Sober Motivation: Sharing Sobriety Stories - 15 Years Sober: Chris Takes Us Back To The Madness Of Addiction

Episode Date: May 28, 2025

In this episode of the Sober Motivation podcast, Chris shares his powerful journey to sobriety. Chris recounts memories from his childhood, dealing with an alcoholic father, and how high school brought its own set of challenges. He discusses his early drinking days, his deep dive into addiction during college, and the subsequent move to Los Angeles that intensified his struggle with alcoholism and drug use. Chris discusses his turning point, the life-changing experience in rehab, and his continuous journey in sobriety. -------- 30-Day Free Trial to Sober Motivation Community: https://sobermotivation.mn.co Sober City USA APP: https://www.sobercityusa.com/ Chris on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rosburgchris/  

Welcome back to season four of the Sober Motivation podcast. Join me, Brad, each week as my guests and I share incredible and powerful sorority stories. We're here to show sorority as possible, one story at a time. Let's go. In this episode of the podcast, we have Chris, who shares his powerful journey to sobriety. Chris recounts memories from his childhood dealing with an alcoholic father and how high school brought its own set of challenges. He discusses his early drinking days and his deep dive into addiction during college. and a subsequent move to Los Angeles that intensified his struggle with alcoholism and drug use.

Chris discusses his turning point, the life-changing experience in rehab, and his continuous journey and sobriety. And this is Chris's story on the Suburmotivation podcast. How's it going, everyone? Brad here. Thanks for checking out another episode here on the podcast. Great story coming right up with Chris. Before we get into it, I just want to mention that we're doing another 30-day trial for any Anybody new who wants to join the Subur Motivation community, it's an incredible place to get connected. Join some of our meetings. We have meetings every single day inside of the app, a bunch of different hosts, and getting connected with other people sharing.

The app runs 24-7 with everyone cheering each other on and just getting connected on that level and being around other people that are on the same journey of living a life, alcohol-free and thriving, really doing incredible, incredible things. Some people have been around the app for a couple of years, plugging into meetings, hosting meetings. We now have a speaker series as well where we have people that have maybe been on the podcast or that haven't that are coming into the community and sharing their story, answering your questions, helping out in any way that they can.

So if you want to check it out, the Subur Motivation Community, the app, everything, I'll drop the link down on the show notes below. Pick up and try out the 30-day free trial. And I hope to see you in a meeting soon. Now let's get to Chris's story. Welcome back to another episode of the Sober Motivation podcast. Today we've got my buddy Chris with us. Chris, how are you?

Doing great, Brad. Thanks for having me, man. How are you? Yeah, man, I'm well, dude. Glad we could connect and you don't have your story for everybody to check out. Yeah, thanks, man. So what were things like for you growing up? You know, I had a great, tell you what, I had a great childhood.

I had, you know, I have fond memories of, being raised by a wonderful mom and an alcoholic dad. The gene definitely runs deep in my family. But, you know, my mom covered for my dad and was over the top with love and kindness and gentleness and made sure all of our experiences and life were just, you know, wonderful. And so I have fond memories of growing up at a great childhood. Things, you know, things, by the time I got to high school, things took a turn for, took a turn for the worst. You know, my dad's, my dad's drinking and using was getting out of control. It was starting to affect, you know, his relationship with us and the family and the house became a little volatile. And so, you know, my mom gave him an ultimatum and said, you know, it's either us or that. And if it's us, you got to go away for a while, get some help. And, you know, here I am. A freshman in high school, you know, my body's changing. My life is changing all around me.

And I don't have my dad around. And my dad is, you know, in rehab, you know, getting help and trying to figure his deal out. And so, you know, high school for me was challenging. It was tough. You know, I would say probably those four years of developing into, you know, into manhood was just really challenging, Really challenging. I didn't like who I was. I didn't like how slow my body was developing. All the kids around me were getting bigger. All the kids around me's voices were changing quicker. And I was a late bloomer. And so obviously, you know, got put in the friend zone with every girl. You know, I was always the safe guy. I was always a safe bat man. Take Chris to the dance, man. He's not going to try to hook up with you. He's not going to try to make a move on you. He's the friend. He's the constant. friend. Yeah, that obviously, you know, beat my ego up a little bit growing up. But yeah, man, high school was tough. You know, my dad eventually came back from rehab and was sober and was working the deal that we do. And things got a little bit better. And but, you know, my high school was tough. I was, yeah, man, high school years were really challenging for me. Yeah. Well, thanks for

sharing all of that, too, man. Where did you grow up? I grew up in Cedar, Rapids, Iowa. Okay. Big graduating class there at your school? No, so I had a small graduating class, about 150 people. So, yeah, I went to Catholic school, and so it was a pretty tight community, pretty tight school. We were, yeah, we were a pretty close bunch of kids growing up. Yeah, well, yeah, at 120.

