Smoke Sesh - running away, off the grid & reconnecting to yourself

Episode Date: June 18, 2024

Hello hotties and welcome back to a regularly scheduled episode of the pod! Im finally home from my long vacation away to the Montana Mountains and I have a lotttt to talk about! I update you on how my travels were, where I went, connecting to nature and connecting to myself, getting too drunk at the cowboy bar and breaking my nose, horseback riding, hiking, swimming in glacial springs and lakes, plus much much much much more! (If you want to skip my trip recap our question speed round begins at 44:04) We chat moving on, letting go, how to reconnect with yourself, making mistakes, how to be blessed by the universe and god, being a good person and attracting bad people, getting your crushes attention, favorite crystals, how to find your power and what truly is power? post grad blues, mean girls, and much much much much more! If you want to see pictures from my trip and keep up with what im up to follow the instagram @hannahmarlene and if you want an extra episode each week plus extra content join the patreon patron.com/smokeseshshawty where I go over all your questions! Love you! Chat soon, MUAH!

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash, so come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life, the good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing, I've got a story for it all. good morning hotties welcome back to another beautiful amazing wonderful incredible episode of smoke sesh my name is hannah your host and i just got home from montana last night you guys i am up i am at it i am ready to sit down have a little kiki tell you guys all about my trip

where i basically just went off the grid in the montana mountains for like 10 days yes 10 days i pre-recorded as you guys know the confessionals episode which by the way hope you loved i had a blast doing that you guys are insane and i love that about you okay no judgment here i'm probably crazier um but i didn't want to leave you guys hanging for too long because I did take a couple or a week off like prior so I did that but now I am back with so many story times and just so much to fill you guys in on my trip was so refreshing and relaxing and incredible um we me and my childhood best friends I'm talking like 10 plus years of friendship actually probably 25 plus years and you're like Hannah you're 25 how is that possible literally one of my friends

our moms had their baby shower together because we have been neighbors our whole entire life like that's how long I have been friends with these girls they bring so much peace and love and fulfillment to my life and I am so lucky to be able to have them as lifelong friends and be able to go on trips with them and just get to enjoy life side by side with them it is so fulfilling to just have people that maybe you don't have a lot of people maybe you have a select couple that you know you can always rely on it is nice to at least have a couple that you know whenever you get back together whether it's been months or years without seeing each other it's like you guys never missed a beat you know like you just immediately get right back into the swing of

things it feels like you when you were eight years old hanging out on the playground or when you were 14 years old sneaking out and like having sleepovers or when you were 18 and going out and being crazy with each other it's just so nice to get back into that routine and I'm so lucky to have them as friends and be able to now as adults go out and experience life side by side with them so I'm so blessed to have them in my life and I'm so blessed that they wanted to go on this trip with me um we ended up going from as you guys know we live in KC so we went from Kansas City up to Denver Denver to Jackson Hole Wyoming and then Jackson Hole Wyoming to Montana we did Yellowstone but we stayed in like Gardner Bozeman area so a little bit north of Yellowstone but we

were gone and off the grid kind of off the grid mostly off the grid for like 10 plus days and I thought going into this I was like 10 days that's a lot my longest vacation has been seven days that was with my boyfriend in Mexico and I felt like by the end of it I was like I'm ready to get home I'm tired we've done everything like I'm ready to go so I was a little nervous going into it because I was like what if I just get burnt out like what if I'm like get homesick whatever it may be listen by the end of these 10 days I was like you know what I could have gone another couple days like I could have had another couple days and I think that's because a lot of our trip was simply just like getting away from the chaos of life and escaping into nature and going on

these hikes and swimming in glacier pools and just like it was so refreshing and it was just the kind of vacation I needed I feel like usually vacations for me are go go go which this one was but it's usually go go go in the sense of like city you know ocean beach back to city back to drinking back to this place like it's kind of exhausting in that sort of way but this way where we were just escaping into nature it was so refreshing and so incredible so let's get into what we did I highly recommend doing this kind of route or simply just going to this place um I thought Wyoming and Yellowstone was such a beautiful area and although it was busy I feel like it was busy for the people who lived in that area but like people who maybe live where I am maybe on the

west coast or the east coast like there are so many beautiful places in like rural kind of in the middle of nowhere midwest that I think are so fucking worth it especially the Tetons which is where we ended up uh near Jackson Hole but to kick things off we left last Friday at like 7 a.m and we drove directly to Denver um Denver was a little weird it was a little weird Denver itself is a little weird and I love Denver I go to Denver quite often um but it was summer break and you could tell and the people were a little a little weird a little off-putting um and I'm not saying I hate my Denver girlies like there were a couple girlies that we met that were so sweet and so kind they're like can we take your picture can we you know like they just saw us being girls and wanted

to like jump in on it and I love that energy it was mostly like the middle-aged people that we were beefing with um but we got to Denver we went out to like a little dim sum place we had a good little dinner we went to bed early and then we had to get to our Airbnb and we had no idea where our Airbnb was all we saw in the reviews was it's a little bit of an industrial area but you know you get used to it listen it was cheap as hell it was really cute I'm not gonna lie like the inside was beautiful had ducks they had fresh duck eggs for us to eat but when I tell you we walked out of our Airbnb and there was a man getting his dick sucked through a car window like we were like the block was hot you know what i mean like listen i live in kansas city and i live in a

very busy area of the city but like there were girls street walking right outside our apartment like our airbnb like the corner was the driveway you know what i mean and hey listen we all gotta get our money but when we when we are as cute little girlies and our little sundresses walked out of the airbnb and we looked across the street my friend goes what's going on and literally it's this man on his tippy toes putting his dick through a car window and his pants are like on the ground I was like oh I was like okay ladies no one go out here alone like we all need to be holding someone's hand listen anyways that was like funny I didn't really feel unsafe at all it was just kind of like a jump scare I was like whoa I was not expecting that whatsoever um we

didn't really do a whole lot in Denver we were really just kind of preparing for our road trip so like doing last minute shopping uh seeing a little bit of the sights we did like that drive up to buffalo bill if you guys ever go to denver like a quick easy sightseeing is just driving up to that like buffalo bill observatory on the top of the mountain near golden and then driving down the mountain to golden and then doing some shopping in golden i love golden golden has always been great um one of the first vacations me and my boyfriend ever took together was to golden and there's this cute my favorite crystal store ever is in golden i am forgetting what it's called but it's the only crystal store there i just got a new ring actually from there i get

most of my rings from there they're pretty cheap um and very they last a lifetime um i've had one of these rings on my finger for about three four years now like are you kidding me so i was like let's do some shopping let's get some crystals you know and last time i went there with my boyfriend like this front desk lady was like they cleanse the energy of your rings so then there's no like residual energy and it's fresh for you but then she like grabbed my hand and was like she gave me like a psychic reading randomly that I was not prepared for she was just like listen you have a lot of ideas and I know you want to do this one thing and you have to follow your passions and if you follow your passions and everything else will follow behind it please

just trust in yourself and lean into what you want to do and I was like whoa okay and literally her telling me that is what jump-started this podcast and what jump-started like me sitting down and being open and talking with you guys so shout out to her um but we did some shopping and then we ended up at this bar ish bar more like a brewery but it's a self-serve brewery which i think is really cool um they have all the taps along the walls they have sake they have wine they have craft cocktails they have beer anything you could ever dream of and you get a little card and a wristband and then you literally serve yourself like you put the card in the top of the slot and then it pours you whatever whatever how much you want and it charges you by ounce you can try a

