Sober Motivation: Sharing Sobriety Stories - A Second Chance: Living A Sober Life With Garrett

Episode Date: May 22, 2025

In this episode, Garrett shares his inspiring journey from a troubled childhood marked by addiction to starting his sober journey in 2020. Garrett discusses growing up in a family plagued by addiction, his own struggles with alcohol and drug use from a young age, and the turning point that led him to take back his life.  Garrett's story is a testament to resilience, dedication, and breaking the cycle of generational curses. And this is Garrett’s story on the sober motivation podcast. ------------  Connect with Garrett on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/garrett_welsh_/   00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome 00:20 Garrett's Childhood and Family Struggles 02:29 High School Challenges and Expulsion 03:51 First Rehab Experience and ADHD Diagnosis 07:13 Early Substance Use and Addiction 14:28 Family Dynamics and Personal Struggles 16:48 Post-High School Life and Job Issues 19:32 Daily Life and Realizations 28:19 Health Concerns and Sobriety Journey 30:32 Facing Fears and Health Realizations 31:29 The Turning Point: Getting Sober 33:28 Struggles and Strategies for Sobriety 35:47 Isolation and Self-Discovery 40:02 Maintaining Sobriety in Social Settings 50:51 Weight Loss and Transfer Addiction 54:24 Reframing Thoughts and Personal Growth 01:00:56 Final Reflections and Encouragement  

Welcome back to season four of the Sober Motivation podcast. Join me, Brad, each week as my guests and I share incredible and powerful sobriety stories. We're here to show sorority as possible, one story at a time. Let's go. In this episode, we have Garrett, who shares his inspiring journey from a troubled childhood surrounded by addiction to finding sobriety in 2020. Garrett discusses growing up in a family plagued by addiction, his own struggles with alcohol and drug use from a young age and the turning point that led him to take his life back.

Garrett's story is a testament to resilience, dedication, and breaking the cycle of generational curses. And this is Garrett's story on the sober motivation podcast. Welcome back to another episode of the sober motivation podcast. Today we've got Garrett with us. Garrett, how are you? I'm doing well, man. Thank you for having me.

Yeah, and you're just back. We were chatting a little bit before, and I saw a lot of your videos just back from your Alaskin crews and everything, man. excited for you. So thanks so much for making some time to jump on the show and share your story with us. Of course. Thank you. What were things like for you growing up? So growing up, it was a little bit difficult for me. My family has always struggled with addictions of alcohol, drugs, and all of that. So like, I've always just been surrounded by it. And I think that's what made it so easy for me to fall into addiction, is that seeing it and seeing the effects of it,

it should have scared me, but I was just like leaning into it more. And I think that's where I realized, like, I have that addictive personality. And so, you know, growing up, I was in a household where there was a bunch of arguing. There was things that, you know, I have strongly. struggled with, my parents have struggled with, and even my grandparents struggled with, and it just, like, kind of passed down generations without any fixing. So that's what I'm trying to do now is, you know, break those generational curses. But I actually lost my father in 2012, and that was to suicide.

He fell back into addiction after struggling with a divorce, and then that was, he fell back into addiction. after struggling with a divorce, and then that addiction led to suicide. Wow. That's heavy, man. Do you have any siblings or you only child? Yeah, so I'm actually the youngest. I have two older brothers as well.

Okay. And where did you grow up? San Diego, California, actually. Oh, wow. What was that like? It was nice. Everybody always thinks it's like, oh, palm trees and beaches, but I'm from, like, East County, San Diego.

So it was more like, I wouldn't say on the, ghetto side, but it was more like country living and like, because my school, my high school had like agriculture class and the rodeo right there and everything as well. So it was a little cool town, but it did get ghettoized. Yeah, okay. Good man. Good, good, good picture painted there for us. What were things like for you in school? So I was always like the troubled kid. I would always just like, you know, be looking for who could get me the next fix and, you know, all of that. I didn't really focus on school at all because every time I went to school, it was really, that's where I got my drugs. That's where I got my alcohol and things like that, which is weird to say.

But, I mean, I don't know if it's like that now, but like when I was in high school, it was so easy to get whatever you wanted. and, you know, I actually got expelled from my high school because I forgot this until the other day I said it to my buddy. And I got expelled because I was so drunk at the high school football game, I threw up on the bleachers. And then they realized I was drunk. And instead of arresting me, they just called my parents to come pick me up. And I had to deal with the school on the following Monday. and because I had like, I think it was like 14 referrals or something like that, they're just like, no, we don't want you here anymore. Wow, what grade was that in?

That was senior year. Senior year, wow. So I didn't get to go to prom or anything like that because of that. Oh, man. Well, I'm with you. I'm not going to the prom. I went to rehab. The first time I went to rehab, I was 17.

So I graduated from the rehab school right outside of Knoxville, Tennessee. I didn't have that kind of send off party too. But I'm with you, man. I got in trouble. You know, I remember back in middle school, middle school days, I would be the only one.

They had this in school suspension thing and I'd be the only one. You know, to me, I don't know. It was, looking back, I was definitely struggled to follow the rules and just kind of go with the flow.

And it definitely caused some problems. What was it like for you earlier, though, when you were never really interested in school or just, hard to identify with it, plug in? Yeah, I really couldn't pay attention, and I got diagnosed with, like, ADHD, like freshman year. So it kind of makes sense of why I could never, like, really pay attention.

So I was prescribed Adderall. But rather than taking it and using it as a tool, I sold it. So I was actually just selling my own medications at high school, trying to make money off of that for no reason, I guess. Yeah, I can relate with that too, man, the ADHD thing, the Adderall. I mean, I did take mine for a bit and then I stopped taking it. When I stopped taking it, that's when I had a whole whirlwind of problems. I didn't even realize it, but I was pretty good.