Yeah, everybody knew everybody. We all knew each other's families. We all knew each other's parents and, you know, it was kind of like, kind of like a nice way to grow up. Yeah. So do you find that was helpful as opposed to being able to slide into the background and maybe a bigger community or? You know, I find that it was helpful in the sense that I was a late bloomer for everything, right? So not only did it take my body years to grow into an adult, you know, I think I hit my gross spurt and hit, puberty by the time I was a senior, which definitely led to my, led to eventually my drinking, but also I feel like I was raised in a bubble, you know, that close-knit Catholic community.

We didn't have a lot of the peer pressures that some of the other kids, you know, outside our community had. And so I feel like I was a late bloomer in the sense that I didn't start really drinking until I was a junior or senior in high school. Yeah. So you did start drinking. in high school then? I did. Yeah. What's that like when you recall the memories there? Dude, I got hammered for the first time the summer between my junior and my senior year.

And I remember it so vividly. I was drinking ice house beers. You remember those ice house beers back in the day? They were like, they were the heavy, they were the heavy hitters, right? I think Ice House. No, I mean, we just drank like Paps Blue Ribbon and stuff. I mean, I wouldn't call it heavy, but it was in the price range. But, okay, Ice House.

It's OG. Those Paps, Paps Blue Ribbon, it's OG. I like that. Yeah, Ice House, man. I had, I think, eight of them. And I remember I was counting them because I wanted to feel different. I wanted to feel drunk. All my friends around me were, you know, experiencing what drinking was like and getting

their buzz on. on and I wanted to feel that that high. And I did it, man. But I overdid it from the first in the first time I got hammered. I overdid it. I blacked out. I passed out. Woke up in the morning. I was so proud that I had gotten drunk finally. And I wanted to do it again. And I wanted to do it quickly again. I loved it. I loved the feeling. I loved how it just numbed all my insecurities. It just numbed who I was. And it, it, made me feel like I was somebody different, the guy that I really wanted to be, you know? Yeah.

No, I can relate with a lot of that, too. I'll always remember the first time that I got drunk to. And it felt like one of the first times that I felt seen in my life. Like people noticed me. Yeah. Yeah. It was, yeah, and everything else melts away, right? But I'm with you too, man.

I hear a lot on the podcast, a lot of people share. Even from the first time, man, it was that, it was that to the extreme. right? And it was the same for me. My world, my world was spinning. And for a little bit after that, I was like, oh, never again, obviously. But then, you know, maybe 24 hours after that, I was like, man, we have to get back to making that possible. I wasn't really plugged in, you know. I wasn't really connected much before that point with the partiers and stuff. I wasn't like, quote unquote, cool or accepted at that level. But after that, I, you know, that was another thing, another sort of box that alcohol checked for me early on is now it was easily to be accepted into these other

groups, right? If you drank, you had this in common and it was just like open arms, right? Let's party. Where do you go with things from there? Man, isn't it, you know, isn't it funny that real quick, you know, you get off that initial high and people like us just, it only takes a quick 24 hours before you want to do it again. And, you know, I was, I mean, obsessed with it, you know, I, but again, I wasn't really, at the time, I was kind of like you, Brad, wasn't really plugged in and eventually got plugged in with that scene because I was now known as a guy who, who would drink and get hammered with, you know, my friends and senior year was okay.

I feel like every weekend we were dabbling with drinking, staying away from the hard stuff. I had some friends that were, you know, smoking weed. Stayed away from that. That wasn't really my thing. But by the time I got to college, I was looking back on my story, I was drinking alcoholically, you know, four, five nights a week in college. And again, drinking to blackout. There was no like, oh, let's go out and have a couple beers after a test or let's go have a couple beers for a happy hour. No, it was like, I want to be hanging from a ceiling fan somewhere within an hour, you know?

And so college, it got college, it started to get out of hand for sure. Yeah. And college too. And I mean, that's a very relatable story, I think, for people to. You go to college and especially somebody like me who is already uncomfortable in my own skin. You throw me into college where I think there was a lot of us that were. And this was, you know, our quote unquote solution to hang out. When I was in college too, I couldn't never really hang out with people.

