Smoke Sesh - winter arc, crazy family & holiday survival guide

Episode Date: November 26, 2024

hello hotties and happy Tuesday! welcome back to the internets favorite smoke sesh, so happy to have you here! as the holidays approach we have a lottt to cover but first we go over the chaos ive been up to, car getting stolen, dealing with police, and on the more fun side of things meeting up with you guys and seeing wicked/gladiator 2 (we will go over mercury retrograde chaos next week so prepare) but with thanksgiving being this week I wanted to go over holiday survival guide and how to make it through the "most magical time of the year" especially when you have crazy family, holiday traditions and creating your own, we also talk what im thankful for! and I highly encourage you to make your own list to really take appreciation for what you have in life, big or small. we talk not having a big girl job and am I insecure about it? how to handle following your own path, how to build an outfit and a wardrobe, finals season and don't fail out of college! how to put in the hard work and stay motivated, in my winter arc, and how to actually transform yourself in the winter and how to behave as nature wants from us, breaking codependency in relationships, men hating women, most mg ive ever taken at one time, and sometimes less is more, what to do when you're in a break and how to stay focused, plus much much much muchhh more! if you want to call in DM me a voice message on instagram (hannahmarlene) and if you want to join the patreon come hang out! patreon.com/smokeseshshawty and we will chat soon! MUAH!

listen everybody needs a fairy godmother you know just somebody to look out for them some people call me their fairy smoke mother others their internet big sister but you can call me hannah the host of smoke sash so come hang out let's light up and talk everything there is to life the good the bad the ugly the embarrassing i've got a story for it all hello hotties of the world welcome back to the internet's number one smoke sesh my name is hannah your host and i am so excited to be back with you all again on this beautiful tuesday um sorry if my speaking is a little fucked up today i have the world's largest crater in my fucking mouth right now. Not to be dramatic but it is what I do best. I have like this crazy canker sore because

this past weekend has been just a little stressful. We'll get into it in a second and for some reason I've picked up this nasty habit of gnawing the inside of my cheeks when I'm asleep into a minced meat substance. So I have a crazy canker sore going on right now. Pro tip if you get awful canker dinosaurs kanka the the medicine it's basically like a liquid numbing bandage for your mouth crazy right thank god we have science but it is the only thing keeping me going at this point but yeah sorry if i'm like slurring a little bit i'm not drunk my mouth is just doing the best it can anyways let's get into what i've been up to this weekend i got this killer shirt i felt like it was perfect for um this episode if you're an audio listener it says ban mail podcast i am over

it i am tired stop giving men microphones that is the last thing they deserve in this life give more girls microphones also speaking of my microphone every time i post it everybody's like i thought you were holding a vibrator yeah girl that's on purpose i did fashion this microphone to basically look like a vibrator and i'm glad i'm getting my point across because every time everybody's like oh my god girl should you be posting that it's literally a microphone yes i should could you believe i was just raw posting my vibrator on my instagram story let's get real so this past week has been a little hectic um my boyfriend's car got stolen the patreon girlies know that um the day that i usually post our patreon episode on thursdays was the day it got

stolen so that episode came out a little later than usual thank you for staying patient with me girlies but we woke up we both had the day off i was like oh let me birds are chirping let me stretch my arms let me you know kiss my boyfriend good morning the trash was extra stinky so i was like babe get up go take the trash out then we'll have a good day he gets up he puts his clothes on like a good boy and he takes the trash out and he comes inside and he goes where the fuck's my car what do you mean where's your car what do you what do you mean where's your car it's out there you just you smoke too much weed you silly little boy your brain cells are really just you just fried them all i know your car's out there silly let me go look outside the night before i had parked

right behind him so i was like you know it's probably just right in front of my car i walk out into my balcony no car there there's no car no car we go outside we look around the block no car at all um where the fuck is his car it's gone it had been stolen bright and fucking early story is around 7 a.m from the camera footage we've gotten from our neighbors who are so incredibly kind thank you to you guys um and from what our other neighbors had saw 7 a.m a dark green challenger pulls up onto our street and basically from what we can tell if you have a push to start car or a car that has a key fob that uses like a bluetooth key fob one that you can essentially start from inside your house it is very common nowadays this is what the kia boys

were basically doing to be able to copy that signal and reprogram your car to only accept the new key that they have created so that's basically what they did dark green challenger which was also stolen pulls up two of these fucking crackheads get out of the car create a new key steal my boyfriend's car it is not a nice car i'm like you really stole this 2013 nissan ultima that's beat the fuck up like what are you thinking it had to have been just because it was easy to do but what the actual fuck and then they took off so i spent a majority of my weekend dealing with police reports filing getting information i figured i would just give you girls a heads up that if you do have a key fob or a push to start car this is now a very very common thing

um i really did not think i lived in an area i mean i live in a very busy area i live in westport if you guys don't know in kansas city it's like the main bar scene in kansas city very very busy but at least the neighborhood i live in it's very old school houses families living on my street like very chill neighborhood very historic neighborhood so i was like i don't think that would really happen around here but best believe gone in an instant it took them from the video cameras footage at least maybe 30 seconds for them to create a new key get into the car and get it out of our driveway and gone insane so if you're a girly and you need to be extra careful they have those bars that you can essentially put across your steering wheel that like locks your steering

wheel in place so even if they do get into your car they can't essentially take it I highly recommend getting one of those just to be extra safe I have friends who live up in the river market which is another pretty busy area lots of apartment complexes that young people live in and my friends are like yeah cars have been taken pretty consistently out of our parking garage like no one is safe make sure you're protecting yourself extra extra extra especially this holiday season when people are fiending for a little bit of extra money so pro tip there as we were dealing with that i actually did get to do some fun things i did have some highlights it wasn't all all bad this weekend first of all me and my girlfriends we went out and we did like a