If I took it, I was kind of like a zombie. I didn't really have much personality or wasn't extremely impulsive. Yeah, but then when I stopped taking it, I remember it. So clearly my parents, they used to watch me, you know, like they give me this. And even when I was younger, I remember going up to the office. a couple times a day, right, before they had this extended release stuff and they give you your dose and everything. And then I missed a dose one day and I felt like I had just come alive. And it was just like it was just unmanageably out of control. But I stopped taking it because

I felt like I was making friends and I was able to connect with people. And when I was taking it, it was so difficult to do that. I just kind of felt like a fly on the wall. You know, that you relate to that? Yeah, 100%. Because I did take it like a few times, but I didn't. liked the way I felt. So that's when I decided just to sell it. And so it kind of had the same feeling of when I like got older and I tried to take more anxiety medicine because I realized I did have like pretty bad anxiety like in my early 20s. And I tried that and it was the same feeling, right? I didn't have like any emotions. I didn't really feel anything. I just felt like mellow, I guess, the whole time. But that's when I realized like, like,

like it's important to feel your emotions. It's important to feel the anxiety, the depression, the anger, because it shapes who you are, right? Because of when you're put in those positions and things like that, it's ultimately how you react to those situations that are going to dictate how you get out of it. Yeah. So that's like what my feeling is now is like, I still feel all of those. I still feel like the anxiety, the depression, all of that.

but I have such a clear head now. I could take a different approach on it and really figure out the why behind it. Yeah. Interesting too. A little insight into the development that, you know, happens over time. Take us back to when you first got introduced to, you mentioned drugs there a little bit too, but drugs and alcohol, when you first got introduced to the substances and what was that like? So I think the first thing I tried was just cigarettes.

I was like 10, but that addictive personality came alive when I first tried cigarettes. And I stole the little butts for my dad that he left in the garage so he wouldn't notice that I was smoking it. And so I liked the feeling from that. And then it moved on to weed and I tried that. And then it got to the point of like right when I started high school, I tried pills. And I can't remember exactly what I tried. It might have been like percocets or Vicodin or something. But right when I started that, I was just like, oh, okay, this feeling's nice.

I kept writing that. And then I told myself, I remember clearly I told myself, I'm down to try everything. I just won't inject myself or snort anything. Then it got to the point where I was doing like cocaine and trying, like snorting the pills because I wanted to feel it faster rather than just taking it. it. And I don't know if you know, but the difference of snorting something is way different than ingesting it. So I really liked that feeling, and it just kept riding the wave of that. And then it got to the point of where I was only doing cocaine and alcohol. And then I still, to like my highest point, I never.

injected anything because that was like where I draw the line. I was like, no, I cannot do that. You know, I have, I knew in the back of my head I was able to come back from something. It's just I knew if I did that, I wouldn't be able to, I think. Yeah. Yeah, it's interesting sort of how it plays out and makes sense to us at the time for the drinking. I mean, even when you reflect in high school, so things were pretty heavy for you in high school then. All of this is going on in high school. Yeah, I lost my dad. I think it was like sophomore junior year. And then right then, I was just like, fuck it. You know, whatever. And it, like I said, it should have scared me because the addiction ran through him, the addiction ran through his parents. And even on my mom's side,

like, my great aunt, she had psoriasis of the liver because she was so addicted to alcohol. And she was, she died before I was alive. But the stories and everything I heard of her is like, you know, She was drinking rubbing alcohol to the point trying to get some alcohol into her system because they took it all. I was like, that's insane. Yeah. Well, it's so interesting, too, you kind of bring up that, you know, the generational curse, you know, thing. We see stuff talked about that here and there. You bring up there, too, about you should have been from what you grew up around, right?

From what maybe what you saw, right, hinting at and sharing a little bit of what you saw growing up, it would it would kind of make logical sense i think to say well i saw i see the destruction so i'll stay away from it you know and that is a handful of people's stories and there's a lot of people who share a very similar trend to this right on the podcast you know what i think is so interesting about it is like i feel like even though we know the dangers we see the dangers if we've grown up in a tough environment do we have the tools because i mean i think it's one thing to like logically know that it could lead to, you know, a tough future for us. But do we have the tools on an emotional level to figure out how we're going to navigate

this and how am I going to go through life and deal with things, you know, with maybe healthier coping strategies? And I think a lot of the time I look at my life and I say, I knew better, but I didn't know how to deal with what was coming at me. I just didn't have those skills. I didn't know how to ask for help. I didn't know how to hang out with, you know, maybe people that were going to be more positive for me.

Like, I just kind of made poor choice after poor choice a lot of the time. And it just kind of became the norm. What are your thoughts on that? So that's exactly how it is. And it kind of like snowballs, right? You try it once. And you're like, ah, fuck it. It just keeps going worse and worse.

And I think that's a powerful statement is like, I knew better, but I decided the destruction more is because it's true, right? I should have known better. I've hung out with people. Like, how I've lost so many friends to addiction, and it should have changed me. But it didn't. It only made me want it more in a way. And it's freaking weird to say that, like out loud, right?

Because even people, like, I post now, like, about my weight loss. They're like, oh, you should have known you were that big. You shouldn't let yourself get that big in the first place. But it's like, I didn't have the nutritional guidance growing up. up. I didn't have, you know, any, my, my, like, growing up was different than other people's, so it's, it was hard to ask for help in weight loss or, like, in health in general with sobriety. And I kind of was just stressing about everything at once and, you know, losing my father, losing friends, like, because I lost my father and three close friends within, like, a two to

three-year span of high school. And dealing with all of that as a teenager, I didn't know how to handle that. And so trying to escape it was the only kind of closure I had in a way. Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean, it makes sense. It kind of reminds me of this quote, and I don't even know who to give it credit to, but it kind of goes like, why do you always take the hard road? And then the other person responds, why do you assume I see two roads? That's fine. And I think it kind of relates to, you know, this journey in a sense is like we do the best we can with what we've got, you know, but we don't maybe know all the things or really

have the tools to go out there and explore it. And even though I look back and reflect on my reckless path and everything I was doing. And it just didn't really make a whole lot of sense. But it's the kind of the way things went. Like I really believe, even though. Looking at it now, I'm like, how could you say that? I really believed I was trying to do the best with what I had. I mean, I didn't have confidence in myself. The indicators I got from the world were that I wasn't good enough. I didn't do well in school. I wasn't the best looking dude at the school. I didn't excel in sports. Things with my parents restrained. I mean, they were great parents. They provided every opportunity for me, but I just couldn't see that at the time. I could feel their love with, you know, when I was younger, it was all about. I'm pressing my buddies and people who like are now not even part of my life, but it felt at that time. You know what I mean?

