Smoke Sesh - getting emotional, saturn return & flirting with life

Episode Date: June 23, 2026

hello hotties and welcome back! we have a fulllllll episode today as we talk what ive been up to, chaos in the air, spirituality, anxiety, lowering anxiety, calming nervous system, taking the leap, hiring a psychic, self care ideas, saturn return, facing struggle, fathers day, mommy issues, family trauma, cancer season, high emotions, getting emotional, sadness, anger, emotional regulation, hometown blues, leaning into nostalgia, social media, surveillance state, letting go, blocking and moving on, frienships, fomo, flirting with life, universal tests, universe testing you, facing aversion, body modifications, love island, playing the love game, singleness, celibacy, relationships, waiting for a partner, having standards, doing it all, saying yes, going forward and much much muchhhhh more!watch the vlogs on YouTube at hannahmarlene444join the patreon! new episodes (and more) at patreon.com/smokeseshshawtysubmit your questions and call ins every week on instagram.com/hannahmarlene

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash, so come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life. The good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing, I've got a story for it all. Hello, hello hotties, and welcome back to another episode of Smoke Sash. my name is hannah your host i don't know i'm in a weird mood today you guys there is a lot of energy in the air and baby i am just trying to hold on the best i can i hope you guys have been

doing well i've been doing i've been doing you know i've been doing good let's be real i've been doing good but something is coming for me something big in the form of this mercury retrograde and it's like being chased down a hallway by a serial killer anyways this morning i woke up and i supposed to have horseback riding lessons but I just did not sleep at all last night I don't know what's going on well I do know what's going on there's just some crazy astrology placements going on right now it's the stars are going wild and I've been having like the most horrible dreams ever nothing like actually terrifying or like jaw-dropping just like odd and weird and a little too close to home where you're like okay maybe reality and dreams do blend a little bit maybe

there is a lesson here that I can take um that along with father's day which I actually ended up spending with my mother um I was just fucking beat and tired and my alarm went off at 7 30 this morning to go do my writing lessons and I was like hey girl I'm not feeling good and I think I need an extra five hours of sleep so like I'll catch you I'll catch you around soon like we'll just reschedule for another time this week it's no big deal but I slept probably like 12 hours fully I feel fully rested I feel fully relaxed but oh baby this retrograde coming up you guys I'm spooked and I am scared already it's been a bit of a challenge and it's a challenge where it's like you're at the top of a high dive and someone's taken the ladder away from you

and you know that below you there's like safe soft water you're not gonna get hurt all you have to do is jump but the fear of falling the fear of taking that jump the fear of just like moving your body forward is what garners so much anxiety and terror in your body even though the situation itself is safe and harmless you're only like six feet up babe like just jump into the water it's not that big of a deal but the overthinking and the contemplating and the ah is just like that's kind of where i am that's where i am and i wish i gave you more details but baby i don't even know the details i don't even know the details all i know is my anxiety has been on 10 recently so i am trying this week my goal is to engage in activities that I know bring me peace joy love

happiness rest relaxation all right step number one for me personally as a way to ease my anxiety is to get my physical space in order when I feel like my physical space is out of control I feel like my internal space is also out of control even if my internal space is like chaos as long as everything else around me is like somewhat clean somewhat neat I'm usually like okay I can focus on one thing I can handle that thing but if it's more than that I just I start losing my fucking mind I start losing my mind so today I'm gonna just do like a really nice deep clean and refresh I'm gonna light some white candles in my house I'm gonna leave my front door open let in some new air new energy I'm gonna set some bowls of salt out cleanse cleanse protect protect speaking

of like woo-woo spiritual things i've been asked you guys have been asking for like way more spiritual content and like spell work and how i work with the universe and things like that if that's what you're into i i love it i'm happy to share that side of myself with you the youtube video this past week was actually me working on a money bowl and refreshing my money bowl so if you guys want to make one with me if you want to hear me talk about spirituality how it connects to me how i manifest money manifestation and just abundance outlook um that is up on youtube right now hannah marlene 444 that was really fun and grounding something i really needed i did that over the uh summer solstice which by the way happy solstice my loves it is officially

summer it is hot it is hot out okay get outside get some sun on your face enjoy the weather maybe make an offering to the universe go take some flowers some fresh fruit down to the river give that back to her burn some bay leaves with some affirmations with some wishes on it you know just get into the whimsy of life get into the the excitement of it all and just like try and have fun despite it all all right another way that i like to ease my anxieties is with an abundance of self care um when i am feeling the worst i take the best care of myself when i'm feeling good i'm like i don't care i'm gonna walk around in sweatpants no makeup hair and a claw clip like i could care less but when i'm already feeling bad internally and maybe this is shallow me i don't give a fuck

this is just what helps when i'm feeling like stressed or anxious internally i need to take more care of myself externally so then the external doesn't weigh so much on the internal so there's this like rule i was talking to a southern woman the other day and she's like there's this um three-part rule when it comes to your looks and appearances which is there's three different things that go to your appearance your clothes your makeup your hair all right closed face hair when you leave the house two of those fucking things better be done when I heard that I was like oh I don't always have the energy for that but like I said when I'm feeling bad down bad about myself I need to look good to me I don't care about how other people perceive me at least

to myself so then the external doesn't weigh so much on the internal so I have really been working on okay let's at least like maybe go do our hair i love doing my hair i love having fun hairdos let's just go straighten your hair do your bangs easy peasy throw in a cute little summer sundress already feeling good who cares if i have a bare face at that point in time because two of the three are done all right so the external and also like the self-care of it all i'm about to go on like a little lush shopping spree i have been needing more lush products i swear by lush lush makes the shower experience feel like an a like self-love ritual spell whatever they do with their products is like so fantastic so beautiful and my skin has never been

better so she's an acne girly who like breaks out all the time i need real moisturizers i need moisturizers that aren't gonna make me break out i need shower gels that aren't gonna make me break out i need hair care products that aren't gonna make my hair so greasy and my forehead break out You know what? I mean and their stuff always lives up to the hype always is so fantastic for my skin all natural You know and also the morals of the brand i'm like, yes, I will give you my money So i'm gonna do a little like a shopping spree here soon. Go get me a little Massage bar shower gel sugar scrub all the above all of the above I get my nails done next week So that'll be a nice little cherry on top. I also think when you're feeling

Um anxiety or maybe down about yourself changing your appearance is also a good way to go but with mercury retrograde coming up like be careful of the the hair changes be careful of like any impulsive changes but for me whenever there's like a retrograde I always end up getting some sort of new tattoo or piercing and it always goes so well for me so I've been really looking into getting like a new tattoo you guys are like oh my god she's she's crashing out she's spiraling she's changing up her look she's getting a new tattoo she's indulging in the self-care too much yeah girl yeah girl i would be journaling but it's like what do i even journal about i don't know where this anxiety is coming from i just know it's coming at me and it's coming at me quick

and when it does happen i'll journal about it then but for now like we are just one day at a time journaling is great i love journaling i really only journal in times of intense peril peril okay some people are like how do i journal every single day well you can make a habit of it of just waking up and doing like a quick little five sentence journal sash or end of the day five things you're grateful for that's a great way to daily journal but for me personally maybe i'm only breaking out the journal when i am going through something terrible horrible no good scary like the thoughts are too big in my head i also like to schedule a psychic i love scheduling a psychic any sort of psychic that you enjoy that you feel called to listen to your intuition um i personally got