double feature movie feature we usually do that every holiday season around thanksgiving last year it was the newest hunger games back-to-back salt burn i have not had a movie experience quite like salt burn in my entire life that was peak cinema movie experience it was absolutely bonkers wild insane everybody in the theater was just looking at each other like what the fuck is happening we had drank a bottle of wine in between the movie showing so we were off a bottle of wine and an edible watching salt burn raw in imax screening girl that was amazing this time around we saw wicked back-to-back gladiator 2 in between we went and got mexican food and drink a pitcher of margaritas so fantastic for seeing gladiator because like my god if i'm gonna watch men murder

each other for about two hours i need to be off a little bit of that drink but out of the two wicked was so good so good i've never seen the play i did not know anything about it i've only ever seen like the original wizard of oz but wicked was fantastic fantastic i was not expecting ariana to do as good as she did i thought i was gonna go see the movie and be like oh i'm watching ariana grande the whole entire time she ate that roll up whoever played elphaba did fantastic the singing was incredible i thought it was gonna be cheesy from like the cgi perspective i hate cgi i hate bad cgi if you're gonna do it do it well and they absolutely did it well it was fantastic i could have sat there for another three hours to watch the second half i could barely get

up to go for a bathroom break i didn't want to leave it was so good if you're looking for a good holiday movie to see please go see wicked um i am not a fan absolutely they have converted me after seeing the movie i got a call from my boyfriend that his car had been found oh my god like what it was gone for four days from us apparently they had taken it for a joyride and then dumped it in the community college next to me in their parking garage um so the security officer was like hey your car's here i know it's reported stolen but like come pick it up there's only a little bit of damages they did drill in the fucking handles i think they got locked out for some reason like his security system turned on randomly then the people who stole it got

locked out and they just had to dip so he does have his car back now if i'm being honest i thought it was never going to be seen again i've always assumed the worst you know because if something good happens then it's a nice little surprise if you just assume the worst usually things will go better than you expect you know so i'm like that car is never going to be found or if it is it's going to be totaled but no it was found all his stuff was inside of it i was really nervous about him losing like all of his skate stuff and all of our camping supplies and just like sentimental things that you happen to keep in your car but he was able to recover all of that so things are looking up the universe had to throw us a little bit of chaos pre-mercury retrograde to see if we

could fucking handle it and best believe we handled that shit okay we only lost our minds a little bit a little bit but we were able to handle it pretty pretty well and i think the universe gifted us in that way where it's like you know what you pass the test here's your car back also another really fun thing that i gotta do this weekend is i gotta meet up with one of you girlies um a local casey queen her instagram is kush collective lounge with a k kush with a k obviously collective with a k as well i'm following her on instagram so if you just look in my following you'll find her but her name's kat she is so talented and she actually makes custom vintage glassware bong pieces so she's like hey girl um if you want to meet up in person since i know you're in kc you know

skip the shipping rates like let's just meet up i'll bring you a couple of pieces and we can chat a little bit so we met up at the river market got some coffee met another one of you cuties with her at the coffee shop so it's so nice running into you and she gifted me the most beautiful piece ever let me show you guys i mentioned i was like you know pink's my color so if you happen to have anything pink and she pulled through it is this gorgeous wide base etched pink piece it also comes with a topper so you can kind of make it more of a decorative piece as well if you maybe don't want just bong sitting around your house so it has this really beautiful crystal topper but oh my god if you want to support go check out her page but shout out to kat thank you so much we're about

to smoke out of this in a second not only this but she also does candles so she gifted me okay wicked theme green and pink a massive massive beautiful candle it smells so good and last but not least she didn't have to do any of this i was not expecting any of this but she's so sweet a rolling tray as well thank you queen i love you endlessly the girlies who follow me are so fucking talented so shout out to you guys every time i run into you guys you're always a baddie you're always the sweetest you're always the kindest you're always like so giving and just like the best energy ever so thank you thank you thank you so much kush collective lounge if you want to go support her but with that being said let's hit this and let's get into all of your

guys's questions cheers that was the first time i've hit that and that is so smooth oh my god hey girl um first of all love you love the pod i've been listening since you literally started um i just have a question about how you stay sane and grounded in the upcoming winter months because as a wisconsin girly i find it really hard every year to stay grounded and not lose my fucking mind every winter um especially now with the um devastating election results i feel like it's going to be even harder for a lot of people um so if you have any tips or tricks would love to hear it love you girl love everybody that listens to this pod love you let's get into it because i've had some questions that are also very similar i don't know if the girls are struggling

this time of year but let me offer some peace and perspective now it is the week of a big holiday tis holiday season so let's just get that fucking conversation out of the way and let's talk about some crazy family how to handle it how to survive holiday season if it's maybe something that you're not particularly looking forward to also speaking of holiday season i will be uploading a thanksgiving leftover sandwich video talk about high food on my instagram this week and after thanksgiving i will be dropping some new merch i know very cute not really merch just things i've designed and really enjoy and actually use a lot so keep an eye out for that it will be available for holiday season pre-christmas if you want to get your girlies a gift show some love

um i will actually be dropping that next week so stay tuned for next episode and i will preview some of those things but let me tell you how my family holidays work to probably provide you just a little bit of solace on if you also have a dysfunctional family here's the thing i'm very thankful for family love my family fuck my immediate family fantastic mom dad great i mean a little crazy but they're both gemini's and i'm a gemini so i think i understand them but also they drive me a little more insane than usual brother fantastic sister-in-law love niece and nephew the sweetest angel babies on this entire planet now outside of that specifically on my dad's side of the family why is always it's always the dad's side of the family you know what

i mean even thinking about like me and my boyfriend if we get married it'll still be the dad's side of the family they're just a little crazy i mean love them no hate to my boyfriend's family my dad's side of the family a little wild a little wild very very very white okay i don't i literally don't know how else to describe it catholic straight edge they do a lot of drinking but they probably would look down on people who drink hello i don't know a little confusing in that sort of way very traditional family values wife stays at home and works and cooks and does whatever so yes best believe at the beginning of the season there is a group chat that is created with only the women of the family okay talking about what we're gonna cook and what we're gonna provide why the hell is