bunch or you can get a couple glasses so we sat next to the river and we had some drinks and then went back home because we had an early day the next day um next day we woke up and we drove straight to wyoming straight to jackson hole um in jackson hole the drive to jackson hole is not that great drive from Kansas City to Jackson Hole is a lot of just planes like listen we live in the Great Plains let's be real it's just flat flat earth I mean you can see the literal curve of the earth as you're driving through there um it was definitely a lot to get through but hey listen do some sightseeing do some little editing on my phone you know take a little nap what's better than that on a road trip you know what I mean have a little snack but we did two days in Denver and

then we drove straight to Jackson Hole Wyoming in Jackson Hole Wyoming if you guys are interested we stayed at the Antler Inn um and it was kind of like a cheaper motel in the area but I really wanted to stay in the town square in walking distance so then we weren't really doing off grid quite yet we did that more so in Montana and Yellowstone since everything is off grid out there but we stayed at the Antler Inn I highly recommend it it was like the perfect size bedroom for four girls to stay in had a huge ass mirror and two sinks which is listen as a girl like you need space to get ready especially if there's multiple girls so the fact that it like accounted for all that was really great um and they had like a fireplace in the room fresh seats you know room

service it didn't seem like gross at all fantastic little motel um and close to everything like every morning i walked to get us all coffee and then i walked back because the girls were busy getting ready um but that first day was really spent just like getting or that first day of driving to jackson hall was really spent like eight hours getting there and then getting unpacked and doing a little bit of grocery shopping to make sure we were prepared for the next day um we stayed in jackson hall specifically because it is like the only town near the tetons and i really wanted to go to the tetons the tetons which i think means like it's like tris oh god i'm gonna butcher this trace twice titans is like french for the three boobs basically because when the french are

traveling through there they saw these mountains and they were like oh it feels like home like oh titties hi feels like home oh i'm thinking of my wife back in france or whatever when they were traveling through you know america back in the day i don't know i don't know this isn't a history lesson some cowboy on our cowboy tour told us this little fun fact for you all they do kind of look like boobs. Anyways, I was very excited for that because there was a bunch of hikes that are pretty off grid, not super popular. And there's a ton of like little lakes and streams and waterfalls going through these mountains. So the next morning we woke up and we did like a six and a half mile hike. Yes. Yes, babe. Six and a half mile hike. I haven't done like any

workout to prepare for this, but my ass was up that mountain. Okay. Up it. And we hiked around, i think it's called jenny lake we hiked around jenny lake and then up to this place called hidden falls which is basically like this 300 foot waterfall insane insane incredible and then two of my friends were like we're done we can't hike anymore and thank god i had this other friend that was like ready to go she's like no no we're here hannah like let's just get it done so we hiked then up the mountain to this place called inspiration point where you could see over the entire lake and see the whole entire mountain range and it was just oh my god it was stunning i need to get outside and get off the grid listen you're depressed please go to an off-grid like

hiking location not alone or at least have some sort of like bear spray or mace for the men i'm not worried about the bears but like get off grid tap into yourself tap into nature i forgot how fulfilling and just like beautiful it is to like see yourself in connection to nature and just like stumble upon all of these beautiful incredible areas i posted photos like as i was going through there but i will be posting way more photos on my instagram um coming soon instagram.com slash hannah marlene if you want to check it out i already posted my like cowgirl photos um but it is just like oh my god insane i mean coming from kansas city where everything's flat i mean i you know me i'm a creek girl i get out i do hiking but it's more like foresty this was

just like hiking through the mountains off grid like insane we were hiking through there and there were a couple trees down and on the way back there were like three rangers walking through and they're like hey like are any trees down on the on the trails and i was like oh yeah a couple blah blah i wasn't really paying attention then i looked up and one of these men were holding a giant a fucking chainsaw like imagine being the man like your job is to go chainsaw the trees four miles in on the hike I was like oh good luck sir that's gonna be tough work because these trees were massive massive so we hiked around Jenny Lake up to Hidden Falls and then up to Inspiration Point and then hiked back home we were pretty exhausted after that obviously I think we like

got a couple beers and then went home took a nap the next morning we wanted to do a hike in specifically we wanted to do swimming listen listen i need to be in water i'm a water girl i have a pisces rising like it feels refreshing it feels incredible but when i tell you these mountains still had snow on them we were hiking up to the mountains and then there'd be like piles of snow everywhere because it it's not completely summer there yet like at nights it got to maybe like 30 degrees it was freezing okay but i wanted to get in some water okay i wanted to get out i wanted to do a little swimming i wanted to do some refreshing um and there were school buses of children just getting dropped off and like i don't know what these summer camps are but like if i was

a middle school child getting dropped off in the woods i would be getting into some trouble i would i would be getting into some trouble for sure so we hiked around specifically this lake called string lake which hiked up into the mountains back down and then we circled to like a cute little area that you could just like walk into the water we could throw some blankets down change into our bikinis this water was so clear i mean it's fresh snowfall it's literally fresh snow run off into these lakes completely crystal clear so gorgeous so fucking cold so fucking cold honestly thank god we did like a six and a half mile hike the day before and then like a four and a half mile hike the morning right before we swam my legs shot my ankles hurt i had blisters i was tired i

was ready to get in that water oh my god i jumped right in my friend bought us like all glitter tubes and i wore of course my sydney mary bikini shout out to her in the glacier pools in the glacier water i took some fun photos you guys will be seeing those soon trust um and we just spent the day hanging out in our glitter tubes in the crystal clear glacier lake swimming about eating our sandwiches honestly sandwiches very underrated we ate sandwiches every day for lunch and every single time they slapped so good sandwiches with some jalapeno kettle chips oh don't say no more you know what i mean um spent the day really just floating enjoying laying in the sun having the best fucking time ever that honestly was probably my favorite memory

of the entire trip just us laying in our glitter tubes under the sun kicking my feet in the crystal clear blue water looking up and just seeing the tetons right in front of us oh my god it was incredible we were like the only ones in the water there were people like kayaking and uh paddle boarding but they were not getting that fucking water but i was like listen we have one life ladies get in that water get to floating get to enjoying that's all that matters so after that I think we just like had some bison burgers and went home one of my big things I wanted to do was eat bison bison honestly slaps they're so cute I'm sorry but it's really good and I was in the area so I was like let's get bison burgers let's eat as much bison as we possibly can because I'm not

gonna get that back home you know what I mean so I think we just hung out did our things and the next day was our cowgirl day i gotta live my cowgirl fantasy you guys um we woke up we went to a place called cowboy coffee in jackson hole really really good honestly if you go to jackson hole i do not recommend eating food anywhere the food very mid very mid but the coffee slaps incredible we went to a place called persephone's that was incredible for coffee and then a place called cowboy coffee that was incredible the only good food I had in Jackson Hole was at dog or dog and that was like a to-go breakfast burrito place so of course it was gonna be like amazing you know what I mean so we woke up early in the morning we went we had our little cowboy

coffee we changed into our cowgirl attire and then we went horseback riding for an hour through the Tetons I'm talking we were on the top of the world on horseback riding through these fields full of beautiful wildflowers looking to our left seeing the Tetons looking to our right seeing more mountains and lakes and rivers oh it was incredible I think the the ranch we went to was called Spring Creek Ranch so if you need a place to go that is definitely it it was pretty cheap the horses were well taken care of they actually were like kind of bigger not to body shame the horses but the cowboys were literally like no like we have to get these horses moving they're so lazy and they just eat all the time like they don't let them eat any grass on the