ate up by the psychic there's a psychic that i've been following um astrologer psychic all the above on tiktok for a while now and she did like a little like flash sale ten dollar one card polls like completely anonymous you can type in whatever information you want in like the delivery box but it's like i'm just gonna pull a card and intuitively read you to filth and boy did she boy did she read me boy did she read me should i read it here on the podcast you know what why not maybe it'll give you a little hint on why my anxiety so high bitch this shit i was like i was like deep breathing when i got this delivered i was like oh my god her website is crystal ho h-e-a-u-x.com if you want to support you probably should she's fabulous but

first sentence strong straight out the gate your main issue is that you need a new place to live yeah babe working on it working on it your environment is not a match to the energy you want in your life you need to change environments aka where you lay your head okay you've so much potential in your career life that has been untapped due to you spending years in survival mode right now you need to make the decision to forever be stagnant or to make the jump and move alone logistically this misplacement is a result of what you experienced in your childhood you had people raising you that felt that you belonged elsewhere, somewhere better. They didn't feel adequate. You observing this behavior has led you to leading a life where you are always evaluating

your adequacy. Two in five Canadians will hear the words, you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. This episode is brought to you by Accenture. When your advertising operations fall out of sync, everything else follows. Spotify and Accenture are working together to reinvent the rhythm of ad sales using automation, analytics, and smarter workflows to simplify campaign delivery and access better data across the

business. The result? Less time spent on operations, more time connecting brands with the moments and fandoms that matter most. Learn more at Accenture.com slash Spotify. Clocked me. Clocked me. Yeah, babe. Yeah, babe. Those are the major themes that I'm going through right now 27 has hit me like a fucking train let's talk about Saturn returns real quick okay I you know going through my mid-20s I would hear all these older women talk Saturn returns Saturn return like watch out just be aware take on the challenges accordingly but just like be prepared and I was always like Saturn return okay yeah like what you're gonna go through a little bit of hardships like is not life a bunch of hardships like whatever and then I turned 27

and my Saturn return had been returning but I officially had entered into the age of my Saturn return gulp yeah bitch they were not lying they were not lying it was like I am in Alice in Wonderland and there's a white rabbit running around with a clock and it's like what are we counting down for what are we counting down for what do I need to be prepared for I don't even know what it is but all I know is like a life-changing series of events is about to occur in my life and i am just really hoping that that seat belt works on that roller coaster you know i really am just hoping it does they are not kidding when they say your life flips upside down now the thing is it flips upside down in a real raw good honest way the thing about getting older and

growing up and kind of entering your late 20s is you realize damn either a i made mistakes b i've not been living the way i want to c i want to change things up d i'm i'm in cycles that i need to break and you're faced with this challenge which is a saturn return if you choose to take you know this assignment mr 007 yourself um is to face these head on and to go towards your dreams what you need to do and to handle these challenges as well as you possibly can but if you decide to face them and handle these challenges and go through them and go through the hardship and fucking grind and work hard and face them you will come out on the other side so much more yourself than you ever have been in your entire life you will be blessed you will be abundant

incredible amazing opportunities will present themselves but you have to be brave enough to go you know what let me gear up for battle i don't i'm about to face like 1v50 with no sword but like i really hope this armor is good enough you know what i mean baby i turned 27 two weeks ago two weeks ago i turned 27 yeah and i'm already like oh okay like i said what's coming for me what is down this rabbit hole i'm a little scared but i do know ultimately at the end of the day i have to keep telling myself like change is good change is helpful change is beneficial but i need to be brave enough to go forward after change myself instead of just letting life drag me by the hair okay you cannot be complicit in your life to the point where you're not living it you do need

to be like in control in charge of your life and not living it for other people not letting other people live your life not letting other people take advantage of you not letting other people control you to the sense of you know forcing you to be someone that you're not um and it is just hard and challenging and i'm excited to take you guys on the journey with me but that's kind of like where my anxiety has been stemming from most recently if you're also feeling this in the air it's because we have a mercury retrograde coming up we also had chiron um change signs for the first time in seven years into taurus so there's a lot of like big astrological shifts and changes if you believe in astrology love it if you don't cool just like hang on for a couple more minutes

we'll get into the questions here shortly but it is a lot of energetic shifts and changes that are tying us back to think about where you were October 2025 so last October what you were feeling what you were going through the energy shifts that were happening the troubles that you were facing you are probably still facing them to this day and this retrograde is going to force us through kind of a lot of changes that maybe we are not brave enough to take ourselves a lot of shifts that we are not brave enough to take ourselves it's going to remove things from our life it's also going to add things to our life it's going to make us focus more on our personal relationships our relationship to self to friends to you know growing friendships to relationships to

family to everything to your morals to what you're looking forward in the future so a lot of us are really honing in and asking ourselves like what life do we want to build for ourselves who do we want to include in it and you know how do we want to build a life that is like going to give us the most longevity possible and the most happiness possible um and the mercury retrograde is coming in swiftly to make sure that you are on the right path so whatever cycles you've been continuing since october 2025 look at those ask yourself like what have i been struggling with since then what if i had not been brave enough to remove from my life baby those are the things you'll be facing retrograde doesn't actually begin until um the 29th so you have some time but this pre

retrograde shadow phase how intense that has been is making me a little nervous for just how intense retrograde is actually going to be when it finally happens oh you guys oh another thing that i do for my anxiety is getting outside i my two goals this week are to uh go horseback riding my goal my main goal this week is i want to make a horseback riding vlog for you guys it's just i haven't been able to get on the trails in a while because it's been so rainy and wet and muddy um so my main goal is to make a horseback riding vlog for you guys or just like come to the farm the barn with me vlog and then also i need to get to the pool this week i don't care where it is i don't care how it is I'm manifesting a good hot summer pool day and that's all I could really ask for if I'm

being honest simple chill calm self-reflecting self-abundance prosperity of self self-love that's the themes that I'm really diving into anyways love you guys so much if you're also feeling the anxiety of the pre-retrograde phase indulge in the things and the habits that I just told you about what I am doing to kind of self-soothe and cope hopefully it helps you because it does help me it really does help me all right with that being said let's get into some of your guys's questions father's day relationship with your dad specifically i love my dad um i'm sure a lot of men look at me and they go daddy issues no baby i am the epitome of mommy issues i am the epitome of mommy issues okay love my mom down like i said father's day

was actually spent with my mother because my dad he is so me i am i am i am my mom physically but my dad spiritually okay my mom spiritually when it comes like hard work and being like a boss ass bitch but like my desire to run free and to go after everything I want and the fearlessness and all of that my bravery my compassion my generosity my connection to people all of that comes from my dad he we are the same exact human being that's my twin for real my brother on the other hand that is my mom in my dad's body does that make sense so I he took off for father's day and he was on like a cross-country motorcycle trip just like going and swimming in random rivers in Arkansas and just camping off the back of his motorcycle yeah like I said that is me as fuck anyways so

he was off doing his thing and told him a little happy father's day very chill he kind of just goes and does whatever he wants and I really fuck with that energy but my mom was here alone so she's like I want to go meet your horse I've never met your horse before like she isn't really she grew up around horses my like great uncle raised polo horses rich rich as fuck yeah i'm not getting any of that money or even a horse from him but like she grew up around those kind of horses so she was like i haven't seen a horse in a long time i want to go meet your horse zina let's like go out to the bar let's go to the farm like okay cool like sure let's go do it you can't really like ride her because you bitch you gotta sign a waiver and also she will take off with you so like i'm

not gonna I'm gonna keep an eye on you but like we can go out we can brush her you can get some air some country air on your skin whatever the fuck and so oh my god love her down love her down love her down she doesn't listen to this podcast but like oh we just like we butt heads like no other and I know it's because like no offense to her I know it's because she's like damn I wish my daughter was different and it's like oh I feel that every single interaction we have I feel in every single little interaction we have like even just like showing her my horse showing her on the farm she's like oh country this like I don't agree with that I'm like yeah no shit but like we're in the middle of nowhere Missouri like I don't know it was like so it just definitely did not help my

