Smoke Sesh - craving the chaos, casual sex & cutting people off

Episode Date: August 8, 2023

Helloooooooo all my hotties across the world, so excited to be back with another episode of smoke sesh! Today is the Lions Gate Portal a master manifesting day so I wanted to start off the episode strong with some affirmations and tips on how to celebrate the day, we get right into your questions starting off with what to do after getting cheated on, how to get out of your comfort zone, my favorite good weed moments, am I going insane? and battling teen hormones, go to underwear brand, craving the chaos and how to let the demons out, apartment living and what to buy before moving, people pleasing is killing you, can people really change? controlling boyfriends, blocking and moving on, kombucha! Casual sex, festival tips, battling procrastination, “backdoor” tips and tricks, cutting people off, and are we too comfortable with running away? best way to study, not dating to marry, and much much more! Love you all so much if you want to keep up with the pod and what I’m doing follow me on instagram @ hannahmarlene and I’ll see you all again next week! MUAH!

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know? Just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash. So come hang out! Let's light up and talk everything there is to life. The good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing. I've got a story for it all. hello oh my goodness good morning hotties of the world how are we doing are we feeling rejuvenated rested feeling ready to fucking go i know a lot of you guys are making big changes right now in your life going back to school entering a new era that's why we had a confessionals episode last episode which if you did not catch go listen to it was wild it was probably one of

my favorite episodes we've done in a while it was very on brand because that day that we did it was like a very big collective shift um and a big day for release and i was like i love i love that we all got to release together on the podcast and get things off our chest so we can become new and you know move forward with our lives with our best foot forward and we're kind of doing the same thing again today um today is the Lionsgate portal if you don't know what that is it is like a big day for manifestations um it's like just a great day for abundance and really focusing on what you want who you want to become and not really taking any bullshit and going after it um so I'm very excited to get on here and kind of participate and share a little bit with you guys. I just put

a post up on Patreon on how I am specifically celebrating that, but a very simple way for you guys to really get into the Lionsgate portal and, you know, focus on your manifestations is simply coming up with some affirmations. I love a good affirmation. Like, I am lucky. I am wealthy. I am loved I share love with everybody around me simple things like that and a lot of I am statements as well those are my favorites because as soon as I enter maybe a bad headspace or you know I'm not feeling too great or you know you get those negative thoughts in your head or maybe you get off track a little bit these are very simple statements so you can easily bring right back up and kind of re-center your brain around and move forward on a better path but if you want to get a

little bit deeper into it and you're a little bit crazier like I am and you really want to you know take time to spend time with yourself and get to know like what do I want to manifest what do I want to bring into my life here's a really good little journaling tip for you all um first of all you're going to get out get out your journal all right get your pen this is your homework for the day and I know I'm assigning you homework within the first three minutes I'm so sorry but I just wanted to cover it before we got into everything else um but you're going to get a pen piece of paper what you're going to do in that piece of paper papers journal whatever the fuck is you are going to make a detailed and I mean detailed like as detailed as you possibly can let your

imagination run wild of who you want to be in wherever you see future you maybe it's five years maybe it's 10 years maybe it's 30 years whatever I like a good five-year mark because it keeps me still in the present but still kind of in the future write out who that person is what they do what they are looking forward towards um who they've become what do they do in the morning what's their daily routine like what do they wear what do they look like where do they live what do they have around them what do you see this visualization technique is so fucking powerful because last time I did it on the Lionsgate portal I wrote down who I wanted to be in five years what I was doing and literally within the span of one year I looked back and I was like holy shit

I am literally living that life like I wrote down I am in a beautiful apartment with all wood floors with giant windows surrounding me I'm surrounded by plants and life I am doing art and being creative for a living I am surrounded by love like very simple little things that I was writing down and I was reading it and then I was like looking up around me and I was like oh wow I did that you know I did that like I am living in that reality and it's kind of shocking um but that's my number one favorite manifestation technique so quickly as we dive into this pod I'm gonna get this in your brains early on so you can celebrate the Lionsgate portal with me today um but yeah that's kind of what I will be up to I really wasn't up to anything crazy this week oh my god I was every

weekend I have like a little Sunday routine and I talked about this um on the last pod like on my days off i really try and make them like a day off like i'm not fucking thinking about work bitch i'm not on the clock i'm not thinking about work that's for fucking sure so i really try and make sure that i have a good like day off routine in in place so i'm not just like sitting around on my days off and then i'm at work and then i'm like panicking because i'm like i didn't do anything on my day off like no i really want to take advantage of these so i have a really good day off routine which is usually like wake up sleep in have some coffee put on a cute outfit go to the farmer's market get my favorite lunch yada yada yada you know like very simple cutesy

little shit i was doing my little routine and i went to my favorite lunch spot which is called hibashi house i talk about all the time it's like this amazing mediterranean spot i go to it every sunday um and i was walking upstairs to go to the bathroom and i heard someone go hey and i was like what and i looked down and they go not to be a fan boy and they whipped their phone around and it was literally my podcast playing on their airpods i was like oh this has made my fucking day this is so cute i thought they were gonna be like i was going to the bathroom and it's like a one stall i thought they were gonna be like hey girl i really gotta piss like please can i go before you but no is even better they were like i'm listening to your podcast right now illy i love that i love

