Smoke Sesh - celibacy, identity crisis, managing anxiety & dating a baddie

Episode Date: October 17, 2023

Happy Tuesday hotties I’m so excited to be back with another episode of smoke sesh, today is a fun episode as I’ve had a lot of caffeine and I’ve got a lot of thoughts going on. We start off chatting on what I’ve been up to! Taking advantage of the season and fall activities, we celebrate not being pregnant, setting up new routines, bad habits, getting rid of that guy whose breaking your boundaries, sensitive and insecure in a relationship, current go to hot coffee, Brazilian wax baddies, how to keep the spark alive, managing anxiety, the fuck around phase, saying I love you, what do I want to be? lover girl not in a relationship, rotting girl hours and how to really enjoy a self care day, bar hopping, bongs vs joints, enjoying giving oral, identity crisis and what to do, birth chart readings, fixing a bong, dating a baddie is not for the weak, letting go of that lame man, celibacy and decentering men from your life, and finally what’s going on in the stars and the current eclipse we are under. I love you all sooooo much thank you for being here thank you for being you and I’ll see you all next Tuesday! MUAH!

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash. So come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life. The good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing, I've got a story for it all. Good morning hotties of the world. i am so excited to be back for another episode of smoke sesh gonna hang out with you guys a little bit it is a bright and beautiful tuesday morning i'm gonna hang out with you guys smoke

a little bit pull myself together i'm gonna go get some pho this afternoon with my boyfriend so it's gonna be a good day safe to say um i have been so busy recently i woke up the other day my boyfriend's like okay get ready we're into the pumpkin patch we went to the pumpkin patch gotten a little hayride dressed up took photos it was so freaking cute if there's a pumpkin patch near you even if it's not near you like ours was 45 minutes away go to it have some fun bring your friends pick out a little pumpkin carve it get into the holiday spirit it really helps with kind of making winter a little bit more enjoyable that's why a majority of our holidays are during the winter it's so we can get through it so do a little celebrating you know i had a blast it was

so fun even though it was cold and windy you got to make the most out of it um did that me and my friend had a little girls day the other day we went out for the farmer's market we smoked a little weed we went to happy hour had some espresso martinis um and then we ended up at a winery which was so freaking fun we did a little wine tasting got some ciders hung out amongst the vines so pretty I used to go to wineries a lot when I was a kid because my parents went to wineries a lot especially like our neighbors and stuff that would be like the meeting place so I couldn't drink obviously but they're getting fucked up and I would be just like playing tag in the in the winery like in between the vines so that was a little nostalgic for me I got to show her like

my hometown since she's not from here um and yeah that was so fun I have been puzzling really getting into the local activities for fall and oh also all the t-shirts they will all be shipped out tomorrow i have officially hot pressed all of them i'm getting them packaged up tonight and then yeah they will be shipped off to you guys i'm so fucking excited for you guys to get these t-shirts and see all you hotties in them you guys are gonna look fucking amazing and also if you missed the last drop don't worry there is going to be another restock before the month is over so follow me on instagram at hannah marlene if you want to know when the restock is or when to get your hands on them all the updates will be there but i need to get these out first and they should be out at

least by tonight so that is so fucking exciting oh and the most exciting thing that's happened to me in the past week which literally i know i'm getting older because i could have cried happy tears I got a washer and dryer literally I got a washer and dryer and it is making me so incredibly happy which is so odd I never thought I'd be so excited to do laundry but like doing laundry in a laundry mat or like having to take it over to my parents or like even have laundry even having like laundry in the basement of your building like my last building was on the fourth floor so I'd have to drag my laundry down to the basement use the communal washers drag it all the way back up um I've had to use like laundry mats or my parents um but oh my god it is just

such a hassle having to drag your laundry everywhere and now I feel like I'm living like a queen because I can open my closet door and literally just put my laundry in there and get to work and it is such a nice feeling I feel like I'm actually living in a full home you know I got it all decorated I have it all organized but the laundry machine and the dryer that really was the cherry on top so I'm so excited for that I think this Thursday on the Patreon for my Patreon girlies hi love you thank you for hanging out with me every single day um I'm gonna do a house tour on the Patreon so if you're interested in my apartment how I decorate where I've gotten my stuff from um feel free to join I will be doing a full tour I just got this beautiful 19 probably

like 80s i would say mid-century modern-ish fan chair that is like cheetah print to match my vanity i got that i got my washer and dryer yesterday and after that i feel like my home's complete and i'm ready to do a full home tour so if you want to see that follow the patreon any more updates not that i can think of i know what you're here for let's get into all of your deepest darkest questions see what the collective is thinking for the week huh love you all righty someone said as soon as i thought i was pregnant my period came there's a little heart emoji after that so congrats girl congrats i am so happy for you literally once a month this happens as a girl i feel like this is just what you kind of go through um you're like oh my god when was last

time I have my period I have no idea now I'm panicking I have to be pregnant like there's no other choice and then like as soon as I have that thought or feeling I usually get my period that night like as soon as I start panicking like oh my god wait a minute when was my last period what's going on am I pregnant as soon as I have that thought like something in my body triggers the floodgates to open and boom my period comes so congrats on not being pregnant love that for you this is a great one how do you motivate slash discipline yourself setting a new routine letting go of bad habits etc so first of all i think you really need to dare to dream and i say this a lot you're like hannah i spend all my time in my head like i've been dreaming okay great but if you have

not thought about yourself in a while like sit down write down like who you want to be what kind of habits you want to take on and like as many as you can possibly think of because this will be like the place that you pull the new habits, new routines, new ideas from. So you have to have like a source. So dream a little bit, come up with ideas, come up with things, do a little like writing exercise where you envision yourself in five years. What does she look like? What does she do? Where is she living? I feel like this is a great way to get a basis of where you want to go. or you can also write down such as like if you have bad habits um write down all your bad habits like all of them do like a little brain dump um of all the things that you kind of have an issue with

what you do that will be your source that you're gonna pull from and then you simply have to start with one the brain dump is for you to source from in the future but you're not going to be able to get all those things done at once like you are not going to envision yourself from five years from now and then step into that person tomorrow that's simply not going to happen it's going to be gradual it's going to take time and you simply have to start with one thing so start with something easy start with something simple you don't have to start with the hardest thing because that's probably going to discourage you from continuing so it's okay to start easy or simpler um something that will get you to dip your toes in the water so then you can kind of understand

