Smoke Sesh - finding your life path, cutting people off & munchies

Episode Date: December 10, 2021

Happy Friday everyone!! Sorry Thursdays podcast got messed up but here it is! Today hannah talks everything from toxic friends, cutting people off, men, situationships, CBD, munchies, confessionals, tana vs hannah and how to find your life path. Come hang let’s talk and let’s light up welcome to smoke sesh with Hannah!

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, someone to look out for them. Some people call me their internet big sister, others their fairy smoke mother. You can call me Hannah, the new host of Smoke Sash. So come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life. Some good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing. I've got a story for it all. Alright, good morning everybody. i like every intro i have it's like i'm waking you guys up hey good morning how did you sleep

it's like when i was a nanny again like hello we gotta wake up um it's 1 30 in the afternoon i i've been up for hours if we're being completely honest it's friday happy friday i don't think i've ever told you guys that before because i always upload on tuesdays and thursdays um but sorry about that the app that I use to like record and distribute all of my podcasts it was down and not working because apparently I didn't have the most recent version of my iPhone downloaded whatever problem solved we're back into it we're back to having a great time I hope you guys had a great time Tuesday we had a little sex talk um I was getting like a very random amount of like sex related questions so i was like let's just knock this out let's just i'm gonna answer every sex

related question i've gotten and i got 10 times more after that so i'm gonna keep answering your questions um throughout the podcast i probably won't do like a sex topic one for a while i like to keep them random but i hope you guys enjoyed i literally did not look at the analytics at all until today three days later because I could not access the app um and bitch four four thousand of you guys have listened to that shit four thousand of you guys have listened to that shit in three days that is like mind-blowing to me every day I wake up I didn't even think I would be on a chart of some kind and every day I wake up and I'm like oh my god I'm charting I'm still charting still literally we've been in the top 50 us podcast for like two weeks now we're going on three weeks baby

let's keep it up thank you guys so much so many of you guys are like i am telling everybody about your podcast literally i've converted all of my friends to it me and my roommates sit down and listen to it together like me someone was like me and my boyfriend were listening to you guys like oh my god i love that thank you guys so much like i love the energy i love the enthusiasm you guys are giving back to me because i love doing this i love hanging out with you guys talking to you guys being real honest and open um it is like some of the most fun i have been having lately and it's what quite honestly is waking me up in the morning um so thank you i owe you guys everything i appreciate you guys showing up for me and i'm here to show up for you so with that being said um it

is what 1 30 on friday let's get into some questions so i can get this shit out to you guys so you can have a great weekend and i can too let's see what we have all right first question we got on the books today i'm gonna read you guys it's a little long prepare i'm also gonna be ripping this bowl so prepare for that as well but we're gonna get into the topic of jealous friends i know um hi first of all i love you second a question topic for the podcast jealous friends my absolute best friend that i've known for years has always been trying to compete with me in every aspect appearance relationships weight etc constantly saying i'm always trying to one up her and everything i do but i'm not even a competent a competitive person at all she's my

best friend and that's not what friends do she's constantly saying how she wished her body looked like mine or saying how she wished she was in a relationship like mine and no matter how much i try to affirm that i'm not a not better than her in any way and that she's beautiful she never believes me it just feels like i can brag about anything that's i can't brag about anything that's going on in my life or she will accuse me of trying to one-up her the relationship just always feels so hostile and i don't know what to do since she's my only friend okay um i valid i feel like a lot of us have had friends like this in our past um or currently um i feel like low-key i don't know how old you are but I went through a situation similar to this not personally but um with some

people in my friend group in like middle school um first of all that is not a friend I know you said that is your only friend unfortunately that is not a friend um your friends don't see you as competition your friends should not see you as like something that they need to put down something that they need to control um it sounds like she has a lot of internal issues going on personally with her own appearance with her own like self-worth and that is not something you can fix um to everybody whether they are your friend your partner anything you cannot fix somebody else's self-worth because then they inherently are going to base their self-worth on you okay and that is just not beneficial to either parties involved quite honestly um

to grow your self-worth you have to find it in yourself you've defined what makes you feel good about yourself um and how to grow that and it really does need to come with from within or else it is not going to be a sustainable sense of self-worth okay i know you're her friend i know you want to help as a friend of course you want to help we want to be the best friend that we can possibly be right unfortunately for you I genuinely think that this relationship is not benefiting you at all it seems like a one-sided relationship seems like they're dragging you down it seems like maybe in the future you guys could possibly come back together be great people but right now there's some soul searching that you both need to do because you a need to focus on yourself