having encounters like that so thank you guys for supporting me thank you for being here uh it is just amazing to go through this journey of life with you guys and help each other a little bit along the way you know with that being said i'll stop rambling i know why you're here i know we have a lot on our minds there's a lot going on especially with school starting things switching up people having to take new routes okay with the lionsgate portal and venus being in retrograde a lot of shit is getting uplifted twisted turned flipped upside down and starting over um like suddenly and this is a blessing okay I promise you I promise you I promise you it's a blessing okay people like to think that and I was this kind of person but people like to think that

when major changes happen in their life if they're not good positive changes then it's not going to have a positive outcome but let me tell you i have been in some of the craziest wildest situations ever and a little scary a little oh that was i'm a little nervous like not a positive change but they had the most positive outcomes because i'm the kind of person who has a really hard time with change and enacting change within my own life and so if i sit there constantly being like well i really want this to happen but i'm not gonna get up and do it the universe will be like okay bitch well i'm gonna do it for you and it's gonna be in a way that you could have never possibly imagined okay then i'm fucking running into a cop car going 75 miles an hour on a highway

at 3 a.m because they parked in the middle of fucking highway and totaling my car and then my you know ex is randomly breaking up with me on a day we're supposed to go to a concert and now I'm running around at 2 a.m by myself on molly like crazy shit starts happening not good high emotional things these are things that I thought were going to be negative impact impacts on my life and we're going to have very negative you know repercussions but actually became some of the biggest blessings ever so if you feel like your life is getting tipsy turned upside down it's it a little crazy and not crazy in a way that you really like just hold on to the raft okay stay in the raft if you get thrown over just crawl back in the raft because the water will clear

it'll settle you will see crystal clear smooth waters soon okay i promise and you'll look back and you'll be like wow thank you wasn't how i was imagining it was gonna go but it it happened for the best and i'm glad that i got through it and i'm glad that i'm here and i learned so i can be a better person and move forward hold on girlies you're getting there good things are coming you just gotta hold on to the raft oh my god this yesterday was a whirl fucking wind a whirlwind once again universe keeping me on my toes oh anyways i forgot to post the questionnaire until like 8 p.m i was like oh i knew there was something i was supposed to do today i was like i hope uh people remember to submit questions 3 500 of you guys submitted questions i was like whoa the girls

they they got the memo they're here they're ready to get crazy on the pod and i know we're here for i'm gonna try to try to get through as many as i possibly can i'm gonna take a little rip of my pen real quick girl breakfast i'm literally drinking an iced coffee and hitting a pen at 10 30 10 30 is early enough right anyways let's get into it girls oh someone asked how to act or what to change after getting cheated on love you by the way love you sorry you had to deal with that that is super fucking unfair to you but there's nothing you have to change about yourself you know there's nothing you should change and there's no specific way you're supposed to act I feel like that's definitely the mindset people have after they get cheated on like oh my

god it's my fault but no you know whose fault it is it's your ugly ass partner who has awful morals who didn't take you into consideration and in turn is not a good partner for you to be with okay it is one million percent their fault i don't care if they try to guilt trip you i don't care if they try to be like well you did this so i did this i don't give a fuck frankly okay they cheated on you so they don't deserve any contact people know in relationships relationship 101 okay you cheat you lose fucking contact non-negotiables okay i know you love them i know you have loved them but after someone hurts you to that level like that extent because cheating is insanely hurtful you have to understand that idealized version of them that you have in your head of

the person who, you know, wouldn't cheat on you and does fully love you and treats you kindly simply doesn't exist. And the person in front of you showed you who the fuck they are. And the difference between miserable people and un-miserable people are the un-miserable people notice when bad things are happening. Ooh, I don't like that person's behavior. Oh, they hurt me. Oh, this is going wrong and instead of letting it continue go wrong they get up they make a change in their life and they extract the negativity directly from the source and if that means getting rid of your loser cheating boyfriend then it means getting rid of your loser cheating boyfriend you're amazing you're beautiful you're wonderful there's nothing you did wrong you are deserving of a partner who

loves you and respects you okay basics basics okay it is not asking a lot to ask your partner to not fuck around with someone else on you so lose the man focus on you have a lot of fun and when it comes to future relationships sometimes it's easy to have walls up after things like this happen and of course you should watch out for red flags but don't let it get in the way of you finding love don't become you know cut off from the world because of this still open yourself up to love um but understand you weren't deserving of that okay you really aren't and i'm so sorry and i love you stepping out of comfort zones like specifically trying new hobbies slash clubs i've learned in life there's people who are addicted to adrenaline and me personally i don't

have to jump out of an airplane in order for my heart to reach high speeds sometimes i simply just have to step out of my house and talk to a new person like it literally feels like i'm jumping out of an airplane so sometimes that means trying new clubs and things like that i was a little deterred from because it did get me a little bit worked up or a little bit too in my head you know but then I realized just like the same way people jump out of airplanes is it's all about practicing that like how to work with your mind and not let your mind take over does that make sense and that just means the more you practice the easier it'll get the more you step out of your comfort zone the easier it'll get the more you try new things the easier it'll get but unfortunately

it just takes making that one step and continuing to make steps after that when you're nervous that doesn't inherently mean that there's something wrong or bad or negative that's going to happen. I know those nerves can make you feel like that, but when encountering anything that's new, you're going to feel that way, whether the new is good or bad. I get the same feeling before a job interview the same way I feel before a big concert. One's a little scary, not necessarily bad, but a little bit more high pressure. The other one is like a very big fun event, yet I still feel the same way so don't let that high anxiety high nerves deter you from good expansive things do you know what i mean that feeling is very very normal the more you feel it and the more you try and work

