Smoke Sesh - sex, love, vulnerability & being a burden

Episode Date: June 29, 2022

Happy Wednesday! This week we do a roulette of questions and I cover hundreds of topics. We talk new moon rituals and what hannah was up to this cancer new moon. Why we are crying a lot this season and how to let emotions flow. Heartbreak & the five stages of grief. We talk acne, bikinis, hannah’s go to guac recipe and how to find your depression meal. Intimacy, credit cards, selfish spirituality and toxic astrology. It’s ok to be a burden and when do you really need to cut someone off? And much much much much more. Thank you so much for joining me today and please submit all questions to my Instagram @ hannahmarlene to get featured in a Smoke Sesh episode and I’ll see you all next week! MUAH!

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, just somebody to look out for them. Some people call me their fairy smoke mother, others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash. So come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life. The good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing, I've got a story for it all. Hello lovelies, how we doing? How's that cancer new moon treating us? because I cried four, five times yesterday. I don't know. I'm usually, okay, let's get into it.

How are you doing? I should probably ask that before I just jump right into it. Sorry. I had a double espresso latte this morning, so my mind is going a million miles per hour. Anyways, cancer new moon last night how we feeling how are those emotions you know are we dealing with them correctly are you really listening to our inner self correctly are we taking the time we need to feel these emotions fully probably not because i know i'm not but the powerful cancer new moon was last night approximately at 10 52 um this potent new moon energy brings us immense manifestation capabilities now is the time to clarify your goals focus on your intentions and open the doorway to your highest purpose in this lifetime we go through so many cycles cycle upon cycle upon cycle

and it's good you know we should go through these cycles we should keep learning we should keep growing we should get to these points in our life where we feel this necessity to rejuvenate this necessity to you know not start over but to continue on does that make sense um i posted a meme on my instagram story sorry um if you don't follow me you go follow me um it's at hannah marlene but my favorite size swoon you already know she is the best at making memes that really just like cultivate the human emotion and the human process um and she made a meme about cycles that was like thinking about changing your life and getting excited about it to actively changing your life and feeling vulnerable afraid and deeply uncomfortable which i think is kind of

you know the next step i feel like the full moon cycles um the full moon i feel very drained tired you know i need some some me time for sure the new moon i feel this restlessness and this energy and this heightened energy in the world this like start of a new cycle um and it makes me think about you know changing your life and it makes me get excited about it but I feel like a lot of people do not take those steps they ignore the red flags they ignore those gut feelings they ignore the nagging that your brain brings you because actively changing your life makes you feel vulnerable, afraid, and deeply uncomfortable. But I think the key kind of concept here is, you know, good decisions are not always going to be comfortable. The best decisions for you

are not always going to be the easiest. The best decisions for you are going to feel a little weird it first and they're gonna make you a little uncomfortable we must like uncomfortable i mean we must make ourselves uncomfortable in order to reach these new heights you know like people go on these mountain climbs these giant hikes these literally like like scaling boulders that shit's terrifying for them but it's all about the journey it's all about getting to the end and growing and progressing they put themselves in uncomfortable situations in order to adapt to the new change which brings a feeling of hopeful and capableness you know after you make it through the climb you know you reach the summit you're almost there and you've adapted to the feeling

of that scared that um that you know uncomfortable feeling and now you feel hopeful and capable time passes and then the change is now the norm we've entered the new moon cycle again and it is now time to change again once we stop changing once we stop growing that's when you know the negatives fall in that's when you know we become susceptible to um minimal uh minimalities is that a fucking word let me google that like i'm trying to think of a word for like minimalism but used in a sense of i just come up you guys ever listen to this podcast and you're like she is straight up making up words minimality yeah okay the state or quality of being minimal i'm telling you i just i i understand anyways we just like suscept ourselves to the the least quantity necessary

the least quantity of life experience the least quantity of personal experience necessary and we feel that hunger that need for change so i think the biggest kind of concept i can really push to you guys right now especially you know cancer new moon or feeling these heightened emotions we're feeling this itchiness to change to grow we've entered the midsummer season um and i think it's very important to be aware of those to understand where they're coming from and to make the change necessary rip the fucking band-aid off you know what i mean like if you slowly pull that band-aid and each hair is ripping out one at a time yeah not fun that shit's gonna hurt rip that shit off get going put yourself in the uncomfortable because i guarantee what's gonna

to come after it is way way more worth it than than the you know complicitness within your life um i celebrated the new moon by crying a lot like i said i spent the morning well um eating indian food i finally got my butter chicken from last episode that i was just constantly talking about it i'm so sorry and then i was constantly talking about it and i literally went to go get it closed i was like of course the one day my favorite indian restaurant is closed great anyways i ended up getting it loved it some butter chicken some naan oh my god it's so good they give you giant fucking portions so i was able to eat it again for lunch and it's just as good one thing that i've recently realized is so in my kitchen i don't have a lot of counter space when i

upload a um apartment tour i'll show you guys my kitchen and everything but i don't have a lot of counter space and so one thing that i've kind of sworn off is microwaves i was like okay i need a microwave right like i moved in here i didn't have a lot of shit looking at microwaves those bitches are like 150 dollars why are they so expensive so i've sworn off microwaves and i've only been using my oven to heat up food, which, you know, I've realized is way easier than I thought. And it's great at heating up food. And it tastes so much better. Very strange, never would have thought. Well, you know, secrets in life, the easiest route is not always the best. You know, take your time, put your care, put your energy into something. And, you know, it turns out just

as good as it was um but for the for the new moon i you know relaxed in the morning i'm sorry i didn't get a podcast out to you yesterday i worked at two o'clock i was the opener at my restaurant um so and i got to my house at like 11 so there was not a lot of time for me to actually sit down and talk and hang out with you guys and i want to put good content out like i said um this will probably be the only podcast for the week just because I'm working a lot this week um and I'm also finishing up some videos and some Patreon stuff so bear with me but this will be a great episode um and I worked yesterday and I was not expecting to I was asking the universe like I put up a little altar and everybody was asking me like what my altar is and um looking at it right now I

have my tarot deck which I pull from whenever needed whenever I need guidance from the universe people are always asking me like what's my favorite like spread for tarot what's my favorite like way to use it and first of all I've stopped using it for other people I feel like my capabilities are more so drawn to myself and I also went to a psychic once who when I was doing a lot of tarot readings they were like this is like depleting your energy this is draining you and you're not able to cultivate like the right answers that you used to so just stop doing it for other people use it for like an inward looking kind of thing and I feel like whenever people think of tarot they think of the three card spread the past present future and although that is a good spread

especially when you're asking for deep deep answers my personal favorite is simply just waking up every morning or anytime that you remember during the day and doing a one card poll whenever you need it in your life or like once a day um I feel like that is really great it really sets me up for the intentions of the day um right now I have the queen of wands um on my um altar I also have some geodes that I've collected um from my area from like just hiking around some oyster shells from my area as well i have a beautiful gold and um mother of pearl like um it's like a little case it's vintage i found it at the thrift store i thought it's just a beautiful holder for my crystals i have some beetle wings in there i have some various bones