and not have somebody that's going to bring you down put you down not want to share those successes with you because a friend is somebody who will celebrate you no matter what will share your successes be excited for your successes you know what I mean there is no competition going on all right and you both need to separate so she can figure out her self-worth how where that needs to come from and so you can grow on your own and not have somebody pulling you down and that that straight up might sound harsh that might sound harsh but I have been in situations where it is like this person needs professional help I am not that person and if I stay here I am simply going to drown with them and that is not okay sometimes you do need to protect yourself you said this is

your only friend which is probably making you attach a little bit more closely onto that person but listen friends come from everywhere everywhere i'm it sounds like you might be in school join some clubs some things that you um never would have tried before or have piqued your interest and you simply haven't tried before sign up for new classes um sit next to a new person in class it is so simple how quickly friends become friends because all of the friends that i have made that are like incredible friends like always there for me are the people that it's just like you strike up a random conversation and it feels like somebody you've known for the rest for your like entire life and it just like the puzzle pieces fit and you're good you know what I mean

it's very random it's very like a like example um one of my good friends in college straight up i met her um in my nursing program and i just kind of like sat next to her she wasn't somebody that i really thought like you really can't tell who's gonna be a good friend just by appearance but i don't i don't know i just sat next to her and then i started talking about weed and boom just like everything clicked and we have been besties to this day i haven't seen her in years but like we still facetime all the time she's incredible she will always be there for me things will just click randomly but you have to set yourself up for those situations if you simply do not set yourself up those situations they will not occur okay but you deserve better friends

period point blank at the end of the day a good friend is not somebody who is jealous a good friend is not somebody who is competitive a good friend is somebody who will share your success or will celebrate your success with you you know what i mean speaking of friends literally okay one of my friends i've known him for years literally grew up together like kindergarten oh my god so fucking funny um this is how you know you have good friends when you would just like randomly come together and you guys will just like click and mesh just message me he was like oh my god trixie and katya are coming to you guys i feel like if you follow me you have to know who trixie and katya is everybody knows who trixie and katya is i feel like i the content i create

also caters to the same kinds of people um but he just messaged me and was like Trixie and Kati are coming to Kansas City and the show is sold out but I bought two um tickets for the second row center literally just messaged me that I was like bitch send me your PayPal information I I can get you I will get you the money ASAP literally those are your friends those are your friends okay the people who show up for you all right people who will go to shows with you have fun like there's no drama there's no competition oh but i'm so excited merry christmas to me the tickets were like 200 be like fuck it trixie and katya are you kidding me together in one space love it i'm so fucking excited if you're gonna be there oh my god meet and greet we can hang

out afterwards i would be so down also when it comes to friends and like making good close uh relatable friendships for me personally some of my best and closest friends are people that are completely opposite of me and no i'm not saying oh i'm a hippie little you know girly like peace love and my friends are trump supporters no that's not what i mean but by different than me i feel like values and morals do definitely need to be on like the same level same stage um i've gotten a few questions like well oh my god i almost dropped my fucking phone well can people have two different political opinions no no i genuinely believe that um i because like it comes with politics now it comes to a sense of morals do you have the same morals as me unfortunately that's what politics

are right now because one side of politics is completely disregarding everybody else's morals um and forcing them to do things they do not want to do but um i'm talking about the right obviously i am very much so a left-leaning person um if you have not been able to tell you cannot get along with somebody like in a relationship sort of level sure you can have conversations with them you could probably like be a person to them but i don't think you can have like a relationship with somebody who has differing morals than you i just think it causes way too much conflict um i was in a my ex i thought like i got into a relationship with this man thinking he was very much so like a left-leaning like person and then i would bring up conversations

about politics and it would be like right-wing shit and i was like caught off guard like what the fuck how dare you think these things like how you dare you think that like women shouldn't be allowed to have their own bodily autonomy you know what i mean like choose for their own like and it kind of caught me off guard because i was like whoa i don't know this fucking person like i don't like this fucking person because they have horrible morals and sense of judgment so do i think that people can be friends and like have a relationship with people with differing political beliefs no but when I say that all of my friends are very different from me um yes you know I'm a very like hippie dippy smoke weed peace love kind of girly I have friends who are like I want to be

