Smoke Sesh - burnout, binge eating, surviving eclipse season & the real glow up

Episode Date: October 24, 2023

Happy Tuesday hotties! I’m up bright and early to hang out with you all on this rainy chill morning. First off wanted to let everyone know there is a restock on baby tees only open until Friday, check out the link in my instagram @hannahmarlene to get yours! We get right into it talking about my recent night out and weed vs alcohol, we talk surviving burnout and prioritizing yourself, current movie recommendations for the season, new favorite acne care, right person wrong time, fake it till you make it and getting the promotion/job, how to overcome binge eating, cheating, comparison, the real glow up, smoke spots, attraction, what other people think, humbling a man, consumerism, hobbies, the devil, surviving midterms, surviving eclipse season, how to actually clean your room, hair growth & split ends, and finally favorite weed accessories and companies with some encouragement for you all through this high energy time with midterms, burnout and the current eclipse season we’re in. Love you all so very much thank you for all the support and I can’t wait to see you all next Tuesday!! MUAH!

listen everybody needs a fairy godmother you know just somebody to look out for them some people call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sash so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all good morning hotties of the world and i mean like morning morning because it is 9 a.m and i am finally up to record a podcast oh my god usually you know i sleep in i have my little day off i wake up i have my little coffee you know and i get around to recording the pod at like 11 maybe noon if I'm really taking my time but this morning I was up bright and early 7 30

a.m I did not think my brain was going to be able to function that early honestly but I think it ended up working out pretty well I've been getting honestly too much sleep and I find when I get too much sleep I am more tired than if I get less sleep or like just eight hours so now that I'm running on like seven and a half I'm feeling honestly pretty good I woke up really early this morning to have breakfast with one of my amazing great friends she had just gotten off like a 12-hour night nurse shift um and yeah we went off for breakfast at like 8 a.m smoked a joint in my car it was fantastic it's so funny growing up because like now instead of hanging out with your friends at night because that's what you used to do when you were in high school

because that's the only time you had now you're like waking up at 7 30 a.m to just hang out with your friend because they work night shifts you really gotta adapt you know that's how you keep long-term healthy adult friendships you gotta just be down for whatever so we went there had an amazing breakfast I had a little double shot espresso latte situation fantastic I am ready to get down and dirty and record a pod now if I am a little loopy apologies it is because I got up early but I think it's gonna make for a really fun podcast honestly she was so sweet we were leaving she's like do you want an edible for the road I'm like I would but I think since I got up so early if i eat an edible right now at 9 a.m i my brain is not going to be able to function and

i'm just going to go into a catatonic state probably just fall asleep for four hours so thank you queen appreciate it but we are just raw and real and espresso shotted up this morning um and yeah those are the vibes for today i think you guys i think i need to go sober for a while well California sober you know how it'd be I don't know drinking is just not the vibe recently I just it hasn't it hasn't been agreeing with me on Thursday so I was supposed to go out to dinner with a good friend of mine you know just casual little drinks dinner and then maybe a little nightcap have another drink and go to bed supposed to be chill my problem is I am just not chill i'm not chill and i can't control myself so since i have no self-control maybe i need to

chill for a while honestly i don't think i really did this to myself though because i only had three drinks but the problem is in the service industry if they know you're in the service industry bartenders servers whatever they will take care of you because they know that you get it do you know what i mean like if you are a server or a bartender you get it and i'm gonna take care of use then you take care of me you know it's a little wink a little give and take but they were pouring me triple shot vodka sodas and I had no idea I had no idea so when I'm blackout drunk throwing up in my sink sorry TMI I'm like what's happening because I only had three drinks like did I get roofied no they were just being extra nice and I didn't know but after that I was like

whoa I need to chill I need to chill the fuck out so after that crazy night of literally projectile vomiting in my sink having to clean it up the next morning having the worst hangover in my entire life I'm like you know what maybe the drinking just isn't a vibe even like I don't know I feel like I just drink to socialize I feel more comfortable socializing and I could eat the edible and I'll do this it'll do the same thing and I won't be hung over the next day or I won't like black out and throw up everywhere you know what I mean like I can smoke a joint and I can get that same vibe so I think I'm just gonna stick to the weed to protect my sanity almost I am hanging out this morning with my cat danger if you hear him throwing his little toy around that I just got him

apologies but he is really just living his best life I just gave him a little one of those like cat tuna go-gurt treats and then I bought him a new little squirrel toy and he's losing his goddamn mind right now he's loving it so it's just me and him hanging out this morning and you guys I know what you're all here for I am ready to get into all of your deepest darkest questions one more thing off my to-do list before we get into it t-shirts baby tees got weed baby tees there's a restock going on I am doing one last restock it'll be open until Friday so if you are listening to this um whatever day of the week it is Tuesday Wednesday Thursday or Friday go to my Instagram at Hannah Marlene it'll be linked in my bio that's where you can buy the t-shirts um and yeah thank

you for supporting me thank you guys for showing up for me thank you for showing up for yourself and with that being said let's get into it also people were asking for baby tea wash instructions the instructions are flip it inside out before washing so then the rhinestones aren't like rubbing on everything and then you can i'm pretty sure you can dry them i've dried mine a few times but if you want it to last just like don't dry it like leave it out it's not gonna be gross it's not gonna like ruin the shirt in any sort of way I have realized a lot of my clothes growing up and like actually learning how to wash clothes I have to not dry them or else they get like way too small and I have to like re-stretch them out and that's weird just if you find that you have a tight

fitting piece of clothing and these baby tees are definitely going to be a tight fitting piece of clothing and then the adhesive or if you have like a good graphic on a t-shirt that you don't want to ruin um like maybe you have a cool hoodie or like a cool shirt that has like a fun graphic on it don't dry them because it's going to heat up like the glue and the adhesive and then the like um like the paints that's on the shirt and it's going to crack or it's going to fall off so if you're like tight clothing or anything with like fun graphics on it including the rhinestone shirts wash them inside out and then wash them on cool or like normal if you can not high heat so it's not messing with the applique and then don't dry them and I guarantee your clothing will be amazing

