Smoke Sesh - life's purpose, body neutrality & becoming an influencer

Episode Date: April 1, 2025

hello everyone and happy Tuesday! welcome back to another wonderful episode, we have a lot to chat about today! we jump right into what ive been up to and the transitionary phases of life, finding lifes purpose and what that means, infused bevs and go to drinks of spring, as summer comes up we talk body neutrality and learning to live with yourself, living in your body and body positivity, going to protests, becoming an influencer, is it worth it? what its really like being an influencer, career and you can do anything if you set your mind to it, delete TikTok, doing hard things for the betterment of yourself, manifestation 101 and how to harness positive energy for good plus much much much more! thank you so much for listening if you want to hear more from me join the patreon at patreon.com/smokeseshshawty and follow me on instagram hannahmarlene ! MUAH!

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash, so come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life. The good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing, I've got a story for it all. hello hotties and welcome back to the internet's favorite smoke sesh my name is hannah your host and i am so excited to be back with you all on this beautiful little spring morning we have going on we had a slight little cold front come through but i overall have been loving the 70s and warm

and sunshiny weather truly i feel rejuvenated i feel a renewed sense of hope depression i don't know her we are doing ultimately a little bit better which hey we're on the come up which don't we love this past week has been pretty chill i'm definitely in like a transitionary period of my life which i have learned to really love the transitions a lot that's one thing my boyfriend brings up to me a lot he's like you garner a lot of change in your life like you you really enjoy change and that that's something that he admires about me it's first of all it's important to have partners that you can like admire things about them of course partners supposed to help you learn and grow and he's definitely somebody who maybe doesn't enjoy change or didn't enjoy change

as much as I did where I'm like all right I'm packed I'm ready to move like let's go let's move to a different country let's move here let me change jobs blah blah blah like whatever I love change I love the renewal I love the energetic transformation of it all uh he's not exactly the same because I think most of the change that he has been through has been thrusted upon him and hasn't been necessarily the most positive changes and I'm not going to sit here and be like oh yeah all the changes all the transformations I've been through have been easy peasy so fantastic so amazing so lovely uh no sometimes those changes are things that the universe are like bitch you're done you're done no more for you you gotta figure it out now sorry not something you're

supposed to be doing and you don't want to stop it yourself so let me stop it for you um but i have learned throughout the years that even if it's hard or easy which would prefer the easy way but sometimes the hard way is the only way um that change in that transitionary phase is just so nice because every time you go through it, your life gets exponentially better. If you allow space in your life to change and grow and transform and new paths, you take the calculated risk, you do the move, you change the job. If you are smart enough to continuously allow yourself to change and develop at a rate that you feel is good for you and that you feel is healthy for you you will continuously just upgrade upgrade upgrade in life even those hard transitions where it's

like i don't want to change actually i love being miserable here right now it's so fun lying through my teeth the universe you know will always uproot you and put you onto a better path even those hard changes you always come out ultimately on top on top so I definitely feel like this is a time in my life where it's like all right all right it's time I have been where I've been for quite some time and I have truly enjoyed it I love where I live I love what I do I theoretically could live here for the rest of my life I could do this thing for the rest of my life I could work in a restaurant for the rest of my life is it what I need or what I want no not particularly is it something I could do definitely but when you're feeling that need of

just like transformation and change lean into it okay it will only bring blessings and abundance and it is just such a potent time especially during spring to invest in that energy and to follow that intuition. So I've really been trying to connect and learn and listen to that side of myself more so than ever during this spring, especially dealing with some stressful things or some, you know, things that are out of my control, taking time to really focus on, well, what can I control? Where can I free up some space energetically to bring in blessings, to bring in positivity in order to kind of manage and persevere so I know that seems very vague in general transformation and change is always so vague like that ultimately I'm just trying to find

a house to move into I love apartment living this is it's fantastic my apartment is gorgina amazing and ultimately I will probably be on the house hunt for quite a bit of time because I am comfortable here and I don't feel like I should downgrade like if I'm gonna move I want to move into a house that I enjoy with a backyard that I enjoy with an interior that I enjoy so taking my time to really think that through not rush the process and be patient searching for those things navigating career changes which hey shout out to all of my girlies out there not me being like I'm so sorry I'm putting ads into this podcast the amount of you guys that were like actually I'm switching permanently to spotify like fuck youtube let me get you in your bag let me listen to those

ads let me play that episode four times over you guys are genuinely this fucking sweetest i don't know why i was so nervous about that maybe because like i don't know i don't want to get it misconstrued that this is like a cash grab because this is genuinely like something that fulfills my soul not something that eats away at my soul for money like i i've been doing this for free for like three years basically so i was like you know what fuck it let's put some ads in and you guys have been so supportive and so understanding so thank you all so very much the sold out bong collab like wow the support is endless and i really appreciate you guys there may be maybe maybe will be a restock coming soon stay tuned all right it won't be as much as we uh released

in the first round but i want to make sure everybody who can get the fairy bong can get their hands onto it we're reaching out to the suppliers so stay tuned maybe I'll have some good news or sad news for you guys next week but it's just been such a potent time energetically and I'm trying to utilize that energy and kind of transmute it into more blessings and into more positivity and into more peace and calm in my life so that has been something I have been work on energy transmutation energy is so important something that i've really learned throughout the years is how potent energy can be and if you learn to utilize it in places where it does hold importance and making space for more energy mostly positive energy duh um that you can kind of like

crack the key to life the code to life i mean if you think about it manifestation is all about energy and utilizing the energy inside you and outside of you gratitude is all about positive energy and I think you can even like negatively manifest things for you if you get into like a negative mindset where you think oh only the worst can happen only the worst can happen I'm a bad person I deserve these bad things like if you believe that and you put that energy out there the universe will kind of listen to you and then give you those things so I've really just been focusing on harnessing that energy making space for newness and you know utilizing tilling the soils of my life in order to garner some really beautiful summer foliage and energetic blessings

wow okay hippie dippy hannah girl put me in some tie dye give me some acid and put me in a tent in a festival yeah that's the kind of energy i'm giving today but i think it's good i love the whimsiness of spring I'm starting to do a little bit of gardening I got involved with my local gardening group I got a garden plot for the summer and it's like all these older ladies who it's like I can tell that this is what they live for every single year like this is their book club this is their community event is gardening so I have been in this group chat with all these ladies and honestly learning a lot I really appreciate it they are so genuinely smart but I'm like wow i need to take this shit way more seriously like and the only reason that they take it this

