Smoke Sesh - shroom 101, Euphoria, & staying productive

Episode Date: January 13, 2022

One podcast this week! So sorry, I’ll catch you guys up on the podcast, we also go over first time shrooms, shroom 101, euphoria, weed moderation, staying productive, sex, libido, standing up for yourself, and looking forward to the future. Thank you for listening to smoke sesh I’ll be back Tuesday!

Listen, everybody needs a fairy godmother, you know, someone to look out for them. Some people call me their internet big sister, others their fairy smoke mother. You can call me Hannah, the new host of Smoke Sash. So come hang out, let's light up and talk everything there is to life. Some good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing. I've got a story for it all. Hello everybody, welcome to the podcast. We're only going to have one this week.

I know. If you're a little confused, let me update you. So literally, I was so goddamn hungover yesterday. So hungover. I went out drinking for just a little bit after work. I just am such a fucking lightweight. Like, I need a whole bowl of pasta in my system, like heavy on the carbs, if I want to keep up with people who can drink.

Because I'm like a one drink, one shot girly. and i am already like oh i'm a little buzzed you know what i mean for like every three shots people take i need to take one i am a lightweight when it comes to smoking not so much i can hold my own i can do my thing um but drinking yeah i woke up the next morning so fucking hungover so i woke up tuesday literally belligerently hungover i just laid in bed all day and recorded a podcast which i thought uploaded i thought i uploaded that one um and usually when i upload it like the the segments kind of disappear so people ask me how i started my podcast i use this app called anchor really easy for distribution really easy for recording um the they use the microphone that's

in your uh in your fucking phone already so you don't really have to have a microphone super easy 10 out of 10 recommend um but I don't know where my fucking podcast went because I went to upload it and it did not upload on Spotify and I'm not smart enough to name segments so I can refine them again in my files I just give them random titles and now I have no idea where they are so we're just gonna we're gonna do one massive podcast we're just gonna do one long one where I know instead of like two 50-minute ones, I think I'm going to do an hour and a half one. We're going to go do some speed round questions. We're going to do some longer questions.

I had you guys send me some long paragraphs that we need to deep dive into and some quick questions that I can answer in like 30 seconds. So I'm very excited to get into it. I have so many questions I literally didn't even answer from yesterday's podcast that I need to still get to. So we have plenty of content, plenty of time to get into it. Thank you for being here today. um if you are one of the people who are like i wait on my hands and knees every tuesday and

thursday for you to upload that podcast literally like i'm waiting that's fine love the energy me too girly i'm the same way um if you follow my instagram at hannah marlene or the podcast instagram at smokes as shawty i always update you guys on what's going on in my life what's going on in the podcast when you can expect things up when things have actually posted on spotify so you don't have to sit around and worry and wait you know what i mean but if you're the kind of person i also get dms some dms are like oh my god i cannot wait every tuesday and thursday and some of them are like i save your podcast for when i'm like cleaning when i'm like doing self-care stuff so it doesn't really matter when i post as long as it's like there eventually so they can

listen to it then you i don't know the updates you might not care about the updates as much but if you do care about knowing about like oh why isn't there a podcast on Tuesday oh it didn't fucking upload and Hannah was hungover heard I'll wait till Thursday you know what I mean updates are always on Instagram that's just the easiest way for me to reach you guys tbh but yeah that's what fucking happened on Tuesday I'm so sorry about that you guys but we're gonna get into it we're gonna make it a good episode I cannot wait literally so many good questions to go through let's dive in okay first of all we gotta talk euphoria because that first episode oh my god oh my god what was that that was insanity um spoiler alert if you guys have not

watched it go watch it and skip like five to ten minutes of this podcast because i'm gonna talk about it and my opinions because a surprising amount of people were like girl give us your opinions on euphoria um so when euphoria first came out i was tbh kind of afraid to watch it because i was like when skins when i discovered skins at like 14 13 um yeah i watched that and i entered just like a deep deep dark like hole and just like the way they romanticize mental illness like i just dug myself into a little pit and it took me five years to climb out of it so when euphoria came out i saw some flashbacks of what i had been through and i was like not gonna watch that um then the pandemic hit and i was bored and i finally

watched it and people were like oh it's really like having full-on arguments on tiktok once again why i avoid tiktok i was on there for 14 minutes and it was just people arguing with each other about if it was relatable or not or like if it was like really a true high school experience bitch i don't give a fuck that shit is so entertaining it is so entertaining the outfits the drama the character development the monologues the way they shoot the scenes the colors the aesthetics it's incredible like it's a good show all around 10 out of 10 i was re-watching skins the other day no it's nowhere close to this this is just artistically very pleasant on the eye and i think um i don't know if they're necessarily romanticizing it we'll see within the next um

season i think a lot of characters are probably going to be like although i think there were some things that were romanticized in the first season i think they're gonna come back to bite them in the ass the second season and kind of like see the true colors like Kat's backstory I have a feeling like with all the stuff she did online and like her second life I feel like she might freak out a little bit about that because who plays her Barbie Fiera is that how she used to say her name I know it's her but she did a like collage little trailer thing on her Instagram and it was literally just her character like having a panic attack the whole entire season so I was like hmm t i i wonder if that's gonna happen also fez's grandmother obsessed miss donatella

versace incredible it's not donna oh my god donatella versace it's actually a very legendary like mob actress she's been in like sopranos i don't know like a bunch of mob movies so the fact that she got to play this badass drug dealing bitch grandmother in this new season obsessed the way she walked right into that fucking strip club and shot that man in those in his legs in his legs while wearing a matching two-piece cowboy set that says god's will god's way obsessed that was mind-blowing anyways um fez he was really sitting over there doing bare a minimum on the couch and lexi was eating it up she was like giggling and like rolling to the side they were sitting so close to i ship it i

love it i'm so obsessed with that she's like the goody girl i'm i i hope he doesn't get her in any trouble but like i like the innocence i like the fun also what else oh holy shit i'm skipping so many parts but literally the way Maddie was two fist banging she just the way that she is like a girly girl but also like scary at the same time two fists on that door slamming her hands into it Cassie is like crying like oh I cannot believe they fucked I cannot believe it I cannot believe it you cannot justify those actions those are just bad actions I cannot believe that happened um but yeah obviously I think they're gonna find out I love Maddie I'm obsessed with her she's a bad bitch for that guy was like can I kiss you and she was like no he was like why she was like

