Smoke Sesh - divine timing, tarot, psychedelics & real ass bitch

Episode Date: March 18, 2025

hello everyone and welcome back! so excited to be here with you all this week with an energetic spring episode, we jump right in and talk all the details of the canna style drop! coming this Thursday on the spring equinox, 12PM EST! we also do a weekend recap of what I've been up to, and talk march energy and utilizing it for good, divine timing and trusting the process, psychedelics, natural anxiety remedies for a t break, am I a bad person? releasing guilt and growing, big sister energy, its not you its them, spirituality and tarot tips, spending intentional time with yourself, staying comfy while dressing cozy, self worth, how to find a real man, being a real ass bitch, I hate my job, surviving burn out, too bitchy and how to cut the attitude, nudes? and much much much more! please if you want to support come get your fairy canna style x Hannah collab, available on the canna style website beginning Thursday March 20th at 12PM EST, love you! MUAH!

listen everybody needs a fairy godmother you know just somebody to look out for them some people call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sesh so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all hello and welcome back to the internet's favorite smoke sesh my name is hannah your host and i am so excited to be back with you all today it is a bright and beautiful sunshiny morning it is hectic where i am because i am filming this on saint patty's day and the big city celebration that we have for st patty's day with the parades and the jello shots and the beads and

the chaos and the helicopters happens literally two blocks away from me will not be participating today i did not think i mentally had it in me and listen when you have that feeling you gotta you gotta listen to it girl all right i'm like i got things to do i am on business mode i wish i had the energy in me to go day drink but unfortunately i think i left that with 22 year old hannah 25 year old hannah is like girl our brain cells our organ health i don't think we can take it anymore so i'm just going to sit and enjoy and do some art and hopefully you know harness this newfound spring energy into something good you can tell the weather's getting nicer when I finally start popping out in cute outfits like okay hello titties hey girls the girls are out

and ready to play all winter I'm like sweats sweats maybe a matching sweatsuit if I'm feeling like actually like I want to put effort into something but generally sweats like when I'm cold the only thing I can really think about is not being cold now in the summer and the spring the inner whore in me jumps out and literally I just want to wear the smallest outfit tightest outfit most see-through outfit possible there's something in my soul that really calls to it but that being said I hope you had a fantastic week thank you for all the kind and sweet words about the drop my canna style drop you guys I was like showing my dad who is the resident stoner in my household this collaboration and I went back to look at the whole email thread with the processes

and just like our journey together with canistyle and we started working on this May 6th it's been almost a year of us working together and trying to come up with something beautiful and I'm so glad that it came to fruition in this sort of sense and we were able to create something genuinely so amazing and so just gorgeous that all of you are going to be able to have and to hold and this week I know last week I was like Friday Friday Friday but the spring equinox is on Thursday and I felt just in my heart it made way more sense for us to drop it on the spring equinox i feel like it really brings in good vibes and good energy for the drop it just makes more sense um so if you would like to get these fairy bongs early they will be dropping thursday

march 20th at 12 p.m est now i'm sure there's there will still be some available by friday so don't worry if you are planning on purchasing on that Friday but I would like to make it clear this is a limited edition limited time drop all the art and the merch or whatever you want to call it that I've created for you guys has always been a limited drop as an artist I just I really enjoy putting out one big body of work and then moving on to the next one and this drop is also kind of acting in that sort of way there will not be a restock there will not be a second drop this is the time if you are interested if you would like to have this beautiful fairy bong in the iridescent green or the iridescent pink i mean come on you guys look at how gorgeous she is

she's been sitting in my house for like months now and i was like i can't smoke out of her i can't smoke out of her i gotta save her and finally like last week i smoked out of her for the first time and it was oh magical but if you are interested in these beautiful fairy pieces thursday 12 p.m est they will be available for you all oh my god i'm so excited literally like i've been working so long on this and honestly this project has really taught me how hard work and time really does eventually pay off and sometimes like the more time and the more work you put into something the better it is that quick project like sure sometimes it can be good but those things that you really put your heart and soul and desire and inspiration into those are

the things that really come out the most beautiful so i genuinely appreciate all of your guys's support and yes come smoke out of me come smoke out of this smoke sash fairy are you kidding me literally she's gorgeous anytime i have friends come into my house like i have so much shit around me as you can tell like look behind me your girl is a maximalist but every time people come into my house they always spot it and they're like oh my god like what is that like is that can you smoke out of it it's like art it's a piece it is uh amazing so cheers to the spring equinox cheers to that drop thursday 12 p.m est get your hands on it let's smoke together girls come get your girl bong okay and we will smoke out of her in a second i have a little bit more catching up with

you guys to do but that's probably the biggest thing happening in my life um around this time the one thing that i'm looking forward to the most this week but this weekend was really good as well i had family in town so i was able to spend time with them and hang out with them which is you know it's always a gamble it's always like is this gonna be really fun or is this gonna be like wow i am literally visualizing all of my traumas in front of me this is not fun but it was good it was a great time um i had to work friday night which i haven't worked in a while just because of life stuff and chaos stuff i work for a very like anti-capitalist we are different kind of company those companies biggest red flag they say that and then you have to miss work for

like a family like life or death situation and they're like um actually you need to be here um actually company comes first bitch shut the fuck up suck my fucking dick fake ass bitch anyways that was crazy of me but i've been missing work a little bit recently so i finally worked on friday and it was probably 6 45 you know i'm running around it's starting to get crazy busy at the restaurant and all of a sudden poof the lights go off and i was like lol who hit the light switch what's going on like so funny and then I looked around and I was like oh no like all the lights are off well it was crazy windy there was a huge storm on Friday and a giant tree fell on the back and knocked down all of our power lines so your girl gotta go home early it was crazy everybody

just looked around it was like what the fuck and it's like dinner's on us I guess which honestly worked out the best because people just started throwing cash at us and listen I would rather go home early with the same amount of cash that I would if I stayed the whole entire time that is a win in my book so that was great got to spend more time with family just immediately grabbed a bottle of wine and went over to my mom's house and yeah gotta see my niece and my nephew every time I see them I always like to do a little bit of art with them I mean what kid doesn't like fucking doing art and art is such like such a passion of mine that it's like I want to share my passions with my niece and my nephew always like I feel like when I was into art as a child

it was like oh you know all kids like doing art but it wasn't really something that was taken seriously within me my parents were always like oh yeah art cute you're good at it but it was never like you can be an artist if that's what you want to do you can be an artist I was never pushed in that direction even to this day my parents are like okay well how much money are you gonna make girl please it's not all about money please my soul needs to live and thrive as well so if I can kind of provide that for my niece and my nephew I really really try to do that and I got like cute little ceramic animals for them to paint we did some painting together very adorable very fun and thank you so much for the sweet kind words for danger his surgery did go well very well

sedation was a little spooky scary I feel so bad I feel so bad every time I go into that vet I just immediately break down sobbing because it's like I don't know what's going on and you don't know what's going on and that's stressing me out more I wish it was like oh yeah this happens often here are these steps to make this not happen anymore it's like that's not what it is it's just well shit well I guess we'll try this so really really really fucking hope that this is the end of this journey and we can keep him happy and healthy from here on out he's a checkup on Thursday but he seems to be doing really well and seems to be just generally feeling better after the procedure so thank you thank you for keeping him in your thoughts and prayers it

