Smoke Sesh - living the simple life, inner teen & therapy

Episode Date: May 13, 2025

hellooo hotties and welcome back to another episode of smoke sesh! we have so much to catch up on as I had a pretty busy busy weekend, we talk house shows, saying yes to everything, getting outside, party buses, nurse slander, mothers day, living life, adulting, early 20's, therapy, mid 20's mental breakdown, summer flings, leaving it in the past and appreciating it for what it is, saying yes to life, lost in life, how to really be good in bed, summer plans, running away to the forest, weed anxiety, overcoming anxiety, distractions, actions vs words, how to know when a man is lying to you, to breakup or not breakup, living the simple life, sti's, holding conversations, moving and growing up, breaking laziness and getting tf up, career change, summer jobs, living for the little things, bad vibes and trusting intuition about people, inner teen, emo emotions and healing your inner darkness plus much much more! if you want to see more from me join my patreon at patreon.com/smokeseshshawty and follow the instagram for more hannahmarlene, love you all and chat soon! MUAH!

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more time connecting brands with the moments and fandoms that matter most. Learn more at Accenture.com slash Spotify. listen everybody needs a fairy godmother you know just somebody to look out for them some people call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sash so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all hello hotties of the world and welcome back to another sexy little episode of smoke sesh my name's hannah your host and i'm so excited to be back with you guys you guys i have been on my

adult bullshit game i don't know i don't know there's just i'm turning 26 i'm having a lot of realizations. I'm making doctor's appointments. I'm doing shadow work. It feels a little bit all too much. There's also a full moon today. So your girl is kind of going through it. But I think when I'm going through it, it does kind of make for the best episodes because I have so many life lessons to share. So please strap in, buckle up for a little bit of a silly fun episode today, you guys oh my god the last episode it's uh it was titled like frontal lobe development my dumb ass I spelled frontal lobe development wrong so I put frontal lobe and I absolutely would have not seen it unless one of you guys dm me so shout out to you girly thank god one of us

can spell um but maybe my frontal lobe isn't fully developed because the fact that I completely spelled it wrong and uploaded it is crazy um I've always had a problem with spelling though I remember in first grade over summer break we you know not learning anything I'm outside in the woods playing around rolling around in the mud in dirt I am not doing any homework babe I'm not even picking up a pencil that's for fucking sure and I remember it was like okay we're going back to school tomorrow can you fill out you know your introduction paper paperwork you know the fun little paperwork where it's like what's your name what's your favorite color what's your favorite food and I went to go write my name down and I started having a panic attack because

I could not spell my name bitch it's three letters three letters total six but three letters it's spelled the same way front and back I was like I don't know how to spell my mom had like a full circle moment because she's a first grade teacher I think she was like what the fuck my daughter doesn't know how to spell her own name this is sad this is sad mamas anyways so if you ever see anything spelled wrong that's on me genuinely my brain just does not work that way also it's so funny how the episodes that it's always like this when you're a content creator it's always like the content you make that you're like wow this is amazing this is fantastic you know this is gonna be like it's gonna blow up like it really touched my heart so i think it'll

touch somebody else's that shit never does good never ever ever ever it's so funny because the the ones that do do good that get like 10,000 50,000 100,000 plus listens watches whatever even a million is the ones where you're like I don't know I don't know about that one but I'm just gonna upload it fuck it like let's just I made it I created it what do we have to lose let's just put it up those are the ones that really do the best which is last episode last episode I felt like yeah you know maybe I wasn't on my you know best game ever but you guys seem to really enjoy it and took some life lessons out of it so thank you for listening and thank you for understanding the riddles that my brain likes to put out there instead of sentences um it means

the world to me and i really appreciate all of you guys um also someone messaged me so i've been doing this the spotify ads thank you thank you thank you if you listen to the spotify ads they do pay me it is one of the only ways i get paid for this podcast i think technically the ads only play if you're not a free listener so thank you if you're not a free listener just for sitting through those really genuinely appreciate it but also i am not in control of the ads they play which is also a big reason why i was like maybe i don't want to do it because like why the fuck would i ever trust spotify to choose my ads for me and someone messaged me was like girl the first ad that played in your most recent episode was a Trump promotional ad I about lost my goddamn mind

I was immediately in my email emailing my Spotify rep like bitch what the fuck is this what is going on why are you allowing this why the fuck is it on my podcast and how the fuck do I ban that motherfucker right now and she she was like no no because I was worried that I was putting out republican vibes and then maybe it was like ai targeting me she's like no we the targeted ads are based on the listeners the same way like youtube ads are like all of my youtube ads are all about pretty litter and the cat robot litter box which i definitely do not want which is so funny because like of course all my targeted ads are about cats but i don't want trump anywhere fucking near me so if you hear a trump ad fuck that motherfucker i hope he d-i-e-s yes i said it

um and no i did not approve that ad so sorry if you have to hear from him i was really hoping this would be a safe space but yeah i got that dm and i was like oh my god oh my god i didn't even know that was an option what the actual fuck what the fuck but yes thank you for listening to those ads they do pay quite well and hopefully i will be able to create some new fun content with my new upcoming free time here soon i was about to be like i really haven't been up to a lot but if i'm being honest i have been way busier than i ever have in my entire life no i'm just kidding but i mean busier than i have been for the past six months at least uh the one thing about summer is like if you want to have a good summer you have to say yes to things oh you're tired oh you don't

want to go outside or you don't want to get up from your couch well guess what you're gonna have a shitty summer it just is what it is those events that you want to go to but you're too tired to go to get up go to them you're going to have a good time i promise you you're going to enjoy your time there but you have to get the fuck up and go it's gonna suck you know putting yourself together getting ready driving there but as soon as you are in that event in that space at that place you will have a good time and that's how you create memories do not let your laziness overshadow what it is to just experience life you know what I mean so my weekend looked like Thursday um my boyfriend's friend was hosting like a house show at his place and they have like their garages in

the back so the bands just drove around to the back and then the backyard was where the house show was in the garage um it was like a local punk show nothing crazy um but I posted a video of everybody moshing and the girls were like I'm scared for you are you okay yes girl like a house show is where it's at you want to have fun you want to get into like the degenerate vibes and just like experience life go to a house show and you find your local house shows by like going to maybe bigger shows at more established venues and then just meeting people looking for flyers getting to know the bands and I guarantee the bands are going to be playing house shows around you house shows are underrated bring back house shows love a venue but like I love the degenerate