It was like the start for me and that in a sense, too. All my relationships were starting to be centered by drinking and partying and all of that lifestyle stuff that we did at any point here, too, I mean, to the point of black and out and stuff, anybody mentioning anything to you or are you thinking anything too about, you know, I picked up speed pretty quick with this whole drinking thing or not really? No, that was the thing. That's what we did. I joined a fraternity and it was acceptable behavior drinking like that. But you know, to what you were saying earlier, man, there were a couple guys in my fraternity that didn't drink that got sober, you know, early on. And I have to tell you, sadly, you know, if I look back in the way I behave towards those folks, it's like disgusting. You know, I look down on those people like, oh, you don't party. What's wrong with you? You don't drink? What's wrong with you? And it took me getting sober to realize, you know, what a shit bag that that I was. And, you know, I'm there. I'm there. I judge somebody else for not drinking because now I'm all of a sudden a guy that doesn't drink and I certainly don't want anybody making fun of me for not drinking. But back in college, man, that was 100% acceptable behavior. You drink to blackout in my group, the guys I ran around with. Yeah. How did you do with your academics part of everything? I got through, man. I got through. I was a C student.

I was I was a C student at best, a C plus student. But I passed. I got my degree and that for me was all that mattered. I just, I went to school to party. I wanted the freedom and flexibility to do whatever I wanted. Yeah. And that's what you did. That's what I did, man.

That's why I did, Brad. Yeah. Any trouble for you though, man? That's when I started to get in trouble was with college and just struggling to keep it between the lines, right? Underage, too. Any trouble for you or no? Man, I don't, I don't remember getting in hardly any trouble. I mean, I got some minor in possessions and I got some minor infractions for drinking and doing things I shouldn't have been doing. But, you know, no major issues in college. It wasn't until I got out of college and started

dabbling with drugs that, that things took a turn for me. And I started to get in trouble. And, you know, really my life at that point was starting to just unravel. It was just, I just became obsessed with being effed up. Yeah. So what do you do after college? Do you start working? Yeah, man, I took a job in Kansas City. I went to Iowa State University.

So I was a cyclone and moved down the highway about three hours to Kansas City. because I was a small town kid growing up and wanted to experience the quote-unquote big city, you know, so Kansas City was like the closest one to us. And I took a job as an account executive at a newspaper selling advertising. And that's all we did was drink after work. And it's so funny now that I'm 40, I'm not 48, I'm 49. I'm 49 these days, man. And if I think back to when I was 22 right out of college, man, my body was in, I can stay out until three in the morning, dude, and get up at 8 o'clock and slay the day. I mean, it was like my hangover, no big deal. I could work with a hangover. I could work with bruises on my body and not think anything of it. And I mean, obviously, the older I get, you know, the more banged up I got. But I couldn't imagine, you know, drinking like that.

Nowadays. But anyways, I digress. Yeah, so I took a job at a newspaper down here. And that's when things started getting real, like real crazy for me. You know, going out every night, drinking. And then I started doing drugs. I dabbled with cocaine for the first time when I was 22. Yeah. And dude, I tell you what, man, I remember everything about that night. Everything. I remember what I was wearing. I remember what the weather was like. I remember what we were doing. I remember who I was with. And I remember thinking of myself, I'm in trouble. This cocaine business is going to be the death of me. Yeah. Were you drinking too? Yeah. That's always the thing. There's a lot of people that share too, like the alcohol is the trigger in one way or another for the cocaine use. A lot of

people share like if they're not drinking, they're not doing cocaine. I was the sad. That's the way I was for me. So you get introduced to this and it just hits just as much or more than the first time you drank. It hit more. Yeah. Yeah, that euphoric feeling, that sped up heart, that sped up, like just everything was just in 40, dude. It was just like coming at me. And dude, I loved it. I just, I wanted more of it. I could not stop. The problem was, I was, you know, I was new at it. So I didn't know anybody that had it.

And, you know, whenever it came out at a party, I was the first one to jump in. But I didn't know where to get it or how to get it. And so I, I, like, made the decision to move to L.A. when I was 24. So the decision to move to L.A. because the cocaine was there? You know, any easier or?

Wanted to live life. I wouldn't say that I wouldn't say I moved out there because the cocaine was there. I moved out to L.A. Because I wanted to live life. I wanted to be, I wanted to party. I wanted to live the life. And again, be free like I was when I first joined that fraternity,

away from my mom and dad and my, my siblings. Like, I wanted to experience something that Kansas City couldn't offer, right? And if that was drugs and rock and roll, then I was definitely open to it. And so, yeah, I moved out to L.A. when I was 24. And I lived out there for six years, man. And that's when it got my alcoholism and my addiction got out of control. I mean, 100% was, I was a mess. When you moved out there to L.A., thinking back to earlier in your story, too, where your dad went to rehab and get help in anything. Are you thinking about that at any point, too, about where things are headed for you? Is it just in that beginning stage? Yeah, dude, that's a great question. In the back of my mind, especially when I got out to L.A., and I knew my recreational habit had become overconsuming, overwhelming, right? I knew that eventually I was probably going to have to quit or take a problem.

breather or take a pause. I don't think I thought I'd ever end up in rehab, but as things progressed throughout those years, and especially when I couldn't sleep, you know, and I was up for all hours of the night, things progressed. I started thinking, yeah, maybe rehab is the place for me. Yeah. And that's at 24 or that's a little bit further down. That's a little bit down the road. Yeah. Yeah. Down the road. But you could, yeah, draw back on that experience. What's your family's reaction to you moving around and everything going on? Are they aware of anything or no? Yeah, my mom and dad knew that I was drinking excessively.

