weird and a big adjustment from being in school and being a child any advice is appreciated love you very much bye oh my god yes i think we can absolutely all relate and it's kind of like a real fucked up way to kind of place society or get society to move forward because if you think about it from the age we're born to which is zero from when we're born to when we're 18 no no to when we're 21 because that's when you know people graduate college let's say 23 because that's when people graduate college and then find a job and then find themselves where you are where it's like well what the fuck now our life is completely set up for us absolutely set up for us you go to

kindergarten maybe you go to preschool then you go to kindergarten you do elementary school then you move to middle school then you move to high school then you move to college then you get a job that is what is set up for us we know what to expect next we know what to look forward to next so all of a sudden when this routine is completely pulled out of our feet from under us and we're expected to be these quote-unquote working functioning adults none of us feel that way because we all of a sudden have choice we all of a sudden have complete and utter freedom there is no next thing other than what the fuck you want to do which I think is kind of beautiful and wonderful in a sort of sense but I do understand the inherent dread that it throws

into people kind of being like oh my god I don't know what to do next I'm panicking because I don't have something lined up I don't have something to work forward to and also I do not know how to work forward towards something because I've never really had to do that all of my goals have been pre-set up for me and now I don't know how to goal set and that's kind of hard especially when you're supposed to be seen as this quote-unquote working functioning adult when in reality you have no idea what the next fucking step is going to be but the only thing you can really do is take one step forward even that is even if that is you know completing today all right you have today done you can get tomorrow done you can keep moving forwards and then maybe it's okay well I have

this thing coming up and I would really enjoy doing that thing and now you move the next foot forward and move the next foot forward until the thing comes up then the thing's done and then you look around there's nothing around and then you do another thing or then you have another goal that you place but the key is you need to look forward just enough to really set goals and go after those goals whether big or small and goals can be anything like waking up at 8 a.m or eating healthy or I would like to go for a walk today or I'm getting lunch with a friend this day or I'm trying this new class or I'm gonna go after this promotion literally anything you want and that is the beautiful fucking thing you can do anything with your life there's no more goals set for you

to achieve there are no more big things for you to do you've crossed everything off of the societal you know list even if you haven't like shit I didn't even graduate college fuck it you know like but I've gotten to the point where it's like okay there's nothing more for me to do now the future is open and endless and i can really do anything and that is so exciting that's so fucking exciting and you have to get excited for it you can't get dreadful about the long endless future that there is because it's going to exist either way so why not just get excited and actually make goals for yourself that get you excited about life and make you want to wake up in the morning instead of just rolling around on the floor and being like well i don't know what to do

i don't know what to do i'm scared it's like we all feel that fear but you have to feel it and do it anyway do you know what i mean so wonderful thing about this is you can move forward with your life there is no this is the end you've reached the peak okay i say this all the time my peak is going to honestly be at 80 years old when i am retired and i have my little garden and I'm chain smoking outside with all of the neighborhood street cats like that is going to be my peak so everything I do between here and there I just hope 80 year old Hannah has a fucking fantastic time hanging out and thinking about all the old memories that I've accumulated all the goals that I have gone after and achieved all of the things that I have done with my life

in order for me to stay happy and stay healthy and stay moving forward I'm hoping that I can do everything that calls towards me until I get to 80 years old and then I can chill and look back on my life and appreciate everything I've done with it but no one's going to assign these things for you there's no more teachers there's no more you know syllabi there's no more uh you know tests I know crazy to all my college people there there will be no more tests one day I insane right but you kind of have to like teacher yourself and parent yourself through it and set goals for yourself and give yourself fucking assignments to do and to try but the wonderful thing about being an adult is like you can fail those assignments and like not freak out and be like

okay cool i learned something i guess i won't do it again or i'm gonna try harder next time do you know what i mean and also with the divine timing thing stop living in the future and stop living in other people's realities of what they're doing with their life or you're going to be caught up in their life and you are never going to do anything or you're going to be caught up in the future of what you want but not actually going like forward towards it and you're never going to actually move forward because you're going to be paralyzed in fear live in the now do what you can right now create goals for yourself so you can move forward but also understand that the universe is going to bring what is deserving towards you at all times okay whether you think

