Smoke Sesh - go with the flow, negative people & the purpose of life (video episode)

Episode Date: February 29, 2024

Hello hotties and happy Thursday! So excited to be back with another fun lil video episode for you all. Today we catch up a little bit but jump right into my frustrations and emphasis on going with the flow, control freak, chill out, adult skills, get through it, do better, it’ll all work out, what’s the purpose of life, break up with your boyfriend, smoke with me, honey moon phase, rose colored glasses, famous birthdays, going makeup free & makeup addiction, whose advice should I trust? real angel run ins, LA story times, psychic abilities, intuition and trusting your gut, older female figures in your life, living with your grandma, sleeping schedules & why routine is important, we’re just grown children, summer plans, negative people, constant drama, trying your best, talking sh!t, consuming yourself with other peoples lives, escapism, how to not be so negative, gratuity and finding the good things, medication dissociation, just try! health anxiety and getting older, symptoms of adulthood, free bleeding and much much much much more! If you liked today's episode and want to see more join the pattern.com/smokeseshshawty and submit all your questions to the instagram.com/hannahmarlene Love you! Have a safe and wonderful weekend and I'll see you all next week! MUAH!

listen everybody needs a fairy godmother you know just somebody to look out for them some people call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sash so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all hotties of the world welcome back to another beautiful amazing incredible wonderful episode and hang out on smoke sesh i'm so excited to be back with you guys you know i got ready i did my little wavy mermaid hair i put on my hot little cheetah print and i was like this outfit is gonna to eat and you know what it does for the audio listeners i'm wearing this cute little button-up

cheetah print top and these cute little denim blue jeans very simple very lovely and then i sat my ass in this giant cheetah print chair that is quite frankly the exact cheetah print i'm wearing and it looks like i'm in a green screen it looks like i'm green screening cheetah print all over me so sorry if the outfit's not eating per usual but we're here and we're gonna make it work because that's what life's about anyways i love you all i hope you enjoyed tuesday's episode it's funny the episodes that i think i'm like not giving enough in or my brain is just disconnected from my body and my mouth and my train of thought those are some of the best episodes those are the ones where i get the most dms that are like oh my god girl thank you for saying that or that

was amazing that was such a fun episode and I'm like wow I don't even remember what I said like I don't have any clue what was happening not in a sense where like I don't care but sometimes like I just get on this crazy train of thought where I just go and I go and I go and I explore and then I clock back into reality and I forget everything I just said maybe it's the weed maybe it's the dissociates it and maybe it's the anxiety disorder that makes me dissociate who knows that's a question for my therapist but anyways all i care about is if you like it and you enjoyed it so i'm glad you guys did i hope you've had a great week um hopefully the universe is treating you well i think there's some crazy stuff happening in the stars right now um which i'm going to talk about

a little bit on my patreon um if you want to know some astrology updates or how to handle a little bit of the chaos but a little pro tip for you all is just we gotta learn to go with the flow okay life tip number one from hannah we haven't even dove into any questions but just something i want to talk about we gotta learn to go with the flow i was listen i'm the biggest fucking control freak ever first of all i'm the biggest freak ever but freak as in control freak freak as in i have a hard time letting go freak as in change no thank you freak as in i have a certain way of thinking about things and doing things in a certain order and if it goes outside that order i'm gonna lose my mind maybe a little ocd anyways one of the best adult habits that i had to learn how to deal with

mostly through trials and tribulations which i don't think anybody should have to go through so let me just tell you what i learned so you don't have to face the trauma yourself but the best thing you can do the best adult skill you can develop young is learning to go with the fucking flow okay learning to not only chill the fuck out but also keep going through it okay we are all gonna face moments where it's like what the fuck just happened we are all gonna face moments where it's like that is not what i expected that is not what i wanted that is not what I was desiring or trying to bring into my life whatsoever. This is not a problem that I wanted to deal with. This is not something that I was planning for whatsoever. When those moments

happen, you got two choices. Previously in life, I thought it was only one choice and it was freak out, cry, scream, roll on the ground, rip your hair out, go into a depressive episode for six months and refuse to change or do better. And then I learned there was a second option, which is oh sometimes we can be better for these things sure they're not how we wanted but if we build an inherent trust in ourselves and our desire to want more and do better it's it's all gonna work out in the end we have no choice but to make this work out no choice but to do better no choice but to get on the right fucking path so let's chill out and realize sometimes things aren't going to go exactly how you want that's okay but we have no choice but to

take a deep breath and keep moving forward so pro tip learn to go with the flow the best you can especially during this pisces season where we're having mental breakdowns left and right sometimes you just got to have the mental breakdown i tweeted this the other day and i thought it was a banger tweet and only got like three likes and i was like damn no one else gets this but i love the empty-headed like serve you give yourself in the mirror after a good scream cry i love the like you know puffy red eyes glow and then you just hit like a in the mirror you just hit like a kissy face wink combo and you feel like the baddest bitch on this planet you gotta go through it you gotta go with the flow you gotta make the best of this

situation okay you'll get through it i believe in you universe do not send me any more lessons i am good i love you i love you universe but i am not your strongest soldier i am not there's only so much i can put up with anyways go with the flow you got to learn sometimes things are not as serious as you want them to be some things are serious but we gotta not take them so seriously in order to survive it's a fine balance that I would recommend everybody learns young rather than old change is necessary if you are not changing you simply are not living it's really all I have to catch you up on today it's a beautiful day out here in Kansas City it is sunny and like 78 I am ready to get outside to go live my best hot girl life sit in the sunshine realize