They didn't know about the drug use. They just thought I had a drinking problem. They kept the drug use from a lot of close friends and family. Yeah. So what do you do when you touch down in California? Get right after it. I mean, you know what I mean? Do you start working, though?

This is your newsday marketing or? Yeah, yeah. I had a job lined up outside. I had a job lined up in, in L.A. Started working for a newspaper out there and was back at it. I mean, back at it. Every night there was something to do. There was somewhere to go.

And yeah, man, it was I was living the life. It was a fun, a fun, you know, several years that I was out there. Yeah. Did things come crashing down at some point soon or did it at that time? a while yet. It took about four years. Yeah. Again, man, I was hitting it hard every night and, you know, towards the end of my stay in LA, I think I was probably 28, 29. I started, I got fired from a job. I had been at the job for 30 days. Showed up to work maybe 15 of the 30 days. The other 15 days I was still up, you know, trying to search for more party. I, that was the

first sign of maybe things are going south here. And so I became, I started to isolate a lot. I didn't want to be around people. I just wanted to be by myself and with drugs and alcohol. And started calling into work. I got another job. I started calling into work all the time and started showing up to work, you know, high from from the night before or from, you know, doing whatever on the way into work. And things just started to unravel pretty quickly for me. I thought that. it would be a good idea to move back to Kansas City because I remembered that in Kansas City, I couldn't find, I couldn't find drugs as often and as easy as I could out in L.A. And so I thought my problem was geographical. I'm sure, you know, you've heard that before.

Right. So I thought L.A. was my problem and not me. And so at 29, I moved back to Kansas City. And yeah, man, left it all behind in L.A. Yeah, that life, were you dating or have a lot of friendships and stuff? Or was it kind of party acquaintances? They were all party acquaintances. No significant friendships. They were all, you know, guys that I'd go out and drink and party with. And any relationship, romantic relationship I had with anyone lasted less than, you know,

a handful of months because my drinking and drug use got in the way. I mean, I just remember several times that, you know, girls that I was dating at the time said, look, it, like, I can't be with somebody that's going to, you know, drink and party like this. And I always chose the party. I always chose the party. It was such an easy decision for me at the time. Yeah. And then it can feel when you're in it, it just can feel so good, I think, sometimes, man. I reflect back to like my restaurant working days when we used to party and we had the, you know, the, the.

people and I would think to myself sometimes going to do that. I said, man, this is, this is just beautiful, right? You hit that part of the buzz, you know, before the crash or before, for me anyway, I couldn't control how much more I drank. So once I got to that little spot, I was like, oh, this thing is going to go one or two ways, blackout, disastrous. Or maybe I'll be able to coast it into the spot and just feel really bad tomorrow. But I hit that spot and say, oh, man, this is just so great. Look at all this. All my buds, all my pals, right? such a good time. And, you know, we did have so good times, man. But it would, I just always question when I look back, the authenticity of it. Yeah. Was this actually, was there anything actually there? And I'm like, I don't talk with any of those people anymore. Not because they're bad people.

But it's just naturally, I just, I don't know. I just don't. I think I saw in the moments we had a lot more in common and were closer. Maybe than, I don't know, maybe than we actually were. Yeah, that's, man, that's, I feel you and I hear you. And, you know, a lot of that, like, most of the conversations I remember having when I was out with my drinking buddies were the remember wins. Remember when we did that. Remember when we did that. Let's do that again. Remember it's about as deep as it ever went with some of those party guys, you know? And to your point about, you know, the good times, you know, one of my favorite things to do. when I was, you know, getting after it was, was blacking out and being told what I did in the morning. Love that, man. That feeling like, like, of getting started in the night and knowing that I was going to be blacked out at some point, that between the brown out and the blackout knowing that, like, I was going to do something.