it it is what's best for you or not the universe is going to provide that towards you all we can really do is handle the situation the best we can and keep moving forward but if you want and you desire and you go after your goals whatever they are that you set for yourself the universe will repay you and they it will push into you and it will grant you gifts as crazy as it fucking seems it really will so listen to yourself ask yourself what the fuck do i want to do like oh my god you've you've spent 23 years of your life never asking yourself what you want to do now you have this wonderful moment to be like oh my god what do i want to do i literally have free will now like it's like being a gta it's like playing gta like you can literally go do whatever the

fuck you want or sims you can create a family if you want you can go to this country if you want you can get this car if you want you can meet these people if you want you can live in this area if you want ask yourself what you want to do and go after it chase your dreams chase your goals let's we have one life to live and it seems so fucking long but in the span of like how many years the universe has existed it's not a long time so stop wasting time and start going after what truly calls to your desires and what calls to your gut stop wasting your time on menial little things you know what i mean of course like survive work a job make money you know like we gotta unfortunately exist within society but that doesn't mean you can't go after the things that

give you passion and i highly recommend doing so love you someone also said thank you for showing me how to properly love women yes not only is this a podcast for the girls but it's also a podcast for their boyfriends okay you better treat my girls correctly or i'm gonna put you on blast yep someone also asked how do i open communication with my partner uh this is what you do you look him dead in the face and you say i'm gonna tell you how i feel and i don't want you to respond for a minute I want you to sit with it and think about how I feel like they're not allowed a response for a minute I want them to sit and think about what you said okay without thinking over you and thinking about what the response is going to be because I feel like that's what a lot of people

do and that's how relation or that's how communication goes sideways because everybody wants something to say sometimes it's like no I want you to see what I'm feeling and just sit with it okay so literally tell them that if they can't handle you saying that they're immature need to break up with them uh once they're like okay yes ma'am you tell them how you feel all right and tell them how you feel you both just sit in uncomfortable silence but also you get the shit off your chest that you need to get off your chest and then you sit with it and then you're like, that's how I feel. How do you feel? And if they can't mature and honestly and openly communicate with you and sit with you and honor your feelings, then I don't think they're mature

enough to be in a relationship. Period. Point blank. Anyways. Hey, Hannah. Love the pod, of course. Funny-ish question. Funny yet a little sad. What advice do you have for the low libido girlies, I literally just have no desire to masturbate ever. I'm in a long-distance relationship so like I only have sex every like two or three weeks like when I see my boyfriend but even then like I'm not, I'm not very orgasmic. Like the sex is good but like I don't know that I just don't seem to have that sex drive especially when I'm like alone. Like I just can't seem to get horny for the life of me so i would love some advice thank you so much love you girl honestly fantastic question i feel like a lot of the girlies listening probably go

through the same thing or have had the same issue um i feel like within periods of my life i've been like not horny not horny not horny very horny not horny not horny very horny very horny not like it comes in phases you know what i mean and for me personally um a lot of my low libido phases were because of the medication i was taking now i'm not saying give up your medication like i think that is very important but i think it's important to be like maybe it's not you maybe it's the medication maybe it's a little side effect possibly but also like some girls or every girl is going to have a different sex drive based on our hormones based on how we're feeling based on just how interested in sex we are some people are not

interested in sex at all and go years without it and fantastic wonderful amazing but some girls are like i could fuck 10 times a day and i think there's beauty in that we're all we're all very different we all have different sex drives that's gonna be very normal if you have a low sex drive nothing's wrong with you nothing needs to be quote unquote fixed i think it's just something you can work with and by owning it you are stepping into yourself a little bit maybe you just have a low sex drive and that's okay and that's wonderful and that's beautiful now if you're looking to maybe up your sex drive in a sort of way i think it's important to touch on the topic of like female sensuality um men are just like yeah i can be horny within 20 seconds and then stick my dick