through it the easier it'll be for you to self-regulate and then basically you will be like those pros who have jumped out of an airplane a million bajillion times but sometimes it just takes trying something new and I encourage you to try something small so maybe it's oh I go to this coffee shop with my friends all the time but I'm gonna go there alone for the first time ever or I'm gonna go try a new coffee shop for the first time ever alone or I am going to with a friend go to this club event or maybe I'm gonna go to this club event alone but you know you slowly start with one step and then another and then another and you just keep moving up the ladder and it'll become so much easier the more you simply try to push yourself out of your comfort

zone and if you have a hard time doing it find a friend who will go with you even if just like a random person you've met in class who you happen to spark up a conversation and you both really enjoy bees or something like that be like hey girl i know we don't know each other but there's a beekeeping club would you like to go to the meeting with me boom now you get to step out of your comfort zone and you have somebody to go with you maybe it's a long-term friend that you can bring with you that always makes it easier as well i finally got to the point where i can go to places alone and try things alone and that feels really really nice but it all comes from practice so don't hold yourself back don't let that feeling or that anxiety hold yourself back

um you will be able to discover so many amazing beautiful things simply by putting yourself out there and if you don't put yourself out there guess what those amazing beautiful things will never find you so seek reach outwards beautiful things will come from it i promise someone said i know you've talked about bad such embarrassing weed moments but what about your best moments my best moments when i'm high are just like when i'm alone ascending in my room like in a cute robe doing my makeup with music on taking selfies those are my best moments love them also there's no better healing moment than getting to share a joint with your girly friends like that is the ultimate healing activity that i could ever possibly do tbh remember one time in college

maybe it was 420 maybe it's someone's birthday i don't really know maybe it was a tuesday anyways we bought like eight blunts and rolled them all and then we were gonna drive like 20 minutes away to this beautiful like outlook spot over the city and the entire drive 20 minutes not even a long time the entire 20 minute drive with all the windows up we smoked all eight blunts when I tell you we we reached the top of that like lookout spot and I felt like I was floating in the air I looked around me I was surrounded by all my girly friends I was like wow life is good life is amazing also another one of my favorite weed moments is they're all very simple sometimes they don't have to be crazy but I do miss being like 16 crawling out my window to sit on my roof

and smoke a bowl at like 2am while my parents were asleep and just like being out there alone looking at my backyard in the summer hearing the cicadas hearing the crickets so peaceful and then like crawling back inside to scroll on tumblr and pass out that was also an amazing moment in my life and i wish i didn't take it for granted even though i was in high school and i was miserable there are still joys that you can find i promise someone said so many feelings girl just uh school just started and i feel like my head's already about to combust i'm really just a girl like i feel that i wish somebody would have told me when i was younger like especially high school age your body there's a lot going inside going on inside your body that you do not know about

and those are called hormones and as your body develops and you grow and your brain continues developing and growing those hormones are kind of going crazy trying to figure out where their place is and how they should interact and in turn it makes you a little crazier so if you're young and you're like oh my god i'm having a crazy girl moment like i feel like i'm actually going insane take a deep breath and understand that it's like kind of not your fault and also everybody else is feeling this way because everybody else's body is kind of like imagine like a bunch of puzzle pieces in a box and just getting shook around like and the the puzzle pieces are trying to fucking find their place like but it's just it's just gonna keep shaking until all the puzzle

pieces fit in and that's when you turn 25 and your frontal lobe finishes developing prefrontal cortex whatever the fuck it is anyways yeah it's not your fault bear with it you it does feel like you're going insane a little bit but i wish when i was younger somebody would have told me like hey this is normal you're not losing your mind you don't need to be institutionalized well that one time i did but a majority of the time you don't need to be do your best that's all you can really do right now be kind to yourself and keep moving forward that's all you really need to do someone asked best underwear slash thong brands literally urban outfitters i buy all of my underwear on urban outfitters all of them all of them every single pair of underwear i own is from

urban outfitters they get the cutest ones they always have like a 5 for 25 like 5 for 20 sale whatever it is um and they are adorable they're lacy they got cute prints they got thongs they got boy shorts they got everything and they usually stay like even the lacy ones i feel like lace is a habit of ripping like they stay pretty good for a while honestly um and i love a thong like i'm always in a thong constantly i can't wear like the granny panties because i don't know i just i hate the feeling so yeah the best thongs that i've ever purchased are always from Urban Outfitters not sponsored at all I just straight up it's the only place I shop for underwear someone asked um unsatisfied with life even though everything is objectively great

craving chaos question mark oh girl this this I know a lot about this I do a majority of my life has been just chaos whether chaos I created for myself or outside chaos and it got very comfortable for a sec but that's not how you're supposed to live life you're really not supposed to live life in constant chaos you're supposed to live life peacefully but if you're used to living life in constant chaos you know that peaceful which is healthy and good and how you should be living but that peaceful sort of existence gets a little boring let's be real with ourselves like hayley bieber i know that bitch is bored i know she's so bored with her juice cleanses and her iv drips and whatever like i can only imagine what she gets up to when she finally lets loose a