seriously is because they've had time to figure it out so i'm not putting too much pressure on myself but i do need to like lock in and get into my gardening bag a little bit but that's been pretty fun we celebrated my boyfriend's mom's birthday this weekend there was a couple birthday celebrations so had a little drink had a little mexican food celebrated enjoyed had some really delicious food honestly all weekend that's my favorite way to celebrate the weekend is just to eat my way through the city but other than that not much to catch you guys up on just been like i said transmuting energy bringing in blessings trying to harness this potent and really beautiful energy of spring and hopefully hopefully i can inspire you guys to do the same as well we just

had our aries new moon solar eclipse if you're a patreon member i did a whole write-up on it with some spells if you also like want to stay in touch with like astrology and my life i've been uploading my weekly the artist's way journey onto patreon as well weekly episodes come join patreon.com smoke slash shawty it's a good time over there but we just kind of ended this two year cycle or this two year i like to consider them chapters this chapter in life where we've been kind of facing the same interpersonal either with ourself with our family with people around us with life in general kind of cycle of how we interact with the world and how we want to interact with the world in the future and what we are trying to bring in and that just ended this

weekend so definitely feeling like a completion of that chapter a completion of a certain page in my life in my book of life and now I'm ready to move on to the next chapter and what's so fun about starting a new chapter is like what does it contain like we're laying the foundations we are you know slowly working our way through the paragraphs but we don't know what the future holds quite yet and that can feel very daunting and scary but ultimately your goal right now is to lay a solid base a solid foundation for the next chapter to stand on so if you don't know what to do right now get the details in order get the foundation settled how are you feeling how do you want to feel and move forward from there so I feel like this is a good time to bring this

question up someone kind of asked about finding your purpose in life and I know we've talked in the past about purpose purpose what am I supposed to do and I feel like I usually talk about it in a sense of career because when we do talk about purpose in a general sense most people are talking about career um we live in a capitalist society bro like of course it's going to be about career and money um but i kind of want to escape that mindset for a second and take on like a new observation of purpose in life i think trying to pinpoint it and trying to do figure out what you're supposed to do for the rest of your life kind of negates the whole point of having a purpose because we as human beings you know change transformation you go through those things so

fast and your purpose today might not be your purpose 10 years from now and I think that's a really important lesson to learn early on so then you're able to tackle the issues that you're facing or the things that are you know energetically serving you in the moment utilize that fully and then move on as growth and transformation approaches you as it does in life. So here's like the examples to kind of go side by side with what I'm talking about. It's like my purpose in life when I was 14 was to not kill myself like dead ass. It wasn't to get the grades. It wasn't to you know become a honor roll student sure some people at that point in life that was their purpose in life my most of my friends that I went to school with I mean I wasn't distinguished

scholars I was friends with all the honors students like that was their purpose in life me on the other hand I had to learn very quickly that my everybody's purpose in life is going to vary and we are not all going to be on the same page at the same exact time and as soon as you accept that and learn to understand what you need in the moment and follow through with it the easier life gets for you i really fought my mental illness for a long time i'm not her i don't want to be her i'm not connected to her and it really spiraled spiraled into a point where it was like oh wow now I'm feeling to take myself out of the game so I need to now focus all of my time and my energy on being here and learning to live with myself learning to handle my mental illness to

live with it side by side and to become comfortable with it because ultimately it is going to be a lifelong thing become comfortable with myself that was my purpose in that moment and as soon as I was girl locked up it quickly became my purpose because the only way I was going to get out was to fully focus on healing and betterment once I succumbed to that and I was like you know what fine I'll give it my all I got duh so much better I got so much more in tune with myself and I was able to handle the problem that was my purpose my purpose was who is Hannah how can I learn to live with her and handling my mental illness now guess what I figured that shit out duh I mean every day is kind of like a mental illness is like so fun and cute and every day

is like a little bit of a battle but the more you get to know it the easier it does get and now like thinking back in the day whoof I have not fought a battle that hard in quite some time so I'm thankful for young Hannah knowing that that was her purpose and handling that issue in the moment because then it made room for other purposes in my early 20s my purpose was figuring out what I didn't like okay I thought oh you know I'll just get on the same path that everybody else is on and it'll be easy for me and you know it's already laid out in front of me let me just go and do it and then I realized I was miserable doing those things and I kind of had a crash out early 20s moment that most people have where it's like holy shit I'm doing nothing for me and I need to

start figuring out what I enjoy and my purpose in life in my early 20s was what the fuck do you not like and what do you like you know finally the world has opened itself up to us a little bit as adults we have all of this free time ish and just like access to the world around us that we didn't have as children so allowing myself to try out different things to fumble a little bit to make mistakes that was my purpose in life and that could it was an awkward phase I will say but once I committed to it and allowed myself to explore and develop myself socially physically career-wise I was then able to close that chapter pretty quickly move on to my next purpose 23 to 25 has been working online it's been yes career focused a little bit more than it usually is but

once again purpose can be career it doesn't mean it's everything and it doesn't also have to be long-term goals my purpose right now here in this moment is making sure my cat is healthy and you're like oh that's so simple that's so like nothing oh your purpose in life is making sure your cat is healthy yes yes it is because everything else we're going good I feel like stable and every other aspect of my life my purpose in life right now is making sure that he is taken care of that I am figuring out that issue that I no more health scares for him that he is feeling happy and healthy and sure maybe that's a short-term purpose but that doesn't negate the purpose at all we think so much of these big ideas these long-term goals and I think your purpose in life

can be those things but sometimes also it has us overlook the importance of the little things in our life the little things can hold just as much weight and power as those big purposes can and as soon as you realize intuitively how to follow like truly what your heart is kind of like pulling towards and you allow yourself to actually problem solve those things out and put your full attention on those things and give your all a hundred percent to that purpose that is truly calling to you life starts to make more sense it does absolutely and I have a million more purposes to go through before I die I don't think you can sit here and be like oh yes my one purpose is this one thing boom pinpointed I'm going to go and do that because I mean yes I'm glad you have

an idea and I'm glad you have a sense of purpose and what you want to do but you will eventually go and achieve that thing and once you achieve that thing if this is all you've been living towards you are gonna feel a little bit empty at the end of the day once you achieve that thing because it's like well now what I've lived my whole life for this one big amazing grand thing and I achieved it but now what now now I've done it now there is no purpose I feel like it causes a lot of spirals and a lot of people your purpose will constantly evolve and change with the era with the chapter with the moment that you are in and the sooner you learn to accept that to look for it to go after it a hundred percent no matter how big or small the easier life is and the more