mess that happens and the more stories that happen at just a place that's a little bit more unlawful you know what I mean but yeah me my boyfriend went there they were like grilling hot dogs out back and putting them on skate decks and handing them around like you know what i'll eat a skate deck hot dog fuck it first hot dog of the season let's go i drank a shit ton of quirks there i was trying not to get too fucked up but like to be honest you kind of do have to be fucked up to deal with that mess but we had a good time i wasn't out too too late because the next day my friend was renting a party bus because she had her last day nursing at the hospital she was at before she goes to anesthesiology school so it was kind of like a little bit of a birthday

celebration for her as well as a little bit of a goodbye celebration and it was also nurse's day at the k so it's like perfect she rented a party bus pull up there's like 50 people on this fucking party bus and also we were doing borgs for the party bus I have not been keeping up with like the college drinking games and what you do for drinking in college and the new thing or not even new it's been around probably since the year I left I left college fairly early for being honest is borgs and essentially it's just you take like a gallon jug of water you pour out half the water fill the rest up with vodka and then just whatever flavoring you want so i did mio energy and sugar-free pink lemonade packets bitch i was like i'm only gonna drink one third of it by the

end of the party bus my borg was empty it was empty yeah but the party bus pulled up to the royals game i didn't realize party buses can also like tailgate i've never done a tailgate off a party bus so they pulled up to the royals game they had like a pop-up tent folding chairs um a table and we just stood out in the sunshine and giggled and had a grand old time went to the royals game i think i ate like three hot dogs chugged some more alcohol enjoyed just the beautiful summer weather giggled with some new people met some new people you know what i would like to say as well happy nurses week um I personally am doing my part for the nurses by never ever going to the hospital because goddamn y'all have it hard and I hate I hate the rhetoric of oh all of the mean

bitchy girls the worst girls you knew in high school are becoming nurses no they're not babe I hate to break it to you no you're no they're not the worst girls you knew in high school are real estate agents the worst girls you knew in high school are selling insurance you know what i mean nurses are so selfless and like yeah they're gonna be a little bit of a bitch because if you had to deal with even an ounce of what they're dealing with from the general public you would lose your goddamn mind lose your fucking mind shout out to my nurses out there kudos mama you go through so much and you do not get paid enough nurses teachers any sort of public so anybody who's working with the general public girl you can be working in an H&M you deserve a

raise yes you do because people have lost their goddamn minds and we are forced to put up with so much bullshit that is just not necessary and guess what every nurse on that party bus was so fun so kind so inclusive getting to know you what's your name how are you you know wanting to just know more about each other and I found that to be so wholesome and just so energetic so I'll ride for my nurses that's for goddamn sure and then after we walked back to the party bus and whoever made it back to the party bus which was about 15 people people were dropping like flies we then went out to a karaoke bar which was so fun my friend rented a karaoke room and we just screamed our little little hearts off in this karaoke bar I woke up the next morning and

my throat was like raw from how much I was screaming into that microphone girl get me off I needed to go home luckily I wasn't out too late I've realized when it comes to going out as long as I'm home before one I'm usually pretty good I'm able to get a good amount of rest where I don't feel too shitty the next day and also because I'm going to bed a little bit early I'm waking up a little bit early so I feel like I'm not losing my day completely but then the next day here's the thing if you're going out and you're drinking and you're getting so incredibly fucked up to the point where you know you're gonna be so incredibly hung over the next day you might as well work you might as well work what are you gonna do sit at home and suffer hell no you might

as well suffer on the clock and get paid for your suffering you know what I mean so I pulled up to work two and five canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar raised matters on september 19th join thousands in toronto for the princess margaret cancer foundation walk challenge yourself friends and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life saving research together we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca When you're

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ground running. Bring it with SAP Grow. AI Cloud ERP for any size business. and half the people were missing half the people at my job were missing hello I thought we're supposed to be here working why is nobody here so Saturday kind of sucked in that aspect but once again when I'm hungover the best way to do it is just to like lock in and try and make some money and at least distract myself a little bit because if I'm sitting at home I am completely and solely focused on the suffering but if I'm at work or something I'm at least distracted by

the annoying people in front of me or the person complaining and asking for the manager like girl he does not give a fuck i'm not getting the manager i'm so sorry babe but saturday night flew by because we were short-staffed per usual and i was just hung over and i took the biggest section because i was like i just need to i need to mentally get through this somehow and then after getting home at like 12 30 from work i woke up bright and early on sunday for mother's day you know who else doesn't get paid enough mothers yep kudos mama to my mothers you are incredible you are so powerful you are so strong you are amazing you literally are otherworldly the fact that women have a portal within their bodies to be able to create life and bring it forth

yes men should be on their knees kissing our feet and i don't know why the fuck they're not as if they didn't as if they forgot we're fucking divine creatures yeah bitch you deserve all the praise in the world you deserve all the love in the world i love you thank you for being a mother if no one has told you but i woke up made about 18 pounds of bacon candied bacon because my mom made a bunch of casseroles someone else brought you know cinnamon rolls fresh fruit it's like what the fuck do I bring meat that's what I'm bringing so I made candy bacon pulled myself together made it over to my mom's house bright and early for brunch chugged a couple mimosas hung out with my family sitting in the sunshine it's finally getting hot it's gonna be a hot hot summer I'm

ready to go lay in the sun get a little crispy get my gets a little bit of a sunburn there's no better feeling and yeah that's kind of how I'm kicking off the summer so far listen am I tired today yes am I exhausted am I a little burnt out yes but looking back on like the long weekend I had I had so much fun I had so much fun and I'm so incredibly glad that I was like you know what fuck it I'll just go to the thing you know what do I want to go probably not but I'm gonna go I'm gonna get myself together I'm gonna pull myself together I'm gonna make my borg I'm gonna go to this house show I'm gonna fight my way through the pit I'm going to have a good time and I did those are memories that i'm gonna stick with for the rest of my life that i will always look back

fondly of summer of 25 and all i had to do was literally say yes so easy so easy and guess what if you are not if you don't have friends who plan things you can be the planner like i'm planning something right now for my birthday it just takes one person to be like okay i have everything figured out show up at this time people will show up i guarantee it people will show up sometimes you got to become the planner but what kind of summer do you want to live what do you want to say yes to what do you want to experience go out go do it go live life life is meant to be lived you guys it might be a little exhausting but damn isn't that the point of it all but yeah that's really all i have to catch you guys up on let's see coming up oh my god i made a women's health