little bit but i know she's bored but like you know it's healthy you're supposed to be a little bored okay it means you're at peace it means you know there's nothing chaotic and crazy going on constantly in your life that's not how you're supposed to live I thought that's how you're supposed to live it's not you're supposed to be frankly chill and a little bored but I've learned that although that is healthy and good and being in peace and everything being good and chill is important it's also important to let yourself get a little crazy sometimes i used to be a huge party girl like i'm talking every single night out of the house in the club constantly that's not healthy the constantly that's not the healthy part but it is healthy

to allow yourself to go out and get a little crazy every once in a while so me and my boyfriend joke like once a month I have to just like let loose and let the wild side out and cause a little chaos and get a little crazy because if I don't let that part of me out and I don't let her free and I don't kind of uplift that in a sort of sense then I create it somewhere else in my life such as randomly starting a fight with my boyfriend because I'm craving the chaos or you know randomly overthinking a situation because i am craving getting a little out of control or you know causing problems with my day-to-day life as long as i let the rat that lives inside of my brain out like once a month to to go crawl around in the streets and eat trash i'm good and the 30

other days in the month where i am a little bored but i'm satisfied and i'm happy i'm chill and i'm not creating chaos in other parts of my life because I know like to honor that side of me that does want to get a little crazy and get a little frisky and you know get out and get funky so I do encourage you guys as much as it kind of goes against everything that I say to allow yourself to lose control every once in a while to get blackout drunk with your friends to go crawl around the gutters in the street to go bar hopping to go you know to a rave and do i'm joking but like it's equally as healthy as like a face mask in my opinion like those nights where i allow myself to just get so fucking crazy out and go party and go have fun with my boyfriend

or my friends that is just as healthy as me staying in some nights and eating healthy and doing a face mask and taking a bubble bath like they are equally good in my mind so if you feel yourself getting a little bored and you're craving the chaos and you feel like you might create it in your own life and not in a healthy way let it out let her free uncage her girl we are just some girls who deserve to live in the world and get a little crazy every once in a while and i've learned that you can control the crazy if you just when you're feeling it you let it out when you see a good opportunity you let it out now it's not an every single day thing for me personally it's a once a month thing because it usually gets a little too crazy and i need to like recuperate

the rest of the month but it is important to honor every single side of you and that does include the crazy chaotic side just so the rest of the time that you're alive and you're in peace and you're living within unity you don't feel the urge to create chaos because you know that when you do want to allow yourself to let it out you feel free to do so so honor her free the rat in your brain girl have some fun go out get crazy with your friends that's what life's about moving into my first apartment advice tips your apartment is my current inspo illy i just shared a couple photos of my apartment on my instagram stories just of like my favorite aspects number one is like my Barbie dream closet aka my extra bedroom which I just have shoved all of my clothes into

I just need like a getting ready room you know like I feel like I deserve that so that's number one number two is all my plants I have so many of them recently I discovered the beauty of um these vintage animal planters oh I went to the antique mall the other day I got this cute little kitty cat one and this little baby deer one adorable i love like weird eclectic kind of stuff and then my bright yellow banana yellow kitchen my kitchen is painted bright yellow and at first i hated it but now i love it like it's adorable i put a pink backsplash and i feel like it just works perfectly together but here's the thing before moving in don't buy anything and I know that's kind of the opposite of what you want to hear but before you move in all you need

is cleaning supplies like a vacuum maybe but and like pots and pans and dishes that's it buy everything after you move in because I feel like everything that I had planned for this apartment completely flipped upside down because I got in here and I actually started feeling like the vibe of the place and where I wanted to put stuff by standing here instead of imagining it and it was a complete 360 of what I had imagined and like my big like google doc shopping list of everything that I want and how I want to decorate I like deleted it all and started over so save yourself some money and some frustration and some time and just move in with what you have it's gonna feel a little bare at first but it's really fun kind of starting from the beginning and

decorating the space based off of how you live in it and I feel like that's so important but cleaning supplies important you're gonna need to deep clean your apartment before you get in cooking supplies pots pans dishes you can eat groceries of course a vacuum that's really all you need toilet paper shampoo towels but then move in and then see what you want that is my number one tip for apartment living and try and thrift as much as you can i go to the thrift store like once a week i don't buy shit if i don't think it's gonna work okay but i have found a lot of my decorations and stuff like that at my at the thrift store love the thrift store someone asked tips for putting yourself first while you just want to help others I love you so much I ask let

me ask another question is it really helping other people or doing something good if it is hurting you in the process does that make sense like I feel like we get into this people pleaser mindset of what have to say yes to this and I have to do what this person wants and I have to behave this way and I have to I have to I have to but in the process you're hurting yourself and in the process you're neglecting yourself and you're not being true or real with who you are so are you actually being a people pleaser and doing something good in your mind if you are you know neglecting yourself in the process no no it's a fine balance and if you are a people pleaser and you have a habit of running away from yourself and neglecting yourself in that sort of

way I challenge you to say no I challenge you to say no a lot and I challenge you to say yes to yourself but there is a fine balance of like people pleasing is okay to an extent everything is okay to an extent it's okay to want to make your mom happy or want to make your partner happy or to be good to your friends those are very normal natural things it's just when it goes against you you have to learn to say no because if you are not standing up for yourself sticking up for yourself being honest with yourself being real with the people around you with what you really want it's not fair to them and it's not fair to you because they don't know what's going on inside your head they don't know that by asking you to do this it's hurting you in some sort of