for much longer than you ever could have imagined so care instructions wash inside out how you normally do or on cool if possible and then don't dry them just set it out get a little drying rack put it up on a clothesline oh to have a cute little house with my own land with like chickens the clothesline that I can go out there and put my clothes up wow the vibe but anyways just don't don't dry them or do but if you want them to last longer don't dry them okay let's get into it because I feel the burnout I do I feel like we hit this mid-fall point whether you're in academics or you're into the real world now and you start feeling the burnout and you're just like holy shit I need a break I hear you guys I understand you absolutely valid I have been taking off a

little bit too much work recently because of that but someone asked how to keep your motivation after busting your ass the whole semester there's the kinds of people who a just like go hard and keep going hard because they love the pain and they kind of thrive off of it not me but there's also the kind of people which is me who like working hard but I have to play hard rest hard in order for me to keep going I think that's going to be the majority of the population here so I think if you are curious how to keep your motivation going especially with the semester kind of hitting a midway point and you're like girl I just want this to be over I want it to Christmas break you're almost there if you have a day or even a couple hours take the time to like

do what you think you need for your mental health whether it's I'm gonna go get a big bowl of pho and treat myself to my favorite meal or I need just like a two-hour power nap or I just want to zone out and scroll on my phone for the evening and I don't really want to go out tonight or maybe it's i am going to prioritize my school for a second and i'm just going to go to the library for three hours and then spend the rest of my night chilling going to bed early whatever you need to do to kind of prioritize yourself before you get back onto the prioritizing your life your academics whatever it may be do so that is equally as important as turning in your assignment or finishing your midterm you have to take care of yourself if you don't take care of yourself

you're gonna crash and burn trust me I was in nursing school and the girls who survived nursing school were the girls who were able to simultaneously prioritize themselves and their academics so focusing on academics but then when they do have that spare bit of free time taking a moment to like really focus on what they want to do maybe I don't want to go out partying maybe i just want to sleep in tonight or maybe i need to go to bed early because i have a really important 8 a.m test the next day those are the girlies who survived the girlies who didn't survive or the girlies were like well i'm just gonna i'm just gonna hustle and i'm gonna go out every night and then they're gonna burn out they're gonna crash and burn and i've seen it

happen too many times so girl take that nap this is me giving you permission okay do whatever you need to do to take care of yourself while also taking care of your academics it will benefit you in the long term if you're like hey i don't have time for a nap yes you do find it in your schedule it will benefit it'll benefit you long term more than it will short term absolutely take care of yourselves your academics are important but they aren't everything and your academics will suffer if you do not take care of yourself focus on yourself prioritize what you need in life you have the time you can do it I believe in you and also it's almost Christmas you're like no it's not yes it is I feel like once you get over the hump of Halloween you literally just blink and

then it's Christmas so much fun the holidays are coming up you will have your winter break soon do the damn thing hustle a little harder you will get there I love you take care of yourself someone asked for some movie recommendations and I think since it's Halloween I just really encourage everybody to go watch every scary movie you can like i love being a little nervous a little scared cuddled up in bed you know that's the vibe for right now also if you kind of want that vibe but not really you but you want something spooky and fun to watch watch practical magic i just watched that the other day and it is so good i haven't seen it since i was younger but i forgot how good that movie is uh practical magic that should be on your list every october to watch so

if you haven't seen it go watch it someone asked get rid of pimples fast girl i feel you you seem to be panicking my newest tried and true product for if you're having just like a big pimple a small pimple a blackhead whatever you cannot get out or cannot seem to get rid of the mario bedescu i don't know how to say it mario bedescu drying lotion it's like a tiny little glass bottle with pink liquid inside it is the best thing ever I used to swear by those star face pimple patches which are good if you're trying to keep your hands off your face or like a spot you know you want to go into public but I'm telling you at night before you go to bed dip a little q-tip into the drying lotion dot it onto the spot it will be gone in the morning it will completely shrink it get rid of it

or bring the pimple to a head so it's ready to pop one of the two but it is my new holy grail when i tell you i am almost through a bottle and i've had it for like two months and i am immediately about to go get more it is fantastic if you are in a bind you need to get rid of a pimple fast mario badescu drying lotion dotted on right before you go to bed i guarantee it will be taken care of love you someone asked thoughts on right person wrong time is it a thing or am i delulu no i actually think that's a thing especially being young and falling in love and not really having a full grasp and concept on love or what love should look like or what's good love right person wrong time is a real thing because we are all still learning so much about

ourselves and especially about ourselves in relationships or what we're looking like or looking for in partners so yes I think that is very much so a real thing and like if you are enjoying a person and you're like wow we could be great in 20 years that is a real and valid feeling and you should listen to it because it probably means you are not completely and utterly happy right now and that's okay it just means maybe we need to be looking for a different person or maybe i need to focus on myself right now in order to be at a more complete uh complete place um or maybe this is a complete partner for me and i need to be looking for a complete partner but yes you are not delusional i promise right person wrong time is very real it's a little heartbreaking i

understand but if you feel like this person is not good enough for you right now they might be good enough for you in the future but right now is all that matters love you Okay, someone said, my lack of wit and enthusiasm might cost me my promotion. Tips? My tip is, don't let anything get in the way of you and your money. Now, if you're out of place and you're like, this promotion is going to cost me my soul and I also hate where I'm working, maybe let's not focus on the promotion and maybe let's focus on finding a job elsewhere. like fuck the promotion let me just use this like job as a stepping stone because I hate it here

but if you love it and you are the only person getting in the way of your promotion girl you better fake it till you make it when people go into job interviews and they're like I didn't get it because I told the truth I'm like why are you telling the truth you're literally supposed to be going in there and bragging about yourself no it's a little scary no it's a little intimidating but like they only want to hear good things they only want to hear the amazing wonderful brilliant qualities about yourself they don't want to hear the bad things they don't want to hear you put yourself down you have to hype yourself up so if you gotta have just like a little bit more enthusiasm and you are not an enthusiastic person girl you better go in there with a smile even if

