Smoke Sesh - girls girl, insecure men & why so serious?

Episode Date: May 12, 2026

hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of smoke sesh! today we chat what ive been up to, staying busy, the eras of Hannah, allowing yourself to grow, trying new things out, motherhood, will I have children, being a mother, parenthood, having kids, making mistakes, being better, taking accountability, apologizing, moving forward, non monogamy, polyamory, multiple partners, ethical non monogamy, faking the big O, types of big Os, fun in the bedroom, love island, drama, being a girls girl, societal pressures on women, competing with women, supporting women, insecure men, red flag behavior, losing your sparkle, doing it tired, finding the energy to support your hobbies, living a full life, taking things too seriously, having fun with life, energetic bubble, allowing energy in and out, financial pressure, financial insecurity, money problems, dreaming big, chasing after your dreams, doing the hard work, and much much more!join the patreon! new episodes (and more) at patreon.com/smokeseshshawtysubmit your questions and call ins every week on instagram.com/hannahmarlenewatch the new vlogs every Sunday on YouTube at hannahmarlene444

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash, so come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life, the good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing, I've got a story for it all. hello hello hello hotties of the world and welcome back to another episode of smoke sesh my name is your host and i am so sleepy i'm honestly so sleepy thus i'm chugging a celsius um hoping this goes directly to my dome so the energy is hype i'm feeling it though it's been a fantastic

day so far also for my celsius lovers out there i found the best flavor ever it is the fizz free pink lemonade oh we i just have a feeling that the flavor of the summer for me personally and for the spring is pink lemonade is there truly anything better not spons but i wish celsius hit me up because truly you are the only thing keeping me alive right now my days have just been busy busy busy busy I've been a busy little bee this spring truly and thank god because I don't know for the past three years of my life I've done what feels like nothing what feels like nothing compared to what I am doing now which thank god is like a lot and a lot of things that I enjoy and I'm keeping myself busy with hobbies and activities and painting and horseback riding

and being outside in nature and going swimming and working and you know all the adult things as well but i just have not been this busy in a while and my brain is having a hard time keeping up my alarm went off this morning at 7 a.m yes went immediately out to the ranch to do my horseback riding lesson for the week and you guys i officially signed my lease with miss xena oh my god I'm so excited she truly is just the best we I haven't gotten a lot of rides in with her maybe like 10 rides total but just her bond so far and how sweet she is and her just how much she takes care of me as a rider and you know the other way around has been so nice just getting to bond with one horse versus like I mean when I was doing lessons it was different horses every time

so different personalities every time it's nice to kind of actually get to enmesh my emotions a little bit and to really just kind of get to ride whenever i want i went out a couple times this past week after signing my lease on tuesday wednesday on wednesday and yes i am officially not technically but practically in the responsibility aspect of it all a horse owner and did i ever expect this for myself no absolutely not did anybody in my life ever expect this from me no absolutely not but you know this past weekend was mother's day shout out to my mothers out there okay if you are a mother and you're listening to this podcast you deserve the world you deserve the world you deserve everything you want mothers are what keeps the world spinning

and truly it is just so incredible like if you think about it how we as women are able to create life and bring it into the world and go through that it's actually magical if you think about it and also a little traumatic so shout out to you for doing that shout out to you for being a mother or if you are a pet mom or any if you have responsibilities girl shout out to you you deserve all the love so i'm like where was i going with that this past weekend was mother's day and I got to see my grandma I got to see my mom we went out to this cute little country tea room and we had a little tea lunch it was very sweet and adorable um but I was just chatting with my mom and she's like oh yeah you know like we come from a long lineage of horse people

my hello why did I never know about this I knew about some of them but it really ended or stopped with my mom's generation her cousins her her siblings everybody from like that that next generation down really did not participate at all in like the the farm life the country life the the horse life and so it really just died and I'm like you know what it's my job to bring it back it is my job to bring it back and it has just been so nice to get involved with and so inspiring and So just confidence building. So I'm just so excited to see what this summer brings. Oh my goodness.

It's going to be so fun just going out on the trails and getting to know people and hopefully strengthening my skills. Like I said, it's a great confidence boost because I have realized, wow, I haven't learned anything new in a long time and I love learning. And if I can really tell you anything, it's be appreciative of any sort of knowledge you gain. i think we as young people who are forced into school and to kindergarten and elementary and middle school and then high school and then college if you can do that it's like it doesn't

feel like a privilege but it absolutely is and once you get out of the learning sphere once you graduate high school or graduate college you know move on from where it's more rigid to you're just existing in life you do kind of miss learning new things I know at least I do as somebody who likes to grow and change and sometimes it's hard to be your own teacher sure with some aspects or activities it might be easier but I was just craving strengthening my brain a little bit and challenging myself and learning something new and so this has just been so fulfilling for that and so incredibly fun so cheers to a hot girl country summer I feel like my aesthetic has completely changed but i feel more myself than i ever have been and i feel like i've gone through

so many phases i was just driving home today thinking about this well i was driving with elementary school and they were doing field day did you guys ever do field day in elementary school comment down below if you ever did field day field day was the best fucking day in elementary school i feel like maybe this is more of a midwestern thing where it's like the last ish day of the year in elementary school and you just go outside and you play games all day and you're in different teams sometimes it's like two students from each class every age range are in a team together and you know the art teacher would have a team and she'd make them all like matching bandanas you're like damn fuck i wish i was on the art teacher's team so i had some swagged out clothing to wear

um and you would just play games all day you play water games you would um have to bring like a swimsuit and like swim clothes you could spray each other with like water guns at the end of the day they'd always like prank the principal it was always the best day so I was driving by that and I was like oh my god so precious but also I feel like so old and it sent me into this spiral where I just started thinking about all the different eras the Hannah eras who are of everything that I have done and been and tried and challenged myself to do I've been a lot of things I've been a soccer player I've been a track athlete I've been a cross country runner I've been an artist I've been a pianist I've been a I've been a groupie I followed concerts around I've

been that hippie girl I've been the yoga chick I've been the rave girl I've been the bartender I've been the dive bar girl I've been a lot of things and they all serve me well and they all serve me for a specific amount of time some of them I've carried my entire life like being an artist um but the when i allowed myself to be curious about something and to just try it out and see if it fit it always fulfilled me i always had a good time i always enjoyed it and maybe it didn't stick forever like my rave phase which thank god i did not need to be that into drugs let's be honest um shout out to my sober ravers out there you are the real ones i just can't be in that environment anymore without like craving molly so i just i can't do it i can't do it but