and teeth that i got from oracle which is a incredible store here in kansas city specifically like from animals that I believe like I call to a lot um and it's all naturally um found they literally just take like roadkill they get call-ins and then they have their own taxidermy services where they clean it you know sell it stuff like that bones that I found naturally around the area I have some eucalyptus leaf up there some money some freshwater pearls I have some volcanic rock that my dad gave me um i have a fortune candle up there from oracle as well and then i have just a white candle because i feel like it's really good to bring in new energy and i personally love working with white candles so i feel like people are like oh my god your your altar space has to

be like so intentional every single thing has to have purpose has to have meaning and yes everything up there has had meaning to me um because I've collected it and I've I've got it for a specific intention um but really I think your altar space is all about just setting up a space for you and something that makes you comfortable it makes you proud I feel like my left side of my altar is very dark very natural and my right side of my altar is very light um and yeah I have a great fortune candle up there that's made of beeswax rolled in gold foil has some fresh rose petals in it from a local artisan in Kansas City but I was like sitting in my altar and I was just talking to the universe I think the best way to do it is stay grounded stay on the ground I have a little

floor pillow and I just kneel in front of it and I just talk I just talk openly I light my candles I look at my items I pull a card and I just speak to the universe almost like I'm speaking to you right now and i i feel free to ask for things it's okay to ask for things from the universe um put good intentions out there speak positively about yourself and one thing you know lit my fortune candle and i was like i really need a good day at work i want to make some money you know but as the opener is you know it's it's hit or miss if you're gonna make money just because you're in a weird space where it's like you usually leave before six and people are usually eating after six um so the chances of you getting a big rush is low um well I walked into work and

hit a giant fucking rush literally so many fucking people came in and I was the only server there so I was like thrown the fuck off especially because I wanted to celebrate my new moon um going and seeing Romeo and Juliet in the park um and I wanted to be off early and as soon as I hit that rush I was like fuck i'm not gonna be off early i'm gonna be stuck here what the f also my first table had like an 85 bill and i dropped it off and they were shocked that it was 85 dollars even though like you can see the prices on the menu you know you know what you're ordering right and they were shocked and they tipped me zero dollars even though they were running me back and forth like it's fine you know to tip me very low like I get it but don't every single time I walk up to

your table be like well this is bad well I want this well this is like running me around the restaurant if you're gonna put me to fucking work like you know pay me a little bit of money I can't lie so that threw me for a fucking loop cried a little bit there cried earlier because I still don't have wi-fi in my apartment I've been fucking dealing with that shit um and then I dropped some glasses so that was wonderful and then also i was like stressing because my new moon celebration that i really wanted to get to after work i probably wasn't going to be able to get to things ended up working for me i need to trust in the universe more because i made so much fucking money um i made way more money than an opener really should i left at a good time my

boyfriend met me and had tacos for me and we went to the park and we sat around and you know we didn't get to the play in time but we were able to stop by and watch a little bit of it which was wonderful and incredible and then we walked over to the Nelson and sat in the middle of the park until the sun went down and we drank some sparkling rosé and read a new book that I got which is erotic love poems from ancient greece and rome which is really good i really really recommend um that book i also got um the other day linda goodman's love signs linda goodman is incredible if you are ever interested in astrology she her writing is like like i was laughing out loud the way she was calling me out because i was reading the relationship between uh the gemini

woman and the scorpio male and it was just like nail on the fucking head so fucking funny um but yeah linda goodman any of her writing on astrology i really recommend if you want a credible source um and i got my books at half price books i recently recently been loving half price books just going in there and perusing books especially pre-loved books seeing the energy that they're carrying they have playboys they're like great stuff i also got a kamasutra book but it's really cool because it has like photographs in it which is like kind of a new thing and I also got a book on women's rituals and the history of women's rituals and spiritual rituals that women have been doing throughout centuries I haven't dove into that quite yet but I'm excited to

but yeah I just spent my evening in my in the park with my lover hanging out drinking wine just kind of relaxing and enjoying my night and it was cool because i got to see so many different animals that i like don't ever see like oh my god lightning bugs were everywhere there were wild foxes there were bats catching bugs and like swallows like these beautiful swallows and it ended up being a really really good night um it really did and i just had to trust in the universe and put my fucking heart out there and really just work my ass off and you know the payment comes it really does if you really put yourself out there and ask for what you need and you're open to it and you know susceptible to it the universe will deliver to you so i hope you all had a wonderful

new moon once again pay attention to the cycles pay attention to what your body is telling you um and yeah anyways i don't know why my brain has actually been warped by tiktok but i was in the grocery store getting groceries for my week and i was like hmm lunches why was i craving fucking peppers and like stuffed with cream cheese why tell me why literally my brain is rotted from that app anyways i just made some it was pretty good but i think it's only good because I used jalapeno cream cheese and I used green bell peppers it's fine for a little munchy snack I just feel like I'm gonna have some crazy shits later you know like there's no way those keto bitches have normal shits there's just no way like I'm thinking about it and it's way too

much dairy like way too much it's good don't get me wrong but I'm gonna have to make some real food after this my go-to has really been like a sorry my fan is so fucking loud if you're hearing that but my go-to has been like breakfast burritos and i just make some guac with it oh my god so fucking good anyways we're gonna deep dive into some questions we're gonna do kind of like a russian roulette round a fast round i just want to dive through them because i got so fucking many and all of them are kind of all over the place which i love it's what i asked for and you guys delivered so thank you so fucking much but i want to get to them all so let's get into it okay first question because this girl seemed very desperate and i feel you i got you but she

dm'd me and she goes girl how the how the hell do you move on I am so heartbroken over this boy and I don't even want to be isn't that how it is like the men who approach you first the ones you like low-key didn't even care about the ones you you know had a falling out with those are the ones that seem to hurt the most and I feel you okay but really you have to let in order for you to get over something think of it like this you have to go through these stages of like grief basically which let me look those up um beep bop boop let me do some research i should know this from nursing but i dropped out so of course i don't um okay five stages of grief i feel like this absolutely kind of applies to heartbreak as well um and in order to make it through heartbreak you have to

be willing and open and susceptible to going through the stages if you get stuck on one stage and you are refusing to move to another you're gonna get stuck forever babe so just open yourself up to the emotions that are coming to you like i said cancer season like i don't usually cry but cancer season has me so emotional and so lovey-dovey that i've been crying a lot lately and when I when I get into those emotions when I get in those feelings my first thought isn't why am I crying I shouldn't be crying like this is a bad thing feeling emotions feeling these emotions are very valid they're very important any emotion you feel is very very important just be able to understand where they're coming from and let them flow through you like a river okay