When you're in you're in that, it feels like it's, man, this is everything. And it's like you just can't see past it. Was there anybody in your family that you were close with, like with your siblings or with your mom? Not really. My family kind of fell apart after the divorce. My parents got divorced a few years before my dad committed to a suicide. and that kind of like broke my family apart in a way. My brothers, we've gone a little closer over the years recently,

but before I was just focused on myself and getting fucked up, finding the next party. You know, I didn't really think because my family was close, like, that I could fix it. So, like, rather than trying to fix it now, I just talk to them, like, individually, like seeing how they're doing and things like that. Because even my brothers, like my two older brothers, they don't talk anymore.

And my mom, she tries to talk to everybody, kind of like I do. But she hasn't broken the generational curses on her side, per se. And she's still trying to work on herself daily, which I give her credit for. and, you know, I try to help to the best of my ability from what I've been through. But, you know, it's kind of hard. I could see it from her way to take advice from your own kid. Because, you know, she lived a completely different life. And this is her first life that she's living, right?

So she has to learn things on her own. And it's just like how I did. Because I didn't ask for help when I got sober. I just did it. Yeah. Yeah. And to try to help people too. Yeah, I mean, it can be a challenge too. And everybody has sort of their own experience that kind of brought them here. Right. That's why it's like it's why sometimes I hear this. And I know people have good intentions, but you hear kind of this general sort of, you know, do this, do that. You'll figure it out. But I think it's always important to kind of realize probably the work you do now to understand where people kind of come from to see what, you know, my people. be most helpful for them, right? And kind of trying things out. Where do you go after high school? So after high school, I got a job and I thought it was a great opportunity. It was at the casino near my high school. And I got into like the security there. And it was a very easy job. But I called

out every time because I worked graveyard. And so I worked on the weekends and that would interrupt my partying. So I would call out like every Saturday and they were just like, you know what, we don't need you. Like, you're expendable. Like, go. And then from there, I just got depressed about that, not holding that job. I got another job and I was able to hold that one for about two years. I was doing like inventory control. And, you know, same thing. I would come to work, hung over every time I would just worry about the next party, my next fix. Right after work, I would go meet my buddies at the bar and we'd drink till night. Then I'd go home and sleep.

And then I got fired from that job. It's just like it was a snowball effect of like, why did I keep getting fired from these jobs? Why can I not seem to get this right? And it was all because of me. It was because my poor choices. It was because I decided alcohol over a career. it was because I decided to try to escape my reality rather than working towards something greater. Yeah, which is great in hindsight reflecting back for how those things are.

But I can only imagine, too, I guess I lost a few jobs too, man. I'm with you on that. And I don't know if you'll relate to this or not. But when I was stuck up in it, man, I would throw pity parties, man. It would kind of feel bad for myself and would maybe use that for a few. You know, like poor me, I'm always getting the, you know, when I was wrapped up in it, I'm always getting the short end of the stick or why can't I catch a break for stuff? And the reality was when I look back, you know, like after I got sober and I'm like, man, I caught so many breaks. Like more breaks than what other than I saw, whether it be bosses or people that were giving me opportunities would have given anybody else.

But I think for me, it was just so easy to blame everybody else. As long as I blamed everybody else for where I was in my life, I didn't have to take any accountability. responsibility or do anything different. Absolutely. That's how my whole life was, is not taking accountability and blaming everything for everybody else and then playing the victim mentality of why is this happening to only me? Yeah. Yeah. And it's a really tough place to kind of get out of, too, right? Because then it just, the cycle kind of rinses and repeats. What did a day in the life look like for you? Were you drinking at the bar every day? Yeah. So I'll start to like, after high school.

So basically on a Friday, well, what happened is I would get off of work around 2 p.m. I'd call my buddies and we'd meet at the bar by like 3.30. And that would be happy hour or like our favorite time was like ladies night at the bar. There was no ladies there, but it was half off drinks and Long Islands that we call strong islands. And, you know, we just had a great time together and it was fun. Like I don't like, don't get me wrong. I had a great time hanging with those. friends because in the moment, you know, you're not thinking of, you know, why am I doing this and that

in the moment, I was just having fun. And it was a great time. I was living life. But then after the bar at like midnight, we would go to a house party. And then it would lead to two to three night benders and going back to the bar at six in the morning when it just opened and the bartenders are like, oh, you guys were up early. We're like, no, we didn't sleep. And then I would try to cure my hangover all the time with, like, fast food. And my go-to was always, like, Mexican food. And I would get, like, a carnisade burrito and roll tacos and then pass out.

Yeah. And then we'll go back to work and then go to work eventually or Monday morning or try to? Monday morning. When was the first time? Any time in throughout here that you're like, oh, man, I, I, I want to try to cut back or maybe make changes or any sort of... Every Monday. Every Monday after a bender, I was just like, dude, this shit sucks.

Why do I feel like this? Why do I keep doing this to myself? Why can't I just like feel normal in a way? And I thought that's just like how my life was going to be. I thought that was normal because that's all I knew for years on end at that time. Yeah. Yeah, it's interesting. But I always thought too, man, when I was kind of in the earlier stages, too, I always thought, like, I would outgrow this. I knew that we were taking a lot of risks. We were getting in trouble.