in something and come within the next two minutes like there is no stimuli really needed they can just like imagine a pair of titties and like get off within a couple minutes which is cool and all but when it comes to you know research in women and you know there being not a lot um and most doctors being mainly men and you know sexual education being put on mainly by men sex as it's known especially for women is something that's like okay it happens quick you should just be into it you know there doesn't need to be a foreplay or whatever um and that's just not how that fucking works that's just that's not how it works baby that is not how it works okay i mean yeah sometimes in the mood i'm in the mood and i'm like yeah i can just drop my panties

and have some fucking sex but usually i'm like i like the build-up i like a little bit of like waiting and a little foreplay and a little nude and a little he he text you know like miss you whatever you know like i i like that build-up whether it's long distance like what you could possibly do within the weeks that you are apart or um physically you know you're around each other but you don't immediately jump on top of each other as soon as you see each other you know little kiss you know maybe some touching maybe some romantic music maybe some dancing light a candle you know do something that is like a little bit of foreplay and foreplay doesn't start in the bedroom foreplay starts as soon as you guys see each other and touch okay it's a long fucking

game and not only do you have to play it but your partner also has to play it so if low libido is something that you struggle with maybe like just tell your partner like hey I would like to you know get a little saucy get into some foreplay a little bit um maybe send them a little risque text uh you know get excited in that sort of way and then you can kind of build it up and I think when you finally get together that's how you get kind of like the dynamite explosion instead of just being like oh i should be able to come fucking rainbows out of my pussy and have the best experience ever was in the span of like three hours it's like no let's play the long haul you know let's let's play the long game here let's really build up this sensuality this sexuality

this desire this horniness and then let's release it and the longer kind of the better i can't lie um you know i love a little foreplay i think we as women need foreplay consistently throughout our lives especially to feel you know sexy and wanted and desired whether it's like foreplay with yourself like oh i'm gonna you know dance around my house and put on some cute music and light a candle and i'm gonna spend my time naked and i'm gonna do a bubble bath and then i'm gonna like masturbate like whether it's foreplay with yourself or foreplay with your partner i i think it's very important and it's a big step that's overlooked especially with uh sexuality with women we need to we want to feel loved and desired okay not only from ourselves but from our sexual

partners um and not receiving that yeah could definitely lead to low libido or or you know lack of fireworks during that big oh moment but i love you nothing's wrong with you if you're inherently not a very sexual person that's a-okay i don't want you to feel pressured into it um but maybe try foreplay maybe that's your forte maybe uh look into some kinks that you have that you can explore with your partner um or just maybe tell your partner sex isn't that important to me and if that's how you feel stick by it and own it and your partner should respect it love you someone said i used to be close-minded about raves but now i'm intrigued any advice on how to start literally go to anything find a friend who's down and is adventurous or maybe a friend who's already

into raves and say hey i really want to go to one but i'm a little nervous will you go with me you know what i mean but also you can definitely go to them alone um just don't do anything like crazy like don't do a bunch of drugs and drink a bunch like make sure you are aware of your environment if you are going alone anywhere you know what i mean um i love raves though they are so accepting they are so open to people i love the fashion i love the you know culture i love the environment um the music's always fun it's just a big giant fucking dance party so if you're gonna go to one i say just buy a ticket you can look on edm train who's coming to your you know local area pick one that's at a venue that you really like or have been wanting to go to find

a really fun crazy outfit and literally there's no there's no outfit too crazy i used to be like oh my god i'm going in underwear to this rave like are people gonna be like why is this girl's ass cheeks out and then i would go to the like edm artist and go to their tagged pictures and all the girls were just like half naked and i was like okay good love it if you are confused on what the attire should be go to the artist page check the tags um also a festival if there's a festival coming to your area highly fucking recommend now festivals are a whole different situation i think you should go to just a regular rave first to see if you enjoy it but they are amazing um everybody is so loving everybody's so kind everybody's there to party have a good fucking time and dance