okay this is how i build a new habit or this is how i cut out a new habit or this is how i add to my routine. Let's move forward from here. So I also just genuinely think everybody needs a planner or like a wall calendar of some sort. I know people use Google calendars, Apple calendars, whatever it may be. You need a source that's easy for you to use. It's exciting for you to use that you can kind of sit down, plan, understand the scope and the time that you have and setting goals according to the time that you have and physically writing them down and physically crossing them out crossing shit off my to-do list literally gives me a fucking like girl boner like honestly like it is so satisfying and then i cross something off and i'm like okay what's next like

what what else do i have to do what can i add to my list so i can cross something off physically taking a black marker and crossing that shit off feels so good to the human brain because you know you have done that completed it now you can move on to the next thing so get a wall calendar get a little pocket calendar get a planner use your google calendar whatever is easiest for you and most exciting for you to use that's what you need to plan on and then write down your goals on them okay write down important things write down doctor's appointments assignments to do but also like write down goals or habits that you want to include maybe like every Tuesday you want to get out of the house and go somewhere new so for the next four weeks in your monthly calendar you're

going to plan a new place for you to go every Tuesday so then when the Tuesday comes up guess what all you got to do is look at your calendar know where you're going or maybe have a list of different places that you can pick from move accordingly but you have to plan ahead I used to think life was all about living in the moment and oh no girl like I'm just living every day as it is and trying to make the best of it all no like yes there is some logic in that like of course let's live every day and make it the best we can but also you have to plan ahead you do you will feel so much more not in control but more so like you are living life not life is living you you know like you blink sometimes in a week passes a month passes and you're like holy shit I haven't

done anything like I haven't added added anything new to my life I really haven't thought about anything and that's because I'm just living in the moment letting life take me by the hand and string me along when in turn you can actually take life by the hand and choose where you want to go but you have to plan ahead and in fact planning ahead will make things less scary planning ahead will make your life feel more enjoyable it'll make you feel like you have a little bit more control over things it'll make you feel like you are actually a part of life you are living with it instead of living against it in that sort of sense so dare to dream plan ahead a little bit and once again just incorporate one new goal that's it okay i have some worksheets that i

actually think will help with this i'll upload those in the patreon tomorrow um i went through like a cbt therapy and they had us do this like behavioral understanding worksheets so i'll upload in the patreon if you guys want some like actual homework for you to do to understand your brain to understand your behaviors and set new goals accordingly hi hannah i hope you're doing well i need some advice so this past month i've been seeing this guy and we've been on some dates we've been texting every day and the last time i saw him i asked him where do you see this going and he just did not give a straight answer he just said he needed more time which i'm kind of okay with i'm still trying to think about things but this past weekend he hasn't texted me at all

and I opened Instagram to see he's posted pictures of a friend of his with her ass out and everything and um like literal straight up ass shot pictures and I just don't feel comfortable with that and of course we're not like together anything but I don't know if I should take this as a warning sign my friends say I should just brush it off what do you think I should do also as a side note he has like so many pictures of girls in lingerie on his wall and that also kind of makes me company and like feel objectified so what do you think listen i'm your internet big sister i'm here to help you out but i want to be real with you here leave that man in the past in the dirt and the grime that he's living in and let him do his fucking thing because i think you are seeing this

as like a possible relationship like you asked hey what do you want to be which shows me that you were looking for something more serious he said oh i don't know which is a man's term for i want more time alone to myself like i don't want to be in a relationship right now he just straight didn't straight out say that because he knew he would lose access to you and in turn that's weird and a little bit manipulative and i think if he's already doing things that you are uncomfortable with in the first month you should ghost that man okay get your power back delete his number block him delete him off instagram like literally you have to get rid of every single tie and then move on with your life as if he never existed because i guarantee

there's a man out there who's not going to make you feel like that and if you're already feeling shitty it genuinely is not worth it if you're already feeling uncomfortable it is not worth it because these things are going to be continuous problems in your relationship moving forward trust me I dated a man with a girl best friend and all of my suspicions were correct and I wish I didn't waste my time there it's not worth it okay move forward delete block live your best life you'll find somebody who is there for you and good for you but you have to listen to your gut when you feel uncomfortable or when you have things going on in your life that you are just not okay with and at this point I think it is better for you to cut your losses and just be like this

man's a piece of shit and I don't I don't deserve that and he could have fun with his hose but I ain't gonna be a part of his harem okay I love you you deserve the world someone asked what to do if your partner is very sensitive and insecure what I'm about to say would probably make your partner cry but like they just got to get over it they really do i used to be the most sensitive insecure person on this planet and everything would set me off every single thing but guess what that's not the people's fault around me that's not my parents fault that's not anybody else's fault but my own my ego was too big sensitive people think they don't have an ego because i'm constantly thinking about everybody else no you're constantly thinking about yourself and how you feel and how you feel

is more important than other people's feelings and that simply is just not fair you're not going to be a stable understanding human human being and then i got over this i did some healing went to therapy you know whatever and then i started dating someone like this and this person was genuinely one of the most draining people in my entire life because i was walking on eggshells around this person constantly oh i'm doing something wrong because they're upset oh i breathed wrong and they're mad at me now and now i have to go apologize because they're just they're sensitive and insecure they can't help it guess what bitch yes they can they can and hopefully it's not impeding too much on your relationship although the dot dot dot question

mark question mark question mark question mark at the end of your question makes me a little bit concerned um but that is something they need to work on and you constantly walking on eggshells around them or you know enabling this sort of behavior in some sort of way like not going out with friends because they're insecure or not doing this thing because they're insecure or not behaving this certain way that you know is true to your behavior because they're sensitive that is enabling them and inhibiting you and that's not a healthy relationship that's something they need to fix on their own and maybe they're too sensitive to be in a relationship straight up but draining or dating one of those people that was just like highly sensitive

highly insecure and made it everybody else's fault or problem even though it was something they need to work on internally was one of the most draining relationships i've ever been in you know when they talk about like energy vampires that shit is an energy vampire like oh my god bitch I was having a good day and then I like opened the door wrong and all of a sudden we're in a huge fight because oh my god I made a two second eye contact with another person like Jesus Christ that's no way to live so honestly if this is a big issue in your in your relationship and this is something that is constantly coming up and you don't know how to help you got to help yourself first and you got to be honest with your partner and be like you are putting way too much