really does it means the world to me I get on here and I share the good things with you guys I get on here and I share the bad things with you guys it's life you know I'm glad that we can at least go through it together and having you guys to hang out and speak with really does take a lot of that anxiety out of like my system um it's nice to just have a community that sees and hears you no matter what so thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you but with that being said that's really all I have to catch you guys up on today I've slowly been working on my tattoo portfolio there's something about the energy of March um that is just so energetic and sparking I don't know how else to describe it so last March I also felt this energy and when you feel this

energy this like rising bubbling boiling heat inside you and passion to kind of do something you have to do something with that energy you have to or else if you keep it inside it will go stagnant it will disappear and you'll be like damn why the fuck did I not do anything so last year literally on this day I remember going to the St. Paddy's Day parade with my boyfriend and I was just like I was at my other restaurant at the time and I was like I can't do it anymore I can't do it anymore this is just not the place for me I don't feel like I feel like it's holding me back I feel like I just need to switch the energy up so I can enter like a new era of my life like I just need to do something about it so I took four fucking jello shots chugged a couple

pbrs had a reuben came home at like 3 p.m after the parade immediately got on my laptop looked up all the different restaurants hiring even restaurants that weren't hiring talked to my mom and dad and were like hey what restaurants do you like going to because they're big foodies and like where do you think i would fit in what places you know think i would make some fucking money at and i sent probably 25 emails that day i got a response the next day from the restaurant that i'm currently at being like all right great let's set up an interview bam by the end of the week i had a new job yeah so right now i'm also feeling that energy except for instead of trying to find a new restaurant job i need to free myself from these shackles of working in the restaurant

industry i see all of these people around me and listen i'm a big proponent for working in the restaurant industry if you are young you know what fuck it any age if you need cash now don't go take out that payday loan girl go get a waitressing job go get a server gig i guarantee the money it's just so nice you know you're able to go and work and actually get some payoff from it you know if you can make eye contact and hold semi a conversation you will make good money period so great fantastic love it at this point in my life i just i can't do it anymore please for the love of god i have to do something new i see all of these older people that i work with 30 40 50 who sit at this restaurant job and they're miserable they're miserable where they are

oh my god i can't believe i never did anything with my life oh my god like i can't believe i have to work in this fucking restaurant blah blah blah and it's like wow that looks miserable the fact that you sit here and complain and do nothing about it that looks fucking miserable i cannot be like you i can't be like you please for the love of god i'm seeing i'm seeing a alternate reality and i do not like it i do not like the signs i do not like what's in front of me and i need to free myself so i've been doing the artist way artist way has been going very good if you want to keep up with it i will hopefully be uploading my weekly first week ah recap um one week in and i'm feeling wow enthralled enthusiastic i'm feeling really really good um honestly i feel like i've grown

exponentially as an artist simply through doing my morning pages um and i find myself reaching to do art more often so i am almost done with my tattoo portfolio and then i have to be a brave brave girl and use this march energy to go out and pitch myself and i don't mind pitching myself I don't mind getting turned down if it means possibly being one step closer to the future that I want oh you're gonna say no bitch I don't give a fuck I'm gonna go ask like a thousand people and I guarantee you one of those people are gonna say yes period there's something so I don't know nice about knowing that anything I want I can have it is just how bad do I want it and am I gonna go out and get it knowing that really establishes such a sense of peace inside

of me and yeah cheers to new beginnings if you're feeling that spring equinox you know enthusiasm and drive do something with that energy it will push you into new heights into new beginnings into new stories a new life that you never could have imagined that will be bring so much peace and positivity to you so that's how my march is going so far so far so good feeling good feeling excited feeling renewed feeling hopeful and i hope you all are too with that being said let's smoke oh i just can't get over how cute she is and i just got the photos for the pink one oh she's so cute i will be ordering both so they can live together i feel like i just need to have both duh once again if you are interested these pieces will be available

Thursday 12 p.m EST I know I said last week they will be available Friday I'm sure there will be so don't worry but get your hands on them and they will be shipped Canada style is amazing their customer service amazing the way that they package and ship things amazing you never have to worry about a piece breaking they have like a protection I think it's like under a dollar but it's like a protection fee that it's like if you pay 98 cents and your piece breaks in the mail we'll send you a new one no questions asked which I think is so incredible because so many of these like companies are like um $15 perfection protection fee girl shut up 98 cent protection fee that's where it is but she is so gorgeous so cute and they will be shipped in time if you

order them um by the end of this week they will be shipped and should arrive earlier than you probably expect but at least by 4 20 so we will literally be able to smoke together are you fucking kidding anyways let's hit this cheers girlies oh my god my gorgeous gorgeous girl also my boyfriend put a like dab rig piece into it instead of a bowl piece and it also did really well so if you want to use it to smoke as like a rig you can definitely do so i did make it with the intention of being more so a bong but it's good to know that it is usable in many different ways in many different forms however you're feeling but enough of my yapping let's get into what's on your guys's minds oh this is interesting

do you believe in divine timing i do but i think my understanding of it has kind of the older i get the more i just generally have a better understanding of life um and i think how i view it now is completely different than maybe how i viewed it at 19 i mean my divine timing understanding at 19 was very surface level like oh my god angel numbers oh my god like i'm seeing signs and visions and sure yes but like of course there's a deeper meaning to divine timing and I think right now divine timing to me is more of this peaceful understanding of like it is going to be okay you are exactly where you are supposed to be it will all work out how you wanted to eventually but you truly need to live in the moment and take it one step at a time

don't stress yourself out with those future goals and needs by trying to get them in the now when where you are in the now is exactly where you need to be a lot of that has come through kind of my career hunting recently my frontal lobe developed and I had had a lot of fun a lot of fun in my early 20s but I realized like the fun that I was having was not sustainable of course the life that I was living was not sustainable unless I wanted to be like a mollied out rave girl with three kids like that shit is just not gonna happen that's not the life that i want to live is it a life i could have fallen into yes definitely but thank god we developed a little bit more up here and it's like no we need peace stability quiet like that's what i'm searching for um and in that

moment i feel like there was two options there i think a lot of people in their mid-20s do have a mental breakdown moment where it's like what the fuck am i doing but truly knowing that like divine timing well I am where I am I'm appreciative for where I've gone and I'm appreciative for where I am about to go kept me from having that mid-20s mental breakdown kept me from spiraling and being like well I'm doing it all wrong I'm being so I'm being so bad I'm not doing what I want to do all these other people blah blah blah bullshit you know what I mean it truly was well well I am where I am and yeah you know what I'm thankful for the realization of knowing maybe this isn't where I want to be or I do what I would like to grow more in the future um and I don't know where I'm