life is good but we gotta get through this podcast first actually I am getting quite a bit of sunlight for my giant windows right now it's pretty nice um shout out to her miss sunshine love you girl but i know why you guys are here i'm glad you enjoyed tuesday's episode i'm glad i could do that for you and give you guys a fun little sesh hang out but i was only able to get through probably like one fourth of your guys's questions you guys submitted a lot of questions this week and thank you I love you I got like like 4,000 responses that is insane and obviously I will not be able to get to all of them but I will try and intuitively pick as many as I can when you guys are wondering how I pick questions usually it's just like if my brain triggers a

response I'm gonna say it or if I feel like questions people are popping up with the same questions over and over and over again um i will try and um like if i see the same question a bunch of times in one week i'll try and answer those because i feel like that's kind of the collective looking for an answer and i really try to intuitively lean into what we're talking about so if you guys are ever wondering how i pick it is really all intuition the purpose of life and my purpose what the fuck are we doing on earth your purpose is to have fun i know you're like what Hannah that is not it literally is like if you want to know the most simple aspect of what it is to be alive and to have this have the honor of having this human experience it is to have as

much fun as you possibly can when I say fun fun is always rooted in a healthy place fun is always rooted in a uplifting place fun is always rooted in a place where it is coming from understanding peace trust good positive energy okay because i think a lot of fun that people think about is like oh i'm gonna go do as many drunks as i possibly can in the span of a weekend no that's not what i'm talking about sure that can be fun and that can be a part of your life experience but when I talk about fun I talk about being alive is about leaning towards the things that bring you joy and not demeaning yourself from that joy and not demeaning yourself from life's true pleasures allowing yourself to enjoy a good meal with good friends allowing yourself

to build those friendships that are going to last a lifetime that you're going to have so much fun through allowing yourself to go down maybe the harder path but the one that you know is ideal for you allowing yourself to live your life for yourself life is about having fun okay and sure there's going to be hardships there's going to be trials there's going to be tribulations it's not going to be sunshine rainbows all the time but that doesn't mean you're still not living your life in accordance of that fun like oh you want to be um a doctor that doesn't sound fun to me but like vibes you want to be a doctor that's your fun or maybe you want to be an art student that's your fun you know that's your true life's path you know that is what's going to bring you

the most joy in this life um literally anything insert your ideal life here you're gonna have to go through classes that maybe aren't the funnest you're gonna have to get certifications that aren't gonna be fun you're gonna have to devote time that isn't gonna be the funnest but at the end of the day you're working your way towards what is your true life's path what is going to be the most fun for you in the long run so there is going to be hardships there's gonna be trials there's gonna be tribulations but ultimately you are still on the right path towards fun that is what life is about life is about choosing yourself choosing what is best for you living in accordance to what is your gut feelings and your gut instincts and not taking yourself away from

what you think is best for you and living yourself in accordance to fun i feel like that's kind of how i see it um and you're like oh i don't know how i have fun it is it comes from the simple things maybe you don't know what you want to do like with your life like you don't know who you want to be you're like the um job you want to take on that's okay but you still know what brings you joy maybe what brings you joy is reading your book in the sunshine with your cat living peacefully maybe your joy is cooking for your friends and your family maybe your joy is literally going on a walk around the park maybe your fun in life is decorating your home maybe your fun in life is knitting maybe your fun in life is puzzling literally it doesn't have to be so big a lot

of the times the things that truly make your life worth living and truly make your life a life are going to be the small things and surrounding yourself by the small things that bring you joy are ultimately going to make it easier for you to focus on the big things that bring you joy as well and decide on those a little easier um but yeah what is life about literally girl live life have fun go experience go enjoy go try that's all it's about oh my god someone said hannah i greened out last night on nowadays i thought i was dying but i feel more insightful sometimes it takes a hardship unintentionally for you to realize that there is good in this world and that life is worth living you know you know when you hit that like edible spot where you're like whoa i'm overthinking

everything but also everything is good and i am like it's like the eye of the storm i'm in the calm of the storm and i can see everything for what it is um and you feel a little bit more calm after it sometimes you have a healthy green out and that's what you experience sometimes you green out like me and then i stopped smoking for a year the there's no in between but yeah nowadays the drink that i was telling you guys about that shit hits me like a train like my edible last night i usually eat like a little gummy and it takes me about an hour for it to kick in which is normal that's how long it should take a gummy to kick in because you your body has to digest it metabolize it distribute it throughout your body okay for it to reach your brain it's gonna take

a while but with the liquid it your body doesn't have to digest it it just goes straight to your bloodstream straight to your brain and it kind of hits you like crazy i can only have one drink on nowadays before i'm like i need to go lay down this is a fantastic option for those of you who maybe don't drink alcohol um but want to have like a little drink with your friends and kind of get that same buzz nowadays is perfect literally not sponsored um oh i do think i have a code for you guys i always ask for a code if i like something i'll try and get you guys a discount i think it was like all capital hannah m 15 fingers crossed if that's not it it's definitely in another podcast sorry um someone said just started the pilates one week plan from madeline a bead and i feel

so good thank you so much i love her she's the only pilates girly that i can really follow or keep up with especially because she makes it very beginner friendly um but madeline a bead a few of you guys were asking me who i watch on youtube when it comes to uh pilates what videos i do i live and die by her workout plans um she has anything from like five minutes to 45 minutes i have not worked my way up to 45 minutes quite yet um as consistently but if you stick to her like month-long plan um and also like one week plan it's very easy for you to get into as a beginner so shout out to her for making working out available for every type of person um at any beginner stage someone said i finally broke up with my boyfriend and i'm so much happier