on me when this is something that you need to handle internally and i don't think this is gonna work out if you are constantly making me feel bad for simply existing and being happy and being who i am because your partner should make you feel that way okay they should uplift you they should encourage you um and they should also want to work on themselves in order to make the relationship it better love you someone asked what's your go-to warm coffee drink so the first warm coffee of the season I ordered the other day and it was a red velvet latte oh my god it was the best drink I've ever had in my entire life but when I tell you I went to the bathroom and you know did my little number two business not to be too TMI but I thought I was shitting blood I thought I was

pooping blood like oh my god i don't know how much red dye is in that drink but obviously too much so i'm not gonna be able to order that as much as i'd like very sad but i do like a hot chai with an espresso shot in it um if you do like a starbucks they'll do a hot chai or like ice chai hot chai with espresso shot and then like the pumpkin cream cold brew so good but that red velvet latte i think about it a lot i'm like what is red in here and can we leave it out and make it taste the same because red velvet is like just chocolate cake right with red food dye pretty sure that's all it is so like i don't know i don't know but i was so concerned about myself i was like oh my god you go to the hospital nope it was just my latte that morning um but red velvet

latte is what i have been ordering recently but i got a game plan to figure out something new if you have any recommendations please please let me know someone asked brazilian wax thoughts advice i've never had a brazilian wax but those are the bravest people on the entire planet they are so incredibly brave because like it's a sensitive area you know i can't even get my eyebrows waxed last time i got my eyebrows waxed i was 12 last time literally i was 12 my mom was like let's doing your eyebrows wax for the very first time i was like oh my god doing big girl things with my mom okay she put the wax on my eyebrows she ripped it off and literally my skin came off i have this permanent little scar underneath my eyebrow from where she ripped my skin off with this hot wax

not saying that's gonna happen on your pussy that's not what i'm meaning at all the skin on your face is way different than the skin on your pussy and it is a little bit more resilient down there trust me trust me not to scare you but after that i was like you know what all wax i think i'm good i really think i'm okay so i just plucked my arrows at home never gotten a brazilian have always always thought about it for like a video idea like i would love to do a little brazilian vlog so if you want to see that for me maybe i'll be i'll take i'll take the bullet i'll do it for us all you know i'll let you know how it goes but i do have friends who get it and they love it they really do if you're kind of like low maintenance girl which i am which is why i have

iud like i don't like to think about what's going on down there very much and i like to be secure you if you get a wax like you don't have to shave it's pretty smooth down there for a while and you go like once a month so it's just like very minimal maintenance instead of having to shave like every other day or once a week or whatever it may be depending on what you like down there but if you like a smooth you know low maintenance care I feel like it's a very bougie way to do that and those girls they're professionals okay the people waxing you they will make sure it is a quick a good process for you just make sure you wash before you go in um like shower right before you go in and make sure you have a little bit of hair going on down

there so there's something to grip onto like it's okay to go in with a full bush they'll handle it but it's going to be the smoothest you've ever been in your entire life now i'm debating like do I get one much to think about but I say be brave stay strong go for it life's all about trying new things you know who knows you might love it someone asked reigniting the spark in a long-term relationship okay so this is what you're gonna do week beforehand you're gonna go to your local sex shop you're gonna get online whatever it may be you're gonna order the hottest sluttiest sexiest lingerie set imaginable something that you like that you're gonna feel good in something that you enjoy okay now you are going to i'm assuming you guys probably live together even

if you don't maybe you're over visiting whatever what you're gonna do is you're gonna have a romantic dinner date night all right don't eat before the sex okay just wait just wait you're gonna come over have your set on underneath put on a dress put on i don't know a long sleeve t-shirt whatever it is something enough to cover it up so your partner doesn't know directly beforehand but it's like your dirty little secret oh so fun and what you're gonna do is you're gonna be like okay we're gonna have dinner tonight i'm gonna cook you dinner and when you sit down to cook you guys your favorite dinner you have to be like all of a sudden oh my god i forgot something can you please please run to the store for me please like i promise i'll make it up to you when you

get back maybe you didn't even forget anything you're gonna use it as an excuse okay so you're cooking dinner finish up the dinner make it like right when you're about to be done finish up the dinner send him off to the store in your lingerie make sure all the stovetops are off but like dinner's done this is just an excuse to get him out of the house when he gets back or they or your partner whoever everybody's gonna love this when they get back literally be like out laying on their bed full lingerie set surprise told you i'd make it up to you do it before dinner also because like when i eat i eat a lot and like i don't need anything else inside me especially a dick like that i'm gonna be too full so get out of the way before you eat do some crazy nasty fun

sex okay maybe incorporate a new sex toy maybe incorporate a new role play thing whatever you you guys are into do that finish up clean up have a great dinner afterwards watch a movie pass out go to bed that is how you reignite the spark literally just like a nice little surprise that's a lot that's a very complex but i think the spark is kept alive by like the little surprises in the relationship thinking ahead planning ahead making sure your partner doesn't have to think about it um and that's just like a fun one that came i came up with off the top of my head but you could like bring home their favorite dinner one night or wear their favorite outfit or you know show up with their favorite little toy that you are reminded of like it could be literally

anything the key of keeping the spark alive is to think ahead and celebrate them in the small and big ways hi hannah so it's currently one in the morning i went to bed at eight o'clock and woke up at like midnight so anxious and i'm pretty sure and it's weird because i've been doing really well for myself recently like i've been staying productive i've been trying to fix my sleep schedule i've been eating healthier but i just feel so anxious the point where i can't sleep and it's it's just so it's so stressful i don't know how to manage it really and it's because i'm going on a family vacation for five days in three days and i'm not looking forward to it at all i don't know why i agreed to go like i'm a grown woman i should have said no um and also i've been dating

this man but at the beginning of our relationship he was kind of like cheating on me so i think i should probably leave him right yeah okay but how do i manage my anxiety anyways love you okay so first of all get rid of that man what the fuck no wonder you have anxiety i feel like a lot of the times when i have anxiety and like very intense anxiety it's because of things that or situations that i'm putting myself in that i know isn't good for me you being in a relationship where he broke boundaries where he was not caring for you thinking about you no wonder you have anxiety get rid of that man that's gonna heal a majority of the anxiety now family trip i get it you you go through life having to do things to kind of appease other people now that shouldn't