when i allow myself to like get an idea of like hmm i'd love to try that i have always allowed myself to do so maybe not right away but eventually i've been like all right fuck it let's try it out and i've always had just like the best time ever no matter the era i was in and you know eventually some of them come to a close where I'm like I just it doesn't resonate with me anymore I've grown I've changed it doesn't fit in with my schedule whatever it may be and I leave that in the past but also by just experiencing it I feel comfortable enough to also move forward so although I have an inkling in my heart that the the horse world is probably going to be with me forever I'm also okay with allowing myself to if I need to eventually for whatever reasons financial

living situation whatever maybe move on if necessary because I'm getting my fill right now so if I can encourage you with your summer break if you have a summer break coming up or with your weekends if you have a weekend coming up or with your three hours you get after work because you're working a lot whatever it is to explore that side of yourself that you've always been like hmm I want to try that hat on I want to try that opportunity I want to put myself out there it is just always so fulfilling and so worth it you don't have to stick with things forever I feel like my parents really tried to rein that in on me of like no if you're doing something you do it forever and it made me unable to quit things that I knew weren't

good for me relationships habits activities i had to kind of find that freedom on my own but i realized there is beauty in allowing yourself to just try something put your all into it and even at the end of the day if you're like i've grown from this i've changed i don't want to do this anymore that's okay because you at least tried it on you know yes i had a beautiful weekend mother's day with my mom i worked and then i went horseback riding just did a little arena work and then went to a winery afterwards what is a name a better day okay horseback riding back-to-back winery yeah perfect situation for me and then yeah woke up bright and early today more horseback riding more horseback riding tomorrow more work tomorrow but thus is life do what you love and

work for what you love that's what it's all about but that's my little ramble of hope and inspiration for you all this morning i actually have a lot of questions i want to get to today so i shall waste no more time and we'll get right into them oh actually psa before we get into it i did upload a new vlog for the week it is up on youtube at hannah marlene 444 it is just like a deep cleaning vlog where i just deep clean my entire house um if you want to watch that it's up now go binge watch it i just ate a shit ton of gummies and deep clean my house it was a vibe and also my house needed a real good clean i have been posting a lot on patreon and more to come um weekly inspiration sunday journal prompts tarot readings moon cycle reading monthly playlists

monthly um forecast of things that i'm looking towards we just do a lot over there plus weekly episodes and also the vlogs are uploaded early there so if you want to see them early if you're like i need to binge content i basically post every single day on patreon i make it worth your under ten dollars sometimes even just five bucks patreon.com slash smokes as shoddy and if you want to see what i'm up to i'm going to be posting a lot of the weather's nice and i'm just doing a lot follow me on instagram at hannah marlene i actually made um this chicken shawarma wrap oh it was fire i was so stoned and i had the munchies and so that recipe will be going up this week and also I'm I've been craving I know you've seen them I know you've been craving them

too if you're a mozzarella stick girl like me I've been craving the Chili's mozzarella sticks let me be honest I went to Chili's I had the Nashville mozzarella sticks they sucked they had way too much salt and also they weren't fried all the way through I was like I can fucking make this better at my house so I'm gonna I'm gonna make them better at my house and I'm gonna eat an entire block of cheese to myself and it's going to be fantastic and i cannot wait but if you want that recipe that will also be up hopefully this week and that's about it but yeah let's see what is on your guys's minds i guess since we chatted about mother's day someone said thoughts on motherhood honestly shout out to the moms out there like i said that is that is that's a job

and i know that's a job because i've been a nanny and i've literally worked the job and been paid for the job and now I think about all the mothers who mother and don't get paid for it and their child is screaming in their face and I'm like wow cut that girl some slack that's insane that's bonkers truly bonkers I love kids I love being around kids I have a challenging idea on motherhood internally because like I'm still young hot and turnt let's be honest like I just am not in the place where I think I could be a good mother well I could if I was really put to the test but thank god we have a choice choice matters choice is important utilize that choice okay my iud and me against the world for real i love my iud i do not love the bacne she gives me i'll tell you that

but right now i kind of just love being an aunt i think i'm still enjoying my 20s and i should be allowed to enjoy my 20s and i have a lot of settling down to do i would prefer to be married before i have children i would prefer to have a house before i have children or at least like one singular place before i have kids um with property with land and a good neighborhood and a good school district like those are things i really think about and want to set up for my children because that's something that i had set up for me and it set me up for like a fantastic childhood a really good childhood i had a great support system i had good friends who lived next door to me I went to a fantastic school district and I was very blessed that I didn't move at all

through my childhood and I truly think it made for a great experience and shout out to my parents for doing that for me because now I know I want to give it to my kids I also don't know where I want to live yet I don't know if I want to live in Kansas for the rest of my life I I'd be happy to the winters I don't know how many more winters I can survive like that but maybe I want to live in california maybe i want to live in a different country who knows there's still things i'm figuring out about myself and i want to have those figured out before i decide to have children so then i'm able to be the best most present most solid mother that i possibly can be i also need to find a really good therapist before i have kids but yeah i do think i eventually want to be a mom

i also think i'd be so happy not having children there's always the what ifs like oh what life could be if I did or if I didn't and I'm okay with the what ifs as long as I'm happy in the present of where I am with kids without kids it doesn't matter to me as long as I am happy and present in who I am um it's never something that I've always like envisioned for myself I think it's just something that's always been like uh something I've been aware of because I'm a woman and because children are pushed so heavily onto us but I don't know talking to my grandma my mom or my mom's like yeah I had my first kid at 21 and my grandma was like yeah I had my first kid at 18 it's like I'm about to turn 27 27 and I'd like to keep those years without children

until my mid-30s if I'm if I'm being honest my IUD expires when I'm like 33 and I'm like perfect that is perfect timing you know now whatever you do on your timeline is valid and important whatever choices you make with your body is valid and important but i i really do just think it's important for people to be whole people to be a solid foundation before they are around kids and before they have children of their own i really am trying to avoid the generational trauma of it all i'm trying to avoid the passing down of trauma of it all and that takes time it takes being aware of yourself and it takes uh knowing what is best but yeah i could definitely envision myself having a child daughter okay god if you're real and out there and listening to me daughter um and if i

don't i don't that's okay i'll have horses instead and i think i'll be very happy with that but yes shout out to my moms you deserve the world you are quite literally magical and if you think about it portals of life and i think that's so beautiful i'm actually reading a book right now the monthly book club another thing we do on patreon called when god was a woman and it's all about how we have or society has warped the idea idea of womanhood and really demeaned it because they know how much power we hold and how beautiful it is and how sacred it is and they don't want us to feel that power and i find that very interesting especially with the realm of christianity and adam and eve and blah blah blah blah so if you're interested in a good book or just focusing on