going to go that's what really causes that mental like breakdown in most people to hit fully where it's like well I don't like what I'm doing but also what the fuck am I gonna do like what the fuck am I gonna do girl how the hell are we gonna pull this off I don't know I've been through so many hardships at such a young age that it was like a lesson that was being hit over my head over and over again that it was like you will figure it all out shit might be fucking crazy right now you might not know what direction you need to go or how you're going to go or where the fuck you're going to go but with time and with drive to understand you will figure it all out it might not be on the timeline that you exactly thought of it might not be on the timeline of how

fast you fucking want things but it will get there eventually there's been so many like dreams and hopes that I've had that it's like okay maybe I have those ideas and I do work towards them and then it kind of fizzles out and then all of a sudden it's like boom randomly 10 years in the future I'm like holy shit I I did achieve that thing though you know I kept my hope for it and I kept dreaming about it and I kept working towards something I didn't know what but something and that shit did come true divine timing it does play out eventually but it's so you can't put like a certain time frame or idea or need behind it it truly just has to be a trust in yourself and a trust that the universe will put you on the path that is best for you it will it does ultimately

have your best interests in favor and especially in those moments where you're like damn I feel like shit's just really hard right now like what the fuck I definitely am not God's favorite child like why am I going through so many hard things or why do I feel so lost or maybe why do I feel so disconnected especially in those times there's so much to take out of it and so many lessons to learn that eventually when you come out of it you do realize like holy shit okay no I trusted in myself the universe trusted in me it did play out safely I just had to stand by myself and want more for myself want better for myself if there's one thing that divine timing has taught me it's that it will all work out and it will work out 10 times better than you ever could have imagined and as I

go through this new transition of like new interests new hobbies personal transition financial transition job transition whatever it is I have these goals and I do have this vision of where I want to go finally um it took me a while to get there it took me a couple years to get there of me kind of aimlessly wandering around but still just doing the best that I could and standing by myself I knew that the understanding that I was searching for would eventually find me I just needed to stay consistent with myself but then it did eventually find me I did eventually you know see this vision of myself that would provide a good life for me in the future and as soon as that happened I was like okay so now I just need to get there as fast as possible now

I just need to do all the things as fast as possible and rush through them and just get there no no no unfortunately that is not what life is that's it's just simply not what life is I mean use that drive to get those tests done and to have you know perseverance behind the actions that you do have and the goals that you do have but there's been a lot of goals like timely goals like I need to have this done in a month that just simply don't happen and instead of being like getting down on myself and be like I'm not doing enough or this isn't working out for me let's just give up completely I was like all right you know it didn't work out this month it doesn't mean it's not going to work out eventually and let's just one step at a time keep working towards it and now

maybe i'm not exactly where i envisioned but i'm getting there finally like i'm seeing movement i am getting where i want to go and i think that is a big part of divine timing it's not on the time frame you might have imagined but it will eventually happen and work out and when it does happen you will get that aha moment that is just so good i had that yesterday after i completed 18 fucking art pieces to the point where my arms are sore like they are literally sore from doing so much art especially like you're like girl what how is that possible i don't know i don't know i had that aha moment that was like oh okay universe like i see you i am where i'm supposed to be it's all working out it all will work out the timing of it all is not my problem to stress

about what is my problem to stress about is commitment to self commitment to goals commitment to that inner vision that inner future that you do want and you do desire and never giving up on those things never giving up on yourself if you stand behind that the universe will stand behind you tenfold trusting the process is essential for growth and fulfillment have you ever done psychedelics i laugh at this because it's like can you tell can you tell are the holes in my brain making themselves that apparent yeah yeah i had a a lot of like psychedelic spring psychedelic summer and i mean i know most people wouldn't constitute molly as a psychedelic because it doesn't make you necessarily hallucinate. But in my opinion, I think I would classify it as a

psychedelic because it had similar effects on me that like that mushrooms or acid did. So is that my favorite psychedelic? Yes, but not in a good way. Not in a good way. Would I recommend it to anybody absolutely fucking not just because I think as soon as you do it it is a very very slippery slope I mean would I recommend anything to anybody no for that exact reason you know we all go on our different journeys we all have our different moments and sure I do think I you know I'm able to take good things out of all lessons and I was able to take good things out of you know my fucking molly benders but ultimately do i think those moments in those times were the best for my brain health or my personal health no and did it make me kind of a dopamine slut absolutely

absolutely i mean it was a dark time so i was like i'll take any fucking hit i can get but then the high i was chasing was not like oh i want to get stoned and like lay on my couch and do some art it was like no i i'm like itching for that dopamine hit and that's spooky scary spooky scary you know when you can't find happiness or light in your own life don't go searching for it in drugs now i've also done many a mushrooms we'll get into that i have done acid as well i've only done acid once i felt like it was too intense of a trip it was too much for me um i did not like the whole 12 hour thing like girl why do we take this at 10 p.m and now it's 10 a.m and i can't sleep and i'm exhausted and i'm still hallucinating shit like this isn't a good time it's not it's not

a good time it's not my cup of tea um and then yeah the whole mushrooms thing came about and that was mostly during covid i just had a plethora of mushrooms for some reason i will not get into it but i hate to say i had a great time on those not that i'm recommending it not that i'm recommending it but like it felt like the healthiest most natural option and i have some silly fucking stories from being on mushrooms i remember my two girly friends came over one night and we were supposed to have just like a chill let's put on a cute outfit and go out to dinner vibes and we ended up hitting a liquor store and then playing mr what is it called oh yes edward 40 hands but instead of like tall boys we did bottles of wine and I was I was staying in this

house for like the first time ever in my life and all of my roommates were gone so we taped these eight eight mushrooms taped these wine bottles to our hands and then hung out in the backyard with these beautiful little fairy lights going for like hours hours hours it was so fun it was so fucking fun um now those are delinquent young Hannah memories so please take that with a grain of salt am I saying that's what you need to go out and do to have fun no but it truly pushed me to levels that I was like why are the what the fuck am I doing right now like how did we come to this conclusion so yes I have done many a psychedelic and if you're going to do them please please have your like your safe adult with you you know have that trusted adult with you

your trip sitter your best friend make sure you have somebody around you who is level-headed trustworthy and that cares about you i don't think you should ever be doing any of these things alone um i think you should be in a safe environment i think you should make sure you're getting them from a safe place like if you're getting anything any sort of drug test that shit test it okay your life is not something to fucking play with test that shit please like i'm begging be safe i love you but yeah i had i definitely did way too many and now my thought process is just all over the fucking place and i can barely read so please take that as a word of caution from me hey hannah okay quick question for you so i am going to take a drug test for work here soon

and i'm so used to like smoking to just like help relieve some anxiety that i've got going on in my life i'm about to graduate and get a new job and i don't know where i'm gonna be living here in the next few months and like so much stuff is going on do you have any like remediations for anxiety that aren't smoking would love to hear your recs thanks oh my gosh yes i actually do um so first of all if you're like oh i just i don't think i can go sober for a drug test you need to go sober you know what i mean like i have definitely been that girl where it's like you did not need to fake that maybe you just needed a month off and it would have been good for you um it's always worth the drug test do you know what i mean usually the things in life that are hard to get the only