trails like they get fed i promise you they're actually quite big like they're just really fucking lazy which honestly if i was a horse like i get it and it's so funny because i didn't realize i'm not i haven't really grown up around horses i didn't realize they had so much of like a personality but they like all had their own little personalities they all like talked back to each other like neighing at each other saying like move the fuck back at the front of front of our group there was like this older couple probably like at least 65 one of them had hearing aids that i know were not fucking turned on like that man was checked out for sure but his wife was in front of him and when i tell you we we started going up the trail just a little bit probably like 400 feet

and her horse both legs off the ground bucked her into the air she came up off this horse at least three feet and then like slammed back down on top of that horse i was like oh my god if that happened to me i would immediately be like i need a new fucking horse like i'm sorry get me off this horse i would have been freaked out but the cowboy just like turned around was like are you okay okay cool let's keep moving like no care in the world i was like i would be shocked if that happened to me and that poor lady her husband didn't even notice his hearing aids weren't on he didn't even see but like these horses so funny my horse's name was karen it was like a beautiful blonde horse tall as hell tell me why they had like a little mounting block for everybody else

to get on their horse but they pulled this blonde ass horse around which honestly thank you for matching my horse to my outfit they get it she was like bright blonde her name was karen because apparently she's always up people's asses because she's like let's go i want to get off this fucking trail like please keep moving um and tell me why they brought this big ass horse around was and just like brought it in front of me like not even to the mounting block like everybody else they just brought it in front of me and were like can you get on listen bitch i i'll try my darndest that's for sure so i hopped on that fucking horse and we rode it through the mountains through the tetons all around he was giving us like wildflower flower facts and animal facts and

all the sorts you know all the facts so shout out to him love a good tour guide like i don't know the facts so thank god someone does and is willing to tell us um but we did that and then after that that's when we went to the dog we had some breakfast burritos we walked around town we did some shopping super fun um and then we got dressed up into like some nice little flowy dresses and we went to this place called mormon row which is these about abandoned barns right in front of the tetons kind of off grid that's like beautiful during sunset we went we took some sunset pictures you know the girlies we got to get in there we got to take some photos um and then we changed and we went to the million dollar cowboy bar which honestly oh sorry of the hiccups it's pretty fun

it was pretty fun it was a cute little bar fantastic i got way too drunk i did i got way too drunk i'm not gonna lie oh i forgot before the cowboy bar well we went to the cowboy bar had a drink and then we went to the rodeo the rodeo it was a full cowgirl day horseback rodeo cowboy bar like we were on brand that's for fucking sure we went to the rodeo and we got there a little late so the stands were completely full completely full so we sat down on these like little picnic tables right next to like the sheep and where they kept the cows and the concession stands which honestly was the best spot in the house because we were on eye level we could see everything the cowboys were like hopping the fence like trying to get away from the bulls right in

front of us they were wrangling the sheep in front of us um and i was a little nervous about the animal cruelty at the rodeo i was like am i gonna be sad but it was really just like barrel racing and you know they were just like it was like not a real real rodeo they were just doing their thing like running around on horses and i appreciated that but if you want to see pictures from the rodeo and the cowboy bar i literally just posted them an hour ago so go check them out i wore a cute little denim store skirt i looked like jesse from toy story i had like a cute little like brandy melville white tank top my boots my cowgirl boots and then i braided my hair with like two little ribbons it was so cunty serving country literally um and next to us there was like this

family like this mom the dad which hot couple okay they were cute like they were cutesy and then like their son they're like teenage son and she was crazy she was crazy my friends are nurses they're ic or one of them is an icu nurse but they all work in the hospital girl if you work in a hospital you have to be insane because the things that you're dealing with let's be fucking real I dodged a bullet not becoming a nurse because I don't think I could put up with it like I fight I fight and they don't so that's why they can be nurses but she was ICU nurse and she was crazy she was crazy they were like going on a cross-country tour from Florida they were driving up from Florida they went like through Kansas City all around you know the Midwest just enjoying

their time she was in this like she was in cut off rhinestone miss me shorts cowboy boots a furry cheetah print vest and a cowgirl hat I looked at her and I said this is gonna be me in like 30 years and honestly I can't wait I really can't wait her husband was just there next to her like making sure she had a good time her son was a little embarrassed but then he saw us like vibing with her and then we were like no your mom's cool you're gonna you're gonna be so thankful to have a mom like her in 10 years like your the girls that you bring home they're gonna love her don't worry so he was like okay vibe whatever and we were just vibing with this lady I love making friends with like middle-aged women on vacation because it gives me hope I'm like oh okay this is

gonna be me when I'm older like I love meeting cool older women that is the ultimate best um we had huckleberry bison hot dogs at the rodeo honestly best hot dog I've ever had in my life dare i say i don't know what a huckleberry is but it's very popular out there everything is huckleberry flavored um which i was down for because it honestly just tastes kind of like a raspberry a citrusy raspberry mix so like let's go how am i gonna hate that but i think that's all i ate that night keep that in mind for what i'm gonna talk about next um going to the rodeo we did our thing and then uh time's up okay uh there was one specific girl there that she was wearing a really cool hat and we were buying drinks from her she was like the bartender or

whatever and we were chatting it up i was like oh where'd you get your hat she was so sweet whatever we leave we go to the cowboy bar like to end our night there she's there she's there and she's leading the line dancing i was like this is real country okay you go you work the rodeo bar stand and then when you get off your shift you go straight to the cowboy bar and you go line dancing living the life living the life you know what i mean so we went to the cowboy bar and listen it was the only night that i was gonna drink with my girls so best believe i was gonna drink drink okay i've been really good about my consumerism as of late okay i'll have my couple little drinks and i'll move on for the night you know but all i had that day was that hot dog and a very small

sandwich and we went to the bar before i had two drinks we went to the rodeo i had two drinks and then we went back to the bar which honestly at that point i was pretty fucking drunk but i was like i want to take shots with my girls so i think i had like oh god three vodka red bulls there and at least three or four green tea shots scary but me and my friend we were out there my friends from Houston so we were out there like line dancing she was teaching me how to line dance I was kicking with the the bartender girly from the rodeo she was teaching me how to line dance I could barely keep up because as you guys know like I'm a white girl there is no rhythm but I will try my best that's for sure we were out there dancing having a good time swinging around doing

our thing taking shots whatever um and it was a blast it was a really fun time I yeah like what's better than going out with your friends and going swing dancing going line dancing you know what I mean um and then we ended up back at home I showered and the next morning I woke up and I have there's something about turning 25 where your body stops like processing alcohol correctly I have never experienced a hangover like this in fact I think this is the first time I've ever experienced like a hangover I'm talking hung hungover okay like could barely breathe honestly and somehow that night I took a shower because I was all dusty from being on horseback and the rodeo and I didn't want to smell like animals so I showered after the rodeo but the tub was so slick

and so wet that apparently my friends that have told me this I fell I fell out of the shower and I think I broke my nose again this will be the fourth time I've broken my nose but I fell and I like fell on my butt and I think I whacked my face in the toilet but I woke up the next morning and I was like oh my god my fucking nose hurts so bad what happened what happened and I had to go through the pictures and like look at the pictures that I took of myself and like try and piece together when it happened I think it happened after I showered I just like slipped and fell but yeah I definitely broke my nose again you can't really tell because I covered it up with makeup it's not like worse in fact i think i broke it straighter so a win's a win honestly