It was going to be crazy. And I'm going to hear about it in the morning. I can't. I used to live for that. I love that, which is so reckless. I mean, it's such reckless thinking. know? Yeah, I just, yeah, I mean, you, yeah, I mean, I guess everybody's going to have a kind of a different experience too with that. Man, for me, it was the unpredictability of getting behind the

wheel or not getting behind the wheel. You know, for me, I was like, it was that, man. It wasn't a massively frequent experience that I went through, but there were times where I could have put a piece of paper in between me making it out of a situation alive and things could have went the other way, you know? So it was like, man, but I'm with you too. There were those times where it was just, I don't know, man, it was strangely celebrated too. Like even when I was in confidence in the tail end of it, like it was, and I loved it, man, because a guy with low self-esteem and no confidence and, you know, lacking maybe in all these areas of personal development. I mean, people thought I was fun to have around. But it wasn't fun to have around for things that I was

proud of, but it was almost like either don't have the social connection or kind of do a few things that are silly and maybe risky to have it. Connection, I think, to humans is so important. So I was willing to sort of risk my own well-being, you know, day after day just to have a place to maybe call home, you know? Yeah. You figure that out too. When you get sober, you look back on those moments and you're like, yeah, to your point earlier, was that really a authentic relationship or was I just in it to entertain my friends and be accepted? I felt that a lot. You know, I felt that a lot, especially early on with me, early on, the drinking when it was fun and it was exciting and you didn't know where the night was going to take you. I felt,

I felt like I belonged. I felt like I was that wild card that could bring something to the night that would make people laugh or would get people high on their spirits, you know, that was like my role when I was drinking, you know, but towards the end there, dude, I was isolating so bad that I didn't want to be around anybody because I started to get super weird too. I was like the weird guy, you know. The weird guy. You know, there's a lot of people too, right? It transforms into that.

And I think for a variety of different reasons, but it transforms into this isolation, right? We don't want somebody looking over our shoulder and checking what we're doing. And I mean, we don't want to share with anybody. You know what I mean? We just want to all to ourselves and do things the way we want to do it. That's the way I did anyway. I did towards the end. I didn't want people around counting drinks.

Like I hated going to buddies places. They were like come over for a beer. And, you know, these were like probably closer to normies than somebody that struggled with what I do. But they were just going too slow. And I'm like, boys, let's get it. Less chatter, more drinking guys. Yeah, yeah.

I just wanted to go up my own pace and I didn't want anybody keeping count, keeping track. And I sure as heck didn't want to hear anybody say anything about it. So that's where, you know, I can relate to that too. I mean, you know, I had a cocaine stretch too. And, you know, it was mostly going out in the bars and the bathrooms and blah, you know, all that sort of routine and spend all the kind of money. I lost jobs, man. I lost job because I used to work at restaurants.

That was my bread and butter, man. Oh, yeah. The ultimate line cook. A lot of it running through there. Yeah, go to the bathroom during a shift. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. 15 times.

Manager calls me, yeah, Brad, we need you to come in a little bit early tomorrow. I knew what that was about. I never showed up for that, you know, for that sit down, right? So, you know, erect havoc on my life for sure. And then, you know, I remember the last time I actually did cocaine. I was visiting with this girl. and their parents had this beach house right on the water there in North Carolina. And I had, I picked up some stuff and we were sitting out on the balcony of this

thing. And it all got wet from the moisture in the air. And I was just so upset with, because that's it, man. I mean, that was it for it. And yeah, that was the last time, man. And I was just like, yeah, I'm going to, you know, erase that. I filled in the gaps with other things. But that was the last time for that.

But it's interesting. You know what? That's so funny. you bring that up. I, okay, so my girlfriend at the time when I was in L.A. surprised me with a trip to Catalina Island. And, you know, we took a, I think we took a helicopter out there. It was like a birthday present or something. She went over the top on it. It was awesome. And I had a little bit of cocaine with me. And we get over there and we each do a little bit of it. And it's gone. It was just a little bit, right? We didn't bring enough. And dude, I remember being like stuck on this island.

And she had got this beautiful hotel and we were like doing the whole thing, right? And I was like coming out of my skin. Like where am I going to find cocaine? Like I am on this island. No one is around. I don't know anybody. I can't call anybody. And we went out to a couple bars.

And I like was trying to find drugs from random people that I thought looked like they partied. And I was asking random people if they had. had drug. I mean, that is crazy, man. But it consumed me. It's all I thought about it. And needless to say, we get back to L.A. and, you know, that girl left me, you know, rightfully so left me right away. But that was all I was focused on when I was over there. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. And it takes away our ability to even be present, right? Does that mean people share too with alcohol and everything, right even though we might be our body might be somewhere you know kid soccer game or maybe a

concert or a sporting event or family gathering if we're not drinking or we're not using it's like we're thinking about next time i'm going to be drinking or using you know it even removes us from those moments what's the turning point for you here chris good yeah man move back to kansas city and man i'll tell you a quick story about kansas city real quick and i'll talk i'll tell you about my turning point, right? So it's important because it's that you remember I said I thought I had a geographic problem, right? Well, I'd been flying back to Kansas City a few times to look at houses. I was going to buy a house because I thought that if I bought a house that would domesticate me, right? I would do Home Depot things on the weekends and I'd build fences and, you know,

fix the toilet and things like that, which by the way, there's not a handy man bone in my body, but I thought that maybe this would occupy my time, right? And I wouldn't drink and I want to party. So I closed on a house. The first week I was back in Kansas, closed on a house. It was a Friday afternoon. I went, signed the papers, picked up the keys to my house for the very first time. I'm on the way to open the door to my new house for the very first time.