you were the corniest man I ever met I was like keeping it real I love that because he kind of was a little corny um just so funny and then Cassie like finally manages to leave the bathroom and Maddie like runs up to her and hugs her I was like oh tea drama Jules and Rue are gonna become friends again for sure if not what lovers but that was a whole mess the first time and I do not think it's probably gonna be any better the second time and also Dominic Fike I don't know that man's real name or the name of the show i don't but it's the man in the washing room with rue he's gonna be bad for her they're gonna be bad together because literally that girl was having going into cardiac arrest and he was like oh i need to count your heartbeat perfect let me do

that for you knew how to count a heartbeat perfectly like knew what was going on of course worried but it seemed like he had way too much experience there in that department and i think they are going to be chaos together which could be also a very interesting to watch um love the way faz took off his palace sweater before beating the shit out of nate like a true gentleman he said no i cannot get blood on my palace sweater let me remove it first and then i'll get it again it's so funny that was the best ending ever so happy nate got the shit beat out of him very much so necessary um and yeah i don't know i'm excited to see what comes this the first season was fucking crazy i could not predict anything so i'm sure the second season is going

to be very similar it seems more dramatic there was like more crying in the trailer i was like oh my god okay the drama i'm so ready okay me and my co-worker were talking about this we'll dive into it because we're talking about euphoria and drugs um she was asking me she's talking about microdosing she's like i really want to microdose i feel like mushrooms i feel like it has um very good properties for depression especially if you take it at a small dosage and i was like and she was like i think you know a lot about it and i was like you're right i don't know why i haven't answered this on the podcast so i should probably do a deep dive because i got some questions and they were like i'm doing streams for the first time what should i expect what should i do

okay so i have done i've done a lot of streams like a lot like i went through a nine month period where i did them at least every three days um and when i mean trip every three days i'm not talking microdose where you're supposed to take like 0.2 like when you're microdosing you're supposed to take a very small small small small amount okay 0.2 0.3 like not a lot under one probably under 0.5 because you still want to be able to function and go through your day and not be tripping because you will take these this or take that amount like every two to three days all right and then you'll give yourself like a little break after a while um that is what traditional microdosing is do i agree with that um although i do think it has great properties

i personally don't know if it would be great for my brain um i personally and like that's fine it's totally up to you um taking a small amount of mushrooms every two to three days just like I don't think is the best option for me I think you're still gonna be like tripping a little bit you're still gonna have that like be in that trip mindset which when I am in that mindset I like to give myself space and not have like obligations and be just hanging instead of like going through my normal day um so personally I just genuinely think it is very very beneficial to trip two to three times a year and that's it she was like i'm looking for introspection i'm looking for like a new mindset i'm looking to just have some fun that's great i think mushrooms are great

and perfect for that they make you see things differently they make you connect to things differently they make you kind of it opens up your eyes to a different side of the world and one that's definitely more positive um so with that i personally think a trip a good trip a good 2.5 grams a good 2 grams a good 3 grams whatever you're comfortable with um every two to three times a year is very very healthy now when I was tripping that much every three days that is not healthy that was probably an escape tool I was it was during the pandemic so whatever I'll give myself a pass we were all going through it um but just like a normal amount of mushrooms a couple times a year give yourself a couple good trips really make sure that these trips are going to

be beneficial for you you know you're in a good space you're connecting in certain ways that you really want to connect maybe get some fun lights get some journals have some people over you know what i mean make sure that it's going to be beneficial though in some sort of way and you're opening up space for you to feel comfortable and safe as long as you do that you will be perfectly fine okay mushrooms are very mild personally in my opinion not a lot of visuals um I always love to have fun lights fun posters um that will make the visuals a little bit more stronger if you prefer that if you don't like visuals don't worry the only thing you're really gonna see is like the walls kind of breathe um they kind of just like push inward and outward very odd and like

psychologically um so chemically what mushrooms do and kind of why people see it as a cure for depression or not a cure but as a aid perhaps is because psilocybin shares some similarities with serotonin which if you don't know what serotonin is it's a chemical messenger that plays an important part in mood regulation especially for depression so low or imbalanced levels of serotonin can lead to anxiety and depression but mushrooms kind of act as like a fake serotonin in a way um and it replaces those like empty i'm trying to explain it um but it replaces what would be empty and not have serotonin with like a fake serotonin okay so when people are like oh i came out of this trip feeling so much better so much insight

that is why um it is like refilling those serotonin and it's not flooding your system um like with molly it just completely releases all of your serotonin so the next day you feel like shit because you have no serotonin in your system while mushrooms it's just going to fill the void um and then once you're done with mushrooms the void will just still be there you won't have like a deeper darker void does that make sense um so chemically like of course there's going to be properties that are going to make you feel better feel less depressed help your depression um now self-diagnosing self-medicating that is completely up to you um if you feel comfortable doing this great love it if you don't great love it you should never

feel pressure to do drugs you'd never feel pressure to um take anything that you don't feel comfortable taking um but for people who are tripping some trip rules if you're tripping for the first time um personally microdosing i don't think uh i just personally have never tried it long term so i can't be one to speak on it if you have microdosed long term let me know what it's like but after tripping so many times in a row i kind of feel like it might make your brain a little mushy personally um if you i feel like just microdosing long term just can make your brain mushy i'm not the one to speak on that i have really no idea i don't know shrooms are like your shrooms are going to be laced your shrooms aren't going to be you know they're usually from

a good background i don't know they're not like it's hard to lay shrooms like if you're taking pills you were taking like molly's coke anything like that you need to be very careful you need get that shit tested but if it's natural if it's like um like mushrooms like whole mushrooms don't buy ground-up ones buy the literal whole mushrooms you'll be chilling um should be safe all the strains relatively act in similar ways similar properties so i say like a good first trip two to three grams depending on what you're comfortable with you could even do i've had great trips on 1.5 i had great trips on one it is totally up to you and your comfort zone i think um there's like not a huge difference between one gram and two grams though it's just if you

want it a little bit stronger a little bit more heightened awareness emotions visualizations the more you probably want to take now here's the thing i've taken upwards of 10 grams before so you don't want to do that you do not want too many because then it becomes unfun it becomes unproductive it becomes literally like i i me and my boyfriend made a tea out of these 10 grams of you were going to split them but then we made a tea which when you make a tea there's many different ways to consume mushrooms but when you make a tea um you add lemon to it and you steep the mushrooms, and it actually, like, heightens the dosage, so at that point, I was assuming that I was taking about 10 grams, um, of mushrooms individually, um, and yeah,

it was just a five-hour trip of us just sitting on the floor, and my brain, like, could, I could not think, I could not do anything, I was just, like, paralyzed, so less is more, literally less is more you do not need to do that to your brain um there's many different ways to consume it uh personally i love getting a pizza throwing that bitch on top of some pizza it tastes like pepperonis you will not taste it mushrooms taste really really bad though so also you're giving yourself food poisoning so you have to time when you're eating them and when the last meal you ate was you want it to be semi-digested so the if you're gonna eat before tripping make sure it's at least two hours before do not eat right before tripping because when you eat the mushrooms you're

giving yourself food poisoning and you will become very very nauseous if you have a lot of food that still needs to digest in your system now if you eat the mushrooms on food you should be okay just as long as there's not like a big meal sitting in your tummy um you'll feel better okay just just just eat earlier okay prepare your body and then when you do take them i've done orange juice and champagne and mushrooms before i've done mushrooms on pizza i've done mushrooms on toast and peanut butter i've done just eating a bunch of mushrooms if you just eat them raw that's perfectly fine too they don't taste super fantastic but anything tastes better than molly tbh so i'm sure you can power through um you just eat them down give yourself a good 30 minutes and

you'll be tripping make sure you have like good people around you if you are gonna have people around you um people who aren't gonna fuck with you who it's gonna be positive vibes you really trust the people around you um if you don't want to trip with people like you don't want to both be tripping i don't know because you're afraid they're gonna freak you out or something um i still think it's great to have a trip sitter with you a good friend a sibling a roommate whatever who's just gonna hang out with you and be sober just in case you do need somebody else to kind of be a voice of reason um need to go anywhere need to you know do whatever a trip sitter is always a fantastic idea but yeah i don't know some of the best trips i've had like we just

put blankets all over the floor and set up like a little table on the ground with like some dab stuff turn on fun funky lights good music and yeah just like made a fort on the ground out of all these pillows and blankets that was incredible loved that trip um if you have to do it indoors i feel like that is the best way if you're on the floor i feel like it's way better than being on of bed you really just always want to be connected to the earth the ground um balancing yourself so that was great also i've tripped mushrooms um with my friends and they had this little like smoke shed at their house and they had like all these trippy paintings and posters in their house and like fucking flags and they turned on lights and we were just sitting around hanging out like

bean bags like so good and then also it was warm out if it's warm out always go on a walk always if you can trip the entire trip in nature do it i used to go to the park and just sit in the park and trip and it was incredible personally i like tripping mostly in the spring and summer when um the conditions allow it's just way better i don't know how to explain it it's just so much more comforting so much better but yeah I don't know I love mushrooms I don't think they're that scary I don't know a whole lot about microdosing and I'm not sure if it really does I'm not trying to like you know be like that's a scam I just personally haven't had a ton of experience and I don't know anybody with a ton of microdosing experience um so personally like I think a great

healthy way to kind of quote-unquote micro dose um but still get a lot out of your trip is to just do a few trips a year one two three maybe um of just like a moderate amount of mushrooms two to three grams whatever you're comfortable with and if you don't want to do it then don't but if you are doing it then be safe that's the whole point of this oh my god my fucking brain tiktok i'm gonna talk about TikTok so I've been taking a break on TikTok for like a good week now not creating anything um I used to be on that app straight up for like four hours a day five hours six hours maybe longer straight up because it's really easy to sit there and scroll and scroll and scroll and feel like you need to fill a void somewhere and there's an end and I'm not sure how

to get to the end because like with Instagram you can scroll through your feed and eventually you'll see posts that you're like oh that's like you know old shit I don't need to keep scrolling anymore but with TikTok it literally just never ends and it sucks me in every time because I'm a smooth little brain girl and I love it I eat that shit up I'm manipulated so easily by the tech bros and I don't want it to happen anymore so um yeah I've been taking a little break and it's kind of been incredible I've been very bored though so I've been trying to fill it in with like I've been like picking up more shifts at work or I've been doing art like I actually have busted out my sketchbook for the first time in like forever when I was in art school they made

us keep a sketchbook um and they we did sketchbook sketchbook checks which was like very odd I've never had that happen before we weren't required to keep a sketchbook in high school like AP art but we were in college required to keep a sketchbook because they wanted to see you work out your ideas and do that physically and I think there's so many benefits from that um writing down little things that inspire you like it's like a collage if you think of it like that but with your art you're drawing your doodles fill it in with whatever it doesn't have to look good it doesn't have to look bad and I don't know why I kind of like lost that because that was like a big like one of my favorite parts of art school was just like having my own personal like mind

dump area that wasn't you know a journal it was very much so art and I stopped doing that and I've kind of fallen out of my art routine and it's because no one's pushing me but now that I'm an adult like I have to push myself I have to be the one to give myself assignments straight up so I've been trying to keep my sketchbook going and I've been trying to do at least like one page a day like there's no projects I'm working on so I can't do a whole lot of like mind mapping thought process stuff like that but I can document my day and pictures and images and words and my feelings through that as well so it's been great to get my sketchbook out I finished a book which like I haven't finished a book since oh my god since high school I don't think I read

any books in college they didn't ever assign us any books in college other than like reading that we needed to do from textbooks um I was in nursing school so the most reading that I really ever did was like in um philosophy whenever they assigned us philosophy readings um which my philosophy professor was one of the best professors i literally ever had he was the only professor at my uh old college creighton that i literally actually liked the rest were assholes and did not give a fuck about me um straight up but he was a real one he was awesome he gave me an a too i was like okay hell yeah he was like kind of awkward he was a philosophy professor but he's like awkward and bald i fucked with him though um but yeah i haven't read a book in before fucking

ever and i actually just finished one which is insane i love it um it was the um let me pull it up if you guys are interested in reading it it's a collection of short stories so it's really easy to read because like the chapters are all different if you think about it that way um but it was called homesick for another world 10 out of 10 recommend if you have any recommendations for books though let me know i love carrying a book on me at all times in my purse i'm in my purse right now so I might as well talk about it I want a bigger purse personally right now coach bags are my go-to I really want a Balenciaga bag there's like a specific bag I'm looking at but it's a little small I don't know if I can shove all of my shit in there as much as I need even

though I love the bag um but I always keep a book in there right now I'm looking at the book I always keep a book I have lip gloss I have colored pens as well as black pens um I love keeping colored pencils on me too but i don't have color pencils right now a journal and a sketchbook i always keep a joint on me and then a lighter and lip gloss and literally that's about it that's all i can really fit in there tbh but that's what i keep in my bag it's always on my when i gotta go that's literally all i need to go anywhere we literally just went over this but someone asked how to stop letting my ex back into my life i love him but loving him is exhausting girl get a restraining order get a restraining order no i'm just joking but like you really have to

low-key you have to create a restraining order in your head okay for your own betterment you have to do certain things that allow you to not be in contact with him okay because it's going to be healthier for you it's gonna be better for you you're not gonna have some broke little boy bothering you all the time okay block him delete his number block his number delete all the pictures make sure he can't reach out to you you're like well i'm so sad that my ex is reaching out to me all the time why are you allowing it because if you are not blocking them you are enabling the behavior which is like whatever whatever just do better you can do better i really believe in you um first step is literally asking this question so good for you but literally like you just have

to move on okay this question i get a lot which is why i think it's in all caps but it um someone asked me how to be a productive stoner and a lot of my college girlies are always hitting me up asking me this a lot of my like hard work and girlies are always asking me this because it is hard to be productive as a stoner does that make sense um it is something that's gonna make you you know want to binge out and hang and be a little lazy be a little self-indulgent that's like what it's for but you cannot do those things when you're trying to be productive and as much as i've liked to try to convince myself that you can and try to be like oh i can be high and productive like sure when I'm at when I was in art school I could be high and productive because I could be

high doing art it adds to my art it adds to what I'm doing I'm in class so there's a structure around me that's making me do things now if I'm just getting high at home with no one telling me what to do other than my own self and free will I don't have the best drive straight up and I have to be honest with myself and I have to know hmm when I don't have those structures around me like I should probably save it until after I do all of my stuff force a structure on myself um after I do all my chores all of my to-do's on my to-do list in my journal today I love doing that literally there's nothing more satisfying than crossing something off of a to-do list oh it's my new favorite thing literally that's my new like January obsession is crossing

shit off my to-do list in my journal um but once I cross off all my shit on my to-do list guess what you get a light up and that time frame is completely up to you you could light up at two o'clock if you get all your shit done in four hours in the morning or you could light up at 10 o'clock at night if you take all day to do it okay if you have incentive you're most likely gonna um do it quicker do it faster probably do it better you know what i mean i don't know but i think it's very important to understand that like weed is something that's gonna make you a little lazy a little tired and that's like cool it's a vibe love it but save it for when you can actually enjoy that stuff or else you're just gonna be stressed out and procrastinating and

you get stuck in a cycle and it's not fun okay experience okay someone asked me my experience with hitting a gb they hate them they they made that very clear they hated gbs this is so funny because so the first time i ever smoked i told this in like my first or second podcast i told the story of the first time i smoked i don't know you can go hunt through them but um the first time i ever smoked ever was a gb yeah like literally a whole gb and my brain almost exploded like that's a lot of weed to take for your first time people are always like how did you get high on the first time you smoke girl take a gb and you you will get high okay it's not like taking little puffs off a little joint all right that is like a full lung full like dab full amount of like smoke in

your lungs it's a lot sent me to the moon I had a great time I did not have a bad time I just hung out with my friends um but GBs were very popular with me in high school because in high school you don't earn you don't have a lot of weed you know trying to make the best of it and they get you super duper high without using a lot of weed um so like me and my friends would hang out and it's so funny we were hanging out one time and we had nothing to smoke out of because we were like all back for winter break um my high school friends like we were back for winter break on college nothing to smoke out of because we didn't want to travel with anything and um me and my friends got together and it took us less than five minutes for us to put together a gb like find all of it

burn the hole in the cap you know do whatever so we could have the whole system like rigged up i was like oh this is so funny less than five minutes we had that shit together like boom let's go take gbs that was the funniest thing but i don't know i think you know what the best bang for your buck but they do kind of kill your lungs personally it's not like my go-to um but i kind of oh i'm doing pottery right now if you guys aren't keeping up my pottery uh stuff on my instagram i posted a little bit of it on there but i wonder if i could make like a ceramic um gb like you know like seth rogan vibes you know how he has his little bong company like smoke clay company maybe i can make like a gb i don't know how i would do that though much to think about anyways that gets

me inspired oh my gosh it's like lunchtime i need to order myself something i think i'm gonna order a salad i know right like what a salad but i think it sounds really good i'm kind of craving one i don't know any salad places near me but i need to find some the only issue is that they're literally so expensive the real curse in the world is that salad restaurants are more expensive than burger places like i feel like it should be the opposite tbh but someone asked me how to feel in control of yourself and everything in your life you don't and you're on the wrong goal path because if you're trying to control everything in your life and feel in control of everything in your life you never will okay because it's never always going to be up to you there's always going to be

circumstances that arise that are up to somebody else's choices up to somebody else's decisions not something you would have thought would ever happen okay that's always gonna happen literally always i literally at one night fucking this changed my mindset completely i've told this story before but i got into a huge car accident like 2 a.m in the middle of the road like completely out of the middle of nowhere i just like was driving and then all of a sudden i woke up and my like an officer is pulling me out of my car saying i shouldn't be alive because he literally parked in the middle of the highway because there were cows falling off the highway above us because a cattle truck overturned and falling onto the highway below and i hit the

police officer because he was parked in the middle of the highway with no lights on and literally he pulled me out of the car goes you shouldn't be alive right now and literally i was not planning on any of that none of that i did not account for cows falling off of a highway above me i did not account for running into the back of a police officer i did not account for almost breaking my ankles and breaking my nose so after that happened I realized I will never ever fully be in control of my life and if I'm constantly chasing that I will constantly feel unsettled and I will feel like unfulfilled and anxious quite honestly because there's no control I get so much anxiety when I feel like I don't have control on situations or things are changing the real peace

of mind the real living the real way you should be is just accepting everything as it is and going with the flow it literally is what it is and you have to accept that the way people behave the things that happen you have no control over it and if you can't accept it and just move on well not move on but you know understand that hey it's out of your power it was out of your control and that's okay let's focus on what you can control okay if you're chasing control control control you are going to have a sad life literally an anxiety ridden life if you accept everything as it is go with the flow have hope have dreams movement kindness things are going to go very very well for you it's mercury retrograde coming up soon okay and i need all my girlies to know

actually i think today might be the first start of mercury retrograde either today or tonight i know it starts and it goes on for quite some time not too long but enough but it is a season of chaos okay it is a season of unpredictability it is a season of things are going to be testing you okay and that's okay life is all about tests and trib what was i going to say tribulations is that a fucking word anyways probably not but it's all about you know going with the flow doing what you can and not letting it get to you okay don't let it control your life let yourself control your life kind of I'm not sure if that is correct or inspirational I feel like it is I don't know I just know that a lot of my anxiety stems from when things are out of my control and a lot of my

peace stems from when I just accept it and I focus on what I can control and I move on from what I can't and just see it for what it is and take the signs for what they are tbh but i'm excited for mercury retrograde i love the chaos i love the because like chaos is not always bad you know what i mean chaos can be good chaos can be uh life-changing chaos can be inspirational chaos can be positive um and my gemini sun really craves that tbh but okay let's smoke a bowl i need to smokable i just got food ordered so we're on the right track i'm not gonna pass out i really need to get like a sandwich in me or something i'm just doing too much around my house to run out and get anything right now um let's smoke a bowl so we can refocus um i just got these new

incredible fucking pieces from dank love um they just sent those over very sweet you can check out the pieces i got on my instagram i just posted them at hannah marlene if you want to see what i'm smoking out of um but i have recently or not even recently i've always been obsessed with past packs you guys know about past packs i've talked about them all the time on here they're a cbd company um my favorite literal ever cbd company um they make the best quality freshest nicest best tasting literally like the strains they have are incredible like when you buy cbd most of the time they don't even tell you the strain like it's just cbd and you look at how much it is this they tell you the strain you know where it's grown it's grown in the u.s i believe

in venice i could be wrong could be completely wrong i need to look into that but um they are sponsoring our podcast today because they just sent me over some of their newest stuff i know i'm so excited this is something i have actually never tried and you guys have asked me a lot about it and i have um i like have not had any experience on it so i didn't know how to like answer the question but now that i've tried it i can tell you about it but it's delta a i know delta a crazy right um delta a is a it is like a weed um or like a weed it's very similar to weed the chemical compound is just a little different i believe it's just like a few chemical compounds off from weed um it's like a distant cousin i could believe is very similar which is why it's illegal um the

u.s government hasn't criminalized it except for in texas i think texas just got rid of it where i live it is completely legal everything i do where i live is is legal um but delta a i had not tried it yet because i didn't want to buy it from the i did here's the i did not want to go to the um like corner store and buy some delta a because it's always in like a fucking rick and morty cart package and i'm like this is sketch and i don't know what i'm putting in my body and that's completely scary to me um but past packs and when i fucking smoked their shit i know exactly where it's coming from I know it's not like um laced with anything or um has any like weird fillers in it does that make sense um but they sent me over uh their martian candy delta a

vape cartridge and it is incredible martian candy I was like love that first of all um but it's mostly delta a little bit of cbd little bit of cbg but um most of the time the stuff that i've used from them has been cbd so it hasn't given me a whole like the reason i personally love cbd is because it doesn't have a whole lot of psychoactive effects on you okay it's very relaxing very calming soothes the mind eases anxiety love to mix it in with my weed in the morning um when i want to be more productive but i'm not doing things that are like super productive necessary so like i can smoke a little bit you know mix some cbd in with your weed and with your little bowl that i'm literally gonna smoke now um i mix this with their let me grab

the pack i mix this with their forbidden fruit cbd tastes incredible um let's take a little hit and then I'll talk to you about Delta 8 but literally have only smoked their CBD and I've only had great experiences with it um CBD is great for like if you're a little too high it helps ground you helps bring you back down um very much so just peace positivity calming vibes if you smoke it alone um not super psychoactive but still if you want to like smoke on something like people always ask me about what do you mix herbs into your like do you have do you put rose petals do you put mullein and leaf or anything like that and the stuff you smoke and it's like no because i don't need any of that i have cbd although i could include that stuff i just don't because

the only thing i put in my shit is cbd love it but now i have delta eight to try because i know it's coming from a safe source um and i'm obsessed i kind of am obsessed although it's like very similar to weed but a little different the high is a little bit more mellower um it's not as like overwhelming tbh is kind of hard to get overwhelmed off a cart in my opinion um i have to like rip and rip and rip and rip a fucking cart if like you're trying to get really high because my tolerance is out of the like fucking sky high um so i love that it's just really easy for me to just like chill discreet could go around i'm not gonna get fucking blazed off of it but also i can like smoke it and have a good time you know what i mean um although i

think they're very similar highs and the onset to from delta eight to like i guess i think delta nine is like what you would consider real weed um the difference from delta eight to delta nine is when you smoke it and you vape it instantly you know the onset is very instantaneous like when you smoke weed you know as soon as you hit that shit like you're gonna feel it um but delta eight it feels a lot more smoother a lot more mellower and kind of not as intense so if you're interested Paz Pax has partnered with us today to give you guys um 10% off if you use code I believe Hannah Marlene let me double check that oh my god I need to actually double check that because I want you guys to get your discount um and I love Paz Pax so much and my brain is literally

blanking oh my god no it's smoke sesh easier love that it's smoke sesh code smoke sesh on pazpacks.com p-a-z-p-a-c-k-s um if you want to try it give it a shot this is personally like genuinely one of my favorite companies to work with like i don't work with people who i don't trust who i don't really find as like valuable companies to work with something that i actually want to promote to people um and love them they're incredible 10 out of 10 recommend if you give them a shot um let me know how you like it but everybody i've heard from so far who's been like hey should i try it and i've either responded or some people haven't gotten back to consider this me getting back to you about this um people ask me about it all the time like paz packs and if i like it and

yes 10 out of 10 i have their pre-roll sitting next to me i have their cbd flower sitting next to me and i have a delta 8 car sitting next to me like i have all their shit around me constantly and i'm obsessed so code smoke sesh for 10 off if you want to give it a shot okay we're gonna finish off this bowl it's an actual bowl i told you one time i did snaps which is very true usually i do do snaps but i was picking it up with like my acrylic nails this time and i kind of filled the bowl up a little too much so let's finish this bad boy off i'm obsessed with this piece i'm using right now it has little mushrooms growing off the side of the um piece and it's like baby pink and then I have a pink rose bowl with like these green leaves oh my god it's

incredible please check out my instagram at hannah marlene to see it because oh it's so pretty so pretty okay oh yeah oh my god okay once again I apologize about Tuesday's podcast i did warn you though i did warn you at the beginning of this year i was talking and i was like my goal is two times every week but if i mess it up listen i will get you one at least and i'll make it long every week my goal is two but listen all i will guarantee you one at least a week like come on and tuesdays was due to unforeseen circumstances considering not being able to control your life considering mercury rx considering uh it literally did not upload or save so i'm just gonna let that go um i can't control it usually i would that like usually when that

would happen to me like losing something that i put a lot of work into that i put a lot of effort into like completely um oh my god that used to happen to me all the time in college my papers i'd be like oh my what like where did it go this is a 12 page paper where did it go um usually that would like spiral me i would freak out like and the point of this is me being like there's like when i would freak out i thought freaking out would like somehow help the situation because i'm like feeling those emotions like emotions fully when in reality it did nothing but hurt the situation and make me more unhappy and through the process of me just like freaking out about it was I doing anything to actually like help the situation no literally nothing so when that kind

of deleted yesterday I was like we're gonna take a deep breath um and we're just gonna move on we're gonna do we're gonna do better maybe that means it wasn't supposed to come out maybe that means i can always do better love the practice let's get into it literally i was just like i just need to start recording again so thank you for sticking with me so sorry about that but yeah once again on either my instagrams i always post updates so if you're ever like where the fuck is the podcast the updates probably posted on my instagram if it's mia but let's keep going i'm almost done so i can get this to you guys we have been a holy shit i almost knocked my table over we've been a spotify exclusive podcast for like a little bit now but that was mostly because um

like i could only figure out how to update to spotify so my goal this week has been to figure out how to get my podcast on apple podcast and i'm getting there hopefully one day you will be listening to these words i'm speaking right now from apple podcast and i cannot wait for that day um but for right now literally only spotify listeners have been listening to this people have been like i had to repurchase spotify because i wanted to listen to this and then other people are like girl i had to delete spotify can you please put it on apple music and i'm so sorry i have denied you guys of that for such a long time but it is my goal this week apple podcast is just so hard to figure out how to submit to i don't know why they make it so

complicated like it should be a very easy submit give me 24 hours and it'll upload you know what i mean but it has to go through like processing and all this bs like on spotify they were like yes submit it give us 24 hours and it should appear and it did and then it hit the charts and i was like great love that apple music is like fist fighting me i don't know why but i'm determined to win so someone asked me how many bowls do i usually pack some days they said they do three others they do six but what's the in between um whatever like whatever you're comfortable with that like uh if you could do one a day if you do zero a day valid if you do 12 a day valid because that would be me like if I actually did the math of how many bowls I smoke a

oh my god i've had what is it it's like 1 25 i started at 10 a.m this morning i don't really have a bunch to do today except for like the podcast and i let myself you know smoke on podcast days because it gets me like more motivated more creative whatever same reason i smoke before our class um but i started smoking at what 10 a.m i probably had five bowls right now um i'll probably have i go into work at four i'll probably have it's 120 i'll probably have four or five more tbh um i'll go into work you know smoke at work and then that's a good what it's it's a good five hour break you know what i mean depending on how busy the day is I either am there for like a few hours or I'm there like all fucking night

there's no in between my restaurant is either dead or it's so incredibly busy um oh my god I make so much money on the good nights though I love serving so many of you guys have been like I just got a serving um job and I'm very proud of you love that but and then I'll come home and then I'll take like three to five dabs so it's a lot like it's a lot like I have never had this high of a tolerance in my entire life tbh my tolerance has always been very low I think it's just because I'm always with my boyfriend and we always smoke together like it's a very social thing for us the same way like people would probably drink together I don't think people are drinking in the morning hopefully not um but like me and my boyfriend just smoke together like

he offers me a dab what am i gonna do say no like of course i want a dab you know so i don't know i don't think i don't think it gets in it hasn't become problematic yet we'll see i don't think it's really a problematic issue for me right now i just have a lot of free time and i'm like yeah i'll smell that's my issue um next question oh how to deal with a forced tolerance break slash how to better your mental health in school well how to better your mental health in school you have to force yourself into a tolerance break also in school you have to give yourself a routine you have to be very on top of your routine when i was in school the only reason i was stressed out is because i didn't know when things were due and i didn't know when i needed to do them and i didn't

know and i didn't know and it was scary so just know like that is completely up to you you just have to get a fucking planner love a planner love a big wall calendar um love like a calendar on your phone that you always see um love journaling love writing goals through that um loved when I was in college I'd have a sticky note like on my computer I keep my computer very clean like um uncluttered and then I would have like a sticky note like you know the sticky note app on my computer screen and then I would have all of my to-dos for the week on that based out by day um and then i planned that based on what was in my calendar so i could look ahead and i would do that every month um so i just think you know planning for the future saves you a lot of stress

in the present um and then makes the present more enjoyable for yourself now i did have to have to force myself to take a tolerance break in college um because i just could not focus i just wanted smoke all the time not do it so i was like cold turkey was the way to go literally tbh tolerance breaks aren't that hard once you just distract yourself with other things if you're sitting around all day doing nothing like of course you're gonna want to smoke i don't know go sign up for clubs go get a part-time job go on a walk go do something you have to keep yourself moving keep active and also just like try to not be around it that's really all i can say about a forced tolerance break you really just have to keep yourself motivated going and keep goals planned

for yourself keep activities keep hobbies planned for yourself you know how literally this is like I was a nanny for like a year and a half during the pandemic because I didn't really want to be around the general public during a pandemic so I was like nannying it is love that um so the way I was to the two and five-year-old I nannied is the way you also have to be towards yourself your you yourself are the five-year-old okay you are the child but like once you become an adult you're your own adult you're your kind of own parent you know what I mean you have to do the play date planning you have to do the school meeting planning you have to do the vacation planning you have to know when that school project is due okay so you can have brownie mix for the kids

project you know you have to be that for yourself and it sucks it's hard and i know like what the f why are we like why did human nature turn us into this like i have to plan for my future now i can't just go hunt and forage for berries and probably die at like 27 this is a scam but it's what we're living and the more you plan the less you'll um have anxiety the better you'll feel in the present the more you'll enjoy your life 10 out of 10 because i've been like really trying to do that at the beginning of this year like really trying to get into the habit of like organizing my life getting excited for the future so i can feel calm in the present moment and i have been doing just like little steps every day and it has helped so much so i don't know i think that's kind

of the best way so we're gonna end this podcast with two long questions you guys sent to my dms um i thought they were very valid i was like let's dive into these yes um also my sandwich is getting here soon so we need to get this going so i can eat and devour it because i think it's hot and i don't want to get gross anyways let me read this to you um hannah queen hi hi my boyfriend of seven months cannot have sex less than eight hours apart it's super annoying because i know this isn't something he can't exactly control but i feel shitty because it makes me feel like he doesn't want to do it again he says it's hard for him to get horny again our sex is good but he comes early because he's literally an 18 year old boy but i'm left disappointed because

i want to keep having sex like he's like i can finish you but it's not the same like i want to get fucked does that make sense no valid girl valid i try to not get upset about it but i but literally he can't go round two ever he doesn't even try and it makes me feel insecure i've been with guys who go like four times in a row and it makes me feel like he's less attracted to me if that makes sense on the recent episode you said your record with your uh bf was eight and i was like holy shit i need to ask you about this i've loved smoking to you literally my therapy outlet illy thank you for sending me this in i thought this was like very valid okay first of all i'm assuming you're 18 as well you're dealing with an 18 year old boy here okay i'm

assuming he probably hasn't had a lot of sexual experience okay which is all right valid we all have varying levels of sexual experience you might have more than him that's okay um this might be a learning moment you guys can do together he just has to be you know open to it um but like if he doesn't have a lot of sexual experience he's probably jerking off all the time and if you jerk off all the time i think like porn and masturbation although i'm not saying he does this this is a very valid issue with a lot of teen boys though um masturbation uh addictions porn addictions okay porn literally warps your mind it's super hard to get sexual super hard to get like in the moment present physically if you have a porn addiction um i think it ruins a lot of men

and um masturbation as well like if he's masturbating all the time when you guys aren't together although that's like valid fine like i've been like i talk like i listen you can masturbate whenever you want but also like if you're seeing your partner and you know you want to like i don't know how to put this save up some like you know then maybe do that so then you guys can have a better time together when you guys are hanging out you know what i mean and that's on him um also he maybe needs to learn what edging is um he maybe just doesn't know but like if he can only come once that's fine that's valid everybody's like varying levels of sensitive after they come i feel like some people can only come once okay they are just simply oh my god my doorbell is

bringing my sandwiches here love that some people can only come once valid fine but like work with it communicate talk about it don't feel ashamed if he can't come multiple times then maybe like edging is the thing if you can only last a few minutes okay when he's about to literally just like pause take a little break go to kissing you know take everything out of you like very minimal touching and then go back to it when it's like chilled out you know you can work through it you just do have to communicate and be open to working with each other all right i don't think you need to feel insecure i don't think he's any less attracted to you i think he's probably very attracted to you guys are dating okay um i don't think you're probably doing anything wrong same

way he's not really doing anything wrong just switch it up so it's more pleasurable for both of you maybe include more foreplay for you if you are like i need more out of this um but sex like once the dick's inside me like he's gonna come in two minutes that's fine do 15 minutes of foreplay literally like if you want sex to be longer maybe it just needs to be a different part of sex sex isn't always fucking p and v you know it can be anything it's like anything that is sensual and together i feel like anyways that's my rant but i don't want you to feel insecure like very valid very fine sex is confusing just communicate i think you guys can absolutely work it out okay so on my twitter i tweeted this and it actually did pretty good a

lot of people i do twitter to kind of like it's a very small following but i get on there to kind of test you know wordplay tweets that do well and then i turn those into tiktoks usually i kind of just like test ideas it's kind of like a sketchbook if you could think of it that way but i don't know twitter um um i had this introspection over the weekend when i saw um fez on euphoria and then thought about myself um but i was like my i can save him complex comes from every teacher sitting me next to the problem kid because i was kind and quiet now i only date drug dealers and can't do math so thanks a lot literally i was the kid who was like i'm a great mediator i am so sweet so nice like non-confrontational at all i do not want people to ever be mad at me like very like

quiet cooperative and i always got sat next to the problem fucking kids to kind of fix them i'm like it worked because like i'm cool with everybody like i'm gonna be friends with everybody i don't really give a fuck um and then they would like be quiet with me if i was being quiet and not to listen to the teacher because they were trying to impress me but now like i did not pay attention to anything in school and like my taste in men is not the best but that's i need to send that to my therapist tbh but someone asked me this is another long question um hi i've been listening to your podcast for weeks and i wanted to ask thank you for listening first of all how you overcame the anxiety of confrontation i hate being confrontational because i'm so scared that people

will i literally just butchered the word confrontational i hate being confrontational because i'm so scared that people will try to turn it around on me or get upset with me when in reality i just want to set clear boundaries and have my wants and needs be heard rather than silence because I was too anxious to stand up for myself okay pause you hate being confrontational but being confrontational why do you always see is a bad thing is it because anytime you've been confronting confronted about something it's been very harsh and critical and not done in a well way hmm much to think about there's ways you can be confrontational and not be rude mean hurting anybody's feelings very much just coming from the heart because like you said i just want to

set clear boundaries and have my wants and needs be heard rather than silenced that's very simple to do you got to just stand up for yourself a little little bit just a little bit okay we're gonna keep reading though avoiding confrontation is something i do way too often it's nearly debilitating and sometimes affects my life in ways i don't want it to felt a lot of time it gets so bad that i don't want to make important phone calls or things like that because it makes me so nervous also felt if you have any advice on how to overcome that anxiety obviously i need to go to therapy i know lol i would love to hear it also thank you for thank you so much for this podcast i hope you know how many people you are helping including a confused college student like

me navigating life is a little bit easier and i appreciate a ton oh my god that is so sweet that is really so sweet okay i see a lot of myself in this sweet girl um i am literally or not anymore but i used to be and i i just didn't confront anybody about anything if someone's talking bad on me i let it happen if um things weren't going good for me i let it happen if i didn't know how to fix something i let it happen and i don't know why i just like would refuse to take accountability for my own life and when that continued for a long time of my life tbh um it continued all the way through not through college but i dropped out of nursing school and dropping out of nursing school was the first time i ever had to take accountability for my life

because i was like i don't have any structure i don't have anything going on no one's rooting for me tbh no one wants me to do this no one thinks this is a good idea no one's on my side no one is vouching for me period no one is no one is so i had to realize like i'm alone if no one's gonna stand up for me who is okay like who is and it wasn't gonna be my friends it wasn't gonna be my parents it wasn't going to be anybody but myself I have learned very quickly that if you do not ask for it it will not happen if you do not speak up it will not happen okay saving people's other people's feelings minimizes yours and pushes yours down and makes you like feel heavier more anxious you do not need that okay get it off your chest you will feel so much better and

you're afraid of people's reactions you're afraid of big reactions me personally is because i just had very bad interactions with people in the past and the way confrontation was handled um so i was afraid of that happening again and i realized in the real fucking world people handle confrontation very well people handle that shit very well okay i have navig or i have um negotiated so many like like payments in the past year that i couldn't even have imagined i would have received ever because i just simply asked for it i knew my worth i knew what i was worth i wrote that down for them explain that to them and people are willing to pay you if you know your worth and you're willing and able to explain that to them straight up who the fuck would have thought same

thing when i got my first ever hosting job they were offering me like fucking 725 and the uh like winery on the plaza was offering me like 21 or like a shit ton of money so i went to my boss at the time i was like listen like i did not want to do this at all um i would have rather died or just like gone to the other place but my parents were like you need to learn how to fucking stand up for yourself and no one is gonna go talk to this person other than you like this is your boss so i went to her straight up i was like can we talk um and i was like i love working here this is why i'm coming to you first but i got offered another place and they're offering me this can you work with me and i thought it was gonna be like a no fuck you get out of here kind of

situation but she was like nope give me a day i will talk to my boss we can see if we can negotiate your wages and we would love to keep you here so i'm gonna try and get it done for you period everybody is usually on your side and even if you're speaking up and setting clear boundaries if you're doing that to somebody who is actually genuinely important to you and somebody who is gonna be like an important figure in your life and i don't know have any sort of sustenance in your life they're gonna respect that they're gonna respect your words respect your boundaries if they don't that just means that you need to do some deep thinking on their character and what place you want them to play in your life not on your worth and who you are okay those are the

wrong questions to be asking you can judge people's reactions and judge their character for that okay if they're freaking out about you setting boundaries that's a red flag all right They should not be doing that. They should be able to be willing and very open to working with you and understanding where you're coming from, all right? And I don't know. I just think your life will open up so much more when you start stepping up and standing out for yourself. Does that make sense? And it does take just like little baby steps, okay? Because you have to see the actual results in real life um i could tell you this and you could be like yeah that's bullshit hannah but until you go out there and actually like start small and start taking little

steps of accountability and seeing like the positive reactions that it does actually have on your life um then you'll start believing me and then you'll start doing more because now i'm like addicted i'm addicted i love standing up for myself i love it also helps me connect better with myself and kind of understand who I am and my identity and where I want to fall into this world I don't know that might be a little too deep for this question but stand up for yourself I believe in you it's not scary everybody's usually on your side and if they're not they're assholes and they should be out of your life anyways I'm gonna need to eat this sandwich anyways I think that's our podcast you guys you want to take one more bowl with me before I let you go um some people were

asking me oh why the fuck not answer one more question i gotta load this bowl anyways but some people are asking me if i was planning on getting any more tattoos and i kind of am like recently i've been getting more into tattoos and i've been looking more into some i have a few i've talked about them a little bit on this podcast you can go on my instagram and see them really the only real tattoos i have is like this eye on the back of my neck and then my sumac leaves on my arm which were really big that's probably like the most money i've ever spent on a tattoo and i can't believe i spent that much money on my second tattoo um it was like 500 and it took like five hours um maybe six it took forever um to go through that as like your second tattoo experience

was like excruciating also like i was not prepared to go through that much pain like i never it like wasn't a lot of pain at first but then you get on hour four and you're like holy shit he has tattooed over the same place three times because there's an outline he does shading and then he's highlighting and i was like oh my god i got a grim tattoo though if you guys go anywhere in kansas city let me know your favorite tattoo places um but i want to get i have so many ideas i have so many ideas i want to get some angel numbers somewhere not sure where i want to get a cat like you know how cats stretch they do like the downward dog stretch i'm gonna get one of those um i want to get a tattoo of i see all these tattoos of like little they're like cute little

stars and like little sparkles and you can like put them different places to like accentuate places I want a lot of hand and finger tattoos so I think that would be fun to get there um I have a lot of very odd words I want to get like different sayings I don't know but those are all like very small I don't have any plans for like big tattoos and none super soon um the one I got my arm was very big but it was like for a reason um I think the only reason I get another big tattoo would be like for a specific reason again I'm not sure why I'm kind of picky about things other people just like don't give a fuck they're like if it looks cool put it on me and like respect i love that i think you can that's like beautiful like of course when people are

like oh what are the meaning of your tattoos like sometimes you can just be like i thought it looked cool like literally like does there have to be a meaning no but i'm just a little weird and i also i'm an artist and i like putting thought into things it's been conditioned into me um to do so but let's rip this bowl oh my god thank you guys oh my gosh thank you guys for joining me i had a great time today um i will see you guys next week the usual tuesday and thursday go follow you know you know the okay paz packs smoke sash 10 off they got you on all cbd and delta 8 needs all right and they've awesome pre-rolls at hannah marlene and at smoke sash shawty are my instagrams um but at hannah

marlene is where i do put up the questionnaire for the podcast if you have a question you want to send to me feel free to do it on the monday when i put up the questionnaire or feel free to just dm it to me whenever you think of it if you're not gonna remember it either way works for me I love you guys so much thank you for being here thank you for spending your time with me thank you for sharing your time and energy with me I love being here I love doing this I love seeing us climb the charts it's incredible I love seeing how many people listen to this every day I get dms every day and they're like I like just found your podcast it's my new favorite thing thank you so much for being here and it makes me so happy putting creative

energy into something that is reaching so many people and i really appreciate you being here love you we will get through this together take a hit for me or if you don't smoke take a deep breath for me and drink some water aha girl rule number one is literally stay hydrated straight up anyways i'll let you guys go i love you so much see you tuesday