it pains you sometimes you got to do what you got to do and once you secure that promotion then you can chill out a little bit but if that promotion is going to bring you a lot of money and you enjoy where you are sometimes you just got to fake it till you make it and unfortunately that's a part of the corporate world you know like your boss wants to see you happy enthusiastic ready to go even if it's 8 a.m and you don't want to do anything right now that's how they want to see you wait till they're gone for you to be like okay fuck this place okay but when your manager comes around or when your boss comes around oh my god how are you girl I am just so excited to be here tonight like you gotta fake it till you make it in every situation but specifically the

situations where you are gonna make some money okay don't let yourself get in the way of your money but if you feel like you're selling your soul to this company maybe let's look elsewhere like fuck the promotion maybe let's look at this place as a stepping stone to a place that you actually are going to enjoy and want to smile at work you know what I mean love you girl you got this oh this is a good question especially for my stoners because I feel like this is a big habit for us but someone asked um where to go what should I do if I keep on binge eating so whether you're just getting high and getting crazy munchies at night or you know you have just picked up a bad habit maybe you're restricting your eating so then you fall into binge eating

patterns pretty regularly i do have some tips for you because i have fallen into this pattern of behavior a lot and i think we put a little bit too much emphasis on it and emphasis in a way where we think of it as something hard to control but I think it is a lot easier to control than you might think and let me put it into perspective for you so first of all um you need to understand that all binges are caused by the urge to binge so you only binge to cope with the urge to binge and get the subsequent like anxiety anticipatory relief from the craving um so there's no greater meaning to your binges thinking otherwise will actually validate your binges and make it harder to stop many things may trigger an urge but the actual binge itself is always caused by the thought

along the lines of hey let's binge eat right now everyone gets stressed bored angry but not everyone binges because they don't get the urge in the first place because they never developed the habit It is simply just a habit, a thought kind of habit that you have developed by having that anxiety anticipatory relief, which is also like subsequently training your brain to keep doing this thing to find that sort of quick relief. so the urge to binge is not you and comes from a different part of your brain that has no access to your voluntary muscles this explains your ambivalence towards binge eating part of you really wants to stop um but part of you feels like it wants to binge eat the part of you that wants to stop is the real you the part that says binge eat can be dismissed you have total control over your voluntary movements and nothing no thought feeling or sensation can make you binge

eat. Again, let's go back to all binges are caused by the urge to binge. Let's do a thinking exercise. Think about shaving your head right now. Really think about it. Try to let that thought move your hands. No matter how much you try to convince yourself to shave your head, your hands probably haven't moved an inch because you actually don't want to shave your head and you actually don't want to binge eat either. But you get tricked into thinking you do by thinking that your thoughts or that thoughts that encourage binge eating have meaning or significance. If you can accept with a hundred percent commitment that you never want to binge eat and that all thoughts feelings and sensations telling you to binge eat are garbage things become a lot easier except that

you have total control nothing can make you binge eat especially not mere thoughts you are not powerless okay and binge eating is honestly nothing more than a really bad habit um how your binge eating habit started doesn't really matter because now it's wired into your brain your cravings to binge are just generated neurological impulses to carry out a habit in the same way that your urge to brush your teeth at night is from the same process there's no greater meaning to your binges recognize the cue for the habit okay so like maybe it comes from restriction maybe it comes from high emotion maybe it comes from the munchies and the reward aka food the relief from the craving can um by recognizing that it can give you the space you need to stop

immediately acting on the habit okay um but i do think that people feel like they're people feel like they are out of control when they binge eat but you are in way more control than you think it really is just understanding your triggers and understanding what relief sensation you want it to bring such as oh I am having a high emotional moment so I want to eat a lot of food and that's going to relax me you have to understand that sequence of events that triggers you and then when you are feeling that way you have to understand that yes you are in control of your body you are in control of your mind and you do have a choice in the matter and you can fill it with something that is good for you whether a good food a different habit um just distracting

yourself whatever it may be you can do it but i do think the best thing you can do for yourself is get back into normal eating you need to neutralize food the single greatest thing you can do for your mental and physical well-being um is to not let food have so much power over you so stop treating food like a drug a medicine like an unstoppable force like your reason for living it's a donut okay it's pasta you can eat it and the universe will not explode you can also not eat it and likewise you'll be fine the importance and power you give to food creates stress and causes you to obsess over it should i should i eat it should i not over and over and over debating in your head as if your decision will cause like world war three it's not that high stakes okay

no other inanimate object likely causes you this much stress think of food in the same way you have also neutralize food obsession normal people are not thinking about food all day outside of their meals they get hungry but they don't treat hunger as an emergency um it's just a sensation that doesn't need to be immediately satisfied if you find yourself anxiously waiting for your next meal or obsessing fantasizing one don't judge yourself two accept that they're there and don't try to get rid of them and three don't get so wrapped up in them so this is kind of like just mindfulness meditation which is just understanding your thoughts giving them room to be thoughts and then letting go of them these thoughts are no different than thoughts about binge eating

neutralizing these thoughts and not letting them have power over you will allow you to move on and get back to what you are doing also you need to eat normally you need two to three meals a day okay maybe some snacks eat when you're hungry stop when you're full it sounds simple but um sometimes it for me it used to feel impossible to do but now that I've gotten it more into a routine it is a lot easier than you might think and keeping yourself full will also help you avoid these binging moments so neutralize food in your life all food is important none has no food has higher meaning over the other neutralize it the way you think about it keep yourself fed if you understand your triggers it'll help you control your binge eating but also understand that you

are in control of your thoughts you are more powerful than you think you are you're amazing you're brilliant you will get through this and I love you hopefully these tips can have kind of helped you understand but I feel like when I was in my binge eating kind of phase it was caused mostly because I was like oh my god I cannot wait to eat this huge meal it's gonna bring me so much peace and I'm gonna just binge out and also I was high so that kind of pushed it a little bit because it gave me less control over my thoughts and once I understood that those two things are my triggers such as like being high and then emotional eating I whenever I feel this binge eating come on I sit down I ask myself where is this stemming from what do I actually need