their asses off there's no like quote-unquote way to dance because like everybody's kind of out of their mind at these so like there's nothing too weird in fact the weirder people are the better like people will be in like banana costumes men in like maid outfits girls half naked girls with their titties out um you know like everybody's there to have a fantastic time no judgment literally no judgment the bathroom the girls bathroom at a rave is like my favorite safe space because everybody's just like oh my god you're so beautiful you're so gorgeous can i put glitter on you can i kiss you like love that energy that energy is addicting and that energy emanates throughout the entire concert so i say just go for it live your best life if you think

that's gonna be like a good time it's definitely gonna be a good time okay i never thought i would like raves in fact i kind of judged people who went to raves because i knew nothing about them and they honestly saved my life and showed me a part of myself that I was really withholding and pushing down and being able to go to them and let that free and kind of just let my freak flag fly openly and have people be like yeah I love you for that that is so reaffirming and wonderful and amazing and EDM shows are some of my favorite concert experiences so if you're even thinking about going to one go absolutely go someone asked you prefer sativa or indica I'm definitely more of indica girly i used to be a sativa girly because i would just like to get mind fucked up but now

as somebody who like needs my mind a little bit sharper and not completely like out of this world i do prefer an indica i like the the relaxation body oh my god the relaxation feeling my body gets um which is also why i love cbd because cbd kind of has the same effect of course there's way more psychoactive components in like regular indica strain of weed um and there's really none in cbd but that like kind of chilled out body high you get from indica is why i love cbd and use it quite frequently also if i have a sativa on hand i'll mix cbd in with the sativa just to kind of offset how intense that punch will be like when i was younger it's like yeah knock me out bitch like i want that entire edible i want to smoke that entire blunt but now that i'm getting older i'm

like holy shit my brain is actual mush i need to chill out a little bit and indica and cbd is like the number two ways i or the the two the two ways that i do that shit whoa oh my god once again psa take care of your brain drink some water eat healthy don't do all the fucking drugs i did but yeah i love indica also if you want a good cbd company as you guys know paz packs my ultimate favorite they will ship it to your house they have the highest quality stuff they have the cutest fucking packaging and you can use code smoke sesh for 10 off your order if you're interested if you want to give it a little shot people have asked me if they come in discrete packaging aka just like regular packaging like just a plain old cardboard box um i'm gonna say

usually they come with a picture of their logo on the outside but I have had a few of you guys DM them and ask for discreet packaging and I think they can do that so maybe you know reach out if they can't they can't um but I do know the discreet packaging uh usually it has a logo on it but Paz Pax is also like what is it gonna be you know what I mean it doesn't say like smoking on the outside if you're worried but I love them I'm obsessed with them um and they are absolutely one of my favorites and a part of my routine daily hey bae I love your podcast um I just need a little advice um because in what or listening to your other podcasts um you've said that in order to like grow as a person you have to love yourself um as you are instead of

like hating yourself into a better person and I think that's such good advice I was just wondering like how you do that whenever you suffer from low self-esteem thank you so much you're so amazing I love you love you I feel this especially growing up in like the tumblr era where like being awful and horrible to yourself and being demeaning to yourself like was the in thing like that was the thing to do and switching from like oh I'm gonna hate myself into a better person to oh I'm gonna love myself into a better person mindset was very fucking hard because all the people i saw around me with like top tier confidence you know like doing amazing things like loving themselves into a better person were like perfect people like they were perfect people

and i was kind of sitting there like no wonder of course you can love yourself um now how the fuck am i gonna love myself because i look nothing like you or i don't live in this place or i don't have the same exact lifestyle as this person how am i going to be able to do this and the thing is when it comes to loving yourself into a better person it's not from the fact of oh i love myself because i'm perfect oh i love myself because my hair is so long oh i love myself because i'm so skinny or oh i love myself because i have so much money or i love myself because of no no no that's not how you love yourself into a better person you love yourself into a better person by being unapologetic for who you are naturally you are utterly accepting not only of the positive