so first one denial you know you get your heart broken you're like what the fuck this isn't real this can't be happening you're bargaining well actually you're not bargaining quite yet but then you get angry because your situation is switching up right you're heartbroken you're angry and I think that one I'm not ever really super duper angry I I it's like a very fleeting feeling and then I'm you kind of move into the bargaining aspect okay where you're like well what if I do this well what if I do this well maybe it'll work if you do this and then you realize okay no you're just trying to hold on to the past and you know you can't really bargain you move into the depression phase which i think is where you might be because you're like kind of holding on to it

and it's okay to be sad it's okay to be heartbroken it's okay to have these feelings that's what i want to let you know it is just important that you keep your life moving while you're going through these feelings okay it's okay to be holed up in your bed eating ice cream every once in a while or for like the first couple days that's okay you know jumping right into the game right away is not always the best emotionally healthy way especially if you need time to process like maybe you didn't process it beforehand some people do process the breakup during the relationship and have a much easier time you know coming out of it some people are blindsided and then they need that morning process so take that time to do that morning process but do not get stuck in it keep it moving

bitch keep it going you gotta get back into your life somehow because then you'll move into the acceptance phase you'll make new cycles you'll make new connections and you i checked your profile you're an aquarius you girly are just stuck on this one thing and as soon as you set your mind to something else i guarantee you'll forget all about this boy you just have to keep putting yourself out there no matter how much it hurts oh my god and i'm telling you this from a place of love like i love you it's okay to take that mourning process for a few days a week do not let it reach a month okay do not get stuck in your fucking bedroom crying over a fucking ugly ass man for a month that is a waste of your life okay you have to get back into your life no matter how much

it hurts build new routines make new friends meet new people go build new memories that are outside of that person you're looking so much on the past because yeah everything up until recently has probably been with that person thinking of that other person so build new memories to look back on where they are not connected to it okay my mom oh my god god god love her she's a gemini woman she is like every time i've been in a breakup she's like okay bitch move on you know like very harsh very harsh but like it cut uh well last breakup wasn't the best but she made tried to make me move on too fast and that like was not helpful like literally day of the breakup I'm sobbing literally he left my shit on my on my parents front porch at like 1am I woke up to it

I was like what the fuck breaking down my mom's like okay well I want to go to a new burger restaurant and you're coming with me and like took me to this vegan burger restaurant and was like why are you in such a bad mood like we're trying to I'm trying to have a daughter's day and I'm like bitch I got broken up with leave me be let me cry give me a hug give me some ice cream you know what I mean it was too soon in the morning process for her to be like okay bitch get over it move on like let's go get some burgers because I was like literally sitting in this like burger restaurant sobbing the poor cashier's like are you okay and I'm like no no I am not um so like i said it's very important to move through these stages okay take that time to feel depressed it's

okay take that time to then get back into your life like i said if it's too early you'll know you'll be crying in a restaurant but don't be afraid to take that next first step i guarantee you'll get into it you'll build new relationship new memories and before you even know it you will be happier without him than you were with him i guarantee i love you stay safe stay sane and once again stop letting ugly men torment you oh someone asked how do i maintain clear skin i've literally tried everything if you're a teenager i really just say okay well first step um figure out your skin type i realized when i was a teenager i had a really oily skin and i was not using a face wash that was designated for that i also have acne prone skin so um like um not acne

prone isn't like hormonal anymore thank god when i was a teenager it was hormonal and unfortunately there was nothing i could really do to help it other than just like don't fucking touch your face which i of course did and of course ruined my fucking skin um because hormonal unfortunately you know it's just based on your hormones they're gonna pop up no matter what the best thing you can do is just leave them be um maybe throw a little pimple patch on it you know don't touch it but my biggest piece of advice is find out your skin type okay and it's really easy to find this out you can feel your face you can feel the dry patches you can feel the oiliness um and go based on that i realize i have a combination skin but more so on the oiliness than i do the dryness

so i don't like super hydrating things like i barely use a moisturizer because when i do it clogs my pores it breaks me out makes my faces more oily um find out your skin type and go and make a regimen based on that if you're like me and you've acne prone skin simply from bacteria i really recommend a benzoyl peroxide wash um uh cereve has one that i've been using for years and i love it i swear by it i have not bought anything else i even use it on my back when i get back knee and stuff and it clears it pretty well um especially when you have like tough skin like on your back and it's like the acne hold on let me just go fucking find it let me find the real name for you i like have to wash my face with this at least once a day i don't do twice a day

because i feel like it's too much but it's the acne foaming cream cleanser if you have like acne prone skin i really recommend it it is kind of like an acne treatment so i feel like it's a two in one um it is like 20 bucks but i think it's so worth it it lasts me forever you really only need like a pea-sized amount so biggest thing is if it's address it from where it's coming from if it's hormonal I mean you can get on hormonal medication that will offset it I tried that with like um what is it oh with like birth control and I felt like that didn't help I feel like that just made me crazier and made my acne worse um so I think it's just important on treating it topically and once again don't touch your face biggest thing I found for not touching my face is pimple patches

um love star face love it incredible I remember I was moving my dad was like what's a star on your face i'm like oh my god it's a pimple patch leave me alone um and then acrylic nails i can't lie with my acrylic nails it makes it impossible for me to pick at my face because i can't get the right angle i can't get in there i realize i do more damage than really getting it and it makes me frustrated so i just have stopped so literally like i've it's like the opposite of declawing i just gave myself claws and now i can't so i hope that helps but i've i've literally been on medication like multiple many forms of medication i went on accutane and i feel like that helped but then my acne kind of changed and it wasn't hormonal anymore and it changed to something else

and so i had to address it from a different standpoint like um so yeah the biggest thing i can say figure out your skin type and do treatment based on that oh my god somebody asked where my bikinis are from shop sydney mary every single fucking time i can't lie every time i get a compliment on a bikini every time somebody's dming about dming me about a bikini it's always shop sydney mary i love her she's incredible it's absolutely worth the investment i've had one of my bikinis for like two plus years and like no strings have broken like i feel like a lot of time even the stitching breaks on like other bikinis that's never happened this one is even like repurposed material with rhinestones and none of the rhinestones have fallen off like

incredible also if you're part of the small titty club um love my big titty girlies wish i was a part of your club unfortunately i'm not so i've had to learn some tips and tricks if the bikini is like if it's an underwire um bikini obviously get your right cup size because that's going to help more than anything getting a smaller cup size is not gonna do you any favors um but if you're part of the small titty club and you want some like you want your titties look really good i've learned that going a size smaller than i would actually wear really helps so i feel like usually i get a small cut i get like a small triangle um top because you know i'm not like it's not like i'm not like an extra small like usually we're small um but i feel like the extra

small especially what she makes um which is one size down for me just do do the conversion based on yourself helps a lot i don't know why i feel like it might be the illusion of the smaller cup makes my titty look bigger but been loving her recently i'm absolutely gonna invest in more i also have like this incredible like cut out one piece oh i can't wait to wear it with like a flowy skirt oh my god it's incredible she's incredible go support the other day i posted my guac on my Instagram and everybody was asking me for my guac recipe um I I love growing up because you realize that you start liking more foods I hated avocado when I was younger don't know why maybe I just had like the wrong avocado once um but now I love avocado oh my god like I said if you want a fat