why was this caused what do I truly want in this moment and hey sometimes I want to eat a donut and that is valid and I should be able to do that but also sometimes I just need to eat three meals a day and keep myself fed all day and eat healthily eat good eat some snacks keep my mind on a healthy balanced in order for me to keep my thoughts on a healthy balance as well i love you you'll get through this you're amazing you're beautiful love you oh my god someone said my boyfriend cheated on me i'm freaking out how to get over it please you don't get over it what you have what happened and everything you're feeling is very real and valid and that anger and that hurt is real and valid and you shouldn't try and demean it in any sort of way you also shouldn't let your well should

be ex-partner demean it in any way you should break up with that person immediately because that will reinforce you being on your side you standing up for yourself it will give you more power in the situation it will also make you feel more confident in yourself for feeling that hurt and understanding that your partner betrayed you and understanding that that goes against your morals and your beliefs and standing up for what you deserve and what you truly need that will reinforce your confidence um break up with him immediately and then yeah understand it really is not your fault 100 not your fault i don't care what they say that man is a piece of shit he broke the most sacred trust that you could possibly have within a relationship and you just got to

keep moving forward you i really think you just need to leave him immediately feel all the anger and hurt let it out release it scream cry do whatever you need to do cuss him out literally do what you need to do don't go to jail leave that man move on into your better life but if you stay here in this place and you think you can get over it i really don't think that's a real thing i don't think you can get over especially when you are betrayed so intimately I I don't think your partner after betraying you like that deserves a second chance at all like cheating is cheating you knew this was wrong you did it anyways I don't care how drunk you were I don't care what was going on you know you know you know you shouldn't be doing that and you did it and guess what they

ruined it for themselves you did everything right you're probably an amazing girlfriend you're a beautiful smart funny you don't deserve that stand up for yourself keep moving forward and understand that's not everybody I feel like after people get cheated on they kind of then put up a wall and they don't believe they're like they don't want to get back into love because they don't want to get hurt again not everybody will hurt you this man's a piece of shit and if you stick around you're gonna keep getting hurt so move forward build that confidence and trust in yourself tell this man to fuck off keep believing in love don't let it kill your spirit but i love you you're amazing i'm so sorry this happened to you you have to leave this man though

someone said how to stop comparing my looks with other girls because they're so gorgeous here's the thing we as humans are so incredible and beautiful and amazing because we are all so vastly different even if you're an identical twin you can still tell them apart there's still something that makes them them and that's what makes humans so beautiful and amazing so what makes you you stands alone and stands strong with what makes somebody else somebody else and that quality doesn't take away from you that quality doesn't demean you in any way it just means you're different and beauty comes in so many different shapes and forms and sizes and just because someone looks different than you doesn't mean they are quote-unquote better quote-unquote hotter

beauty can look like so many different things and you should appreciate the vast different kinds of beauty that there are in the world and you can appreciate other people's beauty without comparing yourself to them because like listen I am not like a skinny twig supermodel six foot girly I will never be that but that doesn't mean I'm not beautiful I'm beautiful in a different way but also that doesn't mean they're not beautiful they're beautiful in a different way because they're beautiful in a way that I could never be the same way I'm beautiful in a way that they could never be it doesn't take away from each other it doesn't demean each other in any sort of way we both stand strong as beautiful women in this world and that is what

makes humans so freaking amazing and fantastic how gorgeous we can be how different we can be how just like individualized we are that is what true beauty is so no it doesn't take away from you and I feel like switching that mindset in your head that comparison mindset where it's like oh well she looks beautiful so I don't that you gotta cut that thought off before it even happens and when I find myself comparing people or myself in that sort of way a great tip is you need to immediately give that person four compliments three compliments a compliment whatever it is and give yourself a compliment whether it's externally internally you need to compliment both yourself and the person you're comparing yourself to and that will kind of in your brain

neutralize that thought and reinforce the idea that you know their beauty is valid but also so is yours and both can exist on the same plane at the same level and that is valid you know but i love you you are beautiful you are gorgeous stop comparing yourself to other people it's not fair to you or the other people and when you are having this thought process cut it out as soon as you feel it give a compliment to that person give a compliment to yourself keep trucking along you're beautiful you're gorgeous don't demean yourself you know someone said glow up tips just being more confident and radiating good vibes so there's this little host at my work and she's so freaking cute she's adorable my friend came into my work

to like have a drink before she went out for the night and give me something to do at my bar because I was bored so she was hanging out and she was chit-chatting with the little host and the host leaves and she was like you know she is just like glowing she's radiant like that girl's gonna do well in life and there's nothing like specific you can really put your finger on except for she is just a thousand percent herself she is so fun to be around because she is herself she doesn't deny herself she knows who she is she's confident in that and it radiates outwardly and i feel like that is the true kind of glow that people look for when they think of the quote unquote glow up you're not like i need a bbl um and liposuction that's gonna be my glow up no

because you're still gonna probably hate yourself if you don't combat those thoughts internally just because you look good externally doesn't mean you look good internally or putting out good energy externally so you really need to focus on more about how you feel about yourself rather than your external looks do you know what I mean stop basing who you are as a person on your external looks and start basing who you are as a person in your confidence your understanding and the peace you find in yourself because that will radiate and it will draw people towards you so I think the biggest thing you can really do for a true and real glow up is to start to get to know yourself you're like but that's the most terrifying thing like i can go to the gym that's

easy i don't want to get to know myself well girl i don't know what to tell you sometimes life's hard sometimes you got to know who you are but take yourself like out on dates do little journal prompts with yourself i put a lot of these on my patreon like if you want to get to know yourself i do a lot of journal prompts we do affirmations i just uploaded some um like identity crisis worksheets if you really have no idea where to start but I do think true confidence and that like glow that people think of comes from people knowing who they are and standing by it so a you got to get to know yourself what do you like to do what are your hobbies what do you dislike okay what do you hate what are your morals what are your values um what are your good habits what