a cowboy baby I got friends who are like nurses I have friends who are like sorority girls like I have friends who are very different characters than me does that make sense and I think having friends and opening yourself up to like being friends with people who are very much so different than you have a different style have a different way of presenting themselves have different interests is what makes you a very much so more rounded more um understanding more better person um and the friendships where you guys are completely different are kind of better because you have so much to talk about you have so much to learn from each other you have so much to um like so many new things to discover um about the world that you maybe wouldn't have known before

so i think yeah being friends with people who are a little bit different from you 10 out of 10 great idea someone else asked me my favorite healthy high foods um i'm a big believer that if you have the munchies you eat whatever you want straight up i think you should eat whatever you want um you should make yourself feel good if you're craving it get it you know um that's like the best part of having the munchies is food tastes so great you know that's literally like the best part is like food is incredible um and i do think weed in a sense when i did have a little bit of an eating disorder and kind of started smoking weed the munchies helped me kind of bring my appetite back um and get more interested in food and enjoy food more and kind of bring back

that relationship with food but now if you are a constant smoker a constant choker um you're gonna be hungry all the time and the munchies well for me personally i feel like the munchies have kind of died down a little bit like i don't get them as super duper hard anymore like of course i'm gonna crave stuff while i'm high but at this point i can just like rationalize and be like hannah you just ate an entire pizza obviously you're not still hungry you just have the munchies um and then like yeah a little healthy snack would be great um maybe if you like pre-make a dessert have like a little dessert for yourself i love like fresh fruit fresh fruit fruit is candy itself okay like good fresh fruit like raspberries like chilled raspberries strawberries you could do

chocolate dipped strawberries apples and peanut butter but put those fucking apples in the fridge apples are only good if they come out of the fridge like that crisp oh my god popcorn season that shit up pretzels season that shit up um anything like munchie fun i 10 out of 10 really enjoy but um i personally like when i get the munchies i usually have just been eating normal throughout my entire day and for me personally i've kind of come to the realization that my munchies are straight up i'm just dehydrated and i need water um my brain like gets those and many of our brains do they get those um signals confused and um instead of feeling like you're thirsty

you will feel like you're in fact um hungry so i'm 10 out of 10 my first like my mom would always tell me this too like are you sure you're not thirsty are you sure not thirsty are you sure not thirsty and people like i saw a tiktok the other day and it's like my mom trying to give me an eating disorder by asking me if i just want water instead of food it's like no like our brains actually get those signals confused a lot and instead of thinking oh i need to go drink a glass of water you're gonna be like oh i want to go fucking eat like period when sometimes you just need water or if you just like eat water heavy foods fresh fruit though when you're fucking high there's really nothing better or a charcuterie board oh my god cheese grapes love it that would

be my 10 out of 10 like um high food i told my boyfriend the other day i was like if i ever give birth to your child after that birth i am expecting like an arrange like a charcuterie board a range of food fresh crackers fresh cheeses i don't care where the fuck you have to go to get that if i have to go through labor for your child i want that charcuterie board asap because that like what's better than like foraging for your food and like putting little sandwiches together and like little spreads and little cute like fresh fruit oh my god nothing nothing is better than that but i always say this this would be a great christmas present a hydro flask my friend just said there are hydro flasks on sale right now go get yourself go get yourself a hydro flask

get a hydro flask with the straw lid okay draw on the side put little stickers on the side whatever makes you want to carry it around more get a fun color um and keep that shit on you 24 7 i guarantee a lot of your munchies are probably you're just dehydrated also get up and go drink a glass of water right now i'm telling myself that right now because i've only had coffee and no water today and i know if i'm dehydrated you're probably dehydrated too so get the fuck up and go drink a glass of water asap babes but actually i think i've said this once here now here's the thing i said i don't like to eat healthy food when i have the mungies that's very valid that's very valid i very much so like to eat unhealthy things when i get the mungies but my go-to like go-to food

when i have the munchies and when i've ever had the munchies like since i've been in high school smoking go to 7-eleven get yourself a pack of like cheddar cheez-its okay and a thing of orange juice i know i know i know your breath is gonna be hitting hitting after you eat these so like maybe pack a gum after um brush your teeth but the most incredible combination of flavors in your mouth you will ever taste cheddar cheez-its and orange juice let me know your favorite munchie combination or your favorite munchie food um feel free to send them over to my dms i don't really give a fuck i'm like very much so interested because i love new combinations of food uh my instagram is at hannah marlene but yeah cheddar cheez-its and orange juice and then maybe some

