Smoke Sesh - young 20's advice, manifestation & spring ins and outs (video episode)

Episode Date: February 23, 2024

Hello hotties so very sorry for the delay but we're back! Happy Friday I hope you all enjoy today's video episode, remember to get outside, eat a good meal and take care of yourself this weekend. With that being said we really jump right into questions and talk about hoodies + the creative process, getting outside! crush psychosis, rose colored glasses, casual hookups, celibacy, spring ins & outs, favorite products right now, sticking to routine, chaos queen, chronic overthinker, manifestation techniques and scripting your life, makeup tips, Taylor swift hate, my Taylor swift run in story, billionaires, how to apologize when you’re the crazy one, controversial conspiracies, birthdays, do my friends hate me? Choosing peace & assuming good things, saying sorry, disrespect & fighting, living your best life as a young 20 year old, confidence & comparison, jealousy and building yourself up, being yourself, and much much much much more!! To get your hands on a hoodie and see what im up to follow the instagram instagram.com/hannahmarlene and if you want more fun content feel free to follow at patreon.com/smokeseshshawty love you all so very much and chat soon! MUAH

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others their internet big sister, but you can call me Hannah, the host of Smoke Sash. So come hang out. Let's light up and talk everything there is to life. The good, the bad, the ugly, the embarrassing. I've got a story for it all. oh my god you guys welcome back to another cute little amazing episode of smoke sesh so excited to be back with you guys um hanging out lighting up having a good time we got a new little angle here for you guys um i moved my living room a lot around a little bit and i was like you know what i kind of like this chair here i like the vibe i like the sunlight i got my little poster my little pink

got my little plant how cute um this chair will probably be back in front of the fireplace next week so don't worry if that's your favorite thing to watch apologies listen a little change is necessary sometimes but i hope you guys have been having a wonderful week i hope it's been treating you well I hope you've been enjoying life and getting outside and oh my god um I it's so funny when you put things into the universe um the universe is like okay we'll do it bitch you said you were gonna do it so why are we not doing it so funny how she's like I'm gonna make it happen for you you said you wanted it let's make it happen um because I've talked about this before but one of my spring goals was to really go on more walks to be outside more um

I just wanted to kind of take advantage of the warm weather and nature and fresh air um and I put that out into the universe and then my parents were like oh yeah you're watching the house and or a dog and then I was going on about three hour walks every single day because I would take her on an hour walk in the morning hour walk afternoon hour walk in the evening whenever I get off work like the universe said oh you want to go on walks okay we'll make sure that happens we're gonna make sure that happens for you so thank you universe for being on my side um I did that i did that was it hard yes but also was it kind of the necessary necessary push start i needed to start doing that more often yes because i um they got home they got home tuesday the monday

night so i haven't watched her for two days which means i have not gone on a walk in two days and my body is stir crazy i'm like i need to get out of this fucking house i need to get outside it's bright and sunny out i need to be out there with the people um so that was a necessary change i needed in my life thank you universe for directly manifesting that um i must be so powerful amazing beautiful um but i've really been craving a walk recently so happy thursday it's sunny it's bright it's beautiful roll yourself a little joint get outside that's your one piece of homework for today if it's nice if it's 45 degrees you know bundle up the sunshine will help you keep warm i am hoping you guys like these new hoodies i went through about four or five different iterations

of this hoodie um i tried it oh my god i can't spread it out anyways it says i put the hot inside psychotic these are the new hoodies I am dropping not me already planning the next hoodie too but these are the new hoodies I'm going to be adding to the website along with a small little update on the got weed baby tees I wore last week I'm hoping to do a full restock keep them in stock up on 420 along with a new hoodie and I just like making fun shirts and fun things because this is something that i have wanted i have been wanting like a fun graphic black hoodie and i couldn't find one so babes you gotta make it happen when you want it you gotta make it happen and they say i put the hot and psychotic they're so cute they're so comfy and perfect for letting the

people know for getting outside for going on a walk for a girl's trip perhaps um i just love a cute little fun funky tea even my manager at work was like I need one of those that is adorable that's hilarious um but yeah I have so many more fun things planned one of the big goals I've had as a creative speaking of wanting things to happen and making them a reality I have always wanted to like make things and not sell them that's not really something that I I mean of course would love to but that's not like why i'm doing these things i think a lot of people do things as a cash grab um but i have really wanted to as a creative adult is to not only put things out into the world that i enjoy whether it's a art piece an art performance i feel like this podcast is an art

performance in a sense you know literally i'm recording myself once a week for the past three years and I'll probably be doing this for forever like so much content of me will be out there and will be existing forever which is so interesting because I've been able to see myself grow through this and now that it's through a visual aspect will be so interesting from like a performance art stand um like understanding oh not my art school like nerdiness coming out but I've also wanted to just work on kind of like a brand and not my brand personally i'm not worried about my identity but more so like a well-rounded understanding of like a brand i've always thought brands were so interesting i love a ceo girl boss i think that is so interesting to me