cheers girl should we smoke to that me looking for any excuse anytime my friends say something good to me i'm like shot joint how we celebrating and it comes from a place of love but i'm now realizing how that could be unhealthy but it's always me just wanting to celebrate and enjoy so let's celebrate and enjoy cheers to you dumping your lame ass loser fucking boyfriend and moving on with your life like the bad bitch you are because we are not accepting anything but the best for the rest of the summer okay it is spring we are blooming we are blossoming we are coming to fruition and we are not taking with us lame men into our future realize realize realize anyways i don't really have like a ashtray but i do have a planter next to me so i hope that will

work just the same let's light up a few of you guys have asked me for recommendations on um somebody that has good cbd other than paz packs because you guys know i've worked with paz packs for years and they went out of business recently and i wish i had a recommendation i simply don't thus this is me asking you for your recommendations on your favorite cbd brands or pre-roll uh cbd brands um because shout out to them they sent me this ginormous box i'm talking huge box of product um so i'm just like a squirrel stashing away my favorite cbd products and smoking them every once in a while um but yeah i know that at some point i am going to run out and i'm going to have a mentee mentee b so if you have any recommendations please let me know

anyways oh no i smashed it i want you guys to get the asmr legendary is here with bet mgm sportsbook sign up to unlock access to hundreds of pre-match and live betting options for all your favorite sports. Download the BetMGM app. See BetMGM.com for terms. 18 plus Alberta only. Please play responsibly. Subject to eligibility requirements. If gambling is affecting your mental health or well-being, 2-1-1 Alberta

is here to help. Call or text 2-1-1 or visit ab.211.ca. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with the Alberta iGaming Corporation. Standard message and data rates may apply. The ASMR of it all. also stoner pro tip if you have plants plants love bong water they live for it i don't know why someone tell me if they know all i know is do not pour your bong water down your sink

or your toilet just pour it right into your planter these plants go crazy for it you have an ashtray pour your ashes into your planter pro tip for all my girlies anyways someone said how to get used to the honeymoon phase being over in a relationship i think a relationship actually starts once the honeymoon phase ends because the rose-colored glasses come off and you realize holy shit who the fuck is in front of me and either that's a very scary thought thus breakup that's not the right person for you or it's a very comforting thought thus it's the right person for you but literally i think the relationship the relationship truly begins when those rose-colored glasses come off when you can actually see that person for who

they are when you actually start maybe getting in little small fights when you realize how you communicate when you realize maybe you move in together how you guys live together um your dynamic there um when you actually start getting to know each other in that sense and you're not putting on this performance that is the honeymoon phase which is i need to be the best version of me so they only see that so they want to date me which that's a very normal part of a relationship and everybody's going to want to be their best versions for their partner that they're dating but we truly don't get to know each other until we see the deepest darkest parts of ourselves and sometimes the deepest darkest parts of ourselves are not the hottest like i love my

boyfriend because he sees me at my lowest like naked sobbing pussy on the hard tile floor sobbing and he's still like i love her though i'm gonna go give her a little forehead kiss i see my boyfriend spiraling because he's a scorpio and scorpio men are crazy listen but also valid like i get the craziness it's a little bit of obsession based me too girl um and i'm like oh you know what he's saying is fucking crazy but also i love him and he's spiraling and i still love him for it you know what i mean once the rose colored glasses come off and you exit the honeymoon phase that's when the real relationship begins i do think a lot of people uh exit the honeymoon phase and then they're like who the

fuck am i dating and if you are having that realization and you don't like the person who they are in front of you who they are raw real unwrapped okay chaos if you can't handle that I don't think that's the right partner for you which also if they can't handle you in that phase or they're mad at you about things that you're just being human for or they're mad at you about things that you know you're not masking or you're not behaving correctly if they can't handle you get rid of them okay if they want you to behave a certain way for the entirety of that relationship get rid of them that's not how it works that's not how it's gonna work you're gonna be miserable free yourself your partner should see you at your very very worst and love

you like they are seeing you at your best it really is that simple the honeymoon phase is fun and stuff you're in your like crush psychosis you're like living your best life you're like the two best versions of yourself possible but that true real love does not build until you see each other for what you truly are and that is a flawed human being individual and you love each other no matter what you love each other through that you love each other for your flaws for the mistakes you've made for every single aspect about yourself and they forgive you and they love you through that that's true love that's when that true true true everlasting love kicks in um and i think it is so much more addicting feeling that love than it is feeling that um crush psychosis

honeymoon phase that is like a quick hit of dopamine whereas the um you know long-term love feeling is more of a fulfilling dopamine hit a long-term dopamine hit shouts out my poor boyfriend I feel so bad he loves me for every aspect of myself I'm like when I record these I'm like it's a girl's day I need you out of the house so I can record and his ass is like yes I hear you you gotta work I gotta leave fantastic he texts me he's like can I come home and have lunch I was like I'm 20 minutes into the podcast give me give me another 40 babe I love you oh my god someone said I don't know if you know this but you've reached having a famous birthday profile level I recently realized this because I was um I was like collecting information to put on my website