not one man in this conversation not one man i don't want to fucking cook i mean actually i love cooking but every holiday season especially for women growing up in these kinds of families like my god it is stressful no wonder you're drinking so much it's a lot of pressure okay I also feel like I'm having to save face a little bit it's like a performance piece if I look at it that way I don't lose my mind as much I feel like when I was younger I was always like well I should just be myself but everybody should accept me as who I am yes love that in an ideal world that would be amazing but also I don't like being judged so if I can avoid that and just save face a little bit show up not wear that crazy outfit maybe wear something a little bit more quote

unquote conservative and just protect my peace of mind that way fuck it you know I'll do it I see them maybe four times a year it is what it is that was a hard thing for me to accept because yeah family should be an unconditional base value of love I mean once again in an ideal world but I understand having crazy family that you're like how the fuck are we related and how the fuck do I even interact with you and communicate with you especially in the height of this political season where values may be a little bit more transparent than usual it's a little extra difficult but I have found that really taking the time to appreciate the family that I do appreciate show up in a positive aspect and also kind of like protect my mental health that

way by focusing on myself saves me a lot of emotional turmoil and stress you gotta set realistic expectations of what you can't expect that is the best way to kind of never be let down in life is to really just see things for how they are with clear eyes understand what the fuck is really in front of you and don't expect people to change and try to keep some emotional distance especially if you know maybe this relationship is a little bit strained and it's just simply there is no fixing it if you can also focus on the positive you know the family that you do enjoy the fact that you're all together the good fucking food try to focus on the positive qualities of family members and share some happy memories if you have them once again focusing on

yourself in this time instead of putting yourself aside and people pleasing and trying to appease everybody in your life it's simply not possible realizing what you can and can't do for your emotional well-being and also for like self-prioritization is key to survival take care of your physical and mental health by eating well sleeping well exercising routine focusing on you and what makes you feel stable in your everyday life i also feel like having a um an ally in a sense is really helpful whether it's a partner that random cousin uh your mom somebody in the family who it's like no we get each other like i at least i at least have one person to survive in this crazy atmosphere with stick together always have a buddy okay and if you don't have that and

you don't want to show up because you don't want to be alienated i don't blame you i don't think you have to completely put yourself aside in order to appease people holiday seasons are hard and if you're not going to intentionally see family because of trauma they've caused you or because it's too painful or maybe they just don't hold love for you at all girl i get it no one is blaming you sometimes you got to do what we have to do for ourselves also maybe you've lost family in that sort of way whether it's cutting them off or simply being alienated um i do think holidays can still be fun I don't think you have to completely lose yourself in the holiday seasons or ignore them because they're too painful when we are stuck in the past and we're stuck kind of

reliving something that simply we can't existed in the now it's always painful but if you can create new memories create new traditions create new perspectives of what the holidays are for you they can become a beautiful thing again I had such a hard time with the holidays in the past because I was like, it's just not like my childhood. It's not how I used to view it. It's not all rainbows and ornaments and glittering and Santa. It's not that. I lost the holidays. But then you have to create your own traditions. You got to create your own excitement. You got to redefine what the holidays are to you. And it doesn't have to be connected to the past. You can create a brand new holiday tradition, brand new view of the holiday. Maybe you only do Friendsgiving with

your chosen family maybe you kind of escape at the end of the night to go do your own thing to really just make it whole for you whatever brings you joy and fulfillment that is all that this fucking season is about focusing on what we're thankful for what we are mindful for why we do enjoy life I think that is so so so incredibly important if you have a hard time grasping this concept I have a holiday movie for you it is probably the best holiday movie ever my mom always forced me to watch it kind of like end of Thanksgiving beginning of Christmas season to really put things into perspective when I was younger I was like oh black and white movie like I don't fucking care I'm not gonna pay attention to this my media rotted brain but now after

re-watching it I'm like no wonder she wanted me to see this so bad it is so inspiring it's called it's a wonderful life oh my god it is so it's jaw dropping you'll be sobbing by the end it is such an inspirational movie and really just takes time to put things into perspective of like you can always find things to be thankful for sometimes you just have to open your eyes and really take appreciation for genuinely what you have stop comparing yourself stop putting yourself down there is always beautiful things in your life you just have to see them for what they are and it's a wonderful life is a amazing movie to really put that into perspective i love that movie talk about letterboxd top four girl this would absolutely be in there but yeah thanksgiving for me is really

all about getting so incredibly high and eating as much food as i possibly can drinking a little bit seeing family my brother will come into town so I'll get to see his family my sister-in-law my niece my nephew have a good time bring in some cheer in my life in that sort of way I love being around kids they really just put things into perspective for you and teach you once again that it is about the little things so yeah I am looking forward to it of course there is the chaos aspect that I simply cannot control so accepting it for what it is and going at it with the best possible mindset and positive attitude especially towards myself is key to survival this year I will be cooking green bean casserole and usually I do mac and cheese because

my mac and cheese is the best yes I said it it's basically the same recipe as teeny's mac and cheese uh if you have been seeing the tiktoks about her mac and cheese listen if you can't cook a recipe it's because you can't cook and I'm not blaming you but if it's the first time you cooked you're most likely gonna do something wrong that's okay it's still gonna taste fantastic don't worry about it but recipes are kind of silly in that sense where it's like sure it's correct measurements like down to a t but also like there's so much technique to it and a lot of it comes with practice so just get in there have a good time and try your best it's gonna taste good no matter what literally always but if you need a good mac and cheese recipe it's up on my instagram mine is