ass avocado is your best fucking friend quite honestly um and so I have been making a lot of guac I always make guac I love guac oh my god just like any opportunity to make it I'm making it so my go-to for guac is you're gonna take like four or five really ripe avocados like very soft I feel like you need them to be soft so you get that creaminess if they're like partially ripe they're still kind of like a little partically or chunky that's what happened with mine today it's just because they didn't let them set out enough um four or five avocados cut them up smash them up dice up a red onion um about half to a full one depends on how much onion you want i like a lot of onions so toss that bad boy in there serrano peppers are your best friend um i've

realized that the grocery store i've been going to doesn't really care spice carry spicy serrano peppers like i could bite into these serrano peppers the spicier ones are gonna have more like little brown veins on the outside i like them when they have a lot of them because i dice mine up real small and it's really nice to get a few of them in a bite um so i do like one or two of those depending on how spicy and how much you want how spicy you want it like a whole thing of cilantro um a couple limes in there make sure you also are not leaving the stems on your cilantro i feel like that's gross and it tastes gross and then after you pick off all the leaves it's very time consuming but after you pick off all the leaves um dice them up so they're real small

that's super helpful some fresh ground pepper some fresh garlic some fresh salt um and that's really about it mix it up i feel like that is the best guac you could ever possibly make and honestly best food ever can't lie this is a great question for my cancer babes and my romantic people this cancer season people were feeling the ultimate highs of love um but someone asked how to not be scared of getting attached when you're dating somebody and i felt this fleetingly very fleetingly because i realized you either experience the incredibleness of love the extreme high and the heartbreak or you experience the guarded version of it what you only allow for yourself you hold yourself back you experience love at a 25 level and you still

experience the heartbreak the meaning of this is heartbreak is unavoidable you're going to experience it no matter what um the question is are you going to allow yourself to feel that high high with that low or are you going to keep yourself guarded and only experience something of something and then also that low it is so much more worthwhile to fall head over heels in love and still experience heartbreak and have that moment with that person than it is to constantly be guarded against yourself against the world and against people who are trying to love you I found an incredible passage that I think really spoke to me, once again, on Tumblr. This is from Drunk When I Made This, but let me read it to you.

What is crazy is that if you stay guarded and careful, always, always, and always, you could spend 10 years with someone who just happens to love you enough and disrespect themselves enough to go along with that. But you will never reach the activity of love. When it ends, you might not even understand what you have lost because you never committed to going all in on their potential. There are people on this earth who may suck your soul off the dirt when you spill it. But if you're not open, they will get tired. If they respect themselves enough, even halfway. Meaning if they are aware of their needs at all.

Now I understand why time means less than intention. With intention, you can time travel. With intention, you never get tired. you just feel wins and wins and wins even struggle well communicated through is a win i feel like that is so important holding yourself back just holds other people back and you're not opening yourselves up to the possibility of just allowing yourself to be loved it's okay to be loved it's okay to be wanted it's okay to also want to be loved and want to be wanted pay attention to the partners you're having in your life are they going to provide that for you are they also

guarding themselves up are you going to fall susceptible for somebody who is placing a guard on themselves and refusing to love you fully you don't deserve that so why does somebody else deserve that as well stop holding yourself back you deserve love you know what i mean especially this cancer season it's incredible it's summer let's just open our hearts up and dive in if you experience heartbreak it's just a part of life and I think it's also a beautiful part of life it sucks it hurts but we're able to feel those extreme lows and we're also able to feel those extreme highs if we were just numb to it all then what's the point hi Hannah my name is Kat I'm 21 and I'm from Florida right now I'm in a relationship and it's the healthiest relationship

that I've ever been in but I have been in really toxic and manipulative situations before so I'm kind of finding myself struggling to remember that I'm worthy of the love that I receive from him and all of the positive ways that he makes me feel so I was just wondering if you have any tips or advice on how to remind myself that I am worthy and that there is good that can come from being vulnerable with somebody so thanks I can't wait to hear your advice and here's a bong rip ah i love it i'm about to load a little cbd bowl as well um so we can cheers that was a juicy bong rip i love it but if you struggle with showing yourself kindness and compassion because you

were like ashamed abused you know psychologically damaged whether it was childhood or you know relationships any relationships you may have built during your years you know growing um and you can't shake the feeling that there's something inherently bad about you and that you need to be punished for all the time consider that you've been punished enough even though there wasn't anything deserving of this much punishment to begin with even if there was you suffered enough when will enough be enough how many more years must you suffer it's time to start being gentle and kind with yourself and i feel like that really just starts with um sitting down and having conversations with yourself and reminding yourself that you are worthy of this love especially you're in a healthy

relationship you deserve this especially going through um bad things in the past so whenever you feel those feelings of, oh, you know, do I deserve this? Should this be happening? I think it's important to switch your mindset, be aware, cognitively aware when you're having these thoughts and try and switch your mindset to letting yourself be open to that feeling of love and feeling it fully and feeling that like tingling in your toes and that tingling in your scalp and that feeling that love really it has like a full body feeling I think it's very important to you know be open to feeling that as well as working with your partner on it I think connection is really important I think simply opening yourself and challenging yourself to be vulnerable in these

situations is also important because it usually pays off um I have been the most vulnerable I've ever been with my partner currently and I have never felt this more this much love in my entire life which is incredible and wonderful and very rewarding and so like physical intimacy used to be very hard for me um as well as like just like being naked and like being perceived by other people um so like something that I challenged myself to do was like we would just like hang out naked like I was like I need to get used to this I need to be comfortable with my body i need to be comfortable like around somebody i love with my body um and so like we would just spend days hanging this is so weird but like it it works you know give yourself little challenges

um this is just a personal experience but we would just spend days hanging out naked 24 7 like i'd get to his house and i would just take off all my clothes and we would just spend our time together like completely vulnerable and open with each other both physically and like mentally um and i feel like that was really incredible and really helped me work through some things once again everybody's issues are different whether it pertains to um you know mental intimacy or physical intimacy just give yourself small challenges that really force you to kind of you know open up and be willing to surrender yourself to love and then actually follow through and surrendering surrendering oh my god surrendering yourself to that love

because you know the oxytocin that feeling it'll flood through you that level flood through you and it'll reinforce that habit and you know that willingness to be open and be connected to love so i hope that helped i love you while i load this someone asked for credit card advice which i feel like is very valid but i'm not gonna lie to you guys i do not own a credit card like they said they were like credit card advice my adhd asked is too impulsive and that's the thing i don't think i could trust myself with a credit card and my parents knew they probably couldn't trust me with a credit card either so they just like had instilled it in my brain that i should never open a credit card never get one no matter what because they were afraid of the debt i was

