Smoke Sesh - college, blacking out, mean girls & breakup szn

Episode Date: August 19, 2025

helloooo everyone and welcome back to the smoke sesh so excited to be with you all on this beautiful tuesday- today we chat being left alone, days off, rom coms, Pedro Pascal, letterboxed, going out of town, edible era, new hobbies, break up season, mercury retrograde, weeding out the weak, college drop out, party days, going back to school (stay in school), my years of partying and drinking, love triangles, picking your lover, transforming without death, healthy transformation, love heals, using big words, the power of our brains, staying intelligent, AI hate, end of summer, looking towards fall, halloween, men... and all the embarrassing elements, drunk texting your ex, mean girls, handling mean girls, giving energy, picking up girly tips, ingrown hairs, smooth legs, traveling for cheap, planning ahead, fish update, it gets better, college girl tips, going out outfits, halloween prep plus much much more! if you want to see more from me follow and submit your questions on insta at hannahmarlene and join the patreon for extra content always! at patreon.com/smokeseshshawty chat soon! MUAH!

Two in five Canadians will hear the words, you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire

and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. listen everybody needs a fairy godmother you know just somebody to look out for them some people call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sash so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all hello hello hello hotties and welcome back to another fun little sexy episode of smoke sesh my name is hannah your host and i'm so excited to be with you all here again today on this

beautiful little tuesday morning um hope you're all doing well hope you had a sane and safe week I know I did my boyfriend was actually out of town this week I know he left I think on last Tuesday he's getting home today I have to go pick him up from the airport in like three hours but I have basically been home alone with danger my number one man all week and it has been honestly like kind of fun kind of fun it's been nice to just like be alone alone and quiet quiet because usually usually I'm the one going out of town and like leaving him here alone so he gets the alone time he never really goes out of town or like if we do go out of town it's usually always together so this time around him and his friends got together they wanted to go on a little like

skateboard trip okay cute hey babe have fun do your thing they went to LA for the week and yeah I was left alone here just kidding I thrive being alone I truly love being alone not that I like hate my boyfriend or anything it's just like even with anybody if I spend too much time with them I'm like I need to retreat inwards to my inner world and take some time to be completely silent and celibate and all of the bits alone you know what I mean so it's been really nice just to kind of like focus on all the things that I want to do pick up some new hobbies do some shopping do some cleaning watch all the random movies that I want to watch it was so relaxing and so nice I'm feeling so rejuvenated especially after the hell of a period that I had a couple

weeks ago the chaos of that mercury retrograde and the insanity of that last full moon mama needed some inside time she did some quiet time for sure you guys is this hat serving republican i'm so scared because my i feel like a part of my style i mean my style ranges in so many different directions depending on how i'm feeling but a part of my style is i do like to touch on the more country side of things but you know how difficult it gets with the country side of things because you can really quickly start serving republican and that is the last thing i want to do because republicans are not sexy they do not have sex appeal they are not sexy unfortunately nor am i republican so why the fuck would i want to serve that anyways but i got this hat

in colorado on vacation it says american dream and it's camo and i thought it was kind of like a a ha ha tee hee moment of just like no but i am the american dream hello hello i'm just a girly living her best life being hot and sexy and doing the most that i can honestly so apologize for the camo jump scare but it is what it is i am in my country era though you guys i am having my hannah montana miley cyrus coming home to alabama country moment do you know what i mean am i a little too delusional for the beginning of this episode are you picking up the breadcrumbs I'm putting down I start horseback riding lessons tomorrow and I could not be more excited I went boot shopping the other day girls what the helly why is a pair of cowboy boots actually $400 I mean to be fair

I walked into that place and I was like they're like what's your budget I was like no a girl like me there's no budget I mean technically there is but in reality there's not truly I'm just looking for like the cutest pair obviously obviously and there's this adorable western store that's been around in kc for forever um the owner of my restaurant was like oh yeah you have to go there if you're looking for anything you got to go there because they're amazing they've been here forever they know the ins and outs of everything they're gonna have the best stock go there so i went there and oh my god they were so sweet little small little mom and pop shop the lady helping me was a baddie I was like girl I don't know what I'm looking for here's what I'm doing please point me

in the right direction we're like I'm gonna get the most use out of these $300 boots you know what I mean she's like I have this exact pair I love them I have them in black they are fantastic they'll last you forever highly recommend like if you're going to spend money spend it on these and to be fair they're just a pair of brown cowboy boots but when it comes to clothes I do high you kind of care where they come from and I didn't want just like a name pair brand of boots I wanted something that felt a little bit more me and there's this brand called hire and they are a KC based cowboy boot brand literally I didn't realize growing up they always had a shop in a showroom like right next to my house growing up I was just never in the countryside of things so I

wasn't aware of that even being a thing so that was really cool to be able to kind of like rep Kansas City get some boots get ready be prepared my instructor is so sweet we've been texting all weekend and yeah I think I'm just gonna have such a blast picking up this new fun probably very expensive hobby but it's something I've always wanted to do like literally like I said on the last episode it's something that I've always been drawn to I've always been a horse girl in my heart but I have never let her run free and wild in the plains you know what I mean just because my parents were like hell no we're not putting you on the back of a horse and then also like life got crazy forgot about that dream for a while but what's so beautiful about being

in your mid to late 20s is you kind of start to get a little bored you know what i mean you figure out the chaos of it all you figure out the job at least where you're making money maybe it's not the perfect job but you at least have the bills covered you have a little extra cash left over you're in a routine you've made some good friends you know you're feeling very comfortable when you get to that comfort comfortability level the boredom starts to creep in and that's very normal that's very natural because your brain knows what to expect next it knows what's coming you know we know we got that nine to five we know we have that dinner at the end of the week what else is going on that's when you need to create excitement for yourself and that's when the opportunity arises

for you to make your childhood dreams come true a lot of being in your mid-20s is just doing all the things you wanted to do as a teen and a child but never had the opportunity to do because you just you know things were in the way now guess what you have a little bit of an exposable income not much but enough to fund those hobbies and those experiences and you have the drive and the willpower to do so so i highly recommend if you're like i'm bored i don't know what to do i can't get off my phone i blah blah blah blah girl go pick up those hobbies you wanted to do at 8 or at 10 or at 12 or at 16 that's when you start doing those things that's when you start making those dreams come true and that's when life gets just a little bit more fun so I'm very excited for that

tomorrow but yeah honestly so as my boyfriend's been gone I truly I got into my edible era you guys I'm in my edible era I'm in my edible era where it's like I don't I've stopped smoking as much during the day because I do think it has like a numbing effect of just like it really just puts me out for the rest of the day I mean if I have to go clock in do a shift or if I have to go like essentially do nothing or just like clean all day sure I will smoke a little bit but on days where I have like shit to do like work to do I need to sit down and like lock in bitch I really try to avoid smoking during the middle of the day so I can keep that energy high keep my brain power high and keep it pushing but once like eight o'clock rolls around once the sun goes down i've been