a french onion soup mac and cheese if you don't like french onions leave those bitches out just use the mac and cheese recipe but oof it is to die for but i'm making green bean casserole this year because that's my personal favorite dish um and i will also be bringing an appetizer so i'm making like a baked cranberry brie wrapped in puff pastry bring some crackers for dipping easy peasy love it probably like five bucks at the grocery store and yeah maybe a bottle of wine for my mom personally because she's hosting this year oof good luck girl i love you but yes happy holidays speaking of that let's talk about what i'm thankful for i am so thankful for you guys this community genuinely brings me such like such warmth and understanding and i am so so appreciative of

every single one of you guys here whether you've listened to it once or a thousand times if i have been able to provide you inspiration i'm so thankful for that i am so thankful for the reach that i do have since i was a little girl since i've always been struggling or felt alone i've always wanted a community of my own being able to have that here is just genuinely like talk about the grinch finally growing a heart like it makes me so incredibly happy especially this past weekend going through so much stress um and kind of lost in that sort of way even if it was just a little bit a little bit of chaos a lot of chaos um the patreon girlies came through provided me just so much reassurance and love and support and i am just wow this community is such a blessing to

this world and hopefully we are all able to show up not only for each other here but also maybe learn a thing or two so we can show up better in our own lives for the people that we do love so thank you thank you thank you thank you endlessly i'm thankful for my creative mind I'm thankful for being able to have fresh eyes to have the drive and the passion to want to do better I'm thankful for a stable job and people who do love me the people who show up for me I am so thankful for my my little kitty cat who moved in with me for providing me so much love and reassurance and understanding he is my bestie for life and I don't know what I would do without him i'm thankful for good food good weed good sex a loving partner who sees me and understands me and

shows up for me every single day whether he wants to or not whether i'm driving him fucking insane or not he is so loyal and so loving and so respectful and i am so thankful for him i'm thankful for a body that is strong for a soul that is strong for a mind that is strong i'm thankful for the values that i have that have been instilled with me i'm thankful for the education i've received for the books that i've read for the media that i've consumed that has provided me inspiration for the people before me that i've worked hard so i can learn something from them i am just so genuinely thankful and i think this is the most thankful i've ever been in my entire life as you can tell i don't know if it's the weed i don't know if it's the red bull i have been able

to gain this perspective especially being in hard times where i had zero to be thankful for by just keeping an open mind and always consistently wanting better and more for myself for my mind my body my spirit just genuinely wanting to create good for myself if i can do it even at my lowest points where i thought i deserved nothing i thought i shouldn't be here you can get to this mindset too you deserve it work hard for yourself show up for yourself you can do anything that you set your mind to always always that's the beautiful thing about life i think i tweeted the other day it's like sleeping peacefully knowing i have another chance tomorrow literally keep that in mind anyways that was a long holiday rant but i think especially

for the people who are like me who kind of go into survival mode i think we all can deserve a little bit of hope right now and hopefully i could have provided that for you today with that being said let's get into all of the other questions you guys have someone asked do you ever feel insecure about not having a quote-unquote big girl job um I used to a lot I used to a lot I think my fear of not fitting in is what drove me down paths that ultimately were just not the best for me not paths that I could succeed in I mean I could pass through them but I don't think they really helped me flourish and that was because of my people-pleasing tendencies and wanting to have something that I felt other people thought mattered even though if I did not give a fuck

about it at least someone else did and then I realized wow that is a really soulless way to live life and I've always really just gone against the grain I mean even if I was acting in tandem with it in my brain I was always fighting with that narrative and finally letting myself just be free and do whatever the fuck I wanted that really changed how things were going in my life I started thriving more I felt more confident I felt more secure and what I was doing and all of a sudden I did not give a fuck what anybody else thought so definitely when I was in that transition period of fighting off the whole like societal aspects of what they require from you and parental ideals and you know living up to family things once i gave up on all of that and really just

asked myself girl what the fuck do you want what do you want what what the hell is your heart telling you okay and i started following that kind of blindlessly but nonetheless following it i became so much more confident in myself and so much secure in the way i feel about myself i also got into the real world i also got into the real world okay and i started seeing that people outside of my bubble people outside of the like college rat race competition like people who were honestly living in the real fucking world a lot of those people find themselves in a situation and don't get themselves out of it especially like being in the restaurant industry seeing how many like full-grown adults 50 year olds were working in the restaurant industry but acting like they

were 16 the fear of not going after what my heart desired and driving myself down these avenues of success and what i desired it felt like i had no choice i was like girl we cannot be stuck here we cannot be stuck here for the rest of our life so i think it's really all about perspective and you know the more you listen from the heart the more you really don't give a fuck so no i don't really care that other people don't view my job as like a big girl job sorry i don't work for a corporation sorry i you know didn't choose the traditional path sorry for you for feeling sorry for me but also i'm happy i don't give a fuck i'm making really good money i am doing things that inspire me on the daily i'm more than just surviving i'm having a really good time

and I'm thriving more than the people who did choose that path who did do the rat race who are working for a company I am just at their level I just maybe don't have the bragging capabilities that they might have in a traditional sense of the big girl job sense but I'm doing something really cool and that I care more about that than anything else girl I just want to live life you know what I mean and no hate if you want to go down a traditional path that's what your heart calls you to, that's what the fuck you go after. But never, ever, ever let anybody else dictate the way your life should go. Never let anybody else write your story. You're in charge of that, babe. What's your process of picking an outfit? I never know where to start too many

clothes. So for me personally, I start with a statement piece. I love starting with a good piece that really calls out to me now the thing about like having a wardrobe is 80% of your wardrobe needs to be basics very simple basics and then like 20% needs to be statement pieces things that really sparkle that really shine that have that character but ultimately when you're putting on an outfit 80% of that outfit is going to be basics and then 20% of it is going to be statements so you want your closet to reflect the same way when I'm building an outfit I start with one statement piece whether it's like okay literally statement piece t-shirt and then working from there or maybe it's pants these are both kind of statement pieces I don't know in my