gonna put myself in um that being said unfortunately you do need one in order to build credit rent also helps you build credit paying bills on time helps you build credit as well but if you need to build credit fast you know the best thing is a credit card unfortunately because you can also be you know impulsive on it i do not have a credit card i'm looking into the best credit card for me personally um depending on like you know they all have different quirks and they all have different aspects that you know are very personal and it's a very personal decision you make but if i am to get a credit card it's absolutely only going to be for credit building and something that i'm only going to put on it is like gas so like it's may or honestly maybe my like electricity bill or like

my wi-fi bill something that's under a hundred dollars um something that's a bill once a month i feel like gas sometimes just is way too expensive right now it's like 50 fucking dollars to fill up my car when it should be 25 you know what I mean like it should not be that much anyways um something that like best credit card tip I can really give you is put one bill on it something that's not big okay and pay it off like immediately like as soon as it's charged to your card pay it off there are also my brother has incredible credit like incredible credit and something that he definitely did and something that he swears by is he just went on like credit card or reddit threads and um they have like some deep dive information on there about each credit card about what's best

um and that's how he built his credit up really really well so i'm not the one to give you super great credit card advice simply because i don't have a credit card my best credit card advice would be don't take one out if you do have one and you have super high you know bills you got to pay on there or like you're in debt i say pay those off immediately if you can at least put some of your money towards it whether it's five dollars whether it's 50 whether it's 100 whatever you can make that your focus and then yeah i would say if you're gonna get a credit card use it for credit building tools i know there's also credit cards you can get for like small business stuff um i haven't really gotten into that yet i don't want to be like yeah i know a lot about credit cards

to give you guys bad advice but straight up my parents striked the fear of god into me when it came to credit cards because they knew my ass to be online shopping every night so i just put myself into my own debt you know i just like if i really like shop online it's like oh my god i'm pulling out a savings like fuck you know what i mean so it makes me think a little bit more than like hmm this is a endless amount of money that i could just dive into you know so protect yourself that being said, I have a bowl loaded. Let's hit this together. Let's cheers. It's been a while. Oh my God. Today I'm smoking out of my holographic little bubbler from, um, canna style love

and i'm smoking a mix between some flour i have and some cbd flour that i have from paz packs they have really gotten me fucking through this tea break it's been incredible and their flour is like i know dab carts like the easiest and i know like the pre-rolls are the easiest as well oh my god it's super cute to like take on walks with you to take out with you i need to purchase some more um but their flower has been my favorite for a long time now like i can't lie i love just like half and halving my bowls especially recently coming off a tea break like my tolerance dropped down super low um and i've been getting a lots of anxiety from weed lately i don't really know why i'm not sure what changed in my brain so mixing it half and half um supplementing a little bit

of cbd in there has been wonderful especially for my anxiety because it's like unnecessary anxiety you know when you smoke and you're like oh my god like why am i freaking out like there's no reason i should be feeling anxiety about literally like my breathing and my heartbeat and the idea of making eye contact but i am and like what's going on so cbd has been a lifesaver once again paz packs you can use code smoke sesh for 10 off your order that would be incredible you'd be supporting me i'd be supporting you and we'd be supporting a company that i love i've been working with them for years i will always say good things about them and like like do you hear any other like like work that i do with people like they didn't even pay for this i'm just telling you

guys but like i don't work with any other people especially like cbd companies or like delta a companies um because a lot of people put out shit quality products and I want to only like participate in quality companies and Paz Pax has once again like raised the bar like they raised the bar every single time they put out a new product like I know all the other CBD companies are competing with them and none of them can catch up like they're too good so highly recommend if you are interested in cbd go with past packs code smoke sash you can get 10 off i love that our topic is like love i love love we've been talking about love this whole time it's just the cancer season you know it really brings it out of us oh someone asked fav thing about the new apartment

and i can't lie oh my god it's my giant fucking windows like every wall is covered with giant windows i have a beautiful view i'm on the top floor i can see like my cityscape and like my street and i'm like up in the trees it's like incredible i don't even use like lighting like i use an occasional light or like lamp but these windows provide so much it's incredible and i have just been wanting natural light more than anything at my last place there was not a lot of natural light i had like two windows that's it but i'm literally staring at six windows right now and that's just my living room i have another window in my um kitchen but i pushed my fridge in front of it um so i had more space in my kitchen but other than that i it everything about the

apartment's pretty good also the like the flooring it's like like oh my god how am i trying it's hardwood floor but it's not new hardwood floor this is like a very old building they just refurbished it and i love that they kept the old hardwood floor they did put like vinyl hardwood in my kitchen and it looks kind of ugly i'm thinking about putting like um black and white tiles over it like the peel black and white tiles just so i can rip them out when i'm done um just for like aesthetic purposes because the like hardwoods don't match like the deep mahogany brown red of like the natural wood does not match the like gray of the fake wood that they laid down so that's my only complaint that's a very easy fix other than that yeah these windows my plants are

loving it and when i move my cat in he's gonna be so happy someone asked what are some easy um good semi-healthy foods to make depression's a bitch and it's so hard to bring myself to make meals let alone healthy ones um especially when you're in depression i think feeding yourself is just key number one and yeah i get it cooking is really hard for yourself if that's not the move that's okay it's okay to eat out you know there's nothing wrong in that do what's best for you but if you are craving like meals I think the key is not health the key is what is easiest for you what do you like and what can you make over and over again because I people call them they're like hyper fixate foods you know those hyper fixated meals that you always make and you'll

make them on like months on end um and I think those are really good I think they're special it's awesome that you know you can eat one type of food over and over again and still love it every single time for me personally it's always breakfast food i don't know why i am just such a breakfast slut and eggs are so easy to cook um for a while it was like roasted potatoes um throw some peppers in there throw some onions in there with eggs on top and hot sauce and cheese even some spinach is really easy um the the basic like potato egg combo is really easy to just throw any vegetable in there like i had some uh peppers in my fridge that were just like going bad so i was like yeah i'm just gonna dice them up and throw them in my breakfast burrito for today

i made a breakfast burrito like i said you know you can switch it up i made guac on the side so i can have some chips and guac and also put guac on my burrito um egg sandwiches bagel sandwiches if you're craving something sweet even like french toast and like a berry compote is very easy like bitch you can get the the plain french toast you know from the freezer that's fine um or you can just it's very easy take a piece of bread soak it in eggs throw a little vanilla and cinnamon in that bitch throw it in a pan and shot like any kind of compote with fruit is easy it's just throw your uh fruit into a pot and then like maybe a tablespoon of sugar mix it up perfect my go-to always is like pancakes and peanut butter i don't know why that's great for protein

um pancakes peanut butter you can throw some banana on top even some sort of syrup but yeah i'm always just drawn to breakfast food but once again the key especially when you're depressed and it's hard to like you know find meals and like even cook for yourself is just find that one thing that sweet spot that you really enjoy um that does bring you joy that you can you know get through cooking that you can spice up a little bit and identify that and go from there um but you really just have to start and see what you like from there for me personally though like i said breakfast slut till the end someone asked me if i'm going to any protests and yes i am um unfortunately in my state as soon as the law was passed a trigger law went into effect where