appointment ah scary please if you're a woman you need to be doing your yearly checkups yes ma'am yes you do take care of yourself physically mentally all the things you need to make sure you are in check and taken care of women's health is protection it is safety find a doctor you like i didn't realize you could you know how you people do rate my professor i didn't realize people do that for doctors as well so i took like a full day this was a couple years ago when i was looking for my new doctor my new women's health doctor i took a full day to like look at all the doctors within my insurance and like look at the reviews and finally i found one and she is the best doctor ever i love her endlessly and i'm honestly so excited to go see her

but i haven't had my period and i don't know if my iud is out of place so i was like i fear fear it's time for a women's health checkup so i will be doing that on wednesday because i'm so incredibly brave and i just know it needs to be done i haven't been in two years oops but i didn't have insurance and i finally do now so might as well use it to the best of my ability hopefully i have no surprise pop-up information next week hopefully everything's in place and functioning okay amen but i have that coming up may in general just going to be a very busy month for me i have that and then also i don't know the scorpio full moon today is really kind of fucking with my emotions in a way that I haven't had them fucked with in a second more so because

I am learning to address maybe the darker side of life I've spent a lot of my time I don't know I feel like I went too far into the darker side so it became a survival tactic of mine to really only focus on the positive and that I mean did its job you know I was able to see more positive things to live a positive life to kind of push off the darkness from overtaking me and be able to balance things out a bit more but now I realize I've completely neglected that side of myself and although it's harder to deal with that side of myself it is something that I do need to address and I am brave enough to say that I don't think I can address those things alone and I do think I need professional help to do so so I'm also starting therapy in two weeks like real sit down

fuck the zoom call I can't do a zoom call I need to be in person to hold myself accountable but therapy therapy real therapy you know I don't know with my 26 coming up I'm doing a lot of reflection and luckily I'm not doing reflection in like a panic attack way I'm doing it in like okay so where is this next chapter leading us like where do I see myself this next year or you know maybe in this next half of my 20s and I kind of realized um my my early 20s I was really faking being an adult and that's the thing about your early 20s is that's what it's supposed to be you're supposed to be kind of faking it till you make it because you have no fucking clue what's going on insurance I don't know Roth IRA I don't know rent I don't know like all of these different

things that you're supposed to be doing figuring out jobs internships college going back to school whatever it may be you're kind of just faking it until you kind of figure it figure it out but once you hit that mid-20s point you kind of do have like the basics figured out you've laid the groundwork you're at least like one level above where you have that stability and now you're able to focus on other things and I'm realizing now I have a little bit more mental space to maybe work on the blockages that I'm holding internally that are holding me back emotionally physically spiritually or whatever you want to put it and I do think a lot of that is going to be just like mental gymnastics of me working with a therapist and working through those darker side of things

i realized this when i was doing the artist's way i haven't done an artist's way update i fell off we're gonna be honest i completely fell off um i made it to like the fourth week and then that fourth week is when my life just went completely haywire at the beginning of april when my car got stolen my cat had an emergency surgery again i paid like all of my money to taxes like it was crazy busy I was working over time it was just so overwhelming and I got kind of caught up with life but I do think the artist way is about creativity yes but the activities that the artist way was having me do were things that I was already doing within my daily life so I felt like the activities didn't make a huge impact on me if you don't do a lot of art I think it can make a big impact on you

but it was like the journaling activities um the just once a week artist's day I was already kind of doing those things so it didn't feel like a huge major change I mean it was good to feel committed to those things but what was really fucking me up was it has you do creative art and then also it makes you do this shadow work that I was not used to doing of talking about like the inner critic and where did that stem from who's somebody who are always put you down in life like what negative emotional baggage are you carrying on from them or what things did they teach you that you could still believe in but no is not true like this deep internal work that I was not used to doing and it kind of set me into a bit of a mental spiral and I'm realizing

just because that emotional work is hard doesn't mean it's not important and in fact it probably means that it's more important but I am brave enough to say that I literally I don't think I can do that shit alone I think I do need somebody else to help me work through those emotions and also more importantly I think it's important to have a third party perspective when it comes to those things I even told my boyfriend yesterday I was like genuinely no offense like love ya but there are some things that I just simply cannot tell you or I feel like I can't talk to anybody about because you do know me fully as a person you know who I am you have this preconceived idea of who I am and I do think when I speak about these things I need it to be with somebody who

I mean sees me but more so sees me in a scientific sense in an understanding sense without all these preconceived ideas and I think that's when a therapist can come in very very handy not only do they have ratings on doctors but they also have ratings on therapists so if you're like I don't know which therapist to try go to psychology today I think that's where I went and I just looked in therapists in my area and looked at their reviews looked at what they specialized in I kind of just picked one that sounded good to me or like could help me with what I want to work through this one specifically works with like childhood trauma bpd emotional regulation and then they do a lot of like dbt therapy and emdr therapy which I've never done but I'm excited to

try so yes that will be a fun new brave big step in my life I feel like this next era of my life will really be kind of healing my inner teen um I've realized I have lived for my inner child for a long time which was just seeking freedom and seeking just like the truth of what I want and going after those things and my inner teen's a little bit more emotional she's a little bit more moody and emo and I think I'm gonna have to do a lot of emotional work coming up here soon but I think it'll be so worth it I think it'll make me into a better person and I think it'll also make my anxiety a little bit less intensive because recently my anxiety has been out of control in a way that I haven't felt in a long time not because I feel like my life is going wrong

the funny thing about mental illness and anxiety is it can be based in nothing at all but you can still be feeling it and that's something I also want to address but if you're somebody who's like I am also feeling overwhelmed with a certain emotion or maybe there's certain issues that I want to tackle in life that I'm a little bit scared to you know work on and I don't feel comfortable doing it alone I highly recommend therapy like I said look for somebody that you think will mesh well with you I highly recommend in-person therapy when I do virtual therapy I feel like I'm more willing to lie and not lie in a malicious scent but lie that I'm okay because it doesn't feel personal when i am there in person i feel more connected emotionally and physically