but my god my nose has been through it first time i broke my nose it was playing crack the egg okay on a trampoline don't recommend don't recommend they jumped directly on my face i think it was like eight broke my nose second time cross country someone elbowed me in the face cracked my nose i'm talking full black eyes could not see eyes swollen my parents were like you still gotta go to school i'm like girl how am i gonna read oh that's what you get for having teachers for parents they're like you don't miss school unless you're throwing up or bleeding third time my car accident when i hit a police car going 75 miles an hour not my fault why were you parked in the middle of the highway well it's because a cattle truck had overturned on the highway above and there were

cows black angus cows falling from the highway onto the highway below it's also like 2 a.m so i don't think he was expecting anybody to go on the highway but also like hello and he parked in the middle of it no lights I hit the back of his car going 75 miles an hour my face hit that steering wheel so hard broke my nose this will be the fourth time slipping and falling on the girls trip after the cowboy bar whacking my face on the toilet so best believe I have been icing her and making sure she is taken care of but that next morning oh we had a drive from Jackson Hole to Yellowstone which is about a I mean going through Yellowstone is pretty slow I would say maybe like four hour drive definitely worth it um we covered almost all of yellowstone which is really nice but

that car ride i was like heavy breathing heavy breathing you know the best hangover cure though i think i found it officially a in the morning i really couldn't keep anything down so i really was not focused on that but i was laid back in that back seat window cracked fresh pine air blowing in my face staring at the mountains as they went by we had not seen animals that whole time listen when you go out in the mountains especially out there they're like bear spray bear spray you need bear spray like there are bears everywhere there are animals everywhere please be careful please stay away from them like i was like okay all right i'm prepared hello we didn't see one bear the first like five fucking days we were there we didn't see anything any

animals other than horses obviously the first five days we were there nothing and chipmunks so i was like oh these people have been lying they've been poaching and lying and as i'm hung over driving through the mountains fresh pine air on my face like half asleep head laid back my friends go buffalo i like shot up we looked across the field hundreds hundreds of buffalo everywhere just hanging out doing their thing and there were babies it's baby season you guys there are babies everywhere okay baby buffalo oh it was so precious and in that exact moment snap immediately hangover gone i was like all right we gotta get to work on taking care of ourselves i took i chugged a body armor i started chugging some water i ate a sandwich good to go but when

i tell you that fresh mountain breeze staring out the window seeing some live animals immediately immediately fixed me immediately hangover gone gone then we drove through yellowstone and we stayed in this like really remote beautiful log cabin up in this town called gardener uh just north of yellowstone a little bit so we got there we did some sightseeing along the way but we got there we unpacked and we had a lot of weed to smoke montana weed's legal so shout out but we we picked up like a $40 ounce from Colorado and we couldn't smoke at the, at the Antler Inn because we're in Wyoming. They're going to put me in jail forever. So like, let me just wait until I get to Montana. But we had pre-rolled about like 30 pre-rolls from this ounce. So we got there. I

cooked everybody like a rigatoni cheesy red sauce dish. And I cooked us all some cheesy bread and a nice salad and we smoked i think like five fucking joints also i've never seen bridgerton before and my my friends like the new season of bridgerton had just come out i don't know if you guys are into bridgerton i have not seen anything other than the second half of the third season um apparently they be fucking and sucking in this show like constantly anyways then we got home and we had to watch with them obviously the last season of bridgerton the last part of so we faced like five joints and sat down we watched that and we stared outside at the stars and had ourselves a time and then we drove through yellowstone yellowstone is so busy

but so beautiful so beautiful believe it or not my cousin is a rate like a park ranger kind of i guess she works at the old faithful inn shout out to her i love her endlessly so we went out I saw her small world what a life also because all these people who work at these like um like either as rangers or just in Yellowstone as like maybe you work at the front desk of a hotel or you work as like a gift shop operator whatever it may be there's plenty of jobs out there if you don't not know what to do with your life and you're looking for something to do and you want to get off the grid go work in a state park oh my god I was like I'm ready to up and move and leave everything behind to go live out and just like be in the mountains all the time

you live in the state park they have like dorms or whatever for you but my cousin was sending me pictures and i think like on her days off her and her boyfriend just like go out and they go camping and they just go and live their life and i'm like oh my god what a life what a life i'm so jealous i have way too much furniture here and clothes honestly but like it's nice to know that this is always an option like if you guys don't know what to do with your lives go work in a national park i think you would have so much fucking fun honestly like if you're not going to college go work at a national park like are you kidding me you're gonna meet people you're gonna chit chat you're gonna go live in the dorms you're gonna be in the national park for like the whole summer

it's really like a summer job because they shut down all of yellowstone in the winter i couldn't imagine being out there in the winter i know it gets just like insane but we saw old faithful we saw a bunch of geysers it is an active volcano so there's like acid pits and pools that you can go walk around my favorite part of yellowstone though was the grand canyon of yellowstone i was like it's not gonna be that deep because i've been to the grand canyon the grand canyon is humongous massive scary scarily massive just hole in the ground insane this was crazy crazy like it makes you feel so small because you're literally looking at the formation of something that happened thousands and thousands of years ago Yellowstone itself is a whole formation from the seismic

activity and volcanic activity from I don't know how many fucking years ago but a lot a lot in fact it's still an active volcano and I think when the Yellowstone volcano blows up like that's supposed to be the end of the world so I was like let's get out there and experience ladies like the ground is bubbling like seismic activities happening underneath you the pits and pools that look beautiful and you know blue and amazing and like oh i want to jump in there it's like sulfur sulfur water acidic water like if you get in there your bones will not be found because it's going to disappear forever like it's going to eat away at your bones crazy crazy yellowstone has definitely taken some dumb people off this planet but the grand canyon of yellowstone was

one of the most beautiful places i think i've ever visited in my life it's like this huge giant gorge in the middle of yellowstone that yellowstone river flows through but the mountains are topped with all of these beautiful green pine trees and then the rocks are these beautiful like orange red yellow colors like oh my god it looks like paint strokes but it is deep it is deep like you're on top of a mountain and then there's a waterfall multiple waterfalls going over and then this beautiful blue river flowing through it oh my god talk about you want to make your problems feel small you want to feel insignificant in the best way possible get out into nature get out into nature you will forget everything that has ever bothered you before because i was standing on top

of there and i was like wow wow how lucky are we to live this life to be out here to get to experience to get to live on a planet that is as cool as this i felt like i was on a different planet i felt like i was in a star wars movie seeing some of this shit like i was like this is not earth but it is and how lucky are we that we get to be able to get out and experience it so i'm begging if you are a young person or an old person honestly i don't give a fuck what your age get out there go experience go live go see go view you will have such a time of your life that it is something that you will never forget about but i will get dementia i will get alzheimer's i will forget everything but i will never forget this that's for fucking sure core memory and it

really has kind of like switched something in my brain where i'm like the rest of my 20s i really want to spend traveling like i really want to just get out there and go and experience so if you are you know what under 40 period if you're listening to this and you're under 40 and you have time where you're like not yet settled and you don't know what you want to do yet go out there and go view go experience because this world is so vast and ever-changing we only drove like 12 hours and the amount of different kind of like views and things that the earth got to show us was incredible imagine what the other side of the world looks like do you know what I mean so anyways the theme for the next year I think is like high in a national park no we did