way um and if you don't speak up for yourself they're not going to know that and then it's going to really kind of warp the dynamic of that relationship honesty can be scary saying no can be scary but it is the mature thing to do and it strengthens a relationship like no other if your friend can't be can't be told no that's their problem you got to stand up for yourself you got to stand up for what you need in this moment and if they're a good friend or a good person they will hear that they will see that they will respect that and if they can't that's a problem that they need to deal with on their own you did what you need to do for yourself but sometimes you got to say no sometimes girly it's not fair to you it really isn't just because you're being

good to someone else doesn't mean you're being good to you it's a fine line it's a fine balance love you he wouldn't change until i broke up with him now he wants to try again what do i do love you okay so let me tell you a little story crisscross applesauce let's sit down for story time girlies my parents they met they've been together for girl 25 30 years i don't even know at this point anyways they met in college okay 20 years old no no 18 years old very young they met at the square dance event for incoming freshmen in college okay they met they dated throughout college they grew together but my dad started kind of falling behind a little bit and my mom she was graduating she's becoming a teacher she was moving forward with her life she felt like

my dad couldn't keep up and she had this talk with him she didn't see any movement she broke up with him she did she broke up with him she said you gotta get your shit together i can't be with you broke up with him moved on with her life for like i don't know probably a year guess what he did within that time. He said, Oh, shit, I lost a real baddie. I need to get my shit together. I need to get her back. But the important key factor here is she cut ties, she moved forward with her life, she kept focusing on herself, she kept focusing on her growth he focused on his growth to catch up to you know fix himself in whatever way he needed

to do so and then he proved it to her if you don't see any proof in the pudding honey if he's not chasing after you and showing you that he's changed and showing you that he can be better and like actually real life proof like not just saying these things like no like my dad actually graduated from college like he got his shit together he got a job he did all these things he had a new job lined up like he was ready to take on life with her if you don't see that and i'm talking like boom box outside your window kind of situation if he's just sliding in your dms girl fuck that man okay he needs to show some real fucking change he needs to show that he wants you and misses you and is really ready to prove himself to you and you know really make

this relationship real and strong and if he is not going above and fucking beyond and then continues it then it ain't worth it girl it ain't worth it i'm saying he's gotta be doing it all backflips front flips putting on a whole circus a whole show if he's just sliding your dms that's weak that's real weak but i do think after hearing that from my mom and dad and seeing that like a man who is really in love with a woman can change and can you know do better for love but you have to prove yourself like if he didn't prove himself my mom would have been like okay now what like you didn't do anything different you didn't change you didn't grow we aren't at the same level it's not worth it so ask yourself is it worth it and if you don't

see any proof girl run run hmm my boyfriend hates when i smoke weed but he was like the biggest stoner in high school he still smokes but right now he's on a break because of college but like it's such an ick when he gives me shit for it weird controlling those are my top two thoughts number two i'm kind of thinking like if he's on a break and you smoke around him like if you're openly smoking a bowl next to his face like yeah that could be annoying and i can see why he would give you shit for it but if you're like out with friends away from him you know out of the house like not doing it next to him yada yada yada and he's still being weird and giving you shit for it that's a weird controlling behavior and I would say just ignore or tell him like low-key shut the

fuck up like don't say that wow that was aggressive just be like dude it's my life you don't have control over me I'm gonna do what I want stop giving me shit for decisions that you would also make because it's really condescending period sometimes you have to have that conversation with a partner but also like if you're doing it right next to his face maybe distance distance okay if he's on a break right now it's annoying as a person who has been on many tea breaks it is annoying to be around people who smoke but like if you're not openly smoking next to him then he needs to chill he needs to smoke some weed dude no i'm kidding um but yeah weird controlling behavior something to think about the guy who ghosted me is ig stalking me i unfollowed him

a while ago thoughts that's why you block them and then when it says block them and any other account they create that's the button you press and then you live in peace period okay i don't know if you're a girl who bloats like i am i don't know maybe it's because i eat chipotle once a week and pizza and my diet has been a little crazy recently but like that's what life's about i want to eat good food i want to enjoy like but maybe eating tacos three times a week is not healthy for me anyways I have been bloating like crazy like crazy like I wake up I'm in pain from being bloated all day in pain from being bloated but here's the thing I'm not one of those gluten-free girls like I need my gluten I love my gluten I understand it's gonna make me bloat a little bit

but I know that's not like a majority issue problem it's because I'm just like probably not eating the healthiest so i was like how do i fix this you know how do i go about this what do i try and i talked to my grandma who's kind of a health freak and she was like why don't you just drink some kombucha i was like what she's like yeah just drink some kombucha you know like drink a little bit in the morning on an empty stomach like you don't need to drink a whole bottle but just like get some synergy kombucha drink a little bit in the morning the living the living beings in the kombucha will help kind of work in tandem with your gut and help move the food and the gas and stuff along in a healthy manner and i was like okay i can get i can get on board with that

she's like either kombucha or like ginger lemon tea so i bought both um and i am happy to report three days in drinking like four ounces of kombucha in the morning which listen if you can drink a beer or you can drink a white claw you can drink kombucha it's the same fucking thing it tastes exactly the same but drink a little bit in the morning on an empty stomach oh my god my bloating's gone it's gone it's completely gone I'm like actually shocked and I'm still eating unhealthy I know I need to fix that a little bit but I've been having too much fun with food and i'm gonna allow myself to do that because life is good and it should be enjoyed um but yeah kombucha in the morning if you're a girl who bloats that shit has done wonders for me and