those themes of womanhood and how beautiful it is when god was a woman i i personally have been loving it so far hi diva any tips on growing from past mistakes so it doesn't affect my relationship your mistakes are someone else's mistakes that's the real question here um both the same answer the only way to grow from a mistake is to a take responsibility it's okay to be like yeah i fucked up okay i had a hard time with that growing up because i never wanted to be i never wanted to upset people people please i never wanted to upset people i never wanted to like be in the wrong in that sort of sense I never wanted to make anybody upset but we're human we're gonna say the wrong thing we're gonna do the wrong thing we're gonna make someone upset at

some point in time um so accepting responsibility if it's if it's truly something you did wrong sometimes people just like won't like the way you are but you are who you are and you can't really change that so you have to be aware when it's like a real mistake versus one that someone's putting on you for just being yourself so take responsibility apologize that lets people know that you are specifically aware of what you did wrong and you feel sorry about it not oh sorry you feel that way that's not an apology sorry i did that i did not mean to hurt you and i do not want to hurt you that's a real apology oh sorry you feel that way yeah bitch i do feel that way and it's because of you and that's not a real apology that's just a manipulative tactic i don't

fuck with that kind of apology so responsibility apology and then don't do it again simply put people are very happy to be like oh yeah i'm so sorry because they know it's an easy out and then to do the same thing over and over and over and over and over again that's called manipulation all right that is not okay that is not a real apology that is not real growth that is not real change responsibility apology and taking action to not do it again when you are aware of what's going on aware of how it hurts somebody you also naturally will be if you like the person inclined to not do it again which is very good so just like don't act on that thing or don't behave in that manner whatever it might have been um when you do really genuinely feel sorry you naturally

will be inclined to not do that thing again thus if someone is doing something over and over and over and apologizing but still doing it they don't give a fuck and they will keep doing that and you probably do need to walk away because that is not real responsibility that is manipulation but i think with those three key things you will be a okay and i'm somebody who will always allow people the space and time and growth to change i mean if you really fucking do me dirty i might disappear and that's on me you know i'm happy to walk away but if it's somebody who's like in your life you know we're human you fucked up even if it's you you're like damn i shouldn't have done that didn't mean to my bad you can't just apologize and pretend like it never happened again you have

to take responsibility apologize and don't do it again in the future now i do think sometimes when people are hurt they like to do the pity party thing which is like bringing it up over and over and over and over again because they feel bad so they want you to feel bad too that's not going to help either of you remedy the situation that's not going to help either of you get rid of like those feelings those emotions that are going on and i do argue that if you are done dirty and you feel the need to bring it up over and over and over again as a way for them to repent and for them to feel as bad as you do maybe they hurt you so bad that you do need to walk away it is time for you to go i've been many a situations where it's like oh well i'll just get back no don't get

back get gone okay but yeah we all make mistakes we're all human and the sooner you accept your humanness for what it is because we are not gods we are not perfect creatures the easier it is to become a better person easily easily all right you got this it's okay there's nothing you've done that i probably haven't done you know i've apologized for a lot of things in my life nothing like evil malicious horrible but definitely like oh shit sorry yeah i just wasn't thinking i'm i didn't take into account your emotions i wasted your time you know we're human it is what it is responsibility apology and moving forward what are your opinions on ethical non monogamy hmm i think it's the most unethical thing you can do no i'm just kidding i'm just

kidding I don't think that's godly I'm joking I'm joking it's just not for me it's not for me personally it can work I've seen it work I've seen it work well in some cases I've seen it work bad in some cases I just know for a fact it is not for me it's not for me I don't want to see my partner with anybody else I don't want to think about my partner with anybody else it's not something I get off on I understand if that's something you get off on props to you girl go after it do what you need to do ethical non-monogamy is fine because it's going to be in an ethical situation you guys will have your own rules you'll have your own boundaries you'll do your own thing but me personally it's a no go but yeah what you do in your relationship is your

business as long as both people are safe trusting adults who have a good relationship with their with each other and with each other's partners however that may look in whatever situation that may be you know I've seen it work I have like gay friends who have very open relationships where they maybe don't sleep separate from each other but they'll bring in a third bring in a fourth they'll have fun at parties you know what I mean I feel like that's very common as long as both people are on the same page and that's you know what makes it ethical and that's okay but for me personally no no no no uh-uh nope and that's just because i do things the old school way okay i would love to be between two people i don't care what gender but two people and also i

do think like maybe if you want to be non-monogamous maybe you just want to be single well no i don't know it's so different for everybody i'm not going to judge you though do whatever you want like i said what do i think about ethical non-monogamy i don't give a fuck as long as it's ethical that's the big part because it can get tricky when it's like well what are the boundaries what are the what's the yeses what's the no's that's when it becomes a little unethical but ethical as long as two people are having fun or three or four or five as long as you're having a good time and trusting each other and sharing the love and respecting each other's boundaries i could not give less of a fuck what you do honestly how to stop faking orgasms i did

it a lot at first and now and i feel bad now okay valid i'm sure also your body is like girl we need to be getting that real shit okay okay can i tell you something that i've realized recently can i tell you something i've realized recently i realized you can kind of have as a woman well me personally i'm not going to speak on all women let me be honest because every every person's built different you can have different kinds of orgasms some of them are not as like super intense like toes curling body shaking but it's still like that heightened um feeling of like coming over the edge where you know you're having one but it's just not as intense i do think they ebb and flow and for me personally um the like penetration orgasms are not as intense but clitoral

stimulation orgasms are so i think it's important to know like of course your body your reactions and that can be discovered through just like self-play and knowing what does make your toes curl and your body shake okay what you know makes you feel the best and then also just like asking for that during sex you don't have to fake it anymore nor should you fake it but it's okay if you're like it's just not gonna happen today let me just get it over with like I understand you know the situations I think it's probably best learning wise for your partner to not do that so then they're able to actually figure it out on their own but I do think you knowing yourself and knowing what works best and then communicating that during sex is the way to orgasm every single

fucking time you know we are not mind readers we are not body readers like i said all women are built different we all have kind of different buttons and what feels good or what we prefer what touch we prefer what sensation we prefer every everybody is very much so different it's all based on preference and what you prefer but yeah like um your partner's not going to be able to figure that out if you fake it but they will be able to figure it out faster if you just tell them what you like if you just tell them what you like hey do this hey try this hey flip me over throw me from the ceiling you know like it's okay to communicate especially what you like during sex that's what your partner wants to hear you know what i mean i know it makes my job fucking easier