not not smoke weed in a national park do not light up do not smoke cigarettes do not light up with a lighter in a national park you do not need to burn a national park down but best believe I'm gonna rip my pen just a couple times before going and looking at things of course and make it a little bit more beautiful but wow so incredible so gorgeous we saw animals we saw so many animals it's baby season we saw bears black bears and their cubs we saw brown bears and their babies just like hanging out bouncing through the woods doing their thing we saw bison babies we saw elk babies we saw deer babies we saw so many animals it was so beautiful and it's so nice because it's like no you're in their territory this isn't your territory this isn't for the people this is for

the animals oh my god so beautiful so wonderful and then yeah we really just spent our last couple days going exploring Yellowstone and then ending back up at our cabin and smoking weed on the back porch and staring at the mountains surrounding us and looking at the stars last night there was this one beautiful incredible sunset that was just like the chef's kiss of everything like we had not really seen a sunset and it was just so incredible and colorful and it was just what I needed for our last night so we did 10 days off grid in yellowstone in wyoming and montana exploring getting lost seeing volcanoes seeing acid pits and pools hiking through the mountains swimming in fresh waterfalls swimming in crystal clear glacier lakes and glitter tubes on horseback

running around the mountains picking wildflowers drinking at the cowboy bar and line dancing I could not have asked for a better fucking time honestly and I did it side by side with some incredible amazing beautiful smart brilliant loving women and what's better than that honestly honestly also I left my boyfriend at home for 10 days alone and you know you're in a secure relationship when you can leave them at home and you're not worried no anxiety no nothing I I was gone and he's a Scorpio so he gets possessive let me be real he gets very possessive and he did not worry once that's how you know you're in a healthy secure loving relationship where it's like no you go be your own individual I'll be here when you get back I just want you to

go have fun enjoy because listen I've been with some insecure men and I know if I was still with them and I did a 10-day trip they would have stopped talking to me halfway through they would have started ignoring me they would have caused a fight blah blah blah blah I'm so lucky to have a partner who encourages and uplifts my alone time and my exploration as an individual I'm so thankful for that um we got home and they lost one of my bags I knew my bag was gonna be too heavy okay Southwest they give you two bags shout out to them I only packed one my bad sorry and it was over 50 pounds so she goes oh well it's a hundred dollars well what's the next option or you can buy at the counter a southwest duffel for twenty dollars and then you can throw in all your

extra shit and you get two free bags i love southwest i only fly southwest honestly and so i bought my twenty dollar duffel i threw all my shit in there it did not show up it did not show up it did not show up anyways shout out to the girl at the counter she's like oh yeah it'll probably show up on the next flight we'll give you a call whatever also if you come pick it up yourself which i don't live that far from the airport um she's like we'll give you a 200 voucher so best believe we'll be catching another flight soon shout out to you southwest um and shout to the lady who was like no buy this duffel because it's really foldable and you fold up real easy you put it in your bag when you go somewhere and then everything you buy you put in your duffel

and you check both of them who would have fucking thought honestly um so yeah i gotta go pick that up next I have been talking for way too long I'm sure you guys love hearing me talk it was a lot to catch up on I just really wanted to sit down and chat with you guys it was such a fun fun fun experience I might do a little bit longer of an episode so I can get to as many of your questions as you can as I can but let's get into a little fire round episode get to all the questions but yeah I had such a fucking blast and it was so nice it just really puts everything in a new perspective and really just makes you thankful for being able to be here and experience this world and get to see as much as you possibly can i really really encourage all of you to go out to

experience to enjoy to just see what the world has to offer but outside of like well obviously culture is such an experience and food and all that but get off the grid if you are tired of being here and being around people get off the fucking grid because that's how i was feeling i was like oh my god I can't do it anymore you guys I'm losing my mind and then I just like ran off into the woods for like 10 days and all of a sudden refreshed renewed have a gusto for life again and honestly it is so nice so hopefully this inspired you book a trip honestly book a trip go out go experience go enjoy so fucking worth it but let's smoke finally and let's get into your questions you guys i haven't smoked out of a b-o-n-g in quite some time quite some time

that's for sure um since i literally was only smoking dab pens and um lots of joints at least 30 joints maybe more honestly now that i'm thinking about it but cheers this will be fun to smoke together i missed you all let's hit this oh so nice i kind of lined it up perfectly as well where i got home last night and then i have today off to film and edit and stuff and then tomorrow off and then i don't work until wednesday so that's really nice just to kind of recoup and do some laundry and luckily i have a boyfriend who like takes care of himself so i didn't really have to do anything when I came home you know other than like maybe some grocery shopping and planning for the week so love that for me still kind of like on vacation mode which is nice and

on to bigger and better things I'm putting in my two weeks at my old restaurant on Saturday I'm scared but also round of applause for me I it's just time it's time I've been there for four years it's time to move on it's time to free myself every time i break a cycle even if it's good or you know outgrow something and i allow myself to naturally move on the universe always gifts me with something so i'm so excited to see the blessings that are about to flow my way um but a lot of you guys submitted questions so let's not waste any more time and let's get right into it why do i always attract the worst kinds of people am i the problem no um i think the worst kinds of people are attracted to the best kinds of people because they're jealous of that energy

and they want to feed off of it and suck on it like a vampire until you have no energy left and they have just fed off of you so if anything it has more to do with you being good than you being bad but the good people always attract way more bad people you just need to stand strong and understand how to kind of like work through that and you know make those people not stick to you or have morals or have values that allow yourself to release these people or not get attached to them so they don't suck you drive all of your energy I don't know how to hit on my crush and I also think he's out of my league and he won't want me no such thing no such thing I think you have to do a little bit of like crazy girl planning where it's like let me stalk him a

little bit listen listen i did this with my boyfriend too i think it's very natural for women to want to do where it's like i have to win him over i have to win him over but don't go after men who don't want you at least like put yourself out there and give yourself an opportunity because more times than not they're gonna say yes than no but if they do say no don't take it personally and just move on with your life you know don't pine after someone who doesn't fucking want you that is a quick way to lose yourself immediately so i say do a little stalking you know find out his interests stalk his mom on facebook no i'm kidding but like do a little bit of research understand his hobbies his activities and then just put yourself out there

bring something up be like oh hey do you want to study together i don't know if he's like in your class do you want to study together uh maybe she like loves this one anime and you guys have that in common i don't know find some sort of thing where you guys have something in common and then bring it up but bring it up at the right time you gotta wait you gotta wait you gotta play the long game and bring it up at the right time or simply just be like hey I like your shoes and then move on with your day quickly it's a great way to break the ice without having to like dive in deeper and then they're aware of your presence a little bit more especially if you've never talked before just be like oh hey nice shoes oh hey nice shirt oh what you said in class is cool and then just

move on quickly you could like run away immediately let him think about you overnight let let them think let them observe let them fantasize and then you know slowly start talking some more I love like the hunt though that's so fun I of course had to do that with my boyfriend and he did that with me and that's why I did it worked out you know you got to be you got to match each other's freak you got to both be a little crazy what's your favorite crystal um I just bought a rose quartz and garnet ring um rose quartz is definitely one of my favorite crystals as well as turquoise I don't know if you would consider that a crystal but I do wear quite a lot of it my great grandmother was a metal smith how fucking cool and she worked with turquoise so I have a lot

of her jewelry and I feel like it brings me a lot of good energy and then specifically another crystal that I've always gravitated towards which I think everybody does just because it's so fucking gorgeous is opals um my boyfriend bought me this opal ring for my birthday I also have another opal ring and then i wear my opal and diamond necklace every single day i feel like as long as i have opals on me i feel good um first opal piece of jewelry that i ever got so sweet everybody in my class was getting class rings and my parents always remember getting class rings i didn't get a letter letterman jacket or whatever because i didn't have letters girl i was an art class you think they're giving me letters for that let's be real so they're like we'll get