seamless it seems to flow together I spent a lot of my time chasing like the big idea the big thing what am I gonna do career-wise when in reality my purpose has always been there I just maybe didn't realize how important it was yes taking care of my cat is my purpose right now that thing is important it's important to me it's important to him it's important to my mental health in the past you know making mistakes oh that's your purpose yes because i didn't know what i wanted to do and i had to try on different hats and try out different jobs and try out different things in order to kind of find a direction uh before that my depression oh that was your purpose yes because i had to get that shit figured out or else i wasn't going to be able to function

as a human being girl i wasn't going to be here period it's going to change it's going to flow you know what your purpose is because it's the one thing that intuitively you can't get out of your fucking head it's the one thing where you're in the shower you're trying to meditate you are in yoga class and bitch it's still there it's eating away at your brain hey girl hey girl can't get rid of me that easily that's the thing you're meant to handle that's the thing you're meant to understand to dive in fully and if you commit to those things you will achieve that purpose you will get it handled faster than you ever could have imagined but also don't base your life on one big purpose because there's so many of them to achieve i think and also like in a more

mentally sane sense of an example of life purpose and allowing yourself to flow purpose to purpose and not just having one big goal that you've been living towards and kind of ignoring all of the other small successes that you have achieved as well my brother's kind of done this definitely more mentally sane but it's like all right um graduate high school in honors bam purpose achieved get into dream college bam purpose achieved um meet amazing woman bam purpose achieved go to law school complete law school bam purpose achieved um marry this amazing woman that he loves fully, bam, purpose achieved. Get a job that truly fulfills his heart and his soul, bam, purpose achieved. Have children, bam, purpose achieved. It keeps going and going and going and

going. That's the flow of life. And I don't want you to ignore the small things. I don't want you to, you know, ignore those small successes and those small achievements just because you have this like one big goal your purpose will flow and change as long as you dedicate yourself to it a thousand percent you dedicate yourself to yourself a thousand percent you will achieve those big goals those big dreams but don't give up after that there's always more to discover there's more growth to have there's more transitions to have there's more out there always i just feel like this whole purpose of life kind of conversation can feel so daunting and can feel so big picture esque that it's like well I just don't have one I'm just going to work in a restaurant all my life

it's like cool but if that's what you want to do no one's shaming you you know if your purpose right now is to like oh I want to go from server to bartender amazing fantastic that is a purpose that is you know your intuitive desire follow that don't demean it in any sort of way and don't compare yourself to anybody else but your past self I don't know it's something that I've really been kind of thinking about a lot because my parents always place so much stress like what's next what's next what are you doing with your life blah blah blah blah and I hate to be like well what's important to me right now is like figuring out this weird health issue my cat's going through because yeah you say that and my parents look at me like i'm crazy like okay cool

that's fantastic but there's there's nothing else you want to do it's like no that is what i need to commit commit myself to a thousand percent right now like that is what's causing me the most stress so that's the one thing i do need to figure out and i don't want anybody looking at me and saying that shit's not important because i know in my heart that that is important to me and that is all that fucking matters and you know what after I figure this shit out maybe my purpose in life is like going and starting my own tv show who knows maybe it's a big fantastic amazing purpose after this that's for future Hannah to figure out right now I know what it is I need to sit down handle it work through it and trust the universe will sit by my side throughout the entire

thing so don't stress yourself out okay you know what you need right now you know what you are intuitively called to listen to it don't let anybody else get in your head and say your dreams your desires are not important or they're too small or they're not meaningful they are if they mean something to you that is literally all that fucking matters but that is my ramble to start us all off I hope you enjoyed um I don't know it's just something I've definitely been having on my mind a bit recently because yeah it is like I don't know my poor little kitty cat has been going through the same thing over and over and over and my vet now is kind of like we don't really know what to do I don't know and so now I'm having to switch to a different vet and yes it's frustrating

and yes I feel bad I can't take away all of his pain but also all I can do right now is do the best that I can for him to make sure he's getting the best treatment that best help I'm like going and seeing a specialist I don't give a fuck how much it costs me like we're getting this shit figured out now that's my purpose anyways yeah danger update he did the sedation and flushing and it seemed to have worked but it's not really um so i found this amazing cat specialist in kansas city who is so incredibly sweet and they're like you know what we are not taking new clients for the next nine months but we'll make an exception for you so we go in next week and hopefully hopefully hopefully hopefully they will kind of um know a little bit more what's

going on or be able to perform treatments a little more thoroughly because my vet currently love love endlessly he's so incredibly sweet and patient he literally was like we have like vet forums and chat rooms for only people who are obviously vets so we can compare and contrast different cases or see if anybody else has been through this which first of all appreciate like wow didn't know that network existed how do I get access to that um and he's like you know I've been asking around with different vets across the United States if they've had cats go through this and he's like uh people really have not I'm like oh great oh great thank you oh perfect he's like as long as it's not bothering him I think it's okay like well yeah but it is bothering him so

all i can really focus on is the next step in front of me and making sure he is happy and healthy in the meantime that's my purpose and i kind of love it you know how lucky am i to be able to love a little animal so much and be in a position where i don't have to stress about finances like take him in get him handled get him checked out let's do the surgery let's do whatever whatever helps him in the long run i'm here for it someone said oh no my cat broke the wing off my new fairy bong how do I process these emotions I am so genuinely sorry um I feel like I'm looking at my bong right now and I'm looking at the seam I genuinely think you could probably glue it back on with a good like adhesive gorilla glue and you would be good to go and then just don't pick her

up by the wings these bongs are like very very solid but like definitely if it gets knocked off a table there's some risk there always um but like looking at the seam I think if it was like a clean break I mean obviously clean your piece out and make sure there's no glass in it um but like I think you could definitely just like glue that bitch back on I've definitely done that with like old pieces not these but I remember I bought my first ever like really nice like um bong and it was like 250 dollars girl why the fuck was I spending that anyways and I remember the the mouthpiece broke off it was like really thin and long and the mouthpiece broke off girl I just glued that shit right back on and kept it pushing cannabis drinks i've never tried and curious about