so I was just googling my name and you know the usual is popping up like tiktok videos instagram posts whatever my uh merch website and then famous birthdays popped up and I was like I don't have a famous birthdays account like I never submitted for one I don't know I do someone made me one i don't know if i have it in at famous birthdays or one of you guys submitted me but illy go upvote my famous birthdays go check me out i don't remember what information is on there so i don't remember if it's correct um but yeah isn't that crazy i never thought i'd be on famous birthdays such a niche way of me being like okay people are aware of my presence because famous birthdays what who actually uses that but if you remember watching tana mojo at

like 14 years old she always was shouting out her famous birthdays which I think is hilarious because it's such a niche site but apparently I'm a famous birthday all I really care about my birthday is I share it with Marilyn Monroe which I think makes a lot of sense tips for being able to walk around with no makeup um you just have to stop wearing makeup I think listen I was the girl who would wake up and then glue giant fake eyelashes on my face and do a full beat before leaving the house for like a year and a half that was also my most insecure year and that was probably the year where I was having the hardest time relationship wise with myself and that's because I felt like I was just masking too much of myself I was putting on too much of a performance

and then I hit this this part of my life where I was like you know what fuck it I am tired of putting on this facade and not enjoying it like I'm just gonna be real and raw and then I didn't wear makeup for like six months no makeup no hair curling nothing like that and it kind of brought me down to base level and reminded me like what I looked like without makeup and knowing that it's okay and not being fearful of who you truly are and it was a great practice to implement into my life so if you feel like you have the urge to wear too much makeup or to cover yourself in any sort of way and like no hate to makeup it is a great tool like to artistically express yourself and I love a little winged eyeliner moment on me personally I love blush like I love doing my makeup

but if you feel like you need to cover yourself I feel like that's something that you should work on and the best thing to do to kind of break that um connection in your brain of needing to do this behavior is to stop doing it completely like go sober from makeup allow yourself to be seen allow yourself to show yourself um and it's gonna be scary at first it's gonna feel weird you're gonna feel like everybody's looking at you but fact of the matter is nobody's ever thinking about you as much as you're thinking of yourself nobody is ever looking at you as much as you're looking at yourself so find peace in that practice practice practice but yeah now i can't even stand the thought of a fake eyelash like I'll do my makeup but also I feel just as confident in my

makeup as I do without my makeup now and it really took me just going cold turkey and frankly getting used to seeing myself again um for me to build that relationship back up to a healthy place so sometimes hey we have our vices but if you feel like it's a vice that's giving you a negative effect sometimes you just got to cut it out of your life real oh this is interesting there's so much contract oh god i'm gonna butcher this word contradictory i don't know why that was so hard for me to read listen to tuesday's episode where i talk about doing way too much mushrooms and killing my fucking brain anyways to understand why i can't read that word oh there's so much contradictory life advice out there how to decide who's advice to trust um that's a good question

I think it comes from a place of inspiration if it inspires you into a healthy version of yourself then I think it's good advice I don't think there's anybody who's like more qualified or less qualified um the best life advice I have ever gotten has come from people that I don't even know that I randomly ran into and got to chat with um they haven't always been from like licensed therapist life coach spiritualist like it comes from every direction that you look it comes from anywhere and I think as long as it inspires you into a better version of yourself or into a healthy place then it is ultimately good life advice and maybe something that you should listen to I think there's a lot of people out there that also spew advice um and if it makes you feel bad

about yourself or if it makes you feel bad about other people or kind of put you into a egotistical place then I don't necessarily think it's good life advice thinking of like the Andrew Tate's of the world who it's all ego ego ego put other people down in order to lift yourself up that's not good life advice don't I don't suggest that but if it's coming from a place where it's like we're all equal and you deserve to be equal as well and you deserve to feel powerful in yourself and support and uplift yourself as long as other as well as other people that's when I'm like okay valid I should maybe listen to what they have to say but yeah I think life advice and the most important life advice comes from people that you never would have fucking expected I remember going

to LA for the first time with my boyfriend and we ended up at a skate park and our usual routine is he goes and skates I'm not a skater girl I will never be a skater girl I'm not gonna pretend to be somebody I'm not okay you put me on a pair of fucking skates or a skateboard and I'm losing my two front teeth maybe an arm who knows I accept that I'm not gonna pretend and be somebody I'm not I'm not a skater girl I can't I can't I can't rollerblade I can't beat her shout out to the girls who are that shit is insane but I'm gonna sit my ass on a little bench I'm gonna sit my ass on a blanket with my pens and colored pencils and I'm gonna color I'm gonna draw I'm gonna journal you know that's more so my vibe so I was doing that and he was out skating and there's like a

law in LA that you cannot skate without a helmet so the park lady came out and she's older she's probably like 50 60 she came out she's like hey you gotta like not to harass you but you gotta put on like a helmet or whatever and we were visiting so we don't have a helmet my boyfriend's like what do I do and she was like you know what let's go check the lost and found she got him padded up with a helmet from the lost and found knee pads it was so funny and then she just sat down next to me and we started chatting and we talked about her life and everything that she did and she just gave me so much advice on taking advantage of the now and listening to yourself and uplifting yourself through the now and it was such eye-opening like advice and experience and

from a place that I never would have thought of looking and it was amazing it was incredible it really made me take like accountability for my life and lean more towards the fun life advice why are you alive you're alive here to have fun to enjoy life to follow your greatest passions and anybody who makes you feel bad about that is ultimately maybe not a good person for you or maybe has ulterior motives that doesn't mean you have to listen to them you know but I think everybody is able to give good advice it just depends on where it's stemming from is it stemming from a place of actual uplifting and supporting or is it stemming from a place of ego and putting other people down while uplifting yourself someone asked me if I have psychic