it's the lemon what is it called lemon berry i think it's called lemon berry that's my favorite one and you can use a bottle and the bottle lasts you all week it stays good that long but i just take like four little chugs out of it i don't even drink a whole bottle you don't need that much just four chugs fixed everything also it's really bad for the enamel of your teeth so drink it with a straw or brush your teeth directly afterwards pro tip but shout out kombucha try to have casual sex caught feelings now i don't know what to do or how to act help very normal very normal there's nothing wrong with you for catching feelings let me say that okay when it comes to sex it is a bonding experience you are being completely

open and vulnerable as vulnerable as you possibly can be without words okay you're sharing an experience with somebody it is normal to feel something afterwards i don't know who got in their mind that you shouldn't feel anything after sex that's completely wrong and you are insane feeling something after sex is normal you are normal that's okay ask yourself where do you want to go with this like genuinely you got casual sex it was great you do feel something that's amazing of course you're going to feel something after getting raw and vulnerable with somebody very normal but sit down honestly with yourself and taking the sex aspect out of the situation okay physically like reach into your brain grab that experience throw it out the window

just for a moment we can come back to that later but imagine the partner or the man that you experience this with standing in front of you. Think about every experience you've had with them, who they are as a person, what you know about them. Ask yourself, do I want to get to know them more? And if I already know them pretty well enough, do I even relatively think they would make a good partner if the answer is no then you can ask yourself can i as a person have casual sex with somebody and not have it turn into a relationship and not get hurt the answer is also note to that. Maybe you need to cut that man off. Maybe we need to avoid the casual sex aspect and focus more on the dating aspect. Now, if you do think this person can be a good partner

and the sex is great and you do want to get to know more about them, I would say bring that up in conversation. Very normal also to have conversations with the people you are sleeping with about what the fuck they're looking for I don't know when it became a like a stigma to fucking talk to people about what they're looking for in a partner or what they're thinking about doing with their life right now like very normal things to talk about but say hey don't even have to make it about you just be like hey what are you looking for right now maybe it's just casual sex maybe they just want to hook up no strings attached maybe they are looking for something more and they're just weighing their options whatever it may be have that conversation with

them and whatever answer they give you take it at face value if they say yeah i'm not looking for a relationship right now heard they're not looking for a relationship if you are cut that man off immediately and move forward know your fucking worth okay they don't want a relationship with you they just told that to your face if you if that's going to hurt you and continue being around them is going to hurt you remove that man from your life move forward to a man who is going to want to be around you and specifically long term maybe they are weighing their options they're trying to figure it out just like you are amazing maybe you guys can set some boundaries keep working forward keep having great sex whatever it may be slowly work through that relationship

it's normal to not jump into things early and want to weigh your options and want to make sure that this is a good partner for you but have that conversation with that person and if they can't be mature give you a reasonable answer about what they want with their life then that is a mess that they're creating for themselves that you do not want to be involved with okay but i am here to tell all my girlies out there it is very normal to have feelings after having sex with somebody normal that doesn't mean they're gonna make a good partner you have to remove the sexual experience from your brain look at them as if they are a ken in a box in front of you and ask yourself would i buy this ken off the shelf would i would i spend my money to purchase this ken

off the shelf i know that's not what dating is like but theoretically like would i put effort into this person to make them a person to have around me constantly if the answer is no let's let's 360 babe and and reverse and move a different direction all right but these are conversations and things you should be thinking about i noticed when i was having casual sex and avoiding these things and not having these conversations you know feelings heightened things got messier I got crazier because I was avoiding my emotions and I wasn't listening to what they had to say and if they said they didn't want a relationship I was trying to convince myself that maybe they did take everything at face value okay if they say they don't want

anything they don't want anything ask yourself am I gonna be here waiting around or am I gonna move forward with somebody who does want something but talk talk to your partners oh my god most important conversation you need to have with your casual sexual partners have you been tested the biggest one if they get freaked out by that they are not matured enough to be sticking anything inside you period anyways love you have fun casual sex can be good if you are honest about your emotions and you don't try and force people into a box that they don't want to be forced into everybody will usually tell you what they want and who they are but you got to take it at face value if that man says he doesn't want a relationship right now he does not want a

relationship right now someone asked tips on going to a festival alone this is a good question because i go to a lot of them alone and a lot of concerts alone and i've gotten more comfortable doing that the older i've gotten and the more i've gotten into the concert community or whatever just the more experience i've had because i know what's going to happen a i think if you're going to go to a concert alone you should stay sober um i think you should be very aware of your surroundings you should be aware of what's going on um constantly and i do think if you're going to something alone you should stay sober that is just the safest option for you number two you need to have a plan of how you're going to get there and how you're going to get home whether it's a

uber whether it's your car whether it's your friend coming and picking you up maybe the bus whatever it is never go someplace and not have a way of getting home like ever girl tip number one never do that so make sure you have a plan of how you're getting there how you're getting home stay sober stay aware of your surroundings share your location with a friend let at least somebody know what's going on even if it's just your parents like hey i'm going to this concert so somebody knows where you are you're not just like randomly going somewhere without anybody knowing um and then when it comes to being alone and being a little anxious i go to a lot of like festivals and edm shows which means like people are a little bit more inviting and a little bit