whether it's like a fine artist who makes a brand out of her um huge amazing paintings or performance artists or maybe just like a brand as in somebody you shop through um i just find that stuff so interesting and always have so it's been a big goal of mine and i will always keep making fun things for you guys to enjoy and for you guys to wear or use or utilize um because it's something that i have always wanted to do and i'm making this for myself so hopefully that love translates and not only will i love it but you will love it as well but these were just something fun and silly that i wanted to create um i've been working on this since probably october i know you're like girl it took you that long to put lettering on a hoodie but it's like i gotta find the perfect

hoodie i gotta find the perfect font the perfect color the perfect applique um and it is all a process so we finally made it here and i will be rocking this all spring um but yeah i love you guys these will be up on friday um coming up very soon but i hope you guys enjoy i hope you can have a little giggle about how crazy we are um along with me because listen what's it all for if we can't have a little laugh. Am I right? Am I right? Anyways, with that being said, talk about manifestation. Let's get into some questions. How to escape dick psychosis. Very real, very real phenomenon um talked about this last week dick psychosis is literally just you being too infatuated with somebody simply because they fucked you good real phenomenon a lot of losers

can fuck well unfortunately and you get attached really quickly people who say sex is just surface level sex is just oh it means nothing blah blah blah like casual sex realness you know you can go out there have fun be safe okay um but people who are like oh i don't feel anything from sex i'm like i'm scared i'm scared right now what do you mean sex is all feeling okay so of course if someone dicks you down well you're going to attach feelings to them it's natural baby okay don't think too much about it natural process though you're physically connecting you're emotionally connecting you're feeling a little bit of love of course you're going to develop a slight bit of dick psychosis it's the best when you can develop it with a good man with a relationship with somebody

who loves and cares for you but it sucks when you develop dick psychosis for a loser okay that's when we start having some problems that's when the rose-colored glasses come on and you're like he's amazing and it's like girl he doesn't have a job he lives with his mom and he's 32 that's not from personal experience um thank god but yeah no um the only ways you kind of escape this psychosis in a sense is literally to a there's other fish in the sea babe okay you can always just go get a different dick you can always go just try a new one on for size if you really are like dealing with it so deeply to a man who you should not be connected to in any sort of sense go get connected to another one dare i say it there are other fish in the sea

there are other better fish in the sea find someone else who will maybe treat you right and dick you down well that's the perfect combo my god um also i think celibacy is a great option not this the option is going to very very fucking different directions it really just depends on how you approach situations and what is truly best for you okay but the craziest women and the most attached women I know are all celibate now they're all like I'm good I know how fucking insane I get and how quickly it happens and to save not only myself but also everybody else around me I'm just not going to affiliate myself with that like we just aren't going to get attached we're not gonna do any of that we're just gonna focus on ourselves

also a fantastic way of escaping that listen you're gonna have some withdrawals you're gonna have some dark times that's okay that's a part of breaking any sort of addiction especially a physical one but once you realize you can rely more on yourself than anybody else and you kind of build up that internal self-trust it takes a lot to break that and then you have to start thinking like is it worth breaking the celibacy over this man is he really that good do I really think he's gonna dick me down that good is he really taking care of me well and it makes you think through all those steps before you kind of just like oh fuck it you know jump right in makes you think through things a little bit more which especially if you find yourself getting

attached really quickly is good sometimes so okay someone asked what are my ins and outs for spring um okay inns lots of plants inns baby pink inns plaids i've been loving a plaid recently um in any sort of form um hopefully we can break out those bikinis soon but i feel like that's more of a summer thing i'm at least pulling my bikinis out of my closet and maybe looking at new ones shout out sydney mary bikini love her endlessly you want a bikini that is going to last you forever that's handmade that's worth the money that's one of a kind sydney mary bikinis i literally live all summer in my sydney mary bikinis and spring hopefully if it freaking warms up inns walks inns sparkling water green teas um what are my outs what are my outs i don't

know outs are I was about to say fur coats but I still love a fur coat outs is mob wife aesthetic just wear a fur coat in peace okay just no need to label it out mob wife aesthetic out honestly I feel like everything's in this spring I hate to say that but I think spring is all about renewal and getting to know yourself a little bit and unveiling the new version of yourself rebirth things are blooming okay so spring is a great time for everything to be in I'll probably have outs by summer but spring is all about like newness trying new things like put yourself out there girl go to that party go to that club go to that concert enjoy life um outs are nothing ins are everything um but yeah fresh bouquets white linens what else comes to mind like i want

to pull up my pinterest pic toasts fresh jam making your own jam that's an in um berry picking it's finally berry season babe so white tank tops no bras always yellow I think is a big in baking at home what else weddings are really in right now babies are really in right now that's scary everybody around me is getting pregnant I don't know what's in the air keep it away from me shout out to my girlies who are getting pregnant love you but universe hear me clearly when i say keep away my iud better be working overtime i paid good money for her she better do her work safe to say but for me personally out babies that's the only thing this spring oh someone said girl the mario badescu drying lotion yes and the bread