like um you know the twin snakes gummies they're like little snakes and they're stuck together and one snake is sweet and one snake is sour and they're gummy those bitches anything else i don't give a fuck about those bitches the cheeses and the orange juice sold that's all i asked for from the gas station i also got a question about cbd and if i've ever tried it and if i'm interested in it and here's the thing i i love cbd i love cbd okay love it and here's the here's why i use it it's literally so universal first of all we have a sponsor ah i know i okay i have worked with them for a long time this is our first sponsor really i've worked with them forever and incredible company the best people to ever work with with such a great company the like way they're running

it and the goals they're trying to achieve I think is incredible and the reason they started it is incredible the company is called Paz Pax um you can find them on Instagram at Paz or oh my god at P-A-Z P-A-C-K-S um I have them tagged all over my Instagram page because I use them quite honestly all the time but they make incredible incredible cbd and not only do they make cbd they make many different types of it there's a few different strains that they have um in flour you can buy like a bag of cbd flour so the same way you can buy like nugs this is um flour it does come in a package um box i believe you can buy nondescript um packaging if you're worried about any parents seeing it or anything like that it is legal for anybody over 21 um because it's just a

smoking product but um you can buy the flower for the flower me personally if you're broke okay if maybe bowls get you if you have like a new strain that you got and it maybe gets you a little too anxious what i like to do is in my grinder i'll um uh grind up cbd weed the flower and my regular weed and then i'll do like a half and half bowl okay or maybe top off your bowl with a little bit of weed a it'll save you so much weed okay because cbd gives a lot of the same like calming um properties that i enjoy about weed um and also another great product they have is their pens they make carts um their carts are great if you get too high straight up if i just get like out of my fucking mind high like oh my god too big of a dab too much whatever oh my god i need

to go into a public store right now one little rip off the cart i'm good i'm set you know what i mean also if you need to be non-discreet that's also the best way when i they sent me a battery with mine i'm not sure if they'll send you a battery with um yours but i believe they they should so you should be good to go once you order it incredible their packaging is so fucking cute um if you want a nice little christmas gift for your friends something easy to hand out to people something that's like really cute vibey you want to try cbd you want to put cbd on to people um they make um little pre-roll packs okay they have different pre-roll packs for like different times of the day you want to smoke whether it's at night time you want to get a little sleepy you

want to chill out daytime you need to be stimulated but not overwhelmed um midday for just general running around um they make like a five pack of fatty fatty pre-rolls okay comes with matches inside and a striking match like for lighting the matches on the side so cute oh my god the cutest little thing ever perfect for gifts perfect for if you just need to pocket something take it around with you love it but i love past packs um they have been so helpful for me and for a lot of people straight up if you green out you're getting way too high you need to calm down cbd is such a lifesaver okay maybe you don't want to smoke in the morning and you have a habit of smoking a ton in the morning you need to lower your tolerance cbd is very low thc i believe it's like under one

percent or like maybe not i need to look at the percentages anyways it's it's very low it's not psychoactive um i'm not super psychoactive so if you want to take a little tolerance break want to save yourself your like a little bit of time in the day i love smoking cbd in the morning and afternoon and saving my nights for weed um that's a great way to help build your tolerance back up take a little break from weed now you are still smoking um a product of that you're just smoking something so you are still going to get some effect but it's really just an overwhelming like calming sense feeling you feel very relaxed it's very much so those properties that you get from smoking weed minus the anxiety the paranoia all that stuff so maybe if you even don't like smoking

weed because of those things give cbd a shot first or maybe mix some cbd in with it or have some on hand if things go wrong at paz paz packs i love them you can use code smoke sash for 10 off i believe um yeah please give it a shot if you really want i'm obsessed with them if you have any questions feel free to shoot me a dm and i'd be more than happy to answer them um also you can shoot the um company any questions you have they get back to you guys super fast i know that they're incredible love them oh you guys i got the age old question does he really like me or is he just into me for sex oh my god round of applause for this one because every single bitch on this planet has had this shit go through their head whenever they got into a new relationship okay