And I was like, you know what, but I'll just wake up one day and obviously I'll outgrow all of this and I'll, you know, finish college and I'll do all these things. And like, man, I believe that. And it never, like, that never was the way it played out. I thought the same thing. I always thought to myself, like, I remember specifically I was sitting in the car at a house party with three of my friends. We were drinking in the car and I was well over 400 pounds still at this point. And they were looking at me and talking to me like, we're having that heart to heart. You know when you're fucked up and you're like, buddy buddies. You're like, oh, and they were telling me straight up.

They're like, dude, we're worried about you. Like, we want you to get in the gym because they were in the gym. They still worked out. They did everything and they partied on the weekends. And I was just like, oh, okay. And, you know, they were telling me all this. And I'm like, ah, pushing it off. I'm like, no, I'm okay.

Like, I don't want to go. Like, I'm fine. They're like, no, like, you understand. Like, it will change your life. And I'm like, no, the gym's not going to change my life. And then I told them, I remember I will get in the gym at some point and I will lose this weight. And I will get sober. But right now, I don't want to.

And that was because I was. I was just fixated on finding that next party, you know, finding my next fix, and still trying to escape reality because I was playing my victim mentality. Yeah. Oh, that's powerful right there, man. You know, it's kind of like, it's that hindsight again, too, right? We can see it now when we look back, but when you're in the middle of it, it's really hard to see it.

But you said something else there that stood out to me. You have to want to do it. You know, that's kind of, I think that's one of the pieces to the puzzle. You have to want to do it because it's not going to be easy. It's going to be uncomfortable. It's going to be different than what maybe we're so used to about dealing with. You brought up the emotions earlier and dealing them and processing and working through everything that comes up.

And it's just such like foreign territory for us to go into. But you have to, you have to want to do it. So when things get difficult, you can stick. to it. Did you know any sober people around you? Did you have anybody that was sober? I don't think so. At the time, I, there was a couple friends who like I got sober for like, what is it, dry January or something. And then the next month, they're like, oh, I feel great and went back to party. And so I was like, I got sober. I tried to get sober multiple times before. and it was really just like for a week.

And then once my hangover was gone, once I feel great, I'm like back into it. And so I think, you know, surrounding myself with people who were drug dealers or, you know, just wanting to party and just hanging with the bad, like, wrong crowd, really portrayed of who I was going to be. And, you know, I think that's really beneficial to, like, my growth now is, like, My circle, it's gotten a lot smaller, but it's gone a lot better. So I actually have people I could rely on. I have people I could trust. It's the four quarters analogy. Four quarters is better than a hundred pennies.

Absolutely. You hear that in a lot of stories too about, you know, and I think there's a part of me anyway that was doing it on purpose. Like I didn't want to hang out with people that knew where they were going in life, I guess. Because I would feel even worse about where I wasn't. It wasn't going in life. It was that jealousy. Yeah.

So I purposefully think I surrounded myself with other people that were in and around where I was. You know, we kind of co-sign each other's BS. Me and my buddies did anyway, right? Like, oh, yeah, it's not that bad. Or, you know, look at so-and-so, they're way but worse off. And it's like, man, it's only a matter of time before we ended up in the same place that we thought everybody else was so worse off. Like we were heading there fast.

How old are you now? I'm 29. I turned 30 in November. Man, incredible. So as you kind of get closer to, right, in 2020, when you got sober. And that was what was difficult because it was right in the middle of COVID. Yeah. I'm thinking too bad because I've seen all your videos, right?

From afar here for a bit. I mean, it's like drinking, you know, like what's the one on there? drinking two big coronas, drinking from bottles. I mean, did it, and you mentioned two before at 1.400 pounds. I mean, did it just require a lot of alcohol to get you going? Or what was that? So I built up a really strong tolerance. And so, like, that was the thing is, like, I never drank to have fun or, like, just to chill.

I drank to get blacked out. And then it just led to more and more. And so that's when I also realized, like, Alcohol is the source of all my problems because I didn't do Coke when I was sober. I didn't do anything else when I was sober. It was only when I was drunk is when I crave these other things. And so I think that was a big eye-opener. But being over 400 pounds, I didn't realize, like, I thought I was just my genetics that really led me to being that big.

but overall, like when I think about it now that I know nutrition and everything is like, I drink anything and everything. And me and one buddy would get like a 30 pack and go chill in the car outside of the bar, drink that whole thing before we went in and go drink more. And then we go get a bottle, sit in the car again with an eight ball, do that, then go back into the bar. It's like just a bunch of empty calories that I'm drinking and all the sugar from the alcohols And I wasn't the person to stick with like, like, clears or darks.

I drank anything and everything. It was handed to me. Yeah. And so I think just building up the tolerance and then eating fast food to try to cure the hangover the next day, like it led to those poor choices led to me being over 400 pounds. Yeah. And did you, so as you kind of come up to the day you got sober, I mean, were you experiencing anything health-wise that was being impacted, you know, from these choices or no?

So I was actually talking to an interested client the other day, and I was telling him how blessed he was because he was almost 500 pounds and he had no health conditions other than just like a little bit of limited mobility in his knees, but that's just from the weight. And I was telling him, that's like me. I was lucky enough, like I didn't have any blood pressure issues. I didn't have any blood pressure issues. I didn't have any really health concerns other than undiagnosed sleep apnea. And I didn't know I had that until it was gone. Because I realized, like, I'm actually getting a lot better sleep now.

And that's something that, like, my grandpa would always, like, make fun of me, too. Because he's, my grandpa's Irish, and so he's very direct. But he would always say, like, you know, he was worried about my health because my grandma had diabetes. and diabetes runs in my family because we're all overweight and things like that. And so he's like, you're going to get diabetes. You know, you're going to have high blood pressure. Like, you're going to die. And I'm like, no, jokes on you.