your thoughts i honestly love a cannabis drink if you follow my instagram at hannah marlene i've worked with a few different cannabis uh drink companies um to do some recipes and also just to like try out the two main ones being wink w-y-n-k who make infused seltzers and i think they're coming out with a new flavor which I'm very excited about for summer I think they're like three different lemonade flavors oh if you like a LaCroix that's basically what they taste like and they hit harder than an edible because I feel like when an edible is solid it takes a little bit longer for your body to digest it and that's why you have that 30 minute to an hour onset whereas with cannabis drinks or infused drinks since they're a liquid they go into your bloodstream

so much faster a little bit longer than smoking it of course but I would say within 10-15 minutes you start to feel a little bit of a buzz and I honestly really enjoy them especially in a social setting where maybe I'm not trying to drink or I just want to like hang out on my front porch at 2 p.m. and have a little fun beverage like I don't need to be drinking at 2 p.m. sometimes maybe I'll just have like a little infused bevy so i do enjoy the wink seltzers and then also there's a brand called nowadays that makes almost like a what you would consider a liquor but it's infused instead so it's you would buy it the same way you would buy tito's and use it as a mixer and then with that you can kind of you know add more if you want more of a dosage add less if you want less

of a dosage and mix it in with fun different drinks both have had the same effects although the different companies both have had the same exact effects on me where it's like pretty quick onset they don't hit as hard as edible sometimes the edible scaries really get you because it's like all right time's ticking when am i gonna feel this and then you're like whoa i feel everything all at once i feel like with the bevvies it's not so much like that where it's so intense as long as you really get the dosage right i mean you drink eight of those seltzers i'm sure you'll be feeling a little crazy but you have one little five milligram bevy love great fantastic and a great alternative to drinking as well especially if you want to be a social drinker you're going over to

your friend's house you know that they're gonna pre-game a little bit and you're maybe sober off alcohol get you a little thc bevy you know taste good feel good overall 10 out of 10 and i love new products i like love a new cannabis product because it's so interesting to see what people are doing with it like people get so inventive but yeah there's a lot on the market now the two that i really enjoy are the wink and the nowadays if you are curious highly recommend speaking of someone asked go to spring drink okay finally i'm on my matcha bullshit again and you guys the og girlies know i loved a swamp drink do you know what a swamp drink is it's essentially a matcha latte and then you add a swamp water swamp drink girl you don't even know your own lingo swamp

water it's a matcha latte preferably oat milk duh a little bit of simple syrup or honey and then you add espresso into it too because trust a girl needs a little extra a little extra pick me up and it looks disgusting like swamp water that's the name that was my go-to for a long long time But now, now I have discovered the most amazing, wonderful drink known to man. Essentially, it's a matcha spritz or a sparkling matcha. You take sparkling water and then matcha. And then if you want a sweetener, you can do any sort of homemade jam, any homemade syrup. The spot up the street for me does a citrus yuzu syrup.

it is so fucking good i'm actually thinking about going and getting another one today i have had one every day for the past three days it's amazing it's amazing you can do this at home though and i definitely will be doing it you can make any sort of jam out of just like a little bit of sugar whatever fruit you want and then you boil it down to a thick consistency add a little bit of water blend it up so it's emulsified mix it in with whatever you want fantastic but a matcha spritz any sort of sparkling matcha with any sort of syrup has been a game changer this spring season help with body neutrality as we enter the summer season oh oh very real very real i've talked a lot about body neutrality but i think the spring summer season is always a great time to re-bring

up the topic and maybe give some tips and relieve some stress that you might be feeling um especially as we grow and our bodies change and you go through your second puberty and you are more womanly figured and we are now even more so being fed this need to be skinny which is like very scary we're living in dark times trust you do not need to fall down the pro-anna timeline it will not do any benefit for you at all i've always had a complicated relationship with my body now i think I am very blessed with the genetics that I do have um and I am very thankful that like my dad was stick skinny and then my mom was curvy like I am obviously the love child of both of them and I do think I fit into a lot of the stereotypes or the aesthetics that society does place an

emphasis on so I haven't had as much trouble as maybe other people have had with feeling comfortable in their body from a societal pressure way um but i have felt the general sense of pressure that i think every woman has felt where you just never feel good enough you know the trends change so quickly overnight the celebrities who you know make the trends can afford all of the surgeries to physically change overnight and it is so exhausting and impossible to keep up with and ultimately I think the best thing I did for myself was just allowing me to be me and to not consume so much content on other women's bodies a lot of the time when I was overthinking myself it was because I was overthinking other people's bodies you know when

I was younger and I was going through my mental health issues yes I was on the pro-anna side of tumblr and you know overwhelmingly being bombarded with these negative thought processes and these comparisons like of course that translated to a negative relationship with my body and of course it made the stress even more and you know the pressure even more um so once i kind of removed that from my life and stopped engaging with content that was so comparison contrasting so pressurized with aesthetics you know I stopped knowing what the trend was so I stopped feeling the pressure I understand if you're online in general you're going to see that but I do think reducing your consumption hours of being on your phone and content especially negative content

does translate to a better relationship with your body a thousand percent if all you are seeing is videos of people talking about how i'm not skinny enough or i don't look good enough or blah blah this is how much i eat in a day that's all you're going to be thinking about the content you consume does translate to the way your brain thinks in everyday life so being smart about the content you consume and knowing like okay I gotta put the fucking phone down or I'm going on a path that's not good for me or wow that video is really triggering let me go ahead and block that person I think that's really healthy I think that people have not understood how to set boundaries online and I don't want you to be afraid to be like I don't want to consume that content I'm gonna

block that person do you know what I mean or wow that was really negative and that just put some really bad thoughts in my brain I don't need to engage with this content anymore now there is like this kind of self-harm aspect of it all where it's like I know this is bad for me so I'm going to keep consuming it and consuming it consuming it please for the love of god don't feed into that like brain worm side of yourself that just wants to eat negative feelings like you do have power over what you consume so please stand strong in those boundaries and don't fall down those rabbit holes um because it will make just in general real life way way way harder so boom a make sure you are consuming content that is good for your brain and if you're on the phone too damn much

girl get off the phone b i don't think we were meant to perceive our bodies as much as we are in this very moment i've said it before but i'll say it again like we were only meant to see our face in a clear river stream like we were never meant to see the reflection of ourselves or to kind of like know our bodies or see our bodies or just like observe our bodies this much and it is overwhelming like if you're only thinking about your body 24 7 that is very very overwhelming and i think it's a very unnatural way to live absolutely like if you need to put the mirror away put the mirror away I think it's very healthy I went through this period of time where I was kind of like falling into this eating disorder behavior and I think a lot of it stemmed from just