hair oil has changed my life i love you so much queen those are the two things i've really been using recently a because a week after my period i just start breaking out like crazy it's not the week before and it's not during it's like the week after so the best thing to do when you get like cystic acne or any sort of acne that you maybe want to pick out and touch is the mario badescu drying lotion i was anti mario badescu for a long time a long time but as a chronic acne girly i have to admit when i'm wrong and when something actually works for me and the star pimple patches listen great cute fun looks better but if you want something to really work and to dry up that pimple and to really get rid of it especially redness um and swelling the mario badescu drying

lotion is fantastic i'm pretty sure it's just calamine lotion calamine lotion so if you want you want a cheaper alternative just use that um but whatever is in that fantastic love and then the bread hair oil my hair's been really dry I've been straightening it a lot and it has been very sad um but I'm really just trying to not cut it and grow it out as long as I possibly can in for this spring I was gonna say long hair but I love a pixie cut you know not for me my head's way too big but love a pixie cut on the right girl you know what I mean so long hair in for me personally but oiling your hair so important especially if you use product a lot if you use heat the most universal hair oil that I think is good for any sort of occasion has

been the bread hair oil and it's great for all hair types tips for staying in your routine I can never stick to mine I've never been a routine girly help I I go through phases um the more stable I've become in life the more I've enjoyed my routine which is why I think there has to be some sort of correlation there you know the more I know what to expect you know keep things fun and have change but the more I know what to expect on a very simple daily level the more structured my life has become and the more I've been able to focus on the small things as well as the big things instead of just having to focus on one but I do love a chaos era I do have to say I love a chaos era when you just wake up and you're like I don't I have no clue what to do everything is an

option I I have so many options I have no idea what to do and I can do anything there's something so freeing about that that's how I lived from the ages of like 17 to 21 20 21 is when I finally was like okay girl but we were going through a pandemic I just got to college girl the world was my oyster there was so much to do I was getting stimulus checks every day I was like shit well what what do we want to do you know are we doing art what are we doing and there was some peace in that but then I had to return to the real world and I found out routine is very important especially for a brain that's an overthinker um if you're somebody who just gets it girl you're on the right path naturally you were born that way then maybe you don't need routine as much

but as a constant chaos queen I need routine I need to know what's coming as a overthinker and I think too much the less I can make myself think about the simple things the better so routine is important to me but if you feel like it'll be good to you you just can't stick to it I think you really got to start with the small things don't start big don't try and change your life overnight i mean you can if you're good at accomplishing big things i'm not um i gotta start small and do it one piece at a time until it's all done so start with one thing maybe it's like i'm gonna start with the way i wake up maybe that's too hard we'll do that last okay i'm gonna start with the way i go to bed i'm gonna start with what i do directly after work i'm gonna start with

implementing one new task to my weekly routine not even daily like just one thing to add into the week like start very small and then work your way up and soon you'll be able to stack all those little tasks all those little things up and be able to build your perfect routine um i do think a great way to start just without having to do anything kind of having to do something um our actual sunday journal prompts on the patreon were about kind of getting to know yourself and building that dream life um and a huge part of doing so and understanding where you want to go is scripting for me personally scripting is not only a manifestation technique but also a great way to kind of just check in with your brain and check in with your past self your present self and your

future self and understand where you want to go um but simple things such as um scripting what you want your perfect daily routine to look like from the time you wake up to the time you go to bed with as much detail as possible great manifestation tool great scripting technique um another great one is like um let's explore what your hobbies and weekly activities are of your dream self what would that look like what's the focus of your dream self where are you driven what successes and accomplishments do you have all writing this in extreme detail from a ideal version of your future self what do you want to accomplish in this new chapter of life who do you want to become what does she look like how does she dress and getting into as much detail as possible and allowing

yourself to dream a little bit especially during this Pisces season this is a great time to do it kicking off Pisces season talk about dreamers talk about manifestors just naturally scripting is a great tool of just understanding where you want to go so then you can build a game plan off of it and kind of just have more of an understanding of yourself I love scripting one of my favorite techniques and this can be in your notes app this can be in a journal this can be in your brain this can be talking out loud to yourself in the shower if you're crazy like me can look like anything just dedicate the time oh this is an interesting one someone said eyeliner tips you are serving um i don't have eyeliner on in this but i you've seen

my eyeliner in the past and my eyeliner skill comes from being a taylor swift fan starting at the ripe age of like eight or nine girl she was wearing this winged eyeliner from the beginning when you're a stan at a impressionable age you learn how to do that winged eyeliner and you learn quickly um i used to do my winged eyeliner in high school with the i would just have a thing to a mascara okay that i stole from my mom that she didn't know i was wearing i put my mascara on and then i would use the end of the tip of the brush that kind of had like leftover mascara residue to smudge the corner of my eye and then I would take my nail and I would and just cut it winged eyeliner like we were working with nothing so now that I've perfected it and I've become a