be the only way you live your life but i understand having obligations like i don't want to fucking go to work but of course i got to and i'm gonna have a little bit of anxiety over that i don't want to go to that meeting but I have to and I'm gonna have a little bit of anxiety over that or I gotta go to this family you know trip and I don't really want to but I'm gonna have a little bit of anxiety over that first of all taking control of your life getting yourself out of bad situations such as this ugly ass disgusting ass man that's gonna give you confidence that's gonna ease your anxiety a little bit more but when you have anxiety over things you can't control or anxiety over things that you're kind of maybe making up in your head like you if you are the type of person like I am

where it's like I have anxiety and I don't even know where it's coming from or it's from a situation that's not even real or it's from just like an obligation that I have to fulfill brain dump brain dump don't let all those ideas and those things sit in your head okay you can release them you can open the floodgates and let them out this podcast is kind of like a giant brain dump for me honestly like if you think you are a talker cool sit down with yourself a little crazy trust me i know talk out loud get it all off your chest maybe like in the shower maybe when you're doing like a little self-care routine get it out of your head so you don't have to think about it anymore get in your notes app okay get in there and just let that shit out

get it all out of your brain every single thing it doesn't have to make sense it doesn't have to be in a specific order but getting those anxieties out physically and having a way that's healthy to release them. I feel like it's a great management tool for anxiety that you simply just can't control. Anxiety you can't control, such as the bad relationship you're in, you gotta get rid of him. You do. You're gonna feel so much better because of it. But anxieties you can't control, get it out of your head. Release them, okay? They're like trapped animals. You gotta open the floodgates so they can be free. Do a little mind dump. I guarantee you'll feel a little bit better someone asked is it oh shit i lost the question is it wrong to have a fuck around phase

love you girly no i think young women should have more fuck around phases which just means you should be a little bit more selfish and a little bit more self-exploratory like that is so important honestly be selfish explore what you want explore what you want to do that's what being young is about when you're 40 okay you can buy a house and figure it out then but for now when you are in your young 20s mid 20s late 20s i don't care you are needing to self-explore understand what you like what you don't like make mistakes try new things meet new people have good sex have bad sex you know like you are supposed to explore every inch of this world and seeing young girls get stuck and quite honestly not know anything about themselves is so heartbreaking so no i think

every girl should have a fuck around phase every single person should have a fuck around phase and it can last as long as you want okay it could last nine years it could last forever quite honestly but i do think especially growing up like as a woman we don't have the expectation as much as like our grandparents to you know marry young have kids young build a home young but those women like i talk to my grandma sometimes and she's like i just wish i could have gone to college and it's like oh holy shit like i'm really really taking what i have in front of me for granted and the freedom i have and after having that conversation with her when i was younger fresh out of a relationship I was like okay bitch time to go crazy like time to go crazy

stay safe trust your instincts trust your gut feelings if you meet a man he's a creep tell him fuck off if you meet anybody in there creep tell him fuck off if you are invited to a thing and you don't want to go you can say no if you're invited to a thing and it's scary and it's a little new but you want to go go try new things travel to new places meet new people that is what being young is all about and I highly encourage you to do so it will make you fully understand every single aspect of yourself what you like what you dislike what you're looking for so then when you're older and your frontal cortex fully develops and you are able to make real solid decisions for yourself you can make them knowing that you truly understand what you want and what

you're going for and in turn it'll be easier to go after those things so yes have a fuck around phase yes have a lot of fun go after it girl oh someone asked um something about saying i love you like when do i know how can i tell that etc you know right away honestly like honestly you shouldn't have to you know fight to get the puzzle pieces to fit in place you know because they fit in place and you have like the urge to say i love you like in those new couple months of dating like you kind of have to hold yourself back i or maybe i'm crazy maybe i'm crazy but it's like even if i'm scared if i'm a little unsure i know that i want to say it and it's kind of hard to let it not slip out you know what's wild I have been the first person to say I love you in every single one of my

relationships I don't know if that says more about me or the men I'm dating but I'm just the kind of person who it's like if I know how I feel and like listen these are like six months in like I know how I feel seven months maybe a year I know how I feel about you there's really no point in holding it back what I'm a fear I'm fearing like rejection we're already dating I'm fearing you not saying it back well then that's a big problem if you don't fucking love me and we're dating then like what's the point of it all so I kind of get to a point where it's like why am I inhibiting myself and my communication and the way I want to speak to this person the for the fear of like being rejected in some sort of way there should be like a basis of understanding and a basis of like love there

such as like we're dating we've been dating or at least together and there's no point in holding yourself back that's how i feel so i'm always quick to be like i love you because like how the fuck you feel about me bitch why haven't you said it i'm gonna say it let's see how you feel and yeah i also love being spontaneous a little crazy so like of course i'm gonna be the first to say i love you you know like what is there to lose what is there to lose oh they get scared and they run away okay pussy all I did is say I love you like you are being loved and you're afraid of that okay goodbye you know most of the time if you say I love you they're gonna say it right back to your face like of course they feel the same way um but yeah I think you should know you know when

to say it you know when it feels right and if it slips out don't be embarrassed own that shit own how you feel and don't be afraid to communicate the way you feel you know someone asked how do i know what i want to be like my career more specifically trial and error you are never going to be able to think yourself into the right situation you have to go out and try get an internship at this place um get a job at this place all at different places that you want to like try on new hats that's you're young that's what life is about okay maybe you want to be a barista maybe you want to own your own coffee shop go work as a barista for a while maybe you want to be a nurse like i did go to nursing school for a little bit if you like it you're gonna excel if

you don't like it guess what you can do something else i thought i wanted to be in the corporate art world for a while nope that wasn't gonna work for me try something else still in the art realm you know i did enjoy it but i wanted to tweak it a little bit that's okay thought i wanted to work in the restaurant industry nope definitely don't i mean i'm here it is good money i will give thanks to that but like do i want to be here forever no but i had to learn that through being there and living through it there are so many opportunities out there waiting for you go after them try new things try on new hats it's okay for a pair of pants to not fit but don't stay in that pair of pants go try on a new pair of pants until you find the right ones okay it's literally life

is all about you don't have to take it too seriously it's okay to not like something it's okay to like something as well but you're not going to know that about yourself until you simply try oh how to be okay with being single for the first time in four years i love my solitude but i'm a lover girl that's okay just because you're not in a relationship doesn't mean you can't not be a lover girl you still are a lover girl at your core you got to turn that love towards something else don't turn it towards fuck boys don't turn it towards dating turn it towards yourself you have not spent alone time with yourself probably in four years understand who you are now understand your past relationships where you've grown from and where you want to go