when my boyfriend's like do this i'm like yeah can do you know like whatever you need babe i got you that's the whole point like sex is fun in in general because i mean no matter how people how many people are participating it could be an orgy it could be a three-way it could be two people but the whole point of the activity is to indulge in pleasure so help your partner help you indulge in pleasure communicate what you like tell them what you need but yeah i did i kind of discovered that recently not recently it's been something i've been aware of but i more so like compartmentalized it recently because it's like no i do get off but it's not the same it's not necessarily faking because it's like it feels good but it's not the same as this other kind of orgasm i can't have

anyways that's a whole other conversation let me know if you also feel the same way down below if you're brave enough you do not have to comment that but definitely don't tell your partner you've been faking that's a secret we can keep here in the girls chat that's all right you can keep that it's okay to have some secrets here and there don't hurt their feelings but going forward it's also okay if they like struggle a little bit if they're like damn she usually gets off in 30 seconds it's like he's in for a rude awakening so you might as well bust out the toy tell him what you like tell your partner what you like tell him what you prefer tell him what buttons to push and you will never have to fake it again never again never ever if you're a young person who

doesn't have a lot of sex and is getting into sex also just it's best to not fake it it is i understand the people who have because i am also that girl but to have the best um to set yourself up for success to set your partner up for success and to set you both up for like real pleasure i think the best thing you can do for yourself is a like self-play and knowing what you like in a safe environment by yourself and knowing that fully so then you can communicate that to your partner what you enjoy would you ever go on love island oh hell nah never ever ever love island wouldn't know what to do with a girl like me honestly like i'm just bad at i'm like good at drama but i'm bad at fake liking people and i feel like if i went on love island i would just

hate a lot of people and I'm not a hateful person it really is just like a they get no sleep they're in the sun all day they're in a bikini all day I would probably get a yeast infection I'd be pissed off all day it just would not be good it would not be good and also it's like oh I'm here for love hell no it would be called fun island if I was there it'd be because I want to have the most fun possible I ain't looking for love definitely ain't looking for love looking for fun yes absolutely oh no but that's like a whole different realm of the type of people that i just i can't be and i can't fake it they would never know what to do with a real ass bitch like me i hate to say it but i do love watching the drama i am a drama fiend i love a real housewife i love a drama tv

show i love a baddies i love a i love a love island i love watching the drama being in it no not so much nope i will stay in the country in the middle of nowhere kansas and enjoy my peace and quiet i fear i'm not enough of a girl's girl oh how can i fix that illy no i've always been i i've always kept men at an arm's distance no offense men i know if you're listening here if you are a man who's listening to this podcast you are welcome don't even worry you know you are obviously not the problem trust the men who don't who are here know that thank you love you hashtag ally anyway i just personally have always kept men at arm's distance and that in tune has made other women feel like um like my allies like i will support a woman's wrong and a woman's right

you know what i mean like even women who are evil to men i'm like but low-key they ate with their evilness like low-key they did evil really good you know like i can't help it i just really can't not that i ever wish evil on anybody but it is kind of like a thing of like damn they really went there you know what i mean so i think it's because i've always understood the perspective of society i everything that's been pushed on me from society i really have rebelled against i've had an authority issue my entire life trust the amount of calls from the principal my parents have gone i've always had an issue with like rigid rules and regulation and you have to do all of these things and then go to school and then do this and then graduate and then go to college and then get

married and then have kids like i just really have always been very against that and so when i naturally as a woman saw the competition aspect that society pits against women they want us to hate each other or fear each other so then they have more control over us I naturally was like very much so like revolted against and I opened my arms I always have opened my arms very wide to any sort of woman until they give me a reason not to okay I'm not gonna just trust blind forever when my brother found out he was having a girl he kind of shared some fears from this like perspective he was having not that this was new at all but it was kind of like this full circle moment of he was on a plane he was on a business trip and he saw a little girl and

her mother sitting next to each other and they were flipping through you know like a people magazine one of those like tabloid magazines and they came across a page which is very common in these magazines that they issue every single month of who wore it better who looks best who you know did the best thing at this time and comparing and contrasting their bodies and their outfits and this and that and he saw this like little little girl maybe like five or six and their mother sitting together comparing and contrasting these women in a magazine and it is it seems so simple but it's so ingrained and it's taught so young that he really like saw that compartmentalized it and realized i never ever ever want my daughter to be in a situation like

that where they feel like they can't be themselves and other women can't be themselves or they are insecure about themselves because of other women or they see other women as competition it's something that's so taught and so ingrained that it's something that we have to work to kind of come out of as women you know especially it being fed spoon fed us from a young age we owe it to each other to be a girl's girl now listen if a woman does you dirty if anybody does you does you dirty i don't care i don't give a fuck about the gender if anybody does you dirty is evil is awful as someone you just simply put don't fuck with you don't have to fuck with them you don't have to you know spend time around them enjoy their presence enjoy their company but i think

in general when it comes to being a girl's girl there's a way you have to treat yourself in a way you have to treat other women where you lose that competition mindset i think being a girl's girl is simply put just not having that competition mindset and seeing women as individual people and respecting that individuality without comparing each other it doesn't mean you have to you know let women walk all over you it doesn't mean you have to you know let women be horrible and awful to you it doesn't mean you have to let them get away with things that's not what being a girl's girl is sometimes a girl's girl is being like hey bitch you're being evil and awful right now like sometimes that is being a girl's girl but at the end of the day a girl's girl is somebody who

sees you and respects you for your individuality as a woman doesn't demean you doesn't put you down and lets you be that individual person you know does not compare does not contrast you also have to treat yourself that same way you have to allow yourself to be an individual person to be who you are to love who you are to respect who you are without comparison or competition of other women because we are all beautiful we are all wonderful and i love all of us okay and we are all you know what makes us human is the differentialities that we all have and that's what's so amazing so beautiful but in my perspective that's kind of how i view the girl's girl of it all we don't have to be in competition of each other and you will realize

how easy it is to really allow women to be themselves and to love them nonetheless. I personally support women's wrongs and rights, but that's just me personally. You don't have to be on that same journey unless you're evil. I don't really fuck with evil people, but you guys know that. Hey girl, first of all, I love you and thank you so much for helping me with the voice memo sitch. Um, you're a real one and I, I really appreciate it because I really wanted to get this off my chest um I just broke up with my boyfriend like what was it almost a week ago and the reason is kind of crazy uh I mean like not crazy because men but crazy in that like why the fuck was it said to me in the first place I just want to know like what your reaction would