to the environment at hand and to the emotional state at hand also if you're doing therapy the therapy freeze is a real thing where you go to therapy and everything you've been thinking about the week before just completely slips out of your mind and you sit down and she asks how you're feeling and you're like honestly great like sure you might be in that moment but babe all the things you've thought up the week before write them down have like a notes list of topics you want to discuss things you want to handle before going in I think that's very helpful so then you don't have that therapy freeze when you go in for your appointment and therapy can be expensive work with your insurance maybe to find somebody who is within your provider range but I know this is

going to be an investment and if there's one thing I'm going to invest my money in let it be me you know I'll stop my online shopping I'll stop whatever random spending going out to eat if it means that I can become a little bit more mentally put together and understanding of myself the funny thing about growing up is it's constantly leveling up even when I feel like you know I'm having a hard time on a level you will complete it and move forward it really is kind of a video game and my early 20s kind of felt like the adventure part of the video game where you're collecting fun items you're talking to people talking you know going on an adventure storytelling things like that and I feel like this next one I'm coming up to is kind of like the big boss

level where it's like okay girl you better lock in and fight your hardest so that will be very fun and very exciting but I know all the hard work will pay off and it'll be so much more worth it and life will become a little bit easier if I dare to just put the work in on myself but yeah that's all I have coming up my birthday's coming up I'm very excited for that I've been planning that and what me and my girls are going to do it's going to be such a beautiful day I think we're just going to go to the pool and lay out in some sunshine eat some good food have a little drink enjoy our time what more can you ask for honestly it really is the little things that matter the most and yeah sorry for the long update but girl I've been booked and busy this summer we got a lot

coming up and you know what it's been good say yes to those things go out enjoy life life is meant to be experienced all it takes is a little bit of bravery to get out there and to maybe try new things to put yourself in new situations and to do the best you can but with that being said enough of my rambling let's get into your guys's questions we'll go through a little bit of like a question roulette here um and try and get as many done as we can hooked up with someone across the country and can't get over it help uh okay listen not everybody is the love of your life and i do think you will have seasons with people and i think what's beautiful about like a hookup or like oh i went to this country and i had this fling or i went to this place and i had this little summer

fling or whatever is that experience exists in that time and space forever and you will always be able to look fondly back on that experience you can have good experiences and leave them in the past and in fact i highly encourage you to do so especially if you're like you know that experience was perfect for that summer but i understand that it can't live on throughout my entire life like it's just not going to work realistically you can still look back in fondness and be like i had a great time with that person we had some great freaky times together he showed me the country we had a ball a blast you know it was like a summer romance movie lived out in real life you will always have that memory to look back on and to love and to cherish and to be proud of

yourself for you know doing and experiencing but also you can understand that that is not something that can live on forever naturally some people come through your life for seasons some people come through your life for a week some people come to your life for forever and you need to learn which is which and understand that you can appreciate a situation for what it is without needing it to continue on let that person experience you for a season and move on with your life continue forward how to discover yourself at 26 when you feel lost and like there are so many options in life start saying yes start saying yes you have choice paralysis you kind of have life paralysis right now where you're like well i could do this but i could do

this but i could do this but i could do this me right now there's something about your mid-20s that gets you to dream a little bit more because you realize wow i did so much in my early 20s impressive i truly can go out there and do whatever i want but then you start dreaming a little harder and then you get that choice paralysis of like there's so many things i want to do start with one try it out say yes get out there put yourself out there if it doesn't work it doesn't work you have so many other dreams to go out and try I guarantee they will always be waiting for you stand strong beside yourself but just say yes and try things out stop sitting on your couch and trying to think your way through a perfect situation it's not going to happen you have to

get out there and just experience try once you put yourself in a situation of like okay well maybe I want to maybe I want to be a nurse but once you know maybe you talk to some nurses or you start school you start maybe watching a couple youtube videos on what the experience is like as a nurse you will realize quickly okay is this something i'm passionate about or was this just like a fleeing idea then move forward but don't let the paralysis keep you from living life there are so many lives out there to be lived you need to go out and take a hold of them try them on see if they fit move forward am i actually good in bed or is it just in my head how to really tap into good sex um leave the performance aspect out of it i don't think it's about performance it truly

is about pleasure so i think you can be good in bed and not have to be swinging from the ceilings including eight million toys putting on an hour and a half performance you don't have to put on a porn star performance to be good in bed are you giving your partner pleasure are they receiving pleasure are you able to like tease them or play it out or like hit the spots that they enjoy can you read your partner that's how you're good at sex there is no special trick there is no special oh well you can do this thing or i have the hack to a perfect day in bed no no no no can you read your partner's body language and pleasure and can you give it to them that way you know it's the same with like love languages i think sex is all about love languages and sexual love languages

are gonna be a little bit different than like interpersonal love languages obviously you know how they tick what they enjoy what turns them on everybody's different everybody's different learn their kinks learn what they like that's how you become good in bed any summer plan ideas you give me so much hope and positivity you really are a fairy godmother oh love you queen um summer Summer activities, running away to the forest. The older I get, the more I understand why people completely move off grid and run away to be in the middle of the forest and speak to nobody. I think my dream has completely changed. I live in the city, love the city, but also I'm so ready to just be in the country, in the fields, in the forest, just out with nature. I love animals more

than I could ever love people. And I think my summer plans are just getting outside, being with nature being in the forest going it's almost strawberry season so going strawberry picking in May I want to go to like a strawberry festivals I want to go pick as much fresh fruit as I can from the local farms there's this tea making class coming up at a local herbary I want to go make teas I want to go connect with nature the owner of my restaurant has chickens I want to go out to his farm and go get some fresh eggs I want to go support local farmers market I want to learn how to make bread I want to go on hikes I want to go experience the nature around me that maybe I haven't been able to i want to go lay in the river i just want to be outside with nature when i tell

you every single day like literally right now i'm sure my neighbors are hearing this entire podcast but like welcome for the early viewing girls but i leave my front door open all day just because the fresh air is just so nice and crisp and beautiful right now take advantage of the weather it's going to be hot as balls coming up here soon so please for the love of god enjoy it before it's all humid and sweaty and gross out but yeah my summer plans are just being outside lizarding by the pool getting my tan on running around the forest like the fairy i am any tips you have for being less anxious while smoking weed illy so my anxiety condition like i said has been a little bit out of control and obviously that means when i smoke weed my anxiety gets a