First time homeowner, super pumped. I get a call from a friend, old friend, said, hey, man, I heard you back in town. And a bunch of guys are meeting out for happy hour. Why don't you join us? I'm like, I'm perfect, you know? Thinking of myself,

one drink is not going to hurt. And I haven't seen these guys that five years would love to catch up with them, right? And I went out, met those guys for a drink. And that drink turned into a six-day bender. And I was out on, I was out on the town for six whole days.

I didn't open the door to my new house for six freaking days, dude. That house sat making. I'm waiting for the new owner to come in and show it a little love. But dude, I was out partying. And so my geographic problem really, I mean, obviously it was me, but it's so funny, man. I thought I could lay low and hang in Kansas City, but I couldn't. And so anyways, yeah, the turning point for me, man, was it just got, it got more and more depressing. My life became unmanageable.

I got more and more isolated and became more and more weird. And I started praying. I started, the only thing I knew to do was to turn to God and ask him for help. And I did. And about six months before I got sober, I just started praying that God would find me to rehab. My prayer went like this. Dear God, help me find my way to rehab without hurting myself or hurting anyone else. get me the help that I need.

I was too big of a chicken to just walk into an AA meeting. I knew I needed rehab. I knew I needed a 30-day break. So he answered my prayer about six months later. We had a big weekend, man. I had a bunch of friends that were in town from college and elsewhere. And started on a Wednesday night. And I put everything in my body except for water and food.

and I was managing those highs for five days, and it came crashing down on that Sunday. And so Sunday afternoon, I was, you know, rushed to the hospital and began my detox there, dude. And I knew, I knew that was the answer to my prayer, you know. I knew in that moment that God was answering my prayer. I still today, 15 years later, get chills when I talk about that story because it was my God. moment. It was my aha burning bush moment, if you will. And at that point, I put my hands up in the air and I said, I can't do this anymore. And I knew that I'd be in rehab the next day. I just knew it. And, you know, my brothers showed up to the hospital and they said they had already called the rehab and they had a

bed for me and they dropped me off the very next day. And I haven't looked back since, dude. Wow, man. Thanks for sharing that, Chris. Yeah, man. Yeah, thanks. I mean, beautiful in one sense that It's the springboard to making the change. Were they surprised? You mentioned your brothers? You have two brothers? I've got three brothers. Three brothers.

Wow. Yeah, I'm the oldest of four. And so, yeah, my brothers and I are really tight. Yeah. They knew. No, though? Like where, they did know. Okay.

They knew that I was part. They knew that I was doing drugs. They knew that I was out of control. They, I think secretly everybody in my family was praying that I'd get help, you know? Yeah. Did you ever. try to get sober for stints throughout? The promises of, hey, God, if you put me to sleep for just a couple hours here so I can go

to work, I won't drink on Friday, or I won't drink this weekend, or I won't do drugs this weekend, I'll just drink beer, or I'm not going to drink vodka tonight, I'm just going to drink beer. All of those promises, I broke, you know, but that was the extent of trying to get sober. Yeah, just to try to, I don't know, a fancy word out there right now is like moderation, right? Try to do the, you know, try to just not go to where it sometimes does, right? Try to lessen the blow of things. Dude, there's not one moderation bone in my body.

When it comes to anything, right? Anything anything that remotely makes me feel different. Anything that makes me slightly feel happy, slightly makes me feel. slightly makes me feel energetic, I will abuse. I will take it to the next level. Well, you know, that's great, man. And you mentioned that too, like 15 years later. What do you remember from plugging into that rehab for 30 days?

Because I think there's a lot of people that go to rehab. And then it, you know, I don't want to say it works or it doesn't work. I'm not like a big believer on it works or doesn't work, but the seeds planted and we water it. Or the seeds planted and we don't water it afterwards to grow. So what made you continue to water after you leave? And what did you realize while you were there? Such a good question. I loved my experience at rehab.

I loved it. I eventually fell into admitting that I was an alcoholic, admitting that I was powerless, admitting that my life had become unmanageable. I could grasp those 12 steps. I could grasp the first three steps. That was easy for me because I started going to meetings in rehab and started listening to people tell my story, you know. And then I started seeing like super successful people tell my story in meetings.