all abortions were banned and it's a class b felony up to 15 years even if you seek it out of state luckily my neighboring state of kansas is a um they didn't have a trigger law go into place but it is being voted on august 2nd um so if you're a resident of kansas get registered asap and vote no august 2nd make sure you get out because all those old fucks like i said they are getting out and doing their part in voting unfortunately they're just voting for like the other fucking side like the republicans are very very good about voting so don't let them out vote your rights literally like i know it fucking sucks that you have to go do that but you you got to do your part and i can't vote in kansas i'm not a kansas resident anymore

unfortunately or else i'd be out there but i am out there fighting for you and fighting for your rights i was just at a protest the other day me my mom went to one um she's friends with like the democratic kansas state reps so we were out there with them i was talking to them they're very passionate i love that they're on the street with signs i think that's very incredible um but yeah i just went with my mom to a protest the other day and then i think i'm going to one july 3rd on the plaza um i don't know if it's july 3rd or 4th might be both i might go to both honestly and my sign said um pro-life fuck you because at this point like the pro-life people are not pro-life they're anti-choice they're anti-women they're anti um freedom quite honestly um people are like

well you can be pro-choice and pro-life it's like no at this point pro-life has been so fucking skewed to the point that they just want to control people's bodies and it's like christian fascism which is terrifying um you can be pro-choice and you can still want to keep your own baby but you are pro-choice you know you want other women to have that choice if you are pro-life straight up you do not care about other people so when i say that like i mean that full-heartedly if you are pro-life fuck you because i have so many friends who are pro-choice and they are absolutely like i have friends who have had children and they're still pro-choice you know have gotten pregnant um chose not to have an abortion and are still pro-choice it is not a

matter of you are pro-life you do not want babies to die i feel like that is a marketing tactic to get women who you know do want to keep their babies don't want abortions for them personally to convert them when in reality that is not the that's not the right fight you know you can fight for yourself and also other women at the same time so i'll be out there um if you see me feel free to say hi but yeah i am trying to do my part as best as i can um and what's interesting is i went to the rally in kansas and there was a lot of people there i was like at first there's only 15 people and then like hundreds and hundreds started showing up and we were standing on row avenue which was really cool but the only people everybody was honking and driving by and waving

and it was a majority like of the people um um it was morty i'm sorry i just got a text so i got distracted it was a majority of good feedback especially from women but the only people who flipped us off or who like gave us thumbs down or like yelled at us were men and they were old men no women did that to us no older women did that to us no seemingly republican women did that to us it was only old men and it wasn't a lot of them but it was shocking to me well not shocking it just obviously very obvious but it was just like okay this is like a fight against women heard so if you can find rallies in your area go to them protect yourself don't take pictures of other people people often go to rallies and they're like taking videos of people or like

of other people and it's like you need to keep other people safe as much as you are keeping yourself safe in Kansas City the police force is very very aggressive and quite honestly horrible and awful um in Kansas no police showed up in Missouri where the other protests are going on I'm assuming a lot of police are going to show up and if it gets crazy like you need to protect yourself don't wear contacts wear goggles if you can wear a mask if it's heavily populated if it's a small gathering i understand you're outside you're keeping your distance um even wearing a mask just to cover your face and your identity protect other people's identity there's no reason you should be posting photos of people at a rally who have not consented especially when it could

get them like criminalized in any sort of way or used against them in court later on if they do have an abortion um it's just important to protect yourself and yeah get out there and fight for what you believe in um someone asked sex tips fave positions i have such a low sex drive maybe due to meds but i love my partner um valid i feel like a lot of psych meds do interfere with um you know getting there and i understand that but sex is not a race i like to say it is a um uh what's a good it's a marathon you're not sprinting through it okay it should be like something you work up to which is something that i've really had to realize as a woman i need i need that like emotional connection um for men you can tell me i'm wrong no idea i'm assuming

you know it's just like cool you know i take my fucking pants off get in there come done under five minutes for women or for me personally i should say i don't want to group people in there but i do need the emotional connection straight up in order in order to like come like straight up um and i had to realize you have to build like this intimacy before sex before the clothes even come off um to kind of heighten things um so like teasing is fun flirting sending fun pictures during like say if you're not together sending fun texts um you know hinting at things um working your way up to it slowly is very important to build that kind of you know pressure not pressure in a bad way but like pressure in a good way like we're very excited we're getting there you know

and that happens before the clothes even come off okay when the clothes come off which you can do touching feeling whatever over clothes very fun um but when the clothes come off you know if you're heat in the moment you know jump right into sex that's awesome it's wonderful but also don't be afraid to like not put anything in you right away okay take time to explore take time to um you know show like individual attention um i personally love 69 love that position incredible um it's great even beforehand working your way up um to like actually getting into sex um it's great for like also if you don't want all that pressure of like attention and focus which i think is kind of the the main point of like oral like you know it you're being praised in a sort of sense and that

has its own aspects but if you are afraid of that or like you don't like focusing on yourself too much it's really easy to you know 69 have fun not have that focus on yourself because you're putting in work as well um love oral love oral from any position quite honestly um love getting my ass ate great incredible love eating ass do it all you know um but like i said just like work your way up slowly i feel like it builds a really incredible connection it builds a really incredible intimacy and then also if you're the kind of person who like has sex and during sex you like um like you have your adhd brain and like you kind of like thoughts are going everywhere or if you have anxiety and you're like thinking kind of negative thoughts about

yourself about your like things happening or like you overthink it's very important to also talk during sex okay very important and even before consent constant consent constant communication that is an emphasis on consent is very important so then your mind doesn't wander you're not questioning yourself you're not questioning like oh my god what is he thinking about like is he thinking this ask him okay does this feel good can i do this i love it when you do this can you do more of this it's okay to talk to your partner um it's okay to get a little crazy with it as well you know what i mean like you can get a little freak nasty it's fun to say that shit during sex but keep communicating i feel like when i feel a disconnect it's because i'm not

communicating it's because i'm not like interacting with my partner um sex is way more than just like p and v it is everything before it is everything during and it is everything after as well you need that aftercare you need to spend time together um do some cuddling do some massaging you know thank each other compliment each other all very important things that go into sex i just got the kamasutra and there were some crazy positions in there this this guy was holding her up and eating her pussy like it was 69 but he was standing up it's like her legs were wrapped around his neck and like but like standing up i was like oh my god insane i feel like it'd be i'd be afraid of like falling on my head so like i wouldn't be able to like pay attention but like i was like