little bit more out of control than I would like I cannot use weed to manage my anxiety it just will not happen I am one of the people who is more prone to more anxiety when I smoke obviously I think some people don't get that effect others do for me personally I do usually when I smoke it's like okay first 15 minutes I'm a bit anxious of course I'm very anxious but then after that 15 minutes it does kind of wear off strain also plays a factor sativas get me more anxious than indicas but now that my anxiety is a little bit out of control i feel like i've cut back on the smoking as you've noticed i haven't smoked with you guys in a second because i just feel like i get too in my head and i can't actually sit down and connect with you guys on a level that i would

like um and i am listen the drugs don't control my life i'm happy to leave that out for an episode if it means i can put out a good connective episode but also when it comes to like just smoking on my own I really try and build the aspect of a safe space when I'm in a safe space and I do get anxiety I'm able to calm myself down a little bit more so making sure that you know my house is clean I feel comfortable in it I'm not going to get anxious from anything around me I have like jazz music playing in the background that helps with my anxiety also I think when I get anxious in any aspect especially when it comes to the weed having something to do to distract your mind always helps if you're anxious and you're just sitting there scrolling scrolling

scrolling scrolling scrolling on your phone you are going to become even more anxious okay price your bodies in this tj maxx for me did you guys see that video she ate them up i know she was an active psychosis yes that is what active psychosis looks like but she kind of she kind of ate them up price your price your bodies here in this tj maxx for me oh my god what a good borg name price your borgs here in this tj maxx for me but yeah having something to do especially when you're high getting artsy doing some pen and paper watercolors painting and when it comes to doing art while you're high get abstract do not try and do realism you will get even more anxious or like i'm not doing it right whatever get abstract colors shapes have fun pull out the stickers you know

what i mean channel your inner child when you're doing art while high or my favorite thing to do is I get high I get anxious and then I just start doing the dishes all of a sudden all the laundry is done I've folded everything all of the dishes put away I've deep clean and mopped my kitchen because I'm like running away from the demons a little bit but do something that always helps with the anxiety why do boys never follow through he made a plan to hang yesterday but slept through it because he doesn't actually care and don't let him lie to you and be like no no babe no I do care because when a man is in love he will have eight alarms set to not miss that one date with you yep that's just the truth of it all and men will love to lie through their teeth to get you hanging

on by a by a thread you know what i mean girls they love to hit you with the no babe but i love you but i was gonna do this thing but i was gonna but i was gonna oh but but but but but what bitch but what words are just background noise i don't give a fuck about words what are his actions showing you is it showing you love is it showing you understanding is it showing you peace obviously fucking not especially if he made plans he initiated the plans and then fell through on them he does not give a fuck about you that is for sure please listen to me very clearly girls actions are everything are they showing you that they love you are they showing you that they appreciate and understand the value of your time no then they're a piece of shit and you need to

leave them in the dirt where they deserve very simple very simple oh should i break up with my boyfriend now or wait until my lease is up in august i will wait until your lease is up um yeah definitely not to be like a bitch who's dragging it on or to be like sly or shady in any sort of way but that awkwardness of having to live with your partner after you guys break up is like too much mentally I think you should just wait it out through the summer I know I know and is that mean of me to say I just think it's like don't rock the boat and then also like it's gonna make their life so much more difficult throughout the summer having to live with your ex and your life so you might as well just like keep the peace until you know you both have a good solid kind of out if you

know what I mean being okay with normal life I feel like I'm supposed to aim so high I just want to be happy. You know what? Two in five Canadians will hear the words, you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. Hear that?

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real the more the older i get the more i realize like the simple life really is for me i know i do like social media and you would think like the the average way that this would go for me is like keep getting followers keep gaining notoriety keep gaining fame maybe have like a tv show one day a talk show one day a radio show one day i really don't think that's where I'm going with this like I'm not fame hungry I'm not looking for more notoriety or anything like that I really am genuinely so happy with the community we've created here it is so incredibly positive and understanding it's a good amount of you girls here hello there's like a hundred thousand people here every month like are you fucking kidding me that's insane I am so happy

with everything that I have accomplished but the older I get the more I realize how much like stability and calm and peace is more important to me than anything else in life i drive by this little um like a daycare church daycare every single day and i see all the kids out playing and i think back to my high school days when i was a two-year-old teacher and i'm like you know what if everything fell through if all this fell through if every single person stopped listening I think I would be still be happy just being a two-year-old teacher like I think I would be happy living a simple life because it is so calming you have your routine down every day you have something to look forward to you have a job that you don't completely hate sure is it like CEO

oh you know outer space astronaut doctorate no it's not but also we don't have to always be those things that's what you want to be don't give up on that dream go become that thing but also if you don't aim or want to aim for these big things i don't think there's anything wrong with that if you're happy just being a school teacher for the rest of your life somebody's got to do it and in fact if you're passionate about it I highly recommend you doing it if if you're happy being the janitor period go become the janitor if you're happy working at a restaurant the rest of your life do it no one's stopping you as long as you're happy I think that's what's important and I think yeah if you don't aim high then like who cares as long as you're happy that's

all that matters and sometimes the simpler things do make people the happiest first sti confirmed any tips it's not that bad i swear just mortified emotionally real the older you get the more you realize everybody's on cocaine and also stis are so incredibly common because everybody's doing it raw that's why that's why i harp on you guys and it's for a reason because girl i've been where you are now to ask your partners when's the last time they've been tested to quiz them to wear that condom girl yes absolutely because sure in the long run STIs some of them are very easy to get rid of take a little pilly get a little shot whatever it is that you need but ultimately I mean sexual protection is very important and I want you guys to be sexually protected

with birth control making sure that your partner is a safe loving comforting partner making sure that their partner is taking care of themselves and also taking care of you to make sure you are sexually protected i think all those things are so incredibly important and very overlooked on i think the whole like casuality that people have instilled on each other when it comes to sex is honestly very very harmful emotionally and physically listen sex is anything but casual and we need to start treating it that way it is literally like a interchanging of souls if a man is able to make you come like girl you're gonna be practically in love with him for real for real no but your body's gonna at least feel that way for sure so yeah take it a little seriously

and also if you have an STI don't sweat it make sure you have it under control or you get the medication necessary talk to your doctor go to the doctor don't be afraid to get your help there and also when it comes to your next sexual partner making sure you're having that conversation of course i didn't think about any of these things until i got one and then i was like oh my god i need to be interrogating every man i sleep with because like oh my god i don't want another one it's a bitch to deal with and not something that i think anybody should have to deal with and men are all infected so you might as well go and ask them how to be good at having interesting conversations i have learned honestly that having interesting conversations simply comes from asking