and we're gonna go through a little breakdown for you um because i don't think you're crazy i think he is oh my god also you guys are out of line somebody commented on my second account on tiktok and was like i love your little giggles they sound like little fairy queefs don't say that shit to me girl what what are you talking about that was so funny it made me giggle though um does he like me or is he just using me for sex the age-old question um now here's the thing to i can't tell you i simply cannot tell you i i don't know i don't know this man this is literally they sent me they sent me one line they didn't give me any context so if you are ever finding yourself in this position this i'm confused i don't know what's happening um i feel like as

women it as for me as a woman I don't want to speak for all women like literally ever but I'm always only ever speaking from like my perspective um as a woman I personally don't want to be used for sex I that's like a fear of mine especially when you think that you're getting yourself into a relationship and I think a lot of women find themselves confused because men are not forward with their emotions and i also think a lot of men are purposefully not forward with their emotions as a sense of like control control on their situation and control on you okay so what you need to do as a grown-ass person i don't care how old you are be a grown-ass person for a second stand up for yourself and literally ask them straight up literally ask them do you want a

relationship do you see a future with me or do you just want this to be a sex uh situation like straight up you have to ask these men these things because they are not forward enough to be able to tell you these things and they should be that is the issue but i need you guys to stand up for yourself and show up for yourself and speak up for yourself okay obviously the men are in the wrong here but you cannot let yourself get played oh well i don't think really either way you're getting played just like make sure you know what's the situation's boundaries are you need to ask them dude what the fuck do you want from this okay and if they give you a wishy-washy answer you say you have two to three business days to get me a final answer um i'll be waiting but i

will not be responding to this because you can't take maybe i don't know as an answer all right you're gonna spend the rest of your life waiting you need to ask them straight up i saw a tiktok the other day and a man was like whoa well would it be better if i just like straight up you know would it be any better if i just told her like my intentions are purely sexual and i'm not interested in a relationship like is that any better like bitch what the fuck did he think that you wanted to be lied to like what men think that like leading people on is okay because they don't want to hurt somebody's feelings okay if a man was like emotionally mature enough to be like hey listen i don't want to hook up or i just want to hook up and i don't see a future with you cool

perfect like that is very mature and that is something that somebody should be able to say um now what you do with that information do with what you will uh if you don't want a purely or sexual relationship then like period do what you need to do if you do want a purely sexual relationship then period do what you need to do i don't care what you do but you need to like not let these men have this like emotional control over you okay okay it's something i'm very passionate about and i get so upset about because these men are just hurting all of these women and it's like every day i see a fucking beautiful mermaid type woman hurt by a sea creature looking man and it breaks my heart every single fucking time so stand up for yourself make

these men answer to you babe make them answer to you bitch do you want a relationship with me or not okay because also i feel like a lot of them are wishy-washy because a lot of women don't want a purely sexual relationship now if you do want a purely sexual relationship period good for you love that do whatever you need to i hope you find the perfect situation but i feel like a lot of women aren't looking for a purely sexual relationship um well for me and uh personally i have to have that like emotional connection that i want to be with this person i want a relationship with this person to be like hooking up with them and so i need a relationship pretty much straight up and i feel like men sometimes don't want that and they just like will lead a

women on so they can have sex and that's not okay so speak up for yourself say what you want make that man answer to you um do with the information what you will but don't take maybe as an answer because a lot of men will say maybe okay men they just will never get better will they like oh my god it makes me so frustrated but there's no like formula there's no like oh well if he you can secretly judge their text this way to see if they like you oh well like there's no there's none of that okay you straight up have to use your words and communicate all right is he giving you what you want is he ready for a relationship are you guys on the same like terms and agreements i don't fucking know but like there's no there's no formula there's no oh well if he does this thing

then he likes you oh well if he does this one thing then he doesn't like you if he behaves like this like you can't analyze people based on their um actions well like you can and you very much should but you can't only base things on their actions the same way you only can't base things on their words okay if they say they're gonna do something and they don't do it that's just a lie if they're behaving one way but not saying it that's also just a lie okay you need like a combination of the two you need them to verbally express how they feel and physically show you how they feel okay i'm not gonna have like some random like girl boss here's 10 tips for if a man likes you no ask that man what the fuck he wants or better yet don't even ask him well like you can

ask him but like if you know what you want and you know like what is best for you and you know what's the best path for you speak the fuck up and say it okay oh my god my voice dropped three octaves speak up and say that bitch okay don't give him the you know power to oh well maybe oh maybe not just be like hey i need this right now whether it's a purely sexual relationship or you want an actual relationship this is what i'm looking for this is what i plan on doing period that's your answer see what they have to say i've also been getting a lot of questions regarding like situationships and toxic friends of like how to cut people off um and i think it brings up a really good conversation because people will be like somebody did this one tiny little thing to me