abilities and i hate to get in my own head here and say yes but genuinely i have had some pretty intense psychic moments recently i don't know if it's the pisces season energy and my pisces rising really just coming together um or if it's just i've garnered trust and intuition within myself but I do think having psychic abilities spiritual abilities are a real thing and before you're like okay have we lost our minds here how much weed have you smoked what are you on I want to explain where I think psychic abilities come from or just like spiritual abilities come from I think that kind of understanding comes from a understanding and a overwhelming understanding not only in yourself but also the world around you you see everything for what it is you see

yourself for what it is there is no lying to yourself believing fake situations um giving in to fake narratives it is simply just knowing the truth and understanding it as the truth um and i think specifically like psychic connection being able to predict the future things like that come from trusting in your gut instincts and listening to them um they come from giving into your intuitive senses and connecting with them listening to them and moving in accordance to and I feel like I've had so many more of these experiences recently because I've been less afraid and more willing to just listen to what the truth is and understand my truth have trust in myself to understand that have trust in myself to do the right thing

um to make the hard decision if I need to and it is a really nice feeling it's a very nice feeling it is a nice change of pace because I feel like when I was constantly like overthinking in the sense of weighing too many options and giving too much weight to things that simply don't matter and you know looking too much outside myself rather than in myself for the answer I felt so lost and so disconnected from myself and it's crazy how i'm like oh my god now i have super powers now that i can literally simply just listen to what is good for me and make changes accordingly and trust my gut and know what i truly want to do it's crazy that i'm like no i've developed psychic powder powers but i think that's honestly what that is of course it's like

more supernatural things we're like seeing ghosts or talking to dead people i think there's also some realism to that do i think those people are actually seeing people in front of them like visually no but i do think there is an inherent value in being able to connect to different energies whether it's with yourself or with other people um or with past energies but psychic abilities truly come from trusting your gut and knowing yourself if you know yourself you'll be able to know anything so if you're looking for the answer from somebody and you're not gonna you're not gonna listen to me listen to yourself you know what you want you know what you desire you know what it takes to go after it the only person standing in the way of it is you also can

we talk about people who've lived with their grandma before people like I don't know why this is like a such a common theme but when I meet people and they're like oh yeah I had to live my grandma for a little bit I'm like you are one of the toughest bitches I know I love you I trust people also who had to live with their grandma more than anybody else because it means you like lived through something either maybe your parents couldn't take care of you you go to grandma's house maybe you don't have a house anymore you go to grandma's house maybe you fall flat on your ass you have nowhere else to go you go to grandma's house if you go to grandma's house other than just like a visit and you like live there it means you've gone through something and it means you

like know that life has trials and tribulations and unfortunately you probably face them young but every time i talk to someone and i'm getting to know them and if they say they lived in my grandma at their grandma's house i'm like i trust you bitch i do literally that was like one of the things that mean like my boyfriend i he was like no i had to live with my grandma for a bit and i was like we can get along my parents little parent trauma for you all um when i was in college they randomly decided we're gonna sell our house and you're like girl you're in college you should be paying for your own apartment well it was freshman year and freshman year there's no over the summer dorms and i don't have money because i'm working a 7.95 an hour job hello

can we raise the minimum wage um and i have lived with no one else but my parents before and they're like yeah we're gonna sell our house and we're gonna go on a cross-country road trip and we're just gonna live out of hotels and do our thing have fun and i was like oh great i have nowhere to live i have nowhere to live i have nowhere to go and you know what you do in that situation you go to grandma's house shout out to grandma so much love for grandmas if you don't have a grandma I'll be your grandma I love you everybody deserves some sort of like motherly grandmotherly figure whether it's your actual grandma or like a distant aunt you know those aunts you have in your life that you're not really related at all they're just like an honorary member I feel like everybody

deserves like a older female in their life that can provide that for them and sometimes it's your mom sometimes your grandma your distant aunt whoever it is tell them you love them today because they always show up and show out for you I was like I have nowhere to go like where am I supposed to live during the summer I can't stay on campus they shut everything down I can't live in the dorms they shut it down I don't have money I don't have a home I don't have a childhood home also that's why I got this tattoo my uh my leaves I got my tattoo leaves after that experience because they're the I grew up on sumac street so I wanted a way to kind of honor that closing because I never really got to go back to my house or say goodbye to it at all um it was just gone

so that this was like my way of kind of coping and dealing but I had to go live at grandma's house for the summer and I had to drive two hours every morning to my 6 a.m daycare job where I was a teacher for two year olds from six to six no breaks if they decided to take a nap then I got a break and then I drive two hours home to grandma's house that that'll test you that will test you especially when your grandma's like a little crazy you're like oh life is really kicking my ass right now but if you're there or you've ever been there you understand struggle you over you understand overcoming struggle you also understand like giving appreciation to the people who don't do show up around you so yeah moral of the story

if you've lived with your grandma i trust you more than anybody else such a funny way of bonding oh how to have a good sleeping schedule sleeping early and waking up early well there's one thing i learned in child care it is routine is really important and this is why oh my god is my titty popping out no we're good this is why i talk a lot about the importance of routine because I feel like unless you work with children or kids you don't understand the importance of a routine and how integral it is to your brain forming your brain being stable enough to function like think about when you're a young child and you've had you've maybe experienced five percent of the world and then your routine is out of whack and you have no idea what to expect talk