like too much observation of who I was and a lot of that triggered body dysmorphia where I was seeing something in the mirror that simply wasn't real and that was because I was just like over consuming the visual aspect of my body and so what I did in that moment is I put all the mirrors away okay the body mirrors put them away done now of course like I gotta go to work I gotta do my makeup I gotta you know do my skincare routine whatever I would not allow myself to stand less than two feet away from my mirror ideally three feet where you have that nice little blur going on but I'm not able to count every single pore on my fucking face like I was only able to really observe my face do what I need to do get out of there and it took a long time for me to I mean I took like I

was in the depths so it took like a month or two of me to finally get used to this routine but after that time like and allowing my brain to go through the processes of withdrawal in that sort of sense I stopped thinking about it you know I wasn't looking at my body as much so I stopped thinking about it as much boundaries these things are very important if you find yourself going down this like negative thought spiral you have to understand where it's stemming from and put that blockage in place not allow yourself to keep going on these like harmful spirals that are ultimately setting you back completely so if you need to put the mirror away the observation away do so do so also like when's the last time you allowed yourself to just like sit in your body I know

that's a crazy question but when's the last time you allowed yourself to feel your body to connect with your body okay that could be really terrifying and scary if you haven't done it in a long time you can do this in a form of like meditation and breath work I'm not talking like stop thinking but just focus on breathing in and out breath work maybe a little yoga where you're just allowing yourself to like do downward dog and child's pose very simple little five minute flow but simply simply allowing yourself to move your body and feel your body um allowing yourself to be naked and not cover it up i know that's weird but i'm very much the naked neighbor i'm so sorry but like allowing myself to exist in my body without any sort of covering or shame there and

the jump scare of it all where it's like wow I haven't done this in a long time and I'm feeling very disconnected but the more you do it the more connected you feel in a healthy manner where it's like I'm just existing you know I'm not this I'm not that I'm not this trend I'm not this aesthetic I am just me Hannah here now and I think that is a very important place to get to with your body and these can these things can be very scary but I think if you allow yourself to you know put those blockages in place where you're not allowing those negative thought processes and then do the hard work of just like existing the better your relationship will be now we talked about spring clothing trends in the last episode and I think it's important to allow yourself to wear whatever

you feel comfortable in period that's literally all that matters if you want to wear a long flowy dress that doesn't even touch your body fantastic amazing as long as you feel comfortable in it but like if you're trying to wear those shorts from seventh grade that don't fit and you're feeling bad about yourself trying to squeeze into the shorts from seventh grade it's like yes because you're not a pre-teen anymore you're not supposed to fit into those jeans that's how it's supposed to be change that wardrobe get clothes that fit you get clothes that you enjoy wearing it'll take off that societal pressure of your body now bikini season is coming up best thing to do get a bikini that you feel comfortable in and that you feel hot and sexy in period

sydney mary bikini really kind of taught this to me she is a small business owner who makes handmade one-of-a-kind bikinis if you need a good bikini from a small business highly highly recommend sydney mary bikini on instagram but i bought my first bikini like real bikini from her and it is so gorgeous and amazing and hot and sexy and that's the first time i ever put on a swimsuit and i was like wow wow like one of a kind on this puss one of a kind on these tits bitch like try me and it fit perfectly I felt like it flattered my body well I felt like it was cute in general so when I went to the beach when I went to the ocean when I went to the river when I was hanging out in the park in my bikini top it wasn't how does my body look it was wow this bikini is

really cute and I wear it well I also think here in America we kind of face some of these issues that other countries just don't face or don't put any emphasis on and there's a lot of like at least here what i've noticed there's a lot of like comparison when it comes to women's bodies and i think that's just become because there's been a lot of competition between women placed here and also like shame whereas you look at these european countries where women are allowed to go topless to the beach and there are women of all different shapes sizes who are there simply enjoying and being and i think about that a lot where it's like that's how it should be like women should be allowed to feel comfortable in their bodies period women should be allowed to

feel their bodies period no matter the shape or size or aesthetic of it all societal pressure we should just be allowed to be and exist and enjoy and once you allow yourself to do that as a woman you'll realize nothing else is more important than that it's a hard journey but it's a worthwhile journey and especially as we are growing into women and our bodies are changing the less pressure you put on yourself to be this certain thing and the more pressure you put on yourself to just be the easier time you'll have there's no reason you should spend a majority of your time and your day thinking about your body girl there are bigger things going on that we gotta deal with and you deserve that space in your head to think about those important things

it's a hard journey but it's a worthwhile one i don't sit on here and preach the body positivity a whole lot because i mean like duh every single woman is amazing and hot and beautiful and sexy and i'd be lying if i said i didn't think that like abso-fucking-lutely but i don't think like especially coming from a place where maybe you have a tumultuous relationship with your body I don't think the whole body positivity movement is a it just doesn't have like the longevity because you can sit here and you'll be like yes my body's beautiful but then like you know the negative thoughts might fall on you and then it's hard to stay in that positivity mindset I think the longevity really exists in the neutrality aspect where it's like this is my

vessel period okay that is all that matters of course the positivity can help flip a negative mindset where like gratuity is really important where it's like giving thanks for your body appreciating who you are having that positive outlook of course does help i'm not going to sit here and be like positivity doesn't help duh yes it does but i do think you should just feel comfortable being who you are and existing in who you are no matter what i think that's where that longevity really exists whenever i need a dose of like wow we really are just human vessels i love going to the art museum i love going to the art museum you need a dose of like womanliness and appreciation of the art of the human form go to the art museum please please do not go to instagram

do not go to tiktok go to the art museum escape the pressures of now and really go look at what real fucking humans look like what the appreciation of real humans look like go look at the fertility goddesses and deities go look at the aphrodite paintings go look at these beautiful pieces of are it really really will help that mindset of like need to fit in and more so transform it into appreciation of who you are now and that's that's what matters you know someone asked do you participate in protests feeling scared yes i've actually my mom is a big protest girlie like she is very much so out on those streets 24 7 i had to go make she was just protesting at the state capital for the school board and I had to make this like 20 foot banner for them to throw over