and now i gotta cut them off because they hurt me and i think like yes the idea of like you know cutting off toxic things that maybe weren't beneficial for you is like good yes but at this point in like society we've kind of gotten to a weird point where it's like people are just getting cut off for no reason okay and it's kind of like a defense mechanism that people are picking up on to just push people away whether they are good for them or bad to protect their ego or to just avoid a situation that they want to avoid okay I do not think those are either very I don't think that's a valid reason for cutting people off and I think you're probably causing way more harm to yourself and those people's emotions than you are to anything else but no if you got some people in

your life that hurt you intentionally you don't see yourself growing with them anymore you guys are going different directions the process of like cutting someone off doesn't need to be crazy and dramatic and like fire and like oh my god like it doesn't need to be that whole situation personally for me I like to avoid as much drama as I can I hate that I hate the feeling of drama I hate the you know it doesn't need to be like a whole dumpster fire sometimes you can just like naturally remove yourself stop talking to them slowly withdraw start focusing on yourself and what you need and what will benefit you and that will naturally happen I don't think there needs to be this drama sometimes you guys can just like very casually float away okay that's

kind of how what it or what it was like with my roommates um back in college I was just like I was like hey can you guys come to the living room I was like this is just not a beneficial beneficial i was like sobbing but i was like this is not a beneficial situation for me i kind of got my college situation fucked up i don't see a future for me here i've been miserable i'm moving out and i left and then like some i i'm still friends with some of them some of them not so much but i think it's okay to just be like hey i need to focus on myself hey i need to grow a little bit without you just naturally you know moving without like cutting fucking ties you know what I mean you do not have to hurt that person to move on for yourself because hurting that person

back simply is not gonna make you feel any sort of better okay also hold on there's a meme and she worded it so well but I think it's a very incredible thing to bring up um oh fuck what is her name i posted on my instagram yesterday um but it's like essentially you need to understand that also when somebody hurts you um sometimes it's not like as calculated and intense and like as directed as it may seem okay um a lot of the times when i get hurt i feel like oh that is a very personal attack sometimes i take things like very personally when in reality was that person intentionally like doing these actions to purposefully hurt me in this way probably not okay straight up sometimes you gotta just like understand that i mean everybody makes mistakes

everybody you know makes the wrong choice changes their mind acts out subconsciously um and sometimes you just have to not take it personally i don't know what your situation is I don't know how much they hurt you but I think that's a very good point to bring up let's talk life path life path life path life path um I get this question a lot a lot I also ask myself this question a lot I feel like a lot of us do what the fuck do I want to do with my life where am I going what am I doing with this um who am I what do I want to do with my life you know like where do I want to be in five years and all of those are like very heavy questions my dad likes to ask me those questions and then i'll just like casually like laugh them off and then go

home and like have a panic attack because it's like oh my god that was just like heavy i did not need to think about that but very valid it is something you do need to think about um on the rational side like yes in life you do have to play the game of life you have to set things up for yourself you have to make sure you are going to be set up to succeed whether on whatever path that may be okay but with the idea that there is like one life path there is one one set direction that you are supposed to go on this earth i think is very toxic because people see that as very limiting okay people see that as like oh there's not a lot of choices here like oh what do i do with that you know when in reality it opens up your choices to so many different things because I think

our true life path is truly whatever makes us happy okay and that sometimes changes because we grow as human beings and that's okay and it's going to change and it's probably going to change a lot and that's okay that's okay it's okay if like the stuff you maybe used to do you don't find passionate anymore it's okay that you've outgrown some of your old stuff all right I hope you do I hope you move on from some things because it means you're growing and changing and hopefully into a better person but to limit yourself to such a narrow state of mind and like assuming that you have to be a perfect human being to be on this one right life path is very toxic okay as long as you are moving and acting with love towards yourself and others and you are

doing what truly makes you happy at that time whatever it is um that is your life path that is you moving on the right direction in life okay it doesn't have to be some like oh horrible like, overwhelming, cloudy, doomful question, you know? Let me hit this. Sometimes, oh my god, sometimes it's pretty simple, okay? Sometimes it's not as deep as you may think, and sometimes it's a very universal answer okay we're special but in reality we're human we all just want to do what makes us feel good what brings us love what brings other people love okay you got to act in accordance to yourself to your true self to what truly makes you happy i think that truly puts us on our life path on our like true life path now i've been in many