have been if it was you and like how you would have handled it um so here's a little backstory i went shopping obviously it's may right i'm trying to stock up on my summer clothes i'm trying to like find some cute fits yada yada you know when your boyfriend goes shopping with you and i try to make it such a painless experience like he waits outside the store i go and i do my thing i do a little try on haul afterwards you know so we get home i bought a couple fits right one of those fits being a romper okay like a romper with a fucking liner i think you kind of can assume where this is going um so this romper essentially covers like everything yeah my legs are gonna be out it's summertime like summer is the season and you know what happens in the

summertime it's fucking hot out and this isn't me saying it to you it's me just like like if i was talking to him like i'd be like trying to beat the fucking logic into him like what do you want me to fucking put on a coat in july you again you know where this is going so i put on like i'm doing all these try on things whatever the romper i put the romper on and he's like don't you think that's a little short whatever so then like we kind of go back and forth about it and in my head i'm like why the fuck does he have an opinion other than like you look great whatever later on because we're long distance um I text him and I'm like hey like what you said really bothered me like yada yada and here's like some of what he said to me like he goes oh I don't want your ass

and like your legs out for everybody to see like I don't know why you're wearing something that looks like a near bathing suit like for everybody to gawk at I can't even the last one was um oh like there's only a certain type of woman that would dress like that and that one was the one that made me break up with him because i'm like so so you're just you're just insecure and you're a fucking loser that's pretty much it like that's pretty much it you want to be in control essentially but in the moment i was so shocked that i was just kind of like going back and forth with him and engaging and i was just like this can't be serious like he's gonna apologize like he this like this cannot be fucking serious and then i'm like bro by your logic like i'm abandoned don't let me go to

beach don't catch me the beach like what the fuck like are you dead ass are you fucking dead ass so i just i'm just like sitting here like like that's an insecure man right because he claims that he's not insecure at all i mean it's just like oh like anybody anybody would want to like it's my feelings you should want to respect them yada yada and i'm just like but if it's not me looking for external validation at all it's summertime like i'm sorry that my legs are out like now we're sexualizing a pair of fucking legs like what about you when you wear shorts in the summertime like oh what about your legs pal like yeah okay like the fact that men are looking and then look at whatever men look at anybody whatever like it's not my problem that

doesn't make me the problem if anything like a man that's that's secure creates the space for a woman to feel beautiful and will protect her no matter what like you know what i mean i'm not saying something's gonna go down but in my head i'm like um like he should be looking out for her regardless like it doesn't matter what she could go down in the winter time when nobody's fucking tits are out like what are we saying here like what are we saying like what are we saying i just felt like i'm like okay am i too cute you just like feel intimidated by it and you just have to like start a fight okay cute just say that like like i just want to know how the fuck you would have reacted oh hell nah hell nah i'm i'm pissed off for you okay whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa

and the thing is it's like these fucking men they're it's like they're they're all they almost understand it and then it's like it just goes out the window first of all so glad you broke up with him because fuck that you would have been trapped in a miserable horrible toxic relationship speaking of someone actually asked and it was like someone said what are some signs that a man is extremely emotionally manipulative this this is a fantastic perfect example trying to control anything about you who you are what you wear what you do who you hang out with the way you behave any sort of demeaning downward talk about that not good very manipulative okay we are not toys for them to carry around although they want us to be all right another great example from this them not

listening to you when you speak up about how they're in the fucking wrong okay like i said he's almost there he's like but but if if your legs are out men are gonna fucking sexualize you it's like yeah motherfucker that maybe is the problem that maybe is the problem don't you see that should not be a thing don't you see i as a woman should be able to wear whatever the fuck i want without there being a problem men get to wear these little shorty short shorts and run down the street without their shirt on and i maybe have my ankles out and i'm gonna get yelled at and sexualized girl we could be fully covered and we could still get sexualized that's the problem it's never what the girl is wearing it is always what people are doing and saying and thinking

about the girl period that's the problem so yeah honestly you probably dodged a fucking bullet and good for you for hearing this and going no no no no we're not playing these games not messing around with this mindset not worth it because when men get controlling about things like this it gets deeper they get more controlling they want more power they want you to feel like lesser of a person so then it's easier for them to get what they want out of the situation and that is just not okay for you mentally physically and your safety at all so props to you for getting the fuck out of here but if you as a woman ever hear these things said to you in a relationship i don't give a fuck how insecure your boyfriend is you should not be with an insecure man there is nothing that

pisses me off more than an insecure man because insecure man will take a beautiful amazing fantastic gorgeous woman and turn them into a shell of a person simply because they are also a shell of a person and that is not fair if you're an insecure insecure man leave people alone and work on that shit within yourself like please for the love of god i'm begging insecure men will take everything out on you any negative emotion they have they will take it out on you and i know this because i've dated this exact type of man and i should have left but i never regret the love i give you know i was young i didn't know any better sometimes you have to live through it to learn all right i'm not going to shame myself when we should be shaming the man but it's like they

really will see your spark and want to steal from it insecure men always go after confident women because they see that in them and they want that for themselves so if you find yourself in a situation where a man is demeaning you talking down on you pushing their insecurities on you oh well you shouldn't do this you can't wear that you shouldn't go there if you do that you know other people will this that and the other you shouldn't hang out with that person i don't like them trying to control you in any sort of way is not healthy i don't even care if they're a man insecure person at all you could be dating a woman nine non-binary i don't give a fuck insecure person period a healthy relationship is between two independent people and a health well or three

we talked about the the non-monogamy thing i don't give a fuck but it should be you know your partner supporting you and your individuality do i do things that probably make my boyfriend very you know self maybe self-conscious or overthinking like i post my whole life on the internet i'm running off to the ranch to go ride horses for like eight hours he doesn't see me for days it's like yeah sure but is he gonna take that out on me and try and demean me and control me and shut me down so i don't stop doing so i stop doing those things no he's gonna let me do them because if he wasn't happy with them he should leave period point blank and props to you for going no i'm not dealing with this and leaving because they would have stolen your shine and your sparkle

that i hear so thoroughly through your voice and you do not deserve that you dodged a god damn bullet but that's how it starts that's how the emotional manipulation starts oh no don't hang out with that friend i don't like them you should come hang out with me instead you know i really don't like the way that person like operates you shouldn't be around them no you shouldn't wear that because people are going to think this and that about you no why would you post online for other people's attention that's just like so this that and the other like no no actually don't comment on my life negatively at all if i was doing something bad and like actually bad and actually negative for me and you commented on it i would probably go hmm damn they have a point