you a ring you know you pick out a piece of jewelry we'll get you a piece of jewelry and i mean it's not like a david yearman twelve thousand dollar blah blah blah it was like probably like a 150 200 etsy piece or like ebay piece but it was this gorgeous opal like ring and i wore it too often the thing with opals is they're pretty fragile and i broke a couple of them so i stopped wearing it but after i wore that i feel like i always have to have it on me not only is it like a representation of like growing and like my parents love my love for myself but also it's is gorgeous hey how to have a confident sexy hot girl summer so i was reading eve babbitts i really wanted to bring her book with me i feel like she's just a great older woman to read and look up to

she's a great way of visualizing the world and finding enjoyment in all of it even if it if a little bit is like negative she always finds like a positive outcome and a lot of her writing is about other women and women that she finds inspiring or maybe like experiences that she had with those women even if they were fleeting but like why she was drawn to them and one of the things that she said about like being powerful and having purpose is there was this like girl that she's growing up with in high school that she loved and just like looked up to and had so much fun with and they were like she's like I didn't know power came from understanding yourself like how silly she just knew who she was and that's why she was so powerful over all these

men in the high school or all these women who wanted them to be her to be in their like sorority or be in their group it was she knew who she was and she did not give a fuck about anything else and that's what brought her power it's funny because she was like how silly like that's so funny that power is simply just understanding who you are and not denying yourself of that but there is so much power in that like listen i'm a weird silly girl like i'm not like a la 10 i'm not a New York 10 I don't have fillers to the fucking sky blah blah blah you know I don't fit a lot of these criteria that I think a lot of people think like power and beauty is but I fit all of them because I know I am and I believe in myself and I just think I'm worth so so much whether I

fit into those categories or not I know I have purpose and power because I know in my worth and I believe in my worth and I think really being a hot sexy confident confident girl this summer is simply just being like I don't give a fuck I'm here to exist and live and enjoy and be peaceful and I know I'm sexy and hot so other people know I'm sexy and hot like if you believe in yourself other people will also believe in you as well how do you deal with girls that have bad vibes let me give you the tea okay girl give me the tea I'm ready but I have encountered a lot of mean girls especially as an adult and a lot of their meanness just comes from like girl why are you being weird and judgmental as an adult that's embarrassing that's embarrassing like oh my god girl like i

really tried to break that in me young being like judgmental or mean or like gossiping too much about one person listen a little tea little kiki little gossip is fine all right but don't like have that girl's mouth and or name in your mouth 24 7 that's weird that's weird very high school of you babe and that is weird as an adult so when to deal with girls with bad vibes sometimes you just got to be like moving on turn your back walk away i encountered a lot of these like older mean women on our trip just because like i'm a young hot girl what am i gonna say you know what i mean be the woman at the rodeo who sees the young hot girls and is like i love you girls you're having so much fun i want to hang out with you like let me buy you a drink let me hang out with you girls

like let's yeehaw together not the one who's like shoulder checking you in a fucking gift shop that's when i hit them with the excuse me and then i turn my back and walk away sometimes you just got to check them and move on real quick like that was weird let me move on but don't you know return and keep going and mulling after it and seeking revenge over small things because that makes you just as bad as them think about it think about it sometimes i feel like my boyfriend doesn't care about important stuff what do i do men are fucking stupid sometimes but they should not be so stupid that it inconveniences your life do you know what i mean do you know what i mean sometimes you just have to match each other's stupid sometimes you have to not care about the

same things but as a woman in a relationship and who has been in many bad relationships the one major piece of relationship advice I can give you is you need to care about the same things you need to have the same morals you need to have the same goals you need to be growing on the same pace you need to be enjoyers of the same things even if you're not enjoying the same thing that you know your partner might be like bitch I can't skateboard I'm still gonna be like oh let me cheer you on for my blanket with my book you know like enjoyers of each other and if you feel like he doesn't care about a lot of the things that you don't care about it's because he doesn't but also you don't have to be with someone who doesn't care about the things you care about

like if you want to celebrate your monthiversary fantastic that's amazing keep that enjoyment of love in your heart but find someone who wants to share that with you if your man looks at you and goes monthiversary that's fucking stupid he does not like you i hate to say it i really hate to say it he doesn't like you and that's okay that's fine why would you stay with someone who doesn't like you or doesn't have the same morals or values or enjoyment of life you have a choice you have a choice on who your partner is you have a choice on how much fun you guys have together sometimes you just got to realize the inconveniences and the inconsistencies and you got to be like it's okay i'll just try someone else you know you know you have time girl you're not young the clock's not

ticking or you're not old clock's not ticking you have time to try men on for size and see if they fit they're like cowgirl boots all right are they gonna give me blisters and make my life worse or do they have that nice arch support and they're gonna make my life comfortable for me and fashionable anyways someone said i've just finished school so anything to do with that love you i love you congratulations that is so exciting school is so stay educated please please i'm begging you stay educated that's the one biggest regret of my life is not finishing college please stay educated please go to college but also i understand it's not for everybody but like if you're there already girl finish it just get it over with i know it's hard but like please

keep going it will be so worth that you'll be so much more confident in yourself understanding in yourself also it's never too late to go back something i've always thought of i just need to figure out what I exactly want to do and what would be best for me and where but for now I'm happy where I am and that's important but if you just finished school and you're looking around aimlessly and you're like well now what the fuck do I do that's okay that's how everybody's feeling you're supposed to feel that way because the world has literally just opened itself up to you and when an oyster open it opens itself up and has thousands of pearls it's gonna be hard to pick just one singular pearl okay so don't worry too much a you deserve a good break you do if you

just finish something incredibly hard such as like high school or college you finished four years of school you deserve a little bit of a break give yourself a little spa day girl book yourself an hour massage take the summer off if that's what you want to do enjoy life maybe get a little summer job whatever part-time but like it's okay to take a little bit of a break if you want to take like a bigger break such as like maybe a gap year or whatever it's called go be like a little ranger in the summer somewhere go be you know a au pair abroad go experience go enjoy life have a little break take a little break if you need so but if you want to stay on track and like keep going after your passions and pursue what you were studying I think after school the best thing you can do is a

get a little part-time job i i don't care about the pay it doesn't have to be a big girl job you're not going to get like a quote-unquote big girl ceo job right out of college let's be real let's be real you can look you can have fun and work at the fucking local ice cream shop you can also have fun and be like a little part-time intern at a newspaper magazine locally or at a retail shop or uh i don't know what you're studying a law firm i don't a doctor's office like you could be a receptionist for the summer just enjoy you know keep practicing get your toes in the water that will help you secure the quote-unquote big girl jobs later on is having experience so if you want to like keep pursuing your passions and keep staying in the field so to say get a little

internship go to some extra classes go you know get a little part-time job it doesn't necessarily have to be something big but also i think the most important thing is congratulations round of applause for you that's fucking hard if you want to take a little bit of a break that's valid don't let your parents nagging you being like where's your job where's your job where's your job freak you out we are not on the same level back as where it was with them okay my parents got out of college and immediately got jobs i mean to be fair they were teachers and that was a whole different thing back then i don't know if i want to be a teacher now that's a lot to deal with and you guys are so brave you were so so brave you were on the front lines but like back then you could get out of