the capital steps she's like can you please come over and paint this I'm like yeah girl I got you let me do my part because I couldn't show up I was busy but like I'll make you a giant banner sure fantastic um but I grew up going to a lot of protests with her specifically involving um like school funding and protesting the government for obviously never ever ever giving enough money that the public schools need so she's always been out and about with the teachers or any sort of like women's march i usually always go to and have gone to since i was young um and i think with a sense of community i mean yes now like with the state of the world very scary duh especially when protesters are getting snatched off the streets um and i think

it is always always important to protect yourself no matter what make sure that you are protecting the people around you don't put anybody's faces on social media at all like please i think we have gotten way too comfortable filming and recording people in public and posting it online without their consent and especially at protests if you want to make sure that everybody around you is safe and safety most importantly is anonymity do not post their faces unless obviously they want that and how are you gonna know that other than if you talk to them but i do feel a sense of safety when i am at these protests because it is like community and when you're surrounded by like-minded people who are there for the same purpose and who are as passionate as you you know that they are

there to stand side by side with you and protect you um so i don't feel necessary necessarily like super super unsafe to the point where i'm like i'm not going because i do think if you feel the need to protest and show up i don't think you should let fear stand in the way um obviously mask up duh show up for the people around you protect their anonymity but like yeah a totalitarian government is going to want you to be afraid to do these things um and then more so than ever is when it's important wow i truly pulled the term totalitarian out of the back of my skull from the depths of my memory and somehow used it correctly I actually had to google it but yeah there's actually a big nationwide protest going on next week I believe next Saturday April 5th where

there's going to be protests and if you are interested it's going to be protests at pretty much every state capitol so if I have the day off I probably will be attending but if you are interesting to get involved look at local community organizations community organizers simply just show up and I guarantee you know there will be people there and there will be a community-based group there but yeah I've gone to a lot of protests most of them having to do with my amazing state capital of Topeka Kansas um I we have done a lot of protesting against also the westborough baptist church which if you don't know exists in um topeka kansas i also have just faced a lot of protesting from the opposite side mostly the westborough baptist church

they posted protested everything my school graduation they protested they would just randomly show up to my high school and protest with signs because we had lgbtq students and supported them how dare we um they would always protest funerals of service members and of soldiers which is really fucked up um so when i saw them doing it and doing it for like the wrong reasons i'm like girl fuck you the least i can do like if you're gonna be stupid and go out and do it for the wrong reasons like protesting planned parenthood like i will show up and do the opposite you know but yeah if you're feeling that energy and you want to get involved do it do it we need people we need support and I think it's good when you have that energy to do something with it

instead of just sitting still and standing by and feeling like you were out of control and that you you don't have a change you can't make a change you don't have a voice you do have a voice oh my gosh someone asked how do I become an influencer I don't know do you really want the tea do you also like do you really want to become an influencer i walk through target and sometimes i'll go through target not really so much anymore but back in the day when i would go and i would like get my niece and my nephew christmas gifts or i would go to target to get them like birthday gifts what really really fucking spooked me is next to the alphabet blocks and the wooden toys and the brain games and puzzles there were wooden influencer kits including a fake wooden ring

light a fake wooden camera and tripod now that's fucking scary that is spooky and scary and never ever ever ever do i think a child should ever have that in their hands like what i don't think we should be like grooming children to become influencers i think that is extremely problematic and weird and uncomfortable in every sort of the sense but i understand how people nowadays who are like my age or 20s see the rise of the influencers and i think we really saw like how much power and money that these influencers are making over covid because companies learned that oh why would i pay two billion fucking dollars on a ad on tv when i can play that pay this influencer one percent of that and get 10 times the amount of reception so we saw companies putting a lot of investments

in these influencers over covid and they made a lot of money very quickly and it's hard to not look at that lifestyle where it's like oh well i can post a bracelet and promote it and make three hundred thousand dollars like what the fuck of course you want to do that of course you want to become an influencer of course of course of course duh you'd be stupid to say like oh i don't want to have an easy job and make a lot of money like you see that it's like yeah i want to become an influencer and i get you girl if only if only the company still had that money they don't have that money they don't have that money i'm gonna break it to you the hard way the money the influencers are making and I missed this so I have no numbers for you I'll tell you that I'm not

making any sort of even close remotely close to any sort of money that some of these influencers are making but like during COVID I feel like there was a lot of money to invest in influencers and then companies realized oh wow we can truly pay them anything and so now they're not investing as much in influencers monetarily and if they are the margins are very very low so I think this like rise and boom of the influencers made it seem so luxurious and amazing I don't think that exists anymore I think if you were to get into the influencer world now I don't think you would have the same monetary success that like existed in that point in time am I against people becoming influencers no because I also think the whole influencer world has truly allowed specifically

like women to be business owners and to make their own money and to not have to like work for a company and truly work for them for themselves in a way that we have never seen before and I think that is really beautiful and amazing but also I think you should understand that becoming like one of these big famous amazing uh million dollar influences influencers is rare and it's not going to happen to me so do I think it's going to happen to you probably not and I hate to be the bearer of bad news here but like you got to get fucking you got to get real you know and if I were to give you any sort of advice if you want to become an influencer the whole point of the job is to post I know you're like what I have to actually put myself online and bare my soul to everybody

absolutely that is the whole point of the job the influencers that you see nowadays the ones that pop off are the ones who it's like you can't escape and the reason you can't escape them is because they're posting 50 fucking times a day they're posting over and over and over and over and over again they don't care if it doesn't get any traction they don't care what people think about them there is this sense of like you have to truly bury yourself to the world and get over that fear in order to kind of garner that facial recognition and then garner a following and I don't think a lot of people have that in them and if you want to stay anonymous and you just want to consume content I don't fucking blame you there's a lot of stress behind being a public figure and

having your life out there and if that's not something you want to do if you're not chalked up for the influencer life that is okay that is okay we honestly do not need any more influencers we don't I think a lot of people who want to become influencers truly like I think it's becoming like the Mary Kay of our generation where it's like I am making money based off sales you essentially are a Mary Kay associate going house to house or phone to phone in the influencer world and you're selling products but you're making only a portion of it I think that's what we see most influencers do nowadays and is there a lot of money in it no is there stability in it no is there support in it really not really so can you even have a 401k no I see all of my friends who

work for companies who have matching 401ks like stock investment taxes are taken out already they don't have to think about it and i get very jealous i get very jealous i get very jealous of that because wow that is a lot of money that are being that is being thrown at them a lot of stability oh my god you have insurance that you don't have to pay for yourself wow like i know it's coming out of your paycheck or whatever but it is extremely cheaper to have your company pay for your insurance and have it come out of your paycheck than you finding your own insurance and paying for it every single month my insurance is 350 as the independent contractor and my friend's insurance every month with the same benefits actually they probably get better better benefits