people questions oh so what do you do oh that's amazing what do you what what's your passion um where did you go to school where'd you grow up what was your hometown like uh what's your favorite thing right now just asking people questions and then people always love to answer questions people always love to answer questions trust me from a bitch who answers questions all day people love to answer questions ask them questions that's how you have interesting conversations people have so many interesting stories to tell and you never know like what stories people have to tell unless you ask them it'll help them open up it'll help you guys connect maybe you have equal levels or playing fields to connect on to bond over things like

that but ask people questions people love to get asked questions people love to answer questions and I do think it helps people come out of their shell and stop with the surface level conversation and get more into the deep things this is interesting do you see yourself moving out of Kansas City honestly yeah I do I the older I get the more I do I do love Kansas City it has a really special place in my heart absolutely I never thought I would be able to love my city when I was growing up especially in high school I wanted nothing more but to get the fuck out of here and just go as far as i possibly could no matter where it took me took me to omaha nebraska girl you could have gone anywhere why the hell did you go there i mean shout out to my omaha girlies

y'all did me well when i was there but yeah like hello you can go anywhere and the city life is so convenient i do love the city life where it's like two minutes down the road i mean you can walk everywhere two minutes down the road you can get whatever you need it's so convenient but i don't mind a little bit of inconvenience and honestly I think I really just want some peace and quiet I think I just want some peace and quiet like I'm ready to go out into the country and just like hear nothing but birds to see the sunset and only greenery like I think that's really what I'm aiming for now um and I I think my parents will also probably move to Oregon within the next 10 years if I had to guess just because my mom's family is all out there I don't think I could

see myself living in Oregon but I could see myself living in California like Northern California I think I am a California girl at heart I could absolutely see myself living in Montana or like Wyoming out in the country out there I think it's so incredibly beautiful the nature that it has to offer is just breathtaking but also there's a little piece of me that truly does love the Midwest loves the Kansas side of myself the Kansas country girl the plains and I could also just see myself moving out to the country out here um that's something for Hannah down the road to figure out because bitch best believe I do not have the money to buy a house right now um but once i do yeah i don't think it's something that i'm afraid of doing i just i'm taking my time

figuring it out on where i want to go and where i want to move but if you ever have the itch to move and you know exactly where you want to go you know exactly what you want to do you have a city in mind you can physically envision yourself living there do it especially young because you have the drive you have the energy you have the willpower to get out there and to figure it out and the older you get the more settled you get and where you are so if you're young and you have an inkling of like i want to live in this city i want to move to this place do it you can do it you can do anything young people listen to me right here you can do anything it truly is just a question of how bad do you want it oh no how to deal with your partner sending videos slash pics of other girls

to their friends behind you break up break up and that's not me saying that lightly that's me saying that man is a slut and a whore and if he has the option to fuck another girl i think he absolutely would and i don't think that's a position you should be in i don't think any i don't think any woman ever should be in a relationship where they think or know most importantly or have to worry about their partner doing anything behind their back whether it's talking to another girl looking at photos videos sending photos or videos or sleeping with them behind their back that is not anxiety that i think you should have to deal with in a relationship and i argue that if you're in a relationship where that that is an anxiety that you have i don't think it'll work i don't

think you should be in a relationship that causes you anxiety you know what i mean leave immediately tell him he's a piece of shit to his face tell him he does not deserve you and get the fuck out of there the beautiful thing about leaving a man especially that's not giving you what you want is it will make you feel like a queen it will make you feel like oh my god wow i'm so incredibly powerful I told this man to fuck off and I'm going out there and I'm getting everything that I want because he can't give it to me kudos mama opinions on being lazy and putting things off oh I am a notorious notorious I'm just like an avoidant do you know what I mean especially when I get overwhelmed or anxious or anything like that I become very avoidant and very lazy because

here's the simple answer it is easier to sit down and do nothing and just feel complete anxiety than it is to actually get up and do the thing probably doing the thing or doing the task or doing the job that it takes in front of you that is causing the anxiety is easier than you ever could have thought but it's easier to not do the task and to be lazy and to lay down and to be avoidant and to avoid those things but the funny thing is that's not living life that's not living life you're not living life you're not engaging with life you're not being an active participant in life you are letting life pass you by and a lot of the ways that i avoid that is just by honestly you really have to see that big picture for yourself and if you can't see that big picture

for yourself you have to build the idea of a big picture for yourself girl move board it out dream a little bit you know what i mean but every time i find myself in that position where i'm like laying down on the floor i don't want to move i don't want to do it i just i just don't me having to go to the doctor me having to go to therapy me having to go get my tags replaced like i don't want to do it i don't wanna i don't wanna okay cool you don't wanna that's fine is it based in a sense of i'm just burnt out and i do actually need a moment to rest before i can go do those things okay valid take a moment take a breather rest up recharge rebuild move forward or is it based on the fact that i'm just lazy and i'm avoiding things that are important to me because

it's the easier choice if it's that one you really have to envision that big picture idea of your life that big picture idea of how you want to live life of what kind of life you want to live is you sitting down laying down not doing anything gonna help that dream be up become reality no cool well then get the fuck up how bad do you want that reality to be it is so simple to bring your dreams into reality all it takes is getting the fuck up and doing the task in front of you one task at a time. It's not that overwhelming. You don't have to do the 30 million tasks in front of you. That's not what anybody is asking you to do. All you have to do is do the one in front of you, one task at a time. You can always take breaks in between. That's the beautiful thing.