cracking open an edible maybe an edible and a half and wow having a grand old great old time i'll tell you what when you haven't done edibles in a while and you do them for the first time the edible scaries are crazy like oh my god did i actually just get sedated instead i thought i was eating an edible why can't i move my limbs why is there a demon man in the corner but but if you can persevere through that scariness i love an evening edible that's my dad's vibe he's always been like an edible in the evening kind of guy and now i understand why because truly it'll give you like the best deepest bone chilling high ever and then you can just kind of like zone out scroll on your phone watch a good movie i watched three movies last night i

can't tell you the last time in my own home like outside of a movie theater i have actually sat down and watched a movie without pausing interrupted let alone three that's how you know the edible was kicking i was on my rom-com ship last night when my boyfriend's gone i love to watch a rom-com in the evening i love a rom-com i'm a rom-com girl all the way and i watched three new rom-coms last night i watched uh how to lose a guy in 10 days oh my god matthew mcconaughey ah i would do anything for him truly i watched sweet home alabama which is also a fire one and then you guys i watched the much anticipated movie experience of the year the materialist you guys first of all i'll watch anything with pedro pascal in it you put pedro pascal in a

movie i'm sat actually i'm on my knees okay like i'm ready please give me a tub of popcorn i'm locked in i'm not even blinking honestly i think i gave it two and a half stars on my letterboxd I'm trying to get my Letterboxd game up, guys. I think my Letterboxd name is Smoke Sash if you want to check it out. But yeah, I did give it two and a half stars. Before I saw it, I heard so many things like, oh, broke man propaganda, broke man propaganda. And I was like, okay, as a journalist, I need to sit down and watch this movie high as hell and give it a real authentic reading.

And I'll tell you what, it kind of is broke man propaganda. It's definitely, I'll tell you one thing. it is definitely not romance propaganda this movie did not serve romance it did not serve romantic it did not serve lovey-dovey it served oh my god do we have hope is there hope is there any hope at all for a woman to maybe check all the boxes because it was serving you might as well settle for what feels comfortable and that's really scary that's probably this this is probably actually number one horror movie of the year if i do say so myself bitch i don't give a fuck if pedro pascal has six inch metal rods in his legs to make him taller thank god and i'm happy to have

you here at six foot two now you know what i mean like i love that she was like no i can't be with you because you were short once hello girl anyways anyways if you need an edible movie to watch the materialist was good it was a little dark and spooky i mean thus is real life i get it you the people making movies want to make movies that commentary on real life experiences and the darkness of dating i'm we're already going through that we need a little bit of a distraction we want the romantic comedy a little kooky a little wild like making me giggle and kick my feet in the air that's what we're looking for the real world is scary enough don't make me relive the real world again in a movie where I'm trying to escape off this edible you know what I mean uh but that was

a vibe I had to watch it I had no choice honestly uh but that was a whirlwind of an evening last night I'll tell you what but yeah other than that haven't been up too much just living my best life doing my thing and sharing it with you guys which how lucky am i to be able to do so also thank you for all the love on the last episode i really appreciate it you guys are so sweet i love sharing my travels with you guys sorry there's no vlog i was just truly locked in on being a wild woman in the forest and i appreciate you guys for understanding me but i hope to do more like honestly just like alone trips in the future where i literally just bring you guys with me like I cannot wait I have so many fun things planned so many fun things coming now that I'm

home and able to kind of lock in a little bit more but I do appreciate all the love you've been sending me and just like I got so many good feedback on the so much good feedback on the last episode of people being like this is the dose of hope that I needed ah success that's truly all I want to bring to this podcast so love you all endlessly but enough of my yapping girls shut up the girls have questions that need to be answered let's get into them someone asked okay invalid valid of them i've seen a lot of friendships and relationships ending lately what's happening lol this is this post mercury retrograde um kind of revival and honestly listen retrogrades reveal everything you need to know through the chaos through the confusion

I do believe that it is a amazing time to really take accountability and take a real and raw look around at the lives around us and question is this what the fuck I want to do is this what I want to do am I in the right place is this the right person is this the right friendship is this the right job you know it really makes us kind of go to the deepest darkest depths so then we're able to actually look up and take a real accountable look at our lives in front of us and make the changes necessary so if you're somebody who's going through a breakup going through a hard time especially like maybe interpersonally or like you know you realize somebody's not right for you after a retrograde that's okay you're not making the wrong decision you are making the right

decision you saw the red flags you saw the things you didn't want to see the things that you don't want to accept in your life and you're deciding to move forward accordingly if you got broken up that's okay too you know like it sucks to get broken up with it sucks to be like oh holy shit okay this person doesn't want to be with me but at least they're not with you instead of being with you and hating you or like not wanting to be with you you deserve somebody who wants you fully and just because someone quote-unquote doesn't want you doesn't mean you're like less valuable or less of an individual it just means you know the meshing wasn't there the chemistry wasn't there and that is a okay you know what the one thing materialists got right

is the recipe to a good relationship you guys want the recipe to a good relationship number one attraction you've got to have attraction you can't be with somebody that you're not attracted to i mean i guess you can but is that a life you want to live like you want to be bouncing on it and looking down and like practically about to throw up no that's not the life I want for any of you guys I want you guys to find your partner hot sexy attractive amazing wonderful I want you to see their face and be like I need them inside of me or on top of me or somewhere near me ASAP you need attraction okay second thing chemistry attraction is not chemistry don't get it confused chemistry is necessary can you riff with each other can you

have a good time with each other is it easy to be around each other because you guys mesh well because you have good chemistry or is it like you're awkwardly sitting next to somebody that you don't know that's not chemistry please you need to be able to like get along with each other and i think that comes from just like similarities you don't have to have like all similarities but it does come from just like similar interests similar backgrounds similar ways of living last but not least what keeps the relationship alive desire i mean you have to have desire to be with one another you can't get bored you can't get complicit or complacent you can't get lazy you have to want the desire of winning them over constantly you have to have that desire of being

like well what's next what can we what can we do for each other next how can i lift this person up next what can i do now you know you have to have the desire to be with them if you have all three those things I think it'll survive but it is kind of hard to find all three of those things I know you'll hear a lot of women nowadays be like they need money no no no I mean if that's something in your box absolutely but I don't think that secures a positive healthy relationship immediately I think you need attraction chemistry and desire and if you're not seeing that especially post retrograde it's probably because you're not with the right person and that's okay it's okay to be with the wrong person it's okay to you know it's not even a mistake you live you learn you try