opinion leopard print is a neutral print to me to each their own but I started with this t-shirt and then I built around it if I was going out I would maybe also throw on my cheetah print fuzzy coat maybe I would throw on a leather jacket which is pretty much a basic still lets the t-shirt pop very simple shoes that are going to be not super flashy but match well um if i wanted to throw on a hat that would be also like a basic but always start with one statement piece and then work your way around it and if you can't build outfits it's probably because you have too many statement pieces this outfit would be crazy if i also had on like leather print pants and then like pink rhinestone boots and then a fuzzy blue jacket like it would just be overwhelming it would be too much

if you're a too much kind of girl go after it everybody has their own kind of way of building something but I think for the general public when it comes to building just simple everyday outfits it is 80% basics 20% statement start with the statement piece work your way around there with basics maybe you can throw on another statement piece that will kind of elevate it a little bit if you're feeling a little more out there you maybe you do all basics one day because you're just really not feeling it work with your mood too I think that really has a way of influencing how you build outfits and just the way you present yourself I mean you see me on this podcast last episode no makeup I randomly just threw my hair in braids and a headband threw on a comfy pair of

pants and a t-shirt and called it a day sometimes that's all I have time for really flowing in the feeling of your mood and leaning into that is the best way to really go about building outfits and confidently like showcasing yourself to the world failing all three of my community college classes right now help please oh no oh no okay i've been there i've been there and i've gotten back up okay i didn't flunk out of college when i left college i was probably the top one percent of my class both in nursing and in art school but the first year i was in nursing specifically the first year i was just in college in general i had a really hard time transitioning and a really hard time taking on all the responsibilities while also having freedom because i was kind of prioritizing

my freedom a little too much okay like freedom is great but girl you gotta pass that class i ended up having a pretty low gpa i mean not under a two or anything but low enough that the nursing dean was like girl we can't let you continue if you don't get these fucking grades up so when you hear that you have two options you either lay the fuck down and die and quit and give up on life and all this money you just spent on colleges which i don't recommend or you realize oh shit the universe saw i was struggling and called me the fuck out am i going to be brave and listen and stand the fuck up and get my shit together or am i going to give up i highly recommend getting your shit together because there are resources in place that want to see you succeed whether it's spiritual or

physical i guarantee there is energy out there that wants you to succeed most importantly it just has to be you so first of all what i would do is i would contact all your professors immediately immediately and apologize be like you know what this has been a really hard year for me no excuses though i think you can state you know that you've been struggling i don't think you need to write a five-page paragraph of what you've been struggling with I think it's okay to state you know obviously grade-wise this has been a hard class for me this has been a hard year for me I've just been struggling in general I have realized that maybe I need to put some more effort into this moment now is there any way that you can help me or maybe give me tips or maybe help me

configure to see what the best possible outcome of a grade is is there any way I can meet with you set up a office hours explain to them and also like ask them if you can work together to maybe set a game plan what do i need to do to get this grade up in this class what are ways that you have seen students in the past succeed in this class what are they doing you can ask your professors these things they should want to work with you if they have office hours babe that's literally for them to work with you now i don't think you can sit there and be like fix this for me give me the plan i think you should have a plan on your own but also it's okay to double check your plan with somebody who is especially writing the grades for you so I would do that I would then also if

you're going to lose your scholarship contact your there should be a financial advisor for you that you are assigned at your school if you don't think it's one contact your school counselor whoever's been assigned to you ask you if you have a financial aid officer and then talk to them be like hey I'm really struggling right now I understand my grades and my GPA are not where they need to be I want to make sure that I'm not going to lose my scholarship or if I am about to i want to let you know that i'm putting so much work and effort into this last portion of school if there's any way i can prove to you you know that i am deserving of a second chance please let me know i had to do that and they gave me another chance they gave me another semester to

get my grades up and i got that scholarship back immediately okay ask people for help ask people for help there are people who want to help you there are people whose jobs are they're literally being paid to help you seek their resources okay contact your teacher aid contact your friends be like girls get the fuck together i need to study i need to get this shit together go to the library for 12 fucking hours it's going to suck but good things are not easy if you want better for yourself you're going to be elbow deep in the fucking mud crawling your way out of the trenches it's not going to be skipping through a meadow picking flowers i promise you that so get the fuck up understand i deserve better i want better for myself and go the fuck after it okay i really

had to come to that mindset because i was like well yeah i guess i could lay down and die that would be the easy thing like why not just stop showing up completely and then i realized wow what a pussy ass thing to say like what i'm being such a bitch right now like are you kidding me you're just gonna give up you're just gonna give up that really like i had to gemini mindset i had to have that conversation with myself like girl this is lame of you like this is a little embarrassing you better get the fuck up and at least finish the fucking race okay and i guarantee you can finish strong i guarantee you can finish faster than you thought you could at the beginning so do your best seek out your resources that have been provided for you talk it through set a game

plan but do not lay the fuck down and die i didn't raise you that way starting to realize if there's one thing men have it's the audacity yeah yeah that's why i tell a lot of you guys here to start acting like a man like dead ass i think you need to realize that the world is at your fingertips men are just born with this innate nature of knowing that women are born with this feeling of like i owe something i don't know why i don't know why anyways i need you guys to start behaving like a man i need you guys to start realizing no this is my life i can do whatever the fuck i want literally women in men fields you know that hashtag on tiktok i mean not as evil please don't give yourself to the evil side but please understand like you do have a choice in things

that you can tell people to fuck off that you don't have to behave a certain way that you can go after whatever the fuck you want please develop the audacity practice it think about the worst man in your life and like not show up as him but get a little bit of that courage ask yourself like why did he feel okay to do those things and give yourself permission to do those things as well silly episode today i kind of loving it what a good vibe episode how to lock back in on the self-care grind I've fallen out pretty heavy it happens it happens I had a week a couple weeks ago where I was like I don't think I've brushed my hair in a couple days oof uh it gets that way it does life gets overwhelming emotions get overwhelming sometimes you fall off the bandwagon