anxiety that's for freaking sure um but it was really good because I talked to my friend who all of my friends live out of town and one of my friends specifically which love her down she's so sweet one of my longtime friends she was like moving away was the best thing I could have possibly done because you don't realize how codependent you are on your parents until you have space from them and it's really nice to honestly have space from them and I was like oh I didn't realize how much I do actually need that I do need that for my own mental health like I do need some distance some space some some area for me to grow and create my own life on my own love her down like I said but it was definitely like a I was like regressing into my 16 year old

self by the end of the trip by the end of like the four hours we spent out there I did get her up on her on the horse and walked her around for a little bit but like I said Xena was gonna take off with her I was like we're not doing this we are not doing this and I she got to pet the barn kitties she got to just like hang out i gave xena a good bath she tangled her hair it was a good little like self-care spa day for my girl but also it was like a good internal day for me because i realized i had taken my dad to the barn and then i was taking my mom to the barn and i realized how much more fun i had taking my dad to the barn even though he's a man of little words than my mom and that was kind of like oh damn oh damn oh damn i wish i could have that relationship

with my mom but it's just like we are just like two very very completely opposite different people does that mean we like don't get along no we get along we have good conversations but it does like trigger this weird internal wound of like this um people pleasing and people seeking that i've really been trying to work on where bitch like the fucking like the fucking psychic said it is like actually so crazy you observing this behavior has led you to leading a life where you are always evaluating your adequacy bitch i was out there at the bar and it's like this is my spot this is my place like i i know this place like the back of my hand i know exactly what to do but the whole entire time i was there i was like second guessing myself like oh my god am i doing this right am i

doing this right is she thinking about this is she is she judging me on this and it's not that she was putting that on me but it was me definitely putting that on myself and that is just like oof I'm really trying to work on that behavior so I had a father's day I definitely had one but it wasn't with my father this is my mother instead and it it was good in the sense of it it made me come to conclusions and realizations of things that I hadn't thought about in a while but I knew were to be true and then it just like kind of confirmed that in my brain so I don't know if you guys struggle with your relationships with your fathers or mothers whatever it is i feel like we're always gonna have like ups and downs with our parents and so i do try and stay as

patient as possible but um yeah it really was just like i need to escape the nest i need to i am a baby bird that's been here for how many years baby it's time to spread your wings and fly and soar and soar away like i said i really am blessed to have a wonderful relationship with my father um my relationship with my father is so good because he did not put he put expectations on to me in the sense of like you need to listen to what you want to do and follow that i don't give a fuck what it is but when you set your sights on something you need to see it through and if you get to the point where you're like okay fuck it you don't want to do it that's okay we're here for you but like you need to be strong enough to make those internal decisions for

yourself and I do really appreciate that about him he also taught me how to be not so fearful of life and excited by life and adventurous and a thrill seeker in a sort of sense and to have like that really bright fire and excitement for life within me so I am like so incredibly thankful to have him oh my god like I'm gonna start crying I was so thankful to have him in my life and if you don't have a good relationship with your father bitch I'll be your daddy like I'll be your daddy i'll i'll share that with you from the lessons that i got from him but when i think to like the support i get in life from family i get this like undeniable support from him and like my grandmother that i don't get anywhere else and to have those people in your life that are just like

so just like let you be yourself and love you nonetheless those are people oh my god i keep crying like i said i'm going through a lot those are people that you really should not take for granted no matter how fucking crazy they are wild the people who see you for who you are and and love you nonetheless and just like want to see you follow your dreams no matter what they look like those are people that are so incredibly special and people who you should really lean on and reach out to and love and support my grandmother my no wonder my dad is the way he is because my grandmother is so this person she sure she has like some old-timey values not in that way just like she's like when are you getting married when are you having kids you know

as all grandmothers are but at the end of the day every single time I talk to her she is just like as long as you are with somebody who makes every day exciting for you who knows you who loves you and as long as you are also doing that for yourself nothing else matters and it's like such a refreshing environment to be around because sometimes around my mom and her family and it's like um very rigid or contractual or what are you doing in your life what are your top what are your top five accolades that you've accomplished in the past month otherwise we don't give a fuck we don't care about your hobbies we don't care about what you're doing like where are you going to school what is your job who are you marrying what does your money look like and it's like god that

that transactional kind of relationship is just so fucking draining sometimes to have like real people in your life that do care and love you for for only who you are it is just so nice to have it so nice to be around whether that's your mother or your father or your grandmother or a friend or a co-worker I don't care who it is those people are special and those are people who you should leave it on especially in times of like anxiety or conflict or hardships those people will be there for you no matter what um and i am just so thankful to kind of uh realize that and be able to reflect on that and appreciate that especially this father's day even if i wasn't able to spend it with my father i'll see him again soon i'm really not too worried that man's gonna live

fucking forever that man is the most healthiest person i've ever met my entire life it's actually fucking insane it also makes me want to like work harder and take better care of my body which is nice he's like a fucking bodybuilder i'm like dude uh not me crying on the podcast i haven't cried in the podcast in a long time it's gonna be i think i'm gonna be crying on the podcast a lot coming up soon so just like stay tuned for that but i hope you guys had a good father's day like i said if you don't have a father figure to lean on if um you know your father's having a heavenly father's day whatever it is there are life lessons and something that you can take from it that is a teachable moment good or bad and people come into our lives to you know give you teachable

moments so take those lessons for what they are whether it's like i'm not gonna fucking deal with a piece of shit like this ever in my life or if it's like wow what a wonderful person i'm only going to go forward towards wonderful people either way take those lessons at face value for what they are and just go forth to live a life that is good for you and amazing for you and supports truly who you are what energy are you embracing slash tapping into this cancer season girl I'm crying it out I'm not even kidding baby I'm crying it out every cancer season either has a habit of turning me into like a lover girl or it has me turning into like an emotional girl and I haven't been an emotional girl in a while I've kind of been if I'm being

honest I've been kind of closed off and reserved for a long time in a way that I really am not happy about um in a way where it's like I'm closed off and reserved in a to protect my own energy and to kind of like consolidate it because I'm having to like put it in so many different places and this cancer season I think I'm going to challenge myself to just feel it feel it all to feel it out to feel it all to the good the bad the ugly like it can all be so overwhelming but also it can all be so transformational and emotions are teachers of course emotions are fleeting they come they go they're here they're there i'm crying then i'm like giggling laughing like psychotic right but also like i don't ever want you guys to be closed off to your emotions and when you're a

sensitive individual it's very easy to like want to close yourself off from them but really they have something to tell you and something to show you about whatever you may be going through or whatever you may be thinking or whatever environment you may be going through if you're having intense negative reactions to something it's probably because it's a negative situation don't shut those emotions off feel them understand them know why they are occurring and make a change accordingly if you're feeling intense positive interactions about something that like you never felt before you're like wait i forgot i love painting oh my god i'm having so much fun i forgot how much this is just like so enjoyable lean into that emotion understand that it's

happening for a reason feel it maybe you're feeling sad about something you're just a fleeting moment or you're looking back on something or you just need to cry it out let it out okay emotions are not something that we should be holding on to so tightly and so rigidly they are something that we should feel in that moment and let pass very quickly and so my challenge to myself this cancer season is feeling appreciating for whatever moment it might be and then moving forward onto the next that is my big cancer goal I also want to do a little more work with water I want to be around water a little bit more than I have been I'm very called by water I love working with water I love being in water I don't know why that is I don't have many Pisces placements or water sign placements