new things you tried on a new pair of pants a new relationship they don't fit that's okay are you gonna keep squeezing into those tight ass goddamn jeans or are you gonna find a pair that fits you it's simply that simple okay but yes with retrograde and then also end of summer end of summer i always see a lot of breakups um honestly anytime like we enter a new season um i see a lot of breakups so like summer going into fall fall going into winter you'll see a lot of them around the holidays where it's like okay but you're not taking seriously what I'm taking seriously when it comes to like family and life matters then you'll see a lot of breakups coming towards spring where it's like okay we survived winter together but at what cost like I want to bloom I want to

be a new person let's break up and then I see a lot of breakups going into summer where it's like oh wow it didn't get better during the spring I need to have a good summer let's break up I personally have been through two breakups and they happened one literally day before Christmas thank you for that text wow what an asshole so like you know end of winter kind of well I guess beginning of winter end of fall and then also my other breakup happened right at the beginning of spring where it was like survived winter but bitch at what cost what cost and can I keep dealing with this no absolutely not so it does just come with the change of seasons where we are looking back on this past season we are looking back at our experiences and we're asking ourselves

but did we have fun and if the answer is no change what the fuck is not making you have fun immediately please i'm begging you also it's back to school season i know i know scary you guys talk about achieving dreams i have been seriously thinking about going back to college not because I'm like oh I needed to a degree to get a job that's not what I'm focused on I kind of just want to do it to do it like if I think about it I've already done two years so I'm halfway through if I went back to college it would be like a junior and senior year but the money the money is always a hard question but I'm also like goddamn life's too short I might as well go get the degree I might as well I don't know I've been in the mood to learn and to grow and to strengthen

my brain because with the influx of ai usage it's stressing me out it really is stressing me out and i'm thinking about being like dementia on my deathbed and it's because i just use chachi pt instead of actually thinking for myself not that i'm doing that but it's like that's literally what's going to happen our our bodies are going to start rotting inside of us because we are not moving we are not like practicing our using our muscles or our brain or our organs or anything and it stresses me out so much like wally that movie when i was a kid i watched it and i was like a cute robot but also like wow the horrors of the future of being a human because that felt a little too real at eight years old for hannah i was like i cannot be in that goddamn spaceship

floating around not taking accountability of my life while earth rots below us that scares me and i do think knowledge is power i think knowledge is power unfortunately it is a luxury right now but if i can make space and room to afford that luxury or if you have made space and room to afford that luxury please do not take it for granted i understand like i dropped out and it wasn't because like oh college isn't for me no i actually really enjoyed college i mean even when i was sobbing in the library after being in there for 24 goddamn hours straight i still enjoyed college i really did like with being able to learn new things you know um get new perspectives new ideas like challenge myself in a really healthy and honest way i enjoyed college so

much it was just during covid i was in art school during covid and they made us do online art classes and i was like bitch i am paying a private tuition i'm talking a hundred thousand dollars a year i actually got a really good scholarship but like the average person's paying a hundred thousand dollars a year and you expect me to get on zoom to paint hell no hell no it's just not worth my money it wasn't worth my money I was a in-home nanny at the time it was not worth my balancing and also wasting money on this schooling so I dropped out that's why I did it because it just it didn't make sense for that point in time in my life valid of me but also I've been thinking so much about going back to college and if you're in college please don't take it for granted if

you're new to college if you're new to school if you're thinking about college go do it go challenge yourself go get out there girl we can make that that loan repayment back don't worry let's put it to the lowest amount possible every month like let's just get away little chunks at a time it's like a car payment but i do think investment in yourself will always pay off tenfold i will say if you want to play the game of college and win at it and come out with a fantastic job you have to treat it like networking you gotta network your ass off babe that's why those people are leaving with insane goddamn jobs it's because they went to their their professor's office hours every day made friends with them hung out with them connected with them got to know them and

then the professor was like no i can vouch for you you're an amazing person let me send your information over to this old colleague of mine who is now running this amazing company oh my old college friends sent you yeah fantastic boom you have the job that's how it works that's how the game of college works you need to be networking if you're worried about like the outcome of your job I know scary you I have to talk to people but honestly I do think most of the time you should be focused on just like betterment of self challenging yourself learning new things new perspectives it's so nice it's so beautiful it's so wonderful education is a privilege education is amazing everybody it shouldn't be a it shouldn't be a privilege okay like I think everybody should

have the opportunity to be educated at a fair and reasonable price honestly in reality free if we're really talking but yeah I've been thinking about it so much and I think if I went back I would do art history I think I would go back for an art history degree um the college I went to previously KCAI did not have an art history degree but I would probably do like painting and then minor in art history or something like that I don't know it's something I've really been thinking about it's August so like I would have to wait a whole nother year but we'll see if the itch is still with me next year and if I still have this much free time because I think it would be really fun and really amazing and if you're in college please please live it up enjoy

your life have a good time don't let the horrors get to you and remember to make some space for some fun put yourself out there everybody's new so just because you're feeling new doesn't mean you're out of place everybody's feeling the exact same way you are so utilize that to make some friends someone asked what did you drink in college so in high school i drank uv blue that was our go-to uv blue mixed with blue gatorade oh girl one time my friend got i don't think i've told this story before on the podcast we used to drink a lot in high school okay we were partying okay we were suburban girlies we were gonna party period and one night I remember we went out to this crazy party we were drinking drinking drinking drinking drinking the thing was we didn't like

not eat and then drink it was like we were eating and drinking so it was just always a mess if things got crazy so we went out to a party you know drinking a whole handle of uv blue between the four of us I remember we were so drunk but then we were like we need a pizza and they were like we're only doing deliveries so we went we parked in the pizza parking lot and we were like well can you deliver it to our car like that's how we there was no thoughts no feelings truly just like craziness and like I said with all my stories it's not advice it's truly just the experience that I had in life then we went back to my house and we woke up in the middle of the night my friend was laying on her back no I'm talking near-death experience laying on her back projectile vomiting

up onto her face i know trigger warning i'm sorry i'm sorry i hate to talk about vomit i know how it is but we literally like shot up out of our sleep like oh my god she's going to choke and die help her up clean her up she had the worst alcohol poisoning i've ever seen in a girly my other friend's like half asleep she's like can i have another blanket we're like bitch your friend is dying over here and you're worried about it being cold what the hell is going on but i remember the carpet in my basement was stained blue for a long time. My parents were like, what the hell is this? Like, what did you spill down here? Like, what's going on? I was like, I don't know. That's so crazy. That's like bright blue. It won't come out of the white carpet. That's insane. What is going