are your bad habits what draws um what what do you get drawn to what is drawn towards you what do you like to wear this all comes from trial and error by the way you gotta try things on they don't fit take them off not literally but also literally like you know try out different food if you don't like it that's okay at least you tried but you have to kind of have this like scientific era of you just being like who am i what do i like let's go out into the world and try it out or let's do some internal work and do some journaling do some worksheets oh my god literally the way we are adults and have homework on getting to know ourselves this should be kindergarten things anyways don't get me started but get to know yourself take yourself out on

dates try on new clothes try on new styles cut your hair if you want to like anything you can do to get to know yourself do that step two stand by how you feel after you discover what you like you need to stand by it stand by those morals stand by those values don't let anybody get in the way of how you truly feel and what you truly want stand by what you want to do where you want to go how you want to feel do not let other people walk all over you do not let yourself turn away from what you truly want that in turn will cause you to feel more secure in yourself and in turn will make you feel more confident in yourself because you have built trust within yourself okay once you have that like confidence that trust that security with yourself which is the

most important person to build security with to build trust with you will be glowing you'll be glowing fucking outward appearance you know we are all who we are and that's amazing that's beautiful but true that true glow that people think of are people who know who they are they understand that and they show up for who they are that's the kind of people that really just like glow and radiate through the world those are the kind of people that like I'm attracted to and like want to be around because they teach me amazing lessons they show me new ways of thinking and also if you are not there yet that's okay that doesn't mean you're never gonna get there it just means today's the day to start. You know, it's never too late. Always, always, always you have

time. You have time to get to know yourself, to figure yourself out. It is never too late and you are constantly going to be learning new things about yourself. So lean into that. Life is all about discovery and you're never going to stop learning. So keep learning, keep changing, keep growing. Stand by yourself, stand by your morals. Don't leave yourself in the past. Don't leave yourself in the dust pick yourself up off the ground dust yourself off carry on forward I love you everybody can glow up everybody can it's never too late I promise someone asked good smoke spots legal because we can't smoke at our apartment complex that is a very normal thing unfortunately like even though I live in a legal state my last apartment like I could not smoke inside like I

smoked a bowl inside once and it was a big like complex like if I smoked inside with the windows open I don't think anybody else around me would probably be able to smell it but as soon as I smoked like five minutes later I got an email being like hey residents just a reminder you cannot smoke weed in this building and if you do we're gonna fine you a lot of money and I was like oh oh good to know great to know so when I lived there a lot of the times I would smoke pre-rolls but I would use it as a moment to like go walk around like I would go walk around my neighborhood not really at night that wasn't the vibe it was just like during the middle of the day or like after work around like five six then I would go for a little walk put my little tennis shoes on

get my little pre-roll set up and then just get outside and that was honestly really nice um it got me moving it got me outside kind of got me a new perspective i gotta smoke my joint in peace go upstairs chill you know i feel like that's kind of the best way to do it parks are a great idea not parks with children like big empty parks away from the kiddos um you can always i guess smoke in your car just don't leave it running because then I think that technically makes it illegal I don't know I literally smoked in my car this morning with my friend but keep the car off roll the windows down chill in your car do your thing there um and also during the winter I would just put a box fan in my window with the with the it blowing out obviously and then I would like smoke

a little bowl or like a dab and I would blow it into the box fan and have it blow directly out of my apartment and that I feel like was very very safe that was a very safe option and it never smelled if I had to smoke inside you know what I mean like oh my god just snowed six feet outside I'm not going out there like this is desperate times box fan in the window blow it outside you'll be good love you someone said turns me on when my boyfriend cries what's wrong with me lol it's probably because he's like showing emotion you're like that's kind of sexy like that's kind of hot he's like showing emotion now it is a little fucked up because he's probably like going through something and does not want to be sexualized in that moment but i also like i

get it women get turned on like I feel like men get turned on it's like physical attraction am I seeing something sexy hot right now that's literally it women it's like more complex like emotions can turn us on acts of kindness acts of service can turn us on like it's a and like obviously physical things as well but I feel like it's kind of less physical and more mental so I feel like this is a valid feeling but also like if he's crying over his dead cat i don't think this is the time to fuck him unless he needs a great distraction then go for it but i get it valid someone asked how to get over the fear of people thinking i'm conceited because i'm posting a lot girl fuck what they think it literally the only thing that matters is what you think it's

your social media if they don't want to follow you they can unfollow you if they want to talk about you behind their back cool go ahead that just means you know they're kind of like just mean girls you've got to really just focus on who you are what you enjoy and then share that to the world I mean that's what I've been doing and like sure I'm some I'm sure some people from high school are like lol look at her but who gives a fuck honestly like that's more embarrassing for them than it is for me because I'm having a great time I've built this amazing community I am so fulfilled and happy through this like creatively I'm having so much fun I'm making some good money and they're mad talking about me behind my back like in the grand scheme of things

I'm chilling I'm chilling so if people if you're worried about what other people think you really got to focus it back on you do I enjoy posting this am I having a good time also if there's people who are following you that you're afraid of them doing that girl just take measures into your own hand and go ahead and just block them or go ahead and just unfollow them so they can't see you like I have my whole family blocked on Instagram because it's like this is for the girls you know this is not a family Instagram like I share with my family what I want to share but also like this is not like a this is not like a family fun Facebook account you know I'm sharing this with my girls I'm being myself I'm being a little weird a little fun

a little creative and that's for who I want to share it with um and if they happen to find it and they want to talk about me behind my back then like sure go ahead who fucking cares you know I'm having a great time that's really all that matters you got to refocus how you're thinking about it fuck what other people think how do you feel end of story someone asked how do you aggressively humble a man you treat them as if they don't exist men when they want attention they will go to any depths or any lengths to get attention and if you feed into that whether if you're like this is revenge or not it's going to feed right back into their ego the best thing you can do to truly get revenge on a man or to kind of aggressively humble them is to act as if they don't exist