that's insane there's also like a bunch of three-way stuff in there haven't really had a three-way so can't really tell you but um yeah i that's kind of the best sex tips i can really give you is take your time um oh and when it comes to positions i found that it's very important to pay attention to your body especially as a woman i didn't realize that your cervix moves positions in your body until i was having sex and i was like why am i doing doggy and why does this really really hurt right now because he's slamming into my cervix because it's positioned differently and yeah that shit's gonna hurt pay attention to your body if a position hurts it's okay to switch positions communicate to your partner be like actually i want you to hit it from the back

now or actually i want to ride you now you know it's okay to conversate and talk about it um i also had a dm that was like i'm afraid or my boyfriend doesn't like it when i use toys that's weird i don't think men should see toys as a competition um i think you know it's a great way to you know like check off all um necessities because like not all women can come from just p and v you know what i mean like sometimes it just goes in you're like okay whatever like i need some more stimulation if you're that girly sex toys are great you know get some clitoral simulation on top of the penetration um and i don't think men should really see that as a competition i think that's kind of odd and i think she was also long distance like babe use your toys have fun

okay i think the best way to kind of ease guys into it who are like uh what's going on i've never seen a sex toy in my life is to simply like show him like and it's like kind of weird at first but it's hot you know he'll probably find it hot is to be like this is how i like it this is how i like to be touched um and then like can you use it on me you know build up that intimacy build up that like experience with your partner super fun um if you're just like fucking in the middle like hand it to him i understand he could be thrown off but also like maybe he's down try it out um someone else asked about anal which i love but there's a lot of prep you have to do i haven't done anal in a while i've been meaning to but first of all key number one like you have to be

careful okay especially back there there's a lot that can go wrong all right um make sure it's a good bowel movement day okay make sure it's a healthy bowel movement make sure your bowels are empty okay make sure that it's just solid okay very important to pay attention to your body like i said like every aspect okay so make sure your bowel movement is good you're clean you're it's it's out of you you know um and then also work your way uh like there's no way you can just like straight up go from never having done anal to fitting a whole entire dick inside your asshole like to be frank to be honest um that's a lot that is a lot it is going to hurt and i feel like that's what a lot of women try and they have a lot of trauma from because they get pressured into it

for men because i feel like a lot of men ask for it um and it's not really the women's idea um don't feel pressured into it if there's anything you're feeling pressured into say no i don't want to do this right now and if they don't respect that that is a big red flag that is a key characteristic you need to think about that and maybe leave that person but if you're like okay cool absolutely you know give you some space oh my god keeper wonderful and that's like the bare minimum quite honestly but but communicate there's no reason you should feel pressured into it especially anal anal should not be pressured into okay i feel like the woman you do need to be very interested in um but quite honestly some of the best orgasms my life have come from anal

which is very interesting very interesting but to work your way up to it you have to stretch yourself out um get a plug get something that's great another great toy vibrating plug get one those have your partner use it on you and then also it feels incredible because like between your asshole and your pussy there's like a thin wall like inside of you so when it's vibrating your partner will also be able to feel that on the underside of them while they're fucking you great for both people like it's a win-win situation also helps stretch you out a little bit so then you can fit something bigger into you um there's great toys you can find them at your local sex shops I really really recommend you supporting your local shops rather than like

buying online um like around Kansas City the local shop is like Cirilla's I love them I it's like of course I'm gonna go in there and support you guys rather than just like Adam and Eve like what they probably just buy their shit from like AliExpress and resell it so I would rather go into a local sex shop where I can talk to a wonderful kind worker who knows a lot and can help walk me through it and find good things to use um never be afraid to ask them they know more than use you i can guarantee it um once again 18 plus but yeah stretch yourself out and then also use lube i don't mean spit okay i mean lube my favorite baby oil if you're using a condom don't use baby oil because i think it will just break it down you need to use lube lube

but um i'm with a long-term partner we don't really use condoms that's fine um personal decisions are very personal you need to make them yourself if i do recommend condoms of course but baby oil is my favorite i also love literally like if you want to get a little bit messy if it's like wash today and you got to change your sheets later um baby oil your whole body up and his whole body up as well so like everything is just slippery super fun very like sensual yes great word anyways baby oil you need a lot of lube you do because your asshole's gonna be dry and that shit's gonna hurt okay if it's dry if it's dry if you have lube it shouldn't hurt and work your way slowly talk to him and also like if you can uh like reach my favorite position don't do doggy

oh my god don't do doggy that's a lot my favorite position for anal is kim k where you're laying flat on your stomach you have a pillow under your head your legs are pressed together and he's behind you that is the best or like where you're just like laying on your side and like he's behind you like just laying down incredible but you should not be in a position where you're like clenching your stomach muscles or where you're squeezing your body together in a way that's going to be hard to fit something inside of it you want those muscles down there to be loose you want to be comfortable um and yeah the kim k position is the best where you're just laying down flat on your stomach legs together and if you can like reach behind you and grab his dick

and then like you put it inside of you instead of him having the power because sometimes men can get excited and just like you know want to shove it all in there that's not gonna work you know you got to work yourself into it but after you know you you work yourself into it you stretch yourself out a little bit that's when the fun comes in also at any point in time during sex it's okay to say no it's okay to say i'm not feeling it i'm not in a good headspace it's i don't want to do this i've been there multiple times i've been in times where it's like i'm not having a good body day and i'm overthinking my body and something's not like i'm in a position where that body part is emphasized and i just have to be like no stop i i just need a break that's okay that is valid

that is very important it helps build up the relationship with yourself because now you can trust yourself um and it's okay if there's times you haven't spoken up just learn and um speak up for yourself in the future and once again if they are like weird about it afterwards like of course be like i'm just having a weird day i'm not in the right headspace i don't want to do this right now and if they're like weird about that and they just start giving you shit no red flag get that person out of your life quite honestly um i think that's valid for anybody to say or do and you should never take that personally um you never know where people are in their headspace you never know um what's going on like i said that's why communication is very important and you should

be communicating during sex the whole time um if you can but yeah that is like all the sex tips i can really fucking throw at you all at once i know that was really hectic but i got a lot this time so i wanted to cover a lot also once again i that was geared mostly towards like um heterosexual couples p and v i've never really experienced like um like i've never been with a woman and i've been in a three-way so i'm not like speaking on those kinds of experience um so keep that in mind but i feel like it's all very important information that you can pretty much you know translate to any couple and last but not least i want to talk about being a burden um i feel like a lot of people have this idea or this shame that you know they shouldn't

be a burden or that they shouldn't have any burdens within their life and i saw a really interesting tumblr post that i think um really encapsulates it encapsulates it well but we're in this like new wave of like egocentric spirituality and like this spiritual selfishness that I think is really toxic and I think like yes the ego is good yes you should choose yourself yes you should show up for yourself yes you should have a little bit of ego it's very important to you know have that in your life to think that you have importance that you hold importance and that you have you can hold space okay very important ideology I know that you should get rid of the ego i think that is not healthy at all um an over-consuming sense of self is just as detrimental