on? You tell me. You tell me. What'd you guys spill down here? Like, now in college, it was a little different. We would just drink whatever we got our hands on, which most of the time was either free drinks from the bar which please don't just be taking random drinks please be safe yes people get roofied watch your cups watch your friends cups if a man brings you a drink in a bar don't take it make sure you're watching that bartender pour it for them in front of you anyways I think I just drink mostly grain alcohol and vodka so like straight vodka or ever clear we drink a lot of ever clear in college scary real alcoholic hours i remember i threw a new year's eve party one time and at midnight i made a shot tower of all ever clear shots what

the hell was i on what was i on and i remember my parents came home because it was at their house and they're like yeah you could throw a party but like we're gonna come home at like 1 a.m and go to bed so just like be prepared that we're coming back home like we're not just gonna leave you here alone they showed up i was so blackout drunk i remember talking to them they're like okay well we're going to bed i was like okay y'all have a good night and i went outside and i immediately projectile vomited in their bushes like that was post ever clear shot for goddamn sure and then towards the end of my college experience that's when borgs came around i think borgs in my opinion as an alcoholic i think borgs are the safest way to drink if you do it correctly if you do it

correctly because i feel like when i was walking around a frat house i had a handle in my hand and it was like that's straight alcohol but at least in these borgs it's like half water and then you can adjust how much alcohol you want in it and you can add electrolytes if you want you can add some flavoring you know let's please put more water than alcohol i'm begging you but i do think it's kind of the best way that people i've seen the college people be drinking because at least you're getting water in at least it's not just all straight alcohol so thank god the drinky culture has gotten to a point where it's like no we need to be taking care of ourselves i mean still a borg is not the best but we were doing also like edward 40 hands but with wine bottles taped

to our hands what the hell was going on like looking back i'm like oh my god i have had such an extensive drinking history wow i've literally been drinking since i was like eighth grade eighth grade summer that's when we started drinking my organs need a break they need a break for sure two in five canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar raised matters on september 19th join thousands in toronto for the princess margaret cancer foundation walk challenge yourself friends and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research together we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer register today at pmcfwalk.ca oh my god love you love the pod everything blah blah okay

anyways um I wanted to ask you if you have any crazy smoking experiences because for some reason like it's an inside joke between me and my friend but whenever we're out somewhere smoking some weird shit will happen immediately so I'm just wondering if that happens to you too oh yeah always always always always and I don't know if it's just like the nerves that are making me hyper fixated on everything around me or if it's like the universe feels you shifting mentally and it's like let's fuck it up let's do something crazy but yes i think there's an anomaly where it's like i'm high and the craziest shit is going down around me for no particular reason that happened a lot on my girls trip especially with karen's we kept running into karen's everywhere

we went and it's like i'm so incredibly high at 8 a.m in this coffee shop drive-thru and you're trying to inch your car in front of us like waving your hand aggressively as if we were not here five minutes before you five minutes before you and you're trying to cut in line at 8 a.m bitch i'm so high i will get out of the car i do not care that and then also like you're at this restaurant so incredibly high and then also splitting a thing of margaritas and i think we were just like cackling too loudly about just like lived experiences and beating dead horses you know what i mean if there's one thing the girls love to do it's beat a dead horse and we were laughing a little too loud and the the lady next to us just goes where's our waiter i need the bill and it's

like whoa oh my god girl it's not that deep like we're just having a good time sorry you hate to see youth enjoying their youth okay but yeah there is always an anomaly of like i'm high and i'm in public which is already scary enough but then i do think the universe sometimes senses it and sends crazy shit your way always always always there's just like hectic shit happening and that's why i prefer to be edible high safe in bed cozy wrapped in my sheets but when i'm with my friends i'm a little more brave and we just be going high anywhere movie theaters restaurants walmart coffee shop girl when i'm with the girls and we're on vacation like i'm telling you we were smoking morning mid-morning afternoon mid-afternoon evening night tonight night night

night like we probably smoked like eight joints a day and it was so beautiful how to transform yourself like killing off the old you i think if you ask 22 year old hannah when she first started this podcast she'd be like you gotta get rid of that bitch you gotta gut her and get her out of system uh i was dealing with some demons at the time so sometimes that is how you have to go about transformation within yourself where it's like no no i gotta kill her i gotta take her out she can't exist anymore but i think now that i'm older and wiser there is something like not so healthy about being like i need to kill myself to transform like it does not need to be that deep dark scary it really really really does it I I think to transform and in a healthy healthy direction

and to get to a place where it's like no I'm actually finding real positive growth and transformation like you need to love yourself into that person you got to ask yourself like what love do I need now how do I need to what do I need to benefit now because once you start implementing those things once you start showing yourself that love and that place that you maybe didn't get it or bringing light to that darkness that you're too afraid to handle or implementing new positive changes and experiences into your life you will transform you will transform you don't need to die to transform you need to grow your wings you need to expand like a little caterpillar in a cocoon okay but yeah i have heard this notion of just like i need to kill this side

to myself i need to kill myself to you know do better to grow to have space and room to transform it does not have to be that crazy or that dark or that scary and i think it also limits growth and change because you're starting from a fresh slate of like nothingness when you should be starting with at least a base understanding of like what you do feel good about what you don't feel good about what you want to change what you want to transform what you want to implement and where you can show yourself some more love that's how you bring real transformation you are so articulate and well-spoken tips on getting a better vocabulary am i am i thank you oh my god that's like the best compliment ever because sometimes i'm speaking out loud and i truly am

like nothing's making sense words are just flowing out of me but nothing is adding up nothing is making sense so i'm glad that it's making sense to you and i'm glad i'm maybe using words that make me look smarter than i actually am but i do think most of my just like well-rounded understanding or maybe like use of words you know what it comes from reading yeah it comes from reading reading now reading in the past reading when i was a child like girl there was no ipad in the house there was no ipad in the sticky fingers there was books like why the hell such of like a fever dream i'm like my parents having to hide books from me at night because i would stay up and read them i was a book fiend me and the librarian locked in twin i was the first girl

to have my fingers on the hunger games book in my middle school that should transform me i was reading you know cute little kids books i was ready to get into something crazier i got my hands on hunger games i was like the world is opening up to me but i've always been i've always been a reader I really have I love reading I definitely fell off the past couple years where I haven't been reading as much but this year especially I've been committed to reading and reading different things different genres different types of literature like I read the new Hunger Games book last month I read like a poetry book this month I'm reading you know a more scientific understanding book like so many different ideas so many different perspectives

but I love reading I think it's really important for our brains to slow down every once in a while to really escape but in a healthy way and yeah you're going to gain so much knowledge from it you're going to be smarter for it you're going to be more well-rounded and more understanding for sure so read read read read read read oh but how do I put the phone down and read girl put the phone down put it in a different room put it away from you sit somewhere else go to a coffee shop go to a park get your brain somewhere else where you're able to dive into that book and also just like get a good book you don't have to read that like really hard read a million chapters book just because other people are doing it you don't have to read that book that's on book talk just because