more talkative so i like to bring a lot of candy like the bracelets to hand out because that's a great way to spark up conversation you can bring like little toys or little figurines or like little rubber duckies with you to hand out make friends with so if you see like a cute girl you can be like girl i want to give this to you illy and then like boom you probably made a new bestie you know stuff like that that is a great way to make friends when you're alone be open also concert safety 101 i feel like recently and not even recently this has always been like a goal for major concert goers is like we have to be barricade like we have to be completely up front and like that could be fun if it's a small concert if it's a big fucking festival like

like a Coachella or Lollapalooza that shit can be scary that shit could be not fun and I think honestly the most fun places are the places where you have a little bit of space to yourself and you can see because if you're up front like even just like not even barricade but kind of up front like you're trying to make it there and you're in the middle you're probably not going to see shit i was that way for kelly uchis i was on the floor but it was a long floor so i was a little further back and like my ass couldn't see over anybody's head and i was in the middle of this giant pit and people were like pushing each other and squeezing in so tight and I was like oh not fun I might as well just like go stand further away but in a better area that I can see

so barricade is not always the most important thing for festivals I know it's fun you have a big group of people it can be really great but sometimes the best place to stand is further back where you can actually see the person performing and have a little bit more breathing room to yourself because these concert nowadays people are getting crazy aggressive for no reason so stay safe have fun and the most fun thing about being about going to festivals is dressing up so wear something cute you know knowing what you have to do but overthinking the logistics of it all procrastination i love procrastination sometimes people think procrastination is like you just not thinking of it and then oh my god all of a sudden i have to do it but procrastination can look like

you um it's just avoidance avoidance in any sort of form whether you're overthinking it or underthinking it either way same thing procrastination let me just tell you this you magically thinking through every single possible step will not make it easier until you get up and actively try to work through whatever problem whatever thing you got to do whatever big task you're trying to achieve that's when you will be able to actually visualize and know what next steps you have to do you will never be able to sit down write down every single possible step that you need to do to get this thing done and then get up and then go do them because guess what those steps that you wrote down before shit's gonna switch up reality's gonna set in

you're going to be like, oh, wait a minute, I actually need to do this. So stop thinking, start doing, period. You can never think your way through a situation. You can never think your way into growing. It's a combination of thinking and acting, but you have to have the two. If you are not simply taking one step forward at a time, you will not get to where you need to go you don't need to know all the steps you need to know what goal you have and what the first step is you will figure out the other steps as they come all you need to do is do the first thing maybe the first thing is getting up maybe you just need to get up my god step one get up step two sit down at your desk okay then move forward from there do you know

what I mean but you will never be able to magically think your situation into a better situation or think your way into having something done you have to act and you will never be able to know every single step that you need done until you start doing it love you you gotta get on your zoom love you okay boyfriend and i recently did back door stuff and it was great but do you have any tips slash tricks i do i have many many uh tips slash tricks first of all oh a oil up you need some you need lots lots of lube lots of oil i personally prefer like a baby oil love that amazing also it makes your body so soft afterwards but i love a baby oil number one you're gonna need a lot of that period number two before you get into putting a full eight inches

inside of you let's work with a finger let's work with a couple fingers maybe you know it's okay to stretch feel it out get into that so you're a little more ready to go before putting you know a whole dick inside you let's be real like let's work our way up girl now if you've already done a little bit of finger stuff i recommend men maybe getting a toy like i love a butt plug that's always fun um especially to where like maybe you have the butt plug in while you're having sex pre backdoor stuff um to like stretch you out a little bit i have a vibrating butt plug that shit is amazing love it will be really great for you and your partner um because he'll be able to feel that inside of you um but use that first fingers toys whatever lots of lube lots of oil

whatever it may be and then you can move forward to the actual ding-a-ling let's you know my favorite position is me flat on my stomach it's kim k position flat my stomach legs together legs out like literally just like laying on my stomach with my arms under my head like comfortable like as if I was sleeping peacefully on my stomach it's like Kim K love it so I am not doing any work period I don't want to have to do any work to be honest because most of the work that I'm going to be doing is fitting all that inside me so let him put in the work I'm not saying sit on him I'm not saying doggy style no the more you are not contracting those muscles in your abdomen the better so i think personally just laying on my stomach perfect now slow is better okay

slowly slow and he should be able to control himself but and you can kind of control him too you can like put your hands back and move his hips how you want it to go and be in control a little bit you don't have to be completely out of control in these situations i do like to be a little bit more in control um but slow is better just to get acquainted and to you know get used to it and then you can have you know full-blown sex now when i am doing anal i also do like to include a vibrator of some sorts um for just like clit stimulation because then it's like all the stimulation like there's a lot happening and that is super fun but it's a really fun thing to discover together slow slow and steady wins the race lots of oil work your way up take it slow

once again and have fun someone said cutting off a close friend love them but the vibes just haven't been there recently advice now i don't mean to be mean but this is very that's really harsh that's really harsh i couldn't imagine being someone's friend and like yeah maybe i'm going through my own things or like we aren't as close as we used to be anymore and then them like sending me a text being like we are not friends anymore i'm cutting you off don't speak to me these are my boundaries like oh my god i would lose my mind you guys need to understand that you don't have to cut every single person in your life off as soon as you feel like something's going wrong that actually is an issue with you and that means you're running away from things and that