I actually am healthy. But I wasn't. Because of my weight. Yeah. And I mean, I'm only guessing here. It's not obviously my expertise at all. But if you were to continue on that way, you know, because you're fairly young, right? Like me too, you know.

But if you're a continue. on that way it's probably not something you're going to escape eventually right there probably would have been or could have been serious stuff happening right with absolutely it was ruining everything like internally like overall my markers were good but every morning i would be throwing up blood i would be like spitting up black and it was weird and it worried me but i never went to the doctors because growing up my family it like was installed in our heads like if we don't go to the doctors and we're not diagnosed or something nothing's wrong so like that's something I'm still having to like break because I still hate the doctors I still hate the dentist all of that but because

of my poor choices growing up you know there are these things that I do need to correct now that I need to face my fears like going to the dentist is one of them and I'm scared shitless of them But it's something I need to do because overall it's the health that, like you said, over time is going to catch up to me. Yeah. Yeah. And that's an interesting perspective, too. Yeah. If you don't, it's kind of like what, out of mind at a site.

If you don't know about it, there's nothing there's nothing there. But I think there is obviously a piece of mind too about preventative, right? You know, preventative sort of thing. So, yeah, I mean, hey, we're all work in progress in one way or not. other, right? I'm with you too on the dentist. We just, we just move recently and I put off like this getting a new dentist for like forever. So what kind of prompted you to, you know, make this change and get sober? You said to, you mentioned you tried other things before for a week. You said there too, you're coughing up blood, throwing up blood in the morning.

Yeah, because of how much I drank. There was a couple times where like I threw up blood and And most of the time it was just like the bile, which I learned is like the stomach lining of your stomach when you have like no food, no water, anything in there. Your body is just trying to like get something up. But it's your stomach lining from the alcohol that is just like burning. It's almost like an acid reflux coming up. Yeah. It burns too. Yeah.

I had that every morning. But I had times where my buddy would buy me alcohol when I had no money. But it would always be like the grossest kind of alcohol. because it was funny. So he got me like a fifth of Everclear. And I didn't realize at the time how strong Everclear was. And I ended up drinking the whole bottle in the night. And that's when I woke up, like, throwing out blood.

And I thought the only way to cure it was to drink more. So after I threw up, I drank Coors Light and I like washed it down. I was like, oh, yeah, I'm fine. But overall, like, when I think about it now, I'm just like, dude, how was I? living like that like every day yeah like every day for for years right like how many years would i was struggling in addiction for over 12 years before i actually just made the decision to change and when i got sober like like i explained before when i got when i tried to get sober i would i would literally just say to myself when i was hung over you know i'm never drinking again

and then I would continue to try to live my life and I would fall right back into old ways because of the crowd I hung out with because of the things I surrounded myself with and things like that. But in 2019, I moved from San Diego to Arizona and I basically was trying to find a new start. I knew I needed to do better. My grandpa kicked me out from living with him because he knew that, you know, I was just partying. I just got a DUI and got arrested. And, you know, like, my life was just going downhill. And he didn't want me just, like, taking advantage of living there. So I moved out here with my mom.

And then I was just doing the same thing. I found a job that was able to pay for my alcohol and drug addiction. And, you know, I was just going to random dive bars out here, meeting people, and then going to party with them at night, you know, literally living the same lifestyle I tried to escape from. and it just dawned on me one morning after a party. I literally said the same thing. I'm never drinking again. And this time was different.

It felt weird because I kind of meant it this time. And so I literally poured out the alcohol I bought the night before. And I was just like, you know what, this time I'm serious. I went cold turkey and I didn't look back. Wow. And that was, when was that? What day was? July 25th of 2020, right in the middle of pandemic. Wow, man. You know, it's so interesting, right? Because there's, I mean, there's a lot of different ways that bring people to kind of that moment or that decision or those moments or decisions that they make. You know, it's kind of like a lot of the talk in the space is like rock bottom, right? You hit the rock bottom and then you bounce off of it and get. get sober. A lot of the stories is there's like a lot of rock bottoms, you know, I mean,

in one way or another, right, whether they're rock bottoms or it's a little bit rocky or it's difficult times, however, whatever word we use for it, it seems like there's a lot, man. And it's from hearing like in a short, you know, amount of time connecting here, like it's probably just a couple grains of sand on the beach, right? There's probably a lot more to the story, right? A lot of tough times, difficult times, and to waking up and, you know, going through all of that. What really helped you sort of? So you moved to Arizona, too, for the first start. I was thinking of this quote that I heard when I was in rehab and it said, wherever you go, there you are, you know? In other words, like, we can change our surroundings and everything,

but if we don't do the work on the inside internally, like wherever we go, there we are, so you kind of experience that in real time. Yeah. What were the first, like, couple days like? And how did you know it was for real this time? First couple of days fucking sucked. I wanted to go out. And, you know, I kind of isolated myself from everything.

And it was easy because it was in the middle of COVID. So, you know, everything was closed except the liquor stores. So I knew if, you know, I just didn't go out, then I don't have anything to worry about. And I know it's probably not the healthiest way to get sober, but it's what worked for me. And I think that's also what's difficult about getting sober is the philosophies of having people tell you how to get sober. Now, we talked earlier about like you're having to want it. A lot of people want it, but a lot of people don't know how. And so they're told different ways.

You have to go to rehab. You have to go to AA. You have to go to this and do that. When in reality, you have to find what works for you. And what worked for me is really isolating myself because in that moment of isolation and being alone with my thoughts and my emotions and everything, I was stuck dealing with it. I had to find a way to work through it and work around it rather than trying to fight against it.

And I think that's what worked really great for me is because I did try AA after I had my DUI. I was court ordered to go. But honestly, like I said, I have nothing wrong or anything bad to say about people who take different routes to get sober. The goal overall is just to get sober, right? And however you do it, it's great for you. What worked for me is that isolation. And I tried to tell people, you know, like, I have a buddy that just went on Monday to rehab. and he literally tried everything he can to get sober,

but no matter what he did, no matter where he surrounded himself with, he basically just kept falling back into old ways. And so he reached out for help to a rehab. They were able to get him in, and he left right after my wedding on Saturday. He went on Monday up to Los Angeles and then went straight to rehab.