at all but there's something about being around it that is so like it's giving mother like when I'm around water I'm like okay yes this is mother earth I'm being enveloped by mother earth right now and so i'm gonna try and be around more water than i have been that seems very vague but i like to set vague goals they're easy to achieve i want to get in a pool i want to go to the river i want to go to the lake i want to go fucking i want to go shake my ass on a yacht in italy like i don't care what it is i just want to be in water near water around water um so that is one of my goals i also am like okay cancer moment i am such a lover girl and i really will just like give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give and give but like to other people it's

it's the people pleasing in me where it's like i feel good when other people feel good by what i'm doing for them but also it's like i don't feel good by what i'm doing for myself and that's a problem so i need to start doing things that make me feel good i need to be a lover girl but for myself does that make sense i need to be like unabashedly running towards myself throwing love at myself giving myself everything i want and desire of course with limitations duh hello but like showing that love that i'm so willing and eager to give to other people but to myself unabashedly that's another thing that i really want to work on self-love even like um i want to get into some glamour magic i want to go make some offerings at the river like i really am

getting back on my spiritual woo woo bullshit and that's because i'm getting closer and deeper into myself, but I do need to share the love that I'm so eager to share with other people with myself this season. Two in five Canadians will hear the words, you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer.

Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. Get your tickets now for the Dog Stars. It's no surprise how fast civilization can disappear. Go! A therapist. Kill or be killed. Jacob Elordi. There are people out there.

They need our help. Josh Brolin. Shoot first. you can inquire afterwards margaret quali okay tough guy and guy pierce arm up the dog stars directed by ridley scott in theaters friday get tickets now hi hannah i just wanted to say i love you and i love the podcast and all your words of wisdom that you have to offer and my question's a little confusing but it basically is what are your thoughts about anger and mainly in the perspective of women and their emotions because I feel like

sometimes obviously there's this whole anger iceberg and everything how anger isn't like the primary emotion for anything but I feel like it's sometimes kind of hard because with women our anger is judged behind so many different things like oh she's hormonal oh she's too emotional oh stuff like that and I've been getting really frustrated because I have a lot of passion and anger within me sometimes about stuff and I'm quick to anger and it's just something I struggle with and I don't know how to embrace it and I don't really know how to differentiate what's going on with my emotions per se um but yeah I just wanted to hear your opinions on that I hope I made sense but love you oh I love you I'm sorry you're struggling with um anger anger is not a fun

thing to struggle with but also it's like it's another one of those valid emotions is like being sad being upset being disappointed I am I just am naturally not somebody who is quick to anger and I think that has to do a lot with my upbringing I was not around angry people often i did not experience any anger um from my parents towards each other towards me of course like tits and tats here i've experienced a lot of passive aggressiveness but not like anger and so that is not inherently an emotion that i reach towards i do think um and this is just like me psychoanalyzing things this has maybe no truth to it but just an observation that i've held within my life which is a lot of the emotions as adults that we are quick to lean on whether it's like

you're quick to sadness or you're quick to anger or you're quick to disappointment or you're quick to passive aggressiveness it's sort of like negative emotion that you are quick to is usually something that you inherently saw a lot in your childhood and then it turns into like a default state where it's like this is just what i know and so this is what i lean towards and so people that i've been around who are quick to anger were people who were around angry parents angry people people who fought with each other people who fought it out people who yelled at each other and so that's how they knew to handle conflict that's how they knew to handle their emotions which like of course you know monkey see monkey do it's kind of how we are as human beings how

you are raised does have an effect on how you then go towards the world and um those things are valid what you've been through is valid what you've been taught is valid but also like as an adult we are faced with these opportunities to challenge what we've been taught challenge what we know quote-unquote as truth and to create our own truth to create our own realities and so if you find yourself being like prone to anger or prone to sadness or prone to passive aggressiveness passive aggressiveness is something that i feel myself being prone to um we have the power to recognize those things to understand where they come from and to kind of like do the mental work to work our way out of them but also there's validity in those emotions there's validity

and just like simply put being upset if you get angry by something that is valid but how you confront that situation sometimes can be very unvalid if you confront that situation by um you know yelling screaming throwing things getting violent um being like unnecessarily angry then that's not okay that's not a healthy way to express your emotions and to express your your being if you find yourself even just like something small happening in your life and you immediately lean towards anger it's like why are we doing that why are why are we allowing that self that thing to have so much power over ourself if you find yourself being upset with somebody or a coworker or whatever and you become passive aggressive it's like you shutting yourself down

or being snappy or being snippy at people is not a healthy way to you know confront that issue in your life so it doesn't necessarily have to do with anger like you said you know women we get talked down a lot that our anger isn't valid that our being upset isn't valid that having issues isn't valid and i do think that a lot of people will will say those things to you and take that out on you but how you choose to go about that confrontation is up to you and i do know unfortunately as a woman to be received i do kind of have to have like a like a grip i have to have like a little bit of a grip unfortunately unfortunately now some people deserve to get bitched out and you can unleash that anger okay if they are horrible awful evil people and you

need to cuss someone out real quick go ahead but also there's a there's a level you have to approach when it comes to the people you love or care about where it's like i respect you and i want you to respect me so i have to approach the situation in a respectful manner and men need to be doing that as well i think men get away with a lot of anger that is not okay women we don't get to let get away with a lot of anger we understand that there needs to be respect and communication that if i want to be taken seriously i need to have that respectful tone men think they can run around and talk however the fuck they want that they can yell that they can have pity parties all this fucking bullshit and it's like no if women are expected to be held to the standard talk about

equality men need to be able to do that as well men need to be able to control their emotions understand them and approach areas of conflict with respect period point blank also if you're a woman who find yourself being angry about a lot of things let me just go ahead and say valid real ask yourself where it's stemming from if it's even worth having a conversation or do you need to just go get that energy out do you go get that anger out when i get passive aggressive and it's usually because i've been holding some sort of energy inside me for too long without communicating it without getting it out of myself and so either a i need to have a conversation and get it done or b i need to like literally go on a walk physically exert the energy

go to a rage room if that's what you enjoy go axe throwing go throw smash some glass bottles like whatever it takes for you to feel better go do it but do not hold on to that energy there's anything i can tell you as a woman who is an angry person you know what valid there's a lot to be angry about but you don't have to let the world turn you cold you don't have to let what you know turn you cold get that energy out of yourself exert that energy feel it and release it it's okay to let go of things sometimes okay but you know what you're feeling is valid i'm never going to tell you it's not valid but I think there's something to be said about looking towards why we reach for these emotions so quickly what is that expectation that's put on us how we want to be received in

that situation and also how can we get this energy out of ourselves in a healthy positive manner how to make the most out of being stuck in your hometown right now I have one foot in Kansas City and one foot in LA I do know I'm going to be moving to California do I know when do I know how no absolutely not but I do need to like I need to just like start saying it so then people aren't shocked when it happens and I'm not shocked when it happens um it's gonna be difficult it's gonna be challenging I don't even know how I'm gonna up and move my entire life across the country but I know it needs to happen I know I need to get out of Kansas City I know I need to move and so that's something that I'm working towards and looking towards you know once one step at a time