but I want you to understand like that's a part of life it's going to happen and the sooner you realize that the easier it is to be able to get back on track the easier it will be for your brain to be like okay i guess i'll get up today you know and especially this winter season i think it's important to act in tandem with nature like all the trees are losing their leaves they're going inwards they are focusing focusing on self and preservation and rest the animals are doing so as well i feed the squirrels every day girl they are so fat they have developed so much fur they're preparing themselves for winter they're taking care of themselves they're rebuilding their nests that's what we need to be doing right now as well self-care during this time is a peak way

to really develop as a human and to ultimately come out in spring as your best self i am telling you right now it is time to get selfish i am giving you permission to be selfish this season look inwards take accountability for who you are ask yourself what do i like about myself what do i not like what do i want to change who would i want to become look at that dream version of yourself for the things that you've saved on pinterest and ask yourself how can i make this my daily life how can i integrate this into my life how can i be that girl i actually just wrote about this on patreon talking about having a winter arc i feel like that's such a male podcast term winter arc like i'm gonna turn evil over winter no that is not what's happening i just

want us all to have the time of self-preservation and self-development so we can come out in spring as a better more rounded hotter sexier version of ourself both mentally and physically so in my winter arc i have a couple tips for you guys first of all i think if you're really trying to take priority of your life start by making a list of all the areas in your life you might have neglected this past season if you've fallen off the self-care bandwagon ask yourself where have i kind of given up is it academics is it family is it career is it money is it friendship ask yourself why what is the roadblock you are facing in this area why did you stop is it because you just you know didn't have any motivation did you have any hardships come up have you just been not

thinking about it ask yourself why but specifically i want you to write down the areas in your life that you maybe want to improve on from each area write down three real actions you can take to elevate that area of your life to get back on track so maybe it's the self-care the wellness aspect maybe i'm going to work on eating healthier more whole foods maybe i'm going to focus on really having a self-care routine at the end of the day a good shower routine that makes me feel refreshed renewed working on the morning routine to make sure i'm getting all my vitamins my minerals brushing my teeth maybe it's money okay so i'm gonna focus on a setting a budget for myself getting realistic about how much money i make and getting realistic about how much money i spend

setting goals according to weekly spending monthly spending setting goals according to saving maybe it's family or friendship maybe i'm going to set goals of okay once a week i want to hang out with friends i need to reach out to this person who i haven't talked to in a while and let me plan one way that i can celebrate these friendships in my life write down three reasonable actions you can take and then every week or every two weeks set a goal to accomplish one of those things on your list now here's the part in which you do this how you find motivation i know most of you guys talk about phone addiction when you find yourself there scrolling endlessly on your phone and you have that realization of what the fuck am i doing i don't even want to be scrolling i'm just kind of

doing it because it's here but i'm bored like i need to do something with my life pick up this fucking list and do one of these things yes use that as motivation now you have no excuses when you find yourself in that moment pull up the fucking list and do something it will give you more purpose in your life than tiktok okay it will give you actually meaning to what life is to have a life to experience life and you will escape the holds that social media might have on you last but not least i do think you need a bare minimum routine you need a bare minimum that you do every single day or maybe every week something that you have in your daily weekly routine that keeps you on track even if you are doing the bare minimum there is no more doing nothing but at least

you can do the bare fucking minimum you know what i mean so my bare minimum routine would be like getting up at a decent time i mean sleeping in a little bit if i need it but getting up at a decent time brushing my teeth drinking water eating a good breakfast or a good meal to get me on the right track outfit i don't give a fuck about outfit wear whatever you need is comfortable that's not like a necessity in my life but maybe it is in yours is putting yourself together i at least brush my hair and do something with it doing my necessarily daily tasks of work feeding myself maybe starting some laundry if i'm feeling up to it and then having a good wind down routine of you know taking care of my body taking care of myself feeding myself doing my

daily stretches at least getting to the gym once a week maybe twice or three times by feeling up to it but bare minimum once the necessities that you need in your life to keep it on track that's your bare minimum routine because i get it it's okay when you have no motivation when you don't want to fucking do anything when you're suffering from something maybe physically mentally whatever it is the best thing you can do in that moment is at least do the bare minimum by doing this you will keep motivation rolling as you stick to your routines you will feel more in control of your routines you will feel more one with your life you won't feel like life is escaping you or you're missing out on anything because that motivation is continuing this is how i truly stay on track

this is how i don't fall off the wagon it does take self-discipline and it's going to you know ebb and flow and energy you're not always going to have the energy to act at a hundred percent I get that but riding the roller coaster of your emotions and of life and understanding that there are ups and downs will help you stay on track and help that motivation roll as well but I love you it happens I also think the best way to really jump start into that mindset is just to have a good little self-care moment in whatever ways that you enjoy self-care maybe you're a crazy person who loves the gym girl get into the gym fuck it maybe you like your physical self-care throw on a face mask and watch your favorite movie from childhood maybe take a bubble bath maybe you

really enjoy a good meal so you take a moment to cook yourself a really healthy delicious meal and just devour at the end of the night in front of a good youtube video like i don't know what your self-care is it's all valid but having that one teensy tiny little activity or routine that does bring you joy is a great way to jumpstart you into this mindset of handling the big ideas the big things in life but i love you tis the season okay like nature and the trees we need to also turn inwards during this time and take care of ourselves really focus on ourselves i think it's important i love your pod i hope your week's going good um how do you like be careful about being codependent with your significant other like what are some ways to feel independent when you do spend

a lot of time with someone anyways love you bye okay that was short and sweet um so I honestly just recommend I hate to say alone time we are both like alone kind of cats we love our time together absolutely but like I think we both get a little crazy if we spend too much time together because we like doing separate things and we feel like we're not fulfilling that side of ourself um when we're together not that we don't support it it's just like he likes to go skateboard i'm not gonna go skateboard with him sorry love you babe like go out on the streets and do your skateboarding things with your friends i don't care um also like i like to do art and simply just be alone sometimes and i unfortunately can't do that around him i mean i can do art