think standing between you and that is a drug test so you just get sober just take it girl proud of you for standing by that now oddly enough when i'm stressed as fuck um well we can be great because yeah reduce anxiety it's a great kind of like escaping mechanism in that sort of sense it slows down the thoughts a little bit um not that you should be utilizing it for that way but if you are like it makes sense um so think about like the ways in which you utilize weed or the effects that it has in your anxiety and how you can replace those healthily what kind of activities in your daily life do replace those things if it's like I have too much pent-up energy like the thoughts are moving too fast journaling speaking out loud having somewhere to dump those

thoughts and move on is so nice so nice I was having a lot of anxiety middle of the week and this is what the morning pages are for in the artist way I just never actually like brought myself to journal until I realized like no your journaling should not be oh what if my kids read this in 30 years it should be no one is ever going to read this it doesn't have to make sense you are not rereading it back it doesn't matter get out that energy get out those negative thoughts put them somewhere safe and keep it moving it feels so nice it feels so nice and having that commitment to yourself you don't have to do it every day you know I am because I think it it's having a better payoff doing it every day than not um but you know just when those anxieties are popping up

utilizing that journal putting them somewhere i think this is why a lot of people live on reddit it's because you can utilize those thoughts inside you can't put them somewhere safely you don't have to post them on the internet you know what i mean i do think a lot of people are probably just seeking companionship so i get that but also i think a lot of anxiety at least me personally is not based in reality and i truly can just safely take those thoughts out of my body put them somewhere else and get the same benefits so that's really great um if you have too much energy that you're trying to calm down like anxiety wise i do love like a quick yoga flow moving my body in any sort of way running i would get so much anxiety as a child and a teen that i

would be like i have to go on a run and my parents never thought anything of it because they're like yes she's being healthy and like my dad's literally a track runner so like hello um but i would it's because i had anxiety and duh hello the the way no one noticed like girl i'm going on a run at 11 p.m that's not normal at 12 and you're letting me run at night there's lots to think about but i would have so much anxiety within myself that i would go and i would run and run and run until i couldn't anymore and then i would walk home not only do you get that natural runner's high that feels like you just smoked weed or did molly or all of the other things all at once it also gets you a healthy place to kind of put that energy and not have

to carry it with you so much also underrated breathing techniques i'd love a good breathing technique working with your body working with slowing down your breathing focusing only on your breathing and not so much on your thoughts i think it's really great if you're interested in a breathing technique there's the 478 breathing technique uh the 478 breathing technique allows you to relax the sympathetic nervous system which is responsible for the fight or flight response while it activates your parasympathetic nervous system to bring you back to a normal heartbeat deeper breathing and a calmer mind essentially what you're gonna do is breathe in for four counts hold your breath for seven counts breathe out for eight counts and you do this i'll i'll explain you

breathe in through your nose for four you hold it for seven and then you breathe out through your mouth for eight if you sit down and do this a few times it does have a dramatic effect on your nervous system I'm not a meditation bitch I wish I could meditate I can't meditation is not going to help me slow down the thoughts in fact they're going to get faster and more out of control but doing something active breathing technique going for a walk going for a run little yoga flow simply putting my heart above my head for a second downward dog pose getting those thoughts out of my mind to a healthy place really really really helps and kind of has that same escapism slowing down technique that weed also seems to have on people with anxiety oh i guess speaking of how

to move through guilt from your previous unhinged alcoholic etc actions and then simultaneously back to back someone asked i think i'm a bad person and here's the thing maybe you were i mean listen maybe you were maybe maybe you were in that moment but that doesn't mean you will be forever a big part of being human is that we will never be perfect we will always make mistakes at some point. We simply are not gods, okay? That's the beautiful thing about being a human. We are able to make mistakes, good mistakes, bad mistakes, weird mistakes, any sort of action. We have choice and we may not always choose the right thing, but that doesn't mean we have to keep continuing to choose the wrong thing. I sit up here and give a lot of advice, but I'd be lying if I was like,

i'm an angel set from heaven i have never ever spoken bad or accidentally harmed or pooped or farted or like girl literally i am also human i have been probably a bad person before but the difference between a bad person and a normal human person is the bad person doesn't learn okay they harm they keep harming there's no learning sometimes it comes from a desire to do harm psychopathic shit you know like born fucking crazy but genuinely I feel like most of the time that's pretty rare and you're either born or taught that way most most of the bad fucking people I have encountered is from like self-depreciation like hatred of self not hatred of other people hatred of who you are and pushing yourself to feel worse and worse about it i did

something bad so i'm a bad person so i'm gonna keep doing bad things you don't have to keep digging this bigger hole for yourself i think a lot of women learn this lesson or just people in general from dating men i learned this lesson through my ex-boyfriend who was a proclaimed victim and bad guy i mean bitch hello where the red flag red flag his self-depreciation should have been a massive red flag but i was also unhealed and thought i could save him from himself spoil alert you cannot do that if they are a bad person take it at face value he would do this thing where he would do something really mean and go well i'm just a bad person like yeah but you don't you don't have to be this way like you are actively choosing to keep doing these

things and it would happen over and over and this was really confusing to me because I always knew change was an option like I never knew I never thought that I couldn't grow from this I never thought that like oh well I need to box myself in as this certain behavior this certain type of person no I always knew I could change and grow and ultimately do better if I wanted to so why the fuck could he not figure that shit out? You as an individual have to want the change and see good in yourself. A lot of people don't want good for themselves. They don't see the good in themselves. I don't think you're a bad person. I think you did a bad thing and sure that's not okay but it's human. Learn, grow, apologize, move forward. It's always an option in this life.

find peace in knowing you will always grow i fucking love this podcast i feel like such a big sister and it truly is like healing something in my heart because sometimes i read these questions and it's like no this is a safe space someone asked is it safe for my boyfriend to nut in me now that i have an iud please like i love that you come to me with this question it's never safe no matter what you have like i don't think anybody should ever take that risk keep that in mind um and please if you have medical questions ask your doctor but i love it so fucking funny i don't want to get on here and be like yeah girl go for it and then you're like nine months later popping out a new baby like never assume it's safe especially when it comes

to getting nutted in feeling so unhopeful with romantic love what am i doing wrong i don't think you're doing anything wrong i just think the general population out there sucks probably especially the dating pool like i think about this a lot like why the fuck did it take my hottest cutest smartest most incredible friend literally 10 years to find a boyfriend why hello and it's because the dating pool sucks genuinely nothing to do with you you could be the kindest and you probably are kindest smartest hottest sexiest woman in the entire world but if the men suck why the fuck would you get in a relationship with them this is one of those situations where i'd be like you know what it's not you it's them someone said i'm high as fucking can't remember are we

able to pre-order your fairy bongs this friday love you yes also this isn't a pre-order you order these and they are immediately shipped to you they have all been created the amount that we purchased is ready to go to your home asap okay so this is not something that you're like oh i'm gonna order this expensive thing and then wait eight months for it to finally be made and then two months for it to finally get shipped no these are ready to live in your home now come collect your favorite fairy and smoke with me are you into tarot if so any tips for beginners yes and don't come for me for the way i said tarot it is what it is um yeah i have been practicing this is probably my one consistent practice when it comes to spirituality and that's why i feel like i don't

always keep up with my altar or my sacrifices or my full moon rituals because i am always practicing tarot um i've been practicing since i was 14 and that's because when i was 14 i was a grunge little tumblr girl and i was always at my local witchy store buying new bones and jewelry and crystals and of course tarot cards now when i practiced with tarot cards when i was younger i only practiced on other people and then i went to a psychic like four years later and they were like no you like you are taking on too many weird energies and the energies are fucking up your personal energy because of the tarot that you're performing on other people so stop performing tarot on other people and only perform it on yourself because that'll be a way to connect

with yourself and yourself your spiritual side of yourself you know what i mean when you practice other people other people's energies get fucked up and then when you try and do personal readings you aren't getting the right outcome or just your general connection to self is all sorts of muddled So if I was going to be new to practicing tarot, and if you are new to practicing tarot, A, there are so many talented artists that spent time creating so many different types of decks and different art and different styles behind them. Take your time purchasing a tarot deck that really calls to you stylistically. And there's many different cards to work with.