I'm slowly opening my eyes to it um but while I am here I don't want to hate where I am it's very easy to be like oh I just wish I was in that other place I wish I was there I wish I was here I wish I was not where I am right now and to hate and seethe and loathe where you are but you should never hate any moment of your life you know like of course bad things happen but like if you are in a situation that's ultimately good you're just waiting you're in that limbo period before you take that next step forward you shouldn't take that moment for granted because it might give you some peace and some understanding that you're seeking as an end chapter before you take that next step to really solidify and end that chapter on a good note so the best way to lean into a

place that you've outgrown that you are ready to move on from that you are just like over is you gotta lean into the nostalgia okay you have to lean into the nostalgia Kansas City all right what nostalgia am I fucking leaning into bitch I'm gonna go out I'm gonna be on horseback I'm gonna be in the woods I'm gonna be at the river I'm gonna be lighting off fireworks I'm gonna be going on late night drives listening to music fucking smoking a joint haha just kidding well not kidding but I'm gonna be going to wineries I'm gonna be you know frolicking in a field I'm gonna wear long skirts I'm gonna get a fucking snow cone I'm gonna go hunt down an ice cream truck I'm gonna go cherry picking I'm gonna go strawberry picking I'm gonna go blueberry picking

i'm gonna go all the picking i'm gonna go out to all of the orchards go pick fresh fruit which i haven't done yet which is kind of uh it makes me sad but like i need to go do it whether i do it alone or not i'm gonna go to the events okay fifa is happening in kansas city i was like fuck it i'm gonna go to fan fest i just like randomly showed up it's free literally free showed up it was so nice to see everybody just excited about it celebrating having a good time enjoying themselves it was so cool to see and just connect with like the random events happening in your city i need to go to the club more often okay my favorite club i need to go there more often and dance it out i need to go dance i need to go open up my hips i need to go run around and frolic around this city

like i used to at fucking 16 like i owned this bitch hello why am i not stepping into that energy because like bitch this is my city this is my city i have been in this city since i have been like able to leave my house and catch a ride with whoever would take me here I would escape the suburbs I would come up here I would be up here for weekends crashing at my brother's place just running around this city like I own this bitch and I don't know why I haven't been doing that recently I don't know why I haven't been feeling called to do that because it's like I know this place better than I know anything else so why am I not out enjoying it and fulfilling that kind of bad bitch knowledge that I do have you know what I mean so I'm really leaning into

the nostalgia of it all the appreciation of it all so that when I do move forward accordingly I don't have any like regrets or oh I wish I ate there one last time or I wish I went and did this or I wish or I wish I don't like having I wish moments in life I really am now trying to live my life accordingly so I don't have those things so I don't have regrets so I don't have like missed opportunities and that means bitch unfortunately going out and living your life to the fullest to the max indulge in nostalgia nostalgia is good nostalgia is a driver nostalgia will also hold you back but if you indulge in it as a way to seek joy i think it's a fantastic way to appreciate life and enjoy life that does not mean go back to your ex bitch that's not nostalgia

that's self-loathing okay we'll get into that in a second but like i said retrograde's coming up it's about to test you the fuck out okay those exes coming back those exes you're randomly running into those random men hitting you up baby now is not the time the universe is like we're gonna tempt you by dangling a carrot in front of your face will you bite the carrot or not don't bite that carrot speaking of exes my ex-boyfriend followed his ex-girlfriend on insta after we broke up and thinks i shouldn't be upset okay well i do have some questions here why are you keeping up with your ex why are you checking your ex's followers why are you surveillance stating him and why are you even interacting with him in the first place listen i love social media i think

social media is so good but there's the lost art of ghosting people that we unfortunately feel like not diving into anymore because we have so much access to other people and access to other people is not a good thing i really don't think it's a good thing it is actually might be your downfall it really will remember like back in the day where it's like bitch no phones phone book landline with a wire attached to it into the wall like if you broke up with somebody you there was a high possibility you never saw them again never saw them again how beautiful how wonderful how amazing you say we're done bam they're gone they're gone out of your life but now with social media technically you can still live that but you choose not to because you choose to visit their page

stalk their page who are they following what likes do they have what are they posting blah blah blah blah blah that is not good not good with the rise of social media and also the rises of like surveillance they really are turning us into the gustapo but for each other and that is not good every time I see a video where it's like someone recording someone in public without them knowing I'm like this is not good this is bad whenever I see a video like an altercation in public or like someone's deep dark scary story that like just doesn't need to be shared or like horrible awful things online it's like that is making us turn in on each other surveillance state each other want to like control and manipulate each other and that is not good that is not healthy

that is probably the most the biggest downfall of social media people being like codependent in each other's lives through social media that is really really really unhealthy and although it's so easy to access sometimes the easiest thing is not the best thing for you it isn't you checking that man's following is not good you checking who he's engaging with is not good he is an ex for a reason and the best way to let go of an ex is to let go of them permanently sayonara adios bitch bye-bye like they gotta go and you have to detach if you do not detach they still have their grips their holder their claws in you and you cannot allow them to have that power over you that's ultimately what it is at the end of the day you are allowing them to hold this power over you to

hold this manipulation over you maybe they are doing it intentionally maybe they aren't doing it intentionally either way it's making you feel shitty about yourself when you could just be la la la la la land gallivanting around the city like bitch they don't fucking exist but you choose to engage in these tactics engage in this hyper surveillance of these people which makes you feel bad about yourself because you're still interacting with somebody and so giving power to somebody who does not give a fuck about you please you gotta stand up boundaries are so important when it comes to social media boundaries are so incredibly important when it comes to social media all right if you are dating a man where you have to check his following where you

have to check what he's doing online that just isn't a trustworthy person in general and that's not a person that you need to have in your life period point blank if they're doing shady things on social media cool it's if you observe it one time move on not somebody that you need to have in your life not somebody that's trustworthy to have in your life you see what i'm saying but you hyper surveilling people online whether it's celebrities micro influencers friends family exes all of that hyper surveillance state that you're putting into other people is a massive waste of time it's crashing your fucking dopamine it's hurting your self-worth and it's a it's just wasting your fucking time it's wasting your time here on this precious earth that you should be

running around popping your pussy at the club enjoying your life eating an ice cream cone making new friends there's other more beneficial things you could be doing with your life and the best thing you can do for yourself especially if you find yourself doing this is you have to set harsh boundaries with yourself if you know wow i really do often go and check my ex's profile block that bitch so it's difficult to even check their profile block them on everything delete all the fucking photos if you're like damn i'm turning into a reddit snark aka the gustapo delete that fucking app you know stop watching the videos about that person like it's not a healthy place to live in a lot of people live in it and a lot of people are not free because of it a lot of people

are not living their own lives because of it and i need you to be a free running horse in a field baby girl i need you to be galloping throughout those fields but right now you refuse to come out of the stall baby the gates are open run run i'm begging you i really am if you're arguing with over a man about his behavior on social media that man's a slut and a whore and not somebody you need to be around and i love slut and whores i'm just saying i'm just saying take it from me your time here is so precious you'll meet the right person but it won't be something that you have to argue or fight or or fiend after the right person will be easy swift like a cool breeze very chill relaxed calming nervous system literally not on 10 i promise you that learning to be okay

with no friends fomo is real okay can i be honest with you guys i have no friends as well you guys are probably the closest friends that i have i'm not kidding and that sounds super parasocial but like baby i'm not lying there's a reason i love doing this every single month every single week twice a week for the patreon members like literally i love it i live for it i mean i have good friends you hear me talk about my friends but i will say none of them live here like unfortunately none of them live here and that breaks my heart because they are people that i just like love having around me and i love being around them but they just like are not here and so they all kind of moved moved on with their life and I kind of just like stayed here and

stayed put and didn't make any movement in my life um I kind of just like put all of my eggs in one basket with my partner because that was taking up enough of my energy and time that I did not feel inclined to like put myself out there make new friends and so my big challenge with the rest of the summer and fall is to make connections and make friends um to be vulnerable in that way sometimes I'm a little afraid of being vulnerable to just like fuck it I'll go hang out with this bitch I don't care like let's go do something I want to go have fun I want to go enjoy life and that means being vulnerable and putting yourself out there and hitting up people and like I just I'm I'm so good at making friends I just I don't start and I need to start starting