situations where like i haven't been moving in accordance to any of those things quite honestly and that's okay that's okay if you feel yourself there that's all right that just means boom your eyes are opened and now you have so much time to look at all of these different possibilities of where you can go okay we don't need this dreadful air okay get it off it's winter this like dread is like overwhelming everybody looks so sad which is like understandable you know what i did oh my my god okay happy lights essentially they're just grow lights okay they're like weed lights but for humans they work so well they work so well so like in my room i have two windows it's a big room it's like a living room attached to a room i only have two windows on either end so it doesn't allow

for a lot of light let alone in like the summertime when i have natural serotonin but like when my serotonin is at its like lowest in the winter yes i get like crazy seasonal depression um i think it's more circumstantial because i'm like inside more i'm not outside as much you know um i well i get no light in my room so what i did i was like online amazon shopping and i was like looking at the happy lights you know the um they make these like um lights to mimic sunlight right okay and it's supposed to make your depression not so bad those bitches were like 50 to 100 i was like are you kidding they're literally just capitalizing off of mental health and like upcharging the shit the shit out of these tiny little like square box

lights bitch fuck that shit you know what i did and i bought three ring lights because i had one and i forgot i had one so i was like okay well i just need like i need more light in general in my room and i don't really have like a lamp or anything like that i do have a ring light though so i was like okay i'll just plug in my ring light and see if it just like brings light to my room that thing worked exactly like those fucking happy lights i was like whoa pause because this ring light was like ten dollars on amazon you can get like a 10 inch ring light for like 10 to 15 dollars very cheap very affordable sit there in three days i bought three more three more and hooks and i have hooked them up to my wall and now when i walk into my room i turn on like all of these

lamps and it adds the most incredible like artificial sunlight like i feel like i'm sitting on a beach in my room it is so nice so nice you just turn um there's usually settings on ring lights and I always turn the setting to the warm light and it literally is the exact same thing that has probably been the most helpful for my depression um especially my seasonal depression at this time um because I just hate the cold and I hate not being able to be outside and it makes me so sad that I'm stuck inside all the time so that has really just brightened my life completely no pun intended but also pun intended anyways oh my god people just submit their like confessions to me you know what if you got a confessional you need to get it off your chest as long as it's not

like illegal you can send it to me because i'm gonna read them on here someone goes my best friend is dating the guy i lost my virginity to and the night of he asked her out that is a messy situation that is a messy situation i don't know the ins and outs maybe it's not maybe you all know when it's mutual but that's crazy that's straight up crazy some of you send me some crazy stuff i was in the fucking thrift store the other day okay i go in the store i spent hours in there i look all over the place i was just like over in the um knick-knack aisle you know just random stuff and there was like a box i was like oh it's gonna be a cute jewelry box i don't know i open it inside of it is one piece of paper folded up like tiny

and i was like okay i'm gonna open it i open the paper i start reading it says like my prayer confessional something like that on the prayer confessional it says like i am oh my god i want to read it to you i need to find you the picture because i it is insane when i posted on my instagram story you guys were like what the fuck who writes this down and willingly like puts it out for other people to see okay so here's here's what it says my prayer request please pray with me now for the following request my late son's best friend ted was always very kind to me and my husband he was 32 and helped us remember our son well while he stayed with us last month ted and i had sex and i feel guilty about it if it doesn't get worse hopefully three mistakes don't

overpower everything else pray for us my husband is 82 and sick so pray he doesn't find out oh my fucking god oh my god oh my god there's so many things going wrong with there first of all the fact that you cheated on your husband second of all apparently the fact that you did it three times third of all why does he remind you of your son and why are you having sex with him oh my god oh my god oh my god that's insane but anyways if you want you don't believe in christianity you don't have a priest to go to girl my dms are open send them to me i would love to read them i that would be so entertaining but like oh my god i can't believe i stumbled upon that that's fucking a crazy in the thrift store in the thrift store this is like some strange weird internet like