like when i was a drug addict when my boyfriend met me and he's like hey babe maybe you shouldn't do molly at 9 a.m on a tuesday there was a part of me that went damn maybe he's fucking right and i hate saying that right that he's right but he's probably right there will always be a part of you that goes wow this is actually rational if that's not happening then it's not based in reality and those are his insecurities his emotions and his boundaries that he needs to work out within himself and go hmm do i actually maybe want to date a mormon who doesn't show their shoulders is that a boundary that i need to withhold within myself but you can't change other people it's kind of like that boundary boundary conversation we had in the last episode where you can have boundaries

and maybe they're intense maybe his boundaries are and i hate to say it women not showing their legs fucked up weird whatever he is not allowed to implement that on other people or change other people or control other people but he is allowed to go maybe i don't want to be with that person if they act this way do this thing whatever same thing with you i don't want a fucking boyfriend who's going to be upset my legs are out because he's an insecure little fucking bitch boy fantastic and that's your boundary and you held it and you broke up with him as you should okay never ever ever do i think a man should ever comment on what a woman is wearing i think that is a massive red flag a massive pinpoint on an insecure man and a dangerous person to be around

because like i said it's like he they it's like they almost get it they're almost awake they're almost cognizant where it's like well men are gonna sexualize your legs it's like that's the fucking problem and you're letting them by trying to control what i wear and feeding into that mindset weirdo freak oh no like this pisses me off don't even fucking get me started but i'm sorry you went through that that's just like it's no fun because it does take a toll on you it's very easy to go they're stupid but it's hard especially from somebody you love and somebody who you wanted to love and somebody who you want support from like that shit's gonna hurt so i'm so sorry you went through that please go buy all the booty shorts you possibly can have those legs out all

summer girl like in defiance of this love yourself nonetheless and don't let his insecure mindset that try and stop you from being who you are which is a beautiful wonderful amazing shining individual okay stay bright babe how do i not let myself get burnt out from work and have a life outside of it when i'm tired you're gonna have to do it tired you're gonna have to do it tired i know i know but guess what the thing is you have to live wait work to live not live to work the funny thing is society is set up for us to just like work until we are tired to the point where you have nothing else on your mind but work because guess what that makes good workers it makes good workers when all they can do is pay attention to work it makes good workers i'm not

gonna lie they have it figured out but does it also make them want to kill themselves yeah unfortunately that is called capitalism babe we do live in a capitalistic society yep yep yep anyways you knew that you work a job i actually i feel like at my other job or one of my other jobs when i'm working in public um a lot of the people who work at this job only work at this job and i don't mean like don't have a job outside of it i mean like that's all they do with their time they have about six hours in the day before that but guess what they don't do anything with it because they're tired they don't wanna they were up late they of late drinking and they didn't want to yeah so guess what now you're miserable now you hate work

and you hate me because i have a life outside of here okay and that's just a horrible awful miserable way to live you're gonna hate yourself you're gonna hate your work you're gonna hate your environment you're gonna hate going home you're gonna hate your co-workers who are happy go lucky and it's just like you cannot let society and the big corporations eat your soul alive you have to like live life tired out of spite you really do it is what it is my parents always had like a very flourishing life outside of work even though they were teachers and they were you know having to do other things outside of their eight hours they were working upwards of 9 12 hours a day five days a week plus weekends because my dad was a track coach so he was just like

gone all spring and summer so it was like they were busy busy busy busy but also they always made time for their hobbies they always made time for social events they always made time for this and that and were they fucking exhausted did i look into their eyes as an eight-year-old child and go wow they're tired yeah i did but also they don't really have any complaints about their life they don't they don't have any regrets they don't regret working they don't regret overworking themselves they don't regret anything from what i can tell they really don't and it's because they really just like push their life to the max the thing is it's like we can't control the society we're born into we know it's a capitalistic society we know we need to work

we know we need to work a lot to afford what we have especially in this economy some people are picking up extra jobs and people are picking up extra shifts we're overworking ourselves that's very much so true i wish it wasn't like that if i was in control of things it wouldn't be trust it's not my fault but you can not let them get to you okay you can live your life out of spite of it and i do think if we're given one life to live and these are the conditions we're given and it is what it is we can't do anything about it for now hopefully maybe one day we the society can revolt or whatever against it but if this is what the cards we are dealt you better play the best fucking hand you can and that means getting out there going out there and living life even if

you are tired it is what it is i know because what you want to be on your deathbed and go damn i only worked no you want to be like i worked and also i made time to play and that means yeah sometimes you're gonna have to like utilize your precious saturdays to hang out with your friends or you're gonna have to get off work tired and go to an activity on a thursday night it doesn't mean you have to do it every single day it doesn't mean you have to give up your rest days rest days are important there's balance in everything you don't have to do something every single day but if you feel called to do something if you feel called to try something even if it's an activity at home do it put the goddamn phone down and do it do it tired you will feel yeah tired but more

energized than you ever have been mentally because you are indulging in your passions and your passions are so important that's what keeps that spark in your soul alive okay you want that spark to dull and die out only work come home get on your phone go to sleep that's gonna kill you babe okay and i know this because i've done this for a long time i've done it for a long time same amount you have it's not a way to live you gotta indulge in your passions despite it all okay and not let them win you can't let them eat your soul alive you have to keep that spark alive and that's by indulging in your passions and indulging what you want to do with your free time even if it's not a lot even if it's not a lot do what you can for yourself like mondays are my long days let me

tell you what my mondays look like or my saturdays i'll tell you what my upcoming saturday is going to look like too so although this is work but not really because i love it it's still something i have to do with my time i wake up 7 a.m i go i ride i usually ride for about three hours not total but i'm out there it's like an hour drive hour drive hour lesson then i usually hang out for an hour then hour drive back home i get home i immediately turn on this goddamn camera sit down hang out with you guys i film for about two hours i edit after that for an hour by then it's about four o'clock all right i also get groceries on these days so then i get up i go i drive i get groceries i come home i unpack all the groceries by then it's 5 30 then i cook dinner then i have

usually like two hours of free time after dinner what's like seven to nine all right seven to nine sometimes i paint sometimes i'm cleaning the house sometimes i'm doing nothing scrolling my phone sometimes i am having those little days where i'm doing nothing that's okay but am i exhausted by the end of the day yes did i do a million fucking things yes did i indulge my passions yes am i tired but happy yes absolutely saturday okay let's say i work a more traditional job that you may think of um I work at the restaurant on Saturday well this Saturday I'm actually volunteering at this like cross-country horse race that's going on so I gotta be up at six I gotta show up to the horse race to go help take vitals and just be at the checkpoints I gotta be there from like