Maybe you work with angel cards. Maybe you work with goddess cards. whatever cards that you work with make sure they are intentional behind the way you want to connect with the voice of the universe and make sure they're intentional to who you are artistic style wise uh the cards that i got i purchased eight months after seeing them in the store i was in lawrence kansas and lawrence on their main strip has this really cute i think it's called third planet little hippie dippy store metaphysical shop upstairs they have a the local baddies will get it upstairs they have a smoke shop and i remember that smoke shop is where i bought my

first ever pipe because my friend got a fake id when she was like 16 and then we all took a trip out to lawrence and we sent her inside secretly on facetime to like look at the pieces and then purchased through facetime through her with her fake id oh my god wow anyways they also sell tarot cards there duh hello and i remember seeing a pack there like one random night and then i kept thinking about it over and over and over and over again eventually i was like okay i have to take a trip out there just to get them because i live like an hour away so i went out there i bought them they are the cards that i have been using ever since and they are also the cards that i feel like I have the most clarity with and the messages are instant now everybody practices

different ways obviously you can do spreads 10 card spread three card spread there's many different spreads you can do based on what answers you're looking for but my favorite way listen I'm a quick and easy bitch my favorite way to use tarot cards is I just shuffle them and as I'm shuffling them this hand motion looks very scary but as I'm shuffling them I'm literally thinking not thinking speaking out loud my question I'm talking to the universe here's where I am here's where I'm wanting to go this is what I'm asking for clarity on and then as you do it eventually a card maybe two will fly out of the fucking deck it is what it is it will eventually happen it might take five minutes it might take five seconds a card will fly out of the deck I usually pick it up and flip

it over you know make sure whatever direction it's facing is honored and uplifted and then yeah that's my message very simple very easy quick to the point but I do this a lot I do this probably at least once every other week usually on the Newman in the full moon and then anytime that I'm like maybe having like a personal issue or seeking clarity on something and bitch it will not fucking lie to you if you stay connected to those cards working with them connected to yourself in the universe around you they will read you to filth there's been multiple times I have gone to those cards with like delusions of grandeur like oh my god he's cheating on me like he hates me he hates my guts please tell me and it's like card flips over you are in the best healthiest

relationship of your life and it's like oh oh yeah yeah i need that you're in the best healthiest relationship of your life and you are just seeking bad things right now oh heard thank you thank you for that humbling experience so yeah if you are interested in practicing or developing your spirituality i think tarot cards are very beginner friendly i think they are super fun and a great way to practice on a daily basis losing passion how to reconnect with myself don't want to lose my spark oh okay you know what i spend a lot of time alone but i realized how little time i actually spend with myself like a lot of that alone time is taken up with oh a youtube video in the background oh maybe like a little um podcast maybe you know something I always have something going

on in the background something that I'm participating with instead of participating with myself maybe it's a partner maybe it's friends and I mean that doesn't necessarily mean it's a bad thing it's just it just is what it is um and as I've been doing the artist way every week you are required to do an artist date which essentially if you think about it the artist state is really just intentional time with self it doesn't even have to be creating art like she gives examples of like okay we'll go to the art museum by yourself and go look at pieces go to the dollar store and go pick up random arts and crafts supplies and go home and put stickers on things like it doesn't matter just doing something intentionally creative with yourself and breaking

into that alone time is a great way to bring spark back. It is fantastic. And I understand that like time can get away from yourself. If you haven't connected with yourself for a long time, it can feel a little awkward. It can feel like, oh, who is she? What do we even do together? And we talked like last week about whimsy and play and engaging in more play with yourself. And that's really hard to get to if you don't simply break the barrier of being comfortable around yourself taking that intentional time to spend with self I think it's very easy to almost forget ourselves in that sort of way especially when society is fucked and very easy to distract ourselves on maybe you just have goals that aren't allowing you enough time but intentionally setting aside time to connect with

yourself to spend alone awkward time with yourself really brings that spark back very very quickly very quickly i have not created this much art in months in months probably since i mean november september october i don't know that that little seasonal area i was creating a lot of art and then I just completely got distracted by I mean crazy life things happening so I don't blame myself for getting distracted but remembering that it's important it's okay to want to spend time with myself to spend to set aside time for myself and no it's not selfish no I'm not putting my goals or my priorities behind me because this ultimately will help me keep that spark alive it will help me stay driven and persevere to those goals that i do have if you lose yourself you lose the passion

you lose the spark you lose the why of it all you start just doing things for the mundane tasks of it and i don't ever want you guys falling into the mundane i always want you guys to be able to connect to yourself to connect to the whimsy to see that like brighter light within you um it's okay to have it dim out every once in a while but feed that fuel take that time alone with yourself it could be doing anything it could be doing nothing but make sure there are no distractions even like i don't mind a distraction if it's like i'm gonna go to the movies alone i think that's great you're consuming art you are spending time alone with yourself maybe it's oh i really want to go to this restaurant let me take a moment to just take myself out to dinner maybe it's oh my

god well I can't fucking afford dinner but let me just sit down with my old colored pencils from seventh grade and do some coloring like I did yesterday I literally was at my parents house went into my attic immediately grabbed like all of my old art supplies because I realized I didn't have as much as I had wanted in my apartment brought them to my apartment sat down and I did art for eight hours yesterday maybe you don't have eight hours maybe you only have one or two it doesn't matter don't make excuses sit down be still with yourself it will ignite that spark it will bring you closer to yourself your understanding within yourself and your understanding outside of yourself it's important you are important time with yourself is important

there's nothing selfish about it don't let people convince you otherwise that was a big issue that i had coming back to work where it's like i needed time away to deal with very important a like i was so sick i'd strep at the flu at the same time like i needed to take care of myself also my cat's sick i had to watch him after surgery and all the fucking men around me are like oh how was vacation oh my god i can't believe you still work here oh wow we haven't seen you in forever oh my god guilt trip guilt trip guilt trip and it was like you ugly ass bitches have never once done something for yourself you don't even know what it's like to prioritize yourself so when you see people around you actually doing good things for themselves actually taking the time they need actually