other people are doing it if you're into the romance novels and the cheesy corny shit i love it i love it me too me too i don't care what you're reading i don't care what you're reading as long as you have a book in your hands and my goal every day is to at least read a chapter usually I'll read it at in the evening I'll start dinner dinner's on the stove cooking and then as it's cooking I have my glass of wine and I read a chapter of my book usually one chapter turns into eight turns into 30 turns into I'm up all night reading which is a really beautiful when you can get in that flow state please lean into it but I try and at least like hold myself accountable for just one chapter a day if i have the time if i have the space um but yeah bring

back reading what the hell i never thought that'd be a sentence on my mouth bring back reading the kids the kids are illiterate nowadays the kids don't know what's going on and that's our fault that's not their fault they're just children they're just doing what we tell them to do and like bitch could you imagine having an ipad and unlimited access to youtube youtube shorts at three at three years old my brain would be rotted out of my head are you kidding me it's not their fault it's not their fault their parents are putting an ipad in front of their face but it's our fault for not encouraging reading more often and i love the library shout out to my librarians out there the library has everything the library has so many references so many

recommendations so many different resources you can get move you can you can stream movies from the library at home like ebooks i've checked out like cameras from the library recording equipment things like that when i was real down bad broke like i can't afford a podcast mic bitch go rent one from the library i love community resources and we need to be using them we need to be showing up for them we need to be teaching the youth about them and we need to be reading because why is america illiterate someone said i don't want summer to end me either but summer isn't ending so you're fine you're fine you're fine there's this thing called a solstice and it has not happened yet babe do not give in to the fall propaganda quite yet it is still 95 degrees out

we can still finish summer on a high note summer in my opinion is not over until i've at least gone to the renaissance festival i've gone to a state fair and i've gone like peach picking peach picking or like blackberry picking that's the end of the summer fruits i've already gone to the state fair so that's one out of the three things but but renaissance fair is not until september cannot wait to get dressed up like a princess and get so incredibly drunk and then also i still need to go like peach picking or like end of summer fruit picking so i can kind of honor the season in that sort of way but girl we got time go out there live your best summer experience summer life take it all in now before it's gone yes oh don't scare x had a run home from a date because he

complained about his blue balls and how to jerk off while i waited i hate men i hate men i hate men i hate men i hate i hate men and it sucks because it's like once again like not to be pro man but like it's definitely not set up for them to succeed when porn is so addicting and so prevalent and so available especially like with unrestricted internet access like yes we're not set up for success but also like can we have some self-control can i say one thing blue balls don't exist blue balls don't exist oh you're a man you don't have balls i don't give a fuck blue balls don't exist blue balls are an excuse to pressure women into sexual activities and i don't want to hear about you or your blue balls because that sounds gross and i need you to leave my house now

like what is going on what is going on so many men jump scares oh and i have to you guys we had a confessionals episode but there was this girl who dm'd me after confessionals and she was like can you put this in the confessionals I was like I'm so sorry I missed this because it was actually the craziest thing I've ever read in my entire life and so of course I have to read it for you guys now oh my god I can't find it I can't find it but moral of the story is they'd been in a long-term relationship and she was like cleaning out his closet one day because like why have you cleaned out your closet in four years meanwhile I'm mopping the house every week women deserve more and she found a pocket pussy in his closet men are deranged and deprived he was like no no no

no i've only had it for a week i've only had it for a short amount of time if my man had a pocket put a hidden secret pocket pussy in his closet it would be him in the pocket pussy on the corner of the goddamn street and then she was like and then he went to reddit and you know talked about it and all the men on reddit are saying it's normal and fine to have in a relationship oh my god what happened to couples therapy reddit reddit is not couples therapy i will tell you that and men will go to every extent of the earth to be like no i'm not a bad person instead of just changing instead of just changing instead of just changing hmm instead of just being like maybe i shouldn't be fucking a porn star pocket pussy while my girlfriend sleeps next to me in bed i was like

no queen i'd be pissed i'd be beating him over the head with that fucking pocket pussy like and that's just me you do you but also like valid for being very upset very like what the hell what the hell what the hell use your hand jerk off like a real normal individual and i'm sure men be like oh well girls get all their toys they're gonna have vibrators they're gonna have dildos you're gonna have blah blah blah blah blah first of all shut up women deserve pleasure period if there is a plastic pussy existing in my house I'm gonna be pissed I'm gonna be pissed unless it's something for me I don't I don't need that around me I don't need that around me especially regarding the fact that like most of those pocket pussies are like formatted after a specific porn star

no no no I don't need a man that that brain rotted I do not need a man that brain rotted speaking of someone asked thoughts on your partner watching porn here's the thing I'm not gonna sit here and be like you can't do this i think in a relationship you can't be like you can't do this i don't think that's fair to your partner but i do think you should have non-negotiables in a relationship like there should be things where it's like no they can do this but if they do it then i don't want to be with them that's how it works in a relationship you can't set rules and boundaries where it's like no you're not allowed to do this it's like no they're a human they can do whatever they want but it's your choice whether you want to be with a partner who does that shit

or not do you know what i mean and i and this is gonna be crazy of me to say but like now that i'm older i'm like i don't care if my partner watches porn i don't i don't want to know about it i don't want to know about it i don't want the the watching to be so much where a you're like not having sex with me or not attracted to me or can only get off to porn or can only get off to weird crazy shit or like we're having sex and it's for hours because you fried your nervous system i don't want that bullshit going on i don't want you sneaking off to bathrooms i don't want you sneaking off having to jerk off somewhere randomly saying you blew balls and leaving the date to go jerk off like it can't be a problem you can consume it casually sure i don't care

don't i don't want to know about it but it cannot be a problem it cannot be a problem i don't fuck with that i don't do that like if you as a real life real life real life woman are having to fight with a fake woman online like fake pussy online that is a battle that is not worth your time or energy like at all at all let him go jerk off alone in his parents house in his parents basement not in your house that's for sure drunk texted a man i ruined a good breakup that's okay you were drunk you can just forget it just pretend it didn't happen pretend it happened and you know what you were in your lover girl era you were drunk you were feeling the love you were wanting to share it with people and how dare you not share the love to people me trying to like emphasize