And I'm like, damn, dude, that guy's like super like whatever. To me, it was very normalizing, you know, this problem is affecting like everybody, you know. It doesn't discriminate. Right. And plugging into the right kind of people was it for me. You know, I'm a big fellowship. The big part of my program is fellowship. Like I need to be around similar people. Like I need to be around people that I admire and I strive to be like. And, you know, they say look for the guys in the room that you want a piece of that you want something from that, that life that you want to aspire to. I was lucky. I found those guys early on. You know, and that helped me like tremendously, right? And I had that pink cloud too, dude. I was like a pink cloud guy, man. I remember this lady, she was probably, I mean, dude, she was probably 75 years old and she was still coming to meetings every day. And I shared that I was worried that this pink cloud, it was like 60 days or 90 days that I was sober. And I shared in the meeting that I like was worried about that pink cloud leaving because everybody says after about 90 days out of rehab, that pink cloud goes away. And this lady came up to me after the meeting. I'll never forget it, dude. She said, that pink cloud to remain over your head for as long as you wanted to. You get to choose every day. Dude, I'm like, seriously? Is that easy? That, like, for me at the time, that was

some profound shit. I'm like, okay, let's go. And I think for me, that pink cloud lasted for about a year. And again, you know, you ask about what helped me stay the course. My life just started getting better. Everything started getting better in my life, man. Finances, relationships, you know, work. I mean, everything just started to come together. And I was a big believer early on, man, the freaking 12-step programs work. Yeah, and be willing to plug in.

Dude, that is the biggest thing, man. I see guys that come in. I lead a meeting on Tuesday. nights and I see guys that come in and they leave right after the meeting. Yeah. They don't plug in, dude. And I'm like, man, why don't you come to dinner with us? Why don't you have coffee with us?

Come around. Come around more than just this hour that you're in the meeting. You got to plug in. Yeah. Yeah, I always look at that too. I mean, I used to work in a rehab for six years too. And we would, you know, you kind of have that too, man. It's like getting somebody to the point where they're comfortable to buy in to,

to invest in a sense, right? I always try to explain it to these guys as a savings account. Every time you go to a meeting, there's five bucks in your account. Every time you share, there's another five. Every time you talk, everything you do for your sobriety, you have a deposit. And then when shit hits the fan because it's going to, you actually have something to draw from. But if you don't do anything and then things get difficult, you have no friends to call, you have no connections. You haven't been practicing, reaching out.

You have nothing to lean back on. So it's, yeah, I remember too, man, my first meetings I went to. man, I came in late. I came in a little bit late, right? Sitting the last chair at the back. Yeah. And I was gone before the prayer. And I did.

And I was at the part of my journey where I had back problems, right? Everybody was on my back, so I wanted to get them off of it. And they would say, go to meetings. So I was like, yeah, guys, I went to meetings. But I didn't learn anything or get anything out of it. I wasn't applying myself to, you know, do anything. Right. So I think it's a good point that whatever it is that we do, it's like there's a difference.

between showing up and actually doing stuff that's going to help us out if that makes any sense it makes perfect sense yes that is such great advice it's one thing to show up great you're here now do something while you're here yeah you know share make a friend hold out of hand welcome somebody to the meeting yeah do something while you're here make it a value yeah are you that life that people like, come on, Chris. I don't want to go to dinner with Chris, man. Chauvel, me to agree that guy is. A coffee with Chris. Yeah. I'm pretty convincing, dude. I can persuade people to have a cup of Joe with me. You know, I'm pretty convincing, dude. I believe it. I mean, you mentioned, too, a lot of this stuff changes, you know, in life,

man. Let me know, I have this sort of thought to just conversations over the years with people, right? we have these expectations maybe in a sense getting sober, right, that all these areas of our life are going to change. And I notice talking with people that if they don't change on their timeline, it really makes it challenging for them to keep going. So my relationship doesn't get better and people don't trust me in X amount of days. I see them sliding back into the old ways because they haven't experienced sort of the growth or the benefits yet. What was that like for you as you go through it? because we do have to realize everybody has a different story they come into this with. But like I had relationships that for some, they would never be repaired.

I had some things finance wise, criminal record wise. It doesn't matter how many days sober I get. It ain't going away. But learning how to accept things. Like what was that like for you to maybe patience a little bit for things to catch up? Man, I struggle with patience. I struggle. I have zero patience. It's funny. I tell my kids all the time they need to work on their patients. And they're like, dad, you don't have any patience. I'm like, right. Damn it. But I am not

a patient person. I want everything done now and on my timeline. And, you know, somebody told me a long time ago when I first got sober is that the world doesn't work on your timeline. It works on God's timeline and God is never late. And that slogan or meditative piece right there really helped me early on that, okay, if this is supposed to happen today, it'll happen. If it's not, it might not be intended to happen or it just might happen at a different time. And so I became pretty good at working with that. But a specific example would be, I came out of rehab with a $100,000 credit card debt. And, you know, I put everything on my credit card for the past 10 years.