connecting with themselves you get jealous as fuck you shame them the same way you shame yourself it's sad it's sad don't don't fall into becoming that person who never connects with themselves who never spends time with themselves who never prioritizes themselves there's no one more important in this life but you and who you are and how you uplift and support yourself how to get comfy dressing girly miniskirts dresses heels sandals etc okay well i'm sure i look very girly today but this is like a very comfortable like very chill outfit if i was going out with this and i wanted to dress it up i would throw on a pair of kitten heels okay no more than a fucking half inch i'm talking kitten heels teeny tiny they dress it up very easily if i'm going out

to run errands i'm gonna throw on maybe a pair of ballet sandals is what i was going for um or very simple chic flip-flops you're like girl flip-flops yes okay as long as those toes are done a little toe ring on cute very running errands coded but this is literally a los angeles apparel 100 cotton dress it has a cute cut okay girls are pushed up and out very comfy though because it's this really comfy stretchy cotton material that basically feels like i'm wearing a pj dress win win win i mean having your hair and makeup done also helps i've found finally the way to do my hair that is not so time consuming it's just blow drying it wow who would have fucking thought um blow drying it after i get out of the shower taking that time to

that 15 minutes that it takes to blow dry my hair so when i wake up in the morning it's actually cute and i don't have to put any work into it work smarter not harder immediately chic elegant hot sexy minimal effort highly comfortable fabrics matter if i'm wearing a mini skirt i'm wearing shorts underneath it i don't need my pussy lips flapping in the breeze all right none of us need that. No one needs that, dare I argue. So yeah, I will buy the skort. I will put on the pair of mini shorts under my mini skirt so I feel more comfortable. I will wear the shorter heel because I'll be able to actually walk and my calves won't be burning. My shins won't have splints the next day. I won't be waking up with charley horses. The most stylish people are not the ones who look the

most uncomfortable unless dare i argue you are at a festival or a music festival like you better go all fucking out and then put on the comfy shoes you know get those pictures girl coachella's coming up but for everyday life the girls who look the best are the ones who are in outfits that they put on because they knew they'd be comfortable they feel good in it you can tell those are those girls that you're like oh wow i wish i had that outfit it's not because of what they're wearing it's because of how they're wearing it the comfortability the ease that they are exuding hey hannah okay so love the podcast um been a long time listener since day one oh my gosh always clocked into spoke sesh but my question also is like kind of a story slash something that

i just wanted to tell you because i thought you'd appreciate it but um okay so i got out of like a year-long relationship oh which was like a two-year situation ship I know I know okay we don't need to talk about that um so yeah all together I knew this guy for like three years it basically felt like we were dating the whole time but um by the end of the relationship he just like sucked the life out of me and I felt like a shell of a person and like I just didn't have any life to me and I was so embarrassed I didn't even tell any of my friends that we like broke up because this man did me so dirty and um so like he like really chipped out like the my self-perception like physically if that makes sense like i feel like i have enough security to

know like what i like what i don't like what i want and like feeling like i can be a person in the world but he like really chipped at my self-image and i'm still trying to build that back up and it's really hard like how do you do it like how do you get through that um because it it was like the whole stereotypical like oh he wouldn't like he just like had like a like a wandering eye like wouldn't stop like following women on instagram anyway this is all to say how do i build that back up i will say listening to smoke sesh more recently has like gotten my spirits backed up back up i'm like i'm like alive again and it's not a coincidence that when i like went through a period of time where i wasn't listening to smoke sesh i was dating this man

and then like once we got out of a relationship i started like listening to smoke sesh again and i was like wait i think that's like it just makes sense if you listen to spoke sesh like you are a baddie anyway i just wanted to i just wanted to tell you that love you oh my god i love you clocked in i love to hear it listen it's okay it's okay we've all we've all been through this before if you dated a man in general like especially young i'm sure you have been through this before and I know the easiest thing or not even the easiest like the most duh thing here is like it's not you it's him but when you get so attached and enthralled with somebody and how they think and just like the attachment of it all it's very easy to kind of start blaming yourself

in that sort of way like instead of looking at the reality of it all which is like what you know now is just like he's a piece of shit and he's gonna have a wandering eye even if he is with which he was with the hottest sexiest baddest bitch but like he could be laid up there with bella hadid and he would still be scrolling on instagram following random bitches from your town that you haven't spoken to in five years like what the fuck he's just a bad person he's just a bad person but the thing about funny thing about bad people is they always like have a catastrophic wake wherever they go they have no like care about anybody in their circle so they have this way of like demolishing all of these places they go to around them and then leaving this like trail

of disaster behind them unfortunately you did fall victim slightly not completely you sound like a very sane amazing wonderful woman individually but like of course he had some sort of effect on you that was negative and it is with your self-perception i have been there okay with my evil ex i'm sure you've heard enough about him he inflicted a lot of trauma on me that i had to heal from but one of them was like I came out of that relationship a shell of an individual and not really knowing who I was because I was so caught up and lost in the drama of it all and his problems for so long that my individuality was completely lost and I think I was chasing that in the wrong direction where I felt like well I need to get back to who I was I need to

get back to this girl I was before like I want to have that sense of personality and individuality but the thing is there's never any going back there's never any going back there is only going forward unfortunately transformation is the only way um but this is a really great beautiful time for you to reintroduce yourself to yourself get to know yourself a little bit more try out new clothing the growth period i went through after my evil ex was so quick and fast because i was not afraid to try different things sure i had no clue what the fuck i was doing but it was like you know what cute that girl does that thing i'm gonna try it out you know i'm gonna see if it works i'm gonna see if it doesn't work i'm gonna be wild and crazy here i'm gonna wear this crazy

outfit i'm gonna bleach my hair like fuck it you have all this pent-up energy if you sit there with that pent-up energy and just ruminate and ruminate you're gonna stay stuck but if you allow yourself to keep transforming keep trying new things put yourself out there that individuality will come back instantly so much faster than you ever could have imagined and you are a smart girl you listen to this podcast you got a strong head on those shoulders you are so brave and smart to know that that was not what you needed to get out of there to know that you know this man was a piece of shit and that wasn't what i deserved so i know you're smart enough to take advantage of this time and to really prioritize yourself during this time get to know yourself get to spend time

with yourself to try new things to be brave in any sort of sense that you want to be brave in but i love you and thank you for listening i promise that individuality will come back i promise you that sense of worth that sense of self it will the further away you get from him the stronger your relationship with yourself will get and the more you'll be able to understand that like what you went through was shitty but it's because of him you know you did nothing wrong like you can't change yourself into a person he likes because simply he doesn't even fucking like himself babe i'm watching all these girlies outside like walk down the street to the parade day drinking and the little devil inside my brain is like well do we start do we also start day

drinking no it's it is 11 a.m girl get it together where do i find a man that will let me be a woman oh let me break the news to you he's not wearing that dangly earring he is not posting his outfits on pinterest i hate to say it and not to shame like if you are a more feminine man i love that i love that we are able to be ourselves and truly connect to whichever side or drive that calls to you no shame no shame please just be who you are don't lie to yourself all right um but if you are looking for a manly man i also don't think he's the buff working out 24 7 only eating protein andrew tate style-esque man that they that men think they should be i think that's stupid as fuck and honestly kind of more feminine because they are