as an under-consuming sense of self and losing all sense of identity and self there is a sweet spot somewhere in the middle that i think we're all trying to find but you know you can't push super far to one side or super far to the other and i feel like people have been pushing super far to the selfishness side it's kind of sad to see i get a lot of questions like how do i leave these people how do i you know cut these people out of my life how do i only rely on myself how do i and it's like pause pause pause pause i think we should be a burden to each other and she put this best she said and yes this includes a certain degree of tolerance for emotional burden all else being equal my love for you and loyalty you loyalty to you is not dependent on how easy you make it

for me to love you i don't value you for how little trouble you cause me i want to learn how to take how to take you for who you are instead of who i want you to be or who i think you should be and i feel like that is a very hard concept for some people to grasp because they put a lot of emphasis on who they think other people should be and hold them at these super high um like levels that they just simply can't achieve um in order to like kind of remove people from their life like you cannot hold people at these levels that humans simply cannot live up to you know what i mean that's not fair for anybody involved and i feel like a lot of people are doing that now it's okay to you know get in fights it's okay to have some stress in your life it's okay to

miscommunicate with each other it's okay for you yourself to miscommunicate with somebody else it's okay for you yourself to you know ask for some emotional help every once in a while from your friends that is what your friends are there to do now are they there to be your therapist full time no you have to understand where the line is sometimes crossed you have to set boundaries you have to communicate but this idea that we can't be like ourselves with people or they're just going to cut us off because we become too much for them is so strange relationships that are like the best kind of relationships are relationships that work themselves out that aren't afraid of the messiness that aren't afraid of the miscommunication because they know at the end

of the day they're going to show up and love each other for who they are and they're going to show up and they're going to talk it out and they're going to figure it out those are the best relationships not the relationships who face the first kind of you know rock in the road and they give up on each other that's crazy it's okay to need other people it's okay to need a community it's okay for like you to want other people to show up for you and i feel like people are kind of missing that point especially now more than ever um of course the ego is important but don't let the ego consume you to a point that you are refusing to make connections with other humans the biggest gift that we have in this life is that we can make connection and we can find peace

through each other and we can you know feel a little less lonely by hearing each other's experiences and stories and trusting each other to show up but if we're hiding parts of ourselves and we're not showing up fully for each other how are we ever going to be able to do that and i think that was a really big eye-opening moment like of course i get on here i preach like self love you know self um appreciation um showing up for yourself in every aspect but we've gotten into this idea of this like cut off culture that if it's not serving us to get rid of it but listen not everything good in your life is going to serve you and it's not going to serve you right away you got to find the people in your life who are meant to be there who challenge you who bring

new ideas to you and who show up for you and you in turn need to show up for them it cannot be a one-sided relationship you have to put yourself out there you have to be there for people and hope that it returns to you now of course you know if things aren't good for you if it's getting toxic if it's just not working of course move on choose what is best for you but i don't want people to be afraid of conflict and especially be afraid of working it out don't give up okay the same way you wouldn't give up on yourself try not giving up on other people but also to yin there's yang and you have to judge each situation by what is best i just thought that was a really eye-opening little piece of writing and i wanted to share i'm sure it could help a lot of you out

in whatever situation you're in. Hannah and all of Smoke Sash, I'm hoping you have some input on this or anyone also feels this way, but I found recently I've had to separate myself from astrology a little. I like to use it as a tool for insight on myself, but I feel like it got a little toxic lately. I feel like I'm reading these collective messages and I'm just waiting for something in my life to change and it's not necessarily happening probably because I'm just waiting for the stars to align. But I'm also met with a big disappointment when nothing changes. You know, just saying, oh, you know, this season expect to be met with so much love and so much change and you'll probably be moving out, anything of that sort. And you're just met with this huge disappointment and I just

how to distance myself so i can take control of my own life so just wanted your input on that i think this is very interesting and i think it's a good call out if any of you guys find yourself in this situation um i do think a lot of the popular astrologers astrology messages that you do see um are meant to be attention grabbers you know you're getting them from social media they're meant to get likes and shares unfortunately are those people interested in astrology and are they putting things out that are pertaining to astrology yes i do think so um but are they also meant to get likes and shares yes and if you if you say it in a way that's like you know you're divinely in tune these things are going to show up for you you're going to get way more traffic way

more energy than if you're like hey these good things are going to come if you put in the work you know and i think they are call to actions they just don't necessarily state that they are um like you said you know you were getting messages that were like oh you're gonna move out or oh money's gonna come to you or um good things are gonna happen so you're like great love that positive vibes i get to sit back and hang but what they're not saying is uh these good things are going to happen money's going to come to you this is going to happen blah blah if you put in the work if you want it and that comes with spirituality with mindfulness with any sort of astrology as well these good things will happen i do speak in a very positive sense i do speak in

a very like change oriented sense like all these good things will happen but i'm not saying it's easy and i'm never saying it's going to come to you one day in your sleep i'm never saying it's going to walk up to your front door and knock and be there that's just simply never going to happen unfortunately but what i am saying is these things will happen if you put your mind towards it and if you get out there and you use these call to actions as like a push okay as like a uh okay i'm going to get out the door and i'm going to go search for it kind of way um and i feel you i've gotten in that way too where it's like i've just become complicit in my life because i'm like oh well this will happen and then it never does because i never get up and i never make a change

or oh i really want this to happen and i just sit around it's like you really do have to take control of your life and take control of the aspects of your life that you can in order to see those changes so i'm proud of you i'm proud of you for realizing that i'm proud of you for taking the next step okay maybe distancing yourself a little bit and yeah if any of you guys find yourself in those situations where you're like um this is making me way too complicit in my life and is not really pushing me or driving me i think it's okay to switch up the media you consume or step away for a little bit until you can have a different view on it but yeah i do agree with you a lot of the popular astrologers that i see and like the tarot readers on tiktok

and the um like uh um the twitter astrologers a lot of it is like um they're not very call to action-y they're more like positive affirmation-y does that make sense um and unless you try and view it in a call to action way and take that as inspiration and run with it and try to do something with it then yeah you know it does make you a little complicit within your life and makes you maybe not want to reach out in ways and be as hungry in certain ways but very interesting very eye-opening i unfortunately have to go get ready for work um next week we're gonna have another great episode please please please any dms that you have submit them to my instagram at hannah marlene um i want to talk about like um the divine i want to read i want to get into

this book on women's rituals and kind of talk about that with you so if you guys have any questions literally anything at all we went through a lot today and i'm talking anything submit them to my instagram at hannah marlene and i really hope you all have a wonderful fucking day an incredible wednesday or thursday or friday or saturday sunday or monday tuesday whatever you're listening to this on um and you know what let's let's have one more bowl one's more celebratory bowl um someone asked for my favorites and i only have one answer for my favorites this week and that is the um blood orange san pellegrino it's all i can think about it's taking up every waking moment of my head space like i love it that and my vibrator it's

been a vibe this week literally wow okay anyways let's hit this and cheers cheers the new moon cheers to you cheers to the rest of your week please have a safe weekend and i will see you next week love you all