little bit particular um I think the best winged eyeliner is always in a dark brown I think black is a little bit too harsh um if you're going for like kind of a semi-natural vibe um if you want like that harsh black eyeliner girl go for it but for an everyday wear for me personally I just love a dark brown a light brown um and particularly the um brand that I use is hold on let me find it okay so this is so funny the way I just googled anime eyeliner it's this brand called heroin make h-e-r-o-i-n-e make and it is the um kiss me all capital one word smooth liquid eye eyeliner super keep waterproof i use o3 brown black it looks like this cute little blondie girl on there i think it's like 11 on amazon i bought my last tube it's like

a fabric or not fabric it's like a brush tip but it is rounded pretty well that the bristles never get out of place and it's not the fabric ones that tend to ball up um i have used this i think it's a um i think it's a japanese brand but i have been using this for a year and i'm about to buy my next tube like it has not run out the bristles have not broken um it is fantastic it is the best eyeliner but yeah being a taylor swift stan from a young age i learned eyeliner quick okay i learned it so quick also a lot of people hating on taylor swift right now listen i'm not like a stan like i'll rep her she's cool like i support i support valid because the things she has done and the way she's putting her money towards other people and the world and doing these performances

and working fucking hard is inspiring and I used to be a stan when I was younger um literally like obsessed went to so many tours the thing she does for young girls she read to her okay second time I've ever gone first time going to a concert alone ever in my entire life me my two best friends we went to the Taylor Swift concert my parents gifted me the tickets when I was like what I was probably like 12 I don't know sixth grade middle school um they can't afford a lot you know this is something that I really wanted and they got me tickets and my friends tickets and it was balcony seats I was just happy to fucking be there we got to the venue we were so cute in our little cowboy boots and curled hair um and this random man approached us and he's like hey can I talk to you guys and of

course immediately my brain's like no get away from me my parents taught me this don't try me get away from me and my dumb ass friend is like yeah yeah okay i'll follow you she started following him and i start panicking and my other friend starts panicking like girl what are you doing the man's like hey come here he's like i have front row tickets for you guys and we were like no no no this is like a candy in a van situation i don't want them he's like no literally like taylor blocks off half of the first of the front row the very first row and gives them away to people so they can experience front row without having to pay we got front row tickets to taylor swift talk about these tickets were probably three grand a piece three of them me

and my two best friends 12 years old front row at taylor swift she grabs my hand during love story sings to me we get guitar picks for free and she does that at every show that's fucking insane you're talking about emissions emissions valid i hear that but also bitch jeff bezos doesn't give a fuck about this country okay have you seen the sweatshops he's running have you seen the shit he's doing where is he giving back okay elon musk where the fuck is he giving back billionaire the most money in the world and he's just hoarding it hoarding it hoarding it just looking at us and basically saying fuck you buy more things dare i say at least she's adding to the community like at least she's doing something and i hate to say she's doing a lot because i mean

she's working but also like the hate that you have for taylor swift is simply because she's a woman i don't was i have not listened to a new album since after red like i had that experience as a swifty and i was like i just nothing will ever top that i'm good i've had the taylor swift experience i got a little dark little emo taylor swift just did not fit in with that that's okay valid but you can't deny that she's much better than some of the people around here okay and all the hate that is coming to her is simply because she's a woman and that frustrates me and i will always stand up for her in that sort of sense um the cultiness it's kind of a vibe not gonna lie like love when girls simply enjoy stuff like maybe it's not something i particularly enjoy

but is it something i'm gonna shit on no is she the worst of them out there not no is she the best yeah you know but there are way worse people can we put our anger into an actual billionaire who needs to do something like who needs to do something who needs to give back who needs to stop hoarding wealth let's be real taylor schliff's not the girl to be going after someone said how to apologize when you feel you may have dramatized the situation yeah i have definitely dramatized the situation a few times in my life okay um and the best thing to do whenever you are in that position where you finally you know the clouds part you realize oh shit i did not mean to do that i did not mean to throw that chair at him i did not mean to jump

out of a moving car i did not mean to go off on that person that hard the best thing you can do is to genuinely apologize sit down with them explain like i know you know i'm wrong but i need you to know that i know that i'm wrong and i'm sorry and i'm going to let you know and i'm going to take accountability and i'm going to do better and the promises i make i'm going to keep okay if i say i'm going to do better i'm actually going to do those things if i say i'm not going to behave in this way i'm actually going to do that thing um if i am genuinely sorry for something that means i'm going to learn from this situation but verbalizing that to somebody instead of just letting it pass over i'm being like get over it like i'm over it why do you care um shows that

you can take accountability for your life you are capable of change of understanding um and you truly want to be the best version of yourself for that person in your life that maybe had to go through that slightly traumatic emotional downfall you just had so yeah i say just apologize and sometimes when you apologize the first thing isn't gonna stick okay sometimes they're still going to hold a grudge if you truly love that person you're going to keep working at it being the best version you can be apologizing as many times as it possibly takes someone said what is your most controversial conspiracy i truly believe that the earth is flat i'm joking don't click off of this could you imagine if i was just on here like saying all