like at all block them delete their number ignore ignore ignore like even if you see them in public oh hey like who are you what's your name again like literally crazy shit like pretend that they do not exist that is the foolproof proof way of aggressively humbling them because their ego is so big whether if you're like well i'm gonna sleep with their friend and get back at them well guess what then that fuels their fire and then they're gonna be even more aggressive or crazy because now they have a game plan of how to get back at you maybe they're gonna sleep with your friend or like maybe you're like well I'm gonna do this it doesn't matter it doesn't matter the best thing you can do is literally block ignore pretend they do not exist at all it'll protect

your peace you will feel so much better and also you will be on the higher playing ground and there's no way that they can really get back at you pretend what they do doesn't matter to you pretend they don't exist pretend they were never born pretend you never met them best way someone said let's talk about how social media is overrun by consumerism that part i feel like people are now realizing they can make a lot of money off of social media and it is just like insane like i can't even get on tiktok because every other video is like tiktok shop shop my tiktok link here buy this thing buy this thing bitch I don't give a fuck I don't have money to buy things with I just want to watch silly little videos that's what I came here for to dissociate I don't want to buy

things now if it's like an Amazon product that's how I feel if it's like a small creator I'm like okay I'll give you like you know like vibes you were trying to hustle you're trying to do your thing amazing but all these like big fucking ads the TikTok shop oh my god it is so fucking annoying and honestly it's kind of just what I needed because it's pushing me away from social media a little bit at least my usage not usage in a way of like creativity creatively but like my usage in a way of I'm just gonna get on my phone and scroll for six hours like I can't do that anymore because I just get like overwhelmed by the amount of amount of ads and the urge to spend money oh it is so annoying and it's really pushing me back into the real world which honestly

I think is good and if you are having that urge listen to it not the spending money urge the getting off your phone urge if you're like this is just fucking annoying at this point it probably is because it's annoying and you need to get on an app that's or like get back into the real world that's not gonna have that many ads I love Pinterest for that reason and uh Tumblr Tumblr it has ads but it's like the worst ads ever because no one wants to buy ad placement on the app like no one wants to there's like three companies that do it which is fantastic um I feel like tumblr is a very ad-free safe space and pinterest is it'll recommend you products but it's really just based on what you were looking at um and I feel like it's more of a

creative app for me personally but yeah tiktok I'm like this place fucking sucks because of all the ads oh my god and honestly I hope companies can realize that this is going to be their downfall and we can kind of turn away from it and we can get back into having fun again but these are the things when you're having this realization this internal conflict like oh my god this app sucks and I'm just on it too much I'm spending too much money on here when you realize these things listen to them distance yourself make changes that better your life love you someone said I'm dating a guy who has zero hobbies is this bad I'm a big hobby girly and he's not so I feel like it can't it can be good or bad I dated a man who had zero hobbies which means I was his hobby and then if I wanted

to do anything else he got mad at me because I was supposed to take up all his time and that was just not healthy for me because he put way too much of an emphasis on me and didn't let me have my alone time now if this person you know doesn't have any hobbies but also like encourages you and doesn't demean you then I think it can be a healthy thing like maybe he just works and then likes to do nothing after work like I feel like that's very valid a lot of people like to do that but also I am now in a relationship where I have a lot of hobbies and also my partner has a lot of hobbies and it is a breath of fresh air because he will be like okay I'm gonna go do my hobby and I'm like oh yeah that's a great reminder I want to do my hobby and this is giving me free

time to go do this and then also he understands how hard they are he understands how much encouragement you need so he is willing to give that and I don't know opposites do attract and they can work but I think it is just so refreshing to have a partner who is like has goals has hobbies has different things that they like to do likes to expand their creativity expand their mind expand their skills likes to pick up new things because i am such a like i have adhd like girl i gotta be doing four things at once constantly so if i'm doing that i need someone who's gonna at least understand that and having a partner who does understand that is a game changer so whether they do have hobbies or not as long as they support you understand you and uplift you through

it all that's all that matters someone said you talked about selling your soul before yes i did that was a fun episode do you believe in a quote-unquote real devil well i don't believe in a quote-unquote real god so i don't think i can believe in a quote-unquote real devil no hate to those who do like vibes do your thing um but i feel like with one comes the other and then they don't believe in one the other doesn't exist but i do believe in good and evil and energy exchanges of the both and i think people can become consumed by evil but i don't think there is like a deity of evil if that makes sense um i feel like it is something that ebbs and flows and people can be consumed by it people can get rid of it people people can be consumed by good

people can be consumed by bad um but the whole deity thing no i don't really believe in that I do believe in like energies and energy exchanges though. It's midterm week, you guys. And I know you guys are stressed to all my baddies in school. Stay strong, power through. You're amazing. You will get through this. I promise you.

Someone asked, midterm week, how do I stay sane on top of school and fighting off the impending seasonal depression? Illy, love you. Okay, so here's the thing. Let me be real with you guys. College, especially midterm season and final season, is not meant to be easy. So if you are struggling or having a hard time, this is very normal. The more years you go through it, you will get used to it and fall into a healthier routine. but if you're like a freshman or sophomore I understand if there's like high anxiety it's a marathon okay and marathons I think about marathon runners it's not meant to be easy it's not meant to be like a walk in the park it's meant to be a multi-mile mind fuck and you have to stay strong through it all you might trip and fall you might scrape a knee you got to get up you got to keep

going you got to power through the finish line will get closer with every step you take so just focus on taking the next step and the next step and the next step and getting to that finish line and crossing it crossing that finish line is the only thing that matters okay wake up in the morning eat a good meal that is very important I know that's hard when you're a college student I'm talking a bowl of oatmeal I'm talking go to the dining hall and get eggs and bacon and some pancakes and study while you're at the dining hall eat something in the morning it's important you have to keep your brain fed you gotta keep your brain fed three meals a day get some snacks in there okay if you aren't taking care of yourself your brain won't be able to take care

of itself especially if you're not eating food if you are not getting enough sleep your brain will not be able to memorize all these things this was like the first thing I learned in my like neuroscience class it was you need sleep sleep is just as important as a memory tool as like flashcards are if your brain doesn't have time to rest it won't have time to like remember and build these memories and build these neurological connections so you gotta get eight hours okay I don't care if you're sleeping from 7 till whatever or you're going to bed later or earlier. 8 hours minimum maximum, okay? You have to rest.