traits of yourself but also the negative traits of yourself like yeah sure i'm a little weird and my nose is a little crooked and i'm a little bit of an odd person and i talk a little bit too much but i love that about myself like i love myself for my faults and i love myself for the things i'm good at um you just have to understand that we as human beings are made inherently good the universe put or not the universe society puts these kind of like needs on us or these things that we have to live up to that in the grand aspect of things don't really fucking matter at all they're just like a societal checkpoint or a societal standard that is kind of impossible to achieve so people are consistently chasing after it but those don't mean shit in the grand

spectrum of things those don't matter at all so why feel unlovable because you don't reach these standards or you don't reach these points or you're not conventionally attractive who gives a fuck we are all flawed no matter how beautiful we are all problematic no matter how good our heart is we're all gonna fuck up we're all human beings and I think that is so wonderful and brilliant and beautiful and amazing about us as humans is that we are all so different we all behave so differently we all approach the world so differently we all look so different and that is incredible and that's what I love about being myself and that's what I love about other people I have constantly since a young age surrounded myself with people who were comfortable within

themselves no matter what all right and I don't know why I didn't follow suit maybe it's because I was a little hard on myself maybe it's because my parents were hard on myself maybe it's because I was looking at myself like I was under a fucking microscope whatever it is give yourself some distance, forgive yourself, provide yourself some peace, and show yourself the love that you are deserving of. Absolutely. 1,000%. I love people who are unashamed of who they are. I navigate towards people who know who they are and don't give a fuck about what other people think. That's the kind of people I love. And so that's the kind of person that I try and, you know, emulate after in a sense. Accept your flaws, accept your positives, but don't think that you are unlovable

because you are not living up to this society, you know, standard, all right? Society wants us to be unlovable. Society wants us to chase that feeling of love, you know, that you chase after when you feel undesirable they want that you know but we don't have to feed into that you can love yourself exactly for who you are as long as you are accepting of yourself and you don't let anybody else fuck with you literally don't take their opinions personally don't take what they think about you personally if they don't like you that's their fault because you love yourself and you accept yourself fully maybe you guys just don't mesh as human beings and that's fine they can go do their own thing and you will accept people into your life who love you completely and fully for

who you are also raves taught me a lot about this yeah raves taught me a lot about like who was i accepting into my life were they loving of me were they staring at me like with a glare when i was having fun dancing or were they dancing with me you sometimes have to hold your hand and dance with yourself too I feel like that's a good metaphor for loving yourself it's just not being shameful of allowing yourself to be free but standing hand in hand with yourself and supporting yourself through it it's not always going to be easy everybody thinks to be like loving yourself is the easy choice uh-uh fortunately it's the hard choice but you get a lot out of it sometimes the harder choice is the best choice because you learn so much through it um and easy things are

not always the best but i love you and you'll get there and yeah hey hannah so i was just listening to the most recent episode of the pod which i love but you were talking about how you are so thankful that 16 year old you was able to speak up and say that you need help and honestly listening to that part of the pod just made me start tearing up and crying a little bit because it sounded so similar to my own situation like two years ago when I myself was 16 and it just makes me feel really happy that there's other people other individuals who have felt the same way well not happy that they felt the same way but it makes me happy that I'm not alone which it's just really nice to hear your story and I'm just so thankful for you and

the pod and I feel like you're helping us all grow so much and I think that we all love you um also do you have any tips for people who are severely addicted to nicotine I want to quit so bad please help love you now I'm tearing up because this makes that makes me so happy my one goal of the podcast was to touch people but like literally like touch people and let them know that they're not alone in the hardships they're going through being a human is so fucking weird i get it it is so confusing and sometimes we just need a little bit of community whether it's you know in person or online and i am so thankful that i have been able to create this beautiful sense of community that we have through a little online smoke sesh that