these things and then you're like wow she's so smart and then i turn around i look at you and i'm like no but the earth's flat and you just have to like rethink everything about me i definitely have had those experiences with some people in my life where like like wow they're great and they say some shit to me and i'm just like what the fuck did you just say you truly believe that why did i put any trust into you i don't really have any controversial conspiracy conspiracies okay i believe in facts and science oh someone said it was my birthday last week and I spent it listening to the pod I love you happiest of birthdays um I hope you had the best birthday ever I hope I was

able to make you laugh and giggle maybe do some introspection um but some of my favorite days that I have are also the days where I get to be a little parasocial with the people I follow and listen to a podcast and just immerse myself into like maybe just doing nothing sometimes those are the best days so if that's what your day was like and that's what you wanted i'm so happy for you i hope i could make you smile and laugh someone said sometimes i think my friends don't like me is it overthinking slash anxiety i like to say most of the time it is it is overthinking and anxiety usually when people don't like other people they don't keep surrounding themselves with those people does that make sense you know like that's the normal human fucking thing to do

I feel like that's the natural reaction is if you don't like somebody you don't have them around you um of course sometimes you have to interact with people you don't like but you don't bring them into your close friend circles you don't do any of that sort of thing um so find peace in that but also I have been caught in the crossfire where I was like oh no this person didn't like me but kept me around for some reason and why the fuck did I not realize sooner and I think the best thing you can do for your mental health is just assume they like you i mean of course assume it's overthinking until something it like shows itself to you um assume good things usually until the universe makes it clear and then take that sign for what it is and do what you need to do because

i got into a situation with some friends of mine back when i was in college um this is like the only time I've ever had a friendship breakup ever in my entire life like a dramatic one um most of my friends I have kept around me since we were babies like infant toddlers they've been like lifelong friends of mine I love developing friendship I love having friends um I love being a good friend to somebody it's something that I pride myself on um and just being able to have a good time with somebody so I like to think I'm a good friend but I found myself in a situation like this in college um where it was like I just kept you know assuming the best assuming the best assuming the best until it was made very clear um I was rooming with these girls and

the other girls were great but I think one of them maybe was the ringleader and looped them into um kind of like backstabbing me in a sort of sense I know you guys have heard this story before unless you're a new viewer um but I uh they um they essentially took what was supposed to be a really really important day for me and turned it upside down intentionally um and made sure I knew it was intentionally um and when that happened I was like okay you know I gave you the chance to do better I gave you peace of mind or I gave myself peace of mind I gave you an opportunity to kind of build this friendship back up and you just made it very clear to me that this was something that's not important to you and in fact you hurt me very deeply and you are not sorry

and as a friend unfortunately I need to remove myself from this equation for my own mental mental health and for everybody's quite frankly before I start losing my shit on everybody here um but 10 9 times out of 10 it's overthinking 9 times out of 10 you're just like why didn't they text me maybe i'm a little lonely maybe i'm taking it out on my friend um maybe they did something without me and i'm feeling a little uh put aside even though it wasn't that way at all i'm just overthinking a little bit or maybe i want to spend more time with them and i'm a little little jealous usually 9 times out of 10 it's i'm just overthinking the situation we're gonna hang out in a couple days and things are going to be great but there is that you know one out of ten

chance that maybe it is something a little deeper and I say have peace of mind give opportunity until it is made clear and once you get dogged over once someone fucks you over do not give them a second opportunity to do so of course I think apologies can be taken and people can't apologize for what they've done and people can't take accountability for what they've done and try to make change and I respect that and I will always always always offer an opportunity for that but if they do not seem sorry or interested in changing at all I say do what's best for you and remove yourself from the situation you deserve people around you that love you that support you that uplift you speaking of well not really speaking of this is funny someone said dump my

boyfriend at the end of November and currently living in Colorado heart emoji hand heart emoji happy vibes I love the random like messages I get when one of you guys finally break up with your boyfriend you're like I should have done that months ago I'm so happy like wow life is great like yes I love it I love it also I'm sorry I haven't done any call-ins recently it's because by the time I get to Collins I usually record Collins at the end and then edit them in wherever I feel like they go and my camera has been dying right when I'm about to record some Collins so I actually want to include a few more than usual today um see how many I can get to so let's get into a few of those and then maybe get back into some more questions hi Hannah my name's Savannah