I need to start going to events I need to start hitting people up I need to start like randomly messaging people on Instagram you know what I mean FOMO is a good thing it's a teaching lesson I feel FOMO when people are doing things that I want to be doing and FOMO ultimately is kind of like jealousy in a sense where it's like if you feel FOMO that other people are hanging out with their friends baby girl that just means you want to go make friends to hang out with so go do those things go go meet those people go put yourself out there go be that annoying person until you go make a hundred million friends you are so likable you are so loved you are so deserving of good people in your life you just have to be brave enough to be vulnerable and I guarantee you

will find your crowd you'll will find your group you will find those people that you can randomly hit up on a Tuesday night to come fold laundry and they will come fold laundry with you you know what I mean but you have to be brave enough to go damn I wish I had friends so I'm gonna go make a million fucking friends and to go go out there and do so that's another big thing that I'm working on in my life is like I I just want to have people that I can reach out to um where I am now and a part of me is like well if you're moving like isn't that just a waste of time no no not at all I don't think any connection you make in this life is a waste of time as long as it's a good positive connection and when you feel inherently um called to and desired by so this

summer it's like everybody's out everybody's enjoying life everybody's wanting to do something everybody wants to go to the pool everybody wants to go to the lake everybody wants to go do something and have fun so this is a great time to go out there make connections meet people put yourself out there invite people over hey you want to do this hey you want to go to this concert you're at a concert maybe you're alone hey what's your name you're beautiful would love to hang out sometime i'm fucking with your vibe follow me on instagram like let's connect after this you see what i'm saying it's a fun flirty hot fucking summer and you should be doing all of the fun flirty hot fucking summer things not even in a romantic sense but just like flirting with life

we don't flirt with life often we flirt with like men and boys and girls and people that we want to fall in love with but like how often are you flirting with life how often are you romanticizing life how often are you like girls two in five canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar raised matters on september 19th join thousands in toronto for the princess margaret cancer foundation walk challenge yourself friends and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research together we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer register today at pmcfwalk.ca legendary is here with bet mgm sportsbook sign up to unlock access to hundreds of pre-match and live betting options for all

your favorite sports download the bet mgm app see bet mgm.com for terms 18 plus alberta only please play responsibly subject to eligibility requirements if gambling is affecting your mental health or well-being 211 alberta is here to help call or text 211 or visit ab.211.ca bet mgm operates pursuant to an operating agreement with the alberta i-gaming corporation standard message and data rates may apply so i have an interesting situation that the universe has put me in and i wanted to know what your opinion is on it and if you have any big sister advice for me because your girl's going through it i have had the worst month of my life um about a month ago today i was at a music festival in the mosh pit i lost my car keys and i sprained my ankle ankle was fucked for

about a week but i found the car keys in the last and found um and then a week later my car breaks down take it to the shop they told me that it's totaled great I don't have a car for three weeks now get a new car and then a week later I get fired from my job that I've been at for over three years and it's just interesting because like three years ago when I started this job I went through a really awful breakup and I had to move back home I didn't have a car I didn't have a job and it just feels like the universe has put me into this exact situation now that I'm older and I have more experience and it's testing me to see how I deal with it I don't know if that makes any sense I feel like you'll be able to word it better than me but with that being said one question because

I know you've done your fair share of being waitress and serving can I make enough money to still be able to live on my own if I become a waitress or bartender anyways love you thank you i hope you have an amazing day baby that mercury retrograde pre-shadow phase is hitting you hard and what you're going through is probably gonna be what a lot of people are going to be going through where you're like god i'm not your strongest soldier but listen here's the thing like you literally put it first of all things keep happening and you're like what the fuck but the universe kind of does this silly little thing silly little thing where if you refuse to create momentum in your life if you refuse to move forward if you refuse to make choices for yourself

the universe will make those choices for you and they usually come in the form of challenges i know i know so challenge number one sprain your ankle lost your car keys okay we solve that challenge done also things kind of come in threes so consider hopefully this being done you've hit your third it's kind of funny how things happen in threes but that happened okay next car broken down totaled bam second thing third thing fired from the job you're like whoa I am being thrown on my fucking ass but also look at how far you came from the last time you were thrown on your ass in a bad breakup to where you came now and think about how far forward you can go sometimes to actually get moving and get momentum you kind of have to hit rock bottom to realize I want to

climb further I want to go further I need to work harder I need to do more and specifically with this retrograde and with things coming up it is going to throw us on our ass and it's going to be like how bad do you want to get up how bad do you want those things how hard are you willing to work for what you want especially when you won't make choices for yourself it really will make that choice for you so first of all I'm so sorry this is happening to you I think this is something that a lot of people are gonna probably be going through so like you got it over early you are now at what most people might consider rock bottom but you know there's only up from here at least period point blank no matter how bad things fucking get there's always up there's always up

you can always go up okay also last question like you said can you really make enough at a restaurant to survive yeah yes absolutely yes absolutely people always go out to eat okay i mean find a restaurant that has like hot it's like busy every night maybe it's a local maybe it's a small restaurant maybe it's like you gotta wear a tie to work who cares but like go to a place that you know you're gonna make money at that has like a high volume of people that like the average dish is probably like 15 to 25 bucks okay you'll make money you'll make money i promise you that restaurants are money glitches and if you need to make money go work at a restaurant go become a bartender they really are an infinite money glitch it's crazy how it happens you will get

a new job you will find a new car you will find a new place to live you will your ankle will heal everything will be good but yes the universe especially during retrogrades likes to challenge us and go how bad do you want it how hard are you willing to work for yourself where do you want to go and then forcing you to then create it for yourself and it feels like you want to rip your fucking hair out but just know at the end of it all you will be further than you ever could have imagined you'll be in a better place than you ever could have imagined you will be blessed after going through it sometimes you have to go through challenges to get to where we want to go especially if we feel like we're not making that movement ourselves so like i said i'm so sorry

you're going through a hard time but I love you and you will get through this and just know things come in threes the three is over hopefully nothing else happens now you can focus on looking forward applying to jobs hustling bustling making some money making some coin getting a new car working your way up to a new place that you never could have imagined when my last car got stolen I kind of went through a situation like this um two mercury roaster grades ago where it was like cat sick car stolen mess of a life right after that i got put in a place that i never could have imagined i got car my dreams cat healthier than ever things are good things are fine things are wonderful but i had to go through it to get through it so i can leave you with any sort of

affirmation baby just go through it to get through it okay go through it to get through it you will get through it and then blessings will be abundant and abound but yes you can make enough money at a restaurant to survive trust trust there's so many career servers out there you just got to find the right restaurant that meshes well that people are willing to spend money at and that you feel like you fit in that's not going to make you want to rip your hair out working out but you got this i believe in you stay strong show yourself extra self-love during this time and go through it to get through it okay trying to be the biggest romantic in your life possible that's what you need to be doing okay we need to be flirting with activities of life that's how you find joy

and fun this summer i'm not even kidding flirting is so fun the act of flirting is so fun because it's like so fucking unserious it really is it's just like here's a little wink here's a little nudge here's a little hi how are you all the fucking things very silly very light-hearted very like i don't really give a fuck where this goes i just like seeing how you react to me like it really is that way and so instead of doing that with people like do that with life okay go get fun and flirty and romantic with life it'll make your life just so much more enjoyable you know who's great at flirting with life someone you can um look to this season addison ray she is such a big fucking flirt and i say that in like the most positive way ever