You have to feed yourself. Everything else is just a hustle and you got to hustle through it and you will be rewarded, I promise you. You'll get to the other side. You will be able to have some fun, to have some rest, but it is a marathon sprint. and you just got to focus on every step that is ahead of you or the step that you need to take next and before you know it you'll be at the finish line i promise you you got this you're gonna do amazing okay remember c's get degrees all you gotta do is try your best do your best ask for help if you need feed yourself get some rest you'll get through it i promise you love you

someone said what's going on the universe hannah everything is chaotic and out of line Yeah, that's because we're in an eclipse season right now. And the eclipse season is really, really putting an emphasis on our interpersonal relationships and our relationships with ourselves because it is in Libra. We're also in Scorpio season. We just entered Scorpio season, I believe, question mark. I know at least Mars and or Mercury entered Scorpio yesterday so people's emotions are a little heightened but we're also kind of focusing inward a little bit more people are focusing more on themselves right now and what they want what they want out of themselves they want out of their relationships just making them a little bit crazy a little bit cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs and that's valid that's okay if you feel like you are going a little bit crazy there during this time that's all right these feelings these high emotions that you're having are valid um and

they're something that you need to figure out with yourself rather than putting on other people to figure out so also if you feel like other people are like stressing you out or like putting their emotions on you this is not a time for you to take those on you really need to be focusing inward and asking yourself, what do I want? Where do I want to go? What kind of interpersonal relationships do I want to build? What do I want my relationships to look like? What do I want my relationships with myself to look like? And really just focus on that. Don't focus on the outside world. Don't focus on any stress people are putting on you. If people are being a little crazy, eclipse season, ride it off. Keep on moving forward. Keep on pushing. I believe in you.

don't let moodiness overcome you don't let high negative emotion overcome you it is very easy to get kind of I don't know swept away by these emotions because they are so overcoming but that's not who you are you deserve peace love happiness seek the light out in the darkness love you someone said I can't clean my room it's really bad and it's too overwhelming first of all don't start cleaning in a time where you're tired such as like you just got off a huge shift or about you're about to go to a huge shift okay wait until you have like some downtime okay this is how I clean too when I feel like it's too overwhelming I wait for me to have some downtime which is gonna be today because like because I finally have a day off I'm like okay bitch we got to get this

shit done so I wait so I have some time where I'm like okay this is not like gonna impede on my energy for other things this is like my one goal for the day then well for me personally I like to get a little stony a little high helps me dissociate a little bit and just kind of get into the groove of things I like to turn on a good playlist maybe a podcast turn on this podcast okay use it as motivation something to play in the background so it cancels out the thoughts of like oh my god this sucks i hate cleaning i hate cleaning this sucks this sucks i hate cleaning like you need something to be focusing on so you're not focusing on your negative thoughts of hating cleaning and then what you're gonna do is you are going to a you need to get like a bowl

or a basket this is going to be like your adhd basket this is going to be the i don't know where this goes or at least doesn't go in this area so i'm going to put it in this basket and i'm going to handle it at the end of cleaning this is your anti-distraction basket okay if you pick up like a lip gloss off on the floor and you're like this goes my purse downstairs but i'm not going to run downstairs and put it in my purse because it's going to deter me from cleaning or it's going to break this kind of flow that i'm in put it in the basket random t-shirt put it in the basket mismatched sock put it in the basket uh trash i mean maybe bring a trash can around with you as well. Trash can, ADHD basket, boom, you're good to go. Okay, next, you are going to go clockwise

throughout your room. You're not going to bounce from one wall to the other, to the other, to this corner, to under your bed, to in your closet. No, you are going to start in one corner, I don't care where, wherever, maybe the easiest, start easy, and you're going to work clockwise throughout your room and you are not going to stop until you get back to the point that you started start in one corner move your way to the next put the random things that you don't know where they go in your basket put the trash in the trash bag keep moving and you start with one corner one area move clockwise throughout it I guarantee you will be done before you know it but that's kind of my tips for like deep cleaning getting through it if you need like glass cleaner or Febreze or whatever

kind of like deep cleaning things that you need in your room new sheets new bedding put that in your room beforehand so it's there to source from so you don't have to like go downstairs or go somewhere else and get distracted and then get off your flow keep them in your room so you're ready to do it whenever you need. Keep maybe a laundry basket in there, a trash bag, and then your little ADHD bowl. Now at the very end, once you finish going clockwise and you have your bowl full of your random things, that's your last step. Put those away where they need to go, whether it's trash, whether it's dirty laundry, whether it's home, the place it needs to be, that's your last thing. Boom. Done. Room clean. You got it. Once you clean your room, your mind will be so much

clear it feels so good this is a great self-care tool as well if you feel like your life's gotten a little bit out of control and you want to regain some control deep cleaning is a fantastic tool for this same way like cooking can be you're going to do something for yourself that is ultimately going to better yourself and the more you persevere through it and get to that finish point the stronger your independence and your confidence in yourself will be i love you someone asked favorite hair care products for split ends a girl needs it so i cut my hair like two years ago for that first year it did not grow at all it was not growing and i was panicking because i used to have like long luscious hair like down to my ass and i cut it all off and i was like oh my god it

won't grow what the fuck is going on i'm panicking i need my long hair back a quit it with the heat no more heat i used to do these big 70s barrel curls every single day holy shit it was killing my hair it was frying it stop it with the heat put a little claw clip in don't use tight hair bands that's gonna snap your hair especially if it's dry and brittle and thin okay claw clip put it up don't touch it don't mess with it don't use heat the only thing i use heat on is my bangs or the occasional time, like once a month that I will straighten it. Don't use heat. Next. Okay. Eat protein. You need to eat protein. Protein is so important for like your skin, your hair, your nails. Protein is going to keep your hair growing. It's going to keep it healthy. It's