I've been listening to you for about two years I'd say now I think you give really good advice on especially mental health um coming from a inpatient psych nurse of about two years now oh my god to you is I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year and a half now and we live together um when it comes to arguing he tends to escalate and yell and put me down in some instances and I've addressed this with him and told him you know it's not okay and I shouldn't have to deal with it and he takes accountability for it and says that you know he's going to do the things to change but my question to you is when should you take it at face value and see it as a red flag and a pattern or should you be more willing to you know see the growth and the change if they

decide to and when should you hang it up thanks love you bye okay not me getting the psych ward nurse stamp of approval okay um love you also thank you for all you do we need more nurses out there who are a little bit more um understanding to mental health crises um i think a lot of people going through mental health crises do not get the support that they deserve especially from some health care providers so i am so happy that you're working in that field and i hope you're brightening their day as much as you can um while also trying to stay sane yourself but when it comes to disrespect in a relationship is I used to tolerate a lot and now I don't tolerate it at all um kind of in the same way of like a bad friend where it's like if they show you who they are

you kind of give them less or you don't give them a lot of grace you know you get you get done wrong once you know you allow them an opportunity to apologize but if it keeps happening over and over and over again that's when you need to start thinking like hey is this somebody who can really stick to their word is this somebody I can trust is this a behavior I want to keep around me um and depending on what the disrespect is um like if he just kind of you know things get heated sometimes maybe a little yelling or maybe people go quiet like I understand difficult communication is gonna happen a little bit more often in relationships than not um whether it's friendship or personal but if he is saying rude disrespectful things if he is

putting you down if he is um kind of threatening you in that sort of way or disrespecting you in that sort of way i don't tolerate that whatsoever um as soon as you raise your voice to me actually that is disrespectful you need to watch your tone and i will say that i will because if you don't make it clear what you allow in your life and what you don't people are going to continually overstep that boundary so like if he's coming up to you disrespectfully and you're just letting it happen and then you're like that's not okay you can't do that again and then it keeps happening and happening that's you allowing it into your life but if you're like and I get a little dramatic in these situations because how dare you quite frankly why are you coming at me like that I have

never came at you in that sort of way ever in my entire life um but as soon as it happens you need to stop that train of thought you need to be like no you do not speak with me like that either you are leaving the situation calming down whatever it may be or i'm gonna get the fuck out of here sometimes you live together cool i'm going to for a drive i'm i don't care i will not tolerate that and the next time i leave it'll be with my fucking bags so watch your tone sometimes you gotta check people like that it's okay to get a little aggressive back it's okay to stand up for yourself but i do not tolerate just disrespect in a relationship at all i actually just saw a tiktok video where it was like this girl was in new orleans um celebrating um and she found this

drunk girl on the ground crying about her fiance left with a different girl to a bar like left her in the street drunk um and this girl's like girl get up give me your phone let me call your man like let let me help you out as a woman like you're down bad right now let's figure this out together um and she's like sobbing crying sobbing crying hoodie up the other girl's like calling her man like where are you let me figure out the street for you like doing the communication and as soon as that man finds that woman he comes up to her and he goes you dumb bitch and the woman just takes it she just allows that shit to happen whereas the other woman who's being protective over this woman is like no if you ever said shit to me like that you it would be a fight immediately

i do not tolerate disrespect with standing up for this woman and sometimes especially if you find yourself um to kind of you know take things too much sometimes you got to be that bad bitch picking yourself up out of the street and saying no i don't deserve this if no one's gonna stand up for me at least i can stand up for myself and i can make sure i settle for what is good for me you don't always have to rely on what's in front of you sometimes you can go after what is truly good for you and if you feel like you've been putting up with too much if you feel like he's going to consistently disrespect you if he says he's sorry but doesn't change his and doesn't actually do the work he needs to do he's not sorry he does not care fact of the matter i don't know how deep

it is you sound like a very sweet intelligent amazing girl um i don't know if you guys are arguing like that i just i have been that girl in the street crying so i know how overwhelming it can be i can know how draining it can be to constantly have to put up with that and to that i say stand up for yourself do it like don't get disrespectful back i feel like that's kind of stooping to their level but do not tolerate it cut that shit as soon as you hear it and make sure they're sticking to their word make sure when they are sorry they're actually sorry they're actually apologizing they're actually making change because if that's not happening they know that simply saying sorry is enough it's a little band-aid and they can keep doing that

behavior and that's not allowed here we don't allow that we don't tolerate disrespect also pro tip if a man ever gets angry and he punches a wall in front of you or break something or like physically shows his anger to something in front of you that is the biggest red flag in the world and you need to run because he's going to be doing that to you next this that's just like a safety tip that's not even like a oh like that's like a literal legit safety tip like if that ever happens to you as a woman if a man ever breaks something in front of you punches a wall any sort of thing like that get the fuck out of there immediately immediately at that point I don't like for my own safety i do not assume good ever anyways next hi hannah uh sorry if you can hear the plane

that's like fucking sounding like it's about to crash in my campus but anyways it's my 21st birthday today and we're having a really lovely day i'm gonna go out tonight to uh get a really big margarita the size of my head and i'm hoping to get so fucking sloppy that i don't want to wake up for class tomorrow but i just want to say i love you um you're such an inspiration to me and the rest of the beautiful girls that listen um i'm currently figuring my shit out mentally but you have helped me be able to self-regulate and understand my worth and I love you and yeah bye that was so cute happy 21st birthday I hope you got your marg in you deserve it I remember little 20 year old Hannah 21 year old Hannah ow my knees feel like I'm fucking 80