means you have an issue with allowing nuance into your life okay it's okay to be out of control it's okay to let other people live their lives it's okay to you know have your friends go through things or not talk for a little bit of time but just because somebody isn't behaving a certain way of how you want them to doesn't mean you need to be like they're toxic i'm cutting them off completely i don't know your full situation but i have been getting a lot of questions like that lately it's okay to grow apart naturally and maybe you guys just don't speak as much anymore maybe you guys don't text as much anymore that's okay but you don't need to cut everybody in your life off as soon as one little small thing goes wrong that's you running away from things in your

life that's you not taking accountability for your life that's you not allowing people fully into your life okay and i feel like with all the therapy talk going around people started using it in a negative way we kind of saw that with the jonah hill thing being like these are my boundaries but all of them were just about other people and how he wants to police other people and their bodies that's not fucking healthy that's not the way you're supposed to use this shit boundaries are things that you do with your body and your life okay and if he knew that this girl was doing these things before he even met her that should have been his prerogative to be like maybe i don't want to be with them he can't get into a relationship and then change them the same way

like the whole toxic mindset oh well they're not behaving this one specific way that i want them to and that's a toxic and i need to cut them off because they're a toxic person for me no people make mistakes the strongest friendships are the one that maybe ebb and flow and you find each other again or you know maybe someone makes a mistake and you work through it and you grow through it and you allow forgiveness into your life there's nuance to everything but you guys don't need to go around cutting off people here and there because guess what at the end of the day if that's how you behave you don't forgive people you don't allow people to make mistakes and be human you don't allow people to do their own thing in life you're going to be surrounded by nobody at

the end of your life if you're going around cutting people off the smallest thing no one's going to be there at the end of the day you have to allow people to grow and be who they are the same way you would want people to allow you to grow and be who you are don't you want forgiveness in your life don't you want you know people to give you space when you need it don't you want people to you know be there for you when you know you're a little distance yes of course show up with love approach with love allow people to be their own person allow them to be a little human but you guys don't need to be running around willy-nilly cutting people off for the smallest of things that behavior is when you have allowed forgiveness and allowed them to be human and they

continuously show you that they are not growing they are not you know being the person that they say they are they keep hurting you they keep doing the same behavior that's when you set boundaries and you're like i need to remove myself from the situation i don't think being around you is healthy for me for me right now but if the vibes are just off girl maybe you just need some space and that's okay someone asked how to stay focused while studying i feel like i always get distracted great question a go to the library go to the library it's gonna be silent it's gonna be so quiet because guess what everybody else in there is also studying coffee shops not great for studying amazing for getting homework done pro tip go to a library number two turn your

fucking phone off okay put it on airplane mode turn it off don't don't pick up your phone don't touch your phone turn it off if you're on a laptop turn your notifications off on your laptop now allow yourself study breaks my brain can only focus for a certain amount of time so I do 10 minutes at a time then I'll do 15 then I'll do 20 and I'll slowly work my way up so I'll do like 10 minutes studying five minutes on my phone set a timer for that five minutes that you get on your phone when the timer goes off turn the timer off turn it back on airplane mode get back to studying set another 10 minute timer do 10 minutes of studying on and on and on and on you have to allow yourself breaks and you have to allow yourself frequent breaks for me personally

I'm not the kind of person who's like I'm gonna study for four hours then I'm gonna get an hour break no I have to do like 10 minutes five minutes or 15 minutes five minutes 20 minutes five minutes allow yourself breaks also pro tip for studying if you have friends in the same class as you study with them I'm not saying like get together and like chit chat about it when you get together to study if you can't teach your friends about what you're trying to study for then you don't know it so use that as practice use your friends as practice hey can i explain this to you as a way of being able to figure it out myself use it as like a teacher kind of student rule if you can't fully explain it to your friend then you don't know anything about it all right

but studying with friends can be amazing as long as you guys are actually doing the work very important um i'm the kind of person who has to study alone if we are not doing the same kind of studying like when i was in nursing school i could study with people if we were studying the same thing but i could not study with people if we were not studying the same thing because when other people have different study habits it has a way of breaking mine if someone was to get up and like I'm gonna go get a coffee real quick I'd be like oh yeah I'll go get a coffee with you but it's like no I really need to stay here and study so studying alone study in the library set timers set breaks for yourself and study with people if it's the same class or the same topic and if you

can't teach them what you are studying then you don't know it also Quizlet love Quizlet love flashcards flashcards are your best friend someone said I love my boyfriend but I don't think he's the man i meant to marry have fun till it's not fun and then go your separate ways that's the best way to date it's okay to recognize you can have a lot of fun with a person you don't have to set like if you're 18 19 20 21 22 whatever like you're not even fucking close to marriage it's okay to date around and have fun with people for a little bit but as soon as it doesn't become fun and you're like you know i don't think this person's for me listen to that do the hard thing break up move on okay this is like the perfect last question to end on someone asked what's my

ideal cartoon rotation like blunt rotation specifically cartoon wise i'm gonna say hello kitty um swan lake barbie baby son from the teletubbies shaggy and scooby of course the older sister from lilo and stitch and honestly like just you could just give me a blunt and drop me off in the world of adventure time and i would be living my best life anyways that's all i can really think of right now me like cartoons oh and spongebob not patrick just spongebob maybe even squidward like i get it i do i understand i get you anyways i love you guys so much i hope you have a fantastic rest of your day remember to do those manifestations happy lionsgate portal you are so worthy you are so

deserving you are beautiful you are loved you are supported you are gonna get everything that you possibly deserve and want within this lifetime i love you all so much thank you for being here thank you for being you thank you for supporting not only yourself but me along the way and i cannot wait to see you next week