and turn that amazing uninhibited lover girl energy that is so pure and so full of just light and love turn it towards yourself because that's what you deserve you deserve to feel that unquivering love from somebody that you can trust and listen if you can't trust anybody you should at least be able to trust yourself you know so i say i dare you to spend some time with yourself take yourself out on some self dates do some self-care days you know treat yourself to some fun things um take yourself on like vacation literally whatever it may be turn that energy inwards it will feel so incredibly good also if anybody's getting out of a new relationship right know it's gonna be awkward at first it is it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you

it doesn't mean there's anything that you're gonna have to change that doesn't mean you are on the wrong path what happened happened you need to take what you can from that relationship learn understand move forward trust in yourself uplift yourself have some fun reach out to those friends you haven't talked to in a while um reach out to your family whatever it may be but reconnect you know just because it feels a little awkward right now and you're maybe like now going down a new path that you never could have imagined for yourself that doesn't mean it's the wrong path you just got to get accustomed to it keep pushing forward you'll be okay I promise hi Hannah um sorry my mind might be all over the place because I decided to record this really

impromptu but um I am just not doing good and uh I take like these self-care days sometimes just to chill out like school is exhausting work is exhausting and just life and people and sometimes I just need like a self-care day to stay at home but then I end up like just sitting on my phone in bed all day and not actually doing anything productive and happy and fulfilling for my life you know um and I know that social media is the problem but within it I find it like a lot of inspiration with fashion or like even content creating which I do want to like get into so I do have any tips on how to like balance that social media usage without making yourself feel awful anyway love you bye thank you so much hello beautiful here's the thing my self-care day

sometimes is me being horizontal in bed like rotting in bed on my phone for eight hours sometimes that is self-care and that's because i am like you i do find inspiration in it i mean of course there's good and bad to everything but i do feel like i use social media pretty much generally as like a inspiration tool you know i'll scroll on tiktok for a little bit uh can't find anything here cool i'll put on a podcast and i'll scroll on pinterest and come up with a new pinterest board to come up with new ideas maybe new video ideas new instagram ideas whatever it is like i feel like as long as you're finding inspiration from it and maybe your self-care day is like i just need to rest and not think then sitting and scrolling on your phone for like

eight hours that's okay i and you're like hannah no it's not i think it is i do now it can't be your every single day that's when it becomes unhealthy but sometimes you just need a day to indulge in whatever you want to indulge in and if that happens to be social media or just like not even social media just like on your phone it could be pinterest it could be tumblr things that you're driving inspiration from go for it i do not think you should feel you know like bad about yourself for doing that because i do that but once again it's not an everyday thing it's like okay I just need to chill the fuck out and I don't want to use my brain today and I feel that way and I'm gonna honor that now I do understand when social media becomes a little bit unhealthy you

know you do your eight hours of scrolling and you're like holy shit I didn't do anything but maybe that's what your day was for for not doing something maybe you do like a bath in the meantime maybe you do like a face mask you know you can listen to a podcast and scroll on your phone while doing laundry use it as a catch-up day but also i don't think you should feel too bad about it now if you feel like it's an issue like oh my god i'm on my phone too much i'm not using it in a healthy way you gotta find the healthiness inside of it and also maybe take a step away when you're using social media too much you're gonna have to force yourself out into the real world and do new hobbies new tasks new things um when i feel like i'm on my phone too much maybe it's like

i'm gonna sit down and i'm gonna paint i'm still gonna have my phone next to me and maybe there's a youtube video playing but like a informative youtube video or like a movie playing or you know a tv show that i enjoy but i'm painting i'm doing something in my hands i'm using air dry clay i'm airbrushing maybe i'm building a lego set maybe i'm puzzling me and my friends sat down and puzzled and watched gone girl last night like there are different little things you can do to escape back into the real world and still have like a chill you know rest relaxation self-care moment um and also utilize your phone for good but listen girl i'm gonna be the one to say it and like if you just need a day to not use your brain and just fucking scroll on social media and

rot in bed and that's self-care to you not every day but every once in a while that's completely valid and we all have different ways to cope with this life and i don't think there's anything wrong with that I do that every once in a while too I feel like Sunday what was I doing Sunday not Sunday last Thursday that's what I did literally I was like all I want I just worked this giant party at my work I put in so much fucking work I made so much money I am exhausted I've been overworking myself I just need a day and this is my day off so I told my boyfriend I was like I need a day i want pho for dinner but i just want to sit in bed and scroll on my phone and play on my silly little pinterest app and collect my pretty little pictures and not do anything and that's exactly

what i did that's exactly what i knew i needed and i felt so much better afterwards honestly but yeah once again if that's your every single day or if you feel like you need to be more in touch with the world around you pick up some hobbies you know paint create do a little bath maybe a little face mask whatever it may be and also when you're collecting inspiration use them um maybe it's like oh a photo shoot idea maybe it's a video idea you can see a video on tiktok and be like i want to recreate this guess what you can't no one's stopping you go have fun live life enjoy it but also it's okay to have a little rotting girl moment because i have a lot of those and it really keeps me it keeps me balanced especially when i have high high work life

like i work a lot i gotta have those moments where i'm just like rotting it evens me out makes me a whole human being you know i love you someone said do you stalk the profiles the people whose questions you pick not really just because i go through like 30 or 40 of them but sometimes you guys will like email me or dm me like a very lengthy question over like something specific you're going through something that also like i maybe won't answer on the podcast but i will still reply to you guys like through instagram dms or email um and then like if it's a deep deep question and i gotta like send back a letter then i'll do some stalking i'll be like okay how old are they what are they going through what does it look like let's get a good roundabout answer but no

for everything else i just don't have the time i don't i used to but now i'm like we got to keep it moving all your profile pictures are so fucking cute and your handles are adorable and that's all i gotta know someone asked getting out of a slump it's so hard to get out of bed in the morning slash stick to my routine that's because you have a routine that you don't like yeah it's gonna be hard to stick to a routine that you hate and like i get if your routine is waking up at 6 a.m to go to 8 a.m class like yeah that kind of sucks but let's make that first like 30 minutes to an hour the best 30 minutes to an hour that you could possibly need you have to understand your needs so then you can behave accordingly i used to have such a hard time getting out of bed but now like