That's what really has helped my laziness. You can always take a five-minute break. Breaks are always available to you. If you do a task and it's hard, like working out, sometimes even doing the dishes can feel like working out, especially if you're in that avoidance stage it can feel like a big picture task doing that big thing taking a little 5 10 15 minute break getting up doing the next thing it will help chunk it up it will help you from getting overwhelmed and also it will reinforce the treat mindset of like okay I can do these things and then I can reward myself I can do these hard things and then I can rest and relax and guess what the rest and the relaxation you're going to feel after actually completing your tasks

will feel 10 times better 10 times more rewarding and actually restful than if you just avoid the shit that you need to do and just be lazy because that's going to be an anxiety-filled rest that's going to be anxiety-filled laying on the floor versus okay i'm exhausted but also i'm actually able to receive some rest because it's not based on anxiety and avoidance you know what i mean it's the easier choice to lay down and be lazy and put things off but is it the right choice something to think about okay i've been scrolling through the questions and literally question after question after question is like i need a new job i need a new job i need a new job i need a new job and here's the thing i'm sure all of the jobs are paying well or it's like there's nothing

actually horrible awful about the jobs it's just like i think you're probably burnt out from the same nine to five routine you've been doing for the past how many years how many months you know what I mean and I would like to give you guys the understanding and opportunity to maybe do a seasonal job I think seasonal jobs are so slept on especially when you need that just extra dose of you know just getting out of your usual routine trying something new maybe going to a new place seasonal jobs are fantastic I have so many friends who do seasonal jobs working on farms I have so many friends who do seasonal jobs working at bars working on ranches working with horses teaching kids like summer camps things like that there's so many opportunities specifically I

recommend like if you're trying to find them looking on cool coolworks.com if I could leave everything behind right here right now like I mean I have a cat I can't bring my cat with me but if I could leave everything and just go work somewhere else bitch my ass would have been in Jackson Hole a month ago working the seasonal job like hello if you need to switch it up there might even be seasonal jobs like in the area that you're in like I said working with local produce working with farms working a farm stand seasonal jobs are always available and it's not a long-term commitment it's only like maybe three to six month commitment so if you have the desire and the need to like just leave your life behind and run away and experience something new I think seasonal

jobs are such a good way to do that and seasonal jobs are available here in the u.s they're available in other countries i highly recommend if you're young specifically finding a seasonal job that offers housing where you are so then you don't have to figure out so many different other things work for a national park we need more people protecting your national parks now more so than ever um but yeah there's so many options out there that you can switch up try something new site try something really cool out go to a country you've never been to go to a state you've never been to try a job you've never tried that's outside of just like okay well let me switch from this serving job to this serving job it's like cool well maybe try a serving job in a whole

different state in a whole different country maybe you work with children cool go work a summer camp in a whole different state or in nature for the summer I had a co-worker who did that who was like worked all winter where we were and then was an art teacher at a summer camp all summer and it was like that was her passion that's what she lived for the winters were just for having a good time drinking making a little bit of money so then she can go out there during the summer there is always an opportunity if you seek it out that's what's so beautiful about life there truly is always an opportunity if you seek it out you just have to know what you're looking for sometimes you don't even know what you're looking for until you apply and you get accepted fuck it apply to

that job try this one out try that one out who cares if you hear a million no's eventually you're going to hear a yes that's for fucking sure this one friend gives me weird vibes but uh everybody else likes them oh this is a hard one this is hard because i think it's so important to trust your intuition i think it's very important to trust your intuition especially when it comes to other people um like your gut instinct about other people if you meet someone and they have awful energy and a weird vibe i think you should listen to it and believe it because i hate to say but it's always right it really is at least for me personally because I think my I'm able to decipher other people a little bit easier because I like myself when you like yourself you will have an

easier time making these distinctions because you'll be grounded in how you view people which is net positive if you view yourself positive you will also kind of view other people in a net positive um so when you do feel that gut instinct of negative you'll be like okay wait usually I'm a positive person I like myself I do enjoy interacting with other people but this interaction is weird and awkward and odd every time I felt that I've been like I don't know I'm gonna remember that in the back of my head and I'm gonna kind of like distance myself in a sense but I'm not gonna be like a mean bitch like I'm just gonna wait until it's proven to me and every single time that weird bitch instinct it's always proven to me it always is I'm like ah I clocked that

months ago I knew this was going to happen always it's good to give people the benefit of the doubt but if you're like I don't know I don't know this conversation's odd this behavior's weird I feel like you're kind of putting me down but also you're smiling at me and I'm confused listen to that gut instinct I also think when you view yourself negatively you have a hard time disticting between like those interactions with people because negative people always view people negatively you know in that sort of way i also think that's what makes the the weird bitches the weird bitches it's like they hate themselves they hate everybody else around them and that comes off very subconsciously which is when the you might get that gut instinct of like wait a

minute this person's acting a little odd so if you can base yourself in positivity you will have an easier time deciphering that intuition but if you do get that gut instinct of like weird bitch alert weird bitch alert yeah you're probably right i hate to say it you are probably right how do i heal my inner teen honestly i'm healing my inner teen right now in two parts and i realize i really haven't addressed her because she's such an emo little bitch but like love her for that because she is a down ass hard ass bitch i just never really connect with her because she's a little intimidating um so number one uh healing my inner teen therapy we got to work on the dark side of stuff. Like I said in the beginning, we got to work on those emotions that maybe are a little

bit more scary, those memories that are a little bit more scary. They're holding me back in a way that I just can't understand right now. But I know that once I address it and once I work through those things and once I see how it affects my daily life or maybe the relationships I build or the experiences that I go after, maybe my substance issues, I think it will just help me become a more well-rounded understanding individual of myself which is very important it'll get a lot of self-strength it'll get a lot of self-understanding and just power behind that I think that's very important like I said I don't think that's something I can do alone even as a teen that was not something I could do alone I was impatient I needed a lot of lot of extra help

and I don't think you should be afraid to ask for help if you need help asking for help was the bravest thing i ever did and i don't think i would be here without it and i'm so proud of my younger self for being so just strong for that and knowing what i needed even in the moment um and i know now maybe that's something i need not so scary as what it was back then um i just need like a little bit of a boost or maybe a third party perspective that's non-judgmental but help nonetheless i think it's important and if you have the privilege to get help do so go get it you deserve it we all need a little help sometimes you can't go through this life alone when I was younger you used to want to like lay down and die before I even asked somebody to help me up and it's like you will die

you gotta ask eventually like people will keep driving over you through the mud you have to ask for help if you need it if you can't get up if your legs aren't working girl somebody out there wants to grab your hand and help pull you up and I think that's beautiful and I think there's always an opportunity for that and if you need it do it it will be the bravest thing and best thing you ever do for yourself now outside of that something that i've been doing that's a little bit more fun that also is helping me heal my inner teen is just doing my favorite teen activities you know what i mean um the same way that you would heal your inner child where it's like i'm gonna do arts and crafts or i'm gonna do you know whatever it was that i loved to do when i was a child like