He just texted me and he's like, you know, this is my first week I completed. I'm learning to relearn myself again, and this is great. And my biggest thing for him is I told him, like, use these tools to your advantage. This is a new opportunity at your second chance of life. And you don't want to leave anything on the table. You want to be able to work through this because I know you want a better life. I wanted a better life, and I worked for it.

You know, you don't get things handed to you. You have to work through it. Yeah. No, that's such a great lesson too. Yeah, you have to work at it and to find your own path. And I mean, I think that's incredibly encouraging for what works for people and what they identify with and what's going to be most helpful for each person and what's going to make sense. You know, a lot of people get into this right. There's that fomo that can be a part of it. And I mean, you're spending a lot of time out. So the picture I'm getting painted on my end here is that it's not only the drinking. It's also, I think, like that identity. kind of being that party guy and it's that social lubricant and that easy connection, right? It's really easy to connect with people when you go into a bar and you're drinking. Yeah, you know, like you can make that connection. Sober it takes time to like go and meet people and make new friends and stuff like that. So you're not only leaving about the drinking, the drugs, but also maybe that other distraction

of going out and partying and all of that stuff. But what was that like leaving behind that lifestyle as well? So I think within the first, like first year, I still went to a couple parties and, you know, I just chose not to drink because I was already past like three, four months. And by then, I feel like the urges kind of went away. I realize, you know, like I feel a lot better now. Like, I may not be where I want to be, but I do feel better overall. So I don't need this. I, like, my life is already getting a little bit better. I don't. I don't. need to choose this anymore. I choose not to. And so I went to a couple parties and like the people were respectful. They're like not offering me shots, but like I feel like me pushing myself to pour them drinks and things like that helped me conquer my fears of being around it. So like, I know a lot of people when they get sober, they're like, you know, I'm not going to be around people that drink. I'm not going to do this. I'm not going to do that. But I think that's putting your

in a restrictive lifestyle. And, you know, that was my biggest thing is I was living over 400 pounds. I was being an alcoholic and drug addict. And, you know, because of my actions, I was already living a restrictive lifestyle. So why would I put myself in another if I'm trying to escape that? Right. So what I did is I chose to live a better life for me because I knew I deserved it at the time. And like I said, I kept looking back on that time in the car with my buddies saying,

I know I can do this and I will just when I'm ready. And I think at that point, I knew I was ready. And even now, like at my bachelor party, I went to Vegas with all my friends. They were drinking and I was pouring shots for them and having fun. And I was toasting them with a Heineken Zero. Because my favorite thing is like, I guess like feeling included in a way, like when I'm out drinking or like if my wife and I go to have dinner and she gets like a wine, I'll get a Heineken Zero just because I want to feel like I am drinking in a way.

Yeah. But I don't feel like I need the urge to drink or feel that type of way. I just like having that feeling of the zero. Yeah. No, I hear that. And that makes a ton of sense, right? I think the big reason why a lot of us are doing this is so we, we, we, we, we, we, I hear that. I think the big reason why a lot of us are doing this is so we can have a good life and live a good

life. And, you know, I think it is important for some people to have a little bit of a buffer zone too. It sounds like you had a couple of months there too, why it's not like necessarily jumping right into it. But eventually, I think that's the reality. If we're going to go anywhere, I mean, where are you going to go? You're going to go out to eat dinner. You're going to go and watch a game. You're going to go to a concert. You leave the house and there's billboards everywhere. So, I mean, eventually, I mean, we can we can create that buffer zone in those, you know, those tough moments for us for a little bit. But like, it might be a bit much to like live a life where we're never around it. But I love that you're sharing this too as you get to a spot in your life where it can be around and you just aren't interested.

You know, I mean, that's the reality of it too is your life starts to change. And you start to see the benefits of living a different, you know, living different. it's that you can be around it and it's just like man i'm just not interested in that at all and i think the biggest thing is just growing up like realizing that you know i'm greater than my urges and that i'm stronger than what i need or what i feel that i need when i know right from wrong before growing up i knew right from wrong but i chose to go the wrong paths now i choose to grow more than anything And so I saw a quote and it made me laugh because it was so true. It says alcohol is the only drug that we need to explain why we don't do it.

Yeah. And I was just like, damn, it's true because every time I go out and everybody wants to like say they're just getting a round of shots for the table, I'm like, I don't drink. Like I'm sober. They're like, oh, why? I'm like, what do you mean why? And then I have to explain my whole story again. I'm like, shit, we're going to be here all night. Record a pot.

Yeah, just, well, after this, man, we launched this. You can just slide them a business card and be like, just check out my podcast. Exactly. Listen to it. Yeah, it is interesting, man. I mean, it's the only drug that that's the way it is, right? I mean, if you were telling people you weren't doing cocaine anymore or weren't doing the pills anymore, I mean, you get a high five and a pat on the back, right?

Yeah. But it's a little bit, um, it can be able to. a little bit different approach from some. I do feel like we're heading in a much better direction than we were, say, a decade ago about, you know, how people are viewing maybe somebody who's quit drinking. Because ultimately, I think people have this sort of picture in their head that they saw in the movies or that they saw somebody struggle with or something. It's not everybody's story. Everybody's story is a little bit different.

It's just the way it is, right? So, but I'm with that. Yeah. Some people were just like, why, you know, why it's like dude just do a quick Google search and figure out why it's a good idea for people not to drink alcohol just with the problems you know even when I look back at my life and even people around me who still drink I mean I obviously still know a lot of people who do drink and yeah you know anytime there's chaos or there's problems or there's drama in life 90% of it's

connected to a night of drinking or somebody was drinking or they were drinking and when I look at I look back at my life and 98% of the times things went sideways. I was drinking or someone else was. You know, so it's like it's just has such that such of an impact, right? And not the greatest way. I also picked up on kind of before where you mentioned too. Like there were, you know, times that you did enjoy, you know, things. And I'm the same way.