year old Hannah right now um I remember when I was young and crazy and listen you're probably doing better than me at 21 at 21 you're supposed to be a little insane a little like i don't know what the fuck's going on and i feel the chaos in the air and you're supposed to like embody it like it's okay to make mistakes at this stage it's okay to get a little too drunk every once in a while it's okay to have fun um that's a really fun age it is i just had no care in the world well i had way too many cares which in turn turned into no care in the world um it was also during the pandemic so I maybe was a little bit more free less free more free responsibility wise less free restriction wise as in you can't leave your house but it was a fun age um I just had so

much curiosity there's also so much wisdom inside of me um I started doing this at 21 um and there are just great things ahead of you you're gonna accomplish everything you want to accomplish just don't worry about it try everything have as much fun as you possibly can wear that cute going out top wear whatever you want express yourself however you want try as many new things as you can um that's the number one advice i give to anybody turning 21 is just take a hold of your life grasp onto it don't run away from it and try to do as much as you possibly can talk to everybody that you can make as many friends as you can fall in love fall out of love fuck love don't even pay attention to love like do whatever you want um because it won't last forever so take advantage

of course you gotta go to school you gotta do whatever you gotta do but like i miss being in school and having that be my only worry in the world um of course things start adding up don't get scared it's not that scary you'll figure it out along the way but for now focus on having fun happy birthday hi hannah so excited to be talking to you i just kind of wanted to discuss the subject of self-confidence and comparing yourself um i wouldn't say i have low self-confidence like i don't look in the mirror and like hate on myself or anything but it's more so i just think other girls are so pretty like whenever a girl walks into the room i just feel like i can really deeply appreciate her own unique beauty but then when I look in the mirror I just don't see anything like

I don't have a second thought about it I don't know I just don't appreciate my beauty in that way I can't see anything in that way like how I see it in other people so let me know your thoughts or tips thanks love you I love you and I actually love this question um this is something that I have dealt with for or I dealt with more so in my young 20s I'm pretty confident in who I am now and comfortable and who I am now one I do think it comes with time and simply getting to know yourself better getting to understand yourself better building trust in yourself as you grow and progress and that simply only comes with time I also think this confidence will develop when you realize another woman's beauty does not take away from your own um you can look at that

beautiful girl walking into the room and understand she is valid and beautiful and who she is but so are you you deserve to take up space you deserve to own space just as much as she does this isn't necessarily my fault i think this is a society fault like every time you pick up a people magazine it's who wore it better oh her at 20 versus her at 80 which girl looks prettier on the red carpet it and that's like a very unhealthy mindset to develop to always be in competition with other women um women are not in competition of each other we are always um allowed to take up space no matter who we are we are allowed to express ourselves no matter who we are all of that is valid so understand that you can appreciate something while also holding appreciation

for yourself there is room here for you too um i think with that mindset that really helped my relationship with um not only myself but also other women when i was younger and a little bit more insecure um especially when i was in my comparison mindset when i was always comparing oh me versus her what am i wearing what is she wearing what is how is she expressing herself oh i can't do that oh i don't have that body shape like who cares we're all different and that's what makes us beautiful um so appreciate that while also appreciating yourself um when you walk through an art museum you don't look at one painting and compare it to the one next to it no you appreciate this painting you walk to the next you appreciate that one you walk to the next you appreciate

they are all worthy of space you're all worthy of a frame you're all worthy of space at the art museum metaphorically but um when it comes to confidence and just like simply having that in yourself and building that within yourself um and being able to appreciate yourself the same way you appreciate maybe other women and their accomplishments and their beauty is understand that like of course we spend so much time with ourselves so it's easier to nitpick on the small things um and appreciating yourself and seeing the beauty in yourself might have to become a daily practice in order to kind of um retrain that state of thinking and retrain just being used to your body of course i think there is a there's some niceness and having comfortability in your body

and being used to it but also that can be a little scary and the overthinking can take a toll on you at some times so offer yourself some forgiveness forgiveness and grace in that sort of sense but also um when it comes to building it in yourself um i'm thinking back like on 21 year old Hannah again and I had like no idea who I was in the sense of like self-expression um and it made me be a little bit more critical internally because I wasn't pulling it off or you know like she wore it so why don't I look good or you know those like negative thought patterns of just comparison and that's because I was trying to be all these other people oh she wore it I need to wear it the exact same way she did oh she dyed her hair this color now I need to do it oh well

she pulled it off why can't I well she has that body shape why don't I and I had to stop the comparison mindset and I had to stop the wanting to be somebody other than myself and simply learn to be myself I think through kind of figuring out how I want to dress how I want to do my hair how I want to do my makeup, really honing in on the small things that bring me joy when it comes to appearance, really focusing on, especially with body, like a healthy way of moving it rather than a unhealthy way, such as not focusing on it, not moving my body, not connecting with my body to healthily connecting with my body through what is even like stretch or Pilates, just simple movement, going on a walk, healthily connecting to it in that