around him i guess but the alone thing is a little bit hard so we genuinely prioritize a individual growth in different areas that we may not be the same in like we really support and promote that individualness in each other and also we support alone time um doing our own hobbies being separate but yeah i think just supporting each other's individual qualities and making time to be alone is very important to break that codependency issue also if you have codependency really focus on like how you're spending time together elevate that time you're spending together so maybe if you don't spend a lot of time together it's at least the time you do spend together that's super romantic you're not just like on the couch every day on each other's phones

like completely ignoring each other it's like no let's take time to put our phones down to go out to dinner to share a bottle of wine to love each other in that sort of way or to go do an activity together you know go on a real fucking date so the time that we do spend together feels so so enthralling that we feel more confident spending time alone and spending time away from each other feel safer in that sort of way me my boyfriend are both like freaks codependent freaks too he's a scorpio so he's like in love in love i'm a gemini so when i'm in love i'm in love and like if i could be surgically attached to him i would but i understand like that's just not healthy it's not gonna promote our best individual qualities um the best it possibly can so giving space giving

time and having separate hobbies i think you should have hobbies in your relationship i think specifically you should have hobbies that don't include your partner in your relationship i think my parents relationship succeeded so well is because i mean they were both working in a school district but my dad loves coaching and he loves track he loves basketball so like he was always coaching sports and at practice until like eight or nine o'clock my mom was really involved in the school board and making sure that teachers were seen and heard and providing support in that sort of way she felt very passionate for the students and for the teachers so she was always there after school at meetings um showing up to school board meetings showing up for parents for teachers in

any sort of way possible so they weren't getting home until very very late the time they did spend together was like weekends if my dad didn't have practice or my mom didn't have something off and then obviously summer breaks but they didn't have a lot of time to spend together at the end of the day but the time they did spend together it's like as soon as they saw each other they greeted each other with a big hug they talked about their day and they did something together i think that really promoted their individuality i think it really helped that relationship keep that spark and to stay strong obviously I don't know their relationship fully but from what I viewed as a child it was very inspiring and I felt like I didn't have a lot in my past relationships because

I didn't have that kind of relationship until now now I see it for what it is now I see that individuality is important that codependency really keeps people from being themselves and that relationship should not be 50 50 it should be two whole people coming together at the end of the day to uplift and support each other the best that they possibly can and to not take those moments for granted also codependency in the past for me personally has been mostly influenced by the trust that i had for my partner if i felt like i had no trust for my partner then my codependency was at an all-time high i felt like i had to constantly be aware of what they were doing or worried about what they were doing because i had no trust for them i mean they

obviously gave me no reason to trust them I don't know why I did trust them probably because of the manipulation but I think it's important to ask yourself in a relationship is my codependency caused by a fear of not being with them or is it caused by a fear of them not being with me you know what I mean you got to have trust for your partner it really really helps with the codependency problem it's so funny I think humans really think we are other than or like we're not a part of nature but we are as natural as the animals themselves we're nothing different than the animals i don't know why we think we're this exclusive being i mean of course i mean we kind of are but like let's not get an ego about it we are still fucking animals we're still from nature

from this earth so why do we run away from it there are lessons here to be learned and things that the earth and nature that can teach us and i think listening to those things and really getting real about it has such a grounding quality and has such a healing quality so if you're feeling like overwhelmed and you need a fucking day and you need to focus on yourself yeah it's because you do need to nature is telling you tis the season it's the time of the year where we need to be looking inwards i was talking about this with my boyfriend the other day like why do humans think we're other than nature specifically in the ideals of like so many men think they're straight but like if you think about it there is not one animal out there that is 100% straight so why the

fuck do we think we are like most animals are gay as fuck if you think about it like that's normal to them a lot of animals have both kinds of sexual organs like hermaphrodites so they can you know work with what they got in nature it's a survival tactic why do we think we're different why do we put these ideals on us as if we're not a part of nature girl you're gay as fuck and it's okay so high i almost started talking out loud with no mic in my hand girl they can't hear you someone asked is it a red flag when men hate taylor swift um yeah i think it's a red flag when any man holds space in his heart for so much hatred towards a woman like what's wrong with you what's wrong with you that's actually insane and psycho what's wrong with you women i get it we've

been oppressed by men for such a long fucking time like go ahead you can hold space in your heart for hate but like a man unnecessarily hating a woman for nothing other than simply being a woman or being seen publicly often as a woman is crazy to me it's crazy and quite honestly mostly just misogynistic like there is no reason for you to hate that girl so much i know taylor swift never did anything publicly to you or to you personally so what is this real hate you actually have in your heart oh she's too much she's on my football too much girl i live in kansas city okay a chiefs is what runs this fucking city i go to a bar every single time there's a chiefs game on i watch that game i haven't seen her face at all like i don't know

what you are complaining about actually i do i think you just hate women and you can just be honest about it like i wish more men were forward about like you just hate women just say it out say it out loud just say it out loud okay because then most girls will know to get the fuck away from you god sorry this red bull has me worked up red bull truly does give you wings sponsor me you guys can send photos in the questionnaire i post on instagram every week i mean if you've never listened to this podcast it's the first podcast you're hearing i post the questionnaire for the week where i get all these questions on my on my instagram at hannah marlene i post it every sunday so if you want to hear your question or you want to um submit a call and i love hearing

your voice some some girl just sent a picture of her flexing in the gym mirror and you know what thank you queen you absolutely have massive biceps and i am genuinely impressed someone asked what's the strongest edible you've taken milligram wise um i don't actually have the math on it but if I were to guess in college to make money if you're a broke college student this is how I made money in college a I was befriending all of the student athletes who a had never had any time to do anything and b had a lot of money and no desire to do the things that they had to do so I wrote all of their student papers for them and the thing about writing papers for student athletes who um genuinely aren't trying in their classes is you just have to get like a low b like