Dude, I was paying $1,200 a month in freaking interest, you know. And I just, I couldn't get ahead on that. And I came out of rehab destined to pay that thing off. And, you know, it was a slow go. It was slow to get there. but I finally got it paid off. And I'm very grateful that I was able to do that after a few years. And so, yeah, things started happening for me, but they weren't on my timeline, dude.

They were on gods. And learning how to be patient in that process, yeah. Yeah. But that's growth. I mean, that's like the way that we used to live, though, is everything right away, instant gratification, right? Change the way we're feeling right now. But the more and more we do that, the less and less,

we develop anything else that may be healthier, you know? Right. Anything that's going to help us. That's what I talk to a lot of people, too, who identify as gray area drinkers, right? Like in the spectrum, maybe more in the middle of the spectrum. It's like the longer we keep alcohol around, every time you're stressed, overwhelmed, something goes wrong, a relationship or a job. Every time we lean on alcohol, we lean less on meditation, community, support, therapy,

whatever else might help us to build in that direction and things. Heading towards wrapping up, man. Any words of wisdom, man, over 15 years? When was that Sunday that you went to the hospital? March 10th, 2010, dude. That was the day, man. That was my last day. So my sobriety dates March 10, man.

I'll tell you this. Here's my words of wisdom. And not that I have any wisdom. I'm just another, you know, alcoholic, drug addict that's trying to get by just for today, right? But this shit works, man. The program works. Admitting that you're powerless, admitting that your life is unmanageable, admitting that, you know, there's a higher power and that you're tapping into your higher power, whatever you call it, that stuff works.

And when you lean into that, your life gets exponential. eventually better month after month, the longer I stay sober. 100%. My life continues to get better every single month that I stay sober because I just follow other people. I'm a total copycat, dude. I'm a total leach in those meetings. I listen to what people say. And I don't do anything outstanding or anything significant. I just fall in mind and I try to be just another bump on the log. You know what I mean, dude? Yeah, I hear you on that 100%. Thank you for that.

Thank you for sharing your story. I wanted to mention too your project, man. Oh, yeah, man. Yeah. Share with us a little bit about that and the motivation here. Yeah, thanks for bringing that up to you. Yeah. So I created a mobile app called Sober City and that gives you a different sober slogan every day of every day of the year.

Right. So there's 365 different sober slogans. there is a daily reflection that goes along with it. There's a daily prompt. And then there's a lighten up piece. Right. So part of my sobriety has always, I've always found humor in my life and humor and what I do. And so I try to take a humorous spin on the daily slogan. Right. So you get a little bit of seriousness with the slogan. You get a daily prompt to tell you what to do. A lot of them are prayers, real short prayers of how to get dialed in closer to your higher power. And then there's a funny part that that kind of ties it all together. And so, you know, just real quick, when I was in rehab, my therapist said, hey, man, you really need to learn

these sober slogans. They help a lot of people stay sober. And then I got in the rooms and all these sober slogans were like hanging on the wall. And so I just really fell in love with the different meanings of these slogans. And so for the past couple years, I've been writing just reflections based on my experience, based on my 15 years of experience. And so what you have is 365 slogans and daily reflections based on, you know, based on my experience, strength, and hope, you know. And so it's available on the app store and the Google Play store. And it's super simple too. It's just a simple app. Gives you the meditation of the day. And it gives you a prayer of the day if you're into that, you know.

Yeah, beautiful Chris. Yeah, and it's actually, I mean, I've seen a lot of apps over the years, man, and like I told you too, it's beautiful, man. It's a well, we've worked together and got a nice flow to it. Thanks, dude. A couple people I know already checked it out. They're loving following along, man. Appreciate that, man.

Yeah, of course. And I'll drop the information for anybody who wants to check that out and to check out Chris on Instagram. We're getting Chris really moving and shaking here on Instagram. Thanks, thanks, thanks, man. I appreciate that, dude. So if you guys enjoy this episode with Chris and you want to send them a message, make sure you hit the link down on the show notes and jump onto his Instagram page. Yeah. Thank you.

And check out the app. Well, thank you, Chris. Any closing thoughts? Thanks, man. Thank you so much for having me on. Life is good, man. Life is so good on this side of it. You get over that hump and you get onto this side of sobriety, man.

beautiful and I'm a grateful recovering addict and alcoholic and grateful to be on your show Brad. Yeah, thank you, man. Thanks, bro. Well, there it is. Another incredible story here on the podcast. Thank you, Chris, for joining us, for sharing your story with all of us and just really letting us know what's possible if we put one foot in front of the other and just stay on this journey, all the good things to come. I'll drop also the link down to the show notes to check out Sober City USA. Chris is an incredible app.

He's really a lot put into this. So very impressed with it. And I'll drop the link down on the show notes for that. And I'll see you on the next one.