6 to 2 30 yeah free volunteer hours I'm not even gonna be on a horse I'm just there because I want to see it I want to know what's going on I'm curious about the you know community and the environment i'm volunteering my time then i have to drive an hour home i have a 30 minute window to change clothes and then i go and work an eight hour shift until about 1 a.m yeah yeah did i have to volunteer those hours did i have to show up and do those passions no could i've just sat around my house and done nothing before that shift yes absolutely i know i'm gonna be bonkers tired by the end of that day but i'm gonna feel fulfilled i'm gonna feel inspired and i'm gonna have a little cash in my pocket and what's better than that work to live not live to work hey pookie

any advice on loosening up and not being so serious about life oh this is probably a good question for i guess the past topic i will i struggle with this a lot because my parents are very like serious individuals like i said they have a good balance in life but they're also like as parents of me anytime i bring something up going on in life they have like a million questions for me they have a million doubts for me they have a bunch of opinions that they want to put on me and it has made me in my adult years a very self-conscious serious person where I've become hypercritical of myself hypercritical of the world around me and hypercritical of other people and not like in an external way where I'm just like a mean bitch but in a way where I'm like damn

chill the fuck out you know like chill out like it is truly not that serious and so I've really been working on that honestly I feel like I started working on that last September-ish I went on a really good girls trip when I was like wow the like like nothing matters in the best way possible other than just like being around your girls cooking a good dinner being outside and doing what you can to live life to the fullest and so since then I really have just like tried to rein in my emotions in a way that I felt was like preferential to me in a very healthy way where it's like you worrying about something is not helping the situation if it's something that doesn't need to be worried about you being anxious about a situation that doesn't need to be anxious

about because it's just gonna fuck it up you don't need to waste your energy on that thing you being angry about something you being upset about something you feeling ticked off about something whatever it is like negative emotion wise being a little too serious if it is not worth it in that situation then you are just wasting that energy wasting that emotion and you know also like keeping the world at an arm's distance and that's not fair to you and it's not fair to the people around you and it's not fair to the world around you you know I think I do flow and exist better when I'm light-hearted and just bouncing around bubbly enjoying life and it takes work to kind of get to that nonchalant peaceful mindset but the work it does take is always so

worth it and it really is like the work really is just me challenging my negative emotions and by challenging I mean asking myself when I'm in those moods whatever mood it may be is this a productive use of my energy I could be using the same amount of energy that I am on this negative emotion on a positive emotion so is it worth is it worth worth being pissed off is it worth being angry is it worth being upset no the answer usually is always no sometimes people piss me off and i'm like actually no that really hurt my soul and i need to like sit in this emotion and think about it and think about my relationship with this person but that happens very rarely very rare but giving myself the space to really ask myself like bitch is it worth your time is

it worth your energy if you think about your energy as like physical dollars physical money is it worth shelling that out or is it like damn i don't need to be wasting that that it's that's a real question i ask myself multiple times a day and if the answer is no which it usually is no i'll redirect something more positive or really it is just the affirmation of like that's not worth my time and i need to hold myself to a higher standard i need to hold my emotions to a higher standard i need to hold myself worth to a higher standard and that means not letting that thing in my bubble i really do have like a very large emotional bubble if you imagine yourself like a like a force field around you a bubble it's like things will approach you energy will

approach you situations will approach you and you have a choice whether you let that thing in or not by giving it approval to enter sure you can have a snap judgment snap feeling someone will cut me off in traffic i'll be like that dumb fucking bitch like you know i can have that initial feeling but I have to give it permission to get closer by feeding in more energy or I can go nah it is not worth it and push it away keep it out of my bubble that's really how I have started to view it and it has helped me process in real time understand what is worth my emotions and what's not which also helps me then be in better situations have better relationships with people make better connections because i'm not taking shit so serious i'm just living life hoping to

put out the best possible interactions that i can i also think when it comes to not taking life so serious the same thing about force fielding um negative emotions i don't think you should withhold your positive emotions i think when you withhold your positive emotions that is taking life too serious and i freely give my positive energy out i understand some days maybe i'm not I don't have as much energy to give out but I am one who's like always trying to like put the best foot forward give positive energy out smile wave at my neighbors whatever it may be because that makes just life in general better and makes it feel less serious for me personally so I do like to always approach in a positive tone and the negativity that approaches me I ask myself is

this shit worth my time is it worth my money the answer is no great i'm moving on and that's how you should really take there's some demons out there that are going to try and get on your nerves though you have to be aware of them okay they want in your bubble don't let them in your bubble finances same age as you and wondering how you get by girl one day at a time one day at a time you know i feel like just because i'm on camera posting a lot online because sometimes i think this way about people I follow too where I'm like oh they're doing a brand deal or oh they're doing this or they're doing that they must have money that ain't true that ain't true at all okay um I have always been somebody who like get who works like eight different random jobs so I've never had

a steady income I've never had like the weekly paychecks that are the same well I have in the past and that was really fucking nice with benefits oh the dream that's the dream never had any of that okay I have always worked odd jobs or have been recently have been working odd jobs weird you know sometimes I have income this month sometimes I don't have any income and it really is just like one day at a time babe to be fair I don't know anybody my age who is like feeling financially secure and by I mean feeling financially secure not worried about where I go next with money in my mind financial security is okay I have enough that's how I view financial security or I'm getting enough where I feel good I see my parents they are that way but they weren't

always that way that's like what they took 45 years to get that way but it was saving it was you know cutting out on spending it was really kind of scrounging around a little bit but eventually you can't get there but that wasn't something that they were going to have in their 20s it wasn't something they were going to have in their 30s or even their 40s they would have a little money for vacation here and there for like new clothes for us here and there if we outgrew it to pay for the vehicles we had and food and that's about it i have realized though that the more I worry about it the less I feel like I have and that's a sticky situation to be in because yes of course you need to like pay bills and that is something that you're gonna

worry about I get that that's something we all worry about that's something I worry about but you also have to have like this adult innate trust of like I'll figure it out I'll figure it out We'll get there. We'll figure it out. We'll pick up a third job if we need to. It doesn't fucking matter. We'll figure it out. We will be okay. And that mentality has saved me a lot of financial stress. Okay. Putting my money in a little 401k, putting my money in a little Roth IRA, you know, small little investments here and there, not going out to eat all the goddamn time, cooking from home trying to limit my shopping cutting down here and there where I can being aware of my spending it saves me a lot honestly and it does set me up for success but I understand