about tantrum after tantrum after tantrum okay when kids have a stable routine in their lives they are able to develop better they'll be able to understand themselves better to understand their emotions better and we are just grown-ass fucking children our brains are still working the same like sure we have a little bit more of an understanding but there's so much more stimuli and so many more experiences and of course with lived experiences things are gonna get easier but they also could get harder and that's why I always emphasize routine you're like Hannah I know it's annoying you're going to feel better for it you're going to feel more stable for it ultimately there's like no losses to having a stable routine but I also understand when you're

in a negative routine like one that is not helping you switching into a good routine is really hard it's hard to make that change to implement a new routine overnight okay to change yourself overnight that's going to be really hard so you have to start like with one goal you can't start with the whole morning or the whole evening start with one goal so your goal is going to bed earlier you need to get to bed earlier you got to wake up in the morning let's start with the going to bed because waking up will be easier if you get at least a full eight hours it's hard to like wind down and get your brain to slow down especially after a long day um so I think a good wind down like preparing your brain to go to bed routine is important and to fall asleep earlier you just

implement that earlier in the day okay so like with kids my niece and my nephew they go to bed at 5 p.m like those kids are out at 5 p.m sharp there is no up after that there's no like sometimes you know slip ups I get that but like their routine is so set in stone 5 p.m their routine starts at like 3 34 I'm talking they're eating dinner at 4 okay dinner at 4 then they're going to immediately go upstairs run around play a little bit and then they're going to take a bath bath takes like 30 minutes then they're going to change into their pjs they're gonna go say good night to everybody then they're gonna go pick their book we're gonna read a book together maybe another one if they need another one we're gonna turn on the white noise machine we're gonna turn

the lights off maybe another book till they're ready to go to bed till they're sleepy good night close the door that's like an hour and a half routine but we as adults need that same routine if you get off work sit around do nothing and then don't start your routine in time until you start that routine it's not going to kick into your brain that hey girl we need to start winding down close down service you need closed down service for your brain literally so If you need to go to bed early, we're going to start that close down service an hour, two hours earlier, okay? The phone thing.

The phone thing is going to keep you up. If you have a phone around you, it's going to keep you up. Put your phone down. Put on a TV show that you've seen a million fucking times. You're going to be able to wake up or you're going to be able to go to bed earlier. As long as your brain has seen it before, understands it, knows what to expect, I think it's a good thing to fall asleep to. And I always fall asleep to a show.

I can't help it. i've done this since birth my parents always had like a radio in my room was playing radio um or i had a show on something like that so i just have to have that so i get i understand the necessary stimuli of outside noise but let's find like a healthier version let's not scroll on our phone for hours and hours and hours plug it in put it down let's put on a show that's like your favorite comfort show you know and then waking up early you just have to go to bed early and you got to set an alarm the alarm is there's no two three alarms it's one alarm and your ass better sit up also pro tip you chug a bunch of water before you go to sleep when you hear that alarm

first thing in the morning you're gonna have to be your first of all you're gonna wake up and be like fuck that alarm second of all you're gonna be like i have to pee so the first thing you kind of get up and jump start your day because you gotta pee just do not get back into bed don't crawl back into bed summer plans my summer plans are smoking weed in the park my best friends wearing cute little bikini tops laying in the sun going on hikes girls trips lots of girls trips this summer exploring the midwest getting out to the forest doing fairy activities mini skirts lots of plaid that's my summer plans nothing in specifics just taking advantage of life and not like advantage of that sounds scary i guess being a active participant in life

giving back to life and receiving from life that is the summer plans having fun dare i say legendary is here with bet mgm sportsbook sign up to unlock access to hundreds of pre-match and live betting options for all your favorite sports download the bet mgm app see bet mgm.com for terms 18 plus alberta only please play responsibly subject to eligibility requirements if gambling is affecting your mental health or well-being 211 alberta is here to help call or text 211 or visit ab.211.ca bet mgm operates pursuant to an operating agreement with the alberta i-gaming corporation standard message and data rates may apply my brain did not read this correctly someone said i have this friend that only calls slash

talks to me when she has drama valid reason to and then it was scissor emojis and i was like okay so you're not close friends so you should scissor no that's not what they meant they meant like cut off there's just not enough room to submit that um let me answer that my brain was like trying to wrap my head around it like i guess girl go for it um only calls talks to me when she has drama valid reason to cut off i say distance is probably important if you feel like your needs are not being met in a relationship you don't have to necessarily be like fuck you never talk to me again but you can distance yourself or like not respond when she is you know constantly complaining about the same thing set that boundary that way

or verbally set it and be like i don't like that you only call me to basically be your therapist talk to me when you have something positive to share i feel like it's a valid thing to say to somebody i've had that said to me and i had to be like oh shit okay no you valid real like that hurt but I hear you and if I'm a good person I'm going to hear your questions and concerns and show up accordingly you know what I mean um or scissor also can we talk about negative people uh not to be negative here but it's like that one segment where I was like I hate complainers and I complained about people complaining I I hate negative people but I have to be negative here for a second i just cannot stand it i can't listen i have been the negative person before

i have been the oh i just hate everybody and everybody hates me and life is just always against me and i've also been the angry person the fuck this fuck that i had an awful day nothing can make me happy i'm just mad at everybody i have been that person the same way i've been the complainer so i understand where it's stemming from but i can't fucking stand it i cannot listen we all get a certain amount of hall passes a day a week a month to be a negative person emotions are valid you're gonna feel a vast amount of emotions throughout your lifetime and you're gonna experience them and you're going to share them with other people probably valid real but when you're overwhelmingly consumed with negativity and constantly sharing it with