we can all do together literally like millions of you guys joined it's fucking crazy imagine just a million girlies just passing joints around like i love that idea if you don't smoke you can hang out in the middle but like i love you all and thank you for being here and thank you for being on the journey of you know trying to better ourselves and you know looking towards the past and thanking ourselves and looking towards the future and having hope while also enjoying the day that we are in currently um and you know being a human is hard so if we can do it together then what's better than that you know what i mean i love you thank you for calling in that made my fucking day um and nicotine yes addictions fun not fun um when it comes to nicotine it is a very

very highly addictive substance so like straight up weaning yourself off of it does not work like it does not work and unfortunately there aren't like things you can replace it with um by continuing nicotine in a different form or a different substance whether it's a gum patch you are still feeding that brain response of i need something and i'm giving in and i'm getting it you know my brain is giving the signal that i want something and i'm giving in and i'm getting it in a different form it's still the same so honestly when it comes to nicotine you really just have to go cold turkey you just gotta quit it throw that shit away tell your friends tell them please don't vape around me for the first month because i'm really going to try and

do this um and really just stick by your side and do it unfortunately it takes a month about a month but by the third week you'll be good and i think going cold turkey is the best way to do it now you are still going to get those brain signals so a healthy way of kind of filling in the addiction is get a water bottle with a straw lid and make sure that shit's full of ice cold water every single day okay make sure it's constantly filled whenever you get that feeling of like sucking on a little nick stick you just you put a water bottle there instead you know and also try and make sure you're staying busy especially when it comes to tea breaks i always tell people to stay busy stay busy stay busy so you're not sitting around at home and smoking all day

um make sure you're staying busy when it comes to uh you know your life and you're not sitting around and constantly having this thing on you it's going to take time it's gonna feel weird your body is going to go through a little bit of withdrawals but that's also because you're chemically addicted to something and the only way to really get off of it is to just completely cold turkey stop so maybe if you're in college and you're like oh all my friends vape you know but I'm going home this summer and I'm gonna be around my parents and I can't really vape around them like maybe take that summer break as like opportunity to be like okay no like I'm gonna stop now like I'm gonna go three months not do it try and stick towards it and also I think when

you're goal setting it's important to share with your friends so then if they're real friends they'll like help you stick to it if you're like oh can I have a hit of it they're like no no no no you cannot because you're on a break girl you know what i mean but i am four years post nicotine i don't crave it if i hit it i cannot even stand it um so yeah if i can do it miss addiction here if i can literally stop you can too and i just completely went cold turkey and i went cold turkey also kind of like had a negative response to it but i went cold turkey because it was making me break the fuck out, and I decided, like, okay, we gotta prioritize our skin here, um, because I was getting, like, four cystic acne pimples a day, it was bad, it was literally

killing my skin, I looked 30 years old, and I was, like, 20, so bad, drop the nicotine, you will feel so much better, I saw someone compare, compare it also to, like, the feeling of using the restroom, um, it's like, okay, your brain gives you the signal that you need to use the restroom, um and you can either you know go to the bathroom and fulfill that uh that need right away or you know it's the same thing with using the bathroom you can just like push it off and the feeling will go away but eventually it will come back you just have to keep pushing it off maybe it's not like using the restroom but that feeling that need that urge nicotine gives you that same kind of like brain stimuli intense urge um so just keep pushing it

off try and supplement with different items not nicotine and stay strong i believe in you i think you can absolutely do it also thank you for the words of encouragement i love all my girlies here thank you for joining me it has been such a fun beautiful little tuesday i need to get this out to you guys because i'm already getting dms um like bitch where's the fucking pod what what are you doing with your day why is it not out i'm so sorry i will yes ma'am i will make sure it is up right now but i love you guys thank you so much for joining me as you guys know follow my instagram at hannah marlene for any fun little updates photos you know things that i've been up to my patreon is linked to my bio if you would like to join um and yeah i will see you all again next

tuesday for the spring equinox i'll have some rituals i'll have some fun spring cleaning tips i will also have some confessionals for you as well so stay tuned for a very fucking fun episode see you soon