collecting my favorite dolls collecting my favorite books going back to the literature but going back to whatever you enjoyed when you were younger I think healing your inner teen is also doing a part of that which is just engaging in your favorite activities that maybe you forgot about along along the way except for when I was a teen I was just a bit more of a delinquent so it's like kind of making peace with the delinquent activities and finding a classy adult way to do it so what I've been doing personally to heal my inner teen is every night I sit out on the front porch with my cat my childhood cat who I love endlessly and I know my inner teen is looking at me and just like sobbing over the fact that we're together and

life is good and I get a love on him so much and I sit outside on my porch and I watch the sunset that go down and i read smut fan fiction and i either have like a glass of wine or i like roll a joint for myself to smoke out on the front patio it is truly the little things it's like no no if teen hannah could see me now she'd be like we made it we made it we wow we survived all of that for this and it was so incredibly worth it but i forgot how like how much i just wanted to do that when i was younger like the fact i was reading so much smut fan fiction like what teen girl isn't you know what i mean but i was like you know what let's get back into it because i do miss those days and i've been reading that i've been reading kitchen confidential which is kind of smut fan

fiction in its own separate silly way having a little joint at the end of the day to take the edge off and like taking a moment to roll myself something to show my self-appreciation and also just showing the things around me that I had when I was younger just some love some appreciation it is just healing and a little bit life-changing helps the perspective everything become a little bit more well-rounded and appreciative of everything that I've gone through also what's beautiful about when you're a teen is you have you dare to dream a little bit bigger I mean you know the reality of what's in front of you but you do kind of start to realize like wow I could do that you know like I could go to this college or I could move to this place or I'm pinning a bunch

of boards about this one little thing that I want I want to live out in New York City and go become this big star I want to go you dream just a little bit harder than you do at any point in time in the rest of your life and I think that's really important to tap into especially where I am now in my mid-20s where I feel like I was faking the adult thing which you know I did fake it till I made it now I'm feeling a little bit more level and now I'm understanding the importance of that dreaming and that desire for what you want and the unstoppable ability that you have when you're a teen where it's like fuck you fuck everything fuck what everybody else says about me I don't care if you think I can't do it I'm gonna go fucking do that thing I think that energy

is so powerful I think it's so potent it can be a little bit enthralling and a little bit not based in reality sometimes but I do think it's important to understand those desires and those wants and those needs and to actually go out and get them you want them for a reason you're desiring for them for a reason I mean sometimes like I said not based in reality you can just be like okay cute girl let's think about it for a second and move on but those things that stick with you that you know you want that have been there since you were a teen I think those things are very important to follow through on there's something about looking back on my past selves and sure I was young I was embarrassing I was making mistakes but like I do it all for them I really

do and that's what's beautiful about life and continuing on in general is you have endless opportunities to grow to change to develop into a new person and to look back on those past selves what they were trying to achieve and even if you weren't able to do it then you always have the opportunity to do it now you always do every day is a new opportunity every day we wake up you're giving a new opportunity to just look at the world around us and to decide what we want and to ultimately just go after it it is the hardest thing you do it is probably the bravest thing you'll ever do but i do think it is important to actively live our lives and to not passively live our lives and your passions no matter what no matter how big or small or important like the

question before said like what if I'm just happy doing something simple that is important even if it's simple it is so incredibly important because you know what you want that's what makes it important you know what you desire you know what you're looking for and it can be simple sometimes it is simple actually the most important things are sometimes the simplest but simply having that recognition having that understanding and then having the desire for yourself to do better and to go after those things is how we ultimately eventually live those dream lives how we then one day are laying on our deathbed and know that we have lived our lives to the fullest because we heard that internal desire and we went after it so i think with this next half of my 20s i'm

just gonna a be outside live my life say yes to everything hang out with those people go to that house show go on that party bus with 50 people that I have no clue who they are but also just like understand that desire and go after everything I want not live my life for anybody else but mine to live fully in my intuition and to be brave enough to achieve those goals and those dreams that are things that are calling me that are impossible to ignore they're impossible to ignore for a reason be brave enough to answer the call to go after them to live unapologetically for myself and to get a little selfish in that sort of sense even if it is a hard decision to be like you know what but it's what i do need right now and it is what i am desiring and i know

that it's the right choice for me even if it is the hard choice that's the shitty thing about adulting it's like goddamn that's the hard choice but i do know i know deep down in my heart it's the right one I don't know I'm feeling hopeful going forward I do think I'm at a place in life that I never thought I got to could get to stability wise and I think that's very important it's important to look back and see the growth that you have done in your life and you have achieved in your life to not diminish it or say it's small or compare it to other people what have you done for yourself how have you grown and how can you celebrate that I think that's so important because the way that i've grown is completely different the way my friends have

grown or you know things that they've achieved but still that doesn't negate what i have done and the importance of it it's good to look back reflect celebrate and also dream a little bit going forward understand that this is our life and we can do anything we want with it all we got to do is find that dream find that intuition and chase it chase after everything we want it's always an option choosing yourself is always an option anyways with that being said love you all so incredibly much hopefully i could dose you with a little bit of positivity for this beautiful summer week that we are having may is here in full swing we are going to live this summer so fully we are going to say yes to everything we are going to create so many memories we're just

going to get outside and live that's the whole point of summer you know the trees are alive the flowers are alive the plants are alive the bugs are alive it's time for you to live too bitch but i love you all so much if you want to hear for more from me or if you want your question answered come join the patreon patreon.com smoke shawty i answer every single question on the patreon episode yes every single question i think last week we had 40 questions yep i sit down i answer everyone to the best of my ability i also upload more for more fun things like we do sunday spiritual stuff i just did a full moon write up which please survive this full moon on monday the best that you can weekly inspiration spells things like that very fun over there patreon.com

slash smoke shotty and if you want your question answered for the podcast i do it on my instagram i had somebody ask like hey what if we have a question but we don't have instagram um if you are listening on spotify spotify does have comments if you feel like it you can leave your comment under the spotify if you're on youtube you can leave your comment under the youtube i can answer i can i'll see those questions and i'll answer them you know what i mean um if you want to dm me on instagram that works too and also you can just email me that works you there's always a way to get your question to me and i will try and answer it if i see it absolutely but i do answer a majority of the questions on my instagram i upload the questionnaire every sunday

it's up for 24 hours so we are intuitively connected for the week but my instagram is at hannah marlene if you want to see what i'm up to or submit your question but with that being said you guys i love you so much thank you for being here thank you for just being on this crazy chaotic journey that is life stay sexy stay sane and i'll see you all so soon Two in five Canadians will hear the words, you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto

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