college immediately get a job immediately buy a house off of the minimum wage salary the government was giving you nowadays not so much so don't let your parents nagging bother you at all at all enjoy relish in your successes all right you deserve to be proud of yourself how to feel more in tuned with life i think it's all about the little things and finding peace and enjoyment and fulfillment in it whether it's your morning coffee or a book that you get to read a chapter of every night um the little things do make up your day okay when you look back and you remember the day before you're not remembering well maybe you are remembering the mundane but usually you're remembering like the small little gems throughout your day maybe the bad things but listen mostly

the small little gems throughout your day you just have to look for them okay girl you're crystal mining in your own life of life experiences so get to work find joy find peace in the small things whether it's your commute to work where you get to listen to the local radio your more your coffee in the morning um your lunch break at work where you get to eat something yummy maybe it's a free meal your work provided you maybe it's oh my god finally getting off work whatever it is look for those little gems i think also disappearing for a while is healthy okay getting off the grid is healthy whether it's like for 10 days like i did or just simply going to your local park and taking a walk and disconnecting from like people and reconnecting to nature i think reconnection to

nature is like very important to feel in tune with life whether it's going to your local hiking area and just going on a little five minute walk whether it's going to a hike to a creek whether it's going to the local swimming pool i don't care get out connect with nature touch grass like for real it will make you be like oh no life is good fuck the people who make life hard let me focus on enjoyment and the third I think is staying in tune with yourself to stay in tune with life you have to be connected with yourself um and I asked for for my boyfriend a journal for my birthday I've had many journals throughout my life they just really haven't ever been like exactly how I wanted it so I took the time and I did some research on a journal that I thought I would

enjoy and use quite often I got a fuchsia pink leather bound um journal with no lines so I could draw I could doodle I could write I could do whatever and that's what I asked for my for my birthday and of course he provided but I've been using it a lot especially on my girls trip and I feel like to feel in tune with life you must feel in tune with yourself and a great way to feel in tune with yourself is just having that daily little check-in you know for me my intentional daily check-in is in my journal where i'm writing down all my thoughts and i'm writing down all my feelings um maybe it's in your notes app maybe it's like talking out loud to yourself in the shower or on your commute home whatever it is have those daily checkups with yourself i think

it's a great way to stay in tune not only with yourself but also in tune with life so someone said my ex-boyfriend has the hugest d but he's a mega pussy how to cope i listen i genuinely don't believe dick size matters listen i understand like maybe a one incher is not ideal but most dicks are gonna be average size i don't think you deserve rights as a man based on your dick size i think you deserve rights as a man based on like how you treat people okay if you're kind and nice and gentle as a man in my brain that immediately adds three extra inches on like let's be real all of a sudden you have like a massive peen in my mind because big dick energy is not physical it's mental always always and there's gonna be a lot of awful men with large

penises out there i do not think they deserve rights whatsoever okay especially not rights to that nine incher okay just because he has a massive dick doesn't mean he deserves your attention there's a lot a lot a lot a lot of really good men out there with massive dicks if that's what you're looking for but once again i've talked about dick size before and i don't like i like i said it doesn't matter i genuinely believe like so your canal vaginal canal is different sizes everybody's is different sizes different shapes different lengths your uterus is gonna move differently women are not this cookie cutter copy and paste that we think we are the same way like all dicks are maybe gonna look different or be cut different or whatever vaginas are the same way

it's not cookie cutter how they explain it to you in fucking elementary physical education it's gonna be different sizes gonna be different shapes it's gonna be different lengths so really like cinderella's slipper you should be looking for the man with the perfect girth with the perfect length for you whether it's four inches or maybe you've got a deeper one and you need nine i don't know we're all different those two things and then a perfect mouth not only for eating but also for spewing words of kindness you will find that man eventually but if a man is awful i don't think he deserves rights ever ever put him in jail literally immediately huge d who cares go find someone who's nice and i guarantee they probably have a huge penis attached to them i promise you

okay what to do when you're not feeling mentally in tune or motivated love you by the way i love you um when you're not feeling like in tune with yourself or motivated in a direction and where you need to go it's because you're not dreaming enough babe I'm begging you please start dreaming start setting goals start having plans make a life Pinterest board and just look at pretty pictures and whether you believe that picture is going to happen for you or not pin it that's how I like have like a constant mood board going for myself whether it's like an intentional preset mood board where I'm like taking images and collaging and physically cutting out or it's just like a constant one going where it's like maybe i'm saving cute pictures on instagram or i'm saving

cute pictures to my life board on pinterest um create some dreams for yourself set some goals whether it's small like i want to be that girl in that bubble bath taking a hot bubble bath and then you make it happen for yourself or it's like i want to be that girl on that horse in those mountains and then you make it happen for yourself big or small you need to dream you need to set goals and start small. Honestly, start achieving the small things. You want to be the girl who journals. Guess what? You can be her. You can try it out for size. And if you're not that girl and doesn't work out, move on. And guess what? If it sticks, you have a new hobby, a new activity to add to your life. Be that girl who does the face mask. Go grab a $1.99 face mask from Target and

put it on and chill. Light a candle. Guess what? Now you are that girl. You are what you make of yourself and if you're feeling out of touch with yourself and out of touch with life and unmotivated it's because you're not setting and achieving goals and goals don't need to be big such as accomplishing college if you did that fantastic very hard incredible so proud of you but it doesn't have to be this big societal goals that people talk about most often because it's the easiest to brag about because it's hard to achieve sometimes it can be like you know what I showered for the first time in weeks today and I'm proud of myself you know they don't have to be crazy maybe it's I'm gonna do my nails I'm gonna cut my hair I'm gonna dye my hair I want to be that

girl with pink hair so now I'm the girl with pink hair I want to be the girl who wears heels so now I wear heels I want to be the girl who wears skirts and I wear skirts skirts I want to be the girl who eats salads so now I eat salads I want to be the girl who blah blah blah blah make sure they're healthy and intentional like they do connect with you in some sort of way not just like a oh i'm jealous so i want to attach and be this focus on visualizing who you want to be in the future and then obtaining those things but i do genuinely believe that starts with dreaming and i'm more of like a visual dreamer rather than like a thinker i mean i think all the fucking time but not in that kind of way um i'm more like a visualizing kind of person especially since i'm

very artistic like a lot of my thinking is visualizing so i really believe like there are healthy apps on this planet there's a healthy way to use your phone if you're scrolling on pinterest for hours saving pins to your life board or your dreams board that's a healthy way to use your phone and that is a practical way to use your phone and also it's a very practical way to develop and start to game plan some dreams for yourself so go after it get to enjoying get to dreaming daydreaming i was always told was so unhealthy for me but honestly i think it has made me set and achieve goals faster than anything has in my life someone said will you be doing another recipe i will i will be uh posting another recipe on thursday there's actually something that

i ate on my road trip that was like incredible incredible it was at the dim sum place they were called fire crackers and basically they were like jalapeno stuffed crab rangoons in a sense so wait and see i'll be posting that recipe video on thursday they were so yummy and i feel like they're really great to just make it not really in the summer they're kind of heavy but hey midwest princess it out cream cheese stuffed jalapenos are like the most midwest princess meal ever so it's a take on that i'll be posting that on thursday stay tuned i make cosmic brownies before my trips and i post posted them um last week so if you want to see my cosmic brownie recipe go give it a watch they are the brownies that i made all through college to pay for