only thinking about the male gaze in itself this i think the real men are the ones who see women fully for who they are and stand beside them 10 toes down support uplift want to see them win and succeed no matter what those are the manly men okay they don't have a certain look to them they don't have a certain style or things to look out for in a physical sense it is all about how they treat women do they see women as people oh my god oh my god do they see women as people or do they see them as competition that's not a man do they see them as people do they want to support and uplift the women in their lives do they see the value of the women in their lives do they only see women as sexual objects no bad not a man do they see women as full whole

rounded real people oh my god dare i say that's a lot to ask for this day and age like what the fuck but i think if you're trying to weed out the weak ones the ones who are gonna drag you down to the pits of hell who will be in a competition with you the entire time who will ultimately hate you while also dating you simultaneously the way to weed those out is to be a strong-willed bitch okay i think women are too afraid of being a bitch nowadays oh i don't want to be a bitch so like sure i'll say yes oh i feel bad so i'll go on that date girl fuck him fuck him if he's a dumb ass tell him he's a dumb ass like if you have boundaries stand by those fucking boundaries don't let people walk over them be yourself don't try and succumb yourself or push yourself down

in order to make a man feel comfortable he should be the one pulling out the chair for you he should be the one making you comfortable you know what i mean and those weak ass men are scared terrified of a real ass bitch so don't be afraid don't be afraid it'll weed them out very quickly they will have a negative adverse reaction you will notice it don't feel bad about it just know they can't fucking handle you they can't take the heat they can't support you cut that shit off quick keep it pushing all right i guarantee if you waste your time like only focusing on what three people think about you you're eventually gonna just stay within those three people and make it work but if you work with 3,000 people you will look at those options you will take your time you'll go around

and you will have a better outcome do you know what I mean it's like the whole job search thing it's like I'm not going to waste my time only applying to three places of course I'm probably going to hear no I'm going to waste my time applying to 3,000 places and ultimately I'm going to walk out there with a yes and it will probably be a better yes than the one that if I just doled myself down to fit a smaller group of things does that make sense that might be the weed talking i hope my strange allegories resonate inside you i hope you guys are picking up what i'm putting down you know what i mean but yeah girl in this day and age please don't be afraid to be a real ass bitch the real men will find you they will find you and it will feel amazing

it'll feel great it'll feel like you're on molly practically you're like wow this exists this is real like i can feel happy that's crazy also speaking of just being a real ass bitch i think we're lacking them in this day and age everybody wants to be so like consumable in the sense of like but i need to fit into this group and then i need to fit into this group and i need to make sure everybody fucking likes me listen there's something to be said about a woman who is herself myself i mean she could be i could definitely not like her and she could be a bitch but at least in the back of my head i'm like at least she's a real ass bitch at least she's not gonna come up to my face and be like i love you and then turn around and talk shit about me behind my back fake ass

bitches at least she's a real ass bitch at least we know we don't like each other and we can move on all right like we can just understand that and find peace in that i love a real ass bitch for that reason like you don't have to be liked by everybody you can have standards you can be who you are you can stand by those things of course don't be mean and evil and a bad person like we were talking about before don't be rude to people don't be disrespectful like that's not a real ass bitch i would argue that is a fake ass bitch as well but i think there's something just admirable about being who you are and standing beside that and not letting anybody tell you fucking differently oh my god divine timing someone said ps you're so good at coming up with analogies that actually

work and get the message across it's crazy okay thank you thank you not me literally needing to hear that because sometimes i feel like i'm speaking in riddles like a bridge troll and like if you get it you get it you can cross the bridge but most people are probably not crossing that fucking bridge bitch so i'm glad i'm glad this i fucking make sense oh love need to quit my job oh my hostile job with misogynistic and hateful managers but scared me as fuck you and me both girl at least you know you're not alone how i'm kind of gay planning it listen my parents taught me never quit a job until you have another one lined up because if you become if you quit a job and you don't have another one lined up of course you still have to make money and you become

a little bit more desperate and then you're going to probably end up working a job you hate more which can then drive you i guess if you're good at working with energy into a better direction but let's just skip that step entirely and have something else lined up so i always keep that in the back of my head where it's like if you even if you hate it it's at least stable money is depositing into your account now if the money was not depositing get the fuck out of there but it's hitting every two weeks on friday like period we at least have that stability there now getting there and dealing with it is a whole nother i like ordeal because of course not everything is for money and it is probably draining you but I do love the idea of applying

to jobs while on company time on the company computer like girl fuck you fuck you I'm gonna go take that bathroom break I'm gonna scroll on indeed for 15 minutes I'm gonna go apply to 15 other jobs on your dime period in restaurants I just start stealing things I'd be like well I'm gonna go anyways so i'm gonna take toilet paper i'm gonna take like shot glasses i'm gonna take bottles not me admitting to stealing please don't come for me it's just petty theft nothing crazy and it's only in the past it's not now don't come for me um but i i'd be like well i'm not spending any more of my money on toilet paper i'm gonna steal some even in college i would do that i see the massive fucking rolls of like the one-ply toilet paper i'd be like well i need it more than

you you're taking enough of my fucking money through my tuition girl fuck you but like get what you can out of it before you dip apply to those jobs on company time have that fuck the system kind of mentality when you go in there so you don't give as much of a fuck people like that ultimately like want to get to you and want them to think want you to think about them as much as they're thinking about you or want you to suffer as much as they are but you can't let them win you can't let them win ultimately it's like you're fighting good versus evil and you cannot let that devil crawl inside of you it's not worth it you don't have to be miserable like I said as long as that check clears we're good and yeah just having more to look forward towards knowing you

will be off in a better place sooner rather than later and they'll be stuck miserable for the rest of your lives I find a lot of peace in that truly hey Hannah left the pod I just finished my second quarter at art school I'm a freshman and oh my god that burnt me out so much I have one more left for the rest of the year I'm really happy and where I am and my degree and what I'm doing and I think it's a really good school for me but my lord the burnout what any advice because I'm not at the point where it's like I'm hating my passion I chose a career where I know that my hobbies and my passions and my education career are kind of intertwined but not so intertwined that I will get burned out from the things that make me happy but just in terms of academics and

the day-to-day like how do I not crash and keep good grades I don't know if that made sense but any advice that would be great I love you thank you so much I actually think a lot of you are going through academic burnout right now I mean now's the time that's why they literally have spring break right now it's because the teachers are crashing out it's because the students are crashing out like finals basically just happened and now we're basically at finals again the spring moves so fast and it does have this silly way of burning out I think people faster than maybe the winter semester does because summer's right there I mean summer's right there hello I don't want to be fucking doing this it's warm out it's sunny out summer's right here like i can see the finish

line but it would be so much easier just give up now than to cross that finish line now i am glad you're pursuing something you do enjoy so it's like that underlying passion that fire never gives out but like when it comes to the bullshit of it all like i don't want to take this fucking test i don't want to memorize all fucking however many bones there are and nervous systems in the body like I'm over it I have done enough I feel like I'm gonna crash out soon whenever you have a moment to yourself such as spring break a little break here or there a long weekend even a weekend in general maybe a day maybe even just an afternoon whenever you have that time for yourself you got to get a little selfish you got to prioritize that self-care I understand like when it comes