it's like 150 there's a lot of pros and cons to it but i think people see the flashy lifestyle the luxuriousness of it all of these select few influencers and they're like i want to do that i can become that i don't think it is as good as they're putting it on to be obviously their job is to make it look really fucking awesome and really fucking nice and like they're living the best life that is their job babe of course it looks that way do i think it is that way behind the scenes absolutely not absolutely not but yes if you want to become an influencer and that is your life's dream that is your purpose who am i here to sit here and shit on that dream if you want to do it all you got to do is post there's probably a 10 chance that when you are posting

constantly it gets picked up it gets traction you then become influencer flame famous it is a gamble it is the same as sitting at a slot machine and putting in money and hoping it pays off i do think it is very random what the algorithm chooses to pick up and what it doesn't i think is very random what you know people who are consuming content choose to pick up and who doesn't you know it's a major risk absolutely and being in this line of work I have to know that and I have to take precaution knowing that like I love doing this podcast but absolutely I know the world can fall out from underneath me and I not may not be able to do this for the rest of my life and I'm not going to put all of my eggs in one basket I'm going to do this because it fulfills

my soul and I'm going to have a good time doing this and yeah I will work the boring job on the side to actually pay rent and all those fun things I think that's what most influencers are doing that you're seeing especially the ones who are like not brand safe if I were to start all over and you want to become a successful influencer and this is like a one percent chance of this actually working this is what i would do a i would post a bajillion times a day every single platform i'm talking tiktok instagram reels girl i don't give a fuck post a bajillion times a day it's scary yes but ultimately that is what you got to do post as much as you can as often as you can most importantly if you want to make money you got to be brand safe these brands got to

understand that you are not a risk that you are you know not necessarily even a human being that you can just plaster their brand on your face and it translates well and people will buy it that's truly all they care about they do not care about you as a human being they just want to know I mean especially like most of these big brands they just want to know that you're going to sell things so I would stay brand friendly if you can which means kind of putting aside your humanism a little bits and your personality a little bit and the chances of like that getting picked up like I said pretty low but if you get there and you can make those connections and you know you are brand safe I do think there's money in it but I don't think like I said there's as much money as we are

used to seeing especially during the COVID days where it's like flown out for a brand sponsorship I'm making a bajillion dollars for a sponsorship I just don't think that exists anymore and I think we are kind of gonna see a crash of it all where we saw the crash in the Mary Kay where people kind of realized oh you know I mean great brand but also there's other things out there I don't think it is a job field that I would recommend to everybody but if it is something that you are passionate about I would say if you want to make money you got to fake it you've got to not be yourself and you gotta you know brand safe like I said but I do think there is a very beautiful side of it where you can like become a creator I think that's very different if you want to become

a creator online an influencer is very different than a creator influencers brand safe all about the money don't give a fuck they are putting their best foot forward they are faking it till they make it abso-fucking-lutely they are just pushing content they don't care what it is as long as it is engaging and it is out there their job's done now I do think being a creator is very fulfilling I think is there any money in it absolutely fucking not but if you are a passionate individual who wants to make things especially online things or you you make products you're an artist I think being a creator can be very fulfilling I have such a fun fucking time doing this and if you want to start a silly little podcast with your friends just for funsies you don't care how many

views you get do it there's nothing stopping you if it fills your soul then abso-fucking-lutely if you you know have a small business that you are trying to promote and you're a little afraid to post like lean into that authenticity and that creative side and just share with the world what you're doing i think there's something so beautiful and amazing in that and truly i have found some really amazing creators simply through them bearing their soul and their process and wanting to share that with the world and I think that is so cool and ultimately like those are the people that I connect with more than anybody else I don't really follow any influencers for that reason I can see the fakeness I'm sure you can as well I do follow a lot a lot of creators and the method

to the madness of influencers versus creators is very different influencers very fake very much so pushing a product very much so holding themselves and their soul back in order to be brand friendly in order to make money it's a very lifeless process there's money in it sure but it's rare that you're going to hit those like levels of achievement where you're making millions now if you want to become a creator and you just want to share your life online and you want to live authentically and you want to create amazing things and get artistic with it i think that is so beautiful and i think you should absolutely go for it don't let anybody else you know get in your head and tell you that it's not worth it or yet that you're not doing a good job don't let the

numbers get to you feed your soul if it's feeding your soul that's all that matters make that youtube video make that vlog make that podcast film that fun little video that you've always wanted to do who cares as long as you're having a good time I think that's all that matters now like I said have a good time do I think there's money in being a creator no I think you'll make some duh but I don't think it'll be like a life-changing amount where you're like I have so much in savings that my grandkids grandkids won't have to work do you know what I mean I don't think there's that kind of money in there think you can live a comfortable life absolutely but you gotta kind of ask yourself am i gonna fake it am i gonna be a influencer or

am i going to be a creator and listen to your gut listen to that instinct don't listen to anybody else outside of you do what feels right but i do kind of want to break the facade of that glamorous influencer life that obviously they do push on you i think it is a rarity i think a lot of it is fake i think there's a lot of credit card debt involved especially with the rising influencers who are trying to live a life outside of their means and i don't think there's that so much money as people view in it anymore and yeah i hate to break that facade for you but like from one girl to another i just want to be real speaking of i guess someone said do you ever see yourself in another field of work yeah definitely i think i can ultimately do anything and i think

that's so fun one of the practices in the artist's way was um write down 10 different jobs that you could see yourself doing and allow yourself to like imagine yourself in that position and it could be anything it could be astronaut it could be um chef it could be school teacher it could be trash man does not matter write down like 10 different jobs and you in those jobs and how you feel in those jobs and allow yourself to live in an imagination a little bit and I think that is was such a fun practice because I could truly see myself doing anything and I understand how some people could have a hard time with that practice because it's like I think a lot of people have these limiting beliefs of well I couldn't do that I can't do that I don't want to do that but it's

like sometimes but you gotta sometimes you gotta and as a girl who has been working since the age of 12 like clocked in paycheck since the age of 12 i know i don't know how it's legal but i have been i have always had this mindset of like well i could do it like fuck it i'm flexible i'm a quick learner i'm happy and helpful like you put me in any position i can do it i have done so many different jobs in this lifetime that honestly like I would be just as happy doing this for the rest of my life as I would being like an art teacher or a daycare teacher or a private nanny or a personal assistant or a therapist or a florist an artist whatever it is I could be happy and fulfilled doing any of those jobs just as I am doing this one and I know that because I'm a