they're pretty happy with a low b so i was writing student papers for like a hundred bucks a pop i think the most i made off a student paper was three hundred dollars and it was like a 10 page paper or something so if you can simply put sentences together in a concise matter sell papers okay write papers for people also not to indict myself it was a long time ago a long time ago uh i was making and selling edibles also to the student athletes which is pretty funny but i would say each brownie that i made had about say at least 100 milligrams so they weren't like potent potent but i was definitely like okay just take a bite or like cut it into fourths to eat the edible so i once ate a whole pan which is probably about eight

and I would say the edibles range from like 1 to 200 you know home cooked there is no preciseness to it at all so I at least ingested 800 to 1000 milligrams of THC and the walls were turning upside down yeah yeah I was basically standing upside down from what I could tell I was hallucinating i thought i literally thought i was standing up at the sink meticulously opening up my contact case gripping onto the walls barely taking out my contacts and putting them into my contact case and somehow stumbling and managing to find the bed again and lay down no that didn't happen at all i took my contacts out and put them on the pillow next to me yeah yeah that's why i'm a big proponent of like more is not always better especially when it comes to your substances

please learn rationing right now i love my little 10 or less edible like i don't want to be so uncomfortably high the walls are spinning babe and you can make it a competition whatever you want like i am just not a size queen kind of girl i am not a high milligram edible kind of girl i like to enjoy my time here on earth and listen i've done my duties i've tried everything and yeah that's why i i don't really even take edibles that much but if i am it's like 10 or less speaking of substances and another great movie someone asked thoughts on the substance i need hannah's review the substance was another great great movie i watched it with my boyfriend um about halfway in he looks at me specifically the scene where she's literally growing another

human out of her body and her spine is breaking in half and she's splitting in half yes it is body horror if you don't like body horror do not watch this movie a great commentary on just like being a woman fantastic movie fantastic movie i am in love with miss margaret but he looks over at me during that scene he goes i'm not feeling so good all of the blood was drained out of his face he was like about to pass out i'm like babe you can just say you can't handle the movie he doesn't really get that way it's just there's so many needles in the movie and just the bottery horror in general i'm like uh you could never be a woman i had to laugh though i was like poor things like it's just slumping over i'm like lol lol but yeah great movie if you need a um a

good horror watch this season hi hannah uh love the pod uh so i'm portuguese so please excuse my accent I will be switching majors I'm in uni and so I'll have to stop uni from for six months and I was wondering if you had any advice on what I should do during those six months because I want to make money and I want to work but I also want to learn and better myself and I would like some kind of flexible job so i can travel maybe a little bit um yeah i guess that's it any advice i love you so much bye oh love you queen okay good to know that we all kind of go through the same problems no matter where we live see this is a very normal thing to go through especially with college nowadays where

they only offer certain courses during certain semesters so you do kind of have to wait or have a gap if you want to change majors it's okay don't lose all hope stay on track keep it pushing but if i were you i don't know what waitresses make where you are for me personally here in america the best way to have a very flexible job that does allow travel that does you know promote making more money than maybe an hourly wage is through tip based work so i love being a waitress especially if you're in college or you do need the flexibility and you're young it is a great way to make money and also network a little bit chit chat have a fun job while you're younger i also think when you're in a transition period whether it's three months six months maybe a week i think it's

important to really make a game plan and to look forward and tell yourself okay no this is what i'm gonna do this is my plan i'm taking six months and then when i once i reach this place i'm gonna to work hard. I'm going to get an internship. I have a plan ahead. So when you finish those six months, you do still have the motivation and the desire to persevere through that degree. Maybe it's researching and applying for different internships in your area. Maybe it's researching and applying for different opportunities or different maybe simple classes you can take in this time off. So it's not like you're stopping your studies. You are just diverting a little bit before you get back on track the best thing during a time of downtime and an in-between phase is to

have a plan and stick to the plan so you can keep that motivation and you don't get lost asking yourself well what am i doing maybe i'll change this path maybe i'll you know find a new path because i didn't make the one that i truly wanted clear enough know what you want know what your heart desires go after it but yeah when it comes to jobs i would say waitressing job tip-based job it'll offer a lot of flexibility and pretty good pay utilizing a job where you maybe talk to a lot of people and networking that way is fantastic continuing studies and maybe a different course maybe you just take one class that just genuinely interests you in these six months versus no classes or you get an internship during this time simply applying for internships making connections

that way or if you the jobs in your area do allow you to work in a field in which you're going to be studying soon apply for those jobs try them out see if you like them but most importantly have a plan keep your dream alive and follow that motivation anyways that is all the questions we have for today i know this episode was so so so fun thank you all so much for being here i had a great time as always with you all thank you for being my sesh partners for traveling through this silly little thing called life together hopefully we can provide a little peace for each other especially during this chaotic time very chaotic um i will update you on how thanksgiving goes next week i will also have new merch available for you guys um and much much much more we have

a mercury retrograde coming up we have a lot to talk about ladies and i want to hear from every single one of you we didn't have a lot of call-ins this week i want to hear your voice okay keep it concise get to the point i got you we can get through it together but i love hearing from your guys's voices and hearing what's on your mind if you want to submit your question i upload the questionnaire every sunday on my instagram at hannah marlene if you want your question answered every single week i answer all questions on the patreon for the patreon only podcast every single thursday i also upload a bunch of spiritual sunday tips i upload monday manifestations we do a bunch of astrology work on there general just motivational advice and questions that can be answered more

thoroughly over on the patreon patreon.com smoke slash shawty but you guys know where to find me i love you all so so so very much let's smoke one for the road and i will let you guys go cheers my girlies stay sane this holiday season create your own memories okay you are in control of your own narrative and every day we wake up we have another chance to start anew so you are never lost you can always find yourself again um and create whatever you want from this life we are the narrators of our own universe and i want you to have that audacity and to go after everything your heart desires you are truly deserving of it all thank you thank you thank you thank you for being here

thank you for being you stay sexy stay sane and i will see you all next week