because if you listen to her music if you if you see her photos how she dresses how she presents herself like she is just flirting with the idea of life of luxury of enjoyment of fulfillment and it's not like a monetary value it's not in like a flexing value it really is just like i am discovering who i am and what i want to be and how i want to present myself and it's going to be weird and messy and wild and cute and sexy and all the fucking things but i'm gonna do it i'm gonna put myself out there and i don't like give a fuck how it goes i'm just gonna do it and that is such a beautiful model to live by bitch get out there and flirt flirt with life flirt with friends flirt with the idea of having a wonderful life and it'll come to you i promise you that is a belly button

piercing worth it heard it takes forever to heal but they're so cute you guys i'm thinking about getting have you seen the like like anchor piercings where it's a piercing in your skin then it's like held in there by an anchor i really want those but like on my back dimples but i don't know if i'm brave enough to do that so i think i'm just gonna go with a tattoo i don't know i'm in a mood to just like i need to change something i need more tattoos i feel like i'm not covered in enough i want like leg tattoos arm tattoos cute little dainty tattoos all my tattoos are also like nostalgia based so that's kind of fun it's a good energy to lean into this summer i really want um a cicada tattoo i want a horseshoe i would love like a lace garter tattoo i feel like that's

hot sexy super fun um but i got my belly button piercing in september um i also want more ear piercings but I got my belly button piercing in September they got it like right at the beginning of September it was healed by by the new year it was it was healed by the new year if I'm being honest it was so quick easiest piercing I've ever had my nose took two years to heal my nipples they took like upwards of three years to heal I'm not even kidding for them to not be so like sensitive belly button like six months max max now in the summer I got it in the fall that's the key okay especially if you're doing things this summer swimming you know you're in chlorine you're sweating wait until the fall that's probably the only advice i'll give you wait until the fall do

it september october by spring summer it'll be healed you'll be fine you'll be hot you'll be sexy you'll be rocking a belly button piercing but i love my belly button piercing zero pain literally did not hurt at all so easy to heal just get some like a bacterial spray super simple and also as somebody with like a belly listen i'm a woman i have a belly most women have bellies let's be fucking real i love decorating my like a decolletage in a way i know decolletage is your chest but like i feel like there's other ways of decorating different parts of your body and i love doing that with jewelry with piercings with accessories and so i my my belly felt naked i needed something and so i'm so glad i got my belly button piercing like i have my rings for my hands

i have bracelets for my hands i have nails for my hands or i have necklaces for my chest i have earrings for my head sometimes i'll do like a bandana a hat nose piercing okay um toes i even have toe rings on like i love decorating nipples all right belly button you know i love decorating i love having like sparkles and jewels and accessories it's so fun life is supposed to be fun if that's not you that's not you all right you know yourself but if you're thinking about getting your belly button piercing it is literally the most simple easiest piercing you could possibly get and if you need a little change in self you're feeling crazy it's probably the easiest thing you could get done definitely and like not super permanent you can pretty much take it out

you're gonna have a small hole but like if you don't like it in the future you can always take it out it's not like a tattoo that's on you on you someone asked are you watching love island and would you ever go on it okay i haven't been watching it but i need to i need to lock in now that Casa Amor is here I'm I'm I cannot watch that many episodes of any sort of show it's just not gonna happen I need to figure out how to recap as fast as possible but um no but I like the hunger games of it all I like the silliness and the unseriousness of it all of just like also observing people's interactions it kind of gives Stanford Prison Experiment a little bit where it's like what the fuck are they gonna do we have no clue we got no clue i don't like the aspect where people

are like diving so deeply into other people's lives and like trying to control them that's weird it's like just sit back watch and observe eat your popcorn and then turn it off like it really can be that simple when it comes to shows like this um i'm not one who likes to play games i'm not a game player so i don't know if i could be on it i feel like i would be really bad at the games i'd probably like panic but also a part of me is like i think i'd be really good at it i think i would definitely not be me on that show i don't think i could be hannah but i could be like hannah like i think i could be her you know what i mean i don't know it's always fun to see like what's going on what's the dynamics because the people on the shows whether it's like um

from the different countries the dynamics are always different between the men and the women like the dynamic between american men and women is very different than the dynamic between the australian men and women or the european men and women it's very interesting to see like the dynamics in dating culture and like how men need to be chosen or maybe women need to be chosen or women don't give a fuck about being chosen anymore they just want to be supported like it it's so it's so i'm just like so curious about it all you know and i mean if i was on love island I would definitely go into it with like an air of unseriousness of just like I'm here to have fun and look hot and enjoy myself but bitch being in a bikini that long all day that long all day

I don't know but I do know if I was on love island I would only be wearing sydney mary bikinis that's for sure and I'd be the hottest one out there because of that that's for sure oh I don't know I do love that love island comes out in the summer because it really is just like it's another reason flirt with life like people on that show are not like they should not be taking that shit seriously you are not there to find love you're there to win however much money it is like go there be unserious flirt your little heart out enjoy your time like have fun try and make every situation as fun as possible if someone tries you bitch do what you can to fix that situation or to handle your shit and move on like who cares it's exactly how summer should be so i do love that it

comes out during the summer as like another reminder of like life's not serious just go have fun play the game enjoy your time maybe find love who knows but just like go be yourself and enjoy and I love that kind of aspect of it it gets a little too deep dark and spooky and scary when it becomes like too when people get like too attached when they get too crazy like baby you don't know them you've been there for a week you don't know them and that's okay like but you know yourself and that's what you should listen to but yeah love island i don't know if i could do it i don't know if i could do it i don't like men that much like they need okay if i had like a million dollars i would do a love island but it's like only like gay like lgbtq so like poly people or

um bi people gay straight like lesbians like throw them all in there and double the amount of people and then like see who matches up like i think that's really fun where it's like oh this guy and guy are getting together or this girl and girl or this guy and girl and guy like i would i would like let's get crazy fuck it fuck it what do you have to lose let's get crazy let's get the lgbtq community into the love island someone okay this is a really good question am i wrong for choosing singleness and celibacy during my 20s i don't really seek out romantic relationships because i'm truly satisfied by myself but i understand how this can hold me back from new experiences and opportunity for growth i think i'm also feeling pressure today because my friend

group is very coupled up and i'm the only single one left standing i just don't want my dating life to be a result of societal pressure but genuine interest and that's part that's the part i've been struggling with i think this is something a lot of younger people are going through it's it doesn't need to be a struggle okay of course you feel the societal pressure like when i talk to my grandmother when are you getting married when are you having kids there's obviously going to be a societal pressure of like the the coupling up okay love island does happen in real life too babe they the pressure is on to couple up but also like i don't think you should just go out there and pick willy-nilly like i don't think i think how you are living is how a lot of young people

are living and i'm so proud of the young people who are choosing themselves over mediocre love over being chosen over choosing someone else over conforming to society we are the first pretty much the first group in all of history to finally go actually i want to do whatever the fuck i want to do and i don't give a fuck about external pressure i don't give a fuck about societal pressure i know what i want i know who i am i know exactly what i'm looking for and if it doesn't fit that criteria then like why waste my fucking time and i think that is so admirable i think it's so amazing i think it's so wonderful and sure does it mean you have to like maybe wait a little bit longer or take some more time to yourself or like appreciate yourself more to then

receive what you're looking for sure yeah but also it's like is settling down really going to give you what you want no not at all yes your friends are in relationships yes the people around you are in relationships that's okay i'm sure you also hear them complain about those relationships a lot i'm sure you also hear them talk shit about those relationships a lot or they're wonderful they're in love they're fantastic and that's something you can look at and go damn they did it i can do it too you know what i mean don't let outside pressure conform you into something that you are not ready to do that is one thing that we as women really need to learn especially bingo bongo me myself um to like your love for yourself can be enough your love and appreciation for

yourself can be enough your um time alone two in five canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar raised matters on september 19th join thousands in toronto for the princess margaret cancer foundation walk challenge yourself friends and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. At Desjardins Insurance, we know that when you own a nail salon, everything needs to be perfect from tip to toe. That's why our agents go the extra mile to understand your business and provide tailored solutions for all its unique needs.