waking up having my morning coffee to look forward to having a coffee that tastes good to look forward to doing my like 30 minutes of phone time and then doing like a nice little makeup routine while also listening to my favorite podcast putting on a cute outfit that I maybe laid out the night before okay getting ready moving on with my day you gotta have a routine with however much time you have maybe you have four hours maybe you have one hour you gotta have a routine that excites you in college where I didn't have a lot of time and I had to get to like my 8 a.m lecture I'd wake up at seven i would put on a comfy outfit because that's all i care about i'm not pulling up in high heels for 8 a.m class maybe 4 p.m because i gotta go out afterwards but 8 a.m no we are

gonna sacrifice the cuteness for some comfy clothes we are going to go to the we had like a communal space with a starbucks and i would always get my dollar drip coffee in the morning and they used to have like i don't think they have this at starbucks anymore but they used to set out like cold cream and sugar and cinnamon so you can like do it up however you want and so that's what I would do and that'd be like my fun little morning routine drink my warm coffee sit in the warm communal college space before my class head to class get my 8 a.m over with take a nap you know you got to have something that excites you in the morning though and gets you out of bed easily so I dare you to change up your routine I guarantee it can get better ask yourself what

you need and give it to yourself someone asked bars slash clubs for freshly 21 in kansas city if you're a kansas city girly let me put you on honestly i think you should just go bar hop around westport westport's like our big bar area buck power and light ah there's just nothing up there is boring like go to westport and then bar hop do like harry's and then go over to kelly's and then maybe do like tin roof which i'm not a huge fan of like fuck it go get a shot there it's gonna be the most expensive shot your entire life but maybe hop over there and then you go to like fountain house if you want like a little bit of a club experience my go-to club is aura it's like the edm nightclub off main but they're only open thursday friday saturday so if you want to save

some celebrating for the weekend that's yeah that's my go-to club there's not really any clubs in westport but it is fun to still bar hop through there and you definitely won't be the only people bar hopping i went and watched the chiefs game there like last weekend with my friends and there was a bridal party um bar hopping through out westport and they were all wearing like 2016 tumblr outfits like that was their theme and it was so fucking cute like i was obsessed so go bar hop wear your birthday sash you'll probably get some free shots have some fun someone asked do you usually smoke joints or from a bong honestly i feel like it's pretty even if i'm at home i'm smoking from my bong if i'm outside i'm smoking a joint so but they're both

like close contenders they're both my favorites it just depends on like where i am i will smoke a joint inside sometimes um that's really nice i feel very glamorous whenever i smoke a joint inside but usually for my throats my throat health i smoke from my bong my cute little strawberry bong it's adorable and how do you enjoy giving oral i feel like a piece of shit and i'm over it a girly just wants to have fun well i really recommend and go back and listen to a bunch of the episodes where i gave just like general blowjob tips but i think the biggest tip i can really give you if you feel like you don't enjoy it is you are in control you are i feel like a lot of girls especially like in a heterosexual relationship are like giving a blow job it's like

sometimes the men want to be in control and like face fuck you and like cool it's fun if you don't like being in control but taking the power and be like no i'm giving you pleasure i am in control you lay down you sit down don't even touch me like i'm the one doing this to you that is where you can find enjoyment from it like you're the captain of the boat babe okay how do you want this to go do you want to last long do you want to last short how do you want to do it you know you are really the person taking the reins and giving this person pleasure so have fun doing it i feel like the control aspect is like a fun little part of it you know like you're not there to be a pleasure source in that sort of sense such as like being used in that sort of way

but also like i get if you like that vibes been there but i feel like when people don't like giving oral it's because they feel like they're out of control no no you are in control that tell that man sit back don't speak and then you take him on a ride of his life honestly um and have some fun also oral like you don't have to sit there and give him a blow job till he comes like it can be like a a uh what's the word what's the word what's the word you guys know it i know you know it and i know you're screaming at me right now um oh it can be like a foreplay thing so like you can just like have fun he doesn't have to come but it can be like a foreplay thing before you guys have actual sex you know have fun with it make it whatever you want to be you're in

control babe oh i love this question because it kind of bounces off the previous topic of like the fuck around phase but someone said um how did you with having an identity crisis felt this there's been many a times where i've like stopped stared at myself in the mirror and been like who are you who am i looking at what's going on i don't know who this bitch is and it's gonna send me into an existential spiral don't worry you don't need to have a spiral just yet but i feel like a lot of people sit with their identity crisis well they realize they have an identity crisis and they sit with it they try and think their way through it oh well maybe it's this or maybe it's this or like i just got out of a relationship i don't know who i am so i'm gonna

sit and i'm a spiral and i'm trying to think myself into a perfect person that's not how it works that's not how it works you can like dream and come up with ideas and inspiration and aspire to be things and set goals sure but unless you are simply going out at going outside and having new experiences to learn from you are never going to be able to understand who you are okay that's we have so many horror movies of girls who have been trapped inside for too long and then they get outside and they go fucking crazy i mean they're discovering who they are slay you know carrie good for you but if you sit and try and think your way through an identity crisis it's just gonna make you spiral even more okay you have to go out and experience i know it's scary

I know the real world is terrifying I get that but you got to feel the fear and honestly do it anyway you can do all the mood boarding you can do worksheets you can do therapy sure you're gonna understand a little bit more about who you are but it's like when you're online shopping and you find a pair of cute boots and you're like wow that looks great on that person it's gonna look fantastic on me and then you order them and they get here and you try them on you're like wow I hate this that doesn't mean anything's wrong with you. It just means you try something you learn more about yourself You move forward accordingly. I hate these boots I'm gonna go order a different pair of boots that are a little bit taller a little shorter

Maybe a different toe size whatever it is boom Now you got a pair of boots that fit but unless you are literally going out trying new things You're not going to understand who you are and the best way to understand who you are is to try new things they don't have to be big like I'm not saying go out and have like a fucking crazy night at the club I mean sure that's what I did when I was going through an identity crisis we all gotta do what we gotta do but like maybe it's simply trying a new food getting outside and having an incentive to get out there maybe it's going to a new bar with your friends maybe it's picking out new clothing with your friends maybe it's going and meeting new

people maybe it's hanging out with that person that you've been wanting to hang out with but we're a little nervous maybe it can be literally anything i literally am just sitting here daring you to go out and experience the world bad experiences doesn't mean that there's something wrong with you it is simply a learning experience so next time you can do better have a new idea of how you want to go about things understand yourself further there are going to be good and bad experiences in life and it's impossible to constantly only have good experiences you have to take the good from the bad and you got to take the bad from the good sometimes you know what i'm saying ladies okay but don't be fearful this should be a powerful time for yourself you should