it's a like bad drunk habits i feel you on this i feel you on this i feel like i've always been a drunk like making bad decisions kind of girl sorry i'm just a girl i like to have a good time i like to get silly and wild but beautiful part of the story is you are not the first woman in the world to get drunk and text their ex so it's okay low-key i would just pretend it didn't happen delete the message block it out that happened are we sure that happened i don't know if that happened you know and also i'll never blame you for being a lover girl and i'll never blame you for being like but i miss them it's okay to miss them it's okay it's okay to share that with them maybe not all the time maybe accidentally sure who can hate a lover girl but we've all been there so

don't stress yourself out too much two and five canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar raised matters on september 19th join thousands in toronto for the princess margaret cancer foundation walk challenge yourself friends and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research together we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. Hi, Hannah. Okay, so on Wednesday, it was my 21st birthday. I ended up celebrating with all my friends, and I invited my coworker, who I have a crush on, which I know, I know, I know, I know. We should not shit where we eat. I am a full believer of that, but I do believe that there are some exceptions, and

especially like the job that i work at now it wouldn't be like a big problem like they basically wouldn't care if we got together like my corporate wouldn't care and also like like i said i just feel like in some cases they're an exception anyways i invited him he came over it was a great time like we were definitely kicking it up and i'm just like i felt like you know i felt the vibes i feel the vibes but but i'm like i said i invited my friends and i have this one friend who's one of my very close friends actually but in the beginning of like me meeting her i had feelings for her and there were definitely points where like it seemed like we were talking but then she would kind of like when we would like talk about like maybe going on a date even though we

never called it that like that's what it was giving she would always ghost me and then there would be like at least like two or three times where that would happen and then she would like pop out like saying like she was like talking to somebody else and because it was never serious I never like confronted her about it but she basically confirmed because I ended up getting really drunk and then she sent a text that I wasn't supposed to see so then after everybody left from the party she like drove back and came back and we ended up talking about it and she basically told me like from the get-go that she had feelings for me which I'm kind of like oh love to hear that but also like you kind of said this eight months ago like we could have already been

a thing because now like i fear i have moved on from it and i do really like my co-worker but it's like i really care about my friend and also like oh i forgot to mention this part but when she did come back obviously like i said i was drunk and we were in the moment and we did end up hooking up so now i feel like it's kind of changed the dynamic of the friendship which is really really unfortunate because like my biggest fear with all of that was I didn't want to lose her as a friend but now I'm kind of like stuck and I feel like I'm like a standstill like I don't know what I don't know what to do so what do you think queen and also just want to say I love you been a long time listener and you have just helped me grow into a woman that I love

and I could rant about how much I love you but don't want to take up all the time of the podcast so that's all please let me know what you think love you have a beautiful day love all the podcast baddies too and bye okay best case scenario here three-way is that crazy of me is that crazy of me maybe but here's the thing she confessed her feelings she's like i should have i should have i should have woulda coulda y'all hooked up i don't know how you forgot that happy to have that information y'all hooked up I don't think it ruins the dynamic because I do think a lot of friends be hooking up you know especially like I don't know it just happens sometimes especially when like friendship does include love and it can be confused for romantic experience um if that hook

up happened and you were not like head over heels I don't think it's like a connect I don't think it's a connection that I want to be you know putting my time towards right now um especially if you have like more of a crush on your co-worker then like yeah i would say just like kind of pretend it didn't happen and if she brings it up not like in a mean way but just like we had her fun we did our little cute little kiki i don't think you have to be like i don't want to be around you romantically but i do think you could be like i think we're better off as friends you know i am pursuing other connections right now um i do want to keep you in my life as a friend blah blah blah but yeah like i said best case scenario you guys just have a three-way i don't

know if she's into that but like could be fun that's toxic of me though and yeah it is hard to choose but like period you have options we love an option we love you know just like being into people and exploring your options and taking your time and all those fun things so don't stress it out if you want to explore both absolutely but i wouldn't lead her on like you guys have already hooked up you've already been around her long enough that if it's like you aren't feeling everything fully then don't waste her time being like sure i wanna i wanna explore this you know it's like okay liar just say you're not into it and you just want to keep friends because you have a different connection that's stronger period how to deal with mean girls in your late 20s when you

just want to be their friends oh first of all you can't win the mean girl over you can't here's my perspective on mean girls okay i think when you you know you're younger you're in high school you're in middle school mean girls are more prevalent because um you know insecurities are on the rise hormones are on the rise life experience is at a full-time zero so it's very easy to be a mean girl i will never like i don't like a mean girl and like yes i hope you change but i understand the perspective of a mean girl maybe in like high school or middle school because it's like they're going through it that's why they're mean but when you are in your 20s or 30s or 40s and you are a mean girl there is no goddamn excuse at all there's no excuse truly i don't care

what you're going through i don't care what stressors you have i don't care you know like i care about you and your perspective but you cannot take your anguish and anxiety and insecurity and place it on under on other people that is not allowed in the adult world that does not fucking fly with me because we're two mature adults or maybe one at this point but like at this point time of our lives we have had so much life experience and so much understanding in ourselves that we owe each other the decency of kindness period what happened to kindness bring back kindness hello so if you encounter a mean girl in your 20s there isn't there's no use even bothering there really isn't keep minimal contact do not engage if fighting only makes it worse

because then they feel like they have the upper hand or they feel like they need to you know go harder on you it is just not worth the mental battle and the mental games and the reason they do that is because they're so miserable they want to make everybody else around them miserable truly that's it every adult that i've met in my life in my adult experience which is minimal who is so incredibly mean or rude or not understanding or aggressive or any sort of like negative emotion constantly it's not because of me it's not because of me because they do that to everybody and they do it to everybody because they do it to themselves constantly and the only way i can feel is not angry or upset it's just kind of like oh that's really sad for you oh god never put me in

a position where people go wow that's really sad for you bitch something's got to change if I ever get there something has to change immediately but that's how I feel that's how I feel it's not worth engaging I had this old manager who was definitely like this like 30 year old mean ass bitch bitch you have a six-year-old how are you gonna be a mean bitch and have a six-year-old aren't you supposed to be like I don't know some sort of example for your child anyways she started off this relationship really weird where it was like we're gonna be best friends I love you so much we're gonna be best friends and she did that so I could get close to her so then when she said rude things she could follow it up with like

love bombing very weird very weird energy but she was just like mean and rude I have never cried that much in my entire life in a walk-in cooler like that should not be happening but it got to the point where i was like why am i engaging with her why am i engaging with her even if i engage positively negatively i've tried every single direction i've tried neutrality i've tried understanding i've tried being her therapist i've tried because one thing about me i'm gonna try i'm gonna try and have a good relationship i'll do i'll do my best but sometimes you have to learn those mean girls are not worth fucking with because no matter what you do they're gonna hate period like we as women have it hard enough i think we owe it to each other to at least