okay if you guys know me from tiktok you probably know me because tana mojo um tweeted and was like i will pay somebody ten thousand dollars if they can outsmoke me for a video and me being like a tiny little creator at the time i think i only had like a hundred thousand followers i was like i didn't i cannot smoke tana mojo like what the fuck that is not that cannot be a hard challenge so everybody was up her ass like tana will smoke with you on twitter so i was like i'll make a tiktok video and i made a tiktok video and it got like over a million likes over like three million views like tons of traction and she literally just went silent even Cheech and Chong me and Cheech and Chong became like mutuals because um they were in my comments like I would love to

see this like let's set this shit up and Tana Mongeau just like dead silence oh but she did follow me back so like we're mutuals or whatever so when I see that she like comments with mutuals on tiktok it's like if they comment on your stuff it's like the first thing and sometimes i'll just like check my um video comments and she'll comment on my videos and then like the second comment under it will be like like recently the um someone was like okay tana now that you're here i'll smoke hannah contest like people keep bringing it up people are like girl i want to see this tana mojo replied though she was like i just think i would rather save the um ten thousand dollars for something better because you probably would win i was like girl yeah but i want the experience i

don't really care about the money i think it'd just be like personally for me i could die happy if i could outsmoke that bitch like let's fucking go like girl you got a podcast i got a podcast let's get together let me outsmoke you also let me steal your money from you essentially because it's a guarantee i'll win and also need to pay off student debt but it's so funny because everybody's like girl come on pull it together she just dead silent dead ass silent she was like scared she was running anyways okay this might be our last question for the day i know a little short but tuesday's was a little long and i have to go run like so many errands and like under the span of 30 minutes so let's get into it this is like a great question to end on as well um

but someone asked me if you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice what would it be and great question i think that's a perfect question i i think i do this and have started this podcast as like a sense of i have really wanted to reach out to my younger selves and if I could reach out to my younger selves and tell myself the things that I'm telling on this podcast I would and I really wish I could because I would have saved myself so much trouble and heartache and pain although that is what made me who I am today but I I have always felt this like urge and this drive and this need to like want to reach out to my younger selves and heal them and I feel bad and so this podcast has been very cathartic in a

way because it's really just been me trying to talk to my younger selves and in turn me openly and honestly wanting to speak to myself has reached so many of you guys and has made you guys want to do better and be better and that's more than I ever could have asked for so thank you and thank you for listening to me and hearing me and being open to have these conversations i i love it um i could not have asked for like a better job quite honestly but if i could go back in time and look little hannah in the eyes and tell her one thing it would be you are gonna be okay okay no matter how deep how dark that hole is no matter how much you're drowning no matter how much your heart aches no matter how much pain you are in you will be okay

you will come out on top you will come out unscathed actually a little scathed but that's okay because you're gonna be better for it and you're gonna grow and you're gonna do better and you're gonna do incredible amazing things you are gonna be okay all right because I spent so much of my life especially so much of my childhood like a time of like when I'm supposed to have fun and it's supposed to be innocent and I'm supposed to look forward to the future dreading it and feeling like there was no other option but to escape and that every action that I made was not the right move and that things weren't going to be okay quite honestly when in reality if I just trusted in myself and listened to myself which is hard to do at a young age I understand

but truly just opened myself up to being myself i would see that if i truly trusted in myself things are gonna be okay at the end of the day i am always gonna be okay because i have me i have me all right you have you and that is quite honestly all you need well as much as you need like a community and that's very important the end of the day what you really need is a good relationship with yourself and you will be okay all right I love you all so much I am so happy to have you here if you are not feeling okay if you are not feeling like you are in a great place the bravest thing you can really ever do is ask for help okay no matter what source that comes through I need you to be brave for me and ask for help and and pick yourself back up and do those

things for yourself and show up for yourself and speak up for yourself and be there for your younger self okay do the same thing i'm doing okay if i can do it you can do it we're gonna be okay i guarantee it i love you all so much thank you for showing up i will see you guys next tuesday i'm gonna post a questionnaire as i always do on my instagram at hannah marlene on monday so if you guys have any questions that are on your mind late night you have something popping up into your mind go ahead and shoot me a dm or on monday i'm gonna press that uh post that questionnaire and you can send it there thank you guys so much for showing up happy friday have a wonderful weekend i'm gonna be posting some journal um uh like journal entries journal ideas on my instagram

as well because i've really been enjoying journaling and i like to spend my weekends planning and preparing myself for the next week which i think is very helpful so if you like those practices as well come join me there but if not have a happy a healthy a incredible weekend and i will see you on tuesday