feel yourself being uplifted through this it's a little nerve-wracking it's a little scary but also everything in life is so you might as well have a little fun while doing it okay i love you hey Hannah um I'm calling in from North England and it's weird because I don't feel like I've ever heard anyone with my kind of accent calling before maybe I'm wrong but I've been listening to the podcast for a long time but anyway uh I recently got my birth chart reading done and I've always believed and kind of associated myself with being a cancer woman which makes sense to a certain degree because I'm a very emotional gal uh but yeah I had the birth chart reading and I discovered like due to the somersaults and the time that I was born I'm actually

a Gemini and in my eyes Geminis tend to have a bad reputation for being a little bit shallow and amongst other things but as a fellow Gemini woman I want to hear all about what you love about being a Gemini tell me tell me and just want to say love the podcast I've been listening for two years and I love the community that it creates thanks bye hello love i love your accent also amazing um i love a birth chart reading i actually get these done quite often i've had one full birth chart reading done and that was amazing but then i'll also get like yearly ones done where they'll like kind of predict and tell you what's going to happen as a on a month-to-month basis my two favorite um places to buy these from are mercurial

sarah on instagram you've probably seen her weekly horoscope readings um and then also on etsy spiritual strength co she does amazing readings as well her name's orla i love her um those are the two places i usually purchase from i've been meaning to buy one from mercurial sarah for like the next year that's on my to-do list love her she's amazing so fucking spot on but when you get these it kind of gives you a new perspective and a new understanding and also i love that you're a gemini that is amazing um if you're looking to gift yourself something or gift somebody else something this upcoming holiday season i think a birth chart reading or like a any sort of spiritual reading is such a fun gift to give um but you thought you were cancer

and you're a gemini and honestly that makes a lot of sense cancers and gemini's they're around the same season but they have a lot of very similar similar characteristics one of my best friends is a cancer and the similarities we have is we're very understanding we're very open we're very compassionate um we see all sides of things we have a lot of compassion and care for the world and the people around us we feel things very passionately i think that's probably why you resonated with cancer so strongly also you probably have cancer in your chart somewhere but i love being a gemini woman gemini men a little scary not gonna lie but women we are so understanding we are so caring we're fun with the life of the party we are very reflective both

inward and outward the only reason that i'm able to give so many different perspectives on things when you guys bring up your topics is simply because i'm a gemini and it's impossible for me to not see all sides of things like with my friends i've always been the mediator with my family I've always been the mediator because I've always been the person to be like well if you see it this way you know what I mean which can be good and bad but I don't think you being a Gemini is a bad thing I'm a Gemini girl and I love it I love being a Gemini I was raised by a Gemini woman she is the strongest most caring most compassionate bad bitch woman that I know I was raised by a Gemini man who is also so incredibly just caring and understanding and a go-getter and I love that

um I feel very lucky to have been raised by two Geminis and to also be a Gemini and I don't think you should be fearful of it but yes I love a good birth chart reading go support those two people I mentioned previously um they are amazing human beings and also I love a good it's just like it's so fun you learn new things about yourself and it's crazy how spot on these readings can be and also things that you kind of been hiding or not hiding but like bad qualities that you don't want to address it'll address it quickly thoughtfully and it'll help you move through it get through it and i love that but yeah buy your friend a birth chart reading don't be afraid to being a gemini own it we are the best honestly oh no someone said girl how do you mend a broken

bong got the cutest perk bong oh no smoked three times and it broke i went through this i bought my first rig ever at my old apartment i have this like kind of tradition where every time i move to a new place i go and i purchase just like a new little rig new little smoking thing to kind of christen the area so I went out I bought this $200 beautiful pink glass milky black glass intricate rig okay brought it home used maybe three times it broke I was in shambles I was like I should be able to glue it back together something no no you have to let it go you do and I'm so sorry there is no fixing it because if you glue it back together you're basically smoking glue and that's fucked up and i don't need any of you guys doing that unless you are like a glass

blower and you can melt those pieces and stick them back together it's simply impossible and sometimes in life things go wrong and you just gotta release them back into the universe where they belong there is no fixing it and i'm so sorry have a little bong funeral and maybe buy a new one but i don't want you guys smoking glue do not glue your bong back together not a good idea love you okay i love this someone asked how to how do i date a baddie and this is a great question because dating a baddie is not for the weak you better be a strong independent successful person because the most insecure saddest men will get in a relationship with a baddie and want to drag them down to the depths of hell with them and i'm tired of seeing people getting caught in this

kind of relationship okay ditch that man if he's making you sad if he's not uplifting you and making you to the baddie you are it's not worth it but to pull a baddie you need to be secure in yourself um understanding of who you are and confident in that the same way a baddie is going to be secure in themselves and confident in it you need to understand that feeling and uplift it in yourself so then you can do the same for your partner okay you also need to encourage their habits that make them who they are you have to encourage their what they enjoy doing um the things that make them happy you need to encourage that whether it's like oh they do flawless ass makeup that's what makes them a baddie maybe they're really good at painting that's what makes

them a baddie maybe they have amazing outfits that's what makes them a baddie maybe they can really fucking skate that's what makes them a baddie whatever it is your partner needs to see that recognize it up you also have to be secure in yourself because dating a baddie they are going to be kind of like the center of attention and that's okay whether they ask for it or they don't okay you got to be so secure in yourself that when other people look their direction because they are literally glowing from the inside out you don't think any different you think you know what yeah that makes sense like of course she's hot she's beautiful she's radiant she is loving she's kind she's a baddie okay so of course people are going to be turning heads that should not make

you insecure you should not demean your partner in any way you should not push them down in any sort of way you have to be very secure in yourself dating a baddie really is not for the weak uplift them support them show them all the love you can see that glow and that radiance and that light and honor it show up for it support it i also feel like you can't put these people on a pedestal sure uplift support be secure in yourself but if you put them on a pedestal and you kind of make them into like a celebrity you're just gonna become a fan and no one wants to like date a fan they want to date someone that's their equal so have something going for yourself support uplift but also don't put them in a category that makes them like godlike that makes people untouchable

i feel like that's kind of dehumanizing in a sense and you don't want a partner that's going to dehumanize you in that way you want a partner who's going to see you for all your flaws and love and accept you no matter what and of course baddies all got flaws okay i shit i poop i fart you know like i'm a human fucking being i snore i'm gonna get acne but that shouldn't that doesn't take away from who you are that just makes you more of a human being and they need to be accepting of that if you if you see them as like a celebrity if you see them as like a godlike figure when the humanizing things come out that reality is gonna wear off and that's going to be like kind of like a make or break situation for you so just like they're any other human being a baddie is just