passionate person and you put me in any situation any job any field like I will ultimately give it my all and I think that really translates into just like being a good worker and succeeding in any field you're in you know trying to do the best you can no matter what even if you know what's going on or not simply being there and doing what you can and being receptive to feedback being receptive to advice and trying to stand ten toes down being the best that you possibly can you will succeed ultimately truly now I understand in this job market getting a job in general might be a little harder than that but like as soon as you get in there like be passionate go after it like if you're in the situation you might as well find enjoyment wherever you are like sure I'm

serving bartending running a restaurant right now and is it exactly what I want to be doing for the rest of my life nor no not at all but am I gonna show up and be miserable every single time I clock in hell no I don't have time to be miserable I don't have time to sit and sulk and complain like no one likes that person at work we're all here trying to at least have a good time and make a little bit of a bag and get home so you might as well be that person who's like uplifting and supporting while you're there the worst co-workers are the ones who are like about to quit and they just hate every single second of every moment that they're there and they make it everybody else's problem hell no we don't have time for that you show up you smile you have a little laugh you

be a good co-worker then clock out and go home and then you can complain you know but yeah I could see myself doing many different things I I never hold myself back when it comes to purposes or achievements and like I said those purposes will come to me in due time once you handle the purpose you're in you will find a new one in the future and sure maybe I'll be 70 and I'll be a art school teacher for kindergartners maybe I'll be a private therapist maybe I'll be astrologist maybe I'll be a florist maybe I'll be a gardener who fucking knows but right now I know what my purpose is I know what I need to achieve and in the future future Hannah will handle it she will come to that conclusion she will handle that future purpose that future career I know I can do anything

truly but I know most importantly what I need to do now help I think TikTok has ruined any sense creativity and work ethic i had any ideas you gotta go cold turkey you gotta go cold turkey it's like being like help alcohol has ruined my life what do i do duh stop the alcohol help um cigarettes are making me my lung collapse what do i do stop the cigarettes whenever you recognize oh my god a this thing is ruining me and it's causing b this bad thing to happen the c answer is to stop doing it and i know that's not the answer you want to hear but unfortunately it is the real life answer of like that's just what you gotta do and i do think the universe always rewards like hard things with positive outcomes um i just think that is like

the ultimate formulation to good things is like doing the hard thing making space for newness and then having that good thing enter that space so if you feel like oh wow this thing is ruining my life girl it probably is and you probably need to cut it out a bit now weaning yourself off anything whether it's like drugs alcohol sex tiktok whatever your addiction is um you have two options you can either a go cold turkey but i feel like that's kind of hard to sustain or b you can slowly wean yourself off of it so i think if you start with just like screen time allowing yourself to only use tiktok in certain situations um allowing yourself to use tiktok maybe for a certain amount of time a day like you get your five minutes scrolling in the morning and then your five

minutes scroll after work boom that's it eventually you'll stop needing it as much because you'll realize how surface level and non-engaging it is when you're doing the hours and hours and hours of scrolling it's going to feel very addictive because there's so much content to consume but when you're only consuming a short amount you'll realize like i did this to myself and i was like oh wow this is not fulfilling at all like i don't actually enjoy sitting here and scrolling like there's other things that i would rather be doing um and you can only realize that if you take time away so if you need a break girl give yourself a break help i believe in manifestation very strongly but my boyfriend says i'm objectively wrong for believing oh your boyfriend's kind of

blame or he just has not been his eyes have not been opened to like the beauty of energetic exchange manifestation is real the sooner you realize that the better like for good or bad i realized manifestation was real when i was manifesting bad things in my life when i was like negative self-talk about me about other people about the world around me oh i don't deserve these things blah blah blah blah blah negative negative negative guess what guess what that brings guess what I manifested negative shit and then I was like oh fuck like wow life's so negative you get to a point where you're like all right let's switch it up let's try something new like fuck it what do we have to lose and then I started being positive started doing gratuity

journaling just giving thanks to the universe seeing the light having big ideas and not holding myself back you know letting myself be a little delusional in the sense where it's like I didn't know how to think positively so I went for the grandeur of it all and then I realized whoa life got really good really fucking quickly how the hell did that happen oh mindset I think manifestation is all about mindset truly I think manifestation is mindset it's belief in self it's belief in you know the universe around you belief in good I think it's important and anybody who's like oh manifestation is not real is kind of fucking stupid because every single person on this universe has gone out there and been like I want that thing I'm gonna go after that thing

sure it doesn't exist in reality right now but I'm gonna create it and I'm gonna go and get it and then they do it that is manifestation every single person here who is listening to this has done that before whether it was a big thing or a small thing they have done it so to kind of deny it is just like him being a weirdo man who hates things that girls believe and i hate people like that because like how dare you not want to have fun in this life but also like if he doesn't want to open himself up to good things that's his problem i don't think you should also make it your problem manifestation is a thousand percent real and it truly all comes from just putting good out and receiving good back we have an abundance of energy in ourselves and when we whatever we put

out there we then kind of open up space within ourselves for the universe to give whatever we put out there back whether it's equal sometimes it's tenfold and in order to attract that goodness and fill that space back up with good things you have to put good out there if you put negative out there and you put negative on people you put negative on yourself you put limiting beliefs out there you open up that space and the universe fills it back in tenfold with negative things so if you can be intentional about the energy that you use the energy that you give out and making space and room for good energy i think that is literally manifestation and i do think you can achieve anything belief in self is the strongest belief that there is if you're going

to believe in anybody believe in you believe you can do good things believe that you are a good person and stand by yourself no matter what but yeah if you want the quick tip to manifestation girl just be good give good stay positive try and be a kind person the bravest people are the kindest people and truly making that space for good things to then fill you up is so so important but with that being said i love you all so very much happy tuesday i hope you have a fantastic rest of your week if you want to see more from me come join the patreon patreon.com we do an extra episode every week where i answer every single one of your questions if you want to see what i'm up to follow me on instagram at hannah marlene i have a bunch of

fun new things coming out i love hanging out with you guys every week it's such a amazing wonderful dose of positivity that i really need in my life especially with going through stressful things so hopefully I was able to give you all that refreshing energizing episode that you needed this week but with that being said stay sexy stay sane and I'll see you all so soon