that's not going to be an overnight success I feel like money is a long haul game coming from no money okay it is really like a long game that you play so it's okay if you need time to get there don't stress yourself out because you're not a millionaire at 22 there's not a lot of millionaires at 22 okay i'm gonna be honest with you so if you're just an average person with average money congratulations at least you're not you know really struggling you know really really hurting at least you have a like i think about it like think i have a roof over my head my ac kind of works i got a car that runs i'm happy you know i don't ask for a lot but i appreciate what i have i take care of what i have and i know at the end of the day no matter what i'll figure

it out money flows money flows easily flows naturally the more you hold on to it tightly like spiritually if you hold hold hold hold the more restricted you're gonna feel the more restricted your flow is gonna be you want it to really flow like a river give take don't be afraid to give don't be afraid to take pay attention to where it's going why it's going be aware but also it's like it's not worth the stress on me mentally because i know no matter what we'll get it figured out even if i'm negative i'm a goddamn million i'll get it figured i'll go bankrupt if i need to take another credit card just kidding don't do that don't do that none of this is financial advice but I do know if you are a young person and you're like damn this is hard the money game

is hard we're all feeling that way so you're not alone what is your next big dream oh this is a fun question because it's something I've I've been thinking about a lot recently because I don't know I'm about to turn 27 my Saturn return is occurring my Saturn return is returning if you don't repeat the pattern the pattern is doomed to repeat you know you're always faced that question and it's something I'm being faced with right now where it's like all right bitch it's time to grow it's time to grow and I am like doing little things to help myself grow but also I'm starting to think big picture where it's like where do I want to be what do I want to settle down with and if I could explain my dream to you which I think I've kind of fleshed out really well it would be

which is so silly because I never thought I would be doing this but I think it would bring me so much fun and peace some of my favorite things to do are go to local farms whether it's um going to my local barn and doing horseback riding they do like girl scout camp boy scout camp they do rides on the weekends they have border horses like they own stables I also love going to farms they have like like little petting areas like goats and sheep and chickens you can kind of like go out and explore and pretend you're in the country I love going to farms where they have like you pick berries and you pick flowers and I love the idea of like the gentle barn in LA where it's like an animal rescue and you can go and you know get some animal therapy I think animals are

fantastic for therapy especially horses I love being in nature I love painting I love artistry i also i'm just like naturally a business woman i i like to work for myself and i like to create things from the ground up so i think my personal personal dream because i thought like oh i could work for somebody else and do this i could be a ranch manager and do this but i think i just like want my own ranch i really do do i know if i wanted to be in kansas do i want to be in missouri do i want to be in wisconsin do i want it to be in baltimore do i want it to be in california don't want to be in oregon who knows that's why i say a lot i have more exploring to do um but i do think my dream environment would be having a ranch you know having some horses

either doing like trail rides local trail rides um having a barn petting little barn you know doing maybe like a you pick flowers something where like the community can escape and I have an oasis that they can escape to that would be more of like um a hobby if I had to guess what I'm actually gonna like make money from what my real dream is like money wise it would probably be selling oil paintings um I've been working hard on those I haven't shared a lot because I've just been practicing and I love kind of keeping my practice to myself and just like keeping that um journey personal i think there's something very um beautiful about that don't worry i will start sharing it soon you will eventually see it but i do think i will eventually intertwine the two

where it's like i have animals i have a farm i have a place for people to escape the same way this podcast is literally a place for people to escape and also just painting as much as i possibly can on the side if i'm around animals in nature and painting those three things if i have those three things life's worth living and that is maybe a simple dream but it's my dream and anybody's dream can be their own but that's kind of what I've been envisioning for myself more so now than ever there's this ranch out in Malibu that I've kind of really been following and loving their journey of just having horses and taking people on trail rides and getting people out in nature I think it's so beautiful and wonderful um and the more people I can introduce that to

the better honestly so yeah I do think I see this country side of myself going far do I know where or when or how no but I do know that when I get a vision it's so funny we have this power within ourselves to like envision our dreams and truly make them a reality but I do have this like go getter attitude where if I have a vision and I want it to come true if I truly want it to come true I will get it done I will get it done so I have that belief in myself I have the understanding myself I have the patience in myself and right now I'm just putting in the work because the work is more important than the destination can ever be if you put in the work you will always get to the destination of your dreams as long as you're willing to take the journey towards it no matter

what it is the work is always worth it I think some people think oh the work is hard I want to give up and that's yeah you can but also you never will accomplish your dreams i think about my friend who's like becoming practically a doctor that is a shit ton of fucking work and that's work that i find so challenging because like i just am not innately in tune with she probably thinks the work i do with horses and painting is so insanely challenging because she could never do it well quote unquote could never do it i don't believe in people not being able to do it but you know it's so different from what she's doing i think about the work people put in with businesses the work people put in with their children the work people put in with anything they have that's

regarding their dream it is always worth the work because it will get you one step 10 step 40 steps closer to your dream and that dream will become a reality you have to have belief in that and the work is just what gets you there so the work is always worth it in my opinion i'm always been a hard worker i really have i used to be lazy and then i realized damn life's boring when you're lazy it really is and i don't mind a little sweat i don't mind a little dirt i don't mind a little grit I don't mind huffing oil paint fumes actually I do that shit hurts my head but the practice the time the appreciation it'll all be worth it because I know it'll get me exactly where I want to go but with that being said what a good Tuesday I feel like this was a fun episode I hope you guys

enjoyed as much as I did I need more call-ins if you want to submit a call-in um dm me on instagram at hannah marlene if it doesn't let you in the first time dm me like hey girl I want to and a call in it'll let you the second time and also keep in mind audio quality because I get a lot of call-ins that the audio quality is just not good enough to make out most of what you're saying and I do apologize but I have to be able to understand I have to be able to translate that to this podcast so keep that in mind and I want to hear from you guys I love your beautiful voice I love your beautiful stories and I love hearing from you guys but if you want to submit your regular questions even like a longer one you can always dm me um and i post the questioner every

sunday on instagram if you want to support me see extra content every single day patreon.com slash smoke says shawty i answer every single question there so if you're like hannah you never get to my questions literally every single week i answer every question and i do long episodes i really do go in depth to make sure you get the answer you deserve many more fun things coming there i gotta upload a tarot reading today and watch the vlogs coming out pretty much weekly on youtube at hannah marlene 444 but with that being said stay sane stay sexy and i'll see you all so soon