my activities and my tuition you just don't have to use regular butter if you don't want to wink wink someone said budgeting slash spending too much money lol trying to stop i need to get on board with that after going on this trip because best believe i was swiping my card everywhere i went everywhere and honestly i mean what am i what else am i working for you know i want that hoodie I'm buying that hoodie I want that t-shirt I'm buying that t-shirt like I'm on vacation I'm going to spend some money let's be real but I can't live my vacation spending in my real life so I'm having to kind of like do some math and reevaluate a little bit um a I think setting budgeting goals for yourself a download a budgeting app that breaks down like where you

spend the most money so you can visualize like oh I spend most of my money on food or oh I spend most of my money on shopping or oh I spend most of my money on that morning coffee that I have every day and then think like okay what's a realistic goal I can set how often can I have that coffee how much money am I going to spend a week on groceries how much money am I going to spend a week on shopping whatever it is set a budget for yourself and then it's literally life is a video game we are playing the game of life we are playing the game of monopoly in real time I highly recommend visualizing your life as that I think it makes it way more easier to break down and kind of like give into the society simulation a little bit easier where it's like hello I'm

playing a video game beep boop bop like the real living is escaping to the mountains or like getting out in nature but like the video game living is like I gotta figure out taxes I gotta budget a little bit so think of it like that I think it's a little bit easier to grasp onto and like have enjoyment doing but stick to your goals you know you can be the girl that budgets you just got to create a budget and stick to it um but yeah i think really just finding out where you spend the most money and trying to cut back a little bit as a at a time is a great way to budget like you don't have to go cold turkey you can cut back like a hundred dollars a month and slowly dwindle down to where your actual goal wants to be someone said fucking my ex in love

with my co-worker this is big idiot time you know at least you're aware at least you're aware we all find ourselves in the pits of bad choices and at least you're aware because you know now this is not the best thing to be doing so you're one step closer to making change and actually being on the right path um if you're fucking your ex and in love with your co-worker i say step away from boys or love for a while and step into yourself step into being selfish a little bit maybe this is your selfish time though then enjoy it listen we all make mistakes we all have those days so you'll grow out eventually i promise someone said where to next on your travels um realistically i'm gonna say la because i've been itching to get to la for a while i just they're in their

june gloom season and i don't want to go to la while it's cloudy and rainy so i think we're gonna go later in the summer I might do another little smaller road trip back to Arkansas I had a blast there it was a great way to kind of escape a little bit and see new areas but I don't think I'll be going anywhere like big like taking a flight anywhere until LA we'll probably go for like my boyfriend's birthday or something and then after that honestly I'm really want to start planning in a broad trip I want to do like two weeks out in Europe gallivanting around I have a friend in spain i want to go visit him um i have a friend who went to rome so like i want to go with her and go experience rome with her um and i want to go to amsterdam and i want to go see the palace

of versailles and see where marie antoinette laid her little head and connect that way but i think my next big trip is definitely going to be abroad and then i also want to start working on another national park trip um america is beautiful it is gorgeous i realized why there's so many tourists from abroad visiting here when I was younger and I went to Yellowstone I was like why are people flying to our country to come see this it's because you literally can't see it anywhere else this is like a once in a lifetime place to visit and I'm trying to visit more of those places so I think I also want to plan another national park trip but that's really all I have planned so far I'll probably do like a pacific northwest national park trip

um over any other area someone said hiking slash adventuring essentials oh so good hiking boots thick ass socks um i wore a bunch of like rompers i felt like that was the easiest to hike in than like tight shorts and a tank top or like a workout bra um some sort of like matching set like a romper very simple very easy a pack of poncho if you think it's gonna rain or like a raincoat um where we were hiking it was really hot so bring enough water bug spray sunscreen good sunglasses a sandwich for later maybe a protein bar and i really honestly think that's it you just need to make sure no bugs are gonna bite you and kill you that the sun's not gonna fry your skin up that your feet aren't gonna be hurting okay some thick socks some really good hiking boots um put your

hair back put it up pin it up braid it whatever it is and then some comfy comfy hiking clothes also one hiking essential there are two maybe that I really don't use that often a hats um I finally bought a bucket hat for myself while I was in Yellowstone because I was like my face and my scalp is just getting fried I need a hat so a hat and then also I bought these like silver lined pee wipes they're like reusable cloth wipes so after you pee you're not just like drip drying my other friend she had like one of those funnels to pee out of and honestly that seemed really nice but i didn't know how i was gonna clean that like these you just throw in the wash with your clothes and it's easy peasy so i bought some of those so then i wasn't like

drip drying or like hiking in my pee gross gross like i need something to wipe with that's not a leave so that's what really really was nice for me how do i invite god to pour some sugar on me oh my god i love this question um honestly pour some sugar on me god please i really just believe it's like hmm oh great question a opening yourself up to possibilities don't close yourself off to one specific idea one specific path one specific thought open yourself up bitch they lost my bags and I was like you know what whatever I'll just get them when they get here like you guys know they didn't make it on the plate and so obviously they're being tracked I'll just get it when I get here and then they were like oh yeah and here's a $250 voucher opened myself up don't be a dick

um open yourself to paths open yourself to life open yourself to experiences if your friends like I want to go to Montana for a vacation be like you know what not a place I would have thought of but fuck it let's go if your friends like I want to go hike this place I want to go to this restaurant i want to go here fuck it whatever let's go try it out open yourself up to experiences open yourself up to god and blessings and i think they will flow towards you tenfold i think opening yourself up to yourself as well and connecting with yourself will always be received well to the blessings of the universe um especially because you're not going to be putting yourself in dangerous situations you're not going to be putting

yourself in bad situations you're not going to be acting against yourself because you know who you are you stand strong to that you will receive ultimately more blessings for that um and yeah being open and being connected to yourself and also being connected to the world around you giving kindness to people offering forgiveness to people um being just a general positive person in other people's lives will bring more genuine positive people towards you they will recognize that and they want to follow in that and they will want to surround themselves in you so you will receive the blessings and some sugar from god physically from people around you that way so i think honestly those are kind of the best tips i can give but the universe god whatever

you believe in wants to pour goodness into you it wants to pour some sugar on you it wants to provide good things for you you need to be accepting and understanding and recognize those good things though okay don't put yourself into dangerous situations don't put yourself into compromising situations in the name of what because i know you don't know what it is follow your intuition follow what you believe in stand strong in your goals give peace and prosperity to other people provide kindness to other people provide kindness to yourself provide generosity to the world around you be in touch with the world around you physically mentally spiritually the universe will bless you tenfold be grateful for what you have because you

have a lot whether you believe you don't you do look around you identify it give thanks because this life is so bountiful and we take a lot for fucking granted so find enjoyment and prosperity and peace and gratitude in what you have whether it seems like a lot or not there are people out there who always have less so give thanks the universe will bless you tenfold for finding peace and enjoyment in what you have versus seeking and searching for what you don't I love you I think this is the end of our podcast I'm so sorry I know I talked so long about my trip but I really wanted to go over it and kind of maybe provide some inspiration for you guys and really just tell you how important the national parks are and how beautiful they really can be and even if they are

only like 12 hours away that's not that far you can basically be in another world in 12 hours if you need to escape go escape if you want to become a park ranger go become a park ranger if you want to go on a trip go on a trip get out there experience live life life is meant to be lived and enjoyed and seeked and sought after so get out there go create the life you want to live for yourself it is waiting for you but with that being said i love you all so very much if you want your question answered i will be doing a patreon only podcast on thursday patreon.com slash smoke shoddy um so i will go over every single question there probably be longer since i didn't do one last week because i was off the grid um and if you want to see more from me see pictures follow

me on instagram at hannah marlene and with that being said smoke a bowl for me and i'll see you on next week of smoke sesh you