other people that shit gets annoying real quick because we are all we're all here simply trying our best we are all trying our best we're all just like smiling through it and trying to stay as positive as we can so when other people come up to us and they're just like let me just spew all of this negative energy onto you and make you an accomplice to my negativity it is so exhausting it is so exhausting I get also the you know gossiping is healthy in being able to understand your emotions talk about what's right and wrong in the world you know how do we know what red flags are if we weren't gossip gossiping about them girl but when people are overly consumed with talking negative to you about other people or that's all your conversations relate

about they're also doing that to you like if you have a friend that you guys only talk shit about people they're also talking shit about you behind your back because that's all that they can do and that is just heartbreaking and I have been there and it sucks to realize but that's also like another reason why I just can't surround myself with negative people because it's like I don't trust that you're not saying the exact same thing about me behind my back and that is scary I also think negative and negativity and gossip can become an addiction and I think it's because you just don't have to think about your own life like isn't life easy when you don't ever have to address what you're going through or who you are or your actions or your consequences and

you constantly just talk about other people's hell yeah life's easy when you do that and it becomes an addiction because then you never truly have to face what's happening in front of you or who you are as a person because you're constantly occupied with complaining or like gossiping about other people's problems you never have to take accountability because you're always taking accountability for other people making fun of other people or being negative about other people and that is just not a healthy habit to pick up so if you find yourself being overly negative and i've been there where it's just like emo era black eyeliner everything sucks i i hate my mom and my dad i hate my job like i've been there girl sometimes a good friend

will give you a reality check and be like i can't handle this anymore but also it gets exhausting and you will realize because you will be so tired all the time you won't want to talk to anybody because you will only have bad things to say it'll be exhausting living with yourself because you're constantly saying negative things to yourself if you find yourself in that position you can break free well if it's deep sometimes medication is nice someone asked me like oh do all depression medications make you uh dissociative and not feel anything it's like some do but that's because they're supposed to like when you're in such a low low low low low place you simply need to go from like the ground to like a basically stable and sometimes that

means dissociating from those negative thoughts but if you're just like a normal negative person not like a medication level negative person you're just like a normal person going through daily life who's overcome with negativity and just like over consumed with it the best thing to break out of that cycle is to start complimenting everything and i've talked about this practice before but i feel like it is such a everyday tool that you can use for everything that quickly changes the way you start thinking about things and that is giving compliments like not verbally or verbally shit why not i love saying hey girl love those boots you know um but in your head when you find yourself on that thought process and you're like whoa

what the fuck snap yourself out of it and give that thing a compliment so if you're like over consumed with how much you hate your fucking boss pause give yourself a compliment give your boss a compliment move on maybe you're over consumed with hating on a girl pause give yourself a compliment give her a compliment and this this can feel fake at first it's going to actually feel really fake at first and you're gonna have to force it a little bit but the more you do it the more authentic it'll become the quicker you'll be able to redirect those negative thoughts to a more positive version and the quicker you will be able to recognize and understand positivity in your life on a daily basis especially through the negativity

it is my number one tool that I use every single day it's something that I learned in um uh dbt like therapy and training and learning how to just like redirect thoughts quickly in um a moment especially when you have a habit of overthinking and thought spiraling um especially when you're a little extra emotional um having those handy tools to use on a daily basis and being brave enough to use them will have a direct effect on your life and it will have a direct positive effect on your life um i also think um gratuity and doing gratuity journaling is a great way to redirect those negative thoughts like every morning with your morning coffee write down five things you're thankful for you want a challenge write down 10 you want a real challenge

write down 10 things you like about yourself literally it is sometimes harder than you think and it is a great practice especially great everyday practice to kind of put yourself into a positive direction and also keep yourself consistently and constantly looking out for those positive things in your life or the things that you are grateful for in your life because you know you do it this morning now it's on your mind throughout the day now you're thinking okay so what am I going to put in my journal tomorrow? And then the next day, ooh, what am I going to put in my journal tomorrow? And this could be at any time. It could be your lunch break. It could be morning coffee. It could be, you know, evening, often edible in bed. As long as you're doing it

and practicing it and trying, all it takes is trying. No one ever tells you that. All it takes is trying. You don't have to succeed the first time, but if you're willing to, you know, get up out of the fucking mud and try it again you know wipe yourself off try it again maybe this day didn't work out who cares today's a new day try it again i don't know how to do that try it if you are brave enough to simply try doing the goddamn thing you will succeed you will get to where you want to go you will become the version you want to be because you did one thing that most people are not brave enough to do which is try anyways negativity i can't it is also so draining have you guys seen um what's that vampire show not twilight

i'm forgetting the vampire comedy show anyways i love uh colin robinson he's like a energy vampire and he's just like so mundane office worker bald white guy just like energy draining that sort of way but another form of energy draining to me literally in the real world vampire energy draining is like negative people who it's like they walk up and they're just like loud and angry and mean and I'm just like whoa I cannot take this on because girl I'm already on the brink we are all just trying our best that's all we can do so don't make it any harder for anybody else and especially don't make it harder for yourself anyways that was a fun tangent i gotta get some lunch in me here soon but i forgot to put up the fucking call-in link i'm so sorry i love hearing