try and stick together and have understanding but yeah i hate a fucking mean girl and it's not worth your time or energy if you encounter them like truly pretend they don't exist i know that kind of sounds like mean girl energy but it's like when you have a slot machine in front of you and every coin you put in there is going to give you like negative money why would you even put coins into it do you know what I mean does that euphemism work anyways I do love women I love women because women are amazing and most of them are amazing wonderful incredible and they okay first of all I love having girly friends because every time we come like every time I come home for vacation or just even hanging out with my girls I leave with so many more tips and

tricks that's why I love this podcast because I'm like no let me share my tips and tricks with you guys i nared my entire body yesterday my friend on vacation was like oh my god you guys i get the worst ingrown hairs but like feel how smooth my arm is i don't shave my arms but i felt her i felt her arm and i was like girl what the hell how did you get that did you shave she's like no no no i use v i use v sensitive skin i lather my whole body in it i leave it on for like six minutes and then like it says i scrape it off and then i exfoliate with an african net sponge you guys i said say no more the amazon order is already on the way don't even worry about it so yesterday the trial happened and i was nervous because i was afraid a it's gonna smell horrible awful

chemically my entire house is gonna be like oh who what acid spilled in here you know what i mean what chemical dumping ground is going on in this girl's apartment did not want that so i was nervous about that but luckily it didn't have a horrible awful smell it didn't burn no ingrown hair so far feeling good feeling as smooth as a little baby seal who just slipped out of its mother we'll see about the ingrown hairs i don't know i'm worried i read so many reviews because i just get anxious so i start reading reviews on things and some people are like no it caused way more ingrown hairs so we'll see but for now i'm telling you it's like i'm a fucking plastic slip and slide right now yeah thank you girls for putting me on that plus the african nut sponge

where it's like not only ripping out the dead hairs but also exfoliating every layer of skin off of your body i followed by argan oil body butter you guys amazing incredible i love women their ingenuity is truly something to be admired because who would have thought about using v on your whole entire body anyways thank you girls for that tip because that was amazing how to travel cheap i want to prioritize traveling in my 20s if you guys want to see more photos i just uploaded like a bunch of hiking photos i'm uploading a bunch of reels and like the last of like my photo dumps from vacation so check them out at hannah marlene on instagram but honestly i think i'm a bougie traveler i am i am there are ways i can cut back money there are cheaper places to stay

absolutely i just am at the point in time in my life where it's like i know what i want and i if i book it far enough ahead i can usually make it happen um but you can travel like honestly anywhere relatively for very very very cheap and i learned this because one of my cousins is a um a national parks ranger in yellowstone and her and her boyfriend they'll just take off for a week like they'll get the little vacation you know it'll be off season they'll just take off for a week and live out of their car live out of their car camp cook over a stove eat cheap meals like if you are really too like willing to get down low and dirty you can travel for very cheap if you're willing to stay in a hostel if you're willing to eat ramen five nights a week like you could probably

do it for under a hundred dollars honestly really and if you plan ahead far enough in advance you can always travel for cheap like even going to tokyo i'm thinking about where it's like you have to spend money period you know you have to book a hotel you have to book a flight those are non-negotiables it's going to cost me money but our flights were relatively very very inexpensive and that's because you know i planned far ahead in advance i was watching those airline tickets like it was nobody's business waiting for it to drop i remember for a while it was like twelve hundred dollars for one person round trip I'm not doing that I don't need to go to Tokyo that bad but then one day randomly it dropped from twelve hundred to seven hundred dollars oh I'm not

fucking around I booked those tickets immediately immediately that's very cheap for a round trip ticket to Japan and back that is very very cheap but it's like I took my time I planned ahead I was watching it if you make the right adjustments accordingly you can travel for very cheap travel does not have to be luxurious expensive it can be if that's what you're going for but if you're going for the experience for the thrill ride like girl you need a backpack a license a hope and a dream that is truly all you need to travel and maybe like a gun i mean like maybe at least like some bear spray or a taser or something just to keep yourself safe safety is number one always no matter where you go even if you're in a hostel even if you're like you know in a relatively

well-lit area please priority safety number one take care of yourself always don't put yourself in sketchy situations for the excuse of just saving five dollars i would rather you pay the five dollars and be safe than trying to save five dollars that bad do you know what i mean but yes and i think a lot of my traveling coming up i mean at least post japan will be very um inexpensive traveling like i'm hoping to convert my mazda into more of like a car camping situation where if i want to take off to colorado and just like be in the mountains for three days and sleep out of the back of my car i can do that you know what i mean and sure the initial investment into car camping will be a little pricey i don't know i feel like i can get a mattress topper for like

10 bucks in a fitted sheet and call it a day you know but i am planning on doing a lot of more relatively inexpensive traveling so when i do do traveling traveling vlogs in the future i'll do a cost breakdown always like for my japan trip i'm already writing down my cost breakdown but i think total flights round trip were 700 because that was planned in advance and then hotel individually i think it was like 500 for a week i know i know i know and it wasn't like the most biggest best bougiest hotel ever but it was in like good location good price range adequate reviews cool i'm sold i'll be there i think you can travel cheap and i think you can travel on a very low savings but i do not think you should travel on credit i do not think you should be traveling on

a credit card i don't think you should be doing anything on a credit card that is outside your means of what you can pay for ever that's how they get you that's how the system traps you and i don't need anybody trapped by the system please this is so funny how is your fish doing what a sweet question i do have a fish his name is louie he's blue so i was like maybe bluey but then like that's the dog so i don't want to do the dog so his name's louie and he's doing so good i love plants so i have like a full planted freshwater fish tank we did have a casualty last week where i did have a snail die but snails are so unpredictable i've always had snails in my fish tanks i'm such a weirdo bitch like i love my weird little hobbies and one of them does

happen to be like having a fish tank um but he's doing so good i have so many little plants in there i found this cute little niche fish store that's been helping me out so much but it's been really beautiful because a i know i shouldn't shop at petco for fishes but every time i go in there to get cat food i would feel so bad for the fishes on the wall so i was like okay i want a fish tank and i want to save one of the fishies so i saved him but when i got him he was all white he was all white fish that's not why i picked him he just looked like he needed a lot of tlc he was very skinny why can i see your bones i'm concerned but when i brought him home he's turned into this bright fluorescent blue and red fish and i'm like oh my god it makes my heart so happy also

like kind of sad because it's like i read online that their colors get so dull when they're in these places because they're so depressed but their colors really flourish and brighten when they're happy and healthy so i'm like oh louie thank god i'm so happy you're enjoying your little tank because i do be putting some work into that tank i'll tell you what but i love having a fish loving and having a fish i love being off an edible and staring at my fish tank there's truly nothing better truly and also danger loves it too there was some time where i i've always had fish around danger and he's always been good to the point where he's like i'm not gonna like get the fish but i'll try and there's times where he was waking me up in the middle of the night