sort of way while also learning how to self-express that skyrocketed my confidence when I was trying to put it on a facade I was trying to be like all the other girls I was trying to see myself as a version of myself that I simply wasn't force myself into a box that I didn't fit in I felt the most uncomfortable the most insecure I look back on pictures of old Hannah and of course there is some personality in that in there but the way it's grown and blossom like I just like literally was looking at my old Instagram posts and the way it's grown and blossomed is so beautiful and I'm so excited about the person I've become today and I can't wait to grow up and be who I'm going to be in the future but I think that sense of security and that sense of self-development and figuring

out my identity simply came from inward perspective rather than outward perspective stop the comparison with other people and start the comparison with myself okay well this is who I was yesterday but who do I want to be tomorrow how do I want to develop tomorrow who do I want to become what is this next phase in my life gonna look like let's build some inspiration that I truly pull from that truly connects to me let's build a wardrobe that truly connects to me let's do my hair how I truly want it to look like really focusing on who I wanted to become and stopping the you know outside comparison of me versus other people and instead it's me versus who I can possibly become that's how I have kind of really developed my identity and my confidence

so fast you can really be anybody you want you can develop into any person you want you can do anything you set your mind to it really is all just about kind of how you go about it and I think from the most positive place is going to get you the furthest but also build trust in yourself building your identity within yourself and less so on the outward experience more so on the inward identity did that make any sort of sense the weed is really kicking in my brain is like she's like a river today she's going wherever she wants what should and should you not talk about on the first date oh save your traumas and stuff like that for the second third fourth date okay first date very surface level what do you want what do i want does it fit together do we have

any sort of chemistry here can we have a conversation do we have the same ideals that's what first dates are about can we have fun together okay can we share a laugh can you make me giggle can you make me feel good about myself give and take can we have a conversation maybe talk about um your childhood how you grew up um maybe talk about morals that you have maybe talk about what you want your future dating life to look like and you're probably like whoa hannah these are big topics like i can't bring that up on the first date which if he's scared of those questions on the first fucking date he's not taking you seriously he's not taking a relationship seriously so like if you want to take your relationship seriously and you want to build a real relationship

with people you're gonna have to have those conversations every once in a while believe it or not and the best way to really figure out what the fuck is going on if you have any compatibility and if you will even in the future or if this relationship is going to go anywhere you might as well just ask it on the first date second or third date then you can talk about like trauma here's how i'm crazy here's my past relationships like save those let's just rip the band-aid off let's figure out what the fuck you want with me and let's figure out if we have any chemistry here and if the sex will be good but anyways i love you guys so much i hope you've enjoyed this podcast i had a blast with you guys today remember to follow me on instagram at hannah

marlene to get a hoodie to see what i'm up to um and follow the patreon at or patreon.com slash smoke size shawty for any extra content if you want to hang out with me a little bit more i'll be posting a little bit more on there i think i'm gonna do a mukbang today so i'll let you know and i'll see you there thank you for submitting your questions thank you for being you i love you so much um and i will see you all next week hey hotties sorry for the audio jump scare editor hannah jumping up on here to give just to kind of complete some thoughts some sentences perhaps my god girl you know when you cry and it feels like you've cried out all of your brain cells as well you're just like empty-headed and pretty that's me right now anyways um i have had

a day safe to say um literally a day personally handed to me from god himself to test my will and strength to live and you know what we've made it out on top we are here thank you to the angel that works at apple and after on the phone after being on the phone with a man for four hours she answered the call and she simply told me well why don't you log out and log back in and that fixed every single one of my problems i hope you have an amazing day also another reason why i don't take advice from men because what do you mean i need to delete my whole computer and download some weird sketchy thing that you want me to download no i like her log out log back in anyways the whole point of this was me talking about the hoodie drops I believe hoodies will be dropping Saturday

morning that is the goal once again life does not always go as we plan or expect so follow the Instagram just to see when I post about them to have the link to be able to purchase there not only will I be dropping hoodies but I will be dropping a small limited restock of the rhinestone got weed baby tees I'm doing a full long-term restock of those in April so if you missed out don't worry there'll be more colors more of them but i have some left over and i wanted to list those as well i love you all so much thank you for supporting me i hope you have an amazing day pisces season let those emotions out have a cry if you need to don't let your emotions control you you will get through that problem i promise you you will come out on top anyways oh my patreon

girlies couldn't forget you love you so much oh my god did you guys see those hearts that's how much i love you i'll be doing a hoodie giveaway for my patreon girlies for all tiers for all the girlies i'll be doing a giveaway um sometime this weekend so if you want to apply for that as a part of the patreon come join us have some fun um and anyways yeah i love you have a great rest of your weekend i will see you on tuesday Thanks for watching!