like you okay and when you're dating them treat them like a human being support love uplift but also you need to be at the same level as them you know they can't be some untouchable figure in your eyes of course they should be you know as a partner you should like love encourage but they shouldn't be untouchable okay we're all human we all make mistakes it is what it is but yeah dating a baddie is not for a week you got to be secure in yourself you got to be able to not only uplift yourself but uplift other people as well um you have to have probably something going for you at least you have to have goals ambitions um and you got to be a ride or die you really do but it's possible for anybody all my baddies who are listening right now you will find love you

just have to find that man who will love cherish uplift accept you for who you are um and that will come around eventually i pinky promise never settle and i guarantee you'll find it someone asked how do i let go of a man i think the best way to hold yourself accountable is to so you gotta have a best friend you gotta have somebody that you can kind of dump all this information on like kindly not like trauma dumping but be like okay i'm gonna tell you all this shit so then you can hold me accountable so what you're gonna do in front of your friend is literally tell them all the shitty awful negative qualities that this man has that you didn't want to be around why you left whatever it is make a list first and then read it all back to her

so then she knows about it so when you are in that moment moment of weakness like but do i she's like bitch do you remember because at that time you're probably not remembering or thinking about it but she remembers and that's for sure and that's why i think having friends who hold your hold you accountable have different viewpoints who are not afraid to voice how they feel about things in your life are the best kind of friends that you can have i feel like some people don't like that they think it's like oh you're going against me but no your friends should always have your back they know what is best for you and in this kind of situation when you're like hey i need you to hold me accountable they are looking out for the best possibility for you so dump out everything

that you that has been bad so then your friend can hold you accountable in your moments of weakness someone asked have you ever intentionally gone celibate before if so how did you benefit love you so much i have never been like celibate celibate i feel like well i lost my virginity pretty late um so i guess celibate before that but um after i lost my virginity i would i wasn't like boy crazy but like i wasn't celibate in a sense where it's like i am not fucking anybody for this long i feel like that's kind of what celibacy is like but i have a friend who's currently celibate and i think it is one of the best choices for women to make for themselves and like if i get out of my relationship i will probably be celibate because it really teaches

you how to de-center men from your life she literally is like i don't think she's fucked anybody in like nine months and she could she could pull anybody she honestly wants but it's kind of just like a why would i you know like is it really gonna be that good is that one night stand really gonna actually like make me come that hard is it really gonna be that good is this man even worth talking to? And half the time, actually a majority of the time, the answer is no. Like she'll get someone's number and she's like, uh, not interested. Like I can see all these flaws because I'm not living in this state of wanting to impress a man or thinking that I need a man around me or I need his attention. So celibacy, I feel like is a very intentional way of decentering

men from your life. And it's a great tool for women to use in their life. And I really, really recommend it um i think it is really powerful and it gives you a lot more understanding of yourself and what is truly worth your time because then you you have some time maybe you get three months four months into being celibate and then like to break that you know are you gonna do it over some lame loser probably not like you the intention to do so is not there it has to be someone very important someone who proves themselves to you in order to do that so de-centering your men from your life is always a great way to live life but if you do feel like they have like a sexual hold on you girl buy a vibrator and go celibate you will feel so much better about yourself i promise

anyways we have fucking flown through this episode in the mornings my boyfriend he will like leave the house to give me space to record these podcasts and usually he's gone for like four hours like sometimes it takes me a while sometimes I'm just like in the groove of things and I've been recording for like two hours I was like yeah you can come pick me up for fun now he's like what you're already done I know crazy you know what it's probably because I did it's probably because I didn't smoke weed beforehand when I smoke weed it it slows my thinking down it makes me very intentional it makes me think things things through a little deeper which is good amazing and really productive and really beneficial but also it kind of slows down my

creative process and I think just downing a shot of espresso and then hitting record and then getting into this really the vibes have been great but I still want to smoke with you guys so let's go load a little bowl I hope you guys have had a great day today I would also like to talk a little bit about what's going on in the stars real quick we are in eclipse season right now and i feel like we had an eclipse if you guys didn't know on saturday um it was cloudy here i really wish we could have seen it or like even just like the weird shadows but we go through eclipse periodically i feel like we're gonna we went or we go through three a year so they're nothing new to us but they are just a slight challenge um we're in a what's it called oh

like a mercury retrograde that's what everybody believes is a challenge which it is but eclipses are kind of a different challenge because it kind of takes everything that you thought you knew and flips it on a head and makes you really think things through ask yourself is this the right thing for me am i doing the right thing should i be doing something differently which is why i also think we're kind of coinciding a breakup season or why everybody's calling it a breakup season people are taking time to look inwards which is exactly what you should do look inwards so then you can accurately look outwards and they're realizing maybe this relationship isn't good for me very normal part of an eclipse season but this eclipse season i would like to make it very

abundantly clear it is all about really relationships um and how these relationships are affecting you how your relationships how you want your relationships to be how you want your relationship with yourself to be um what you want to bring into your life so it's a big time for reflection inward which is why i'm gonna upload the um worksheets on my patreon i feel like it's a great worksheet for just like looking inward asking ourselves are these behaviors good what behaviors do i want to bring in what goals do i want to bring in who do i want to be what kind of relationships do i want to garner what do i want to accomplish but this is not a time for manifestation okay manifesting during eclipse is going to you're going to get what you want but

the universe is going to be kind of laughing along the way this is not a time for manifestation this is a time for sitting reflecting being intentional and really just asking yourself where do i want to be in this next period of my life anyways happy eclipse season let's hit this bowl yum oh my god i hit the weed but it hit back anyways cheers girlies i had a blast i hope you guys did as well um don't be afraid of truly knowing who you are i think it is the most powerful tool anybody can truly inhibit and have is just having understanding in themselves because then nobody can really tell you who you are only you can define that but you gotta be brave enough to discover it so go out enjoy make mistakes try new things try on new pants and if they don't fit

get a new pair it's okay but i love you all i hope you all are staying strong this season having a little bit of fun indulge in the fall activities go buy yourself a pumpkin go to the pumpkin patch and enjoy this warm weather while it lasts i'm gonna get ready go get a big warm bowl of pho and enjoy the rest of my day and i hope you guys do so as well i love you all so much and i'll see you all next week