You put your heart into your company, so we put our heart into making sure it's protected. Get insurance that's really big on care. Find an agent today at Desjardins.com slash business coverage. Phone can be enough. Being just with yourself can be just as beautiful as having a partner. And if you are looking for a partner to match a certain amount of criteria or to live up to standards that you are living up to yourself it's not like crazy standards like

they need to have 18 million dollars and a yacht and this and that all these things that you don't have it's like no i just want an equal partner okay men talk about equality all the time equality equality equality gen z men be like we're splitting the bill and we're both getting fingered on the first date that's a tweet i saw the other day and it had me dying oh my god but it's like you talk equality equality equality like if there are things that you are able to inhabit that is something your partner should also be able to inhabit too even if it's something as simple as like doing the fucking laundry or the dishes or cleaning the house or vacuuming or being able to save for retirement or hold down a steady job have a nice car not even like nice but just like take

care of the things around you to be able to take care of yourself to take to know your self-worth and hold yourself to those standards like if you are able to do that equality your partner should also be able to do those things as well and if you are waiting to find somebody who can live up to the standards that you have set and achieved for yourself there's no problem in that okay sure you get lonely sometimes i get it lean on your friends get a cat get a dog find somewhere you can put that love because you do have love to share with yourself and with other people i know you want to share that love with other people you do have friends you have a good environment to be around but i don't think i don't think you will ever regret waiting and putting yourself first i think

i should have done more of that in my life like i said no regrets but i definitely i i need to put more into myself going forward than i've ever have and i'm gonna have to be brave and do so but i'm following after you in these steps of like bitch if i can do it then i need a partner who can do that as well I need people around me in my life who can do that as well and yeah does that mean you know going on dates and being like this is a loser I'm never talking to you again yeah sometimes does that mean um being disappointed by people and what they want for themselves yeah sure but that doesn't mean you need to be disappointed by your choices and who you surround yourself with it's okay I know it's definitely hard but how blessed are we to be able to have

this choice and to stand strong beside it so cheers to that girlfriend stay strong you will find who is meant for you eventually i promise you that hey girl um first off love the pod love you i'm thinking about joining the patreon to just see what's going on over there because i love the pod honestly makes my week anyways so my boyfriend and i we just broke up because it got physical um basically um so yeah that is definitely over and done and now i'm just like i'm just trying to live my best life i don't know like i went to a party last night a grab party last night with my parents and it was it was great it was fun um and i just need like more ideas of like just to like fill my life with i don't know more things that like feed the soul you know okay thank you

love you oh baby girl oh baby girl i love you i'm first of all so sorry you went through that god i fucking hate it makes me like talk about anger bitch i'm angry for you but i'm proud of you for going no no no fuck you get the fuck out of my life never talk to me again thank you for doing that you please thank you so much you were you were i need to like give you your flowers for being able to understand and see a situation that you're like nope this is not gonna fucking work and getting the fuck out of there it takes a lot of bravery it takes a lot of courage it takes a lot of trust in self it takes a lot of just like work and so i'm i just want to give you your flowers because i think a lot of women get themselves out of situations that people go

duh you should get out of there but don't realize how hard it is to do so so i'm just gonna go ahead and give you your praise and your flowers because you deserve it okay i'm so proud of you for getting the fuck up out of there and i hope he rots i hope they rot in hell okay because they will period anyways okay post breakup first of all breakups are so transformational you will come out of it hotter more secure more focused on self one PSA I'm going to give you is do not jump back into another relationship do not jump back into another relationship sure you know go have your flirts have your flings have your things here and there whatever if you feel cold or desire to do so if you don't want to do so whatever you don't have to but if I can give you one piece of

like real advice it's don't jump right back into another relationship people do this all the time when they don't want to grow when they don't want to change and they want the easy way out of life they jump relationship to relationship to relationship to relationship that is self abandonment i think it's important to be alone in this life for a little bit because it's the best way to know more about yourself learn more about yourself to build a good community around you to have good friendships and to then live your life how you want and desire without any sort of weird external issues all right that sometimes a partnership can bring so first of i love that you were like fuck it i'm going to a party with my parents that's hilarious that's

something i would definitely do um i need you to keep doing things on a whim like that when you're like do i go to this thing yes go do it should i hit up this person yes do it should i go take this class abso-fucking-lutely do i go on a walk right now for sure do i start journaling yes of course do i pick up this book absolutely yes yes yes yes yes the answer is yes to all of those things you need to get out you need to live life you need to learn about yourself in accordance with life by being outside by being active by going to parties by chatting with people by taking classes by taking courses by picking up hobbies by literally anything you feel called to do post breakup you should always explore and if you're like i don't know what i feel called to

do bitch get on some community forums get on pinterest whatever you feel called to like look out on pinterest go create that thing in your life that's kind of i think pinterest is like a manifestation tool and i use it as a manifestation tool constantly where if i am pinning things that i am like enjoying or like oh i like how this is set up or i like this vibe i like this country thing or i like this horse or i like this art setup i will then go well i like it so let me create it in my own life i'm a visual thinker and a visual learner and so if there's like an image or something you see or a post on instagram you're like damn i wish i could do that or i love that they did that you can go fucking do those things you just have to go seek them out in your world

right now and right now you are an abundant place of yes you are in a place of self-exploration you are in a place of self-fulfillment and so you need to tell yourself yes to everything you want to everything you desire yes you want that thing go get it you want to do that thing you can be that person you want to inhabit that activity congratulations you want to go to that party go do it does that mean you might feel a little fearful you might feel a little scared you might feel a little nervous well yeah everything new is going to make you a little nervous duh hello but that nervousness is really just excitement it really is just like that um really the possibility of who you can be is what you're thinking about and i want you to go

be everything that you desire possible because you are deserving of it you did the hard thing the hard thing is done everything from here should be fun fulfilling and joyful period point blank you deserve it go treat yourself to a little self-care go have a good meal go party it out go dance go release that energy from your hips through dance it's such a powerful tool i am so proud of you and from here on out i know there are beautiful things in front of you you just need to go forth go forth go strong oh with that being said you guys what an episode what a freaking episode i love you all so much your support and your kindness and appreciation to me like genuinely means the world i love getting on here every single week and sharing my life and what i go

through and what i grow through with you guys um i'm so grateful and appreciative to have people in my life like you who are here for me who hear me out and who make me feel less alone i know i feel less alone with you guys so i hope i can make you guys feel less alone in this life as well and i'm so thankful for you guys showing up every single week if you want to join the patreon i answer every single question every single week on patreon for the patreon exclusive podcast on thursdays i also upload weekly inspiration directly from my pinterest and tumblr i'm about to do a mercury retrograde write-up but i do full moon and new moon write-ups if you're ever like what the fuck is going on in the stars what is this energy baby full write-up is gonna be there plus

just many other things i have a book club review coming up soon lots of fun things vlogs also go up early there but if you want to watch the vlogs they come out every sunday on youtube at hannah marlene 444 i'm hoping to go horseback riding this week but don't hold me to that we'll see what the weather brings i really am just like taking it day by day baby girl but with that being said I love you all so incredibly much thank you for being you stay sane stay sexy and I'll see you all so soon two and five Canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer

Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. Want to talk ETFs with the people behind them? join me, Etienne-Jean Cabouchard, on the Upside Ticker Talk. We dive into what's moving markets with timely analysis, trends, and answers to ETF questions you've actually been thinking about. Hit play on the Upside Ticker Talk and elevate your ETF investing IQ.