your guys's voice but my ass is forgetful sometimes um especially during this very airy not really airy but just like open flowing Pisces season your girl cannot catch a break when it comes to um thoughts brain working you know but I'm gonna try and get to a couple more of your questions um and kind of do like a little speed around here knowing the right time to get pregnant listen I'm not one to really judge on anybody's situation but for me personally the right time to get pregnant is when I am emotionally physically financially stable in life and I feel like I've reached a point where my comfortability is at a max and I'm willing to challenge myself in a healthy way when I find myself emotionally stable most importantly and financially stable

most importantly that's me personally anyways someone said overcoming health anxiety oh real i have a lot of health anxiety now that i'm getting older i don't know i didn't think that would be a thing i didn't think that would be a like a symptom of becoming an adult but no one ever tells you that you just start getting really anxious about like oh my god i need to get my blood work done girl am i fucking 80 i used to be doing molly in the club night after night after night used to be like getting in random people's cars and doing cocaine out of their long ass pinky fingernail and going to the nearest warehouse where someone had dj equipment and sitting on a broken ass fucking couch chit-chatting with people off of so many drugs

like 6 a.m night after night after night and now i'm sitting here in front of you being like i need to get some blood work done maybe go to the dentist who am i honestly a way better version of myself let's be real but yeah health anxiety is very real the only way to um overcome and handle health anxiety is make sure you have your yearly annually whatever appointments set up and you go to them okay no need for that extra blood work or that extra whatever unless your doctor specifically says to do it go for it but like i'm like i have gynecologist appointment once a year i have a physical once a year i go the dentist twice a year you know eye vision health reproductive those are the main ones as long as you're going

to those main appointments that's all that matters oh you don't go to them that's okay let's start let's get that premium insurance let's i pay for my own insurance so i know how fucking expensive that can be but especially when you have health and health anxiety it's worth investing in yourself but all you need to go pro tip go to your yearly appointments asking for my best friend her boyfriend and her haven't had sex in two plus months sometimes that's normal sometimes it's not depends on how important sex is to you if it's like a quick random change and you guys just be fucking like bunnies then i'd bring it up but also if maybe that's not your vibe you guys are more like asexual living partners which also love slay then maybe it's

not something to be concerned about but if you're concerned about it it's okay to bring it up valid and be like what's going on and also if sex is important to you and you aren't getting it out of that relationship and you don't feel like you're sexually compatible anymore i think that's an okay reason to leave a relationship like sometimes people get along really really really well but there's just like no chemistry depending on how important that is to you for me really important okay so one time when i was really high i like this is crazy talk about health anxiety one time when i was really fucking high i was eating a chipotle burrito like devouring i'm talking 11 30 at night i have not eaten all day i just got off

a bar shift devouring this chipotle burrito and then um my boyfriend made me laugh and i started laughing but I have food in my mouth and I felt like something go down my throat but it it felt like it went like into my air pipe and I'm pretty sure it was like a black bean like I felt a black bean go into my air pipe and since that day that was like seven months ago since that day I keep thinking about the possible black beans stuck in my airway and I'll like I'm pretty sure there's know black beans stuck in my airway I wouldn't be able to breathe right now but I think about like a little black bean stuck in my airway all the time and I have no idea if it's there or not because I can't get like an x-ray I'm not gonna go spend thousands of dollars on a fucking x-ray

for a black bean also it probably isn't even there I'm just overthinking the black bean all the time anyways at least I like overthink black beans in my airways now instead of like life and my purpose here on earth the best thing to do is it's you already know don't overthink it choose peace someone said spread the word using organic menstrual product shortens periods i use the brand cora um real i had the longest most painful periods ever and that's i genuinely believe because i was using super plus tampons and the tampons were bleached cotton that was basically like a plug okay and listen the thing about periods is it's supposed to come out you're supposed to let it go it's supposed to be able to do its thing clean properly renovate the house

babe and we can't renovate the house if the shit's not leaving the fucking house um and my periods went from like eight days and super heavy and very crampy stopped using uh tampons and started using just like yeah organic pads um and a letting it flow the fuck out of me um stopped my cramping and shortened it and made it so much easier to deal with i also felt like the tampon pressing on my cervix was making me cramp a lot and it really was like i used to have cramps so bad that I thought I was gonna pass out that you're like that's normal as a woman and like every once in a while I hear that but consistently and constantly to the point of passing out like we're doing something wrong I used to be so pro tampon because it was easy but like who is it really easy for

you know what I mean you know what I mean now I'm like anti-tampon I just cannot put them inside of me I'm like oh I'm just gonna free bleed stay at home anyways I think that's really it for the podcast you guys I know I know but I went like way longer than I needed to on this and I haven't had lunch and I need to go eat and sit in some sunshine take some cute selfies of myself and hang out and enjoy my day and most importantly like clean my house or something so unfortunately i have to let you go but i had so much fun with you guys here on the podcast i hope i could bring some insightful conversations to you have a little laugh share a little smoke you know life is all about enjoying what we possibly can so hopefully i can be a constant reminder of that in your own

life that's really all i want to do is bring peace and positivity and a little understanding to people who maybe don't get it as regularly as they should um and uplift every single one of you along the way so i hope i could do that today i hope you have a wonderful rest of your weekend i will not see you until tuesday but if you want to see what i'm up to follow me on instagram at hannah marlene um to not only see what i'm up to but also submit your question every week um i put links everywhere with the hoodies if you want to buy them i wore them in my last episode and then patreon.com if you want extra content day in the lives astrology updates monday affirmations sunday journal props we are booked and busy over on the patreon but i love you guys

so much have a wonderful rest of your weekend and i will see you all so very soon you