with a wet paw like tapping on my face i'm like oh hell no this isn't gonna work this is not gonna work so i put a stuffed animal up by the fish tank and he stopped getting up there because i think he's like intimidated or whatever but no danger is good around the fish and the fish is doing good thank you for asking my little family what leads you to continue when all you want to do is give up oh my god you know what it always gets better and you have to hit the low point to sometimes see the future or you have to hit a low point in order to get higher does that make sense does that make sense but every time i've gone low i've immediately gone so much higher always always and the only reason i'm able to like sit comfortably with that now is because i've hit so many low points and

gotten out of them and gotten to a better place to the point where i'm like okay no this is just say universal truth but when I was younger and I wasn't aware of the universal truth and I was more so just like oh my god no I'm just at such a low place this is like fact so I must believe that it's going to happen for the rest of my life because I don't have any lived experience that was really hard for me to believe that things could get better it was very hard for me to believe that but once you go through it enough times and you're like a girl I can't do that that many times don't worry don't worry you'll get through it and like I said it does get better you do come out on top every time but once you go through it enough times it is just kind of a universal truth of like

no no it does get better life always gets better it does if you put the effort and the work and the just simply trying into your life and standing beside yourself and you know attempting to take it not only just one day at a time but just like one step further every day you will live a successful positive thriving life i promise you but also we're in our young 20s and that's when the trials and tribulations really come through so i'm holding on for the stability of my 30s truly but i know that me going through these ups and downs these low points and subsequently the high points are what builds the stable base of what will be my 30s so please hold on please keep going it does get better i promise you like it is a universal fact so don't even worry about how

just understand it will college girl girl attire staples um a really really comfy clothes you can wear to class i was not the girl who was dressing up for class i was the girl unless i had a crush but i was mostly the girl who was in like matching two-piece set especially at 8 a.m 8 a.m class after being just so incredibly hungover like practically waking up at a frat house and then going to class yeah no no no i'm in a two-piece set like a workout set and a hat bam good enough as long as you're there who cares about your outfit but then you need going out outfits and honestly all of my going out outfits were just really tiny tops that made my tits look fantastic and then either shorts or jeans I don't think you should go to like frat parties or parties in

general in a skirt because you're gonna be like uncomfortable unless you vibe in skirts I don't vibe in skirts I need my pussy covered from front to back like for safety reasons so I love a good pair of like jeans like really cute jeans that make your ass look great or shorts they could be any kind of shorts like cute little micro shorts high-waisted denim cut off um like adam sandler shorts who cares and then shoes that you can get fucked up really comfortable tennis shoes you can get fucked up no one's going to the club in heels in college unless you live in like new york city then congratulations that's more of like a once you graduate college then you'll be going to the club and heels but no frat parties you need a comfortable pair of shoes in my college days it

was white air force ones now i feel like you could throw on a pair of like adidas or doc martens like platform docs and call it a day but you need comfortable shoes some sort of bottom that's secure and then like really tight teeny tiny go out top my go out top place for shopping is princess Polly not sponsored it's just it's truly where I've been shopping the most at recently do you have any Halloween costumes in mind yet not me being like no no don't worry summer's not over yes I've ordered three Halloween costumes yes I've ordered three Halloween costumes and no I will not spoil them but I know it's a hallow weekend so I do need to like I'm like prepping mentally where I'm like I need at least two for the weekend you know one for Friday which Halloween's on and then

one for Saturday if I still have the energy to go out Friday or Saturday or maybe like the Thursday before Halloween either way I need two Halloween costumes because I am quick to change my mind I'm quick to you know be like no I don't want to wear this and then do something else so I always have two different vibes and then I need one for this podcast last year or like previous Halloween costumes what have I been oh last year I was Pamela Anderson and then also I was a nun for our confessionals episode the year before that I was Alice in Wonderland because I went to a rave and that just makes sense like girl down the rabbit hole let's fucking go and then before that I have been Sailor Moon and then honestly I can't think of anything else before that because like in

college it was like I have cat ears on and I'm calling it a day you know like I'm not going all out that is for fucking sure but yes I am prepping the Halloween costumes my listen I'm a planner I plan ahead I make sure all bases are covered and I don't want it to be a week before Halloween and I'm panicked trying to buy something online but it's not even in my size but it's the only costume I want I don't play those games I don't I do plan ahead I do order ahead and always there's always a deal if you plan ahead like I said you want to save money plan months in advance there's always a deal and I love Halloween I do but like I said I gotta wait I have to indulge in the last bits of summer or else we're bringing on way too much winter for us all don't get too excited fall's

gonna make its way here shortly but i don't need to be hanging up bats around my house just yet anyways you guys i hope you've enjoyed this a little bit longer of an episode but i just wanted to get on here and hang out and just kiki with the girls i miss answering questions and seeing what's on your minds i'm proud of you all for surviving the retrograde please remember life sends us lessons in the funniest way and if we do not desire to learn them life will force us to learn them so you might as well learn them on your own time instead of having it be a major inconvenience aka mercury retrograde if you're going through a breakup hold on girl there is love out there that is meant for you do not watch the materialist if you need a dose of hope and

inspiration for your love life it is not the vibe for that at all it's the end of summer i fear we're all just doing the best we can we're trying to grow and glow in our most beautiful individual ways in order to kind of preserve that life force energy for winter but we're not going to bring up the big bad winter yet we're going to live out this summer the best we can we're going to have a fantastic fall and i cannot wait to see where it brings us please more collins you can dm me your voice message on my instagram at instagram.com slash hannah marlene i also am posting so so so much there lots of real lots of cooking things you guys know where to find me at hannah marlene if you want your question answered if you're like in my dms like she never sees them join the patreon

join the patreon i answer every single one of your questions over there i'm not even kidding every single one i think last week we had like 55 questions that i went through and i will give you the time energy that you're desiring i'm sorry if i miss you guys i do try the best that i can but i when i tell you i get like thousands of questions every single week like i'm trying to pick things that are usually i feel like more than one people more than one person is asking so it's more of like a collective adjustment but if you want your question answered come join the patreon patreon.com slash smokes as shawty we have so much fun over there lots of fun little extra things that i submit with you guys you guys have loved the book that i'm reading um braiding sweet grass and i do

do a book club every week on the patreon or every month on the patreon where i introduce you guys to the book that i'm reading for that month just to hold myself accountable and you know maybe provide some inspiration for you guys as well but so many fun things over there so many extras and i do answer all the questions and yeah if you want to see more from me follow me there but with that being said stay sane stay sexy and i'll see you all so soon Two in five Canadians will hear the words, you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk.

Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca.