Smoke Sesh - starting over, winter solstice & setting goals

Episode Date: December 23, 2025

hello and happy holidays my smoke sesh family, today we catch up over the holidays on some of the most popular topics such as entering the new year, hangovers, dry January, hectic holidays, messed up schedules, winter solstice, making wishes, 13 wishes spell, what wishes came true? making goals, sticking to goals, building momentum, starting over in life, clean slate, new years plans, celebrating the year in style, what I'm manifesting for the new year and much much more!submit your questions follow the instagram at hannahmarlenejoin the patreon club at patreon.com/smokeseshshawtywatch the vlogs at YouTube.com/hannahmarlene444

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and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. This episode is brought to you by Accenture. When your advertising operations fall out of sync, everything else follows. Spotify and Accenture are working together to reinvent the rhythm of ad sales, using automation, analytics, and smarter workflows to simplify campaign delivery and access better data across the business. The result? Less time spent on operations,

more time connecting brands with the moments and fandoms that matter most. Learn more at Accenture.com slash Spotify. listen everybody needs a fairy godmother you know just somebody to look out for them some people call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sash so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all hello hello hello and happy holidays my loves welcome back to another episode of smoke sesh my name is hannah your host and i am so excited to be back with you all this week oh my god my

schedule is completely out of routine listen i love the holidays ooh joy whimsy lights trees presents. Yeah. Fantastic. And then I became an adult and my adult brain started forming and I was like, Oh my God, routines, regularity, um, doing things on time. What the fuck happened to that? I understand why my mom was so stressed in the kitchen every single holiday. I was like, girl, have a drink. It's not that deep. And then now that I'm older, I'm like, Oh, I get it. i get it i understand why you're a little miserable okay you're cooking about 18 000 dishes for family members you don't even like you're having to do work on days you don't want to do work oh you thought you just get time off of work no you still gotta work and figure out how to do

it with screaming children all around you and you have to do it on the weekends instead of the weekdays because the weekdays are saved for holiday things i'm recording this early because i'm actually in omaha when you'll be listening to this omaha nebraska yes yes the beautiful lands of omaha nebraska i'm visiting family my brother i'm gonna go stay with him celebrate the holidays a little bit but that means yeah my routines are all out of sorts they are all out of whack and i have learned listen i talk about routines a lot i have learned i love it i love my routines I love knowing what I'm going to have for breakfast in the morning. I love knowing what's on my schedule.

I love knowing what's on tomorrow's schedule. I love clocking in and then subsequently clocking out. I love it. It's great. My brain is like, yes, we know what to expect. It's fantastic. It's fun. We have some time here.

Maybe we can do something fun. Oh my gosh. but then as soon as it gets all out of whack i feel like my life is crumbling around me and then i'm supposed to sit here and focus on joy and whimsy i'm like ah losing it internally now some of you guys might be on a holiday break from college or from school wherever you might be maybe even work goddamn and i am jealous of you i hope you guys eat a ton of yummy holiday food i hope you get everything you wished for under the tree because you deserve it but yeah with that being said i worked last night and i was up super fucking late probably till like 2 or 3 a.m whoops

it happens sometimes it is what it is i was having fun and you know once hannah starts having fun she can't stop having fun and the thing is i didn't even drink a lot you know like i think when you think oh hannah's having fun or maybe this is what i think it's like oh she's drinking a lot that's usually what it means no last night i had like maybe three shots and not any mixed drinks just a couple shots and i woke up this morning literally ears ringing walls spinning mouth the sahara desert sweating oily greasy uh getting older it's just the hangovers are really not worth it it really takes all the fun out of drinking because i'll get one drink in and i'm like i don't want to feel like a messy slop tomorrow so why the fuck would i even have

another one at this point and i fear that's just growing up i fear that's just growing up so if you're young not to encourage drinking but if you're young and you don't have those hangovers because i was that person at one point in time 21 year old hannah 20 year old hannah oop anyways ages before that whatever she would have i don't know so many different things going into her system that should not be there that probably weren't needed to be there at all and i would wake up in the morning and be like oh the sun is out I am alive the birds are chirping let me go drive and get Duncan and then clock into work oh I feel so rested and amazing that is crazy to think about because there is no way in fucking hell that is gonna happen now and I'm 26 I'm talking as if

I'm 82 I'm 26 and I'm feeling this way I can't even imagine what the rest of the years are going to look like the thing with the holiday season though sometimes you need a little drink to get you by but I am planning on doing dry January I'm looking forward to dry January this will be my third year doing dry January yes third year isn't that crazy time fucking flies I feel like I've been living in a ether world for quite some time we'll get into that in a little bit i feel the need to start over completely on my life i'm gonna give you the deets on how i'm gonna do that but listen getting through the holiday season the family the craziness the hecticness mama needs a drink here and there okay so dry january will make its time known when it needs to be but for

the next couple weeks i'm gonna allow myself to indulge just a little bit here and there and manage through the headaches the hangovers that the holidays encompass but yes dry january looking forward to it if you've never done dry january i highly recommend it i know last episode we talked about quitting um weed or taking time off from any sort of substance and this is the perfect time to do so january i feel like everybody else is kind of on the same goals the same path so you have that kind of community excitement you don't feel like you're going through it alone i'm sure somebody else in the realm of existence is also doing dry January in the vicinity of where you live the first year it was really hard it was very hard and I really wanted to challenge myself

the first year to uh think about like why I craved drinking um it wasn't that like I had a problem to per se but it was like why do I feel the need to do this so I was very intentional the first year about how I went about dry January where I was like every time I felt like I craved alcohol or like damn I could really use a fucking drink I wrote down why I was feeling that way so sometimes it was like oh I'm stressed about a b c or d sometimes it was like oh I'm sad and I just need to feel good sometimes it's like oh I'm with friends and they're having a drink you know but I realized after writing down you know all the times I kind of wanted to and why the how of it all i went back through it after dry january was over which the funny thing about taking time off

it usually lasts longer than a fucking month i think i went a full three months the first year i went back through my list and i was like okay let's see the common denominator here and why it keeps popping up and why it keeps happening and it turned out for me it was more of like a coping mechanism that i use for stress so taking that time away gave me opportunities to learn more about myself my behaviors my compulsions because best believe I have plenty of those and maybe kind of redirect in a healthier manner and redirect to some healthier ideas healthier ways of coping instead of just like chugging a shot of vodka which also maybe I'm crazy for this but my go-to drink when I do drink is vodka I think I've been in the restaurant industry so

long I just any of the aperitifs the usual aperitifs people go for can't do it whiskey can't do it I grew up shooting whiskey with my old bartender like at fucking 18 at the in the restaurant industry I can't do it I can't even smell it it makes me nauseous the only thing that doesn't is vodka and I that's like real alcoholic hours it's like what do you mean you're drinking lukewarm vodka with a splash of pineapple so yeah my body my brain I'm very I'm looking forward to it this year last year I learned about kind of more so not the compulsion aspect but actually incorporating those tools and those coping mechanisms that I discovered the first year and now that I have both of those things under my belt locked and loaded okay I am very

excited for this year because I feel like I've set myself up for success where I have fully understood myself I fully understand why um and I'm just like genuinely looking forward to taking a break taking some time off and using that as an opportunity to focus on me myself and I so if you've been thinking about it and you want to do it together join me it'll be fun it's like I said it's funny how dry january then turns into like sober february and then it just keeps spilling into the other months it's important to take time away from things that you maybe are too indulgent and and to be aware of those behaviors so that's what's on the forefront of my fucking mind today that's for sure since i'm filming this early i did not upload the questionnaire so sorry but i am

going completely vibes based this is a intuitive episode if you've ever heard of one i am literally reaching out into the void speaking to the universe and asking what do the fucking girls need to hear what do they need to hear okay approaching the end of the year approaching holiday season speaking of if you're looking to gift your lover something so amazing this year or you need a little self-care a little self-love join the patreon patreon.com smoke says shawty we have a lot of fun over there new year's coming up we have the winter solstice coming up oh my god actually the winter solstice just happened we'll talk about that in a second new year's goals new year's planning new year's spells extra episodes literally so much

is going on over there come join we'd love to have you in the community the girls have a blast on the patreon and i'm sure you would love to as well but i did share a little winter solstice spell slash ritual that i wanted to go over with you guys here you can still do it even though um it's usually supposed to be done it's called the 13 wishes so it's done on the winter solstice and it's 13 days that then leads up to the new year so that's why it's 13 wishes you can start this whenever you want it just might not be 13 you're gonna count from whatever day you start on up until the new year so maybe it's seven wishes maybe it's 10 wishes it's okay we can kind of navigate and adjust where we need to but it is a very fun ritual to do leading into the new year

and my first year doing it was last year i did not accomplish it i did not accomplish it but that doesn't mean that some of the wishes didn't come true so here's the thing depending on how many days you got you write down one wish on a slip of paper okay so if you're doing 13 you write down 13 different wishes you have for the new year dream big okay nothing is off the table listen the universe is on your side and it wants to spoil you it wants to make everything that you could possibly even imagine a reality so do not hold yourself back ever when it comes to wishing bitch if you had a genie in a bottle in front of you and it said you can have anything you want are you gonna hold yourself back and be like well i just i don't know if i can have this thing

no you're gonna be like i need a million dollars cash right fucking now i don't know how i'm gonna get it but it's gonna be right in front of me so dream big okay 13 wishes write them down on slips of paper and then each evening leading up to the new year you burn one slip of paper okay you burn it away that is what the universe is going to take care of on the last day the 13th day which is new year's day you are left with one slip of paper open up that piece of paper that is your one goal for the year that is what the universe is tasking you to handle and the universe is saying to you if you handle this I'll take care of the rest baby girl don't even worry about it I'll make sure the rest comes true you just handle this one thing right here make sure

you have the list written down somewhere else so you can kind of go back through and at the end of the year really focus and readjust but last year the wish that I was tasked with coming true for myself was drumroll please and like i said dream big getting a house that was my one big wish getting a house so i opened that up on new year's day and i was like okay hannah hannah the universe is telling you you can have this you just need to do it yourself you just need to go after this one thing everything else will fall into place everything else will happen you just need to handle this one thing and i got to work i'm not even kidding i got to work i was like all right I'm getting a house I'm getting a house I don't know how I'm doing it I don't know where it's

gonna be I'm getting a fucking house obviously you're looking behind me like bitch you're still in the same place yeah I mean I tried I was literally in negotiations for a house for upwards of a month like and thank god if I'm being honest that it didn't come true because like I'm gonna move soon I do not need a house at all but I think I've made a home so although it's like I didn't get a house maybe in the way I was imagining I have made my home more structured than I ever have in my entire life where it's like I feel comfortable where I am in the space that I am in the body that I am in the mind that I am I feel like I've built a home out of it but did I necessarily accomplish that one wish that i was looking for no i did kind of give up on it the

universe granted me some of the wishes that i dreamed of but not all of them obviously because i didn't do the one thing but i'll go ahead and read you my 13 wishes from last year and tell you what actually did come true number one on the list new luxury car what do i have parked outside new luxury car was it the way i thought i would ever get it no you guys remember last year when my car got two and five canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar raised matters on september 19th join thousands in toronto for the princess margaret cancer foundation walk challenge yourself friends and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research together we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear

of cancer register today at pmcfwalk.ca stolen and then i was panicking running around like holy shit where the fuck is my car and also i don't have it no i had insurance but it was just like liability so i couldn't get any money out of it even if i did find it and it was kind of just like a really old beaded up car which like if you are young and broke drive that thing with pride until it crashes to the ground honestly there's nothing wrong with it but i kept saying in the back of my head i want a mazda cx5 i want a mazda cx5 i want a mazda cx5 car got stolen two days later i'm like fuck it there's one listed it's the cheapest i've ever seen in my entire life let's go buy it interior color I wanted exterior color I wanted minimal miles fantastic new luxury

car done done number two financially successful off my art you know what I would say I would say yes I would say I am um do I still work many other jobs on the side yeah yeah that's just my own mental illness getting in the way but I do make money doing what I love and I think that is most important I think I'm going to keep this wish for this year I might rewrite it back down because I've been getting into painting and I would love to start maybe making money and be financially successful off fine art so I will adjust what the universe did bless me with that second one number three physically in the best shape of my life dot dot dot motherfucker i used to run cross country i obviously am not in the best shape of my life i don't even know if the

universe could have granted that one like bitch get to work but i remember when i would wake up at like 8 a.m and go run 11 miles who was i obviously no best shape of my life no but do i feel good in my body yes yes i do number four travel to three different places i did not do that well maybe if you consider places within an hour distance but i did go to japan and i think that is the equivalent of traveling to three different places in the united states um and i'm so thankful for that trip i literally think about that trip every single day i cannot wait to go back so kind of came true kind of didn't that's okay another year more opportunities number five which is the one that obviously i slipped up on have my own house yeah no mama is

not ready for a house yet not in Kansas City baby girl needs to get out of here first number six big savings account oh we're getting there we're getting there number seven healing and healthy I'll say yes I'll say yes to that one number eight learn more I have been on my reading grind this year I did challenge myself to read one book a month and I did that easily very easily um i think i'm gonna add two books a month to my roster now just because i crave um a good paperback book there's nothing better than just like being stuck in bed with a book in hand like no one talked to me no one speak to me i can barely get up to go to the bathroom because this book is so good yeah i love that it is just so nice and cathartic also learning more i've

been taking more classes like i started horseback riding lessons i'm going to be taking some fine art classes on the side just to kind of like get my knowledge and technical skills back up and I think we really um stop thinking about how important knowledge and learning is when we're an adult because you go oh well I graduated college or I got my master's or my doctorate I know everything there is to know like I don't need to keep learning but that's not good for us like we do need to be learning every single day and the longer that i've been out of college the more i've been craving it just to kind of expand my knowledge to know more about myself to know more about the world around me it's a gift it's a blessing and we really shouldn't take it for granted no matter

what you're learning about especially in this day and age when they want us all to be stupid okay so yes number nine and probably the one i wished for the most the one i really was like god please if you're out there hear my prayers health and peace for danger if you don't remember last year danger was going through quite the health scare just it wasn't even like it wasn't like horrible awful like he wasn't like sick and rolling around and dying it was just like i know he's uncomfortable and i know it's not fun and like oh like a cat with sorry trigger warning anal gland issues oh my god what is happening like literally even my vet was like i've only ever seen this in dogs he's like i am talking to other vets across the globe and my old teachers from veterinary school

trying to figure this out like he was locked in i was locked in on fucking google like it took us from the end of december middle of december all the way until march of this year to figure out how to fully heal him and get that shit quite literally on track all right and it costed me thousands of dollars hours days of sleepless nights of worrying of crying of a unnecessary anxiety condition but i would go through it all again and spend all the money and worry as much as i did if it meant that he would get better and he did thank god he is peacefully sleeping over in his little cat nest watching the birds watching the squirrels enjoying his time pooping freely without any pain thank god amen to that that's what i truly would wanted throughout

the year um I would literally give my life for that cat I'm not even kidding if you don't have a pet you just won't get it that is my child and I am just so incredibly happy and thankful that he is good uh there's nothing like scarier or more heart-wrenching than when something or somebody you love is just going through a health scare so if you're going through that right now I lend you my heart I lend you love and light and I pray that everything will be okay in the end so thank you thank you universe for that number 10 grow hair long yes and we will be growing it longer no haircut she is just going strong I'm kind of like at this point in time I'm like let's see how long we can get it let's see just how long we can get it because I know my hair will stop growing

at some point I know it'll be like this is all you're getting bitch you know I don't think it's gonna grow to my feet but I want to challenge myself and see how far I can get I think I can get at least another four inches this year if it allows me so shout out to that 11 get tattoo apprenticeship oh I have some of you guys that have been asking me about that journey um I kind of fell off on that because I kept like putting it in the distance I kept being like okay well after this I'll go apply well after this I'll go apply well after this I'll go apply and it kind of just got ahead of me and then I realized yeah that is a great idea great opportunity fantastic especially if you're into into art and you're trying to make money off of your art tattooing

is the absolutely best way to go about it I think it's very approachable getting apprenticeship can be very challenging and difficult but if you find the right shop and you keep putting yourself out there I think you absolutely can find one if you commit to technical skills and penmanship and a steady hand I think you can really put your best foot forward and get an apprenticeship and make your way in the tattoo industry but I realized very quickly I was like it's a lot of commitment and I don't think it's necessarily what I want what I want to do and that kind of made me fall off a little bit on the whole apprenticeship bandwagon and looking back on where I was last year where I was like this is it I'm getting an apprenticeship I know what I want to do for the

rest of my life it's so funny how you get that way and then all of a sudden you're like no that is not what I wanted but that's okay sometimes you have to go through that period of like um trying things out and it's okay if they don't work it's okay if you're like actually I just don't think this is for me and I don't think it is for me I think art is for me yes and artists tattoo artists have the best skill in the entire world and taking about six months of my time last year to really practice technical penmanship and getting steady lines and like shading and shade work was a really good way for me to get back into the art scene and kind of like practice my abilities which I'm very thankful for but I realized I want to go more in a fine art direction

I love painting painting is where my heart lays and diving into that I mean recently has really showed that to me and it brought back that spark that you know tattooing and getting an apprenticeship started but just it wasn't the right direction and that's okay you know I think it's okay to understand this isn't for me and to move forward accordingly so no tattoo apprenticeship for me personally but if it's something you want to go after go after it full throttle okay i guarantee you can make your way in the world 12 connect to nature slash spiritual yeah i definitely have been more spiritual and a little more in nature than i was any of my other years not as much as i'd like to be i mean if it was up to me i'd be rolling around in a mossy forest every single day but

it's just that's just not how the world was cut out for you baby girl and that's okay one of these days you will i definitely want to do more of that next year get outside more um but spiritual wise i've been very spiritual this year and it's been it's been nice i still want to dive deeper into it spell work things like that but we're getting there every year is one step closer number 13 adorned in gold jewelry yes oh my goodness i got so many new gold pieces this year um if you don't know where to find jewelry ebay like i can't even lie ebay has the best vintage jewelry not spons although they should because the amount of money i spend on ebay is insane my i just bought prada heels off of ebay they were such a good find sexy ass pointed toe white prada heels

pristine condition I don't care if they're fake or not they were $50 what yeah eBay fantastic I got my I don't know if you have ever seen the little opal that I have with diamonds all around it I got that off of eBay for like a hundred bucks any of the gold chains I have I've gotten off of eBay for under a hundred probably under 80 bucks my gold hoops I got off of eBay for 50 bucks and then my other gold pieces are from yeah it's jewelry where if you want really really nice high-end new gold jewelry yeah it's jewelry is the place to shop but i would say you know what 70 of those wishes came true and i'm happy with that i'm satisfied with that i'm feeling good those were good goals those were good ideas i'm excited to wish for more this year but it's a fun

practice it's good to set goals for yourself it's good to kind of like get connected with yourself and build new ideas on who you want to be and who you want to become and it's also fun to look back after the year and go oh my god wow who knew all those things that i wanted would have came true or thank fucking god that didn't come true you know what i mean it's funny how time will do that but yes fun activity highly recommend doing it with however many days you have just utilize the days accordingly one wish per day burn that shit send it away to the universe on the first of 2026 open it that is your goal for the year that is what you are being tasked with handling and i know you can handle it thank god i didn't get a house though that's one of those i'm like oof

dodged a bullet i did i did because here's the thing i'm entering an era where and the tiktok girlies know this oh someone commented it was like what's hannah's tiktok i only know her old account i have two my old account is this smoke says shoddy where if you ever watched me like 2021 or 2020 that's where i blew up on but my alt account which is the one i actually post on is fairy smoke mother m-o-t-h-a fairy smoke mother i'm entering an era where i'm like I need to burn everything to the ground and start over don't worry not this podcast this this thing will be around till I fucking die I'm gonna be 80 years old in a old folks home it's gonna be me with a sparkly pink podcast mic in hand like like this brings me so much joy I could not even

imagine getting rid of it more so like um I need to change everything about me fundamentally and what i am doing in life because because because because there's something silly about your mid 20s i would say 24 25 26 maybe even like 23 23 24 25 26 where you enter a limbo period it really is a limbo period where you don't accomplish a lot but it flies by you know you accomplish a lot in your early 20s where you're like I have to figure this shit out and I'm stressed but I need to figure this fucking shit out like I need a job I need to do this I need to move here I need an apartment you know like all the adult things I need insurance okay you usually figure all that out in your early 20s mid-20s and then you hit that mid-20s limbo where you're like I did it

I did it I figured everything out I did I mean there's always new things to learn universe don't don't throw me lessons like it's more so metaphorically I'm like let me be very careful with my words but you do hit a phase where you're comfortable so if you're uncomfortable in your early 20s don't worry you will get comfortable soon but then then and this is where I am you hit like 26 27 28 okay you're approaching 30 which is a fantastic age and I cannot wait to be it but you reach your end period of your 20s and you're like oh wow I've been doing the same thing for the past three years and it's felt good but I can't live this way forever like it's good for now but I can't live this way forever and something about that feeling makes me want to just burn

everything to the ground and start over I need to use that I need to be very careful with my words because I live in a very old fucking apartment and this thing could go up in flames at any point in time not burn but like gently restart my life in a way that just kind of like invigorates me gets me excited about life and brings forth newness I think if anything I'm just craving newness I'm very happy with where I am and I'm very thankful for everything I've accomplished and you know all the hard work that i've put into my life it's been so good and i i completely am living the dream that i wanted to live at 13 14 like it's honestly crazy looking back but also it's like i want more mama wants two and five canadians will hear the words you have cancer

that's why every step and dollar raised matters on september 19th join thousands in toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca. More, mama needs more.

And not in an unhealthy way, unsustainable way, but in a, I have to go after it. if I don't go after all of my dreams then I am living a dishonest life truly truly when you go against your gut go against your gut feeling go against your dreams go against what feels good for you you are living a dishonest life truly and the thing is I have let go of many opportunities I have oh but oh but maybe oh but I shouldn't out of fear and that has turned me into kind of living a dishonest life of like bitch it's good but it can get better if you're just brave if you're just brave you don't have to completely like chaotically shut your life down but there is

something about it that really just like it invigorates a spark in your soul that just gets you so empowered and so excited I've done this once in my life one time in my life and it's when I dropped out of college a nursing school I dropped out of nursing school it completely changed my life not that you need to drop out of school but my version of kind of like burning my life down starting over is I am like ready to move I'm ready to get to California I am ready to get out of Kansas City I am ready to just like expand my horizons in that sort of way I'm ready to try out new forms of like putting my art out there and putting my personality out there posting more putting more content out there like I am ready just to completely open up and be myself and go

forth with my dreams because last time I was brave enough to do this oh it was addicting it was so addicting there was nothing better than it was so depressing at the time that's the thing with making hard decisions you're like actually this sucks but looking back you're like oh that was so cathartic i remember roommates in college horrible awful i was like i can't do it anymore nursing school is gonna fucking kill me and these girls i live with i like for my own mental health i have to go back home i have to completely drop out so i packed up all my things they were all in the kitchen talking i came out and i was like this past year has been the worst year of my entire fucking life and i'm leaving and you guys need to find somebody to fill this room thank you for

being my friends packed my shit up parents came got me moved home okay did not feel good did not feel good at the time but i knew it was what i needed guess what immediately got into art school immediately got a serving job immediately got to hang out with my friends who were in town who were coming into town making new friends in the places that I was indulging into my art and my creativity it was good it was so good at the time hardest decision of my entire life but I know it redirected me onto a path that I needed because I was brave enough to stand up and speak to what would make me live an honest life I felt at that point in time I was living a dishonest life I was around people who didn't like me. I was around professors who didn't fucking like me. I was

around everybody who didn't fucking like me because I was at a Catholic school and I smoked weed and wore juicy tracksuits. Like, of course they don't like me. They've never seen a bitch like me. I was doing fantastic in school. Okay. Top 1%. Thank you very much. But yeah, it just, it wasn't working. I felt like I was disconnected body and soul and it felt awkward. It felt wrong it felt dishonest it felt like i was going against who i was and i needed to do something i needed to do something i had to i was so miserable i was like fuck it what just make the hard decision and do it and i did and everything worked out perfectly fine amazing wonderful and i'm getting to that point again where it was like i made that hard decision i did the work i put in the work i

entered the phase of oh life is good I'm chilling but I've been chilling for a while now and I'm feeling that invigorating spirit of we need to make another big change now it's not something I'm going to make in a month it might be something I make after a year but I really am dedicating this year to kind of weeding out the unnecessary to setting myself up because I think when we use the word starting over or burning down our life or making a drastic change or choosing ourselves we think it has to be this big chaotic wild crazy decision that everything needs to change overnight that's how i thought when i was younger so i would just blow things up on a moment's notice and just like deal with the chaos and go forward listen you can do that it is mentally very challenging

I don't know if my sanity can handle it especially knowing how I handled it in the past with like substances and stuff it's like I don't need to go crazy and blow everything up I can strategically adjust here you know recalculate here oh I want to move to California okay save some fucking money bitch maybe fly out there a couple times visit some places see where you like to live visit the neighborhood oh you want to get into fine art okay challenge yourself make a hundred fucking paintings you know and then make those choices step after step after step so then it's not one big drastic change overnight and instead you're setting yourself up for success for a new life for a better life and for a more honest one if we're being honest there's something about the

new year that i think calls everybody to this big change the starting over it's fun it's a fun energy and only you can make it happen that's the one thing about hard decisions it's like fuck i just want people to choose it for me i want someone to make all the decisions for me and i want to be a little baby who sits here guess what that's not how it works and you're gonna be a little baby forever if you never make a choice for yourself like sometimes you just got to make those fucking choices and rip the band-aid off and go forth with what feels good and what feels right in your soul because those hard choices you'll look back in the future and go you know what it was hard but it was so cathartic and it was so nice and looking back at like 19

year old Hannah who decided to do that I'm like I know at the time it was like tumultuous but looking back I'm like thank god oh what a good feeling what a nice feeling to know I was brave enough to stand up for what I needed and to go forth without hesitation actually with a lot of hesitation but I like to think no hesitation speaking of goal setting and just looking towards the new year I feel like everybody makes these big long new year's lists which I'll be doing don't you worry and I'll share that with you all on next week's episode as we kind of focus on new year's eve a little bit more in the new year in general but I want to talk about goal setting and actually sticking to your goals because I was looking at my last year's list and I had some

fantastic goals on there like being in the best shape of your life and then never going to the gym all year so let's get real on how to set goals that you're actually going to achieve number one you need to set at least one goal that is something you can do every day and I'm not talking oh I need to go to the gym every day oh I need to eat the healthiest I've ever eaten every day this should not be a big lofty goal you want to know what my one easy like almost daily goal or at least weekly goal is for myself the one goal that I know I can achieve at the very least like every day or every other day give more compliments yeah yes hello easiest easiest goal to achieve ever I was like damn every time I give somebody a compliment I'm very genuine about it

but I'm like oh my god why don't I tell that girl her pants look nice why don't I say oh my god girl your hair is amazing why don't I tell that person your jacket is fab okay like your energy is everything why don't I do that I do do it sometimes but then also I'll catch myself like oh I just you know it's like fuck it what do we have to lose every time I get a compliment public i'm like oh thanks queen oh my goodness that's so sweet like every single time why would i hold myself back from giving a compliment so set one goal that not only is going to make yourself feel better make other people feel better and it's easy to achieve every single day maybe your one goal is like bitch i'm doing the dishes this year okay i'm doing the dishes this year i'm putting those

dishes in the dishwasher i'm taking them out when they're done i'm doing the dishes this year maybe it's every day every other day I'm gonna put aside five dollars to my savings account to my retirement fund I'm gonna try and drink more water oh you don't like vegetables I'm gonna try every single vegetable on the planet this year I'm gonna try it just one bite like something so simple seems so silly but we've talked about this before about building up momentum and building up that energy inside of us which then will turn into accomplishing bigger tasks with ease if you go straight into a big task it's gonna feel very daunting but if you have that energy and that momentum behind you that big task will be very achievable you have to have a goal that you know

you can achieve that you know you maybe already do you just need to do a little bit more that makes you feel good maybe make someone else feel good whatever it is you need a momentum goal one of them okay maybe it's for me it's like oh my god I read all the time but I want to commit to 10 pages a day maybe I don't read every day I read one book a month but maybe not every day i'm gonna commit to 10 pages at night every night okay if i miss a day uh it's whatever you know don't get too serious about your goals and i don't mean that in like uh they don't matter kind of way but also i've found that when i'm setting these goals especially last year if i fell off one day you know it's oh i need to go to the gym three times a week if i went to the

oh fuck life got in the way i forgot to go to the gym this week it's like well now i'm just never gonna go back to the gym don't take yourself too seriously give yourself room to be a human being to you know breathe a little bit we're all gonna have off weeks we're all gonna have moments where it's like i'm human okay i'm not an ai fucking robot although they want us to be at this fucking point i'm gonna get sick accidentally and i'm gonna have to take a week off here or maybe two weeks oh i'm going on vacation which means i'm not working out oh i'm doing this which means i'm not doing this it is what it is life gets in the way allow yourself to be human do not be too rigid in your goals i found that last year when i was like best shape of my life i'm going to the gym

five days a week even though i've never been to the gym and then i miss one and i'm like well i'm never going back no no okay start the small goal get the momentum going give yourself breathing room it's okay to be human it's important to be human but if you're too rigid with your goals it almost creates this like aversion in my head it creates an aversion where i'm like oh my god the list is getting longer it's getting more daunting and now i'm just gonna completely ignore the giant list going on in front of me or the giant task going on in front of me because it's easier to do that than face the thing also when it comes to setting lofty goals for the new year don't do more than three don't do more than three okay big I'm talking big goals okay you got big goals I love it

I love it all right but don't do more than three because then the list gets too long and like I said you start avoiding the things you gotta do for me personally I'm probably gonna set two big goals I've been on a gym kick so I'm gonna be like okay let's commit to two yoga sessions a week that's a big goal for me because I literally have not done that ever in my life so yeah also another big goal is like one painting a month that's not a lot okay it's not crazy but it's big enough that it feels like something that I can achieve I can accomplish and also I'm gonna have to put a little effort into it I'm still working on my goals list I'm still working on you know the ideas the things i'm trying to accomplish my wishes for the new year but i'm trying to keep it short and sweet

and easy and light and direct you have to remember we're human you have to remember there's mistakes you're gonna make don't make goals that you know you won't achieve simplify them it'll make your year so much easier honestly we talked about in the patreon episode um new year's eve so let's talk about it here i'm a big proponent of how you and okay so how i believe is not how you need to believe obviously i just am very into the woo woo of it all and i truly kind of prescribed the idea that how you celebrate new year's and how you celebrate your birthday is how you will go about the next year it's kind of a manifestation tool now if you have the worst new year's eve ever that's okay doesn't mean you're gonna have the worst year of your fucking life if you have the

worst birthday ever doesn't mean you're gonna have the worst birthday of your life i also uh prescribed the idea subscribe whatever it is that if you do have a bad birthday or new year's or whatever celebration you're just getting out the bad luck early okay so be thankful but i do kind of like to have the idea in my head that you should be intentional with your time and you should be intentional with the way you celebrate so when i celebrate new year's eve i really go about it the same way i would a manifestation tool so i celebrate how i want to manifest the next year so sometimes it's like party girl hannah i remember three years ago it's like i'm going to a burlesque show i'm wearing my shiniest miniskirt possible in my highest heels okay i'm getting on

stage for sure i'm singing singing lana at the top of my lungs i'm so fucking drunk ass out craziness falling over in the streets waking up with leaves in my hair was that year a mess yeah absolutely was it a lot of fun yeah absolutely next year okay flash forward i'm staying home okay i had my party here i was like i'm staying home yes new year's eve oh my god i'm home alone yeah sometimes that's how you want to celebrate sometimes it's like bitch i'm burnt out i want to be non-verbal on my couch with a bottle of wine and pizza all right i got dressed up i took some photos because that's all i care about i ordered myself a pizza in i put on a movie me and my cat snuggled up it was great it was quiet it was silent it was joyful that next year

peace peace on the world flash forward next year I'm like I liked the party aspect of that one year and how party it was but also I liked the aspect of the year before and how chill it was let me see if I can like cross over so we went out to a jazz club we spent a couple hours at the jazz club before new year's before it got super busy i think we got there like eight o'clock got our cocktails got close to the two and five canadians will hear the words you have cancer that's why every step and dollar raised matters on september 19th join thousands in toronto for the princess margaret cancer foundation walk challenge yourself friends and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research together we can carry the fire and help create a

world free from the fear of cancer register today at pmcfwalk.ca uh live music and we had a couple cocktails enjoyed our time cute sexy and then before midnight before it got crazy it started filling up in the bar and we're like let's go home let's run a bubble bath let's get some pizza there's something about pizza on new year's you just it just hits every single time pizza bottle of wine in the bubble bath enjoying my time resting relaxing great crossover guess what that next year fantastic mix of party and chill so however you go about it be intentional with your time and really think about hmm what do i need what am i trying to manifest i think with big holidays we feel a lot of pressure especially new year's eve where your friends are like we have to

party you need to get blackout drunk you need to go crazy and sometimes that's just not the vibe sometimes you're like actually i don't need that so if you're spending new year's eve alone or with your parents or in a chill environment it's okay don't stress yourself out do what you need to do focus on what you need to do maybe you need a little extra self-care a little tlc a little alone time that's fantastic sometimes that's just how it is and as long as you're giving yourself what you need go after it this year I'm in a party mood I'm not in a blackout rolling around in the streets waking up with leaves in my hair party mood like I was when I was 23 but I am in a party mood where I'm like I want to be in a sexy ass red dress obviously the color red looks good

on me duh Prada heels on manifested those just got those in the mail thank god I just need to learn how to walk in heels next massive fur coat joint in between my fingers glass of white wine or champagne sitting on a couch in a club that's all I want dancing here and there going and sitting back down puffing on my jay sipping my champagne chic elegant hot mysterious sexy wise that's what i'm going for and then i'll come home and cook myself a pizza in the oven that's just the one theme i can't i can't get the pizza out of my head it's not new year's eve if it's there's not pizza truly honestly we're trying to use food that's also fire but that's what i'm going for i want to dance with my friends i want to take some cute photos with some girls in the bathroom

i want to sit my ass on a dirty leather couch with a joint in my hand or a glass of champagne sexy red dress that's the vibe for my new year's eve because i'm hoping the next year is grown chic sexy elegant fun flirty and most importantly hot that's what i'm manifesting for my new year's so those are my new year's eve plans plan accordingly but like i said plan accordingly to your heart to what you need to what you desire bitch if you want to be inside non-verbal with a face mask on high as hell off a 20 milligram edible i can't blame you i can't because that sounds like a dream but also if you're like oh my god i have nobody to go out with and i want to go party go party everybody's gonna be out on new year's eve whatever you feel called to do is

important and it's what you should do whatever you feel like you need to manifest in your next year is important and you should go about whichever way you prefer doing so either way stay true to yourself have fun be hot be sexy and live your best life oh but with that being said I think I'm gonna leave you guys on that note that's some good energy as we go about through the rest of this year 2025 oh girl I am glad to see you go but I am excited to see what 2026 brings us I know I'm sorry for the short episode next week I'll make it up to you guys like I said my entire week is out of whack my entire schedule's out of whack thus i'm a little out of whack but we'll be back to regular regularly scheduled programming next week questionnaire is always up on sundays on my

instagram story instagram.com slash hannah marlene if you want to see what i'm up to see some silly videos see some cooking videos see some hot sexy photos from new year's that's the place to do so you can always submit your question there you can always dm it to me and if you're crazy which i love you you can go ahead and email me too like however you want to get to me you can find me another big new year's goal of mine is to vlog regularly every week if you want to see some past vlogs i've done they're on youtube at hannahmarlene444 and if you want to gift yourself the gift of smoke sesh a little more fun a little more spirituality journal prompts new moon full moon write-ups tarot readings extra episodes random mind dumps that i happen to post

those will be on the patreon patreon.com smoke sesh shawty i would love to have you there but with that being said merry christmas happy holidays and stay sane stay sexy and i'll see you all so soon.