And my whole addiction story as bad as it got with everything. Like there were times that I did. had been joy. Maybe it kept me afloat when things were really dark in my life, you know. But I also kind of, and a lot of people share this. We come to the point where it's fun until it's not anymore, until it's just not, you know. Any thoughts on that? And that's exactly how like I was, because, you know, I don't want to glorify alcohol or partying or anything. And if you could drink in moderation and not have a problem, great, all power to you. But I'm not the type that was to do that, right? I want to be able to have a beer at dinner and enjoy it. But like I said, I have an

adity personality and one beer led to five, then led to a bottle, then led to an eight ball. And it was all because of that one beer. So, you know, I did have fun in the moments. But the next mornings, when I got back to real life and I wasn't out of it, I realized how shitty it was. And that's like what some people ask there all the time. They're like, do you miss drinking? Do you miss partying? And I say, back then, I would say yes. Now, I've already lived it.

I've already gone through it. I know what it's like. And I know what I don't want and what I do want for my future. And, you know, even like now I'm freshly married, we're going to be trying to start a family soon. And I don't want to push that onto my kids or like even my kids see me drinking and be like, oh, why does daddy always have a bottle in his hand? Like, no, I don't want to have to explain myself. And like even in January, I quit nicotine because that was one of the last spices I had.

And, you know, my wife made a good point because she said, said, I don't want you doing nicotine, but also I know that it is a vice you have. And, you know, when we do have kids, why they're going to be asking you, why do you keep throwing something in your mouth, you know, every hour? And I'm like, shit. That just hit me in my head. I'm like, I don't want to have to be explaining why I make poor choices to my kids in the future. And I think that was what was most powerful for me. And then that also made me realize, like, my parents could have done the same thing, right? They could have broke those generational curses, and I could have lived a better life.

But I also wouldn't be in the position I am now. I wouldn't be the person I am now if I didn't go through those struggles. If I didn't learn myself, if I didn't go through those moments of isolation, if I didn't choose to get sober that one day, I'd be living a completely different life. Yeah. So true, man. Yeah. And I've got three young kids, man.

And there's not a step that you're going to be able to take that they don't watch. They don't stay. Everything, man. Every single thing. I was just thinking of something, too. Oh, yeah, you just got married too, right? I mean, congrats on that. How exciting.

Thank you. When did you meet your wife when you were on this journey? Yeah, about halfway through. So we met two years ago. I proposed within like seven months because, you know, when you know, you know. And I wasn't going to waste any time. So we, I proposed to her on our trip to Colorado. And I couldn't be one of those guys that proposed on Valentine's Day. So we went to a nice dinner and I was like thinking in my head and like, she's going to think this is the time.

But reality is I did it the next morning. Kind of throw her off. And then we had a year-long engagement. We just got married two Saturdays ago, and then we went on a full seven-night cruise honeymoon to Alaska. Yeah, that's beautiful, man. Two Saturdays ago, you got to remember this date, man. She's going to ask you down the road. Yeah. Well, it's easy because we got married on May 10th, but we officially got married on our anniversary, which was April 28th. And because May 10th is like Mother's Day weekend, she's like, oh, we're actually just going to get married on.

our anniversary so we have one anniversary but then we could celebrate mother's day and the wedding on that day another thing too i wanted to touch on too i don't know the exact terminology for it but maybe your weight loss journey too and like what that's meant to you and in how sobriety has played if it has played a role in any in that you know as far as like you're improving your overall you know i'm just guessing here but your mental health and obviously your physical health in anything else. Like, what's that experience been like? So getting sober in general helps clear my thoughts.

It helped really, like, me understand, you know, there really isn't nothing I can't do. And so after I got sober, I didn't realize transfer addiction was a thing. And I actually never even heard of it until a few years ago. And, you know, what I did is, like, I was addicted to drugs and alcohol and food, but the food wasn't really a big part. I just ate like the wrong things at the wrong times and things like that.

But once I quit drugs and alcohol, I put all of my attention towards food and sodas and everything. So after a year of sobriety, I literally was not happy with where I was. Yeah, I was a year sober. I should have been proud. Everybody talks about, you know, a year's sobriety, how proud they are of themselves. but I didn't feel that. I still felt like like I wasn't doing what I was meant to be doing

and that's because I was still living in a healthy lifestyle. And I realized that. So I looked in the mirror and I told myself if I could get sober for a year, I could dedicate getting healthy for a year or at least getting in the gym and trying this. And so what I did is I started small, just like I did with, well, I didn't really start.

small with alcohol. I just quit everything. But I started small with my weight loss. And I knew, you know, I gained all this weight in, what, 26 years when I started, you know, it's not going to be a month or a year that I'm going to get it all off. So I started making healthier alternatives in the kitchen, just walking around my complex at the time. I dropped like 60 pounds in a few months. And I was like, oh shit, this is really happening. Like, I can lose weight. And so I got in the gym. started learning some shit online and like self-taught myself form and everything like that. And, you know, it just led to me being more consistent and becoming addicted to watching that number on the scale go down. And that's when I realized, like, you know, I really do have an addictive personality.

It's just putting my addiction towards something that is actually going to benefit me rather than something that's going to tear me down. Yeah. So that's when it started one year into your sobriety. It's like, yeah, let's start working on this a little bit. Wow, man. That's incredible. And I think that's what was like the most powerful moment for me is because I knew I was meant for something greater. But I didn't just talk about it. I was like, you know what? I could do this. Why can't I do this? Why can't I do this? Rather than a few years before I got sober, I was like, why is this all happening to me? Why can't I do this? Why can't I do that? I literally just like reframed the way I thought and I just had the mentality of I can and I will. Yeah. Which it's important to do that. I'm just curious to what your process was for doing that. You know what I mean?