a final season and you have to put that aside but you have to kind of make up for that lost time eventually so whenever you do find those down times where it's like okay i'm not pushing so hard finals wise like i know finals are coming up so let's kind of re-energize a little bit let's kind of build up that energy that preserve that energy inside of us so then when it does come to having to utilize it we have extra built up take those times get a little selfish have that self-care day go to that spa have that massage session do that yoga flow if it helps you move your body you feel like you've been sitting too long eat that good meal make that bread you want to make like just spend time with yourself in whichever way makes you feel passionate and

recovered and prioritize those times really take those times whenever you have them don't just fall victim to being like oh i do have a moment to myself let me sit and scroll on my phone for eight hours like there's other things you could be doing during that time that will actually make you feel well rested that will help your nervous system and that will replenish that energy that you will eventually have to use again when it comes to the next final season or whatever but there is something about when the weather gets warmer that it's like I'm over it I just I want to get outside so maybe go get outside if you have to go study do your flashcards outside in the sunshine before you have to go lock yourself away in the library take advantage of

those moments you do have I think it's so important especially to keep ourselves going to replenish that energy and to have that residual energy to use when maybe we are feeling a little bit lower than usual it's important school is important but the way to keep going through school is to make sure you're taking care of yourself you can't just be a vessel trying to memorize things like you're not going to be able to memorize them you won't have any space in your brain your brain will be dehydrated you won't have any iron you'll be like on the bridge of passing out feed yourself take that time to yourself sit in some sunshine if you've got it it's important you are important ways to combat my bitchiness i complain too much and want to feel more positive oh i guess on the

other side if you're too bitchy i mean i feel like when i become this like uh just like almost like depressive angry person it's because there's something in my life that I'm very deeply unhappy with and I just haven't addressed it yet maybe I just don't know what it is yet or maybe I do know what it is and I'm completely running away from it but as soon as you address that part of yourself whether it's like I fucking hate my job but like we need to work on the way that I visually understand it and also maybe start looking towards other things that really levels out my bitchiness it makes me stop complaining so much maybe it's oh i'm really unhappy with something interpersonally who knows there's always just something that is slowly bothering you in the back of your head

turning your smile into a frown turning everything more negative than it really needs to be and as soon as you're able to understand what that thing is be brave enough to combat it because it will help you from becoming just a miserable depressed person like i said work with a lot of miserable depressed people who it's like constant complaining oh i wish i wasn't in this position i wish this didn't happen to me blah blah blah i literally had a coworker get fired for this from because she was complaining to customers about how much she hates her job and this place sucks and i work for misogynistic men and they just hate me and blah blah blah like honestly kind of spitting facts girl but you cannot say that to the customer sitting at your bar

while also chugging straight vodka out of your 40 ounce tumbler it's just not gonna come off good i promise you so instead of becoming that person who complains secular complains does the same thing again complains done is the same thing again try and look outside the box try and figure out those problems instead of just complaining about them like if shit sucks yeah it might suck but that doesn't mean you can't find a way out of it do you know what i mean find that thing that's bothering you fix it to the best of your ability at least address it that will help tenfold but if you can fix it if you can find a way out of it if you can redirect your thought process really helps with the bitchiness thoughts on nudes um personally in a long-term loving committed

relationship safety safety safety love a nude love a nude i i don't want to receive a nude i don't know i mean i'm literally around him all the time but like occasionally he works a lot so like sure i'll send a little titty pic send a little ass photo you know what i mean but like do i want an unsolicited dick pic no no no no one wants that i don't think i mean at least as a straight woman i don't think many women want duh unsolicited dick pic or even i guess solicited i don't know but when i was on my girls trip this past summer and i was gone for two weeks it was the longest we'd ever been away from each other in basically five years and yeah you know what i liked a little i liked a little sexy pic every once in a while duh keeps the spark alive and i'm not

believe it or not i am not great with my words like especially when it comes to like sexting i'm not a sexter i can't put into words what i want to do with you without like getting secondhand embarrassment and not wanting to press send like i would rather just take a picture of my fat ass god's given gift and send it to you so you can drool over it i think in my opinion that's much easier now i think if you are young and if you are going through like flings in these relationships i think you should be very careful about who you are entrusting with these pictures um i think you should be very careful about thinking about that yes anything that you put out there into the world through your phone is there forever and um you should be aware of

the people that you're sending it to and i do think that people need to earn trust from you before you just start doing these things uh please safety safety safety safety like i said i'm not here to fear monger i think you should be young hot sexy and take as many photos of yourself as you want if you are randomly scrolling through your photos one day and it's like oh my cute cat oh food oh random screenshots oh tits sorry i didn't mean to show that like just be aware okay yeah and like if i was in a relationship with a woman and she sent me pictures of titties at 11 a.m i'm not complaining oh my god are you kidding me anyways with that being said we have come to the end of our episode I know I'm so sorry but I had

such a good time hanging out with you guys today it was so fun I always have such a great time here on these podcasts I feel like my morning journal sessions that I do with myself are very similar to the sit-downs I have with this podcast like I feel like not only do I get to connect myself but I also get to connect to the community around me which is even more amazing and I'm just so thankful for all of the opportunities you've provided me and for the growth you guys have provided me and for being brave enough to get up here with me and maybe admit our faults or admit where we want to go have our hopes and dreams and to stand proudly beside them I am genuinely so lucky to have this experience on earth with you guys and I am just so thankful for every single one of you

whether you are a new listener or a long time listener simply showing up for me and showing up for yourself is just so inspiring and truly the biggest blessing in my entire life so thank you thank you thank you thank you I am so so lucky to have every single one of you you are so important you are so loved you were all my little smoke sesh fairies oh i love you guys so much if you want to support me if you would like to purchase a fairy bong something that i have been just so incredibly excited to share with you guys they will be available on the spring equinox thursday at 12 p.m est i know i mentioned last week friday there still should be some available on friday so if you're planning on friday don't stress please but they are limited edition

limited quantities so if you're thinking about it there will not be a restock babe get it while it's hot a rarity as fairies are and they should be shipped in time for us to smoke together on 420 maybe i'll do a 420 live stream oh my god maybe i'll do a 420 live stream could you imagine how fucking fun something to think about if you're interested let me know um but if you want to see extra from me join the patreon patreon.com smoke says shawty i'll be doing an extra episode on the spring equinox so if you want to hang out then come join um and if you want to see you know my little photo shoot if you want to see what the pink fairy bong looks like follow me on instagram at hannah marlene i had i did the super fun photo shoot um and i will be posting photos of what the

pink one looks like as well and i will post that as soon as they are available so turn those notifications on and come smoke with me you guys i'm so excited now these will be available canastyle.com they will be available on the canastyle website not through me it is just this beautiful collaboration that they offered to me and i'm so excited about that but at canna style 12 p.m est on thursday the spring equinox let's ring in this new brightened time together and let's celebrate a little bit together you know what i mean girls but that being said i love you all so very much cheers stay sexy stay sane and i'll see you all so soon Thank you.