going to keep it thick. Okay. I think like fish, salmon, anything with high like omega oils, really good for you next the bread hair oil I deep oil my hair once a week okay I'm talking I take this thing is like half empty this is my second bottle of the bread hair oil it is fantastic I take like 10 drops I slather only the ends I do this in the morning then I'll claw clip it up and I'll leave it in all day this will help like protect my hair it'll help strengthen it it'll help soften it it'll oil it it'll help like repair or smooth down split ends it is so fucking fantastic it smells like fruit loops oh my god I get so many compliments when I oil my hair because people are like what's that smell like is it perfume no it's my hair oil and it smells amazing

it's not like essential oils that are going to dry your hair out it is like a very natural amazing smell very soft subtle sweet I love the bread hair oil and also like I understand I have thin white girl hair it works well for that but also it is made for like more curly thick hair so I think any any hair type can use it like absolutely anybody so if you need a little moisturizer little nutrients in your hair the bread hair oil next trim your split ends i know you're like hannah that i don't want to cut my hair like i want it to grow long i know but if you don't cut your split ends it's going to keep splitting and splitting and splitting all the way up that hair shaft until it breaks completely in half and then your hair is going to fall out

so cut it before it splits all the way up the hair strand trim a little cute little couple centimeters works whatever is needed sometimes i'm bored and i will like take chunks of my hair and like look through each strand individually for the split end and trim them i know that's fucking crazy but like sometimes i have a lot of time on my hands and i'm like well whatever it's better than scrolling on my phone you know what i mean trim your split ends before they split completely moisturize oil them eat your protein avoid heat what else I think that's pretty much it I think if you stick to those I don't know that's what I've been sticking to and I my hair has grown like four or five inches in the past six months which compared to the no growth that's

pretty good in my opinion oh my god I just listened back to a majority of this podcast my nails are so long that it keeps like i keep accidentally tapping on my phone and it's picking it up and i'm so sorry if that's so fucking annoying i really apologize maybe it's a cute little asmr moment i'm about to get new nails these are a little too long and grown out i'm trying to make them last past halloween because girls i don't know what i'm gonna be for halloween and i'm panicking i'm going to a rave but i also want to be like a little slutty but i don't want to be like hot i don't want to be like oh i don't know what to do i don't know what to do and i'm a little bit panicking i'm gonna have to go to spirit halloween today do some shopping but i'm hoping

these nails last me through halloween because i love this cherry red color the bloody mary red it's the perfect red and i'll probably do this color again but i do need a new set and i cannot wait to get them i'm getting them like october 2nd oh they're gonna be so good my nail lady is so fucking talented having a good nail lady especially if you like getting your nails done like I guess I never got my lashes done but I'm sure it's the same thing as having like a good lash lady or a good hair lady it is a game changer oh my god being able to just like chit chat have a little laugh and then leave with amazing fucking nails wow life-changing so good great investment someone asked what's your experience with canna style I've been considering buying from them

I smoke from my can of style bong every single day it's very easy to clean it's a hearty piece of um like glass like it's big and thick and meant to last and also like I wasn't sure because it's like hand painted and it's like a little puff paint too I was worried that maybe it was gonna chip or break off or like it wouldn't stay on and I've had this bong for like a year and a half two years and it is it looks brand new like as long as I keep it clean it looks brand new it works perfect it's amazing 10 out of 10 out of 10 out of 10 canna style is one of my favorite like weed companies or like weed brands to buy from especially for like pieces good investments and bongs or pipes or like fun things they have some really really fun stuff i think they just

like released a fairy forest line which is like fucking adorable they have this crystal ball bong that i am dying to get and i think i might invest in soon so then there's only like two companies that like i trust in when it comes to like weedish stuff the first one is canistyle the second one is as you guys know paz packs i love paz packs i love cbd especially supplementing or like a little gummy um and it's an amazing tool for tea breaks it's amazing supplement for like anxiety um any sort of stressor i love cbd and pazpax is the only company that i trust but yeah pazpax canna style those are my go-to for like anything that i possibly need also quick plug if you want to try out pazpax in any sort of sense some pre-rolls flour gummies um any sort

of CBD products that they have you can use code smoke sesh for 10% off I love you anyways I love you guys I think this is the end of our podcast I know I know but my brain is starting to fail I've been up since 7 30 you're like girl that's nothing I know but I'm not used to it okay my brain is struggling a little bit right now I'm gonna go eat the rest of my breakfast I'm gonna to go chill it's a pretty rainy chill gloomy day and I'm really feeling the vibes I think I'm going to go deep clean my house maybe do some baking I'm going to do a little photo shoot so follow me on Instagram if you want to see that at Hannah Marlene also on Instagram if you want a baby tea before the pre-orders close okay pre-orders will close on Friday Friday you have until Friday to

order your baby tea the link is in my instagram bio at hannah marlene um also if you haven't received your baby tea yet that's a very normal the people who have just live a little closer to me they should all from the first shipment they should all be there at least by friday if not feel free to email me my email is in my instagram bio but yeah if you want to support get a little baby tea i've seen so many pictures of you guys in them and they are just you guys look adorable they all look amazing on you I think you are all loving them follow the care instructions at the beginning of the podcast as I guys as I told you guys you know wash on cool flip on side out when you're washing and also um just don't dry it you'll be good to go but I love you all so much

I hope you have a fantastic rest of your week stay strong okay midterm week is hard I understand you guys are feeling the burnout I understand you're feeling the chaos with the eclipse season this is a time to stay strong and stand by yourself stand by what you're feeling stand by what you like what you dislike stand by your morals stand by your values don't let the chaos interrupt your the peace of your inner world stay strong focus on not only your mind but your body and what they both need we will get through this i love you and i can't wait to see you next week