Gary, you're making it sound so simple for us here. I just reframed the thought and here you are, man. But what was it like for you? I mean, I think if I had to guess part of it is that we just get to a spot where we just feel so bad. It's like, man, I have to make the changes and then you kind of do. But what was that experience like for you to get from that spot of, I need to make these changes and how do we go through doing it? I think it's just like the time and giving myself grace because I lived so long in depression, you know, suicidal thoughts and, you know, just just living life, barely living life. And I knew, you know,

I've done wrong for so long. Why can't I try to do better? And I didn't know that the saying, you do good, good things will happen to you was true. You know, I started treating people differently. I was treating myself differently and things around me started slowly changing. And I know what I say, you know, makes it seem easy. And the morality is it's not easy. But it is simple.

We all know what we need to do. Even if you're a teenager and you're going through what we went through with addiction or like falling with the wrong crowd, there's so many different help and resources. Even social media, there's people like me and a couple other friends who post about like, you know, learning from our mistakes. But it's what we do is we tend to overcomplicate things. we tend to overcomplicate life. And in reality, is, things are pretty simple. It's just finding a way to work through it and reframing the way you think. And by reframing it, I mean catching yourselves in the moment.

But you have to believe in yourself. So I think giving yourself grace and knowing that time is going to pass anyway is going to help you reframe the way you think. Yeah, wow. No, that's, I mean, that's what it's all about is those small steps. I love that you pointed out the thing to about Simple. Because I look back at it. Look, this is sort of like maybe a bigger picture thing.

But I look over 200-something stories. I talk to people about sobriety all day, every day. And you know what? A lot of people, it's difficult, right? It's difficult, but a lot of people say, it was easier than they thought it was going to be. I think there's something that happens. I don't have the exact words for it in this moment.

But there's something we just feel like it's a mountain. We just can't climb. So we refuse to even take the first couple of steps because it feels so overwhelming. But I think once we first to take the couple of steps and day after day after day, we look back and it was like, man, what was I making that so difficult for? You know? And like, I don't want to take it. away from the fact that it is difficult. It is tough, right? It is uncomfortable. It is new. It's

something completely different. And we have to learn, you know, kind of in some ways, how to live again or how to live. But I hear it so much that it wasn't as difficult as I worked it up between my ears. I think where we work it up in here, we complicate it. And I wonder if even the complicating factor keeps us comfortable because our brain wants to protect us and keep us comfortable in the known. And I wonder if our brain is like, let's make it so complicated where Brad feels it's impossible. So he'll just stay comfortable, even if it's destroying his life. It is a weird thing. But I love that you brought up that reframe too. And I mean, probably in a lot of the coaching you do and a lot of people want to try to quit drinking, correct me if I'm wrong

here, but try to stay away from the all or nothing thinking. I mean, obviously the idea is improvement in both areas. But, you know, sometimes if one day doesn't go well, you know, it's kind of like the gym. Say you went to the gym 365, say you went to the gym 365, you know, some people will hone in on the one day they didn't make it. Yeah. Beat themselves up. But I think it's the reframe is like, hey, focus on how well you've done or when people aren't drinking. You know, I went 29 days out of the month, but I drank once. It's like, you know, progress is progress. Let's not forget about it. Even if, you know, the streak is not there.

Yeah. And going back on what you said first of, you know, like everything is hard. The process is hard. You know, it's not easy. But one thing that helped me in the beginning is understanding that everything is hard in the beginning. Because it's like you said, it's new. It's uncomfortable. Growth is uncomfortable.

But once you get over that hump, it's going to be so much easier. It's a clear ride. You have a clear thought process. you're able to actually communicate with yourself and people better and things like that. So having that all-end mentality, it's hard. And me and my wife actually deal with that because the couple times that she's gone with me to the gym, I'm like, hey, take it easy, like, you know, grow into it. No, she's fucking trying to lift as heavy as she can.

And I'm like, I'm like, all right, hey, you do you. But you're strong as hell. You're going to be sore tomorrow. And then she's sore and then she doesn't want to go to the gym again. And I'm like, that's what I, that's what you have to understand is like, you know, it's good to want more for yourself and to push yourself and things like that. But you don't have to always go all in. Small steps, no matter how cliche it is, small steps always lead to big results.

And like I said, that time is going to pass either way. So taking small steps, holding yourself accountable, and learning your body, but also learning your mind is going to help you grow immensely. Yeah, beautiful. Going all the way, the heaviest weights. Yeah. And we go on like a leg day. I'm like, no wonder you're not going to be able to walk for a week. Garrett, just thinking of wrapping up, man, I really appreciate you coming on here and sharing your story.

And huge congrats to you, man. I get the sense of things. You've done a lot of work, but you're just getting started in another sense as well. Any closing thoughts for us? I really hate to be that person that's like, I saw a quote, all this and that. But I did say this on one other podcast I was on,

and it really helped a lot of people. So I thought I'd share it here as well. It was a quote that I saw, and it says, even if you fall on your face, you fall forward. So no matter what you're going through, if you're stuck in a position or you don't know how to get through something, if you are still taking steps forward and you fall on your face, you're still moving forward. You're not going backwards. You're not going back to old habits. You're still able to progress moving forward.

Yeah. Awesome, Garrett. Thank you so much, man. I love that. Of course. Small steps in the right direction make all the difference. Yes, sir. and thank you for having me. It's been a pleasure.

Of course, man. Huge shout out to Garrett for jumping on the podcast. So many great things to take away from there on his journey, perspectives, reframs of how things were, to how things could be, to how things are now. Incredible episode. Thank you everybody for checking it out. If you haven't left a review yet on Apple or Spotify, jump over there. As the episode wraps up, leave a review of five stars all day. Garrett's contact information down in the show notes below, and I'll see you on the next one.